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angelwings-crossbowstrings · 1 year ago

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I’m Your Fatal Sin

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader

Setting: Prison Era

Warnings: Typical TWD violence, descriptions of injuries

Summary: Daryl doesn’t like you going outside the safety of the prison.

Prompt: “I will leave now, or I’m going to say things I will regret later.” (Had to write in Daryl speak but it’s the same thing!)

A/N: Second request by @alldevilsarehere90. I took so long writing the first one that I did the second they asked for…and took equally as long. Apparently, “drabble” is not a word I’m familiar with and I should just call these novels. The prompt is waaaay up in the beginning but I just kept going. Sorry again, my friend! Also, I have not had this checked for errors and my brain is too tired tonight. I’ll go over and fix stuff tomorrow…. Because no beta, we die like men.

*gif is not mine

You watched him pace the length of the room, fingertips rubbing roughly at his temples as if he was fighting off a headache. That would be you, Y/N. You thought, biting back a chuckle. Your group had arrived back at the prison, battered, bruised, and bleeding but hearts still beating. You counted that as a win.

Daryl was not so easily mollified.

He had stayed behind on this run, having only returned from hunting just as your group was heading out. He wasn’t happy that you were going out without him. It was all so amusing to you, personally. When the two of you had first met back at the quarry, you had taken one of the squirrels he had brought back, held it by the tail, and smacked him upside the head with it after he had said something particularly offensive. It was even funnier that you couldn’t remember now what it was that he had said. Regardless, he had retaliated by soaking you in the blood he drained from the rodent he had been skinning. Even in his anger back then, you had caught the look in his eye.

You weren’t afraid of him.

Your friendship started then and there. You spent more time in the Dixon camp than you had with your own boyfriend. That had not gone over well. Mark was the younger brother of one of Ed Peletier’s friends. The moment Daryl had found you doing laundry and saw the shiner you sported, you were given your own small tent next to his and Merle’s. When the perpetrator had come looking for you, the Dixon brothers had formed an immovable wall in front of you.

You still weren’t sure if Mark had been killed by a walker like Merle had said.

Regardless, you were free. Daryl took you under his wing, teaching you to hunt and defend yourself. When he had finally handed you his beloved crossbow, you had laughed and asked if you needed to buy her dinner before squeezing her trigger.

“Stop.” Daryl had huffed, amusement gleaming in those blue eyes.

You had been out with the younger brother when Merle had been left abandoned. While you were angry, you knew how belligerent the man could be, so Rick’s explanation hadn’t seemed too far fetched to you. You went with the group to try and bring him home. You had taken the brunt of Daryl’s verbal aggression with grace, knowing he was in pain. He would never hurt you. That much you knew. When emotions were running high, Daryl floundered and would try to escape them by any means necessary. Even if that meant bucking against someone he cared about.

Still, you stayed.

Months had passed. You didn’t even try to keep up with that anymore, focusing more on the change of the seasons. It felt less like losing something if you only changed your perspective. The group became a family. You had lost the farm and wandered throughout the winter before finding the prison that was your home now.

You and Daryl had remained steadfast, but he continued to open up, bit by bit. First with Carol, then with Rick. Him coming out of his shell made you happy, watching him become more and more comfortable with the others. You’d be lying, though, if you said you didn’t worry about being replaced.

Then, after choosing the cells you all would call your rooms, you came back from your first shower to find the mattress missing from the one you had selected. Daryl was sitting on the top step that led down to the lower level, waiting for you.

“Did you take my mattress, Dixon?”

“Yep.” So nonchalant, like you had just asked if the sky was blue.

“You gonna tell me why?” You pressed, kicking his hip gently with the toe of your boot.

“Ya stay where I can keep a eye on ya.” He shrugged, continuing to fiddle with his crossbow.

“What if I wanted my own space, huh?” You sat next to him and bumped your shoulder into his.

“Cell ain’t goin’ nowhere. S’there if ya need it.”

You never seemed to need it, perfectly content on sharing his perch with him. You had brought things back from runs; books, pictures, and little what-nots that now decorated the area. He never complained beyond the occasional scoff or eyeroll.

And time marched on. Your role in the group was just as vital as anyone else now. You took watches, went on runs, and helped clear the fence. You lost sleep, gave up your portions of the rations to make sure everyone else stayed fed, and you sustained injuries. You weren’t afraid to get your hands dirty for the good of your family.

Which is exactly why you were now perched on one of the tables in the cafeteria, watching Daryl pace a hole into the concrete floor.

“No one died, Dixon.” You leaned back with your palms pressed against the table, collected demeanor the polar opposite of his pulsing anxiety.

“Ya coulda, though, Y/N!” The man snapped, his longer hair shifting to cover his face when he spun to look at you.

“Calm down before you have a stroke.” You mused with a smile.

“Can ya be serious for five fuckin’ seconds?”

You could have sworn you saw smoke boiling out of his ears. Damn, he was mad. “I am.” You sat up straight with your best attempt at stoicism. “Stress can absolutely trigger a stroke and—” You had started laughing while he stomped over to you and grabbed your shoulders.

“Stop, goddamnit!”

“Okay, okay.” You patted his forearm and willed yourself to choke back the amusement. “We’re all fine, Daryl.” Lips pressed into a thin line, he gave you a nod, one that continued even as he released your left shoulder to roughly flick the bandage on your thigh that concealed a deep cut Hershel had earlier stitched. You were taken aback, eyes widening at the tendrils of pain that snaked out from the tender wound. “Ow.” You deadpanned.

“Coulda been a lot worse, Y/N.” He seemed calmer now but his gaze was still intense, shoulders high and nostrils flaring.

“I know that!” You finally snapped back, twisting around until he let you go altogether and stepped out of your space. “Christ, Daryl, I could die just going to piss! I know how dangerous the things we have to do are!” You hated arguing with him but sometimes, brandishing your own anger was the only way to get through to him. He watched you, obviously chewing on the inside of his cheek before he brought his thumb up to inflict the same abuse.

“Nah, not you. Not anymore.” He shook his head and started to walk away.

“What the—” Pain radiated through your leg when you hastily hopped down a little too roughly in your attempt to keep up with him. “What’s that supposed to mean? Daryl? Daryl!” When he made it clear he had no intention of stopping, you had to sprint to cut him off at the door, pressing your palms against his chest to force him to a halt. “Where are you going? What did you mean?”

“M’tellin’ Rick ya ain’t goin’ out there no more.”

Your eyebrows shot up, mouth falling open. “Excuse me?”

“Ya heard me, Y/N.” He made to step around you but you moved with him. “Go get offa that leg.” He ordered in an attempt to persuade you into relenting. He knew better.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Who the hell are you to say where I can and can’t go?” You seethed. Now it was you who was fuming and pacing, though it wasn’t as intimidating with your profound limp. Daryl crossed his arms and squared his shoulders. You suddenly wanted to punch him square in the nose.

“Ya ain’t got no business out there. Ya can do plenty here to help.”

“Says the man that goes off hunting alone every other day!” You hissed. Your fists were clenched at your sides.

“That’s diff’rent.”

“Oh, please, enlighten me. This I’ve just got to hear.” You laughed emptily and mimicked his stance.

“Ya just ain’t goin’ and that’s that.” When you moved to cut him off again, he was ready. His arm caught you at the chest and kept you from crossing in front of him.

“Goddamnit, Daryl! This isn’t your decision!” You yelled, trailing after him once again. You grabbed his wrist but he shook you off. “I want to help!”

“Ya can help here!” He shot back without looking at you.

“Would you just stop?!”

“Nah.”

“Why the fuck do you even care?!”

That stopped him in his tracks, nearly making you crash into his back. His fists were clenching and unclenching at his sides, his posture radiating with tension. He turned his head to the side and focused on something, anything but you, speaking to you over his shoulder. Somehow, this made you more nervous than his livid pacing.

“Ya even hafta ask?” You didn’t respond, utterly confused. The archer gave you more time than necessary but when you remained silent, he shook his head and changed course, heading outdoors instead of to the cell blocks. “Do whatever ya want.”

Your anger dissipated. “Daryl, wait. Where are you going?”

“M’leavin’ now or I’ma say things I’ll regret later.”

You called his name again but the only reply was the slam of the heavy metal door.

Your search for him didn’t last long. You knew better than anyone that there was no finding Daryl when he didn’t want to be found. In his absence, you did the only thing you could do: sulk.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” Carol queried, adjusting the basket of laundry on her hip after she stopped by the picnic table you had been perched at for the last 3 hours. Your only response was a heavy sigh. “Staring at the woods won’t make him come back any faster.” Your head shot up to reveal her knowing smile. Aside from you, Carol was the only other person to even relatively understand the younger Dixon. “What’d you argue about?” The silver-haired woman deposited the laundry on the table and took a seat across from you.

“He doesn’t want me to go on runs anymore.” A quiet reply while you toyed with some twine you had been using to hang up things around your space inside.

“And that bothers you?”

“Of course it does!” You snapped before quickly muttering an apology, though Carol didn’t seem affected. “It feels like he doesn’t trust me.”

“You know that’s bullshit.” Your mouth dropped open in disbelief. To your recollection, you had never before heard the woman utter even a syllable of a curse. She, of course, only offered a cheeky grin. “What? You think I can hang around you two and not pick up something?”

“Touché.” You nodded.

“Listen, Y/N,” she started and took your hand, “Daryl cares about you, more than he lets on.” She wouldn’t mention all the times he had come to her with questions. How he would mumble and blush when trying to figure something out to make you happy. How he would actively look for at least one thing to bring back for you from a run. “I think you should try to see this from his perspective.” Just like she had told him to see it from yours. “I think then you may be able to compromise, yeah?”

You nodded with a small smile. “Yeah. Yeah, I’ll think it over. Thanks, Carol.”

“Good.” The woman stood and grabbed up the basket. “Besides, you’re both insufferable when you’re fighting.” You reached out to give her a playful shove as she walked by and then patted the hand she laid briefly on your shoulder.

She was right. You didn’t want to keep fighting with Daryl. It made you both (and apparently everyone else) miserable. You’d have to come up with something in the middle.

The sky had faded to a pale lavender with the orange hue of the setting sun peeking over the trees. It was getting late and Daryl hadn’t returned. Your fingertips were sore from drumming on the table. Just as you stood with the intent to grab a weapon and go after him, a silhouette emerged from the treeline. There was a distinct outline of a crossbow on their back. The relief was immense and had you sinking back down onto the bench with your hand clutching the front of your shirt.

Your eyes stayed trained on him as he made his way past the walkers outside and entered the gate that was promptly closed behind him. From a distance, he appeared fine albeit a little dirty. He walked slowly with his head down, but he had been out all day, so you hoped that was nothing more than fatigue. He made it a little closer than you thought he would before he raised his head and his gaze went straight to you.

“Hey.” You offered, standing slowly. He gave you a nod and you thought he may walk on by, but he stopped just shy of the table. “You okay?” Another nod, his eyes seemingly studying your boots. “Look, Daryl—”

“I was wrong.” It came out so quickly that you had to think about it for a moment before you made sense of what he said. “Earlier. Was wrong. Ain’t got no right to tell ya what to do.”

This time, it was you who nodded. “I know why though.” He looked up, blue eyes peering from behind his hair.

“Ya do?”

“Yeah. You want to keep me safe. You care about me.” You smiled, small but genuine. A strange look crossed his face but was gone a moment later. Was that disappointment?

“Right.” He had started to chew on his thumbnail.

Licking your lips nervously, you continued. “I’ll do no more than two runs a week. And only when you’re going too.” You were absolutely certain you caught a ghost of a smile.

“Fair ‘nough.” He was shifting from foot to foot now, thumb still pressed against his lips. You had been so focused on the problem at hand that you hadn’t noticed the anxiety radiating from him in waves. Something was off. This had been too easy.

“Daryl, are you sure you’re okay?”

“Mhm, just—just tired.” His eyes said as much. You placed your hand on his bicep and ushered him along toward the door.

“Let’s get something to eat. I’m starving!” Had your focus not been ahead, you would have seen the way he only smiled once he looked down at you.

“Got some formula for Lil Asskicker.” Daryl rounded the end of the aisle you were knelt in, displaying the four cans in his pack before closing it up and placing it on his shoulder.

“That’ll last her about 3 days.” You quirked, causing Daryl to snort behind you. “She’s growing like a little weed.” There wasn’t much left in the way of over the counter medications but you had scored some infants Tylenol and gas relief drops, as well as medication for the adults. “The food was pretty picked through. I got a couple of cans of fruit, though!” You placed three more bottles of tylenol in your bag and stood, your knees protesting the movement.

“Y’ready then?” Daryl turned to head to the front of the old store. Glenn and Maggie were set to meet the two of you in the parking lot.

“All set!” You confirmed, adjusting the backpack straps on your shoulders. You jogged to catch up with the archer, bumping into his side while pulling your knife from its sheath. Daryl smirked and ruffled your hair before gently shoving you away. “Pretty good haul, I think. Maybe we could stop by that gas—”

“Sshh.” The bowman had gone rigid, his hand just in front of your mouth. “Ya hear that?” It was faint at first but the closer the two of you moved towards the front of the store, the louder the thumping and moaning became.

“That sounds like an awful lot of walkers, Daryl.” You rounded the broken down checkout lanes to bring the doors into view and felt your stomach drop. The light that should have been filtering through the dusty glass doors was completely snuffed out by the multitude of bodies shuffling past. A glance at the archer found him tense and mirroring your expression. “Glenn and Maggie—” You whispered urgently.

“They’ll wait ‘em out. Ain’t their first rodeo.” He had lowered his crossbow to his side. “Ours neither. Get comfy, girl. Might be here a bit.” He hopped up to sit on one of the conveyors while you walked through one of the other lanes to look at some of the old magazines. From the corner of your eye, you saw a small piece of bright orange peeking out from under the checkout shelf.

“Oh my god!” You shrieked in an enthused whisper.

“What?” Daryl was on his feet, crossbow leveled with his eyes. “What’s wrong?”

You were already on your knees to retrieve the object of your excitement. “Reese’s cups!” You sprang up to your feet, waving the small package around triumphantly.

The archer let the crossbow fall to his side, his face hidden behind his palm. “You’re ridiculous.”

“Big word, Dixon. I’m proud.” You bumped him deliberately with your hip as you walked by, hopping up where he had just been perched. The man leaned his weapon against the shelf where the cash register was positioned and sat beside you. You didn’t ask if he wanted the second treat, just handing it over habitually. You always shared with him. He accepted it with a smirk you didn’t see since you were already taking the first bite of the stale candy. “Buttery baby Jesus.” You moaned, eyes rolling back.

Daryl barked a laugh, almost dropping the Reese’s. “M’not sure I wanna know why baby Jesus is buttery.” He was shaking his head when he caught your bewildered expression. “What?” He questioned around the first bite.

“They told me it couldn’t happen. That it was impossible.” You whispered, eyes wide. The look on his face said he was waiting for you to continue. “You… you laughed.”

His expression deadpanned. “Shtop.” He mumbled around the chocolate and peanut butter.

“I’m serious, Dixon. We were all wondering when we would stumble across the reanimated remains of your sense of humor.”

