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gladiatorcunt · 8 months

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MARLBORO REDS - ANAKIN SKYWALKER

cause good men die too, so i’d rather be with you

summary: mechanic dilf!anakin x gender neutral kindergarten teacher!reader

wc: 8.4k

cw: “soft” dark content, made padme’s death vague on purpose, anakin has the vibes of a married father of 4 hitting on you while you’re waiting on their table at olive garden, daddy kink, anakin imagines killing someone, MALE MASTURBATION (the most graphic fantasies are skull fucking and anakin kinda hoping you’ll tear when he puts it in), bra mention (reader does have a fem style but i’m nb so that’s how i see it and men can also have a fem style), it’s not mentioned but anakin is going through cigarette withdrawals, anakin’s canon typical inability to be in a healthy relationship, possibly predictable plot twist (?), i wanted to be a lot grosser, anakin is 42 and he’s depicted as such, age gap (reader is in their early 20’s), this takes place in the U.S.

requests are open (read the rules first)

block & move on if uncomfortable

do not repost or translate!!

The exhaust fumes transported him for a moment, somewhere tropical with a cigar in one hand and a tit in the other as a wet body slid adjacent to his. His hard-earned vacation went up in flames as a shrill car horn hunted down his eardrums. Anakin snapped out of it and stared through his brittle bangs with dead eyes. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks, how to act like a normal human being one of them.

"Alright, that should be everything. Since we just needed to rotate your tires and do an oil change, we're looking at about 142 dollars."

"Thank you so much, I'll just go pay at the front desk. Have a good one!"

Anakin sighed and gave a half assed wave that she didn't even see. He has nowhere near as much spunk as he did back in the day, but his energy is always shot to hell long before he sees his last customer of the day. Luckily it was just a routine maintenance type of thing, he would've just bashed his head in with a wrench if it was anything more.

Puddles of blood trot after said customer, he’s amazed that they can drive so well considering they have a bullet in their head.

There’s no bullet or rivers of blood in actuality, but a man can dream.

His knee joints creaked as he got out of his squatting position. He groaned from the effort while smearing his fingers in more grease trying to wipe them off on the pants of his overalls. The whole workshop smelled like garbage and he probably smelled even worse. His trusty grease rag was subsequently discarded on top of his portable tool tower. He noticed that a tub of lighter fluid was on its side so he prevented that big mess waiting to happen and screwed the cap shut, picked it up, and set it back on the shelves in the storage room. He had to remember to leave one of his employees a post-it notifying them that they were almost out.

His sleeves were shucked up his soft muscular forearm to check his watch. His eyes nearly popped out of their sockets like moles in a whack-a-mole machine when he saw the time.

SHIT!

It was 4:30, the time he's expected to be at Alderaan Apples Elementary to pick up his twins. He didn't have the time it would normally take him to drive 20 minutes back to his place for a 10 minute shower, and then drive 30 more minutes to be at his kids' school. He normally didn't work that late, since he owns the shop he can choose his own hours. But Anakin lost track of time obsessing over work and now he'd have to embarrass his kids by showing up covered in it. Their teacher would probably be there to chew him out, but in his defense this really didn't happen all that often.

That teacher being arguably the biggest reason why he hated that they’d see him looking how he did right then. They're awfully pretty, with a chest that he's pictured slapping and sucking while their thick ass recoils from bouncing on his uncut cock. They had just moved to their average sized town at the start of the year, they told him at the parent teacher conferences at the beginning of the school year. Something about yearning to get away from their lackluster small town but also being too afraid to venture out into any kind of big city on their own.

They were making the cutest little gestures when they were shyly talking his ear off too, shifting their thighs together as they swayed and never letting their eye contact stray too far away from their freshly polished mary janes. Anakin was very careful about remembering everything he could about Luke and Leia's first real school year. Hell, he was more scared than they were. But there was just something in the way this new teacher did their best to soothe any worries the kids might have.

"It's okay, we'll be going on this new adventure together. And I'll do my very best to be there for you every step of the way. I hope you can be brave and look after me too!"

Luke nodded timidly but with a newfound sense of determination. Leia shouted an affirmative, being more extroverted in comparison to her brother.

Their teacher was young, somewhere in their early 20's. Most likely having flown into town right after getting their degree. It made something in his gut swirl and simmer, imagining their delicate finger tracing his crow's feet and tugging on the gray in his hair. Their head nestled gently in between his squishy pecs, some of his muscle definition was lost with age but he had a feeling you'd like how much the slight softness of his belly highlighted the muscle underneath.

The cliche apples in the blouse their teacher was wearing seemed to have Anakin in a trance as he zoned out. He grunted in acknowledgement when he needed to and slipped every form and newsletter he was given into his satchel. When it was time to head home, Luke and Leia clung to their teacher's legs. Anakin rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly and bent over to pry them off. He explained how sorry he was, being a single dad meant that whether or not he meant to, the kids still looked for a mother figure.

He'll never forget the way your eyes widened by a fraction, flicking up to make eye contact with his feigned nonchalant stare. You seemed.... happy to hear that he was single. But that could've just been an old man getting wrapped up in the delusions that he still has it.

"I'm so sorry to hear that, Mr. Skywalker. I'm sure you don't need me to tell you how hard it is to do what you do everyday, but let me just say that I think you're doing an excellent job."

He thinks you'd do even better.

By the time he had finished reliving that fond little memory, he could spot the street sign for the street the school was on. Ruffling his hair, he made a sharp right turn and slowly pulled into the parking lot. His black chevy truck performed beautifully like always so he gave her a solid pat on the hood. He turned on his heel, immediately seeing his children hugging either one of your legs. He was only 10 minutes late, it wasn't any better but he would never make his kids feel like he abandoned them. He never wanted them to go through what he had gone through when he was their age.

He adjusted his collar and made a last ditch effort to wipe his fingers off on his clothes. He heard a quiet cough. He shot his head up to catch your unamused eyes. A wry smile appeared on his face as he jogged over to you. When he reached the three of you, he immediately crouched and placed a hand on Luke and Leia's shoulders.

"Dad's really sorry, okay? He just lost track of time but he rushed over here as fast as he could as soon as he realized what time it was."

Luke peeked out from behind your leg, "Like the Flash?"

"Yes, Luke, like the Flash." Anakin chuckled, slowly opening his arms wide in the hopes that his kids weren’t too mad at him.

Thankfully he was instantly overwhelmed by two bodies slamming into him, almost knocking him onto the ground and tumbling down the concrete steps. Luke was clutching onto him so tightly and Leia was giggling up a storm. He stood up and gently ushered his kids into holding one of his hands so they could stand beside him.

He cleared his throat a few times before finally addressing you.

"I'm so sorry, I don't know if you overheard but work was really hectic today and I didn't want to waste more time cleaning up. Please just think of me how you did before, I won't look like this tomorrow."

You sighed, shaking your head with a small smile. Your blouse had a floral pattern today, blue covered in peonies and apple blossoms. Your pants were some kind of plaid thing but you make them work so well. Anakin had to actively keep his eyes from eye fucking your wide hips and oggling the expanse of your butt in the tight pants. Just thinking about how little must be left to the imagination made his cock ache in his overalls. But he restrained himself, he was going to ask you out when he was in a much better and.... cleaner state. He pushed the thoughts down and settled himself down with daydreams of the near future.

"It's alright, Mr. Skywalker. I understand your situation, so long as it doesn't happen frequently and the children don't have to wait too long, we won't have a problem." You gently admonished the older man, not hiding the protective tone in your voice but still looking up at him with bashful warmth in your eyes.

Stars, the way you were already so protective over his kids made him even harder. He briefly wondered how you'd be with their younger siblings. The image made his heart flutter and a wide smile stretched his lips. He shuffled from one foot to the other, praying to whatever God is out there that he's able to hide his boner in his baggy overalls. He still had quite a few years before he even wanted to think about having the birds and bees talk with the kids. He adjusted his overalls quickly and reached out a greasy rough palm to you.

"I swear this won't happen everyday, thank you for being so kind. I definitely won't forget it." He murmured with a wink that was open to interpretation.

You bit your lip as you leaned forward to slip your smooth palm into his. A sharp shiver traveled up Anakin's body and butterflies erupted in your stomach at the contact. You clicked your heels together and shook his hand, the weight of it made certain kinds of thoughts pop into your head that you'd rather not deal with at the moment.

Reluctantly Anakin pulled his hand away, making sure it lingered more than was necessary or appropriate. He put his back to you and double checked that Luke and Leia had one hand in each of his and their other hands on the strap of their backpacks. Luke had one with planets on it while Leia had one with dinosaurs. He looked down at their feet to make sure that they were going slow and steady on the steps. They reached the bottom of the steps and walked across the parking lot to Anakin's truck. He opened the back seat, lifting Leia first and waiting for her to settle in before nearly throwing out his back bending down again to help Luke in. He buckled them up and made sure their seatbelts were fastened properly. He took a few steps back and gingerly closed the backseat door on Luke's side. His back was screaming at him on the trip around the back of the truck, it especially burned when he haphazardly threw his door open and climbed up into the driver's seat.

The drive home was the same as it was everyday. Leia excitedly told her father all about every single detail of her day and Luke needing less coaxing to talk about his as the school year progressed. Luke was upset when they ran out of apple juice at lunch because that meant he had to have grape. Leia bragged about the rock she painted during craft time. Anakin listened intently, no matter what kind of depraved shit he felt for their teacher, he wanted to take extra care that both of his kids felt heard and appreciated at the end of the day. He responded with jokes and questions to keep them talking, it distracted them from realizing how long the drive was to the house.

They pulled into the house's garage half an hour later. Anakin was about ready to collapse into a pile of bones in his recliner. Luke and Leia ran like bats out of hell through the door and up the stairs to their bedrooms. He could hear the sounds of them putting their backpacks on their hooks and unzipping them to go through the jungle of papers they stash in them.

The fridge was fresh out of Dr. Pepper so Anakin grumbled and got a can of bud lite from his locked minifridge on the counter. He managed to make it to the couch before he let himself fall face first onto the cushions.

The pitter patter of tiny feet bounding down the stairs yanked him from sleep so he sat up and leaned his cheek against the arm of the couch.

"Dad! Dad! Dad! Look!" Luke blurted out, shoving some kind of paper in his dad's smushed face.

Anakin grimaced but made himself sit upright. He reached out and took the paper from Luke, holding it at a good distance away from his face and at a downwards angle so he could read it properly.

"What's this, buddy?"

"It's a paper for the party, Dad! The Valentine's day one that's um.... this Friday, i think.” Luke nervously wrung his hands in his striped shirt as he spoke. “I want to get something for my teacher too…”

Anakin rubbed his shaved chin as he read the paper. Luke was right. It was a newsletter informing parents about the Valentine's Day party each class would be holding on Friday. There would be no working or classes and instead every class would have an all day party for both the children and their parents. Students were allowed to bring any snacks of choice, but they had to bring a box of valentine cards for their class and give one to every student in their class.

"That must be nice, having no school for a day. Well, i'll be there on Friday and tomorrow we can go to the store and get the supplies for you and your sister."

“And we can get something for my teacher?”

“Of course Luke, that’d be a very nice thing to do for them.”

"Okay! Thanks, dad, love you!" Luke cheered, bouncing on his feet and kissing Anakin on the cheek while giving him a second long side hug before running back upstairs.

The next day the Skywalker family was back in the truck on the way to the biggest local supermarket in the area. It wasn't too far, just in the next town over. They could've gone to the smaller store back home, but the kids liked having options and liked car rides that were like little road trips. (Why they hated the longer drives when they were to school but liked them in situations like this, Anakin could sympathize.

Anakin shut the radio off when they pulled into the large parking lot of the supermarket. He put his car in park and turned the engine off. The wind chill smacked him right in the face as soon as he stepped out of his seat. He rubbed his hands up and down his arms to warm himself up and walked over to get Leia and Luke out of the car as quickly as possible without freezing his ass off. They did the standard routine of holding their dad's hands while they crossed the parking lot. Anakin was telling them to look both ways to watch out for any cars that were coming as they walked along the crosswalks. Mercifully they weren't in the cold long before they entered the store.

The bright white LED overhead lights made Anakin want to pass out but he followed closely behind the kids that were already running themselves ragged all over the place. He reminded them what they were here for and his arms were pulled to their breaking point all the way to the card aisle. There were so many options of valentine card packs. There were Bluey ones, Spiderman, ones that looked like the cootie catchers you fold and pull apart, et cetera.

Luke ended up choosing Spiderman ones that came with pencils. Leia chose a kitten design for her cards.

Anakin almost fell asleep on the ride home. He let the kids pick out drinks from the little displays in front of the registers so they were miles away in sugar rush land. He made a note to pop a couple ibuprofens before he went to bed. Some days are easier than others but since his wife passed away when his kids were newborns, he’s never known what it was like to be able to depend on someone else to always be there to help. His childhood friend Obi-wan stops by every so often to stay over, his mom and step-dad babysit when he stops being stubborn, but that’s once in a blue moon. The sunset casts light onto the sunspots and hair on his arms. He rolled both of his sleeves up because his body typically runs hot and global warming making the temperature 65 degrees in the middle of February does him no favors.

The McDonald’s they drove through got the kids happy meals wrong three times, something that was clearly a sign of the apocalypse.

He had to remind Luke and Leia not to run too fast as they clammored out of the truck with his assistance and bolted to the front door. Anakin sighed his millionth sigh of the day and clamped a hand on Leia’s head to steady her as he searched his rusty old keyring for their house key. His steady hand inserted the key into the lock, ushering his kids inside with his free hand while he pushed the door open. His long legs moved at a sloth like pace, Leia and Luke ignored him and shot up the stairs like two little rockets.

“Guys, slow down. Marshmallow feet, remember?” He reminded them and leaned around the corner so they could hear him, shaking his head in exasperation when all he gets in response is a couple “Okay, dad!”s.

The white and orange ibuprofen bottle stored in one of the many dark wood cabinets over the fridge beckoned him with a come hither motion. He’s little more than a slave to his baser instincts so he dutifully heeded the call. The cabinet creaked when he cracked it open but he couldn’t give less of a fuck as he dove for the pill bottle and shook out a few orange pills. He exhaled in relief in a way that would suggest he was smoking weed when his adams apple bobbed as the pills hit his stomach.

With that mindless task out of the way, Anakin slowly journeyed up the stairs to get Leia and Luke ready for bed. He kept a stern eye on them to ensure they brushed their teeth, used their mouthwash properly, and washed their faces. After the kids completed their bedtime routines, he tucked them into bed while humming a lullaby Obi-Wan had taught them when he held them as infants. He gave them their time to say goodnight to their mom, Luke looked at the glow in the dark stars on his ceiling when he said it and Leia clutched her stegosaurus plushie when she whispered her goodnight.

Anakin didn’t contribute but he warmly kissed his twins on their foreheads and tucked the corners of their comforters around their shoulders.

His heavy work boots thundered against the hardwood floor of the hallway as he walked out of their room and down the carpeted stairs to the den. He unhooked the buttons holding up his overalls on his shoulders and shimmied his ruined overalls down to his ankles. His hairy thighs expanded as he stepped out of them so he could kick them to the other side of the room. He was left in only his boxers and a white tank top that would never be white again. So he flexed his arms as he took that tank top off too. Grease stains were all over his body but he could at least take a shower now.

His boxers joined the towels from yesterday’s shower on the floor as his soft cock flopped out. He gave it an absentminded stroke that injected something molten into his bone marrow. He bent over to reach the faucet and turned the water on. The shower didn't start until the water babbling over his thick calloused fingers was hot enough to cook a lobster in.

He rolled his shoulders back as he stepped into the shower. His mouth dropped open in a silent exclamation and his neck popped as his head lolled back. The onslaught of boiling hot water pin pricked his skin in a pleasure-pain sort of way that made his thoughts temporarily quiet down.

His cock gave a couple twitches but Anakin elected to wait until he had at least washed his hair before he rubbed a much needed orgasm out.

3-in-1 shampoo that smelled like some dior cologne was all up in his hair, his hands unhurriedly glided through his short-ish soapy strands. He angled his head back and let the lather he had worked up be drowned out by the shower head. He grabbed his vanilla & shea butter body wash and let the spout rest against his glistening pecs as his fingers curled around the stocky bottle and squeezed. The smooth liquid spurted out over his pecs and dripped down his body. He reached his hands right up under the steady stream and soaped up his pecs, ghosting his thumbs over his puffy nipples before spreading his hands out and spreading the soapsuds all over the rest of his body.

Squelching sounds echoed off the shower floor as Anakin widened his stance. His right hand was subconsciously traveling closer and closer to his half-hard cock. He had worked so hard, finally being able to relax and luxuriate in the silence made the blood in his body migrate further south.

