#just not always a lot of outlets to vent on ‘real’ social media and sometimes a guy just gotta complain to complain

[godforsakenprospero]

realized that instead of coping with holiday stress, familial strife, and the near hate crimes of it all with sadposting on main I’ve been coping by TADposting on main.

[daastann]

Back in the day, I used to vent a lot on Tumblr and maybe I still do. I remember people getting tired of it, and honestly, I get it. Without any context, it probably came across as endless complaining and whining. But to anyone who ever thought that: piss off.

I said a lot of negative things about my dad, my parents in general, and my life. A lot of it was about men too. They never really understood, and I was terrible at explaining myself, putting my thoughts and feelings into words has always been hard for me. And let’s be real, the only place I ever “complained” was on Tumblr, to a bunch of strangers I’d never meet in real life. If I deleted my blog tomorrow, we’d all disappear from each other’s lives like it never happened. I was just another random person. Clearly, I let it get to me because here I am, writing about it today.

Tumblr has been a bittersweet experience. While I can admit that I could have approached my life differently, I can only say that now as a 29 year old. Back then, I really didn’t know any better. The things I’ve learned, the way I feel about everything now, it makes me want to hug my younger self. Sometimes, all I wanted was to be heard. As an only daughter and a middle child, I often felt like no one was really listening to me. Social media became my outlet, a space where I could feel like someone, somewhere, might actually hear me. I wouldn’t necessarily say I feel like that now, though.

I don't know where I'm going with this and maybe I should have written this in my journal. Oh well.

[beacon-lamp]

Thoughts on dreams response?

so i read the 19 page paper and then watched dream’s response video.  don’t really know what the discourse surrounding his response is bc ✨i don’t care enough to go purposefully looking for it ✨

my overall thoughts on the Entire Situation under the cut because i talk A Lot:

first and foremost, the math in the paper is Incredibly Thorough.  dream gave the Abridged Version in his video bc i doubt most people read the entire thing.  but if you read the paper, you’ll see the author point out what calculations the mods did wrong and, more importantly, why they were wrong and how they fixed it.  you’ll also notice that they mentioned several times that the results the author calculated did match some of that of the mods’ calculations.  we love reproducibility.

questioning the credibility of the author is a waste of time and energy.  they’re Anonymous for a reason.  imagine getting a fucking doctorate in statistics (an additional 4-8 years of study after college in the US) and your biggest paycheck of the year comes from some dude in florida who plays minecraft for a living.  jokes aside, you can argue in circles about “oh dream bribed the expert” but the intentions of the author and purpose of the paper are clearly stated in the first couple pages.  before all the math stuff.  people were so quick to believe the stuff in the paper the volunteer mods put out.  why not believe the expert too?

there is a greater lesson here to be learned about bias.  both for and against dream.  it was Incredibly Concerning to see So Many People immediately jump to “dream cheated 100%” or “dream would never cheat he’s the best” before understanding all of the facts.  i’ll admit, even i fell into this trap before i took a step back from the situation to look at the big picture.  we all have biases, many of which we aren’t even aware of.  but it’s always important to recognize those biases and account for them as much as possible before drawing conclusions, especially those that have real world implications.  it’s also important to listen to Experts and those who Know More Than You.  sometimes you just have to shut up and listen.  you’re not going to know everything and that is Fine as long as you are open to Learning from those with credibility and knowledge.  you’re going to make mistakes and have opinions you’ll later look back on and *cringe* and all of that is fine because we are all Growing and Learning. 

aight let’s talk about the mods.  i’ve already like vented in the tags of a post from like 2 week ago and my point still stands.  statistics is Very Difficult to Do and unfortunately is an Incredibly Powerful Tool.  there is No Right Way to do stats.  the data is unbiased but the analysis and interpretation of that data can be.  once again, that’s why it’s important to account for your biases.  the mods tried.  i’ll give them credit, i really do believe they Tried.  but unfortunately trying sometimes just isn’t Good Enough.  statistics can be weaponized to push forward an agenda, whether or not the author intended it.  i know that this is “just minecraft” and it only affects “one person” but inaccurate publications or misrepresentations of data have Real Life Consequences.  one Disproven and publicly denounced paper had people Believing that vaccines cause autism, contributing to the antivax movement that is Once Again having an impact during coronatime.  the point is, the mods should’ve consulted a professional.  someone with credentials about their math.  there is no doubt in my mind that they knew the fallout that was to come.  the drama this would stir up.  there was Obvious, Documented bias against dream from the beginning.  i’m sure there were people who wanted to take him down at least a peg or two.  but once again, that’s no excuse to publish this without consulting a Credible Expert.  i’m going in circles now you get the point, academic integrity is Very Important.  also News Outlets have reported on this, overall shedding a pretty negative light on the minecraft speedrunning community as a whole, which also harms the mods too in my opinion.