He swallowed and bumped you with his shoulder. “I hate ya.”

“I love you too.” Your lips pressed against his cheek and pulled away just as quickly. The man went rigid, eyes straight forward. You didn’t seem to notice, wandering around the front.

His blue eyes began to follow your movements, the tight feeling in his chest overpowering the butterflies fluttering madly in his stomach. His face was burning all the way to the tips of his ears. No longer hungry, he delicately wrapped the remaining Reese’s cup in its wrapper and put it in his bag to give to you later.

You had knelt down to look through a basket labeled ‘return to stock.’ “Score! Batteries!” You exclaimed, mostly to yourself, and quickly shoved the different sizes into your pack. Behind you, the archer cleared his throat.

“Think they’re gone.” He was motioning toward the door when you turned to acknowledge him.

You twisted to the other side to find nothing but dull light creeping through the glass. “Nice! You ready?”

“Uh—yeah. Yeah, let’s go.”

You both shouldered your packs and grabbed your weapons, moving almost silently through the door. Glenn and Maggie had undoubtedly hunkered down as well, so it was anyone’s guess who would arrive first at the meeting spot. Daryl followed behind you, walking backwards to ensure the area you couldn’t see stayed clear.

“I think we’re good. It’s this way. Maybe Glenn and—” You rounded the corner, voice cut off into surprised shriek as two walkers tumbled into you. The back of your head met the concrete with a sickening crack and black spots danced across your vision. There was a loud bang to your left that you couldn’t place. Your body moved almost on autopilot, fumbling for the weapon you had dropped while you held one walker back with your forearm and kicked back the other with your free leg. You could hear Daryl screaming your name above the blood rushing in your ears. “D-Daryl!” You managed around the bile creeping up your throat. What seemed like several minutes later, the weight above you vanished and your gun was thrust into your hands.

“C’mon, girl! Up we go!”

Daryl’s hands were on you, pulling you up haphazardly by your arm. His voice sounded muffled but strained, like he was shouting under water. The world tilted and spun, and you felt an arm tighten around your back that you hadn’t realized was even there. You blinked hard, willing your surroundings to come into focus, but Daryl’s jarring movements were aggravating the already present nausea. Before you could warn him, you listed to your right and retched, the bile burning the back of your throat.

“Shit!”

His voice was a little clearer now, but you must have thrown him off balance. You tumbled down, only barely catching yourself on your palms before you would have smashed face first into the puddle of sick on the asphalt. Daryl crashed into your back a second later but quickly averted his weight so he landed beside you. A string of curses left his mouth as he pushed himself up, your eyes trying to follow him but stopping short on the smear of crimson where he had fallen.

“Daryl, are—are you bleeding?” Am I bleeding? You were being hauled to your feet again, the motion almost too much. Your vision grayed at the edges and you felt a strange tingling in your limbs. Don’t pass out. Don’t pass out.

“Over here! Hurry!”

Glenn. You had never been so relieved to hear his voice. It was short lived as you felt yourself fading. Your body was shifted again and now the world was upside down, a strong grip pressing into your ribs and the side of your knees. The last thing you saw was the herd of walkers closing in before it all went dark.

You awoke with a start, sitting up halfway before the pounding in your head made its presence known and you fell back with a grunt.

“Easy.”

Daryl. Thank god. You risked opening your eyes, finding him to be looking down at you from straight above. Scenery was flying by just beside his head. You were in the car, your head pillowed on Daryl’s lap. “Glenn? Maggie?” You asked quietly. You didn’t think you were physically capable of talking any louder.

“We’re here, Y/N.” Maggie’s voice came from the front seat. You felt her gentle touch in your arm and you immediately relaxed. You had all made it.

“What happened?” You asked, trying to keep your eyes focused on the archer when they wanted nothing more than to close and let you be dragged back into oblivion.

“Other half’a the herd came down on us. Ya cracked your melon when two’a ‘em took ya down.”

Worry and fatigue laced his voice but as you studied him, you could see the clear indicators of pain. Daryl always hid it well but you knew him better than anyone.

“You hurt?”

He shifted in the seat slightly and winced. “Ya must’a squeezed the trigger when ya went down. Shot me.”

Your eyes blew wide and you were instantly moving, trying to sit up. Your body seemed to disagree with that plan of action. “Where are you hit? How bad is it? Damn it!”

“Whoa! Hold up!” He pulled you back down, calloused finger smoothing the hair away from your face. “M’alright. Got the back’a my leg. Hershel’ll take care’a it.” You stared at him with wide, exhausted eyes. Were you actually lying on his wounded leg?

“I shot you?” You could feel the tears collecting on your lashes, guilt eating away at your insides, colliding with the nausea so hard that it made your vision swim. “I’m so sorry.” Your fingertips found his jaw, barely brushing the prickly hair there before your arm became too heavy to hold up.

“Ya didn’t do it on purpose, Y/N.”

“I would…never…” You suddenly felt exhaustion pulling you under, Daryl’s pleas for you to stay awake fading into white noise as blackness swallowed you up once again.

It had been three days since the run. Two had seen you lying in bed with Hershel doing periodic checks to ensure that the concussion wasn’t something more serious. Daryl had been there too. He would only leave when threatened by Carol, forced to go rest himself. He never stayed gone long. Rick had finally dragged an extra mattress in and placed it in the corner. The archer finally allowed himself to fall asleep and that’s how you found him when you had awoken near the end of day two. Hershel arrived to check your vitals and found you propped up on your elbows, watching Daryl sleep.

“How long has he been there?” You asked quietly. The old man smiled and released your wrist, satisfied with your pulse.

“It’d be easier to tell you when he wasn’t in here.” He mused while shaking two pills from a bottle. The sound didn’t disturb the bowman in the slightest, a testament to his exhaustion. “Take these.”

You trusted the old veterinarian and took the offered medication, just assuming it was for pain. Your eyes never left Daryl. “His leg— did it—will he—”

Hershel patted your own leg and waited for you to finally look at him. He shone a small light in your eyes and smiled again. “He’ll be fine. And so will you. You both just need to rest.”

You nodded and laid your head back on the pillow, turning on your side so you could keep Daryl in your sights. It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep. You didn’t hear Hershel leave.

Now, you were perched in the tower. It was the only thing Rick would allow you to do after Hershel released you. The sun had long ago set and the prison was dark and silent, save for the moans of the walkers shuffling around outside the fences. You had learned to tune them out when you were out there, allowing yourself to enjoy the fresh air and the quiet peace the night offered.

“Hey.”

You jerked around with a start, vision swimming only slightly as Daryl came into focus just beside the door leading to the ladder. He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand and chewed on the opposite thumbnail.

“Hi.” You smiled at him but it faded as he limped toward where you sat, hissing as he took a seat next to you. “Still hurts?”

“I’ll live.” He was looking out over the field and into the trees for a moment before turning to you. You avoided his gaze, and you knew he knew. “Ya alright?” You looked back at him and he tapped his finger against his forehead.

“Oh. Yeah. Yeah, I’m feeling much better.” A smile graced your lips once again, not quite reaching your eyes. Daryl nodded, his thumb to his mouth again. “You were right, you know.” His brow creased in confusion but you looked away, finding the treeline before continuing. “I shouldn’t be going out there anymore.”

The archer shook his head and moved his hand back to his lap. “Nah, Y/N. What happened was—”

“My fault.” You nodded resolutely, ignoring the twinge of discomfort it caused. “I wasn’t careful. I was distracted. I shot you.”

“That was a accident.”

“That doesn’t matter, Daryl!” Your voice escalated. The tears stinging your eyes threatened to fall. The walkers beyond the fence zeroed in on the noise and began to gather. The bowman glanced over, assessing the situation. When the fence held the extra weight, he looked back to you, your cheeks now wet before you angrily wiped at them with the back of your hand. “I’m a liability out there. You need someone better to—”

“Hey,” he cut you off, with a hand on your knee, “ya got my back out there. You do.” Daryl ducked down his head, searching for your gaze. “Ya got yer shit together. Y’know what yer doin’ out there. There ain’t no one I trust more. Ya hear me?”

Confusion twisted your expression. You turned to face him, careful that your legs didn’t bump his. “Then why?” You asked with a gentle shake of your head. “Why did you fight me so hard about going out?” You watched several emotions skitter across the archer’s face, but he settled on one: guilt. He scowled deeply, bottom lip caught between his teeth with his gaze anywhere but on you. “Daryl?”

“I, uh—” You saw a spot of blood on his lip before his tongue quickly erased it. “I just—need to know you’re safe.”

He wasn’t making much sense. “If you know I can take care of myself, why are you worried?”

His face began to redden, the color spreading down his neck and up to the tips of his ears. “Damnit, y’know I ain’t no good with words, kid!”

“Obviously. Because I’m not a kid.” You chuckled, your fingertips brushing his cheek before you used your palm to coax his head to turn. He kept his eyes stubbornly downcast, his hand immediately lifting his thumb towards his mouth. You intercepted and gently pushed his hand to his lap, keeping your own over it. “Just say what you mean.”

Daryl swallowed hard, his jaw clenching while he slumped in the chair. You knew where this was headed. He was trying to process something deep; something important. When faced head on with emotions, there was only one thing Daryl could count on: his anger. When his fingers folded into a fist below your hand, you didn’t let him pull away.

“We don’t need to talk about this. Let’s just table it for later, alright?” You smiled gently and moved to turn yourself forward, away from him.

This time, it was him that stopped you from pulling away. “Nah.” When you turned your face back to reassure him things were okay, he met you there. His lips pressed against yours firmly, almost aggressively. This definitely wasn’t something he had planned. Soon enough, the pressure minimized and you were able to react. Your brain was currently short-circuiting but you managed to move your mouth against his, finding a rhythm in the hungry dance.

Of all the things Daryl could “say” to you, this was definitely not on your bingo card for the year. His hands gently held the sides of your neck, calloused fingers sliding up your skin to tangle in your hair. Your own hands found purchase in the front of his vest, using it to keep him close to you; afraid that he would change his mind now that you had accepted his confession. And that’s what this was.

A confession.

Daryl was a man of action, not words. He had been for as long as you had been a part of his life. So this? You could decipher this pretty easily. He cared about you more than a friend. He was willing to be vulnerable with you. He trusted you. He worried about you. He wanted you close by and safe. He loved you. Was he in love with you? That was the only question left. You definitely didn’t mind waiting for the answer as long as he could keep kissing you like this.

You tried to pull back to breathe, but he held fast, tongue licking into your mouth the moment it opened to protest. Drawing a deep breath through your nose, you couldn’t help but let out a content sigh and allow yourself to taste him as well. Tobacco smoke and a hint of spice that you found delicable, craving more as you began to take charge. Releasing his vest, you opened your palms and pressed him against the back of the chair. Your lips never left his, even as the angle changed for you to be standing over him. He had released your hair and settled his palms on your hips as you lowered to straddle his lap.

You had begun to wonder just how far this would go when your full weight settled onto him, and he yelped (in a very manly way, if anyone asked) against your mouth. You pulled back, tripping over his boot and crashing toward the floor. Daryl tried to stop your descent, managing to catch your bicep which led to your hand gripping the front of his vest while your leg was still trapped behind his. You successfully pulled him off the chair, the pair of you meeting the concrete one right after the other.

You laid there for a moment, stunned and assessing the situation. When your eyes met Daryl’s wide blue gaze, you couldn’t stop the laughter that bubbled up from somewhere deep inside. The entire prison could probably hear you but you couldn’t find it in you to care. Especially when you heard the brief chuckle from beside you.

“Great first kiss, Dixon.” You let your head gingerly fall back, the stitched wound beneath your hair still tender. “Top notch.”

“Shut up.” There was no heat behind the words. In fact, he sounded rather relaxed. “First, huh?”

You grinned at the stars, wondering how red his face would be if you chose to look at him at that moment. “Of many.”

He hummed in reply. You started to rethink your words, worried that you were putting too much pressure on him, but then you felt his finger brush over the back of your hand. He didn’t do more than just press his hand against yours but allowed you to wrap your index finger around his. For several moments, the two of you laid there, silent but comfortable in it.

“I’m still on watch.” You finally said, already missing his touch when he moved his hand away. “I guess I should be, you know, watching.”

“Mhmm.” He replied. You turned your head to watch him struggle to his feet, hurrying to get up yourself to steady him. Once he found his balance, you let go and took a deep breath. You didn’t want this moment to end.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“‘Course.” He gave you a look that meant you should have known the answer already.

“Night, Daryl.” You plopped back down onto your chair and looked out through your binoculars while you waited to hear the door close. When it didn’t, you turned to find him still standing a few feet away.

“You, uh—if ya want some company, I could—y’know, stay.” He was blushing again, rubbing the back of his neck like he had when he’d first arrived earlier. You’d never tell him how adorable he looked. He’d likely murder you in your sleep. So, you smiled and nodded before patting the other chair.

“Yeah, I’d like it if you stayed.” As he limped back over, you felt a warmth rise and settle in your chest, one you hadn’t felt since before the world ended. Actually, this was new. This was different. This was the beginning of something. Something beautiful born out of darkness and death. Something you’d fight like hell to hold onto.

And you’d never have to fight alone.

#murda writes #daryl dixon #daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon fanfic #daryl dixon x y/n #daryl dixon x you #the walking dead #Spotify

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ghulah · 4 months ago

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Papa Emeritus, Terzo and the weight of the Mitre.

Due to popular demand, here is my Terzo analysis. It has been significantly cut down(if you do want the uncut analysis, here) because most of it was bullet points and unhinged notes I made. To be completely transparent, this was inspired by @cityofmeliora's own Terzo analysis post as well as several other analyses which I will be linking (also some headcanon stuff the wifecule had cooked up together lol).

These are all the posts (1 2 3 4 5 ) I used as resources and this compilation of Ghost interviews, as well as the Metal Myths part 2, because that's sort of required viewing at this point, isn't it?

I'll be splitting this analysis up into sections, first are brief descriptions and explanations of my understanding of the different aspects of Terzo - as Papa, as a Cardinal and as himself.

As for my sources, I won't be inserting the direct quotes here(because this post would be the longest ever) and they are all available in the aforementioned links.

Anyway, onwards, Ghesties!

First of all, What is Papa?

This is in reference to Papa, the entity, the image - not the person. Papa is a character, he's a mask, he's a façade. He is an image and an idea and the face of the Clergy. He is everything and he is above all yet he is not. According to mister Ghost-man himself, he is a stereotype, he is someone you know from somewhere and often than not he's old, charismatic, maybe a little bit bitter. He is sort of nebulous, he is a concept.

All whom take up the mantle, the Mitre, live up to this to a certain degree, it's part of the job! It also might be part of the bloodline, but y'know.

In that case, who is Papa Emeritus III?

The character of Papa III, the performer, the leader, the one to show us the way. Papa III is the face of the Ministry, he is a showman, a diva who is perfect for the role of the Satanic Pope who is not only theatrical, but also charismatic and fun and ambitious! He is artistic and outspoken. He knows what he's doing, he loves having a good time - drinks, partying, sex! He encourages it, as long as everyone is safe. He wants to bring about a new age, something to thrive. He will lead us all to damnation!

