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just-some-random-blogger · 2 years ago

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meowmeow, sweety! 'you gave yourself away' you dont think these were accidents, dont you?) im glad to be here too. a little uncomfy though bc i still feel like im scamming your subs TT bc usually just some people who just send messages r anons and those who have at least ups r some bloggers. but alright. pathetic man evil meow meow TT yeah we love him. 'i’ll even distort reality if i have to' tbh sounds like a good fic idea for me... 'its more of a compliment to viserys' yk i also was confused when vissy called daemon 'son'. i was WTF. bc while its understandable why daemon acts like that, why vissy acts like this?? esp if the difference between them is 4 years (idk but you said 'too' so ig so?)? at first i even thought maybe its a twisted dream of daemon TT 'everyone deserves love even stinky daemon' FUCK GHDKFHFJ i meant to write he thinks he does NOT deserve love (thats why neither from wife nor). HGJDF my sleepy mind just read the previous not as the negative and was like in english they dont say that so no. so silly TT like daemon seeks hes brother approval (thought he gives it to him in a way), he insists that his WIFE hates him (though she still took a ring and made wedding promises), he REEKS of insecurities abt not deserving love. 'FOR YOU FOR NOTICING' dont forget i passed an exam where you dont have right answers you just analyse the texts and write 5 essays. i notice too much. not always write abt it (bc ive been writing these 2 replies for 3? hours or so) but always notice. 'even tho ur siblingless' im siblingless but not eyeless? mindless? 5 essays girl. 'DONT APOLOGIZE' i remember how you enjoyed my first expressive reply so im sorry i cant give you these emotions anymore( 'a very specific reason i added it in the first place' 😶 TUMBLR DONT LET ME PUT THIS STUNNED EMOJI WITH THE HAND BUT NO BLUSH. nvm. will the dragons' skeletons regain muscles and soft tissues and become real or will oberyn martell come to life out of his coat? 'ITS A FANFIC BUT ITS NOT' HAJSJD catmom youre so mean. AND how come you promise to watch tlou but dont watch doctor who😡 youre so cruel and dont like me and matt smith and good plot and twisted timelines. 'something so deeply intimate' yeah absolutely understand. i nave a specific form of my name which can make me literally cry when called. 'he would 100% make a shrine for her and worship the ground she walks on' he better make it up for her for waiting for 2000 years for him. 'NOW I WANNA WRITE SOME AEMOND FICS' NOT hinting on that idea with the hades and persephone, no, ABSOLUTELY NOT😶 are these 2 kitties aemond and aegon while investigating? gsdjmlsk 'HELP ME THAT WAS SO BEAUTIFULLY AND BREIFLY PUT' ooh thanks. hope its a compliment. also. ive just thought. i can see daemons horniness as not so real desire to have sex with he reader but to feel her closer and get some familiar and more tangible confirmation of their love, bond and her not going away. makes sense. 'to be super tender and sweet and full of love' YES! big brains think the same! absolutely yes! in this case its essential! although all dominant daemon is hot, i can imagine him being subby more often than anyone wants to agree and also so pretty. SORRY i got distracted. i can see him as the type to just kiss readers shoulder/neck/arm/any bare skin he can see whenever he can to just feel her and confirm that shes with him, not leaving him, not always sexually. 'if you dont feel comfy reading smut if i do write it just skip it' 1) thanks for caring abt me🥺 2) i reblogged frost bite... girl... 'I 100% MEANT' OMG TT no but imagine him calling reader 'my queen' in a hushed voice during the wedding night and in high valyrian bc its still a treason but shes HIS Majestic Eternal Wife. i really wanted to make it short but got carried away so pt 2 again. sorry TT

idk what his cat is doing so silly HAHHAH

HELLLOOOOOOO

meowmeow, sweety! 'you gave yourself away' you dont think these were accidents, dont you?)

well i just thought 'oh well i know who she is now'

im glad to be here too.

a little uncomfy though bc i still feel like im scamming your subs TT bc usually just some people who just send messages r anons and those who have at least ups r some bloggers. but alright.

scamming my subs? first of all what? subs? is this youtube? i- no one is being scammed ??? you can send me as many messages as you want. also 'at least ups r some bloggers' i dont know what you mean T_T

pathetic man evil meow meow TT yeah we love him.

HAHAH

'i’ll even distort reality if i have to' tbh sounds like a good fic idea for me...

/: i mean its what happening to THIS fic so HAHAH

'its more of a compliment to viserys' yk i also was confused when vissy called daemon 'son'. i was WTF. bc while its understandable why daemon acts like that, why vissy acts like this?? esp if the difference between them is 4 years (idk but you said 'too' so ig so?)? at first i even thought maybe its a twisted dream of daemon TT

no T_T it wasn't viserys calling him son wasn't him trying to say 'oh im older than you and this is our dynamic, father and child' it was more like, he froze because daemon thinks he's their dad and so he's just pretending to be who daemon thinks he is so that #1, he'll get the closure he wants in this moment, #2 he'll listen to what he'll say, #3 it's easier to go with it rather than tryna explain smth to a drunk man. i guess that part wasnt very clear. i thought people might confuse his intention there and i was right T_T it be like that its ok it was too next level and i knew it

'everyone deserves love even stinky daemon' FUCK GHDKFHFJ i meant to write he thinks he does NOT deserve love (thats why neither from wife nor). HGJDF my sleepy mind just read the previous not as the negative and was like in english they dont say that so no.

ah i see HAHAHA that makes more sense AHAHAAHHA he is looking for love everywhere T_T its ok ur sleepy mind mind needed sleep sleep

so silly TT like daemon seeks hes brother approval (thought he gives it to him in a way), he insists that his WIFE hates him (though she still took a ring and made wedding promises), he REEKS of insecurities abt not deserving love.

HE DOES HES A PATHETIC LIL WET CAT WHOS SO INSECURE WITH HIS DADDY ISSUES

'FOR YOU FOR NOTICING' dont forget i passed an exam where you dont have right answers you just analyse the texts and write 5 essays. i notice too much. not always write abt it (bc ive been writing these 2 replies for 3? hours or so) but always notice.

T_T HELP THE EFFORT YOU TOOK FOR ME I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOU SO MUCH MY LOVE MY HEART MY SOUL

'even tho ur siblingless' im siblingless but not eyeless? mindless? 5 essays girl.

HAHHAHAHAHA OK HAHAHHAHAHAHA

'DONT APOLOGIZE' i remember how you enjoyed my first expressive reply so im sorry i cant give you these emotions anymore

T_T im touched you remember. im just glad to get anything you are willing to give my love <3

( 'a very specific reason i added it in the first place' 😶 TUMBLR DONT LET ME PUT THIS STUNNED EMOJI WITH THE HAND BUT NO BLUSH. nvm. will the dragons' skeletons regain muscles and soft tissues and become real or will oberyn martell come to life out of his coat?

HELP ??? WHAT HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH no no it's nothing like that... or is it HAAHH

'ITS A FANFIC BUT ITS NOT' HAJSJD catmom youre so mean.

HAHAHAHAH its what she deserves for making get into pedro pascal

AND how come you promise to watch tlou but dont watch doctor who😡 youre so cruel and dont like me and matt smith and good plot and twisted timelines.

T_T i only agreed to watch 1 episode. ive watched 3 episodes for doctor who! i love you and i also🤢love🤢matt smith but taking on doctor who is so much more daunting than that zombie flic. and again i'll only watch 1 ep. if its tHAT good then i'll watch more

'something so deeply intimate' yeah absolutely understand. i nave a specific form of my name which can make me literally cry when called.

see 😩

'he would 100% make a shrine for her and worship the ground she walks on' he better make it up for her for waiting for 2000 years for him.

ASHFHE:LFHEF ??? BUT THAT WASNT HIS FAULT T_T H:ASFHLAKSHFKALSFH AFHASLFHALSFHAFH SO MEAN TO DAEMON AND FOR WHAT HAHAHHAH DESERVE

'NOW I WANNA WRITE SOME AEMOND FICS' NOT hinting on that idea with the hades and persephone, no, ABSOLUTELY NOT😶

omg i forgot about that!! we'll see. i have some aemonf reqs collecting dust in my queue so lol HAD:HASDAS i might do those first

are these 2 kitties aemond and aegon while investigating? gsdjmlsk

SFDHKAFHAFHASF OMG MAYBE HAHAHAHAH CUTIES

'HELP ME THAT WAS SO BEAUTIFULLY AND BREIFLY PUT' ooh thanks. hope its a compliment.

IT IS A COMPLIMENT IT IS A COMPLIMENT I LOVE THE IMAGREY YOU MADE FOR EVERYTHING T_T UGH I THINK YES I THINK SERVING I THINK SLAY

also. ive just thought. i can see daemons horniness as not so real desire to have sex with he reader but to feel her closer and get some familiar and more tangible confirmation of their love, bond and her not going away. makes sense.

youre SO SO SOSO RIGHT HES SUCH A SIMP AND PATHETIC AND STUPID AND I LOVE THAT IN A MAN

'to be super tender and sweet and full of love' YES! big brains think the same! absolutely yes! in this case its essential! although all dominant daemon is hot, i can imagine him being subby more often than anyone wants to agree and also so pretty.

;KDFGHLKHG;LKDHSGDK YUM YUM I LOVE THAT SO MUCH ;SAHGF;LHASD;FHAS;LDKFHADS;LKFHASD;KLFGHDAS;FLKGHASDF;GADFL;KJASDGF;KJSDAGF;KSDAJFGSAD;KFJD NOT ME WANTING TO SKIP EVERYTHING AND JUST WRITE THAT SKDF;SKFG;SKFGKFGSDKFFK;GF;SAFG;SADKFGAS;FGSADF;

SORRY i got distracted. i can see him as the type to just kiss readers shoulder/neck/arm/any bare skin he can see whenever he can to just feel her and confirm that shes with him, not leaving him, not always sexually.

YOU AND ME BOTH JUST THIS ^^^^^ THIS EVERYTHING THIS^^^^

'if you dont feel comfy reading smut if i do write it just skip it' 1) thanks for caring abt me🥺 2) i reblogged frost bite... girl...

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH IM LAUGHING SO HARD OK AHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH

'I 100% MEANT' OMG TT no but imagine him calling reader 'my queen' in a hushed voice during the wedding night and in high valyrian bc its still a treason but shes HIS Majestic Eternal Wife.

;SKLFH;SDHFSDHHAHD;AHSDAHDADASDH WHAT DO YOU MEAN IN A HUSHED VOICE MANS ABOUT TO SAY MY QUEEN IN HIS VOWS ON MIC WITH THE SPEAKERS ON MAX IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE WORLD FUCK TREASON HE LOVES AEMMA SO MUCH AND WOULD KILL FOR HER BUT YN IS

HIS QUEEN

AND AINT NO ONE ABOUT TO GET IT TWISTED HE WOULD COMMIT THE MOST UNHOLY OF CRIMES FOR HER AND THATS ON PERIOD

i really wanted to make it short but got carried away so pt 2 again. sorry TT

DONT EVEN APOLOGIZE IM HAVING SO MUCH FUN but i do have to finish my homework and do laundry so i might read your other messages later

xxx

i love you thank you so much for this response. i hope you are doing well

#slavyanskiyahui cutie #anon ask #my beloved anons #modern!daemon anon #ask #modern!daemon nonnie

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myshawningstar · 4 years ago

Text

My Morphine

Summary: You are driving home from work one day in a rainstorm and lose control of your car. The world goes dark and when you open your eyes again you are greeted with a beautiful sight in front of you.

Word Count:

Request: “can u do a doctor! shawn fic? ur amazing bye ❤️”

Warnings: Mentions of blood, broken bones and car crashes as well as medical procedures.

Your car jerks, wheels gliding along the thin layer of water between your car and the road. You hated driving in rainstorms as you always had the fear of hydroplaning, yet here you were doing just that. You knew there wasn’t much you could do in this situation. You knew the only thing could do when hydroplaning was take your foot off the gas, keep your steering wheel as straight as possible, and try to slow down without using your brakes. Unfortunately for you, you were currently at the top of a hill driving down, so this only made your car pick up speed. At the bottom of the hill was a three-way intersection.

You were only a few blocks from home, a small apartment that you just recently moved into. As your car approached the intersection at the bottom of the hill, you decided that it was best if you just coasted through it; so you did. As you reached the intersection, there was a young woman crossing the street who happened to be in the course of your car. Your eyes widened, you were going to hit the poor girl if you didn’t do something. You let your instincts take over as you slammed on your brakes, steering away from the woman.

Big mistake.

You almost immediately lost control of your car as it swerved towards a lamp post, the momentum from the turn almost causing your car to flip. There’s a loud crunching, something hits you in the back of the head, and glass shatters as you are jarred to a very sudden stop. The world is spinning around you, your vision is blurred, your head hurts but it’s nothing compared to the pain shooting through your leg. You glance down to see blood all over your jeans.

“Are you okay?” The woman called, though her voice was practically drowned out by a loud ringing in your ears.

You open up your mouth to respond when you hear a loud, bloodcurdling scream. You looked around to try to figure out where the noise was coming from, but it was only then that you realized that the scream was coming from your own mouth.

“It’ll be okay, I’m going to call an ambulance!” The woman yelled over your screams.

You feel hot, wet tears falling from your eyes as you let the pain and frustration get to you. There’s a bittersweet smell filling the air around you, suddenly you can’t breathe. It was a suffocating, sickeningly sweet smell. You knew that smell. It was Brad fluid leaking from your car. Your heart begins to race, you’re terrified that this was the end. This was how you die, in a flipped car, asphyxiated on chemical fumes and bleeding out. You pass out, the smell and the pain from your leg overwhelming you.

��

When you’re pulled into consciousness again, it’s when you hear the sound of the sirens bouncing off the walls of the large brick building in the ambulance bay of the hospital. You practically force your eyes open slightly as the doors to the ambulance open. The flashing lights from the ambulance hurt your barely open eyes and you shut them, wishing they would stop.

Once you had finally managed to block out the noise of the sirens, you could hear a voice. By the way he was speaking, you could safely assume he was a paramedic.

“Jane Doe, looks to be around her 20’s. She lost control of her car and crashed into a traffic light.” He reported.

“What’s her stats like?” A different voice spoke. This had to be a doctor, you could tell by the way he had taken control of the situation.

“Her bpm is 78 over 80, she’s been in and out of consciousness, and there’s uneven breath sounds on the left side.” The paramedic answered.

“Thank you. Page ortho!” The man called.

That’s when you saw him. The person who the voice belonged to. He was beautiful, like a Greek god.

“Let’s get her to trauma one!”

He was a tall young man with loose, brown curly hair. His face was gorgeous, sharp jawline, brown eyes, huge, yet concerned, smile. He was like a walking cliche of a hot doctor on a medical show. He has on black scrubs with a long sleeve white shirt rolled up to his elbows underneath. There is a stethoscope around his neck and a pen poking out of his pocket that was located on his peck. He doesn’t look any older then twenty five, which was only a few years older then yourself. You quickly realized you were staring, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to look away. He was like the real life version of Dr. McDreamy!

“Hey there, I’m Doctor Mendes.” Said the man with the god-like complexion. It was only then that you realized that you were no longer outside the hospital, instead you were inside a room. There were multiple doctors moving about the room, but your eyes only followed one. “You’re at New Eden Medical Center, we’re going to take care of you sweetheart.” Doctor Mendes spoke once again.

You felt your heart flutter in your chest as he spoke, he called you sweetheart. You opened your mouth, gathering every bit of strength you could muster and spoke. “Y/n.. L- L/n.”

“What’s happening? Her heart rate just shot through the roof!” A different man said.

“I can’t stop this bleeding, she’s losing a lot of blood.”

“We need to get her to surgery, stat!”

The room around you seemed fuzzy, it got darker every second. You fought to keep your eyes open as a loud, annoying buzzing sound was in your ear, almost like a heart flatlining. You didn’t want to see the beautiful man leave, but evidently, you gave in to the darkness.

—

When you returned to consciousness, you were greeted by a bright light, along with the sound of a loud, steady beeping, almost like an alarm clock.

Your eyes were heavy, and you struggled to keep them open, you didn’t know where you were. This wasn’t your house, this wasn’t your bed. Where the hell were you?!

You began to panic, looking around the room. There was a small tv in the corner, a chair next to the bed you were in. You quickly came to the conclusion that it was a hospital room. Your eyes shot towards the door as you heard footsteps approach.

“Hey there- you gave me quite a scare.”

You recognized the man immediately, your heart thudding in your chest as you looked at him. As a result, the beeping from the heart monitor you had been hooked up to quickened.

“Woah, woah. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you Y/n.” The Doctor McDreamy remake walked over to you and rested his hand on your shoulder.

“Holy shit.. you’re really hot.” You said before you had a chance to think about it.

He chuckled. “I see the meds haven’t worn off yet.” He smiled. “It’s good to see that you’re able to speak.”

“Why wouldn’t I be able to?” You asked.

“Well, we had to preform CPR, so I’d imagine your chest is sore.”

You stayed quiet for a second. He wasn’t wrong, your chest did hurt a bit, but that seemed to be the only thing you could really feel. “What happened to me?”

“You got into a crash. You’ve broken your femur, and a few of your ribs. You also have a minor concussion, but that’s all, other than your cuts and bruises.” Dr. Mendes told you.

You nodded, processing everything he had told you. It was a lot to take in.

“Do you have anyone we can call?” He asked.

You shook your head. “No.. I’m alone.”

What you said was true; you were alone. As a child you spent your life in foster homes, waiting for the day when someone would finally adopt you; but it never came. You had moved just over a week ago to this town, and you knew no one. You were alone.

Dr. Mendes frowned, nodding slightly as he sat on the edge of your bed, gently resting his hand on your shoulder.

“I’m sorry to hear that. But I want you to know that you’re not alone. You have me.”

You let out a hollow laugh, tears filling your eyes. “I don’t even know you.” You whispered, letting the silent tears roll down your cheeks.

“I’m Shawn Mendes. I’m one of the best surgeons here at New Eden Medical Center.” Shawn told you. “Now, you may not know me well, but you know me.” He smiled reassuringly.

“I just want to go home.” You cried softly, shaking your head as you looked down.

“Hey, hey, listen to me.” Shawn spoke softly, his hand sat gently under your chin as he tilted your head up to look at him. “I know you want to go home.” He soothed. “We just need to keep you here for a few more days for surveillance, then I’ll take you home myself.” He promised.

“Isn’t that against some sort of doctor code or something..?” You sniffled.

Shawn chuckled, cupping your face in his large, calloused hands as he wiped away your tears with his thumbs.

“It is, yes. But you said yourself, you have no one, or rather, you had no one. Now you have me.”

“But what about your jo-..”

“I’ll have to transfer off your case, but I’ll be in here every second I can be. Okay?” Shawn seemed to know what you were going to say before you even finished.

“Okay..” You nodded slightly, relaxing in the man’s arms.

“Now, you should get some rest. You need it.” Shawn smiled as he slowly pulling his hands away from your face.

“Will you be here when I wake up?” You asked worriedly, not wanting to be alone again.

“Of course.”

That’s all the confirmation you needed, you smiled as you shut your eyes, sighing softly as you relaxed in the bed. “Thank you, Shawn.” You whispered.

“Of course. It’s my job.”

