#just to screw over trans women
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emeraldspiral · 2 years ago
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TLDR, voting selfishly for policy that only makes things better for you while actively making things worse for other people ultimately leads to everyone being worse off.
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andromachos · 5 months ago
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denying a trans man gender afirming surgeries and trying to legally make him incapable of having decision over his own body, is transphobic, undoubtly, but the legislation exists to control cis women. the societal expectation of fertility and searching all the posible means to have control over the womb and vagina of another person is both fundamentally racist and ableist in nature, as ranging from liberals to full on conservatives, will see people they oppress getting forcibly castrated and relish in the thought of them having "no legacy"
' irreversible damage ' was written about trans men, but we should not forget, from cover to the author's intention, that it's expressing the fear of losing women's fertility and societal indoctrination of baby makers. this is because, to the misogynistic mind, the idea of gender non-conformity presents the idea of questioning gender roles, which between many things not only proposes a woman that does not live for men, but also a woman that can find fulfilment without birthing kids through pregnancy. for these reasons self proclaimed "radicals" venerate the divine feminity and conservative groomers defend their right to refuse to teach girls about anything other than how to carry a pregnancy. it is the fear of losing the conditioned woman who is submissive to patriarchy, and the hipocrisy of considering race, class and disabilities despite claiming to be "pro-life"
trans liberation will come with women's liberation and viceversa, as they both encourage body autonomy and the concept of the woman happy with her existence without serving men. we should not think one cannot advance without the other, as transmisogyny shows us how deeply settled the standards of cis womanhood are, even within cis women themselves, when needed to shame women into conformity and submission and the shame of failing to be molded "correctly"
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autolenaphilia · 8 days ago
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God, this is so weak. Sarah McBride just caving immediately to Republican transmisogyny with this bathroom law. Like we knew she was pro-Israel, but that didn't surprise me, most democrats elected to congress are, but i expected her at least to defend her own human dignity. Like, to paraphrase The Big Lebowski, "I mean, say what you want about the tenets of zionism, at least it's an ethos.", this is just spineless cowardice.
To be fair, I doubt this was entirely McBride's decision, i'm sure she spoke with the Democratic Party bigwigs and got told to just cave, because they wouldn't back her in resisting this. But that just further implicates the Democratic Party.
Like someone with a backbone would see this as an opportunity to do some civil disobedience and disobey this rule. Make a statement, resist. But, no, the Democratic Party is so tied to law and order that they see no room for even peaceful civil disobedience.
At least not in the case of trans women's rights. The Democratic Party elite already has been talking this past november that the reason Harris lost the election was because she wasn't transphobic enough. So the democrats might have decided to just let this outrage slide in the hopes of getting more votes.
Violating transmisogynistic bathroom laws is something ordinary trans women do everyday to survive, entirely without the privileges Sarah Mcbride has as a congresswoman.
In fact, that's exactly the women she is screwing over by not using that privilege to fight. As quoted in Erin Reed's article linked above: "Transgender advocate and Harvard Clinical Instructor Alejandra Caraballo emphasized the broader implications: “This isn't just about her. These rules apply to trans staffers and interns who do not have the protections and privilege that she has.”
Women who unlike Mcbride, don't have a private toilet connected to their office to use (every congressperson has their own office with its own toilet).
And as Erin Reed quotes in her article:
"Ash Orr, a transgender organizer in West Virginia, was equally critical: “Rep. McBride’s messaging essentially suggests that if a federal ban is enacted, trans people should simply comply. While I understand the difficult position she is in, she holds a position of immense power and privilege. She should be using that power to defend and protect her community, not falling in line. Trans lives are at stake.”
Clearly the #resistance against the coming second Trump adminstration is off to a great start /s
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banj0possum · 9 months ago
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Yans (Or Yan(s) of your choice) reacting to discovering their darling is secretly a femboyysuhshbhbw s sbshshs a... ddhsja.. dkdjoa. .. .a .a... a.. (I was executed for my crimes)
Darling is a Femboy?!
All my OCs x Femboy! Reader
Note: Femboy meaning “feminine presenting boy” not an insult to trans women guys!! I promise i love you guys!!
CW: Weirdo behaviour from some of them!!, Reader is called feminine terms, Male Reader, a few nsfw themes (implied or minor)
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Secretly likes it : Adrian, Bo, Jasper, Victor, Baron, Wolfie, Axel
Doesn't show it much but he absolutely loves the way you look! So soft and feminine and cute, he fantasizes about you a lot because of it. Those clothes whether it's big or tight on you, it turns him on so much!! He loves letting you borrow his clothes that are always way larger than you and seeing your legs or midriff peek through. He'll steal your clothes once in a while and just take big whiffs of it and imagine your soft squishy thighs wrapped around his body while he hugs you close. As much as he want to feel it for himself, he'd rather let you initiate the intimate action first
🖤 Adrian makes fun of you for it. I mean you're so girly! You probably comb your hair with a dumb brush like a barbie or something? Do you use strawberry scented shampoo too you sissy? hahah...no seriously what do you use you smell so good. A-and whats with the clothes huh? You trying to like seduce him or something lol because its working
💀 You make him weak in the knees!! Bo has a habit of showing off his strength to both you and the horde, but with you all dressed up for him, he makes sure to flex and stand up straighter more often. Please praise him!! Tell him how strong and handsome he is!! He's too shy proud to beg but oh my god if you do it on you own accord he's gonna melt.