Papa III cares for his people, he makes sure they are safe and sound even in the midst of the chaos of the Rituals. He is, after all, the messenger that leads the audience through the hero's journey - a guide.

Cardinal Terzo

Let me be clear, this is all derived from Bishop Necropolitus Cracoviensis (who is representative of the album artist Zbigniew Biela) testimonial on Terzo when they were buddies back in Poland.

Cardinal Terzo was a slutty slutty, party man with a revolution in mind. He actually had a lot of visions and ideas to keep the Ministry going and modernizing it. He seemed super, well, locked in. He also likes Futurism, which aligns with his Art Deco and German Expressionism in his box of early 20th century art movements. He saw a future and he wanted to bring it to life, he held the same sins as his brother, Vice, Lust, Greed - but he had Ambition (credit to user cityofmeliora for this epiphany). That's what set it all off. Cardinal Terzo had that joie de vivre.

But who is Terzo?

Terzo Emeritus is a man of many pleasures - it's just those pleasures don't often involve people. He likes early 20th century fashion, he likes early 20th century art movements, he likes theater, he participates in it. He does have a pleasant personality, perfectly charming and joyful and teasing - but, he's not 'on' all the time. Or rather, he might not genuinely feel that way unless something or someone actually interests him. He might not be as slutty as everyone thinks he is. He moves like a fucking cryptid when he isn't performing, which is even funnier considering how open he seems to act. He wanted to do so much as Papa, he cared a lot. He had so many ideas, he wanted to take care of his flock and wanted to spread his ideas and cement the Ministry as a real power by opposing all those mindsets that keep holding society back. He was a revolutionary taken out too soon for another agenda at play, which is his true tragedy.

If anything, his charming Papa persona is what draws people in - but it's untouchable, because it's an idea, a face he puts on. Terzo is most likely the mellow, a toned down version of that face. Secondo influenced him, not enough for him to be exactly like him, though, so.

On a very real level - he's sort of like that 'when your circle small but y'all are crazy' meme. He has only a few people who are truly close to him and know what he wants and who he is while everyone else is on the outside looking in. He seems to keep people at bay, even the ones he approaches first. It's the people who either stick around and play along long enough to catch all his little ticks or the ones who saw through it all in the first place who get close to him.

That self hatred and hatred of everyone came a little later, when everything started to not fit into place anymore. He had restrictions on him, he couldn't bring his vision to life - he began to resent that idea. He knew that he was expendable, it was inevitable that he would be gone soon. He was still Papa, he cared, he wanted better for the Ministry. But it was, to a point, all for nothing if he was going to be stifled.

Ambition and hubris being his downfall is just a repetition of every Greek Tragedy we've been told. And much like the Bringer of Light, Terzo was brought down to Hell. Thanks Sister Imperator.

Sorry if some of this sounds a bit silly, it is quite self indulgent and made when I was sleep deprived. But also, I love character analysis and I love Ghost so!

Bonus tidbit: All that talk of separate travel made me think that Terzo might like sightseeing as a fun headcanon. So in my mind he might have a film camera stashed somewhere to take with him. It fits with the idea that he is quite a recluse and takes time to himself, he doesn't need to socialize to go out and see things and take pictures. Of course this is also extrapolated from his nerdy film and art interests. (this part was inspired by a convo with @3hroo)

#the band ghost #papa emeritus iii #ghost bc #papa terzo #terzo emeritus #terzo headcanons #terzo analysis #warden speaks #papa iii #terzo characterization #analysis #lore

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watchmegetobsessed · 2 years ago

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❄️HOT AND COLD❄️

A/N: week 2 of fanficmas yeah!! this was the first fic i wrote, some good ol' college!harry to get you all cozy hehe

WORD COUNT: 2.1k

SUMMARY: You decided to spend two more days at the dorm before heading home to have some peace and work on your assignments. However you didn't expect them to turn the heating off once everyone left. No worries, the hot guy living next door is ready to keep you warm.

MASTERLIST | SUPPORT ME!

This fic is part of ❄️ FANFICmas 2022 ❄️ Read more about fanficmas here!

You thought staying two extra days in the dorm before going home for the holidays would be a great idea. Have some quiet and peace for yourself, finish some assignments so you don’t stress about them during Christmas. Theoretically, it was a fantastic idea.

In reality? The worst one you’ve ever had.

You didn’t think they would turn down the heating the moment the dorm empties out. Well, it’s a logical thing to do, but it never occurred to you and you only realized it when the temperature started dropping significantly after the last wave of students left in the morning. You went out to run errands and you could feel the change when you arrived back. The hallways were chillier and your room started to feel like a cave. At first you just sucked it up, put on a hoodie, wrapped yourself in a blanket and got down to business. Your uncle always said you can decide whether you’re cold or not, so you kept thinking about hot things to keep your mind off of how freezing it was starting to get.

Hot tea.

Hot chocolate.

A tub of hot water.

Freshly baked, hot cookies.

The hot guy next door.

Wait, what? How did you end up thinking about Harry?

As you sit on your bed with your textbooks surrounding you, an all too familiar voice makes your ears perk up. You’d recognize it anywhere and it never fails to make your heart pitter-patter, but now you’re surprised to hear it since you thought you were the last one left in the building.

Well, you were wrong.

You hear Harry Styles striding down the hallway, singing Jingle Bells without a care. You get out of bed before you could think and throw your door open, catching him by surprise judging from the little jump he does as he turns around.

“Y/N? You’re still here?”

“I was just about to ask the same question from you,” you chuckle, stepping out into the hallway, but your smile soon turns into shock when you see him sporting shorts and just a shirt. “How have you not turned into ice wearing that?”

Chuckling he looks down at himself.

“I have a heater of my own. I could turn my room into a sauna,” he jokes and you can’t help a stupid laugh that slips out of your mouth.

You always lose your cool around him, he’s been your ultimate college crush since you moved in at the beginning of the semester and you usually end up making a fool of yourself in front of him. Whether it’s talking gibberish or dripping eggs when he walks into the kitchen, he has seen you at your worst in these two months you’ve been living next to each other.

“You’re not going home for winter break?” he asks, striking up a conversation and you pray you don’t embarrass yourself this time.

“Oh, I am, but only late tomorrow. Wanted some alone time before going home to the family, study and stuff, you know…”

“Clever,” he nods with a smile.

“What about you?”

“I’m leaving tomorrow too, I was supposed to go home today, but my flight got cancelled.”

“That sucks, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” he shrugs. “You’re sitting in your cold room all by yourself?”

“Well, not everyone has their own fireplace,” you snort out a laugh, but it sounded funnier in your head for sure.

“Come over to mine,” he offers and you have to fight yourself not to let your mouth hang open.

You’ve hung out before, ran into each other at parties and while your crush is deeply rooted at this point, you two aren’t exactly the closest friends, you haven’t been in his room before, haven’t even hugged him so entering into his private space is the most intimate you’d ever get with him.

“Um, I don’t want to bother—“

“Y/N, you’re not bothering, I’m just playing video games.”

“B-But still…”

“You’d rather freeze to death in your room than to be around me? I have to say I’m a little hurt.” With a hand over his heart he gives you a disappointed look, though you can tell he’s just teasing you.

“You really don’t mind?”

“I wouldn’t have invited you over if I did. Come on, bring all your stuff.”

And so you end up moving over to Harry’s room that feels like paradise. The temperature is perfect, you can get rid of your hoodie as you settle on top of his bed while he sits by his desk with his PC, some kind of action game paused on the screen.

His room is oddly tidy for a college boy. The bed was made even before you appeared, there are no dirty clothes on the floor, only in the hamper in the corner, his bookshelf is crowded, but it seems to have a system in it that probably only he knows.

“Is it warm enough?” he asks, settling at his computer.

“Yeah, thanks,” you nod, feeling a bit out of place, but the warmth feels nice.

“Cool,” he nods before turning back to his game and unpausing it.

For the first hour you just coexist in peace. It takes you some time to focus on studying with Harry being so close and also being in Harry’s room, but the feeling wears down and you can finally work efficiently while he keeps himself busy with his game. But then he stops playing and becomes more interested in whatever you are doing.

“You haven’t finished this sheet yet?” he asks, holding up the statistics task sheet you’ve been putting off for over a month now.

“No,” you sigh in defeat. “I’m not really good at statistics.”

“Want me to help? I’m in Dr. Thomson’s Thursday class, but we went over the same thing too.”

“It’s my homework, I don’t want to bore you with it.”

“It’s fine, I actually liked these tasks.”

So then the evening turns into tutoring, Harry sits on the bed beside you, explaining you how to solve the tasks and even shows a better method you understand way more than what you were taught. After that, he just sticks to studying with you, though it slowly turns into anything and everything but studying. He clearly loses interest in helping you, but he doesn’t seem to want to leave you alone and your focus breaks too. Of course you’d rather hang out with Harry than write a paper on Switzerland’s economy!

You’re having a blast. Both of you. It’s the first time hanging out one-on-one, but it’s going better than you imagined. You haven’t made a fool out of yourself, even cracked some jokes that made him laugh, though he is surely the funnier one. He is telling you all kinds of crazy stories from before college and also asks you about your high school years.

“Mm, this was great, though I did not get as much done as I planned to,” you chuckle, taking a look at your stack of textbooks.

“But we had a good time and that’s all that matters,” he grins at you, hugging his pillow.

“Alright. I’ll get out of your hair,” you move to pack your things and return to your room, but then he speaks up.

“What are you doing?”

“Going back to my room.”

“You didn’t think I would let you sleep in the cold, did you?”

“What, you want me to sleep here?” you raise your eyebrows at him.

“Sure. There’s plenty of space for us. You’re sleeping here tonight,” he simply states.

About twenty minutes later, you’re sitting on the edge of his bed in your pajamas, waiting for him to return from his shower.

You’re really about to sleep in the same bed as Harry Styles. Hopefully you won’t kick him in the groin or say something stupid in your dreams or drool on him or—“

“You look worried,” he comments as he walks in, dropping his used clothes into his hamper. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, everything is fine. Totally awesome and perfect!”

God, you are so awkward!

“Okay,” he smiles to himself. “Take whatever side you want. It’s not a king sized bed, but it’s fine for two people for one night.”

You gulp at the thought of Harry spending the night here with another girl, jealousy bubbles in your chest.

“At least Niall and I survived the time he got locked out of his room,” he adds with a chuckle and you exhale in relief.

You end up taking the inner side of the bed and you lie on your side as he makes himself comfortable on the outer side. It’s really not too spacious, but at least it’s warm and smells like Harry.

“Thanks for… letting me crash here,” you whisper into the silence. Harry turns to you with a tiny, but charming smile.

“I’m glad it’s you I have to share my warmth with,” he cheekily says and heat rushes into your cheeks right away. “Good night, Y/N.”

“Good night, Harry.”

You knew you’d end up tangled together. It was inevitable in such a small space. But still, your heart starts racing when you wake up and find yourself cuddling Harry, who has his arms around you as well. He’s warm and soft, definitely meant to be cuddled in your humble opinion.

He stirs in his sleep and your heart jumps when his eyes flutter open. He doesn’t move away, in fact, he pulls you closer as he exhales lazily.

“Good morning,” he mumbles groggily.

“Mornin’,” you breathe out, feeling like a giddy little girl.

“I hope you weren’t cold,” he chuckles softly and you feel his chest vibrating underneath your cheek.

“No. I felt nice and warm.”

“Alright,” he smiles. “When is your flight?”

“Five thirty. What about yours?”

“Six. Want to share an Uber to the airport?”

“Sure,” you nod.

You spend most of your time left together. You grab a late breakfast, then hang out in his room and not just because his room is the only place in the building that hasn’t turned into a freezer. It feels natural to be around each other.

Then you share a ride to the airport, grab coffee and then wait together until it’s time for you to go to your gate.

“Well, have a great time at home,” he smiles at you.

“You too. Thanks for… everything,” you chuckle softly. “I’ll see you after the break and...”

Don’t forget about me, you want to say, but you bite it back.

There’s something hanging between the two of you, something unsaid and you fear you’ll have to leave without changing that.

“Okay, I’ll… go,” you mumble, grabbing your suitcase, but before you could walk away, Harry pulls you back.

“When we come back, do you want to… Do you want to go out? With me?”

You can’t stop your mouth from hanging open this time, his question came as a total shock.

“Honestly, I’ve been crushing on you for a while, but every time we spoke you seemed so frightened and ran away, so I took it as a sign,” he admits with a nervous chuckle. “But I think last night was nice, I liked hanging out with you and there’s a chance you feel the same way, so I thought I would… shoot my shot.”

You open your mouth, but then close it as his words sink in. He thought you didn’t like him. Because you ran away from him. But that was because you were into him. What a mess.

“Yes,” is all that comes out of your mouth at last.

“Yes as in…?”

“Yes, I want to go out with you,” you elaborate chuckling. “And I only ran away because I really liked you and I was too nervous.”

You watch his face light up before he nods.

“Great! I mean, not that you were too nervous,” he grins. “So then… Date. When we come back.”

“Yeah,” you nod, mirroring his widening smile. “I have to… I have to go now.”

“Alright. See you… next year then,” he chuckles and leaning closer he kisses the corner of your mouth before you part ways.

After that, you’re basically glued to your phone, nonstop talking to Harry throughout winter break and you’ve never wanted to return to school so badly before. You text, call and send pictures to each other continuously and you can’t even remember the times when it wasn’t like this.

When you return to campus in January, your excitement is kicking high, though on the day of your arrival, Harry’s responses come way less often than they used to, but you’re not trying to see too much into it.

As you’re unpacking your suitcase there’s a knock on your door and when you open it, your heart skips not just one, but probably several beats when you see him standing in the hallway with a bouquet of flowers in his hands.

“Don’t you feel cold in here? I think you should come over to my room.”

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed and buy me a coffee if you want to support me!

#fanficmas #fanficmas 2022 #fanficmas2022 #watchmegetobsessed fanficmas #watchmegetobsessed fanficmas 2022 #harry #styles #harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles oneshot #harry styles one shot #harry styles fluff #harry styles x you #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #harry styles blurb

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robininthelabyrinth · 1 year ago

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The Other Mountain - ao3 - Chapter 32

Pairing: Lan Qiren/Wen Ruohan

Warning Tags on Ao3

————————————————————–

Dear Shixiong,

Welcome back! I hope you had a very enriching and meaningful year in seclusion.

I wanted to –

(Note to self: when you write the second BETTER version of this, add some formal greetings & well-wishes here first before you get to the actual stuff. DO NOT forget this time! EVEN IF it’s boring! Remember that Shixiong likes it when you’re being properly formal!)

I know it’s a little inappropriate to leave a letter under your doorstep for you to read as soon as you rejoin the world. I know you’re supposed to be spending your final moments of seclusion and your first moments of coming back to the rest of the community in thoughtful contemplation, considering the concepts of transition and the transient nature of time, not immediately getting shoved head-first into the petty matters of the world. I would never want to interrupt you while you do that, since I know how important it is to you, and to your cultivation, and I would definitely never ever EVER do it lightly.