finally, let’s talk about dream.  if you don’t like him, that’s fine.  it’s Okay to Not Like Someone.  to Stop Watching their content.  to Stop Supporting Them.  dream responded incredibly immaturely to this entire situation, as we have seen him do Multiple Times before.  personally, i don’t believe the excuse “i acted without thinking and i’m sorry” cuts it anymore, given his 14M subscriber count and 1M+ twitter followers.  he is a grown adult and should learn to conduct himself better publicly.  i have friends his age and this behavior in a professional setting, which for him twitter is because social media/ content creator is quite literally his job, would be Completely Unacceptable.  it’s perfectly valid to be angry and yell about it to his friends, hell i’d be Furious.  but he should know better than to tweet impulsively.  feel free to draw your own conclusions on him as a CC and public figure.  please do.  i know “cancel culture” has deviated from it’s Original Meaning (much like the term “stan” has too) but hold content creators accountable for their actions.  do not blindly defend him.  at the same time, acknowledge that he is a young adult who is still growing and learning.  these two ideas can and should coexist.  however, ***do not accept apologies that are not yours to accept***.  shut up and listen to others who know more than you about a particular thing.  think for yourselves.  draw your own conclusions but always be willing to Grow if/when you Learn New Information.

the world is Complicated.  i’m sorry.  i wish it were easier too.

in conclusion, i can’t believe *this* is the first time i’ve used statistics knowledge outside of an academic setting and in the Real World.  2020 is fucking wack.  if you’ve made it this far, thank you for coming to my incoherent ted talk.  no one is going to read this whole thing and i’ve accepted that.

[candicewright]

Hi. I wanted to ask how you deal with toxic fans and antis? Today I was called too stupid to be bxg and to ship a real person applying to some weird stuff. How funny it was when I found that this person followed the page of another cp. I mean: where is the logic? Lol. Like I think many understand that some candies are too overanysed, but we know it and make fun of ourselves being so delulu. But then then I get many messages by toxic solo for being too stupid. I should block them? But sometimes I just can’t keep it and want to argue. Sorry for this sounds more how spam. Happy New Year

I admittedly haven't had such a bad experience as what you're describing, maybe because my blog is not exclusively bjyx related or maybe for another reason. I'm sorry that you had to deal with that and know that you're not stupid. Yes, some stuff is overanalyzed and silly, but we're here to have fun. Some things seem ridiculous but shaming others for wanting to believe in them is...not the way to deal with it. After all, all we have is speculation, and what candies you choose to take is your own choice. I have seen a lot of very anti-cpf people who follow certain cpfs and I also don't find the logic to that, but I guess some cpfs are more palatable than others to those who are outside of the fandom, and that's totally understandable.

But to answer your question, yes I do block them. Especially on Twitter because...wow. Here on Tumblr, I'd rather unfollow someone than block them, but if I ever needed to, I would. You really don't deserve all of that negativity and in my experience, it's better to not engage. If you need an outlet for your frustration, you can always create some sort of private social media. I for example have a private Twitter account where I go to vent to avoid getting involved in any discourse because I know in the long run, it's not worth it. That said, it's totally understandable if you do want to argue sometimes. Put yourself and your mental health first and do what you have to do to make your social media experience a pleasant and positive one💜

Happy New Year and feel free to come to my inbox any time!💜

[angelaiswriting]

It’s nostalgic bitch hours 🥰😂 under the cut because I might decide to delete this post one day lol

Idk if there’s any Italian around, but back in the 2010s we used to have this sort of Facebook world we called ‘the fake’. I accidentally logged into it this morning and boy, the wave of nostalgia that hit me... :’)