🥀 Fantasizes the most. Jasper has a diary that he'd rather die than show you thats full of entries all about you, how much he'd want to hold your soft hands, have you on his lap with your legs wrapped around you so he can have his hands on your precious thighs, or better yet he'd be inbetween them as you squeeze hard in your prettiest thigh highs- I mean what i me-
🌙 Think's about you drinking someone's blood in a beautiful black dress full of bows and lace. You'd look absolutely adorable all dolled up and covered in blood! Victor's salivating just thinking about it~! But of course he'd never tell it to the others, they'd make fun of him until sunrise or perhaps stal his own personal fantasy from him!
♠️ Steals your clothes the most. Any clothing item that's gone in the laundry's gotta go through Baron first, for security purposes of course! He's gotta make sure there aren't any trackers or bugs in there! also gotta take a quick whiff of it to make sure no one sprayed some kind of toxin or poison on you hahah...god you smell so sweet...
🍂 Why must you be so adorable!??? Wolfie can't help but want to cover you in all the soft hides and blankets he has in the den. He loves crawling under your oversized hoodie to give you kisses and licks while feeling your small warm body <3
🎸 Axel thinks you're the cutest/hottest thing to ever exist. He's the type to swoon over every single thing you do. Seeing you drink a pink berry smoothie makes him all red, Catching you readjusting your clothes and seeing a bit of your body is taking him to the ER from a bleeding nose. He'd never force you to dress in a certain way but oh my god imagine you in a baby rock outfit, all dressed up in punk clothing yet full of ruffles and bows and everything AAA!! He's a sucker for seeing you do the most metal stuff while dressed in soft pastel clothing.
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So cute!! : Brandon, Screw, Soda, Kalva, Silas, Caspian, Ashvan
Absolutely adores you!! He swoons, gushes, coos over how cute you are to whoever entertains the thought. If they find anything they think you'd like, doesn't matter how expensive it is, he wants to make you happy! Perhaps you'd reward him with a kiss? He's gotta buy this asap!!
🏈 Brandon's actually beggging the cheerleading squad to let you join please pleasee!! He wants to see you cheer him on during games!! He'd be practically drooling over you, even more if he'd think about how you'd look in a short cheerleading skirt and..no stockings~..hopefully he can buy a cheerleading outfit for you even if you're not in the squad..
💀 Screw and Soda both melt whenever you're around. They both love physical touch so they find a lot of comfort cuddling and nuzzling into you. That comfort is multiplied by 100 with you dressed up all cute and pretty. They love it when you wear your shorts. They drag you over to the bed so one of them can cuddle you with your legs on their shoulders and the other hugging you from behind.
🪶 Lovely lovely lovely!! You're so lovely!! It's like how males use bright colors to attract a mate. Your adorable pastel colors or fluffy soft clothes make you irresistible to Kalva! He loves it more when you wear clothes that show skin, it lets him feel his mate easier! You're so soft and smooth and aaaa so so small and cute! He's able to scoop you up and pull you close with his wings. No need for all that covering! Your mate will keep you warm! It's his excuse for wanting to bury his face in your chest
🌙 Silas loves you no matter what you want or wear, but of course whatever you choose to take interest in, it'll affect Silas greatly. With you being a femboy for instance, he becomes much softer towards you, always cooing or holding you close like a fragile doll. Whatever praises you want to hear, he'll say it. You want to be pretty? Well then you're the prettiest, most precious boy he's ever seen, no mortal can ever be as pretty as you my darling little turtledove~!
🌊 Literally no one will ever be as pretty as Caspian but OH MY GOD YOU'RE ADORABLE!!! He offers, no, BEGS to pamper you as much as he pamper's himself. Let him brush your hair, let him give you soft massages when your pretty little body gets tired at night, let him dress you up in the finest dresses Atlantis has to offer!! They're a little wet but they'd look adorable on you in the water!
🌾 Ashvan's so protective over you! It's no surprise that he'd have such a reaction to the way you look. There's no way you can protect yourself! You need a big strong protector like him! Sure you mowed down a whole horde of goblins on your own during a mission but he saw you trip and scrape your knee! So unsafe! He has to be there to make sure you're ok! You might see him linger around watching you. If you ever approach him to thank him with a little kiss to the nose, he's probably fainting on the spot.
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Encourages it : Valeth, Ribs, Dorik, Garrick, Hallow, Kagiri, Alistair
He spoils you to death! In fact, he might be the reason why your closet is filled to the brim with pretty clothes in the first place. He has a habit of doting over you because of it. It pushes his possessiveness and obsession through the roof! You have a lot of power over him that may or may not backfire. There's no limits to what he'll do for his pretty little boy..or what he'll do to you~..
⚔️ Valeth babys you every chance he gets. He might be a brutish orc, but he loves being gentle with you. He'll be the one to give you relaxing bubble baths, dress you up in the softest clothing, and feed you, all with the gentlest touch you've ever felt in your life. It does have its drawbacks however. He won't trust you in doing any kind of hard work. Why do that when you got your big strong man to do it for you? All you need to do is sit and be pretty for him~ Just like that little duckling~
💀 Ribs is literally shaking over it why do you look so so so s- AAA please sit on his lap sit on his lap please hes begging youo!! If you try to leave the bed while he's having a cuddle session with you, he's dragging you back, your nails scratching the floor and everything. He's a little bit insane about you ngl, the sight of you in a soft, oversized hoodie with your thighs squished together put his brain into overdrive. He unconsciously humps/rubs against you while you two hug, it's your choice whether you let him absolutely devour you or not~
🔥 Oh oh my god oh my god oh my- Dorik's begging, on his hands and knees, to get a taste of you!! Doesn't matter if it's a kiss or a lick or something more, he just wants a chance at tasting his sweet little master~! Are you all dressed up just for him? Is he getting a reward?? Oh please please say yes!! He's drooling buckets over the thought of touching you, just letting his hands wander all over your petite body, going under the snug fabrics that hug your figure oh so deliciously~ He'll burn any and every clothing item that isn't a crop top, thigh high, shorts or hoodie! All he wants is to love love love his pretty master!!
