#it's 2am and I'm on tumblr instead of sleeping

[echodrops]

Every time I think I've decided on what part of Endwalker most made my writer's nose wrinkle, I remember something else the story needed and didn't include.

Tonight's contender: Literally every single piece was in place to perfectly cast the WoL and Hydaelyn fight as deeply personal and relatable symbolism for a mother teaching her child to stand on his own, or for a parent letting go, trusting her young one can now walk his own path--the bittersweetness of knowing you will never again be needed in the way you were before, or even the joy of a student surpassing his teacher, the pride of watching one who once followed become one who leads... Instead the focus we got was much closer to the far more generic RPG trope of "I will test your readiness and resolve."

It was unnecessary! She knew! She knew how far we would go--across eons of time itself--to save the world!

Why not let us, let our WoL, love this person for her flaws, for her choices which made us? Why not let us love her as a kindred spirit, one Azem to another, full of unerring joy for the world and an unwillingness to accept without answers?

It was all perfectly lined up, all there waiting in the subtext, and then just left uncommented upon. There's something to be said for subtlety, sure, but this isn't a place it would be needed...

(All this just goes back to the core issue of Endwalker which is that every single element of the story hinges on the concept of legacy--Zodiark vs. Hydaelyn as the remains of the Ancients' moral disagreement, Fandaniel's refusal to accept death as a beautiful end, Amon's attempt to embrace Xande's choosing oblivion, Zenos inheriting the war machine of Garlemald and enacting its own legacy upon it, Vrtra's fear of history repeating--and yet the story never manages to properly wind all those disparate threads into one stronger weave. They all just exist, heading in the same direction but never properly tied together for the player. Venat's message to the Ancients was that they could not cling to the past--but Hydaelyn's power was stasis because she herself was the past that the WoL could no longer cling to, the mother, the mentor whom we had to reach beyond to shape a legacy of our own choosing. Whyyyyy Square, why not just do a little more of this work for the player--)

[airenyah]

god i have so many our skyy posts in my likes to catch up on but no time. why just why did the special have to drop right before the deadline of the early feedback and when i have theater rehearsals every day 😩😩😩

[anotherandomcollection]

Perhaps in another life...

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≻─ ⋆✩ pairings: mavuika x fem!reader (can be read as gn!reader) ≻─ ⋆✩ warnings: some kind of fluff?, angst! - not beta read. probably ooc mavuika so... sorry in advance ≻─ ⋆✩ spoilers?: 5.0 Archon Quest (Act I & II) ≻─ ⋆✩ author's note: idk I feel like writing some angst so I may as well try with a new little idea I had... I also wrote this at like 2am with a sudden rush of inspiration...

I haven't written in a while and I'm completely new to this, I have never written on tumblr so forgive my formatting please. I don't know how to feel about this

≻─ ⋆✩ word count: 1.6K

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The traveler says nothing as they observe the Pyro archons family portrait, one that had been painted to her family's likeness. Apart from her parents and her sister, there had been someone else, clearly bearing no resemblance to any of the family, this someone had their arms linked around the archon - everyone smiling. The traveler notes how the archon can't seem to tear her gaze away from the portrait, before she snaps back to the situation at hand. Her eyes drift back to the image during their conversation and they wonder just how long the archon's duties had kept this archon away from her family. The answer was too long - longer than what the traveler had ever imagined.

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The day your love officially decides to sacrifice herself, was one you already knew was coming. There had been discussions for long before it had been finalised and you were just hoping that your darling wife could let a different archon do this... It's not like Natlan lacked in archons, with the possibility for any human to ascend to the seat. Sure, it was selfish, that much you knew but did she really have to be the one? It hurt to know that Mavuika had to be - to give up her life and return five centuries in the future. Five centuries and without you. And you would live the rest of your life without her.

There had been arguments and heated discussions that ended up resulting in everyone's anger and it helped no one, really. At some point, you had to accept it, before you sent off your love with anger instead of some final memories of love and joy. Her mind was clearly made up, long before the final announcement.

It was hard, of course. Hard to accept because suddenly your wife was a ticking time bomb. A set date and a set time, where she would cease to be with you and then she would be lost. She would die and sure, she would be resurrected later... But not in your life time. She would be gone and you would never see your wife alive again. It had felt almost like a doctor's diagnosis, when they give you a time limit. But at least people still had the hope of fighting off an illness and pushing through. This date was final and it was becoming so very real and closing in so very fast.

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The last of her days were spent easy and quiet. Away from the archon life and responsibilities - Mavuika had already ensured she completed everything before the announcement. She had her last days to be spent, after all.

You'd gone out together with her sister, Hine, travelling around Natlan one last time... There had been time spent curled up together, relishing in each other's warmth once more and the comfort found in each other's arms. Soon, sleep would not come easy for you. Too used to the warmth of your lover.

You'd brought her for a quick visit to Sumeru, though it had been rather uneventful and... A lot of sand. More than you'd ever encountered in Natlan and finer than you'd encountered. Dunes and dunes of sand in every direction and wind that blew the sand everywhere and it had stubbornly clung to everything. You spend time still getting sand out of your clothes and bags long after your darling has passed.

In the nights, quiet words of comfort are exchanged and promises made. Mavuika had already requested her wedding ring be kept somewhere... Somewhere she could find when she inevitably rose once more in the future. You cling to your wife, even in your sleep and you dream of a future that you will never be able to have with her.

At times, it feels like you are grieving the loss before it happens. But how do you not when you know it would happen already?

No matter how much fun and laughter is spent together in each day. No matter the soft kisses and tender touches... Your wife would die in a matter of days. And you were powerless to stop it.

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"Come on love, its time to get up", She whispers, though she doesn't shake you awake. The sun had long rose and the colours of the sky had shifted from the orange and purple sunrise hues into the bright sky of a new day. You looked ethereal - the sunlight catching in your hair and sprawled across the pillows. And so at peace, without the weight of a hidden grief that you carried over the last few weeks.

She supposes it was how you saw her when she set her hair aflame. 'it's beautiful, angelic even...', you'd told her once. If she brought up the comparison you would probably laugh. Something about how the sunlight in your hair could not compare to an archon's beauty. Her beauty. But still she watches as the sun dances across your skin with a wonderful glow.

"We don't have anything on today.", Is the only response she gets, your voice laced with sleep, before you bury your face into her neck, turning away from the sun's glare. You can feel her laughter as she runs her fingers through your hair and you are lulled back to sleep with the rhythmic and soothing quality of it. When you wake later, you find yourself still tangled with your wife and she too had been dragged back to the land of dreams.

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The day comes and... The moment your wife gives you the last kiss, last hug and last touch... It passed numbly. She hugs her family goodbye, final words are exchanged... and then she's gone. You had not been allowed to witness the actual sacrifice and you did not want to either ways. The feeling remains numb until it's night time and you're alone. Alone for the first time in... Years. Since you had married, she had always been home for bed, curling up together and relishing in the warmth that radiated through the house. Warmth of the person, in both the figurative and literal sense... And it was gone.

The dam breaks and you cry yourself to sleep. You wake exhausted, despite the full night of rest and it is painful. You force yourself to go about your day and life continues on.

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It hurts even more, when Hine, still young and perhaps she had not quite grasped the meaning of gone. She's inconsolable at first, but soon gains a kind of fire in her, insistent that there's some way of seeing her sister again in the future. Her determination would have been adorable, if you weren't already aware that living that long was impossible and just barely coping with your grief. And unlike your wife (ex...wife? No, she was your wife even if she had passed.) no one else really had that 'wayob ordained purpose' to rise again and protect Natlan from destruction so far into the future.

Five centuries was almost unfathomable to you. No one, short of gods and perhaps the Adepti you hear about in stories from Liyue could live that long. But you were no such mythical beast nor were you a god. You were as human as they got and so was Hine.

Regardless, you force a kind smile as you work together to theorise ways to live that long. To see her sister again and to see your wife again. It's not possible, you already know, and you hoped that her sister would see it before she was too far gone in her aspirations for the far future. She does, eventually, almost a full year later when the passion mellow and it finally hits that she's gone. You hold each other as you both cry and mourn the loss of a loved one.