We shared the fics we were writing and posting online (EFP, the memories :’) and we made friends on there. We posted so much bs, but it was also a great outlet when we needed to vent. I was 15 when I joined in 2012, and I was still friends with my then best friend and it was the peak of our 1D phase and I thought we’d be friends forever and we had so many issues with teachers in high school and bs we didn’t like. It was the age of long ass phone calls locked in the bathroom and the tightness of the friendship was established according to what business you did on the toilet while on that phone call—I remember her saying “I’m pooping rn, I guess this is what real friendship is like lol.” She ended up hurting me deep inside and I already had trust issues, but she made them worse. But back then it felt so good, and even now I look back at it and I can’t but smile because damn. It truly must be friendship when you’re not embarrassed of the person on the other end of the line hearing you taking a shit 😂

But now I logged back in that account and I read some of the posts on my feed and despite the fact that many changed their names and I don’t know who the hell they are anymore, I was suddenly brought back to this part of my teenage years and I’m so fucking nostalgic it shouldn’t even be this funny :’)

I remember being that age and feeling like that age would never end, that I’d forever be 16 and I’d forever have those friends and I’d forever be writing fanfic (I still am, I’m just not writing in the same language anymore). And although I’ve always found Facebook to be a toxic place, that ‘fake’ was such a safe haven—and while I’ve never been afraid or embarrassed of posting shit on my tumblr, it’s not exactly the same feeling somehow, is it? And although I’m glad I’ve grown—and outgrown some people and situations and social media places, apparently—and that I’m doing my thing now and I’ve realized what friendships are and I have some great friends now, I’m glad I had that phase growing up. And it’s a pity I had almost completely forgotten about that :’) but I guess that’s what good accidents are for, sometimes.

Now I’m still writing fanfiction—on a different site than when I was in high school. And I’m still posting in the same kind of community—although it’s also completely different from the one I had back then, at the same time. And I still feel like I’ll be in my 20s forever and that I’ll go nowhere and that the problems I have now are the worst I’ve ever had. (You never truly change, I guess 😂). But it’s so weird to think that one day, ten years from now, I’ll be looking back at all this and I’ll be like. Damn. I truly was young, and look at the way I’ve come, at the people I’ve met, the things I’ve done.

2020 and 2021 have been weird years. I’ve been fighting with my mind a lot and I’ve also been silent a lot because I feel like I don’t have the energy for many of the things I used to do before (being social included, and I feel I’ve ruined some friendships because of the disconnect between what I want to do and what I’m actually able to do). But I sure do hope that I’ll manage to carry some of the friendships I have now into my future :’) now I’m alone looking back at how my ex bff and I used to write fanfic and all that happened back then, but hopefully this time I’ll have some of y’all to do this with :’)

[dejaaalm]

Fearless

I remember when I turned 16 years old, my mom brought me to Subway to apply for my first job. Applying and doing the interview was easy, but my first day on the job was really scary. I had so many doubts and questions. Was I ready to work? To make sandwiches in a fast-paced work environment? To provide good customer service? To count money and give back change correctly? I had all the thoughts and worries a 16-year old would have on their first day of working.

I remember the supervisor teaching me how to make all of the different sandwiches - this meat goes in here and this sauce goes with this. I felt fine at first because he was there to guide me. I felt confident and rest assured knowing that he had my back if I messed up. Two weeks after training, I was on my own. I felt lonely and unsure of what to do. I did not want to screw anything up. I still remember the first time I closed the shop all by myself. I had forgotten the password to the safe, how to alarm the store, and how to refill the pop machine. It was a disaster and I remember feeling so overwhelmed and afraid that I would get fired.

This experience made a huge life-long impact on me. The constant battle of feeling so fearful often wrapped its wings around me. When I got my job at Hennepin County in 2016, the adrenaline of fear slowly crept up on me again. My hire group and I were in training for about 2 months and then we were left to be on our own to prove that we were worthy enough to make the cut and be a permanent team member. Previously, probation was 6 months long. Training lasted 2 months and then we have 2.5 months to process cases and have them be reviewed. I needed to pass both months with a cumulative average of 85% or higher to show that I understand policies and procedures.

