#just send an ask if its a general question
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fuchsiadial · 8 months ago
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guys i dont wanna reblog the same post over and over again just to have a convo, im sorry. i use tags for feedback directed at the OP, i do not expect anyone else to answer them, unless it's like... performative or something. if you wanna tell me something then please just send an ask, comment or dm. this prev tag thing is stressful to me
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dreamingofthedteam · 1 year ago
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so i saw the video and im really happy for dream and that he can finally leave this entire thing behind him get it off his shoulders and just go on ahead and post mc content (ALSO YAY MINECRAFT DREAM BACK IN 2024 LETS GOOOOOOOO)
the thing that saddened me the most about this was the doxxing and swatting stuff. like that is a very horrible thing to have to go thru. that shit is not a joke i imagine, living in a country that is notorious for an overpowered police force. and i hope to fucking god that what dream predicted (that this shit is going to get out of the mcyt space and into other yt communities over time) will not turn out to be true. the story about sapnap moving in with him so that he can answer the door to the fucking police while hes live just..its depressing man. and god i hadnt ever even heard of the time he got swatted while george was live that was a fucking jumpscare he must have been so worried
but. also. i think its time for, well me atleast, to self reflect a bit? ig? for context im talking about the end of the video where he restated his boundaries. im not someone who likes to stay in the problematic parts of the internet. i run from drama like its the wildfire from asoiaf. ( i also have caved in and posted abt neg stuff im not denying anything but i try to limit to private posts) and to think that i in any way could be on the wrong side of this all by shipping dnf? it gives me a bit of self doubt, ngl. i dont know if what i do would be classified as "srs shipping" or i would be put into "/srs dnf truther" by others, but i def thought and kinda still think 'oh dnf real' and now i just dont know where i stand..? i definitely need to think on it a bit. also i think i have interacted with nsfw art on this blog before, and goddamit i cant even check coz stupid me didnt even bother to tag properly, but from now on all nsfw art (not that i expect there to be many more) will be properly tagged. and if its not just tell me (idk who even is reading this anymore but whatever). as to dnf posting? idk. ill have to wait and see the general mood on here
and also like, that bit def has left a sour taste in my mouth AND IM NOT SAYING THATS DREAMS FAULT but its just...its tough man. dream having to change his mindset on fan spaces because of all this just saddens me a lot. and him saying that has then changed MY mindset on fandom, especially rpf, as someone whose both primary fandoms are rpf. i hope maybe in the future dream is able to engage on a more positive level and not have to just cut himself off from it entirely (im not sad abt him leaving twitter like, good riddance bitches, but i think i'll just miss a random tweet from him to wake up to)
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tianhai03 · 2 years ago
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alright i think that's enough ask answering for today, i've filled the dash with enough random ramblings already so i'll be clearing my inbox now. thanks to everyone who sent smth i had a lot of fun talking about eating popsicles and biting hands 👍
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joshuamj · 11 days ago
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in regards to last reblog (specifically my tags on it), very friendly reminder that i would love to receive asks, i promise u will not be bothering me. Just be prepared cuz depending on what u say i may ramble on and on.
#josh talks#here's a prompt for some of yall to possibly send to my ask box#if you aren't in some of my fandoms that i reblog a lot of stuff from#what impression do you have from what little you have osmosed through me or in general?#i loooove hearing outsider's views of fandoms and stuff its always very funny and often quite interesting too#esp In Stars And Time#i am quite curious what people may assume/gathered about it#but yea u could say stuff like that or just say hi or send me a question#basically anything really!#it can be an opinion on a fandom or ship or an artstyle question or whatever#or if u wanna rant about a fandom in common that would be cool too#im a very anxious person so i totally get the hesitation to send asks#so feel free to go anon#and remember u are not bothering me in the slightest! i would love to hear from u!#and if its been like. a really long time. and i havent answered ur ask.#theres a fair chance Tumblr Is Being Weird and like ate the ask#so i wouldnt mind u sending it again. probably#ive never gotten an ask i didnt know how to respond to but i occassionally get strange messages that i just dont know how to respond to#theres this person on instagram that keeps sending me very nonsensical messages with no context and i feel a little bad#that ive never responded. but i just really dont know what to say and they make me anxious.#so yea just a tip if u are gonna send messages/asks maybe remember I Don't Know You#so u gotta provide context maybe say hi#before saying certain stuff#cuz if u dont i may be either confused uncomfortable or anxious about the message and may not respond due to that
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voidimp · 2 months ago
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hhhe u should ask me abt my ocs
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omgthatdress · 2 months ago
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Sooooo ummmmmmm this is something that's probably going to piss a lot of people off, but I feel like I really need to say it.
If you get a message from an account claiming to be a Palestinian fundraiser, it is a bot. It is a scam. You need to report & delete the message and encourage others to do the same.
I know because I get messages on this account DAILY. I have a very high follower count and I'm pretty active and I interact with my followers a lot, and apparently that all adds up to one big bot magnet.
Bots following and messaging this account was a MASSIVE problem before Tumblr fixed its new account policies. I used to spend literally hours blocking and reporting the hundreds of bots that I would get following me each day.
I learned a lot about bots and how to identify them. The easiest way is with no avatar, "untitled" in the blog description (BTW if your avatar is still set to default PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD change it because you run a substantial risk of being accidentally blocked & reported as a bot).
One of the dead give aways of a bot was what I call "word salad" names. Three seemingly random words strung together making no sense, always adjective, adjective or noun, noun. If you reported a lot of these bots, you'd notice the same words kept showing up.
Nowadays, I am bombarded with fundraiser requests and sometimes, they don't even bother to hide the fact that they're a bot. The avatar is default, the blog title is "untitled," and the blog name is a classic randomly-generated word salad.
However MOST of the requests I get come from at least semi-legit looking accounts. There are pictures, a name, a story. Never mind that I've gotten that message three times from different accounts.
Sometimes, they claim to be vetted, but the whole vetting system essentially adds up to "trust me bro." There is no way of guaranteeing that this account isn't just lying about being vetted, claiming to be vetted by a false person, or are using the identity of a real Palestinian to scam people.
Previously, I've seen a lot of people getting attacked for raising questions about these fundraisers and getting attacked for being racist or for harming Palestinian families in danger, like Tumblr isn't a website famous for its scams and the words "The Arkh Project" "All or Nothing" or "Miss Officer and Mr. Truffles" mean nothing to you.
I personally have been scammed by people claiming to be charities on Tumblr before, specifically, The Leelah Project which used the name of a trans teenager who died by suicide to swindle people out of their money.
Luckily, there are actual, respected charities out there you can give money to if you want to help the cause:
Palestinian Children's Relief Fund
Palestine Red Crescent Society
United Nations Relief Works Agency
Islamic Relief
World Central Kitchen
Médecins Sans Frontièrs
One of the hardest things to accept about the situation in Palestine is that realistically, there is very little that your average outsider can do to change it. However, these large, well-respected and trustworthy charities are out there doing the hard work to keep people alive, and should be where the donation money is going
These scam bots feed on people's naïvety and need to believe that they are making a difference, and even worse, feed on the fear that by ignoring them, it somehow makes you a racist doing direct harm to a refugee family, when in fact they are using the suffering of Palestinians to take away money from those in need.
As far as fundraisers that don't send out random asks for donations, I honestly don't know. You'll have to do the work yourself and approach with much caution.
Be careful out there.
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lymtw · 7 months ago
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Thinking of an argument with Toji that leaves you mute by choice towards him. He still talks to you and asks you questions, and while you don't turn away from him, you don't respond to him either. He ends up having to figure out whatever he needs on his own because after a minute or so you huff and walk away from the conversation.
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"Mama," he calls from the bedroom, rummaging through his clothing drawers. "Have you seen my gym shorts?"
If he was able to get a word out of you, he would know that you washed them for him. Though you were still sizzling with anger towards him, you pulled them out of the dryer and walked them over to the room. He could hear your little footsteps as you approached the room, and when he turned to look at you, he noticed you were holding his shorts in your hand.
Your eyes were vacant towards him. You didn't want them to be because it sucks when you can't look at him with the endless amount of love you have in store for him. It's still there, but it's being masked by a poker face.
You toss the shorts onto the bed and leave. Toji sighs, irked by the fact that it's actually starting to sting now. Your disregard for him because you're ruled by your emotions and he lets things go too easily because he can't hold a grudge towards you, even if he feels you're in the wrong.
Toji never knew how much he depended on your voice until you wouldn't let him hear it. He depends on you to tell him where things are because without you they would be scattered all over the place. He doesn't know your method of organization, but somehow when he needs something and looks to you in order to find it, you pull it out from right under his nose. He depends on you to tell him he's doing a good job, and to tell him you love him, and just reassure him in general. It makes him feel good to know that someone thinks he's good enough, but recently the one person who feeds him affection like it's as important as food and water, has left him to starve. You haven't said a word to him in almost two days, and he feels like he's starting to go crazy. The sound of his own voice is driving him insane. It's gotten so bad that he had to make a mental note of how he's going to get you back that same night.
Toji leaves for the gym and texts you during his time there. He includes some images because it's now an unspoken rule that he always has to send you gym pics.
[ Attachment: 3 Images]
... 😳🤐
Yeah, I know you like those. I'll be home soon.
You take the time to doll yourself up while he's still out. It's for him, but you won't tell him that until you come back from your "night out". Really, you're just gonna go get dinner for both of you from his favorite little restaurant. You just want to see how far he's willing to let this go, because you're caving. You're ready to apologize even when you know he's not upset at all. You're ready to spoil him in order to make up for those severe feelings you held towards him. You're ready to hear about how stubborn and unbelievable you are for this little act you pulled.
You spray on some perfume and walk out of the bathroom, just in time to catch Toji walking through the door.
"Woof, where're you going, ma?" He asks, setting down his gym bag before absorbing everything you were gracing him with. His eyes flit up and down your body, lingering on the very bare skin of the legs that come out from under your skirt. He can smell your perfume from where he stands, its elegant scent masking even the smell of his own potent sweat.
You didn't answer his question, and left him to wonder why you're all dressed up at seven o'clock at night. Was it a girl's night or were you openly showing him that you have options? Did he miss a message or a call from you?
You grabbed your wallet and scooted past him. You walked halfway down the corridor of your apartment building before realizing that maybe this was a bit much. You would make him worry over you going on a five minute walk to grab some food? All so you can show him you're mad? You cracked.
🥟🥡🍜.
Toji was staring at his screen, waiting for anything from you. The screen flashes like some sort of miracle and your message is seen by him. He chuckles, feeling a sense of relief wash over him at the sight of your little emoticons.
You came back home as fast as possible, bags of food in hand as you patiently waited for the elevator to bring you up to your floor. You took your time walking through the corridor, this time, not knowing how you would react once you saw Toji or if you would immediately say something to him. You're ready to talk to him, you want to talk to him. You miss him, you love him, and you hate the passiveness you threw yourself into around him as an act of retaliation.
There you were, standing in front of the door, nervous beyond belief for what was behind it. You collected yourself and twisted the doorknob, ready to face anything that came to you.
Toji stood from the couch and walked over to you to take the bags from your hands. The smell of his body wash wafted into your nose. There was an imaginary white flag hanging out of your pocket, and it was about to fall out to signal your surrender to Toji.
He pecks your cheek and watches in real time as color floods into your face. It's one of the most adorable things he's ever seen—you standing there so rigidly afterwards. He gives you a soft smile and resists the urge to coo at you for being so cute. Instead, he heads to the table to put the bags of food down.
You shut the door, and within a split second, Toji was in front of you again. "Ma," he says, sounding a little more desperate than he thought he would. "Say something." You stand there like a statue—unmoving, but unlike a statue, you are easily moveable. Especially, by Toji. "Anything, mama, please." He crouches down at your feet, his warm hands resting on the backs of your knees and his cheek resting on one of your thighs. This position made it look like you were being worshipped by him, and anyone who ever saw him do this would know that it was true, because he worshipped everything about you. From the top of your head, to the ground your feet stood on.
"Don't you miss having my hands on you?" They glide up and down the backs of your thighs. He looks up at your stunned expression. You won't look down at him, so he gets to see the way you swallow the words dying to leave your mouth, and the slight widening of your eyes as he lets his hands roam your lower body. "I know I do. I've been in hell these past couple days." He presses a soft kiss to your knee, then one more on your thigh. "I didn't mean what I said. I don't think you're selfish, baby. Maybe i'm just a greedy asshole," he says, rekindling the subject of what led to your silence towards him. His hand maneuvers around your leg so that his palm is on your thigh, making its way up towards the inner part of it. "But, I know something," his lips trail further up your thigh, softly kissing your skin. "I'm greedy about you. That can't and won't be changed, even when we argue like idiots."
You put your hand on his head as he starts kissing up your inner thighs, making his way even further up beneath your skirt.
"Come on, my sweet girl," he murmurs, his lips meeting the front of your underwear. "Tell me you want me to stop. Tell me you hate that my filthy paws are on you, right now."
Your legs tremble at the lightness of his touch, and you internally cringe at how sensitive you've always been for him.
"Toji..." you gasp. You feel his warm tongue flatten between your legs, a slow upwards drag of the muscle makes your thighs quiver before him. You whimper at the damp warmth his saliva leaves on your panties. "Fuck..." you moan, breathily. "Don't stop. Stay there, please."
The first word you reintroduced yourself with being a moaned out rendition of his name was heaven reaching down to pat him on the back for knowing exactly what to do to get you to talk again.
"Open wider for me, baby. Let me see," Toji says, your skirt still veiled over his head. You take a step back so that your back is against the door and widen your stance a little more. He hooks one of your legs over his shoulder and you shudder when his tongue returns to slide through your clothed folds. He doesn't even need to produce that much saliva to drench the fabric of your underwear because you've done that for him already with your leaking arousal.
You shut your eyes and rest your head against the door as Toji continues his act of filth between your thighs. You can hear him panting below you, your taste pleasantly coating his tongue every time he sucks on the garment that clings to you.
You cry out his name with sharp breaths following, your fingers tangling into his locks, gripping and tugging as his lips catch onto your cunt. "Fuck, fuck, fuck," you grit out, whimpering at the contrast between his mouth and his hands. His hands offer a gentle massage to your thighs, softly kneading the plush between his fingers. His mouth moves purposefully because he knows exactly what it takes to make you fall apart with it. He coats his tongue with your essence every time he laps at the wet patch on your underwear, sticky webs of arousal connecting him to you.
"T-Toji!" You squeal, your cunt throbbing with every brush of his tongue. "I'm gonna cum... Fuck, i'm gonna cum..." you whine.
Toji pushes your underwear to the side, and glides his tongue through your generously slicked folds once and you're instantly arching your back off the door, squirming in his hold and moaning carelessly as he sloppily makes out with your cunt. He desperately chases the sound of your pleasure-ridden voice, wanting to hear the way it raises in pitch when he strokes you just right. He doesn't want it to stop, it's been too long. Two days way too long. You tug at his hair with one hand, dragging the nails of your other hand down the door. You breathe heavily as Toji manipulates your pleasure until your thighs are trembling.
Toji pulls away and lifts your skirt off his head. He lowers your leg back down and stands up from his crouched position. He faces you with glossy lips that shine with all the juices he collected from you, some of it drooling down his chin to give him an even more messy appearance. He presses his lips to yours, making slow movements to allow you to realize what is happening while your eyes are closed. You can taste yourself on his lips as you catch the rhythm.
There's a loud smack in the last kiss before he releases you, a feral look in his green eyes as he dotes on your blissed out appearance. You look too pure for someone who's just experienced something so sinful. "Hey, look at me," he coos, cupping your cheeks in his hands. "Look at me," he repeats, staring at you as you try to catch your breath with closed eyes.
You hum, rolling your eyes open to lazily stare back at him. Your eyelids felt so heavy as you looked at him, but you liked how vigilant he was being. It made you crack a grin, a small gesture that had Toji's heart thudding a little quicker, now.
"I wanna fuck you so bad, mama." His eyes trail yours as they look away from his gaze. "If this is your reaction to my mouth, I don't even know what to expect for when I'm inside you."
You look down to see what's been poking your thigh for the past minute or so, and it's the monster in his pants, outlined for your eyes to quickly spot and everything.
"Come on," you say, reaching your hand out to him. He takes it and allows you to lead him to the bedroom.
Toji shuts the door and locks it to give the situation a deeper level of intimacy. There's no one there but the two of you and yet you feel even more secluded by the gesture.
He wasn't aggressive in the way he bared you for his eyes. He pulled you close to him by the waist, your body against his as he peeled your layers of clothes off.
"Stay," he says, when you take a step back. He takes that step towards you again, placing his hands on your hips, and snaking them around to your back to locate the zipper for your skirt. He exhales through his nose, lidded eyes watching the longing expression on your face closely as he pulls down the zipper and allows the article to fall on the floor. His fingers fiddle with the hem of your shirt before he fully slides his hands beneath it, and raises it up your torso higher and higher. You put your arms up and allow him to slip it off your head.
He makes haste of getting his own clothes off, a sly smirk decorating his face when he sees you admiring him from where you sit on the end of the bed as you take off your bra and underwear. You're forced further up the bed by Toji as he inches closer and closer to you. You reach a dead end and welcome the suffocating warmth of his body as he cages you onto the bed.
"Don't do that to me again, mama," he murmurs, before leaning down to peck your lips. "Don't let me talk to myself for that long when you have such a pretty voice to respond with."
You laugh, pulling a small grin from him. "I didn't think you'd care, to be honest. I thought you'd tell me i'm being childish or ridiculous."
"Nah, princess. I thought I was gonna die."
You giggle, pulling him close again. "You're exaggerating."
"You wouldn't let me touch you. Not even when we went to bed, so it was like we were friends instead of lovers sleeping together. Especially with how far on your side you slept."
"Oh, baby," you coo, pressing multiple quick apologetic kisses to his lips. He chuckles at the affection, and his eyes close instinctively as your kisses become more widespread on his face. He missed this more than anything. "What can I do for your forgiveness, my love?"
"Just let me fuck you, ma. That's all. Give me my privilege to all of this, again." His hand slowly trails from your chest to your stomach, a touch you longed for dearly during those two days that you verbally ignored him.
"It's yours," you whisper to him. You peer up at him with your constellation eyes, silently begging him to realize how much you need him. "I'm yours, so show me the use you have for the privilege over my body, baby."