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Five centuries later and Mavuika rises once more. She finds the wedding ring that she painstakingly stored and had a family portrait made. Painted onto her father's old armour, she describes her family to the best of her ability and she almost weeps at the likeness that the artist manages to capture.

She cannot mourn now, not really. She already accepted her fate in the centuries before and she knew what she was giving up. But if not her, then who? She had a duty to her nation. The grief hits her in the quiet hours of the night when she isn't the Pyro archon of Natlan but just Mavuika . No one fights alone - but why did she feel like this was a battle she was oh no lonely in. So far into the future and so much has changed since the past.

Unfortunately, little survives five centuries of erosion. She doesn't know exactly of what happens to her family. Her sister... Has some records and she pieces together that her younger sister managed to be an architect. Playing a major role in rebuilding the Scions of the Canopy.

But you... Some evidence points to you also became an architect alongside her sister. Helping to rebuild and design the children of the Echoes. Some say you died young, a mysterious disease that compromised your immune systems. Others say you eventually left Natlan to a different nation, which one is unclear but you never returned until much later in life. But all records are alike in stating that you never remarried and never took on another love.

And so Mavuika sits alone and she prays (to who? to who does an archon pray to?) that in the end, her sacrifice is worth it. That giving up everything had been worth it. And she hopes, so desperately that when her (second) human life expires, she can see you again.

[xinnatrin]

As an Anarchist, I do not have a hierarchy of needs, all my needs and desires are horizontally organized which is why I'm dehydrated and browsing tumblr at 2am right now instead of going to sleep. Viva la revolution.

[penguicorns-are-cool]

Sleep Tax

so I've been thinking about something and I'm gonna call it sleep tax

basically, because of my ADHD I need a bit of extra time to get ready in the morning, but also the earlier I wake up the more time I need cause I'm also dealing with sleep deprivation.

So like, if I need to leave home at 8:30 I need to fully wake up by 7:30 so my first alarm has to be at 7:00 so I have time for a few snoozes and an hour to get ready. If I have to leave by 8:00 though I need to wake up fully by 7:00 to even have a chance of getting ready in time and my first alarm has to be around 6:20.

And it gets worse if it's cold cause now there's the extra step of forcing myself into the cold and the cold makes everything else harder to do. So now I have to wake up like 15 minutes earlier to give myself time for that but really my first alarm is way before that so I can have proper snoozing time. Like, Now to leave at 8:30 I have to fully wake up around 7:15 or earlier and my first alarm will be at 6:30.

Now, if waking up this early makes me sleep deprived for whatever reason. Like maybe I had a lot of work the night before, or I had a bad day and ended up staying up late on Tumblr trying to decompress to the point that I could get to sleep, or I just couldn't sleep. Then it'll start a cycle of not so great energy-sapping days where it's hard to sleep and I consistently get to bed closer to 1-2am. Now I'm getting like 6 or less hours of sleep a night and am getting very sleep-deprived so getting ready is even slower. Now I have to wake up even earlier to compensate for that. My first alarm now is at 6:20 (or earlier) so I can wake up at 7:00

And if I have to wake up earlier when I'm already waking up at 7:00 and have to leave around 8:00 instead of 8:30, well I just kind of die cause now I'm waking up at 6:45 with my first alarm at 6:00 or 5:55 all while getting less than 5 hours of sleep a night

So now I'm in this horrible cycle of getting more and more sleep deprived because the sleep deprivation and other stuff makes it harder and harder to get ready so I have to wake up earlier and earlier which makes my days more and more energy-sapping which means I stay up later and I get more sleep-deprived and I'm even slower getting ready and have to wake up earlier and on and on and on

[midstpodcast]

It is 2am where I am, instead of sleeping I apparently instead am curious to know how if the narrators are characters themselves? Like I know you all have your own characters you play, but are the narrators their own characters in the midst universe, (like will you reveal the three of you are terror affected natives who are now cursed with the knowledge and job of telling this story or something like that?) or are you simply just omnipotent rascally (is that a word? Sure is now I guess) storytellers? I hope that questions makes a modicum of sense to more cohesive brains than mine right now

🎷: Howdy, night-owl! It's getting late where I am, too, and I'm closing out today's AMA with one more answer to this excellent late-night question. Thanks to you all for tuning in and for a day full of fantastic Q&As! There were many great questions we didn’t have time to answer here, but we also answer questions in Midst Messages, a bonus show for subscribers on Midst.co. So there are still chances we can get to your inquiries there or back here on Tumblr if we do future AMAs.

To your narrator question: I can't comment on the true in-universe identity of the narrators (if indeed they have one), but I will say this: whoever the narrators are, they’re characters unlike any we’ve ever played, with levels of meta complexity that we can barely begin to unravel for you. And the experience of both BEING and NOT BEING those three entities within Midst has become one of the most interesting and surreal journeys of our lives. There’s no narration if there are no ears to hear it, and we want to say THANK YOU for listening to Midst. Thanks for coming with us. Thank you for being part of this whole weird wild thing. There’s more to the story, and we’re SO EXCITED to open the door to the final chapter of Midst for you tomorrow.

Xen signing off for now. See you all tomorrow in season 3! 🎷🧡

[theabyssinyourcloset]

Idk why I'm here rn. It's 2am and i should be sleeping but instead i'm just scrolling through tumblr.

Here, have a shark gif. Just cause it's cute. Sharks are cute and they deserve so much better

[ladymirdan]

As someone who just reblogs posts without saying anything, the reason I don't say anything when I reblog them is because one part, I often have nothing to say. And the other part is that most of the time when I comment on a post by reblogging it, the original poster never sees it or interacts with it. I feel like I'm screaming into the void, too.

I'm not trying to call anyone out, I'm not trying to shame anyone. Your point is still valid--it is 100% reasonable for you to feel the way you feel. I'm just providing my excuse for why I don't generally leave comments on your posts or on your blog. I'm pretty new to the fandom and pretty low on the fandom totem ladder, I think I'm one step up from an unknown. I don't get interaction most months, either, and I know that my interacting with anyone doesn't count for anything.

You are not under any obligation to interact with everyone who reblogs your posts with comments. I am not saying that you have to interact with me or that you're under some obligation. You are a popular member of the Tumblr 40k fandom with a lot of followers, I am one scream in the darkness. This is just me explaining why I just stalk your blog (do we still say that? We did back in 2012...) instead of talking to you. Also, I think our interests in the fandom are very different? But I love watching your enthusiasm, seeing your takes. I feel like I'm watching a Very Important Scholar dispensing wisdom in the public forum. (I won't even leave likes on peoples' posts because of what you and Tage have said about the likes! And now that I finally have a post that got popular, I kind of get that???? Sucks that it's not a post of literally any of my art, none of my drawings or writing, just a stupid picture I took where I tagged someone Very Important in the fandom without their permission, very rude of me...) Anyway, it's like, 2am here and I didn't get much sleep.

Pre-emptive sorry for wasting your time!

No no! My post wasn't a callout to anyone specific. And You reblog a lot of my stuff on here and I appreciate it a lot 💙 (I am also a notorious no comment reblogger a lot of the time 😅)

Reblogging on Tumblr makes me happy. It reaches new people with new perspectives and im still allowed to see the interactions. What I ment was taking the post offsite, to a discord or telegram or whatever where im not a part of the post anymore.

And second of all, you aren't a nobody. There are no hierarchy in fandom, (and anyone who says they are some kind of higher tier is a bit of a cunt imo) I value a good commenter/reblogger the same as a would an artist or writer.

But this is a good response, it clears the air a bit I think. I know I might look and sound scary from afar, but I'm (kind of?) nice. And I don't bite(impossible through the screen, I've tried). Lurking used to and still is encouraged way too much in my opinion.

And to you, and anyone who reads this thinking they are nobodies. That is not true. I was a nobody to Tage when we started talking, and now we (at least from my side) are really good friends, almost more then my afk friends.

