#jjba calamaro

[marschel]

The Squadra as it is in the future fic (first parts are being checked right now).

Check out Maro and Schel, our La Squadra OCs!

[marschel]

Figured they might look good as pop-art

[marschel]

when he's sleep drifting:

Six 100 word drabbles about the art of clown eepiness as written by @evil-milfs

taglist: @spacestephh

[marschel]

Unsurprisingly, Melone is the first to get interested in the clown duo. We'll be posting the fic in the near future (if SOMEBODY *cough cough* @melonbitter *cough cough* will check and approve it) so you can learn exactly what happened ;)

Calamaro’s Bio Muschel’s Bio

[marschel]

GAY KILLER CLOWNS: THE FIC, Chapter 1

Calamaro and Muschel are the newest addition to La Squadra di Esecuzioni, almost personally appointed by the Boss. They are a couple of inseparable murderous clowns, both enjoying their work far more than a normal person should. Unbeknownst to them, they are an insult to the injury of the execution of the team's former members. Naturally, none of their new colleagues like or trust them, preferring to treat them with caution and various degrees of hostility. The clowns take it upon themselves to change that through rather unconventional means.

Characters: La Squadra, Muschel, Calamaro Pairing: MarSchel (mild) Warning: homophobic language from Illuso, innuendos, Italian language Words: 4186 The clowns arrive, and so do the problems.

Calamaro’s Bio Muschel’s Bio

Link to AO3

The newly employed killers were standing right outside the very secret HQ-turned-frat house of the Hitman team. Both dressed up in clown bodysuits and covered with heavy makeup, they were hardly covert, but neither were any of the Passione members they’ve met. After all, who needs stealth when your very affiliation with the organization is supposed to inspire fear?

The test mission was a breeze, whether intentionally or not. After all, Muschel and Calamaro were killers long before even knowing about stands. Now, with these deadly abilities up their sleeve, they could be playing for real-real. The victims died quickly, and yet their final moments were so agonizing… Muschel was head over heels. If they had known this was awaiting them, they would have turned Pomodoro in months ago. 

“So? Are we coming in?” Muschel asked impatiently.

“Uh-huh…” hummed Calamaro. He was too busy fixing his hair to actually acknowledge the partner. “Hold it, I’m almost finished.”

“They’re mafiosos, not beauty pageant judges, Maro. Are you planning to kill people with your hair now?”

“First impressions matter, Schel!” exclaimed Maro. “We need to impress them! Fix your nose, you smudged- Hey!”

Muschel snatched the mirror from his partner’s hands and fixed the dot on the nose with lipstick.

“We look like clowns, Maro, we’re bound to impress. Now stop fussing over your frills. The sooner I can leave Risotto’s gaze, the better.”

“Now, we look like presentable clowns.” Maro took the mirror back. “Smile a little when you meet them.”

“No way.”

Da-dong.

Calamaro rang the doorbell. Just a few moments later, a small window just below their eye level opened, and a pair of black eyes stared back at them.

“Uhm… The password. Please.”

“Ravanello Malvagio.” offered Schel. “Your leader knows we are to arrive.”

“Yes! Right!” The man on the other side exclaimed, opening the door, and the clowns barely managed to keep a straight face. The man looked like a ravanello alright, a bald head with a long tuft of green hair sticking from the top. The outfit was composed a little better, although it left no doubts that the new colleague was something of a clown himself.

“Hello! I’m Calamaro. That’s Muschel.” Maro said cheerfully. Schel was just trying not to stare at the hair. 

“Pesci. Piacere.” The host answered, clearly embarrassed. The pair felt kind of guilty for making the guy feel self-conscious, but honestly, his whole look was beyond their understanding. Not that they disliked it, though. “Risotto is waiting.” He added, letting them in. “Leave the bags here, you’ll come back for them later. Uhh… Tea?”

The clowns shook their heads in sync. Pesci gulped and simply led them through the dark corridor. It was a sight both dreadful and comfortingly familiar, the littered space with walls dirty just enough to be called dirty, but not to the point of causing disgust. There was a gigantic garbage bag filled with beer cans and frozen food packages in the corner and a long list of domestic duties to fulfill with coloured highlights for, the clowns figured, different members of the group. The green ones were particularly common. The purple and pink ones were barely there. The gray one was only on the “paperwork” task.

