#its undersalted is what it is

[octarineblues]

not the only bakery near me being open 10am-3pm like who are you open for??? like sure i miss bread but can i miss work

[whumpitisthen]

Whumpee caretaking Caretaker all the time because they feel useless if they aren't on their knees scraping at the floor or cooking the best possible meals in gratitude

Whumpee does not get to eat what they have made, Whumper will decide if they get to

Whumper eats first, and Whumpee gets the leftovers once they are done

Whumpee is basically a glorified servant, you could pavlov them with a bell or something

Whumper cuddles them when they feel like it, and when they're done with that they just push Whumpee off the couch without a word and order them to bring them a drink

Never a please or thank you for all Whumpee does (unless its for creepy/intimate whumper or manipulation reasons)

Whumpee tied to the kitchen tiles by an ankle chain/collar

When Whumpee isn't needed they are told to get lost and they better not be in the way whatsoever or there will be consequences

Maybe they have their own little room to hide in, like one of those servant rooms that are just large enough to sleep in hidden in the back corners of a massive mansion

Or maybe they get put into a box, locked in a closet or shoved down the basement stairs. Whumper wants to be alone right now, they do not need their clumsy captive to be stumbling around making noise and annoying them

Whumpee is expected to serve everyone and run back and forth between the table and the kitchen all evening, not even allowed to take a seat and catch their breath, too busy serving guests and pleasing Whumper

There is always something to do! Something to dust off, something to cook, something to fix, something to prepare

Whumper does not care at all about the mess they make because they know Whumpee will wordlessly clean up after them

A loving Whumper putting their arms around Whumpee as they cook, do the dishes or sweep the floor (a personal favourite of mine) do they encourage Whumpee or threaten them? Are they causing problems on purpose? Yes, but Whumpee is in no position to fight back, lest their hand gets forced into the boiling pot of water on the stove in front of them by a doting Whumper

Whumpee has to wake up at ungodly hours to have everything ready for Whumper

Whumpee might not even be in any kind of a relationship with Whumper, they're just some poor little guy Whumper decided to put on everlasting kitchen duty

Whumpee is an actual cook who knows what they're doing, slowly losing their mind and confidence in their abilities with Whumper's insane attention to detail and unreachable expectations, constantly scolding and punishing Whumpee for the meat being slightly too dry, or the rice being just a tad undersalted

Whumpee is never good enough, because even when they are, they are told that perfection is the minimum that is required from them

Whumpee blows up at Whumper, having had more than enough, and is quickly threatened or hurt into silence once again, returning to their duties sniffling and miserable. All they asked for was the bare minimum, and they aren't even getting that

Maid outfit

once again thinking about domestic whump. whumpee should stay in the kitchen i think

[dangerouscommiesubversive]

push shove, a little bruised and battered

Fandom: Kamen Rider Kabuto Characters: Yaguruma Sou, Kageyama Shun Song: "In Hell I'll Be In Good Company," The Dead South (playlist here)

They don’t treat each other gently.

Or rather, Sou thinks, I’m not gentle. He’s not sure that Shun is capable of gentleness either, but from him it seems different—a loss, rather than a choice. Maybe he never had that capacity in the first place, maybe it was lost at birth, but it still feels like something’s broken inside him.

It won’t be fixed. Sou doesn’t fix things anymore. It’s better to be content with brokenness.

They’re at a noodle shop, and Shun is staring into his bowl and not eating. He doesn’t look distressed, just…abstracted, fish cake held in his chopsticks as he contemplates its spiral. Sou lets this continue for a few minutes before saying, “Partner, you need to eat.”

Shun blinks slowly and says, “Oh, right,” and lifts the fish cake to his mouth.

While Shun’s chewing, Sou can pay attention to his own meal, cataloguing his critiques of the broth in the part of his mind that still cares about food as he eats egg and mushrooms and pork. Undersalted, could have simmered longer, their miso isn’t top quality—

He looks up, and Shun has stopped eating again, noodles halfway to his mouth, and is back to staring into the bowl.

Sou watches him for a long moment and then leans across the table, taps his cheek with one finger to get him to look up, and says, gently, “Partner. Eat.”

“Right, right.” Shun blinks and then smiles at him, the bright smile with the void behind it. “Sorry, bro. I’ll eat.”

