#lame ass crossover

[theterrornaut]

SOME JUDGES (Drew my Darktide operatives in the Justice Department)

[un-pearable]

i am fine admitting i have a shameful love of shitty crossover fic in which characters get to show up in media i like slightly less and then one-up all the characters there by being competent badasses in ways you don’t usually get to see bc in their normal universe you���re usually watching from said characters pov. but i absolutely loathe reincarnation fic with the same premise. no i do not want to read about midoriya izuku with sonic the hedgehog’s memories just give me sonic the hedgehog

[lupisstheturd]

i love drawing absolute bullshit

[cassioppenny]

i think the problem with pokemas to me is that there isn't actually that many interactions between cross generation characters. like it's a huge crossover game but red and silver haven't interacted ONCE???? you barely see characters becoming friends with characters outside of their game not counting the ocs. they haven't even the obvious interactions like irida meet bw era ingo. like. that's such an easy cool interaction and im fucking sick and tired of pla submas shit.

why bother with a crossover if the characters just usualy stick around with the other characters from their game

[h34vybottom]

ジルファ / Zephyr

[samsassinparvismagna]

I couldn't agree more with this reply ^

I was literally thinking about this earlier i.e ACOTAR plotholes and copy+pasted dialogue e.g. TOGs "I will not be afraid" used in CC1 and I gave myself a headache 😂

If I hated sjm I wouldn't have so much art related to her books on my wall, but there are parts that really need addressing and others that were done so bloody poorly it makes you wonder how what why where was her brain at when writing *glares at silver flames*

do you actually like SJM’s books? i never hear you say anything positive about her books or characters or writing, but you have an acotar blog and write acotar fanfic so i’m a little confused?

I like the groundwork but not the execution. I think she has great ideas and on the first read, I’m always hooked. The deeper I get, the more plot holes and retcons I find which puts me off. There’s a lot of repetition in her writing.

Three things I do like:

Nesta

Hunt

Elorcan

I started this blog before ACOSF was out because I loved nesta (and back then Nessian) then I read ACOSF and was just so angry about the book. I love to write, I always have. I like a lot of the characters and I treat the books like my sandbox to play in :)

[onepieceoftheoceanblues]

More One Piece X Batman au ideas/hcs

Just more assorted ideas from this OP Batfam au here iv been playing with. All you have to know is the Batfam is now in the op world tho!

-Im leaving the og post with multiple options but im def leaning twords them having their own Pirate crew, and either ally with another canon crew or have ties to the Revs, or both. Im unsure on what they'd be called because the Bat Pirates or Bat and Bird Pirates is kinda lame lol so ill figure something out later, and also am open to suggestions!

I feel like they're very open about being Vigilante-Pirates, working like or with the Revs but still being Pirates. It catches on pretty quick for them, and later is a classification used for other similar crews. Also, yes they follow the Pirate Codes and learn the traditions! They mostly learned out of curiosity at first but learned how important it was and kinda just fell into them.

Here's the set-up on the crew for those with official position, though they do have a lot of crossovers (Any positions not specifically mentioned are just done by all the crew or when needed, or not needed at all);

Bruce is the Captain, and Navigator (Tho I feel like all of them learn how to navigate just in case). The crew mostly governs itself, but they learn more about the Pirate Codes and make sure to listen to their Captain when it's important because it's as much as about respect to their crew but also for other crews. They adapt pretty well to it tbh tho it takes a bit because being a pirate crew is largely very different from a Vigilante group.

Dick is the First Mate, and their Communications Expert/Diplomat. Ie he keeps track of allies, friends, man's the phones, er, snails? And is the one usually to socialize or mediate with both interpersonal and outside the crew. He does use swords, but doesn't consider himself the official Swordsman of the crew, that's Damian. (This is because I found out in older comics Bruce taught him to fight swashbuckler style, so he uses swords he switches out with his Escrima Sticks when needed)

Jason is their Gunner/Sniper and Cook, and he also is their Chronicler. He bitches a lot about the last two, but he refuses to let anyone take over the Cook role as he doesn't trust anyone else, but also enjoys writing their adventures down despite denying it.

Tim is their Information Gatherer and Chemist Expert, and knows the second most of Navigating. He and Bruce also are the ones who mostly make the weapons for the others, though most of them could if needed. He also shares Archaeologist duties with Bruce, though everyone partakes.

Cass is their Spymaster and Scout, and also "secret weapon" ie she kicks major ass and scares the shit out of their enemies cuz nobody expects the tiny half mute girl to be one of their frontline fighters <3

Stephanie is their Doctor, because I love the hc that she decides to become a Doctor and has been going to med school (and because I need someone to fill the position without Alfred here ^-^'), as well as their Tailor, though she splits that with Jason and Dick as needed. Though everyone knows Advanced First Aid due to their lifestyles.

I feel like Duke decides to pick up the position of Official Shipwright because they need someone to do so, and actually comes to really enjoy learning how to make and take care of ships properly.

Damian is their other Swordsman, due to his skill and pride in his swordsmanship. He is also their Beast Tamer, and secondary Spy. He's often thought to be a Cabin Boy, which pisses him off, but he's got actual positions on the ship, so he isn't despite his age. Some of the Old Guard have issues with how young he is, but it's not like anyone of them had a choice due to his past, and it's not like he hasn't earned the roles either. He's more experienced them most pirate crews!

They all switch out chores mostly evenly, Helm the ship, rigging, and do lookout duty, though often trade off when someone needs a break from the others due to the whole "trapped on a ship 24/7 hours together". Most of them know how to use instruments, so technically they all are the Musician, though they don't often do so. Damian plays his Violin the most, however, and has secretly enjoyed learning Sea Shanties to play. Dick is the one who bursts into song and knows almost endless sea shanties.