Pesci led them to a heavy black door with a half-scratched-off sticker of a cat near the handle. The door opened, and the clowns met… the other clowns.

Muschel looked at the colleagues from beside his partner. Half of them looked like they dressed up in the dark with a gun to their head, and the other half – like they were starring in a burlesque show. Regular people might have found the outfits very eccentric. Muschel just found them to be a little boring. Other than that, Risotto was about as easy to read as a rock, like always, and the others’ facial expressions varied from disinterest to scornful evaluation.

“The clown school is on the next street.” said the handsome long-haired brunette.

“You a proud graduate?” Muschel answered in tow. A blonde man in a suit glared at them both then sharply nodded for Pesci to sit down. The ravanello-man did as he was told, nervous as ever. “Or were you expelled? We can tutor you, y’know. Start with fixing the sourpuss mug.”

“Schel.” Maro patted his arm. He just said how they should be making a good first impression, and this was decidedly not it.

[marschel]

what form of love does your ship embody?

thank you @roofgeese for the tag (i mean, you tagged one of us, but we assumed it was for these guys since we have no other ships of the kind?)

Tagging: @spacestephh @zarasu

love as violence

[ love as bloodshed, crimson as a knife slipped between your ribs ] when ocean vuong said "to arrive at love, then, is to arrive through obliteration" and when franz kafka said "you are the knife i turn inside myself; that is love" and when ada limon said "how do you love? like a fist. like a knife" and when richard siken said "sorry about the blood in your mouth. i wish it was mine"

the quiz

[marschel]

There may or may not be a gay porn fic with them in the future

[marschel]

Calamaro's Bio

Name: Calamaro

Nicknames: Maro

Name meaning: “squid”

Stand: Smooth Criminal

Age: 24

Height: 175

Affiliation: Passione, La Squadra di Esecuzioni

Calamaro grew up in a very normal environment. He was rather young when he realized his attraction towards men, and had a high school sweetheart. One night, as they were having a rather romantic walk, a drunk man attacked them. Calamaro fought back, killing the man in the process. Instead of being impressed, his boyfriend was horrified, calling him a monster and trying to call the police. Upon burying both corpses, Maro swore he wouldn’t let love decide his actions again.

He did, however, rather like the process. After running away from home, he decided to become a hitman. A few years later, he was hired by a Passione capo by the name of Pomodoro. Together with Muschel, they were paid to eliminate some personal enemies of the capo. Despite the unpleasant pairing and having to wear a clown suit, Maro got used to the job.

His feelings towards his work partner, however, were much more complicated. Internally, he was beating himself up; he did not simply feel attraction to Muschel, but, apparently, was becoming actually attached to the man. Calamaro was convinced that Muschel was incapable of love and was probably still harboring plans to kill him. When Schel, shocked by his own actions, proved him wrong, Maro immediately forgot about his precautions and confessed his feelings. Thus, their relationship began.

When Pomodoro’s dealings on the side were discovered by the Boss, he struck a deal with the clowns. They were to kill their former employer and prove they’re worthy of joining Passione or join the traitor on the bottom of the sea. Naturally, they chose what they chose – they never liked Pomodoro anyways.

[marschel]

Hello!

We are Takii (@takiisieju) and Lipwig (@melonbitter) and this is a blog dedicated to our JJBA: Golden Wind OCs, Calamaro and Muschel.

Calamaro and Muschel are the newest addition to La Squadra di Esecuzioni, appointed by the Boss, almost personally. They are a couple of inseparable murderous clowns, both enjoying their work far more than a normal person should.

Unbeknownst to them, they are an insult to the injury of the team former members' execution. Naturally, none of their new colleagues like or trust them, preferring to treat them with caution and various degrees of hostility. The clowns take it upon themselves to change that through rather unconventional means.

Feel free to send asks and tag us in tag games. We’ll be happy to see you around. Please note that this blog is 18+ and its content may be triggering as the story contains stuff like violence and murder.

[marschel]

GAY KILLER CLOWNS: THE FIC, Chapter 2

Characters: Muschel, Calamaro Pairing: MarSchel (explicit) Warnings: smut, murder talk, detailed descriptions of violence, Italian language, German language Words: 2357 Taglist: @spacestephh THE CLOWNS ARE FUCKING

Calamaro’s Bio Muschel’s Bio

Link to AO3

Update: We added translation of Italian and German words!