“Can’t get anything done if you don’t eat.”

He doesn’t need to be reminded again, which is good. That’s something.

Later, they’re sitting on a park bench, and Sou stares up into the night. He’s looking for something, but he’s not sure what. Shun is leaning against him, head on his shoulder, warm and present in a way that wasn’t true in the noodle shop and saying in the dreamy, abstracted way that he says most things nowadays, “Maybe another meteor’s going to come down and take out the rest of the city.”

“Maybe. Maybe not.” The moon is not quite full, like an eye half-lidded looking down at him. “Does it matter?”

“No, not really.”

It matters, Sou realizes as Shun is saying it. It matters.

He turns a bit to look down at Shun, who looks up at him in return, probably because his shoulder’s no longer providing a convenient resting spot. And he grabs Shun’s chin, ungently, and kisses him.

Shun kisses him back, but there’s nothing behind it. Not distaste or discomfort or even surprise, just an absent acceptance.

He pulls back. Shun says, “Bro?” and at least sounds puzzled, which is something.

“Never mind,” Sou says, shifting to look up at the sky again. “Don’t make me remind you to eat so much.”

“All right, bro.” Shun settles against his shoulder once more, as if nothing just happened at all. “The moon looks nice tonight, doesn’t it?”

[doodlebeeberry]

More oc writing while I wait for laundry! This is also just funky concept play lol

He watched them quietly for a time. They’d go through an odd cycle of drumming their fingers on the table, picking up their sandwich, considering, and dropping it back onto the plate without taking a bite. They must’ve gone through the motions five times before he finally rolled his eyes and, nabbing one of the chips off his plate,

“She’s not gonna die you know.”

Mp3 turned to look at him as he bit into it. Tin did his best not to look back.

“What?”

“You heard me” He swallowed.

“She got hurt, that’s all. She’s not going anywhere.”

“You’re awfully sure of that”

“Course I am.”

“How?”

“Just am.” He munched in another chip. An odd sort of silence stretched across the table, palpable. The clatter of the diner and its patrons seemed to exist outside of it, like they were living in a bubble. Swinging his leg a bit, he almost revealed in the tap of metal against wood. Mp3 frowned, and got about two steps into the cycle again before breaking it.

“I just don’t get it,” they began. He held back a groan as best he could. They’d been saying the same thing all day.

“She would’ve said something if she’d gotten into trouble, right? She would’ve written. She should’ve called. She always does.”

“Maybe she didn’t want to”

“Why wouldn’t she though”—they gestured wide, and in the process a tomato slice fell free from their sandwich and plapped onto the table—“she doesn’t just hide things like this, it’s not in her nature! She once had half the town mobbing after her after losing their mail and she still told me. Dragged me into it, even!”

“So?”

“So if something was wrong she should’ve told us—told me!”

“But she didn’t”

They drew their lips thin.

“She doesn’t have to tell you everything you know. Could you pass the salt?”

They grabbed it, for what it was worth, but instead sent him a narrowed look.

“How is this not bothering you?”

The little mint looked up at them, almost curious.

“You’re just...quiet. And still. Like it’s just Tuesday.”

“It is Tuesday.”

“That’s not the point and you know it.”

Their tone was sharp, strained. He almost felt bad about that one. They let their food fall back onto the plate and leaned in towards him.

“She’s your friend, Tin. Doesn’t it bug you at all that she got into...whatever mess she got into and didn’t want to tell us?”

They watched each other. The bubble popped; in his ears flooded laughter and cutlery clatter, afternoon sunlight poured in from the window at his side. It glinted against Mp3’s screen, casting a fine sheen, deepening the wideness of their eyes.

“Of course it does” He answered. The least he could do was be honest. “Why wouldn’t it?”

They blinked at him once, he could all but hear their processor whirr. They sat back, breaking off the staring contest. Without a word they slid the salt across the table. He took it between his teeth, biting down just enough to press the little button along the side. A few paltry crystals scattered out from the bottom and onto his food before it ran dry. Figures it was nearly empty.

“Sorry.”

He set the contraption aside. Great Sweetners how he hated those things.

“It’s fine.”

He considered his food, undersalted even still. He hadn’t even been hungry to begin with. He heard Mp3 bite into their food more so than saw it.