They're also all considered frontline fighters, which is strange for even a small pirate crew, but anyone can also easily switch to support or really any types of roles in a fight, which makes them even more odd. It's not often crews are very versatile, specially with how most of them can easily pick up the role or position of the roles another inhabits.

-At first I was unsure if they should ditch the costume or nah, but then I realized how hard it would to be to live in them like, 24/7 cuz they can't exactly treat this like patrol. Plus, wear and tear of the costumes would make it just unlikely they'd survive for the months or even years they're stuck in the OP world

So I decided that they do a mix-up. They keep a lot of their costume or costume elements but add more casual and piratey vibes in, both for comfort and style to fit in a little better, like these images.

Bruce really didn't want to, same with ever taking off the masks or suits due to the risk of somehow being ID'd back in their world, but over time even Bruce has to admit they can't live in their suits or all call them only by their Vigilante names forever.

They still all wear masks for the most part, and how much they keep or get rid of varies between them, but yee.

Dick has a coat like above, but he also has a very nice black swashbucklers shirt he'll put over instead. Bruce was bullied into making his cowl only the top part of his face, but they got him a captains/swashbucklers hat that has similar bat ears on it as well to wear. They tried to find a Captain's coat that worked but in the end decided to stick with the cape.

Tim no longer has the full cowl of Red Robin but instead a half face one that also lets his hair free, and kept his "wing cape" and chest belts but overall went for something more casual but still armored.

Damian has changed the least with his Robin suit and refuses to really mess with it, though he will occasionally take the over-shirt off and wear a looser, more comfy shirt over the under-suit.

Uhhh the others I really don't have anything concrete but you get the idea for outfits lol

-The Whitbeards would really like them as pirates, they have soft spots for Crews that are Family, though they are not a fan of how young Damian is, even more so when they learn that apparently all the kids have been fighting since they were little, but eventually find out that Bruce liked it even less than they do, and he really had no other choice other than to teach them to do it safely then let them do it behind his back.

-Mihawk and Bruce would get along very well also btw

[seikotakai]

ok so normally i do not do this type of stuff but uhhhhhh...poll of choose one out of five characters (from anime/fighting games) (got inspired by some poll in which of course i choose daddy kazuya-kun!~(◕‿◕))

behold!:

>a martial artist who is known for pretty much being everywhere you go (fortnite, smash bros, marvel vs capcom, snk vs capcom, namco x capcom, sonic and megaman worlds unite comic, hell even power rangers gets a crossover with street fighter). he likes grapes, so maybe get him some grape ice cream or grape juice if you want to give him something.

>an autistic muscular beefy shy stoic bisexual japanese demon/human hybrid man who has survivor's guilt and trust issues. he loves nature (ex. fishing, gardening, and bird watching), forest bathing, and walking in the forest. he tends to be distant towards others (because of devil gene and fear of people getting killed in the crossfires between him and his dysfunctional family) but he cares about them.

>a delinquent cocky high school drop out who may have never graduated high school, but will definitely still be able to make a living for himself by winning martial arts tournaments and defeating abominations threatening society. he loves poetry, riding motorcycles, and broiled fish.

>a gay homosexual goat villain who should've been the final boss of his franchise, but no it just had to be that lame black goo and that stupid lame rabbit lady. anyways - he shits on everyone (he washed the whole allied shinobi army, he washed the five kages, he finally beat his childhood friend/rival/boyfriend hashirama senju, he almost killed the mc jesus-kun- i mean naruto uzumaki and also gave his best friend sasuke the aerith gainsborough treatment.), he has the best drip in the whole anime/manga, and the biggest #1 hashirama senju dick rider (ex. him glazing hashirama during the five kage fight, and him putting hashirama's face on his damn tit).

>a 200 IQ brunette soul reaper man who also washed the shit out of everyone (stopped mr. poster boy's bankai with a finger, shits on the whole gotei 13, shits on the Visored). just a handsome lonely dude with a god complex who wants to make the world a better place by questionable methods. ironically saved soul society's ass by literally doing nothing but chilling while sitting on the legendary chair-sama (just like how luigi wins by doing absolutely nothing). he turned into a pretty butterfly at one point while fighting mr. poster boy ichigo. he likes tofu, drinking tea, calligraphy, reading books, performing hollowfication experiments, and he hates boiled eggs.

[itchyeye]

IMG ID: A large red glitter text graphic which reads "THE MAGNUS PROTOCOL SPOILERS"

ok episode thoughts

> the intro/set up of the statement was weak and rushed, as they all have been. i dislike the "reading an email" format because it makes the intros hard to follow, and i don't think presenting "case file" information this way serves to flesh out statement givers, even if its information about them. like, tma statement givers telling us about themsleves did so in a way that showed us their lives and circumstances. we heard their tone, we got their word choice and their emotions. reading a list of information at the beginning of an email or forum message just doesn't... convey the same thing.

> the actually spoopy part of the statament was fun!! "hungry architecture" is a lame ass pitch for someone who got sucked into a stranger/flesh/vast crossover episode but.... fine. the flesh eating non-people were great fun. felt very tma-esque in concept if not execution

> i absolutely cannot stomach this........... "plot". celia asking sam for help researching "time travel and parallel dimensions" after all this is like... you really must think very little of your audience!! you truly must think your audience members are very. very. very. stupid. just a bunch of empty eyed brainles automotons who need story beats fed to them as slowly as possible in big block letters.

> bringing in gertrude as gerry's grandma is CRAZY.... like this is alice's "we're a big happy family" line from ep1 slowed reverbed bass boosted etc. it's pathetic. anyway "gigi" is what gerry calls gertrude when he jerks off clutching her cardigan against his chest thinking about how she shoved him in front of the bleeding, animated mannequin that tried to eat her last week.

