#just hang in there just a little more Matrix honey

[scuddle-bubble101]

Uh, Stick, you're needed on aisle pregnant hubby promto, probably with ice cream.

*He's already on it.

[leverage-ot3]

notable moments from The Ice Man Job

leverage 2.08

Hardison: Jim Kerrity III. He took over Kerrity Diamonds four years ago after his old man retired, and in that small amount of time, he drove the business straight into the ground by living way beyond his means.

(Parker is restless on the couch and Eliot pushes her away from him)

Hardison: I'm talkin' drugs, booze, women.

(Parker continues to moves restlessly)

Hardison: According to his credit card statements... What? Why? What are you doin'?

Parker: What?

Eliot: What?

Parker: What?

Eliot: It's distracting.

Parker: The couch is feeling a little empty.

Nate: Eliot, will you please sit next to Parker.

Eliot: No, I'm sittin' here now.

Nate: Guys, guys. We all miss Sophie. I, we just have to adapt.

Hardison: I got this. Move, go.

(Hardison sits next to Parker on the couch)

Hardison: You happy? (picks up keyboard)

parker can’t get comfortable because she misses sophie. she’s never had friends/close family before (minus archie but that’s irrelevant) and sophie was one of her people and she doesn’t know how to cope properly when she loses them

the ot3 sitting together as they should

- - - - -

Nate: You know what, the thing about this that people don't understand is insurance fraud, it's a lot of red tape, and with a big claim like this, it'll take a year before Kerrity sees any money, and the bill collectors are not gonna wait around. He's gotta fence the diamonds.

Parker: He can't. (grabs the remote and changes the monitors)

Eliot: What do you mean?

Parker: His diamonds are GIA certified, VVS clarity, all about two carats.

Hardison: That's my clicker.

Parker: Who stole the Polar Star? (raises her hand) Who stole the Gem of Gibraltar? Damiani raid? Me. I know diamonds, and our bad guy can't fence those diamonds because stones that size have an ID number laser-inscribed on them.

Eliot: So it’s like a stolen car. Gotta clean the VIN before you can sell 'em.

Nate: How do you get that ID number off?

Parker: With a special laser. But only three guys can do it. Antwerp, Dubai, Tel Aviv

SHE KNOWS HER DIAMONDS

- - - - -

[Flashback]

Parker: Hi.

Man: Hello.

Parker: Buy me a drink?

Man: You got it. (gestures to the bartender and puts his hand on Parker’s knee) So?

(Parker grabs his fingers and breaks them, then picks up a briefcase and hits him in the chest before heading away, almost falling)

we LOVE to see parker not tolerating slimy men and hurting them when they touch her

- - - - -

Parker: Yeah, I'll be fine.

(later Parker is crouched behind the counter talking on the phone)

Parker: I will not be fine. I stabbed that guy with a fork.

[London Bar]

Sophie: Parker, Parker, relax. It's fine. Listen. Go to Nate's cupboard and you're gonna find a sexy little mini-dress and my emergency Jimmy Choos.

[Leverage HQ]

Parker: Jimmy who? You have a body in Nate's closet? (she looks excited)

[London Bar]

Sophie: Shoes, Parker. Didn't I teach you any...? All right, listen. This is the important bit. Do you still have the Rosalind Diamond you stole in Perth?

[Leverage HQ]

Parker: Yes.

[London Bar]

Sophie: Wear it. The diamond will speak for you. You won't have to say a word. This is the key to the grift. You just trust the character. Say nothing, trust the diamond.

[Leverage HQ]

Parker: I can do that. Don't tell Nate I called.

[London Bar]

Sophie: I won't.

- - - - -

bruh parker is SO HOT in that blue dress with her diamond that she stole I’m-

- - - - -

Hardison: All right. Lay the arms down, brother. He's cool.

(Eliot lets Kerrity go)

Hardison: You have to excuse my bodyguard. He's touchy. It's 'cause he's a mute.

eliot looks ready to beat hardison’s ass for a hot second

also I LOVE eliot’s little braids in his hair

- - - - -

Kerrity: What kind of thief calls himself a thief?

Hardison: An uncatchable one with a brilliant reputation. You've seen my work in Perth. The Polar Star? Nicked it. The Gem of Gibraltar? Nicked it. The Damiani raid? Distraction while I nicked everything in the vault next door. Big stones, trust me.

(behind Hardison, Parker is pacing angrily)

eliot gives her a Look™ when she looks like she’s going to interrupt hardison because he KNOWS how pissed she is

- - - - -

(Parker is at the kitchen bar, locks and picks spread out in front of her. She’s focused on picking a lock)

Eliot: Ice Man?

Hardison: Hey, I put a lot of work into that character. No, no. No, I bought new clothes, ugly as hell, too.

Eliot: This always happens when you go on the grift, Hardison.

Hardison (*): I put stories on the website.

Eliot: You go too big.

Parker: Sophie told me to say as little as possible, let the character do the work.

Nate: When did, uh, Sophie say that?

Parker: A long time ago. Maybe last Christmas. I don't even think it was Sophie.

