#like I'm sorry I study??
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Urgh it annoys me when my dad gets frustrated at me when we're just having a conversation.
Like okay I understood what you were saying but like I'm just talking about communicating with your doctor bitch wtf I don't care if the doctors don't care what you think you have
I'm saying that introduce with your fucking symptoms and the things you researched so they know what the fuck to look for? Otherwise what do I do? Walk in start talking about my everyday? Bitch I don't remember jack shit and I don't do jack shit what am I supposed to say? I watched Hannibal for the 40th time last night? The shit???
😭😭😭🥲🥲🥲🥲🫠🫠🫠🫠
#I'm also going to college for psychology tf???#like I'm sorry I study??#or some shit#damn#🧡🐾#🫀🦌#🖤🦔#vent post#psychology#diagnosis#doctors
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greta gerwig really said. when this girl gets a little sad and confused by the weird and complicated and uncomfortable parts of being human and growing up, she meets god and sits at her kitchen table, drinks her tea, holds her hands. and she asks god if she’s allowed to be happy. and god tells her she doesn’t need her permission. she tells her she’s going to be okay.
#barbie#barbie 2023#barbie spoilers#movies#greta gerwig#i just.#greta.................. may i study you#sorry i think i'm having a delayed reaction asdlhjfk#like i got a little misty in the theater but today i'm crying in my bed alshdjhf#too real!! too real.#no i cannot stop thinking about this
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i love your riddle design so much, he's so pointy and british. so gracious. do you think he would enjoy a brazilian goiabada
thank you! ❤️🖤❤️ it's just. important to me on a level I can't explain that Riddle have an extremely pointy nose that he can stick into everyone else's business.
also goiabada is sweet and fruity and red, I think he would like it very much indeed!
not me stealth-editing because I forgot his antenna whoops
#art#twisted wonderland#me: riddle's nose is important to me (draws him without a nose)#a study in contrasts?#regardless it is my power as a fanartist to let riddle eat sweets and by god i'm going to use it#i also love british riddle. briddle. it's just RIGHT.#i think about how someday the anime will come out and get dubbed and riddle is going to have Generic Anime Boy Voice#instead of the most over-the-top prim little benedict cumberbatch accent like he does in my HEART#and the world shall be poorer for it. alas.#i also think it would be VERY funny if malleus had a super exaggerated french accent because something something french fairytale#i am probably alone in this however#(sorry still trying to catch up on everything!)#(all of my focus has been going towards Deadlines so hopefully i will have space to think...eventually :')#(i still have some main story things cookin' and i JUST finished tsumsted 3: the squeakquel so uhhh)#(there may be a bit of a flood at some point. you've been warned.)
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Do yourself a favor and go read the entire fanfic work of @fanfoolishness
(In order: Under sun and shade, Blind Side, and Breathless (patching up is one of my fav too, I just had no cool sketch idea for it)
#star wars#star wars the bad batch#the bad batch fanart#tbb fanart#tbb fanfiction#dumping my “fanfic_doodles.clip” file here literally#sorry the style is messy#now I see them all Im like “ok it's all over the place zero/100 aesthetically pleasuring post”#hhhh its the thought that counts?#And tbh the point is just to convince you to read theses#because I'm like OBSSEEESSED with theses since you appeared in my notes#Every fic is gold#Me baiting my followers with pretty enough pictures to read fanfics#this being said I should really take the time to color properly my stuff#but I don't liiiiiiiiike it#there is tons of more talented artists if people want colored beautiful amazing art#me I can't really make my “”“spontaneous”“” “”“doodles”“” pretty without trying hard and at the end it's meh#They're so flat too#yesterday I was like “oh my scenes are becoming less flat I improved maybe”#Then I scrolled on my storyboard insta and was like#yeah sure no#I'm still faaaaaar away from the industry standards#I studied like at three arts school and I'm still bad at drawing TAT#why is my brain not working v_v#look brain I'm showing you nice pictures learn from them#brain: no Im gonna overfixate on this left hand here and only this#anyway
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me, a responsible being, working on the coding project as I should vs. me, a dysfunctional shithead, getting distracted by reading about brains (once aGAIN damnit (it's my favorite "I need to study my field but bc I should do that it's an impossible unthinkable feat now, so I'm reading about something else to fool my brain I'm still being productive"-topic))
#but after my thesis me & brains have been on a break bc got tired reading abt them during that (bc I had a topic that sorta allowed me to#sidetrack to brain stuff also) but seems I'm over the brain overload now#yay? i guess#also no one who actually studies medicine/brains/etc. yell at me abt wikipedia and like ''why are u studying that like that''#I'm just going through the wikipedia & reading article abstracts path; nothing serious#also my procrastination has reached inhuman levels like it's a full-time job now#bc I have like a chill week's worth of work to do and then I've done the courses for my bachelor's degree#but sending in that ''heyy i'm done with the courses let me graduate''-thing fills me up with sO MUCH anxiety & dread I'm working so slow#now (even tho couldn't send that in for like a month bc gotta first wait the courses to be graded and stuff so in actuality I should#not be slowing down even a bit bc I need to finally be done with this damn degree asap; gotta move on and should've ages ago (it's actually#super bad how late I'm with it (1.5 mf years jesus christ; I'm not even like a little bit proud abt getting a degree anymore like I'm sorta#just embarrassed if I have to tell ppl like ''yea I graduated'' bc dude ?? only now?? u were supposed to be done with that 1.5year#ago what have u been doing (fuck if I know) so I'm keeping it like ''if anyone asks'' basis)))#(the tags and parantheses started a life of their own lol sorry abt that)#studyblr#studyspo#bookblr#booklr#study#november 2024#2024
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imagine being kevin day, son of exy, born and bred to be a cog in the well-oiled machine that is the edgar allan ravens. all you know being the routine of practice and practice and practice and performance and victory alongside those you call brothers.