“It’s a good thing, you know. That you two get to be that close.”

Chancing a glance up, he caught their soft smile.

“You’re in on this too, you know. You and Cy,” They shrugged with their right shoulder, adding as though uncertain, “if you want to be, that is.”

“I think I’ll take you up on that.”

“Oh, well that’s good! I think the rest of our family already adopted you anyway.”

He flinched back a bit at the notion.

“I’ve only met most of them once though?”

“I know! I had to wait at least two days to get to that point. No fair that it only took you one.”

“I guess I must’ve had an unfair advantage.”

“Yeah,” they bit into their food again, “guess we both did.”

It was warm, but thankfully not yet humid. There didn’t seem to be any rain incoming any time soon. Walking back from the diner, two spare meals tucked into a plastic bag, he took a moment to savor the calm of it all. A lone red squirrel crossed their path. The two of them stopped to watch it scurry by.

“You know,” Mp3 began, “I know you said to stop worrying and all that, but I still really do wanna know. What in Saccharine's name could be bad enough to make her stop writing entirely?”

It darted up a nearby tree, vanishing between rich green leaves.

“No clue” They started walking again. He thought of burnt, blistered fingers, deeply tired eyes, the lingering scent of smoke and sweat, and resisted the cold, unsettled trill that crept up his back at the reminder of the early morning.

“To be honest, I’m not entirely sure I’d like knowing.”

[polin-ah]

abc tag 

thank you @sabsabstudies for tagging me!

A age: sixteen

B birthplace: russia, 90km away from moscow

C current time: 10.31 am

D drink you last had: green tea

E easiest person to talk to: my sister

F favourite song: currently its ‘ 누군가 필요해 ‘ by day6

G grossest memory: having a food poisoning with all the great things that come with it

H horror yes horror no: nope nope 

I in love: with my cat!!

J jealous: of people living near water

K kiss or be kissed: be kissed ‘cause i’m afraid of being annoying

L love at first sight or should i walk by again: falling in love while getting to know the person better

M middle name: a non-existent concept in russia, but if it was i think it would be nina (after my grandma)

N number of siblings: one older sister

O one wish: for my family to always be healthy

P last person you called: my sister (she didn’t even pick up)

Q question you are always asked: “what do you want us to buy for you?”  from my parents 

R reason to smile: bts

S song you last sang: “you should see me in a crown” by billie eilish

T time you woke up: 6 am (to open the door for my cat)

U underwhelming experience: drinking alcohol  

V vacation destination: i would love to go to italy

W worst habit: overeating  and biting my nails

X x-rays: i’ve broken both of my wrists, i had a problem with my knees at some point of my life and also my face (my doctor thought i had sinusitis)

Y your favourite food: undersalted pickles (does it make sense) (for people who know russian - малосольные огурцы!!)

Z zodiac sign: aquarius 

tagging: @studywithcyril @watchmestudyandstuff @patriotstudies @irvistudies <3

[phillybaguettes]

Let’s break bread. Give us this day our daily bread. The band Bread. 

Yes, nothing brings people together like some good old fashioned bread, and at the top of the list of all-time great breads sits the mighty baguette. While Philadelphia is known for its classic Italian breads and hoagies, it’s never had much of a reputation as a baguette town. But as this one-post blog hopes to show you, we’re a city on the rise, like a baguette gloriously puffing up in the oven. And while it may not be obvious, there is no shortage of bakeries in this town churning out beautiful batons that would make even the gruffest Frenchman say “oui oui” with delight.

So one hot and humid summer afternoon, fellow baguette head Brian Chu and I set out to tour Philly’s quietly thriving baguette scene. First on our list was Artisan Boulangerie, a South Philly staple owned and operated by Cambodian immigrants André Chin and Amanda Eap. Chin honed his baking skills in Paris before moving to Philadelphia to open his own French bakery about twenty years ago. This is a no-frills joint that makes tasty pastries and breads each morning, then stays open til they sell ‘em out. They’ve been crushing it in a hip part of South Philly since long before the third-wave coffee shops and yoga studios joined the fray. Even though it was our first stop of the day, they were already pretty much out of everything, including baguettes! (get here early folks) But luckily, the charming Ms. Eap convinced us that a “banette” is essentially the same thing, but in her opinion, even tastier. We couldn’t say no to that, and quickly got to work on what turned out to be essentially a baguette with a big old paunch in the middle, gradually tapering to pointy ends.