He leans down to kiss you, softly. He's desperate for you, but his lips don't falter their delicate synchrony because of it. He guides the tip of his cock through your folds, rubbing up and down the slickness a couple times before slowly sinking into you. Your ability to tangle with Toji's lips slowly deteriorates, and your focus strays to the stretching happening lower down your body, so Toji picks up the slack and feeds you his kisses.
"Come on," he groans out. Not even he is immune to the rebirth of sex with you. You're warm and inviting, and you embrace the pain and comfort he offers every time he craves you or you crave him. This time is no exception. "Kiss me back, sweetheart. Give them all to me," he mutters, before attempting to connect his lips to yours again. You dig your heels into the mattress and your toes curl as you feel his girth continue to submerge inside you.
Toji cups your chin and uses his fingers to squish your cheeks together into a makeshift pout for him to kiss. He can hear your hummed little whimpers in response to him sheathing himself further into you. He was being gentle, because hurting you is a crime in his world.
"Fuck, I missed this, mama," he says, goosebumps rising on his torso as he drags himself out of you halfway and pushes himself back in again. "So warm..." he says over the sound of your pleasured moan. He sighs, a grunt following as he starts a careful rocking rhythm into you. "I could stay inside you forever."
"I could keep you here forever," you rephrase, gazing up at him with those eyes he unequivocally loves. They've reverted back to the default loving expression you hold for him, the vacancy of your previous gaze now filled with love, excitement, lust, and overall enchantment. It's a beautiful thing to see your hurricanes subside.
He leans down to kiss you again, distributing the kisses on your face and leading them towards your neck. You could feel his abs dragging up and down your stomach with every roll of his hips against yours.
"Mmm... Toji," you moan, bringing your hands to his back. One of them moves up to the nape of his neck, threading through the dampened locks of his hair, the other traces his spine to distract you from how badly you want to dig your nails into him.
"I know," he coos, kissing the spot beneath your ear. "I know, doll. It's always this good with you."
You gasp at the feeling of his cock prodding the more sensitive area within you. "Right there, right there... Oh..." you moan out, inevitably digging your nails into his shoulder blades while Toji directs his kisses back up your neck and towards your face again so he can see the honest expression on it. You're lost in pleasure, vibrating as another orgasm rushes through you.
"Fuck, mama.. let me-" he groans, outwardly losing it at the overflow of your juices. "Let me see those pretty eyes," he pants, gripping your waist a little more harshly as he feels his cock on the brink of expelling into you. "Need you to watch me," he says, taking in the way your lips part to release your sounds of utter satisfaction. Your eyes flutter open to center on his greedy eyes. You mirror his lustful, lidded gaze, the look enough to make him spill inside you, making your cunt even sloppier. "You're gorgeous, ma," he says, mindlessly, as he fucks into you with a little more fervor. "Fucking stunning," he mutters through pants, to which you respond with a sly smirk. The gesture lured a groan out of him and made his cock twitch as he finished releasing into you.
You giggle when he stills his hips. Your combined attempts to regulate your breathing fills the silence that follows. "What're you laughing at?" He asks, massaging your hip with his thumb.
"You tell me that all the time like you're obsessed with me or something."
"And if I am?" he says with a voice so deep you have to blink to see that it's still your gentle giant of a man. "Is it too much for you? Can you handle it? Am I suffocating you, baby?" he purrs, cupping your cheeks while leaning in close to emphasize his points. All it does is allow you to closely admire how handsome he is and really think about what's happening in this moment. This green-eyed, raven-haired man, with the prettiest pointed nose and the most attractive scarred lips, is bedding you, and doing it so well.
"Never. Come closer and bite," you murmur.
He takes your lips in his again, a little more aggressive than before. You asked him to bite, and that's exactly what he's doing. The make out has him rocking both of you a little faster, working you towards yet another orgasm. You nip at his bottom lip and run your tongue over it when hisses. You hum out a little giggle, and moan into his mouth when he jolts into you.
"God, i'll bust again if you keep doing that. I'm serious, mama" he groans, swiping his tongue over his stinging bottom lip. You think he's being dramatic so when he leans down to kiss you again, you bite his bottom lip and suck on it. You gasp, releasing his lip and stare at him with wide eyes as his excessive warmth spurts into your cunt, filling it to the brim and beyond, to the point of leakage.
"F-Fuck... you're terrible," he groans, shuddering with tense abdominal muscles as he lures the entirety of his orgasm out. "Cum," he says, panting as he picks up the pace of his rutting to get you to follow his orgasm. "I can feel you clenching around me like hell. I know you want to," he says, reaching a hand between you and him to stimulate your clit.
Your already labored breathing picks up and your heart is pounding in your ears aggressively as you roll your hips back against his. You whimper as you feel your peak get closer and closer, a cried out and breathy "fuck!" leaving you when it arrives, followed by high pitched moans that make Toji's heart race. You arched your back off the mattress as you reached the zenith of your orgasm with the help of Toji's finger rapidly rubbing your clit while he maintained his satisfying pace inside you.
You whimper, slapping a hand onto Toji's wrist to stop his movements on you. He smirks at the sight of your trembling thighs, your heaving chest, and the sound of your dazed hums. You always were such a delicate thing. So fragile that even with just enough of his attention, he could break you.
"Tired yet?" He asks, admiring your relaxed facial features. You nod with your eyes closed, your lips parted to release little puffs of air. "Thought you'd be. I'll go grab some towels for us to shower." He pulls out of you, taking a moment to admire your collaborative masterpiece.
"Baby..." you whine, sitting up when you feel his weight lift off the bed. "I can't get up." You dramatically let yourself fall back on the bed and stick your tongue out to portray your exhaustion.
"Get up, you faker. That's all you have to do and i'll take care of the rest."
"Too tired to wash myself right now..." you say, waking up for a second before closing your eyes again. Toji can see the sly grin on your face and the little shake of your stomach as you stifle your giggles.
"Guess you're too tired to eat, too, huh? You know i've got a huge appetite, and I could eat all that food you brought by myself."
"You wouldn't," you say, abruptly sitting up on the bed and squinting at him. "There's enough to feed three people in those bags."
"I've got the stomach of three people in one, so you better catch up before you're left with my seconds."
You sigh, too tired to move, but you get up anyway and trail behind Toji. "Baby, can you pleeease clean me up? I'm beat."
He puts his hands on your shoulders as he now walks behind you. "Sure, but don't complain when I take longer on certain areas."
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affableramen · 2 months ago
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kinktober. their love language when they want it suggestiveness, smut, established stage of relationship
minors do not interact
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Wriothesley
when he’s secretly horny and wants that with you, he acts incredibly messy and awkward. it looks very endearing in its own way how he bumps into things while walking or messes up his words because his tongue feels so twisted due to slight adrenaline rush
when he wants to have sx with you, it’s almost obvious even though he tries to keep it hidden. always collected and cool wriothesley appears somehow chaotic and out of his usual mood. you notice that his eyes have become softer, their colour slightly darker and deeper
as if feigning innocence he freely discusses work and domestic matters with you, while his eyes run up and down your face, finally stopping at your lips
he will awkwardly place his hands around your waist and let a shaky whisper into your ear “do you think we could… y’know… spend some private time together? as in bed activities, i mean. i’m feeling a bit needy today.”
Tartaglia
when he wants sx, he will be a complete opposite to wriothesley. tartaglia will suddenly become serious, sharply-looking and tensed up. he will be more collected than ever as if trying to win you over by being a good boy behaviour-wise
he will not speak a word to you, and it will be quite unexpected from someone usually quite extraverted and generally active. he will do everything the whole day to satisfy you: at work, training, domestic troubles - anything really, he will follow you everywhere like a dog and be very attentive to what needs done to help you 
when you ask him why he is so quiet, you will see his lips slowly twitch into a smirk as he responds “i was just gathering enough stamina to give you the best night of your life”
you feel swayed and smitten, coz you did not expect his seriousness to cary a hidden desire of being with you tonight. “so you put that whole show on because you wanted to have something tonight?” and given how quiet and well-behaved he is today you consider giving him what he wants (and something that you want too)
Neuvillette
his behaviour will be different from usual not because he suddenly sends you a bouquet that is even more luxurious than the previous one a few days ago, but because his whole mood seems unnecessarily flirty
usually a calm, smooth and husband-like neuvillette goes to work, picks you up from work and arranges a quiet dinner for the two of you in your favourite restaurant or orders for home, but tonight he gives it a real stretch: neuvillette basically books a place in the extremely expensive restaurant, and the table is quite detached from everyone else, next to the panoramic window, the room extremely dimly lit. you are surprised but also amused by his passionate attitude and it’s difficult to guess that he wants the continuation of the romantic dinner later in your bedroom
he will not ask for it, he will explicitly tell you that he wants to have sex with you tonight, that he is in the mood for some passionate activity and ready to give you pleasure
getting rid of his solid formal suit he will lay you onto the bed with his strong hands and stay naked in front of your for a couple of seconds just letting you admire his hard-on. and even if you are long behind early stage of relationship, and intimate activity isn’t something impressive to you, neuvi will find a way to make it less dull and more thrilling
Pantalone
you will know that he wants it after feeling his fingers linger on your waist, hand or shoulder slightly too longer than usual. as if starved for touch, pantalone will seek opportunity to graze his fingers against you. he is not super awkward like wriothesley, but the “eating” look on his face would definitely give him away. and the way his answers to your questions come later and he seems to choose his words very carefully might also be a sign that the man is quite horny
sudden nude photos he will send you. they can be both explicit or simply suggestive, but he will let you know about his mood
he sends you same day delivery gifts that contain very, i’m telling you, very beautiful lingerie that must be implying some sort of fantasy from him
the banker is not the type to dive into lust the same minute he feels horny, but he definitely has a timing for his turn on, so he will let you know, very subtly and intricately, that he kinda has a problem down there, and he wants you to help him fix it. also, he finds having sex in the office tacky and against his office etiquette rules, so he will wait until the two of you get home. but don’t be too sure that he won’t start seducing you right in the vestibule - he loves pressing you against the wall of his mansion lobby and taking you right there, not possessing enough patience to lead you into the bedroom
Dottore
he seems to be constantly involved into his work and focused on tasks appearing on his tablet or monitor, but during the break you notice that he acts like you’re the centre of his world and work can wait. you feel his hand roam over your ass during the kiss which is unlike him, the doctor must be very horny to touch you so intimately during a simple kiss
suspiciously quiet and agreeable the whole day as if he wants something but doesn’t say :) he holds your hand way too often and sensually grazes his fingers over it as if he cannot get enough of your presense and scent while being extremely supportive of whatever you suggest 
questions that are completely out of place: like if you would agree to take aphrodisiac with him, if you ever considered stimulants or other ways to make your intimate time memorable
looks at you slight a bit too much that everyone in the room takes notice of. at this point, everyone knows what’s going through dottore’s mind, except for you, because he seems quite normal for you (he will let you know what he truly wants once the work is finally finished and he can sin)
Capitano
he will be quiet for the most of the day as he’s trying to come up with a decision on how exactly his tsundere ass is supposed to confess about being horny
cold treatment by acting dismissive and hostile which ends as soon as the both of you’re finally alone without others’ eyes and ears. and just as the two of you finally get a chance for a private moment capitano will be at loss for words, his tongue is suddenly slurring words and he looks like he forgot how to speak at all, before you explicitly ask him if he wants something 
mostly you are the first one to bring the initiative of being intimate, but once he’s done with the cold treatment and both of you know how horny capitano is, he will be suddenly too attentive to your presence. his eyes will be literally glued to you. that happens because while you’re around, even simply sitting on the sofa across from his desk, it gives him a hard-on. he just finds you too irresistible, especially in the days when he feels a bit sensitive and wants to indulge in physical intimacy 
the kisses suddenly become too long, steamy and almost burning. you can feel capitano’s hardness accidentally press against you, and you move your body closer to feel his firmness more, which makes the both of you very aware of your physical needs before he finally acknowledges “we haven’t done it for a while, and i want you. badly.” 
Dainsleif
when he wants sex he will be around you the whole day. he will be clingy, sticky and super touchy which amazes you, coz dainsleif is generally super closed
he will wait for you like a loyal man until you finish you work and be completely free for the night. he will chat with you during breaks and might even attempt into dirty talk for once. dainsleif is very good at controlling his impulses but you are his forbidden fruit which he wants to savour immensely, so he will probably not just sit iddly waiting until you somehow read his mind and invite him in
when he is horny, he dresses amazingly. his suits for dates that request continuation in the bedroom are simply delicious. you might want to contact is tailor because you’re astonished by your boyfriend’s style and you wanna match him
he will slowly stand behind your back and run his hands over your waist, pulling you closer will he devours your neck. his fingers will roam over your evening dress until their reach your chest and touch you intimately. that’s his way of telling you he wants to have sex with you
Alhaitham
when he has needs, it’s not like you will learn about it right away. alhaitham himself is not too sure whether what’s happening to him, so he’ll first give it an overthinking. first waking up with a hard-on, then spending the whole day with the same turn on because of how you looked in a video call during your break time… his mind is full of messy thoughts and his body is craving something 
he will try to seduce you different ways. his most common one is coming out of the bathroom with only a bath towel covering his groin, and his hair soaking so sexily while his eyes remain cold and detached. the sight of him gives you naughty ideas and you feel yourself aroused, that’s for sure
the other seductive method will be Alhaitham spilling his coffee on his trousers and waiting for you to help him out. he is very sly when it comes to getting what he wants while staying subtle
if the both of you are in the bed, he will start moving closer to you, inch by inch, while holding a book in his hand like an undercover for his urgent needs. in the meantime if you accept his invitation, he ends up in close proximity with you, the closeness that is deemed most intimate, and you start feeling his stiff body pressing against you
Baizhu
usually you are the one who initiates any intimate activity between you two, but if baizhu is suddenly horny, maan it’s going to be a show. he is very silly when it comes to his love language when he wants it. he thinks that his oddly repetitive smiles that seem sticked to his face are not suspicious at all. when baizhu is horny he smiles a lot to you, which of course raises suspicions though he thinks he is entirely innocent 
he will suggestively graze his fingers over your body when you two bump into each other, and his fingertips will always linger on your waist (that gives you goosebumps and make you suddenly feel hot)
he will discuss irrelevant things like weather or even complain about his customers, intricately avoiding the main subject - his hard on
once you learn about his hard on (his coat doesn't do well keeping it hidden) you realise the reason to the whole back and forth game between you. you discuss it in private when no one listens and since baizhu is the one giving away his spicy mood, you kindly give him control saying that he is in charge tonight because you’re curious what his horny ass was thinking about in his wet dreams
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n0tamused · 6 months ago
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Jiyaaaan request coming your way~
While training his soldiers, one of them accidentally calls him 'Dad'. This leads to the reader teasing them but Jiyan teases back by calling them 'Mom' (or the gender neutral for it?)
(Was reading tv tropes and Jiyan had the 'A Father to his Men' tropes in his character tab lol)
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A/n: Anon this request was so sweet, thank you sm for sending it in! Jiyan the father of an army fr.. I do hope I executed it well. Enjoy!
Content: Jiyan x F!Reader, fluff and playful stuff, nothing more
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The morning sun had long since shifted its axis towards the center of the sky, blazing down through cotton clouds that sailed the azure skies. Below them, in the open fields, west of the main base cacophony sounded, consisting of commands, groans and other sounds of effort as the Midnight Ranger performed their training. And today Jiyan had come to overlook the session himself, although it wouldn’t be the first time. He was often so preoccupied with tasks at the front lines that he didn’t have the time to be leading drills too frequently, but when he did get the chance to do so he would take it. While it wasn’t a full reprieve from the battle, it was still a stark contrast to the grotesque and twisted fates he’d see daily on the battlefield.
Jiyan was noticeably more disheveled by the end, hair messy and hanging in strands and clinging to his sweaty forehead, hands on his hips as his voice rose to meet all ears present. You have just been passing by, helping carry supplies that just came in, and loading old and empty boxes back to be refilled in the city. For once there was no rush that would make your legs ache or your lungs hurt, allowing you all the precious time to bask in the views, the soft chatter and, of course, your dear lover.
The sun caught his figure and formed a golden aura around him, his skin glistening, and you couldn’t help but take a seat at one of many big boxes at the side of the training grounds after you had finished your task. In passing you caught a few looks, and a few smiles of the soldiers you knew from before. They looked much  more lively, despite the rigorous training they just went through. It made your heart warm seeing them in better spirits, wishing nothing more than to see them prevail and be happy. And just as you had recognized a bunch of familiar faces did Jiyan conclude his small speech, about to dismiss everyone with advice of rest hanging on every word. He had spotted you from the start, when you were going by with supplies in arms and soon he’d have a chance to speak to you too, he thought.
“General Jiyan! General Jiyan, a word or two- if I may?” 
It was a voice of one of the new recruits, Jiyan noted as he gazed at the face of the youth, a boy of twenty or so years by the looks of it, and eyes full of curiosity and admiration. He had come up to Jiyan just as he had turned towards you, prompting him to stay rooted in his spot a little longer. A few more young rangers came up behind the recruit, sharing the same curiosity but also being aware of whatever the recruit had on his mind.
“Yes? Is there something you need?” Jiyan questioned, looking at the young man. From his peripheral vision he spotted you moving down from the boxes and joining his side, staying quiet after a short word of greeting towards his Rangers, but your presence felt like a cool breeze under this sun, and he appreciated it all the more.
“I just wanted to say how great today’s training session was, we learned so much more than we did with our drill sergeant” he praised, smiling up at Jiyan all the while, “And I just wanted to ask whether or not you’ll be leading our training session tomorrow as well? Or any other day that is, we would really benefit from your teaching. I mean, you've seen it all for yourself at the front lines!"
The other few with him nodded along, prompting a small smile of pride to form on your face from seeing their fascination with Jiyan. To them he was everything they aspired to be - strong, enduring, tough but not lacking kindness or knowledge. There were times where they were scared to approach him, not knowing how he’d react to their questions, but from observing his interactions with others they warmed up to the idea and plucked all their courage. 