-and then one day you wake up in your estranged father's apartment between a bottle of painkillers and a bottle of vodka and there is a knot of bandages where your future used to be. you don't wake up at 4am anymore. you sleep until noon and vomit the remainders of life as you knew it into unfamiliar toilets. you watch orange and white clash against each other from sidelines you haven't touched since you started growing facial hair.
your brother doesn't ask you to come home. you would come if he asked. the days are longer here and the food is too rich. the colors are too harsh, the language barrier is too much. you speak and no one understands.
they feel sorry for you, but not for what you have lost, instead for what you have suffered. you try to show them what belonging means, to sever parts of yourself to fit inside a uniform, but they don't understand the necessity of the blade the way your brothers did. they don't understand that suffering feels religious if you do it right.
the therapist tells you it's survivor's guilt but the only survivors you can see are on the court in black and red and they read your eulogy after the game at a press conference. you are not a survivor in any way that matters anymore. how treacherous your heart is for continuing to beat when you can't even hold your lifeline in your hand without dropping it.
you want to go home but your key doesn't open the same door anymore. you want to sit beside your brother but there is no space on his side of the table. you want to be a raven but you are a fox.
you grieve for connection until there is a knife where your neck guard used to sit. you grieve for your life until a boy offers to show you how it feels to survive. you offer to show him how it feels to live. he tells you he won't sever parts of himself to fit the uniform, but there are telltale bloodstains in the fabric from long before you asked.
you wake up at 4am again. you take turns vomiting in the toilet, you when the alcohol level dips too low and him when his smile runs out. he doesn't speak your language but he understands it. he keeps the car running when you visit the therapist. he keeps an eye on your back to watch the 02 on your jersey turn orange. the colors don't seem as harsh anymore.
he offers you safety. he offers you belonging. he offers you the only thing he knows how to give, the only thing you know how to take.
he offers you a lifeline. you pick it up with your right hand.
#aftg#the foxhole court#tfc#kevin day#there is no-one in this world i love more than him#suffering feels religious quote by chelsea hodson#idk if this is a character study?#or what#i just think so often about how kevin is so unfairly represented in fic most of the time#like i'm SORRY that he wants things to function as intended#and i'm SORRY that he wants people to achieve their exy potential when that's all he's known to be valuable his entire life#kevin day is my boyfriend#and i love him#so WHAT#emetophobia#TW#emetophobia tw#i saw someone repost with this and i didnt ecven THINK i am so sorry i have added the tw
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Female Guidance in Aventurine's Life
One thing I haven't seen discussed in much depth yet, but which I think is especially interesting, is the consistency of female guidance in Aventurine's life: Every single person who we have seen on screen offering Aventurine assistance or making a positive difference in his life is female (with one exception, yes, I'll get there).
Under the read more cause it's longggg:
Before even diving into his family, let's just get the obvious out of the way: Aventurine is, at least supposedly, blessed by a goddess. The very origin of his good fortune--be it actual blessing or curse--comes from the literal "mother goddess" who watches over him. This is one of the only instances in Star Rail where a god character is specifically given a gender, and Gaiathra is not ever ambiguous. She is the classic female fertility goddess with all the trappings of other famous triple goddess figures of the real world. Aventurine's personal belief in the goddess may be shaky, but he nevertheless continues to treasure his people's faith. Thus, at the core, we can say Aventurine is a character who is guarded by the most quintessential mother figure possible.
Now, with the most obvious out of the way:
We know that Aventurine's father died before Aventurine was even born, and therefore he would not have any memories of his father, leaving him to be raised by his mother and sister.
Both women clearly made an enormous and lasting impression on Aventurine; they haunt every single one of his memories of Sigonia and are the key elements of the family Aventurine longs to return to. While he flirts with the concept of death as a way to see his family members again, it was also his mother and sister who instilled in him any sense of self-worth and meaning to his existence, the only things keeping him from giving up on living. His mother believed him to be blessed; his sister insisted to his face that not even the only remaining remnant of their mother had any value in comparison to his life.
It is for his sister that Aventurine first begins expressing a self-sacrificial nature, and from his sister that this self-sacrifice is reinforced when she uses herself as a shield to help him escape massacre at the hands of the Katicans.
It is also from his sister that Aventurine learns many of the deeply meaningful actions he holds onto to the present day, despite having been so far removed from his own culture.
Conversely, every one of Aventurine's early negative experiences on screen appear to have been driven (at least primarily) by men.
Although the Katican tribe of course would have both men and women, the tribal societies on Sigonia appear to be on the fairly traditional side, with Aventurine's mother staying at the camp with her child while his father was the one to go out and hunt for offerings for Gaiathra. This is also supported by Aventurine asking Jade to take him to her "chief" later on. Therefore, it is likely (although of course not guaranteed) that a majority of the Katicans' army was male, and that Aventurine's early experiences with outsiders consisted almost entirely of indiscriminate pillaging and massacre at the hands of what the Avgin viewed as savage, invading warriors. In separate instances, Aventurine was traumatized by these warrior figures three times--first with the loss of his father, then his mother, and then finally his sister.