It is always ok to comment on my posts, everything from “you are wrong and this is why *proceeds to write a 20page rant* to “I want to eat this post so I can carry it inside me” makes me smile.

(I have one rule tho; No unwarranted bashing of Abaddon, that leads to an insta block)

[malverav]

beasts of the briar: 2 books in 9 hours and absolutely all of mega rambly stream of consciousness thoughts about beasts and i shill for garth nix, not for the last time

So i started reading book 1 at 2am as an insomnia read, because once my insomnia hits, it stays, and i'm awake until bedtime tomorrow (thanks vyvanse!). Wanted easier than my recent bedtime reading, a small town in germany by john le carre. It's dense and i read the looking glass war right before it, which was clever but a slow burning, subtle novel. i was in the mood for something lighter, and was thinking about trying to read more sarah j maas (i read acotar in 2022 and hated it. I'm giving the next one a fair crack once my reservation comes in, but it was just so... not fun? Not boring but really dry). I have a fairytale themed market coming in march, know fey are big, but haven't been keeping up with popular fey lit At All so if i want to make fanart to get people to look at my stall, it should probably be a throne of x an y?

ANYWAY

(also don't follow me please if you want like, uncritical take or breathless praise of a series/author (unless it's garth nix, we stan nix on this blog). i'm not attacking you personally if you love it, but i'm over 25 and this is my tumblr blog where i have my opinions. peace)

also im spoiling stuff if you care about that

My friend recced beasts of the briar as totally unconsciousness madness with a plot as subtle as a sledgehammer, so obviously i'm in for it. I'd rather have rubbish someone cooked with pure joy/horny than something boring and technically "good".

Anyway i finished book 2 at about 11am. I'm a fast reader and couldn't sleep, but i like it a lot! I read 2 books in 9 hours! Like let's be real, it is not Classically Good and it definitely reads like fanfic of something else, but it's like, fanfic on a03 in 2010 that's got an air of respectability, it's had a couple of betas and a regular update schedule for a while. You can tell that someone's having a blast writing it. I'm interested to see if they keep the core heat of the dynamic as they start to you know, spoilers, pair people off and solve curses. For me, I feel like the dynamic is starting to cool/stale with Kel/Rose and Farron/Rose. Kel/Ez? *sucking in a breath thru my teeth, leaning back in my chair, white knuckled* anyway Book 2 has barely touched this ship and I'm reading for it. Thank you, EH, for writing this for Me, your horniest nb reader. I appreciate the slow burn while Day/Fare make me roll my eyes so much they roll onto the floor after a while. Don't ever talk about your feelings directly in a romance unless you're forced to. My cardinal sin. Tension evaporates when people therapy talk. Therapy fuck instead, that's how kink works and you get an insight into a character with how they process what scares them into what turns them on this is a post for another time moving on

It's a common issue in romance imo where once the initial tension wears off or breaks, if there's no other "plot" to carry the book it's really hard to keep me hooked. It's best short and sweet, in maybe 20-80k word bursts imo. More than that wordcount I think you need to dream up a plot first and a good romantic dynamic second - most writers (including EH) aren't good enough to carry full novels on characters alone. I can write smoking hot 10k word smut scenes. That's the hard limit for me before I have to start spinning a plot around it, which is so much fucking harder so I absolutely sympathise with the dilemma - if she'd solved the personal issues of the 4 MCs (and +1 secret love interest with Cas, honey, EH, that flower on the ground representing her mate bond with him was so blunt I flinched but you know what I like it anyway because I think you liked too). The plot/worldbuilding is on the thin side, not meaty enough to carry the book all by itself without the romance. There's a huge disparity in stakes with the fate of the Enchanted Vale HANGING in the BALANCE of this ROMANCE and not on the actions of any other character's plots or actions

I think this book reading like fanfic (and let's be real, the trope marketing of these types of books) makes the romantic conclusion generally a sure thing, which takes the air out of any non-romance plot conflict because the characters will solve it with romance. Eg, the bond/mate thing here being the plot answer means that characters who aren't in the main romantic sphere mean very little. So you can kill them as the author because we know they're "safe". . Niamh (queen shit rip miss u already) did nothing meaningful. The side characters (Fare's cool adorable brothers, Rose's dad, Astrid, Marigold (love her tho)) and even the VILLAINS all feel really cardboard because we as the readers know they won't impact the final stakes unless it's to drive our MCs further in love. We know the resoution is that they're all gonna live in a happy polycule and Cas will be fixed with the power of love. But, that means that when you kill Niamh or imprison/defeat uh... Jafar - sorry, evil vizier Perth (reading this book as an Aussie is so fucking funny but that's a separate post ok) it's a bit meaningless. Perversely (hah!) it has a negative impact on the sex, too, because it's too much sweet and not enough vegetables (other plot stuff/character connections). It's like watching a movie that's nonstop action scenes - you feel tired watching it because there's no variety. How many times are Day/Fare/Rose/some combination going to fuck with basically the same beats in the sex scene? Too many. I was getting bored. Sorry.

side note GIIIIIRL PERTH IS VILLAIN QUEER CODED LIKE JAFAR IN A BOOK WITH 4x QUEER MALE MCs I praise EH for the courage to fall back on the classic lazy tropes in book 1 so they can handwave politics and get back to the porn. Shine on.

And the author's game of keep away with the specifics of Kel's vow with Cas, what exactly happened there at the start is wearing preeeeetttttyyy fucking tired. Fucking talk to each other. This stuff only works in a romance with a small cast because there's very few other characters Rose isn't romantically involved with that she can talk to, and fewer still that she's on equal terms with - remember, Astrid and Marigold are servants and serving in Castletree is a big honour, and while they act like the prince's friends/fans let's not forget how some of the pretty boys (Day) kill their own citizens pretty thoughtlessly, so if Astrid was to betray her liege lord's trust and tell Rose (and the reader) the truth, she's risking death by Kel's hand, being banished back to Winter, or having to flee to the Below. And there'd be no concequences for Kel apart from Rose probably having a huff a bout it but getting over it eventually. Not great!

The "oh I can't tell Rose this it's my GREATEST SHAME" is dull after the first two reveals, and I feel like we have more of these to go where she accepts them and heals them because Castletree is a fucking construction site with how Rose is fixing these boys (lame! hate how she's always the damsel/healer/fixer - ez is literally a healer but doesn't fill the healer/heart/gendered female caretaker role in this polycule and i reckon i'd like it a lot better if he did - based on sexual tension with kel and the early line about mummy and daddy fighting, this shit writes itself (ok personal ick to daddy/mummy dynamics but im too genderqueer to not like to fuck with power + gender/roles another post another post omfg)). There's other ways to create tension in a romance, but you need to lean harder into the Other Plot to make it richer. Or have Rose be a Bad Person and be disgusted at what they've done, but imo backstory reveals are boring, tell your story onscreen, coward.

In my opinion. In minecraft. This is longer than I thought. Also for the record! I like this series! I think it's still fun and the narrative voice is cheesy but I really like it, and I'm looking forward to reading more books. Oh, and looking at the community on here, it's been so long since I engaged in a fandom.

Ok last side note I also like how everyone's super normal about everyone being bi/pan, at least in the male MCs. I haven't caught much queer/poly romance elsewhere in other characters - lots of 2 parent households and het monogomous relationships, apart from the random hot fae people of various genders except Rose fuck. No nbs so far but I'm used to not seeing anyone resembling me in a book.

(Notable exceptions to the romance notes above? Garth Nix's recent books (Frogkisser, Terciel and Elanor, Booksellers books) all are a great romance and have a fabulous plot, so the romance in a book like that feels fleshed out and meaningful. But that's another blog post. But, rest assured, you like Regency fantasy? Read Frogkisser. You like to read/like books (or like American Gods, Good Omens, Skulduggery Pleasant)? Read Left Handed Booksellers of London. Butchy FMC and NB love interest in the 80s, come OnNNNnnnNNnNNNnn Garth Nix writing books for healing my inner queer teen. If I read Angel Mage or Booksellers I'd probably be out with they/them pronouns being a blazing queer in all spheres of my irl life, not just the close ones. I cried a bit reading Booksellers when Merlin is just, very genderqueer as a matter of fact because that's a character like me and my favourite childhood author knows people like me exist and lets them be awesome in his books. I tear up thinking about it and I'm nearly 30. Fucking read it even if there's no smut. Angel Mage is on the three musketeers. There's a great female villain. If you're from the US you may not have heard of Nix. You're missing out so fucking bad and I'm sorry.)

