#kou rambles

[thememorieswithyouthatilost]

next FTE is genuinely just kaoru removing acid’s child safety lock for him 😭

(half serious and half joking)

i’m sprry, i’m gonna be pretty inactive this weekend!! but when we can :3

[dalsoriyam]

I've had enough with aida and iro.

[mercurymacaroons]

arrives 15 min late with a latte

......sup

[thisrobinisred]

Spoilers for TBHK - Especially the more recent chapters

Do you ever start thinking about stuff like how Kou and Mitsuba haven't exactly realised that this is a new/wrong timeline yet. Which is odd, considering Mitsuba is supposed to be dead (and a supernatural) and that Kou is an exorcist. Surely they would notice something is up? But, they don’t. They have the faintest clue, through “dreams” or doing things that they would do routinely without thinking about it - yet it’s not the right way of doing it. For example, when Kou set the table up for only three people (him, Teru and Tiara) instead of five people.

However, one of the biggest, glaring issues about this timeline - one that surely both of them would realise,

That Mitsuba Sousuke died. He, quite literally, shouldn’t be alive. Yet, somehow, in this timeline he is. The funny thing is, that Kou hasn’t realised yet or called it out - despite the fact that in the picture perfect arc, Kou knew something was wrong, even going as far as confronting mitsuba about it. But he hasn’t even noticed anything wrong. Even when Mistuba is going on about these dreams he’s been having during chapter 115, Kou is startled as he’s obviously been experiencing the same; he just shrugs it off, telling Mitsuba they have something else to focus on at the moment.

I know that within the next few chapters, due to Teru and Akane finding them, they’ll most likely find out about the whole timeline situation and quickly connect the dots. However, this got me thinking.

Why haven’t they realised yet?

And that’s when this one thought crossed my mind:

This timeline is something that the two of them have both practically wished for at one point or another in the story.

Let’s start with mitsuba,

Not long after he’s introduced (and dies for the second time), we find out that the wish he made to Tsukasa was for someone to remember him, or to actually have a friend; which was found in the form of Kou, who decided that it didn’t matter if Mitsuba was alive for them to be friends and realised that it was the same boy who sat infront of him during their first year. Something that Mitsuba really wanted.

And then, once he became one of the seven mysteries, he desperately wanted to become, or live a life as close to being, a human. Hence his actions during the Picture Perfect Arc. It’s clear that he doesn’t quite like what’s he became, due to his new and more inhumane tendencies. Additionally, nobody will really ever understand him despite how much anyone, including Kou, tries to help him. Which leads to his want of wanting to be human again and be able to live a normal life. A life that he can spend around his friends and what’s left of his family. A life where he’s closer to the other students, as seen through his worry for the group of younger girls in the photography club which prompted him to ask Kou to check the place out with him.

To add to this, it’s clear that if Mistuba hadn’t died (like in this timeline) that he and Kou would be even closer than they were in the original timeline. This can be seen through the fact that Kou refers to him as Sousuke a few times.

Now let’s have a look at Kou,

During the red house chapters, we end up seeing quite a few of the things that Kou really wants - his desires I guess. Amongst these wants, is two specific people.

His late mother and Mistuba Sousuke. (I do know that this version of Mitsuba that he sorts of wants is really clingy and is acting like he can only rely on Kou and that he, himself, is useless etc. However that is a complete other ramble about Kou and how he feels about Mitsuba- but I think you get the point on why I mention him-)

In this new timeline, both his mother and Mitsuba, are present and alive. The exact thing that Kou had wanted.

He doesn’t even question how they’re there. No remarks, or concerns or visible confusion. He’s acting as if this is his normal every-day life.

Perhaps this is why the two of them haven’t quite realised that this isn’t where they’re supposed to be. That this isn’t their place in reality. After all, for the first time in a while, things have gone mostly their way (even without them having any hand in causing this situation) without things being too devastating.

This timeline is practically their ideal world.

A timeline they won’t be able to stay in.

A timeline only good for them.

Once again sorry if this isn’t written too well- I just kind of get thoughts about the characters and start rambling without thinking about what I’m writing- lmao

[mywifeismothman]

Aidairo has ruined my life but I just can’t stop reading Tbhk. It’s come to the point where the looming dread of the ending and all I’ve learned about the characters causes me to cry every time I think too long about the series, every single new chapter kills me. (crying writing this right now)

It’s such a good story, with well crafted characters and lore, but god forbid you get attached to any of the characters, because either half of them are dead, or you know they’ll end up horribly depressed and/or traumatized.