And even their hope, supposed to come in the form of the "men in black" from the IPC, completely abandoned them, leaving Aventurine once again betrayed by masculine figures that were supposed to be there to protect him. Led by Oswaldo Schneider, another cruel male authority figure, the Marketing Department of the IPC permitted the wholesale slaughter of Aventurine's people--something which we know Aventurine is now aware of.
Then, of course, the next piece of Aventurine's backstory we're given is his male slave master. I don't really need to say anything about this, do I? This man violated Aventurine's human dignity and bodily autonomy, and forced Aventurine's hand in a life or death battle for which Aventurine still punishes himself mentally, even years in the future.
In part to escape the difficulty of his situation and rise to a position where he would have enough resources to--he thought--help his people, Aventurine joins up with the IPC. But when he attempts to make contact with a powerful man in the organization, Diamond, he is instead met by a woman, Jade, who against Aventurine's own expectations determines that she will raise Aventurine up (or use him as a tool, depending on how you currently choose to interpret Jade's motivations), granting him wealth and status beyond his imagination.
(And this line in particular is interesting, because you can take it one of two ways: 1) Aventurine comes from a patriarchal planet that traditionally put men into positions of power [thereby making his own slavery an emasculating act, aligning him further with disenfranchised women]; thus, he is making the assumption that to get anywhere in this organization, he will need to work with a man; or 2) He actually was counting on Jade taking his bet and helping him right from the beginning, because Aventurine perceives women as inherently more likely to protect and aid him than men would be.)
In the end, Jade does exactly as she claims she will, launching Aventurine into a position of power while also closing golden handcuffs around his wrists. She positions herself not only as his supervisor, but as his advocate and ally. She entrusts him with her Cornerstone, a sign of significant faith in his abilities. She even seems to be keenly aware of his bias towards the mother figure, referring to him as "child" in their conversations.
Whether this is genuine or a manipulation tactic can certainly be debated (and I'm not inclined to think at this point that Jade is a genuinely good role model or selflessly supportive person in Aventurine's life), but whatever the case, women are the only people Aventurine even remotely considers to be "in his corner."
We see this even earlier, in Aventurine's call to Topaz. Like with the example of his mother and sister, Aventurine trusts in Topaz's ability implicitly, and considers her above anyone else when it comes to completing the mission in Penacony.
Although of course we don't know if Aventurine has any other friends or allies among the Strategic Investment Department, it seems very likely that Topaz, yet another woman, is the one he is closest with. At the very least, she is the only IPC character (so far) that Aventurine has a complimentary voice line for, one that shows his respect for her talent:
Over and over again, the story aligns Aventurine with female figures in positions of authority, and demonstrates that he is comfortable (although maybe not too comfortable, in the case of Jade) with relying on them and trusting their judgment, just as he did with his mother and sister.
And this pretty much goes off the charts in Penacony, where Aventurine has more involvement with the female cast than virtually any other non-female character (even the Trailblazer!). We set the pattern off right away, with Aventurine immediately being placed into a negotiation situation with Himeko, respecting her role as the Express's leader and working to get himself aligned with the Express by acquiescing to her request for support.
Then there's the fact that Aventurine is the one who finds Robin's body, an event which, although he didn't let it show too much, was almost certainly traumatic for him, given the violent death of his own sister.
Next, twice in Penacony's story, we see Aventurine seek out Sparkle for information. He may not personally like her and her comments may be both racist and dehumanizing, but Aventurine does rely on her--being the only character explicitly seeking her aid, which no one else in Penacony seems to want.
In 2.0...
And in 2.1.
Now, say it with me, guys: Aventurine built an entire portion of his grand plan around the idea that if he looked pathetic enough, a female character would absolutely come and help him. And sure enough, the women come through for him, always! Sparkle gives him the exact last clue he needs to confirm his belief that he could use "Death" to reach the true Penacony, sealing the deal for the rest of his plan.
His plan which also hinged significantly on Black Swan's involvement too, another woman that he views as, if not trustworthy, then at least intelligent and hyper-competent.
Contrast all this, of course, with the treatment Aventurine receives at the hands of Sunday, the lone opposing male character he faces in Penacony.
Sparkle implies that Sunday would humiliate Aventurine in an unmistakably sexual and degrading way, and Sunday himself professes this same desire to see Aventurine humiliated.
Then we're "treated" to the moment in which Sunday uses the Harmony's (or perhaps actually the Order's?) power against Aventurine, in a scene which is supposed to reflect an interrogation but is also, very clearly, another nonconsensual violation of Aventurine's bodily autonomy and dignity by a man. While ostensibly seeking confirmation of the Cornerstone ruse, Sunday instead subjects Aventurine to unnecessary questions about his past on Sigonia, which recall and force Aventurine to re-endure memories of his trauma.
Even if this is what Aventurine prepared himself for and planned to have happen, the pain he experiences is very real, and he suffers both the physical and emotional consequences of Sunday's assault all the way up to his "Death" and possibly even beyond.
