#katya was my original name for her bcs I wanted to keep up the thing

[end-orfino]

I saw the tumblr sexymen descendants thing going around and I saw that like 2 people made a kid for Habit but. Well. Couldn't really help myself

She has that goofy shadow form too. Creeps around the school like this sometimes (if we're to assume that it's a boarding school. Or that she broke in to care for her plants on a free day)

[drabbles-of-writing]

heyo! same anon who had the "Raine adopts Hunter" au and i come bearing HCs! ok ok ok so basically Raine Knows about lil rascal bc they were leaving a note and heard the sound of bird chirps and the soft thunk of wood on wood. as a result they sometimes leave little pet toys they find along with the other notes and gifts. Hunter meanwhile is DEADSET on figuring out who tf is leaving shit under his door all the time and he set up all sorts of dumb booby traps (as much as he could being in the castle) and every time Raine just- uses their bard magic to hide themselves or something and it pisses off Hunter to NO END. but at the same time Hunter starts to think of the letter bringer as a parent figure since they give advice in their letters about an area hes going to for a mission or brings him candy if he gets punished for something stupid. and then Hunter first finds out that Raine was the letter bringer when lil rascal saw their picture in the news about them being caught and making sad noises and Hunter just starts to think about the timeline and how insanely op bard magic can be in the right hands and you can almost hear the gears turning until he goes "oh shit thats THEM" and rushes off to recruit the owl fam to steal back his psuedo parent. when Eda finds out that the little twit Raine was leaving shit for was THE FUCKING GOLDEN GUARD AND ALSO LUZ KNEW HIM TOO AND DIDNT SAY ANYTHING???? shes just. so confused. but a person she loves is on the line and the kid doesnt seem too bad underneath the mask.

Hunter, kicking in the front door of the owl house: HEY DO YOU GUYS WANNA PISS OFF BELOS Eda: I mean, yes, always, but who are you

Hunter originally just wanted Luz specifically but Luz was immediately like "yeah I should probably get Eda's help for this I do Not want to face Belos on my own again" and the two of them figh each other as Luz is trying to wriggle out of his grip going "EDAAA EDA I HAVE SOMETHIN TO TELL YOU" and Hunter is trying to strangle her to keep her Quiet

Eda shows up and is like "who??? are you??" and Hunter is about to just say his name and leave it at that. just a normal witch boy here don't mind him but of course Luz is just deadpan "hes the golden guard. we're kind of friends. i wanna help him anger belos" and Hunter immediately tries to strangle her again

Eda is going about a million miles an hour when Hunter also brings up "yeah i wanna rescue Raine Whispers bc they were kinda nice to me n stuff and I feel really bad" and Eda is almost hysterical like "RAINE??? YOU????? WHEN THE HELL DID RAINE GET A KID" but honesty shes just trying to focus on one thing at a time and grabs everyone like "okay yes we can rescue Raine but lets rescue their Batts friends first since we could use some help, and also Katya probably knows the prison pretty well by now" and thus its a bunch of hijinks to try and rescue Raine but then they find Raine is mind controlled in some thicket stuff and both Hunter and Eda are Not having a good time right now

[coasttocoastreads]

Welcome back to Week 2 of Coast to Coast Reads! Who’s still alive? Katya and I are dying while social distancing, but at least we had a few laughs discussing this book:

Crescent City (House of Blood and Earth) // Sarah J Maas

★★ / ★★★★★

Summary in one two gif(s):

Real Summary:

Crescent City, a place where vanir (supernatural beings such as angels, fae, shifters, etc.) and humans freely mingle and go about their days. Bryce Quilan is a 20-something fae/human who’s still reeling from the murder of her friends 2 years ago. But after she’s commissioned to help search for an ancient artifact, Bryce, along with her new angel partner Hunt, unearth previously buried secrets about the murder that threaten to expose a worldwide conspiracy. 

Pros:

Great side characters. I would die for each and every one of them.

Lots of different mythological creatures! Not just another Fae Book™️

Cons:

It’s literally ToG 2-7 combined. If you read Throne of Glass, you’ve already been spoiled for this book. 💀💀💀

It’s wayyyy too long

Drags a lot in the beginning

Plot .5/5 (the .5 is for you, Lehaba)

What can I say. SJM literally plagiarized herself by taking the plotline of the tog books and translating it to this new setting. The writing itself was subpar, and most of the time it felt like the author herself had no idea where the plot was going, instead letting it drag on until a plot twist that makes no sense is revealed. (You’ll know which one I’m talking about when you get there.) I’ll compare CC with ToG with spoilers under the cut. 