That was the last thing you heard before you drifted off to sleep.

#shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes x y/n #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes x you #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes fanfics #shawn mendes fluff #shawn mendes series #doctor!au #doctor!mendes #doctor shawn mendes #car crash

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tf2hcs · 5 years ago

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can i get uhhhhhhh.. trans merc head canons?? maybe found family?? thanks!

you can DEFINITELY get trans merc headcanons. comin up hot. i have so many headcanons pertaining to the mercs being trans that i can’t fit them into one post, so i’m just gonna do stuff related to transitioning here, and if you wanna hear about how i think they realized they’re trans or came out, ill do a post about that too

Soldier:

you know how cis people think that you have dysphoria ur whole life and then you get The Surgery (The Surgery) and it all goes away that very day? and that’s just. it? solider is the only person on earth for whom that holds true

he has rod-insert phalloplasty and double incision top surgery

Jane Doe is actually his real birth name, it doesn’t give him dysphoria so he just kept it

his phalloplasty used his arm as the donor site, so he’s got a patch of pinkish skin on his left arm

he transitioned pretty early on, maybe in his early twenties. he’s known he’s trans since he was a kid

shaving gives him INTENSE gender euphoria

Scout:

he just went on T and boy is he excited

he runs in his binder (dumb) and frequently binds with bandages (dumb), so he has at least one deformed rib. twinsies

like as SOON as he finds out medic is trans he asks for top surgery & gets it. he gets periareolar top surgery

when medic explains to him that periareolar top surgery keeps nipple sensation intact but double incision doesn’t he immediately starts calling the other mercs “numb-nips”

“it’s my shot day someone come stab me in the așs”

he didn’t choose his own name, his mom chose it for him when he came out. if he chose it it would’ve CLEARLY been tommy, as a tribute to tom jones

Medic:

double incision top surgery

i know this is wildly unrealistic but it’s tf2 so i will claim it. medic gave himself top surgery and instead of giving himself nipple grafts he just like, carved a smiley face and star of david on there

he knows the most about trans health and history out of all the mercs (partially because he’s old, partially because he’s a doctor, partially because he’s more involved in the community than the others)

because of this the other mercs come to him for help with trans issues a lot

he wants to have a baby biologically SO bad. so so bad. i think i get this headcanon from how lovingly he holds that baboon baby in the comics

he works really hard to preserve his fertility throughout his transition and as he gets older. he doesn’t end up being able to have a baby until he’s in his 50s but he’s so happy when he does

i could go off about my dad medic headcanons for hours but ill save that for another post if u guys request

Demo:

double incision top surgery for this guy too

talks about being trans all the time (every time i watch meet the demo and he says “i got a manky eye, i’m a black scottish cyclops” i mentally add transgender to the list)

constantly jokes about how he “blew it off” (you know what “it” is)

he has relatively bad dysphoria his entire life, but being open about it really helps

he doesn’t even know soldier is trans until he asks about the skin graft on his arm. he sees him use his rod implant and he just accepts that that’s how penises work

you know how being skilled with explosives runs in the degroot family?? my personal headcanon is that transness is also genetic to the degroots. both of demo’s parents were trans. ill talk about this more in another post if u guys want

Heavy:

no top surgery, his chest is a little large compared to a cis guy’s but his overall size makes it look more normal

if he ever does get top surgery, though, he gets inverted T/anchor incision

he has PCOS. he got a hysterectomy when medic was rooting around in there for the first time and noticed the cysts (”there will be so much more room in here once we get rid of your uterus!!” “room for what?” “…oh, you know”)

i think he might get full meta?? (as in metoidioplasty) i cant decide if he’d want a vaginectomy though. help me decide

Spy:

double incision top surgery. he paid top dollar for it, it’s very nicely done

he refers to his top surgery as a “mastectomy” (which is the correct term but like, who says that)

he gave birth to scout. he was pregnant when he met scout’s mom, and after he gave birth to scout he ended up leaving him with her. i cant decide if it was more of a “can you please take my baby” situation or a “im going to the store to get milk” situation. either way though i don’t think scout’s mom would’ve objected to keeping him, he was an adorable baby

he owns so many packers. he gets them custom made. he has them displayed in his closet like designer wigs

Sniper:

no surgery at all! he never plans on getting it either. that’s why he has the vest

his chest is like, small and somewhat muscular. you guys have seen skinny trans men with muscle tîtty before i don’t have to explain this to you

actually i want you to take this discord screenshot. i said this last thursday

he’s one of the most obviously trans mercs because he just insists on dressing like he based his outfit off the wikihow article for how to pass as male

i can say a lot more about my trans hcs for sniper in another post but im trying to keep this one at a readable length (failed step one)

Engineer:

no top surgery!

i think he has simple meta or maybe full meta without a vaginectomy (*epic rap battles of history voice* you decide)

he transitioned much later in life than the other mercs, his transition only actually started like five years ago

Pyro:

they’re agender!!

AFAB with no surgery or HRT

they use they/them pronouns or alternating he/she (”he’s not here, is she?”)

there’s not much to say about pyro’s gender! they just don’t have one

OH HOLY SHIT DO THE MERCS THROW THEM A GENDER REVEAL PARTY

ASKFLDLJSDKFLJDSFLKSDJFDLSKFJLSK

BONUS

Miss Pauling:

you know how when some trans women start hrt, they get really bad cravings for pickles? miss p has that like hell

she eats a hot pickle in her car every single day. it gets to the point where the people who work the graveyard shift at mcdonalds remember her (she has a habit of ordering “a fry container full of pickle slices”)

she takes estrogen but she doesn’t have any surgery! i dont think she ever gets any

scout very nervously explains to her that he’s trans at one point and all she can do is blink and say “did you think i was cis”

thank you for taking this journey with me. now imagine how long this list would’ve been if i didn’t narrow it down

#Anonymous #tf2 #team fortress 2 #soldier tf2 #scout tf2 #medic tf2 #demoman tf2 #sniper tf2 #pyro tf2 #miss pauling #engineer tf2 #spy tf2 #heavy tf2 #headcanons #trans rights #long post #ask to tag #the holy grail of tf2 trans rights.

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vanchlo · 4 years ago

Text

The Partner / Chapter Twelve, "The Resolute"

Word Count: 8.4k / Story Masterlist / Read The Assistant / Read on Wattpad / Song: Hold Me While You Wait by Lewis Capaldi (click to listen) / Warning: Sensitive and upsetting topics, such as death, grief, and miscarriage

"I never know when I will miss you. I can't ever predict just what will grip my heart with the reminder that you are gone. It could be anything. Anytime. Anywhere. You are everywhere and nowhere all at once. When the days are bright, I am blinded by your presence and even when the world is dark I still manage to find you. In laughter, I hear the echo of losing you. Your presence is overflowing in the tears that fall. Now that your body is gone, everything holds your being. I miss you in the cold depths of winter and I long for you in the thick summer breeze. You are my first rising thought in the morning and my last notion as I sink into the heaviness of the night. I thought we ran out of moments together, but every moment seems to belong to you. How can you be everywhere when you are nowhere to be seen? I used to worry about facing the world because I didn't know what would trigger my heartache. I used to be afraid of every feeling, every memory, every moment because I didn't know which ones held you. Now I know you are everywhere and I think that I know why. You're everywhere because you're somewhere inside of who I am. I am the bearer of your life and your memory. I am the keeper of your existence. Even though you're gone, I never really have to search for you. I never know where I'll find you but you are always there. I never know when I will miss you and it happens all the time"

- Rachel Whalen

I had lost count of how many times I had fallen back asleep since he had left for another day of work, the second time in the last few days. I’d be telling a lie if I said that I didn’t miss him, because like he’d confessed when he thought I was sleeping, I missed him all of the time too. The difference was that I felt it now when he was gone. I wasn’t sure why I’d bitten his head off that night about going back to work. I did but couldn’t think about it after the way he broke down in front of me and I just stood there. I didn’t do a thing. Instead, I shook my head and pushed him away. God, how could I do that to him? I thought he’d moved on . . . That’s how it went. I’d wake up to an empty, cold bed and the guilt would come in crashing waves. The hot tears would follow and eventually, I’d fall back into another fitful sleep. Nightmares were almost always guaranteed, but for the first time in our relationship, I comforted myself back to sleep. Somehow, they didn’t wake him like before, but last night when he woke with a gasp that melted into tears, I think I knew because he was busy with his own.

At first, I thought I’d been imagining it, or maybe that was just my coping mechanism by now. Denial and pretending. No, it really was and it went around like a circle. Denying the denial. But when the knocking on the door turned into the dinging of the doorbell, I knew that it was real. It didn’t stop after a few times, like the mailman would. No, this person was persistent, and I definitely was not. I couldn’t even find the strength to move to look at the alarm clock to see the time. By then, it had stopped. He’d only been gone an hour now and I missed him deeply, finding it hard to not pick up the phone to ask him to come home. I did but in my own way, and not one he’d understand, despite how he knew every page of my book.

I hope work is going well

Only a few minutes passed before a reply came in with a silent vibration.

thanks it is, just meetings again and an interview

Sounds boring. I know how you hate both. New hire?

possibly. i forgot to tell u gwen left. i hope ur getting some rest

No, you hadn’t but that’s ok. I think I only talked to her like 5 times. I’m trying.

ya she was good, just kept 2 herself. want me 2 pick up anything for lunch? anything soundin good? Starbucks? pizza? u can have whatever u want

You can pick

At that, I heard my phone lock before placing it face down onto the bedside table, not able to continue a conversation about food any longer. Another wave of irrational tears came at missing him and wanting normalcy back, but the fitful sleep didn’t follow. I wasn’t sure if I was regretful or not when I peeled back the covers, shocked by the sudden cold.

The chilling silence filling the house hit me in the face when I stepped out into the hallway. It had been choking at times, mostly at night when things were at their worst. During the day, like now, it was never this quiet. Something on the tv was always playing, and I soon found myself in front of it, watching the end of a Marvel movie Harry and I once watched.

Its sequel was nearing the halfway point by the time the doorbell rang again. It was on its fourth time now and the person still hadn’t stopped. The surprise on their face was just as strong as that of mine when I found myself at the door, in front of Harry’s grandmother.

“Hi, Becky,” she said softly, a warm cadence to her words like always. I may have been biased towards grandmas, but Harry’s checked all of the points and more. I couldn’t help the squeeze of my heart at the mere sight of her, a melancholy smile spreading on her lips.

“Claire. Um, hi. Harry isn’t here right now, he had to go into work this morning,” I rush, unsure of why I’m telling her this, except for I know why. I hadn’t spoken to another human being that wasn’t Harry or my doctor since . . since it had happened. Sure, texts to Skye, my dad, and Robbie. It was the only way to placate them from telling them I didn’t want to see them. Can I blame them, though?

“Oh, that’s okay. I was uh, hoping I could come in,” she suggests. I stand there, taken aback by her request. I had come to love this woman like she was my own grandmother, and yet here I am, not opening the door for her. “Maybe we could wait for him together with some brookies.”

Dropping my eyes, I watch as she lifts a saran wrapped plate of chocolatey looking cookies. I didn’t need to look any longer to know what they were. Her famous brownie cookies that Harry had compared any cookie or brownie of mine to over the years, and I eventually had found out why.

“You know I can’t turn those down,” I mumble, feeling the first hints of a smile. She grins for me instead, following me into the house that somehow feels even emptier when we step inside. Awkwardly, I closed the door behind her, pulling my hands back into the oversized King’s College crewneck of Harry’s I’d stolen long ago. “Can I . . Can I get you something to drink? Coffee? Water? Tea?” I stumble, watching as she takes a seat at the island, setting down one of those cloth bags beside her.

“Coffee would be fine, honey,” she says, and always with a smile. I welcome the distraction, feeling as if I’d forgotten how to talk to another person. No, I know that I have. I hadn’t even been able to carry on a conversation with Harry, nonetheless his grandmother.

At times, I still felt uncomfortable around his parents, especially his dad. If there was one of them that I felt the easiest around, it was Claire. I’m reminded of the bouquet of black eyed susans probably now wilting on the table when she notes the array of flowers taking up space over there. I nod at her words while closing the lid of the instant coffee machine, placing a tall mug underneath the spout. The compassionate words scribbled in her cursive with its accompanying card come back to me, and suddenly, the steaming coffee grows blurry before my eyes. Sometimes, I wondered if she had a feeling about things like me, because as the first tear fell, she speaks an apology.

“I’m sorry for coming unannounced. I had let Harry know I was in town and would stop by today, but he must have forgotten to mention it to you,” she begins in a low volume, a Harry-like molasses shining in her voice. I mumble an ‘it’s okay’ while watching the coffee continue to fill the mug. It’s almost done, but then what will I do to distract myself? “Harry had said your fridge was quite full, but I couldn’t help but make a few of your favorites to bring you both. Times like these, cooking feels like the last thing you want to do.”

“A lot of things do,” I find myself saying, surprising her I’m sure and especially myself. I hadn’t even been able to find it in myself to put that feeling into words and say them to Harry. It was a blessing and a curse how we could read each other so well, but I know I’d closed myself off from him a long time ago. On accident and then, on purpose.

Ripples form across the surface of the liquid as the last few drops plummet into the dark abyss. I wait, staring at the steam rising from the mug, unsure as to why. A silence had embedded itself into these walls so long ago I couldn’t remember, and it sat between us now too. I still didn’t know how to broach it, and there was no nudging the switch that would let me talk about her. I truly didn’t know how to, not even to her father. Sometimes, I wanted to forget her so I’d stop hurting, but that felt like an impossibility and then a crime. Gulping, I wipe at my cheeks and thread my fingers through the ceramic handle.

“Those are a beautiful assortment of flowers,” she comments again when I set the drink down in front of her. A forced ‘thank you’ leaves my lips when I turn around and walk towards the fridge. “You and Harry are so loved, and so was your baby.”

I’d opened this fridge how many times over the years, and now as the handle sits in my palm, I can’t find it in myself to do it. The forgotten coupons, lists, photographs, drawings from Harper and Ollie, and magnets grew hazy before my eyes. The hum of the coffee machine cooling down wasn’t enough to mask the whimper that escaped my lips, no matter how desperately I tried to shove it down. After breathing in and out a few times, it still didn’t help, but I was able to open the door and grab what I’d needed.

Keeping my head down, I set the coffee creamer in front of her, not spending a second more facing her with the damage on my cheeks. As the spoon clinks against the sides of her mug, I distract myself by finding room in the fridge for the filled tupperware containers she’d taken from the bag. Scribbled labels adorn the top of each one, but I look past them as I stack them on a shelf. From the corner of my eye, I saw her stand from her seat to look at the flowers, thumbing at the typed messages. It’s not until the last one is snug against a container of yogurt and strawberries that somebody says something.

“They always say the same things, don’t they?” she murmurs with an out of place scoff, sounding like a hum from her lips. The tears had dried up as I thought about how to fit a container of beef stroganoff amongst tater tot casserole, but when I turned around, her face still falls. “It was the same with Steven too. They all say that they understand, but there’s no way that they can. They hadn’t lost their spouse, or . . their baby.” This roots me to the spot and we spend the next few moments looking at each other as her Soft Rose lipsticked lips fall.

“I didn’t want to come, Becky, because I know that when I lost my loves, I wanted to be alone. But that was where my demons lied in wait, and I don’t want you to go through the same thing I did when I lost my baby,” she continues. I couldn’t tell if it was the light or the way my eyes deceive me with a returning wetness, but a similar glint appears in hers. It holds my attention for a mere moment until my heart starts to pound against my ribs. “Steven and I were a little younger than you and Harry when we lost our baby at four months.”

There could be no saving my throat nor my eyes as I gulp against the dryness, feeling all of the wetness detour down my face. Her words ricochet inside of me, bouncing off walls. For the first time in too long, they sink in and make me feel something. I resist at first, not wanting to let my chest shake or my heart race, but there’s no stopping it. Staring back at her, she quietly sits back down and takes a sip from her coffee. Looking back to me, a corner of her mouth twitches as a gleaming droplet beads at her chin.

“What has it been now? Fifty five years and I still miss them . . my little baby,” the blood pounds in my ears as I stare at her in what, amazement? Horror? Complete and utter surprise? Probably, all of them.

“Gran, I-I never knew,” a voice says from behind me. Turning, another wave of shock courses through me at the sight of Harry with his hand on the door to the garage.

“I never told anybody, except for my immediate family when it had happened . . The thing was, the taboo around miscarriages and infertility hasn’t changed a whole lot since then. It disappoints me really . . Back then, you didn’t talk about it. Now, sometimes you talk about it, but it’s just the same. It’s near to impossible to speak about. Friends and family want to say something, but they don’t know how to without hurting you. So, instead of mentioning the loved one you lost, people don’t when they think of them, and they’re forgotten. That’s always been my worst fear, and I don’t want either of you to go through that- I cried when your mother told me what had happened, Harry. My heart breaks for the both of you, knowing that you’re going through the same nightmare that my Steven and I did.”

A puff leaves his lips and I can almost hear him gulp as sound evades us. Words haven’t been a friend to my lips in what feels like months, and right now isn’t an exception.

“I’m so sorry, Gran.”

“You have nothing to apologize for, Harry. I’m so sorry that you lost your baby . . I heard it was a girl, your daughter,” her words are ginger and slow. Somehow, another piece joins the puzzle, but it still leaves me staring at the floor as tidal waves crash inside of me. “It was a long time ago, but I still miss them and wonder who they’d be. I’m sorry to say that never goes away, and that the whole b-s of ‘time heals all wounds’ isn’t entirely true. You just build up scar tissue to it, but some days are worse than others. I miss Steven terribly some days, like the day you announced your engagement, and your pregnancy. When your mother told me over the phone three weeks ago, I wished he could’ve been there too, for you to talk to about fathers losing a child. Men are still pressured to not show emotions but it was just as hard on him to lose our baby, and sometimes fathers are forgotten.”

A mess of emotions roils inside of me, flipping my stomach upside down. My heart too, arguably. The last sound that I make out is a sniffle of his before I’m bringing my hands to my eyes, and sobbing against them. It felt like I stood there for minutes before escaping down the hall, when it was only a few seconds in reality.

I wasn’t certain if they knew what I did. That I could hear them from the bedroom down the hall, the place I’d come to retreat to instead of Harry’s arms. I felt him coming towards me just moments ago, but I couldn’t do it. I think I’d almost forgotten what his touch felt like. If they thought I could hear them, they probably had mistaken me for being asleep or for not listening. I think they tried to keep their voices down, but despite Harry being a closet musician, there wasn’t much for treatment to these walls. He’d joked before about having sex one night his mom stayed here but I pushed him away, chalking it up to thin walls.

Now, the memory wasn’t that funny to me as I heard their conversation. I almost felt guilty, as if I was cheating by hearing them, but this was the only way I could take part in a conversation I know I should be part of. I didn’t think that I could even speak if I had wanted to, because of the hiccuped sobs that filled my chest, making it hard to speak. I know that I made the right decision when my head rests against the door upon hearing about what they say next, about me.

“I can hardly get her to have a conversation with me, Gran. Let alone about . . about the baby.”

“Oh, Harry. You just have to give her time.”