I ramble. My vyvanse wore off a couple hours ago so this is my diary now. Never expect short posts.

[biillys]

🔥ask game🔥 for Stranger Things

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

11. number of fandom-related words you've filtered

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

21. part of canon you think is overhyped

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

hello ily thanku 🥺🥺

6. which ship fans are the most annoying?

well every time something's happening it's always the bylers or the steddies making noise. the harringrove gang can def be annoying too but something about the way the others think theyre like. morally correct for their ship etc is just like. give me a fucking break. ur litereally on tumblr dot com. wait actually not a ship technically but the people that are obsessed with the fruity four. literally shut uppppppp

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about?

feel like most of my opinons aren't common enough to weigh in here so idk? billy would never settle for steve fucking harrington? HEATHER would never settle for robin!!!!!! billy and max's relationship is COMPLICATED and the duffers did not get to/try to examine and show that in their limited screentime. so all the idiots that are obsessed with saying max hated billy/was happy he died, read the fucking room!!!!

11. number of fandom related words you have blocked?

lol

usually i don't blacklist things cos usually i'm chill but my dash had so much of them and i found myself like. getting actively annoyed everytime they were on my screen. so i started with blocking steve and was like wow. it's so nice here now that he's gone. lets see if i can make it even better.

unfortunate side effect of this is that i barely see any billy content now cos he's unfortunately linked hand in hand with the others. i miss him so much. it's okay tho cos i can cry into ur inbox about him and send my friend 25 minute audios about him and i made another billy sideblog thats locked that i can post headcanons and fic-ish things on so!!! it's fun still!!!! i may post on this blog like once in a blue moon but he's literally on my mind 24 hours a day. has been for almost five years now.

18. it's absolutely criminal that this fandom has been sleeping on...

six feet under crew. billy, heather, chrissy, and eddie all died. max i'm pretty sure technically died so she's an honourary member. yeah i know others died too but anyway. ANYWAY i think they deserve to have fun and start shit together yknow!!!! i think they'd all fuck each others lives up but also be there to help pick up the pieces!!!! stopping myself here becos otherwise i will not shut up. wait also just max, chrissy, and heather...... el too if we're feeling giving. i just think they'd have fun together!!!!!

WAIT ALSO tommy and carol. BRING 'EM BACK. the trio of billy, eddie, and tommy? but also ALSO the nightmare that would be max, heather, chrissy, and carol.

the idea of billy and max living at the trailer park and neil and susan fucking off? maybe susan stays? idk but just the idea of everyone coming to chill at their trailer or going between theirs and eddies, even though their trailers can absolutely not fit that many people??? friday nights getting fucked up and faded. making terrible life decisions. making permanent life decisions. no i need to shut up now....... fuck.... spending the hours between 11pm and 2am trying to nail down a tattoo design before struggling through work for the weekend, complaining about their bosses, making fucking disasters in the kitchen, carol and tommy surprisingly being the only decent cooks, max having a knack for baking. trying to plan concert trips, talking about how differnt their lives would be if they had went to go to college instead. bingewatching terrrible television. semi decent box-dye jobs. terrible at-home haircut jobs. high school spitting them out and them trying to find their feet in the real world, them all getting full time jobs and trying to like. fucking survive. find a reason to get through the fucking weeks. SHUTTING UP NOW i swear.

19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

idk if i would say i'm ashamed or horrified or anything?? but idk i like dark fic/dead dove fic so like. that one w billy and the demodog? a fav. also i fucking love age gap so i would easily read billy/karen if it was out there. it is not. i've checked. wait forgot max/billy is usually frowned upon. read that easily too.

21. part of canon you think is overhyped?

i dont know a single person hyping up stranger things or it's plot lines/story arc's? fruity four i guess cos after season four that amount of ppl that made that a Thing? crazy.

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing?

'how does billy have fans he literally deserved to die becos [usual list of reasons here]' banging my head against a wall. move on with ur life. everyone else has.

'[insert harringrove hate here]' when ppl post rancid takes on them and then i have to defend it even when i don't care for it like. please. did u not see the shower scene? the basketball scene? the fight scene??? open ur eyes. i may be a hater but i'm not stupid. they fucked for real i'll admit that. the worse the take is the more i'm like damn maybe i do ship them maybe they ARE gay as shit for each other and married right now.

[dis-trict9]

"Only three hours...?"

(This is so rushed, I literally wrote this in Tumblr instead of c+p from Google Docs [I got 4 hours of sleep bc I was playing Subway Surfers until 2am..])

Warnings: Fluff (Here's the video btw: https://youtu.be/d8dW1TZLilQ?si=xsHFfbqIneFh4trM)

Asher opened up his phone to check his screen time Glamour. Everyone else did the same. When Asher had gone to his settings to check the amount of time for his apps, he quickly turned his phone off and put his hand to his mouth, trying to suppress a laugh.

He took his hand away from his mouth when he heard Felix say he'd spent 3 hours on TikTok and, without thinking, he responded: "Only three hours?" It was quiet for a moment. Asher and Felix were severely side-eyeing each other, you would think they hated each other if you were just meeting them for the first time.

"How much time have you spent..." Felix asked, a little hesitant because he knew the younger was practically glued to his phone either, typing some story up, scrolling on TikTok or Instagram, or playing Subway Surfers.

"For which app..?" Asher replied, just as hesitant. The (awkward) silence was broken by Chan's laugh that he failed (horribly) to keep in. After that, everyone else started laughing except for the two maknaes that were still staring (somewhat) into each other's eyes.

Asher pulled up his phone again and showed Felix his times. Felix immediately and audibly gasped when he saw the amount of HOURS spent in only 3-4 apps.

"You've spent FIVE HOURS on SUBWAY SURFERS?" Felix exclaimed, grabbing everyone else's attention. Asher only nodded before they moved onto the next question the Glamour staff (or STAY, idrk) had for them.

A/N: This. Was. So. Rushed. And I'm very tired </3 But!! Happy Memorial Day :3

[morningstarthegood]

fucking hell today was for sure a day

I had an exam in school and then a rock concert I performed at with my choir

just got back and it's fucking 2am, but instead of going to sleep I'm on tumblr

[audiovisualrecall]

I fell asleep at like almost 2am and woke up at 8 and probably should have gone back to sleep for a bit longer bc I really need 7 hrs to be fully rested and I am still sick so sleep/rest is especially important. But instead I went on my phone and now it's 10:40 and I'm still in bed. Because now I'm Stuck. even though I'm starving part of me doesn't want to get up and do anything. I managed to make myself close insta to stop watching videos, but then I scrolled tumblr for a bit and refreshed repeatedly, read a fic, checked my emails and deleted stuff, and then came back on tumblr bc commenting on being Stuck on here usually gets my brain to get Un Stuck. And bc I was going to click on insta again otherwise.

[cookiewrites]

What about having a first sleepover with them? Like begging of relationship, both side still have red cheeks while talking, you know cute moments

omg so cute!!! i struggled with changbin's a little bit but i hope it's okay nonetheless - enjoy!!! 💖💖💖

tumblr sucks and i have almost lost this entire thing three times bc this website has been glitchy af for a month now and it makes it impossible to write and edit imma riot istg

first night at theirs

wc: 1.4k

cw: pet names for reader (jagi/jagiya, baby, babe), mentions of kissing in felix', brief mentions of nervousness/tiny bit of anxiety

the first night staying at chan's was entirely an accident, the two of you had been hanging out working independently in the same room, and when one of you finally checked the time it was far later than it should have been. chan didn't feel comfortable with you walking home late at night so he insisted you stayed; offering you an oversized t-shirt of his to sleep in and keeping his eyes closed as you got changed and into bed. he, of course, makes sure he is not only the big spoon but the best damn big spoon you've ever slept with.