A polite smile curled up on Jiyan’s face as he regarded the youth with gentle golden eyes. His presence as the drill sergeant today wasn’t due to his availability, but a simple coincidence and necessity to fill the shoes of their drill sergeant that had been injured due to Tacet Discords, and Jiyan just happened to be able to be there. “Ah, you have my thanks, rangers. If a replacement for your drill sergeant does not arrive tomorrow and I am not required to be at the front lines, then I will be leading your training tomorrow as well” he told them, which pleased them greatly to hear.  “Although I’m sure Sargent Jin’xi has much more to teach you, something much more important for your sound development in this profession. You cannot take his method lightly. He has seen everything I have, as well. His knowledge is as valuable to your growth, and even more so than mine. You need the good foundation he can give you” He was aware of how confusing or hard it could be to listen to Jin’xi, as the sergeant had quite the eye for details and slow progress in lessons due to his meticulous nature - but that also made him all the better for his station. He was observant and could pluck out bad behavior and mistakes like weeds, and that is better to be done here, than in the middle of battle.
“We know, general, but sergeant Jin’xi is just so hard on us.. sometimes it really seems like he has no limit” one of the women standing behind voiced, earning a look from Jiyan that spoke of his understanding but also his disagreement with the subtle message they were trying to send - please, replace sergeant Jin’xi, or, save us.
“Yeah! One time I accidentally mixed up the weapons in the storage room and he had me do everything on my own again, saying how such mistakes can’t happen on the front lines, how it all means life or death” the first young man said, brushing his fingers through his hair and sighing. “I understand it, but we just got here..” he added and looked at his comrades. 
What was supposed to be a short chit-chat turned swiftly into a gossip galore about Jin’xi. Had Jiyan been any different from the man he was currently, he would’ve scolded them, taken offense at how they spoke about his colleague, but he was in their shoes once, always on edge around the higher ups, and he wished not to bring that same unease to them. He didn’t fail to remind them to not speak like this in front of everyone, and to respect sergeant Jin’xi when he does eventually return, and they gave him their word.
The first young man that approached looked at Jiyan after their discussion, both hands on his hips and looking more relaxed. “We won’t forget that, I promise on my last name! Still, we appreciate your kindness, and one more thing dad- I MEAN- GENERAL!” His entire face crumbled into a look of terror, and all eyes of the group shot to him, looks of surprise and amusement appearing before several of them erupted into laughter after taking a wary glance at Jiyan - who was not offended.
“General Jiyan! Oh god- I apologize, general, I don’t know where that came from-” he stammered, shaking his head and his hands, face flushed from sheer embarrassment. More choked words tumbled out of his mouth, desperate to excuse himself and forget about this. 
Jiyan can’t help but chuckle, the corners of his lips twitching in a failed attempt to hold back his smile. “At ease, recruit. You have not done any crime” he nods at the other, his eyes softening and not showing any sign that he’s about to dish out some punishment - that’d be ridiculous. 
You can’t help but crack a laugh too, covering your lips with your hand as to stifle the sound, but your mirth was evident in your eyes. “Have I missed a chapter? I didn’t know you had kids, general Jiyan” you teased, earning a few shocked but heavily amused looks from the group. Giggles erupted once more, all stifled as they waited for Jiyan to respond to the quip.
Jiyan turns his head to look at you, his eyes boring into yours and questioning your intentions - you can read the thoughts going through your head and your smile only widens in a silent call to a challenge of wits. He didn’t expect you to say something like that, but he could only huff, hiding his amusement under an abrupt guise of confusion.
“Kids?.. Why, I had hoped you’d recognize your own kids, Miss (L/N)” he shot back instantly, making your jaw drop at his rebuttal, a gasp flying past your mouth. “General” you said, accusations plenty heard in your tone as the atmosphere melted into one of jest and play.
Many eyes flickered between you and him, taking in the easy way you conversed with one another.
“Yes? What’s the surprise for? The recruits look up to you too, if you fail to notice. You can confirm with them right now” he is shifting the spotlight to you, and the recruits are quick to jump in too. “It is right, miss. Personally I haven’t been around you for long, no longer than I interacted with the General, but you two are alike, you treat us new ones with a firm but kind hand” a young woman said, smiling at you, and you feel your heart climb into your throat. 
“Can we really be surprised, they’re always together too-” "Aren't they married?" Whispering is heard amidst the group, and Jiyan looks amidst the faces to catch the one that said that but fails to do so, or refuses to weed out the individuals, and his eyes go back to you to catch your response. It’d be a lie to say your relationship with him was a secret, everyone knew there was something deeper between the two of you, something you didn’t show in public due to the war and status, but it was undeniably there. Still, hearing it loud and clear like this was like a splash of cold water. Despite their chatter, the group remained respectful, sweet in their musings.
“Ah, quiet, I do not want to hear it. This is about you, General”
“Ah, don’t run from it now. You’re the one that started this” he commented, rolling his eyes as he folded his arms over his chest. “Anyway, you’re all dismissed. I have a word with.. mother over here. Off you all go. I will see you all in the morning for another training drill. Get some rest” he speaks to the group, gazing upon their faces, only to see how they looked at him with some sort of childhood wonder, and that’s when he realized he must be flushed too. A sheepish smile bloomed on his face. 
“Alright! Awesome-” “Yes, sir!"
“Have a good day, General! And you too, Miss!” 
He watched them leave, bidding them all farewell, and when he turned to face you again he saw you pinching the bridge of your nose, hiding away the biggest smile of the day, the apples of your cheeks redder than before. The Midnight Rangers were undeniably close in connection, having spent so many nights and days huddled together for warmth or laughs or protection, and this small exchange only warmed Jiyan’s heart, to witness how positively they felt around him - and you. 
“Didn’t think we’d become parents so soon. Have we gotten that old already?” Jiyan commented, tone softer in a way he only addressed you when you were alone, and there was no one near the training grounds to hear you.
“Oh, shut up, Jiyan-” you playfully snapped, biting your lip as you looked up at him, stifling a giggle. “You are unbelievable!”
“Hm? Did you expect me to stay quiet today or ignore your quips?” he smiled bigger and you have to admire the little dimples in his cheeks as the smile reaches his eyes, making them squint at you softly.
“I don’t know what I expected, but your response was certainly the last thing I expected” you replied and shook your head, as if that would shake off the redness tinting your skin, imitating him now by crossing your arms. The two of you were looking at each other, wordlessly admiring your red faces while throwing these little quips at one another. 
“Ah.. you’ll get used to it, dearest wife”
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�� n0tamused. Do not repost, translate, edit, and/or copy any of my works. Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated.
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mostlysignssomeportents · 7 months ago
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Even if you think AI search could be good, it won’t be good
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TONIGHT (May 15), I'm in NORTH HOLLYWOOD for a screening of STEPHANIE KELTON'S FINDING THE MONEY; FRIDAY (May 17), I'm at the INTERNET ARCHIVE in SAN FRANCISCO to keynote the 10th anniversary of the AUTHORS ALLIANCE.
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The big news in search this week is that Google is continuing its transition to "AI search" – instead of typing in search terms and getting links to websites, you'll ask Google a question and an AI will compose an answer based on things it finds on the web:
https://blog.google/products/search/generative-ai-google-search-may-2024/
Google bills this as "let Google do the googling for you." Rather than searching the web yourself, you'll delegate this task to Google. Hidden in this pitch is a tacit admission that Google is no longer a convenient or reliable way to retrieve information, drowning as it is in AI-generated spam, poorly labeled ads, and SEO garbage:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/03/keyword-swarming/#site-reputation-abuse
Googling used to be easy: type in a query, get back a screen of highly relevant results. Today, clicking the top links will take you to sites that paid for placement at the top of the screen (rather than the sites that best match your query). Clicking further down will get you scams, AI slop, or bulk-produced SEO nonsense.
AI-powered search promises to fix this, not by making Google search results better, but by having a bot sort through the search results and discard the nonsense that Google will continue to serve up, and summarize the high quality results.
Now, there are plenty of obvious objections to this plan. For starters, why wouldn't Google just make its search results better? Rather than building a LLM for the sole purpose of sorting through the garbage Google is either paid or tricked into serving up, why not just stop serving up garbage? We know that's possible, because other search engines serve really good results by paying for access to Google's back-end and then filtering the results:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/04/teach-me-how-to-shruggie/#kagi
Another obvious objection: why would anyone write the web if the only purpose for doing so is to feed a bot that will summarize what you've written without sending anyone to your webpage? Whether you're a commercial publisher hoping to make money from advertising or subscriptions, or – like me – an open access publisher hoping to change people's minds, why would you invite Google to summarize your work without ever showing it to internet users? Nevermind how unfair that is, think about how implausible it is: if this is the way Google will work in the future, why wouldn't every publisher just block Google's crawler?
A third obvious objection: AI is bad. Not morally bad (though maybe morally bad, too!), but technically bad. It "hallucinates" nonsense answers, including dangerous nonsense. It's a supremely confident liar that can get you killed:
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2023/sep/01/mushroom-pickers-urged-to-avoid-foraging-books-on-amazon-that-appear-to-be-written-by-ai
The promises of AI are grossly oversold, including the promises Google makes, like its claim that its AI had discovered millions of useful new materials. In reality, the number of useful new materials Deepmind had discovered was zero:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/23/maximal-plausibility/#reverse-centaurs
This is true of all of AI's most impressive demos. Often, "AI" turns out to be low-waged human workers in a distant call-center pretending to be robots:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/31/neural-interface-beta-tester/#tailfins
Sometimes, the AI robot dancing on stage turns out to literally be just a person in a robot suit pretending to be a robot:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/29/pay-no-attention/#to-the-little-man-behind-the-curtain
The AI video demos that represent "an existential threat to Hollywood filmmaking" turn out to be so cumbersome as to be practically useless (and vastly inferior to existing production techniques):
https://www.wheresyoured.at/expectations-versus-reality/
But let's take Google at its word. Let's stipulate that:
a) It can't fix search, only add a slop-filtering AI layer on top of it; and
b) The rest of the world will continue to let Google index its pages even if they derive no benefit from doing so; and
c) Google will shortly fix its AI, and all the lies about AI capabilities will be revealed to be premature truths that are finally realized.
AI search is still a bad idea. Because beyond all the obvious reasons that AI search is a terrible idea, there's a subtle – and incurable – defect in this plan: AI search – even excellent AI search – makes it far too easy for Google to cheat us, and Google can't stop cheating us.
Remember: enshittification isn't the result of worse people running tech companies today than in the years when tech services were good and useful. Rather, enshittification is rooted in the collapse of constraints that used to prevent those same people from making their services worse in service to increasing their profit margins:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/26/glitchbread/#electronic-shelf-tags
These companies always had the capacity to siphon value away from business customers (like publishers) and end-users (like searchers). That comes with the territory: digital businesses can alter their "business logic" from instant to instant, and for each user, allowing them to change payouts, prices and ranking. I call this "twiddling": turning the knobs on the system's back-end to make sure the house always wins:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/19/twiddler/
What changed wasn't the character of the leaders of these businesses, nor their capacity to cheat us. What changed was the consequences for cheating. When the tech companies merged to monopoly, they ceased to fear losing your business to a competitor.
Google's 90% search market share was attained by bribing everyone who operates a service or platform where you might encounter a search box to connect that box to Google. Spending tens of billions of dollars every year to make sure no one ever encounters a non-Google search is a cheaper way to retain your business than making sure Google is the very best search engine:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/21/im-feeling-unlucky/#not-up-to-the-task
Competition was once a threat to Google; for years, its mantra was "competition is a click away." Today, competition is all but nonexistent.
Then the surveillance business consolidated into a small number of firms. Two companies dominate the commercial surveillance industry: Google and Meta, and they collude to rig the market:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jedi_Blue
That consolidation inevitably leads to regulatory capture: shorn of competitive pressure, the companies that dominate the sector can converge on a single message to policymakers and use their monopoly profits to turn that message into policy:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/06/05/regulatory-capture/
This is why Google doesn't have to worry about privacy laws. They've successfully prevented the passage of a US federal consumer privacy law. The last time the US passed a federal consumer privacy law was in 1988. It's a law that bans video store clerks from telling the newspapers which VHS cassettes you rented:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Video_Privacy_Protection_Act
In Europe, Google's vast profits lets it fly an Irish flag of convenience, thus taking advantage of Ireland's tolerance for tax evasion and violations of European privacy law:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/05/15/finnegans-snooze/#dirty-old-town
Google doesn't fear competition, it doesn't fear regulation, and it also doesn't fear rival technologies. Google and its fellow Big Tech cartel members have expanded IP law to allow it to prevent third parties from reverse-engineer, hacking, or scraping its services. Google doesn't have to worry about ad-blocking, tracker blocking, or scrapers that filter out Google's lucrative, low-quality results:
https://locusmag.com/2020/09/cory-doctorow-ip/
Google doesn't fear competition, it doesn't fear regulation, it doesn't fear rival technology and it doesn't fear its workers. Google's workforce once enjoyed enormous sway over the company's direction, thanks to their scarcity and market power. But Google has outgrown its dependence on its workers, and lays them off in vast numbers, even as it increases its profits and pisses away tens of billions on stock buybacks:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/11/25/moral-injury/#enshittification
Google is fearless. It doesn't fear losing your business, or being punished by regulators, or being mired in guerrilla warfare with rival engineers. It certainly doesn't fear its workers.
Making search worse is good for Google. Reducing search quality increases the number of queries, and thus ads, that each user must make to find their answers:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/24/naming-names/#prabhakar-raghavan
If Google can make things worse for searchers without losing their business, it can make more money for itself. Without the discipline of markets, regulators, tech or workers, it has no impediment to transferring value from searchers and publishers to itself.
Which brings me back to AI search. When Google substitutes its own summaries for links to pages, it creates innumerable opportunities to charge publishers for preferential placement in those summaries.
This is true of any algorithmic feed: while such feeds are important – even vital – for making sense of huge amounts of information, they can also be used to play a high-speed shell-game that makes suckers out of the rest of us:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/11/for-you/#the-algorithm-tm
When you trust someone to summarize the truth for you, you become terribly vulnerable to their self-serving lies. In an ideal world, these intermediaries would be "fiduciaries," with a solemn (and legally binding) duty to put your interests ahead of their own:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/07/treacherous-computing/#rewilding-the-internet
But Google is clear that its first duty is to its shareholders: not to publishers, not to searchers, not to "partners" or employees.
AI search makes cheating so easy, and Google cheats so much. Indeed, the defects in AI give Google a readymade excuse for any apparent self-dealing: "we didn't tell you a lie because someone paid us to (for example, to recommend a product, or a hotel room, or a political point of view). Sure, they did pay us, but that was just an AI 'hallucination.'"
The existence of well-known AI hallucinations creates a zone of plausible deniability for even more enshittification of Google search. As Madeleine Clare Elish writes, AI serves as a "moral crumple zone":
https://estsjournal.org/index.php/ests/article/view/260
That's why, even if you're willing to believe that Google could make a great AI-based search, we can nevertheless be certain that they won't.
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If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/15/they-trust-me-dumb-fucks/#ai-search
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Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg
CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en
--
djhughman https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Modular_synthesizer_-_%22Control_Voltage%22_electronic_music_shop_in_Portland_OR_-_School_Photos_PCC_%282015-05-23_12.43.01_by_djhughman%29.jpg
CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/deed.en
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lowkeyrobin · 4 months ago
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(i’m not sure if your requests are open so i’m sorry if they aren’t and i’m sending this in 😭)
Can I request Five with a reader that’s always really energetic and yaps a lot but something happens between them and Reader gets distant?? 🫶
ooo yeah sure!! ; and my requests are on dw! when they're closed I remove my inbox in general just to avoid it and to prevent ppl who don't look at the big bold words in my bio lol ; but yeah, thank you for requesting! hope you enjoy! ; also I made this in hc format cause I was NOT trying to write all that
FIVE HARGREEVES ; yapparappa
summary ; youre really energetic and talkative, but once a fight breaks, you become distant and quiet
warnings ; language
disclaimers ; don't ask ab the title, I was just thinking parappa the rapper and yeah idk
word count ; 278
masterlist
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he's a quiet guy
but he'll happily listen to your yapping
you surprisingly teach him a lot
and he finds it comforting
like classical music to Reginald, he wouldn't be able to survive without you
but after a fight (about Marcus / Sparrow Academy & him running off with Klaus and not being around for the Kugelblitz) you'd started to avoid him
he said some very rude things
those things being along the lines of how he wished he never met you, how annoying you are, how much he can't stand you, etc
so you obviously stormed off all angry at each other
but you'd become completely distant while he was trying to fix the world again
like you didn't come down for an early morning coffee with him like you usually did
nor did you rant about anything to him later that night or the ones following
if he was even around, you'd move away and not even look at him
like he hadn't heard you speak for DAYS
that's never happened before
like you're always rambling about something or asking him questions about shit, etc
he started to feel bad when Klaus started yelling at him about it
"this is childish! you're stuck in a child's body trying to prove you're a man and you're hurting your love!" he fake cries. "they could get kugelblitz'ed and their last memories of you would be you yelling at them, five"
he groans, deciding he'll go apologize to you
so he apologizes, expecting one from you as well
and you deliver
he's up front and honest that he doesn't find your rambling annoying
if anything its comforting for him
aweee happy ending lol
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trophyposting · 9 months ago
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the reason trophy isn't a well-rounded character and hasn't improved is specifically because he got voted out so early. he never had a chance to change. and even though he's one of the characters who's gotten the most content in shorts and comics, he doesn't really get a chance to change for the better there, either. fixing trophy is something that would require a dedicated arc, which is something you just can't do in a comic or short.
he is an asshole and a "manipulative bastard" in season 2, and i wouldn't argue that. but let's at least not pretend he's some mastermind with a grand plan or something (like taco, maybe). he's not a supervillain, he just kind of sucks. people like to play up his assholeishness in fan content and in the way they talk about him, and it can end up distorting your perception of what he's actually like (still not that great but, yk)
(also i'd like to point out that liking a character who sucks and has done bad things doesn't necessarily equate to defending their actions. and enjoying seeing those actions on a screen doesn't necessarily equate to liking them in real life or even thinking they're at all morally correct. i know you weren't necessarily saying that anon, or anybody else who dislikes trophy for that matter, but i thought it was important to lay out)
and i know i said that trophy didn’t get much of a chance to change, but there's still a case to be made that he at least changed a little bit post- season 2, or even just post-elimination. an example i like to point to when people claim trophy is a violent bastard for no reason, 24/7, is in episode 14 of season 2, when fan bumps into him twice. even though fan knocks two things he was carrying out of his hands, trophy doesn't get aggressive, or even angry. his reaction is essentially "oh no :(" (link to this scene here if you want to see it for yourself)
another example of trophy being "better" than he was in season 2 is in his episode of fan's fantastic features. he makes an effort to empathize with box (who he's not even completely sold on the idea of him being alive), which he didn't even have to do. a big problem of his back in season 2 is that he refused to empathize or sympathize with people, especially knife. when knife broke (twisted? not sure) his ankle or just generally showed distress at being blackmailed, trophy didn't care. but later, trophy empathizes with someone he's not even sure is alive, for something that isn't even his fault (box being unable to talk)
now i know it can seem like i'm pulling at straws here, but the truth is that we just don't have much evidence, one way or the other, for whether trophy's tried to better himself. but, in my opinion, there are small signs that point to yes! admittedly, even if he has changed a little off-screen, there's still the matter of deeper, more internalized stuff he probably still believes (the matter of him thinking knife deserved ridicule for engaging in childish/"girly" activities) that needs to be dealt with. but that's what an arc is for! and he might get one, eventually. but right now i think that, with the small amount of content we have of him, he's changed for the better a fair amount
I hate Trophy.