“I know and I have, but it’s becoming all the harder to feel as time passes. She’s getting worse and I’m barely staying put together. It scares me so much, because I don’t want to lose her too. If I did, I’d lose everything I have to live for.”

At last, the sound of my choked sobs drowned out that of their voices. By the time my lungs calmed down and my heart hardened once more, it was quiet. I missed his voice despite how it had almost betrayed me to another, and made me hurt. My rumbling stomach ultimately won the race and it was what led me down the hall, and without knowing, back to her. I blamed it on the appetizing smell wafting from the kitchen.

I’d already seen her and had decided to keep going, but upon passing the island where she sat again, I heard her intake of breath. Harry wasn’t anywhere to be seen, despite the wiped clean plate in the sink with the large fork and an empty can. He was the only one who used them and who drank the sparkling waters that I thought tasted like bug spray.

“I’m so sorry, Becky. The last thing I wanted was to upset you, honey.”

“You don’t have to apologize. Frankly, I’m rather tired of people saying those two words, but thank you,” I return, a steadiness arriving in my voice that I didn’t know I’d missed. “Can I-?”

“Of course, it’s all yours,” she insists with a smile. Nodding, I pick up the serving spoon and a plate, feeling my stomach grow happy at the sight and smell of her famous homemade lasagna. “There’s garlic bread in the oven and salad in the fridge. I’m just going to use the little girl’s room.”

I almost smile, realizing that I’ve missed her and just maybe, I feel okay enough to talk about it. I’d found a seat at the island beside her empty cup of coffee, already digging into the lasagna. An almost embarrassing moan left my lips at the taste of the layers of cheese, pasta, and bolognese sauce.

“Leave it to Claire to find the way to your heart,” somebody comments. Turning, I find Harry walking towards me with a tilt to his lips. He unrolls the hem of a Queen Bohemian Rhapsody shirt, looking more like himself now that he’s out of a suit. Sometimes, I still catch myself thinking that it was always the opposite, seeing how I’d know him to always be in suits for so long.

To my surprise, I don’t flinch or pull back when his hand arrives on my shoulder as I wipe my mouth with a napkin.

“You don’t know how happy it makes me to see you eating, and enjoying it . . I’m surprised you haven’t broken into that plate of brookies yet,” he comments. Something happy buds on my lips when his lips sponge a kiss to my temple.

“So am I,” I reply, cutting myself another bite of the food. To my happiness, his arm comes around my shoulder and stays there. I welcome it and feel a warmth grow in my gut upon finding the courage to meet his eyes. They hold something that I learn to be mischief when he plucks one of the cookies off the plate. “Hey, save some for me.”

“Don’t worry, they’re all yours. Well, except a few for me. Maybe we could split them down the middle. Half for me and half for you,” he suggests with a cocky shrug to his broad shoulders. It surprises us both when my lips spill a few second giggle. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed that sound.”

“I’ve missed you,” it’s but a squeak and still, I know he hears it by the sad curl of his lips. “I’m going to try.”

“Thank you, my lovebug. That’s all I can ask for,” he smiles, stealing a quick peck from my lips. It catches me off guard and I find myself staring at him while he manages to take a bite that’s half of the cookie. He winks at me and I turn away, shoveling a large bite of cheesy pasta past my lips.

Another bite had donned my fork by the time Claire found her seat beside us. I’d made a dent in my garlic bread by now as Harry worked on his second cookie.

Swallowing, I loaded my fork with a scrap of melted cheese and bolognese sauce. “Claire. How . . How did you do it? Be okay again after losing your baby? It . . It feels impossible,” the words seem to come from nowhere at first.

After a few moments, I know where they stem from, and just how much importance they hold. It looks back at me in Harry’s eyes when I peer up at him, smiling back when he thumbs away a tear below my eye. As her response hits our ears, I reach my arm out and across his back, holding tightly onto his side. I didn’t let go once as we cried together with his grandma about our lost babies, and neither did he.

I went to bed with a hope in my heart, thinking that tomorrow would be different. Alas, I woke up to an empty bed and it wasn’t. I wasn’t surprised but sure, I was let down. I knew that somebody else would be much more disappointed than I was, if that were possible.

It wasn’t long after my waking realization that there was a knock on the door anda creak, “Hey, buggie. I’m making french toast. How many pieces do you want?” The rest of the night had been uneventful, for once. His grandma stayed for another hour or two as we ate cookies and I finally talked about it. Her. Now, lying with my back to Harry, I didn’t know how to do that again. To talk. “Wakey wakey, it’s nearly noon.”

His voice was closer now as his hands settled on my shoulders from behind. The feeling of his thumbs kneading the tissue made me want to let him drive away the intrusive thoughts. To let him win, but I didn’t know how. Yesterday had seemed like a fluke, as I looked back on it. Even if he was her father, how could I explain to him the hollowness that had filled me when I remembered that my child had died inside of me? No, that wasn’t something he could understand, nor could he hear how much I wished he had been there that morning. That the fact he wasn’t there had changed everything. I couldn’t tell him that and I never wanted to, but I’d gotten close. At the times his nagging and hovering drove me up the wall, my tongue itched to deal the worst blows just to get him off my back. I knew it was wrong, so much of it was but I didn’t know how to stop. All I knew how to do was to drown myself in my regret afterwards. Sometimes, I was mad that we couldn’t keep alcohol around, but at others, I was glad for it.

His molasses voice murmurs my name once more, another time that I ignore, until I can’t. “No thanks.”

“I can bring it in here for you. There’s bacon and strawberries too. Orange juice, as well.”

Shaking my head, I bury my face deeper into the pillow, finding that it has his smell. At one time, he had been my safety blanket, but now it was his smell that could calm me down. I wanted to feel guilty about it but I didn’t have the energy to feel guilt because of anything else as it was all focused on one thing.

“I’ll have a little bit,” I surrender, listening to his hopeful response before leaving. For once, he let me eat alone in the bedroom. But he still inspected my plate, and I could tell that he was biting back a remark as he read the paper at the island.

“Can we talk?”

“What about?” I replied, bending over to place my dishes in the dishwasher. Standing back up, I fail at readying myself for his next onslaught of questions. The ones that I can’t answer.

“You know . . About Phoebe,” he answers. I hear it, the way he has to shove the words past his lips in order to get them out. I only know because I’ve done it a thousand times, and often with him. You do it when it’s too hard to say, but you know that it has to be done regardless.

“What’s there to talk about?”

“Becks,” he sighs, annoyance clear in his voice. “I thought you said that you were going to try. Last night went so well and you did great, I-.”

“I just can’t do it today. Okay, Harry?” I retort tearfully, catching the sagging of his features when I lock eyes with him. Sighing, I forget the cookie I’d picked up, placing the saran wrap back over it.

“So what, we need to schedule a fricken time to talk about it?”

I’d begun my retreat, but I wasn’t far enough yet. No, if I was in earshot of Harry, it wasn’t over yet. It had always been that way, ever since the beginning.

“Harry, please,” my words start, decorated with tears that drag my words underwater.

“We got pregnant and we . . we had a miscarriage, Becks. It’s nearly been a month now, but what comes next? When do we get back to normal?”

I hadn’t even been facing him and the words felt like a slap in the face. The look on mine must have felt similar to him, because when I turn around to look at him through blurry eyes, he melts into a puddle of regret.

“I didn’t mean it that way, Becks. Not-.”

“Not what way, Harry? That we should just forget about it and move on with our lives? God, you’re sounding like the doctor the other day who said that we can start trying again whenever we want. But I don’t want to try again yet, Harry, because I’m too scared that we’d lose another one- I mean, what if I can’t have kids? And- I don’t want to forget her or replace her,” but he didn’t hear the last part and I hadn’t decided if I’d wanted him to.

“You don’t know that, Becks, and that’s not what I meant at all. I promise,” he interrupts. The legs of his oversized sweatpants sag down to his ankles when he stands. “I didn’t say we had to get pregnant again right away. I’m fucking scared too. I just mean that I want us to get better. Collectively and on our own. I hate seeing you so upset all of the time, and just want you to be happy. We’re supposed to get married sometime this year and I still don’t know when that’s going to happen. The house is going to be ready in a few months, and I wanted to bring you there one day to look at the progress.”

I had begun to shake my head long before he’d stopped talking. It brought an edge to his words and an annoyance that I didn’t like, despite inciting it. A loud puff passes his lips and he returns to the chair, raking a hand through his hair. That either meant annoyance or boredom, or both. Like I tend to do, I take it personally and figure he’s both annoyed and bored of me, not that it was anything new lately.

“I can’t do that, Harry. I-I can’t,” fumbling with my words, my hand gets caught in my hair as I avoid his eyes. It doesn’t stop him from retorting an inquisitive ‘why not?’ “How am I supposed to go and see the house we’re building that has five extra bedrooms, Harry? How do you expect me to look at the rooms we planned out for o-our kids, and one for . . for Phoebe’s nursery when she’s not coming anymore?”

“Becks,” the nickname leaves his lips like that one breath that’s knocked out of you when you fall. The wrinkles that are rarely there above his eyes return as his eyebrows fall deeply. “I didn’t . . I wasn’t thinking. I’m so sorry.”

“And so am I, but . . I just can’t do that right now, o-or talk about her. I’m sorry,” I say with haste to my words and in my actions. The sad sound from his lips follows me to the couch where I perch, pretending to watch the tv. He doesn’t join me and after a while of pretending, my eyes start to droop.

The image of Shrek and Fiona making animal balloons falls away until a sound wakes me. Time had passed because now Fiona stands in front of Lord Farquad and Shrek is nowhere to be seen.

“I’m going to run an errand. Is there um, anything you need, bug?” he murmurs, the jangling of keys adorning his words.

“No thanks.”

“Okay, I won’t be long- Becks?” he speaks up, clearing his throat at last. I call back a question and wait as he idles. “I really am sorry about earlier, I didn’t mean anything insensitively or to upset you. I’d never want to do that.”

“I know, Harry. It’s okay,” are the last words that pass between us before he bids me a goodbye. I welcome the lack of silence but curl into the couch more, pulling the blanket around me as the movie continues.

My head throbbed when I stood up, but it had been happening a lot lately. I knew it was because I hadn’t been eating much, and as I think about that, my feet lead me to the fridge.

I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt full after eating, and still wanting a cookie afterwards. Like I do now. Licking the crumbs from my fingers after the last bite, the wooden floor is cold against my bare feet. For a reason I don’t know, I soon am staring up the staircase, and in that direction. It pulls at me to climb the stairs, but something deep down throbs in denial.

Instead, my attention is stolen when my ringtone blares from the couch. I lose my phone half of the time these days and so calls went unanswered. Assuming it was Harry with a grocery question, I picked it up without looking at who it was.

“Hi, Boops.”

“Dad,” I almost sigh, but I was unsure as to why. Was it the bombardment of talking to my dad on the phone for the first time in almost a month? Most likely. Or was it the homesickness that grew in my gut at the sound of his voice. “Daddy.”

“Hi, honey. I was hoping you’d answer. I’ve missed your voice.”

Sinking onto the couch, my bottom lip quivers as I try to breathe in slowly, but my heart won’t listen. It hasn’t for a while now.

“I’ve missed yours, Daddy.”

“Oh, baby girl,” he says in an exhale. Already, I know that he hears what my voice is dipped in, but I don’t hide it. It was too late for that. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am.”

“I’m getting really sick of that word, but thanks, Dad.”

His classical chuckle begins its opening but it falters there, and so did any chance at mine. Silence had rarely been uncomfortable with my Dad. That was only when I’d gotten into trouble or when I was trying to tell him about something that had happened with my Mom, which usually went hand in hand. Over the years, I could hardly count the times silence had grown awkward between us, until it did now.

“What are you doing?” he decides to say, lifting my eyes to the tv screen where it appears Fiona and Farquaad will get their Happily Ever After. I knew without needing to think what would happen next. They wouldn’t, because it never really happens that way. No, it’s not that easy or immediate.

“Watching Shrek on the couch.”

“Is Harry there?” he murmurs a question.

“No, he went to do something not long ago. I don’t know what,” I answer, wrapping the tassels of the blanket around my finger until it hurts. “I think he’s mad at me. I can’t tell anymore, it seems like he always is.”

“I’m sure that’s not true, honey.”

Shaking my head for nobody to see, I taste blood when pressing my lips together to hold back the whimpering. Sniffling, I breathe in raggedly before speaking, “I think it is . . I can’t blame him, because I’ve been so horrible to him, Dad. H-He was supposed to be a Daddy and I’ve forgotten that he’s g-going through all of this too. I’ve been in my own little world being sad a-about the baby, and I forgot about him, Dad. I’m supposed to marry him soon, and I don’t even wear my ring anymore, and I can’t go upstairs, and-,” he doesn’t cut me off. I leave that honor for myself as I watch the color drain from my finger when I unwrap the tassel. I’d slowly come to hate the color red, even refusing to eat strawberries at first. It’d become the color I’d hated most after . . after that morning.

“I’m sure that he understands, Ree, or he’s at least trying to. I’ve spoken to him a few times now, and he’s not mad at you. He’s just frustrated and overwhelmed. Harry hates to see you unhappy, it’s always been that way with you too, and vice versa. He wants to fix everything, but I told him that’s not always possible. You can’t fix another person . . . and neither can you, Boops. You’re doing your best and so is he, and after a while-.”

“But I’m not, Dad. I’m hardly trying, only when I feel like it. I . . I don’t know how to do any of this and I don’t want to. I don’t want her to be gone. I was supposed to be a Mom. Her Mom,” I weep, pressing the handful of blanket against my eyes, catching my tears.

“I wish I could make it all better for you too, honey. Ever since you were little, I wanted to kiss the owies better and tell off the kids who were mean to you, but . . . you have to do it yourself and when you can, Becky. You can’t rush this. Grief, it doesn’t have a timetable or a road map- and, honey, you are a Mom. You’re Phoebe’s Mom. Nothing will ever change that,” somehow, I cry harder at his last words, melting into the couch.

“Thank you, Daddy,” I cry into the phone, wishing it was his shoulder, instead. It’s a few moments filled with the sound of my tears and his own sniffles, before I speak again. “But how do I . . how do I let Harry back in? I pushed him away without meaning to and now we’re so far apart, Dad.”

“I think that you need to remember that he’s grieving the loss of a child too. Your child together, Ree, and that he’s feeling the exact same feelings that you are. He’s devastated at not getting to be a father to Phoebe, to meet her, watch her grow up into a person, and do all of the things that you’re grieving the loss of too. You’re a team, honey, and you need to give each other some grace too. There aren’t any rules to this and maybe I shouldn’t talk because I’m divorced, but the first reason you’re there with each other is because you love each other. You have to remember that too, honey. Hey, I’m sorry, I think I’m burning my dinner in the oven. Can I call you back later, sweetie?”

“Yeah, Dad. Of course. Um, thank you. That really helped me,” I reply, swiping at my tears with the dry side of the blanket.

“I’m glad to hear it. I love you, Boops.”

“I love you too, Daddy,” and he’s gone. All I hear is the silence of the dead call and Shrek’s voice on the tv as he yells at Lord Farquaad. It’s what fills my ears and distracts my mind when I lay my head on the pillow, resting my hand on my belly without thinking. But unlike every other time I’d found myself doing it since . . since I was actually holding my baby, I let it stay there, wildly wishing she could be here watching Shrek with me.

I heard him come in when the credits of the movie are switching to the opening of its sequel. It was arguably the best, in my opinion, but it was something Harry and I had always disagreed upon. The memory sparks an invitation for him on my tongue, but upon raising my head, I watch him disappear down the hallway.

My ears aren’t sure what to focus on, the sound of his parting footsteps, the racing of my heart, or guitar strings soon being plucked from down the hall. It wasn’t much of a choice, because my feet were already leading me towards his study. A place where he had been spending a lot of time recently. I find myself gravitating towards the sound and wanting to hear more, but I stop outside the door nervously. My heart pulls me forward, despite the way it gallops, making me feel sick to my stomach. Standing there, I wonder why this is something I’m nervous about, but nothing is the same anymore. I hadn’t felt this way for what had it been now, years? There hadn’t been a time since the beginning that I was nervous to talk to Harry, and yet, here I stood doing just that.

His playing stopped and I perked up, making out the scribbling of pen on paper. Was he writing a song, I wondered quietly and wished I could ask. I didn’t know how to, and that was something I’d thought too many times lately. How to get out of bed. To eat a whole plate of food. Talk to my family and friends. I hardly even knew how to talk to Harry anymore. That’s what was holding me back, wasn’t it? Sure, if you wanted to sum it up.

“I know you’re standing outside the door . . Did you need something?” Harry murmurs, an edge to his voice. It was one that had appeared out of the blue and refused to leave. I only knew because I’d felt my voice change like that too.

There’s the creaking of the floor before I press the ajar door open enough for me to fit through. I find him sitting back down on his office chair, but he faces away from me, a guitar propped on his lap.

“How’d you know?” I ask softly, still awkwardly standing in the doorway. His eyes flit to mine and I’m unsure of why I look away, except that I can’t face him. No, not when mine are still wet and I’m sure they aren't going to dry up anytime soon. Not after what I’m about to say.

“You forget how long I’ve known you,” he mumbles, peering down at the moleskin journal he scribbles in. “Four years, give or take. You learn their cues and the sounds they make when you come to know somebody for that long. That’s how I heard you at the door, it was your footsteps.”

“Oh,” I respond flatly, feeling dumb. His tone doesn’t imply it and nor do his words, but the embarrassment has run rampant already.

Watching him write and escape to his own little world had always been one of my favorite things to observe. Even his handwriting was something that brought me . . comfort. I blamed it on the familiarity, but as it pours from his pen, it makes my heart slow down a few ticks.

“My Dad called and we talked for a little bit.”

Harry hums a reply, crossing something out on the piece of paper. Scratching his head, he sighs whilst staring at the writing. I can’t make it out from here, but once again, the silence finds its old spot. Remembering his initial question when he heard me at the door, I worry that I’m bothering him. Gulping past the nervousness and doubt, I pedal forward.

“Was that yours?” I ask warily, noting his head rising so he can meet my eyes for a split second. They hold a question in them, perhaps dozens. “The song. It . . It was really pretty.”

“Yeah . . It’s just something I’ve been playing around with,” his answer comes out in a pillowy tone. It has changed ever since . . since I’d run away from him, and I hear it now as he speaks his reply.

“I really . . really like it,” I comment, looking towards the ceiling when his grandfather’s Gibson acoustic grows hazy in my eyes.

“Thank . . you. Hey, what is it? Did your dad say something that upset you?” it had been so long since I’d heard that steely edge absent from his voice. I don’t know why I mourned it, because it was my fault it had ever arrived in the first place. Wasn’t it? “Becks.”

“Yeah, he said a lot of things th-that made sense, actually,” I confess, dropping my head to stare at my fingers that I wring. I’m unable to ignore the feeling of my lips trembling against each other, despite busying myself with adjusting my rings. They stop when I arrive at the one that speaks volumes, and how deeply I’d ignored it.

Braving the storm, I finally look at him. His greens are patient and soft, something neither of our eyes have been for the other for awhile now. Without breaking eye contact, he settles his guitar onto its stand and discards the pad of paper.

“Harry, c-can I have a hug?” slowly, the overdue question comes.