Nate: I'm gonna go put more pressure on Kerrity. I want you guys to be on the clear-out. Ice Man, play it cool. That's just an awful, awful name.

Hardison: Genius.

Eliot: See?

Hardison: It's genius.

Eliot: When you get in too deep on this, I ain't bailin' your ass out.

Hardison: I don't need you to bail me out. I'm the Ice Man.

Eliot: Not. Gonna. Help

parker picks locks when she’s upset/annoyed/distressed and I love that continuity for her in the show

also eliot you buffoon you’ll always help hardison you’re fooling literally no one

- - - - -

Guard: There's a Mr. Sterling here from the insurance company.

LMFAO NATE YOU DIDNT

- - - - -

Eliot (on phone): I know. He's driving me crazy. How, huh? I'm backup, they can't rely on me. All right, all right. Hey, thanks. Don't tell Nate I called.

Parker: Who was that?

Eliot: Cable company

eliot is more upset than anything because he’s been put into a position where he can’t protect them as well. THATS what he’s mad enough about to call sophie about it.

also this picture meme describes the situation perfectly

- - - - -

Eliot: Whoa! Whoa! What are you people doin' here?!

Woman: We work here. Who are you?

Parker: We're with OSHA.

Eliot: We issued a class-one evacuation notice for this facility effective 24 hours ago.

Parker: This place is on lockdown for chemical exposure.

Eliot: Nobody read the memo?

Parker: Did nobody read the memo?! You, cough!

(Parker holds a pad to the woman’s mouth and she coughs into it)

Woman: What chemical?

Eliot: Given the set-up for this place, it could be a matrix of solid phase sulfates, uh, nitrates.

(Parker shows a blackened pad to the woman)

Woman: That's inside me?

Eliot: Honey, your lungs are a parking lot, sweetheart.

Parker: And in that parking lot, the diagonal lines are painted with poison.

(parker turns and looks at eliot, who shakes his head slightly in exasperation)

Eliot: People, move towards the door, all right?

Parker: Do not inhale unless you are 50 feet from the entrance. Yeah.

(all the workers leave the room)

eliot just sighing at parker’s antics is beautiful

- - - - -

Nate: All right, nice work, guys. Tomorrow, when he shows up with the diamonds, the state police will be there.

[Exterior Street]

Eliot: Why, so they can arrest Hardison's ego?

Hardison: Be cool, baby. Ice cool. Hey, who wants to go for a spin?

Eliot: Can't believe you rented a Ferrari.

Hardison: Rented?

Parker: I'll get a ride home with Eliot.

(Eliot and Parker move away and get into his truck before driving away)

Hardison: Y'all are just jealous. Oh, they just jealous, baby. Don't worry about that. Look at ya. Lookin' better than green-

okay so now we know hardison in canon owns a red ferrari convertible

- - - - -

Hardison (makes call): Yeah, yeah. Sheila, not makin' it in tonight. Yeah, work thing. Bugger all.

[Interior Van]

Sophie: Hardison? Are you calling me in character?

[Russian’s Office]

Hardison: I told you, butternut. It's work. I can't get out of it.

[Interior Van]

Sophie: What accent is that? Ooh. Ooh, you've been nabbed.

[Russian’s Office]

Hardison: Afraid so.

Sophie: Is it the mark?

Hardison: No. No, muffin, no.

[Interior Van]

Sophie: It's the goons. You oversold the part.

[Russian’s Office]

Sophie: You fell into the trap of the overzealous henchman.

[Interior Van]

Sophie: Don't worry. It happens all the time. As long as they're not Russians.

[Russian’s Office]

Hardison: It's gonna be a bit of a problem.

Sophie: It's the Russians? I'm gonna have to phone Nate.

Hardison: Uh, leave it off, crumpet.

[Interior Van]

Sophie: No, no, no, listen. Hardison—

[Russian’s Office]

Sophie: --you cannot talk your way out of Russians.

[Interior Van]

Sophie: I mean, you can stall them maybe for a bit, but whatever you do--

[Russian’s Office]

Sophie: --do not tell them you can do anything else. (hangs up)

Hardison: Smooches. Love her. (puts down phone)

- - - - -

Eliot: I had courtside seats, man. Tell Hardison if he makes it out alive, I'm gonna snap him in half.

Nate: Uh, Eliot says hi.

again, eliot, you ain’t foolin no one

- - - - -

parker sitting on the dining table,,, I love it when she perches herself on things

- - - - -

eliot is wearing a checkered/white plaid shirt with flowers on it it’s adorable

- - - - -

(Kerrity is placing a necklace on a woman’s neck)

Kerrity: Wow, that looks beautiful. Three hundred thousand dollars on your neck. (Nate knocks on the door) Oh. Amy, I'm gonna meet you at the bar, sweetie, OK? You'll earn that later. Let's go. Excellent. This had better be important.

y’all nasty

- - - - -

we love to see eliot knocking people out with one punch

+ him apologizing to the unconscious guard after

- - - - -

(Parker lays a magnetic strip over the two halves of the sensor)

Parker: This will hold them together.

Eliot (hands her a screwdriver): Electric's faster.