Aesthetically, this bread is an absolute beauty, with precise flour-dusted ribbons wrapping around its soft bubbly bulge. While it was quite tasty, it was more reminiscent of a French bread than a baguette, lacking the crispy edges and airy middle that I crave. It’s doughy and chewy in the interior, and while I could see it being a great vehicle for a sandwich, it did not quite cut it on its own. 

From there, we ventured a few blocks east to the Bok building, the eight-story monolithic former public high school that has recently reopened as a hip space for small businesses and organizations, housing everything from a pre-school to a rooftop bar. We had our sights set on Machine Shop, a wholesale bakery that’s been operating out of Bok for a few years. While we knew they don’t sell directly to the public, we figured it was worth a shot to see if we could pop our heads in and check out the operation, and maybe ask them where to find a nearby retailer that carries their bread. As luck would have it, Bok’s security is fairly lax, and we signed right in and walked up to the fourth floor bakery to find co-owners Katie Lynch and Emily Riddell sweeping up the joint and getting ready to end their day by delivering bread to local restaurants. We sheepishly explained our baguette tour concept, and Katie was kind enough to not only give us a free baguette, but to tell us about the operation and show us around the small and charming space.

Whoa Nelly, was this a good baguette. Rustic in appearance, with a deep brown hue, and an organically irregular shape with nice crispy ridges and ends, you could almost see and hear how good this baguette was before even tasting it. Breaking the crispy and crunchy exterior revealed an impossibly airy middle, with big pockets resembling the moon’s craters. Each bite had the perfect combination of a satisfying crunch followed by a nice chew, and with the addition of salt and butter it was a baguette lover’s dream come true. This baguette utilizes sourdough instead of yeast, along with just a touch of whole grain added to the white flour, all of which, while not quite traditional, gives it a depth of flavor rarely found in baguettes. Moral of the story - get this baguette.

It would be tough to top, but from Machine Shop we hopped on our bikes and headed north to Old City to see what High Street on Market had to offer. The more casual sister restaurant to the ultra high-end Fork, High Street is a full service operation for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, but also has a sort-of secret side biz as a bakery. While I’d only had their bread with meals, it is damn good, and I wanted to see if it might be worth swinging by next time I’m in need of a nice baguette to go. They have a number of loaves for sale, including a picturesque spelt baguette.

This was certainly the most Instagrammable baguette of our tour, a bit stouter than most, with deep dark ridges flanked by sensual white-dusted ribbons. Despite its beautiful appearance, the crust didn’t crunch and crackle as I had hoped, resulting in a baguette that was a bit too tough to break apart. The inside, however, was delightful all around, hitting the right balance of chewy and airy. It was a bit bland on its own, with a mild fermented taste that was not quite as pronounced as Machine Shop, but was hitting all the right textural notes. It was a great vehicle for toppings, and was absolutely beloved by French bulldog Xavi.

We were a bit full, a bit parched, but there was plenty more baguette bounty to get to, so we soldiered on to Northern Liberties to hit up the hip bakery and coffee shop Kettle Black. Though the owners/bakers were not present at the time, the friendly barista was happy to tell us that this joint opened because the French owners had been living in Philly for a while and just couldn’t get a baguette that lived up to their lofty expectations.

Well, those must have been some damn lofty expectations, because this baguette was an all around banger. Starting with a rustic appearance with deep dark hues from the ridges and ends, intermingling with the golden brown of the crust, this thing was a beauty with zero fussiness. Similar to the Machine Shop baguette, this baguette had the perfect combination of crunchy exterior and soft chewy interior, with the elastic and springy dough meshing about the porous craters. They use an all-natural fermentation process, but the sourdough taste was a bit subtler than our previous two baguettes. Definitely a baguette worth going out of your way for, and I’ll be back soon to check out their bagels and other goodies.

Next stop - another French spot with a significantly different aesthetic, the brightly lit, white-walled Center City bakery J’aime. This place has a very modern French vibe, with a pastry case full of dainty pastries and miniature quiches. While the focus here seems to be on the cutesy sweets, they do offer two baguettes, a “French” (which looked more like a French bread loaf than a baguette) and a sourdough. We opted for the sourdough, which despite its oddly round ends had a nice appearance, with precise and thin ribbons giving it a satisfyingly geometric vibe.