A certain teacher flashed through his mind, his head whipped down in shock to discern how greatly his flushed cock swelled up faster just at the single image of his kids’ kindergarten teacher.

An aurora borealis of fantasies swirled in the air.

You’re kneeling on a pillow (he would be at serious risk of getting more brow wrinkles if you had to touch the harsh dirty floor with your bare skin.) and bobbing your head up and down the fat cock making a bulge in your cheek. Your sparkling eyes have this glazed over look to them as he anchors his hands on the back of your head. He widens his stance and bullies your throat with his heavy cock. You squeak and sputter but you take it like such a good pet. Your plump lips slide off of his meat a couple inches but before he can do anything, you’re groping his taut ass as you wiggle your head down to the base of his cock. Your eyes flutter shut as your brain shuts off; your nose is buried right in his musky bush. His face scrunches up in the best kind of pain, but he locks his gaze on the way your eyes roll back when he begins to skull fuck you.

Thank god for oral fixations.

“Gonna let Daddy soak this warm throat pussy?” Don’t worry, he knows you can’t exactly use your vocal chords properly at the moment. So he nods your head for you, deepening his thrusts into slow sharp jabs.

He’d baptize you in cum if you let him, your skin would look so pretty and glossy covered in it. He’d help you wipe it off after he cements the image of your eyelashes sticking together in his mind.

Now he’s grabbing your love handles while his cock builds his dream home in your guts. Your ass shakes back against his hips as you try to steady the phone in your hands and face it towards the overhead. He grabs your hair in one fist and gently tugs your head up so you can pay attention properly. He didn’t go through all this just to let you hide away from him. In a perfect world, the kids would be staying with his mom so you’d be more than welcome to lose your voice.

The vision in his mind shifts to you being on your back, hands trembling trying to hold your legs as close to your chest as possible. You’re looking up at him like he was born in the center of the sun. He’s looking back at you like you’re the moon made flesh, eternally encapsulated in his sea of stars. Anakin smiles triumphantly but with a heady passion in his gait that threatens to burn his lungs to ash, coughing them up over your open heart.

“You’re doing so well puppy, that’s my brave baby.” He coos and pries your hands off your thighs finger by finger.

Once your hands are free, his larger ones ardently seek out yours like a dog going after a bone. The rough texture of his digits feels like an uncomfortably pleasant caress as they lace together with your own. He doesn’t look at anything else; can’t think of anything else when you make the cutest little watery gasp as his cock humps along the crack of your hole. The red tip of it gets caught against your outer sweet spot as if trying to give your crotch small pecks. His eye wrinkles crinkle when his smile widens and he offers a breathy laugh.

He squeezes your hands tightly as he wraps a hand around his cock and directs it to its northern star. Your nails digging into his knuckles don’t distract from your hole stretching itself wide to suckle at his encroaching length.

And if in the shower he spilled into his feverishly fucked fists at the concept of crimson liquid mixing with cum to make a pink swirl where your bodies meet, you’d never know. He thumbed at the glans under his cock tip as he came down from his high, skirting a fingernail up a vein on the side and wishing he was mouthing the space between your shoulder blades; preening your white feathers with his scratchy tongue.

The next couple days were gone with a couple of blinks. He never deviated from his routine; wake up, wipe off the drool on his face, get kids ready and take them to school, go to work, clean up, go pick kids up from school, help with whatever work 6 year olds would have, put them to bed, jerk off in the shower till his legs ache, fall asleep on his stomach with his the right side of his face smushed into a pillow.

He did find some time to put together a teacher’s appreciation basket for you. You more than anyone else deserved a few something somethings on a day meant to represent love. The gifts were packed nicely and neatly in a vintage wicker basket wrapped in a red gingham bow and covered in see through red plastic wrap. Your reaction would regrettably have to be viewed from afar, but he’d know how to move forward depending on what adorable expression you had all over your face.

The night before the party, Anakin allowed Luke and Leia to stay up a smidge later than normal so that they could get all of their things ready for the party. Anakin’s special present slept soundly in the seat next to his in front of his truck. An additional gift from Luke was tucked inside along with an item from Leia who had insisted on it when she found out Luke was getting you something.. The basket being hidden away for the time being allowed him to focus completely on helping his children with their gifts at the coffee table.

Luke’s eyes were droopy as he wrote down the names of his classmates in the hearts made to look like Spiderman’s mask in his cards. He inserted most of the pencils in the intended slot on the left of the cards by himself before he slumped against Anakin’s arm and weakly pushed the pile of cards towards his dad. Anakin chuckled as he ruffled Luke’s fluffy blonde hair and teasingly whispered that he didn’t know a boy could be so sleepy. His son blinked at him as if to say how unfunny his dad was before yawning and snuggling further into his father.

Anakin pushed the rest of the pencils into the card slots and sealed all of the cards with red heart stickers. He lifted his head to look across the glass coffee table to check in on how Leia was doing. For how fiery his daughter was already at such a young age, she wasn’t immune to getting tired before 8:30. The signature buns on her head that she loved begging him to do for her had loose hairs poking out of them because of how Leia had buried her head in her arms.

Anakin blew a breath out in fond chagrin as he easily reached over the table and delicately removed the pins holding the buns in place. He fluffed out the hair that fell down so her scalp wouldn’t feel weird when she woke up.

He hoisted Luke up in one arm and Leia in the other (something they were getting a bit too big to continue doing) and slowly but surely deposited them on the couch. He snatched a white plush blanket from the linen closet and settled it over them before turning back to the massive amount of paper cards on the table. He finished the last of Leia’s cards a short while later. He sorted the cards into orderly piles and put them in sandwich bags that he took to the kids room so he could put the bags in their backpacks.

Anakin came back to the living room as he tried to shoo the sleep away by digging his knuckles into his eye sockets in a lazy rub. He opened the cabinet and took out a package of pink frosted sugar cookies with red heart shaped sprinkles, a pack of capri suns, and a tupperware bowl full of mini brownies. With a long drawn out yawn he set the snacks out on the counter so that he would remember them tomorrow morning. He got a set of paper plates and a sectioned set of cutlery in case you needed any extra. Maybe you’d give him one of those corny gold star stickers as a thank you.

Friday morning was ushered in by two children risking their dad’s life by flopping on his stomach with all the strength they had while he was sleeping.

“OH FU-“ He shouted before he remembered who was in the room and gently rolled them off of his stomach. “What exactly do you two think you’re doing?”

"It's time to wake up dad, we're gonna be late for school!" Leia said with a dismayed look on her somewhat chubby face.

Anakin looked away and meekly mouthed a 'sorry' as he looked at the led clock that he had forgotten to set an alarm on.

Fuck, not again.

He sat up in bed and hunched over; his head buried in his hands. Luke and Leia crowded around him as they tried their best to comfort their father, giving his back light pats. He let them pull his hair so that he'd look up at them. He smiled in gratitude and crawled out of bed as quickly as he could to get the day started.

He made a comical sight; hobbling around the floor with his ripped jeans pooled around his feet as he raced to get his kids ready for school in time. His belt was a fairly new black leather piece that he'd been keeping for a special occasion, but the anxiety of the morning made him grapple with getting the buckle in place. Once that was done a shameful amount of time later, he shoved his clothes to the side in his closet as he searched for a nicer, more "classy" dress shirt. Anakin gnawed at his bottom lip and eventually decided on a black silk button up that matched his belt. He crouched, chanting in his head that he hoped he wouldn't tear a muscle, and chose a pair of italian leather slides that his mom had gotten him for Father's Day a couple of years ago. The bathroom mirror held back no punches when it showed Anakin the state of his head. He crossed his fingers and smoothed back his hair with the tiniest glob of gel; the water he splashed on his face would have to do some serious charity work. He could only hope that you liked the naturally unkempt but not too unkempt kind of look, a striking sort of ruggedness.

"Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad..." Luke droned, understandably fed up with waiting on his dad to deal with another one of his mini mid life crisis episodes.

"I'll be right there Luke, hold on a second, please."

Anakin gave into his son’s begging and let him brush his teeth with the birthday cake flavored toothpaste today. Even though the dentist moaned about how hard it was to clean out when they introduced it to Luke at his last appointment. His Spiderman toothbrush played a jingle meant to sound like the theme song when Luke did his 2 minutes of brushing. Anakin stood protectively behind him as he spit in the sink, his hand hovered over his head so he wouldn't hit it. He took Luke's toothbrush and ran it under the water before he put it back in the clear organizer next to the faucet. He poured the recommended amount of mouthwash from the bottle and passed the lid that acted as the cup to Luke. Luke grimaced but he tipped the cup up so the blue liquid would pour in his mouth, he swished it around and then spat it out too. He sipped from the glass of water that was handed to him and proudly beamed at his father.

"Good job, Luke. I'm so proud of you." Anakin congratulated him, Luke was still finicky about floss so today would not be the day that he attempted to get him to use it.

Being a parent means knowing how to pick your battles and what time to schedule them.

Anakin brushed Luke's hair and fluffed it out a bit like a surfer (how Luke likes it). He grabbed his son by his underarms and lifted him off of the step stool. The mirrors in their house were still a bit too high for his kids to see properly so for now the stools had a purpose. He would be sad when they no longer needed them.

Anakin quickly dipped into the twins room to grab their backpacks. He had already gotten them dressed after he got out of bed earlier. He helped Luke put his on and then repeated the same process with Leia. Her toothbrush made a loud roar when she finished brushing, and she had a fit of giggles in response. His daughter preferred straightforward mint toothpaste so morning routines really weren't that much of a struggle with her. Once she put the glass of water down on the sink, she eagerly turned her back to her dad and pointed at her loose hair. Anakin saluted as he began shaping her hair into the buns she loves so much. He reminded her not to mess with them too much or they'd fall apart, and she always responded that she knew that already.

They got in a single file line on their mission out the door. Anakin nabbed the containers of snacks and briefly freaked out wondering if he lost the cards before he remembered that they were in the kids' backpacks. He double checked if his keys and wallet were in his pockets, and to his relief everything was where it was supposed to be.

Well, mostly everything. He'd never forget about you, don't worry.

He put his phone on do not disturb before tossing in the front seat next to his along with the basket already sitting there.

Anakin told Luke and Leia to buckle their seatbelts as he inserted his key into the keyhole and started the car. He heard them buckle up and waited for the tell tale clicks before putting his car into drive. They had to leave than some of the other kids in their school would have to since they lived farther away, but because it was so early the twins could only yawn and hold onto the other twins' booster seat. Anakin thanked the cosmos and turned the radio on but kept it a low volume; Frank Sinatra's rich voice was the best company on a drive like this.

The school entrance was abundantly decorated. A large white banner along the front entry archway announced the festivities. A flurry of red, pink, and white ribbons hung across the ceiling of the lobby. Every door had hearts representing the students in their class covering them, the kids's names scrawled in their own messy handwriting with cheap crayons.

The door of your classroom was the last one on the left. You kept a bottle of hand sanitizer in front of it because you were very particular about hygiene, a trait that served you extremely well in your job. Luke and Leia pointed out where on the door their hearts were as they waited for you to open the door. The Skywalker family were the first ones there so Anakin wasn't sure if it was okay to just drop in on you unannounced. He wished that you would drop on him unannounced. He cradled his gift basket in his arms as if it were a fragile baby.

A few minutes later, your heels were heard clacking against the tile floor. The silver door knob jiggled before it stopped moving and the door took its sweet sweet time opening. Your head poked out and your face brightened when you saw who was at the other end. You sunk down into a squat, putting your hands on your knees as you addressed the children.

"Why, hello Leia; hello to you too Luke. You're a tad early, but you can go ahead and hang your backpacks on the hooks in your cubbies. I haven't finished setting everything up, so you can sit down on any of those chairs at the front of the class." You greeted them and shook their hands before pointing out where they could sit.

The twins obviously sat together. You didn't have assigned seating in your class, and you felt that Leia and Luke would be more comfortable sitting together during their first year at school. It wasn't guaranteed that they'd be in the same class next year. You were too sensitive to try to separate them. You cried a lot because of how scary school was when you were in their place, so you couldn't imagine being the cause for any tears your students shed.

Anakin was once again too caught up in studying your outfit. You had on a fitted shirt with a cardigan on top, it had thin strings that could unwind with no effort from him if he reached out and just pulled.

But that could wait.

The kids scattered off to choose their seats. Your classroom had three circular tables with five small red chairs. Each chair had a small blanket on the back with a valentine's pattern. The table at the front where Luke and Leia were sitting had heart shaped placemats with a lace trim that looked like it should've been a doily, but in a… good way. You had red and pink plates on the smaller table next to your desk, as well as clear forks and spoons that looked like they had confetti inside of them. You figured that the parents would bring all of the refreshments and you didn't know what your students would want; you thought that the safest bet would be to hang back.

Anakin did the most he could to soften his gaze when you straightened up and automatically locked eyes with the older man. He clocked how you instantly glanced down at the floor for a split second. You adjusted your collar, for some reason, and gave him the world’s smallest smile. Anakin was so certain that if he leaned in close enough, he would be able to hear your heart racing at the same accelerated pace as his.

Some say that means it’s love.

You fluttered your eyelashes, “Hi, Mr. Skywalker, thank you for coming. It’s always a pleasure to see Luke and Leia, but i’m glad that you could be here for them”

“Believe me, no one’s more happy about me being here than I am.” He blurted out without thinking, ‘Uh, I brought some snacks and drinks for everybody.”

You took in the capri suns and the desserts as your smile grew. Your hand curled around his bicep subconsciously, “Oh my gosh, that’s so nice of you! I’ll just put those over the-“

You couldn’t even finish your sentence before Anakin sauntered past you to put the food down on the table next to your desk. He placed the frosted sugar cookies down first, followed by the capri suns and brownies.

He turned to face you and his shirt seemed to tighten over his chest as he rested his hands on his hips. His fingers flexed absentmindedly, like they wished they were gripping something else.

“I can handle it, sweetheart. I’m 42, not 72.” He chided you, strolling back over and chucking you under the chin; you were cute if you thought you’d be lifting a single finger the entire day.

The way you nearly fell head over heels trying to fix your assumed faux paus was even cuter, “No, no- I- I didn’t mean anything- I just- Y-you look very capable to me, sir.”

If your brain would let you, you would rip your face off to hide from your big mouth. Why the hell would you tell the much older father of two of your students that you think he looks “very capable”? WHAT POSSESSED YOU TO CALL HIM “SIR”?

Anakin scratched his chin and decided that he’d let you off the hook with no more teasing from him. That’s a lie though, he was confident that you could take whatever he gave you.

“Careful, don’t stroke my ego too much or I'll have to stroke yours. And please, I'd hate to have to remind you again, my name’s Anakin.” He was flirting a little too shamelessly for where you were, but he was still thinking with his upstairs head and guided you to a back corner.

“I actually got you something myself, but uh, if it’s all the same to you, I'd wait to open it until you’re nice and snug at home.”

He gladly took a short walk to your car with you and helped you set the basket down safely in the trunk. He told you to stand back as he slammed the trunk door shut; slapping it for good measure to make sure it was properly closed.

The two of you returned to your classroom and like the good little helper Anakin wanted you to know he could be, he helped you greet the incoming parents and students. He even took any concessions they brought and put them with the others

By 8:15 everyone you expected was in your classroom. A few kids were without their parents so you asked some of the other students to invite them to enjoy the party; a party’s no fun alone.

At some point around 9:00 you had the stray daydream of Anakin pinning you against the wall outside of your door as he savagely plundered your mouth with his teeth and tongue. Finger shaped bruises and a promise to ‘see you at home, baby’ would keep your usually freezing cold body warm. You glance at the man out of the corner of your eye to see that he was already staring. He looked like he wanted to teach you a lot of things.

Whatever that meant.

The morning half of the day consisted of the cafeteria delivering breakfast and watching a couple of movies that the class voted on. The Lego Batman Movie was first (a unanimous decision), and Wreck-it-Ralph was picked after that (some kids wanted to watch the minion movie like always but you were secretly happy that they weren’t the majority.)

Lunchtime was when you decided to let the students have the snacks, they were welcome to go down to the cafeteria with a guardian if they wanted actual food but they didn’t have to. You weren’t surprised when none of the seats became empty.

Anakin had to wrench the small plastic chair away from his ass before he winked charmingly and speed walked to the snack table to help you. The air between the both of you had inexplicably become charged with insurmountable tension. The chaos didn’t give you much chatting time so you could only glances and brush your arms together; how accidental those touches were was up for debate.

Especially when he needed to get through to the plates and forks behind you.

“Sorry, let me just squeeze past you.” He whispered in your ear, his big hands using your waist to steady you as he pressed his back flush against your chest.

In the blink of an eye he was gone. The invisible hands chained to your skin remained. You fanned your face with one of the cheap paper plates as you floated back to your body and got a hold of yourself.