I witnessed people from the previous hire groups get fired. There were a few people in our group that got fired or left to find a new job. I was mad and irritated with health care policies and processing procedures. I wept and wanted to quit every day. I felt so neglected by my senior colleagues and supervisors. I felt like God left me there to be tormented and slowly die on the inside because every ounce of confidence and pride that I had left within me had gone out the window. I began to question my own worth. Am I cut out for this job? Do I suck this bad? Do these numbers and percentages really depict my worth?

I was angry for a while. One day, I was praying to God about how hurt and mad I was about the probation process. During my prayer, God revealed something so prominent that I will never forget. In the quiet, I heard "But this was the job you desperately prayed for a few months ago. This was the breakthrough you cried for. Now that you have it, you want to quit?" Right at the moment, one of my favorite Bible verses pierced my heart: Jeremiah 29:11. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Right then, I stopped crying. I stopped bickering. I stopped venting. I began to praise him and thanked him for all that I have been given. I promised myself that I would work harder and shift my focus from my defeats to my victories. I would allow God to use me, mold me, and take me to where I need to be.

That prayer led me to so many incredible experiences and connections with people at my workplace. This is not to say that I completely stopped feeling fearful, overwhelmed, angry, and anxious because I still feel all of these emotions from time to time. I still feel defeated and have lots of questions sometimes. The difference is that I have a better coping mechanism and I've learned to really do a lot of self-care. Instead of re-evaluating my entire life and mishaps, I focus on realistic goals that I can reach. Instead of feeling sorry or sad for myself when I didn't do something well, I focus on how I can improve. Shifting my mindset and letting God take the lead has really allowed me to take on opportunities at work.

I got two promotions last fall! I got promoted to be a senior and to be a mentor. I train new workers to potentially become a worker like my colleagues and me. I create training materials and activities, facilitate group discussions, train in-person and virtual training courses, and so much more. For the most part, I love my job. COVID-19 has really stretched my co-workers and me in a lot different ways on a personal and mental health level, but we're hanging there and doing our best to provide meaningful training content.

We have two new hire groups. Our Aug 2019 group completed their formal training and case reviews already but we are still providing support to them. Our March 2020 group started at a really awkward time. It happened right after Gov. Tim Walz ordered everything, except for essential workers, to shut down. We've been training everything virtually. We work with a very complex health care system so it's not easy training this stuff virtually.

Before the state was ordered to shut down all non-essential workers and employment, we were gearing up our Aug 2019 group for the formal period--that is to dissect their case work and look for errors. This process is currently on hold. I could see on their faces how stressed out they were. In fact, one of them broke into tears and walked out of the classroom a few months back because she was so overwhelmed by the amount of test evaluations they were taking. I was not there but when I heard about it, I wanted to hug her and tell her that everything was going to be okay. All of what they're going through right now is to prepare them to gain the knowledge and experiences needed for their future role as it has done for me.

I think our relationship with God is a lot like that. The beginning stages always feel like we're on cloud nine and things are going smoothly. We happily pray every day, sing songs of praise, read scriptures, and intentionally engage in bible studies with friends. We attend conferences, retreats, and worship events to be filled. We want and search for that feeling of "God is in my life and he's guiding me onto the right path." It feels good to have a sense of direction or feel that God is holding us in the palm of his hands. But what about when we hit rock bottom or get close to it? Or, how about the days when we feel like we're worthless, our life has no meaning or value, or you feel like no one cares about your passion and goals. Even in my own personal walk with Christ, sometimes I feel like that long lost and lonely 16-year old making sandwiches at Subway. I need someone to hold my hand. I hate the process. I hate the struggle. I hate what I'm going through. I need to be reminded of my purpose and that God still has a plan for me.

Often times, I was afraid. I was constantly afraid of doing things on my own, or facing trials and challenges, or trying new things, or believing that God really does have a unique plan for me. I realized that my biggest fear is actually not really a fear. I have a trust deficit. I don't trust myself, my skills and abilities, and sometimes, I don't even trust those closest to me. They say, trust in God because he has a plan for you. How can I trust in God if I can't trust myself and others?

Being fearless is something I struggled with. I'm afraid of so many things but most importantly, I'm afraid of my journey with Christ. I'm afraid to let God take control of my life. I'm afraid of being obedient because I don't know what's ahead of me. If you're anything like me, I like to read spoilers before reading a book or watching a movie or tv show. It is so weird but I do that all the time. I don't want to feel like I wasted my time on something so good but it ended so terribly.