> since celia is doing a favor "for georgie's podcast" that 100% means melanie is gonna pop up in episode 9 at which point i will stop listening for real

[colorlesschristmastree]

I hope I’m not being annoying but I just really need to rant about my hope that SJM puts feyre in a more prominent role in the next ACOTAR book. I thought her page time was a bit disappointing but not terrible in ACOSF (I mean, ideally I want her on every page. But seeing as that book was all Nesta Nesta Nesta and hardly any Cassian even…and with how bad a book it was, I’m fine with her staying away from whatever that was). But I was heartbroken over the fact she wasn’t in HOFAS at all!? After SJM teased her being there!? I mean, I get it wasn’t a big crossover and Nesta and Azriel were the highlights. But I can’t help but feel embarrassingly bitter that Nesta was highlighted so much in ACOWAR to the point it took away a bit from Feyre’s finale; Nesta was also the topic of conversation in ACOFAS and was at least a quarter of what Feyre-and other characters-were thinking about the whole book. Then the whole of ACOSF she had a terrible arc and her head is a nasty place to be, she was horrible to feyre the whole book and had that cheap ass lame ass “savior” moment at the end… I thought we could finally be free of her and see Elain shine, and get more Feyre. But then SJM put Nesta at the center of the crossover too?? And ended it by seemingly giving Nesta even more plot for her to do next ACOTAR book??? Ugh! I’m just so mad and I feel embarrassed complaining about my favs getting less page time and someone I hate getting too much spotlight but I’m just so mad. I really sincerely hope that while they were doing the crossover in HOFAS, Feyre, Elain, and maybe even Mor were doing other things that we will see in ACOTAR. And I hope feyre gets the respect she deserves. :/

You're not being annoying at all anon! Sorry for responding to this so late. I completely understand your frustrations. It was definitely annoying when I read bits of hofas and saw that despite SJM teasing a lot more acotar character content and acting like there would be more than there is there really wasn't much at all and everything we got was boring as shit. I feel like the way she presented this book and what we got were two very different things.

I definitely agree that the amount Nesta's character is being shoved down peoples throats is getting obnoxious at this point. She got her spin off book and her little story and I really don't think she needs more. Tbh though I wouldn't be too stressed about it since SJM in recent books can't follow through on a plot to save her own life. So many things brought up in CC1 and CC2 that either went absolutely nowhere or just were lightly touched on but didn't have the important it seemed like they would. So I honestly doubt the end of hofas is going to become as massive as we think it is, more likely than not the resolution to that is going to come from a pages long info dumping session where we find out the why but it doesn't actually get it's own plot and story... I mean that's basically how 90% of the mysteries established in the prior two CC books and a bit in ACOSF were handled in HOFAS. I honestly predict the same for the next acotar book lmao.

I also super desperately miss Feyre.. she's the main character and the heart of the acotar series and honestly such a comfort! I wouldn't worry too much though babe, I mean the crossover was basically worthless and just info dumping, I'm glad Feyre wasn't involved in that mess. I still think Elain's book is going to be next and I'm excited for that, Nesta will have a role and that's whatever ig but I'm not going to let a boring character whose book was bad ruin my enjoyment of Elain's book.

The main acotar series where Feyre was still our narrator and protagonist will always be the best in my eyes and these are just spin off books that let us see her sisters stories and they aren't gonna dampen my love for the main series. I'm actually doing a reread of the main series right now with the discord server and we're just raving about how much we adore Feyre and her pov. I love how plot filled these books are, every scene and page actually feels important and contributes to the overarching plot of the book and there are no massive scenes of unnecessary info dumping like certain.. other books.

Love u nonnie and every SJM book that strays from Feyre's holy light is progressively worse written which just says something about our girls story.

[minijenn]

Jen Tortures Herself With Every Dreamworks Animated Movie Ever: Ruby Gillman: Teenage Kraken

So uuuuuhhhhh yeah. I don't know what I was expecting with this movie. Wasn't expecting it to be good, and it wasn't. Nobody is fucking surprised.

Ruby Gillman is, well, a teenage kraken, who lives with her family on land and tries to blend in as a human while being Omg Quirky Relatable Shy Nerd (seriously this movie doesn't have an original bone in its body, we'll get into that more in a bit). She eventually discovers she can turn into a giant kraken and that she comes from kraken royalty. Throw in the breakdown of trust between her and her mother, a new "friendship" she strikes up with a mermaid named Chelsea, and OMG THE PROM IS TOMORROW and you have a whole mess of cliches that didn't come to an end nearly quick enough for me.

So yeah this plot is... extremely derrivitive, on two very specific Pixar movies in particular. It's like... a weird crossover between Luca (fish people trying to blend in on land) and Turning Red (puberty metaphor, mommy issues, etc) and it does none of what those movies did well anywhere near as close to good as they did. Like this movie tries so hard to be surprising and have twists and turns and like... literally none of those surprises landed. None of the emotions landed. None of the jokes landed. Nothing in this boring ass movie landed.

The characters are all pretty one-note. Ruby is your traditional nerdy, awkward girl with a crush on a guy who is also just as bland as stale bread. Her family is pretty uninteresting, her mom is... somewhat better, I guess, and I did like her grandma, but she was about the only character I found some level of enjoyment out of. We also have Chelsea, who big surprise, is our twist villain, as if I didn't see that coming from the second I saw her show up on screen. The way she so easily manipulates and plays Ruby is just... god it makes you wannt scream "DON'T TRUST HER YOU DIPSHIT" the entire time, like girl, I get you're an anxious 15 year old but you should know better jfc.