I even admit that sending you a letter like this could maybe be seen as a violation of Do not use frivolous words.

Despite all of that, I hope you can forgive your favorite Shidi for the impertinence. In case all of that wasn’t clear enough, this is Lan Zhijin writing to you. You remember, Lan Yueheng’s eldest son? Lan Yanyu’s little brother? The one who used to always follow you around everywhere -

I assure you, I actually have a very good reason for deviating from tradition in this case. After all, tradition is only tradition, and the rules supersede it, particularly Appreciate good people, see friends as neighbors, and be considerate of others. Also, if you disagree with my evaluation and decide that you’re going to report me to the Discipline Hall anyway, can you at least tell them not to hit too many times, okay? Scratch that, tell them kneeling is sufficient, no hits at all! I’m acting in good faith here, Shixiong, really!

Listen, when you read the rest of this, you’ll see what I mean, and you’re going to thank me for doing this for you, I promise -

You see, Shixiong, ever since you entered strict seclusion a year ago, there have been a number of changes in the Cloud Recesses which are rather more significant than the usual. To put it mildly

I know you must be thinking to yourself, ‘How much can things really have changed? It’s the Cloud Recesses, the Gusu Lan sect, it’s been the same for generation upon generation’ and before you complain, this isn’t a breach of Don’t make assumptions about others, I just know you and of course you’d be right. The fundamental core of our Gusu Lan sect is still there, still going strong, and there are even a few new rules on the Wall of Discipline, as you might have expected. But despite that, there have also been some fairly significant events which have resulted in certain changes that are sufficiently noticeable, and maybe even shocking, that I think that you would want to be prepared in advance before you went out and encountered them.

It’s not gossip if it’s news, you know!

I’m doing this for your sake, Shixiong, really! Not because I want to be the first to tell you –

Really, it would be much funnier if I could see your face when you read this ACTUALLY. But Be easy on others, be hard on yourself is a rule so I won’t prioritize my own amusement over your well-being. See, Shixiong, that’s how much I like you –

First, when you come back, you may very quickly notice a considerable decrease in the average age of the people you see. By this, I mean that you will probably notice pretty quickly that there aren’t any elders walking about the place stroking their beards and talking about the weather and sometimes lecturing innocent juniors who really didn’t mean to break the rule about running, they were just a little bit excited –

It’s not a violation of Talking behind the backs of others is prohibited if it’s true, Shixiong.

Well, when you notice it, rest assured that you aren’t missing anything, and you aren’t just seeing things. There really aren’t any elders around! They’re all temporarily absent, having each and every one of them either retreated into seclusion to go contemplate and cultivate themselves, or else out into the world to increase their virtue through night-hunts and other beneficent acts. Which you really wouldn’t have expected a bunch of old grandpas that usually like to sit around to play weiqi and gossip all day to be able to do but there you go. Don’t make assumptions, right?? Why would they do this, you may ask? Particularly in such numbers? Especially the ones who tended to be a bit more full of themselves? That’s a very good question. You may even now be thinking of all sorts of reasons and engaging in lots of speculation wondering what happened.

Well, you can count on your shidi for the answer, Shixiong, since there is absolutely NO way you are going to be able to guess. EVER. So I’m going to tell you out of the kindness of my heart what happened.

And what happened is this: the elders are all gone because Teacher came back and gave them such an incredibly harsh talking-to for breaking the rules that they all felt so bad about themselves that they decided they needed to do some self-reflection.

Yes, I know how ridiculous that sounds. I KNOW! But on the other hand you’ve got to give it to Teacher, he’s REALLY good at scolding people – you know the type the ones that make you feel both really guilty, like he expected you to do better because he knows you’re better than that, but also really proud, because he has full confidence that you will do better going forward because you’re good like that – anyway, the point is, they all temporarily resigned from their usual duties of supporting the sect through advice and counsel and went to go do other things. All of them. Every single one of them!

Except for one that we’re all pretty sure Teacher just flat-out killed.

Yes, killed. As in dead. As in totally dead. That’s crazy, right? Teacher! Teacher! LAN QIREN! Old righteous and rigid! Who would have thought he had it in him, right???

Trust me, I know it sounds crazy and I know how crazy it sounds, too. If I hadn’t seen it myself – okay, no, Do not tell lies– if I hadn’t seen Teacher come back to the Cloud Recesses with his Someone Did Something Wrong And It’s Actually Serious This Time face, go meet with all the sect elders, and then leave half a day later, and then not very long after there was the announcement about the funeral and Lan Zhengquan wasn’t even that old, okay, and then all the sect elders were talking about their resignation – oh drat, I haven’t explained why Teacher would be coming back yet –

On second thought, let me start from the beginning chronologically, as that may make things a little more less confusing. [Note to self: do NOT send this version of the letter to Shixiong. Remember what Teacher said – use one piece of paper to write down all of your ideas, figure out which ones you want to use and where, and only then use the second to write your final version with elegance and restraint.]

Okay, so –

I need to stop starting sentences like that, it’s actually not a very good transition. Do better!

Do you remember all those times when we were younger when we’d talk with all the other disciples about the Sect Leader? Not Teacher, since he was only ever technically acting sect leader, but the real one, Qingheng-jun, you know, the one who went into seclusion something like ten or eleven years ago and never seemed to come back out? Anyway, remember how we all said that he sounded really cool what with the way everyone always talked about his amazing swordsmanship skills and his handsome looks and the way he was supposed to be both smart and personable and really clever? Remember about how we all said that it sounded like it would be super awesome and cool if he ever came out of seclusion?

Well, about half a month after you went into seclusion, he really did come out.

It was NOT COOL AT ALL.

I mean, okay, it wasn’t that bad, I guess. The Sect Leader really is very smooth and charming and he’s an amazing swordsman from what little I saw, but obviously he’s also Sect Leader and very busy so I didn’t see very much of him at all. But it was so weird! He did everything so differently from Teacher! And not in good ways, I didn’t like it them at all, but in all sorts of weird ways, like the curriculum or discipline or sect priorities.

Shixiong, the older disciples nearly went to WAR!

If you had to go your mother would have been so upset! I would have been upset! I mean, what if you’d gotten hurt or something! I was so happy you were in seclusion and didn’t have to go. Not that I’m saying it’s a good thing you missed out on everything – wait, I got sidetracked.

Everyone was really excited to see the Sect Leader at first, especially the elders that remembered him well from before, and the seniors that were his friends from before he went away. It was a little sad, though, because Madam Lan had just died – you remember, his wife, the one who was sick and never came out? – and little Xichen and Wangji were really sad about that, as you can imagine. And since Teacher is the one raising them, he was really busy dealing with that, or trying to as much as he could, so maybe he didn’t have as much time to tell him about how things in the Cloud Recesses were supposed to work normally.

Personally I think it’s a little weird that the Sect Leader came out right at that time? I mean, his wife had just died! You’d think he’d have more reason to be in seclusion, grieving, rather than less. Jiejie said that some people deal with grief by needing to do work, so maybe that’s the reason? I mean, I don’t really understand why he went into seclusion for so long in the first place, and none of the seniors will explain. Shixiong, if you know, you have to promise to tell me, all right?

I’m sure Teacher would have eventually gotten around to explaining, which might have made it all right, but unfortunately, not long after, Teacher went into seclusion.

Before you start telling me Do not tell lies, I know it sounds weird, but it really did happen!

And no, I don’t mean seclusion like all those times Teacher tried to take a half-month off of work in order to go play music, which don’t really count because he was in his own house and you could still ask him questions as long as you sent them to him by writing, and he was still grading tests and doing sect paperwork (last time around I helped pick it up every morning and drop off the new requests every night, and ooh boy was there a lot of it, you should’ve seen, I NEVER want to be sect leader!!!), and of course Xichen and Wangji were still visiting him every day for dinner. In other words, definitely NOT seclusion. Anyway, I don’t think Teacher actually managed to stay in his house the whole half-month even a single time he tried it, so it really doesn’t count.

No, in this case, I’m talking about real serious business seclusion, like what you have been doing for the past year, the sort where you don’t talk to people on the outside and not even answer notes from your favorite shidi when they get shoved through your window, because you’re mean like that. Would sending one note back really have killed you…?

There were a lot of rumors at the time about why he did that. It just seemed so weird, you know, and badly timed? I’m not saying Teacher isn’t entitled to go into seclusion whenever he wants, of course he is, and he’s even entitled to go into seclusion to have a nice relaxing break because his brother is back and willing to take over sect leader duties, the way some of the sect elders seemed to suggest was the situation, but…it seemed weird and wrong.

I mean, what about poor Xichen and Wangji? Their mother just died! They were so upset already, especially Wangji – he was refusing to talk and tried to sit outside in the snow and it was awful, Shixiong, really awful. And then Teacher, who’s been raising them like they’re his own sons all this time, suddenly goes into seclusion? Something was definitely going on there! Something wrong!

Jiejie says I have a suspicious personality.

Someone claimed that Teacher got into a fight with the Sect Leader and the Sect Leader ordered Teacher to go into seclusion to reflect on himself, as a punishment, but that’s completely crazy, right? I mean, it’s Teacher. Even if he’s going to break a rule, he’s going to do it having drafted his own punishment in advance, and I’m pretty sure he’s never picked seclusion as a punishment. Probably because of all that paperwork.

Someone else said it was because he was actually on a super-secret mission for the sect to do something, but that didn’t really seem reasonable either. I mean, Teacher’s great and all, but he’s not really the super-secret mission sort of person, is he? He’s a little too straightforward.

Anyway, we were all really curious, but no one ever figured it out. The Sect Leader just smiled kind of a weird smile honestly, I’m not going to lie, and even jiejie agrees with me so you know it was really weird and shook his head whenever he heard people speculating, but that doesn’t really mean anything. I guess we’ll never really know. The sect elders never tell people anything if they think they don’t need to know it…

At any rate, as you might expect, the situation with Xichen and Wangji only got worse after Teacher went into seclusion. Xichen got super anxious about everything, really anxious, and Wangji reverted back to biting people and throwing temper tantrums, really bad ones, like some sort of feral street child. He even hit people! None of the teachers or caretakers could do anything to make him stop.

And Teacher didn’t break his seclusion to come help them, which makes it even more suspicious, in my opinion. It just seems so unlike him…I really wish a-Die had been around instead of on that long trip down to the south to get ingredients. He was always one of the few people who could talk to Teacher about things, and he’s always willing to tell me things he hears. My best source of gossip I mean my best source of NEWS abandoned me in my time of need!

Everyone was speculating an awful lot, though, and of course the teachers were handing out punishments for No talking behind the backs of others left, right, and center. And also down, up, and upside-down, but it still didn’t stop anyone.

One time, our whole class derailed because some of the older students wouldn’t stop talking about it in the context of discussing the importance of Honor your teacher and respect his teaching. It was super interesting and really quite clever, but I think it maybe made the teacher kind of uncomfortable? Probably because they were being really aggressive and pointed about some stuff, though I’m not entirely sure what point they were trying to make. That was one of the better teachers, though, because he let us have the debate anyway. Some of the other teachers just canceled class any time someone started talking about it or made us do self-study or whatever. Even after I pointed out that we were starting to miss things on the curriculum Teacher set out at the start of the year, no one seemed to care!

It occurs to me that you don’t care about any of this, so I’ll leave it out of the final version.

After Teacher went into seclusion, a lot of things began changing. At first it seemed just like curriculum changes, like there was a lot more sword training than usual, and also a lot of the seniors got really busy all of a sudden, so we juniors had to pick up a lot more of the chores. But later on we found out that the seniors were getting ready to go out on a super important mission that no one was allowed to know the details of – which was very exciting, at first. Everyone was talking about how it was the Sect Leader’s doing, that it was going to be something really exciting, an opportunity to win glory and honor for our Gusu Lan sect, you know, all the usual.

Except later on (much later, I’m skipping ahead a little), it turned out that the mission was going to be a war. Yes, a war, an affirmative war, by our Gusu Lan sect! I know, it sounds unbelievable, but it’s true. It was supposed to be a little border skirmish, the type everyone does well we usually don’t but OTHER PEOPLE do, but still, there was a lot of preparation and a lot of the seniors got dragged into it, whether they wanted to participate or not.

And before I forget, Xichen and little Wangji, remember how I said they were unhappy? Well, it turned out they were SO unhappy that they ran away from home. For real! They’re not even ten yet! And they MANAGED it! They managed to get out of the Cloud Recesses and all the way to the Nightless City where Teacher was staying!

Actually I’m kind of impressed with that. Even if Cangse Sanren found them nearby by coincidence and took them with her, ending up in the Nightless City by accident because of the war and all that, it’s still an achievement, especially given their ages…

Yes, you read that right, the war stuff happened after they disappeared. It wasn’t that people weren’t looking for them, because of course they were, but then the Sect Leader came back and said not to worry, so people stopped because they thought he knew where they were, and presumably he’d heard from Cangse Sanren or maybe from Teacher about it. I don’t know, the whole thing confuses me, I still don’t understand why we needed to go to war at all – I’m getting away from the point.

And lest you think that’s everything, there’s more to it than that!

See, at some point, Teacher left seclusion to go get married.

Without telling anyone.

Yes, Teacher. Yes, a marriage. Yes, left – he married out, not in. Yes, it was a secret marriage.

YES I KNOW IT’S CRAZY BUT IT’S TRUE!!!

The Sect Leader must have known about it, of course, because he’s both Sect Leader, the head of the clan, and Teacher’s older brother, and we all know that Teacher would never fail to obey proper protocol even if he was going to run off to elope.

Shixiong, I swear I go a little more crazy every time I think about it. I can’t believe Teacher eloped! Teacher! TEACHER!!!

Jiejie says that it’s possible that the Sect Leader arranged the marriage for Teacher, rather than it being at Teacher’s instigation, and that maybe he decided it wasn’t enough to make him go into seclusion but rather that he had to go away entirely. And she says I have a suspicious mind…

I mean, that would be ridiculous, right? If it was an arranged marriage, why would Teacher agree to it? Much less to marry out? And the Sect Leader would have to be the rottenest sort of bastard to set up an arranged marriage and then not give any of us the chance to give Teacher a proper send off, and he’s presumably not like that. I mean, that’s based mostly on my experience with Xichen and Wangji since obviously I’ve never met the Sect Leader myself, but it stands to reason, right? Teacher’s his little brother! No one would be that mean to their little brother, right, Shixiong?

I swear that was a genuine question, not a hint.

But wait – if you think Teacher eloping in a grand romantic fashion is weird, just wait till you find out who it was that he married. See, normally this is when I’d tell you to try to guess, Shixiong, but there’s no way that you’d get it, not even if you guessed a thousand times! And that’s why I’m your favorite shidi, because I’m not going to leave you in suspense about it.

The answer is:

Teacher married Qishan Wen’s Sect Leader Wen.

And before you ask, no, there hasn’t been some sort of coup in Qishan Wen or something. I really am talking about Wen Ruohan. Yes, THAT Wen Ruohan. The Wen Ruohan with the torture palace and the professional army and his fingers in every sect’s pie, the one who’s older than dirt but looks like a pretty boy, except you’re not supposed to say that part out loud. The one that everyone says is completely crazy but also really sneaky and clever, the one everyone says is going to take over the cultivation world one day and oh boy have I got news on that front for you, just be patient –

But you want to know what’s even stranger?