[marschel]

👁️ EYE

What colour are their eyes? do people notice their eyes? is there anything special about them (shows emotion easily, literally magical...)?

Calamaro's eyes are a rare shade of light green, very magnetic and unforgettable. He also has very long eyelashes.

Muschel's eyes are plain black. Nothing special aside from the long lashes. Except for when they light up at the prospect of a kill.

🤥 LYING

Are they good liars? Do they have tells to show they're lying?

Calamaro is very good at lying, except he looks too pleased with himself.

Muschel is pretty good at lying since he doesn't feel any remorse about it (unless it's to Maro, so he never lies to Maro).

👻 GHOST

do they believe in ghosts? what are their "ghostly experiences", if any?

Calamaro says he doesn't believe in ghosts, but actually does. 

Muschel doesn't believe in anything supernatural. It's easier to be in his line of work if you think there's nothing bigger than a man out there. 

Ask game

[marschel]

how do strangers view your OC?

Calamaro: the ground beneath us is solid

sitting under a tree in summer. the sound of light rain on a metal roof and old wooden coffee tables. getting so absorbed in a story that hours pass without you noticing. you probably judge people who don't use coasters. your best feature is your hands. you're often pretty logical, but you're also very gentle. you're not aggressive, but you do have strong opinions. you like gardening. you have a deep need for comfort and security. you like things to make sense. you're afraid of circumstances out of control, but letting go helps you live so much more vividly than you could ever imagine.

Muschel: full of golden light

the smell of soup cooking in the other room. golden hour sunlight peeking in through the windows. laughter that bounces against the walls and smiles you can't help but mirror. you're easy to approach. your best feature is probably your smile. you don't mind looking silly if it makes people laugh. you're not easily embarrassed. you're calm and you make people feel at ease. you're a good listener because you really really care what they have to say. people leave every interaction with you feeling just a little bit more loved. you're a kind soul, and people can see that. you mean so much more to people than you know.

Wouldn't say the results are particularly accurate, but we don't suppose the creator thought murderous clowns would be taking their quiz. Maybe if our boys weren't so fucked up in the head...

the quiz: here

tagged by: @roofgeese

tagging: @spacestephh

[marschel]

The NSFW Alphabet! Obviously, very 18+. Also has mentions of murder.

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex) Super cuddly and sweet, help each other and their partners to clean up. Muschel is more active, springing into action, and Calamaro is lazier. Their aftercare consists of drinking some water, cleaning up the makeup and bodily fluids, cozying up for Calamaro. Muschel is usually the first to go to the shower.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) Calamaro likes Muschel’s ass the most. It’s so-o-o good at fucking. He thinks his body’s best part is the backside. It’s pretty muscular and very sensitive. Enjoys massages, which Muschel is gladly giving him.

Muschel sincerely likes dicks. Maybe not his own dick, but everybody else’s. His favorite part of his own are the buttcheeks.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person) Calamaro likes marking his lovers with his cum. He can eat cum if asked, but he's not a big fan. He cums messily, has a lot of cum, it’s thick and salty. Muschel loves cumplay. Eating it, sharing it, having it all over him or his lovers. Super freaky about this stuff. He himself doesn’t ejaculate much, it’s moderately runny and has no special qualities.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) Don’t have secrets from each other. Calamaro secretly likes being submissive, but it takes a special person for that. Mushel likes to give mouth-to-ass, but not to everybody.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?) They are pretty experienced by now, but they weren’t at the beginning. Had a lot of experience with each other before they started to have sex with other people as well. Muschel straight up never had sex before Maro.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual) Like spitroasting other people. With each other, they prefer doggy.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc) Can both crack a joke or two, but are otherwise serious in a flirty way (not in an undying love way, usually).

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.) Calamaro is super well-groomed, shaves his pubic hair completely. Muschel settles for super short trimming and washes a lot.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) Very caring and touchy and calling each other petnames. Can go rough as well though, if they have some days off. Use derogatory language sometimes, but are very careful not to actually insult each other or their partners.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Mostly for mutual masturbation, not solo. It’s a tiring day thing. Muschel almost always wants to give oral though.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Murder talk is the greatest and weirdest. They like to imagine murdering people in the process or even murdering their partner. Not each other though. Also, some slightly BDSM things. Maro sometimes uses his stand for surprise effect, in a dark room.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do) They are mostly safe, doing it in their bedroom. Definitely nowhere in the HQ but the bedroom (they are scared of Risotto). Sometimes like to do it in semi-public places, but are very careful.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) Murder. Dirty talk. Combination of the two.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) Despite being murderous kinky motherfuckers, they wouldn’t do necrophilia. Also, no bodily fluids other than cum. And nothing too dangerous, they wouldn’t want to harm their partners.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) Maro loves both giving and receiving equally. Pretty good at giving, but not as good as Muschel. Schel loves giving oral and he’s fucking great at it. Man knows how to suck dick, expertly so.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.) Usually slower and more sensual, but they can be rough (if they don’t have stuff to do tomorrow).