This movie tries to have lore and be epic, but like... idk it just isn't. The climactic fight scene at the end was so slow-paced and dull, there wasn't really anything about it at all, which for what's essentially a giant kaiju fight, is a damn shame. The jokes were honestly non-existant, and the script itself is already hella dated with so much social media references and modern teen lingo (bestie, bae, etc) despite only coming out last year.

It also doesn't help that, at least in my opinion, this movie is ugly. Like the animation itself is fine, but these goddamn character designs, christ I think they are some of the WORST to ever come out of a Dreamworks movie. The humans all have weird proportions that don't make sense, the krakens don't look like krakens at all and instead look like... humans with long tentacles, which is weird, and the set design... was admittedly ok to look at, but that's about it. Pair that with an utterly forgettable, but servicable score and plenty of equally forgettable pop songs and there's just not much going on here.

I think, at the end of the day, Ruby Gillman is just... lame. Like the concept itself... isn't awful, but the execution, man, they just floundered (get it, fish) on all fronts here. No wonder this thing tanked at the box office. I wouldn't have gone to see it either.

Overall Rating: 4/10

Verdict: Harpoon these lame-ass krakens

Previous Review (Puss in Boots: The Last Wish)

Next Review (Trolls Band Together)

[goddamnwebcomics]

Worst scene from Every Webcomic I've Riffed

Here it finally is. It's a sequel to a now outdated article thingy I did like 10 months ago. The only exceptions for this round are Peter and Company for being too new and Chugworth Academy due to the whole comic being the worst scene. Here we go

Alien Dice: Trasik is a Mimic

This may legitimately be the shittiest plot twist in the entire history of this blog. Honestly Tiffany came up with this whole plot twist because she felt that Chel killing Trasik would have been bad. And like, did Tiffany even realize that until that point, she wrote Trasik as an extremely irredeemable monster? Like the fans were BEGGING for Chel to finally kill Trasik. Considering we don't even know where the real Trasik is, and apparently she was kidnapped, this whole twist was such an afterthought. There wasn't even a single speck of foreshadowing. How did Brown SIrius not know? Why did Riley know it but not tell about it to ANYONE? It was just a last minute attempt to make Chel not a murderer. Come on, Tiffany, like, come on.

Bloody Mary: Shootout

Until this moment, Bloody Mary was just a lame crossover comic. Then Mary, a 13 year old girl, decides to start killing people after she witnesses two burglars about to rob a store. I get that the name of the comic is "Bloody Mary" but it didn't need to get so literal. Literally she could have saved her sister if she went back to the Test Family, but no, she somehow has to walk all the way to Mexico to save her herself, and commit several crimes on her way there. After this she continues to commit atrocities against humanity. How did she even know how to handle a gun? And what is that perspective?

Carnivores: Lothan's Gruesome End

From children killing people to children being killed. I've made it clear Lothan Arc is my least favourite Carnivores arc because the whole thing is torture porn of this poor beaked child. After being tricked to feed shark what is implied to be shit, the shark eats Lothan and shares it with the crocodile, thrashing Lothan's body so hard the whole pool turns red from blood. This then kills all the wolves who tortured Lothan earlier aside from one. It's not as out there as some of the later overkill endings Austin would do, but I feel it's the most disgusting one.

Console Girl: The Simulation Revealed

Before Alien Dice's worst moment, this was the worst plot twist in this blog's history. After the first few chapters full of ecchi hijinks, this comic pulled a SHOCK DARKNESS CEREBUS SYNDROME TWIST and revealed the whole comic until then had been simulation, and humans were under attack by the army of consoles. While the shittiness would only escalate from there with little girls and their giant boyfriends, as well as consoles going from obscure references to author's fetishes, this twist was the start of it all, and the biggest example of how to not do a comedy-to-serious transistion. It received no foreshadowing outside of numbers in names, and I am sure Neda pulled this out of his ass as soon as he realized he wanted to cash in on the whole Doki Doki Literature Club/Don't Hug Me I'm Scared-type "innocent thing turns DARK OOOOH" craze. Not to mention this comic fucking failed at being serious, there were still moments of shitty comedy in between, and the seriousness completely failed because of the ridiculous premise. "FUCKING CONSOLES, I'LL MAKE YOU PAY" remember?

Daisy Falls Apart: The Ending

The ending of this comic was so rushed, I couldn't believe it at first. After getting her kingdom back from Wart, the epilogue only lasted two pages, and Daisy didn't learn anything from her struggles, and it's likely Sarasaland is now fucked because Daisy is a tyrant and a womanchild. Maybe she will end up back at the beginning of the comic soon.

Dominic Deegan: Orc Rape

I was actually thinking if I wanted to rank the scene I disliked the most, or the scene I felt destroyed the comic's reputation. I decided that Orc Rape should be this comic's worst scene because it's so fucking stupid. Apparently it's an orc ritual that neither side wanted to take part in, but Stoneraper, our alleged hero, HAD TO DO IT because otherwise Melna would have DIED. Considering how Mookie would eventually turn orcs into the superminority to end all superminorities, this was such a horrible idea. Even worse than that, Melna did eventually fall in love with her rapist. If you want me to be mad at Siggy for hating the entire orc race, then forget about it.

Gene Catlow: Forzoi's Torment

Gene Catlow has the largest amount of terrible moments in combination of it being the longest comic I've riffed thus far and also being full of moments of corrupt morality from Albert's weird mind. Probably the worst moment of them all has to be Forzoi's torment of Carson. Forzoi has somehow convinced himself that Matt is a tyrant and thus constantly torments Carson and demands him to "wake up". He is genuinely an evil manifestation and almost feels like a mask-off moment for this comic's heroes, as he prevents Carson from telling the truth by choking him, and also controls his emotions and constantly speaks to him even from a far. He is literally trying to force Carson to change his mind, even if he doesn't want to. Which quite frankly is what the heroes are also trying to do with the rest of the world, except they're able to hide their true intentions behind therapy speak.