'fuck, since when was it 2am?' you asked, looking up from your laptop to see your boyfriend pulling an earphone out of his ear, double-checking the time on his watch before looking at you; 'there is no way i am letting you walk home at this time.'. 'so what?' 'stay, i'll sleep with one of the gu-' 'absolutely not, if i'm staying i'm staying with you chris'. 'oh. okay.'.

minho will try and act like he doesn't care if you stay or not. the two of you had been hanging out at his apartment and it was pretty late and he would be all 'you can stay, if you want, i don't mind' when inside he's screaming for you to stay. when you decide to because it's raining outside he's very normal about it all, trying not to make a big deal about the fact it's you in his bed, not just one of his cats. he actually locks the three cats out of his bedroom for the night just so you can get a good night's sleep.

'oh god it's raining, are you sure it's okay if i stay?' you ask, turning around to your boyfriend. 'up to you jagi' he says, as if he isn't internally begging you to stay; dreaming about getting to wake up next to you, getting to make breakfast with you half-asleep giving him a back hug, feeding the cats together - fuck even the way you'll look in the morning sun. 'huh?' he says, coming back to reality, realising you'd been speaking. 'i said i'll stay if it really is okay.' 'fine with me jagiya.'.

changbin invites you over just to sleep, knowing how late his schedule and then workout runs, he tells you to come over at bedtime just to get straight into bed. he'll take any time with you, even unconscious - sometimes if you're lucky there will be time to eat dinner before curling up. he gives you keys to his place immediately just in case you have to lock up as he has to leave you in bed in the morning, always preferring you get some rest instead of waking up to go to the gym with him at five in the morning.

almost immediately upon letting yourself into the dorm, changbin is dragging you into bed, giving you mere moments to get changed into a t-shirt of his before he's pulling the duvet up over your shoulders and turning the lights off. he tells you about your day, voice low and softly vibrating through his chest, as you drift off - hoping he'll be there in the morning, or at least kiss you goodbye.

hyunjin makes you staying at his a big deal. he plans the whole night, out, even begs felix to help him prepare dinner, has candles and fresh bedding and flowers in his room - the whole nine yards. he lets you choose your side of the bed and from that day on always makes sure that bedside table is clear, and the drawer has things you might need when you were over. he wants everything to be perfect, and he'll get so caught up in that he'll forget to actually get into bed with you, just admiring the view of you curling into your side of his bed.

'are you actually coming to bed pretty boy?' you tease, tucked comfortably into the left side of the bed, as your boyfriend stands at the end of the bed staring at you. 'oh, yeah' he laughs, moving to get into the other side, trying his hardest to not disturb the way you'd laid the duvet on top of you. 'this is perfect baby' you comment before curling into him. 'yeah, it is' he whispers back, as the two of you drift off.

jisung wouldn't be able to stop worrying about you being uncomfortable, constantly getting back out of bed to adjust the aircon because he thought he saw you shiver and grabbing you another glass of water because maybe the others got warm, and he should get another blanket. and eventually, you get fed up of him being up and down worrying things weren't perfect and you beg him to get into bed with you, where you hold him close so he can't get out again.

'han jisung please get into bed! i want to cuddle you!' you beg, laughing as jisung moves erratically around the room. jisung froze by the bedroom door again, getting up to go and get you a snack in case you woke up hungry. he turned around and smiled at you. 'please, sungie, all i need is you.'. he sighed, before moving to get into bed with you.

staying at felix' was one of those things that started as soon as the relationship started, it just felt normal. you'd go over when his day ended, make and eat dinner together, and then end up falling asleep to something on the tv. eventually one or the other of you would drag you both actually into bed, curling up facing each other because felix insists on kissing you until he is literally too sleepy to be able to anymore.

'babe' you say, gently trying to awake the australian sleeping on you, a small 'mm' is given in reply. 'let's go to bed, the sofa is not gonna be helping your back'. 'mmm'. 'oh, i guess no bedtime kisses for you then' you say as you start to move towards his bedroom, only to hear his feet padding towards you moments later. 'kisses please' he says when he catches up, which you are more than happy to give him.

your first night with seungmin doesn't involve a lot of sleeping, the two of you playing games all night, and just hanging out; until you fall asleep on his shoulder somewhere near 5am. you had planned to stay, and had got into your pyjamas earlier on in the night but the prospect of actually sleeping next to seungmin was making you nervous so you'd stayed up until you couldn't anymore. seungmin would try and carry you to bed, but you'd wake up in the process, and you'd go to bed together.

'you didn't have to carry me minnie' you laugh, as he pulls you into bed. 'i wanted to, i didn't want to wake you up, it's so late' he explains as you instinctually move close to him, head resting on his chest. the warmth and steady rise and fall of it lulling you back into exhaustion. 'can we sleep in?' you whisper half asleep. 'we don't have to get back out of this bed ever again if you don't want to angel.'.

jeongin is surprisingly calm about you staying, he would tell himself over and over as he fails to sleep holding you. the two of you had napped next to each other before and this is no different as he watches the clock tick over another hour. he would just be too scared to sleep and maybe roll over and wake you up, and he wanted to be there if you had a nightmare, and he didn't want to say anything weird in his sleep, and he honestly wouldn't actually get any rest until you wake up and force him to be the little spoon - holding him until his heart rate slows down.

'innie' you murmur half asleep. 'yeah, babe?' he responds, sounding far too awake for what you guess is 3am. realising that the man curled up behind you wasn't getting any rest you roll over, pushing him to do the same until he settled in your arms. 'sleep innie' you instruct, before kissing the back of his neck, holding him tight and drifting off again; jeongin doing the same a little while later, feeling safe in your arms.

[takaraphoenix]

It's currently 2am, I see a charmed post, and my brain immediately starts doing the thing it shouldn't be doing right now. It's thinking instead of letting me sleep. So, since it refuses to let me sleep, I've decided to make it your problem because you shared the post. Keeping with that, I'll share what my brain is questioning.

What do you think it would be like if Prue lived and met Paige? Do you think they'd get along? Do you think they'd be close? How do you think Paige's relationship with Piper and Phoebe would change with Prue still being around? Would anything actually change there? And how do you think things would have changed (in regards to future events and even naming future children) with Prue still being alive? Would things stay the same? Would things change? Would Wyatt and Chris still exist? Would they not? Basically, what are your thoughts on an AU where Prue never died and how do you think things would change because of that?

Pro tip on the matter of making your brain stop think instead of sleep: try putting THE PHONE DOWN and stop BEING ON TUMBLR xDDD

Oh hell no. I'm thinkin s1 Prue-Phoebe times ten to be honest. Paige was such a BRAT in her first season and Prue never had time for brats, she would be So Done with Paige.

I did always like how Paige shifted the dynamics, giving Phoebe more responsibilities and making Piper step up as the oldest sister. But these were all new dynamics for them.

If Prue was alive, she would just continue being the responsible older sister, probably kind of mothering Paige. Maybe that'd have helped make Paige act more responsible sooner?

I also think it would have shifted Paige's attitude a little, because Paige did feel like a replacement when she first came into the family - Prue left big shoes to fill and Paige was there to see the grief and see how high Piper and Phoebe held Prue. If Prue was alive, if Paige just slotted into the family with all of them alive, without the expectations to live up to Prue's legacy and with the freedom to fully carve out her own spot, things would have been different.

Maybe her and Phoebe would have had a closer relationship from the get go, as the two youngest. Phoebe knowing what Prue's expectations can feel like on someone, while getting to be excited about no longer being the youngest, without the grief and responsibility she felt in canon, they could have had an easier and perhaps... lighter? Dynamic. Phoebe was at her strictest when she was with Paige and you could always feel that she was channeling her inner Prue, but with a living Prue, she wouldn't have to and she'd have been allowed to relish in the joy of becoming an older sister more.