It's easy to look up scriptures and read it and say "Oh, that was really good. I needed that today." This doesn't have any meaning. It's a quick "hand-holding" moment that often times lasts for a few minutes and is forgotten. One scripture in particular that has really been my living testimony the past decade is Joshua 1:9 - "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

When I was younger, I always liked this verse. I had it memorized and even recited it out loud whenever I was afraid. But to believe and trust in it was a different process. To see the word of God come to life and manifest in my life was compelling. This bible verse is no longer just an encouraging or inspirational verse. It's alive! It's real. Believe it. Let scriptures come alive.

I don't think it was the struggle of the work or the amount of work that I was afraid of; I was afraid of not knowing what will happen. I was already afraid of the possible negative outcomes if my performance was poor during probation. I was afraid knowing that I was on my own. But God says that we are never alone for he is always with us wherever we go.

During this pandemic, it is completely normal to feel fearful. It is our natural response to a global disaster such as COVID-19. Our social media and news outlets continue to feed us fear. We fear of being disposed to illness, fear of being sick, fear of dying, and fear of running out of food and supplies. Our entire focus is on social distancing and staying safe. Fear has consumed many of us. I encourage you to relinquish your fears today, whatever it may be or what it is related to, and let God take the lead. He knows your strengths and weaknesses and what you are capable of doing more than you know. When you let go and let God, you find the courage and strength to overcome your fears.

It’s easy to fall through the cracks and let the enemy seep through with lies and chaos. Whatever you are going through, know that God is bigger. I often tell my kids to trust me because I know what’s best for them and I know that they don’t know, so in essence, God is the same way. We don’t know what the outcome will be weeks and months from now, but we do know that God is loving, forgiving, kind, and faithful. Call unto him and he will hear you. I am praying for you, dear friend. Be fearless!

[haulix]

How to Avoid Becoming A Real Estate Agent

The following post was written by Rey Roldan, founder of Reybee Inc. and a longtime Haulix client. 

“What do you call an ex-music industry person,” a friend asked me recently.

“I dunno, what,” I asked.

“A realtor,” he chuckled, and took a swig of his beer. But then, almost instantly, his expression changed, his laughter stopped, and he slunk away.

The funny thing is, this friend of mine was once a really successful music industry guy, handling flashy names and pop stars.  One day, while doing his PR gig at a major label, he decided he just couldn’t hack it anymore. He walked into his boss’s office and gave two weeks’ notice.  He was done… spent… over it.  He suffered career burnout.

I ran into him at the bar a few more times that night, and each time he asked me about the music business. When I’d answer, I’d temper my responses so it didn’t feel like I was rubbing it in his face, but still, he looked more and more bummed out with each of my answers. I could tell he really missed it. I guess realty just wasn’t as sexy.

The older I get and the more years I log in as a publicist, the more I worry about ending up like him, getting burned out at this job…  What on earth would I do if I had to start over? And really, I hated the thought of selling houses.

Needing some sound advice and words of wisdom from editor friends and publicist peers who were still in the industry, I asked a few if they fear getting burnt out and, more importantly, how they overcame it, because, God knows, I have no intention of talking about square footage and how many parking spaces come with each unit.

Whether you call it Writer’s Block, work fatigue, or career burnout, the ability to “keep on keeping on” is something that every each one of us encounters. Whether you’re an editor, staff writer, freelancer, blogger or publicist, getting unstuck when you’re hopelessly trapped in a mental headlock is a very real and sometimes difficult obstacle to maneuver. How each of us deal with it was what I was interested in learning.

For some, like Jason Pettigrew, Editor in Chief of Alternative Press, the nation’s leading publication in alternative music, mental fatigue is easily overcome by completely unplugging and getting back to the basics. “Given the 24/7/365 cycle of the internet, burnout is positively inevitable,” he explained to me. “The demands of various people in a journalist’s life—management, readers, loved ones—are hard to navigate and negotiate.”

When I asked him how he avoids hitting that brick wall, he replied, “The best way I’ve learned to cope with burnout is to take a vacation from devices. Don’t go on a conventional vacation: stay at home and don’t plug your phone or laptop in for a day. Try it. See what you’ll actually miss. Don’t take your phone to bed; take the love of your life.”