You looked over at the Skywalker trio to see Luke and Leia point at you as they tirelessly tug on their dads sleeves until he caved. You saved him the trouble and went to them, bending down so you could hear the twins properly.

“Do you two need something? I could see you making a fuss over here.” You teased.

“Dad forgot to give you our presents….” Leia mumbled and Luke nodded sharply.

Your eyes widened, “Oh! You didn’t have to get me anything, but the day’s not over yet. You can give them to me now.”

“I did not forget, Leia.” Anakin shook his head, fidgeting in the uncomfortable chair. “They’re in the basket Dad brought, and your teacher has it in her car outside, okay?”

You nodded and confirmed their fathers words, “He’s right. I didn’t know that there were things from you and your brother in it too but it’s safe and sound. I pinky swear.”

Two much smaller pinkies met you halfway and wrapped around yours. The Skywalker twins giggled as they turned it into an impromptu arm wrestle competition and beat you easily. (You felt they were going to snap your finger off if they kept tightening their hold so you bowed out.)

Anakin watched with hearts in his eyes and his head propped up in his hand, his eyes crinkled at the inherent domesticity of the act.

Luke and Leia agreed to call their exhibition match a draw.

The sun had already set by the time you got home. You were so tired that you nearly dropped your keys down the stairwell; you didn’t want to spend your night fishing them out of the grass.The wicker basket in your arms was at risk of falling too but you got your door opened and you crumpled on the loveseat.

“Oof, I should probably get this sorted out now or I'll just forget about it.” You said as your body protested you moving a single inch from your sunken spot.

You grabbed your emerald green pair of scissors and cut the top of the plastic wrap off.The wrapping squealed as you tore it off the rest of the basket. You peered into it and thankfully it looked like a run of the mill teacher’s appreciation gift; for a valentine’s day it was a little strange but since it was from Anakin… you’d slip on your rose colored glasses.

There was a medium sized teddy bear, a couple three wick candles; your favorite was the one that smelled like the conversation hearts candy. There was also a custom made box of chocolates from the bakery you frequented, and three burgundy roses that you trimmed properly before dropping them in the vase on your kitchen island.

The ‘world’s best teacher’ stood out like a sore thumb but it made you smile anyway.

The teddy bear was incredibly fluffy and bubblegum pink; it’s holding a sparkly red heart with the word ‘princess’ sewed in hot pink thread in the center. You swept the fur away from its black eyes so it could see. The bear was pretty cute, and you had a problem handling your stuffed animal addiction, so you headed to your bedroom and laid it down with the rest of your plushies.

You yawned and your mouth stretched like a goldfish when it does the same thing. The strings of your red cardigan came undone by your hands and you let it slide off of you and hit the floor. Your pink ribbed top joined it when you gathered enough energy to give a damn and move your arms.

Your white bra was so plain but like hell if it didn’t make the man palming himself over his jeans rock hard. The kids were sound asleep in bed and the walls were thick so he could be as loud as he wanted. But this particular session wasn’t about achieving some grand climax. No. He just wanted to take things slow tonight. If he happened to gradually tumble over the edge along the way, he wouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth. Anakin loved you, every inch of your body would soon be blissfully aware of that.

The miniscule camera in the dot above the i in Princess loved you just as much.

The fire that would wait to invite itself in for a surprise visit until you had left for work loved you more.

a/n: i had this in the drafts for a bit but i was having a moment so i didn’t post it until now. happy valentine's day 💞

#dividers by cafekitsune and roseschoices #anakin skywalker #anakin x reader #star wars anakin #anakin smut #star wars x reader #mdni #tw dark content #yandere x reader #male yandere x reader #male yandere #yandere smut #anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker x reader #⚰️.deaddove

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carlyraejepsans · 9 months

Note

I’m wording this ask so terribly sorry.

So you know sans like the back of your hand and can pinpoint inaccurate portrayals of him but is it like that for the other members of the main cast too? Are there any characters you don’t really get in that way?

the funny thing is, as much as people think of me as a sans understander, the other members of the cast being more self-contained and confined to the narrative makes them a lot easier to puzzle out and put into context. undyne, alphys, asgore, toriel and flowey specifically. their roles are so crucial and defined by undertale's story that they almost work like the gears of a well oiled machine. not only are they characters in and of themselves, but with their backgrounds being available to the player and not left to speculation, every aspect of their personality become integral to What Happens In The Story as well.

when you take sans, on the other hand, his character is still so shrouded in lore and mystery that i do NOT doubt i'm also getting a fair bit of him wrong. he's an unknowable motherfucker. i can study his voice, what we know of him, and draw patterns in his behavior all i want, but at the end of the day there's still a good chunk of context to his character that is necessarily left to speculation. of course, we do have a LOT of lore for his character, and what that lore says seems... pretty direct, at least in terms of character goals and personality (he lost some people/somewhere important to him, he tried so hard to go home, he failed. he knows about the anomaly and it basically caused an existential crisis, however his first instinct was still to empathize with it. he takes everything life throws at him in stride because he doesn't believe in a happy ending anymore. he'll hold onto anything that proves him wrong)

you know who doesn't give you anything at all though?

FUCKING. PAPYRUS.

i do NOT get that guy. honest to god. sure, i can analyze his voice all the same, his personality and actions within the story, but papyrus is just as much of a lore mystery as his brother. with papyrus though? we get NOTHING. nada! he has the most lines out of any character and they tell you nothing about him. worse than that, what little info we get about sans' life "before" has almost no repercussions on papyrus whatsoever. homesickness who? scientific background who? knowledge of the anomaly who? sure, he's surprisingly strong and really passionate about puzzle construction. you can read into those aspects, but it's not anything that ties into any of sans' deal. which makes no sense because they're brothers, they got here together! why isn't sans' obvious baggage over his past something that connects them? at this point the only thing that makes sense to me is him being an amnesiac. which ig could tie into the whole "don't forget" motif. idfk man.

but like. that being said i can still more or less track the way he behaves around the other characters, the way he relates to them, his conflicts within undertale's main story etc. that's normal story analysis and pattern recognition. he's just... a bit trickier to puzzle out than the rest of the cast. goddamn him.

#answered asks #undertale #papyrus #sans

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baldursgat3 · 11 months

Text

i cannot stare at this document any longer it's 5.1k words, here she is, per request of @thisisew

cw for major character death (kind of) and ascended astarion and durge being Generally Kind Of Fucked Up I don't think anything is excessive but they're not good people

He adored having you at his side - his precious little attack dog. He soothed your bloodlust, sating it as often as he could. There was no shortage of those who wanted to get in the way of his plans for the city of Baldur's Gate. He was happy to let you curb your hunger for violence on his political rivals. Every so often though, things required a more thoughtful touch. He could just send you out with a name and a vague description and you'd be off like a shot. A few days later they would find a mangled corpse and blame it on the cult of Bhaal that still lingered beneath the city. No, someone like this, someone this important needed a special touch. You deserved time to plan this one, to savor it. Part of him wished he could go with you to watch but he knew staying away was the easiest way to keep his hands clean. He knew you were more than capable of carrying out horrors all on your own.

Things couldn't have been more perfect. After surviving nearly two centuries of a living nightmare, Astarion felt he deserved nothing less than perfection. He had suffered so long, worked so hard, he had earned this.

He stood on a balcony of the former palace Szarr, basking in the sunlight that poured over the city - his city. He had killed the local vampire lord, freed the city from the clutches of a tyrannical bastard, and rescued the universe from the devastating power of the Nether Brain. He had everything he wanted and he was adored.

More than power, fame, or freedom, one obsession had gripped his heart in a way nothing ever had before. His dearest treasure, Chosen of Bhaal. You had sunk your claws into the very essence of his being. He needed you, craved you, claimed you.

The two of you worked in tandem, like a well oiled machine. His silver tongue and nimble fingers meant he could get most things he wanted. What he couldn't get his way could, more often than not, be solved your way.

Every so often though, things required a more thoughtful touch. He could just send you out with a name and a vague description and you'd be off like a shot. A few days later they would find a mangled corpse and blame it on the cult of Bhaal that still lingered beneath the city.

No, someone like this though, someone this important needed a special touch. You deserved time to plan this one, to savor it. Part of him wished he could go with you to watch but he knew staying away was the easiest way to keep his hands clean. He knew you were more than capable of carrying out horrors all on your own.

He couldn't wait to tell you about your next target, it had really been such a long time coming. He was sure you'd be thrilled and he couldn't wait to see the sparkle in your eyes. Surely you were around here somewhere, he just had to find you.

Astarion turned on his heel, striding calmly back inside to search for his little love. It hardly even surprised him this time as he suddenly found himself with a dagger against his throat as soon as he had stepped out of the light.

"Darling, we really must work on your greetings." He purred, tipping his head back to glance at you

Your other hand wrapped around him to cup his jaw, fingers trailing delicately over his porcelain skin. "You don't like it?" You pressed the dagger just a bit firmer against his neck. "I can hardly stand it. Gods, I want to split your throat open and watch you bleed for me." You cooed, your grip on the hilt shifting as you struggled to resist the flame in you that ached endlessly, just yearning to hear your love's final breath.

But not yet. Not yet.

The threats that spilled from your lips sounded sweet as sugar to Astarion. He knew your hunger, knew that you meant every word. More than that, he knew your desperate longing to spill his blood was born of a twisted blend of the terrible love of death you held and the wonderful, perfect love the two of you shared.

Every prick of blood drawn with your dagger that was tenderly kissed away was as good as a love letter to him. He didn't mind when your fingers would find their way to his throat, trembling with the willpower it took not to crush his windpipe. It all felt like the most sincere displays of love and trust he could possibly dream of.

"Not today, pet." He wrapped a hand delicately around your wrist as you let him pull the dagger away from his throat. "I have something special I'd like to ask of you."

"Anything." You pressed in close to him, weapon still held tight as you rested both hands against his chest.

"I want you to destroy Wyll Ravenguard."

~*~*~

Your mind had spun with so many possibilities. Wyll had been such a good friend through your journey along the Sword Coast. He had attempted to comfort you in the times before your mind fully returned to you. When you rebelled against the violence that was etched into your very soul.

He was so kind, people loved him. He didn't deserve to die, and that made it so much sweeter. His death had to be perfect, you decided. You wanted it to be intimate and personal. A murder hand tailored just for your dear friend.

Of course, he hadn't stuck by your side once he had realized that his peaceful ways had no claim to the life you chose to lead with your beloved. You understood, of course. Not everyone could grasp the way murder was truly just an act of worship. After all, if everyone was a murderer, there could be no innocent victims and that would never do.

What sort of death was befitting someone like Wyll? Not only someone of such status, but someone so personally dear to you? Poison would be nice. Perhaps you could invite him to dinner. You could prepare something special, something that would have him frothing at the mouth before succumbing to the toxin.

No, no, that was far too unbecoming for someone as lovely as Wyll. Perhaps you could gut him? It would be so intimate but you didn't really want to hear him scream. It was so violent, so feral, such an ungraceful way for the son of the Grand Duke to die.

You wanted it to be soft, personal. You wanted to wrap your fingers around his beautiful neck and squeeze. Your hands twitched with your desire to feel his pulse fade under your touch. You could take him out for an evening stroll, a chance to catch up.

If you had to, you could lie about needing his help. Wouldn't that be sweet? "Oh Wyll, I'm a monster. I need help but I'm so frightened of what Astarion might say." The Blade of Frontiers surely wouldn't be able to help himself. You could almost picture the look of betrayal in his eyes already.

Yes, that was it. Lure Wyll out with a sob story, begging for his help. Then, crush the life out of him as the shock set in. Maybe if you were very lucky he'd die with your betrayal written in his eyes. It was perfect.

It was supposed to be perfect, anyway.

~*~*~

You were late. It wasn't all that concerning, not at first anyway. Astarion had expected you back within three hours. That was the time frame you gave him. Long ago, he'd learned to give you an extra hour as you seemed to be such a truly awful judge of time when you had your hands in your victims innards.

Even your extra hour was up now, though. Suddenly, his mind began to race with the worst possible scenarios. There was no way Wyll could've overpowered you. Unless he got lucky. Unless he struck first? Why would he do that, you were supposed to be lying to him?

So then where could you be? He had already resolved that the two of you would have to talk about your ability to stick within a time frame. Four hours was more than enough time to strangle someone to death. If he found out you lost track of time carving poems into Wyll's skin, he was going to be furious.

Every second that ticked by without you felt like a lifetime now. He had to go find you, he couldn't sit here anymore. What if something had gone horribly wrong and he was just twiddling his thumbs.

He practically sprinted towards the front door, only stopping short when it creaked open in front of him. He stopped on a dime as he watched you take a few, shaky steps into the palace before collapsing.

In an instant, he was at your side. He slammed the door shut behind you, barking orders to nearby spawn to get you medicine, bandages, healing potions, anything.

He bundled you into his arms, tenderly but with a near feral desperation. Dried blood stained your face, your nose was absolutely broken. You'd been stabbed multiple times and the entire right side of your body was scorched.

The way you crumpled to the ground, unable to even bask in the agony of your own wounds, something was horribly wrong. “My love… precious little love, what happened?”

He ever so tenderly cupped your jaw as you groaned quietly in pain. You squinted up at him, his eyes were so worried and you were in far too much misery to dream about plucking them from his skull. “He didn't come alone…”

An ambush? Astarion's grip on you tightened just a bit as a wave of anger coursed through his body. He had known what your plan was, what should've happened. Wyll hadn't trusted you, he didn't believe you. Of course, he was right not to, but that didn't make Astarions blood boil any less. “Who else was there?”

One of the spawn returned with a healing potion that he brought to your lips before you could respond. It wasn't much, but it was enough to dull some of the ache. You'd taken several blasts of force magic to the chest, you knew many of your ribs were broken. Definitely your sternum, you hoped he had more options that could mend that break.

“Gale.” You mumbled, blinking up at your darling. “Shadowheart, Karlach, Halsin, Lae’zel. I could've handled two or three but… six. Like he gathered everyone he possibly could…”

Wyll hadn't trusted you an inch, that was obvious. How disappointing. Another spawn arrived with more healing items that he gently administered. “Tell me what happened, darling.” He clearly had no intention of moving you just yet, he was so worried. You could practically smell the fear radiating off him.

It wasn't the same fear you craved. You craved the fear of death. The panic and knowledge that they were about to die always felt like an aphrodisiac to you. It was different when someone was afraid of someone else dying. Especially now that it was targeted at you, by your sweetest love, you could confidently say you didn't care for it.

“I thought it was perfect. He was listening, he seemed so genuine. I cried and begged him for his help, I don't know if he actually believed me.” You winced as Astarion gently started to wipe some of the blood from your face. “The instant I touched him I got a fire bolt to the chest. They swarmed like pathetic little rats.”

“Calm, darling. You need rest, you need to stay still.” His voice was even and measured. It was too perfect, you knew he was barely concealing a seething rage underneath that voice.

“They were going to kill me. Me. After everything I did for them, everything we did together. They all wanted to kill me.” The hypocrisy was not lost on you. You were there to kill Wyll after everything the two of you had been through. It was one thing for you to have murder on the mind, another thing entirely for the bleeding hearts of your ‘friends.’

“I barely managed to slip into the shadows. I could hear them hunting me still, though. I had to practically drag myself back here.” You were angry, so angry. It was supposed to be perfect. You had wanted so, so terribly badly to hear Wyll's dying breath escape his beautiful lips.

You felt Astarion move, gently and slowly, until he had his arms under you, scooping you up bridal style. You often forgot just how strong his ascension had made him, he held you with all the same effort one might hold a cat. Like you were practically nothing in his arms.

“You need to rest, my pet.” You could feel his hands trembling as he held you tight. His undead heart raced in his chest and you didn't even have the energy to fantasize about ripping it out. Rest sounded so nice.

Failing a hunt was always devastating but this was something else. You had been so excited, you never considered the possibility that Wyll would be smart enough to bring backup. You'd relied so heavily on his desire to be a hero, you really expected him to believe your sob story.

Before you knew it, your love has whisked you away to your bedroom, tucking you securely into the comfortable sheets. He sat beside you, gently brushing your hair for a moment as he watched you situate yourself and your broken body. “I'm sorry.”

You didn't expect an apology, that was interesting. “For what?”

“I should've gone with you. We should've been smarter about this and now- now look at you. They could've killed you. Tossed your corpse in the Chionthar, I would've had no way to get you back.” His eyes were dark and angry but you could see his concern written plainly behind them. He was terrified.

“I should be the one apologizing…” you wanted to reach out and grab his hand but your whole body felt so heavy. “I failed. Now they all know he's your target, we won't get another chance. And who knows what they might say.”

“They won't say anything.”

“How can you-”

“I'm going to destroy them. Every last one, understand? I'm so sorry, darling, I know how badly you want to end them but you need to rest. Please.”