There! I said it, I hate him and I wish people didn’t defend him so much.
He had potential to improve and change into a better person, yes, but he never did! So why do you still defend him?
He is a manipulative bastard, proven by the fact that he blackmailed Knife into doing his bidding, treating him like a servant rather than an equal to him. And he’s also just an asshole!
I don’t get why people simp for him, either. He isn’t anything special, and he never will be. He got eliminated early on for a reason..
So.. if anyone reading does the stuff I despise, then please tell me avid Trophy fans.. why do you simp for him and/or defend his vile actions?
-🗣️ (Picked that emoji cause I yap a lot)
.
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evilminji · 10 months ago
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You know all those Cults in Gotham?
Bet at least ONE of them could spring for both a Legit Magic User and a Cloning pod.
Because The Wayne's? Hearts of Gold. Long standing pains in the asses. Probably the only thing standing between this gods forsaken wasteland of a city and Their Dark Lord. For GENERATIONS no less!
It's sooooo obnoxious!
So they want to Curse Um dead. Just a good ol fashioned bloodline curse. Destroy um from within, etc. BUT! To do THAT? You kinda need a blood relative to sacrifice!
And Bruce is... well... rather infamously An Orphan With No Biological Kids (at that point).
So? What do you do? Make one, obviously. You send in some of your own on a Holy Mission. Honeypot that playboy! Get us a kid to sacrifice! Our God will reward you etc! But... FFS! What? Are brunettes not your TYPE or something?! Pretty lady! Throwing herself at you!!
TAKE THE BAIT!
But he DOESN'T. Because he's both really used to that behavior, as The Wayne Heir and a False Playboy, AND because? He's fuckin Batman. He can see through your schemes.
Okay.
Okay!
Plan B!
Get us some DNA. We'll CLONE the sucker. That should be doable, right?
........OH COME ON! How?!
Batman: [REDACTED] / Cultists: 0
Fuck it! This is impossible! How are we supposed too... *eyes drift over to the Wayne Family Private Graveyard* .......Idea? Ideeeeaaaa~! Someone get us a shovel!
So they, cultist bastards that they are? Fuckin rob a grave for some DNA.
OBVIOUSLY though, it can't be one of the more RECENT graves! He probably VISITS those! Watches them! No we gotta be SNEAKY! Get one a bit further back! Mwahahahaha! We're so brilliant! Our God is gonna give us SUCH a Good Grade in follower!
A thing that is both REAL and possible to achieve!
So, while a Weirdly FURIOUS Batman? Is just... VIOLENTLY breaking ALL of their bones? Cultist 17 is furiously digging like his life depends on it. Either somebody snitched or Batman was hunting them down! Either way?
Gotta! Get! That! DNA!!! *digs faster*
Ah HA! Got it!
Fucking SCATTER! Run you fools, RUN!!! *everyone bolts*
And AT LAST! They have it! Wayne DNA! Now? Pop that sucker into the machine and make us a baby! Too sacrifice! *relieved noises* Man, that was hard work you guys. But we DID it!
Except??
Theoretical Babies? And "Real, slowly forming in front of me and becoming a human child" type babies? VERY DIFFERENT psychologically. It's ONE thing to sacrifice a HYPOTHETICAL baby... but when you're the guy running and monitoring the Cloning machine? Watching it slowly form and come together into... into a CHILD?
You start asking questions of yourself. Of God.
Of what, EXACTLY, you are willing to do.
What lines you find yourself unwilling to cross.
And yeah, your life was SHIT before the cult. Yeah, you were alone. Adrift. Without purpose. Angry at the world for all of its ugliness and failings. But... sitting, alone, in a dark room? Nothing but the steady hum of machines and the cool light of that pod? You are left with nothing but time... and your thoughts.
And the baby.
The one... the one YOU made.
Almost... he's almost like a son, in a way. Your son. Floating there, innocent and unknowing. Destined to be born, only to die painfully, for a cause he could not even begin to understand. Because he's too young. Too small. Just... just a baby.
The baby YOU made.
Doubt seeps in like mist. Creeping into the cracks forming in your faith. Surely there's another way, right? Why not save up for a better magician? Or... or hire a hitman? Why involve a child? Surely... surely your God would not WANT this, right? Or if He did! Surely, he would want the boy to be able to CHOOSE, right? A noble sacrifice, for the cause?
The pressure builds. Batman is tearing the city APART looking for your fellow Believers. Leadership is pressuring you to get "It" ready all ready.
He's not an "it".
They are dismissing your questions. Threatening and posturing, as you grapple with your faith. Where? Where is the COMMUNITY that you joined? The camaraderie? Every day, Believers are being torn down. The faith has lost so many!
How can this be WORTH it?
Your faith is slowly, cruelly, strangled in your chest. A death, by ten thousand silences, and ten thousand more cruelties.
Your son is ready.
You do not tell them.
The Clone of Bruce Wayne's great-grandfather is small, but healthy, in your arms. A tiny warm body, with a strong beating little heart. You call the police. Leave your phone, call running, on the desk. No one thinks to stop you, as you calmly walk out the back door.
Why would they doubt?
You are Faithful.
You drive. Pray to a God you have lost faith in, beg forgiveness for what you do now. Your beat up old junker of a car makes decent time, as you leave Gotham. Your son, asleep in a carefully made nest of blankets, on the seat next to you. You drive. You keep driving.
Past towns.
Past cities.
Out of the state.
Stopping only to feed your son and fuel your car. You... you can not bring yourself to care about what will happen to you now. You know they will find you. Know this is the end. But something ancient burns in your chest. A caring you never thought was REAL.
You are afraid.
But you will not let them harm your son.
Finally, a town. Far from Gotham. Quite and cheerful. It calls to you.
Here. It... it has to be here.
You find the hospital. Tears choking you. There is a place to drop of children. You've seen them before. How strange, that now you stand before it and HURT. Your arms not listening to your command. You... you have to do this. You HAVE too.
He is just a baby.
He is your son.
You have to keep him safe. And... and that can not be with you.
You gently put your baby boy into the drop off. Press the buzzer. And then? You make yourself walk away.
Get back in your car, and drive. The gun in your glove box will insure they can never pry from you, what you have done. Where he is. He is safe now. He has to be. You... you did your job. As his father. You made sure he was safe.
You can barely see the road, through your tears.
You take your secrets to the grave.
And Danny? He grows up. Is adopted young and never knows different. Both a Fenton and a Wayne. Knowing only one of these, to be his. But... that Wayne? Was a damn fine man. A pillar of his community and a champion of the people.
Got tossed more then a few blessings, in his life.
They weren't the STRONGEST. But they added up. And more importantly? Were hardly the refined magics of the more powerful. They were cast onto "Him". By blood and bone, more often then not. Which was all well and good!
When there was only ONE of "Him".
Cloning technology did not exsist. So why would you word carefully against it? Danny becomes a VERY lucky boy. Survives many things he should not. In fact, the kindness and hard work of his original? Gifted back in magically powered well wishes? By this, he survives something NO ONE could possibly expect him too.
It saves his life.
His template would be quite pleased, knowing that. That his life of good deeds, saved the life of the child he never got a chance to meet. That it protected his children, from even beyond death.
And in Gotham? At long, long last. The program Bruce made in his helplessness and despair, to search EVERY child until the child made of his bloodline was found? Spits out a match.
A Watchtower engineer.
Daniel J. Fenton.
@hdgnj @hypewinter @lolottes @babbling-babull @nerdpoe @mutable-manifestation
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ode2cheol · 1 year ago
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WAYS WE CAN HELP PALESTINE:
as of 9am today, 8131 palestinians were killed, 20438 are injured and 1.4 million have been displaced. it’s important for all of us to help palestine in as many ways as we can.
i also cannot stress how much just spreading awareness in general can help. staying silent because of your discomfort is not an excuse to sit by while a genocide takes place. when we learn about these events in history we often think “how was this allowed to happen?” but that’s exactly what’s happening now and it’s our responsibility to not sit by and let an entire country be wiped out. i will continue adding more ways to help to this post and i’d really appreciate it if anyone can spread this as much as possible.
it’s important to get educated on everything going on in palestine right now, here are some sources that could help!
decolonize palestine - made by two palestinians, answers a lot of questions regarding everything right now (including debunking a lot of myths from biased news stations) and provides a lot of historical context.
list of documentaries to watch if you want to gain further knowledge
list of accounts to follow on twitter that can also provide information
linktree with information
you can also donate to organisations! even if you can’t donate tons of money, you can help by spreading these links so others can also try to donate!
red crescent
PCRF
MAP
doctors w/o borders
palestinian social fund
palestinian in pain launch good
this website is free and uses ad revenue for donations, all you need to do is click it once daily!
some more places you can donate to and some more
boycotting will also help!! also some of the kpop idols we stan have brand deals with ones that support 🇮🇱 so please let’s not interact with their posts with those brands
list from BDS of companies to boycott
signing petitions!
write to representatives and demand they retract their support of 🇮🇱
ways to contact local governments about helping palestine
if you’re in the uk here’s a link to contact your local MP
change org ceasefire petition
Text "CEASEFIRE" to 51905 if you live in America. The link provided leads you to a page to sign and call for a ceasefire once the goal is met. They are so close to meeting its goal!!
here's a link that lets you send a letter directly to your state representatives
here are some threads that will also give you ways to help.
thread of things we can do to help palestine
HOW TO HELP PALESTINE!! resources and links to other threads on how to donate and spread awareness of what's happening in palestine currently!!! a thread 🧵
here’s what we know, and links to donate to help aid palestinians, a thread:
Here is a list of list of resources and people you can follow to educate yourself on what’s going on in Palestine RIGHT NOW🇵🇸
Ways US, Canada, and UK residents can reach out to their state representatives and MPs to call for ceasefire in Gaza:
if there are any more sources that you would like me to add pls send me an ask or dm me !!
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multi-kpop-fanfics · 1 year ago
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Cats and Coffee for Two
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pairing: photgrapher/barista!Wonwoo x barista fem!reader (ft. other sebongs)
genre: fluff, comedy, coworkers to lovers!AU, mutual pining, smut - minors dni.
warnings: mentions of food, alcohol and cat hairs, mentions of headaches and insecurities
smut warnings: oral sex (f rec), unprotected sex (contraception is mentioned but wrap it), creampie, praise, use of petnames, body worship, semi-public sex, manhandling, marking, making out, aftercare
word count: 12.2k
summary: Job hunting is a tough sport and Wonwoo has experienced it to its core. One fine autumn day comes where he's finally free from the shackles of unemployment, but he will soon find himself in the shackles of coffee, tea and cat hairs, But most importantly, he will have to share these shackles with you.
Author's note: this is my entry for the fall-ing for you collab hosted by @svthub! another long piece written by yours truly lmao
p.s.: huge thank you to @bitchlessdino, @gyuwoncheol, @wongyuseokie, @onlymingyus, @wonwussy, @horanghater and @shuadotcom for helping me out with the fic in more ways than one💕
©multi-kpop-fanfics, 2023. No reposting allowed. No translations allowed without permission.
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“....We received your CV and cover letter. While your educational details are impressive, the lack of working experience does not make you a suitable candidate for the work position in our company. 
We thank you for your time and effort, and we wish you the best of luck.”
“Well fuck off, autogenerated e-mail response.” Wonwoo grumbles and sends the mail straight to the trash bin with an annoyed huff.
Another job opportunity flushed down the drain, to the point where another headache punches its way into his skull. 
He’s tired. He’s tired, drained and disappointed as fuck. He knew job hunting is a tough sport, but he didn’t expect to be kicked to the curb for such a long time. He was hoping to get a chance for an interview, but not even that? 
It makes him wonder if the years he spent in college were worth it after all. 
Wonwoo’s headache gets stronger, to the point he’s struggling to keep his eyes open. He closes his laptop and gets up from his seat, making a beeline to the cupboard where he stores his medical supplies.
He swallows a painkiller, followed by a generous gulp of water from a bottle, hoping it will soothe the pain soon enough.
He walks over to the couch, plopping down unceremoniously. His energy levels have dropped to absolute zero and the maroon colored couch pillow suddenly seems like a gift sent by the Heavens. He takes off his glasses and lays his head on the pillow, eyes closing shut within a few seconds.
Two hours later, his sweet slumber is disrupted by the familiar ringtone of his phone, but the noise doesn’t make him any less terrified. 
“H-Hello?”
“Hi loser, it’s me, your professional emotional and mental support!” A bright voice echoes from the other end of the line.
Wonwoo checks the ID of the caller and groans when he sees Seokmin’s name.
“What is wrong with you, Seokmin?”
“Bold of you to ask that question.”
“I am serious, Seok. Haven’t you heard of afternoon naps?”
“Dude, it’s eight o’clock.”
Wonwoo checks his watch and sighs in disappointment. “Fuck, I overslept, damnit.”
“Just how long were you asleep for?”
“Doesn’t matter anymore. Why did you call me?”
“Oh I don’t know, because you’re my friend and I want to check up on you because you’ve been in a slump lately?”
“Damn, way to call me out, I guess.”
“If I don’t call you out, then who will?!”
“....Fair point.”
“Anyways, I’m planning to grab some drinks with Minghao in an hour.”
“Oh nice, hope you have fun.”
“And you’re coming with us.”
“No.”
“Oh come on! It won’t be anything wild, just the three of us drinking some alcohol!” Seokmin whines. “Please? Just this once?”
Wonwoo ponders over his friend’s request and grumbles from his end.
“Fine, if it means to make you hop off my ass, I guess.”
“What ass?”
“You know what, I changed my mi-”
“I’m just kidding!”
“You better be.”
“Okay okay, no need to get your claws out!” 
“Anyways, I’ll see you guys in an hour.” 
“Nice! Make sure to shower before getting out of the house.”
“Fuck you, Seokmin.”
Wonwoo ends the phone call and gets up from the couch, stretching his arms above his head. He takes a whiff from his shirt and he scrunches his eyes in disappointment.
“He’s right, I should take a shower.”
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Wonwoo is glad he accepted Seokmin’s invitation, because he had no idea how much he needed this. Not that he would ever admit it.
“You seem less tense than earlier.” Minghao comments.
“It’s all thanks to the alcohol.” 
“And the good company!” Seokmin butts in with his soju glass. “It’s okay to admit I was right.”
“And let it get to your head? No thank you.”
“Wonwoo is right, it will get to your head.” 
“I hate you both!” Seokmin whines and downs his shot.
“Now that’s a lie and you know it.” The younger man deadpans.
Wonwoo watches the bickering between his friends, the rim of the soju glass resting on his bottom lip. But his mind is wicked enough to slip back into his own worries, his face frowning once more.
“Wonwoo? Are you okay?”
Minghao’s voice snaps him out of his trance.
“Hm? Yeah, all good.”
“Buddy, with all due respect, you were looking like your pet cat died or something.” Seokmin narrows his eyes.
“Fuck off, Salem is perfectly fine!” Wonwoo shivers.
“Are you still worried about finding a job?” Minghao asks, hitting the nail on the head.
“Well, how can I not be? I have been struggling ever since I graduated and all I’ve managed to do is photoshoots for stupid influencers!”
He realizes his voice was louder than it was supposed to be, judging from the side-eyeing glares he earned from other customers.
“Damn, you really had to stoop so low?” Seokmin scratches his head.
“Money makes the world go around, or something like that.”
“Then what’s the problem?” Minghao asks again.
“I don’t have enough work experience, let alone serious one, which means my CV doesn’t look very professional right now.”
“Hmm….”
“What?”
“I may have a solution to your problem.”
Wonwoo’s eyes go wide, his irises filling with hope.
“Do you remember Joshua? From the Social Relations department?”
“Yeah, I do.”
“He’s currently working at SVT Cat Cafe, he manages the paperwork and stuff. He could put in a few words for you, if you don’t mind.” Minghao sips the last of his soju.
“You should take the offer, Wonwoo! The cafe is really cute and you will love the kitties!” Seokmin grins excitedly.
“It’s…It sounds really good, to be honest. Almost too good to be true.” Wonwoo lets out a breath he was holding all this time.
“You can always check out their website and send your CV in their email address. They are still hiring people, so it’s a good chance.” 
“Hao, I don’t know what to say, seriously.” Wonwoo laughs nervously.
“People usually say thank you.” Seokmin jokes.
“One more word and I’ll shove the entire soju bottle in your mouth, I swear.”
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The view through the window is nothing short of idyllic, almost like the aesthetic images you see on Pinterest and Instagram. Maple leaves are dancing to the rhythm of the November winds, adding color to the dull concrete of the pavement, even if you know they won’t stay there for long.
You can’t say you’ve gotten used to the chilly weather, especially after your late vacation in Greece - it’s always too warm there, as you were warned beforehand. But you’re definitely glad you can enjoy a hot cup of coffee with cinnamon and chocolate sprinkles before the opening.
You hear tiny meows behind the mahogany counter and you walk in front of it, letting out a sigh when you pinpoint the source of the noises.
“Tofu, I swear to God.” You put the cup down and pick the white kitty in your arms. “I know you like roaming around but your cat hairs are invisible and I don’t want them in the beverages.”
The feline just tilts her head sideways and purrs in your arms, her green eyes staring at you, as if she is the most innocent creature in the universe (she is, most of the time).
“Your boba eyes aren’t working on me, missy. I know your true nature.”
Tofu responds with another meow, as if she’s asking you ‘who, me?’.
You go back and forth with the cat’s meows and purrs, utterly unaware of the presence of two men just a few feet away.
“Does that happen on a daily basis?” Wonwoo asks with a hushed voice.
“Yeah, with almost every single cat.” Joshua responds. “Although Tofu is her favorite.”