Pacing 2/5

The beginning is full of info-dumping as SJM tries to set up this world which is metaphorically like ours, but everyone’s hot and does fantasy cocaine all the time.  It narrates boring day-to-day schedules that could have been condensed into a paragraph and at times I was tempted to skip ahead. The plot does pick up near the last 25% though, so I’ll give it that. 

Worldbuilding 2.5/5

It was confusing. To be fair, after all the info was dumped at the beginning, I didn’t bother going back to try to figure things out when they popped up again after. But like still??? I think I only started understanding the hierarchy of the government with the Asterrii(?). Also what are the Triarii I am still lost. SJM attempts to blend a more modern society with one of fantasy creatures, and for the most part it succeeds, but it often just feels...strange. I think the one thing I’m most hung up about is why swords and guns still coexist. Like ??????? it’s one or the other plssssss abandon the “aesthetic” Also while they literally have cell phones and keurig machines there aren’t common things like cars? Why.

Characters: (This is unconventional, bear with me)

Main Characters: -infinity/5 they could go die for all I care

Bryce and Hunt were both super unlikeable, 10/10 would let fall from a cliff. They are literally just rewrites of Aelin and Rowan? Bryce is like ahahaha yeah people think I’m Just a dumb vapid Female™️ who parties too much and gets trashed but SIKE I’m actually the chosen one and I’ve been hiding it this whole time because I didn’t want to hurt people’s feelings uwu. And did I mention I’m actually a trained Warrior who can keep up with The Boys? It’s Aelin y’all. There are numerous times where a character says that she’s not stupid and I’m like...are you sure... This girl makes the poorest decisions, yet ofc, there aren’t any long term consequences... (Also 99% of her problems come from ghosting people literally just respond with “k” sis)

Hunt is... idek what to say about Hunt. He’s just Rowan but in angel form. His inner monologue cycles between I must pay off my debt so I can gain Freedom 😔, why is Bryce so hot 🥴, and Shahar 😭. Once again, literally Rowan who also was bound to some evil villain, had the hots for their CENTURIES YOUNGER pupil/protectee, and had an old lover die tragically which led to them believing they can never find love again UNTIL BryLin comes along. Snooze. 

Side Characters: Infinity/5 

Ruhn Danaan was the most valid character and that’s the hill I’ll die on. He literally just wanted to protect his sister cuz she’s stupid af but she keeps pushing him away bc he’s an “alphahole” (haha how subversive :/) I want a whole book about him and Hypaxia, preferably fanfiction so I don’t have to read “soft feminine breathing” ever again.

Literally all the supporting cast- Lehaba, Therion, Ithan, Jesiba, Flynn, Connor, etc, etc. had more compelling characters and side stories than Bryce/Hunt. I was 100% more invested in them and I can’t wait to read/write more about them. 

(Pls let me marry Jesiba Roga or Therion 🥺)

But while the people on the “good” side were spectacular, the villains all felt one-dimensional and the product of over-recycled and overused tropes mashed together. Sandriel and Pollux are literally just Maeve and Cairn (is that his name)

I’d recommend for:

People who loved Throne of Glass and are lamenting the absence of new content. Please read about Rowaelin 2.0

People stuck at home during this global crisis and have too much time on their hands. (If you need that free epub, hmu)

People who are willing to skip all scenes that feature just Bryce and/or Hunt 

People who hate themselves

Would I travel here?

Sorry, what? Already shredded my passport, not getting a replacement, sorry. 

Overall thoughts:

I wish I could somehow take those hours of my life back but alas. 

See y’all in two weeks with a hopefully better book selection,

Tiff

Spoilers under cut

Okay time to VENT

OKAY so CC=ToG, let’s break down how

Danika’s death is the Nehemia Incident, setting the mc up for a journey of self discovery/reclaiming their power. They both show up as ghosts later to encourage mc in a time of great self-struggle.

Syrinx if Fleetfoot. bc all female mc’s need a pet to reveal her Feminine and Soft side

Sandriel and Pollux are Maeve and Cairn. Evil female character with vast power and her torturer? COOKIE CUTTER FORMULA. The scene where Bryce offers herself up for Hunt in the lobby also kinda mirrors that scene in..HoF? QoS? Don’t remember, but pretty sure that happened. Also that scene was so fucking dumb, I really thought Bryce had a Smart Plan, but I was bamboozled once again. 