“Astarion, you can't go out there, they're still going to be on high alert. They're probably closing in on the palace as we speak. There's still only one of you and six of them. I know they didn't burn all their resources on me, you can't.”

You understood his urge to kill, more than anyone in the world. Your heart broke in your chest with the knowledge that Wyll would survive the night. You had been so eager for his blood, you truly couldn't have imagined the night going this way.

In retrospect, one of you should've guessed that he wouldn't trust you. You should've been prepared for this. You were getting sloppy and that simply wouldn't do.

You tried to push yourself up a bit, fighting a losing battle against Astarion's firm hand on your shoulder that held you down. “Astarion, if you're going to go, you have to take me with you, if we're together-”

“No.” His voice was stern despite the concern that was woven through it. “You're in no state to be doing anything right now.”

“And you will die if you go out there now.” You reached out to grab his hand, staring at him, eyes wide with worry. “Please, please, I'd go mad if anything happened to you, I beg you don't do this. I'm sorry I failed you, please don't go out there.”

Astarion knew your words held a double meaning that made you far more desperate to keep him at your side. You didn't want him to go out because it was dangerous and you couldn't imagine your life without him. More than that, though, he knew if anyone else ended his life you would raze Baldurs Gate to the ground.

One day, far off in the future, he knew you would be the one to end him. You didn't have a plan, it wasn't going to be any time in the next few centuries at least. His blood belonged to you, though, as much as you belonged to him. He was going to be your magnum opus one day, he had to survive.

Leaving Wyll alive meant that he could spread rumors that you had tried to kill him. Your status in the city was… complicated. Some people revered you as a hero along with the others, some believed you were the head of the cult of Bhaal that still ravaged the city. Others still believed you were dead, that every claimed sighting of you was just another person.

None of them were entirely true, no one knew who you really were. You had helped save the city. You were important to Bhaal’s cult. You certainly weren't dead. You liked how vague it all was, it meant you could get away with things. But if Wyll was going to out you, things were going to change. Especially if he outed Astarion in the process.

Your friends knew how close the two of you were. They knew you were, together, something worth fearing. There was no doubt in your mind that one of the six people that had tried to kill you would spill this story. It would probably be in bold print on the Gazette tomorrow.

“You didn't fail me, my love.” He leaned in to place a gentle kiss on your head, breaking off the frustration and panic running through your mind. “I'll stay.”

~*~*~

He did stay, at least for a while. Just long enough for you to fall asleep. He knew you were exhausted, your body needed time to recover. You'd be out cold for hours.

Astarion stalked through the halls of the palace with an aura of malice that frightened each spawn and servant he passed. Everyone saw the flame in his eyes and no one dared to interrupt him.

How dare they? Who did they think they were? To attempt to take you away from him? They should've known better, they should've known that Astarion wouldn't stand for it.

They knew how much he loved you, were they stupid? They tried to kill you, like they didn't think it would bring the wrath of the vampire ascendant. He was going to destroy every last one of them. Did they not know you were his? Did they not realize the power he wielded?

Every second that passed by flooded his mind with images of your broken, injured body. The way they all seemed to have gotten a strike in on your beautiful, delicate skin. As though they had any right to touch you - any right to look at you.

His mind raced with “what if’s.” If you hadn’t managed to get away, if your wounds had been any worse - might he have lost you for good? At the hands of people who had once claimed to be his friends, your friends.

The idea of losing you was enough to drive him mad. His pulse raced as his attention honed in solely on making them suffer for what they had done to you. He couldn’t survive without his darling, he needed you like oxygen. He was obsessed, he knew that, he didn’t care. He had earned the right to be obsessed and now these people were threatening everything he had worked so hard for - suffered so long for. He wouldn’t stand for it.

He tossed open the ornate front doors to his palace, calmly striding out and down the steps with his arms folded casually behind his back. In his eyes, though, there was a dark malice that shone in the moonlight. “Wyll Ravenguard.” He called out, into the night. His voice was even, betraying only a hint of the rage he felt. “No use hiding, I’m sure you’ve all found your way here by now. We can discuss this like civilized adults.”

A moment passed as his voice faded away into the night air. Then a response. “The time to discuss anything has passed, Astarion.” Wyll stepped out of the shadows, blade readied. “You sent your attack dog to murder me in the streets, there’s nothing civilized about this.”

As he spoke, the others emerged into the moonlit courtyard, each prepared to strike. “I’m afraid you’ve mistaken this as a personal offense, Wyll. You are, unfortunately, a rather big obstacle in my plans for the city. I’m sure you understand, I’ve got nothing against you, personally. You simply hold a tragically high title. I know you’re no stranger to political turmoil.”

“You’re so full of shit.” Karlach spoke up, adjusting her grip on the battleax she wielded. “So the fuck what if it’s political or personal, you tried to kill him.”

Astarion sighed, rolling his eyes and folding his arms. “And you tried to kill my pet.” He bit back a grin at the revulsion that radiated off some of your former companions at his choice of words. “We've all made mistakes tonight.”

He was so calm for someone surrounded by powerful, angry warriors. He remained unfazed as they slowly closed in around him as well. “She’s too dangerous to live.” Gale spoke as he stepped closer to the vampire, hands sparking with potential magic. “Especially being wielded as your weapon.”

“And she is such an effective one too, isn't she? Well, when she isn't being betrayed, it seems.” He threw a pointed grin at Wyll.

“Betrayed? Because I'm not a gods damned idiot, I'm the betrayer?” Wyll retorted, bitterly. “I wanted to trust her. Gods, do you have any idea how hopeful I was that she genuinely wanted my help? I would've forgiven her in an instant, but I'm no fool, Astarion. Even if it had been genuine it would've taken a serious lapse of judgment to find myself alone with a Bhaalspawn at all.”

Astarion just tutted softly, looking back at him like this was all just some kind of silly game they were playing. “It's a shame, the Bhaalspawn would've killed you kinder than I will. At least with my darling, murder is such a passion. I, meanwhile, want to rip into you with my bare hands and turn you inside out for threatening to take my love from me. Do you understand that? Who you're fucking with?” His calm demeanor was starting to slip as his barely contained rage was bubbling to the surface.

Wyll seemed to recognize this, holding one hand up in defense, though the other kept his blade readied. “You're right, this is political. I don't exactly want to cause a power vacuum in the under city. I don't want to kill you or her. We were friends, once. We all were. But hasn’t she caused enough carnage?”

“What?”

“I can be quick. This doesn't have to be messy. You can't be stupid, Astarion, she wants to kill you just as badly as she wants to love you. One day it's going to be you on the receiving end of her bloodlust. We could end it now, though. Rid Bhaal of another chosen, scatter the cult. Hells, I'll let you claim it, add another notch to your fake hero belt.”

Astarion stared at him for a moment, taking in the offer that had just been laid on the table. Had he been a more sensible man, more reasonable, less utterly obsessed with you, perhaps he could've seen the logic in such an argument.

He wasn't a reasonable man, though. Instead, his eyes darkened with a fury that shocked Wyll into taking a small step back. “You're kidding? Right, you're joking? To attack my love and show up on my doorstep to demand I hand her over to be slaughtered?

“You think I don't know how badly she wants to destroy me? She spends every day itching to bleed me dry and yet, here I stand. Every morning I wake up to her sleeping peacefully beside me, it's just like falling in love again. I am her number one target and she chooses every day to spare me. I would sooner rend the fabric of reality apart than hand her over to you.”

Before he had even finished speaking, the magic that built around Gale erupted. A blue streak of lightning lit the night around them as the wizard loosed the first blow, nearly catching Astarion off guard. Nearly.

A moment before the lightning could connect, Astarion vanished. He reappeared behind Gale, lodging his dagger squarely between his ribs and twisting as he leaned in close. “You forget who you're dealing with, here. I am a fucking god.”

He shoved Gale forward, sending him crumpling to the ground. Shadowheart lunged forward, already channeling a prayer. She was stopped dead in her tracks with a snap from the vampire, however. “I suggest you reconsider.” He smirked as she straightened up, her prayer morphing and twisting. The healing energy that had been building around her coalesced into a deadly bolt of light that streaked towards the unconscious mage.

As Gale stilled underneath Astarion, the rest of the party came to life, all brandishing their weapons with the intent of taking down the vampire lord in his own courtyard. How quaint.

Their attacks narrowly avoided him, catching him not nearly as often as he struck them. Despite their best efforts, they were facing down an enemy that held more power than they could ever hope for. He wasn't truly a god, he had only a few dedicated worshipers but they could more accurately be called fanatics. Regardless, his power could rival some lesser gods.

It was different than facing down a Chosen. Power gifted to an avatar was nothing compared to what came from a gods own hand. Maybe if there had been a few more of them, perhaps if he hadn't taken out their wizard instantly, maybe they would've stood a chance.

He wasnt sure when it happened, at some point Shadowheart and Halsin disappeared. A tactical retreat or simply fleeing a fight they knew they couldn't win. It didn't matter, he could hunt them down later.

There was a feral part of him that so rarely got to see the light of day. Somewhere deep and dark in whatever remained of his soul. These kills didn't need to be clean. Perhaps, he thought, as he buried his claws into Lae’zel’s stomach, grabbing and ripping out what he could. Perhaps Gale had gotten off too easy.

Should he revive him after all this? He was so smart, he could be a useful spawn. Maybe he could even be a little gift to you. Your own little toy to torment as you pleased.

Karlach dropped to the ground, the rage and adrenaline that had been powering her through the multiple deep wounds she'd received finally giving out on her. That was all right, she could bleed out, Astarion didn't mind. Now he could turn all his attention back to Wyll.

The man stood before Astarion, despite sustaining several injuries. He still held his sword tightly, though it wavered ever so slightly. He didn't speak, his face was awash with countless emotions.

“Are you going to be a hero, Wyll? Stay and fight bravely until the bitter end? A stupid, pointless fight that's already killed two of your precious friends. And seems to be working it's magic on a third.” He nodded towards Karlach, still breathing heavy, still clinging to life.

Astarion had taken a few solid hits, he wasn't doing exceptionally well, but he was still faring much better than his old friend. “You don't have to be a hero.” He continued, watching him calmly as his wounds slowly knitted back together. “In fact, take her. Run. Go and survive and live to fight another day. You're no good to the coast dead, Mr. Frontiers.”

Wyll stared at him, eyes flicking to Karlach for just a moment. “I'm not an idiot, as soon as I turn my back you'll be on me.”

“Oh I don't know about that. I've thought of something far more fun. How about we cut a deal? I know you're a big fan of making deals that are bad for you, you should be an old pro.” The grin that spread across Astarion's face was enough to make a shiver run down Wyll's spine.

He'd seen that smirk before. That was the look of a devil who knows he's won. Something about seeing it on the face of a man who used to be his friend, it made Astarion far more intimidating than Wyll would've liked. “What… deal?”

“You leave now, I'll even let you take poor Karlach.” He threw a fake frown in her direction. “Or stay and I will gut both of you like the pitiful creatures you are. However, know that if you leave, I will hunt both of you to the ends of the world. It'll be like a game between us. One that will end with your mutilated corpses crushed beneath my boot. But you will live to protect your precious city another day.”

“Why? Just a minute ago you were content to slaughter all of us in your front yard. You won, why bother?” He didn't trust it, not an inch.

Astarion just laughed softly at him, cocking his head. “I changed my mind. Am I not allowed? No, I think I much prefer the idea of you spending the rest of your days hiding from me. I want you to go to bed every single night of your pathetic life wondering if this will be the night I put you out of your misery. Maybe I'll even send my Bhaalspawn after you to finish the job she started. Wouldn't that be fun?”

His voice was calm and collected, as though this were the most casual conversation in the world. He wasn't bluffing, and Wyll wasn't exactly interested in trying to test him. He bit his lip, his gaze shifting between Karlach and Astarion.

“Better pick fast, my friend. She won't last much longer, and I'm sure you don't want to leave her of all people with me.

“Fine. Fine, gods damn it all.” If only looks could kill, then perhaps Wyll mightve stood a chance alone against the vampire ascendant.

“I'll see you soon, my favorite little toy.” Astarion grinned like a madman as Wyll knelt beside Karlach, quickly casting a spell that teleported both of them away from the courtyard and out of view.

Astarion only chuckled to himself, rather pleased with the game he'd just made. He wouldn't even have to do much besides threaten him every so often now. And one day he would kill him, when he got bored or angry enough.

His attention turned to the two corpses left in the grass near him. Lae’zel and Gale, two incredibly powerful individuals. He could not wait until you woke up to find your new toys.

#astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #bg3 #will also admit i was playing a little fast and loose with astarions power its fine

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theriverbeyond · 1 month

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THE ANTICAPITALIST MESSAGING IN HADESTOWN TOOK ME SO COMPLETELY BY SURPRISE IN SUCH A GOOD WAY AND I HAVEN'T SEEN ENOUGH PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT IT BECAUSE ITS SO GOOD AND IT WORKS WITH THEIR STORY SO WELL

YEAH EXACTLY Im like... is it all just so obvious everyone decided it's redundant to mention or??? HELLO???

And I was sitting in the audience as one does and Chant was actually the song that reframed the entire show for me -- up until then I was like "aw :') theyre falling in love and are doomed, I should google all these lyrics later" but that song just... I felt like I was being hit in the face w a fish, honestly!!

"In the coldest time of year/ Why is it so hot down here?/ Hotter than a crucible/ It ain't right and it ain't natural"

"In the darkest time of year/ Why is it so bright down here?/ Brighter than a carnival/ It ain't right and it ain't natural"

Persephone's lyrics here are so specific -> a "crucible" is an ancient tool that can be used to create art but also industrialized into mass production, a "carnival" something that is inherently about celebration and festivity and joy but it is also a thing that can be commercialized almost beyond recognition. Capitalism is ravenous and will never be satiafied or sated, it will steal & exploit every scrap of art and joy that it can, then corrupt it all into hollow immitations that it then sells back to you on websites like SHEIN and Disney+.

"It ain't right and it ain't natural" hits so hard in this song because nothing is as natural, or as "right", as death -- so obviously Persephone is NOT talking about the literal underworld to the literal god of the dead. She's talking about how we need to stay warm and safe and dry in the winter, but we don't need fresh summer fruits imported from thousands of miles away. We need to stay cool and safe and hydrated in the summer, but we don't need to steal water from another state to keep the golf courses green. The winter is natural, the cold is natural, seeking warmth and light is natural. What is unnatural is this overconsumption, this never ending, never satisfied hunger.

And then of course you have Hades' parts,

Here, I fashioned things of steel/ Oil drums and automobiles/ Then I kept that furnace fed/ With the fossils of the dead

And wasn't it electrifying/ When I made the neon shine!/ Silver screen, cathode ray/ Brighter than the light of day

And obviously "fossils of the dead" is a reference to Hades being the literal god of the dead, in the ground, in the underworld, and it is also a reference to the modern dependence on oil and fossil fuels, but TO ME it is also about how capitalism relies on the exploitation of workers. In this show, the "fossils of the dead" are literally Hades' subjects. They're the workers of his factory town, and he both exploits them and is fully dependent on them, just like how the furnance of industry/capitalism relies on YOUR body, YOUR labor, it eats you when you're alive and it often continues to eat you when you're dead.

And then like "wasn't it electrifying" -> it's EXCITING what technology and industry does, but the problem is the overconsumption and the overproduction ("Brighter than the light of day") beyond what anyone actually needs or even wants. It ain't right and it ain't natural!!!

Every year, it's getting worse/ Hadestown, hell on Earth!

And the wind is so strong/ That's why times are so hard/ It's because of the gods/ The gods have forgotten the song of their love

Lover, what have you become/ Coal cars and oil drums/ Warehouse walls and factory floors/ I don't know you anymore

And it all keeps building in this song, re-emphasizing that Hades is not who he once was, that he has changed. Which again is not only commentary about consumption vs overconsumption, and how so many things started as wonderful ideas that could save people and help people and help make the world better were corrupted and turned into profit machines, killing machines, etc. "The gods have forgotten the song of their love" UGH

I also think the Themes are magnified because this is presented extremely directly alongside Euridyce's growing desperation, especially with the context that Euridyce DOES, in fact, "sell out" to Hades' promises.

There is no food left to find/ It's hard enough to feed yourself/ Let alone somebody else

Desperation forces her hand, she turns to Hades because he offers salvation, and she ends up just another nameless worker turning the gears of his machine. And I feel this is so similar to how when rich people are like "Just do XYZ", or telling people to bootstrap, or selling quick fixes to desperate people, when the reality is they got where they did due to a combination of luck, pre-existing social/monetary capital, etc, and buying into their promises of wealth will only make them richer and you more dependent and vulnerable.