Parker: Vibrations will set off the seismic sensor.

(Eliot leaves the vault as Parker moves the sensors to one side and replaces them with false sensors. She then works on getting the combination)

- - - - -

Eliot buzzes Hardison in. Hardison fakes punching Eliot, who goes down. Hardison continues to fake beating Eliot up)

Eliot: Next time, I'm playing the thief.

Hardison: I'd like to hear you do an accent.

Eliot: I'd like to hear you do an accent.

Hardison: I went to Second City in Chicago.

(outside the Russian and his men watch Hardison beating Eliot)

[Vault]

(Parker writes the combination to the vault on the handle in what looks like invisible ink)

Eliot: When’d you find time between that and karate at the Y?

Hardison: You know what? Just shut up.

Parker: Shut up, guys

chaotic ot3

- - - - -

(Parker hangs on to the vault door as it swings shut, then jumps to an overhead pipe)

[Kerrity Diamonds]

(Eliot watches Parker move across the vault in a security monitor)

Eliot: Stuck it

this is cute okay, his proud lil face

- - - - -

hardison also carries a black light on his keychain ???

- - - - -

I’m sorry, I’m but a simple wlw and parker hanging upside down doing her thing is beautiful

- - - - -

[Flashback]

Hardison: Shh! Do you hear that? Diamond Jim's comin' down here. You go and stop him while I nick the diamonds.

(the Russian and his men turn to the vault doorway. Hardison backs away. Parker steps out of one of the larger boxes and pulls Hardison into it)

Hardison: Thank you, and I mean thank you, but how are we gettin' out of here?

(Parker pulls out some sort of electronic device)

Hardison: What is that?

Parker: Shh! Pull your arms in.

(the device beeps as Parker enters a code. After a moment, an explosion collapses the floor beneath them and they fall into the tunnels below where Eliot helps Parker to her feet)

Eliot: Det cord.

eliot helping them off the ground? domestic ot3

- - - - -

Eliot: What are you smilin' at? You still screwed it up.

Hardison: I'm smiling 'cause you said if I got in trouble, you wouldn't help me.

Eliot: Parker made me.

Parker: No, I didn't.

Hardison: Come on, man. Let's hug it out.

Eliot: I'm not huggin' it out, Ice Man.

Hardison: Just hug it... Just a little man love.

(Hardison puts his arm around Eliot’s shoulders. Eliot tries to push him away)

Eliot: I'm not huggin' it out with you. No...

Hardison (stands to move closer to Eliot): It’s not—

Eliot: Sit down in your stool.

Hardison: Don't make this awkward.

Eliot: What are you doin', man?

Hardison: This is uncomfortable now.

(Hardison lays his head on Eliot’s shoulder as Eliot continues to try and push him away)

Hardison: Get in the pits.

Eliot: I'm gonna break your frickin’ arm.

parker shuts eliot down immediately because eliot needs to step up for his actions

ALSO, ELIOT LEANED HIS FOREHEAD IN FOR ONE (1) SECOND. HE TOTALLY SECRETLY LOVED IT

also this meme sums up the entire episode

* sorry the script said something wrong and I don’t feel like going back to check lol

[lilahdesignforperformance]

DESIGN MATRIX

CHARACTERS:

Physical characters:

Alannah Devlin

Fianna Devlin

Da - Peter

British solider

Mentioned characters not necessarily seen:

Mammy

Father Kearney

Maggie

CHARACTER CHANGES:

Alannah Devlin ( Early thirties)

Fianna Devlin ( Late twenties )

Peter “DA” Devlin ( Mid-fifties)

British soldier ( Mid-twenties )

Crocodile - Da

ALANNAH -

Clean (OCD tendencies), innocent (unsure, on edge), quite, polite.

Smokes secretly

Shuts down gets panicked from the fire alarm

Becomes fed up with Fianna

Over thinks which can be seen by her story about the lyrics from Africa by Toto

Becomes more and more agitated and uneasy

Alannah becomes transfixed by chaos

Loosens up which is seen as she takes swig from the bottle Fianna was drinking

Eats the chips off of the ground

Starts to drink more and smoke without trying to hide it

Stabs DA (character shift) - this is the turning point for Alannah and how she breaks out of the innocent, quite and polite shell she was living in

Becomes wildly drunk

Changes completely from who she was at the start as she now wishes pain on DA when before she was too afraid

FIANNA -

Aggressive behaviour from the beginning

Forward and confronting “i’m not gonna hurt ya, i’m just gonna bash your face in”

Expressive of her emotions 

Fianna switches from chaotic character to being the character with their head screwed on when Alannah becomes erratic 

DA -

Paralysed

Gunshot wounded

Bleeding out fast

Bossy

Rude

Controlling

Becomes legless after Alannah saws his legs off

Non responsive

Manipulative

COSTUMES:

ALANNAH -

Hair in Scrawny little bun

Puts a pair of marigolds on

Becomes covered in Da’s blood

FIANNA -

Wreath around neck

Dirty boots

Tattoos

Leather

Big hair

Denim

Gun

Cigarettes

Becomes covered in Da’s blood

LAYOUT OF SET:

Isolated farmhouse - refurbished in 70’s-80’s

Cream laminate cabinets, wooden table matching chairs, pale tiles, modest stove

Stage left door to outside world, with a small telephone table and mirror hanging above

Downstage right staircase and hallway covered by curtain

Upstairs over the sink, large window that stares out to darkness

Uncomfortably clean

Muggy

Shiny worktop

New wallpaper

Pristine

Toilet down the hall

Everything within the cupboards is colour coded

No bin inside

Chair that Da is sat on

Candles scattered across the room

PROPS AND USES:

Rock thrown through window

Stove - Alannah cleans it precisely and intensely

Eight packets of crisps which are referred to as sad crisps

Incense is lit becomes extinguished by Fianna

Rock smashes window (page 40)

Alannah slices bread - burns it

Gun in Fiannas pocket

Cigarettes DA rolls

Bottle of rum in wine glass

Alannah tops up drink, slices apple

Telephone - Alannah picks up, pauses, puts it down

Pipe on the table

Fianna has a chainsaw

Alannah drinks rum from the bottle

Alannah puts pot on stove

Fianna plays banjo

Fridge freezer stores a CD

Knife used to stab Da

Coin (heads + tails)

Glass of cold water (To revive DA)

SLK riffle at Alannah's head

Petrol bomb

LIGHTING:

Night (dark) - act 1

Occasional search light outside - Act 1

Weather begins to get worse, begins to get even darker

Cloudy weather outside

Light flickers - Page 76

Light flickers - Page 80

Light flickers - Page 88

Black out

Candle light

Candles go out

Flash of light - Page 114

Black out - End

MEDIA REFERENCES:

Thunder crackling (Act one)

Helicopter sounds over head 

Frog croak

“Some say the Devil is Dead” The Wolfe Tones

Window smash

The Shining

The Poltergeist

Fire alarm

Frog croaks again pg 51

Flush of toilet

Knocking from upstairs pg 57

Africa by ToTo plays pg 60

Both Fianna and Alannah sing

Music volume increases (come on feel the noize by quiet room plays)

Roof hammers

A gunshot pg 72

Water splashes onto floor

Telephone rings

Frog croak pg 75

Thundercloud breaks“Africa” TOTO

Turns of music

“You’ll never get away from me” by Tony Bennett plays

Turns music off

Storm raging on

Demented noise, from “Alligator wine” by screaming Jay Hawkins

Carrie

“O-O-H child” The Five Stair steps

Noises upstairs, noise upstairs stops

Pan smashes to the floor

Soldiers radio, speech and the static

Thud from upstairs, house shakes

Crackling on radioHouse shudders

Blood dripping

Predatorily breathing

Female screen from cassette player, scream melts away

Helicopter sounds overhead

Frog croaks

Chainsaw

EXTERNAL REFERENCES:

Set rural Camlough, south armagh northern Ireland 1989

Tayto Cheese and Onion crips

Superking Menthol Cigarettes

Ireland

Bible verses

Paras

G&T

The Clangers

Jay Hawkins

Armagh Jail

Newry canal

Chinless wonders

Armagh

Rachel O’Briain

Rachel Devlin

A Nightmare On Elm Street

Quiet Riot

Bible verses

Asmat tribe

Leviathan crocodiles

One Eyed Willie

Billy Connolly

IRA

Colossians: chapter three, verses twenty-two

Hitler

Bible verses/prayers

Children of the Corn

Brits

South Armagh, North Ireland

Corinthians: Chapter Eleven, Verse Eight

Empress Jaro

Psalms

MUSICAL REFERENCES:

The first song mentioned it Africa by TOTO. "Africa" is a song recorded by the American rock band Toto in 1981, for their fourth studio album Toto IV, and released as the album's third single on September 30, 1982, through Columbia Records. The song was written by band members David Paich and Jeff Porcaro. 

Lyrics:

I hear the drums echoing tonight But she hears only whispers of some quiet conversation She's coming in, 12:30 flight Her moonlit wings reflect the stars that guide me towards salvation I stopped an old man along the way Hoping to find some old forgotten words or ancient melodies He turned to me as if to say "Hurry boy, it's waiting there for you" [Chorus: Bobby Kimball] It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do I bless the rains down in Africa Gonna take some time to do the things we never had [Verse 2: David Paich] The wild dogs cry out in the night As they grow restless longing for some solitary company I know that I must do what's right As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti I seek to cure what's deep inside Frightened of this thing that I've become [Chorus: Bobby Kimball] It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do I bless the rains down in Africa Gonna take some time to do the things we never had [Bridge] Hurry boy, she's waiting there for you [Chorus: Bobby Kimball] It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do I bless the rains down in Africa I bless the rains down in Africa I bless the rains down in Africa I bless the rains down in Africa I bless the rains down in Africa Gonna take some time to do the things we never had

The second song to be mentioned in the play is Cum on feel the noize by Quiet Riot. Quiet Riot is an American heavy metal band founded in 1973  by guitarist Randy Rhoads and bassist Kelly Garni. The band is ranked at No. 100 on VH1's 100 Greatest Artists of Hard Rock