(Yes, Shixiong, I know you must be thinking to yourself: what could be stranger than Teacher marrying Sect Leader Wen?? And in fairness in normal times you’d be right to ask, because that was incredibly strange, but in this instance, the world is weirder than you could have possibly imagined!)

At the discussion conference that wasn’t – wait, I’m getting ahead of myself again

After they eloped, Teacher showed up with Sect Leader Wen to a discussion conference that Yunmeng Jiang sect had organized at the Lotus Pier, and that’s where they ended up announcing their marriage.

(Yes, that was the first announcement we had here, too. The Sect Leader didn’t tell anyone about Teacher marrying out, even though he must have known – he didn’t even pretend to be shocked, to hear some of the people who were at the discussion conference tell it. I guess that’s brotherly solidarity for you. Or something?)

Anyway, while they were there, they didn’t just formally announce the marriage – they also announced that Teacher had been married in as the husband. The HUSBAND!!!

Which, yes, means that Sect Leader Wen is the wife.

His wife.

And Sect Leader Wen agreed with it.

Which means: Wen Ruohan! Is! Teacher’s wife!!!

(As you might imagine, everyone immediately went to the library to read up on the rules regarding honoring your teacher’s wife. There was that one treatise written a few generations ago, the one that goes into detail, you may or may not remember it – well, it got so popular that the librarians had to make a request to the Discipline Hall for assistance in having the disciples who were assigned to writing out lines to make extra copies of it. There was such a fuss over it that I think it even got to the ears of the Sect Leader! I don’t know what he thought about it, but I bet it was really funny. Don’t you agree?)

Anyway, I’m going to let you pause to think about that a little bit more.

Wen Ruohan! The master of torture, the near-god, the would-be madman tyrant…is, to all appearances, extremely happy in his role as our Teacher’s beloved little wife!

I mean, I have no problem believing it of Teacher, if you know what I mean – everyone knows that when Teacher says jump, you say how high, it’s practically an unstated rule, and of course Teacher has always been very doting when it comes to people he loves. Look at how meticulous he’s always been about Xichen and Wangji! I bet that now that he’s married, he probably spoils his wife rotten…not that I think that Sect Leader Wen is easy to spoil. I mean, just think about the size of that dowry, right?

I mean, the Qishan Wen sect is all Sect Leader Wen’s, and he doesn’t even have sect elders to worry about because he’s so old and powerful. Even his wives don’t cause trouble and by all accounts seem to be pretty content with Teacher managing him, which is only reasonable, because Teacher managing anything makes it better. Practically a rule. Qishan Wen really are the sun in the sky, spreading their influence everywhere – I think they control a third of the cultivation world, if not closer to half.

Well back then anyway, before everything went down…I shouldn’t have crossed that out.

Well, it would be correct to say that Qishan Wen controlled a third or maybe a half of the cultivation world before you went into seclusion. There have been a few changes since then.

First off, before I get there, let me start with the mountain, and to explain the mountain, I need to explain the war. I unfortunately can’t tell you too much about exactly what was planned for the war, Shixiong, since I don’t actually know. The long and the short of it is that the Sect Leader decided we were going to have a border skirmish with one of the small independent sects, the sect elders didn’t object (or at least they didn’t succeed in objecting, which I personally think Teacher would have), and a lot of the seniors had to go to fight.

A lot of them were very stressed about it, some of them to the point of throwing up, but there wasn’t any choice. We were all so worried about them, Shixiong! Especially once all the other sects found out about it and it turned into a really big deal – we kept hearing all sorts of updates, about Lanling Jin hiring mercenaries and the local sects activating their defenses and the Wen sect’s army moving into the area – it was very frightening, Shixiong. I’m completely in earnest, it was terrifying. The thought of all of our shixiongs and shijies going to war and maybe getting hurt or even dying…I threw up once or twice myself, actually.

But don’t worry! Despite what a lot of us were afraid of, it all turned out all right in the end. Not because war isn’t as bad as we think it is, but rather because in the end we didn’t end up having to have a war at all.

There was an earthquake instead.

Some people said that it was caused by –

Well, some of the seniors were a little silly and believed –

There was this whole thing with Baoshan Sanren’s mountain supposedly moving –

In a somewhat amusing turn of events, Cangse Sanren, disciple of the celestial immortal mountain of Baoshan Sanren, apparently came by and made a joke that got a little out of hand –

Well, Teacher says that it was obviously a joke, anyway. But on the other hand, according to the seniors the timing was really suspicious and all, and also I think Teacher and Cangse Sanren are friends, so theoretically they could be engaged in some sort of cover-up, who even knows –

Listen, Shixiong, even if it’s fake it would be SO COOL if it were true –

There was an earthquake.

The earthquake was so powerful that it shook the foundations of one of the local mountains in the area (it was in a place called Xixiang, you wouldn’t have heard of it) and kicked off a terrible landslide, which was going to destroy the nearby towns and poison the local reservoir. I say ‘going to,’ because it didn’t, because Sect Leader Wen stopped it.

‘What are you talking about, Zhijin?’ I can hear you saying now. ‘Don’t be ridiculous, everyone knows that it’s impossible to fight a natural disaster, not even if you have a whole bunch of cultivators.’

WELL.

GUESS WHAT.

Turns out that when they say that Sect Leader Wen is powerful, they really, really mean it.

I mean, the entire cultivation world was absolutely shocked by what he did, so it wasn’t just a surprise to us. No one can entirely agree on what exactly he did or how he did it, but they do agree that he used some sort of secret cultivation art and just blasted all the rocks coming down from the mountain into dust before it could hit the towns.

Just…imagine that.

Shixiong, isn’t that so cool? And he’s our Teacher’s wife! Get it, Teacher!

Reminder: implications aren’t a violation of the rule against vulgar language.

Anyway, while or maybe shortly after Teacher’s wife fought a mountain and either won or at least got to a very respectable draw, a bunch of evil spirits (ghosts, spirits, corpses, everything) that had been hiding in the base of the mountain got out and started swarming everywhere. Luckily all the sects or at least many of them were already there, because they were expecting to have to go to war, and so everyone was able to go deal with them at once. It was a whole big thing! Everyone was fighting them, the whole cultivation world working together instead of competing against each other.

(Sadly something like that is not likely to happen ever again in either of our lifetimes outside of something artificial like a discussion conference or a big celebration. And we both missed this one, me because of age and you because of seclusion. Oh, well.)

Anyway, I wouldn’t be wasting your precious just-out-of-seclusion time with this update, Shixiong, unless I really thought it was important – I’m NOT gossiping just for the sake of gossiping – but rather I’m just giving you the background for all the stuff that happened after that. We’re talking big massive shifts in the entire cultivation world, Shixiong, stuff you really need to know about, you understand?

We’re talking about the change of power in multiple Great Sects, the rise of the Wen sect (well, continued rise anyway), and Teacher becoming the second or maybe first most important person in the entire cultivation world, which is so cool I sometimes think about it while daydreaming and then someone scolds me for violating Do not smile foolishly. I’m not the only one, either, everyone is violating that rule these days.

Now, because Do not tell lies,I will admit that I don’t know exactly what happened, since it’s still unclear – some things are really best left to later historians and record-keepers – but I can at least give you the general gist to the best of my understanding.

So, remember how I mentioned all those ghosts and spirits and corpses? Rumor has it that Lanling Jin’s Sect Leader Jin got possessed by one of them, apparently a libidinous ghost. Supposedly that’s how it got through all of his defenses as a cultivator and sect leader, because he was himself so libidinous that it attracted the ghost’s attention and it used that to get him. Jiejie says that it took the form of a beautiful woman and he couldn’t resist grabbing at her and THAT’S how it got him, which just goes to show that our ancestors were right about Do not indulge in debauchery and Promiscuity is forbidden.

It must have been a really super powerful ghost to manage to get to a sect leader like that, and it was a very vicious ghost, too, because it made Sect Leader Jin make a whole bunch of cursed gold coins which then got passed around to everyone in the cultivation world. It was really dangerous, Shixiong – everyone accepted them because it was polite (they were really ugly), but because they had a commemorative design, the sect elders were planning on letting people keep them. Imagine what might have happened if they hadn’t figured out that they were cursed! It would have been awful!

What we THINK happened is that the Sect Leader and Teacher must have met up somewhere on the battlefield and figured out something had gone wrong, somehow, because they were the ones that ultimately solved the issue. The Sect Leader went off to hunt down the libidinous ghost’s tracks, or at least that’s what must have happened because there’s no other reason why he would have just disappeared like that right after a big battle while Teacher and Sect Leader Wen went to investigate the rest of the cultivation world.

Maybe because Sect Leader Wen was the one who fought the mountain landslide, Sect Leader Jin the ghost possessing Sect Leader Jin also tried to have him killed right in the middle of the Lotus Pier. (Yunmeng Jiang sect was hosting a party to make up for the fact that everyone went home after the discussion conference; it’s not really important to the story, Shixiong, but if you have questions I’ll tell you all about it later because it is SOOOO funny). Teacher had to go rushing in to save his wife, like a hero rescuing a damsel in distress, a scene right out of a novel – I wish I was there to see that, even more than the mountain thing. Not because of how good a swordsman Teacher is (the Sect Leader is probably better, I GUESS) but, well, the idea of Teacher waving his sword around and charging in through a door to save his wife just sounds like it would have been amazing, right?

Especially because the wife is Sect Leader Wen. I mean, you’ve got to admit that’s funny, right??

After that, Sect Leader Wen took his army to Lanling City, Unfortunately, they weren’t in time to keep the libidinous ghost from killing Sect Leader Jin – supposedly he died in bed with a whole bunch of prostitutes because the ghost kept going and going until his heart exploded, if you know what I mean – and then possessing someone else, though I’m not sure exactly who. From what I hear, the Sect Leader ended up fighting and killing it in some sort of epic showdown, fighting side-by-side with Sect Leader Wen or something like that, but he was hurt really badly in the process and ended up dying.

Which is heroic and all, I guess, but also a little sad?

He spent so long in seclusion and died so shortly after he got out – it doesn’t seem fair.

Jiejie says that what actually killed the Sect Leader was more likely a broken heart. She says that even though the ghost must have been super powerful if it took over Sect Leader Jin, it wasn’t enough that it would have defeated our Sect Leader – certainly not with Sect Leader Wen to help out, even if he was still super tired from fighting the mountain – but that the Sect Leader was still so sad about his wife dying that he’d just wanted to do one last thing for the sect before he died, so when he defeated the ghost he was satisfied with what he’d done and so he died.

It sounds like a ridiculous load of romantic nonsense to me, but don’t tell Jiejie I said that –

On reflection, the suggestion made was a totally reasonable theory which I definitely don’t doubt in any way and also Jiejie says to say hi and best wishes on your return to you, Shixiong. Which I’m doing, because she’s the kindest, most beautiful and most forgiving jiejie in the world, with the sharpest eyes for READING OVER PEOPLE’S SHOULDERS, and also the one with the strongest pinching fingers with unerring aim right for my ear. Which still hurts.

Anyway.

My point is, think about that, Shixiong: both our Sect Leader and Sect Leader Jin died! And in our case, we didn’t even have Teacher around any more, because he married out, and then he comes back and does the most epic scolding in Gusu Lan history, causing all the sect elders to retire, leaving us completely bereft…!

It’s madness, Shixiong, I’m telling you, madness!

Okay, maybe not madness, I’m exaggerating. It could be much worse. At least we still have Teacher! Even if he is going to be mostly managing the sect providing advice on managing the sect from where he lives in the Nightless City, though of course they’re going to be promoting a lot of the sect seniors that were already doing things to do most of the day-to-day stuff (but more importantly we’ll still have Teacher, too, because Sect Leader Wen has already agreed that they’ll spend a little time out of every season or two in the Cloud Recesses, as needed, until Xichen and Wangji get old enough to start apprenticing as future sect leader/second-in-command).

Before you start worrying, Shixiong, we’re not actually becoming a subsidiary sect of Qishan Wen. Teacher would never let that happen.

Least of all to Xichen and Wangji, who are going to inherit it eventually!

Anyway, we’re still definitely in a better situation than, say, Lanling Jin, whose only option for sect leadership is a six-year-old child. His mother, Madam Jin, is temporarily acting as sect leader in his place, but given everything that happened with the ghost, Sect Leader Wen has stationed a battalion of his army at Jinlin Tower to make sure that nothing goes wrong.

Now THAT is called becoming a subsidiary sect, even if Lanling Jin will never admit it.

At this point, Shixiong, you may be thinking to yourself – wow! That’s a lot of change! The Qishan Wen sect has extended its influence over two Great Sects and all of their subsidiaries!

BUT THERE’S MORE.

It seems like, either during the events of Xixiang or shortly before, Qinghe Nie’s Sect Leader Nie suffered from a minor qi deviation – and you know how Qinghe Nie sect leaders tend to be with qi deviations. Anyway, since he’s friends with Teacher and Sect Leader Wen, they all put their heads together along with the Nie sect doctors and they seem to have come up with a way to keep him from having any more qi deviations. Now obviously I don’t know what that method is, since no matter how it was created, it’s officially a Qinghe Nie sect secret now, but what I do know is that whatever the method is, it involves Sect Leader Nie needing to retire from being sect leader in another year or so.

Apparently he’s going to go travel the world with Cangse Sanren and her husband, because he’s promised to kill some sort of beast for her in exchange for something that she’s doing for him that helps with his qi deviation problem. Jiejie says that Cangse Sanren is so funny that she can use jokes to make his qi travel right and that’s why he needs to be with her all the time, but that seems dumb, right? Maybe? DO NOT TELL JIEJIE OR SHE’LL GET MY EAR AGAIN.

Interestingly enough, Shixiong, they came to check out something in our Cloud Recesses’ library once, and it turns out that Cangse Sanren’s husband – you know, Wei Changze, formerly a servant in Yunmeng Jiang – is actually a historian with an interest in curses and unorthodox cultivation styles. Cool, huh? I think he’s going to stick around for a bit, too, or at least until he’s made his way through most of the library, which will take a while.

What this means, though, is that his son, Nie Mingjue, is going to have to take over, and he’s not even fifteen yet. I think? Maybe he is. He could even be older. You know how the Nie are. Either way, I don’t think the Nie sect is going to install a regent for him, but obviously, at that age, he’s probably going to need a lot of help in running sect matters. His father will be able to help somewhat, but otherwise he’s probably going to need to reach out to his sect’s allies.

Which, if you think about it, are: Gusu Lan and Qishan Wen.

And more specifically, Sect Leader Nie’s good friends, Teacher and Sect Leader Wen.

If you’re keeping track, that’s now three Great Sects that Qishan Wen has somehow managed to get its claws into (with Teacher’s help, which only goes to show you how awesome Teacher is).

Now, Shixiong, you may be thinking to yourself: ‘Okay, I think I see where this is going. Now tell me who died in Yunmeng Jiang!’

Well, I’m pleased to tell you: nobody died. They’re all okay. For once.