AND CHAPTER 118, AIDAIRO LET THEM BE HAPPY FOR MORE THAN 5 MINUTES PLEASEE

My favorite character is kou, but at this point , he’s more of a discomfort character than a comfort character. I literally can’t think about him for too long without crying.

I need someone to rant to about all the intricacies of this series, none of my friends have read past the part that appeared in the anime and it’s killing me.

JUST LOOK AT THESE PANELS

(Spoilers for chapter 118)

THE ONE TIME THEYRE ABLE TO BE HAPPY, THEY ARE HAUNTED BY THE WORLD WHERE THEY COULDNT BE, I HATE YOU AIDAIRO.

IN THIS WORLD KOU CALLS MITSUBA BY HIS FIRST NAME, GOD PLEASE BE LESS TRAGIC

WHY DO MITSUBA AND KOU CHAPTERS HAVE TO BE SO BITTERSWEET, THEY SPEND HALF THE TIME BEING DEPRESSING, THEN DROP SOME OF THE SWEETEST INTERACTIONS THAT SHOW HOW MUCH THEH CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER, IM GOING TO CRY SO HARD WHEN THEY INEVITABLY HAVE A SAD ENDING.

THIS CHAPTER AND THE NIGHT OUT ARC ARE KILLING ME

Also, I’m really curious what happened to the Amane on this world. Tsukasa is dead, so he should have lived a full life, but he died young still. I’m really interested in what he’s doing in the red house still, and the truth about the monster under the house. Not to mention the weird hole thing going on with his and Tsukasa’s face.

[hanakou-often]

In celebration of my own propellor hat coming in I propose an au where everything is exactly the same except Hanako wears a propellor hat instead of his cap!!!

[daisyachain]

I’ve made this post before but I can’t be bothered to find it. In what we commonly consider a ‘traditional’/patriarchal European society, the paths in life are: marriage with children (acceptable), bachelorhood (frowned upon, locked out of certain professions/roles), spinsterhood in servitude to parents (probably suffering), religious servitude. An unmarried person is a servant either of the local lord, the Lord, or the parents. The parental relationship has a built-in hierarchy of the senior parents and the underling child. All pressures push down and toward marriage as a form of (highly limited for women) freedom.

One of the few ways around this system is the sibling relationship. Sticking with a sibling can provide an avenue to independence from hierarchy via a peer relationship, a person who moves in with a married sibling is protected under the auspices of that marriage (though somewhat dependent on the sibling) and is not automatically subordinate as with aristocracy/religious orders/parents. I’m interested in the sibling relationship as a kind of lifeline or shield against the buffets of social expectation specially in a world where there is some kind of censure against unmarriage and in which marriage is seen as the final step in growing up. Siblings are the playmates of childhood, they are biological family, to remain part of s biological family unit is acceptable, to remain unmarried is not, the sibling is the last line of defense against a spouse without submitting to hierarchy and/or could be read as the last line of defense against growing up.

This isn’t coherent. I like the idea of two siblings choosing to remain close into adulthood not because they necessarily like each other that much, but because they understand the consequences of abandoning someone to social forces. Siblings as a kind of delayed maturation, a sign that something is wrong, a failed evolution, a vestigial relationship, you’re supposed to be close growing up and then split into different clans, but they have failed to do so and have closed the loop to return to childhood.

[iwoulddieforienzo]

Something really great about the persona 2 cast is that they all individually fucking SUCK to talk to casually. Every single one of them. They are all infuriating. We have:

Tatsuya, who will stare at you blankly if you try to initiate conversation (IS) and will dip without saying a word afterward (EP)

Batsuya, who will scoff and brush you off/otherwise act dismissive

Eikichi, who might honestly be the best to talk to in the IS crew and that is not saying much, who WILL talk extremely loudly over you (probably not on purpose?) and will not be paying particularly close attention to the conversation beyond whatever he wants to say (gets points for talking about his gf. gets points taken away for constantly talking about his gf)

Lisa, who will automatically assume bad faith and will be rude to you the entire conversation unless you manage to defuse her temper (good luck)

Jun, who is uncommunicative at BEST and requires an encyclopedic knowledge of flowers, metaphor and body language just to get a HINT on what he’s thinking, and who will be extremely polite but completely unhelpful. If you tried asking him what he wants for dinner I guarantee it will be the longest 30 minutes of your life as he goes “oh I have no opinion :) whatever you want. :))” EXCEPT HE DOES HAVE OPINIONS. He has SO MANY OPINIONS. He is Expecting you to be able to pick up on his “obvious” clues. He will be passive aggressive if you don’t. (Jun babygirl you suck so bad I love u)

Maya, who is a delight but will very quickly become grating if you try to talk to her about anything serious as she hits you with the white suburban mom's "how to live a happy, healthy life" lifecoach slogans. You can’t even mention, like, stepping in a puddle or something without her hitting you with the positivity beam.