A gem from my notes: “Bryce is Aelin but with cocaine”

I think the whole demon portal thing is a ripoff of ACOWAR (or is it KoA I can’t even remember), sacrificing yourself to close the rift, etc, etc. 

Anyways, Bryce = Aelin, a party-girl front with a sob backstory that’s her superpower origin story who always has a Plan. 

Hunt = Rowan, broody warrior busy repaying debts getting orders they don’t want while pining over a lost love. They reluctantly let the female mc in and voila they’re in LOVE

The whole “plot twist” that revealed Hunt’s true plan along was so fucking dumb...

It wasn’t a plot twist, it was just plain bad writing

There was no set up at all, nothing alluding to Hunt secretly masterminding an attempted coup with the help of Magic Meth

The whole time I was like “...this is part of their plan right. There’s no way he legit planned this...”

Character’s POVs should reveal what they’re thinking, even if you’re just hinting at something to reveal later...this was just lazy

Another thing that really rubbed me the wrong way was the sudden reveal that Fury and Juniper had been in a relationship the whole time? Despite like above, there was no prior allusion to that?

It felt like half-assed representation at best and completely irrelevant to the story with it coming up again in a throwaway line near the end

Also? I’m fairly certain there was a scene in the beginning where they were all out clubbing and Juniper hooked up with some rando while Fury was also at the club with them? Was this before they got together or did SJM insert this so last minute that no one caught it?

Wtf is sunball. Can someone just help me out here.

Some people have been saying Hunt is Asian coded? Where???!!!!! All I’m seeing is the same stuff she pulled in ACOTAR where all the Illyrians were tan so people could claim they were poc for woke points but not get in trouble for art depicting them as white ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

SJM pls stay away from “like calls to like” you don’t deserve it

[survivor-switzerland]

EPISODE 9: MY LITTLE GREMLINS AND I ARE FLIPPING THE SCRIPT - DOM

Logan went home and I AM SHOOK. I AM SHOOK TO THE CORE!! I thought he could've used his connections with Luke to save himself but looks like the 4 OG Matterhorn are tight as a rope. Right now Tyler could be in danger because I feel like this challenge is in Max's wheelhouse.

Now my tribe is in a dilemma because we all like each other and we have to vote each other out. Thank the sadistic hosts for that. Now hopefully I win this immunity because I need to be absolutely sure I'm going to merge because ain't no way am I gonna be a pre-merge boot!

Well, the plan worked out and Logan left. It sucks and kinda felt like how I'd imagine kicking a puppy would feel like but I think it's for the best that he's gone, although it does suck that he went through all of this to get the same placement a second time.

From here on out, the only person I put my trust is 100% is Zack, then Tyler and then Luke, which is kind of surprising. But Luke seemed kinda sketchy this round with his connection with Logan so I'll be keeping my eye on him.

I'm nervous about this round since both tribes are going to tribal, but hopefully I'll be good no matter what as Matterhorn still has the advantage on the tribe, and Tyler and Max are the minority. The ideal situation is that someone other than Max wins immunity and then we can take them out because I think it's about time that we end the feud between Zack and Max, and that isn't gonna be done by taking out Zack, at least not on my watch!

UGHHH I am so upset. So Logan was voted out and that is a huge blow for not only my game but for Nick and Ashley Sarah's games as well. Now that he's gone, we have to get a majority some other way. The only way we can do that is if we make sure that Ian is on our side so we can blindside Luke, Tyler, Zack, and Abel. My tribe has to stick together and I'm assuming that Max will be voted out of that tribe bc of the friend group. That is kinda good for me though. HOLY CRAP I JSUT CAME UP WITH SOMETHIGN WHILE TYPING THIS. WHAT IF WE BLINDSIDE BEN? COULD YOU IMAGINE THE CHAOS? THIS WOULD BREAK THE ABEL/BEN FRIENDSHIP F2 AND WOULD GIVE US NUMBERS IN CASE BEN FLIPPED ON US AT THE MERGE. y'all this is my story arch or my elimination episode. i'm hoping it's not the latter of the two. anyways. I came into this game wanting to work with Luke. After tonight? I love you luke but you can fucking choke for what you did to logan. logan deserves so much better and now I'm coming for you. I will not stop until you and your alliance is taken out by none other than THE dom from original Monte Rosa. You can kiss my Puerto Rican ass luke. love you as a person tho you're actually super sweet but you pissed me off. anyways good night america and stay shook canada.