#hadestown #30fishermen #IM JUST ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ THIS SHOW...#ask #also btw other hadestown asks i SEE U i just wanna give good responses

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roxtron · 7 months

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Day 5: Rabbit, Reclaim

AGJGDFJF FINALLY IT'S DAY 5 SO I CAN POST THIS

For some reason everytime i draw him he looks so young because i'm accidentally overcorrecting since i'm used to drawing older characters. So unfortunately he looks way younger than i meant him to lol, whoops.

But wait there's more- AHAHAHA

While I did initially plan this for GGY week I eventually got the idea to use this as an excuse to draw other GGY designs, soo..

(Not sure why tumblr formatted it that way with 1 of them big but it doesn't matter lol)

I've been wanting to do this for a while, I put the tags of each person next to their design but ofc I'm still gonna tag them in the post itself so you can see their art for yourself if you haven't already. But I enjoyed each of these in their own ways so if you don't mind I think I'm gonna type a bit of text next to them..

@chipistrate This was one of the first I drew out of these, the design was pretty fun to draw but sorry if I messed up a few details, it was a bit difficult lol. The mask and goggles are really fun to draw and they make for a cool design, along with all the glowing blue. (and yes, I tried to subtly include the heelies lol)

@lunzi0 This was the first fursuit one I did lol. I adore the little stars in the design, they personalize it so well and make it really unique. I wanna try this design again since I feel like the other ones show my improvement a bit better, but I hope you can appreciate the effort I put in on my first attempt <3

@carouselrabbit This one was really fun to draw, I absolutely love the eye shape/lashes, it stands out and I always love drawing eyes with a bit of eyeliner lol, the daycare theme legwarmers is a cool nod to the balloon boy arcade machine being connected to them, and was just a fun addition in general lol, I like the style of legwarmers what can I say, fnaf changed my fashion sense a bit. also the subtle paraells to freddy's design is a nice way to connect a bit to gregory himself.

@puhpandas I can't remember if I talked about this design last time I drew it but, overall I'm really happy with how this came out, it's such an indicator of improvement since I started drawing this and I'm glad I was able to draw it better than last time lol. All the patchwork and similarities to Vanny's suit work really well, and the rabbit you chose to base it off of was a good fit, the colors make it a bit more difficult to shade for but i like detail lol, hope you like it too :)

@dykevanny I knew I wanted to do this since I started but I wasn't sure if I'd have time, and I'm glad I did! I hope you don't mind I combined aspects from the first design I saw and the second one you replied to my ask with, I liked the big purple sleeves lol. (I just realized after doing all the shading I forgot to include the oil splatter on his jacket, sorry!) It was definitely a bit difficult due to the head shape being so different but.. fluffy. i love drawing fluff. And the glowing swirl on the goggles, the shape of the ears, I love a lot about this design. :D

I have a hard time with writing compliments but I wanted to get some of those thoughts out, some of the things I like about these designs apply to multiple lol. I adore every one of these designs but I find it hard to put into words what I enjoy about them, hope the original creators are happy with these. <3

I also kept the ggys without as much lighting effects on a separate file, I felt like I should add them since they're a bit brighter lol, makes them look different.

Okay now that I've gotten all that- Sorry this post is so long! I didn't think it'd end up taking up so much space lol. Buut.. working on this drawing and thinking about it and potential context behind it gave me an au idea for it, but I'll put it under the cut since I understand most people probably won't care and just wanna see the drawings lol.

Idk if I'm confident enough to write for it but I'll give a bit of a summary.. I'll keep it under the cut for people who aren't interested and just wanna see the art though lol.

After the main events of SB and Ruin, now that the mimic's been set free, Cassie's taken control of by what's left of Vanny, using her as a new host. But with Cassie being the only human left alive down there, after being reawakened, Dr. Rabbit has nowhere left to go but back to his old host.

Vanessa, Freddy, and Gregory hadn't gone back to the Pizzaplex after ruin, but they were trying to figure out a plan to get Cassie back safely. One night after Freddy and Gregory disappear, Vanessa leaves to go find them. As dangerous as the pizzaplex is, it's her best guess for where they might've gone. She doesn't want to think about what could've happened to them, in denial for the worst case scenario. She tries to keep herself calm by telling herself they probably just left to go back for Cassie, maybe they didn't want her stopping them.. but deep down she knows it can't be that simple. She knows something's off, even if she's not ready to admit it.

When returning to the pizzaplex, she brought along her own V.A.N.N.I. mask, though unlike the one Cassie used, it was clear of the mimic's influence. After all, she was going to need some way to travel through potential blocked routes.

By the time she found Gregory, she'd still been wearing the mask, seeing him down the end of a dark hallway. He looked confused, afraid, his mind was a wreck of conflicting emotions. She started rushing towards him, happy to see him okay, until he finally spoke.

"You need to get out of here."

She stepped back, taking off the mask, only to be faced with the worst case scenario.

It was a wreck, covered in stains and tears, but it was still recognizable. He was wearing that old suit again.

As he waved, she could see Freddy's claws peeking out from the doorway, as the two stepped closer towards her.

So, she did what he told her to do, and started running. She could hear a faint voice coming from the mask, and put it back on before finding somewhere she could hide.

It was his voice again, telling her which way to go.

I guess that was the dramatic way to summarize the main idea behind it, lol. Basically Gregory and Dr. Rabbit work the way Sun and Moon work in Ruin, whichever one is in control in the real world, the other is left behind in the AR world. Or at least that's my interpretation of how they worked, considering Sun was always in mask-on scenes and moon was mask-off. I'm not too sure where the plot might go from there, and maybe I'll consider writing for it, I dunno. I've never wrote fanfic before because I get deadly afraid of writing them out of character lol, but maybe?? I have ideas for scenes and premise and stuff but I don't know if I have the confidence to write it.

But anyway! That was just more of a fun side-idea I came up with while working on this, if you read this far thanks, hope you enjoyed :)

here's some silly little lineless doodles as a reward for making it to the end hehe

now that's what I call an art dump

@ggyweek2024

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that-starry-freak · 29 days

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Okay, wow, uhm-

This is my rant about Eclipse x Solar x Nexus i keep saying ill do. Sooo- yeah. If you don't like it, just scroll. Or block me i don't give a shit- im just ranting about what I like *shrug* (btw this is 95% for/about my tol au, so-)

Cw i do mention abuse a few times, because of Solar's Moon, dark sun, etc.

God i love these three so much. There's just so much potential, both angst and fluff (and a bit of smut but that stays in my head that is NOT going on my blog)

Like Solar and Nexus are both such needs and idiots. They both stay up late working, and insist the other one goes to bed (Eclipse ends up having to drag them both to bed).

They love working on projects together. People arnt usually allowed int he workshop when their working together, because if they have each other they don't need anyone else to help or anything- but they let Eclipse in once, and he got to see how they danced around each other and worked together perfectly.

They're all nerds who love science and mechanics tbh, but they all like it in different ways. Solar likes the hard work, the mindlessly fixing things. He liked the manual labour, the more mechanics of it. Nexus loved the science. He loves asking questions and learning knew things. He loves questioning things and people. He likes building and creating and testing out code. Eclipse likes the results. He doesn't particularly enjoy coding and building, it makes him frustrated, but he loves the results. He likes having a job well done. And getting to enjoy whatever the product is, whether its a computer or a basic machine.

Eclipse and Nexus can also understand each other. They can understand the expectation of who you're supposed to be. To be a remake of someone dead, but not really being them. Yet everyone expects you too. They've spent long nights sharing a smoke and ranting about how unfair it is. About how they weren't v1 Eclipse, or Moon. That they were themselves, and it wasn't fair people pressured them into being their predecessors.

Solar and Eclipse can understand what its like to be an eclipse. To come into this world with Moons hating you. To be called vile, to have a Moon laugh in your face. They may not have always liked each other, but they understand each other, its one of the reasons they became close.

Nexus can also help them both heal from their trauma of Moons. Plus, he isn't really Moon. Sure, he is a moon, coming from he dame basic code. But he isn't an old Moon. He's kinder, he doesn't blow up as easily. Its reassuring to them both, being treated so kindly to someone who pretty much abused them both (Eclipse didn't deserve how Old moon treated him when he came into this world.)

Eclipse and Nexus also know what its like to be left behind. Eclispe knows what its like to be left behind by Moon, to be a piece of code that he doesn't care about. Nexus knows what its like to hurt people and lose them. Yes, its different, but that doesn't mean they can't empathize with each others pain, because it is similar in a way.

solar and Nexus can understand each other's pain of losing someone you care about deeply. Of blaming yourself for their death. Of course. They dealt with it much differently, but still-

Eclipse and Solar both knowing what its like to die, comforting each other, reassuring them that they're still here. That they're alive. That they're them.

Enough about what they have in common tho-

like oh my goddd. I have so many thoughts bro-

Eclipse smells like cigarettes and leather and faintly of the vanilla candles Puppet lights in their apartment. Solar smells like grease and oil and sometimes chemicals when he cleans himself off (and then is forced to take an actual shower by Eclipse because cleaning yourself with harsh chemicals every time cant be good for your casing). Nexus smells like lavender (because thats the scent of the detegerant Sun always washes their clothes with) and faintly of bleach (consequences of living in the same house as Sun) and grease a lot after he's been working. The other twos smells are comforting to all three of them, reminding them that they're safe and content. Nexus eccpecially loves wearing Solar's clothes, and loves being in his arms, reminding him that he's alive. Thats he's right here. That everything is going to be okay.

And oh my god don't get me started on the forbidden love. The fact that Eclipse and Solar can't be in the same dimension till Eclispe gets a new dimensional signal. Solar and Nexus both crushing on Eclipse, but Nexus is the only one that can actually see them both, having to pass messages between the two. Of course they do eventually get to see each other again, but for so long they won't be able to. Its just.. sad

And AUGH im always going to be insane over rmy true loves kiss idea. The idea of Solar kissing Nexus out of desperation, because nothing he says can get through to him and ohmygod he's panicking- and somehow the virus he has just disappearing. The kiss curing Nexus, and bringing him back to his senses. And oh my god, the chaos and angst that follows. Nexus sobbing becuase of what he's done, feeling so guilty. The family not wanting to accept him back, Moon being the worst one-

Solar and Eclipse being the first ones to accept him. Later being Sun, Earth, and then Lunar. Maybe one day Moon, but thats a day far in the future.

And auggh, Solar and Moon's friendship. Moon hating his boyfriends but midly tolerating them for Solar's sake. Solar aclimating him to Eclipses, and he starts tolerating him a bit more. Hearing him say so many good things about Nexus makes him hate him more, though, insecure about Nexus being back in the family. Afraid of being replace.

Sleaking of being replaced, Nexus feeling like he's replaceable. That he's disposable. That one wrong move and he'll be thrown out again. Solar reassuring him that even if he is hell go with him. That he refuses to let Nexus be completley abandoned and manipulated again.

And god, all three of them have such communication, trust, and attachment issues-

Solar feels like he has to be useful to be loved. That he has to prove himself. That he could also be thrown out of the family because he's not from this dimension. He's afraid of being a burden. He's afraid that if he complains he'll be seen as a nuisance. That he doesn't deserve help or to get anything, that he barely deserves the celestial family as it is even if he does so much for them.

Nexus also feels like he has to be useful. That if he isn't, what is he for? What was his purpose if he can't help? He compares himself to Moon a lot, feeling like he has to match up to his standards, even if they're impossible. Moon has years and years of experience on him- he also struggles to talk about his own feelings. He bottled them up so much because he felt like they were stupid that he just doesn't know how to talk about them. The only time he can is in the middle of the night, and is usually with Eclipse. Solar will try to comfort him and almost baby him when he tries to rant to him, Eclipse will just complain and rant right back though, and he prefers it.

Eclipse didn't really ever have any healthy relationships. He's used to pushing people away and bottling all his feelings up. To lashing out at people. Yes, this version is much calmer, but he still has the memories of the ones before him. Hes still used to that being what Eclipses in this dimension did. He doesn't know how to talk to people. Earth helped him open up though, and Solar and Nexus helped him more. He's a lot calmer now, and it helps that they both enjoy listening to him rant. Solar will listen to him and gives advice, while Nexus will just complain with him in the middle of the night. He loves both, though it depends on the situation for what he wants to do.

Their relationship isn't perfect, though. Nexus will still sometimes yell and freak Solar out, and he has to frantically apologize while Eclipse calms him down. Eclispe sometimes will push them away, and will sometimes use their insecurities and trauma against them when hes frustrated eith them. Solar refuses to talk about his own issues, and it worried the other two to no end. Nexus sometimes will hit himself or bite himself to the point of denting his casing when he's frustrated or having a breakdown, not wanting to lash out at anyone, and this worries the other two so much but there's nothing they can really do to stop it, just comforting Nexus the best they can and restraining him when they see him doing it. Eclipse will be rude to Nexus, treating him like Moon, and they'll get into fights about it that they both always regret later.

The hallucinations Nexus suffers from also doesn't end. He still sees Solar telling him he isn't proud of him. He sometimes gets vivid hallucinations that Solar is still dead.

They also all suffer from horrific nightmares

Solar dreaming that he's still in his original dimension. That he's still being abused by his Moon. That he still has no one to love him. He has nightmares that he's still dead, that Nexus never got better. He has nightmares that he ends up like Eclipse, that he hurts people. He has nightmares that the family shuns him and kicks him out. He has nightmares that old moon shows up at his dimension again and he can't stop him this time, and he hurts him and everyone he loves.

Nexus dreaming of Solar still dead. Nexus having nightmares that he actually killed his family. He has nightmares that he's still under Dark Sun's control. He has nightmares that he never was saved from space. He has nightmares of Eclipse betraying and killing him, never having truly gone good. He has nightmares that the family kicks him out for not living up to their expectation, for not being good as moon.

Eclipse dreaming of Moon. Nightmares of Bloodmoon torturing him, of Moon hurting him, of Lunar killing him again. Nightmares of him betraying everyone, even though that's the last thing he wants to do. Nightmare of Earth hating him, of Solar an Nexus hating him.

They often have to comfort each other from these night terrors, holding them close as cooing to the and rocking them.

Solar panics and sobs when he wakes up from one, but refuses to talk about it. He shuts down once when calms down, and often gets up in the middle of the night after to mindlessly do work to get his mind off of it.

Nexus wakes up screaming and crying and often hallucinating. He ususally has to be restrained so he doesn't accidentally hurthimself. He always feels bad about it after, and just wants to cuddle and feel loved, reminding himself that his partners are here and they're real.

Eclipse wakes up in a cold sweat, quiet. Hell just sit there for awhile, before getting up to take a cold shower to clear his mind.

they all overwork themselves, Solar and Nexus eccpecially-

solar because he needs to feel useful. Also because working helps him not think, it helps him "relax", even if it stresses him out more.

Nexus because he'll get so caught up in what he's doing. He'll start working at like noon and he'll zone out and suddenly its midnight and Eclipse and Solar are coming down to drag him away from his lab. Or Sun, sometimes sun has to come after him.

They're just so sad and gay and such a polycule i love them <3

Im so normal about them, clearly (im sorry this is too long im not going to go through this and edit rn- there probaly really a lot of grammar errors and typing errors and spelling errors but im tired soo-)

#astro rants #Astro is YAPPING #Sams au #Eclipse² #Eclipse x nexus #Nexuschips #Mechanical lullaby #Solarnexus #Eclipse x eclipse #Solar x nexus #Eclipse x solar x nexus #Tsams ships #Tol au #Tsams #the sun and moon show #Okay thats enough tagging I think-#Cw cursing #cw abuse mention #Tell me if the there's any other cw I need to add

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gabessquishytum · 7 months

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Dream's a software developer (I could see either as an architect for that large-scale view mentality or as the Senior level dev that keeps getting asked to move into management type positions and just straight up refuses because he's been doing code happily for the past fifteen years and doesn't plan on changing that now).

He enjoys his job enough. He likes computers and code. It functions exactly as told (for better or worse) and appreciates the straightforwardness of it all. He's a bit insufferable to work with, but if you have an issue, he'll readily help (just be prepares for critiques on your code in the process).

Hob works at the same company as Dream, but as a front-end dev. The work he does for his day job is kinda boring. All standard corporate style web design. No fancy scripts or fun colors. But in his spare time, he weaves Javascript and CSS like a wizard and creates magical, animated scenes across the page. Would it be easier to just make a video and play it on the page instead? Sure, but where's the fun in that?

Dream and Hob get paired together on a small side project for work. Hob does the front-end work, Dream does the back-end. They get on each other's nerves at first, until Dream spots Hob tinkering with his personal code on their lunch break and is honestly a bit in awe. He's found code beautiful in its own right (the way one appreciates a well-oiled machine) but he's never seen it wielded in such a fashion before. This is the moment he falls just a little bit (read: a lotta bit) in love with Hob. He was already starting to fall for that endless charm and wit of his anyways.