🌙 Garrick spoils you so much the others have to scold him for it. But what can he say? You're his little pookie bear honeypie babyboo loveydove- I'll shut up now. But srsly this man is FOUL!! He shares with you his fantasies of sinking his teeth in a pretty little lamb like you, so soft and warm~! He makes you shiver everytime he pulls away the cute dress he's bought for you just to lick at your skin and ghost his fangs over it. He loves seeing his little lamb squirm~!
🦋 Hallow's dressing you up in the prettiest of dresses and outfits!! Like a proper princess! He more or less treats you like a little doll. He's a lot like Valeth but you have a bit more freedom with him, he's just a little whiny and clingy. He loves gifting you cute clothes and accessories like cute skirts and bows and everything, but he also expects something in return~ A long cuddle session perhaps? Or a day of lying on your lap while you hum lullabies to him~? Ohhhh he just can't wait!!
🐉 Kagiri and his gang are gonna buy you the nicest clothes ever!! Well not really.. They look more like stuff a mafia boss' wife would wear like slim black dresses, fluffy scarves and stylish coats and blazers. Honestly you look amazing in anything to them! Whether it be a chiq dress you'd find in an expensive clothing store or an adorable poofy nightgown, they'll bombard you with compliments. They get a little loud whenever they talk about dressing you up in different outfits. They got a lot of warnings for talking about your thighs and chest so loudly.
👑Alistair objectifies you. Calls you his cute little doll, his plaything, his his his! You serve no purpose other than being pretty for him and only him. He expects you to be in the cutest of clothes (that he chooses for you of course) at all times, especially after any meetings or work he had to endure. He wants you ready to give him the softest of cuddles to help him recharge from a harrowing day of being away from you. Oh and yes, you must bathe with him if ever he asks. Your skin must be maintained to be smooth and soft! He'll take that job of gently cleaning your petite little body for you (yes yes no need to thank him) and yeah, the bath is rose scented.
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genderqueerdykes · 14 days ago
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sorry to bother you about the "male lesbian" post that said people assume they're always cis... I just want to raise you how many even subconsciously see trans mascs as "escaping" being a woman. how they now have power and privilege, and being a woman was so terrible
they hear "i'm a trans man but consider my attraction to women sapphic" and say "but your entire thing was to not be a woman! you can't do this!"
i've never liked the sentiment that all trans men are "escaping" womanhood. it's so vile. of course some trans men never want anything to do with womanhood and they are absolutely allowed to. but most trans men aren't necessarily transitioning to "escape' womanhood, they're doing it to become a man. those are independent situations from one another. some trans men do feel tortured as women and desperately need to shed that label. some do not
and it does really suck when people just assume trans men instantly gain power and privilege in society just because they came out. most trans men never receive any kinds of social benefits from being men- they are not treated better by medical professionals, they do not receive better wages, they do not receive more hours or benefits at work, they often are fired before they're able to hold any kind of position of power in a company... not to mention how people treat pregnant trans men. even if trans men pass as cis theres always something waiting around the corner to screw them over. a medical professional or cop seeing an F marker on a license could be life or death in a lot of cases. a lot of doctors just don't fucking care about trans men with F markers and will become actively hostile when they see that, or a "feminine" name.
very, very few trans men benefit from patriarchy. it's not an instant thing you magically gain the second you come out or realize you're a man.
and yes it's so ugly to have people respond to a sapphic or lesbian trans man with "i thought you didn't want to be a woman!" or like you said, "escaping" womanhood. people just sort of instantly pull that card instead of taking the time to ask that person what they meant. instead they just make a bunch of assumptions. that's the problem here in general is that people literally make an assumption about what male lesbian means and then refuse to ask the person what they meant by it. it's rude dumbass behavior
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drdemonprince · 4 months ago
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So, I (a trans guy) am kind of coming to terms with the fact that I might be more gay than bisexual after all. Where I live, the queer community is split pretty definitively between the "women, non binary and trans people" (or FLINTA*, if you're familiar with that horrible term) and the gay male community. While I have lots of problems with the former, it is kind of the community I am in, mostly because it has felt safe during my transition. It still feels safe, but not really comfortable. I want to feel like I am part of the gay male community, especially if I mostly want to date queer men in the future.
I am like, so scared of existing in any gay male spaces. When I tried being in them pre T, I felt like an imposter. When I travelled to the US a few years ago, the only place my then partner (also on T) and me were misgendered consistently was in gay bars (in a lot of famous "gay friendly" cities). All of this has left me with a sense of humiliation and not-belonging that gets reactivated every time I even think of stepping into one again, even if I am fairly certain I would not get this reaction now.
How do I get past the shame that is attached to my previous experiences and learn to actually enjoy myself there?
So, I believe that you have the order of operations wrong here. You don't get past shame and then go out to these gay spaces -- you go out to those gay spaces and then overcome (some) of your shame. And that shame may live with you forever in some form. You can still have a worthwhile life with it.
Go to the gay bars. There are many different kinds of them, all with wildly different energies and clientelle, and it is normal and boring and blase for trans guys to be at each and every single one of them.
One way that many newbies unwittingly screw up is by going to the most circuity, dance-y kinds of gay bars that tend to be filled with young, thin, rich, superficial people -- and then they mistake the meanness of that crowd for the meanness of all gays, or interpret the meanness as a sign they are not accepted by "the gay male community."