“I think I can see that.” 
You hear a couple of whispers behind you and you turn your attention to the two men.
“Oh, Joshua! You’re early today.” You comment. “And who is the gentleman next to you?”
“U-Uh, hi. I’m Jeon Wonwoo.” The man fixes his glasses nervously.
“Nice to meet you! I’m Y/N.” You stretch your arm, waiting for a handshake. 
“L-Likewise.” Wonwoo hesitantly shakes your hand.
“Wonwoo will be the photographer for our social media accounts and official website, starting today.” Joshua adds.
“Oh, that’s great news!” You exclaim. “I promise you’ll have a wonderful time working here, Wonwoo.”
“I sure hope so.”
“Well, I’m afraid I have to take my leave now, business is calling.” Joshua announces after checking his watch. “Do not worry, Wonwoo. I’m leaving you in great hands. And paws.”
“See you later, Shua!” You bid your coworker farewell.
Tofu walks around Wonwoo’s legs and rubs herself all over him.
“I think she likes you.”
“You think so?” Wonwoo asks as he bends down to pet the cat, a fond smile on his face as the feline leans into his hand.
“She’s pretty picky with people, so seeing her so warm towards someone she has never seen before is pretty much a miracle.” You chuckle.
“Well, I should feel honored then.” He responds with a small smile.
“Would you like to order something? I could fix you a cup before the opening.”
“Um, could I have an iced americano then?”
“Wow, you’re brave.” You laugh in disbelief.
“What makes you say that?”
“You just ordered iced coffee in the middle of autumn. Does your throat have a death wish?” You put a few ice cubes in a plastic cup.
“Force of habit, I guess.” Wonwoo replies.
“That sounded very…moody.”
“Sorry, it wasn’t my intention…” He laces his fingers together and purses his lips together.
“You aren’t quite the extroverted one, are you?” You place the cup with the bitter liquid in front of him.
“Not really.” 
“It’s okay! You will be able to overcome it with time.” You try to reassure him.
“If you say so.” Wonwoo takes a sip of his coffee. “I’ll go check out the rest of the cafe, if you don’t mind.”
“Sure, feel free to explore a bit!” You smile at him while you wrap your apron around your waist.
“The coffee is really good, by the way.” 
“Thank you! It’s my job, after all.”
Wonwoo searches for his wallet in his backpack, but you stop him before he finds it.
“It’s on the house, no need to pay for it.”
“But-”
“Good luck today, Wonwoo.”
“T-Thanks. You too, Y/N.”
He looks at you one last time before he goes to the open space of the cafe to familiarize himself with his surroundings.
The day progresses without any problems - if anything, the regular customers have already started gossiping about Wonwoo, although most of it revolves around his God-like facial features.
You kinda wish you were serving the coffee instead of making it behind the counter. At least you would have been able to see Wonwoo up close in action with his camera. But you can’t say you haven’t been stealing glances through the window that separates the two spaces of the cafe.
“Eyeing the new guy, are we now?” One of your coworkers leans on the counter in an attempt to gossip.
“Oh, shut up, Chan.”
“What? I’m just asking!”
“Define asking?”
“For someone who claims to be the sunshine type in this business, you’re pretty snappy right now.” The ashen-haired man snickers.
“I’m not snappy! It’s rush hour and I’m trying to focus on my job.” You defend yourself.
“It’s rush hour for everyone here, you’re not special, Y/N.”
“Either way, you’re not getting anything out of me, Chan.” You place two porcelain cups filled with hot chocolate. “Now get these to table four.”
“Vibe killer.” Chan grumbles under his breath as he places the cups on the disk.
“I heard that, shortie!” 
“No cupcakes for you tomorrow!” He mocks you before disappearing into the outer space of the cafe.
You let out an exasperated sigh, followed by a short laugh and you return to the coffee machine, checking the orders you have received and start making them one by one.
While the cafe hasn’t been operating for long, you’ve been part of it since day one. You feel glad to be finally putting your barista working license to work and do something that you love dearly - blame your undying love for coffee and cats.
Chan was also one of the first employees who joined the team, but he’s on the service part and he’s damn good at it (even if he did break a couple of glasses on his first week). The regular patrons know him by name and he never fails to make them swoon over with just a single smile of his.
Chan is a sweetheart, but also a little shit when it comes to teasing you. Although he never once overstepped with teasing. But he always goes overboard with the treats he gets you from the bakery across the street. You still remember the six pieces of cinnamon rolls he got you two weeks ago and how persistent he was for you to eat them all (you ate them all eventually).
Late in the afternoon, your shift comes to an end and you hang your apron, starting to pack up your stuff. Wonwoo walks into the main area and starts dismantling his camera to put it back in its box.
“So, how did the first day go?” You attempt to strike conversation.
“It was….interesting, I suppose.” He shrugs.
“You sound a bit tired….”
“My social battery died about halfway through the shift, to be honest.” He admits with a heavy sigh. “At least the cats are sociable enough to let me pet them.”
“I think you should go home and get some rest.” You give him some advice.
“I don’t think rest is going to happen anytime soon, but thanks.” He zips up his bag and throws it over his shoulder. “Goodnight and see you tomorrow, Y/N.” He bids you farewell and disappears through the doors of the cafe.
Shame, he’s cute but so uptight, you think. It’s not like there’s anything else you can do right now, so you leave the cafe, locking it shut and you walk towards the bus station to catch your ride back home.
A while later, you’re laying in your bed under the covers and decide to scroll through your socials for a while before falling asleep. You open Instagram and check your notifications, your eyes zooming on the purple circle around the profile picture of the cat cafe.
You click on it and a smile creeps on your face when you see Wonwoo’s picture on one of the Instagram stories, tagging Wonwoo’s account and welcoming him to the team. Curiosity gets the better of you and you click on the tag, leading you to his personal account. You frown a bit when you notice it’s private, but you don’t hesitate to send him a following request.
You hope he won’t think you’re a creep or something. I mean, he can definitely recognize you from your profile picture, right?
To your luck, a notification pops up on the top part of your screen and you squeal when you realize that Wonwoo has followed you back.
You waste zero time to check the pictures he has posted over the years and you quickly understand that he’s not the type to show off his face. But the one thing that’s prominent in his account is the astronomical amount of breathtaking pictures from the places he has visited throughout his life. You break into a giggling fit when you click on a post with his cat and you read a few comments from his friends, lovingly making fun of his ‘cat dad’ tendencies. Your heart swells when you see more photos of him playing with a black cat and petting him until said cat slaps his hands away.
Now you know why Tofu liked him at first sight.
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One week later.
Today is an off day for you and you plan to sleep until midday. But your boss has other plans.
You want to cuss at everything around you within a radius of ten kilometers when your phone rings and you rub your eyes to forcefully wake yourself up and answer the call.
“Good morning, Boss.” 
“Good morning, Y/N. I’m sorry for calling you so early, but you need to come as soon as you can at the cafe.”
“Why is that? I mean, it’s my day off today.”
“I know, but I wouldn’t call you if it wasn’t an emergency.”
“Did something happen?”
“Yoona just called me from the hospital, she had an accident yesterday.”
“What?!” You nearly jump out of the bed. “Is she okay?!”
“She’s out of harm's way, but her arm has suffered a fracture and she won’t be able to work for the next two months.”
“Oh my God….”
“We really need you here, Y/N.”
“Yes, yes of course. I’ll be there in half an hour.” You say and end the call. 
You grumble and get out of the bed, your feet taking you to the bathroom to wash your face and fix your hair. Once you’re out, you go back to the bedroom and pick a hoodie with jeans to put on.
You walk out of your apartment and fasten your jacket around you, jogging to the bus station to catch your ride to work.
Twenty minutes later, you arrive at the cafe and you’re welcomed with a literal mess in the barista bench and a yelling Chan and a frustrated Wonwoo. 
“This isn’t how you’re supposed to turn it!”
“And what do you know about coffee machines?!”
“All corks are manufactured to fasten towards a certain direction!.”
“You’re just a photographer, not an engineer!”
“And you’re just a waiter, not a barista!”
“Whoa, whoa! Both of you, get away from the machines!” You yell at them and shoo them away to get to work. ��Jesus, what the hell did you do here?!”
“We were just trying to make the orders!” Chan defends himself.
“You could have just told the customers that coffee won’t be served until the barista is here!”
“That’s what I suggested as well, but he said ‘he knows better’.” Wonwoo shrugs.
“Yeah, that’s because I’ve been here longer than you!” The shorter man retorts.
“Sometimes, it’s productive to listen to other people’s ideas, they might help you in ways you could never imagine.” You sigh as your hands fiddle with the machine and check the orders one by one.
“Finally, someone with common sense.” Wonwoo points towards you. “At least some people know how to think in here.” He walks away and picks up his camera again, resuming his initial tasks.
“I can’t believe you took his side!” Chan complains to you.
“I didn’t take his side, our opinions just happened to collide!” 
“Oh my God, you’re so into him, it actually sickens me.” The man fake gags.
“Can you stop bringing that up?! What if he listens?!” You whip your head around and glare at your friend.
“So you admit it! You have a crush on him!”
“Yeah I do. You can get your ‘detective of the year’ honorary badge now.” You groan.
“I- Ugh, whatever.”
“Look, Chan, I wasn’t even supposed to be here today. Please don’t make this any harder than it already is.” 
 Chan lets out a deep breath to calm down as he picks up the serving disk.
“I know, Y/N. I hope the remaining apple pie in the box will lighten up your mood and fill in your empty stomach. It’s freshly baked.” 
“......You idiot.”
“I love you too, work wife.” He flashes you a grin and runs back to the customers.
You take a peek in the pastry box and the aroma of cinnamon and apples hits your nostrils like the early morning sunlight enters a cold room.
Your fingers don’t hesitate to dip in the box and pick a bite from the dessert, putting it in your mouth to eat it. You hum in approval when the sweet warmth envelopes your taste buds, giving you a much needed energy boost.
You return to your work at hand, completely unaware of Wonwoo’s eyes watching you like a hawk, an unreadable expression overcoming his features. The tuxedo cat jumping on the shelf next to his head snaps him out of it, letting out a cranky meow at him.
“What is it, Taro?” He raises his hand to pet her fur.
Taro meows back as she flops down on the surface to stretch herself out for more pets.
“Jealous of not giving you enough attention?”
She meows even louder this time, as if she’s saying yes.
“I’m sorry, your Highness.” Wonwoo ruffles her belly. “A man has to work to get by.”
Taro narrows her eyes, as if she’s doubting his words.
“Okay fine, I was looking at her! What are you gonna do about it?”
The cat raises her front paws in the air and Wonwoo lets out an airy laugh, positioning his camera towards the long-haired feline to capture her in a few poses.
“Hope those pictures will be enough for you to stop blackmailing me.”
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Two weeks later.
God, these double shifts are fucking killing me, you mentally groan while sitting in one of the tables next to the cat trees. But it’s nice working early, since you get to come here and chill with the cats before opening time.
One of the resident cats jumps next to you, rubbing himself on your thigh.
“Good morning to you too, Dino Nugget. Did you sleep well?”
The orange cat jumps in your lap and sits in a loaf position without even asking you.
“Wow sir, it’s not even free real estate.” You laugh and run your hand over his fur.
He turns around and starts pawing at your hand, as if it’s a toy. He then opens his jaw to nibble at your finger, his teeth grazing your skin a bit harsher than usual.
“Ow, dude! That’s my hand, not your chew toy!” You yelp lightly.
You hear the clicking sound of a camera not far away from you and you snap your head to the source of the sound, your eyes falling on Wonwoo.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you-”
“No no, it’s okay! You were just doing your job.” You wave your hand.
“Do you….mind if I sit with you?” He asks sheepishly.
“Of course not! I was about to ask you, actually.” You smile.
Wonwoo makes himself comfortable next to you, smiling towards the orange cat.
“You seem to have loosened up a bit.”
“Yeah. But moments like those are also nice.” He says. “It can get….hectic sometimes and I don’t always deal well with pressure.”
“That’s exactly why the kitties are here! They have this magic ability to take away the negativity from you.” 
“Including this one?” He points towards Dino Nugget.
“Yeah. But he will try to bite you, no matter what.”
“Well, he’s an orange cat. What did you expect?” Wonwoo deadpans and you look at him with a shocked expression.
“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t want to-”
You cut him off with a laughter loud enough to scare Dino Nugget off your lap.
“You’re so serious about cats, it’s actually funny!” You admit between laughs.
“Of course I’m serious about them! And you aren’t?”
“I am! I just didn’t expect that random orange cat fact, y’know.”
“Oh, okay.” Wonwoo purses his lips.
Silence befalls the outer space.
“Great, now I made things awkward again.” He sighs in defeat.
“No, you didn’t! It was just…. well…”
“Awkward behaviour.”
“.....Yeah, actually.”
“God, Seokmin is so fucking right.” Wonwoo curses at himself.
“Who’s Seokmin?”
“One of my best friends and the bane of my existence. He has been pestering me about my lack of social skills and stuff like that.”
“I would say he sounds almost like Chan.”
“Seokmin doesn’t buy me pastries every day.”
“Did you just emit jealousy, Wonwoo?”
“No, I’m just stating the facts. I’m 100% sure he will show up today with another box of fresh desserts.”
“You can always get a bite from them.” You nudge his shoulder.
“I don’t think he would like that.”
“Why are you so negative about Chan?”
“I’m not negative! He’s just… you guys seem really close with each other, that’s all.”
“Wonwoo, we’re just friends! The work husband and wife thing is just for funsies!” You reassure him and his features soften almost immediately.
“If you say so.”
“Wonwoo, I’m being serious.”
“I know. I don’t mean to call you a liar or something.”
“Okay…” You trail off with an uncertain look written over your face.
Another moment of silence passes until Wonwoo speaks up again.
“How are you handling the double shifts?”
“Terribly. My sleep schedule has been fucked up and I don’t think I’ll be able to fix it any time soon.” You slouch in your seat.
“Any updates about the recruitment?”
“Absolutely nothing so far. Unless a miracle happens.” You scoff.
“Can you teach me how to make coffee then?” Wonwoo asks you and your eyes shoot up in surprise.
“I- Uhm, yeah I can, but why?”
“I want to help you.”
“With making coffee?!”
“Yes. What’s so weird about it?” 
“N-Nothing! I just didn’t expect you to offer to help me.”
“The truth is that I haven’t been the best towards you, while you’ve been very warm and welcoming towards me since day one.” He admits while averting your gaze.
“But giving you extra work outside of your expertise is outrageous!”
“But I’m the one asking for it!” 
A loud chirping sound comes from behind you and you notice Henry shooting a death glare at you for disrupting his beauty sleep.
“Go to sleep, Henry.” You roll your eyes at the tabby cat and the feline yawns before stretching his hind legs.
“So? What do you think?” Wonwoo asks you again.
You look at him and you can see a fire being ignited in his eyes, as if he really wants to do that.
You check your watch and look between Wonwoo and the inner space of the cafe, solidifying your decision.
“Get up.” You pat his back.
“Does that mean yes?”
“It means that you need to pay a lot of attention and catch up quickly. We have less than an hour and a half until the cafe opens.” You walk into the cafe and towards the barista counter.
Wonwoo goes towards the cat trees, smiling brightly towards the felines.
“Watch me learn how to brew coffee and win her over, okay?”
Two sharp knocks on the window wall snap him back to reality and he looks at you furiously waving at him to come inside.
Wonwoo jogs back in the cafe, joining you behind the counter.
“Where do you think you’re going?” You put your hands on your waist.
“Uh, to watch you make coffee?”
“Rule number one: Never enter the barista area without lint-rolling your clothes first.” You point towards a shelf away from the counter, where a couple of lint rollers are.
“When did you even clean yourself up?” Wonwoo asks while running the roller over his hoodie and jeans.
“When you were talking to the cats.” You deadpan.
“Okay, my clothes are clean. Now what?”
“Rule number two: Always wear a barista apron while working behind your counter. We hang them right next to the window wall.”
He picks one of the aprons and puts the top strap around his neck, tying the lower one around his waist. You don’t miss the double loop and you wonder how slim his waist must be and how you hands would-
“What is rule number three?” His question cuts your train of thoughts and you try to get yourself together.
“Wash your hands thoroughly, of course.”
“Yes ma’am.”
The first steps of Wonwoo’s barista adventures go rather smoothly - he realizes he’s good at memorizing the various coffee blends. Handling the machine isn’t that much difficult, but it’s definitely not as easy as assembling his camera.
His eyes never leave your skilled hands, effortlessly maneuvering a glass under the machine, clicking the proper buttons to make a serve of espresso. 
“That looked so easy, but something tells me it won’t be as easy as I think it is.” Wonwoo laughs awkwardly.
“It’s actually not very hard. You just have to be careful with the amount of coffee you will put in the portafilter.” 
“Can I try now?”
“Don’t be impatient. You need to throw away the used shot and then purge the machine with water first.” You explain with a smile.
“Hm, okay. I think I can do that.” 
He takes out the portafilter and disposes of the used espresso shot. He cleans the portafilter separately while running the machine with only water. 
“Good job! It was smart to clean the portafilter during the machine run.” 
“Thought it would save me time.”
“And you thought well. This can be really useful during rush hour.”
“What’s next?”
“You dry the filter and fill it in with the desired amount of espresso. But remember, it needs to be even!”
“Got that.” He grabs the bag of ground coffee and takes a few spoonfuls of the blend and puts it in the clean filter, tapping it on the counter to flatten the surface. 
“Use the tamper to tamp it down and make it compact enough.” You remind him of the next step.
He wordlessly follows your tip and does exactly as you told him, locking the portafilter in the machine. He grabs a demitasse glass and places it under the machine and presses the button, watching the dark brown liquid flow into the cup.
“Congratulations, you just made your first cup of espresso!” You give him tiny claps and he smiles sheepishly. 
“Moment of truth.” He breathes out and hands you over the glass to taste the coffee he made. You take a sip and allow your taste buds to absorb the rich flavor.
“Not bad for the first time!” You hum in satisfaction.
“Thank God, I thought I would poison you or something.” Wonwoo lets out a heavy breath.
“Why are you so critical of yourself?”
“I have been classified as a kitchen hazard.”
“Well, this isn’t a kitchen, as you can see.” 
“But still-”
“No buts. You asked to learn how to make coffee and you have to accept that you’re going to make mistakes in the process.”
“I know, but it’s kinda scary.” 
“It was scary for you to work among so many people the first week, but you didn’t give up, did you?” You cross your arms over your chest.