Voting Logan out last tribal was so tough because he's one of my best friends and it sucks so bad but like I said in my voting confessional, it was going to happen at some point. Coming into the double tribal, we really need to do our best to make sure that Max doesn't win individual immunity because he's next on the list to go. If he does win immunity? I have no idea what might happen. I called with Tyler and we talked it through and said that we could probably vote for Abel or Zack but to prevent a tie, I might have to use my vote negator to ensure that rocks aren't pulled and one of us goes home. Tyler and I made a pact to go to the end and we plan on doing that but it's gonna be tough. Looking at a potential merge after these two tribal councils, I predict that the two people that leave in the double will because jury members 1 and 2 but I'm not sure. Merge is going to be difficult with there only being 4 original Matterhorn members (3 if Max wins immunity) so Tyler said he'd protect me as best he can but Tyler doesn't know that I'm actually close with some people over there so I should be okay.

Double tribal and someone will be immune from each tribe!!!! I'm so nervous!!! It would be nice to actually win something for a change. These challenges seem to be either not my greatest or I just don't have time like people here seem to.

EPISODE 9

We were all ready for a merge and to be up 8-4, but SURPRISE! It was a double muthafuckin' tribal. Yikes. The good news was that if I were to survive the double-elimination, I would make it to the top 10 and officially surpass my Tumblr Survivor: Myanmar placement.

Logan was bounced from the other tribe and that came as a MAJOR shock because Tyler and Max were (seemingly) brand new to the OG Matterhorn 4 and furthermore, they had a history of working with Logan on the Trent, Daisy, and Lily votes as far as I knew. And Max is lacking in the possessing a personality department, so I really thought they'd all just be bored do death by them and vote them off. Fortunately, Tyler stuck around and I hope that Tyler manages to survive this double tribal as well.

I discussed Logan's elimination with Nick. Tyler warned me how close the two of them (and Dom as well), so I figured I could get some loyalty points from Nick by eulogizing Logan and bemoaning his tragic loss and how detrimental it is to my game and blah blah blah--we had a good talk, Nick's a really cool dude, and I'm going to need him on my side going forward.

This double tribal does not bode well for me. I'm safe. No one is coming after me. But that's because I'm aligned with everyone (without even trying). It's 100% Parvati's "I'm in such a hot pickle!" situation. Ashley and Ian think that I'm with them (and I am). Dom, Nick, and Benjamin think I'm with them (I'm really with just Dom as far as I'm concerned, but that could change). My ultimate goal is to find a way to get rid of either Benjamin or perhaps Ian this round, preferably the former so as not to sketch out Tyler if he survives this round.

I chatted up Dom first and he took the words right out of my mouth--Ian is sketchy, but Benjamin is a major flight risk going forward. Ben resolved to talk to Nick. I offered to talk to Ashley and she could potentially talk to Ian. We both want the same thing. We both want this vote to be unanimous so that there are no apparent cracks going into a merge at 10 with 4 OG Matterhorns still kicking. That's dangerous territory. When one is in the majority, they need that family as happy and carefree as possible. A 4-2 or 3-3 could ruin lives here. No, thank you. Upon talking with Ashley and Ian, they agreed.

The immunity challenge was finding cows. Really, this was going to come down to who had the most free time available to them and who was the most willing to give up that free time. The answer in this case was Ian (but the real story is--Jesus Christ, Zack! Several thousand cows! I feel like you were safe no matter what and you just put that time in to show...how big of a threat you are? I found that strange) and Ian's safety is a best case scenario for me. The two names swirling around the tribe were Ben for potential connections to the other side and Ian for being a wet blanket in terms of strategy.

Let me take this opportunity while discussing Ian to say that he's been a MAJOR disappointment. Early in the game, he was really sweet and genuine and I loved the guy, but the second we had our first tribal council looming, he became this enigma. He suddenly has no opinions. Talking strategy to him has been very difficult because he brings nothing to the table. Part of me figures that this is because Ian doesn't want any information to come back around and bite him in the ass, but I feel like he's going about it wrong. He's coming across to several people on our tribe as very noncommittal and shifty. When I ask him how he feels about the vote or what he thinks our best move is, he talks in riddles and blah statements and not only is it boring, it's not helpful at all. It's like I'm talking to a dog. I feel like I'm addressing him with clarity and all he hears "Blah Blah Blah, Ginger." Honestly, if Ian hadn't won immunity, I'd have been very tempted to get rid of him this round.