There is no singular gay male community. There are in fact a wide variety of subcultures with their own beauty standards, stylistic choices, interests, and norms. And there's a lot of cliquishness and mean girl behavior among people who have decided they are high rank in any particular small subculture, don't get me wrong. But you don't have to believe in any of it. They're just coping with their own history of marginalization and rejection by trying to become a new ruling class within their own tiny pond. You can laugh it off as the work of kind of sad, small thinking and just enjoy yourself and talk to people who are not assholes.
So, go to the leather bar. Go to a pup night. Go to an old-timers bar filled with gays over 60 (they will be nice to you and buy you drinks, I promise). Go to a gay bar that's casual and nerdy, with arcade machines and pub trivia. Go to a drag bar on a weekday night and meet some of the newer queens who are still trying to find their chops. And yes, go to the DJ sets and dance clubs all you like, but don't let what a few snatched bitchy 22-year-olds (or insecure former twink 42 year old real estate agents) get you feeling insecure. They're doing that shit because they are insecure.
Bring a friend. Talk to someone who seems nervous and alone on the side of the dance floor, too. Wear an outfit that will get some compliments. Nurse a drink at the bar and trawl grindr to see if anyone seems worth talking to. Join a dungeon or a gay running group. Attend a gay men's support group at your local lgbt center. Meet a ton of people and just get yourself out there, and quickly you will realize that your mind has wildly over dramatized how much you stand out or how much anybody cares.
Fat gays, disabled gays, older gays, Autistic gays, nerdy gays, poor gays, Black and brown gays, immigrant gays, they all feel like they do not belong and are not welcome too. Find them and be kind to them and hold onto them. Notice who is nice and warm with you, but also don't read into it too much if some people are just neutral. Eventually you will figure out what you like doing, which spaces you enjoy inhabiting, and who you want to be there with -- and then you'll have some fun.
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sarafangirlart · 2 months ago
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Did Kaos even explain why the three humans “destined to destroy Zeus/the Gods” are specifically Eurydice, Caeneus and Ariadne? Because if they really wanted a “we hate the gods” story shouldn’t the chosen three be. severely wronged or abandoned by the gods / the fates?
Like Oedipus? Lamia? Cassandra? Daphne? Arachne? Callisto? Hell I’d even watch a smackdown of Clytemnestra vs Artemis or Menelaus and Helen vs Aphrodite any time then watch a whole other boring show following the same bad story tropes.
They don’t really explain it no, but I was so eager for it to be over I likely missed it, this show seems surprising hesitant to show the more gruesome side of mythology, if they adapted the story that Caeneus was raped by Poseidon and they show how angry and miserable he is about it I would’ve totally been on board, tho someone mentioned that considering the current social environment is especially hostile towards trans ppl nowadays, having someone transition after assault could be bad “pr” so to speak, tho I don’t think we should bend a knee to transphobes/terfs and make representation that’s more palatable and presentable, human experience is messy and we shouldn’t shy away from that in an attempt to make bigots less hostile towards minorities bc they will always be hostile.
If they show Eurydice being angry about Aristaeus not facing any consequences for trying to assault her I’d understand that too mythology Eurydice has zero beef with Hera, but she could feel resentment towards Aristaeus and by extension Apollo (since he’d likely defend his son), gods rarely face consequences for assaulting mortals, Euripides’s Ion tackles that subject way better than all of these “Gods bad” modern retelling (tho I wish Creusa didn’t forgive Apollo bc that mf didn’t even have the balls to show his face).
Instead of Ariadne, who usually gets a happy ending and becomes a goddess herself, how about going with Apemosyne? Another Cretan princess. Her story is extremely depressing, she’s screwed over by a god and her own family, considering that half the show takes place in the underworld she’d fit right in. Considering she’ll be “coworkers” with Hermes it would especially suck for her. But considering that Dionysus is made to be one of the “good ones” even tho in mythology he brainwashed women into slaughtering their families, they’d probably portray Hermes as such too, since he’s usually simply the comic relief in adaptations anyway.
That’s another thing, they water down the gods who are supposed to be good guys and make the “bad guy” worse, in this version Hades never kidnapped Persephone that’s just propaganda in universe. The Fates and Furies are goddesses but in this show they’re against the gods bc of that meander water thing? Don’t they drink it too?
I think they realized that their hesitancy means that they won’t be showing us bad things the gods actually did and so they make up random bullshit like Hera owning tongueless priestesses and Zeus killing a kitten. Cassandra is in the show but she’s more of an exposition machine tho it’s hinted she’ll play a bigger role in season 2, but why couldn’t she be one of the three humans destined to destroy Zeus? Why aren’t any of the Trojans destined to destroy Zeus? Why do they have to be saved by Greeks? Sure Zeus in mythology had a soft spot for them but he still planned the destruction of their city (could be a decent metaphor for an abuser who says that they love their victim while still abusing them imo) but Kaos Zeus doesn’t have that goodwill towards the Trojans so why not have them rightfully take him down? In the final episode Andromache and Ariadne team up and agree to fight against Olympus, tho that reminds me of Acrisius in the Clash of the Titans remake being more of a dumb dumb than he is in the myths and started a war against Mount Olympus only to unsurprisingly fail.
I really dislike how the Trojans are portrayed in the show, clearly they are supposed to be allegory for modern middle eastern refugees in Europe yet all the main Trojan characters are played by white actors. They have such a racially diverse cast but they seem uninterested in actually representing the diversity of the Mediterranean and mythology as a whole.