Concerning future children; while I do keep the the canon kids, I also change some named. I just absolutely hate the name of Phoebe's firstborn and I don't like that she got named after Prue instead of Piper's daughter. And even with alive Prue, I'd like to think of Piper's daughter as Melinda Prudence Halliwell. There's shenannigans to be had to justify a naming after even without honoring the dead sister; perhaps Prue was playing a big role in the birth of the kid, saving the baby's life or something.

I also change the name of another Phoebe daughter, because I like to think that Cole/Phoebe's son, had he lived, would be named Parker then; Parker Benjamin. So her daughters would be Phenia, Palmer and Peyton.

While I accept basically all of the canon kids (aside from making Phoebe's kids Cole's kids), Phenia is my one non-negotiable OC off-spring. She takes over the role of the oldest daughter, since the set of cousins born in 2007 seems significant and meaningful. But, uh, that's that on my next gen lineup, otherwise this derails too much. xD"

I do think that Wyatt and Chris would still exist as is. They may just no longer be the oldest kids around, because Prue was the oldest and had Andy and if both of them lived, I'd like to think they would have gotten married and had kids themselves.

[katsukikitten]

Back at it again since tumblr didnt want me in the tags the first time

Bakugou was irritable today. Not that his irritability was anything new but every little thing set his skill crawling. His forearms littered with threatening pops as he bared his teeth to anyone brave enough to look his way. 

He figured the only way to get his agitation out was to hit something, anything.

 So he headed to one of the two closest gyms from his small apartment to blow off some much needed steam. The local 24 hour gym that was open to the public was a no go, not just because it was always over crowded but also because he got banned after cussing out some damn extras who were snapping pictures of him instead of working out like one should. Leaving his only other option to be the agency's "gym". 

When he first set foot into the sorry excuse of a gym he demanded a better upgrade for it, if they expected to keep him and Kirishima in top shape. Otherwise he would begin to look elsewhere considering other agencies were dying to have the newest upcoming pro hero in their rankings. The agency obliged, delivering his expectations and more in less than a week. Guess being in the top five really did have its perks. 

The ash blonde pulls his shiny new coupe into the parking garage and finds a spot closest to the entrance. He grabs for his water bottle from the passenger seat before exiting the car, locking his black beauty as he made his way inside.  He swipes his fob over the keypad before it beeps while flashing green, allowing him entrance to the back door of the basement. Walking past the long corridor of support labs that had long since closed to get to the gym. The rooms illuminated by the low light of locked computers, secrets and redesigns stowed away behind bullet proof glass. 

Nearing the end of the dimly lit hall he spies harsh light flooding onto the linoleum floor, indicating that someone seemed to be collecting some major overtime. From his experiences at UA he figured each room would be filled to the brim with over eager support, eccentrically yelling at one another over specs and improvements, sharing their love of science at a volume much too high for Bakugou's taste. Shortly after his hero debut he discovered just how wrong he was about the support labs. He had needed a 2am, mid shift, costume adjustment so he came here, expecting the place to be brimming with brilliant minds only to find one person still working. 

So it should be no surprise that at 10:30 at night there was one room that was clearly occupied. Still a rare curiosity takes over the hot head as he peeks into the room while passing, wondering if he will catch a glimpse of you again. 

He found you odd, as you seemed to be nocturnal or better yet maybe you didn't sleep at all. No need for it as your hunger for knowledge seemed to outweigh any basic human need.

Bakugou had only seen you a handful of times, here and there in passing towards the gym at all hours of the day and night. Maybe it was just coincidence that he would find you hunched over something with this gleam in your eye as you destroyed and rebuilt the item over and over again.  

He shakes his head, he doesn't get it. Doesn't get why you dedicate so much time when no one else in your department seemed to give as much of a damn as you did. Or maybe he did get it, maybe it was similar to how he pushes himself so he can be number one, except yours was just for intellectual stimulation. 

After an hour and a half of throwing weights and punches around and becoming heavily drenched in sweat, Bakugou finally calls it a night. Gulping water from his water bottle before wiping at the sheen that collected on his forehead. He sighs out, before catching himself in the mirror. Smirking as he flexes, letting go a few pops. Admiring not only his improved physique but also his new hair style. Sides faded but top long, ash strands looking borderline messy, as if someone had just caught him and a lover kissing heavily in a dark hall during a house party, their fingers desperately pulling at his hair. 

He reaches for the ceiling in a grunting stretch as a yawn forces its way out. He leaves the gym, switching off the lights before making his way back to the parking garage. A furrow of his brow as he notices the light to your lab is still on, maybe you had forgotten to kill the light when you left or maybe you were still tinkering away.  Crimson eyes peer into the room, spying you as you begin to stretch. Your eyes latch onto his as he watches your expression go from concentrated to elated. You jump from your seat, causing Bakugou's brow to furrow more before you're flinging open the door and yanking at his wrist.

"Wow what are the odds?! Well I guess they would be around 4.64% considering you don't normally frequent this gym but I should also factor in your recent ban raising it up to.." 

"Oi, shitty woman, quit the nerd talk!" He yanks his wrist from your small, delicate hands. Totally unsure of what your name is and even if he did know it, he would sooner address you with an insult than your family name. 

"Ah I forget, not everyone loves numbers. But still I am quite lucky tonight." You beam up at him, hair threatening to fall loose from its haphazardly shaped bun, "You're just the man I needed to see, Bakugou." 

He isn't sure why but a faint blush creeps to his cheeks, was it your bright smile that threw him so off guard or was it the way your lips formed around his name?

He sucks his teeth, looking away from you with crossed arms. 

"Well I'm sweaty as fuck, so you really don't need me." He huffs but before he can turn on his heel you're clamping cool black metal to his forearms. You guide him to the door to the testing area of your lab, turning his arms this way and that to make sure your measurements are perfect as you ramble on. 

"No! No! That is the perfect condition for this experiment. I've been working on your winter costume since there are deficiencies with your current one. Since you, and I'm sure you already know, sweat less in the winter there needs to be some sort of counter balance to offset the possibility of little to no stored sweat. Preventive measures could be made sure and you collect sweat from previous activities but 'stale' sweat does not ignite as quickly or as violently as fresh sweat. One could argue that using heavier and denser materials could help aid in more sweat production but this risks overheating should a mission need you inside or a rapid change in environment all together outweight any benefit. So not only are these bracers less obnoxious than your gauntlets, no offense, but they collect 56 to even 62% more of expandable sweat compared to the normal 54% all while reducing the amount needed for ignition. Sure my colleagues could say that's a marginal improvement at best but…" Heat radiates off of him in waves, pulling your eye upwards. You're met with a red hot gaze that seems to rake over your skin. An odd chill runs down your spine as you realize your mistake. 

Nerd talk.  And rambling nerd talk at that. 

All the while Bakugou wonders why your hands are so damn cold and yet they feel good, soothing to his warmed skin. Refreshing even as it reminds him of a passing breeze in the summer or hiding in the shade from the sun.

A bit of heat rushes into your cheeks as you suddenly realize how close you are to THE Ground Zero. Someone who you knew so intimately through paper and yet knew nothing about all at the same time. You knew his measurements, the circumference of his head, his biceps, the number of inches around his thighs. Hell, you had them memorized since the big boss upstairs assigned you his costume and accessories well over a year ago. And yet you couldn't even fathom to name his favorite color or favorite food for that matter.

You swallow thickly, clearing your throat as you move on, dropping his deadly hands as you do.

"Ah, anyway, these bracers are designed to help with not only better sweat collection in both summer and winter but to aid in some stealth missions as they make no sound compared to your heavy gauntlets." You smile at him once more causing his stomach to flip before those small icy hands press harshly into his toned hot back, pushing him into the testing chamber behind diamond glass. 