“Of course,” he responds, a corner of his mouth quirking up. Already, he’s holding his arms out towards me. “You’ve never needed to ask, buggie.”

“Thank you,” I murmur, feeling the air whoosh out of me when my body touches his. Somehow, my chest shakes harder with a new sob. It only worsens when his hands come under my thighs, lifting me up to sit on his lap.

“It’s been so long since we’ve hugged,” I know he doesn’t mean to, but it feels like a chasm through my chest when he says that. The guilt that had arrived at my dad’s words increases by tenfold.

“I’m sorry,” it’s but a whisper against his neck, my favorite place for hide and seek. But it was always him seeking me, it had been for months now, and I hadn’t let him win. Not once.

“What?”

“I’m so sorry for everything, Harry,” I repeat, pulling back to find his greens swarmed by tears. Swiping my thumb under them, I catch the way that they leak with sadness. “For how horribly I’ve treated you this last month, and how . . how I forgot that you- you lost our baby too.”

“Oh, honey. You don’t have to-,” he begins, adamant in his apology. One that I won’t accept.

“No, but I do have to apologize,” I sob, surprised at the way I’m shocked by the rough feeling of his cheeks. It had been so long since I’d touched him like this, despite watching him grow his beard out. “My dad, he . . he put it into perspective for me. I can’t believe I didn’t see it before, I hate myself for that, for-.”

“Hey, don’t hate yourself for anything. This last month has been a Hell we never thought we’d have to endure. Something we shouldn’t have to deal with, and one that isn’t our fault,” he insists, thumbing at the place where a dimple would usually fall in my left cheek. I’d forgotten it was there, just like I’d done the same to him.

“But all you’ve been doing is trying to take care of me, and I made that so hard for you,” comes my cry against his palm, feeling the way he holds me together from breaking for the thousandth time. No, that would imply I’d have been put back together, but that wasn’t something I’d done. “You tried to make me eat and I fought you on it until you stopped talking about it. I argued with you and ignored you when you were just trying to keep the world going, but you never stopped, even though I did. You didn’t stop living and loving me when I stopped.”

“Becks, it’s okay,” he repeats, the words sliding into my ears as my hand wanders to his neck. A hoodie with cartoons from our childhoods dons his upper half, tattoos peeking out from the color. I found the charm of his necklace instantaneously, something I could do in the dark.

“But it’s not, Harry. It’s not okay how I treated you. I forgot you and that you’ve been mourning the loss of your child too. Our b-baby,” I whimper, sniffling when I inhale uneasily. My fingers shake before me until he takes hold of my hand, surrounding it with his own before pressing it to his lips. “I’m so sorry.”

“I forgive you, Becks. I always will,” Harry says, tucking his chin over my head when I melt against him. “I meant it that first night after we came home and you disappeared on me . . We lost our baby, our child, and I can’t . . I can’t lose you too, Rebecca. I have, time and time again, and I can’t do it again. I’ve hardly stayed pieced together lately being so far away from each other like we have . . God, the only thing that kept me going was just thinking, ‘one more day’ for so many days.”

Hiccuping, my hands brace themselves against his taut back, feeling his own drift along my spine. Shaking my head against the crook of his neck, I struggle to breathe, let alone speak, “I’m so sorry, Harry. I can’t believe how awful I was to you. We’re supposed to get married soon, and I can’t even live up to that in sickness and health part of the vows.”

He continued to murmur assurances that everything was okay, and for the first time in a long while, I found myself believing him. Crying against his neck, I heard his own shed tears onto mine as my hands rubbed circles into his shoulders.

“I’m sorry I got mad at you that day for going to work, even though you asked me and I said it was okay . . And-.”

“Shhh, it’s okay. You don’t have to do that, Becks,” he assures me, pressing a kiss to my head. Again, I believe him, and it feels easier to breathe. Just in the slightest.

“I was such a bitch to you.”

Something sparks inside of my chest at the sound I hear next, one that had been lost along the way. His laugh. His song.

“I’ve been known to be quite the dick on one or two occasions, as well,” I savor the glint that appears in his eyes upon pulling away. It had been one of the first times I was able to lift my head since before all of this had happened, because it had been better just to hide. No, not now.

The quirk to his lips is a full on tilt now, and through them, I’m reminded of what drew me to this man in the first place. It was those eyes and that smile that made me melt upon impact. Well, then there’s the sunshine they share, and how I taste it when his lips meet mine for really the first time in what, a month. Emotion pulls at me from somewhere underneath at the thought, but he makes me forget rather quickly. He’s always been good at that.

His peppermint chapstick sticks to my lips after he’s pulled away several seconds later, trying to catch his breath. The cobwebs have been dusted away in more ways than one, and it feels weird at first, wrong almost, but I laugh. It catches him by surprise too and his eyes focus on me, and only grow brighter.

“I’ve missed kissing you, and laughing with you,” Harry grins, pressing one more to my lips before brushing his nose against mine.

“So have I. I’m s-.”

“I swear, if you say that word one more time,” he tuts, shaking his head with his bottom lip caught between his teeth.

“What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. I’ll have to figure out something,” he says, sighing for the dramatic effect. I giggle along with him a moment later, remembering the flecks of gold hidden in his eyes. I remember a lot, too much almost, and the gold is gone as my eyes flood once more. “I know it’s hard, Becks. Something has never been this difficult for me . . for you either. But we have to talk, and I’ve been aching for ages now to talk to you . . I don’t want to ignore it, because they shouldn’t be forgotten. Our daughter. We need to talk about them, about her,” I’m nodding before he can finish, feeling his warm lips against my forehead as I focus on my breaths. “In and out, bug. In and out. We can do this. We’ll start slow.”

I haven’t stopped nodding, but once my lungs start to work again, I pull away and find his eyes once more. It comes to me and I can’t hold it back in anymore, knowing I need to say it first. To tell him.

“Okay, let’s talk about o-our daughter,” I begin, cringing at the sound of my voice breaking already. He nods, cupping my face in his palm, the sweetest of looks on his face.

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles alternate universe #one direction fanfiction #one direction #fanfic #wattpad #harry styles wattpad #writing #vanchlo writes #heck yes #becky x harry #tempestad #elmundodebecks

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flowerslightning · 4 years ago

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The OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) in FF7

This thing actually caught my eyes while reading a few theory about FF7R and the word OCD appear in their certain analysis, in IG, youtube comments and some posts in tumblr too. Dunno why but they always relate Biggs with OCD. I looked back to the scenes where Biggs appear and... Okay, i understand why they thinj Biggs has OCD or perfectionist

A lot of people, including the psych students themselves easily confused with OCD and perfectionist (I got confused by it quite often too). Now, is Biggs OCD or is he just a perfectionist? Let's take a deeper look at it

Biggs is not a famous character. So fans dont really care about him, but I do

Disclaimer : i'm not a psychologist. Im an intern and still studying. Psychiatric is not my major field but i got assigned there as an intern for quite a time and we got exposed a lot about psychology too. We didnt learn them professionally like the real psyche students, we learned (and still under training) through real life experience + a little bit from the books.

So there might be wrong interpretation here and there. Pls correct me if I'm misleading u. And pardon my english. Pls dont use any of these terms to diagnose urself. Remember, I'm a student, not a professional.

I kins of blame the social media for portraying OCD in such a nasty way, when someone with OCD is actually suffering inside.

OCD is not just about 'clean clean, must clean this place till squeaky clean' and OCD is not about being perfectionist. OCD and perfectionist are two different thing.

Perfectionist is more to a demand demeanour, eg "I want the cake to be like this. I want it to be pink. No, not that pink, it must be neon pink with slight purple. Do it again. No, i dont want that pink. Do it again. Ahhh yess, nice pink." Someone with perfectionist, after they got their result, they will immediately bcome calm and satisfied. Perfectionist is obviously different from OCPD (Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder). OCPD falls under Personality Disorder and it is different from OCD. Im not going to talk about that

Credit goes to crazyheadcomics.

Look at how OCD got spoken from the media perspective. It is very much resemble to Biggs, dont u think? In reality, someone with OCD always feel stress about everything around them, and they will find it hard to complete their task.

OCD has two components - Obsessive and Compulsive

| 1. Obsessive. It is a repeating thoughts about something and often occur until it makes someone feel stress about it. Eg, u think that ur hand will get bacteria infection if u touch a chair, door, fridge or when holding someone's hand. This thought always appear in ur mind everytime u touch the door, chair, fridge or somebody's hand, but when u touch ur shoes, u never think about the bacteria (in certain cases, some patients become scare of everything they touch)

| 2. Compulsive. It is a repeating of the same actions to fulfill the 'obsession' in order to reduce the stress acted upon them. Usually the 'action' has a specific ways in which the patient believe he has to do it like this or that way or else he will fail. Eg, after touching the chair, he will immediately wash his hand 10x from left to right. He believes the hand washing wont be effective if he starts from right to left

Another sign of OCD is when someone re-checking the door lock few times. Its normal for us to re-check once/twice the door lock for confirmation, but for people with OCD, they will re-check the door lock for about 6-10 times and still not feel satisfied and later they stress out. And also the OCD people, they tend to get annoyed when something is not in particular order and they will immediately fix it eventhough they know they're wrong.

I met a funny woman at the hosp arranging our students' books according to its thickness, when I asked her why did she arranged our books like that,

She replied : "Doctor said I have CDO"

Me : "Sorry, CDO? Never heard of it"

She : "It is actually OCD but I feel so stress hearing that term so I put it in alphabetical order. CDO, much better"

We both had a good laugh. Her case was not serious though, but she was feeling miserable with her thoughts and decided to meet a psychiatrist. I would say she was still in early stage for someone with OCD, but may lead to severe if left untreated

It is really hard to satisfy and convince someone with OCD and they always feel stress about something they shouldnt care too much about. U can say OCD is a fastidious type, and they're actually more than that

If we want to relate this condition with Bigg's case., urmm. The only time where I can spot him being different than the other characters is when he's busy sweeping his front house and when he pat Cloud's head during the Sector 7 plate fall.

The cleaning stuff isnt exactly weird thing for a human to do. But it is something odd, I mean, he just finished his mission with Jessie and survived a jump from the plate, and yet he still have the energy to sweep dry leaves, AT NIGHT! He can wait till tomorrow though and should get himself a proper rest.

Wedge says Biggs has a habit of overthinking stuff

And there we see Biggs sweeping the dry leaves. It might be because he is trying to distract himself from doing his bad habit - overthinking. But urm , i think there'll be higher chance for someone to overthink when doing house chore like Biggs is doing. This is where lots of people say Biggs cleaning the house at night is bcause he has OCD or he's a perfectionist.

But I dont think thats the case. For real, he is completely normal. No sign of him acting weird in that scene. If he really does have OCD or he's a perfectionist, we'll see more of him arguing with Barret about unnecessary stuff. He cant become one of Avalanche's strongest member (not exactly strong, but hey, he's trustworthy). Also, if u notice, Biggs have one earring on his right ear. Someone with OCD will feel irritated by it bcause his ear doesnt look 'balance'. OCD people, even in mild case, they want everything about them to be balance and in good order.

After trying to understand Biggs way of thinking and style through his short screentime, I strongly believe this guy has no such thing as OCD or being a perfectionist. Biggs just cares tooooo much about his friends, he thinks 10 times ahead from the bigger picture in which it frightens him about the bad consequences that will occur to people he cherish.

He is the type that always have a back up plan in his mind. He thinks of 5 possible bad things and comes out with 10 solutions. That's the power of an overthinker like Biggs I'll tell ya

Biggs probably cleaning his front house area at night bcause the next early morning, he will need to leave his house for the bombing mission. Better take care of things the night before the big day. He can ditch the cleaning work but he wont do it, not bcause he's a perfectionist/OCD, but try to imagine this, if ur front house is full with dry leaves and rubbish, it will be unpleasant for the neighbours next to ur house to see. Living in the slum means higher chance for u to get sick if u dont take care of ur surrounding hygiene. Biggs is a kind man, and I believe he doesnt want to upset his neighbours

He probably has overthink this matter like "If i dont do this now, I probably dont have time for doing it tomorrow. Maybe I'll broke my leg from the mission and this trash will be left untouched, then there'll be high chance for the children around here to get sick. What if they get infectious disease bcause of this dry leaves? And then the parents will be worried and the Sector 7 Slum will be in chaos etc etc. Time for plan A. Let's clean this place"

Besides, remember the post where I mentioned about Mental Health First Aid? Biggs, as the side character gives the best MFA to Cloud even without knowing what Cloud had gone through. Biggs is just toooo kind with his friends, he cares too much causing him to overthinks about his friends conditions. He can notice even the slightest change in his friend's behaviour and with his own instinct, he cheers for them

Aww man, how can u not love his personality? He's the sweetest side character ever (and kinda hot too).

Soo as the conclusion for my post here, Biggs does not have OCD. He's a side character with a big heart who cares tooooooo deeply about his friends that leads him to overthink too much.

However, if the devs say Biggs really has OCD then my statement about him will be invalid. I'm sure they have put everything in a very close detail look.

Btw, I personally think Biggs kind of portrays the other small side of Cloud, the overthinking part for their romantic partner. But Biggs express his worry through words while Cloud express it through his actions, eg - like how he always keep an eye on Tifa. He never speak it directly like "I'm worry about Tifa, I must help her", he just simply be with her either she needs a help or not. While Biggs clearly says "Jessie been acting weird, I should go if she needs any - help -"

Action speaks louder than words but sometimes our eyes failed to listen.

Alright, that's it. Thanks for being with me till the end.

#final fantasy 7 #final fantasy 7 remake #cloud strife #final fantasy vii #biggs #biggs final fantasy #ffvii biggs #mygif #character analysis

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istheresomebodywhocanimagine · 5 years ago

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Morning Skinny

anonymous said: Hi💖 can you write about Joe and You buying clothes for yourself with some flirting and innuendo.

(a/n: here’s a tiny lil piece of flirty joe/boyf!joe!!! it’s not much, but there’s some dorky little one liners in it if ur into that type of stuff. we love little shit joe)

“Well, there’s never a better time to go clothes shopping than bright and early!” you chirped, holding up another sundress that was on clearance and raising an eyebrow at Joe, who nodded slowly.

He was still half-asleep, following you through this department store clearance section in search of summer clothing that you could use on your vacation with his family over the New Year’s holiday. You’d dragged your boyfriend out of bed at nine a.m. to get ready to go to the mall, and he hadn’t mentally left bed yet, despite the fact that he was here between overloaded racks of clothing with you.

“I like the color,” he mumbled, almost incoherently. Then, he narrowed his ochre eyes and looked above your head for a moment, processing something briefly. His eyes flitted back down to meet your questioning gaze. “I don’t follow?”

“Clothes shopping in the morning?” you clarified, Joe nodding and making a quiet noise of surprise when you suddenly started off towards the fitting rooms. He followed swiftly, watching the material of the sundress whip around your legs and wondering why he’d even crawled out of bed in the first place. You snickered at a prolonged yawn he let out, then glanced over your shoulder. “Morning skinny, you know?”

“I…” he trailed off, inhaling sharply and running his tongue over his lower lip. “What? I still don’t follow. Did you say morning skinny? That sounds like a latte.”

“You sound like a latte,” you retorted halfheartedly, earning a snort from Joe despite your lame attempt at a comeback while you were escorted to one of the many available fitting rooms. “Morning skinny, Joe, do you really not know what that means?”

“I must have lived under a rock until now, because I’m still imagining an overpriced latte. Or maybe it’s just wishful thinking.”

He had to smile a bit at the contagious giggles you let out as you hung your clothes on the hook inside the little fitting area, the door swinging shut and separating you from him for the moment. Glancing around, he decided to just lean up against the wall next to the door, resting his head against it and groaning softly. Even closing his eyes for a moment threatened to lull him off into dreamland, but your voice drew him back out of the sleepy state he was in, so he tried to focus on your voice and your voice only as you changed into the dress.

“Morning skinny is when you wake up and you haven’t eaten in over 9 hours so you’re hella skinny until breakfast because there’s nothing to take up space in your stomach.” Squinting, Joe frowned a bit. “So shopping in the morning is nice because you aren’t bloated from all the food you’ve eaten during the day.”

“I never notice a difference about you in the morning. You’re always skinny. Skinny Minnie.”

“Joe,” you deadpanned. “Flattery will get you…. nowhere.”

“False,” he retorted, raising an eyebrow as you opened the door and emerged in the sundress, a quizzical expression on your face. “Flattery got me here. At 10 in the morning. With my cute, insufferably chipper girlfriend who looks like she’s about to drop me for not knowing the difference between an empty stomach and a shitty coffee drink.” When you just continued to stare, Joe offered a sheepish smile. “But she still looks cute, I said?”

“Help me, please,” you asked, rolling your eyes playfully as you headed over to the large mirrors to your left, holding up the ties that were to rest around your neck and brushing your hair to the side. “I don’t want my tits to be falling out around your family.”

“Oooh!” Joe grinned in amusement as he came to stand behind you, his lithe, long fingers coming up to gently retrieve the straps from your fingers. As he tied, he wiggled his eyebrows and made eyes at you in the mirror, making you laugh and shake your head. “Sorry, the image…. It was titillating.”

Snorting, you swept your hair back into place when Joe finished, moving his hands to your hips instead, and you could see a mischievous smile on his face as he rested his chin on top of your head. Swaying back and forth gently, he took you with him as you both admired the sundress in the mirror, a satisfied hum leaving your lips. “Not bad.”

“Not bad?” Joe cried out indignantly, not even looking the slightest bit embarrassed when you shushed him. But he lowered his volume anyways, gasping in shock at your declaration of just ‘not bad’ to your outfit. He was definitely more awake now. “Babe, you look hot. I wish I was cross-eyed so I could see how beautiful you are twice.” That got a giggle from you, and you leaned back into him when his arms snaked around your waist, pulling you closer. “What? You like those corny lines?”

“They are… endearing, I guess,” you admitted, resting your hands on top of his and smiling when he started rubbing circles into your tummy with his thumb.

“And here I was thinking that a pretty girl actually fell for me because of my dashing good looks.” His voice was teasing, clearly not serious, but you still rolled your eyes at the sentiment and turned to face him, draping your arms over his shoulders and running a hand over the back of his hair. Humming in appreciation, he leaned into your touch, smiling fondly down at you and making your heart race the same way it had every day since you’d met him. He watched an amazed smile manifest on your lips, and he raised an eyebrow in question, swaying back and forth with you once more. “What’s wrong? Do I look sick?” When you shook your head quickly and grinned even wider, Joe grinned right back, moving his hands to your back and leaning in to kiss you gently. As he did, he dipped you backwards a bit and murmured against your lips, “My doctor did say I’m lacking some Vitamin U.”

“Oh my god, you ham,” you groaned playfully, ducking away from his kiss and instead receiving a peppering of kisses to your shoulder as one of his hands snuck to pinch your ass playfully. Giggling and relishing in the euphoria of your boyfriend’s attention, you almost didn’t notice the salesperson walk in, but the stink-eye you got from her when you looked over Joe’s shoulder was enough to send you into a flustered state, Joe whining as you slipped out of his arms and hurried back into the fitting room.

“Did I do something wrong?” he asked, turning around and meeting gazes with the salesperson, who gave him an identical look that made him let out a quiet ‘oooooh’ before turning back around. “Shit, my bad. Sorry!” Leaning back up against the wall next to the door, he pressed his cheek to the wallpaper, appreciating the coolness against his reddened cheeks as he spoke again. “You’re getting the sundress, right?”