Unfortunately, just holding this baguette I could tell we were dealing with our densest bread of the day. Just as the sky was hinting at some heavy rain, it seemed the forecast was also calling for a heavy baguette - an arguably worse omen. The interior was lacking the large cavernous holes that we all know and love, with little tiny air pockets in their place. This was a doughy, chewy, and soft baguette, and on top of that it was undersalted and dry. While this place seems to be doing great work with the pastries, they are sadly lacking in the baguette game.

When we left J’aime, the wind was howling and it seemed that heavy rain was imminent, so we biked as fast as we could to seek some shelter, non-baguette food, and beer at Parc. Oh, we would also be getting a baguette there. Duh. Parc is a Disneyfied French bistro, one of the OG’s of the Stephen Starr empire. While the annoyingly high prices ($15 Frosé), the annoyingly bougie crowd (a healthy mix of tourists, Jersey-ites, and old people who live in Center City), and the annoyingly on-the-nose faux Frenchiness (pretty sure it says joie de vivre AND je ne sais quoi on the menu) make you wanna hate this place, they actually make some damn good French comfort food. In fact, my love of their baguette is what inspired this tour in the first place.

I’ve been hitting this restaurant up for all my baguette needs for years, because they’re baking them all day long, so it’s the ideal way to get a fresh-out-of-the-oven baguette at just about any time. While there’s nothing flashy about the Parc baguette, it’s so consistent and inoffensive that it’s the perfect vehicle for a pre-meal meat and cheese board. It’s never gonna steal the show, but this is a baguette you can set your watch to. Solidly middle of the road in almost all of the factors that we’ve been analyzing (crunch, chew, airiness, flavor, appearance), it’s hard to praise this baguette too much, but it’s also hard to find fault with it. For $3 and always fresh, there’s no reason I won’t be fighting through the crowd of befuddled old folks and out-of-towners to snag one of these the next time I need an impromptu baguette.

After a nice salade lyonnaise and beer at Parc, the storm had subsided and we ventured across Rittenhouse Square to Metropolitan Bakery, a Center City institution that’s been running the French baked goods game since the early 90′s. 

Right off the bat, Metropolitan set itself apart from the pack by offering a third of a baguette for a cool $1.35, definitely an appealing option for those that are craving just a taste of baguette. Sadly, despite this customer-friendly option, and their dope old-school French signage, the baguette itself was a disappointment. Similar texture and bubbly exterior to Artisan Boulangerie, it was very lacking in crunch. The soft crust gave way to an gummy interior that was laboriously chewy, and while the taste was solid, the unfortunate texture left much to be desired.

In Summary

Artisan Boulangerie (South Philly): Aesthetically pleasing soft and chewy blank slate ($3)

Machine Shop (South Philly): Boldly flavorful sourdough baguette with earthiness from a touch of added whole grain, a textural superstar with a most satisfying crunch and perfectly airy middle (Wholesale only, but available at various coffee shops and restaurants, as well as on site Friday mornings)

High Street on Market (Old City): Instagram-ready spelt baguette with a slightly fermented taste ($3)

Kettle Black (Northern Liberties): Delicious rustic baguette with deep dark crispy crust and springy air-filled interior ($3.50)

J’aime (Gayborhood): Neat and tidy appearance, but a bland and doughy interior ($3.78)

Parc (Rittenhouse): A baguette you can set your watch to. Hot and fresh any time of day and a simple crowd pleaser ($3)

Metropolitan (Rittenhouse): Unique value and a mild but pleasant taste, but an overly chewy texture and no crunch ($1.35 for a third)

[hempowerment]

Lamb Mandi

Today it seemed appropriate to choose a #NoMuslimBan recipe from Yemen.