They’ve actually had a very positive change for the better. You see, apparently, Madam Yu or maybe we’re supposed to call her Madam Jiang now? Madam Yu got inspired by Sect Leader Wen being Teacher’s wife despite being more powerful and the proper sect bloodline and all that. She apparently went and demanded that Sect Leader Jiang let her be the husband, because she was more suited for the role than he was. And he AGREED!

(Only Yunmeng Jiang, am I right? Attempt the impossible!)

So now Madam Yu is running Yunmeng Jiang and Sect Leader Jiang is helping her do it, I guess, but either way the rumor is that they’re both much happier now. Or at least you don’t hear stories about them fighting all the time anymore, anyway.

Oh, and their kids are also all right. Uh, I may have forgotten to mention, but actually Cangse Sanren temporarily took the two Jiang sect heirs with her so that they could get to know her son while spending time together on a road trip, which turned out to be the same road trip where she happened to trip over Xichen and Wangji. What a coincidence, right?

Which leads me to the best part: TEACHER IS GOING TO BE TEACHING AGAIN!!!

It’s not going to be at home, of course, because he lives in the Nightless City now. But all that means is that all of us juniors get to go to stay at the Nightless City (which is supposedly HUGE) so that we can all do our lessons there together! It’s going to be year-round classes, with month or two month breaks around all the big holidays, and it’s going to be great. Qinghe Nie is sending their young master, Nie Huaisang, with Nie Mingjue going to go as well to learn how to run a sect from Sect Leader Wen, and Lanling Jin’s Jin Zixuan is going to be there (he doesn’t get a choice), Xichen and Wangji are obviously going to be there because Teacher is there, the Wen heirs (I think there’s two of them? maybe more if you count in some of their cousins?) already live there, and the Jiang sect heirs got brought there by Cangse Sanren along with her son…listen, Shixiong, you know how Teacher always invites some people from other sects to join our lessons with him, right?

Well, imagine that, except EVERYONE is going to be there. It’s going to be so much fun!

Yes, you read that right – it’s going to be fun, for me, because your favorite shidi is going to be one of the people that gets to go! I’ve never been happier to be one of the age groups that Teacher teaches…if you come out of seclusion early enough, maybe you can try to get a spot too? You’re not that old, you could probably get in with the older group!

Please, please please, Shixiong? It would be so much fun to have you there!

And even if you can’t get a spot, maybe you can come help teach or something? Teacher has already had to start recruiting extra people to come help with the classes, since there’s probably going to be a fair number of us there. Someone to supervise self-study, keep an eye on the sword training, help the ones who don’t know music with the basics – that sort of thing.

Supposedly Sect Leader Wen even volunteered to personally teach a class on arrays!

Jiejie says Teacher might not let him do it if he doesn’t behave. Then she giggled for some reason? I’m pretty sure it’s some sort of innuendo, but I’m not sure I understand what she was referencing…

Speaking of Sect Leader Wen, if you’re worried about the Fire Palace, don’t be – he’s apparently working on dismantling most of the torture palace aspects of it and turning it into a hobby palace instead. Or, well, apparently it’s always been the Wen sect leader’s hobby palace, only the sect leaders before Sect Leader Wen made it a pleasure palace and he made it a torture palace.

And now it’s going to be a…study palace, I guess?

I don’t know exactly. I think it’s supposed to be a place where people do experiments with arrays, which are Sect Leader Wen’s specialty. I don’t think I know enough about it to really understand, I think, but there was something about studying what happens to spiritual energy when it gets really small or really big and how it interacts with all sorts of things, coming up with rules about how it works and then trying to break them and stuff like that…anyway, all of a-Die’s alchemist and artificer friends got really excited, and a lot of the sect’s philosophers did, too, so I’m taking that to mean that it’s a good thing.

At minimum, it’s lots better than a torture palace, anyway.

Not that I would expect anything less from our Teacher, of course. They say that he can make a gentleman even out of a waste – why not make a good wife out of a tyrant?

Don’t tell Jiejie I said that. Or anyone else. Just imagine if Sect Leader Wen heard about that…!

Actually, I don’t know, maybe he wouldn’t mind?

I actually saw Teacher and Sect Leader Wen recently. They came together to the Cloud Recesses on some sort of business – maybe related to that time Teacher just straight up murdered a sect elder for breaking the rules? Teacher is SO COOL – and they were walking together through the Cloud Recesses, their heads bent together as they spoke with each other. Sect Leader Wen really does only look like he’s only in his twenties, particularly when he smiles, and he was smiling at Teacher, who looked content and pleased and warm in the way he does when he’s had some time to work on his music or spend time on things that make him happy.

His whole face was softer, you know? And for once, he was actually getting the chance to walk around without getting bothered by either the sect elders (not present) or the juniors (too afraid of Sect Leader Wen). I don’t think I’ve ever seen Teacher look so peaceful.

They’re obviously in love.

It’s just nice to see, you know? You hear about all those stories about Gusu Lan as compared to other sects, and particularly about the idiosyncratic yes I know big words too, Shixiong, I can be elegant when I want to be ways that the Lan of Gusu Lan go about falling in love when they end up falling in love. It’s just so - so - why are words hard And in this case I just feel like it sort of feels like the right end, you know? You know the way that Teacher always seemed a little lonely sometimes, like he wanted to be one of the ones that fell in love like that, but he just happened not to have had a chance yet.

And now he found his chance.

I mean…okay, sure, he found his chance and his love with possibly the weirdest person ever. There are definitely people in the sect that are never recovering from the shock they got when word of Teacher’s marriage got out. But you know what, if it works for him, good for him.

I’m glad they’re in love.

And they were obviously in love.

Really obviously in love, even if they weren’t putting it on display or anything.

I mean, they were glowing. Both of them – I think it might even be a bit literally true? They seemed brighter than the surroundings, somehow. I called Jiejie over to look, and she agreed that they were cute! Which wasn’t actually my question, but I guess it’s true.

And I guess I can understand why Teacher decided to elope with him.

(But only because we still get to attend Teacher’s classes. If Sect Leader Wen took away Teacher for good, I would be sooooo mad!)

Anyway, Shixiong, I hope that this is helpful…

Uh, sorry shixiong, it looks like I may have misunderstood the exact time and date and uh, everything, and now I really have to go pack RIGHT NOW because otherwise I’m going to be super late and I mean SUPER LATE so uh I guess you’re just going to have to get this letter as is, hopefully I haven’t forgotten to cross out anything too embarrassing, have a nice time back from seclusion bye!!!

~ Lan Zhijin

P.S. FIND A WAY TO COME TO THE NIGHTLESS CITY! WE’RE ALL GOING TO HAVE SO MUCH FUN!

#mdzs #lan qiren #wen ruohan #my fic #my fics #Megafic

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as-thra · 17 days ago

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Aslan's parents :]!!! Charlotte Astolfo and Arthur Aureus during their student years <33

aureus lore stuff under the cut!!!!

Charlie and Art stuff first, Arthur went to Hogwarts and is a ravenclaw while Charlotte's an exchange student from Durmstrang, she attended Hogwarts from 5th-7th year

Both being purebloods with family traditions to uphold (yikes) they've had their own arranged marriages since before they were even born, then they fell in love with each other and went to ask both their parents to break previous engagements only to be informed that the engagement was with each other anyway IT WAS GOING TO BE ANGST BUT THIS WAS FUNNIER OK

Arthur's a dragons nerd and Charlotte captured one for him during their 7th year . Arthur n Sully then spent the day nerding out n riding the dragon around

Charlotte's bi and Arthur's pan!!!!!

THEY ALSO LOVE ASLAN SO SO MUCH AND THEY ARE VERY GOOD PARENTS!!!! HE LOVES THEM JUST AS MUCH

aslan is so his parents' son

aslan was a very sweet baby n they loved dressing him up in fancy clothes because they think its so cute ndndke, he was easy to take care of too if you ignore the accidental magic he'd be casting as a literal infant-toddler

OK MORE GENERAL AUREUS STUFF, their line is . a literal line that can be traced straight back to midas directly, maintaining pureblood status by traveling all around the world for their marriages just to avoid incest mdnsjed

it was done in an attempt to keep their magic "untainted" n as powerful as possible by mixing a shit ton of other magical blood into theirs (am!au note: they're doing this bc a time god said so, said time god is literally evanescoed winnie just in case ppl have missed the am post ab that msndjd)

and while they were successful with that there are still consequences!!!!!! down their line they had to limit their heirs to three then two then just one because they can see how many aureus running around could potentially be Bad considering the result of their selective marriages are literal children with more and more magic to the point it was possibly destructive

like with aslan!!! he had been casting spells from the crib, grew up with so much accidental magic, it also going haywire from time to time, the chances of each spell being accidentally cast with excessive magic and Going Wrong, literally the magical rebounds that caused scars climbing up his hands and arms!!! had to get those limiting rings he always wears to prevent his hands getting fucked up further

besides that! more about the heirs :] the women in their line had always and forever kept the aureus name, they were just as valued as the men and held as much power and respect, why would you take power from your own heirs after all

Arthur's mom was one of them :] Ahilya Aureus 🫶🫶

They've also just never believed in pureblood supremacy either HELDONEB they're only doing this because a time god told them to and eventually it was wueheeueeuhe yeah time god but also its Tradition now and meemaw would be upset no one wants that

And really as long as there was a child to carry the line it didn't matter what they went on to do, lots of queer ppl in their lineage n they were all adored!!! there would've definitely been some that even ended up with muggles n muggle borns tbh

they literally do not care they just want a magic baby

anyway main takeaway about the Aureuses: Descended from King Midas the guy with the golden touch thing, kids having more n more magic output til it's literally rebounding on them, have traveled the entire world and definitely has a cousin in almost every country 👍👍👍👍

#i was going to do background but i thought i'd die so i didn't #lion and lioness... i always did use lions as refs for the aureuses HEHEJDND #GOOD LORD THIS IS LONG SO SORRY that's probably not all we discuss our ocs so much i probably forgot some things help #aureuses 🫶🫶#silly guys #hpma oc #charlotte aureus #arthur aureus #am!au #lore stuff :]]]]

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thebottomfromhell · 11 months ago

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I read your Hantengu smut post from a while ago and I love the dynamic of him being with a teasing partner!!!! Aaaaahhhhhhh!!!

I can just imagine the grief reader would give him. Oops, undergarment flash! Oh, that’s my chest pressing against you! Woah, my hand slipped and gave you a little spank!

Welcome to a new episode of let's bully Hantengu (main body)! On the other hand, I'm glad you liked the post (even if idk which Hantengu smut post is 😅), I hope you also like this one.

Dynamic of Hantengu with a teasing/bully GN reader

Warnings: Slight bullying, Hantengu's... everything (+exagerating some things), Slight exposure of underwear, Implied sexual content and a Non-consented spank (ask for consent irl, people, ask if the other party is ok with it first).

Hantengu loves you, he loves you a lot. You are a spark of joy in his scary, miserable life, with your playful attitude and genuine, shameless, soul, how could he not? The problem is that, sometimes you get too playful, to the point he can keep up with it. Hantengu easily gets nervious, overwhealmed, anxious, scared or embarrassed, so maybe you could tone it down a bit? ....

Nah, what for? Honestly speaking, you like to see him startled, to hear him whine, sob and whimper, for him to tremble at the same time he holds into something or someone for comfort. He is so cute when he does, and so easy to tease you just have to. Just some words or touches are enough for hin to become a sweet mess only for you. Seriously, it's amazing this guy is supposed to be the fourth most dangerous demon after his king, because for you he is "My little crybaby. Do you want some cuddles, huh? Would you like me to make you feel better because everythin is swo scawy for Hantengu?"

He sobs again, burrying his face in your neck as his ears and face becomes each time more red, embarrased but not wanting to let go as you are both a source of comfort and grief. He doesn't even phantom how you can do it so easily, Karaku and Urogi he can get, they are an emotion so they can't really care about anything than enjoying things or do stuff they consider pleasurable. He doesn't know what is worse, when you use words or when you use your body to tease him.

It can be little things, like showing the side wings of the fudonshi over the pants, when you use them, having them showing off more the V line on your lower body. The first time it happened he made a little jump and a gasp, thankfuly none of the clones where there at the time, but it didn't help that you laughed about it, smirking. "Is something wrong? Did you see something?" In that second he couldn't move his eyes away as he started to tear up, you were still putting something on top, so he didn't know where to look.

"No, nothing!" And he looked away... for about an hour as he blushed violently and trembled, eyes closed hard and not a single breath coming out of his body. You laughed about it as you pressed yoursef against the back of his head, since he was sitting. "C'mon, love. Talk to me." He can feel your chest against him, and he starts sweating cold. "Y-Y-Y/N... Y/N your-" he stopped himself, not knowing how to call that body part in a way that is appropiate. "My... what? Tell me." Oh, you knew exactly what, but making Hantengu say it is way funnier. He stumbles in his own mouth, not managing to make out a single word as he blushes even harder and tears come out his eyes.

He is clearly overthinking. "What if I say it? Will it make me look like a pervert? Will Y/N accuse me of being one? I'm not a pervert! I didn't want to look! I didn't! I'm innocent!" And so on as he started breathing hard until you decided to have enough and started to comfort him, making him forget about it. Not that you didn't do it again, the exposed underwear was easily dealt with, he just stopped looking, moving his head everytime you were not using top or kimono. The body pressing was harder to get over from, but he just stays still when you do until you let him be or spice things up.

But then, it happened. Hantengu still has scars from when it happened, he never saw it comming. A normal night, he was just helping with something in the house, can't even remember what, and he was walking besides you, and the second he passed you... he felt it. Your hand hiting one of his buttlocks, making a loud noice as he feels the impact, tensing the second you make contact, face and ears heating up as an unnatural and miserable expresion takes over his face, throwing in the air the towels he was carrying as he lets a high pitched and even louder "EEEEEEEEEEAAAACK!! WHAT WAS THAT?!" feeling everything speeding up as he turns around to look at you, who was looking somewhere else, almost innocently.

"Hm? "What was" what?" He blushes harder as he doesn't know what to say. "You-you know... that." You try to keep your laugh to yourself, some choked chuckles scape, but you only smirk, face hurting in the process, as you ask again. "What?" You really want to laugh as tears start to form in his eyes, he just looks so lost, so cute and it's really hard to pretend you didn't do it when you both know you just spanked him. Hantengu starts to hug hinself as he starts subbing in confusion, a little inner though making him question if you may be actually telling the truth...

That though spirals as he breaks down into your arms. "I-I-I hat-hate you!" He days crying and you just had to tease more... leading to the current state. "Ok, shhh~ it's ok, I'm sorry. I am so sorry baby, I won't do it again, promise." He is having the grief of his life and you are having fun... he really hates you. It's always the same, you tease him and end up also comforting him. Why?! "A love you." You kiss the tumour in the top os his head as he calms down... that is why. He is trapoed like this, can't stand you but also can't have enough of you... he really hates you...