“I am doing it for the cats, Y/N.”
“If that’s what makes your boat float, then who am I to disagree?” You laugh and clean the machine all over again.
The words die down in Wonwoo’s throat and he tries to find something to occupy himself with.
“You don’t have to do anything else around here now.” You tell him.
“Oh. Was that all?” His voice comes out almost disappointed.
“Only for now. It’s not like we have a lot of time left until customers start coming in and I would hate to throw you in the den of wolves right away. Besides, your friends seem to miss you already.” You turn your head to the window wall and Wonwoo follows suit, breaking out in laughter when he sees Dino Nugget scratching against the window.
“Oh my God, not him again.”
“Hey, don’t be mean to him!”
“Y/N, he literally bit you an hour ago.”
“He’s just an orange cat - or so you said. He’s also Chan’s fave.”
“Well too bad I already have a fave.” Wonwoo unties his apron and hangs it.
“Ooh, who is it?” You ask with curiosity.
“That’s my secret.”
“Okay mister secretive.” You scoff lightly.
Secretive. What a great word to describe me, Wonwoo thinks with a tight-lipped smile that fights to become a grin when he returns to the cafe cats, sitting down on one of the tables to fiddle with his camera.
He skims through the picture he has taken so far, stopping at the one where Dino Nugget is in your lap and you’re petting him with a loving smile on his face.
As if on cue, Tofu tip toes her way next to Wonwoo and puts her paw over his hand, raising her body on her hind legs.
“Isn’t she beautiful?” 
The feline purrs loudly and rubs her head on the back of his hand.
“Yeah, I think so too.”
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Hours later, at Joshua’s place.
“So you’re telling me that Wonwoo is smitten with Y/N?”
“Yeah! You have to trust me on this, Shua, I just know it!” Chan repeatedly taps his soju glass on the table.
“Okay, but why are you so pressed about it?”
“Because none of them are doing anything about it! And I hate mutual pining with a burning passion!”
“Sounds like you’re scared of losing your work wife to me.” Joshua smirks in his glass.
“I’m not scared! I just want to look out for her!”
“As her work husband?”
“And her bestie, duh!” 
“You’re so dramatic about this.”
“And you’re so nonchalant about this!”
“It’s their business, not mine, Chan!”
“And since when do you not care about gossip, Joshua?” The younger man raises his eyebrow.
“Don’t you see I’m making an effort to stay gossip-free?” Joshua whines in defeat. 
“And it’s failing miserably.”
The older man sighs and drinks a bit of his soju. “Yeah, it fucking did.”
“What, you know things I don’t?”
“Let’s just say that running the HR of an establishment grants you perks that someone like you doesn’t have.”
“Just tell me already! I wasn’t there today, come on!”
“Wonwoo and Y/N were both seen behind the barista counter today.”
“Okay….Maybe he was taking pics of her during the deed? Y’know, for promotion purposes?”
“You don’t understand - Y/N was showing him how to operate the coffee machine. He even managed to make a few batches of espresso.”
Chan chokes on alcohol and starts coughing loudly, smacking his chest.
“Whoa, whoa, breathe!” Joshua offers him a glass of water. “I didn’t mean to kill you!”
“Well - gah - I certainly felt like dying!” He gasps for breath. “But - How? When did things escalate so fast?!”
“From what I’ve heard, Wonwoo wanted to help Y/N until someone applies for the position and Boss agreed to it, as long as he’s under Y/N’s supervision.”
“Fuck this, I can help her too!”
“Bitch you don’t even know which way the corks turn!” Joshua laughs.
“Fuck you too, Hong!”
“You know, this could work in their favor. And yours, eventually.”
“How?”
“They will get to spend more time together and grow closer, you idiot!”
“Well yeah, but that also depends on whether one of the two will fuck up the process or not!” Chan retorts.
“Just….have some faith, okay?” Joshua tries to convince him.
“If you say so, I guess.”
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Two months later.
“Did you have a secret glow up or something?” Seokmin scans Wonwoo from the top to the bottom.
“You can just admit you were checking me out.” Wonwoo rolls his eyes.
“As long as the right person isn’t checking you out, my eyes don’t matter, friend.”
“Oh my God, just say you want to talk about Y/N.”
“Yes I fucking do, because she’s clearly the reason you’ve changed!” Seokmin slams his hands on the table. “And for the better!”
“I don’t feel like I’ve undergone any drastic changes, though.” 
“That’s because you’re extremely harsh on yourself and refuse to see the truth!”
“And the truth is?”
Seokmin grunts in disappointment. “That you are head over heels for Y/N, you idiot.”
“And what if I am? I mean, she hasn’t really shown any real interest towards me.” Wonwoo shrugs.
“Dude, she has literally taken you under her wing and taught you how to make coffee! While she was swamped with work!”
“I just wanted to help her, she was doing double shifts for two weeks straight!”
“And I’m more than sure that she likes you even more because of that!”
“I was just trying to be nice, just like that.”
“Wonwoo, nobody is nice just like that. Everyone has their own agendas.” Seokmin smirks. “It all boils down to the benefits these agendas hold. And yours is going to benefit a lot of people.”
“Let’s say you’re right then. Why didn’t she just confess? She’s like, the definition of an extrovert.”
“Not everyone has the guts or lack of tact to just go to their crush and confess their feelings to them, you know.” 
“How can you be so sure that Y/N has a crush on me?”
“I’m going to ask you a few questions and I want you to answer them truthfully.” Seokmin puts his palms together.
“Yes, dear therapist.” Wonwoo crosses his arms in front of his chest and mocks his friend.
“Does she know your coffee order?”
“Yeah, but she knows the coffee order of most regulars, it’s her job.”
“Fair point, but does she make coffee for you during work and accompany it with a snack?”
Wonwoo racks his brain for instances that match Seokmin’s question and to his surprise, he recalls a lot of them.
“You don’t even have to say anything, I can see the answer written all over your face.”
“Is that even enough to count as proof?”
“I’m not done yet.” Seokmin takes a sip of water to clear his throat. “Moving on to my next question - does she ask you about your day, how did you sleep and stuff like that?”
“Yeah, but that’s basic human decency.”
“Ugh, whatever. Have you ever complimented her appearance? Like, ‘Hey, that color looks very pretty on you!’ or something like that?”
“.....No.” Wonwoo replies with an awkward expression.
Seokmin rolls his eyes and drags his palms over his face dramatically.
“Why are you acting like this?! I’m not ignoring her on purpose!”
“Then why aren’t you doing anything?!”
“How can I do something when she’s so pretty and popular and a fucking sunshine and I’m….this?” Wonwoo vaguely gestures at himself.
Seokmin sighs audibly and rests his elbows on the table. “Can you tell me what’s really going on? Because I am not buying the shit you’ve said so far.”
Wonwoo’s expression turns bitter the moment Seokmin calls him out.
“There’s a contender?”
“Yeah, that fucking dipshit called Chan. He never misses a chance to show off that stupid smile of his to everyone and call himself Y/N’s ‘work husband’. He has the audacity to buy her snacks whenever their shifts overlap!” 
“Oh my God.” Seokmin bursts out in laughter.
“I’m sharing my problems with you and you’re laughing?”
“I am laughing because you’re green with jealousy!”
“I- I’m not jealous! I’m just stating the facts here! Nothing more and nothing less.”
“Wonwoo, it’s just you and me here, you can be honest.”
“I- Fine, I am jealous of that short bitch and the relationship he has with Y/N.”
“And that’s fine! But you also need to keep in mind that Y/N probably knows this Chan guy longer than she knows you, so it’s kind of natural to have a closer relationship with him.”
“You are not helping right now, Seok.”
Silence befalls the two friends as they pick on the leftovers of their food, contemplating their discussion.
“Something just popped into my head.” Seokmin speaks up again.
“It better not be another brain fart of yours.” Wonwoo grimaces.
“You should go to work tomorrow with your motorbike!”
“Okay. And?” 
“And….You should dress up a tad bit fancier for once.”
“Why should I even-”
“Shhhhhhh, just… Just do as I say, okay? Now zip it, I wasn’t finished yet.” Seokmin shushes him. “Let me think…. a white button-up and those dark blue wide leg jeans you have?”
“What about those?”
“You’re wearing them tomorrow. No questions asked.”
“Seokmin, it’s the middle of November, I’m gonna freeze to death.”
“You’re gonna wear a heavy jacket on top, you idiot. Besides, it won’t be that cold tomorrow.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“Ever heard of weather forecasts?”
“Fuck you.”
“I’m not the one you want to fuck, let’s be real here.” Seokmin smirks and Wonwoo throws a fried potato at him. 
“I swear to God, if I end up making a fool of myself or catching a cold, you won’t hear from me ever again.” 
“Cool, does that mean I get to adopt Salem after your death?”
“Keep your grimy hands off my cat, bitch.”
“I will, because you’ll be alive and Y/N will be in your arms within the span of….twenty four hours. Maybe less, if you play your cards right.” Seokmin winks.
“Has anyone ever told you that you look scary when you have something specific in mind?”
“You can just admit you like it when I look scary because it makes me even sexier.”
“You’re fucking gross.”
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Wonwoo wakes up at 7:30 sharp, as always. But today is different - today is the day he finally confesses to you. Blame Seokmin’s idea, blame Chan’s behavior towards you, blame his own cowardice - whatever the reason is, Wonwoo is dead set on achieving his goal today.
He opens his closet and skims through his clothes until he finds the ones Seokmin specifically told him to wear.
He’s worried he might catch a cold with just a white button down and jeans, but there’s always his trusty fuzzy jacket - the cold never passes through that and it definitely won’t pass now, no matter what he’s wearing underneath.
The thought of wearing this particular outfit to work in order to impress you makes him feel stupid and giddy at the same time, as if he’s the nerdy highschooler in love with the pretty girl of the class. 
“How damn cliché.” He chuckles to himself and takes out the clothes to hang them in front of the closet. He goes to the bathroom, jumping in the shower for a quick refreshment. It only takes him five minutes to wash his hair and body, wrapping a towel around his waist. He takes a quick look at himself in the mirror and nods in satisfaction. 
The gym has definitely paid off, he thinks and grabs the hair dryer to dry his hair. Once he’s done, he chooses to lightly run his fingers through them, not wanting to disrupt the curly form.
He returns to the bedroom to put on his clothes, humming in approval when he sees his reflection in the full body mirror. He spritzes his favorite perfume all over him and wears his horn-rimmed glasses to complete the look and wears his jacket on top to keep himself warm. 
He really doesn’t want to admit it, but Seokmin might be right on the money this time.
He’s about to leave when his eyes fall on the spare helmet he keeps in the corner of his closet and decides to take it with him - in case the plan works out, he wants to keep you safe while you’re riding with him on his bike.
He just hopes you aren’t afraid of motorbikes.
Salem walks in the bedroom and meows at Wonwoo to get his attention.
“Hi buddy. How do I look?”
The cat purrs loudly as he rubs himself on Wonwoo’s jeans.
“Thanks for the approval. I hope Y/N approves too.”
Salem meows again and paws on his dad’s leg.
“I’ll see you later, pal. Hopefully with some pretty company.”
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“So it’s official?” 
“Unfortunately, yes. Yoona has completed her rehab, but she has decided to move out of Seoul.” Your boss notifies you.
“I see…” You think and mixed feelings wash over you. You’re sad that Yoona is leaving so soon, but that also means you’ll get to spend even more time with Wonwoo behind the barista counter.
“But on the bright side, we managed to get a new employee!”
“W-What? When did that happen?”
“Just yesterday! I asked them if they could start soon and they will be here tomorrow morning.” Your boss grins widely. “Can I count on you to show them the ropes?”
“Oh, um, yeah, of course!” You form a fake smile.
“Great! You’ll get an extra this month for this, do not worry about that.”
“I appreciate it, Boss.” 
The lady walks away and your shoulders slouch in defeat, your dreams of watching Wonwoo’s forearms operate the coffee machine.
“A penny for your thoughts, wife?” Chan comes up to the counter.
“A penny might be too little for the amount of thoughts I have, Chan.”
“You don’t seem excited today.”
“Boss just told me that Yoona is leaving and we already have a replacement for her.” You frown.
“I know you’re sad you probably won’t see Yoona again, but at least you won’t have to work overtime again!” Chan tries to lift your mood.
“That’s not the only problem, Chan.”
“What is it then- Oh. Oh.”
“Yeah, exactly.”
“Well, I mean…It’s not like you won’t see him ever again.”
“But it’s not the same!” 
“Oh my God, can you just confess already?! I’m tired of this rom-com!” Chan whines.
“You know what?” Your mouth falls open. “I might do it today.”
“Finally! But why is your mouth hanging like that?”
You point towards the door and Wonwoo who walks inside, looking like the male lead of a k-drama.
“Can you please close your mouth? A fly could enter and you could choke.” He snickers and you slap his arm.
“Good morning!” Wonwoo greets the two of you with a bright smile.
“Good morning Wonwoo! You seem to be in a good mood today.”
“Yeah, you could say that. By the way, I bought you some honey cupcakes.” He puts the pastry box on the counter and he walks next to you to wear his apron.
“What?! They told me they had run out today!” Chan is flabbergasted.
“Well, you weren’t lucky enough to catch the fresh batch, Channie.” Wonwoo smirks and the younger man grimaces and almost slams the water glasses on his disk.
“Who are you and what have you done to the Wonwoo I know?” You narrow your eyes at him.
“I am him. Just a bit elevated.” He puffs out his chest ever so slightly.
“Does the elevation come with a brand new motorbike?”
“Oh that? I already had it, but it was under repair for a good chunk of time.”
“But now you can ride it again, right?”
“Of course! Otherwise I wouldn’t be here now.”
“It looks really cool by the way.” 
“The motorbike?”
“Everything, actually.”
“Everything?” He tilts his head sideways.
You clear your throat. “By the way, Boss told me we’re getting a new barista tomorrow.” 
“Oh, I see.” He replies with a monotonous voice. “So no more sessions?”
“Yeah, pretty much. But I’m sure you probably miss your camera.”
“It’s not like I wasn’t touching it at all. Besides, working with you is really fun.”
“Not anymore, since it’s the last day today.”
“Well then, we should make the most of it, right?” He looks at you with a swirling mix of warmth and seduction.
“B-Be careful with the cinnamon, you don’t want to overdo it.” You stammer over your words, turning your head away.
“Yes ma’am.” Wonwoo chuckles, not missing the light flush over your cheeks as he resumes his task.
As if your brains are connected to the same thinking bubble, they both repeat the same phrase over and over again.
This is going smoother than cream.
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“Is it legal to do this?” Wonwoo asks with uncertainty.
“Relax, we’re not gonna commit crimes. We can just say we stayed behind to clean up! Not that anyone will care that we made two cups of coffee.” You reassure him.
“But the machine isn’t on. How are you going to make coffee without it?”
You flash a warm smile. “This is exactly why I wanted it to be the two of us.”
You search under the counter for a few seconds and you pull out a black box that has been tightly sealed. You open it carefully and take out a coffee pot made of copper, a sealed bag of coffee blend and a mini gas heater.
“What is all this?” Wonwoo’s curiosity is piqued.
“This is something I learned during my vacation in Greece. I will show you how to make traditional Greek coffee.”
Wonwoo’s eyes widen and he finds himself walking behind the counter and right next to you.
You open the sealed bag and the rich aroma quickly spreads in the air, satisfied hums echoing in the silent cafe.
“You get it now, don’t you?”
“It smells so good.”
“Wait until you actually taste it.” You giggle. 
“Judging from the tools, it must be hard to make it.”
“You’re not entirely wrong.” You fill the coffee pot with cold water. “It requires a lot of technique and “meraki”, as the locals usually call it.”
“What does it mean?”
“It’s the love and passion poured in the coffee brewing process. Even if it’s served as a product to a customer, it’s always created with fine motions and the hope of conveying said effort to the customer through a cup of Greek coffee.”
“This sounds more like a confession of love to me.” Wonwoo comments and you are happy the lighting is dim enough to hide the creeping blush on your cheeks.
“Well, that’s one way to put it.” You set the coffee pot on the table and take out two small porcelain cups from the box.
“That’s really pretty.”
“Thanks. I got them as a souvenir from a local shop, along with the briki.”
“The what?”
“That’s the greek word for the coffee pot! They use this specific one because it’s the best at storing the heat in its walls and allowing the coffee to roast slowly.”
“I stand corrected. This is a ritual of love, not just a confession.” He chuckles at your excitement.
That’s why I’m doing it, you four-eyed hot bastard! You mentally scream but keep your smiley facade on.
“Why did you get only two of these?” He keeps asking you questions.
“The old lady at the shop had made only two of those.” You explain. “But she did think I was buying it for my boyfriend and myself.” You end your sentence with an awkward laugh.
“I think that’s adorable, Y/N.” He rests his hand on his palm, almost 
“It would be, if I had a real boyfriend.”
“Well, you can always share a cup with your work husband.”
You raise your eyebrow. “Are you jealous, Wonwoo?”
“Me? No, not at all.” He brushes it off. “I just mentioned Chan because you’re really close to him.”
“Hmm, if you say so.” You shrug.
A beat of awkward silence passes and Wonwoo attempts to shift the mood to his favor.
“Can you guide me? Making the coffee, I mean.” He almost stutters.
“O-Oh, of course I can!” You slide behind him and watch him tighten his apron around his slender waist. Since when did he have such a slender waist?!
He picks up a teaspoon and puts four spoonfuls in the water, turning on the heat.
“The heat should be medium to low. Stir it only at the beginning and then let it heat through.”
He gives the coffee a few stirs to evenly spread the blend in the water, until it starts heating up.
“Be careful not to stir the coffee all the time, while it is roasting. Give a little bit more love and attention to create the right amount of kaimaki.” You give him gentle directions and he follows them to the last detail.
“What is kaimaki?” 
“It’s the creamy foam that forms on top of the coffee after brewing it.”
“It’s dark brown because of the blend?”
“Exactly. You’re a fast learner, aren’t you?” You give him a sly smile.
“I have a great teacher.” He reciprocates the smile and your heart skips a bit for the umpteenth time today.
Watching him brew such a difficult type of coffee with his sleeves rolled up and his deft hands carefully looking at the kaimaki makes the butterflies in your stomach dance like a hurricane.
Everything feels so intimate - from the cafe itself to the set of porcelain cups you bought as a memento from Greece, the words of the old lady who thought you bought them for a lover echoing in your head once again.