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commsroom · 1 year ago
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as an extension of how hera reads as trans to me, hera/eiffel resonates with me specifically as a relationship between a trans woman and a cis man. loving hera requires eiffel to decentralize his own perspective in a way that ties into both his overall character arc and the themes of the show.
pop culture is baked into the dna of wolf 359, into eiffel’s worldview, and in how it builds off of a sci-fi savvy audience’s assumptions: common character types, plot beats, or dynamics, why would a real person behave this way? how would a real person react to that? eiffel is the “everyman” who assumes himself to be the default. hera is the “AI who is more human than a lot of humans,” but it doesn’t feel patronizing because it isn’t a learned or moral quality; she is a fundamentally human person who is routinely dehumanized and internalizes that.
eiffel/hera as a romance is compelling to me because there is a narrative precedent for some guy/AI or robot woman relationships in a way i think mirrors some attitudes about trans women: it’s a male power fantasy about a subclass of women, or it’s a cautionary tale, or it’s a deconstruction of a power fantasy that criticizes the way men treat women as subservient, as property. but what does that pop culture landscape mean in the context of desire? If you are a regular person, attracted to a regular person, who really does care for you and wants to do right by you, but is deeply saturated in these expectations? how do you navigate that?
I think that, in itself, is an aspect of communication worth exploring. sometimes you won’t get it. sometimes you can’t. and that’s not irreconcilable, either. it’s something wolf 359 is keenly aware of, and, crucially, always sides with hera on. eiffel screws up. he says insensitive things without meaning to. often, hera will call him out on it, and he will defer to her. in the one case where he notably doesn’t, the show calls attention to it and makes him reflect. it’s not a coincidence that the opening of shut up and listen has eiffel being particularly dismissive of hera - the microaggression of separating her from “men and women” and the insistence on using his preferred title over hers. there are things eiffel has just never considered before, and caring for hera the way he does means he has to consider them. he's never met someone like hera, but media has given him a lot of preconceptions about what people like her might be like.
there’s a whole other discussion to be had about the gender dynamics of wolf 359, even in the ways the show tries to avoid directly addressing them, and how sexual autonomy in particular can’t fully be disentangled from explorations of AI women. i don’t think eiffel fully recognizes what comments like “wind-up girl” imply, and the show is not prepared to reconcile with it, but it’s interesting to me. in the context of transness (and also considering hera’s disability, two things i think need to be discussed together), i think it’s worth discussing how hera’s self image is at odds with the way people perceive her, her disconnect from physicality, how she can’t be touched by conventional means, and the ways in which eiffel and hera manage to bridge that gap.
even the desire for embodiment, and the autonomy and type of intimacy that comes with it, means something different when it’s something she has to fight for, to acquire, to become accustomed to, rather than a circumstance of her birth. i suppose the reason i don’t care for half measures in discussions re: hera and embodiment is also because, to me, it is in many ways symbolically a discussion about medical transition, and the social fear of what’s “lost” in transition, whether or not those things were even desired in the first place.
hera’s relationship with eiffel is unquestionably the most supportive and equal one she has, but there are still privileges, freedoms, and abilities he has that she doesn’t, and he forgets that sometimes. he will never share her experiences, but he can choose to defer to her, to unlearn his pop culture biases and instead recognize the real person in front of him, and to use his own privilege as a shield to advocate for her. the point, to me - what’s meaningful about it - is that love isn’t about inherent understanding, it’s about willingness to listen, and to communicate. and that’s very much at the heart of the show.
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tirfpikachu · 22 days ago
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Oh we're doing radbrl hot takes? Gladly. I've been lurking on here for 5 years and I've things to say.
Sex dysphoria can be innate. It's rare and the ROGD is bullshit, but sex dysphoria is as real as other mental illnesses. We have Body Integrity Identity Disorder cases to prove that.
It's good to share more awareness to possible consequences and realistic outcomes of GRS + to the fact that it is a dangerous, experimental surgery that may not provide relief. But if you're arguing for banning it altogether you're insane. People have the right to bodily autonomy 100% of the time which includes the right to do dangerous and dumb shit to themselves. If you advocate for banning trans surgeries might as well sign your rights to tubal ligations away because they rely on the same fucking principle.
While we're on that topic you people treat detrans people like shit 90% of the time and only pretend to be normal about them to win detrans people over. Pick one. Also you refer to detrans peoples' surgeries with whichever term the person discussed uses. If they say it's mutilation, it's mutilation. If they say it helped, then it helped. Idgaf.
If I see one more radbrl account fakeclaiming autism (+ others) when it's a well-known factor women are underdiagnosed with it in ASTRONOMICAL NUMBERS I'm going to fucking snap. "But autistic men"- autistic men aren't on tumbrl or tiktok they're on Reddit. Next.
R-word usage. Spesks for itself.
Personality disordes (BPD, NPD, whatever) aren't "just hysteria". In a way that I believe they are because they're poorly named, understudied, disregarded and weaponised by psych industry. These diagnosed have been turned into a target on women's back it's true. And they're almost entirely truama-based. However people with these diagnosed do experience a specific set of issues and symptoms that can't be showed into CPTSD alone. Nuance. We're finally approaching the moment where we can give a name to (usually female-specific) responses to the extreme trauma caused by psychiatry and y'all aren't helping by saying it's fake.
Radbrl is rampatly pro-psych when you'd think they'd be against it and examined women's history with it. Any reasonable radical feminist should be at least psych-critical, end of.