"I just need you to test them. I need to make sure they can withstand your heat and power." With that you shut him away, quickly trotting to the mic on the other side. Pressing the button to speak as he turns his arms over looking at the smooth black material 

"Now, remember, it takes less sweat. So don't go all out!" At first you worry it falls on deaf ears before he gives a nod your way. Suddenly you are in awe of the power house that stands before you as his expression changes from utter agitation to complete determined focus, all with something as simple as a deep breath out. He focuses on producing enough sweat to ignite, calling on his quirk as if it were an extension of himself. Pooling it onto his skin, permeating the air with the slight smell of burnt sugar before he let's go a small pop. 

But the medium sized explosion he had expected was anything but what was produced.  Suddenly the brace on his arm explodes from the pressure as does the diamond glass in the room. Fear grips Bakugou as shards of glass go flying towards you before you flick your wrist harshly.  

The deadly shards bypass you, glistening shrapnel sinks deeply into the tile floor around you like a piece of jagged art.

And yet you seem unphased, delighted even as a manic smile paints your lips before it sours. Eyes noticing that the bracer barely stood up to the challenge. 

"Fuck…the density still cannot withstand the joules output or force that Bakugou is capable of…" A string of murmurs that remind him all too much of Deku as your fingers curl in the air, calling forth the failed experiment with unseen forces. The blonde long forgotten as you hunch over the workbench, going back to square one. 

Crimson eyes dissect your form and actions as you pull various books and tools towards you with the influence of your quirk, hovering around the work space. 

Suddenly you feel heat radiating behind you when normally you're enveloped in the cool air of the air conditioning, kept extra low in the labs to prevent overheating of parts. You look over your shoulder, suddenly remembering the Pro hero who's beginning to wonder why you're in support with a quirk like that. 

"I know, I know. The last bus and train left hours ago. I'll catch them in the morning." You guess at why he's lingering as you wave him off with your hand. He's caught off guard by your statement before he notices the clock, going to open his mouth to scold before snapping it shut. 

Why should he care if you work through the night? What was he gonna do? Offer you a ride when he didn't even know your name? 

He sucks his teeth biting out as he leaves. 

"Just call me when you're ready to test these again." 

Weeks pass and it's as you never left the lab. Glued to the same spot as he tests the product every other week only for you to grow more and more frustrated with each failure punctuated by shattered bracers. 

And every time he enters the lab room he learns something new about you. He can tell when or if you've left the lab for longer than a few minutes by how tidy the space is or lack thereof. A chaotic circle encompasses you filled with random items that you hope will ignite a spark of inspiration. Anything from books to thin sheets of metal and even to soft fabrics that haphazardly lay atop metal tools. Anything one could possibly imagine was probably there, sitting along-side several empty cups that once held iced coffee. He notices the bags beneath your eyes as they darken with each passing week and he's beginning to wonder if you've ever left as he leaves anywhere between 12 to 3am most nights. 

Tonight is no different as he makes his way to the gym at midnight while you're hunched over his bracers. A part of him wants to tell you to stop being an idiot, to rip you from your little stool and drag you to your bed or wherever the fuck you'll sleep as the other part points out 'why do you fucking care?' So he watches silently, eyes fixated on you until he runs out of glass to look through before he locks himself away in the gym. 

Bakugou puts in his black wireless earbuds before cranking his music up, tossing his phone onto a nearby workbench. He stretches this way and that, reaching for the sky as he looks at his form in the mirror, his hard earned V and bottom two abs wink at his reflection beneath his signature black tank top and his black hoodie. 

His fist connects easily with the heavy black bag suspended by a large chain. The sandbag swings back and forth with a creak with each heavy handed blow. Bakugou loses time with each kick and hit thrown at the bag, each passing song fueling his desire to melt his frustration until his hair is plastered to his forehead. He lets out a steadying breath as his heart roars in his chest,he rears his fist back for a final blow backed by a bit of his quirk. It connects with the well worn leather with such force a weak link in the chain snaps as the fabric obliterates, the 200lb bag flies into the mirror behind it. Shards of reflective glass glitter as they rain onto the matted floor. 

"Fuck." He huffs, stretching and turning to the opposite mirror. Sending a quick snap of his tongue out with the caption "Oops" as the background showcases the decimated gym to Kirishima. He picks up his bag, removing his ear buds to be met with the cool air of the hallway. 

Your light is still on causing him to grind his teeth as his phone reads 2:45am. He's angry enough he chooses to avoid looking into your enclosure as he walks past, fearful his sharp tongue will give him away. He misses you perk up, frantically waving for him to come in before you're at the door, flinging it open to yell out much too loudly in the empty halls. 

"Bakugou!" Your voice is hoarse and cracks from disuse before you clear your throat, lightly jogging to catch up to his large stride, "I've done it!" 

He ignores you, lips pursed in a tight line before your cold hand wraps tightly around his wrist. Pulling him back to the lab with eager steps. He rips away his wrist with a growl and follows you reluctantly, you seem unphased by his harsh actions. 

"I've finally perfected it. I'm sure this time. I was looking at it all wrong. Larger surface area does not always equate to better absorption. Not to mention the pressure for the explosions beneath the bracer is what was causing the failure in the first place. A marginal error that I should have caught earlier. This new design covers less than 15% of your skin but increases��." You ramble but it all falls on deaf ears. 

Bakugou sees that your hair is so loose in its ponytail it might as well be down. The bags beneath your eyes weigh heavy on your pretty features, your skin showing signs of dehydration as it seems to have lost some of its elasticity. Your lab coat is wrinkled and your nametag, that you're wearing for once, is pinned on upside down. He commits your name to memory although he finds it odd that it must be your first name instead of your family name, then again you do hail from overseas. As the two of you walk into your lab he realizes instantly that it has become your main living space. Shards of diamond glass still litter your floor, there is no rhyme or reason to the placement of objects.  Tools, and trash commingle in dangerous piles and stacks around the room. Something knits itself as it floats in the air, wavering a bit when you pause your rambling to yawn.

"Oi nerd!" Bakugou's voice is sharp, authoritative as he grips onto your wrist. Eyes still washing over the room before they land on you. Somehow you're too daft or too tired to pick up on his concern. 

"Yea yea nerd talk. I fucking get it." A half snap from your exhaustion, "Just…" 

You lose his grip before grabbing onto his arm, finding a mesh woven bracer somehow on that disastrous desk. It seems to be made of a soft, elastic fabric as you slip it over his thick forearm after shoving away his sweatshirt sleeve.

"Perfect, your sweat output was pretty close to max earlier. I could smell caramel from the gym. This is going to be so fucking great!" You giggle in delight as the other mesh bracer finishes itself, dropping before you frantically reach for it. He notices your faulty step, your under the breath curse and the long moment your eyes flutter. He almost bites his tongue clean off. 

Again your cool hands find his burning skin as you try to keep your tired brain focused on the task at hand and not how his forearms have grown nearly a half inch since your first encounter. It's difficult not to fall victim to his intoxicating smell as you force yourself to not sway on your feet and collapse into a lovely muscular man. His heat seems to have some sort of affect on you, causing an odd affinity between you both.

"Okay all done! Please give a medium sized blast!" You encourage, shoving him into the testing chamber as he glares down at you. He isn't sure why your chaotic state is bothering him but it does. He rolls his eyes as you slam the door shut. He brings clarity to his mind, focusing on his quirk and how the sweat feels against his skin. How it yearns to be something more, to explode into a whispering flame that may catch something ablaze. 

He gives in, just a little, giving it what it wants, igniting it with a simple thought. An explosion he would have considered large if he were still at UA but since all he's done is grow these past five years, earning him the number 3 rank, it comes to no surprise when the glass shatters yet again. 

Except this time you're too entranced with the smoke clearing, of seeing if your baby you've slaved over has made it through to comprehend the sharp threat. You notice the flying glass a moment too late, flicking your wrist to change the trajectory from what was supposed to be your entire body but your arms are grazed by the razor sharp shards. You grit your teeth, cursing to yourself calling forth a first aid kit. 

But nothing shows up in your peripheral except for a looming presence. One you give your back to in order to find the first aid kit with your gaze, when was the last time you ever had to look at something to summon it? 