(Also, Sunday fans please don't get too up in arms with me for this; I also like Sunday! It's okay for characters to be morally grey!)
I think there's one other interesting example I would bring up here too, and that's Aventurine's conscious decision to weaponize his own masculinity against the Trailblazer. Through the 2.0 and 2.1 Trailblaze missions, Aventurine deliberately acts in an off-putting manner to the Astral Express crew, particularly the Trailblazer, in order to build up to the 2.1 climax where the Trailblazer is supposed to view him as an unrepentant villain and attack him without hesitation.
In order to achieve this uncomfortable, villainous effect, what does Aventurine do? Exactly what other men have done to him.
This is especially apparent if you're playing Stelle because of the ingrained societal taboo of a man entering a woman's personal space without consent, but even as Caelus, it is very clear that Aventurine is leveraging behaviors typically used to show dominance: In a complete 180 to all Aventurine's other body language in the game (normally quite withdrawn, frequently in defensive postures with his arms crossed or hand behind his back, almost always standing several feet away from other people), Aventurine violates the Trailblazer's personal bubble, looming over them (Caelus was sitting in this cutscene, lol), forcing eye contact, and commanding the space while informing them that they will have no choice.
For someone who was hunted, enslaved, had his movements restricted with chains, and due to his own slight stature has very likely been towered over by others who were intentionally asserting their power over him all his life, it is clear that Aventurine associates dominant, typically more masculine-coded physically-imposing behaviors with discomfort and even villainy.
Any girl who has ever had a man loom over her like this will realize very quickly: Aventurine wanted to make himself scary so he made himself act more like a bad man.
(Yes of course I know "not all men." I'm not saying every man behaves in this domineering way or that women cannot be domineering too, obviously, just that Aventurine had a very specific image in mind when constructing a "villainous persona," and the physically controlling tactics most typically used by aggressive men toward women was his immediate go-to.)
But where does that leave Dr. Ratio, the one male character actually on Aventurine's side?
Frankly, I don't want to derail my post about how intensely Hoyo chose to hammer on the message of "Women will protect you" in Aventurine's story with a discussion about a mlm ship, but the take-away here is going to lead in that direction anyway--so yes, Dr. Ratio is the exception.
What is interesting is that he does not come across as an exception at first, and in fact initially appears as another male character being rude and dismissive to Aventurine. Like, there are still people out there calling Ratio an unrepentant racist for this one.
Of course, it's later clarified that this is an act--likely even these insults were scripted specifically to give Sunday's spying ears the "insight" he needed to exploit Aventurine during the interrogation.
But even though it is an act, Aventurine still has noticeable trouble putting his faith in Ratio. He does genuinely doubt him a few times, despite knowing that they are working together to fool the Family.
Even his voice line about Ratio confirms that he doesn't think Ratio particularly cares for him; rather, he thinks Ratio simply tolerates him because he's slightly less unintelligent than those around them.
Ultimately, the entire act with Ratio ends up being a mirror of the real scenarios Aventurine has been experiencing with men his whole life (at least as far as we are shown his life). Men abandon him to fend for himself (unwillingly, like his father, or willingly, like Diamond leaving Aventurine to deal with Penacony alone on the inside). Ratio keeps leaving Aventurine completely alone. Men attempt to humiliate him and violate his boundaries (like Sunday and his slave master). Ratio insults Aventurine's appearance and intelligence repeatedly. Men betray him (like Oswaldo Schneider and his men leaving the Avgin to die). Ratio "betrays" him.
I'm not saying when Aventurine devised the plan for their act, he consciously drew up a list of all the ways men had hurt him in the past and had Ratio re-enact them one by one, but like... that's what happened, whether or not Aventurine intended it.
And okay, the shrinking scene in Dewlight Pavilion was just for fun and probably only slightly fetishy, the devs promise; yes, it was supposed to be a joke! ...But it's also not a mistake that this is yet another instance of a male character in a glaringly metaphorical position of power over Aventurine. Aventurine's tiny in this scene! He's completely vulnerable! He's in a dangerous position and the male character could very much hurt him in this moment.
But Ratio doesn't. (In fact, his line here is supposed to be sarcastic, very ha ha--but also, what is Ratio really saying? "I won't do anything to you without your express consent." What a good guy.)
Virtually everything negative that we see in 2.1 is Ratio doing these things as an act at Aventurine's own request. He doesn't actually disdain Aventurine; his own voiceline about Aventurine reinforces that he sees Aventurine as talented and intelligent.
Whatever you think he was apologizing for in their early scene, he's the only person we're ever shown in-game apologizing to Aventurine at all.
He worked hard to "betray" Aventurine but only as he was instructed to do, and immediately checks in on Aventurine's well-being afterward, even urging him to give up the plan if it becomes too much to handle.
And then, of course, there's the note: "Do stay alive. I wish you the best of luck."
After this point, it cannot be denied that Ratio is unequivocally on Aventurine's side, wants to help him, and is not doing so out of any sense of self-gain but largely because he is a good person who simply cares about Aventurine's fate. By the end of 2.1, it can no longer be doubted that Ratio is the exception to the "gender rule" of Aventurine's life, which--the story shows us again and again--was that guidance, protection, and care for Aventurine come from women, while men repeatedly represent dismissal, betrayal, or pain.