Yukino is great actually. 10/10. She’s fabulous we love her. Incredible conversationalist, chill and fun and easy to get along with. But she’s from Persona One, she doesn’t Count.

Ulala, who WILL bring up her relationship problems in every conversation within 10 minutes at least once. Any longer and she will start talking about Maya.

Do I even need to explain Baofu. Have you seen him.

And finally, Katsuya, who is a cop and a kiss ass and Very Obvious about these things. Also he can't talk to women. He can barely talk to men. Help Him.

And yet they all work wonderfully as a group. They are so annoying I love them

[cherrypicked-pearls]

Some Hanakou smooches and a weird comic/storyboard thing from my Summer Stupor fic!!!

[ktarogf]

18+ bc suggestive at the end

sitting on the kitchen counter at too early in the morning and watching kou make his morning protein shake before he heads to training

he’s only in his msby sweats and he’s totally not flexing his back muscles a little more than he needs to bc he knows you’re watching him

you hop off the counter to place a small kiss on his shoulder blade (his favorite part of the mornings) as he pours the shake into his cup.

he turns around and asks, “ya wanna taste? just to make sure it’s good” you’re expecting him to leave a little left in his shaker for you to drink. instead, he dips his finger into the strawberry drink, puts his finger in your mouth and orders you to suck .

[thememorieswithyouthatilost]

OKAY IM CONFUSED

@kantah

WHAT IS DASHA DOING

[eatmy-customjorts]

good morning mitsukou nation 💕

[twitteringthings]

Fresh Thoughts Chapter 57

After reading spoilers on twitter (no spoilers here though^^)

The way Yoneda uses bl stereotypes as a tool while also rejecting some aspects of the genre is so interesting to read. In most bl I've read, sex is seen as the epitome of love - the culmination of two characters' pining and is seen as the end goal that suddenly fixes everything. The dick and brain are one and suddenly everything magically makes sense. But in Saezuru, Yoneda uses sex to unravel the characters while twisting them up even more-so. I believe that sex has never been and will never be the answer for Doumeki or Yashiro, and I think that is what she’s getting at. That is the point of all these sexual encounters that yield no real progress. You need more than three words and some head, ding dongs!

Doumeki thinks that all he has to do is give Yashiro passionate and gentle sex to make him realize that he loves him and imo he has it all wrong. It’s almost like Doumeki doesn’t truly hear Yashiro when he speaks. There's a pause and then a kiss or a continuing of sex as we've seen. I really wish he would’ve probed even further with the questioning instead of giving into desire and kissing Y. To me, it looked like Y was ready to talk more or hear what Doumeki had to say in response to his ‘confession.’

I don’t think D realizes that this is about Y and his view of himself. It doesn’t matter if Doumeki treats him kindly and calls him beautiful. Every person in Yashiro’s life has had an agenda against him or a plan to use him for something (nana excluded). There are always, always strings attached and his heart cannot accept anyone having no intention at all, except to love him purely. I do think D is on the right track though, making Yashiro chase him in a way. Not giving anything away as to make Y either trust his intentions or distrust him, Y needs to choose for himself.

It’s so interesting how the relationship between the two of them is outwardly focused on the physical aspect (which is definitely important), but the story is about the hearts of men. Twisted and broken men. Men with baggage and secrets and deep wounds. Men who seem to be the upmost composed but in reality, the soft touch of a feather can send their entire fortress crashing down. That's what we have here.

Yashiro’s coping mechanism protects him but is also the cause of his continuous pain. Saezuru is about choosing the right pain, the pain that will numb you and have you walk through life as a ghost, or the excruciating discomfort in accepting a foreign act of kindness that you know will save you. And for Yashiro, being saved means there was something wrong done to him in the first place - which I don't think he completely realizes yet. This would mean everything he ever told himself was a lie, and that he deserved none of the cruelty. The truth that would destroy him the most if he truly chose and accepted kindness, is that he is a good person and that he deserves to love himself and to be loved. With Doumeki, this has always been Yashiro’s battle.

Vile actions accompanied by cursed words are what has held Y back all his life from the moment he was raped by his stepfather and throughout the continued abuse, even up to the most recent events post-timeskip. And I think the exact opposite is needed from both sides to finally free both of them from their mental prisons. They just need to hold out and to talk to each other for more than five minutes. I hope they'll get there soon.