Even though I don’t have a “love of my life” (unless my dogs count and cozying up to them in bed just sounds wrong), Jason’s advice about shutting out technology and unplugging for some time sounded like really great advice, though the thought of being away from my iPhone even for an instant seems like it’s create mass chaos and emotional decay for me.

I turned to my buddy Robbie Daw, Editor-in-Chief of Idolator, the uber-trafficked site for pop music and gossip. Like Jason, Robbie logged years upon years of employment in the industry. “In my experience, burnout can happen with almost any field you enter into — and I’ve worked in film, television, print and online journalism,” he told me. “What I always remind myself is that at the heart of everything, I’m a writer, and when I’m feeling a bit creatively spent at any job, I try to create some kind of other outlet for me to get the juices flowing again, even if it’s in my spare time. For instance, during my six years working at a print publication, Instinct, I created Chart Rigger, a pop music blog, at home one Friday night in January 2005. I still bang out the occasional post on there and work on other types of writing in my spare time, and it alleviates a lot of day-to-day job stress and helps keep everything in perspective.”

Personally speaking, when I was a full-time journalist years ago, I kinda did what both of those guys did but in a slightly different manner.  Since smartphones hadn’t been discovered yet, unplugging wasn’t a problem, so I’d walk away from my computer and ride my bike around Boston.  Or, since I freelanced for a ton of different magazines, if I hit a mental block writing one article, I’d switch gears and redirect my creative energy and work on another article.  Either of those usually did the trick.

But now as a full-time publicist, I was curious how my PR peers dealt with it.  Unlike writers, publicists suffering from a mental block aren’t just affecting their own careers, but their clients’ careers as well.  Our own paychecks aren’t the only things at stake… our artists’ livelihoods are too.

So I thought I’d ask a hot shit whippersnapper publicist like Tito Bellis who works for well-known and respected indie music publicity and marketing firm Big Hassle Media. Considering the level of artists they handle such high-pressure clients as Against Me!, Jimmy Eat World, and The Replacements, among many others, Tito for sure must come dangerously close to breaking point.  “Due to the sheer pace and pressure surrounding the job of a publicist, burning out from time to time is bound to happen,” he explained. “For me, this tends to occur more in the summer time due to every single band and their mothers being on the road, festival season being in full swing, and the constant expectations and requests being flung at you from so many directions.” I wanted to make a crack about bands and their moms, but before I could interject, he continued, “Making time for yourself is important, but from within the job, I try to do my best to keep my plate manageable and work to include projects that are a little out of my wheelhouse just to keep things interesting, challenging and personally fulfilling.”

Tito does raise some great points… I mean, at the end of the day, we work in music.  We make a living out of writing, talking, and plugging away about music. So looking within our own spheres and finding something in there to keep things interesting and challenging must be pretty easy. And unless you’re a glutton for punishment and only work with music you absolutely despise, finding interesting stuff in our own artists is a great way to liven things up.  I mean, think about it: Instead of balancing spreadsheets and discussing mutual funds, we shoot the shit about music all day. Whether we’re talking about the Taylor Swift/Katy Perry feud, oogling Miley Cyrus’ Instagram feed, or pitching the new Electric Six album titled Bitch, Don’t Let Me Die (yes, that’s the REAL name of their new album that comes out in October… Hit me up if you want a copy… Shameless self-promo.  Oops?), the fact that we write about, talk about, and listen to music all day is probably one of silliest ways to make a living… so why on earth would we want to jeopardize that career because of something as transient as burnout??