Kit n Kay Boodle: Hammer of Love

Yes. I didn't pick any of the real life arcs because they're all lies. Instead the awful repetitive dialogue of Angela is probably the cringiest part of this comic. She constantly keeps talking about T-shaped laywer's Hammer of Love. And this gets worse when the T-shaped lawyer later keeps talking about ISLANDIA PACIFICA as he plans to reform his lawyer group as yiff-defenders. Man, there was so much in common with Kit n Kay Boodle and Gene Catlow, why was I such an idiot and not make the connection while Albert was still alive???

Las Lindas: Alej’s Redemption

Talk about losing all the conflict this comic had. Alejandra was such a good character until this moment, the only character who could stand off against Mora's dictatorship of douchebaggery. I should have quit reading after Alej knocked Mora out, really because nothing after that is worth reading. On top of that Alej's redemption comes out of nowhere. Just because there is a lot of text during these pages doesn't mean they're actually saying anything meaningful. Alejandra turned good because "Oh, how DARE I disagree with Mora??? She is the most PERFECT FUCKING BEING EVER!!!". Go fuck yourself, and being a lesbian doesn't make you any better.

Monster Girl Academy: The Emotional Moment

Gee, what would be the worst moment in the worst webcomic I've ever riffed? It's easy, the moment when longtime friends Zack and Hua kiss for the longest time. It's not really bad if you see it out of context, but it becomes downright rotten when you think about everything surrounding it. In-universe Hua and Zack called eachother little sister and big brother until one day after seeing Zack get a harem Hua was like "I WANNA LOVE YOU TOO" and later when Hua got wet nipples Zack suddenly got super horny and realized just how INNOSEXY and MODEST Hua is. It's such unnatural development of romance, since this shit is written by Kraw, the turbovirgin whose proudest relationship is a lesbian relationship where the other side treats the other more like an object than a person. And then you get to out-of-universe stuff, the fact this whole webcomic exists as a porn comic behind a paywall that doesn't even feature porn that frequently. The fact this comic attempts an emotional moment with Zack and Hua kissing after overcoming their anxiety is so goddamn manipulative. It shows you that Kraw can't stop pretending he isn't writing for the lowest common denominator, and we'll get another moment like that from him later.

Roommates: Captain Peregrine

There are no humans in your world of gay furries, so naturally you turn Captain Falcon into Captain Peregrine. This serves no purpose, why are these characters even playing Smash when two of them ARE in Smash? Is Kirby a furry? Is R.O.B a furry? Are polygon fighters all furries? Is Mr. Game and Watch a furry? Is Mario a furry? Doing this stupid joke because you have no creativity unironically destroys your terrible gay porn comic's universe more than any closeted homophobes would. Also, of course Spelunker and Dreamous are Melee players.

Spinnerette: Abortion Argument

If I had to pick the worst moment among the sea of worst moments, this would be it. Kraw thought it was a good idea to include allegorical arguing about pro-life vs. pro-choice in an arc where Spinnerette turns fat after switching powers with Greta. This causes Spinny to turn her back on Tiger and Mecha Maid, once again being the idiot of the comic.

The inclusion of topical topics in your comic, especially if they're allegorical, will not only date your comic immensely but basically turn you from a writer into a soapbox. You might as well let your twitter feed write your comic. It's so forced and bad, it almost makes you want to support the opposite argument the creator is saying out of spite! It's like a goddamn psyop designed to make that side look bad! If you support abortion, you fap to fat Spinnerette. You can blame this page for Roe v. Wade getting repealed. Thanks Kraw!

Warmage: Spanking Scene

Need I say more?

[bitegore]

woah I just finished reading licanius and I'm feeling lightheaded. do you want to yell about licanius because I want to hear you yell about it. I'm prepared to be so so normal about nethgalla

GOD. AHAHAHAHAA. i always want to yell about licanius

okay first my personal hashtag licanius hashtag experience is worth adding because it explains a lot about which parts i am most insane about. So I first found the first book Shadow of What was Lost back in the ancient years of like 2015 or 2016 or whatever before Islington got his book deal while it was still self-published on Kindle Unlimited instead of being published by any kind of publisher. Back in these years it was just the first book and the others weren't out.

....and surelyt you remember that fucking epilogue thing that Islington loves to do where he puts the Big Reveal right at the end of the book, right? So i spent like a full three or four years going absolutely Bat Shit about just the whole "caeden is also aarkein devaed" bit and then . book 2 comes out and. AUGH. AUUUUUUUGHHHHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAA the fucking. MALSHASH is CAEDEN is AARKEIN DEVAED is TAL'KAMAR why does this man need to be every character. and THEN the fact that CAEDEN DOES NOT KILL DAVIAN. HE GETS HIM FUCKING SELF.

insane. this series makes me insane. literally foaming at the mouth insane.