Ratio is, at least as far as Aventurine's story shows us, the proof that men can be good, that things are not as black and white in Aventurine's life as they might appear, and that--if you do choose to ship him with or see Aventurine as attracted to men--his attraction could be validated (and potentially reciprocated) by a male figure who would not bring additional harm to Aventurine's life. Aventurine makes the final decision to live after seeing Ratio's note--the exception to the rule ultimately proves to be the last piece needed to keep him alive.
But I promised I wasn't going to derail my own post about w o m e n, so let me get to the final point, and the one I really wanted to talk about: Although Ratio gets virtually all the credit for "saving" Aventurine in the fandom, Aventurine was actually saved by, you guessed it, another woman.
Not going to lie, the reason I started this post was specifically because I wanted to talk about how Acheron and Aventurine's dynamic was completely unexpected but actually fits flawlessly with the theme of feminine guidance in Aventurine's story.
Despite the fact that Aventurine made Acheron's life much harder and actively used her as a chip in his grand gamble, she doesn't blame or chastise him for those actions. Although she expresses some incredulity that Aventurine is actually that lucky, she then turns around and congratulations him for his ingenuity, immediately supporting him despite the fact that they don't even truly know each other.
Then it gets even more interesting. Acheron, who frequently hits her companions with deep and sometimes very emotionally fraught questions, asks Aventurine: "Have you never wavered?"
We as players know for a fact that Aventurine is constantly wavering, constantly doubting himself, his luck, and whether he'll even live--or even wants to live--to see tomorrow. But we also know that Aventurine is not forthcoming about those truths, refusing to express them to anyone, even himself. The only way we hear those dark truths is through his "future" self (who by the way, is once again another male figure cutting Aventurine down--of course it's himself but it's also, from the player's perspective, once again reinforcing the message that he isn't going to find safety or kindness in an adult male presence). Aventurine almost constantly deflects and diverts when his emotions or struggles are brought to the fore (unless he's divulging them for the specific purpose of allowing someone else to weaponize them). "I'm fine," he says, like a lying liar who lies.
But he doesn't lie to Acheron.
He chooses to be completely candid with her, to lance open the deepest wound of his life--that he can win and win and win and still have lost everything. The glitz and the glamour has all been stripped away here, at the end of everything, and Aventurine finally feels safe enough to admit that he fears he has absolutely nothing in his life worth living for.
And then, we get this direct parallel: Aventurine looks to Acheron, the woman now before him, for guidance, for explanation, exactly as he looked to his sister in the past.
He needs help, he needs answers, and he is continually seeking that help from the female figures in his life, whose support and kindness echo the lost care of his mother and sister.
"Go where you should be," Acheron tells Aventurine, guiding him across the river of death just as his sister insisted that he flee through the rain toward life.
Look guys, Acheron's even the one who reminds Aventurine to look at Ratio's note in the first place because apparently being an emanator of Nihility gives you x-ray vision, but my girl just gets no credit at all for being Aventurine's real savior, come on now!! Yes, Ratio's note was the final reminder Aventurine needed that someone would be waiting for him on the other side, but Aventurine would never have even gotten to the point of being willing to read that note if Acheron hadn't stepped in and provided him an answer to his question.
She feeds him back his own answer: "Why does life slumber? To rehearse the death for which we are not currently prepared." It is Acheron who reminds Aventurine that giving into the Nihility is pointless, and that rather than simply embracing a meaningless death, it is up to humanity itself to find and make meaning by living. It's this, not Ratio's note, that Aventurine gives as his reason for choosing to go on when asked by his own younger self. It's Acheron's words that finally give Aventurine an answer--why do we live just to die? Because there are people we can still make proud. Because when we go into death, we should do so with our heads held high, having achieved our own sense of purpose in this life.
Ratio gave Aventurine a promise: Someone is waiting for you to come back.
But Acheron gave Aventurine a reason: If life is inherently meaningless, doesn't that just mean you are free to give it meaning yourself?
She saved him, as women have been saving him all his life.
Anyway, this has already been horrendously long, but really what I wanted to say is that I think it is absolutely fascinating how consistent Aventurine's writing is when it comes to portraying where his support comes from and who he seeks guidance from. (Psst, just in case you still haven't figured it out, it's women!) In virtually every instance we are shown, we see the message reinforced that women are Aventurine's greatest allies and role models, while male figures are continually positioned to intentionally or unintentionally let him down and cause him distress.
"But women playing the supporting role to a male character is nothing new, Star, why are you so excited by this?"
Because the role women are playing in Aventurine's life is not the subservient supporter and emotional crutch role that female characters all too often play to male counterparts. None of the women in Penacony or Aventurine's past were there to do the emotional labor for him, to be a trophy or prize, or to cater to his needs. They don't exist solely to help him fulfill his character motivations; they aren't following him around waiting for his next request as their only role in the plot.
Instead, with Aventurine's story, we almost have an inversion of gender roles, where the male character eschews the stereotypical "men are leaders, fighters, and stoic heroes" archetype. Instead, no matter how hard he tries to hide it and keep a stiff upper lip, it is clear from 2.0-2.1's story that Aventurine is a deeply insecure, lonely, and explicitly traumatized survivor of genocide, slavery, and exploitation. Unlike most male characters, who are very rarely portrayed as genuine victims--because come on, shouldn't men be strong enough to fight back? Shouldn't men be able to shrug it off when they are hurt, emotionally or physically? (Of course I'm rolling my eyes here!)--Aventurine is belittled, humiliated, emasculated, and victimized on-screen, roles almost exclusively reserved for women, for whom surviving victimization in fiction is seen as noble.