Not done yet! 8) Q+ movement has completely screwed over actual asexual people in every way possible. But actual asexuality (what q+ would define as "aroace") is natural and normal. It's a way for nature to regulate population just like gay and bi sexualities are. Radbrl is both arguing that asexuality is inherently trauma based is just wrong and also borrowing conversion therapy rhetorics lol. 9) You can criticise annoying "ace" people all you want and they are partially responsible for LGB struggles right now but at the end of the day they're just teens on the Internet you're attacking for being traumatised and also even if it is trauma... So then what? They're obligated to recover from that now? How come? Towards which purpose? How would you personally benefit from their healing and that they have sex now? Most likely with men while being women? That what you want? Trauma recovery can be re-traumatising yk. Why'd you wish that on anyone. 10) Women abroad (especially woc) don't have radical feminsm (except maybe 4b which is more based on our rhetorics), they have normal feminism that hasn't been divided into lib and rad because rad is closer to the general feminism that the circus that libfem is. But you still use them as pawns lol. 11) Huge ableism problem, huge racism problem, huge intersexism problem as well. Not intersex so won't speak on that but oh god you're no better than TRAs sometimes. 12) American centrism despite claiming otherwise. 13) Radbrl is Not Immune to Russian Propaganda and can't understand ethnic dynamics in europe en-masse (ref to that one Ukraine poll where a russian radfem was more self-aware than everyone else. Embarrassing eh?) 14) The banwaves took most of the good ones and many TEHM voices that were important for us so now Radbrl is a pathetic shadow of what it used to be debate-wise and takes-wise. Most of discourse now is just regurgitating the same arguments. I haven't read something eye-opening or refreshing in a long while which is why I left. This isn't everything yet but I think others have already said other things I wanted to mention. Maybe I'll pop in later with part3
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transpanda-1 · 2 months ago
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🀄We're really upset right now because Planned Parenthood forcefully lowered our estrogen medication both against our consent, without telling us, and going against the idea of switching to patches
To any trans women with diabetic issues, how do you take HRT?
We're just scared that getting diabetes because of covid is going to screw us over even more for life. That we're not even going to be able to transition anymore. They made it sound like it was a real health danger to go by. :( - Dragon
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boreal-sea · 2 years ago
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all this just makes me realize how much the MRA movement screwed us over. so many people trying to have genuine conversations about mens' issues and the struggles they face get called MRA or accused of being misandrists when neither of those things was happening. I understand people being wary of conversations about mens' issues being used to silence women and discussions of misogyny, but that's not everyone, and that kind of generalization feels unproductive. There needs to be nuance and people need to actually take the time to understand what's being said without leaping to accusations of misandry every time someone wants to have a conversation about men, but I don't know if that'll ever actually happen.
I honestly place the blame entirely on anti-transmasc people. They know what they're doing, and they're doing it on purpose to silence us.
Like, we all KNOW the MRA/incel movement is made up of cis men who think cis women oppress them because they won't fuck them. That's it, that's the core of their belief system. That cis women are actually the oppressors, and cis men are actually the oppressed.
That is in no way comparable to trans men saying "we face transphobia".
You cannot logically translate "trans men face transphobia" into "we think trans women oppress trans men".
"Trans men face transphobia" has nothing to do with trans women, first of all. Secondly, it has nothing to do with who will or will not have sex with us. Thirdly, it has nothing to do with whether or not trans women specifically will have sex with us, which is what it would have to be about for there to be any kind of a comparison to MRA rhetoric.
But that's what anti-transmasc people have done. For whatever reason, they've taken the reasoning of the MRAs and tacked it onto trans men. They have invented this problem and then gotten mad at it all by themselves.
And on top of that!! We're not silencing anyone!
We're not going into posts about transmisogyny and derailing them to try to make them about trans men. We're not invading discussions being led by trans women. We're literally trying to create our own space where we can speak, and everyone else is barging in and telling us to shut up.
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uboat53 · 23 days ago
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In light of the election, a word to those who voted for Trump.
I'll admit, I've run out of sympathy. It's been eight years of him being overwhelmingly in the public limelight and he was president for four of those. You all know who he is now and you still voted for him.
And I get it, you'll claim that you voted for him for "the economy" and that you don't support all of the ways in which he's a terrible human being, but I have a hard time believing that considering that the average Trump voter doesn't actually even know what Trump's economic policy will be. Look, America had a decent economy under Trump the first time, not because of anything he did, but because he inherited a decent economy from Obama and spent all his time doing petty things like the Muslim ban rather than screwing up the economy. Don't believe me? Find any graph you like of the US economy and show me where his policies changed anything dramatically from the pre-Trump trend (at least, before he completely screwed up the pandemic).
And, look, if he'd just been promising vague, back to normal-type things, I might believe you that it was the economy, but he hasn't. Since the start of his campaign he's been promising to implement massive tariffs on all imports; something he can do, by the way, without Congressional approval. Tariff, by the way, is another word for tax; he's going to add a 10% (and more!) tax to every single thing that the US imports, and we import a lot. Inflation, by the way, has been back down to reasonable levels for months, this is the type of thing that would cause it to spike back up again.
So, yeah, I don't believe you that you voted for him because you were very concerned about the economy; if you were very concerned about the economy you would know all of that already. No, you didn't vote for him "in spite of" the racism and the lawbreaking and the bigotry, you voted for him because of it. The economy was just a fig leaf.
And if that strikes you the wrong way, if you think I'm wrong about that, if you think I'm judging you in bad faith, sit for a minute with that feeling. Ask yourself, why did you vote for a racist? Why did you vote for a criminal? Because you did. Whatever reason you tell yourself you did it for, you still did it. And millions of people around the country and around the world are going to suffer for it.
And, if the economy, as just about every economist predicts, crashes under the weight of Trump's tariffs and other terrible economic polices, I'll admit that my reaction to your shock will probably not be what you'd like either. As I said, I'm out of sympathy after eight years. You voted for a criminal and a bigot in exchange for a "good economy" and the most likely result is that you will still not get it.