“Uh, fucking duh,” came your quiet reply from the other side of the door, and Joe grinned as he closed his eyes again, waiting for you to change into the next outfit. When you finally emerged in a crop top and shorts, Joe let his sleepy hazel eyes flutter open and subsequently widen. His finger came to his mouth as he turned quickly to see if the salesperson had disappeared, which she had not. So, he bit down on his finger instead, cursing under his breath and making you laugh at his antics as you went out to the mirror again, purposely avoiding the gaze of the worker who wanted nothing more than to kick you both out right now. “What do you think?” you asked, turning and looking at the outfit from multiple angles before catching Joe’s eye through the mirror. He was torn between watching you and eyeing the salesperson warily, but he shuffled over to stand behind you anyways, resting his chin on your head while spreading out his hand and pressing it to your exposed stomach.

“Skinny latte,” he offered, making you laugh as you pulled his hand away and turned to face him, lacing your fingers together.

“Morning skinny, Joe. Morning. Skinny.”

“You should just give up now, I’m never going to remember what the hell morning skinny is,” he admitted, grinning and pulling your hand up to his height so he could press a couple soft kisses to your knuckles. Then, he spun you around in a circle, chuckling when you let out a soft giggle at the movement. “I love the outfit. You always look stunning in everything.”

“Then you are the worst person to bring shopping!” you teased, giving his hand a squeeze before letting go and heading back into the fitting room. He leaned against the door as it clicked shut, shoving his hands in his coat pocket as you continued. “I want to go shopping with someone who’s going to roast me if I put on an outfit that isn’t cute, you know! Not someone who’s going to lie and say I look cute in every single item of clothing I put on.”

“But you do look cute in every single item of clothing you put on!” he countered, pouting a bit when you groaned in response and continued pulling on the next outfit. “I’m serious! You’re a certified model, you can’t look bad in anything! The world envies you!”

There was a moment of silence as you finished pulling on the outfit, and Joe furrowed his eyebrows, quickly standing as the door flew open, revealing you in a gaudy red romper that looked cuter on the hanger than it did on you, or any person for that matter. There was probably a reason it was marked down, after all.

“Then what’s this?” you demanded, Joe biting his lip before a moment to stifle a laugh before reaching out to fix the sleeve a little bit. You saw the smothered smile that he was holding back, and you struggled to hide your own smile at his contagious amusement.

“A sexy fire hydrant?” he attempted, laughing when you rolled your eyes playfully and shut the door on him. “Come on, two out of three outfits is good! You did good!”

“I’m glad you at least didn’t try to hype this one up. I might have cried,” you admitted, biting back your laughter and changing back into your winter clothes again. “But you’re right. Two out of three is good. And I’m fucking starving.”

“Morning skinny not so much fun after all?” Joe snickered, joining you at your side when you finally emerged with the two outfits you’d chosen. When you shook your head, he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and squeezed you gently, chuckling at your feigned annoyance. “See, I remembered it then. Where do you want to eat, sweetcheeks?”

“Honestly, IHOP sounds so good right now,” you whined, leaning against his side a little as you headed back out to the registers, thoughts of strawberry crepes and hash browns swirling in your mind.

“Don’t need to go to IHOP to give you that breakfast sausage,” he intoned as he leaned over to press a nonchalant kiss to your head. The double meaning didn’t pass over your head for even a moment, and your jaw dropped as you looked up at him, your elbow digging into his side gently and making him laugh. “It was funny! Come on!”

“You’re filthy,” you muttered, giving him one more glance before you couldn’t help but smile a bit. Keeping your eyes trained forwards, you added, “But it was kind of funny.”

Joe cheered at your admission, lifting a fist and shaking it in victory before pressing another obnoxiously loud kiss to your head. “I’ve tainted you beyond repair! God, this vacation is going to be so much fun.”

“No breakfast sausage jokes on the vacation,” you groaned as you made your way back through the clearance racks, resting your head on his shoulder. “Or any jokes like that, god. If you want to… just say it.”

“Okay, well, that eliminates like…. 90% of my repertoire,” he mused, pouting his lips a little bit as he wracked his brain for new ideas. “Not even a little corn dog action? Only want my meat when I got bread?”

“Who invited you on this trip? Can I cancel my ticket?”

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har-rison-s · 6 years ago

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care for you

roger taylor blurb

request: If your requests are still open is it okay if you write an fluffy one shot with Rog looking after the reader after she has surgery or something cus we all know he did biology in uni and has some medical training so he can be like super cute and protective

A/N: Awwwwwhhhh I almost cried while writing this. I've had like one or two serious surgeries done on me and they weren't something that major, but still. I remember how it is recovering from one. I did my best on this, and bear with me because I've never written something like this before. Hope this meets your standarts. Happy reading!

main masterlist

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warnings: the surgery description isn't too detailed, but it sure is unpleasant (as much as the process) to read about and imagine, so sorry for that. It's just for context.

A/N: I LOVE HIM!!

“Ow, ow, ow, that hurts!” You wince, your grimace changing and Roger immediately stopping his movements. The medicated cotton pad stains his fingers and he looks at you through his glasses.

“It stings, doesn't it?” He asks and you nod, face still pulled in a pained expression. “It'll be over in a jiffy, we have to clean up the bruise, love.” Roger tells you and you groan, not wanting to endure anything uncomfortable anymore, although your everyday life for the next month or two will be nothing but uncomfortable. “Hold on to the pillow, squeeze it as tight as you need.” You nod, giving up and Roger concentrates back on your foot. “Ready?” He asks and you nod again.

The dark brown essence cuts through the cotton pad and leaks onto your sensitive skin and flesh under it. You groan, feeling tears coming, and squeeze the pillow so thight that you could slash it open. The essence stings so bad, it feels like your feet are on fire. You hate the feeling, but you have to bear it. For your own sake.

Two days ago, you were released from the hospital where surgeons cut out the grown-in nails in your big toes and some other fingers. Yes, it's very detailed and disgusting, but it had to be done, otherwise there was a threat of amputatin your toes. And you'd like to have them in place very much.

You hiss and sigh when Roger's done with the procedure and you fall against the couch, a wave of relief washing over you. Roger leaves to throw out the cotton pads and wash his hands, and you look at your disgusting-looking toes. “Blergh.” You say and withdraw your eyes from the sight. And they smell, too, thanks to the medication and flesh and everything else.

Roger comes back and you look at him. “I never want to do that again.” You tell him while he wraps your toes in pads and gauze. Roger raises his eyebrows, sighs and shrugs.

“We both know that's not possible.” He tells you and you nod, letting out a pained hum. “At least it's me that's doing it.”

“Well, you would be a doctor if you hadn't become a drummer, so you're just as horrible as them.” You say. Roger chuckles.

“Hey, it's the medication that's mean, not us.” He defends himself. “Besides, your home doctor's not so horrible at giving orgasms, isn't he?” Roger winks at you and you poke him with the heel of your foot. He laughs.

“How is it looking down there?” You ask, biting your lip from the inside in nervousness.

“Ugly and stinky,” Roger replies and you sigh, “but, it's started to heal.”

“Already?” You widen your eyes. He nods and finishes patching you up. He comes to lay next to you on the couch. “I'm sorry that you have to go through all that.” You tell him and Roger looks at you, shaking his head.

“Don't you apologise.” He says to you and you let out a quiet 'humph'. Roger traces circles into your shoulder, his arm over your frame. You lean your head into his neck, relaxing. “You had to bear that horrible pain for more than three years—which I still don't understand—and you've finally got rid of it. Surgeries are never pleasant, so don't apologise to me for the things I have to do for you.”

“Alright, alright, I'll try not to.” You tell him. “It's already unbearable for me, so I don't want you doing anything you don't want to.”

Roger shakes his head again. “With you, that's never going to happen.” He says. You smile.

“There was even a possibility of me never walking again.” You say quietly, huffing afterwards.

“Don't think about that, my darling.” Roger says. “But I'd always be your legs if you couldn't walk, and I promise you that. After a month or two, when you'll be completely back on your feet, that thought won't even cross your mind. You're going to be alright.” He tells you and bumps your nose with his, making you giggle. Roger then stands up, puts his hands on his hips and looks down at you. You pout at losing him on the couch. He sees you've brought out your lower lip and sighs. “We gotta go to bed.” Roger tells you and you roll your eyes. “C'mon, sit up, and let's go.”

You do as he says, and Roger puts one of his arms on your back, gripping your arm, and the other slips under your knees. He lifts you with ease and starts to carry you to your shared bedroom. You smile at him, watching his beautiful face as he looks at where he's going.

He carefully puts you down onto the bed, and your feet still hurt, so you hiss. Roger immediately looks at you, worried. You gesture for your feet and he presses kisses all over your face. He makes you sputter and giggle again, you're trying to push him away from you with your little hands, but Roger only takes them between his hands and pins them down at your sides. He kisses you deeply and you relax against him once again.

His wet kisses trail all over your face again after kissing you and you can't help laughing. “Stop, stop.” You protest, but Roger only adds tickling your sides with his fingers, and you can't breathe from the laughing. “We have to—” a fit of giggles, “—we had to go to b—bed, didn't—didn't we?” You manage to ask him between your giggles, and now Roger's laughing.

“Alright.” He says and gives you a tired smile, stopping his tickling assault on you. Roger gives you a kiss on the lips and then walks away from the bed, stalking towards your cabinet of clothes. “What pyjamas are we feeling tonight? Hot pink or dark blue?”

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shijiujun · 6 years ago

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history3 ep 9 summary - AKA SHAO FEI IS JEALOUS FOR 26 WHOLE MINUTES

GUYS YOU GONNA DIE OF LAUGHTER THIS EP OMFGGG WTF JUST HAPPENED?!!! although the jealousy was a bit much man

WE START OFF WHERE WE LEFT OFF LAST WEEK - OFFICE + ANDY

we start off with the massage scene again and oooh seductive andy’s tone as he tells tang yi to relax - nice hands and totally hypnotising YOU GO ANDY

bodydumb and shao fei teaming up is hilarious AND OMG so andy bends down to the floor like we all saw last week, and that’s when both bodydumb and shao fei literally gasp like HORRIFIED and just barge into the room to grab andy up and shao fei is all “what the fuck are you doing why are you crouching down what position is this?!”

CUE SLY ANDY JUMPING UP, POUTING AND THEN HIDING BEHIND TANG YI: “ah yi, this person is so fierce i’m so scared”

shao fei: “i’m now tang yi’s bodyguard and i feel that you’re dangerous and problematic so leave right now”

bodydumb at shao fei: “hey why are you snatching my job?!”

“WHAT’S WRONG WITH THE BOTH OF YOU, AM I BACTERIA?!” - ANDY at shao fei and bodydumb WTF HAHAHAHAHA

omg andy is squatting down on purpose to fuck with them I LOVE HIM

THE NEXT SCENE - they move to the restaurant and geez where is andy GIVE ME MY ANDY but anyway SHAO FEI IS TOTES ANGRY AT TANG YI AND THEY’RE AT THE RESTAURANT AND OMG BODYDUMB YOU HAVE BEEN UPGRADED TO BODYGUARD HE TOTALLY SAW THE ATMOSPHERE AND WAS LIKE ALRIGHT TIME TO FUCKING EXIT instead of sitting around and watch th both of them

omgggggg shao fei is so jealous he’s eating so damn hard and noisily and tang yi is just laughing at him and he CHOKES HE FUCKING CHOKES because he’s eating so damn hard and angrily and tang yi just laughs at him he can’t take it anymore

tang yi insists that they’re friends - shao fei is like: “what kind of friends? there are the ones that go for karaoke, the friends that you exercise with.... and then then kind that do the OTHER kind of exercise, which kind are you guys?!” and after a while of him just talking tang yi interrupts him and goes: “are you trying to understand or are you jealous?”

SHAO FEI, WITHOUT HESITATION: “BOTH!!!!”

and then he denies it as he mutters to himself, and just look at how gleeful and happy tang yi is wtaf and then shao fei goes on and on about how andy has a boyfriend and what if his boyfriend came to find trouble with you? you already have so many enemies, now you want to add on another love-enemy?”

tang yi: “you’re thinking too much”

shao fei goes on as if he didn’t hear him: “you never know, things are crazy nowadays, did you see the news?!!!! etc. etc. especially because you’re so charismatic?!”

and tang yi just takes the praise in stride it’s amazing - and then because shao fei is so damn angry tang yi i think purposely picks up shao fei’s coke and drinks it with the spicy dish they’re having, and as expected, shao fei pauses in his tirade and goes: “hey, you’re drinking coke now?”

and tang yi NODS

OMFGGGGG CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT - TANG YI IS SWEET!!! and shao fei spoils the moment (or makes it better, it’s up to interpretation): “you’re drinking my saliva (from the coke)”

OMGGGGG THE LADDER BODYGUARD DUDE IS QUITE HANDSOME TOO NO?!!!!

JACK is totally jealous that zhao zi is touching some other dude’s pecs and man-boobs, so he’s totally like come touch mine zhao zi don’t touch that old man’s!!!!

jack: “if you want, you can come check mine (muscles)”

he’s totally flirting, but zhao zi is like: “okay! you promised, no take backs, you can’t be shy on me later”

jack: “me? i think you’re the one who will be scared” (BECAUSE THEY ARE THINKING OF DIFFERENT THINGS)

zhao zi: “this is nothing, back in the academy, i’ve even seen guys butt naked etc. etc.” - dear lord zhao zi you’ve got no idea, you’ve got NO IDEA HOW MUCH jack is thirsting over ur ass

more zhao zi and grandma backstory: SNIFFLES grandma died in his second year of police academy and paid for his education, but didn’t live to see him graduate, and i SWEAR IF JACK DIDN’T ALR LOVE HIM HE DOES NOW?!

OMG ZHAO ZI CAN U BE MORE STEADY THAT WASN’T LIKE A FLIMSY LADDER?! anw they fall into the pool like in the trailer and omg i love them, and because jack is wearing a white see-through shirt which is totes translucent when he stands up from the pool and zhao zi is totally drooling at his man-boobs and then jack goes: “you’re kidding, you want to check now?!”

HONG YE walks past with Dao Yi, she’s here to discuss smth with Tang yi and waiting for him to come back and then she sees Jack and Zhao Zi in the pool and is like WTF - zhao zi recognises her face from interviews and tv that she’s done (probably for the company etc.) and intros himself as a police and then she ‘s like HMPH WTF and then stomps into the house

LOL - “HONG YE LOOKS LIKE MY GRANDMA” - ZHAO ZI QUOTE OF THE YEAR he’s damn lucky hong ye wasn’t in earshot when he said that she would have DESTROYED HIM

i wanna explain more about hong ye and glasses guy dao yi but i’ll do that after i get this out in full - in any case, she wants him, he obviously likes her, but refuses to be her boyfriend because he is having a dilemma, considering that he’s watched her grow up and also protected her since she was younger in a sense, he’s finding it hard to decide whether to treat her as his charge or a woman that can be his girlfriend

LOLOLOLOL

OMGGGG HOT DOCTOR?!!!!!!!!

tang yi: “we’re here because i need to repay a debt”

shao fei: “what debt? why must you do it here?”

HOT DOCTOR POPS UP: “because there’s a bed~” - wow hot doctor way to go way to make shao fei go even more mad and jealous

OMFG - SHAO FEI’S EYES WHEN TANG YI STRIPS OFF CLOSE YOUR DAMN MOUTH FLIES ARE GONNA GO IN

OMFGGGGGGGGGG SHAO FEI PLSSSS

you guys can imagine what happens inside and what shao fei hears before barging in, things like “oh this is my first time, am i using too much force? etc. etc.” - of course, of course

after shao fei barges in, gapes at tang yi, tang yi shooing him off cutely like he would his husband or lover, and then shao fei stomping out-

doctor dude at shao fei: “wow, wasn’t he a bit too angry?” - YEAH DOC YOU DON’T SAY

HE’S STILL ANGRY OMG SHAO FEI - “is your body meant for other people to touch?!!!!”

OH JESUS BASICALLY TANG YI SHRUGS OFF HIS JACKET AND PUFFS UP HIS CHEST AND GOES: “here you go, you wanna touch?!!!”

good on you shao fei, you didn’t take the bait like zhao zi did - he stomps into the house, goes to the fridge, grabs a drink, and then while pouting and obviously jelly still, he presses the drink to tang yi, and tang yi SMILES omgggg he’s killing me with his smiles

omg poooooor bodyguard - he thinks tang yi doesn’t know that shao fei likes him, so he’s trying to tell tang yi that shao fei has other motivations against him aka shao fei is lusting over him, but tang yi already knows?!!! tang yi tells bodyguard that if he cannot control himself, he’ll transfer him out of the house

OH SHIT: bodyguard goes outside, idk who the hell he is talking to but he says over the phone - “hey, it’s me, do you have time to meet?” - he’s definitely meeting a bad person, it could be hong ye but at this point it doesn’t look like it but it could be anyone’s guess

scene at tang yi’s office - he feels the tension between hong ye and dao yi, and basically she wants to make dao yi jealous and mad, so when dao yi suggests a project for tang yi to do, she steps in and goes: “i don’t think we should spend so much money on the project, can you loan me some people and i’ll do a site visit myself to check?”

and then she sees shao fei buddying up with the guy outside - LOL SHAO FEI LEGIT IS GANGSTERBAIT?!!!! EVERYONE ELSE LOVES HIM AND HE’S FRIENDLY W EVERYONE I HOPE

she sees him and she’s like: “i’ve been really good haven’t i? then i wanna go shopping, i want officer meng to guard me while i shop”

and dao yi is like GASPS: “no, miss, i’ll-”

hong ye: “it’s such a waste for a policeman like him to just stay in here doing nothing, he might as well protect me”

shao fei in the end, even though he protests a bit, but - omggggg the way shao fei listens to tang yi without much argument i love it, tang yi says that protecting hong ye is like protecting her, so shao fei smiles, nods, and goes, but not before saying to hong ye: “what is the worst that could happen (on the trip)?” - WOW FORESHADOWING, GOOD JOB SCRIPTWRITERS FINALLY ON THIS PART

i kind of liked this scene because it shows us the hong ye-shao fei sibling rivalry dynamic - challenging, but healthy challenging rather than heated, harsh barbs aimed to murder each other

okay at this point: we can CONFIRM more or less that the person on the photo isn’t glasses guy Dao Yi, because right after hong ye and shao fei leaves, tang yi is very friendly and warm towards dao yi: “if you won’t promise her, you can’t blame her for treating you like this”

dao yi: “it’s not that i won’t, it’s that i can’t”

tang yi: “if you think too much, you’ll just hurt each other”

it ends there - so GUYS we know we have the shooting tmr and hong ye’s shady scene, i really don’t think hong ye is evil at this point, but she could be doing something she thinks is in tang yi’s and the organization’s best interests, but is doing more harm than good - during the earlier scene in the ep w her and dao yi, dao yi mentions that she shouldnt be so concerned with how other ppl will view Xing Tian Meng and whether they would wanna do business with them because their company and the organization is all legal and clean now, so there’s no matter - but then hong ye replies: “that’s only when we’re FULLY legal and clean, not now” - it’s strange that she would make such a distinction, so i guess she is doing something shady but not totally evil, and my take is that when shao fei gets hurt for it, she feels guilty

or she could be the person bodyguard is meeting?!!!