Sometimes though, burnout isn’t due to our doing, but something that happens as a result. When I asked my pal Maggie Poulos, founder of Mixtape Media, the awesome Brooklyn-based music boutique firm who handles The Fontaines, BETS and Bird Dog among others, about her experiences, she relayed a story that sounded pretty soul-crushing… though the silver lining is that she regrouped her energy in… wait for it… Fiji. “I have absolutely suffered from publicist burnout,” she told me.  “In 2009, I was laid off from a very high-pressure situation and was able to take some real time off and went to Fiji for a few weeks. That was instrumental in helping me overcome my burnout that time, but I can’t always take off for the South Pacific.”  If only… but if you can turn lemons into lemonade while decked out on a tropical beach with a toucan on your shoulder and a pack of hyenas dragging buckets of Coronas to you, why not? (CONFESSION: I don’t know where Fiji is but I know it’s tropical).  “Lately though, when I’ve felt burnt out, I’ve sought out publicist friends and asked for advice on certain situations. It’s always helpful to have a fresh perspective and some new ideas heralded in by others in similar situations.”  Seeking solace from publicist friends and venting is also good because you can bitch about clients and they’ll understand you without stopping you to ask, “So wait, what exactly is ‘lead time’?”

A lot of times, it’s not just the work load that causes a mental and emotional shutdown.  Journalism and publicity alike is rife with pressure to deliver, often with a client at the ready to constantly remind you of the impending deadlines.  Managing client and editor expectations while delivering our journalistic pièce de résistance or brandishing our PR magnum opus is a balance we strive for, but achieving it can be extensively draining and soul sucking.  

Detaching from the job, as Jason previously mentioned, seems to be the best way to relieve that stress and tackle it with a renewed sense of energy.  

Similarly, Maggie feels the same way.  “I’ve also made a larger effort to compartmentalize my work things and not let them bleed over into the rest of my life as they have in the past,” she explained. “It’s hard, but I find it’s better for me to stick to designated work hours. While it’s not always possible with this job, I do try to keep work in check. It’s also important to maintain a healthy social life - it’s always beneficial to me to remember that my life is more than my job. That all being said, music is still my passion and I still enjoy doing what I do.”

So with this precarious game of weights and pulleys, how does one stay connected and effervescent in our chosen careers… and is it possible to maintain a lifelong career in these fields? “I remember someone once telling me when I was working in print that most editors switch jobs within five years — and usually it’s to become a publicist,” laughs Robbie.  “Whether or not that’s the actual case, I don’t know. But I do see writing as a lifelong career for me. Whatever form that takes as far as actual nine-to-five jobs down the line, we shall see.”

Jason agrees.  Once a writer, always a writer.  “In the journalism world, I don’t think anyone in this line of work ever leaves writing full stop,” he says. “Robert Christgau [music journalist, essayist, and self-proclaimed “Dean of American Rock Critics”] is still very much offering his personal take on eras, be it his youth via his personal memoirs (His recent memoir, Going Into The City) and on things that are very much all about right now (his “Expert Witness” series for Vice). What’s good for music writers who are aligned to a particular era or movement, is the old adage of “history is what’s happening now.” Those who are entrenched in something are documenting history. Then decades later, when the inevitable revival or interest in a cultural adjunct is revived, consider who should be read – a well-constructed press release or someone who was there? I didn’t fully realize consider this until Alternative Press turned 30 and music fans and industry types reminded me of that scope.”

The publicists agree as well… It’s like a chosen field.  You don’t chose to be a publicist… it chooses you.

“I don’t believe this job [as a publicist] has a shelf life,” explains Tito. “There is always a story needing to be told and this is a job entirely based on relationships. So the longer you commit to it, the more valuable you are. Keeping up with the constantly changing climate (e.g. lower press budgets/decreasing editorial real estate, etc.) can be frustrating and exhausting in general, but those who can continue to navigate it successfully will find it to be a career they can enjoy for the long haul.”

“I’ve seen many people do this work for decades and on the flip, but I’ve seen plenty of people get burnt out and move on to entirely different careers,” adds Maggie. “I love music and cannot imagine my involvement with it not being a part of my career, but I am not certain that it will always take the form of working in music publicity.  We shall see!”

******

I ran into my friend again last weekend.  I asked him how the real estate business was going.

“Dude, I’m thinking of starting an indie label with my friend… Real small, working with local bands here in North Jersey, who don’t know what they’re doing, but at least this gives them an outlet and a sense of accomplishment, and it’s one foot back in the door.”  I could see some fresh life pumping behind his eyes. The color was coming back into his face.

“What about the real estate business,” I repeated.

“It’s meh… It’s a job.  But the label, I’m working on big things…”  His voice trailed off as he detailed excitedly all the plans he had.

I guess it’s true that one does not choose to be in the music industry.  It chooses you.