Lyrics:

[Chorus] Come on, feel the noise Girls, rock your boys We'll get wild, wild, wild Wild, wild, wild [Verse 1] So you think I got an evil mind I tell you, honey I don't know why I don't know why So you think my singing's out of time It makes me money I don't know why I don't know why Anymore, oh no [Chorus] So come on, feel the noise Girls, rock your boys We'll get wild, wild, wild Wild, wild, wild Come on, feel the noise Girls, rock your boys We'll get wild, wild, wild Baby! [Verse 2] So you say I got a funny face I got no worries And I don't know why I don't know why Oh I gotta sing, it's some disgrace I'm in no hurry And I don't know why I don't know why Anymore, no, no, no [Chorus] Come on, feel the noise Girls, rock your boys We'll get wild, wild, wild Wild, wild, wild Come on, feel the noise Girls, rock your boys We'll get wild, wild, wild, baby Come on! [Guitar solo] [Verse 3] Well, you think we have a lazy time You should know better I don't know why I don't know why So you say I got a dirty mind I'm a mean go-getter I don't know why I don't know why Anymore, oh no Come on, feel the noise Girls, rock your boys We'll get wild, wild, wild Wild, wild, wild Come on, feel the noise Girls, rock your boys We'll get wild, wild, wild Oh, wild Come on! (Come on!) Feel it! Come on! (Girls, rock your boys) Work it! We'll get wild, wild, wild (We're gonna get wild) Wild, wild, wild (We're gonna get wild tonight) Come on, feel the noise (Rock it tonight) Girls, rock your boys We'll get wild, wild, wild (Oh, yeah) Ah, ah-ah ah-ah (Whoo!) Ah, ah, ah Come on, feel the noise Girls, rock your boys We'll get wild, wild, wild Ah, ah-ah ah-ah Ah, ah, ah

The third and final song reference made in the play is You’ll never get away from me by Tony Bennett. Anthony Dominick Benedetto (born August 3, 1926), known professionally as Tony Bennett, is an American singer of traditional pop standards, big band, show tunes, and jazz. He is also a painter, having created works under his birth name that are on permanent public display in several institutions. He is the founder of the Frank Sinatra School of the Arts in Astoria, Queens, New York.

Lyrics:

You'll never get away from me You can climb the tallest tree, I'll be there somehow True, you could say, "Hey, here's your hat" But a little thing like that couldn't stop me now I couldn't get away from you Even if you told me to, so go on and try Just try and you're gonna see How you're gonna not at all get away from me Rose, I love you, but don't count your chickens Come dance with me I warn you, that I'm no Boy Scout Relax awhile, come dance with me So don't think that I'm easy pickin', the music's so nice Rose, 'cause I just may some day pick up and pack out Oh, no you won't, no, not a chance No arguments, shut up and dance You'll never get away from me You can climb the tallest tree, I'll be there somehow True, you could say, "Hey, here's your hat" But a little thing like that couldn't stop me now I couldn't get away from you Even if I wanted to well, go on and try, just try Ah, Rose and you're gonna see Ah, Rose how you're gonna not at all Get away from me

SPACE CHANGE REFERENCES:

Uncomfortable clean space “shinny, perfect”

Window in kitchen becomes broken from a Fianna throwing a rock through

Floor tiles become muddy from Fianna’s boots

Fire alarm ripped from the ceiling

Becomes smoky from cigarette

Pipe on table- Page 73

Smell of burnt bread

Table moves and becomes dirty as Fianna stands on it

Alannah opens all the cupboards

Crisps opened and crushed all over the floor

Hallway door opens as Da comes in

Blood begins pooling out onto the floor

Pot brewing on the stove

Da slumped in a chair in the corner, legless

Blood spilling out onto the floor

Stew all over the floor and pan is knocked over

Smokes comes out from the curtain

Leviathan crocodile in room

Smoke billows from behind the crocodile

Cupboard door is ripped off to barricade window

PHRASES/SLANG/TERMS:

Craic

Sacred heart

Mother Superior

Wreath off a hearse

Crown during The Famine

Dirty we tout

Firebug

Ye

Hold on a tick and a half

Okey dokey

Daft eejit

Crocodile tears

ALANNAH -

Polite “please, Thank you”

“Flipping sake”

“Oh whoop-dee-flippin-do”

FIANNA -

“Some say the devil is dead

“Thanks be to god”

“Pot fucking kettle, gin eyes” pg 43

“Taking the mick” pg 45

“Ireland, through us summon her children to her flag and strike for freedom”

“See you later alligator, fuck off crocodile”

“So you think i’ve got an evil mind (quiet riot)

“Ye daft cunt”

THEMES/GENRES:

References to mental illness such as OCD

Black comedy

Stockholm syndrome

Sister relationship

Reference to domestic abuse and pedophelia

Sexism

REFERENCE IMAGERY:

70′s Kitchen:

70′s Wallpaper:

Farmhouse:

Crocodile:

Lighting:

[lokisgame]

Some Things Never Change

A/N for @kiwiphroot who suggested a Matrix/X-Files crossover 

It was his first time in Zion, and the first thing that struck him, were the people, there were so many of them. All races, all ages, some with sockets in their heads and arms, some without. He followed Trinity through levels filled with life, with all its' scents and debris and usual everyday stuff. They went through living quarters, with lines of laundry hanging everywhere. They passed something like a market, where street vendors, for lack of a better word, sold food and hand made goods. Countless units were turned into workshops, manufacturing everything, from crafted spoons and pots to shoemakers and tailors, making and mending shoes and clothes. Everywhere, clients haggled for better deals, exchanging whatever they had for whatever they needed. "Man, some things never change." He murmured to himself, but she caught it. "Keep up." Trinity smiled and took his hand, pulling him through the crowd.