Meanwhile, the women in Aventurine's life take on the roles traditionally given to male characters. They're both emotionally and physically his protectors. Aventurine's sister gave her life to guard his safety; Acheron ensured he could safely pass beyond the river of Nihility into the Primordial Dreamscape. They give him the tools necessary to succeed where he could not succeed on his own. His plan could never have gotten off the ground without Topaz and Jade entrusting their Cornerstones to him. The knowledge and capabilities of the women around him--not their "feminine charms"--are what allow them to help keep Aventurine on the right path even though he does waver. Even women who disrespect him, like Sparkle, still play a positive role in his life, able to provide him insight gained with their own intellect and talents.
When he has no one to rely on and doesn't know what to do, Aventurine is able to continually turn to the women around him, asking for and receiving not servitude or fawning, but their genuine wisdom and guidance.
tl;dr: If nobody else has him, Aventurine knows this random woman he met two minutes ago on the street will have him, because the women in his life literally never let him down.
(It's just so, so good, and ultimately, it should be very clear why Aventurine's story is as popular with women as it is! A+, Hoyo!)
#honkai star rail#aventurine#acheron#topaz hsr#honkai star rail meta#character analysis#there's a bit of#ratiorine#in here too#but mostly I ramble about WOMEN#thematic parallels#thematic parallels everywhere#it's long#I'm sorry but not really#sometimes you act like a normal fan#other times you're me#and write essays that wouldn't be out of place in gender studies class#also I hit the '30 images per post' limit and had to make do#please ignore the terrible merging I did of the photos#don't perceive my MS Paint job
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one of the posts on this website that haunts me is the one that claims neurotypicals instinctively know to read faster by reading the first and last paragraphs of an article and then skimming it if confused. I can't even begin to understand how someone would form such a bizarre belief.
#to be clear y'all it was specifically presented as a study hack i believe#not for like. the news#my teacher told us it for academic artilces which have intros summaries and conclusions#My teacher in COLLEGE literally taught us this today. It's a learned skill. for everyone.#also sorry for being controversial i did not expect or intend for this post to get popular#i did change the wording btw to be more clear if u saw a reblog#I said this#tumblr#neurotypical#neurodiversity#can you guys stop reblogging this i have all asks off but i'm getting afriad i accidently stepped on a hornet's nest with them and am about#to get a bazillion reblogs debunking every word i said or somehting#how is this still getting notes
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I used to get an arguments on facebook and it bit me in the ass enormously because it turns out that when you get an arguments on facebook habitually, you'll be interacting with a lot of other people who get an arguments on facebook habitually, and most of these people are deeply unpleasant and they will be super mean to you in really fucked up ways. so for a couple of years I just sort of dropped off ever interacting with anyone who said things that I did not agree with. I would just scroll past stuff or I would get upset about it privately and move on. I did not ever engage. and the last couple of weeks I've started being able to say things in response to things I don't agree with in ways that I feel lay out what my perspective is but do not get overly invested in "winning" or "proving" anything -- I will say my piece generally for the benefit of other people who might be reading the conversation and need to hear what I have to say. and then I will turn notifications off and go do something else.
anyway. wow. y'all heard about this? pretty cool shit.
#a friend of mine posted on her facebook page about the importance of pain management in dog behavioral problems#and some lady came in and started gnashing her teeth about pill popping and the opiate epidemic and 'masking pain'#and she was using her experience as someone who experiences chronic pain and who refuses to ever treat it.#as like a gotcha. I was just like I'm really sorry that you feel the need to deny yourself pain relief.#here is the scientific medical information that we have about the effect of untreated pain on the brain and the neurological system#here is information about how detrimental untreated pain is to the well-being of any organism#I think it would behoove you to look into some of the recent studies about this!#have a good day!#meanwhile she is like telling everyone to go screw themselves#which kinda proves my friend's point about untreated pain having a behavioral effect. ironically.#anyway
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I just want to say that I have joined the Agathario brainrot. 😭🖤💜💚🌈
#agatha all along#agathario#Agatha harkness#rio vidal#work in progress#procreate#study based on a painting based on a painting kind of not really#is Disney queer now#wow what a time to be alive#digital drawing#art study#sapphic love#love and death#i have been listening to His Infernal Majesty from like 20'years ago while drawing this it fits perfectly#razorblade romance#sorry I'm stressed from work aaa#also did you know that ALL OF THEIR CLOTHES HAVE PATTERNS??#blink and you've missed 20 of them
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not to get dramatic but one of copia’s dissociative translations in his troubled head was seeing sister imperator’s saucer of pills as a mug of tea and biscuits. he’s clearly an unreliable narrator who sees things we can’t trust to be true; going off of this, can we trust that the mug of tea he was handed before the encore was actually that? who’s got time to down a whole mug of hot tea when you’ve still got three songs to perform? isn’t it a strange beverage to give him out of all the other options? don't get me wrong i'm absolutely not being serious here (also not insinuating that copia is ill like seestor, i'm going down the psychological route) but what i'm saying is he could have been handed medication he didn't want to acknowledge
#what i'm saying is he has some issues#so treatment for that was also replaced by something innocent and nice#i'm nervous of posting stuff like this because i always worry people will misunderstand my intent (<- autism) so just to be clear#i am NOT saying that i think this could have been an intentional choice in the film#i'm just being silly#'the curtains are red' moment#i'm acting like a girl who did 3 months of a film studies qualification then had to drop it and get serious about stem#sorry this is another consequence of the insane temperatures in this country rn#i feel out of it#the band ghost#rite here rite now#papa emeritus iv#alsooo i know those shots are not strictly from his pov unlike those where he sees the normal chair / cat tree / tea & biscuits#again. not serious#cheers#posting post-friday-night-drinks or i will end up deleting this
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i only mean that it isn't typical/representative of that subgroup, i would ask the same thing if there was an asian kurd character
Did you take geography classes in the United States of America? Be honest now.