Lastly, I'm sure it wasn't her intention to make such an impactful story that subverts a genre and goes against the grain - in a wonderful way. I saw something another person posted that said this story and these characters are just a result of good storytelling and great care and I could not agree more.

I haven't posted anything of actual substance in a while (stupid work is stopping me from my true passion - alas!). These are some messy thoughts; I can't wait to read the actual chapter for true understanding! I need to analyze every pen stroke, blush, and body placement. I just had to get this out of my head, now back to my essay that's due at 11:59 *sobs*

Edit 1:55 am: Still have not started essay

[thisrobinisred]

Spoilers ahead The kisaragi station AU’s ending really just felt like a reminder about Mitsuba and Kou’s inevitable ending. The fact that, no matter what they do, no matter what universe it is, they can never truly be together.

And we have seen this time and time again.

Starting from Mitsuba’s death.

Then they reunite, but Tsukasa intervenes.

And this affects Kou greatly, to the point where he feels like he can no longer fail when protecting people or making promises. Eventually they meet again,

But he’s no longer the Mitsuba Sousuke. Sure he looks and acts like him (and is made from a part of him), but he doesn’t have his memories or experiences. Kou is clearly shown to be practically heartbroken by this. Perhaps it’s because of this, that Mitsuba wants to know who he is properly, and to know his original past. Which eventually leads to the picture perfect arc. Where Mitsuba knows a bit about himself now, aswell as Kou. Through Mitsubas actions you can tell that he really does want to be friends with Kou. Yet they’re both aware that this is all fake. Mitsuba knows that who Kou really wants is the original one. However..

Kou was perfectly willing, happy even, to kill himself to be with Mitsuba - so that Mitsuba wasn’t alone anymore. But, Mitsuba doesn’t want this for Kou so in the end he intervenes. When they return to the real world, he still keeps an eye on Kou. To the point where during the summer sleepover he even goes to Kou to try and help him with his problems after overhearing the conversation between Yokoo and Satou.

But merely hours later, the severance occurs. Separating them once more. During this, Yashiro and Kou meet Mitsubas mother. It’s during this that Kou seems to finally process the fact that he is dead, and has been for a while now.

Seemingly out of nowhere, once supernaturals are able to return to their world, Mitsuba goes to Kou. Which is nice, but Mitsuba ends up asking Kou to exorcise him. Obviously, Kou refuses to, why would he even ask him that in the first place? Then everything with the clock keepers happen, causing them to make a new present.

But it’s different. Basically everyone who is dead, is alive. And for one of the first times, both mitsuba and Kou are alive, happy and close, without it being fake. In a timeline where everything is practically messed up for everyone else (especially their relationships and friendships) it isn’t for these two. Which is another reminder of why they will never be able to stay together. Everything that makes the original timeline the original, is what keeps them apart. So, just like mitsuba said in the kisaragi station AU,

‘I can’t follow you anymore.’ He is incapable of being able to join Kou.

They can never walk the same path forever, as one way or another, they’ll never get their happy ending together. Perhaps that’s why in this event Mitsuba wasn’t wearing either of his scarfs, as it doesn’t really matter which one he is for it will always end like this for the originals.

Sorry I’m not really good at wording things and I’ve never doing anything like this before-

[hanakou-often]

HANAKOU NATION START YOUR ENGINES!! Even though February's months away, I wanted to give people (me) ample time to get their ducks in a row. While I'm only on tumblr, I'm aware that there's other Hanakouers on other platforms so feel free to participate/share this on other places too!! If y'all have any questions, my inbox is always open! C:

[maramarabum]

I can't sleep so it's tbhk theory time

Okay so this is something i have posted before, but now i'm gonna lay more examples supporting my theory

The theory being that everything (or most of) what Tsukasa does is based on Hanako's wishes, based mostly on old chapters

So situation one: Chapter 19, The one where Mitsuba dies

So in this chapter we find out that Tsukasa grants wishes of supernaturals, and we also see that he does it in very unconventional and grotesque ways, as we see him granting Mitsuba's wish of having many friends by turning him into this weird ass monster. And I think in this chapter, we also see him granting Hanako's wish for the first time in the series, but we will get to that later.