I hope that all of the women who will die because they're unable to access abortion care find peace and that their families will too. I hope that all of the immigrants who are deported and the communities they're ripped from are able to heal. I hope that all the gay and trans people who will be attacked and denied support by their own government find what help they need. I hope that all of the Jews and ethnic minorities who are murdered all over the country by white supremacists emboldened by Trump are able to find peace as well. I hope that all of these people are able to survive the economic shockwaves that are coming.
As for you, I'll admit, as unsympathetic as I am generally, I still have my humanity and that leaves me with at least a small bit of hope for you. I hope that you one day discover the humanity to, even if your assumptions about the economy were somehow correct, risk a little bit of what you have to prevent the suffering of others. I hope that you aren't one of the many people devastated by the economic policies you've voted for. I hope that you eventually realize what you've done. I hope that you'll take responsibility for what you've unleashed and work to combat the bigotry and crime that is coming. Ultimately, though, I hope, when you do realize everything that's happened and everything is said and done, that you can forgive yourself.
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pekkhum · 5 months ago
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Are you trans yourself or is it just your daughter? :0
And in any case, how is her transition going so far?
Sending much love <3
I think this will be more fun to answer via story time and the long mode answer:
Around the time of my 37th birthday I started seeing a couple incredibly hilarious and relatable memes about being trans go by on my feed. They were just so great that I found myself seeking out more and learning to understand trans folk more and more. I kept wanting to comment and holding myself back, because, of course I'm not trans, I just feel all the things trans women feel all the time and have struggled with those feelings since I was very, very young. Still cis, though.
There was eventually a day when the dam broke and I admitted online that I am trans, but it was three days later, while reading about internalized transphobia, that it all hit home. I had myself a nice little fit about how I didn't want to be trans, not because it is bad, but because the world makes life suck for trans people. (Actually, 6 months before, in the most egg moment ever, I told a woman that I had been thinking about how hard life as a transgender lesbian would be and that it would be much easier to be a straight guy. I was wrong for reasons most trans folk can guess.)
That day, I sat my child down to explain that I've realized that I am very much trans, that I have resources she can read to understand what that all means, and that I would let her other parent know, so she had someone else to talk to if she wanted. (Thankfully, we are peacefully divorced, so that wasn't an issue.)
I later found out that my child had devoured those resources, stolen one of my skirts my work-mom gave me (she's so supportive) and tried on names, pronouns, and skirts. It was a month later that she greeted me in the morning in a skirt and informed me that she was certain her feelings weren't something else and I discovered that I have a daughter! 😊
I was in the process of trying to get HRT and my insurance changed, then my health network intentionally and willfully screwed me over and yanked my chain, because they didn't want to provide a referral (it turned out to be owned by the Catholic church, here in America), but didn't want to admit their bigotry. I was forced to change health networks and get a new primary and wait months for a new appointment for a referral and my daughter's needs were similarly delayed, but she was even further behind! I had just gotten HRT when I was laid off and left with no insurance. This means I'm on an incorrect dose and my daughter hasn't gotten hers.
To make matters worse, our ADHD has made sitting down for voice training or learning makeup (it is so overwhelming!) difficult for us and we've not found others willing and able to help with the latter. My daughter has gotten a lot of nice clothing from her mama (I'm mom, the ex is mama 🤷‍♀️), and she just looks so cute, but she hasn't felt brave enough to present at school or anything. I'm hoping a GSA in college will help, but I'm making sure not to push her. She's still figuring out her personal vibe, but it seems to lean toward her mama's style, instead of my tastes, with just a few exceptions. Whatever she goes with, I'm proud beyond belief!
I joined a writer's group and only ever introduced myself under my unmistakably femme chosen name and everyone was cool with my very unfemme appearing dysphoria hoodie wearing self. I am grateful beyond belief. The dose may be too low, but the HRT has been very much working. Unfortunately, even freshly shaved with a straight razor, my beard is forever visible (I'm told a little blush or color corrector can hide that, but keep looking horrible when I try), but thanks to HRT, I at least saw a woman with a beard shadow, when last I walked into the bathroom. (Also, I fill out my sundress more, now!)
With family and friends, we are fully socially transitioned, though, and I am grateful, every day, for those we've been able to keep. It wasn't all, but it seems I'd already cut the problems, in advance. Also, we can both wear whatever around the house, so we dress for ourselves, at least.
We dressed up extra for our first Pride parade, though! I won't have a ton of opportunities to wear that rainbow skirt, but I love it greatly!
We are early in transition, with lots of problems yet to solve, but we are so much happier, so far. I'm finally alive and she finally cares about who she will be! We're also so much closer now and have opened up a lot more to each other. I adore my daughter and I'm so glad to be her mom! 💖🥲
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detransition · 8 months ago
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from dickevandyke The other day a friend of mine said they hardly even consider me detrans because I "didn't really do anything to detransition". I didn't ask what they meant by that, because they're not really the kind of person I can have that sort of conversation with. I didn't want to have to explain to them why I detransitioned. I didn't want to have to justify finally feeling okay with myself after spending my teenage years being miserable and stressed about being trans.
It's kind of a fascinating mindset, though. I think it gives really wonderful insight as to how their brain works. Like, I stopped taking testosterone. I stopped asking to be referred to by male pronouns. I "came out" as a woman, and I Came Out as a Lesbian after also spending most of my teenage years trying very hard to repress my attraction to women. This person doesn't view that as doing anything. Why?