OR MAYBE I’M THINKING TOO MUCH INTO THIS GUYS

#history 3: 圈套 #history3圈套 #history 3: trapped #history3: trap #summary #KILL ME NOW #history3 spoilers

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wikipediathefreeencyclopedia · 6 years ago

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compilation of my favorite otp prompts 5

tag

cute weather/seasonal AUs your OTP [x]

when it rains

who wears the designer raincoat/umbrella set and who is wearing oversized polkadot rainboots and a huge yellow duck raincoat

going for a walk in the rain and splashing in puddles

which one seduces the other into standing under a tree before shaking the branch and soaking them

gOING SWIMMING IN THE RAIN and making out maybe

fall (aka autumn)

who buys mulled cider, who buys hard cider

who wears the really intense halloween costume, who wears a sheet with holes in it

snow/winter

Who builds the snowman, who eats the carrot nose bc they weren’t paying attention (”OH THATS what the carrot was for, my bad”)

oh no we stayed out too long and need to warm up better share the shower/hot chocolate to conserve resources

person A burying person B in snow and then kissing their forehead and walking away (“YOU MOTHERFUCKER YOU CANT LEAVE ME HERE” “I love you too I’ll be back!” “EXCUSE ME”)

imagine your competitive otp [x]

making ridiculous bets on whose wind-up toy will win the race (may include sabotage)

having a food competition (with a food both of them hate)

having a cake-baking competition

sabotaging each other in mario kart

Some height difference things for your OTP [x]

The taller one sitting on the floor between the shorter one’s knees as the shorter one braids/plays with their hair.

The shorter one tackle-hugging the taller one when they come home from some sort of trip, hoping that they’ll both fall to the floor in a pile of limbs and cuddles/kisses, but unfortunately the shorter one isn’t strong/heavy enough and they both remain standing.

Bonus: to compensate, the taller one decides to pick the shorter one up.

The shorter one having to sprawl like half their body across the taller one whenever they ride the bus/train so as to give the taller one all the leg room.

Or, the shorter one sitting down and immediately noticing that their feet don’t touch the floor, becoming embarrassed by this, and then pretending that they’d rather just snuggle up super tight with the taller one.

Bonus: the taller one realizes exactly what’s going on but says nothing. Or teases them endlessly about it, up to you.

The shorter one physically sitting in the taller one’s lap.

The taller one standing behind the shorter one and putting their arms around their shoulders, then resting their chin on top of the shorter one’s head.

Bonus if they’re watching the stars/sunset/ocean together.

Imagine your OTP: Orchestra edition [x]

‘I didn’t bring my music but you gave me your extra copy and I blurted out that I loved you, and we could have awkwardly moved past that but then you accidentally said that you loved me back’

‘I was in the very back row of your concert so I could barely see the stage but I was so impressed with your performance that I decided to hang around and see if I could meet you, and it turns out that you are actually very cute holy shit’

AU List #3 (Theme: Jobs/Work) [x]

“You stood up for me against that really rude costumer who almost made me cry, thank you.”

random aus to consider though [x]

we pulled an all nighter trying to play monopoly and i think i may have confessed some weird shit

Hospital OTP Prompts [x]

I’m a bit loopy on the drugs they gave me for the pain and I told you that I love you and it’s the only thing I remember afterwards AU

The doctor is constantly telling you off cause you keep making my heart beat go faster when you’re talking to me AU

Things I need to be written [x]

person B is a half mermaid and person A orders the salmon for the both of them

Who wants some AUs? [x]

“‘You’re gonna get a cold if you stand out in the rain!’” AU

“I’m on the swings at the park and looking real depressed why did you come over to talk to me?” AU

Weird OTP Prompts for all your fanfiction needs [x]

You’re colourblind, and I managed to get you glasses that will let you see all the colours, but instead of being amazed, you’re just really offended by the colour purple, and you’re yelling at me for wearing a purple shirt.

“Do you masturbate?” “I–I’m sorry, do I know you?” “No, now answer the question.”

I’m colourblind, and you gave me these really awesome glasses that let me see colour, and I’m pretending to really hate the colour purple because I want you to take your shirt off. But really, purple is a fucking ugly colour.

Some of my actual experiences in musicals/plays... [x]

hey we’ve never talked before so now we’re playing love interests how about that AU

hey we’ve been good friends for years so now we’re playing love interests how about that AU

I play a police officer and at one point I get to arrest and drag your character offstage and I’m having a little too much fun with it AU

Did somebody say OTP PROMPTS? [x]

Person A dips Person B (like the dance move, but then get distracted and drops them).

A walking in on B absolutely killing it at Just Dance.

Person B wins Person A a gigantic stuffed animal at the fair.

Person B reading to Person A on the couch to help them fall asleep.

A and B having no mercy on each other in Super Smash Bros.

Person A playfully teasing Person B about how cute they are.

your otp finding each other annoyingly endearing [x]

you’re so stoic or deadpan most of the time but when you get flustered your face lights up red like a beacon and it’s so cute.

you have no idea what personal space is and it’s really distracting when your face is two inches away from mine, what if i turn my head and accidentally kiss you

you don’t like snuggling or a lot of touching but when you’re asleep you’re a cuddler for better or for worse

MORE AUs for you [x]

you’re a magician and you pick me to be your assistant for a trick but the real magic is how you managed to slip your phone number to me while you were sawing me in half au

I made my thousandth paper crane and wished to find my soulmate and the next day you move in next door to me what does this mean au

AUs based (loosely) on things that have happened to me recently [x]

I just watched you fill up a container with dry dog food biscuit by biscuit what the hell are you doing

76 OTP prompts list [x]

Person B is reeaaaaaally tired, but Person A is super, super energetic and loud. Trying to get Person A to shut up, Person B kisses Person A.

Imagine person A of your OTP relentlessly flirting with B in public, just to see B blush.

Imagine Person A of your OTP seeing Person B with bed hair for the first time, and being totally blown away by how cute/hot/etc. they look with their hair being a huge mess. Bonus: if Person A gets flustered when Person B pokes fun at them for liking it.

Imagine your OTP getting in a fight and one of them yelling that they love the other one and then it gets really quiet.

Imagine your OTP cuddling under a blanket on a cold winter night. Person A gently wrapping their arms around Person B and lightly kissing down their neck making Person B shiver from something other than the cold outside.

Imagine your OTP running into each other under the mistletoe. Person A blushes and goes to suggest that they don’t have to kiss but Person B cuts them off with a kiss.

Imagine person A walking out of the bathroom after a shower, half-naked and wreathed in steam, and B immediately dropping whatever they were holding. Bonus if it’s an animal which gives them the stink eye before slinking away.

Imagine your OTP living in a dorm. Person A thinks that person B is kinda cute, but otherwise doesn’t feel much for them. Person A goes to borrow a textbook from person B and walks in on person B in their pajamas with their hair all messed up and person A thinks it’s the cutest thing ever.

Imagine person A of your otp is reading a book late at night and person B can’t sleep so they ask person A to read to them so person A starts reading out loud and a few minutes later person B is completely knocked out and person A gives them a kiss on their forehead.

Being on the brink of admitting their feelings for each other but then getting interrupted.

“You were trying to reach for a box of cereal and a whole shelf’s-worth of cereal boxes fell on you here let me help”

OTP Prompts [x]

Imagine Person A seeing Person B and just having the most powerful, undeniable urge to have sex. Just out of the blue with no provocation except for Person B’s existence. Bonus if they’re having conflicting feelings about acting upon the urge because they’re in public.

no title [x]

‘i keep bumping into you everywhere and you’re starting to get weirded out but i’m not stalking you it’s just a string of coincidences i swear no wait let me explain’ au

Random OTP Prompts [x]

Everyone I talk to mentions you at some point and I didn’t get it but now we’ve met and I do. I definitely do.

We knew each other when we were like 2 years old because our moms are friends and we haven’t seen each other since but now your family is visiting and you’re a lot hotter than you were when you were a toddler.

Everyone thinks I have a crush on your friend but actually I like you which is even more embarrassing.

Reunited AUs [x]

“we’re texting for the first time in forever and i told you about some stupid thing i did and sent a sarcastic ‘you must really miss me, huh’ and you just replied ‘yes’ and i think my heart just broke” au

Spoopy Halloween AU’s for ur OTP!!! [x]

we were supposed to go on a double date to this horror movie but neither of our dates showed up and it’s really just our friends trying to get us together

we both got dragged to this stuffy Halloween party by our parents wanna kiss in the corner?

#writing #writing prompts #otp prompts #au prompts #prompt list #compilation of writing prompts #otp aus

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sweetpeachjones · 6 years ago

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YMUB pt. 7

Episode 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 , 6

A/N: Thank you for putting up with me

For my anon n @pupyluv247 xoxoxo

"Ugh, why is it so damn hot in Oakland?" You lie in your silk sheets tossing and turning desperately trying to find some comfort. It wasn't the temperature that had you going crazy like, your hormones were raging. It has been 3 weeks since you moved out and got your own place. Three weeks since you and Erik spoke. He would call and you ignored his calls you ended up changing your number altogether. He would come by the office and your secretary would block him. If he got belligerent security was called and he would leave but Erik was persistent and it was a matter of time before you had to face him. You decided on taking a cold shower before drifting off to sleep, however, your cell phone was almost begging you to call Erik. He didn't know where you lived and tonight wasn't the time to found out. The glow of the phone irritated you so much that you took the battery out and put it in ur drawer. Only then you were able to get some rest. The next morning after finishing your first appointment, you were waiting for your second when you received a call from the University. "Hello Mrs. Stevens" "Yes" "Oh hello this is Shelia from the Black Excellence committee and I wanted to inform you that you and your husband are going to be nominated with humanitarian of the year award." "Oh wow well I'm honored." "I'm glad you are you guys have done so much work for our city and beyond it's time you have been recognized. So the ceremony is Aug 11 a month from now and I will email you further details okay." "Okay, thanks so much." "No thank you and have a wonderful day." As soon as you hung up your secretary buzzed in about Erik calling. You told your secretary to say you were in a meeting. As your second appointment walked in. At 5 pm you prepared to leave as you walked out the door you smelled some familiar cologne you knew immediately who it was, you reached into your pocket and grabbed hold of your switchblade just in case. You stalking me now." You said flatly and kept walking. You didn't have to look back to know he was following you. "You can't keep ignoring me Y/N" "Wanna bet, what do you want" "You of course" "Oh thought I was unless to you." You turned as you walked in the parking deck Erik quickly follow seeing you walked to an unfamiliar car.

"What's this?, Where's your car?"

"None of your business but I bought this baby as soon as I moved out. I figured you would have some sort of tracker and found out where I am." You fiddled with the keys as you dropped them in water the other day, it has been malfunctioning since then. You pressed the unlock button only to have the car alarm go off. Frustrated u bang the keys on the roof, Erik silently watched you throw a temper tantrum. He calmly grabbed the keys from you pressed on some buttons, silenced the alarm and unlock your car door. He opened the door for you and waited til u got in. You said nothing as u got in and he slammed the door. You wanted to wipe that stupid smirk off his face as he waited for you to say something. You didn't you just started the car. "Is there something else you need." "Yeah, did u get the call from the school,?" "I did, and?" "Sooo we need to make arrangements to pick up" "No I'll meet you a block from the venue and we will ride up together so no one is suspicious." "Why can't I pick u up" "You seriously need to ask me that question, move out my damn way." You put the car in drive and pulled off unnecessarily hard. He jumped back just in time before you ran over his toes. The night of the ceremony You spent all day with your stylist and glam squad aka your sister and boy cousin and they primped and prepped for tonight evening. You settled on a rose gold evening gown with diamond accessories. Once done you looked like an Aphrodite herself. You had an Uber XL bring you to the designated spot you and Erik agreed upon. Erik was leaning against the car looking up and down the street apprehensively waiting on your vehicle. Once the driver pulled up he open your car door and you stepped out. Erik's jaw dropped as you walked towards him. He was looking extra delicious in his black tux and gold accessories. His gold slugs gleamed at you when his smiled and held out his arms awaited a hug. You hesitated but he wasn't having that as he pulled you in a tight bear hug. You almost melted being in those strong arms and he had the nerve to wear your favorite cologne you bought him. He was making it damn near making possible to have an orgasm off sight and smell alone. His hands were dangerously close to your ass as you pulled away. Any fondling and you would just have to have him. "Erik we have to go" We have time, he said as he leaned in closer to kiss your neck "Uh huh I ain't here for all of that." Girl bring your sexy ass here, grabbing ur waist, we need to get in character. Finally kissing his way on your neck and earlobe. You were minutes from giving in. "Erik", you whispered "Yea baby", he answered as his hands were creeping under ur skirt. If he went any further it would have been game over. "If you don't get your fucking hands from under my skirt, I swear your eyes gonna match your outfit." And with that, you pushed him away. He sucked his teeth, knowing u want it just trying to fight but let you win this round. He Chuckled and said "okay princess off to the ball" holding the car door open. You glared at him for his little smart ass comment as you climb in the vehicle. He still managed to slap your ass HARD. One pulling up to the venue, the site was immaculate, you couldn't wait to get out the car. You almost felt intoxicated breathing the same air as Erik. You needed a drink fast. As you stepped people were calling you to take pics, you felt like a star because this was your nite, well yours and Erik. Y'all pose for several pictures but looking like the happiest couple in the world. If they only knew. Inside were pictures of you two at various points of your humanitarian work. Pictures of y'all with kids from Sudan, Nigeria, South Africa you working alongside women making dinner, pics of Erik building with hospitals and schools with the locals. Relief efforts after earthquakes and flooding both of y'all dirty from hard work but happier as ever. You almost felt nostalgic about how good you felt working and those happy faces of the people you help and the long steamy showers with Erik after a days work. It was too much emotion at once and you couldn't get to the open bar faster. As you made your way to the open bar Erik followed you like a hawk. “What would you like to drink ma'am?” “I'll have a whiskey.” “She will have apple cider” You looked at Erik with a fake smile. “Oh, honey, you are sweet but I got this”, adding venom in your voice. “I'm sure you do buttercup, just pace your self”, also adding base in his voice. The bartender looked confused feeling the conversation was deeper than face value. " I'll have a red wine please" Erik glared at you. "What doctors recommend at least one cup of red wine a day." Someone tapped you on your shoulder and turned to see a group of students that wanted to congratulate you personally. Among the crowd was Davida standing there looking bashful. You saw her and you attitude immediately went sour. Erik look shocked and nervous as he to was surprised she was here. He told her about but didn't think she would show up. You downed your first drink fast. "What the fuck are you doing here?", you whisper angrily. "Look Y/N, I didn't come here to fight or cause drama, I want to make amends with you and whether you like it not we're gonna be family." You stood in silence looking at her like she done lost her damn mind. Erik started to say something but you interrupted him you looked at her stepped closer so she can hear you. "I am not Erik so you can't-fool me. I know that baby is not his and your just looking for a meal ticket, if that's how you eat then fine but I'd be damn you ain't eating off MY plate." And you walked off leaving Erik confused about the conversation and Davida dumbfounded. The ceremony went lovely, you had just the kick in the ass you need to focus on the event and not think boning your sexy yet unfaithful husband. When it was time for you and Erik to accept your awards he spoke first. You kind of zoned out until he mentioned of opening a center for women's empowerment in your name. You were shocked to say the least and was speechless. Everyone clapped and cheered whispering amongst themselves. " Wow, such a beautiful couple. " Oh wish I had a marriage like that" Sadly the only ones who weren't fooled by the hype didn't clapped which was you, Erik, and Davida. You stepped outside to get some fresh air as took a sip of your drink a deep voice stirred you out your thoughts. You look to the sound and almost choked on your drink, It was your old mentor from grad school Ellis Watts. He was 6 years older and you guys had a hot sex fling for while Erik was back home and you were away at school. After all these years he still looked good. “OMG, what are you doing here?” “Well, I was in town and heard you were being honored so here I am.” Y'all embrace for what seemed longer than needed. You realized lots of people was around so you decided to go to this secluded spot in the gazebo in the backyard. "I'm so glad you came to support me, I figured we left things kinda weird." "Well I know you were just homesick and missing your boyfriend. But we did have some great times together., He sighed you it was hard to let you go, I thought about almost every day" "Hmm imagined if I didn't leave, where could we have been." "Are you having some kind of doubts about your marriage, are you happy?" You didn't answer as you tried to fight back tears. You wept silently as Ellis hugged you and let you cry. He rubbed your back to soothe you. You looked up at him as he was at least 5 inches taller than and pecked his lips as a thank you, the kiss got more intense as your arms moved to around his neck. The kiss ended abruptly when you heard a pounding thud and you open your eyes quick enough to see Ellis on the ground holding his jaw. Confused you see Erik in complete rage. He gave Ellis no time to recover as he pounces on him punching him in the face. Somehow Ellis overturned Erik and both were giving and taking blows. STOP IT, PLEASE STOP ERIK GET OFF HIM! you yelled. Erik stopped and look at you. Leave Erik! I'm not going nowhere until you come with me! You noticed a crowd was drawing and assume the cops were next. Fine just go I'll follow. He quickly left and you pulled some napkins out of your purse. I'm so sorry about that, you said as you cleaned Ellis's lips. That's fine really if I'd have you as my wife I'd be fighting anyone who looks your way. You laughed to yourself and finished cleaning him. Y/N!!!!! you heard Erik yell. "You better go, I'll take it from here." "Okay here's my card call me ok" You left just as quick to catch up with Erik. Both got into the car y'all came in and left. "Driver our house" "You mean your place, I don't live there anymore." "STFU, and why the fuck was you kissing on that nigga?" "You seriously asking me that while your baby mama pregnant AF at our event." "That's beside the point though, no knows the issue with her however you kissing another nigga who ain't your husband's at an event for us!" He had point but fuck him "Fuck u Erik I ain't gotta explain shit!" The rest of the drive was silent. Once the car pulled up, you quickly hopped out and stormed towards the door. Erik was right behind with you with the keys. When he opened the door, you started for the stairs but Erik grabbed your arm and swung you back to him and pinned you to the wall. He was still pissed. "So you fucking that nigga?" "Fuck u, Erik" "I'm not asking you again!" "Unlike the piece of shit, you are I don't have to fuck every dick that walks by." "That's cause you know that my pussy and can't no nigga fuck you like I can. How long as it been a month maybe two I know that pussy is wet AF right now begging to eaten and fuck properly.” You just turned your head cause he was absolutely right. Then he went for the kill sucking on your earlobe as his hands went under your dress. "Just as I thought", he picked you and found a better way to release his emotions. The next morning The sunlight plus the urge to pee woke you up. Erik has arm tightly around your ribcage keeping you snugly against him. You look down and you were completely naked. You subtle movement woke up the sleeping beast behind you "Where you going?" "I have to pee" "Mhmm well come back" He moved his arms like granted access. After you did your thing you looked in the mirror while you washed your hands. You noticed the passion marks and slight bruises over your neck and chest. Last night was everything you needed and more but you couldn't continue this cycle. You needed to leave. You snuck out the bathroom and went towards the dresser, you quietly got some casual clothes and almost melted how neat your drawers were. You kept your clothes in a certain way while Erik just threw his in the drawer. The fact he took the time to fix it how you like making you all warm and fuzzy inside. But damn that! You gather some more clothes shut the drawer quietly. The sound you heard almost made your heart stopped. “Where you going” “Huh” “I said where are you going, getting out of bed walking towards you.”

