#kerra really doesn't fully break like that very much

[kerra-and-company]

for kerra (and anyone else whose answer would be interesting), has she ever hurt anyone, badly, who didnt deserve it?

Oh, that's a good one, because the answer is yes.

Under the cut for discussion of suicidal thoughts/feelings.

Kerra follows a lot of the personal story pretty directly, which also means she did a lot of running around and helping Destiny's Edge figure itself out. The relevant incident in this case involves the events of Honor of the Waves.

Eir has gone north to help the kodan who live on the ship sanctuary, and she's basically doing this because she feels that she can't make up for the mistakes she's made and wants to go out as a hero. She feels like she's useless to her friends. Kerra and Caithe go to both help and make sure she doesn't do "anything rash", is I think how Caithe puts it.

Timeline-wise, this occurs not all that long after the Pact's been officially established and set up in Fort Trinity. Kerra is...not doing all that great. She's actively working to prepare the Pact to make the trek towards Zhaitan, and this is the first time she's ever fully shouldered that weight. She's just lost Tonn not all that long ago and is dealing with a renewed surge of guilt/responsibility over not just his death but everyone else who she's lost in her life. She's Not Doing Great, to say the least--the only reason she's not doing something like Eir's trying to do is because she has responsibilities to the Pact and her Wyld Hunt and she knows people are counting on her.

The combo of Kerra not being okay at this point and Eir reflecting a similar state back at her results in Kerra dealing with the situation really badly. She's usually pretty careful with her words--she's skilled at diplomacy and also just personal interaction--and she really doesn't ever actively throw insults or accusations at anyone who doesn't deserve it. She did this time, though.

Eir insists that she's made up her mind, that she's set in what she's doing, and Kerra snaps. She screams--VERY loudly--at Eir. That she's being incredibly selfish, that of course her friends need her, she's running away and how dare she, she's selfish, she's selfish, she's selfish--

And Eir turns around and heads further into the ship.

Kerra, Caithe, and the kodan with them follow Eir, and she is physically all right and the dungeon does roughly follow the original story, but Eir and Kerra are on very weird terms for a while after that. Kerra doesn't have a chance to properly apologize until after Zhaitan's defeat, at which point she does the wreath thing. Eir accepts the wreath and said apology. The two of them are never bosom buddies, but they do become fairly decent friends afterwards. Kerra still immensely regrets what she said and likely always will--she hurt a friend and ally and someone she respected with words she usually directed at herself.

[kerra-and-company]

💍🎁💧 for 💜Kerra💜

Kerra asks!! :D <3 Coming right up!

💍 Does your OC have a specific item that is priceless to them but may (or may not) be completely worthless to someone else? Is there a story behind this item or is it just because they like it so much?

Kerra has a couple of these! She still has the little satchel she was given when she first awoke just outside the Grove--it has bits of her pod in it, along with a few different herbs, including lavender. And she holds onto the doll that she helped make for Aurene when she was a hatchling.

🎁 What would be the perfect gift to buy your OC? What would be the worst gift? Are they themselves any good at gifting things or are they really indecisive? How do they wrap their presents?

Good gifts for Kerra: something useful (can be used for its intended purpose and Kerra would indeed have occasion to use whatever it is), thoughtful (the person put sentiment behind the gift and truly meant it positively as something that either they thought Kerra would like or something they would have liked to receive themselves), or handmade (never necessary but always loved). Bad gifts for Kerra: not much, honestly, unless you decided to be an ass and buy her an urn full of heroic ashes or something xD In all seriousness, she'd be happy with most gifts unless a) it's just not something she'd really ever use, though she'd never be rude/confrontational about that, or b) it's specifically poking at trauma in some way.

Kerra's pretty good at gift-giving! She's not an expert, but she's usually able to find something that the person will like pretty quickly. And she doesn't usually wrap presents in the standard sense; she's more likely (unless this would be impractical for some reason) to do the put-object-in-a-nice-bag-with-nice-tissue-paper kinda wrapping.

💧 What makes your OC lose hope, what makes them give up and feel helpless? Have they ever given up on something really important or let go of a dream? What are some of their biggest regrets? Would they ever try again (if they’re able to)?

Ah boy. All right. Well.