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.) They’re okay with them if they have no time to have sex. Usually involve oral.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.) Definitely the risky type. Too much fun for them to say no to almost anything. Once slept with a dominatrix.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…) Two to three rounds. They aren’t into fucking all night, they’ve got shit to do. Maro has more stamina, Schel is pretty quick.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?) Nothing except for a bullet vibrator - a gift from Melone.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) Maro is a tease, but he is fair. Schel can tease a little, but is mostly direct.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) Not too loud, mostly just talking. Neither cries.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice) Calamaro prefers fucking ass rather than mouth. When they do have a day off afterwards, he loves to take Schel’s ass. Schel likes taking sloppy seconds, especially Maro’s. Loves to fuck somebody else’s cum into a well-fucked hole.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words) Maro has a medium length, but is girthy and veiny. Muschel’s very average and very clean.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?) Quite horny. Want to fuck at every opportunity. But they can control themselves.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) Maro feels super sleepy after sex and usually takes a nap after cleaning up a little. Schel, on the contrary, gets energetic and usually cleans everything up.

[marschel]

💥 COLLISON

What emotions do they have trouble dealing with?

Calamaro can't express love too well. He loves Schel to the moon and back, but he just can't verbalize it. Muschel has troubles with anything tender and vulnerable. He just isn't used to it. The closest he gets to expressing that to Maro is hinting at his feelings.

😭 CRYING

What makes them cry? do they cry easily?

It’s very hard to make Calamaro cry. He’s only ready to cry alone or with Schel; he would only cry if something happened to his loved ones. Muschel doesn't cry easily, if at all. Only cries out of fear.

👊 PUNCH

Are they quick to violence?

Calamaro has no problems killing people, but is too lazy to kill anybody who wrongs him.

Muschel likes being violent, but is very docile when he needs to be. He holds grudges though.

Ask game

[marschel]

So basically here's the plot: Calamaro and Muschel fuck every La Squadra member.

Melone gets the nicest, gentlest, most adoring treatment of his life. They feel and show great appreciation for him. Closer to a relationship than a friends-with-benefits situation, actually.

Formaggio is a very good friend. Like they may fuck from time to time, but most of all, they just want him to come out of the toxic masculinity shell. With his full cooperation.

Illuso is another one they like a bit more than as a friend. He's Muschel's special boy, they have such a love/hate relationship with a strong emphasis on love. Illuso is a brat they like to tame but they make sure to give good aftercare, both physically and psychologically, showing him they actually love his handsome and mean little ass.

Ghiaccio is only there because of Melone. He needs to know they treat him right, he needs to know they can be trusted, he needs to know they are good at what they're doing. They do foursomes sometimes. Or invite each other to watch. That's just their idea of a double date lol

Pesci, sweet Pesci... Poor thing, they have their eyes on you. They like to play incubi, but they wouldn't ever try to force him to do something uncomfortable. They care a lot about uplifting his self-esteem too, showing the man what praise kink feels like.

Prosciutto is a tough cookie. On one hand, he really loves everybody on the team and cares for them the more than anybody else. One the other hand, he tries to remain as cold as possible. They don't fuck much unless they feel like he needs to unwind a little harder than his usual booty call can provide. He is the tough love guy so no gentleness, but he makes extra sure he doesn't hurt them.

Risotto really needs to fuck more. And he doesn't want to do anything too freaky with Prosciutto, it's just not the kind of relationship they prefer to have. Jerking each other off and occasional head is one thing, having wild threesomes right in the office is another. They're there to help, but also he knows that's the easiest way to remind them they're cared for, especially to Schel who is kinda afraid of him.

[marschel]

When they feel particularly romantic or melancholic, Maro and Schel find a secluded place and waltz together. It makes them feel safer and closer somehow.