You looked like a deer in headlights didn't know your next move. “We're you leaving me?” “I can't stay here Erik” “Who said you can't your my wife this is your house.” He was getting loud almost frightening. He snatched the clothes out of hands and threw them across the room. "Oh you were gonna leave me and go with that nigga wasn't you. After I gave you something special something near and dear you gonna fuck a nigga and leave you got me FUCKED UP" he grabbed a glass vase of flowers and threw them across the room. You watched the water and flowers go everywhere but you couldn't let him intimidate you. "Oh save your bullshit Erik, we both know you bought that center out of guilt. And as much as you have been fucking around you should have no reason to question what I do." You stormed towards the door finding your courage but he blocked the door and got on his knees. He wrapped his arms around your waist. Okay, baby, I'm sorry. You're right, I'm trying to do better, I'd want to make this right. Please stay." His sniffing made your heart broke and you just wanted to lay in bed and cuddle and forget this ever happen. But it did and these are the consequences. "The only reason you want to make this right is that you got her pregnant. Now I looked past the other times but you are making a fool of me. And I can't be here for that now move I need to go." Erik stood up but his demeanor was deadly. "Fine you wanna take your ass to him then go." He reached behind him and locked both doors. "But you gotta find another way to leave other than this front door" "What negro move" Erik's was stiff as a boulder. He instead grabbed your arm and led you towards the balcony. Your first thought was he gonna throw you over so you kicked and screamed making it difficult. He pushed you on the balcony and locked the sliding glass door leaving you out by yourself. Erik, Erik open this damn door! You banged but to no avail, he didn't answer. He climbed back in bed and turned the TV up loud to drown you out. Frustrated you stop knocking and looked for a solution. You looked over and saw the pool, if you jumped you could make it, since you're on the third floor the deep end would have to be your target. But you wasn't much of a swimmer. You had no other option. And hitting the ground wasn't one of them. You looked behind you and Erik was facing you but looked at tv. You climbed over holding on the balcony as you made your jump. All Erik saw was your red shirt floating past the balcony rails. "I know this bitch didn't!" He ran downstairs as he saw your body enter the water in a weird way. Since you didn't bob back up he knew something was wrong and the blue liquid was starting to turn red. Oh, shit y/n! He yelled once he got to the patio. He dove in and retrieve your unconscious body. He gave you CPR as you weren't responding. "Come on baby breathe dammit" He blew one more time and pumped your chest until you spit up water. He was so happy he cradled your head in his arms and noticed the cut on your forehead. He carried you bridal style in the house as he went and got the first aid kit. You started to protest but he wasn’t having it. He just took care of cleaning you and laid in bed as the painkillers took effect. He didn't want it to happen this way but as far as you and he was concerned his wife was back.

@curls-and-crosses @killmoncoochie @killmongersgurl @pupyluv247 @kreolemami @dumbchick @thiccdaddy-mbaku @wakandan-aesthetic @errin261 @lunaerly @muse-of-mbaku @royallyprincesslilly @brownsugarcocoabutterwildflowers @nemesispawn @imgabbyrae @hausofgucci @inxan-ity@wakandalivesforever @killmvnger@whorderofthepheonix @goddessofthejungle @chaneajoyyy

@imaginewhoever @scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade @bezzywazhere @wakanda-inspired

#Erik Stevens #Erik Killmonger #erik x reader #erik killmonger smut #erik killmonger fanfic #black panther fanfiction

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moonlight-dragon · 6 years ago

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Allurance - Roommates AU (Home is where you are) CHAPTER 1

1733 words | Next Chapter

Lance sighed, burying himself in the couch while he waited for the arrival of his new roommate. Not like it was exactly his choice, but the conclusion of quite of a lot of coincidences.

When he had moved from Cuba, he knew he was going to share wherever place he found to live. Not because paying the bills would be easier -well, yes, that was rationally the reason- but because he wouldn’t be able to live in an empty house, no when he was so used to share everything with his brother, his sisters, his nephews, his mom, his dad, his abuela… He needed to feel there was people around him like he needed the sea of Varadero’s Beach, and his mom’s garlic knots.

And so, he felt so lucky finding Hunk, and later Keith as his roommates. Hunk was so friendly and an amazing cook and the nice scent always flooding the house whenever he cooked helped to not feel so homesick. That boy was a genius! Eating at home always felt like going to a fancy restaurant, every single day. Lance had had his trouble convincing him but felt so proud when Hunk finally chose a culinary minor apart from his engineering major. He did really enjoyed it and man, that was all Lance wanted.

Keith was a later incorporation. Lance at first didn’t exactly enjoyed his company, because they were rivals and the mullet guy didn’t even remember it, always being so emo and not able to understand basic stuff - “I say Vol- and you say -tron”, what was there to not understand? -. But getting to know him, he wasn’t that of an asshole. He was supportive, in his own weird way, and could be a good laugh when he wanted to. Even his mullet wasn’t that bad after all.

But then the coincidences came, and he couldn’t help to feel like the world was plotting against him. Keith’s brother, Shiro, had been recently rescued from a mission in Iraq after a year being assumed death. He had gone with Keith to the hospital, wanting to support his friend and the state they found Shiro in left his devasted. He was missing an arm and was haunted by nightmares he couldn’t quite control -the doctors had to sedate him, so he didn’t turn violent. He wouldn’t have known what to do, but Keith, Keith showed such strength that made Lance realize he was never giving up on his brother. And so, it made sense that he moved home with him, he would have never dared to stop him. But Hunk, man, Hunk had totally betrayed him!

“Lance, I had this planned before Keith’s moving”

“Ah, vavavva, shut up! You’ve no right of saying anything when you’re leaving me, so you can move with your girlfriend. Betrayal!”

“Dude, you were happy about us when I told you.” Lance made a pout, cause that’s exactly how he had felt. Shay was that rare kind of people that seemed so pure for this world. And by the way they acted whenever she came to their flat, he knew they were so so in love… he secretly wished to one day find something like what they had.

“I know… It’s just, I’d be so lonely” he finally admitted, feeling Hunk’s hand on his shoulder. When he turned, he could feel the big boy’s arms around him, in a way it reminded him of his whole family in those big hugs they did when someone felt down. He was going to miss his friends so much.

While he was helping Hunk moving with the help of Shay, he overhead them talking and when he stepped into the room he saw them smiling way too much in his direction. Shay came to help with the boxes, lifting them like they barely weighted a thing. That girl was strong.

Cute and strong.

Lance always joked about how he loved girls who could pick him bridal style and jokingly flirted with Shay, winking at her while telling her that if she wasn’t going out with his best friend, he would totally be at her feet. That always made the girl giggle. Because even if Lance seemed like a flirty lover boy, she knew that wasn’t true at all. Lance was a gentleman to the core. He simply made those comments to make her laugh, overdoing those finger guns everyone secretly adored.

“Hunk told me you’d kinda feel lonely. I’m sorry I’m taking him from you.”

“What?! No Shay, please, don’t apologise for such thing! You both thought about it months ago and I know how happy it makes Hunk and you” he smiled, but Shay could still see the sadness that smile was trying to hide. “Now I’d have the whole flat for myself, living the single’s life. Girls out there get ready for Lancy-Lance!”

Shay shacked her head, stepping closer to him knowing that what she was about to ask was just right.

“So, you wouldn’t mind sharing the flat with a girl, am I right?”

Shay explained him about her own roommate, Allura. When she talked about moving with Hunk, Allura said she had a place to stay and fully supported her friend. But something had happened with said place and Allura had found herself alone with a flat she couldn’t afford and 4 mice. Lance didn’t quite understand the mice part but kept listening. He kinda was in the same situation as Shay’s friend, and being honest, he’d love some company.

Being alone, well, that wasn’t Lance McClain’s thing.

Also, it was Shay the one asking him. He knew she wouldn’t be friends with anyone, less share a flat with them. And for what Hunk had told him, Allura was a really nice girl. And so, he found himself waiting for her to arrive in her car.

He barely knew anything about her. Just her name and that she owed 4 mice. He smiled to himself, imagining sharing his flat with someone Cinderella-like. Would her clothes turn into rags at midnight too?

He was thinking about it when he heard a knock in the door. Shit, he had been sitting by the window so he could see her arrive, for nothing. He rushed to the door, opening it to find himself facing a pile of boxes. He was going to say something when he felt them gravitate towards him. He extended his arms, trying to catch the body behind them.

He felt something warm against his chest, lowering his gaze to find the most beautiful blue eyes he had ever seen staring at him. They were like galaxies, with confusion shinning inside them. Lance felt his checks burning hot, and his mouth trying to articulate words that never formed in his lips. The stranger beat him to that.

“I’m sorry, looks like I tripped” she smiled, and Lance felt like his heart had stopped. She was so so beautiful “Thank you for catching me.”

“Oh, yes, well, no need to thank!” he finally said, clearing his throat as he gently let her body go, making sure she was steady standing in her feet. “Allura, right?”

“Yes!” she answered with so much enthusiasm Lance felt his knees go weak. “Lance if I’m correct”

“Yup, the one and only. At your service, my lady” he theatrically bowed, giving her a shining smile that faced as soon as he straightened up. “Please come in. Sorry I wasn’t at the door when you arrived, I’d have helped you with the boxes… that are all in the floor. But I didn’t hear anything cracking so they should be fine…”

“Yes, don’t worry, it’s all clothes” she stepped inside, dodging out the boxes as Lance guided her to the centre of what seemed the living room. The floor was wood’s, with the walls painted in blue and white, the same as the furniture, so many plants and big windows with coloured wood that somehow give a Cuban vibe. Well, it made sense as Lance was from there, or so said Shay.

“Your room in this way” Lance said, leading her to an empty space with a small balcony and its own bathroom. “Hunk and I used to sleep here, but as you’re a girl I thought it would give you more privacy, and so I’m staying at Keith’s room now. It’s too blue I suppose. Keith always said this room was like stepping into an ocean, vah, he is too emo to understand the amazingness of blue… oh, but you can paint the walls whatever colour you like, just say the word and we change it!”

Allura blinked, overwhelmed by all the information that left his lips in so little time. When he finally looked her way, expecting some kind of response, Allura was moved by eyes she had not realized were blue before. Blue like an ocean after a storm, so deep it almost felt as if you’d drown in them if you stared too much.

“Oh, but I do like blue” she smiled, making Lance smile as well, giving her a proud look as if only them knew the true value of the colour blue. Allura giggled a little. Shay was right, he was cute indeed.

“Okay! So, let’s bring all your stuff blue-lover-friend!”

And at that, Allura couldn’t help to laugh in a way she had never done in a long time.

“These are Platt, Chulatt, Plachu and Chuchule” she explained with the mice in her hands, showing them to Lance as he left the last box in the floor. “They say it’s an honour to share an apartment with you.”

“So, the mice thing was true” he said, stepping closer to see the mice. He extended a finger to them, mimicking a handshake with their tiny paws. They made a cute noise, which made Lance laugh lightly. “You wouldn’t happen to lose footwear around, do you?”

“No” she raised her eyebrow, mimicking the one Lance had in his own face. “And neither do my carriages turn into pumpkins and my clothes into rags when it’s past midnight.”

Lance couldn’t help to laugh. She had caught his reference! And answered him with such grace! If he had any doubts about her being his roommate, they were all gone. Sharing the apartment with her would be an honour, as the “mice” had said.

N O T E S

banner credit: scientists confirm cuddling with ur gf to be the best feeling in the universe by @cherryandsisters

about it: well it’s a roommate AU -wow, don’t tell me, right?-, in which I picture Lance and Allura sharing an apartment and the different situations they find themselves into with said sharing. “Home is where you are” is like another name for this series.

I’m not sure about the estructure, probably they will chapters following a major plot line but developving independent stories in each of them. Something like revealing little details that will converge into the final chapter? Well, I hope reading the whole thing would be self-explanatory... The lenght of each chapter would vary a lot as well, depends on the inspiration and how the story evolves.

The pov would be changing between Lance’s and Allura’s depending mostly of what character I want to look at the situation with. I mean, that depends on which eyes I want to borrow so is that character the one mixing its feelings with the narrative... something like that.

IMPORTANT THING -> English is not my first language so probably there would be mistakes, like totally, is like a thing you’ve to accept if you keep reading the story. Also when using the Spanish in the fic, it’d probably resemble more the Castillian Spanish than the one used in Cuba -of course I’d try to keep it as accurate as possible- because the first one is my mother tongue and I will rely more on what I speak.

Here are some notes/major plot lines I intend to follow, maybe with some edits to them:

i thought i was safe speaking in my native tongue about you. turns out you took (insert language) as a school elective for 7 years and know pretty much everything i’ve been saying about your beautiful eyes and ass...

you’re hot and i talk about you over the phone with my friends all the time using a code name that we thought was really clever, but it’s actually really obvious and you’ve known all about my Huge Crush on you this whole time and that’s why you’ve been walking around half naked so much

my mom/dad/parent/sibling is in town and is crashing with me, therefore us, and they’re convinced that we’re secretly dating

i have a mad crush on you so i’m going to keep bringing people over to make u jealous but you either don’t give a fuck or are pretending not to notice

bonus notes: I’ve been collecting reference material for the apartment’s appereance aka Pinterest photos and drawings of people’s houses and bedrooms. Because descriptions are easier when you’ve something to describe or at least a concept. As the story keeps going I would make collages and probably even try interior design -I’ll draw the apartment, cause yeah, who cares if I’ve never done it before?!-. I’ll add as well photos for stuff I think could be relevant, such as the clothing or maybe, pufff, the hairstyles?

I’m a visual person and I think having references helps a lot to picture the story on your mind. So I’ll do that, so you can see what I see when I’m writing... or something like that.

Hope you guys enjoy this fic and I’d love to ear your opinions about it. Any questions, ideas, headcannons or suggestions are always welcome!

#allurance #roommate au #home is where you are #my writing #not first time writing a fic but kinda as if it was #it has been so long #this is for the allurance discord who has been supporting this fic even before the first chapter was written #thank you guys #hope you like it and that it is a good contribution to this ship i love so much

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loveraids · 6 years ago

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advice for incoming freshmen

hey guys! here’s a list of some tips i made for incoming freshmen. i thought i’d share some advice/knowledge i’ve accumulated over the years too. everything’s under the cut. if you have any questions/concerns, feel free to message me! ☀️ (tw: long post)

1. one of the biggest fears many people have entering high school is not making friends. however, there are MANY opportunities where you can make friends! besides being friendly with who you sit with in class, try joining a sport, club, extra curricular, etc. i’m not saying making friends is the easiest thing in the world- i still struggle with it today. but don’t put yourself down if you’re not immediately friends with everyone in the school in the first week- it’ll take some time to develop. remember that everyone else is just as scared as you are, and they aren’t gonna come out of their shells until you do as well.

2. depending on your school, they may start throwing college shit at u on day one (although unlikely). no matter what, don’t stress right now!! the college process really doesn’t begin until the weeks leading up to the summer of junior year. you have time!! it’s ok to not know what you want to do. college has an “undecided” major for a reason.

3. V O L U N T E E R. i cannot stress this enough. it has soso many benefits and freshman year will most likely be the most time-free year you have. find a position at your local zoo, library, camp, hospital, etc. it’s a great resume booster and can aid you in the college application process (additionally, if you have an honors society that requires volunteer hours, you’ll need them anyways). also, you get to help people !

4. freshman year is going to teach you what real high school work is. you may struggle, and it’s ok! i was one of the “bright” kids that had their grades drop once i entered high school, and yeah, it did a lot to my self esteem. but throughout the years i picked myself up- i embraced help from my peers/teachers, i figured out what method of studying works best (pro tip: studying for math? look over the basic rules and do thousands of practice problems. science that isn’t math based? quizlet and khan academy. history? quizlet.), i learned that it’s OK to get a grade under a 90/A-. it’s going to seem tough at first, but just remember that you’re adjusting to a completely new environment and work ethic. you will get through it!! please shoot me an ask if you ever need help i’ll always answer. (edit: also do ur homework!!! it could be the difference between a B+ and an A-.)

5. imagine the crustiest person in your grade right now. now imagine them trying to hit on a kid that’s four years younger than you. gross, right? that’s exactly what a senior hitting on a freshman is like!! do not do that shit!!! there is NO reason why a senior should be trying to hook up with you when they’re 17-18 and you’re 14-15. that shit is NASTY. do NOT date seniors (even juniors are sketchy).

6. high school is where you will probably encounter alcohol/drugs/sex/etc at some point. do not be pressured!! if you don’t wanna smoke or drink then don’t do it (if you’re with the type of people who pressure, you better run). ive personally never had an experience where i was pressured, and people were usually respectful, but i can’t speak the same for everyone else. wanna get fucked up and party with your friends? be careful! i’m not promoting underage drinking but lets be honest a lot of kids do it. no sense in trying to pretend like that isn’t the real world. if you’re invited to some party by someone you KNOW has a bad rep, then don’t go!! you’ll have more opportunities.

7. if you’re worried about SATs/college admissions exams, you have a year. kids in my school are kinda crazy and were studying freshman year which made NO sense to me. end of sophomore year/beginning of junior year is usually adequate (plus- the main rule with SATs/ACTs is that you should take the test NO MORE than three times- that’s three chances!! i personally did well on my SAT, so if u have any questions feel free to ask me.

8. back to the point of pressure - if you’re going to a gifted and talented program/school, you will most likely feel academic pressure. with so many bright and smart peers, your standards will end up being much higher than the general population. i’m speaking from experience.

9. student government is usually a popularity contest. if you don’t win, don’t beat yourself up. if you do, congrats!

10. take pictures! save holiday cards! make memories!! i sincerely regret not taking photos (with me in them!!) during my freshman and sophomore years. there are a lot of great memories that i didn’t record because i was too embarrassed to get in front of a camera. i’ve learned that i’d rather cringe at a photo i look bad in in the privacy of my own phone, rather than not have a picture at all.

11. start developing good studying habits right away. what motivated me was getting cute/colorful pens, highlighters, erasers, post-its, etc., and making my notes look really pretty. i have my own personal post-it collection now. if you find ways to make studying even remotely fun/interesting, it will be extremely beneficial in the long run. i remember the summer before my junior year, i was excited to go back literally because i wanted to use my new pens.

12. this is a future piece of advice, but i would say there’s a 99% chance that you will be friends with mostly different people by senior year. you might have a core few, or a bestie, but myself and many others know that there are people who we were best friends with freshman year that don’t say hi to us in the halls senior year.

13. listen, there are gonna be some snake ass bitches. there’s no avoiding it. just don’t pay attention to them!! they get off on thinking they’re better than you. the best way to no longer deal with someone you don’t like is to just not associate with them. i’m obviously over simplifying these situations, but its usually not that deep. if it’s to the point where it’s causing you a great amount of stress, then it may be something you need to talk to a guidance counselor about.