Kerra is not someone who gives up on important things easily, and she has historically been terrible at letting things go. She wouldn't let her brother go and very easily could have died trying to save him; she, despite having a not-so-great relationship with her Wyld Hunt, always intended to finish it; and, she felt so strongly about both her job and the people she loved that when she died she refused to stay dead. The one thing that really made her lose hope was losing Aurene. Luckily in my canon, the period before Aurene's resurrection was under a week, but Kerra did not sleep at all that entire time and was only avoiding breaking down by doing literally everything she could to distract herself. She was in Sun's Refuge doing anything that needed to be done, for the most part. But if it had been any longer than that, she would have fully shattered, probably. It was (very! understandably!!) hard on her.

As for regrets? People she couldn't save. Never being able to be young without the weight of expectations hanging over her head. Not being able to fully protect her own children from expectations either. Not being able to prevent any number of things, including the Pact fleet crash...I could go on. She has a lot.

(And I think the "trying again" is more on things she's given up on in the past, which isn't super applicable here. So I'll just go with no.)

[kerra-and-company]

QUESTION TIME. How do they react when they're suddenly hit with the realization that they have fallen for someone? Let's say they've been hanging out and getting along as well as they can, and BAM, while they're laying down to sleep they suddenly realize they're in love and/or want to give that person a smooch???? For.. anyone, surprise me :3 - @moonlit-grove

I'm late on responding to this because my brain really wanted to write you a five-page essay on all the thoughts on my characters' romances in my brain, aslkdjfad. The only problem with that is I have literally had no time to do so because School...so! I shall provide short blurbs instead! :D Kerra - The realization kinda snuck up on her, but she wasn't completely oblivious to it. She realized she'd gone and fully fallen in love one night in Maguuma when Nisha and Canach were trading sarcasm/one-liners back and forth. She opened her mouth to ask them to stop and realized she was about to say, "Hey, I love you, but we need to get at least a bit of rest tonight." It freaked her out for a second because loving them like that made her even more afraid to lose them, but she quickly decided that she did still want to tell them once everything calmed down. And she did. Nisha - Xe figured out that xe had crushes on Kerra and Canach relatively early, both during LWS1. Xe is a chronic overthinker and thus thought about it to hell and back, but xe also figured that Kerra, at least, would do something if she felt the same way, and thus considered xemself to be more or less stuck pining (all the way up until Kerra's confession after HoT). (And xe actually did have the "shooting straight up in bed" kinda realization-of-love moment later on in Maguuma after a conversation with Cio.) Cio - She figures out that she's in love with Ari during PoF and has no idea what to do with that information. They're most definitely friends at this point and have been since Maguuma, and more than that, they're a team--pilot and engineer, agent/keeper and archon, hand-to-hand and distance. They click, and they work well, but Cio is absolutely terrified to lose Ari like she lost Sieran, and thus keeps her mouth shut. However, she also doesn't exactly hide her feelings after the first few months, so although Ari doesn't pick up on it, her brother Pliarr definitely does. She only confesses during Icebrood, once Ari does. Ari - She's in love with Cio at least as long as Cio's in love with her, but she straight-up doesn't recognize that until Icebrood. Reuniting with Brook and Casca (her old 'bandmates) breaks down a few walls that were still stubbornly staying up, and some feelings--like the bit where she's been in love with Cio for YEARS--end up getting a lot more clear. She stays up all night after that realization, which makes for a very disheveled-looking morning confession the next day. Worth it, though. Rel - He goes to Orr with Trahearne during the period when Kerra's learning from Tybalt in the Order of Whispers, which is when he starts really crushing on the Firstborn. By LWS1, he's starting to realize that his feelings go deeper than that, which is--totally coincidentally, of course--around the time Kerra starts teasing him about it. He spends the entirety of LWS2 trying to decide if confessing is a thing he should do or not, but he hasn't done so before the Pact fleet takes off. So the closest thing he has to a big moment of realization is how terrified he is when he sees Trahearne's airship fall out of the sky--while on another falling airship himself, and completely ignoring that part of the situation. Brook and Casca - These two...I was going to say they have the most straightforward love confession thing, which is technically true, but they're also separated for a Decent Amount of Years later on, so their story definitely isn't overall straightforward. Anyways! They've been close since they were very young cubs, so they've pretty much always loved each other; it just evolved from friend-love to romantic-love as they got older. Casca was the first one to have that realization, which was pretty much just: 1) she was sitting next to Brook in the evening when they both were about 13, 2) she realized that she thought they were kinda pretty, 3) she realized that she wanted to kiss them, and 4) she asked if she could--step 4 was the part that made Brook go "oh, okay, I think I want that too." The extra step 5 is that they said yes.