The company hits the first quarter of the New Year and with it come layoffs. Hob gets fired along with some other devs from Dream's same team (a younger pair of devs: Matthew and Jessamy). A fellow named Will comes along to help Dream finish the project in Hob's stead and Dream hates every moment of it. He misses Hob, more than he ever thought he would.

So, in an impulsive rush of anger and longing, he quits the company because how dare it toss someone as good as Hob Gadling out the door without a thought? He's halfway to the café he and Hob had started frequenting together when he realizes that he's just thrown away a career fifteen years in the making. But when he finally gets to the café and sees Hob tapping away on his laptop, he knows he's made the right choice.

Dream slides into the seat across from him and proposes that they build something wonderful together. So they create a small business of their own. They become a freelance web dev team (and steal Jessamy and Matthew as well) and with their skills combined, they take off. It's not huge, but for their size, they're incredibly popular. And Dream's certain he's never enjoyed his work more than when he's working beside Hob.

Later on, Hob proposes to Dream via a custom website with the most beautiful web animations he's ever seen before. And of course, he says yes.

(If you're curious about what inspired this, here's the website: http://www.species-in-pieces.com)

This is such a good concept for a story!!! I really really love aus where Dream and Hob are coworkers. Dream being the grumpy, awkward guy who hides behind his coffee mug while Hob is the popular, chatty one who tries to get Dream involved in fun office activities or socialising after work - it makes so much sense to me.

And Dream quitting his long-term dream job because he's mad that genuinely talented people have been laid off? I love it. Dream just has this inate appreciation for hard work and good art, and that's exactly what Hob (and Jessamy and Matthew) do. How dare the stupid company not understand that they're firing people who deserve to thrive and grow in an environment which actually appreciates them? Everyone is shocked that Dream has quit (not only that, he sends around an email to everyone in the company from the ceo all the way down to the work experience guy, outlining exactly why he quit) because he seemed to be the type to play by the rules and never leave his comfort zone. Apparently, Hob has really helped him bloom into a much more confident person, able to express his principles and strive for better.

And Hob isn't surprised, because he always knew that Dream had the courage, talent and ambition to strike out on his own. Maybe he just needed a bit of love and understanding. Which Hob is only too happy to provide.

Their work together sometimes involves long hours and stress, but Dream wouldn't ever want to go back to the slightly soulless corporation where he used to be. Even if he's tired and a little frustrated by Hob’s disorganised workspace, Dream is perfectly content. There's nothing better than curling up in Hob’s lap while he taps away on a line of code. Plus, he has a great time building their wedding website. Hob got to propose, so Dream gets to celebrate their upcoming marriage with his own expression of love through code. The theme colours are, of course, black and red <3

#kydrogendragon #the sandman #dreamling

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rainbowsky · 6 months

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Hi Rainbowsky, hope you are well. ☺️✨

In the last few weeks there has been a lot of hate, lawsuits, hot trends etc like the usual so/o stuff…nothing new surprise surprise. 🙄 I was thinking maybe if xz or yb made a statement that there is no bad blood between them, (they don't have to come out or make it clear that they are friends privately) but more like "yeah we worked together and are still on good terms" and "please don't attack or make false rumours about the other person" would the hate die down a bit or do you think it will get worse? I know it's not their job to give brain cells to mindless so/os, but maybe it could help newer fans who joined the fandom just so they wouldn't jump on the hate bandwagon because of so/os. It must be exhausting for xz and yb with all the hate, suing accounts, planning how to avoid the other person at award show because of stupid “fans” etc.

These are just some of the thoughts I've been having over the last few days. Are my thoughts too simple? I don't know if xz or yb made a statement already or if you've talked about this before, if so I'm sorry for filling your question box unnecessarily.

thank you for reading my question 🥰 I wish u a beautiful day and enjoy your weekend ✌🏽☺️

Hi Jinniecooky! Thanks, I hope you're well too! ☺️

Unfortunately I really don't see a statement improving things. It would be too risky on various fronts and would likely only make matters worse.

These fan groups are organized, well-oiled machines - especially GG's. The leadership of these groups tells the fans what to do and how to act, they give strict guidelines on what is expected of the fans, and any fan who wants to be included has to stay in line and do, say, believe as they're told.

Part of that involves selling narratives created and perpetuated by these fandom leaders and their corporate black pr embeds. They come up with elaborate stories that cast the star as a selfless, brilliant hero who is in a grand cosmic battle against 'those who want to destroy them', often with detailed claims and photoshopped or misleadingly edited/framed 'evidence' to support those claims.

Fans get sucked into these narratives and believe with all their hearts that the stories are true. They spend countless hours online spreading these lies and battling these imagined foes. They spend all their money on endorsements - whether they can afford it or not - and all their spare time on boosting the star's numbers on every platform and in every way they can.

As a result they have a deeply rooted conceit that they know what's best for the star, that the star owes their fame and success to fans, and that their activities - as hateful as they often are - are nothing less than the devoted, dedicated, selfless, heroic hard work on behalf of the star.

A statement like this would be treated as ingratitude, and would cause a lot of uproar and anger. These toxic fans would lose a lot of face if such a statement was issued, because it would run against everything they've been and stood for up until this point. The fan groups would likely try to recover by turning against the star and their management - making an even bigger mess for the star to clean up.

As I've said many times - toxic fan culture is about power and status. It's about these fans and fan groups wanking over their star being the biggest, best, etc. The bigger and more successful the star, the more of an ego boost these fans get out of it.

Speaking against anything these fans say or do cuts into that power and status in a way that can be very dangerous. We've all seen how people who speak up against them are treated. Trust me - the star and his team would fare no better if they spoke up.

The serious, long-standing fans who are deeply embedded in fan culture - especially the leadership figures in these fandoms - often know 'where the bodies are buried', too. They've made it their business to know all the dirt on their star, all the better to keep his image clean and bury the story. These are not the kind of people a star will want on their bad side.

In many ways, stars are hostages to their fan groups. These are the people pushing to build their numbers and success, and they can be very fickle, demanding and nasty.

Not only that, a statement would only draw more attention to these battles and bring them into the mainstream where passersby would see all the dirty laundry that's currently confined mostly to fandom spaces. It could escalate everything into an even bigger scandal that could burn out of control and possibly permanently damage or destroy the star.

There's also the fact that GG and DD will not want to risk the nature of their relationship becoming a bigger public story.

And that's before we even get into the fact that they've released dozens of statements over the years - especially GG - trying to get fans into line, giving guidelines on fan behavior, etc. and these toxics have ignored every word of it.

Overall, I just don't see a statement helping at all, and would likely only make matters worse.

I've often felt their best bet would be to come out as friends in a setting where fans dare not fuck with things. For example, appearing onstage together at a nationalistic event or in a nationalistic program.

But that's unlikely to ever happen for various reasons. Appearing together would put both of them at huge risk. Such an appearance would inevitably draw a lot of attention and gossip. Even if it was mostly positive due to fans trying not to cause any trouble, GG and DD would overshadow the message and gravity of the occasion. It would make them look bad - at best, traffic stars (images they're trying to shed), at worst, disrespectful or irreverent to the government or serious occasion.

And one would have to accept the possibility that even such a serious occasion under the eye of the government wouldn't be enough to stop fan wars from happening.

At the end of the day, it's just safer for GG and DD to let things run their course and hope that these assholes eventually lose interest and move on. To accept fan wars and haters as just part of the cost of doing business.

Similarly, I think we need to just accept that haters gonna hate, and stop focusing on haters and antis. We're not here for other fans, we're here for GG and DD. If we put our focus there and block and ignore all the toxics, we can enjoy fandom - which is the entire point.

Recent post related to this topic:

GG and DD supposedly collaborating on a new movie

#bjyx #yizhan #solos belong to moling su sect #antis go home #ask

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clairewritesandrambles · 1 month

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b, d, and j from the NSFW alphabet for scott? ❤️‍🩹

Thank you!! I did this with a f!reader in mind, so be aware that my descriptions will follow that accordingly.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Scott is a boob guy for SURE. He appreciates ass as well, especially because his favourite position is probably doggy because of how rough he can get… But god he loves to put you in positions where he can watch your tits bounce and grope them easily. If you want one that is more sweet - I think he’d really like his partners hair, he likes to comb through it with his fingers while you two lay together.

As for himself? He's so confident, I think he would have a hard time picking a favourite. He works like a well-oiled machine, every part of him has been trained to make himself appealing. But if he REALLY had to pick, it's probably his arms and hands. He knows they're hot, he knows he's strong and he knows that he can make someone scream within a few minutes of touching them. If he's not focused on sex, maybe his hair. Even though he hides it in a hair, he would be someone who puts a lot of work into his hair when it's able to be seen.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Even though Scott would mostly be a dom in the bedroom and choose positions where he is on top so that he can be in control, he would love it if you got on top and took control for a while. Whether that's controlling how you're bouncing on his cock while he has a hand on your hip and your tit or you sitting on his face, it's something that would turn him on like crazy - but he would never admit it.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Scott has no problems jacking off while he looks at pictures of you on his phone, but I really think he seems like a guy who would take polaroids of you to look at while he jacks off. He's got a whole album that only leaves his bag when he's alone and it's filled with photos of you in different positions and different lingerie and he flips through it every time he misses you.

#twisters #scott miller #scott twisters #scott miller x reader #twisters scott #claire rambles

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tangibletechnomancy · 2 years

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How To Use AI To Fake A Scandal For Fun, Profit, and Clout

Or, I Just Saw People I Know To Be Reasonable Fall For A Fake "Ripoff" And Now I'm Going To Gently Demonstrate What Really Happened

So, we all know what people say about AI. It's just an automatic collage machine, it's stealing your data (as if the rest of the mainstream internet isn't - seriously, we should be using that knee-jerk disgust response to demand better internet privacy laws rather than try to beef up copyright so that compliance has to come at the beginning rather than the end of the process and you can be sued on suspicion of referencing, but I digress...), it can't create anything novel, some people go so far as to claim it's not even synthesizing anything, but just acting as a search engine and returning something run through a filter and "proving" it by "searching" for their own art and "finding" it.

And those are blatant lies.

The thing is, the reason AI is such a breakthrough - and the reason we memed with it so hard when DALL-E Mini and DALL-E 2 first dropped - is because it CAN create novel output. Because it CAN visualize the absurd ideas that no one has ever posted to the internet before. In fact, it would be a bigger breakthrough in computer science if we DID come up with an automatic collage machine - something that knows where to cut out a part of one image and paste it onto another, then smooth out the lighting and colors to make them fairly consistent, to make it look like what we would recognize as an image we're asking for? That would make the denoising algorithm on steroids that a diffusion model is look like child's play.

But, unlike the posts that claim that they're just acting as a collage maker at best and a search engine at worst, I'm not going to ask you to take my word for it (and stick a pin in this point, we'll come back to it later). I'm going to ask you to go to Simple Stable (or Craiyon, or the Karlo demo, if Google Colab feels too complicated for you - or if you like, do all of the above) and throw in a shitpost prompt or two. Ask for a velociraptor carousel pony ridden by a bunny. Ask for Godzilla fighting a wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man. Ask for an oil painting of a capybara wearing an ornate princess gown. Shitpost with it like we did before these myths took hold.

Now take your favorite result(s) and reverse image search them. Did you get anything remotely similar to your generated image? Probably not!

So then, how did someone end up getting a near perfect recreation of their work? Was that just some kind of wacky, one-in-a-million coincidence?

Well - oh no, look at that, I asked it for a simplistic character drawing and it happened to me too, it just returned a drawing of mine that I never even uploaded, and it's the worst drawing I've done since the fifth grade even just to embarrass me! Oh no, what happened, did they change things right under my nose, has digital surveillance gotten even WORSE?? Look, see, here's the original on the left, compare it to the output on the right - scary!! They're training on the contents of your computer in real time now, aaaagh!!

Except, of course, for the fact that the entire paragraph above was a lie and I did this on purpose in a way no one could possibly recreate from a text prompt, even with a perfect description.

How?

See, some models have this nifty little function called img2img. It can be used for anything from guiding the composition of your final image with a roughly drawn layout, to turning a building into a dragon...to post-processing of a hand-drawn image, to blatantly fucking lying about how AI works.

I took 5 minutes out of my day to crudely draw a character. I uploaded the image to this post. I saved the post as a draft. I stuck the image URL in the init_image field in Simple Stable, cranked the init strength up to 0.8, cleared all text prompts, and ran it. It did exactly what I told it to and tried to lightly refine the image I gave it.

If you see someone claiming that an AI stole their image with this kind of "proof", and the image they're comparing is not ITSELF a parody of an extremely well-known piece such as the Mona Lisa, or just so extremely generic that the level of similarity could be a coincidence (you/your favorite artist do/es not own the rule of thirds or basic fantasy creatures, just to name one family of example I've seen), this is what happened.

So from here you must realize that it is deeply insidious that posts that make these claims usually imply or even outright state that you should NOT try to recreate this but instead just take their word for it, stressing ~DON'T FEED THE MACHINE~. It's always some claim about "ohhh, the more you use them, the more they learn, I made a SACRIFICE so you don't have to" - but txt2img functions can't use your interaction to learn jack shit. There's no new information in a text prompt for them TO learn. Most img2img models can't learn from your input either, for that matter! I still recommend being careful about corporate img2img toys - we know that Facebook, for instance, is happy to try and beef up facial recognition for the WORST possible reasons - but if you're worried about your privacy and data harvesting, any given txt2img model is one of the least worrying things on the internet today.

So do be careful with your privacy online, and PLEASE use your very understandable knee-jerk horror response to how much extremely personal content can be found in training databases as a call to DEMAND better privacy laws ("do not track" should not be just for show ffs) and compliance with security protocols in fields that deal with very private information (COMMON CRAWL DOESN'T GO FAR OUT OF ITS WAY, IT SHOULD NEVER HAVE BEEN ABLE TO GET ANY MEDICAL IMAGES THE PATIENTS DIDN'T SHARE THEMSELVES HOLY SHIT, SOME HOSPITAL WORKERS AND/OR MEDICAL COMMUNICATIONS DEVELOPERS BETTER BE GETTING FIRED AND/OR SUED) - but don't just believe a convenient and easy-to-disprove lie because it aligns with that feeling.

#generated artwork #sort of #not art #also sort of

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venomous-ragno · 2 years

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I've posted these before but Tumblr's tag system is buggy so it's not showing up for ppl, which is a shame cause if this dynamic rots my brain y'all have to suffer with me

Ghost x reader x Soap headcannons

I take requests btw;)

Tags: Ghost x reader x Soap, sfw, gn!reader, fluff

Warnings: None

Gif by @collinnmckinley

• Brothers in arms, these two have developed a bond that goes deeper than that of just any comrades. They work like a machine, gears oiled and intertwined, always moving forward and further into unknown territory.

• Ghost and Soap aren't romantically involved, but they don't mind it if it's the other. Both know and respect the other's boundaries; Gaz once called them psychics for understanding each other without so much as words exchanged.

• Their lives are anything but conventional so why shouldn't their relationship be too? It's a strange idea, sure. Much to your surprise though neither seemed taken aback or even shocked at the suggestion - not in the slightest, for they agree on more things than they disagree on.

• If you ever go on a mission with them and the team gets split up, both Ghost and Soap would find solace in knowing you're with the other, that you're well protected even in the face of death.

• Ghost and Soap are two different types of love; Ghost is more of a calm, quiet lover. No big words or pda but rather small acts of service and quality time. Ghost remembers all your quirks, all your likes and dislikes by heart. He prides himself in knowing you better than anyone else, reads you like an open book, and slowly... Opens up in and about himself, too.

• Soap is loud, if not a bit boastful. He doesn't mind calling you sweet nicknames, throwing a flirty line or two over comms. His love languages are words of affirmation and physical touch, and he isn't shy about giving nor receiving. He's quite sensitive to personal space and highly receptive of your emotional state.

• You know that Ghost has a hard time conveying his thoughts and feelings. Hell, he can't even decipher them himself most of he time. Comes with the life he agreed on living, doesn't make it any more frustrating when he refuses to elaborate on decisions he's made.

• Soap understands you both. He's had his fair share of troubles with the stoic Lt, and thus acts as a mediator. He jokingly calls himself the "peacekeeper of the 141", taking the deadly stares from both of you with stride.

• Ghost and Soap often share late night talks. It's an intimate moment between these two on an emotional level: Let the stars be witness to their hopes and dreams, their frustrations and fears, let their heart get lighter until the sun shines on them and reminds them of the hardships daylight brings.

• It's nights like those where Soap nudges Ghost in the right direction when it comes to you. Gentle but stern pushes towards an apology, in whichever form it may come in, Ghost's words carry nothing but candour. Be patient and he'll do his best to learn.

• "Live as if you're dead", they say, but how can one not feel alive when you love pulses hot through their veins? They should know better. They should know better than to let themselves fall for you like so and yet they're utterly powerless, for no knife may cut that damned red string.