Three levels up, the elevator doors opened to a wide walkway, and he followed Trinity dutifully, though looking around curiously. He noticed mothers with kids waiting in chairs along the wall, the elderly and the injured, while men and women in almost white robes, walked among them, sorting them depending on the urgency and severity of their illnesses. It looked just like an emergency room, only more ragged. "We fixed you as well as we could when we found you, but every new freed citizen, must undergo full physical and psychological checkup." She looked over her shoulder and gave him a smile, or rather the corners of her eyes crinkled lightly, which for Trinity, amounted to the same thing. "Don't worry, it won't take long." "You have a med school down here too?" Trinity huffed out a small laugh and paused in front of unremarkable doors, knocking lightly. A female voice called for them to come in. "I'm telling you, Scully, it was real!" "Mulder, internet isn't good for you."

"Doctor?" "Hello Trinity." A small, red-haired woman got up from behind a desk, and the man she was talking to turned around, swivelling in his chair. "Zion's finest! Have't seen you around here in ages!" He cheered. "Which is a good thing." The woman finished for him. Neo looked at the bantering couple, trying to get his jaw off the floor. "We have a new crew member." Trinity said then turned to him, "Neo, this is Doctor Scully and Doctor Mulder." "I," he began, trying not to stare at the faces he watched on tv for what felt like forever. "Here it comes," the man, who looked like Mulder said, folding his arms over his chest, "c'mon, say it." "You were characters! On tv!" "We have a fan." Mulder chuckled. "We get that a lot." The one who looked just like Scully, if her hair was allowed to grow and her freckles to show, took Neo by the elbow, leading him to a nearby cot. "Sit down, let me look at you." "And breath, you're not crazy." Mulder said, turning a monitor to himself and began typing. It seemed to be wirelessly connected to a scanner that Scully ran over Neo's arms. Tip of the device touched each socket, and a new readout popped up on the screen. "Connections look okay." He said and Scully nodded. "Turn around and take off your shirt." Scully said, picking up a different instrument, one that looked more like a soldering iron. "This will feel a little tingly." "How does that work?" Neo asked, feeling a tickle skipping up his spine. "You guys were inside, weren't you?" "We were. Mainline?" Scully asked and Mulder whistled. "Wow, 99.9%." "Check again." "I did." Scully glanced over her shoulder to the screen, which Mulder turned for her to see, then they both looked at Trinity. She gave them a little nod. "What?" Neo asked. "Neuron network responsible for the input-output loop is very dense." "Think of it as having more bandwidth than anyone else." "What does that mean in here?" "It means, theoretically," Scully explained, "when logged in, you can process more data and do it faster, than others, giving you quicker reflexes and making your perception sharper. Possibly, even let you reprogram the matrix in close enough range." "It's a little fuzzy, how it happens, but it seems the machines wrote the code so that we can interact with it on a subconscious, instinctive level." Mulder said, typing, "You take a mug in your hand, start a subroutine with a list of actions, reach out, hand doesn't go through the mug, close hand, it's hot, it burns you, you drop the mug, it falls, run coin toss, it brakes or not." As Mulder spoke, Scully kept prodding at his back, lifting his arms, checking reach and movability of joints. Her hands were steady and warm, and soon she was done. "You can get dressed now." She patted Neo's shoulder and turned to her partner. "Look out, Mulder, someone might think you love the machines." "I'd call it knowing your enemy." Mulder chuckled and rolled his chair closer, taking her place. "So what are you saying, my brain is some kind of a super computer?" Neo asked, pulling the sweater over his head. "In sheep's clothing." Mulder replied, gently taking his face in his hands, tiling it back. "Open up." Neo opened his mouth, closed, followed the finger, squinted at the light, and listened. "With your potential capabilities, and awareness of the program, you could try and shape it, in real time, disrupting the pre-programmed cause-effect loops. Slow down or dodge bullets, walk through walls, even fly." "You're shitting me." "Why would I." "If I can do it, why no one else has tried it." "Oh, they tried it." Scully said, a little sad. "And failed, squeeze my fingers," Mulder said, holding his hands out, Neo squeezed. "Responses normal. She's the medical examiner too." Neo noticed the sockets, just like his own, on both of them. "So you guys were inside too." "Yeah." Mulder bumped the side of his hand just below his knee and Neo's leg kicked, "reflexes normal." "And you were actors? It was all just a tv show." "I wish," Mulder chuckled without humour, "I'd give myself a happy ending." "We were working for the FBI." Scully said. "Doctor and a psychologist, turned feds, investing the paranormal," Mulder recited in a tone of a b-movie trailer voice-over, "I'd show you my badge, but I left it in the pod." Neo laughed. "One day we found an artefact, and it had to be a virus of some kind, because it started to mess with the code around me, making me hear peoples' thoughts, that kind of thing. It put me in a hospital, almost catatonic from sensory overload. Then Trin found Scully." "And we pulled each other out." Scully finished for him, leaning against the desk. On a wall behind her, Neo noticed a drawing, just as the one he remembered, a UFO hovering above the tree line, bold letters at the bottom declaring 'I want to believe' Old habits die hard, he thought. "And you guys never knew it was a TV show." "It was to you, for us it was life." Scully said, as Mulder pushed away, back at her side. "Maybe the machines lacked the imagination to create something as abstract as entertainment, to fill humans' need for escape, and took our story to fed it to the masses. One thing they couldn't fake though." "They could never tear us apart." He said, kissing her knuckles. There was a small knock on the door, Mulder asked who was it and a small head peeked inside. "Daddy?" "C'mere Will, we're done." A little boy came in and quickly scrambled into his lap. No sockets, a real child, born outside. "Can we go play now?" The boy asked. "In a second, honey." Scully said, fondly ruffling his light brown mane. "So, everything looks okay, though your muscle mass could use some work. If you find time, I'd recommend physical training, a real one." "It'll keep you sane, and in touch with your physical body." Mulder added. "We lost quite a few, who couldn't handle the transition, so take this one seriously." "Thanks." Neo chuckled, looking from Mulder to Scully. "What?" "I find it hard not to call you guys Agents." "I don't think anyone in here would appreciate that title, and it's not like we were really a part of the system, since we broke free." Scully petted Mulder's head as well, and her smile was an order of magnitude warmer than he remembered. Trinity nodded in thanks and reached for the door, Neo got up to follow. Mulder got up with him, keeping his son in his arms. "Remember Neo," he said softly, "in there, you're as strong as your beliefs. We believe in you." They left the little family behind, and headed back to their living quarters. In the elevator, Neo took Trinity's hand, fingers twining with hers, her words echoing in his head. "The Matrix can not tell you who you are."