“I am turning the gas off now.” Wonwoo announces and you nod affirmatively. He does as he said and picks up the briki, but he accidentally touches the side of it and almost burns his hand.
“Fuck!”
“Wonwoo!” You gasp and immediately grasp his hands, knocking down the coffee and spilling it over the counter. “Are your hands okay?!”
“I’m okay, but-”
“Oh shit.” You curse and grab a bunch of paper towels to wipe the spilled coffee before it seeps into the wood.
He notices the coffee reaching up to the base of the cups and he picks them up, putting them in the sink to wash them. He washes and dries them thoroughly, followed by the copper coffee pot.
Hurried movements and a curse of strings are heard through the glass wall, the eyes of multiple cats staring at the two of you trying to clean up the mess you made.
After a few minutes, the counter looks as good as new, but both of you look frustrated and even more tired than before.
“Well, this was an ordeal.” You let out a huff as you throw the wasted paper towels in the bin and hang your apron next to the others.
“Y/N, I am really sorry.” Wonwoo sulks, not daring to look you in the eyes.
“Wonu, it’s okay! It was just an accident, accidents happen all the time here.” You try to make him feel better.
“But you were looking forward to this-”
“Wonwoo.” You stop him from completing his sentence. “It’s okay. I am not mad at you.” You gingerly hold his face with your hands, the rate of your heart reaching Mach speed because of the heat on his skin.
You realize you’re too close for comfort and retract your hands, scared you might have overstepped his boundaries. 
“Don’t.”
Wonwoo holds your wrists with his hands and gently places them on his chest. He can feel your fingertips almost trembling, the tension skyrocketing. 
“Wonu, I don’t understand-”
He gently holds the side of your neck and kisses you with the desire he was holding for the past two months. He lets go of his uncertainty and embraces his feelings for you, expressing them through this kiss.
It feels like you’re in a fever dream, every fiber of your existence is standing on the edge of inferno and you don’t want it to stop. Yet his mouth feels like an oasis - and you won’t let anything separate you from it.
You let out a whine when Wonwoo breaks the kiss, but you shudder when he rips his glasses off his face and lifts you up to put you on top of the counter.
“You have no idea how long I wanted to feel your touch on me, Y/N.” He rasps. “You’ve been plaguing my thoughts ever since I met you and I just couldn’t-”
You cut him off by pulling the collar of his shirt and smash your lips on him again, seizing control this time. You wrap your legs around his waist and jerk his body forward, colliding with your chest.
Your hands are deeply rooted in his permed locks, raking your nails on his scalp. He’s no better than you, his palms glued to your thighs.
“I’ve been feeling the exact same way, Wonu.” You moan against his mouth.
“God, please don’t stop calling me that.” 
“I had no intention of stopping, Wonu.”
He breaks the kiss again and pushes you on your back, planting his hands on each side of your head. 
“Please tell me you want this.” He begs you. “I want, need to touch you, take care of you, fucking worship you.” 
“Do it. Please do it, Wonu, I need you so bad.” 
He lets out a shaky breath and unbuttons the first three buttons of his shirt and bunches up your sweater to reveal the hem of your jeans and unbutton it with the same dexterity he uses his camera. He pulls them down and lets the fabric pool in front of his feet, his hands caressing your naked legs.
“Pretty.” He fiddles with the lacey details of your panties.
“Me or my underwear?” 
“Both.” 
“Smooth. But as much as I’d love you to sweet talk, I think you should do other things with your mouth.”
“Your wish is my command, sunshine.” 
Wonwoo puts your legs over his shoulders and tenderly traces his lips on your inner thighs, giving you a glance before sliding your panties to the side.
He gives your clit a quick peck and glides his tongue through your folds, all the way down to your entrance. And repeats the motion, again and again, speeding up with each drag of his wet muscle.
You drag your nails on the mahogany counter and bite your bottom lip to suppress your moans, but his mouth is being so kind and loving to your pussy that it makes you want to scream his name until the windows crash in tiny pieces from the volume of your voice.
He stops to take a breather, a glossy film coating his lips. “Best fucking pussy I’ve ever tasted.”
“Never thought the shy photographer slash barista would be cursing after eating pussy like a God.” You laugh breathlessly.
“I can do much more, if you let me.” He suggests with a gaze full of desire, lips parted again and ready to engulf your clit again.
“I will, but not here.” You put your hand in his hair to stop him. “I don’t want to risk being seen by bypassing people.”
“I don’t know about people, but there are a bunch of cats staring from the glass wall.” Wonwoo chuckles as he watches you gasp when you turn your head towards the window and you see thirteen pairs of glowing cat eyes staring at the two of you.
“I love them but they are fucking scaring me right now, can we please get out of here?” You ask him.
“My place or yours?” Wonwoo picks up your jeans and gives them to you to put them on.
“Mine is a twenty-minute ride with the bus from here.” You say.
“My place it is, then.” Wonwoo grins as he wipes his lips with the back of his hand. “Hope you aren’t scared of motorbikes.”
“Would you laugh if I said I’ve been thinking of being your backpack princess?”
“Would you believe me if I told you I brought an extra helmet just in case you wanted to be my backpack princess?”
“Who are you and what have you done to the cute and super shy Wonwoo?” You shoot him a playful glare.
“He’s still here. He just decided to act according to his desires and feelings.”
“I would like you to pass him my earnest thanks.”
“He accepts them with pleasure. Ready to go?” He offers you his hand.
“Yes sir.” You giggle and button your jeans, lacing your hand with his, as he guides you out of the cafe.
You make sure you turn off the lights and lock the doors before Wonwoo hands you over the extra helmet, checking up on whether you fastened it good enough. As soon as you settle on the bike behind him, he turns on the engine and grabs your arms, putting them around his waist, as if he’s telling you to hold on tight. You let out a squeal when he speeds away from the cafe, but the helmet around your head mutes your voice. Even though it’s your first time riding on a bike, you’re not scared at all. If anything, you find it very fun and kind of liberating.
Perhaps it’s the fact that Wonwoo reciprocated your feelings after two months of mutual pining.
You don’t even realize how fast the time passes when Wonwoo taps your hands to let go of him and get off the bike.
“W-We’re here already?” You ask dumbfounded as you take off the helmet.
“Baby, I wasn’t even speeding up.” He chuckles as he turns off the engine of the bike, taking off his own helmet. “But it’s for the better, I suppose.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because it means you’re looking forward to what will happen within that house.” He smirks in your face and you grab his hand, pulling him towards the entrance.
“You’re so eager.” He’s trying to fish out his keys from his bag.
“I wonder whose fault is that.” You tease him.
“I intend to make it up to you, sweetheart.” He reassures you and finds the keys after a bit of searching, sliding them in the keyhole to unlock the door.
As soon as both of you are inside his house, you pin him on the door and kiss him hungrily, your hands sliding off your coat first and his jacket second, aiming for his buttoned shirt next.
“Bedroom, please.” Wonwoo breaks the kiss and you nod in agreement. He lifts you up in his arms, his arms under your thighs keeping you safe. 
You’re certain he’s gonna pin you down on the bed, but you’re proven wrong when he pins you on the nearest bedroom wall, grinding his clothed bulge right on your crotch.
“Didn’t peg you for the needy type.” You grip his shoulders to hold onto him tighter.
“How can I not be needy when I have the girl of my dreams right where I want her?” He groans and lets down your legs, hands flying to the button of your jeans. “Can I?”
“Fuck yes, please throw them away if you can.” You breathe heavily.
He eagerly unbuttons your jeans and drags them down along with your panties, throwing them somewhere in the room. He then unbuttons his own jeans, dropping them down to his ankles with his boxers and kicking them away. He’s just one thrust away from entering you, but his mind goes blank.
“Wonwoo? What’s wrong?”
“I- Fuck, I don’t have any condoms.” He curses under his breath.
“It’s okay. I am clean and on the pill, you can go raw.” You reassure him.
“Y/N, I’m serious.”
“I’m serious too! Are you clean?” 
“Yeah, I got tested two weeks ago and haven’t slept with someone for God knows how long.” He blurts out, cheeks flushed a cute pink.
“You’re so cute.” You stifle a laugh.
“You and your pussy are cuter than me, darling.” He laughs and hooks his forearms under your thighs to pry them open and keep them locked closed to your chest. The wall is cold against your back, but the rest of your body feels on fire.
You let out a whiny moan when Wonwoo starts by pushing the tip of his cock, taking his time to ease himself inside you and not hurt you. When he finally manages to fit his shaft in your hole, he throws his head back and his mouth falls open, deep moans vibrating from his chest.
“You’re- Oh god, Wonwoo, it feels so full.” You dig your nails in his shoulder blades, bunching up the dress shirt.
“Fuuuuck, I know.” He groans and pulls his hips away until only his tip is inside you, pushing back with a fluid thrust. A gasp escapes your lips when the thrust makes your body jerk up against the wall.
“Ah- Please do that again.” You beg, giving him your best pleading eyes.
“Shit, with pleasure.” He licks his bottom lip and thrusts inside you the same way, his eyes glued on your face to study your expressions.
He gets the green light when you nod in agreement and repeats the same thrusting pattern, full-bodied yet slow thrusts that rub your molten walls deliciously.
None of you are able to form coherent sentences, you only express yourselves through wanton moans. You feel your skin getting sticky with sweat and your orgasm starting to build up dangerously close to the climax.
“Are you close, sunshine?” He asks you between pants and you nod furiously.
“Hold on tight.” He instructs you and you claw on him like a rescued cat as he lifts you from the wall and walks over to the bed, gently placing you on your back on the mattress. 
“W-Wonu, please, I need to cum!” You hiccup and try to wrap your legs around his waist.
“I know, baby, I know.” He puts one knee on the mattress and angles your hips upwards to hit it deeper. He bends his torso down to touch your chest, his lips hovering over yours as his breath mingles with yours.
“Wanna cum together, sunshine?”
“Yes, yes, please!” 
“Where do you want me to cum?”
“Inside, fuck, do it inside!”
Wonwoo gasps loudly and loses his balance, crumbling on you at the same time his orgasm crashes upon him. His back shudders while his cock paints your walls white and your lips are busy kissing and biting his neck to muffle your own orgasmic noises. Your walls clench around his cock and you milk him dry until he has nothing else to give, breathing against his neck rapidly.
Both of you take some time and remain still, your breaths slowly regaining their normal rhythms. You can feel your body complaining, legs growing limp and your torso being crushed by Wonwoo’s weight.
“Wonu, you’re heavy…”
“Fuck, sorry.” He gently lifts himself off you and his cock slips out of your pussy, the mixture of your cum and his nearly spilling on the sheets. He’s fast enough to catch it with his fingers and push it back inside you, enjoying the way you shudder for him/
“Wonu!”
“I couldn’t help it, sunshine. Not when you look so pretty.” He sucks his fingers clean. “And taste so damn good.”
“Can you just…clean me up?”
“You didn’t even have to tell me.” 
He picks you up in bridal style and carries you to the bathroom, letting you sit on the edge of the tub as he lets the water from the tap run warm.
“Do you mind if I fall asleep in the process?” You mumble tiredly.
“Not at all, sweetheart. I’ll take care of everything, you don’t have to worry.” He presses a kiss on your temple.
“Thank you, Wonu.”
You end up falling asleep halfway through the bath, but Wonwoo doesn’t mind. The lovesick grin on his face doesn’t falter until he’s done drying your hair and putting you in a pair of clean comfy clothes - his clothes.
As soon as you’re under the bedsheets, you cling onto him in your sleep, chest rising and falling peacefully in his arms.
Wonwoo can’t believe this is real, even if he can touch your face and hug you closer to his body. 
There is one thing coursing through his mind before drifting off to sleep - Seokmin was right after all.
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Your deep slumber is disturbed by the ringtone of your phone and you grumble in your sleep to find the strength and get up to search for your phone. You nearly fall down on your knees when you try to stand up, grabbing the edge of the bed at the last minute to stabilize yourself.
“Nngh……Baby? What are you doing?” Wonwoo asks with a scratchy voice, in a similar state as you.
“Someone is calling me and I don’t know where the hell my phone is!” You curse out loud as you keep searching under the pile of clothes.
Your phone stops ringing and you plop down on the floor dramatically. 
“Y/N, it was just a phone call.” Wonwoo tries to reassure you as he gets out of bed.
“But what if it was something important?”
“Then whoever it was, they will probably call again.”
Suddenly, it hits you.
“Wonwoo, what time is it?” You ask him with fear in your eyes.
“I don’t know, let me check real quick.” He walks back to his nightstand and opens the screen of his phone, a loud ‘fuck’ echoing from his mouth.
“Wonwoo?”
“I don’t want you to panic, but it’s 10AM.” He deadpans.
“Fuck, I knew it! We’re fucking late to work!” You spring up on your feet and pick up your clothes, making a beeline for the bathroom.
You splash water over your face and almost squeal when you notice the vibrant purple marks on your neck and collarbones, mortified at the thought of someone seeing them.
“Baby, are you good there?” Wonwoo yells from the bedroom.
“No! I need a fucking turtleneck!” You yell back and stomp your way back to the bedroom.
“Okay but why?” He peeks his head from the closet and takes a better look at your torso. “Yeah, forget I asked.” He purses his lips and picks a cream colored turtleneck, giving it to you.
“God, I love you so much.” You breathe a sigh of relief and immediately put it on, running back to the bathroom. The scent of cedar and peaches gives you a hard time to focus on making your hair look presentable, but you resist the urge to duck your nose under the soft fabric.
Wonwoo does a double take on himself and decides to go with a black turtleneck, his eyes shying away from the marks you left on him last night. However, part of him feels very smug about them, knowing he’s gonna be walking in the cafe with your marks of claim all over his body.
“Come on, stop dwindling, we’re gonna be even more late!” You appear in front of him again and pull on his sleeve repeatedly.
“Oh my God, stop pulling me!” He laughs at your desperation and follows you to the living room, picking up his coat from yesterday.
About half an hour after riding on Wonwoo’s motorbike and some annoying traffic, you both make it safely into the cafe. You’re welcomed by a very frustrated Chan and the new barista intern, struggling with the coffee machine.
“And here I thought you actually ditched work today.” He gives you a smile full of irony.
“I’m really sorry, Chan, I slept through my alarm clock. I swear it wasn’t on purpose!” You defend yourself with a lie while fastening your apron to get to work.
“Whatever you say.” He sighs. “Just…get to work, I’m so fucking done with this monstrosity.”
You quickly greet the new intern with a warm smile and turn your back on the two men to focus on the training at hand.
Wonwoo begins to put his camera together, checking his equipment. He can feel Chan’s scrutinizing gaze on him.
“For how long are you going to keep burning holes in my back?” The older man asks.
“Until you admit that you spent the night with Y/N.” Chan crosses his arms in front of his chest.
Wonwoo puts his camera down and straightens his back, now towering over the guy.
“Yeah, I did. Want me to tell you how exactly we spent our night?” 
“No need, I was able to put two and two together when I came here and cleaned up the entire place.” Chan pinches the bridge of his nose.
“My patience ran thin and so did hers, I guess you already know how things went down.” Wonwoo smirks.
“Well it was about fucking time, dude.” Chan pats Wonwoo’s shoulder. “You were blueballing the poor girl for two months now and I was starting to feel that way as well.” 
Chan goes to the outer space of the cafe, leaving Wonwoo utterly stunned. The younger man gets a few orders from the early customers and makes a beeline for the window seats of the cats, bypassing the table Joshua is sitting on.
“I am so sorry, darlings. I hope none of you were traumatized from whatever vulgarities you witnessed last night.” He pets them one by one, cooing at them as if they were his own kids.
“Why are you trying to console the cats?” The older man asks.
“If I were to tell you, you’d need consolation as well.” 
“Do I smell work gossip?”
“More like work porn.”
Joshua puts his hand over his mouth like a gossip girl, his eyes shining like those of an imp.
“Don’t tell me-”
“Yeah, they did.”
“Damn, I gotta give it to your intuition.”
“How about giving me a fucking break already?!” Chan whispers in frustration.
“What, you saw cum on the floor or something?” Joshua jokes, but the waiter’s expression is stone-cold.
“You cannot be serious.”
“Fucking try me, Shua.”
He turns his head around and watches you and Wonwoo giggling together, his face turning back to his friend.
“At least your work wife is happy now.”
Chan smiles gently as he leans against the wall.
“That she definitely is.”
2K notes · View notes
koiiiji · 4 months ago
Note
im here for yakuza!Gun x reader smut 🤧🤧 like, you stayed at his family's mansion overnight because he introduced you to his clan for the first time and when the night came, this perv didn't care there was no soundproof system between rooms in the mansion (ofc, that's the traditional Japanese house style!!), he kept doing the deed, and even warned you to lower your voice if you didn't want anyone to hear 😏😏
ty as always bae <33
p/s: that's the idea and you can customize it however you want, just make sure that he is a meanie but soft at the same time (is it possible hm 🤔)
p/s (2): i have to send this idea right away in case you close your ask box too early lol 😂😂
author's note ; i mean Gun IS in fact yakuza, no? anyway sooo here we go! i had kinda same scenario but more rough and generally dark, like yandere, but fuck it, i think i won’t finish it anytime soon, bc i thought to add it to your request, but i don’t want to make you wait anymore. i think i was carried away a little in beginning, so its longer then expected, sorry!! 💞😮‍💨
author's note 2 ; art from pinterest, it says credits to : jongjong822 on x
tw ; f! reader, nsfw, minors, ageless/empty blogs DNI OR I WILL BLOCK YOU!!!