Bonus:

Price raises a brow at whatever you three got going on, but chooses to remain ignorant as long as it doesn't affect work. If anything, he finds amusement in it; how the three of you bicker back and forth, how your dynamic confuses everyone not sharp enough to catch on. Besides, he's won quite a few bucks over drunken bets with Gaz - and he gets to see Simon more often too, rather than Ghost. A bonus if anything.

#call of duty #call of duty fanfic #ghost x reader #soap x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #call of duty headcanons #call of duty x you #cod mw2 imagine #call of duty soap #cod mw2 fanfic #call of duty ghost #call of duty mw2 #call of duty x reader

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swingingthehatchetnow · 5 months

Text

My take on a Pokémon AU for SAF

Buckle up, cause this is going to be a long one

Also I have not looked at anyone else's ideas for this AU because I want to have my own

Some of my mutuals were discussing this and I cant just not put my own 2 cents in. When I make Pokémon AUs, I tend to take a slightly modified approach to the Pokémon universe, because a lot of the lore of Pokémon stems from game mechanics and anime that isnt always consistent

For Curt and Owen, I tried to contain their Pokémon to ones that can be found in Unova and Galar respectively. Unova is modeled after New York, and so is sort of the 'America' of the Pokémon world, while Galar is supposed to be British. Logically, I think they'd have some Pokémon from other regions, but it really makes it hard to choose with that many options. Plus, they could always have other Pokémon that aren't part of those specific regions, they just don't incorporate them into their main team.

PRE-FALL

Curt's team is as follows:

Krokorok: A Ground/Dark type Pokémon. Krokorok has exceptional night vision, and is known for being a little headstrong, traveling in small, close-knit groups.

I think Curt has had Krokorok as his partner for a while. He hatched it as a Sandile from an egg, and has been training it for years. They're perfectly in sync with each other, because they have almost identical personalities.

Possibile abilities include

Intimidate: A Pokémon with the ability Intimidate will lower opposing Pokémon's attack stats by one stage

Moxie: When a Pokémon with the ability Moxie causes another Pokémon to be knocked out, its attack stat will increase by one stage

Anger Point: When a Pokémon with the hidden ability Anger Point is hurt by an opposing critical hit, the Pokémon's attack stat will max out

I think Curt's Krokorok would have the Moxie ability, as well as a naive nature, which gives the Pokémon increased speed, but a decreased special defense.

Braviary: A Normal/Flying type Pokémon. Braviary are noble and proud, but can become fiercely aggressive in order to protect its friends and family. Braviary will keep fighting, even if injured.

I like to believe that everyone who works for the U.S. government or affiliated groups would receive a Braviary, or at least its pre-evolved form Rufflet. Curt got his Braviary when he jpined the American Secret Service, and they now wok like a well-oiled machine.

Possible abilities include:

Keen Eye: A Pokémon with the ability Keen Eye will not have its accuracy stat lowered by opposing Pokémon

Sheer Force: The ability Sheer Force raises the base power by approximately 30% of all damaging moves that have additional effects, but their additional effects are ignored

Defiant: Pokémon with the hidden ability Defiant will increase its own attack stat by two stages when any stat is lowered by an opponent

I think Curt's Braviary would have the Keen Eye ability, as well as the naughty nature, which gives it increased attack, but decreased special defense.

Herdier: A Normal type Pokémon, Herdier is a loyal Pokémon that will help its trainer with anything, but will not take orders from anyone who disrespects it. It takes a lot of grooming to keep Herdier in good condition

Curt's Herdier was a gift from his mom when he joined the agency. Ms. Mega wanted Curt to have a Pokémon that could look after him. Herdier loves Curt more than physically possible, but just like any pet, Herdier seems to love Curt's mom just a bit more.

Possible abilities include:

Intimidate: A Pokémon with the ability Intimidate will lower opposing Pokémon's attack stats by one stage

Sand Rush: A Pokémon with the ability Sand Rush will have its speed stat doubled during a sandstorm, and will take no damage from a sandstorm

Scrappy: A Pokémon with the hidden ability Scrappy enables the Pokémon to hit Ghost type Pokémon with Normal and Fighting type moves

Curt's Herdier has the Scrappy ability, as well as the bold nature, giving increased defense but decreased attack

Umbreon: A Dark type Pokémon, Umbreon a defensive Pokémon that evolves from high friendship. Umbreon is nocturnal, and uses poisonous sweat to deter atackers.

Curt's Umbreon is a Pokémon he helped raise with Owen. They each caught an Eevee on the same day, and would train and raise the two Pokémon together. The Eevee evolved on the same day, only Curt's evolved second, right after the sun had set.

Possible abilities include:

Synchronize: When a Pokémon with the Synchronize ability becomes burned, paralyzed or poisoned, the opponent with be inflicted with the same status conditions.

Inner Focus: A Pokémon with the hidden ability Inner Focus will be resistant to flinching.

Curt's Umbreon would have the hidden ability Inner Focus, and would have an impish nature, resulting in increased defense but decreased special attack

Owen's team is as follows:

Inteleon: A Water type Pokémon. Inteleon has pinpoint aim, and a high intelligence, and can camouflage and see infrared signatures. Inteleon is chivalrous, but is known for having a lazy streak.

Owen's first Pokémon was Sobble, the first evolutionary stage of Inteleon. Owen knew from a young age that he wanted to be a spy, and so he chose his first Pokémon for that specific aspiration. Inteleon has been with Owen through almost every major point in his life.

Possibile abilities include

Torrent: A Pokémon with the ability Torrent will get a 50% increase on a Water type move, provided the Pokémon has less than a third of its HP left

Sniper: A Pokémon with the hidden ability Sniper has a 50% increase in critical hit damage

I think Owen's Inteleon would have the Torrent ability, as well as a serious nature, which gives the Pokémon increased speed, but decreased speed. This cancels out and has no stat changes.

Corvisquire: A Flying type Pokémon, Corvisquire is known for very high intelligence, and its ability to correctly gauge the strength of an opponent

Owen didn't want a Corvisquire. He never really cared for bird Pokémon. But he made friends with one on a mission once, that ended up saving his life after he made a dumb mistake in his early days, and they've been together ever since.

Possible abilities include:

Keen Eye: A Pokémon with the ability Keen Eye will not have its accuracy stat lowered by opposing Pokémon

Unnerve: A Pokémon with the ability Unnerve is present, opposing Pokémon become too nervous to eat berries

Big Pecks: A Pokémon with the hidden ability Big Pecks prevents other Pokémon from lowering the user's defense stat

Owen's Corvisquire has the Keen Eye ability, as well as the Adamant nature, giving increased attack but decreased special attack

Yamper: An Electric type Pokémon, Yamper is drawn to fast moving objects, and gives off excess electricity when running. Keep treats on hand, because Yamper is very food-motivated

Yamper is a newer addition to Owen's team. He's raising a young Yamper with the intent of having a Boltund, the evolved form of Yamper. Yamper only mostly obeys Owen, and Owen jokes that it's like having two Curts to take care of

Possible abilities include:

Ball Fetch: A Pokémon with the ability Ball Fetch will retrieve Pokéballs for its trainer that failed to catch a wild Pokémon, so long as they aren't holding another item

Rattled: When a Pokémon with the hidden ability Rattled is hurt by a Bug, Dark or Ghost type move, its speed gets increased one stage

Owen's Yamper has the Rattled ability, as well as the hasty nature, giving increased speed but decreased defense

Espeon: A Psychic type Pokémon, Espeon can sense miniscule shifts in the air, allowing it to predict movement. Espeon is extremely loyal to trainers, and will activate psychic abilities in order to keep them safe.

Owen's Espeon is a Pokémon he helped raise with Curt. They each caught an Eevee on the same day, and would train and raise the two Pokémon together. The Eevee evolved on the same day, only Owen's evolved first, right before the sun had set.

Possible abilities include:

Synchronize: When a Pokémon with the Synchronize ability becomes burned, paralyzed or poisoned, the opponent with be inflicted with the same status conditions.

Magic Bounce: A Pokémon with the hidden ability Magic Bounce will be able to reflect certain status moves back at the attacker.

Owen's Espeon would have the ability Synchronize, and would have a sassy nature, resulting in increased special defense but decreased speed.

POST-FALL

4 years later, Curt's team is:

New/evolved Pokémon info

Krookodile: A Ground/Dark type Pokémon. Krookodile is a very violent Pokémon by nature. It will ruthlessly tear apart prey, and will spend all day hunting.

Curt's Krokorok evolves right before the events of One Step Ahead. Krookodile was also attatched to Owen, and seeing its trainer in distress was enough to trigger an evolution. Because Krookodile is a far more aggressive Pokémon by nature, there becomes a rift between Curt and Krookodile, because they used to be so alike, and now Curt has grieved and moved on, while Krookodile retains the agression. With time, they'll fall back into sync, but the reveal that Owen was alive affected everyone

Abilities and nature stay the same.

Magnemite: A Steel/Electric type Pokémon, Magnemite is a pokemon drawn to technology, and most other things that emmit electric fields.

After Owen's supposed death, Curt gives Umbreon to his mother to look after. Umbreon has a nice relationship with Ms. Mega, and Curt does stop by often to check up on Umbreon, but training Umbreon was just another painful reminder of what he lost. He did not abandon Umbreon, he just couldn't keep Umbreon on his team. Instead, when setting out as a spy after four years, Barb has Curt take one of the lab's Magnemite, to fill out his team, and to help with cool spy gadgets. Also for Barb's peace of mind. Curt cares for Magnemite, but not the way he cares for his other Pokémon.

Possible abilities include:

Magnet Pull: A Pokémon with the Magnet Pull ability prevents adjacent steel type Pokémon from switching out or fleeing

Sturdy: A Pokémon with the ability Sturdy is able to withstand one-hit knockout moves

Analytic: If a Pokémon with the hidden ability Analytic makes its move after all other Pokémon make their move, the power of its move is increased by 30%

Curt's Magnemite would have the ability Sturdy, and would have an Hardy nature, resulting in increased attack but also decreased attack. There would be no stat change.

4 years later, Owen's team is:

New/evolved Pokémon info

Corviknight: A Flying/Steel type Pokémon. Corviknight is among the strongest bird Pokémon, known for having territorial disputes. Corviknight is a Pokémon that is often feared by other Pokémon.

Owen didn't have his Pokémon with him when he fell. His disguise wouldn't work if he did. But he rarely keeps his Pokémon in their Pokéballs, so when Owen didn't come back in a timely manner, Corvisquire flew out on its own to locate Owen. Corvisquire found him under rubble and in the desperation and struggle to get Owen free, Corvisquire evolved into Corviknight, gaining the strength needed to save Owen.

Upon evolving, the ability Keen Eye becomes the ability Pressure. When another Pokémon uses a move targeting the Pokémon with this ability, it uses more energy for the opposing Pokémon.

Noivern: A Flying/Dragon type Pokémon, Noivern is known for its violent nature and its cruel tormenting of its prey. Noivern is capable of crushing stone with ultrasonic waves

Owen saw too much of Curt in Yamper, so he took Yamper off of his team, never getting to the point where Yamper evolves into Boltund. He still cares deeply for Yamper. In fact, he pampers Yamper when he's not on missions. But he can't be out in the field with anything reminding him of Curt. Noibat is not a Pokémon he caught himself. Chimera issues out Pokémon to all its agents who need one. Owen is on Noivern's good side, because he feeds and cares for Noivern (he's evil, not an asshole), but at the end of the day, Noivern and Owen don't belong to each other the way he and Yamper and other Pokémon do

Possible abilities include:

Frisk: A Pokémon with the ability Frisk is sent out, the Pokémon will detect any held items an opponent might be holding

Infiltrator: When a Pokémon with the ability Infiltrator attacks an opponent that has barriers or substitutes active, the move will affect them regardless

Telepathy: A Pokémon with the hidden ability Telepathy is undamaged by moves used by its allies

Owen's Noivern has the Infiltrator ability, as well as a naughty nature, giving increased attack but decreased special defense

Thievul: A Dark type Pokémon, Thievul is a skilled hunter, and will mark targets with an identifying scent to be able to track them

Thievul is another Pokémon given to Owen by Chimera. He gets along okay with Thievul, but has to be careful when not on missions, because Thievul is natural enemies with Boltund, so Yamper has a distrust of Thievul, and they will fight if provoked

Possible abilities include:

Run Away: A Pokémon with the ability Run Away will always be able to successfully flee a battle, no matter what trapping moves or abilities may be in effect

Unburden: A Pokémon with the ability Unburden will double its speed stat when a held item is used or lost in battle

Stakeout: When a Pokémon with the hidden ability Stakeout attacks an opposing pokemon that has been switched out, the attack power is doubled

Owen's Thievul has the Run Away ability, as well as the rash nature, giving increased special attack but decreased special defense

This is just the start of what I have swimming around in my head for an AU. I'd love to expand on it if there is interest because I am SO NORMAL about both Pokemon and SAF

#spies are forever #tcb spies are forever #tin can bros #spy another day #agent curt mega #owen carvour #curtwen #spies are forever pokemon au

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bronx-bomber87 · 10 months

Text

Happy Saturday lovely Fandom :) We’ve reached my favorite episode of the season. I explained in detail to that ask I received about my fav eps why I love it so much. Great follow up to the previous episode. So much good content in this one. Married moments galore, growth, all the goodies. The name on this one is apt. Makes me breakdown every time I watch it. Let's get going.

4x09 Breakdown

First off imma need more Lucy/Genny scenes in S6. Their banter and bonding makes me so happy. Idk what Tim was expecting with these two together again. Of course they were going to bond more and chat. Get off track while doing so. Genny trying to reminisce about the house. Asking Tim if he remembers their mom used to make them pose for pics by that window? Lucy jumps in because why wouldn’t she? Joining in saying her mom did the same thing. The smile on Genny's face. She clearly enjoys Lucy's company. Probably thinking why isn't Tim dating her?

Tim doesn’t look amused by this at all. Even huffing a little bit. They continue on like he isn’t there. Talking about wrist corsages they had to wear. Genny saying 'Why was that ever a thing?' Tim cuts off memory lane. Stating they’re just here to fix this place up and sell it. That’s it. Lucy therapy mode is activated by this comment of course. Stating they’re closing an important chapter in their lives. They need closure by doing things like this. Reminiscing and such.

Tim being so very over this turns on the saw. Trying to drown her out saying ‘What? LOL Such a little shit ha I love him so much though. (So does Lucy heh) Lucy screams 'You need closure!' again despite him trying to drown her out. He screams again 'What?! 'She is so flirty when calls him an idiot. Mixture of exasperated and flirty. Like he’s her idiot and I love it sfm. Also let’s note this is clearly Lucy’s day off. How is she spending it?

Renovating Tim’s childhood home and bonding with his sister some more. Not soulmate behavior at all… It’s crazy just like in S2 you forget he’s dating Rachel. It’s the same in S4 only their bond is even stronger now. Where is Ashley is all this? Not here... Their married vibes are insanely high in this moment.

Tim’s exasperated face when she calls him an idiot haha Epitome of Sunshine x Grumpy. All in front to Genny too. Like Grey I’m sure she also knew long before they did. If you needed a future depiction of their marriage this is it. Sister in-law and all in the mix. This is so domestic I cannot stand it.

As they continue to tear down the wall Lucy is telling them how much she wanted a sibling. She begged her parents for one. Instead they got her a turtle ha. Not really the same thing... Saying it was cute but a little smelly. Then Genny comes in with the hilarious sibling slam. 'Cute and smelly sums up Tim’s teenage years' LOL Saying she didn’t miss much at all. Tim returns the sass in full above. The cute family bonding getting me all in my feels. Lucy is so happy to be apart of this.

Written all over her face. Future sister-in law bonding as well it’s so great. Unfortunately while they’re tearing down the wall they find a gun. Tim goes from light-hearted and fun to serious at the drop of a hat. Genny asks how long that could’ve been in there? Tim isn’t sure. That it’s hard to say. He shows Lucy that the serial number has been filed off. Lucy says they need to run ballistics. Tim nods agreeing with her completely. They're so damn in-sync and just a well oiled machine with work stuff. Just comes together so seamlessly.

Genny panics a little. Says they don’t actually think it was used in a crime do they? Tim lets her know it’s THEIR job to find out. Not just him THEIR. I love it. Genny is upset they’re leaving. Wondering if anyone else can handle this? Tim promises they’ll be back as soon as they can. Genny scoffs and says she knew he’d find an excuse to leave. Tim tells her this is serious. They have to go.

Genny doesn’t fight him and tells him to just go. Lucy’s face when Tim exits the room. She’s torn between comforting Genny and rushing after Tim. Naturally she goes after Tim. He needs her more and is clearly so upset. She’s worried about him so he takes precedence. It’s like an instinctual pull to him in that gif above.