#demon slayer #kny #upper moons #kny x reader #top reader #hantengu x reader #hantengu

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eastgaysian · 11 months ago

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me: i guess it's just the more i think about it, the humor in/around bg3 starts to feel like larian cares more about pleasing people, even if it breaks immersion or flattens/flanderizes characters, than making a game that's fun and funny because of a consistent internal logic and sense of genre and setting.

the tulpa of tom wambsgans i keep in the attic: people do like funny games.

me: but what does it mean for a game as an interactive medium to be funny? like, people find it funny if a game is broken or janky, but a game can also be funny because the mechanics are working and they're designed in a funny way. like, the disco elysium skills are effectively their own cast of characters as a part of the mechanics, and intentionally made into a huge element of the game's humor. watching harry fumble is a lot funnier when the peanut gallery always has something to say about it. or even, i dunno, the very obsidian bit of dialogue choices going 'yes,' 'no,' '[lie] yes,' '[lie] no.' that's humor that relies on the nature of dialogue trees.

tulpa wambsgans, who i've forced to play disco elysium: right. there's plenty of times when you thought the mechanics of bg3 led to funny situations, though.

me: that's not exactly what i'm trying to get at. or it's not the biggest part of it. like, i feel like i've brought this up one too many times already, but the 'hot githyanki girlfriend' dialogue choice you get when romancing lae'zel - it's 'funny,' right? it's supposed to be funny.

tulpa wambsgans: i mean, it is, funny. isn't it?

me: i mean, not to me. i think it's fucking cringe. but it's like, why is that cringe to me, and not disco elysium's 'i want to have fuck with you?' on the surface, it seems like kind of similar humor, like it's your character saying stupid shit. but in disco elysium, the joke is on you-as-harry, because that became your dialogue option after you failed. and the... i'd argue central conceit of disco elysium, maybe, is that harry as an amnesiac wreck with a bunch of skills talking to him in his head is the only way to in-world make sense of a guy who acts like a video game character. and the joke is that you're a video game character selecting dialogue options, but if you were a real person, like harry's supposed to be, you'd seem like a fucking weirdo, and people in the game treat you like a fucking weirdo.

tulpa wambsgans: so what's the problem with baldur's gate 3?

me: i guess it feels like the joke is on the game for being a game that wants to be taken seriously? on the characters within it, for being characters that can only take the game seriously? i don't know if that makes sense. when you incorporate in memes like the god's favorite princess stuff or whatever it was, that's for the player, like almost as a reward for making that joke about the game outside of the game. but it's also, i mean, it's a huge... oversimplification of everything shadowheart's got going on, right? like, shar is or was explicitly abusing her.

tulpa wambsgans: it's a joke, though.

me: right, but what kind of relationship does that create, between the player and the studio, and the player and the game, if the player is rewarded for these kinds of jokes by having them funneled back into the game as part of its reality? the game of fandom telephone where canon events and characters get simplified and miscommunicated over and over, but this time the studio, the makers of canon, are in on it. i mean, it doesn't need to be about jokes, i think that just bothers me more because people tend to have such a positive reaction to jokes. like, lae'zel's dismiss to camp dialogue being changed as well as minthara's recruitment no longer conflicting with halsin's is i would argue part of the same problem.

tulpa wambsgans: ....does any of this really matter?

me: tulpa tom wambsgans you know i only come up into the attic to talk to you about shit that doesn't matter

#tulpa tom wambsgans #babbling

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or-echo · 1 month ago

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When I first drew that JC reference like three months ago, I didn't really expect that I'd turn it into a full *project,* but here we are anyways lol. I also didn't expect to draw Alex, let alone redesign her! But that's a long-ish story. All of them are relatively janky looking in their own right, but they're all just personal reference points so who cares.

Since this isn't exactly a *thrilling* artwork and I'm a little low on ideas for funnier/more engaging stuff, I think I'll do a little analysis on each design. Some cross between analysis and personal interpretation. Also explaining the intention behind the Alex redesign, since it's a departure from the original.

FOR PAUL;

Most of the visual interest in his design comes from the trench coat. Most evident when you *take* it from him. He looks almost bare without it. A lot of it may be the lack of the purple in his design; my hypothesis is that his design manages to be so eye-catching through a relatively successful triadic color scheme. Purple, green, and orange (brown, but it's a dark orange, in this case). Usually, triadic schemes are best used for their sharp contrast, but that's not the case for Paul. His design may not be outright *eye catching* but it is unique and will draw the eye, mostly due to the low saturation of his color palette. The colors don't fight or pop out too much. They share emphasis.

A funny side note- Paul's eyes are not the same as JC's, which I didn't realize until I colored him in properly. His eyes sit on a darker blue base- the bright blue, which IS the same as JC's, takes the place of the pupil. Meanwhile, JC's pupil is an even lighter blue.

Drawn at approximately 5'11.

FOR JC (male);

JC's outfit is undeniably a ripoff of Blade (1998), therefore, the best means to distinguish the two is through color palettes. JC gets to have his cold, moody colors, but they're not completely *dark.* Where Blade wears black, JC wears blue. Dark blues (mostly), but still blues nonetheless.

I took a few liberties with JC. I didn't quite like the look of the leg straps (and then I gave them to Alex- oops) so I replaced them with leg pouches instead. Better for storage & the tactical look JC is going for.

I also toyed with the idea of changing his hairstyle to a short one, but thought I'd keep the slicked back hair because I like the idea of him taking inspiration from his older brother. After all, the Deus Ex Bible said he admired him greatly when he was younger; the whole secret agent deal. I like to attribute the very 'action hero' look to that idealization as well. JC as a character is very idealistic, almost- if not outright- naive. His picture of the world is more fiction than reality until the events of the narrative rip it from him- or at least, that's what I interpreted. Compare him to Paul, who has a much simpler, more practical design. Aside from the embellishments on the trenchcoat, Paul looks extremely normal. Meanwhile, JC sticks out quite a lot.

The boots were fully improvised. I had no clue what was going on in the texture and couldn't find a reference I liked.

Headcanon name for him is James Chris because I like how it sounds. :) I only remembered that James Bond exists AFTER I thought of it and couldn't find a name I liked better.

Drawn at approximately 5'11.

FOR JC (FEMALE)

Drew her shortly after I played the Lay D. Denton mod for the first time. I was so inspired that I *had* to make my own design for her. I love the idea of a female JC.

I did take some liberties from the mod's design, though. I returned her widow's peak, for one. One of the odd tidbits I remember from biology class was that widow's peaks are a dominant genetic trait, so even if she *wasn't* a clone of Paul, the chances of her having one would still be 50% at minimum. As for her hairstyle overall, I thought I'd let it be loose but still slicked back- reminiscent of her male counterpart. JC struck me as the type to keep her hair short rather than put it into a bun or ponytail. More convenient overall. Not a buzz cut- since male JC didn't get one either- but still above the shoulders.

I also removed the nail polish. It's an idea I love for a secret agent of her type, but I just don't get the idea that she'd wear it from her personality (+ refer to the bit about JC's 'tactical look'). It would suit someone like Navarre better in my opinon, showing efficiency in her job- that she's so good she wouldn't need to worry about chipping a nail as well as the fact that she has time to re-paint them. Unfortunately, Navarre has cybernetic arms. Maybe she can paint her nails anyways- don't know.

Ditto for the lipstick.

I removed the stiletto heel- though that's not the fault of the mod. They had to use a generic model & re-texture it for her design, after all. I did, however, let her have about a ~2 inch heel. Nothing *too* obscene. More of just a reference.

The vest is modeled on one I saw online that I liked the look of.

Headcanon name for her is Joan because I've loved the name 'Joan' as long as I've been listening to Joan Jett's music. Kept Chris because I like the sound of it as a gender neutral name.

Drawn at approximately 5'6, with 2 inch heels to make her 5'8.

FOR ALEX:

Hers is somewhat of a story.

I was considering making this into a full Denton lineup- as I now have- but thought it would be incomplete without Alex. Issue is that I don't especially like Alex's design all that much, male OR female, but female especially. That's when I thought to redesign her. Side note, I went w/ female Alex because I liked the voice performance better + I just like the idea :)

It spiraled from there, starting as a design more consistent with the other Dentons (one of the gripes I have w/ the original design), into a rewrite. So I wouldn't say that this is by *any* means the same Alex as Invisible War.

Given that it's relevant to the design, the premise is as follows; rather than being Alex 20 years in the future, this Alex would instead be the one found in Area 51, the one who was retconned out of the story. The intention behind that setpiece in the level always interested me a lot, whether or not it was later retconned. The idea of accelerated clone growth + memory implantation also caught my eye, and I wanted to use her to explore all of those things a little more. Therefore, that would be her function. The Dentons are prototypes, after all. She exists in an alternate world, a take on the scrapped UNATCO route everyone wonders about, though it would differ in the sense that it only happens if JC fails the Lebedev mission. Paul goes fully MIA, and Alex is deployed early to fill the empty space. Without having led a full life & full outside control over her memories, she'd be a complete UNATCO zealot; what MJ12 wanted JC to be. There's more detail than that, but that's about what's necessary for the design to make sense.

It's a blend of the other Dentons & prominent UNATCO figures. She has the same physical features as her siblings- same face, same approximate build, same nanoaugmentations, so on. Her clothes, however, are meant to resemble the mech-augs more than it does the Dentons. Where the Dentons wear looser clothing, Alex's is more form fitting, akin to Anna Navarre & Gunther, even if she has no cybernetic joints that loose fabric could get caught in. It's meant to reinforce the idea of her loyalty to UNATCO rather than anything else.

The jacket is meant to resemble the Dentons, however. Even then, it's cropped because she wouldn't necessarily be a "full" Denton (for lack of a better term) or share a true connection with them beyond genetics.

As for color scheme, it follows that pattern. She relies on a black base more than her siblings do, again akin to the mech-augs. The prominent blue is meant to be similar to JC's, but it's also worth mentioning that JC and Paul (Paul especially) have much more of a green tint than what I selected for her. Alex's is more metallic, once again to mimic Navarre & Gunther. Still, she is a Denton, fully manufactured or not, so the blue of her design is meant to be more prominent & full than it is with the mech-augs.

The hair gave me some trouble. It's meant to be the same-ish style as the Alex of Invisible War, but I'm ngl I was struggling to draw it. I had also wanted to give her some kind of facial accessory- Paul has a beard, JC has his sunglasses, but I couldn't find something for Alex. I didn't like the look of a facemask or gasmask- I also considered goggles, but they would be too reminiscent of JC's shades while also being made redundant by her augmentations. In the end, I left her face as-is.

Drawn at approximately 5'6, with 1 inch heels to make her 5'7.

Anyways, I made an Invisible War version of the lineup too for fun, and because I wanted to see what the Alex design would look like with the original purple look. :)

isn't character design fun

#deus ex #dx1 #jc denton #paul denton #alex denton #maybe #kind of a redesign #and kind of a rewrite #so maybe it counts more as oc #i dunno really lol #some design analysis? perhaps?#god i love talking color schemes lol

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liffy-feelin-jiffy · 1 year ago

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Coroika Gorai headcanons

Rider had typically been more closed off about his sexuality, for reasons he decided to keep to himself as they mostly originate from insecurities, but also because he actually hadn’t known he genuinely likes guys the way he thought he liked girls for the longest time in his life. It wasn’t until he was 15 in a half, and having gotten to know Goggles a lot more at the time did he realize that he likes guys in more ways he initially thought he did. It didn’t help when the devastating realization came to him that he had a crush on a specific blue idiot boy… a hard crush as a matter of fact. Like, I’m talking head over heels kind of stuff, Spiderverse Gwen syndrome. Mans is tripping on his own feet because he can’t stop thinking about that scatterbrain for the life of him. Goggles is in every corner of his mind, he’s in the reflections in the windows of the subway, his bubbly laughs can be heard through the soft breeze like bird song. Rider always looks at the Pilot Goggled buffoon’s empty hands, willing everything in himself not to take it and intertwine their fingers together like thread sewing fabric, and he clenches his own hands into tight fists whenever he’s away from him and the thought of hand holding comes to mind. He’s so in love, he wants to kiss that stupid little weirdo’s face it’s making him look like the biggest dumbass that’s ever been born-

Sorry I got a little too into it there I guess. Whether you wanna take all that seriously or not is your choice of poison.

Anyways, yeah, once Rider finds out he’s literally in love with the squid who deadass flashed him to the public during their first match back in the Plaza, it’s not going so well for him. Why in the world would he start getting all blushy and feely for that absolute moron? What possessed him into developing feelings for that over-ecstatic boy with tentacles as blue as the shining sea? With a goofy smile so bright that it rivals the very sun? With such inspiring optimism that Rider can only dream of possessing-

😑

Oh, who was he kidding.

What makes it worse is that his crush on Goggles actually started back when he was teaching blue team how to train to fight against Skull, hence adding onto his seemingly territorial behavior on Gogs when Skull eagerly said he wanted to fight team blue again. Jealous much? Lmao. It gets even funnier when he and Goggles both end up crushing on Skull too BAHAHA (I believe in fixing love triangles/squares with the power of POLYAMOROUS RELATIONSHIPS. SKULLAMIGORAI FOR LIFE✊🏻✊🏻✊🏻✊🏻)

For the longest time he tried to repel what he considered were “intrusive thoughts” of Goggles. He’d try gaslighting himself that he’s someone Goggles would never find that kind of interest in; maybe he already has someone else, like a guy or girl, he’s bi after all, isn’t he? He and Goggles would never work anyways, Rider’s personality was too serious to match with Goggle’s boisterous and colorful character even though he’d be willing to undergo any more bullsquit imaginable if it meant he’d get to spend the rest of his days with the blue buffoon. He doesn’t see him that way, they wouldn’t mesh well together, Goggles deserved to have someone nicer than he was, etc.

This kept going on for a little while, until eventually Aloha finds out—it’s a long story—and accidentally rats Rider out to his sister and momma—that’s an even longer story, and they both enthusiastically try to coerce him into confessing from there.

Aloha: “You should write him a song and play it for him-!”

Rider: “Bitch heeeeell no”

Rider’s mom: “why not make him something? Like bake a cake or a pie for him as a gift”

Rider: “did you forget what happened last time? what happened to having me banned from using the oven???”

This was all meanwhile Goggles was actually having a secondary crisis of his own. Not the extent Rider had, but all through the Turf War and Ranked Battle Tournaments to his journey with Sheldon to find the treasure, he’d been quite distracted needless to say.

Compared to Rider, Goggles was plenty more laid back and wasn’t shy about his sexuality, though he didn’t ever tell anyone his sexual/romantic orientation that much, so it lead to everyone believing that he was a gay squiddo—though he was really bi and had an equal preference for both boys and girls. There’s still not a lot of people who know he’s bi because he never tells anybody, and if he ever does it would be like discovering rare dialogue in a video game. Even though he has little interest in pursuing a love life, he still kinda had some hope in finding that special someone that he would get to spend the rest of his life with. He tried one time with a girl back in Inkopolis plaza (before the events of the manga) but it ended kinda rocky and he kinda tried to distance himself from relationships for a while until he moved on and kinda just went like “if it happens, it happens.”