[theolivechickken]

Czeching out Prague

Feb 21

How am I leaving already? I feel like I just got back to Salzburg. What do you do in Prague anyways?

We accidentally got on the wrong train but still ended up going the right way. Realization that we were on the wrong one clicked right as the doors closed and the train started leaving the station. Did a little train matrix action to hop on one that would bring us to our next station to catch our original connecting train. We almost hopped off one train only to realize that we would be running to hop back on.

Yooo, these train cabins remind me of the ones in Harry Potter. Also, they are super hot. How do people sit in these during the summertime?

We were debating taking a cab to our Air Bnb, but saw that the metro could take us in that direction. Prague so far is a different vibe than Budapest. Maybe because in Budapest we arrived pretty much in the city and stayed in a central area whereas we immediately hopped on the metro to take us out of the city center and into the suburbs. It was quieter and darker, but we eventually found our way to the apartment. We grabbed the keys from the Magic Kellæ and trekked the 3 (more like 5) floors to our apartment.

Feb 22

I didn’t want to sleep the days away like I did in Budapest, so Bryn and I got ready earlier than the rest of the crew and strolled through the city in the morning. Much more livelier in the day and in the actual city! I really enjoy walking because I think it allows me to see more of the places that I visit. It also helps me to understand where I am on a map. We walked along the river, crossed a bridge, and found our way to the Lennon Wall. It was a bit chilly, but the sun came out for a hot minute and I almost felt like I could carry on without a jacket. But then the sun disappeared and it was freezing and windy for the rest of the day.

Bryn and I made our way up the many stairs to Prague Castle. We met up with Aubree, Raine, and Ayetzy. We walked through the church and seeked refuge from the wind in a little coffee shop. Can’t hideout forever though, and my stomach was rumbling for food. We made our way back to the Lennon Wall and got lunch at the John Lennon Pub. I ordered the Pie Madras and a Pilsner Beer (yummy!). The food packed a spicy punch too (reminded me of lamb curry or vindaloo) but I loved it!

We went back to rest and have some downtime before taking the metro to old town. We walked around the square and watched the Astronomical Clock as it rang for the next hour. Then we went to Las Adelitas for dinner. I was a bit skeptical about Mexican food, but it was actually really good. I tried the Tacos Al Pastor (tortillas topped with pineapple, onion, cilantro, red sauce, and slices of pork leg marinated in guajillo chili, achiote, and orange juice).