You can tell she wants to stay to help Genny but Tim needs her more. Before we delve any further. Let’s talk about seeing Tim in jeans during this. Phew lord. Tall drink of sexy in tight blue jeans. I am here for it. Break me off a piece. Those biceps in that t-shirt too. Trying to kill me good sir. This man can make the simplest outfits sexy af. How does he do it? It's not fair to be this attractive.

Once Lucy catches up to him she says Genny has a point. He could call someone else to handle this. That he still can. Tim gives her a good company line. Saying 'How a good Sergeant doesn’t create work for his officers. Even on his day off.' Lucy of course isn’t buying what he’s selling. Knows this man better than anyone else. Asks if 'It’s not at all about the emotions this house is stirring up?'

Tim not wanting to deal with his emotions says ‘It’s just a house…’ How you acted all of 4x08 would contradict that statement my love. *sigh* Oh my poor Tim. Lucy hit the nail on the head and he doesn’t want to face it let alone deal with it. Lucy doesn’t press him any further. She knows her boundaries with him. That doesn’t erase the massive worry on her face though. If she could hug him right now she would.

We rejoin them at that station. First off how can two people exude so much chemistry just walking next to each other? Tall/Smol gloriousness. The little to no space between them as they walk together. Personal space? Never heard of her. That word is foreign to them and it makes me giddy. How Tim is drawn to her as they move. Looking like he’s reading the file. When really he’s just magnetically drawn to her. He physically can’t help it at this point.

I can’t get over Tim being in street clothes in the station. Mmm. Not only that but being in jeans plus his badge showing? My god I’m a puddle. This man is my undoing and I welcome it. *Ahem* Their dialogue here is married af. It’s so god damn natural I cannot stand it. Lucy being on it with ballistics. Saying she got it already. Tim comments that was fast. Lucy stating above how she achieved said fast results.

Forever love that silent communication they do. He doesn’t even need to say thank you. That cute little smile does it for him in the second gif. It’s his thank you and she reads it loud and clear. Her buying cookies just to expedite this case? Tell me your ship is in love without telling me they’re in love. Gah this ep is doing things to me. It’s like when you see a cute puppy and are overcome with cute aggression. I’m overcome with amazing cute ship aggression LMAO

Lucy gives him the details she has from the report. Saying the ballistics match a 25 year old murder. Someone named Frank Ochoa. Tim freezes and says he lived down the street from them. He also mentions he was 14 when he was murdered. Lucy continues on and says the investigation resulted in a botched home invasion. Tim replies they can rule that out now that they found the gun in their wall.

Lucy asks Tim if he remembers anything from that night? Tim tells her he had football game. His mom took him and Genny. When they got back it was crawling with cops. That his dad hated Frank. Lucy tells him he had an alibi. Frank’s wife. This incites Tim’s anger even more. Saying he was having an affair with her. She was no alibi.

His mom didn’t know but he did. Ugh. Poor Tim having to live with that. To protect his mother’s feelings by living with it. You can see the hurt on his face. The anger welling up inside of him. So much so when Lucy tries to theorize with him he just says I don’t know. So overcome with emotions of his past. I wanna hug him this entire episode.

This next section we see protective/worried Lucy come out. Honestly she’s present most of this episode tbh. She finds Tim in the hallway headed towards interrogation. Asking what he’s doing? Tim lets her know Monica Ochoa is in interrogation. That he’s going to get to the bottom of this. Lucy stops him right away. Knowing he will go in there like a raging bull full of emotions. Tim shoots back she’s his father’s alibi.

She has the answer to whether it was her or his dad that killed Frank. He's so antsy to have answers. His anxiety coming off him in massive waves. Luckily Lucy is well versed in the ways of Tim Bradford. Knows exactly how to handle this. She agrees but says he can’t be the one to question her. That he will have an immediate bias towards her. Lucy does what she does best. Tells him what he needs to hear. Saying he can’t be the one to do this.

They need to do this the right way if they're gonna tackle this together. The best part is he agrees and hands the file over to her. No fight in him at all. My damn heart. I'm bursting. The immense amount of growth in this man. Seeing her reasoning right away, handing it over knowing she’s right and trusts her to interrogate Monica. The levels of growth for them and Tim as a person are off the charts. I adore him pointing to her then handing the file right over. Not giving it a second thought that she is right. Not only is he trusting her to do this correctly. It’s a family matter he’s letting her handle.

I cannot emphasize enough how huge this is. How far we’ve come from where we started. It’s moments like this where we truly get to reap the reward of all the build up. How Tim ‘I don’t talk about my personal life’ Bradford is handing over the most personal thing he could to Lucy. Saying you’re right, I trust you, let’s do this. To have this guarded man hand the reins over to Lucy is colossal. That wall of his with her is in damn near ruin at this point.

Tim watches from observation as Lucy handles questioning. Monica is defensive right off the bat. Dodging all of Lucy’s questions. Lucy gets her back on track though. Has her recite what happened that night. She says she was over with Tom (Tim's father) doing her taxes. He was a CPA so she went to him for help. When she got home their house has been broken into. Found Frank’s body in kitchen. Lucy tries to poke at the affair a bit more. Trying to get her to admit to it.

Asking if she was with the Bradford’s a lot? If so we're the kids there? Did Tom leave the house at any point while helping her? Monica gets even more defensive and gets up to leave. Lucy isn’t able to keep her in the room much longer. Suspicious af behavior. Tim can’t stand her up and leaving. He confronts her in the hallway. It goes about as well as you’d expect. If you think she was defensive with Lucy amplify that by ten with Tim.

When she takes off Tim says she’s covering for him. Lucy says maybe…but they can’t prove that. For first time he’s not looking at something with cop eyes. Thankfully he has Lucy who is. He’s so determined to see this the way he wants to. To nail his dad for something. If he does it’ll be cathartic for him. Almost likes forcing his father to atone for all his sins with this one crime.

Tim goes to see his father and it’s hard to watch. Tim has tears in his eyes from the moment he steps into that room. All his pent up emotions barreling out of him. He tries to keep himself in check and it gets the best of him. You can hear the hurt in his voice as he speaks to his father. I know that hurt well. His father joking the nurses love him. But not enough to give him a shot of patron. Tim is so irritated with him. Annoyed he always finds people to take care of his even when he doesn’t deserve it. Tom asks him if has something on his mind?

Tim brings up finding the gun, Frank Ochoa, his wife. His father denies knowing her cause he’s awful. Tim letting him know he knew about the affair. He tries to deny it further and Tim lets him know he caught them when he was 13. His father finally giving in with an 'Oh crap.' Then Tim says something that breaks my heart. ‘For some reason I still don’t understand. I lied for you. Lied to mom.’ You can see how that ate at him to do so. He was too young for such a burden.

I think the reason he doesn't understand is he wanted his dad to be proud of him. It sounds messed up but I get it. Wanted him to praise him for something. Anything. Give him an 'Atta Boy.' I so understand that. You’d think the relationship I have my own parents their opinion would mean nothing. Now it does less so than it used to. But there’s still something deep down inside me wants them to be proud of me. Praise me. Say I did a good job. Instead of being disappointed.

It’s some crazy DNA thing with your parents. Where even if you’re on bad terms there is still part of you that wants that acceptance. When really it should be the other way around. Tim wanted his dad to recognize what he had done for him. Even now he wanted that and all he got was emotional abuse as his reply. Belittling him and calling him ‘Poor little Tim-Tim’ I bet you Tim was a very emotional sensitive child like me and he was shut down constantly like I was. Hence that nickname. Ugh. I hate his father so much. Tim asks why he did it? Ruining one family wasn’t enough for him?

His father gets out of bed. Tim tells him to get back in. His father being defiant knowing Tim won’t lay a hand. Says ‘Make me.’ Tim can’t even look him in the eye and his father tacks on ‘That’s what I thought.’ This hurts my soul watch. Feels like a glimpse into how things were for him growing up. Anytime Tim stood up for himself or Genny. This was probably the reaction he got. Him goading him into a reaction. Then when he didn’t get it belittling Tim was the next step for not doing so. *sigh* Seeing the emotional abuse in action is hard to swallow. I hate seeing Tim shrink like he does in his father's presence.

That strong confident man we’re all used to reduced in an instant due to his father. Breaks my damn heart. His father confesses to killing Frank. Goes after Tim some more and says screw him. Calling Tim mockingly a ‘big man’ for dragging him away from his death bed. Tim tells him ' This isn't over..' tears threatening to spill from his beautiful eyes. I wanna hug him so much. His father tells him to get the hell out. *heart clutch* When a parent cuts you down like that and you’re too stunned to really reply. It's a helpless feeling. The rage I feel is a culmination for him and what I’ve dealt with myself.

We return to Tim at the station. Ready to write his father up. Man on a mission really. Lucy comes over to talk to him. Tim word vomits all over her. Coming out faster than Lucy can get a word in. Asking her a favor and getting the DA contacted for him. Lucy finally is able to tell him to stop. Let’s him know she brought Monica back in while he was away. Tim is confused and asks why?

One of the two things I adore about this scene is Lucy’s initiative here. She knew from very jump how emotionally compromised he was. He only saw one narrative and ran with it. Blinding him to any other possibilities this case had. Lucy was the one with cop eyes for him. Brought Monica back in knowing she could get more out of her solo.

The second thing I love is once again is the personal growth from Tim. He doesn’t question her doing this. Isn't mad about it. Hears her logic and her telling him like it is like she does best. Letting him know his judgement was clouded. That Tim couldn't see past the version he wanted. Tim doesn’t disagree. At all. She took charge of this case and he’s not upset in the least. Just curious and asks her what she’s found? I’m just so proud of him. It’s not easy to work on yourself and he has so very much. It shows so much in moments like this.

We cut to Tim back at his dad’s room. There is a finality in the air as he walks in. Gives his dad that shot of patron he has been wanting. Like Tim is giving him little something to gain passage into talking him. To say how he’s really feeling. Calls his dad out on what really happened. What he learned from Lucy. Frank was beating Monica. She lost it one night and killed him. Ran to Tom cause she was terrified. He helped her stage the house.

His father goes off saying she deserves a medal for what she did. That he was an abusive brutal bastard. This where Eric should win all the awards. He is so masterful in his inflections, The emotion in his voice, The tears in his eyes, His facial expressions, Everything. How he calls his father out for being the exact same thing. His reaction is the same as my mother is anytime I bring up something from our childhood. Defensive saying they’re nothing like what you’re bringing up.

Being defensive because they know it’s true. Or so deluded they truly think they did no wrong. Not sure which one is worse tbh. Tom trying to take credit for who Tim became. That he turned him into a man. His reply is so so good. The deep emotion’s in his voice as he tells him off. Saying he became who he was despite him. Yeah you did babe. As did I with my parents. His final words an amazing slap to his father's face. ‘Goodbye dad. I hope it hurts.' I hope it does too.

I would like to say first I adore her coming to hospice with him. Knowing he would need it after confronting his father. Knowing him so well. He would never ask for her support directly. Lucy recognizing this and coming for this reason. He needed her and she knew it. She watches him emerge from his father’s room so distraught. Immediately asking if he’s ok? Lucy looks like she wants to cry the minute she see's him. He looks so broken and sad. Melissa and Eric are just incredible in this scene. That look of intense worry on her face. my heart.

Tim telling her right away he sure as hell isn’t. Divulging his feelings and showing how deeply hurt he is. That his father protected Monica. The way his voice breaks as he tells Lucy this. How his father never did anything to protect him and Genny. All he ever did was tear them down. Physically hurt Tim on top of emotionally damaging him for life. The pre-tears in his eyes when he says but he didn’t think twice for his mistress. Broke half a dozen laws for her...

His reply a mixture of incredible anger and deep hurt. Lucy updates him saying Monica is being processed now. That they probably won’t go after his father. Since he’s on his death bed. Tim is so drained and resigned at this point. Says 'It doesn’t matter. He will get judged soon enough..' The worry is still coming off Lucy in waves. She knows he’s holding something else back. Something that is still hurting him. She is just waiting for him to share it.

Lucy is pleading him with her eyes above to share it. It comes shortly after this. The line that circles us back to the one Lucy said toward the end of 4x08. The 'Tim Test' line she let slip. One that has been eating at him ever since. A thought that no doubt was destroying his mental health further. Adding to his overall anxiety about the connection between him and his father. Worried Lucy viewed him the same way as his father. That she associated his tests with training to the abuse his father put him through. It’s heartbreaking to watch Tim say this to her. Almost begging Lucy to relieve him of his hurt. His deep seated anxiety about this.

To alleviate him of the bottomless worry that she’s made an association between how he was abused and she was trained. NEEDING her to let him know they’re not the same. Because if they are it’ll destroy him. To think he hurt one of his favorite people because he was just like his father. It's not a thought he can handle. The fear in his eyes thinking he had done to her what his father had done to him is breaking him. Tim is unraveling at this point.

It’s the way his body language is defense and guarded as he speaks his lines above. Like he’s bracing for impact. Waiting for her to give into his deepest fears. He’s expecting the absolute worst due to his damaged past. Lucy with all the empathy in the world splayed across her face says ‘I know. You’re nothing like him…I...’ Too stunned to finish her sentence. She's hurting right along with him. Because she is seeing the load he's been carrying and wanting to relieve him of it so badly. She truly believe's he isn't like him. Needs him to know this.

I mean back in 1x04 when she defended Tim to Nolan. When she was at the height of her tests. She said he was 'Calculating not cruel.' Lucy not once believed that of him. Always saw his good heart from day one. You can see Tim take a step back from her in the first gif. His body innately trying to protect himself. He looks so broken I wanna cry. He so desperately wants her to assuage him of his fears.

Yet when she does he can’t believe the grace she is extending to him in this moment. The way he steps back instinctively. Like he isn’t sure he can trust this. That last bit of his wall holding him back in this moment. His gut instinct to retreat from having any emotions. Especially this openly with someone. Lucy can’t stand him pushing away when he’s hurting this badly. Doesn’t waste anymore time and encases him in her arms.

Rushing to not only reassure him but to comfort Tim on a physical level. Giving him the solace he didn’t even know he needed. She does this because if she doesn't she'll start crying herself. She has never seen him this vulnerable. This open and its making her emotional too. Lucy is wanting to absorb his pain, his fears and most of all put him back together. She does so with this beautiful embrace. His beautiful sunshine human wrapping him up in her arms is just what he needed. Pushing away his dark clouds with this hug. He is stiff at first with the initial contact then gives in fully below.

Hands down my favorite hug of all time because of the emotions that go with it. She then reassures him once again. 'You're nothing like him.' We watch Tim melt into her arms fully giving into the comfort she is providing. That wall she’s been chipping at since S1. That’s gone now. Utter rubble after this moment. Lucy validating him is everything his soul truly needed. His person confirming he was a good man. Tim’s body finally surrendering and sinking into her embrace once she spoke those words again. Reaffirming it for him.

Her opinion mattering the most. This moment screaming that in every way. Hearing this from her was EVERYTHING to him. Absolutely everything. I remember when I first watched this moment I was in awe of it. How perfectly he fit into the crook of her neck. Once again they fit together like a perfect puzzle piece. I also knew we were headed towards our endgame. This was our pre-getting together season. The emotional depth out of this episode alone I felt it. The hug solidified that gut feeling.

One of the many reasons why this is my favorite episode of the season. These are the moments I love so much because they’re developing emotionally, as characters and their relationship as a whole. It’s why they work so well in S5 when it finally happens. The bond, the growth, the things they went through together before they got together. It’s what created this amazing base they’re standing on now in s5 and what we will get in s6. I love their journey so much. Wouldn’t trade a single thing in this slow burn. Not one.

Tim shows back up at the house. Looks like Genny has done a lot do work solo. You see the guilt splayed all over his face. He apologizes for not helping out more. Genny tells him she’s used to cleaning up messes by herself…Tim apologizes again for that and says he knows she is. He wants to be a better big brother. Genny compliments him says he’s not that bad. When he’s around....

Tim tells her that’s all gonna change. He’s going to visit for every holiday and call twice a week, and he’ll handle fixing and selling this house. That she should get home to her family. Genny replies sweetly and says he’s her family too. I do love their scenes a lot. I need more of this in s6.

She has them make a deal. That they’ll do this together and be done with it. All of it. I love this so much. There is a lot I don’t love about my childhood. But the one thing I’m eternally grateful for is the relationship with my baby sister. You can’t beat that bond. I am so happy for Tim to have it. Her asking about the gun was too funny LOL I imagine he would tell her even if it’s awkward af.

Side Notes-Non Chenford

Gonna be honest didn’t care about anything else in this ep. Other than Tamara owning Smitty’s ass repeatedly in this ep haha

Thank you forever and always to those who like, comment and reblog these reviews. Makes my heart happy. Shall see you all Monday with 4x10 :)

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