nethgalla was just like. okay actually i cant lie i kind of love that she fucked up every romantic plotline caeden/tal could've been involved in because i am so glad he did not have any actual romance plot with karaliene or anyone else but how do you invent a character as cool as The Demon Shapeshifter From The Torture Dimension and then fuck it up by being like "and she's obsessed with this guy and exists mostly to be a femme fatale" like come ON. come ON you FLUBBED it. i wish she had more going on with her because even just the idea that she's tied to bhim because he summoned her by fucking up resurrecting his dead wife is like spicy as fuck but then the actual execution is so. like. mid at best? it truly saddens me especially because when Tal shows up she's lame about him but every other time she is SO badass. when she's pretending to be that one hunter she was so badass. when she was tormenting ashalia in the name of making her stronger that kicked ass. they should've kissed. i said what i said

also FUCK LMAO MELDIER AND ALARIC AND ISILIAR AND THE OTHER VENERATE i am SO not normal about them I am obsessed with them I want to put them in my mouth and EAT THEM. i wrote a crossover where Vortex gets recruited into their ranks for an exvent once. i love them so dearly. i spent multiple years bullying my girlfriends into reading the books exclusively so i could get them to write fanfiction about them for me. i love them i want them so dead i'm so glad the story went the way it did but also they deserved better and i wish it didn't happen in the first place. literally the best fucking tragedy ever. i wish we got to watch Wereth's death and Andrael's betrayal and i also wish everything were worse and there was more bad. i am so normal about them.they are so important to me

the fucking shape of this narrative also. this is so circles ever. it makes me lose my fucking mind. look at it it is a self-contained loop (derogatory) (aspirational) this thing is soooooooo the chicken and the egg. its so. its so! i am normal and not insane about it i promise come closer etc etc

[thevindicativevordan]

Any thoughts on Rebirth era of Superman?

Short answer is that it brought me back to the character after I had stopped reading, due to an unending stream of low quality crossovers derailing everything. The long answer is more complicated.

Tomasi's Superman run is like a Yin-Yang symbol. First half is all good except for one bad arc. The back half is all terrible except for the finale. First half does a great job of balancing the wholesome family vibes with horror and action to keep the tension high. Yes you got Jon Kent as a cute kid - Jurgens may have been Jon's father but Tomasi was his daddy in terms of fleshing him out, the Jonathan Kent to Jurgens Jor-El - but Tomasi really put the kid through hell. He accidentally kills his own cat with heat vision, and boy were some people butthurt about that. Personally I loved it, events like that sold me on the struggle of raising a kid who has Superman's powers but not Superman's control.

Jon had a lot of fire and spunk to him, not as much of Lois as I liked (I still firmly believe he should be a Spider-Man type shit talker because of Lois, not a "I know you're better than this" like his dad), but him slugging Damian was a hoot. Tomasi's Clark for the most part was fine, he got that Clark could be an angry dude like when Clark was ready to kick Bruce and Damian's asses after they kidnapped Jon, but Tomasi's Clark was usually pretty flat and Jon was the clear main character. The weirdness of Hamilton simmering under the surface that culminated in Black Dawn was great, like Stranger Things before Stranger Things. Kathy and Jon were cute together. Oh and Tomasi writes a great Manchester Black, that scene of Black freezing Supes heat vision midair to light a cig then sending it back in his face? Hilarious! That his master plan involved trying to corrupt Jon into being the Superman he wanted made sense, and fit with the run's focus on Clark attempting to guide his son into becoming a hero.

The bad arc for the first half was Multiplicity, terrible story with boring filler art. I defy any of you to tell me who the big bad of that story was without looking it up. A multiversal Supermen team up should've been one of the standout arcs, but instead it became a precursor to the back half of the run. Whenever Tomasi tried to focus on just Clark, he clearly didn't have much to say, and the whole story ended up as a weird tangent that went nowhere and never amounted to anything.

After Black Dawn however, we got months of boring filler where Supes clashed with Sinestro and went on a vacation to D.C. with Jon and Lois where Tomasi unleashed his inner boomer to complain about kids not respecting the troops enough. Imperius Lex was a lame way to wrap up the SuperLex storyline, that should've come as a result of Lex refusing to accept that there are lines heroes don't cross because his ego won't accept anything bigger than his own wants. What should have unfolded as a slow disillusionment on Lex's part over the limitations being a hero in the Superman mold places on him, instead became a rushed arc where Lex rage quits because Supes doesn't trust him enough. Thankfully the finale was strong, the Bizarroverse arc was great, Tomasi found that balance of humor, wholesomeness, action, and horror right at the end. Scene where Bizarro bails on his son hit hard for me, and all of the Bizarros were funny to read. Issue 45 where the Kents leave Hamilton hit hard even though I was ready for a change.

Jurgens Action meanwhile was mostly mediocre. Only two arcs stand out in my memory, one good, one awful. The good one was the Godslayers arc where Jurgens amusingly did a better job of handling the Civil War 2 premise than his soon-to-be successor Bendis did. A nice story about Supes grappling with his distaste and distrust of Lex vs. his want to believe Lex can actually change. The other arc solidified Jurgens as the worst Zod writer for me, it's the Booster Gold one right before Action 1000. He loves MoS so why the hell does he insist on writing Zod as only being able to scream KNEEL instead of going with the much more nuanced Shannon portrayal? I am a fan of evil family man Zod though, kudos to Jurgens for that. Other big problem is that the Booster Gold arc is all about Gold stopping Supes from going back and changing things because he needs to accept that the past is the past... except when Lois, Jon, and Sam all get killed while Superman is away, then Gold goes back in time and prevents their deaths without any acknowledgement of how hypocritical that is! It's feebly justified by Gold with Supes already giving up so much (which I guess amounts to Gold being ok with time travel changes if the scale is small enough), but come on Jurgens, way to undermine your very own story! Jurgens Lois & Clark mini remains his best post-Triangle Era Superman work imo.

Of the two major crossovers, Super Sons of Tomorrow was awful while Superman Reborn managed the impressive feat of making none of Superman's origins canon (because Johns dragging his feet with Doomsday Clock meant they couldn't recanonize the Legion of Superheroes), but at least Gleason and Mahkne's art was great. Last time Mxy got to play a major role in anything, and I remain amused that Jurgens of all people ended up using Mxy for a similar purpose to what the Superman 2000 crew wanted to do to his era. Man got the last laugh on Morrison, using Mxy to wipe out New 52 Superman until Morrison and PKJ folded some of that era's ideas back in.

