#its five in the monring i dnot have to coherent if i dont wanna!!

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Behold. The clip of Stranded in Space gave me Pallura feelings. Now I cough them up in fanfic form

It’s an angsty mess. ah well

-

Allura heard it too late. 

The clipped panic in Pidge voice and the word the Green Paladin didn’t quite have enough time to say.

She barely heard it at all over the roar rattling through her bones, the thunder her own racing pulse, the shockwaves threatening to pry her fingers from their already tenuous grip on the Yellow Lion.

But she did catch it. The warning that made her gut clench and her blood turn to ice in her veins.

“I’m losing my gr-”

In the time it took for Allura to look up there was a yell. And Pidge…

Was gone.

Taking Allura’s breath and ability to think along with her.

-

She had been right there. Right next to her. Right there within easy reach.

Why hadn’t she reached out?

It’s a question for herself-

Her, once again too slow to stop everything from spiraling out of control. Too slow and left to watch her world slip away in an instant, a witness who could have done something if she had only…

Why hadn’t she reached out?

It was also a question for Pidge.

Why didn’t you use me to stop your fall- But oh, Allura already knows the answer to that.

Quick and clever Pidge, fiercely protective Pidge, had done a simple calculation in those split seconds before Allura could even react. She’d weighed risk against certainty and come to the most reasonable conclusion.

One Paladin lost in space was better than two.

So she’d let herself fall past Allura with nothing more than a strangled yell and vanished into the endless starry blackness.

Why hadn’t Pidge reached out…

Because she was Pidge, the Green Paladin, the girl who had gone beyond the bounds of her known world for the sake of the people she loved. And had done it again just a second ago.

Why hadn’t Allura reached out..?

Because she was not Pidge.

And she seemed to doom the people she loved simply by daring to love them.

-

Allura was sure, in the following few breathless moments, that her suit had ruptured somewhere and failed to seal itself.

She must be losing air no matter what the readouts said- Each breath she took was sharp and deep but it just wasn’t enough to fill her lungs and take away the feeling of suffocating.

Pidge, she thought dazedly as she craned her head around, trying to find some glimpse of green.

Pidge is slipping- There was no green.

I cannot let her go- She’d lost her chance.

I have to get her…

… She couldn’t even tell which way Pidge had gone.

-

There had been many occasions when Allura had been grateful for the blessing that was Hunk.

She’d never been more grateful than when he also lost his hold on the Lion and slammed back into the rest of them, knocking the rest of them into the void.

-

This time.

The yells were coming from all of them now but Pidge’s voice still rang the sharpest through Allura’s coms.

“Ha- Haa- Haaa-”

Pidge was panting. Hyperventilating.

“-I’m losing sight of the Lions!”  

And still trying to get a handle on the mess unfolding around them.

Something about that was calming. The other girl’s fear expanded in Allura’s chest, leaving no room for her own, and the realization that she herself wasn’t even trying to spot the Lions as she searched desperately for some flash of green armor, it was all almost enough to make Allura laugh.

“Stay together!” She dimly heard Keith say, his voice muted even as it blasted right into her ears. “Oh no, oh-” Poor Hunk didn’t sound as if he had any idea how follow that advice.

She tuned them both out.

Calm, Allura ordered herself as the universe tried to throw her in ten different directions at once. You are falling together now, not necessarily losing her. Stay calm and you may just be able to find her.

Lance’s voice broke through her focus. “I’ve got Hunk!”

Allura was too relieved to feel frustrated and too scared to linger on the relief.

Pidge might be nearby. Or she might be tumbling further and further away with every tick, she might already be out of reach, no. Focus.

She might be-

-There!

Allura’s body registered the green flash even before her eyes could. She turned, flipped, stretched out her hand as far as she could…

Not far enough what if I miss this is my second chance this might be my last chance-

By some strange stroke of luck her eyes found amber ones.  

The familiar color was washed out by the blue tint of Pidge’s helmet visor, but as Allura watched the shock was pushed aside and a familiar determined light blazed up in its place, brighter than she’d ever seen it before.

For one split tick they stared at each other.

If this is the last time I ever see her-

-

Once upon a time Allura had watched from planet-side as the Castle Ship prepared to lift off from the surface of Arus, Galra at its helm and the Lion’s of Voltron trapped inside.

Once upon a time Allura had held a de-aging infant Coran in her arms and watched through a blur of tears as reality prepared to wipe from existence the man who was as good as a second father to her, the only family she had left.

Once upon a time she had not known Pidge Gunderson, Katie Holt of Earth, or learned to trust her in the worst of times.

She knew her now.

She trusted her.

-

Pidge twisted, just barely changing the pitch of her tumble, and reached out.

Not enough on its own, but-

-

It’s going to be okay.

Those burning eyes seemed to tell her.

You can do this.

Allura breathed out and found that, somehow, despite having done nothing more than relax and with no time to form-shift, she could stretch her arms forward that one final inch.

-

Both of Allura’s hands clamped tight around Pidge’s wrist.

“I’ve got Pidge!”

I’ve got you.

There was a wrenching tug, a searing pain of muscle yanking against bone, a yell, an indescribable pull as all of space tried to drag Pidge from her grip-

Allura held on.

This one time with this one person- She would not let the universe have its way.

She would not let it take Pidge too.

-

The pull faded quickly.

The whole thing must have taken only a few seconds and still Allura felt she’d been fighting against inertia for an eternity. Her arms ached, hands shaking beneath her suit’s gloves.

She gripped Pidge even more firmly, trying to still the shakes. 

Pidge might have felt them anyway. Her hand gave a weak answering squeeze- Told you so. She seemed to say. You did it. It’s gonna be okay.  

The shaking didn’t stop but when Allura took a deep breath she found it didn’t threaten to choke her. 

But it wasn’t time to relax yet. A blur of colors was pinwheeling towards them, the other three Paladins linked together in wildly whirling chain.

In order to grab them Allura would have to let go-

Do not let her go.

Allura drew Pidge close and wrapped her right arm securely around the shorter girl. Not until she could feel the hard lines of Pidge’s armor bruising her sides did she dare free her other hand and snag a flailing limb as it passed by, linking them with the others as Pidge did the same.

Yes, Allura decided as jetpacks were fired and things calmed down. Yes it would be okay now.

The thought was cemented by Pidge pulling them even closer together, her fingers hooking into the edges of Allura’s armor, every movement proof of her being here with Allura and proof of her being safe.

And as long as Allura had that she knew she could figure out everything else. 

Pidge was the Green Paladin, to Allura though she was also something else completely.

She was hope. She was a promise.

The hope for a day when Allura would never have to worry about losing someone she loved again, and a promise that it could be made real.

So Allura would hold on until then. And she would never, ever, let go.