Ian's immunity put Dom and I in a clear driver's seat with Ben's elimination in our sights. We were fine. Ashley was fine. Ian was Ian (but will go along with Ashley and me). Ben thinks everything's hunky dory and Ashley is our only option and such--cool, cool, cool. Then there was Nick. And Dom was telling me Nick is on board because I'm on board, but Nick seemed VERY apprehensive when I spoke to him. Nick clearly wants to vote off Ashley, but is having difficulty with pulling the trigger because he knows voting off Benjamin is best for his game. The whole exchange between Nick and I was so weird because he and Dom were both telling me different things about Nick's perspective at the same time. It was terrifyingly unsettling.

And then I fuck up. Dom & Ben are similar names to me insofar as they're one syllable and three letters and in conversations with both Nick and Dom, I said "Yeah we're all set to vote for Dom" or something like that when I definitely meant "Ben." Oh my God! Such a terrible lapse in language. This is why one shouldn't drink and scheme. The names all start to get loose. Fortunately, I think Nick and Dom believed me (it's the truth, I swear), but holy shit if I were to get voted off just because I did the whole "I Ross take thee Rachel--Emily!" thing. I'm the worst.

New future plan--find some way to eliminate both Ian and Nick while keeping the sane ones, Ashley and Dom happy. Let's make that happen, okay?

So Zack wins individual immunity... *inserts Katya rolling her eyes losing to Alaska in a lip sync for the second time.gif*

Wow! I won immunity so I'm guaranteed F10 wohoo! Honestly if I stayed home yesterday instead of going to the mall I may have even reached the 2k mark alongside Zack. But nah I wasn't gonna waste my last few days of summer vacation finding some damn cow. As Bart Simpson said "Don't have a cow man."

Damn Tyler came in second now I'm so worried for him. This double tribal council guarantees 2 OG Monte Rosa going because over here on Matterhorn we're all OG Monte Rosa and on Monte Rosa the 4 OG Matterhorn will obviously stick together.

Now hosts, you know I love all you and all but for this round I hate you all because we all like each other on our tribe and we have to vote someone out. :( Ugh, can we just all eat some nightlock berries and rebel against these evil hosts.

So far according to Nick, Ben and Ashley's name has been thrown and I'm not gonna let Ashley go, not on my watch! The H4rmony alliance must survive this tribal and my tribe needs to have a united vote so no one is alienated and flips on us.

hiiii!!!! long time no talk!! idek where to begin tbh. so i had like 2 tribals off bc my tribe won immunity?? i was shook bc that was a new feeling in this game to like.. have off and just relax and not worry! but last night, we had a tribal! and logan? went home. that's exactly what i wanted. lemme explain.

i told logan i want max out. (i mean.. i do but i'm not dumb enough to let logan get further then he has already.) so i told logan i'd vote with him, which i did. but i made sure i still had the votes to get logan out. i can't have logan, nick & dom make merge together. i jusy can't, they would be untouchable. but i want logan to think i had nothing to do with his blindside because come merge, i don't want nick & dom coming after me for plotting logan's demise. and it worked. logan believes that i had nothing to do woth his blindside and that it was all luke. so sorry luke, but dom & nick can come after you while i sit back and enjoy my motherfuckin sprite.

SO! this week both tribes are going to tribal. i won immunity so i'm good. (btw my score... i really fucking found over 2,000 cows...) but i want and need max gone now. son of a bitch voted against me last tribal and it openly plotting against me and i don't need someone like that in the merge. so, if i get what i want like usual, max will go. todaloo hoe!

Okay so I hope this vote goes smoothly. Ben thinks that the vote is for Ashley tonight. Little does he know, my little gremlins and I are flipping the script. or so i thought until brett fucked up by saying my name instead of ben's. im still kinda confused as to why that happened but oh well. i love ben so much but like he's going to win the game if no one takes him out lmao. voting ben out is going to screw us all over when we merge though. the other tribe's friend group is like so close with ben (unless abel is voted out tonight idk i could be reading the other tribe completely wrong) I'm hoping that either Luke, Zack, Jev, or Abel go home tonight because we need numbers going into the merge. Ben is too scary to keep around because of the fact that he'd flip to Abel's side. We need to get Abel out as soon as possible because he literally has a winner's edit. He's gone to 7 tribals and has gotten votes at most of them. He needs to go as soon as possible so someone else has a shot at winning.

Lmao Zack found like 2000 cows fucking loser

I'm so nervous, we've all put votes on Max but now I'm scared in case he pulls out an idol and he's the sole vote for me and I leave. He can't vote Zack, so I'm probably next best.

I either beat my previous placement tonight or I do worse than I did last time around, so there's a lot at stake for me personally.