I imagine it's because I dress fairly masculine - as Butches generally do. I wear still wear, mostly, "boyish clothes". I didn't start wearing make-up. I didn't let my hair grow out long. I haven't done any voice training, or really made an effort to make my voice higher pitched like it was before. I haven't gotten breast implants. I rarely correct people when they call me "sir". I don't need to do any of those things. A stranger calling me "sir" doesn't mean I am not a woman. Not having breasts anymore doesn't mean that I'm not a woman. The point of my detransition was not to turn myself into a stereotype or to dive head-first into femininity.
The point of my detransition was just that I am finally comfortable with myself, just as I am. That doesn't mean that I love my body, but I am okay with it. I am at peace with who I am.
Do I regret getting a mastectomy? Yes. There was no other reason to remove my breasts, they were perfectly fine, they were small and didn't cause me any back pain, I didn't have any medical issues related to them. Do I regret wearing a binder? Absolutely. It has screwed up my ribs and back so severely that I am probably going to be living with chronic pain for the rest of my life. Do I regret going on HRT? Sometimes, sometimes not. Honestly, it didn't really change much for me outside of my voice and making my body hair slightly thicker. Do I regret social transition? Absolutely. I dug myself into such a deep hole of self loathing and repression that it took me three years to finally crawl out of it. So after going through all of that - after putting myself, my body through all of that, why would I want to do it all over again in the opposite direction, when there is absolutely no need for it?
I "didn't do anything to detransition" because I don't need to do anything to be a woman, I just am one. Woman is my natural state. I "didn't do anything to detransition" because I already put my body through three years of cross-sex hormones, five-ish years of binding, and an unnecessary mastectomy which has left me unable to feel most of my chest more than a year post-op. I don't need more unnecessary surgeries or expensive treatments to make myself into a woman, I never really stopped being one. Getting breast implants wouldn't make me more of a woman because I don't need breasts to be a woman. Voice training to make my voice a higher pitch again won't make me more of a woman because a high pitched voice was never what made me a woman in the first place. Wearing make-up, growing out my hair, wearing "girly" clothes wouldn't make me more of a woman, because femininity does not make a woman.
I didn't argue with them when they said that because, to be honest, I don't want to hear what they think makes a woman. I don't want to hear them trying to justify why they barely consider me detrans because I have not tried to turn myself into a feminine stereotype. It just really struck a chord with me, because if I'm not really detrans to them, am I really a woman to them? Or do they see me as some kind of "failed" woman because despite explicitly and openly accepting my womanhood, I am not their picture of what a woman is suppose to be?
thinking of detransition? you are not alone
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fluffybumblebeedoodle · 15 days ago
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Edit: since everyone is getting pissed, this is opinionated. If you like him, I can hate him. Believe what you want, just go to trusted news sources to get it 👍
Excuse me, why are Trump votes on Tumblr? Don’t get pissed when someone voices their opinion.
Call me a leftist. You say it like it’s a bad thing.
I try to stay out of politics, but look at Project 2025. He supports it. Who gives a f*** if he didn’t write it. That thing that said he doesn’t support it is stupid.
It wants to get rid of everything we ; as allies, and LGBTQ+, as women, and people who aren’t white (I am white, for context) ; have worked for.
I’m frustrated, to say the least. Gain a brain cell and Google. I did.
Maybe, instead of speaking out your asses, you’ll realize he doesn’t want to take the blame for a nationwide abortion ban. Knowing the state I live in is red, I’m screwed.
Maybe this is also my opinion, if you try to even say he isn’t gonna screw us over, I’m blocking. Sorry, but this saves my mental health.
Stay safe,
Bee
To anyone arguing, listen, he promised to get rid of critical race theory in school, he is stoping trans people from joining teams of their gender, and he is deporting international students who voice support for Palestinians. He calls immigrants ‘vermin’. Quoting a certain fascist leader. Vance called him ‘American H!tler’. Vance is an idiot and a half, but Trump promised to be dictator for a day.
It also doesn’t change the fact people who are voting for him are racist. Not all of his voters, but racists voted for Trump. They see that as a freeway to calling people whatever they want.
Also, Robert F Kennedy Jr, is the head of the department of health and human services. He’s a vaccine sceptic. Like, excuse me, how does that work?
Honestly, his whole campaign is built on his ideals and things to go against his ideals. He just can’t make up his mind.
For anyone saying Kamala let in rapists, Trump is one. They forgot to include that there are so many in America. America is a sh*tshow and a half.
And, yes, I did edit this. I changed something I said earlier to be more respectful. Sorry if the acronym POC offended you. I changed it.
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kunaigirl · 7 months ago
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You know what screw it I'm making my own positivity post!
Here's to the butch lesbians who are soft and sweet. Here's to the butch lesbians who are shy and kind. Here's to the butch lesbians who don't like strap-ons. Here's to the butch lesbians who are silly and goofy. Here's to the butch lesbians who still enjoy cute things and get annoyingly excited over everything. Here's to the butch lesbians of faith. Here's to the butch lesbians who are vanilla. Here's to the butches who worry they won't be taken seriously in our own community because we might not be perceived as "tough enough" to fit in.
We're not any less valid in our gender-nonconformity and lesbianism just because we don't adhere to the stereotypes that masculine women should always be hardcore tops and have an abrasive attitudes at all times.
Obviously, there's nothing wrong with butches who are stone and gruff, they're all awesome too! I just wanted to make a post for butches like me. I've been invalidated by others (a few times actually) for being "too soft to count as a true butch" despite still taking pride in my identity as a masculine presenting and gender non-conforming gay woman.
There's no wrong way to be a butch lesbian! WE ROCK! Also yes this post IS trans inclusive btw!
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