By the end Rebirth was in the same spot the New 52 was where I welcomed another change. Some good ideas - namely Jon, Kenan and the Reborn suit (God I miss that suit) - came out of this era and for that I am thankful. But it's not the ideal era for me the way it is for some, and nostalgia has made people forget that it often stumbled in the same way the New 52 did.

[motherfuckermorgan]

fire emblem warriors thoughts

this game is... so bizarre. with over 6 years of hindsight and several fire emblem releases since then, fire emblem warriors might be the single strangest release in the entire series. i got a lot of words to say about this one, maybe even too much LOL. keep in mind that this post will mostly focus on the main campaign, i do realize that you don't really play warriors games for the main campaign but the grindy ass extra modes you unlock. and from that perspective this game is decently solid, but not as interesting to talk about for me personally

so like, as a "Celebration" of the entire series, this game falls so flat on its face it's honestly kind of hilarious. obviously this game does NOT encompass the entire fire emblem series. it doesn't even really come close. in the main campaign, you get three games represented. awakening, fates, and shadow dragon. you could technically make the argument that this also represents mystery of the emblem since that's just a shadow dragon sequel but that feels like we're trying to grab at anything to make this feel like this game represents more than 20% of the entire franchise. the characters are explicitly from shadow dragon.

in post-game you DO unlock celica from gaiden and lyn from 7 but those are quite literally the only characters from those games. lyn likely got in due to popularity and celica is there because fire emblem echoes released a few months before this. this is the best selling game that celica is in and she's not even in the main game

of course, you can argue this game isn't really trying to celebrate fire emblem as a whole. i mean, it's a fuckin' dynasty warriors crossover so it's not like it HAS to be all encompassing. but we live in a post-three houses and engage world. three houses is still the main fascination of the fandom now, so making a game with a STRONG awakening/fates focus sure makes this game feel dated. it is so, so of a specific era for this series. i think also it's easier for this game to feel lame when heroes exists. i'm not gonna go to bat for the fuckin' gacha but man even if there's still an awakening/fates focus in a lot of the alts, at least you get characters from other games in the series!

and like, alright, the shadow dragon characters are there but they're quite frankly so insignificant that it almost feels odd for me to even pretend like any reasonable person would wait until 66% through the game to finally add marth to their roster of units in play. the main campaign continues to be so awakening/fates focused that the characters from shadow dragon basically just save your ass once and then remove themselves from the plot except for marth saying something motivational every now and then.

the story is not something to play this game for at all LOL. it's not outright awful in the way that fates is but it's very disjointed and overall just not interesting. lianna and rowan are such nothing characters i can see why they haven't been referenced outside of this game thus far. darios is such a nothing villain too, like ohhhhh he's the childhood friend! just kidding! he's possessed by dragon. we've done this song and dance which i suppose is part of the point but it doesn't really help the game set itself apart.

it's a story that's meant to get all these characters together but as mentioned earlier even that part is dubious. early on you get your awakening units and then you get a super long stretch of the game that is focused ENTIRELY on fates. before you get like 2 shadow dragon chapters before endgame. it is near impossible to play this game and use any of the shadow dragon characters from endgame. marth is a tough sell in a game with so many sword users including your protags, you get cordelia before caeda and both pegasus knights are only really worth adding if you don't own the dlc, and tiki is maybe the only one that MIGHT be worth adding to your team.

i also played this game on hard mode which was a fun challenge but actually just serves to make the shadow dragon characters even more irrelevant because of how much higher leveled my units were by the time i made it there. i cannot emphasize enough just how fucking meaningless even adding in the shadow dragon guys is. they barely have any relevance to the flimsy story, and from a gameplay perspective you're basically NEVER gonna use them in the main campaign. you'll have way out leveled them by the time you unlock them. this really is just the awakening/fates show all the way through

if you love awakening and fates i suppose this could be awesome. i do love awakening, but god, i fucking hate fates. i've made this fact about myself known over the years. i could write a much much longer rant about that game specifically but after streaming that game over a week for 42 hours i fear that if i said anything else about them i'd self destruct. i do think that the fates games are Less bad in this game, but only marginally so. takumi and oboro are characters that i do genuinely enjoy from that game, but pretty much no one else is a winner. it's pretty easy to avoid using a lot of them at least, since a bunch of them are sword users or other such weapon classes you get from the awakening pool or are just classes you do NOT want to use.

alright, so i've talked a lot about how this game feels disjointed in terms of how it represents the series, but that isn't even really where it ends in terms of being fucking weird in this aspect. this game retains the weapons triangle from the main games, and every character can equip any weapon from their class. so all sword users can use any non-exclusive swords, lance users can do the same, etc etc. however, with the character choices they made, as a result they kind of all serve the same function? you're only gonna want one sword user to primarily deal with axe users, but your main protagionist is a sword user. you're never gonna reasonably use chrom or corrin or xander or marth or whoever else in this game just happens to use a sword. there are so many of them. many of them are paid dlc! sure, you will end up using one for support on the later maps, so i guess just choose your favorite child to sit on the sidelines.

meanwhile, there are so, so few lance users it's kind of insane. if you don't own the dlc your only real options are all pegasus knights and in a game where archers are very, very mobile they aren't exactly enticing to use. i do own the dlc, so i have access to oboro and azura but if you're rocking the basegame characters you're pretty much fucked in this aspect.

axe users are also fairly underrepresented. at least you get lissa and frederick early, but shit, other than them? hope you like camilla. i don't. she's also a flyer. so she sucks as a character and as a unit.