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to be honest, you had no plans to meet Yamazaki Gun's family tonight. it's not that you were against the idea — quite the opposite! you'd heard plenty about who his father was and what his family did. there were a lot of rumors swirling around town, and while you were a little wary, you were mostly curious. besides, you hadn’t been together for that long, so you didn’t expect Gun to introduce you to his family anytime soon.
when he told you earlier in the day to dress up for the evening, you weren’t surprised. it was just another night, another overly expensive restaurant, and another excuse to be in his company. as you sat in the passenger seat of Gun's sleek black car, you glanced out the window at the city passing by. the soft glow of the streetlights bathed the streets in a warm, golden hue, making everything feel a little more magical, a little more alive.
the atmosphere inside the car was just as enchanting. Gun had always been a man of few words, but tonight he seemed more at ease, more open. the quiet hum of the engine was accompanied by the faint sound of classical music playing through the car's speakers, creating a peaceful ambiance. you felt a sense of calm wash over you as you glanced at Gun, who was focused on the road ahead. his profile was illuminated by the soft light from the dashboard, casting shadows that only added to his already mysterious aura.
the restaurant was just as extravagant as you'd expected, with its towering marble pillars, crystal chandeliers, and tables draped in fine linen. evening went perfectly. you and Gun shared a bottle of wine, and as the evening wore on, you found yourself getting a little tipsy. it wasn’t enough to lose control, just enough to feel a pleasant buzz that made everything seem a little funnier, a little more relaxed. your laughter came more easily, and you found yourself leaning in closer to Gun, your hand occasionally brushing against his. he seemed to enjoy the relaxed version of you, a soft smile playing on his lips as he listened to your stories and responded with his own dry wit.
when the dinner finally came to an end, you felt a sense of contentment settle over you. the food had been exquisite, the wine even more so, and the company... well, there was no one else you'd rather be with. so you assumed that Gun would take you back to your home now, to end the night on a sweet note with a kiss or maybe something more at your doorstep. so, when he steered the car away from the familiar streets and onto an unknown road, you raised an eyebrow, but didn’t question him. the wine had left you feeling pleasantly hazy, and you were more focused on continuing your easygoing conversation than worrying about where you were headed.
“so, tell me,” you began, your words slightly slurred but still coherent, “why do you always pick these fancy places? are you still trying to impress me, Gun?”
Gun glanced at you, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “maybe i just like seeing you all dressed up,” he teased, his voice as smooth as the leather seats you were sitting on.
you laughed, leaning back in your seat and looking out at the unfamiliar road ahead. “well, it’s working. but you know, you don’t have to go all out every time. i'm just as happy with oversized t-shirt, most stupidest comedy and you.”
“noted,” he said with a small nod, though there was a hint of something more serious in his tone. “but tonight is special.”
you blinked, trying to process his words through the pleasant fog in your mind. “special? how so?”
“you'll see,” was all he said, and you let it go, too relaxed and warm from the wine to press him further. conversation flowed easily between the two of you as Gun drove. night seemed endless, the road stretching out in front of you like a promise of more to come. when the car finally slowed and turned into a long, tree-lined driveway, you began to wonder just where he had brought you. the driveway was impeccably maintained, with tall, ancient trees on either side casting long shadows under the soft glow of strategically placed lights.
Gun parked the car in front of an imposing mansion, the kind you’d only seen in movies. building was grand, with tall windows that gleamed in the moonlight and a wide set of steps leading up to the front door richly decorated with mahogany. you stared up at it, your slightly inebriated mind struggling to catch up with the reality of the situation.
“Gun… where are we?” you asked, your voice tinged with awe and a hint of nervousness. he turned off the engine and looked at you, his expression unreadable. “this is my family's home,” he said simply, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
your heart skipped a beat. “wait… you mean… we’re meeting your family? tonight?”
he nodded, his gaze softening as he reached out to gently take your hand. “yes, tonight. i wanted you to meet them.”
panic began to bubble up in your chest, but it was quickly tempered by the warmth of his hand in yours. the wine had left you feeling too relaxed to fully grasp the gravity of the situation. Instead, you let out a soft, nervous laugh. “well, you could have given me a bit more of a warning,” you teased, squeezing his hand as you tried to keep the mood light.
“i didn’t want you to worry,” he replied, his voice steady and reassuring. “you’ll be fine. they’ll love you.”
before you could respond, Gun stepped out of the car and walked around to your side, opening the door for you. he offered you his hand, and you took it, letting him help you out of the car. as you stood there, staring up at the mansion, the reality of what was about to happen finally sank in.
you were about to meet Yamazaki Gun’s family. tonight.
you took a deep breath, trying to steady your nerves, and looked up at Gun. he was watching you with that same calm, unreadable expression, but there was a hint of something else in his eyes — something that made you feel like everything was going to be okay.
with one last squeeze of his hand, you smiled and nodded. “alright then, let's do this.”
and to be honest, everything went better than you had expected. the Yamazaki mansion was truly grand, almost overwhelming in its size and elegance. the towering shoji screens, the polished wooden floors, and the delicate tatami mats all spoke of a family with deep roots and considerable influence. people you encountered within its walls — servants, distant relatives, or perhaps close family friends — were polite, yet cold. they carried themselves with an air of reserved dignity, their words carefully chosen, their expressions unreadable.
Gun guided you through the mansion with a familiarity that showed he had once called this place home. as you walked, you couldn't help but notice how much Gun resembled his father. the elder Yamazaki was a stoic man, tall and imposing, dressed in a traditional black kimono with a hakama. he carried an aura of authority, and though his demeanor was stern, there was something in his gaze — something that hinted at a really small softness beneath his cold exterior.
Gun's mother, on the other hand, was an elegant woman, the very picture of grace and strictness, wearing a beautiful, intricately patterned kimono. her hair was pulled back in a traditional style, and her movements were precise and measured. her eyes were sharp, watching you with an intensity that made you feel as if you were being evaluated at every turn. yet, despite the coldness in her gaze, she followed every formality with exacting precision, treating you with the respect and courtesy befitting a guest in their home. she spoke little, but when she did, her words were measured and polite, though they lacked any warmth.
as the evening drew to a close, and the final course after small greeting tea ceremony was cleared away, you felt a sense of relief. it hadn’t been as daunting as you’d feared, and you were proud of how well you’d handled yourself. you expected that Gun would now take you back home, and the two of you would quietly slip away from all formalities and coldness of this house. but then Gun’s father, in his deep, commanding voice, made a suggestion that took you by surprise. “why don’t the two of you stay the night? it’s late, and it wouldn’t be wise to drive in your current state.”
you glanced at Gun, waiting for him to politely decline, but to your shock, he simply nodded. “we’ll stay.”
you blinked in surprise, a slight panic rising in your chest. you were unprepared for an overnight stay, and the idea of spending the night in Gun’s childhood home — under the same roof as his parents — was suddenly very intimidating. you opened your mouth to protest, but Gun leaned in close, his breath warm against your ear as he whispered, “don’t worry. my father asked us to stay because he wants to discuss some business matters with me in the morning. just relax.”
· ┈┈┈┈┈┈ · ꕥ · ┈┈┈┈┈┈ ·
with those words echoing in your head, you found yourself sitting on the edge of the futon, carefully prepared by the staff just a few minutes ago. the evening had been long and emotionally exhausting, but now, in the quiet of Gun’s childhood room, you felt a sense of calm begin to wash over you. after taking a shower, you had washed off the remnants of your makeup, feeling refreshed as the warm water rinsed away the day’s tension. the pleasant residue from the alcohol was still making itself felt, leaving you relaxed as you climbed into bed, where your boyfriend was already waiting for you.
Gun was lying on his back, his dark hair still damp from his own shower, his yukata loosely tied around his waist. as you slid under the covers, you immediately fell into his arms, finding comfort in the warmth of his embrace. you settled comfortably against his chest, inhaling the clean, subtle scent of his shower gel, mingled with the familiar warmth of his skin. it was a scent that was unmistakably his, grounding you in the moment as you let out a contented sigh.
for a few moments, neither of you spoke, simply enjoying the quiet intimacy of being alone together. the soft rustle of the futon as you shifted closer, the gentle rise and fall of Gun’s chest under your cheek — it all felt so peaceful, so right.
but as the silence stretched on, a small thread of anxiety began to tug at the back of your mind, and you couldn’t help but voice the question that had been lingering in your thoughts all evening. “do you think your parents liked me?”
Gun’s chest rumbled with a soft chuckle, and you felt his hand gently stroke your hair. “why do you ask? you were amazing tonight.”
“i just… i don’t know,” you murmured, feeling a little self-conscious. “your father was so serious, and your mother barely smiled. i couldn't tell what they were thinking.”
he let out another soft laugh, tilting your chin up so you could meet his eyes. “that’s just how they are. don’t take it personally. my father rarely smiles, and my mother… well, she’s always been a bit strict. but trust me, you made a good impression.”
you felt a wave of relief at his words, but you couldn’t resist teasing him a little: rolling onto your stomach, you now lay on top of him, folding your arms across his chest and resting your chin on them, you playfully asked "are you sure they're not just being polite to me?"
flicking your nose with his finger, he just laughed in response, the sound deep and genuine, and you couldn’t help but join in, the last remnants of your nerves melting away in the warmth of his laughter. but as your soft giggles subsided, the mood shifted, the lightheartedness giving way to something more intense. Gun’s eyes darkened - more, if it was even possible - as he looked at you, his playful expression fading into one of pure desire. without warning, he moved, his hands gripping your waist as he flipped you onto your back. you let out a surprised gasp, your heart skipping a beat as he loomed over you, his body pressing you into the futon. the sudden shift in his demeanor left you breathless, a thrill of anticipation coursing through you as his face hovered inches from yours.
“Gun…” you whispered, your voice barely audible as he lowered his head, his lips brushing against your neck.
“mmm?” he hummed in response, his breath hot against your skin as he began to trail kisses along the curve of your throat. his hands moved with a deliberate slowness, slipping beneath the folds of your yukata to find the smooth skin of your back. you shivered at his touch, your body responding to the gentle caress of his fingers as they traced a path up and down your spine. his kisses grew more urgent, more passionate, as if he couldn’t get enough of you. he buried his face in the crook of your neck, his lips moving hungrily against your skin as his hands roamed freely over your body. the fabric of your yukata shifted as he explored, his touch sending sparks of pleasure racing through your veins.
“Gun,” you gasped again, your fingers tangling in his raven hair as you arched into him, craving more of the sensation he was drawing from you. his hands were everywhere, gliding over the curve of your back, sliding down to cup your ass cheeks before moving up again, each touch sending shivers of pleasure rippling through you.
he pulled back slightly, his breath coming in shallow pants as he gazed down at you — your hair, disheveled and slightly damp from the shower, was scattered across the pillows, your breathing was a little ragged and the fabric of your yukata, pulled to the side, opened up a beautiful view of your chest, which was slightly heaving from confusion, your cheeks were burning with excitement and still a small amount of embarrassment, while due to the alcohol you barely remembered where you both were.
with a quiet growl, Gun again clung to your collarbones, his hands moved faster, skillfully, undoing the ties of your robe with practiced ease to pull the unnecessary fabric lower. without moving away from you even for a centimeter, he caressed your neck with his lips, moved up a little higher, biting the lobe of your ear and descending in a wet path lower, again to the collarbones, this time not lingering there, but going lower to your chest, clasping it with one hand and kneading it in his large, calloused palm. with each of his movements, you moved towards him more and more, forgetting yourself and melting in his arms, moaning from his each touch.
as he skillfully make the fabric fell away, leaving you exposed beneath him, he groaned softly, his eyes drinking in the sight of you.
“you are so beautiful” he murmured, his voice filled with reverence as he leaned down to capture your lips in a searing kiss. your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer as you melted into the kiss, losing yourself in the sensation of his mouth on yours, his hands on your body. right now there was only Gun, his touch, his warmth, the overwhelming passion that consumed you both.
“please” you whispered into his lips as he rose above you on his elbows again. one of his hands had already slid below your tummy, stroking your pussy with his entire palm, only fleetingly touching the sensitive bundle of nerves, pulling the first loud moan out of you.
“come on kitten, be quiet, you remember where we are” Gun's hot whisper enveloped your ear as his fingers continued to play with your wet pussy. “you know, this is a traditional old style house, the walls here are extremely thin” your boyfriend continued to whisper in your ear, enjoying your once again confused look as your cheeks flushed with renewed vigor. “you don't want anyone to hear us, do you, baby?” now one of his fingers slid up and down between your lips, smearing the moisture oozing out of you all over the entrance. he was lying on his side next to you, one of his hands reached under your neck as he place one finger in your mouth, making you suck and lick it with your tongue, while his other hand never left your pussy, now more insistently stroking and massaging your clit with one finger, while the other played with your tight entrance, pushing finger in just halfway.
time seemed to stand still as you surrendered to him, your body responding to his every caress and touch, every kiss, every whisper. the intensity of the moment, the way he made you feel cherished, desired, loved—it was all-encompassing, leaving you breathless and yearning for more.
and that's when you reached your first peak from his fingers caressing you deep inside, when your hot and wet walls tightened around him, and you could no longer stifle your moans with his fingers behind your cheek, only then Gun smiled insidiously, and with one light movement turned your softened body back onto your stomach. without wasting a second, his hands dug into the soft skin of your sides, right where he could feel the pelvic bones, and with your clouded brain you already assumed that there would be traces there in the morning. reaching for a pillow, and pushing it between your thighs and the futon, Gun hurriedly, casually stroked your pussy, passing from bottom to top, collecting all the juices of your previous orgasm, simultaneously stroking his cock, smearing mix of your saliva and his own spit along the entire length.
whimpering softly and burying your head in the pillow, in an attempt to stifle your moans, you gasped, clutching at the edges of the futon and the blanket under you, as the fat tip of his dick slowly squeezed into your tensed, gummy folds, painfully stretching you. a deep and heavy moan was heard from behind when Gun collapsed on top of you with all his weight, completely plunging his fat dick into your bosom, in one sharp movement, immediately hitting the g-spot, forcing you to arch your back, pressing your ass harder into his hips. with a satisfied purr, Gun covered your hands with his own, fastening them together into a lock, again leaning closer to you with his all body, pressing you into the thin mattress, he began to slowly move inside your warmth.
with each strong thrust, as he picked up speed, with each of his heavy breaths into your neck, it became harder for you to hold your ass higher, as well as your moans, almost drowned out by the pillow. over and over, as Gun's thick cock filled your gummy, warm walls completely, your eyelids grew heavy and your head fell back, right on his shoulder, as your jaw dropped, allowing sweet moans and whimpers to escape from your throat.
“kitten still wants the whole house to hear her, mm?” your boyfriend purrs breathlessly in your ear, mercilessly hammering into your poor pussy, forcing you to give up, and fall on the bed with your whole body, and only moan piteously when one of his arms wraps around your neck and closes your mouth, and the other one gets tangled in your hair, pulling it back just a little.
you never doubted that in the matter of bed, Gun always was a bit more wild and animalistic, but the way his hips slammed into you now, how heavy balls were beating against your clit, and the dirty sounds of squelching and slapping skin against skin, how his biceps tensed right where your cheek lay, all this made your eyes roll up to the back of your head and just whine pathetically under him and drool on his muscles.
you didn't even have the strength left, to hold still, all that helped him mercilessly hammer you into the mattress was the pillow under your hips while you lay under him and helplessly muttering incoherent words and praises. both intoxicated by the euphoria of sex, emotions and feelings, the two of you have lost your sense of time and space, just chasing your own peak and pleasure. to be honest, you didn't think much when your pussy covered Gun's twitching dick with cream, when he hitted his pink head right to the cervix, forcing you to scream and arch towards him, pressing your ass into his hips, and feel with your shoulder blades as his chest pressing you into bed.
and to be completely honest, you almost didn't remember how you both cum, the most important thing that was in front of your eyes was Gun's chest and his warm hand gently caressing your back, while he murmured something into your hair, when he covered you both with a blanket and you fell into a sweet sleep.
· ┈┈┈┈┈┈ · ꕥ · ┈┈┈┈┈┈ ·
BONUS ;
the morning sunlight filtered softly through the shoji screens, casting a gentle glow over the room. you blinked awake, feeling the warmth of the futon and the lingering scent of Gun beside you. but as you turned over, reaching out to pull him closer, you found his side of the bed empty and cold. confusion washed over you as you sat up, realizing he was gone.
events of the night before came rushing back, and a deep blush crept over your cheeks. you buried your face in your hands, mortified at the thought of facing anyone after what had happened. Gun's parents, the staff — how could you possibly look them in the eye now? the thought of leaving the room made your heart race with anxiety, so you resolved to stay put, hoping to avoid any awkward encounters. minutes ticked by, each one stretching out into what felt like an eternity. you had no idea where Gun had gone or when he'd be back, leaving you in an uncomfortable solitude.
and just as you were about to retreat further under the covers, there was a soft knock at the door. your heart skipped a beat, dread pooling in your stomach. before you could respond, the door slid open, and Gun’s mother stepped inside.
she was impeccably dressed, her expression calm and composed. you immediately lowered your gaze, unable to meet her eyes, but she approached with a certain grace, her footsteps barely making a sound on the tatami mats.
“good morning,” she greeted you, her voice steady.
“m-mrs. Yamazaki,” you stammered, still unable to look up. “i-i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to-”
“stop,” she interrupted, her tone firm but not unkind. “you have nothing to be sorry of. it’s natural.”
you finally dared to glance up at her, confusion flickering in your eyes. she took a seat beside you on the futon, her movements deliberate and serene. “you’re a woman, and you’re desired and loved. there’s nothing shameful about that. that’s just the nature of men — wild and unbridled when a woman is around. i was in your place once, and someday, you’ll be in mine.”
you blinked, taken aback by her words. was that… a blessing?
“wait,” you began hesitantly, “so… you heard everything?”
mrs. Yamazaki let out a soft sigh, a hint of amusement flickering in her eyes. “i’m not an idiot. from beginning i saw the way my son looks at you. and i know Yuzuru well enough, and what’s going on in his head, to prepare your bedroom far away from our own.”
your cheeks burned hotter, the mortification almost unbearable. “so… you didn’t hear?”
she paused, a knowing smile tugging at the corner of her lips. “let’s say the whole mansion didn’t hear you… but maybe some part of it did.”
you swore you caught a fleeting, light, and kind laugh in her voice, and for a moment, the tension between you eased. there was a warmth in her tone that you hadn’t expected, something almost motherly and understanding.
“i...” you trailed off, still unsure of what to say.
mrs. Yamazaki reached out, gently placing a hand on your shoulder. “you are welcome here, as long as you make my son happy. and believe me, i haven't seen him this happy in a very long time.”
her words soothed some of the anxiety gnawing at you, and you managed a small, grateful smile. “thank you.”
she nodded, standing up gracefully. “now, come along. breakfast is ready.” as she turned to leave, you felt a sense of relief, the earlier embarrassment slowly fading.
· ┈┈┈┈┈┈ · ꕥ · ┈┈┈┈┈┈ ·
author's note 3 ; I FOUGHT INNER DEMONS TO FINISH IT I SWEAR!! SORRY THAT SPICY PART WASN’T THAT JUICY AND STUFF, I STILL NEED TO LEARN HOW TO WRITE PORN…HOPE U GUYS LIKE IT😤😤🫶🏻
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