14. please. do. not. run. and scream. in. the. halls. who do u think u are?? it’s 8 AM i don’t want to hear your screeching voice as you run into 7 people!!!!!

15. the freshmen are usually the joke of the school. you’ll hear you guys referred to as gremlins in some way, shape, or form. just deal with it, you’ll understand when you’re no longer freshmen (unless someone’s being unnecessarily mean!!).

16. make friends with your teachers!!!!!!!!! stay after class to have a little conversation with them. email them after school. bring them gifts on major holidays. IT WILL PAY OFF. letters of recommendation? done! need a teacher to sign off on something? done! minorly messed up in class? they’ll let it go bc they like you! this will also probably result in an increase in your character/participation grades.

17. make a travel pack that you keep in your bag - a few small bills, pads/tampons (for those who need), pen, pencil, bobby pins, nail file, hair elastic, gum/mints, small perfume, band-aids, charger, etc.

18. thrift books sells books for really cheap!! also, ALWAYS check other places before ordering from normal bookstores (i’m looking at u barnes & noble)- they’re most likely cheaper.

19. i’m not gonna be one of those people who is like “school is the best!! it can be great for anyone if you just try!!” bc that shit aint true. it might suck ass for some of you. just know that high school isn’t your life. some people act like your life ends after high school. we’re 14-18 years old and still have so much to learn and see. if you set up a countdown to the end of high school your first day of freshman year, so be it.

20. your teachers are people too. they’re not there for you to use and abuse. they have families, problems, LIVES. they also have 3289472 students besides yourself, and assuming they should put you above the rest will only end up in disappointment.

21. social media is not all that matters. esp in this day and age, people will definitely be using snapchat and instagram (and hey! tumblr too). but don’t think you need social media to fit in. one of the most popular girls in my school literally made her instagram just the other day. to reiterate: it’s not that deep!!

22. you’re gonna change a lot (which is ok!!). freshman year i only wore hot topic and watched supernatural & doctor who. now, i just watch cooking vids and fawn over shawn mendes. it’s ok to change!! even just though freshman year you’ll change. i know i got like. super gay

23. if you find yourself having free time (or having study hall), do your homework!!! once you get home you’ll probably get distracted/lazy. what i used to do was go to my local library after school and get all my homework done so that i wouldn’t leave my school mindset and not wanna do anything. even if you don’t get everything done, you’ll thank yourself later.

24. there’s a difference between “forming your own opinion” on someone and completely ignoring their reputation/what your friends say. i can’t tell you how many people have gotten burned by the SAME guy in my school because none of them even kept in mind the warnings they had heard about him. it’s ok to give people a chance, but remember that most people’s reputations hold some truth (but not everyone!).

25. this seems pretty obvious but like. be nice. don’t talk mad shit about people you don’t know. rumors fly FAST in high school. what’s even worse is when they’re not true. fact check your shit if you ARE gonna gossip.

26. ok last point (for now). everything is gonna be new. there’s no getting around it. you WILL feel out of place. you’ll most likely be anxious. but everything will end up ok (cheesy, i know). the first week of high school is one the scariest weeks you’ll have in high school. things need time to settle. you’ll make friends, you’ll find things you like, you’ll be happy!! enter high school with a growth mindset. it may not seem like it, but your attitude WILL impact how things turn out.

overall, you guys will be fine. good luck to all of you !! if you have any questions or need advice on a specific thing, please feel free to send me an ask!! i’m always here. love u bbies

#this is still just as long as my last one but at leats it's cleaner now #feel free to add btw!!#pls rb this lol #high school #tips #freshman #freshmen #hs #advice #incoming freshman #school #studying #studyblr #back to school #Back to school tips

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jugsserpents · 7 years ago

Text

Official|| Sweet Pea

request: Hey, can u do an imagine where y/n is jealous cuz some blonde girl is always on sweet pea at the whyte wyrm when he plays pool w/ the boys. Y/n thinks he is also all about her when she actually annoys the hell out of him & he only has eyes for y/n. (They're not dating, only feelings for eachother) She works at the bar for a mini job & tony catches her staring. After a week one night you break a glass or something cuz ur angry af & ur hand is covered with blood and u just leave the wyrm angrily

word count:1202

warnings: mild swearing

New Serpent inductions were usually annoying, especially when it was a batch of high school freshman. It was bad enough that they had to flood the halls at school but now they clogged the space at the Wyrm too. But this fresh batch was more than annoying, anyone who knew the four of you knew that you and Sweet Pea were a thing. Not officially, but, they had known well enough then to flirt with either one of you in fears of what the other would do. Apparently, Sarah didn’t get the damn message.

You stood beside Toni, dishrag in hand drying the drinking glasses. Eyes squinted, glaring at the two of them. “You know if you glared any harder you’d probably be able to shoot lasers at them” Toni snickered at you and your jealousness. “I just don’t know who this bitch thinks she is” you replied slamming a glass down on the counter and grabbing another one to dry. “She’s just a freshman, and to be fair you guys are barely even a thing” Toni pointed out sending you a look as if to say “hooking up on school nights and banging in the janitors closet doesn’t count as dating” You just ignored her and continued your glaring. She sat on the end of the pool table laughing too loudly at everything the boy had said causing your nose to scrunch up in disgust. Her blonde hair being twirled around her fingers as she listened to your boy laugh and joke with Fangs. You had to admit, her bright blonde locks made you feel like your hair was dull. She had the perfect teeth and body. You were just you, and that wasn’t a bad thing. You loved yourself usually. But seeing Sweet Pea being interested in her just made you feel bummed. You sighed mixing a drink for one of the older guys there, picking up your tips and dishrag off the counter you went back to drying the dishes. You and Toni stood side by side making jokes to pass the time as you organized the bar. FP came around and leaned on the bar, “I see Sweet Pea finally has a new piece of ass” he said with a chuckle to a few of the older men as Toni mixed his drink. “Yeah she’s a fresh one, they’ll have lots of fun” the other man winked as they laughed. You hadn’t realized that you had tensed up until you heard Toni gasp “Shit (Y/N)” “What?” You replied following her eyes to your hand, shards of glass from the cup you had been holding now deep into your skin. You let out a hiss at the sight of it as the blood started to bubble up around the cuts. If there was anything that made your skin crawl it was the sight of your own blood. Being a serpent meant you had made other people bleed but you’d always make sure you were never the one with the cuts. FP stood pushing his drink aside as he saw the color drain from your face, “fuck that’s gonna need stitches” he paused looking around “Fogarty and Pea” he yelled above the commotion of the bar “get the truck, (Y/N) needs to go to the hospital!” he grabbed the dish rag and carefully applied pressure around the chunks of glass protruding from your skin. You heard the clank of pool sticks dropping as Fangs rushed out the door and Sweet Pea made his way over to you, the blonde trailing quickly behind him. “Jesus Christ (Y/N)” he took your hand from FP keeping the pressure steady, leading you out towards the truck, brushing past the blonde like she wasn’t there. If you weren’t in a great deal of pain you probably would’ve laughed at her facial expression.

The truck ride to the hospital was fast, Sweet Pea trying to make you laugh and distract you from looking at the blood pouring from your hand. He knew from experience that if you saw the blood you’d be out cold in seconds. They pushed their way through the doors and towards the front desk, giving your information to the nurse and helping you into the wheelchair as they grabbed the doctor. “Do one of you want to come back with her?” The doctor could barely finish his sentence before Sweet Pea had stood, gladly volunteering to hold your hand as they pulled the glass from your hand.

You had walked back into the waiting area with Pea laughing, hand stitched and well bandaged. You had met with Fangs, who offered to drive you to your house which resulted in Pea offering to stay with you. You know, just in case any of your kitchen cups got crazy and decided to kick your ass again. You two sat on the couch, your legs in his lap as he rubbed your feet like he always did after your Wyrm shifts. “So what happened back there?” He asked looking over from the tv to you. “Nothing,” you said your thumbs finding each other and fiddling together nervously. “Oh, so you're telling me that cup broke by itself?” “It’s stupid!” “Nothing that upsets you is stupid” he argued with you “I just got jealous” you sighed covering your face with your hands as he smirked at you. “See” you pointed at his dumb face, “I told you! Stupid” “It’s not stupid, it’s kinda hot that you get angry when you’re jealous” he laughed “why were you jealous though? I was just playing pool” he raised an eyebrow “Yeah with Sarah” You scoffed “I don’t even get why it made me so mad, it’s not like banging on the weekend makes us a couple” you tried to hide the hurt that was laced in your words. Sweet Pea knew that you had feelings for him. He was your first, trusting him because he was your only guy friend. After the two of you had sex things between you changed, he stopped flirting and hanging with other girls. Spending most of his free time with you, going on “dates” together, and doing couple things he had just never asked you to be his girlfriend. You’d be lying if you said it didn’t bother you, it kept you up crying far too many nights. But you never wanted to push it, fearing that it would send him away from you. He laughed “the annoying freshman girl?” his laughter faded when he saw you were serious “(Y/N)..” He started “you know I only want you” his hand reached for yours but you pulled away. “Then why aren’t we official? Why are we only bang buddies?” “You think we aren’t official?” his grew quiet “what other girl have I slept with has her own shampoo in my trailer? A drawer of her own clothes? The spare key to my bike?” You looked down at your hands in your lap, you’d never really thought of it like that, “I didn’t know I had to say it for it to be official (Y/N) I just thought you knew” he said with a sigh

#Sweet pea imagine #sweet pea x reader #riverdale imagine

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ofcacthuxandkylosaur · 6 years ago

Note

Are there any trans Kylo fics out there? I feel as if it's all only trans hux this or feminized hux that...

I think there is indeed more trans Hux than trans Kylo out there, but I still managed to find some. Beware that I haven’t read most of the fics and therefore cannot say anything about their content. I also recommend of course you read the autor’s warnings;)

Trans Kylo Art

https://croatomunchi.tumblr.com/post/142969291522/would-u-ever-draw-like-hux-and-trans-kylo - croatomunchi

http://artllama.tumblr.com/post/146236116396/i-did-a-transition-log-because-i-cant-not-spend - artllama

http://toiek.tumblr.com/post/141289851114/i-love-trans-kylo - toiek

http://rip-space-birdie.tumblr.com/post/141067487245/kylo-ren-is-trans-pass-it-on - rip-space-birdie

http://opens-up-4-nobody.tumblr.com/post/153044170134/stutter-iplier - opens-up-4-nobody

http://opens-up-4-nobody.tumblr.com/post/147354462721/nice - opens-up-4-nobody

http://angerydj.tumblr.com/post/169121106275 - angerydj

http://corvosfursona.tumblr.com/post/137737245113/they-fixed-him-up-but-hes-conked-and-phasma - corvosfursona

http://kiiiloren.tumblr.com/post/137138625403/coming-to-u-live-tiny-trans-padawan-ben-solo - kiiiloren

+ There is also a blog whose name is Trans!Kylo

Trans Kylo headcanons/ideas

http://bygoneboy.tumblr.com/post/148311042452/hi-u-should-talk-abt-ur-trans-kylo-headcanons - bygoneboy

http://nbnightwing.tumblr.com/post/136272896831/anyway-ive-been-thinking-a-lot-about-trans-guy - nbnightwing

http://kremaclassii.tumblr.com/post/137459014170/whispers-more-trans-kylo-head-canons - kremaclassii

http://kiiiloren.tumblr.com/post/138435517778/ive-been-thinking-about-trans-hux-and-kylo + http://kiiiloren.tumblr.com/post/137141605853/since-leia-is-force-sensitive-imagine-her-being - kiiiloren

http://lilstarkiller.tumblr.com/post/141230802426/alright-alright-i-keep-thinking-weve-got-trans - lilstarkiller

http://generallyhorribleatlife.tumblr.com/tagged/trans%21kylo - generallyhorribleatlife

Trans Kylo Fics

“Almond” - angry_android || Kylo likes to hang out at his local Starbucks and brood. Hux works there part-time while going to community college. Because of someone else’s sloppy handwriting, Hux accidentally calls out Kylo’s name as “Kylie,” and there is fallout. The fallout might include dating.

“pocketknife” - angry_android || There’s a reason Kylo wears a crop top. Hux understands.

“Casanova, Fuck Me Over” - Anonymous || With another kiss, Hux glances up. “You promise try and keep your limbs to yourself?” Ren snorts. “I will try my best,” he says, placing his hands on the sheets, “If you promise to stick your face between my thighs sometime soon.”

“Tarine Tea and Lambro Shark” - armitageren || The First Order celebrates a recent victory on a luxurious planet and it’s the perfect setting for Kylo Ren and Armitage Hux’s first date. Hux struggles to survive the date with his anxiety putting him on edge because Ren doesn’t know he’s trans and he isn’t sure what that means for their future.

“all the noises (from your hateful little mouth)” - bloomthefox || In which Kylo whines and puts off his feelings, Phasma calls it like she sees it, and Hux is a stone cold mystery. Or, the defense attorney AU that literally nobody asked for.

“care and control” - cracktheglasses (cormallen) || It’s a wide strip of dark brown leather, soft, already a bit worn at the edges, snapped shut over Ben’s wrist. It means Ben wants him. Ben needs him. He may not always be able to say it, but he means it every time he puts the cuff on, every time he puts himself into Hux’s care – I’m yours.

“juxtaposition” - cracktheglasses (cormallen) || He hopes Hux makes it hurt. Hopes Hux is as mean and arrogant and smart here as he is everywhere else, the way Kylo tries to be.

“Changed” - Davechicken || Kylo was sure from a young age that he wasn’t female. It’s not until he leaves home that he finds people who agree.

“Pushed” - Davechicken || Hux has to push his boy a little, to get him through the discomfort. Kylo always appreciates it after.

“Control” - DoctorNinjaSpy || Patience is Armitage’s most valued virtue. Sometimes, however, he falters.

“special delivery” - gonnapop || Hux had not intended to be present for this messy process. Rather, he’d imagined returning after his shift and being handed a clean, swaddled baby. But there was nothing for it now.He rolled up his sleeves.

“Heel, Beg, Speak” - JulieCox || Emperor Hux has a new pet, and enjoys pushing him around. Kylo has secrets, and enjoys keeping them to his own damn self. But they won’t stay secrets for long.

“the Panty fic” - kyloskummies || Kylo and Hux are roommates. Kylo is trans and wears panties. It’s a hot day and the AC is broken. Y'all know where it goes from there.

“Bad Poet and Good Artist” - lovewashisname || Hux has moved schools before. He’s sure this time won’t be any different. He’ll keep to himself, make a few acquaintances, and put up with his father the best he can. But not even an hour into his first day and he’s shattered his phone, walked into a gorgeous boy, and had a very, very awkward conversation with said gorgeous boy. In other words, Hux meets the incredibly sad Ben Solo, and maybe he doesn’t want to leave this school so soon.

“Bad Poetry on Starlit Rooftops” - lovewashisname || Everywhere Kylo looks, high school is portrayed as either the best place you’ll ever be, or a shithole that will ruin four years of your life. For Kylo, it’s neither. High school has been a place to hide from his own body, and to get into fights every once in a while. So in one year, none of that will change, he thinks. How wrong could he be? told from Kylo’s point of view

“A Real Boy” - MosImagination || Ben solo is a transmale junior, he has a crush on a senior named Hux. Ben is too afraid to show off his real self, but Hux quickly accepts him. And loves him.

“Birth of a dream” - MosImagination || Ben solo is a transmale, hux has always wanted a child, Ben gives his body to have their child.

“Expectations” - MosImagination || Ben solo didn’t know what to expect coming home on Valentines Day.

“Shark in the Water” - SeraphicVictory || Kylo Ren was absolutely the best sailor there ever was. Or that’s what he liked people to believe anyway. In truth, he was no better than any other man at the mercy of the sea. With one fatal mistake, he and his ship were destroyed in a terrible storm, and Kylo was certain he would fall to the watery grave that most sailors met at the end. But then he wakes up to a handsome, red-headed man. His savior: The Mershark called ‘Hux’.

“Someone to come home to” - ShinigamiKnox || Hux is the supportive boyfriend and helps Kylo deal with his dysphoria. It was supposed to be a more serious piece of work, but I could not stop laughing at the infamous Ren quote. I’m so sorry.

“A morning at the gym” - SidMjkGc || Just another kind of workout.

“This Asshole” - twinkyatta || Hux goes to a coffee shop every day, but there’s a new barista, and holy fuck does he hate him.

+ Trans Female Kylo fic

“Fate” - MosImagination || It was fate that they met. A beautiful transfemale Kylo ren. A handsome transmale Hux.

Trans Kylo series (of fics)

“The Monsters We Keep” - AriMarris || Description: “The Monsters We Keep” is the story of Hux and Kylo, who fall in love and marry young and make many mistakes. Basically, the films rewritten through Kylo’s eyes with drastic changes. With extra one-shots thrown in the mix for fun.

“Bastards and Broken Things” - Bipolar_Armitage_Hux, kohoutek || No Description –> Resume of first work: A story of Armitage Hux’s childhood from the Bastards and Broken Things AU / Series.

“Caged by Monsters” (one work for now) - Bipolar_Armitage_Hux, kohoutek || No Description –> Resume of first work: An introduction to the psychiatric ward AU - this is written by an actually neurodivergent person and thus there is a strong attempt to make it not remotely ableist. The “bad guys” in this are the abusive doctors and an ableist system. Hux meets Kylo Ren for the first time, or rather the other sees him in a therapy session with Dr. Brendol Hux and becomes fascinated by him.

“The Tired Raptor” - Kylux_TRASH || Description: “Hollywood, 1939. Amidst the glitz and the glitter of a bustling young movie talent at the height of its golden age, the Hollywood Tower Hotel was a star in its own right. A beacon for the show business elite. Now, something is about to happen that will change all that”Something did happen to change that. It happened, on October 31st, 1939, Hollywood California. Kayla-Rose and her male escort, Mr. Hux were riding in the elevator when they entered into a world unknown. They entered The Twilight Zone.

“when the lights are low” - transkylo (captainandor) || No Description –> Resume of first work: “Do your colleagues know how fucking possessive you are?” Kylo asks, canting his hips back, pressing into Hux’s touch as far as he can.Hux grins. “Does your mother know that you sleep with her political rivals?” Kylo’s laugh is breathy and uneven. “I don’t make a habit of it.”

+ Trans Female Kylo series (of fic)

“She’s Just a Girl and She’s on Fire” - Kylo Hux (Loki_Likey_Thor_Odinson) || No Description –> Resume of first work: Hux and Phasma have been sent to a fundraiser for The First Order. Their uniforms have been changed for a smart military uniform and a glamorous ball gown. Everyone that should be here is – except for one person.Kylo Ren is absent, still on another planet, having surgery. She was supposed to be here, supposed to be on security detail for the night; Hux lost hope of seeing his girlfriend for the first time in months when he saw two Knights of Ren circling the room.

“from bby Finn to teenage heartthrob + Hux (one work for now) - orphan_account || No Description –> Resume of first work: Mostly, Phasma loves her job. But sometimes, just sometimes, she really hates it. Meanwhile, Hux has a slight problem, and her name is Kylo Ren.

#here you go #hope it helps #this is of course a non exaustive list #tbh i usually do not do fic rec/lists but i had time and i didn't have it in my aus too...#if you spot any mistake don't hesitate to tell me:)#kyux #au #trans kylo au

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