#i'm sorry for the stray @ americans but it had to be done#kurds are literally asian what the fuck are you talking about 😭#which continent do you think the middle east belongs to???#also “that subgroup” why are you talking like measurehead in my inbox???#doing a race science about my own people like??? lmao#it's giving Middle Eastern Studies major#please send me the info of your emergency contact so i can call them to do a wellness check on you#i'm not even mad this is genuinely so unhinged 💀#ask#anonymous
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YOU KNWO WHAT TIME IT IS!!! Merlin wips sharing time!
@lauravian @papysanzonew @artstelle @lemissingmask @artchael @chipinabag @knightswaypoint @starrieisdelusional @cadvix @verdiris @mr-merlin @irishyuri @msphagime @izzyghostsstuff @resu-w-ana @wowallnamesaregone @lamiascales @vi-visected @magicalmischel @places-across-time @alikat-art @kairennart @echolocalia @trinkh0rn @emberheartbeat @ispaintingcalmly @keyartie @worthyprnce @pyjamacryptid @kissme-withyour-cherrylipstick @miraimaym @butchjesus @whamber @gyrhs @guiltyscarlet @noodles-and-tea @mirrgred @hedgiestail @werewolf-transgenderism @schweet-arts
& everyone else, share a Merlin doodle or WIP ✨😍
#how fucking AMAZING it is that we are so many I can't even message each of you singularly today??#AND I'm missing people too!!#sorry to all I didn't manage to tag!!#bbc merlin#merlin#merlin fanart#IF U SEE THIS JOIN THE TRAIN!!!#this is like a conga line!!#get dancing with us or just hover on the side with your drink of choiche as we celebrate random merlin trend!!#sir percival#sir leon#doodle#it was a photo study ;)#mossmx art#ps ppl who are working on their finale art for the upcoming month#don't make us cry too much already XDDD#<<3<3<33<3<3<3
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jankris hug vs jance hug at ruisrock aka the part 2 to this post
#joker out#sorry this is ages after ruisrock but there's been a lot going on so i'm posting it now#jan peteh#nace jordan#kris guštin#jance#nat's gifs#took me way too long to find good angles of these ngl#but i got the idea from jo's footage#jankris is after ssol and jance is after tokio#the difference in softness between jance and the way they interact with the others needs to be studied huh#looks kinda like jan is gonna do the same bro hug thing with nace as with kris but nace is like absolutely not#it's the way they hold their guitars perfectly out of the way so they can hug properly
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my old blorbos are back in my brain
heart pirates my absolute beloved. shame theyre chillin somewhere in the ocean lol (do not mention the pre-time skip hats of penguin and shachi I'm still attached even tho its already been a million years since then)
anyway every time i remember that Law and Kid are assigned german and Scottish by Oda i gain one hundred years
#one piece#trafalgar law#heart pirates#penguin#shachi#kidlaw#weary sigh- i am never getting out of this place#OP has been in my brain since -checks watch- like 2016 I think? and there is no escape#like every few months this stupidass anime/manga just grabs my brain again for a month or so hdjkhkd#its terminal#anyway as a long time enjoyer of heart pirates-crys-hjdsfhkdhfk#i come back after a long time and this is the status update i get??? anyway fly high polar tang o7#btw if theres any mistakes in the german bits I'm sorry i did study german for a few years as my third language of choice but#im not super confident in it so hdsjfhk sorry#but the first bit with vergo is partly a reference to a meme that i saw some time ago and that completely took me out#and should translate i think into 'yea yea whatever. you wanker' and 'sorry. you(formal) wanker'#hajsdhkd#and the one with kid hopefully says 'oh yeah mirrors can be scary'#oh well and thats about it cheers#id say read one piece but actually dont its at 1088 chapters now#and just the catching up that i did in the past few days absolutely took me out lmao#but hey this is prolly my oldest going-on fandom that i still feel the need to come back from time to time lol o7
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Hi, how did you learn to draw Steve's physique?
Ohh what a complicated thing to answer...
When it comes to how I learned to draw anything, it's hard to say anything too specific since it's always a culmination of many years of assorted study and practice... but I can try to do my best to explain some of the biggest things that helped me learn, some tips I keep in mind, and maybe at least some places to start/delve further.
(just a little disclaimer it's not like my drawings here are going to be 100% medically accurate.. they're just to illustrate concepts!)