there's also archers and magic users you can unlock, but honestly, archers are far, far better than the magic users. sure, they don't hit as hard, EXCEPT if there are flyers on the map, then holy shit dude, they delete those fuckers from the video game. it's actually crazy how fast they fall given everything in this game is a damage sponge. archers also tend to be sturdier, so you don't really gotta pay as much attention to them. not as much having to watch over them to make sure they don't get themselves killed on the opposite end of the map. you also unlock tiki as a manakete and same principle applies, you'd rather just have an archer. your options are really just takumi sakura and niles, but hey, just like in fates, takumi is fucking stupid strong and can kill most things with little issue.

i can't pretend like this game isn't fun despite this discrepancy. it is a joy to mow down enemies, and i did feel a little bit of that tactical itch scratched by commanding my units on the harder difficulty. but it does harm this game's replayability a lot. the fun of replaying a fire emblem is getting use out of units that you struggled to find a role for in other playthroughs. this just doesn't happen in this game. with all the dlc, i pretty much will always just use lianna/oboro/lissa/takumi as my main units. there isn't much need to experiment. why try the other characters and other combinations when they will be fundamentally worse?

one last problem is just that the game runs like shit. but that's also kind of like yeah no shit it's a dynasty warriors game on the nintendo switch. it's like asking your old dog to pick up a stick that you threw really far away. he'll get to it eventually, but don't expect peak performance. docked mode is better than handheld, but don't expect this game to ever reach 60 consistently

it is funny playing a game that is so much of this era. three houses came out 2 years later and became THE fire emblem. and we've also got engage now, which at least attempts to represent the full series in a way that warriors fails to achieve. we've even gotten a followup to this game with three hopes! a game that i actually enjoy less. in the same exact console cycle as all these other games, this game feels incredibly dated. truly there is nothing else like it. if you're looking for warriors games on the switch, you've got better options. but i can't pretend like it wasn't fascinating to revisit this game, especially when i had spent so much time on it during the switch's first year. if you're a REALLY curious fan, and awakening/fates is like the peak of the series to you, it might be worth a play if you're into a button mashing action game. lots of things that you're gonna have to ask yourself if they truly apply to you. truly a game of all time

[stierhai]

@clockworkspider​ tagged me, so I’ll give it a whirl!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Thirty.  I keep thinking I should write more, but then I get distracted by roleplaying, deciding to move continents again, that sort of thing.  Not this year because this year I’m moving continents again and I wanna pass the JPLT N2 but next year I think will be the year I do more writing. 

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

119,672 words.  Lame tbh.

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Ante(de)grade(ation) deserves it, though I really think Arc-V is a terrible show.  I feel a little bit bad about my top fic being for a series I think is garbage, because it means I don’t like engaging with people who enjoyed it.  But when I write for something I really like, I get intimidated, so... It’s always something or another.

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Sometimes.  It kind of depends on the comment.  See my commentary on the above question.

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Ante or Capgras Syndrome.  They have the exact same themeing even if the setting/plot is different so I ended them more or less the same way. 

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

The Best Revenge is Living Well or Dear Forgiveness, where these are both very different fandoms but the ending is the same sort of theme: accepting that things have changed and you can’t go back to how things used to be but moving forward while carrying your past with you.  Same-ass ending.  Dear Forgiveness, is about reconciliation and The Best Revenge is about finding understanding, and one is between [Exes?  what the fuck do you call Shu and Nazuna, they’re basically exes] and the other is the Arclight family.  So whichever the reader thinks is happier kind of depends on the reader’s priorities.  I think they’re about even but I’d understand if someone preferred one to the other.

7. Do you write crossovers?

I’ve written three, but the point of two of them was kind of bridging the gap between ygo Zexal and Arc-V since it was originally heavily implied they were the same series but with a time-gap.  Then Konami fucked it, so I lost interest in finishing.  The other was a one-shot that was basically the same function, but with ygo GX + 5Ds.  So technically, yes.  However, I’m not particularly likely to do two casts fell through a portal and meet each other or whatever.  I’m not big into Isekai.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Nope.  I’ve gotten comments like `I don’t usually read incest`, but since they’re complimentary I can’t mind it.  Even though I think it’s a bit silly that they’re telling me their moral stance on the subject matter before being like I liked it anyway though.  If I wrote for bigger fandoms or wrote more prolifically, I’d probably get hate.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I don’t usually, but I’ve written some.  I think the only smut I’ve posted to ao3 was two vampires and it was quite violent.  Like one of them slitting the other from groin to sternum mid-coitus.  So, gratuitous darkfic tbh. 

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of, but also why would you want to.  

11. Have you ever had a fic translated? 

Yes.  Into Chinese.  Ante was one, and I forget the other but I remember giving permission for it.

 12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, Saturnaila which I co-wrote with Kaz.  Honestly, I’d love to co-write more, it’s motivating to be working with another person.

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

All time makes this very hard to qualify.  No idea.

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Saturnaila.

15. What are your writing strengths?

I like to think I’m good at understanding character psychology and writing distinct character voice.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Low motivation.  If I don’t think anyone else is interested (which is most of the time) I probably won’t turn anything out and my tastes are... what they are, so...

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I don’t mind it, so long as the author knows the language in question.  If they google translated though it’s like... please don’t do that.  But I grew up on pretentious Good Omens and Hetalia fic that had footnotes as long as the fics themselves.  I imagine that biases my answer somewhat.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

YGO DM way back in middle school.  I never posted them and they probably exist only in notebooks that have long since been tossed.

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

I’ve got two fics for mcyt I might do at some point, though I’ll likely have to make an alt to post them just because that fandom is insane.  I’ve got more enstars to do at some point, some WataTomo, some EiShu, some IzuLeo. 

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Capgras Syndrome. 

And I’m tagging @hopefulrefrain​!