Chapter 21, The Tea Party and the door dimension

Yashiro gets kidnapped by Tsukasa and the rest broadcasting room gang to a tea party, the reason being, apparently, to kill her by drowning her in the room, but even as Yashiro herself points out, it doesn't really seem like they actually want to kill her

The weird water that they drowned her in instead transported her to the door dimension that can lead her anywhere, and this is where she goes through the door that leads her to the dimension where Hanako is a living student at her school (and then she gets transported to the current year. oh well).

I know it's a lot of talk and no explenation but bear with me we will get there soon

Chapter 32, Then Mitsuba becomes a school mystery

So 11 chapter later we get direct confirmation that Tsukasa in fact does not want Yashiro to die

And most importantly, we find out Tsukasa actually remade Mitsuba

And this is where it gets to the connection point of the chapters discussed

Kou asks why did Tsukasa remake Mitsuba if he was the one to kill him, to which he answers:

""Just because?" "There was a movie I watched with Amane with an artificial human, I wanted to make one" "But, I dunno... pretty cool, right?"

A hell of an unsatisfactory answer, and he sounds really unpassionate and not really sure, forming the answer more like a question, almost like he's thinking about the reason at the spot, which is exactly what i think hes doing, and it's not the first time.

Chapter 21, the reason he wants to kill Yashiro. We know for a fact that's not how he views his relationship with Hanako, and he literally ends the sentence with "Well, whatever. Anyway."

Chapter 19, asked by Hanako why he turn Mitsuba into that weird ass monster, similiar to chapter 32, he starts with a "hmm..." and thinks for a minute, before actually answering (except this time, his actual answer seems more honest, in a way)

It's really easy to tell when he's hiding his actual motives. And the actual motives, what were they?

To get an answer to that, we don't exactly look for direct quotes for Hanako saying what he wishes for, we more start to speculate what he might be wishing for inside, what he doesn't say.

It's really not that hard, take for example, Hanako wishing he could have somehow met Yashiro when he was still alive, which is exactly what Tsukasa caused in chapter 21

This would be his true intentions behind sending Yashiro to the door dimension.

So how about the whole Mitsuba thing? Well, Hanako was never really happy about Kou having a crush on Yashiro. He has probably thought something like "I wish he would stick to someone else" at least once, right?

And then Kou brings over a ghost student his age to the bathroom stall, asking him how can he deal with him instead of exorcism

Hanako looks like hes getting a bad feeling about him (is he... you know...)

"I want friends. I want to stay with my friends..." Here we have the exact wish that allowed him to "kill" Mitsuba, while also granting his and Hanako's wish. If Tsukasa didn't do anything, Mitsuba would be free to go. He found a friend, and his unfinished business is done. But then, Kou wouldn't stick around with him anymore, so Hanako's wish wouldn't be granted, and also Tsukasa would have taken no part in granting Mitsuba's wish.

The actual way Tsukasa wanted to grant these wishes is by letting Mitsuba turn Kou into a supernatural similar to him, quote "If you make him just like you... you could be together forever, huh?" (THE PARALLELS THE PARALLELS UNRELATED TO THIS THEORY OHHH THE MITSUKOU PARALLELS GOD DESTROY ME SMITE MY BEING)

Directing Mitsuba, guiding him what to do, while also making it seem like it's his own choice, like it's what he wants.

But then Hanako comes over and kills him before that can happen. And he doesn't even look like his confused about whats happening, but he still asks Tsukasa, asks why is he doing this, like he want's a conformation.

Because he knows it was because of him.

Since Tsukasa could tell what Mitsuba wished for because Mitsuba already made a deal with him, it would mean Hanako made a deal with Tsukasa too, all these years ago, a wish that might have been "a little vauge". And also, Hanako doesn't know which one of his thoughts made Tsukasa do this, considering his ways of granting anything are very off the wall, and also, as we discussed before, Tsukasa won't tell him.

(Hanako touching his seal after Kou asks Yako about Mitsuba. His face looking sorrowful, like he's thinking about something)

All he knows is that this happened is because he met Yashiro. He hasn't seen his brother for 20-50 years, and he showed up right after Yashiro became his assistant.

His ghost "life" was boring, nothing really happened, and he stopped wishing for anything. He accepted that he had no future, he needed to take care of the school so he could gain god's forgiveness. But then Yashiro showed up, and his life suddenly was more eventful, he now had a girl to protect. Then after her Kou showed up, and now he had two friends who still had young hope in them.

And it rubbed off on him, it had awakened some hope in him too, made him start wishing again. And now his friends are paying the price of that.

And also it's almost 4 A.M. now as I'm writng this.

So yeah if you have any thoughts on this, other examples or something that contraries my theory please reblog and let me know, i would really like to hear it

(me right now)