The main thing about learning various physiques is understanding anatomy. Which feels obvious, but I don't mean proportions; these are important, but perhaps more important is understanding the skeleton and how it moves and learning where muscles connect to bones and where fat grows on the body. When you understand how these function on a more mechanical level, depicting form and movement in a way that feels natural comes in tow.
For instance, understanding things like the pronation and supination of the radius and ulna, as well as the fact that muscles can ONLY contract or relax, will help you understand a bit better which muscles will be flexed and which will not while someone moves. It's inherent to the positioning based on the structural makeup of the body... It's not like you NEED to memorize all the muscles and bones, of course, but understanding and gaining at least a passive familiarity with the concepts really helps.
In tandem with this concept is the way parts of the body flow into eachother. Muscles ALWAYS come in groups because they can only contract. Whatever muscle is there to lift something, there is a muscle on the other side to pull that bone back down. What this results in is a series of straight edges next to curves, which gives us a lot of really lovely "s curves" and dents and folds and so on and so forth just naturally occurring.
I would suggest at least learning the "bony landmarks", which are bones (usually) visible on the surface of the body. things like the iliac crest, the great trochanter, the 7th vertabrae, the acromion process... These can be used to help you understand the parts of the body as angles and relationships, rather than trying to remember lengths and sizes, which vary immensely... (since you asked about steve, he can be our model... also study these on your own don't just take my word for it haha, these are the ones I personally keep in mind)
I've done the same thing with body hair... learning where it grows and in which directions... It helps me make up variations without needing reference, because I have a set of rules I can follow.
The biggest thing that helped me understand all this on a much deeper level was my ecorche course. I sculpted this guy. We started by sculpting the entire skeleton to understand the bones, and then we added muscles on top. Not every single muscle, of course, but the "artistic muscles" AKA the ones which directly affect the surface of the body. Doing this let us see where muscles connect, because we would make a shape, put it on the bone where it actually goes, and then you get to see how other muscles overlap that.
This helped me, perhaps, more than anything else. But I also didn't just start with this course, I had been drawing for years before I even took it. I had been in school for years before I took it. Not that I think it wouldn't be helpful to someone just starting out, but I do think that the more you know going in, the better an in-depth course like this will help you and stick with you. Classes are also expensive, though so I'm not really like... recommending you pay potentially thousands of dollars to take one... But it did help me a lot, personally.
I also, of course, have done many figure, gesture, and master studies...
These just help you quickly gain a stronger understanding of generalized anatomy, and gives you real life examples of and practice with of how people move and balance.
What all this does when combined, is gives me a very solid ability to depict movement and form in a way that feels relatively natural from my subconscious without the need for reference.
The rest of how I've learned to draw his physique is honestly mostly just stylization. I understand the body, and this is how I am depicting it for his level of musculature.
And as I move into depicting him in other ways, either moving in comics or in animation, realistically rendered, or extra stylized, these concepts inform every step of that process for me! When he keeps the same/similar relationships between parts, he gets to still look like himself.
It ALSO really helps when putting clothes on, because the way cloth falls and bunches and lifts is all directly related to the form it is on... So the more you understand that form, the more you can depict clothing and movement in a way that feels natural.
This is all, of course, true when I draw anyone, you asked about Steve so I'm trying to mostly show with him! But because I'm just drawing from raw information of general anatomy rather than trying to study one body type at a time, it allows a lot more "give," I think!
Like, here's most of the cast from TTA so far... actually, they're not as varied as I thought they were nevermind LMAO ignore this part
But, it also makes monster and alien design much easier! It's a lot easier to come up with non-human anatomy when I understand human anatomy, because I can manipulate the knowledge I have...
There is infinite more to study in the world of anatomy... The complexity of the human body goes extremely deep. For our purposes as artists, we need only depict a fraction of it, but more information rarely hurts the process.
I'm sure there's something in here that's wrong on a technical level, I'm mostly going off of memory. But that's kind of my point - I understand enough generally and conceptually that when I am missing something and need to find reference for it, I understand what I'm looking at. It's much easier than trying to learn AND draw at the same time.
I hope even one thing in here helped you! Sorry it's so long.
#asks#somewhereinasgard#anatomy#art tips#anatomy tips#don't like... take my word as gospel OF COURSE#I am sure there's like one thing or more in here that's like. genuinely wrong#but whatever#anyways. I love steve LMFAO#I was thinking about zagan a lot too in this one tbh LMAOOOO cause he's got a similar body type#and when I just did that action animation of him#and people were like how the fuck did you do this so fast#I sort of have been realizing all this knowledge I have about anatomy#and how much easier it makes my life pretty much every single step of the way.#those action poses did not need reference.#I almost never need reference for drawing people#unless its like... realism. but I mean in my comics or animations#when the arm is coming towards the camera I know what's going on in the arm and what the form of it ACTUALLY is so I can properly draw it#there's no guesswork. I know what I'm doing.#which makes it so that when I'm depicting someone like flipping all around or whatever#I just know what the body looks like. how it moves. how it balances. etc.#I would say it comes naturally to me but it doesnt.#it is subconscious at this point#but it is very extremely studied#not a damn bit of this came out of nowhere LOL#ok anyways this was a really fun ask#I got extremely carried away I am so sorry#this is like my biggest artistic passion I LOVE anatomy SO much#I love drawing muscles#I love the technical feelings that happens in my brain when I draw an arm moving and figure out how the muscles are engaged
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