Again, his crush was more mellow compared to Rider’s, or at least it started out mellow before eventually growing into a deep sweet longing for his companionship. Goggle’s crush started off typical, thinking that Rider was all handsome, strong, total dreamboat kinda guy. After they’d gotten to know each other some more, and upon moving to the Square did Goggles really have a thing for him. Even the rest of the blue team began to notice. His interest in him peaked when Rider stopped him before his battle against Team Emperor and told him “watch the next semi finals match closely. Because you’re gonna be facing against me in the finals.”

Can you tell that these are my favorite panels because ho mine gosh

Goggles wasn’t as insecure as Rider was in terms of self esteem, but he also came up with the thoughts that Rider wouldn’t see him like that, too. He even worried that Rider would’ve been disgusted if he told him 😭. He wanted to at least keep their friendship together so he was just like “I like you a lot and I admire you to no end but I understand that it may never really come to that so I’ll just support you and admire you for all your grace from afar. 😁”

Hope you enjoyed this cuz now I’m eepy and I’m gonna take a nap. I’ve got college now and I didn’t get enough sleep last night because my adhd will never love me.

(Edited a few things in here. Hope you like the changes better!)

#gorai #goggles x rider #coroika #coroika headcanons #Splatoon #splatoon manga #splatoon headcanon #goggles coroika #rider coroika #aloha coroika #S4 coroika

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trashcanwithsprinkles · 11 months ago

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God I’m losing my mind this is so funny to me Akskdkkfkf. Ajax gets his own funky abode and it’s just for his shenanigans of tracking everything in a bunch of different nations. Would he encourage Changshang the snake and track the various doctors she made her contracts with? Would he arrange for an even earlier partnership of merchants between Mondstadt and Liyue to support the winery? The Feiyun commerce guild getting a fun start. I’m just- there’s so many things Childe can do here. And the idea of him being so excited to meet someone who, by all means, should be just some guy? When he’s at that point an ancient god? It makes it even funnier. Catch the god of annihilation bouncing on the balls of his feet and grinning because he gets to try Changlings food.

Also I’d love to see the kinds of parties he’d throw because one of his blorbos appeared. It sounds like it would be fun, but also so confusing for literally everyone else

it is very funny hahah childe would have a really like- down period of time right after the whole celestia situation is resolved, where he'd mope around saying he has nothing to do. but then seemingly out of nowhere he'd be right back on track, doing stuff, planning things, and guizhong and morax would just stand there in silence and confusion. it'd be so funny,,

wanmin would absolutely get the wangsheng treatment. spot reserved in chihu rock and everything.

the more i think about it tho, the more he wouldn't throw parties per se. more like............ you'd find him giddy and trying to hold in the excitement like some sort of schoolgirl and then catch him going "only twenty so years now" like he'd celebrate the birth of the blorbos and then eagerly await the point where they're at about the age they are in-game to fully like- go and hound them. god there would be such chaos on the years leading up to the events in-game, given most of the characters are all around the same age range (40-18)

#this would be such a mess but it would be so fun #the connundrum of boredom from immortality resolved #at least until genshin-time

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callsigndragon · 2 years ago

Text

Tasting the Ashes | Ch. 26: Sweet Angel ✍️

Word count: 2.7k

Warnings: pergnancy stuff is over bc the BABIES ARE BORN, sad stuff, lots of tears, Mav and Goose have a fight, and... something we've been all waiting for!

A/N: THE BABIES ARE HERE AAAAAAAAA

Watching Rooster running around the room like a headless chicken would have been funnier if you weren't in so much pain. C-section was scheduled for tomorrow, but apparently, the Bradshaw-Mitchell twins couldn't wait a minute longer.

Carole and JJ Bradshaw-Mitchell are born after an emergency C-section in which Bradley grabbed your hand at every turn. They have their father's eyes, and Bradley cries when you mention it. While the babies rest on your chest, he kisses your forehead, thanking you over and over again for 'making him the happiest man on Earth'.

That makes you cry. You can't understand completely what it means to have a father as a kid because you never had one. The twins won't have to go through that. They'll be surrounded by love and family.

Once you're in your room, watching Bradley be completely enamored with his baby girl while JJ sleeps in your arms, you hear a soft knock on the door. There, with a big bouquet of sunflowers, is Jake. Maverick is right behind, fighting with Goose to see who gets to hold the babies first. You shake your head, chuckling at the two grownups that look like kids.

"Oh, dear, they're here. They're truly here!" Jake mutters softly, his eyes darting from one twin to another. He snorts once he sees the pink bundle in Bradley's arms. "Man, you can't have favorites already."

"I don't have a favorite, JJ is a mommy's boy, and I can't even hold him. He starts crying." Rooster pouts, looking at his baby boy.

"I would cry too if I had to look at that face." Goose says as he stands next to your bed, caressing JJ's cheek with his finger. "Congrats, little Mav."

You smile at the nickname, grabbing his hand and squeezing it tightly. "Thank you, Goose."

Maverick looks at Carole, Bradley offering to hold her, but he refuses. You frown. "Why don't you want to hold your granddaughter?"

"I want to but… I don't know if I should."

Bradley looks at him, a frown of his own. "Why would you say that?"

"What, Mav, scared of betraying another Bradshaw?" Goose quips, but you know that it's not just a joke. The tone he uses, harsh and blunt, denotes that he means every word.

"I didn't betray any Bradshaw." Maverick defends himself, moving closer to Goose.

"You betrayed me, the first Bradshaw. You betrayed my son, that's two Bradshaws. And I'm completely sure that if Carole were alive, he would have felt betrayed as well." Goose remarks the last words by pressing a finger on Mav's chest. You look at Jake, silently asking for help. He nods, stepping between the two men.

"Okay, buddies, it's time to stop."

"No, I think it's time to end this, because I'm honestly tired of being looked at as a traitor." Mav moves Jake away, standing in front of Goose with fire burning in his eyes. "Your wife asked me to pull his papers, Nick. It was her last wish. And she asked me to do it because she knew that none of you would listen to her. I tried to refuse because Bradley is my godson, how could I do that to him? But Carole insisted and used the 'I'm dying' card…"

Silence falls in the room, not a breath can be heard. Bradley and Nick exchange glances; the first has tears in his eyes; the second, you can't tell because you can only see his back.

"How can I know that you're telling the truth?" Goose mutters, his tone softer than before.

Maverick grabs an envelope from his jacket, which is yellow due to the passing of the years. It says "Maverick" in beautiful handwriting. "I came here to give this to Bradley and to apologize. He's not only my godson, he's the father of my grandkids, and I owe him the truth." He gives the envelope to Goose and sits on the bed. "But you should read it first."

You grab Mav's hand, and he gives you a sad smile and a wink, but doesn't let go of your hand.

"This is… the letter she left for you after she died." Goose recognizes the envelope. He was the one who bought them for her when she asked to write letters.

"Can you read it aloud, dad?"

Goose nods at his son's words and clears his throat before starting to read.

Dear Pete,

I know that I asked too much of you, but it's the only thing I've ever asked for. You know better than anyone how painful it was to see Goose lying on that hospital bed after your accident. I can't leave this life knowing that my son, my dear and sweet Bradley, will be facing the same dangerous situations, if not worse, just because I couldn't stop him.

And I know his dad will never do it, that's why I asked you. I need you to stop Bradley from becoming an aviator. I don't know how you're gonna do it, I just want to rest and be sure that my kid is not gonna crash and burn before he turns 40. I want him to live a long life, fall in love, marry, and have kids. Watch them grow up and go to school, and teach them how to tie their shoelaces and make cookies, even though Bradley doesn't know how to cook. I hope he learns, though. He's gonna starve.

I'll be praying that this last wish I make won't bring you problems with my boys. I know they're a bit temperamental, but you three are a family, and families stick together in the worst moments.

I hope you two will always be together.

Take care, Mav.

Love,

Carole.

"Who's gonna tell Carole that you had kids before marriage?" Goose cracks a joke while wiping away tears and holding the letter close to his heart.

Bradley chuckles, wiping his face with the sleeves of his black hoodie. "She would have a heart attack."

Goose takes a deep breath and turns around to look at Maverick. "Get up."

"If you're gonna punch me, please don't do it in front of the kids." Mav says, but instead of getting punched, he gets a big, heartfelt hug from the wizzo.

"You didn't have to wait all these years to tell me that you were honoring my wife's dying wish." Goose pats Mav's back, and for the first time in months, you see something that you have never seen.

You see Mav break down. He finally allows himself to be free from the burden that latched onto his heart and wouldn't allow him to breathe.

Jake steps in front of Bradley, taking baby Carole from his arms and nodding to Mav. "They need you."

Bradley nods and hugs the two men, crying like he did when he realized his babies had his eyes. These three men finally had the closure that they deserved.

Jake sits next to you on the bed, playing with Carole’s fingers. "Thank you."

You look at him, not understanding why he's thanking you. "Why?"

"If you hadn't appeared in Bradley's life… this wouldn't be happening. He wouldn't be a dad, Goose and Mav would be arguing still… You and the babies have fixed this family."

The three men turn to look at you, smiling. "We have to tell you something."

Mav's words make you panic a bit. "Please, no more family secrets. I think this one has had its fair share of secrets for a lifetime."

"We've changed your call sign. Officially." Bradley says, tilting his head while showing you that cute, teasing smile of his. "Because you don't deserve to have a call sign that triggers such bad memories."

"Do they know…?"

"No. That's something you have to share, if you ever want to. Not my story to tell, babe." He then grabs the patch that Goose has in his pocket.

'Hen Mitchell'

"So now I'm Hen?"

"Of course, you have to fit in with the Birdshaws." Bradley states, and you snort.

"Did you just change Bradshaw for Birdshaw-"

"I will deny it."

"How unfortunate, because I have recorded everything." Jake singsongs, showing his phone.

“Please, send me that. I need to have blackmail material to show his kids when they grow up.” Mav says, finally holding Carole in his arms. He feels worthy of holding her now, it seems.

“The kids don’t even have a day!”

“Well, they’re gonna grow up, eventually.” Goose adds, partnering with Mav once again on his mischievous adventures.

“Goose, we need to get them flying suits!”

“Do they make it in such small sizes?” Goose questions, holding JJ in his arms.

Bradley, Jake, and you watch the two aviators holding their grandchildren in their arms. A new generation of Bradshaws and Mitchells.

“Jake, are you taking pictures?”

“Lots of them.”

“Oh, shit.” Goose mumbles. “I have something for you, little Mav.”

“For me?”

Goose hands you a yellow envelope similar to the one Maverick just pulled out. “Carole wrote this for… Bradley’s future wife. She wrote a lot of letters for her and gave them to me so I could give them to her on very special occasions. The day after he proposed, the wedding day, the arrival of the first child... I think you deserve to know a bit more about the woman who raised Bradley.”

He gives you the letter, and you look at Bradley, who shrugs. “I don’t know anything about this, Hen.”

You open the envelope and read the letter. The first line always makes you cry. Was it intentional? Did Carole know that somehow you’d end up being called like that? Life works in mysterious ways.

Dear Mother Hen,

I know, I know. This is an emotional day. Lots of things are happening and it seems like you’re not going to be able to handle everything but let me assure you something: if you got so far, that means you can handle this and more. After all, you have to be a strong woman if you had married my son.

Her words make your heart hurt. What would she think if she found out that her son had kids without being married? Would she be mad? Would she be disappointed? It’s hard to know, you only know her for the things that Mav, Goose and Bradley have been telling you. How she was the prettiest girl wherever she went, how she dressed like a movie star, how she loved to dance and sing and take pictures with her husband’s Polaroid camera. She was an angel.

What matters now is that you remember this: you are not alone. You have him, you have my husband, and you have Mav, who will offer to babysit whenever you want him to. He loves to take naps with the babies. You should see the number of pictures we have of him napping with baby Bradley in his arms.

You have a family, sweetheart. It’s impossible for me to know your backstory, if you have a good family of your own, or if you are alone in the world, but since the moment this baby (or babies, knowing my family, you could have twins) is born, you won’t ever be alone. You have a little kid who will love you forever, unconditionally, and without any reserve. The kid, and the father, will be with you. Always. Never forget that.

This is the beginning of your family. Family is not the one you’re born with, but the one you choose. You chose Bradley. And now you have a baby. I know there’s gonna be more in the future. It’s hard to resist a Bradshaw man with a baby. Baby fever kicks in every time. It’s a shame I never got the chance to have more babies. Poor Bradley grew up as an only child.

Well, my love. I have to go. This is the last letter I’m writing for you. I’ve been with you in all the important events, but it’s time for you to fly on your own. I could give you a thousand tips on how to raise your kid, but I’m sure times have changed and nothing I’d say will be useful anymore.

Remember you are not alone. You have a family.

Rely on them. Let them help you.

Lots of love,

You mother-in-law.

“Hey, hey, sweets, why are you crying?” Bradley hugs you close, careful to not hurt you or pull a stitch from your belly.

Carole’s words have finally made you realizethat you’re not alone. You’ve never been. You have had Red since way back. You had Mav since the moment you walked in the Hard Deck all those months ago. You have Jake, since that morning he told you that he would be your brother. And, more importantly, you have had Bradley since the moment you saw him. You know that he will always be there for you, to help you and to make every step of this journey a lot easier.

But also, you had the wizzos, Jesse, Mickey and Bob who had been there whenever you needed to laugh or to rant about Bradley being too overprotective and not letting you get up from bed for the past month.

You also had the girls, those insane, crazy, and lovely women who had been giving you the best maternity advice ever, who had been there every time your hormones took the best out of you, and made you cry for hours.

You had a family way before the kids were born. It just took you a while to realize. And as Carole said, family helps you when you need them the most. You can rely on them.

You need to rely on them. Now. Before this situation gets worse.

“I-I have to tell you something.” You confess, holding to his arm for dear life.

“We’ll be outside.” Jake gets up from the bed, ready to exit the room, but you hold his arm.

“I need to talk to all of you. Please. You’re my family.”

Mav and Jake, who had been waiting for you to say that since God knows when, sit next to you on the bed. “What is it, sweetheart?”

Mav’s chest swells with pride when you call him dad, and he’s ready to fight whoever is hurting his daughter.

“Dad… There's this girl who believes I murdered her brother."

“Wait, you said abuser?” Jake looks at you, holding your hands. “We’re gonna need to hear the whole story.”

“Wait, you mean… Steve’s sister?” Bradley asks you and when you nod, he tightens his jaw. "So you had to put up with your ex being a fucking abuser, and now you have to deal with the psycho sister?"

You take a deep breath. “You’re not gonna like this.”

You tell them the story, watching as their faces go from pure terror to straight up anger. They’re ready to protect you from that girl. Whatever it takes.

“Nobody is gonna hurt you here, little Mav. We’re not gonna let that happen.”

“You only focus on resting now, okay? Leave it to us. We'll come up with something." Jake assures you before kissing your forehead and leaving the room, followed by Goose and Mav. Once he’s in front of the elevator, he turns around and looks at the older men. “We need to do something.”

“Yeah but… we cannot go find that girl and… threaten her. I mean, she could sue us or something.” Mav retorts, pressing the button to call the elevator.

“Well, we can’t. But I know someone who can. And you don’t want to make her angry.”

“Who is it?”

“My wife.”

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