Yemeni food is excitingly flavoured and spiced, influenced by its history as part of the ancient incense and spice trade routes. Mandi is a kabsa-esque rice-and-meat dish and originates from Hadhramaut, but is popular throughout the Gulf region. It’s traditionally slow-cooked in a hole in the ground, in a clay pot weighted with coal. The meat remains moist, hence the name, which derives from ‘nada’, the Arabic word for dew. This isn’t a realistic method for most of us. I’ve cooked it as a one-pot stovetop meal instead that takes about an hour to prep and cook. The meat is moist but without the smokey flavour from the coal. It’s not a quick weeknight meal but it’s pretty hands off and doesn’t take as long as Sunday gravy either. I’d say it’s beginner level and is a good option if you want to make a fairly impressive rice and meat meal that isn’t as complicated as a Hyderabadi biryani (which is on my list of future things to cook).

I googled hard for an easier recipe that doesn’t involve marinating (which would require planning ahead) and is strictly one pot (which would require washing up). Some have pretty involved set-ups or require coal (not today). In the end I settled on a mixture of two recipes: chicken mandi from Aysha’s Kitchenette for the spice mix inspiration and kebsa from My Halal Kitchen for the one-pot method and proportions.

At this point I’d read a lot of mandi recipes on the internet. The spices I picked are mostly from the kebsa recipe with the exclusion of fennel (which I hadn’t seen in any mandi recipes), and the inclusion of cloves and cardamom, which are present in all of them, and twice: for the meat and again for the rice. Amy’s comment on the kebsa recipe suggests no loomi (dried or ‘black’ lime) for Yemeni mandi, but I saw quite a few (eg. this and this) that include it, and as it’s available to me I added it anyway. Once I read somewhere, possibly on the internet, possibly in The Food of Oman (the reason black lime exists in my kitchen), that I should prick the limes before putting them in and squish them after cooking to exude a bit of their insides, so I did that too. I removed the limes so we wouldn’t accidentally eat them.

Some fancy things I did was use lamb koftas and saffron rosewater. The koftas, because I thought it would be nice to have two different types of lamb, like when you go to a Turkish restaurant and you get a platter of different types of grilled meats, mostly lamb, but in different forms. I saw recipes with and without saffron. To make it super extra special, I dissolved a pinch of saffron in a quarter cup of rosewater. I cut my finger opening the bottle, the cap has sharp edges (I use the Al Rabih brand, it’s affordable but be careful opening your bottle). I also used turmeric, which I saw in many recipes but not all, for the colour because saffron is expensive. I can’t say that the rosewater added extra flavour on top of the spices and everything else, but I knew it was there.

The mandi was very good even though I undersalted it. You might like to use lamb or chicken stock instead of water. The next time I make mandi I might clean off my oven wire rack insert thing and try making a chicken one in the oven.

Some Yemeni-food related blogs to check out: Yemeniyah Sheba Yemeni Food and her instagram My Halal Kitchen which has food from everywhere (and she has a book out)

Also: Woman from Yemen

ingredients

1 tsp ground cumin

1 tsp chilli flakes

1 tsp ground ginger

0.5 tsp ground coriander

0.5 tsp turmeric

0.5 tsp cardamom

0.5 tsp allspice

0.5 tsp cinnamon

5 cloves

4 whole cardamom pods

2 dried limes

6 black peppercorns

about 450g lamb (I used 250g diced lamb shoulder and about 200g lamb koftas cut and rolled into balls)

1.5 cups rice

2 cups water

pinch of saffron dissolved in 1/4 cup rosewater

1 diced onion

10 quartered cherry tomatoes

1 diced red pepper

salt

black pepper

oil

method

Heat some oil (I used a mix of olive and canola) in a heavy pot with a lid, like a Dutch Oven.

Add in all the spices except the cardamom pods, peppercorns and limes. Add the lamb. Salt and pepper. Mix gently.

Brown the lamb on all sides, then put the lid on and turn the heat down to low. Cook gently for about 30 minutes.

After 30 minutes lift the lid. The lamb will have exuded what I'm going to call lamb liquid, but is probably lamb fat. Nothing lamb is low-calorie. Add in the onion, cherry tomatoes and red pepper. Turn the heat up and cook until the vegetables are soft.

Add the saffron rosewater (or use regular water) and 2 cups water. Poke holes in the dried limes with a sharp knife so their flavour seeps out while cooking. Put in the limes, peppercorns and cardamom pods. Bring to a boil.

Add in the rice, put the lid on and turn the heat down low. Cook for 20 minutes.

When the 20 minutes is done, take your pot off the heat. Take the lid off and fluff the rice. Let stand for about 5 minutes.