Afterwards, we went out on a pub crawl. It was pretty early in the night and quiet at first. But then things got poppin’ after we met a bunch of English folk. Can always count on them for fun company. We met good ol’ Londoners Tom and Ollie first at the foosball table. Definitely thought they were 22-24 but they revealed that they were 19 and had birthdays coming up in the next month. A crowd from Southern England later joined us too. 2 Joes, Steven, Stephan, Greg, and a couple other buddies of theirs. We had fun giving them words and phrases to say, and the two groups tried to help us understand the difference between their accents and slang :))

Feb 23

Bryn and I went out again in the morning to explore a bit. We managed to find our way back to the river just by remembering the route we walked yesterday. We stopped by the post office so that I could mail out a postcard to Nick (happy belated valentines day!). It oddly reminded me of the DMV. We wandered around old town for a bit and then got lunch at Restaurace Blatnice. I finally ordered a honey roasted Koleno (aka “Pork Knee”). HOLY PIG. Did not realize how much 1kg of meat would be until they brought out the plate. Hot damn I went for it though. Nearly ate the whole thing by myself. So good, but so much food. That was breakfast, lunch, AND dinner right there.

We walked across the Charles bridge, passed by the many street performers and artists selling their crafts, and visited a contemporary arts museum on the other side of the river (Museum Kampa). Later, we went back to the other side of the river to meet up with Raine, Tom, Ollie, Ayetzy, and Aubree. We tried finding a pub to hang in so that they could watch the rugby game, but so many of them were packed. We found a little corner in the basement of The Dubliner, and hung out in there for a few hours. Not gonna lie, I was ready for bed and it was only 6:30. I stuck it through for a few more hours, and then Bryn and I went out to grab a quick dinner and head back to the Air Bnb. Took the metro back, packed, and passed out.

Feb 24

YAY hopped on the right train! But there was construction on the track so we had to get off at a different station, hop on a bus to shuttle to a new train station, and hop back on a connecting train. At least the bus ride had a woodsy, snowy, scenic drive casually through the Czech Republic.

[barbecuedphoenix]

These photos aren’t from fairy land, actually. ;)  

The first was taken from Japan’s Ashikaga Flower Park, where one of the world’s oldest-living wisteria vines still grows (said to be planted around 1870). The sheer size of the vine has turned it into a major tourist attraction: about 1,990 square meters (or about half an acre). In fact, a matrix of steel supports was erected to keep the bulk of the vine from dropping to the ground, as well as to prop up the branches of that poor distant tree it’s hanging from.

Wisteria is a tremendously-hardy ornamental flowering vine, cultivated for about 2,000 years in China, Korea, and Japan before it was introduced to the United States (and other countries) around the 1830s. Unsurprisingly, it’s a plant that features heavily in Buddhism and Chinese/Korean/Japanese literary tradition. Its resilience and longevity has made it a motif of enduring love in Japanese art and literature, or more famously, endurance in the face of heartache. Shin Buddhism has also adopted it as a symbol of humility, wisdom, and reflection because of the way the seemingly never-ending vine supplely twines across trees, trellises, and even entire groves, always adapting to the lay of the land. (Not to mention that once rooted, it has the determination to stay there for the viewing pleasure of multiple generations.)  

Unfortunately, the wisteria’s introduction to the West has attached less benign meanings to it: most notably qualities like obsessiveness, choking passion, and runaway spontaneity. Credit Victorian Britain for not enjoying a lovely plant that grows like, well, the grandfather of all invasive weeds.

 The second photo was taken from a more generic, temperate garden with a healthy share of hydrangea bushes. (I couldn’t find the exact location though, or the name of the photographer. Still, it’s a quaint little shot.)

Hydrangea is a tall, woody ornamental flowering plant that also has its roots in Japan. Its English name though is very telling: derived from the Greek cognates “hydor” (meaning ‘water’) and “angos” (meaning vessel or jar), which when strung together gives it the nickname ‘water vessel’. This is because hydrangeas have flowers that (individually) are shaped a bit like cups… and they’re incredibly thirsty plants, requiring liberal amounts of water to keep those pompom-shaped clusters in peak condition. In a sweltering summer, the color actually starts to leech out of their petals until they approach washed-out gray.    

In Japan, this lavish flower has come to symbolize vanity and boastfulness, but also sincere gratitude for being understood (which makes it a fitting bouquet for apologies, at least according to one Japanese legend). On being imported to the West, this flower acquired still more ambivalent meanings. The cheerful Victorian British designated blue-purple-white hydrangeas as symbols of frigidity, even heartlessness. But nowadays, incongruously, it’s seen as motif of heartfelt emotions—both positive and negative--, and has even become a popular fourth wedding anniversary gift between couples, returning in a way to the original Japanese message of ‘thanks for understanding me, and sorry about the trouble so far’.

 Why this treatise on flower symbolism? Because a few people have already finished reading that last NSFW one-shot starring Ezarel, and I wanted to explain why I chose hydrangeas and wisteria to adorn the (non-canon) garden setting. It’s not just because they’re pretty; if there’s ever a pair of flowers that can symbolize Ezarel (and his screwy relationship with the prankster! Guardian), then it’s these storied Japanese garden fixtures.

Also, I owe an apology to some gentle souls for that fake honey drizzler catalog ad. Please enjoy the hydrangeas. ^_^  

Wisteria photo by: Takao Tsushima

Hydrangea photo source: titaniumvertical.blogspot.com