Damn it, how could you be experiencing quirk failure from exhaustion right now? Sure it took a lot of brain power for your quirk but it takes weeks of no sleep for a failure plus you had been eating...your eyes glance around the room. You hadn't been eating, or so it says from the lack of any sort of plate or take out aside from your iced coffees with the added protein and carbohydrate shots your body needed to process your quirk with ease. 

Fuck, guess it really was quirk failure. You bite your lip, unable to find that damned kit hoping the hot head wouldn't catch on to your short coming. 

Vermillion eyes watch crimson spots bloom across the white fabric of your coat. He grinds his teeth, searching for the first aid kit only to find it knocked beneath a shelf. He rights himself, stalking your way with a grimace just to stop in his tracks. He watches you slip your oversize jacket off of strong shoulders, toned arms adorned with several thin slices that weep red, but what has really caught his attention was that body con dress. 

Sticking to you like a second skin, but looking somehow comfortable at the same time, he wonders for a moment if you've made it yourself. It's similar to the fabric used to make his shirts, breathable, soft, always smelling a bit sweet like you when they are fresh from the lab. His hand twitches as he can imagine how supple your curves would feel in the delicate yet sturdy material, palm already too familiar with the soft sensation. Red catches his eye once again pulling him from the trance that is your body. He sneers at the cuts as he grabs onto your cold shoulder, shoving you into your chair so he can work on you. You look up a bit shocked with a pinch of anger mixed in and a dash of hurt pride. He takes no notice as he wraps bandages tight around your arms, your eyes locked onto the bracers. The smile on your face cannot be helped as you stare proudly at your work, it was able to withstand so much power and remain not only in tact but unsinged. You grab onto his wrist turning it this way and that, a pen and pad float near by as you take notes. Bakugou cannot hide his astonishment as he watches the invisible hand borrow your neat yet rushed script as it is unable to keep up with your thoughts. You pull the bracers from his arms, fabric begins to tear itself thread by thread before spooling itself, wrapping around wood as if it were a snake. He pulls away, eyes hard as he talks himself out of whatever the stupid "heroic" side of him is saying. He takes a step back and with it taking his warmth. You shiver but you are too busy to notice, teeth chattering ever so slightly but you're too busy studying. He growls to himself. 

Suddenly you're enveloped in a dizzying sweet smell and warmth, it is then you realize that Bakugou had shoved his hoodie over your head. Slinking your arms into the holes to move the hood of the sweatshirt back, quickly realizing the material is not damp as you had once thought. It's warm from his quirks use, material dry as a bone, reminding you of pulling your favorite blanket fresh from the dryer just to wrap yourself in it as rain taps on the window of your apartment. 

Subconsciously you snuggle into it, opening your mouth to state how much work you have to do but instead you have to stifle a yawn. 

Had the cold of the lab always kept you awake, were you starting to actually feel the weight of your work only because you were warm? 

"I think it's time for bed, nerd." 

He places his hot palm on the back of your neck in a power move as he speaks. He enrages you and entices you all at once as your face snaps up to meet his gaze, your own eyes burning holes into him. He smirks down at you, deciding in this moment that he really likes you.  

"I'm taking you home. Get your shit." He squeezes your nape as a warning. He isn't taking no for an answer.

"I'll take the bus and train in the morning, three hours is child's play." Hitting his hand away, trying to return to your work. He scoffs in response. 

"You sure are oblivious for someone so smart. Tomorrow is Saturday." He crosses his exposed arms, unable to hide his smug smirk as realization washes over your stunning features, "That means the bus won't be in the business district til 10am." 

"I think I'll be okay." You say after a moment of silence, "I've waited longer. Or I could walk..." 

"Will you?" He retorts, "Your office says otherwise." 

You follow his gaze, your entire office in disarray, as if a bomb went off. 

You guess in a sense one had gone off. Biting your lip as you mull it over, eyes finding Bakugou's file shuffled across your desk, spying your own hand written cliff notes. 

Stubborn your script reads, you sigh admitting defeat as you wave your hand over the file. It tidies itself, papers folding neatly back into the Manila folder before you snap your fingers. 

Bakugou watches items soar around the room, books fighting and bickering over their order, pens and pencils long forgotten in corners of the room race back to their place on your desk. Papers flutter and fall into the trash or shredder in defeat as plastic cups sink into the plastic bin in the corner. The diamond glass follows suit as your own hands grab onto the bracers, giving them a gentle squeeze before you access an invisible drawer on your desk, hiding away your project before pushing it back. Wood flush against wood as if there were no drawer at all. 

A question burns on the tip of Bakugou's tongue, it dies in his throat for now as a new one is born. 

"That Kirishima's faceplate?" The question comes out in the form of a bite, for some reason the thought of his more likeable friend coming in here as often as Bakugou has set his blood boiling. 

"Ah yes, I just got this assignment from the big boss. Kirishima's new unbreakable breaks his faceplate everytime. Otto had it before me, which was odd. He is more of a reverse engineer. Taking an unknown material and figuring out how it works." Your eyes linger over the empty office across the way, "But he's been out and Kirishima can apparently no longer be on the back burner. Especially now that I've finished with the company's top hero." 

His heart melts just a bit as he watches a smidge of pride form in your dazzling eyes. He scoffs to change the topic.

"Come on, shitty woman." He guides you to the parking garage. 

Once there he acts out of character. At least what you would believe to be out of character as he holds open the door to his car for you, waiting for you to step in. 

"What?! I ain't fucking kidnapping you but I ain't letting you weasel out of this shit either." He growls, waiting impatiently by the door. You step in as he gently shuts the door behind you. He steps in himself, the engine purrs to life as you give him your address. 

"That far out? And you were gonna fucking walk?" He laughs, "Hell no, never again. You'll call me before you do that next time." 

"I don't have your number asshole." You grumble to yourself but he grabs your unlocked phone from your hands, plugging in his number and calling it. 

"There now you do." He locks it and puts it in his cup holder, demanding your attention. No longer can he keep that burning question to himself, "Why are you on support?" 

It puzzles you for a second before you realize he means it as a compliment to your quirk and not an insult to your intellect. 

"Oh that's easy. Being a hero wouldn't benefit me, it's too restrictive. I'm more of a…." You ponder on your words, vigilante was wrong, you wouldn't take justice into your own hands for the sake of others and villain was too strong, "Chaotic neutral. My moral compass is pretty grey and being in this lab benefits my need for knowledge." 

Bakugou glances your way, respectful of your honesty while your eyes become heavy watching the street lights blur, the hum of the engine pulling you deeper into relaxation.  There was something about a car ride that took you back to your childhood days in America.  The outskirts of the city would quickly wind into back roads lined with corn stalks that scrapped the sky. 

The street lights slowly became fewer and farther in between as the black coupe took you further from the heart of the city, soon more stars began to dot the sky.  You see just the tip of his zodiac constellation, it stirs a question within you. 

"So why do you want to be a hero?" You keep your eyes focused on the backdrop that lies beyond the tinted glass, missing Bakugou's knuckles turn stark white. 

He doesn't speak and that's answer enough for you.  

It took him an hour to get to your side of town, an hour. One you had said you would walk, one you mentioned you had walked before. He pulls up the sidewalk by your building, turning to you. 

"We're here…" His announcement turns into a sigh as he sees your slumped form. Head limp but thankfully not leaning on the glass as you're snuggled into his hoodie. You're murmuring how you need to update your measurements in your sleep causing Bakugou to roll his eyes. He pulls away to parallel park. He debates, should he wake you? 

No, who's to say you wouldn't attempt tor eturn to your work? He sighs, pocketing your phone and pulling the lanyard out of your purse that has, what he assumes,your house key on it. 

Katsuki's blood runs ice cold in his veins as realization sucker punches him square in the chest. He had NO fucking idea which apartment was yours. He turns your key over and over but why would that have the number on it? 

"Fuck." He would have to pray your mailbox was both clearly labeled and inside. He shoulders your purse before scooping you into his arms, sure to cradle you like the princess you are. 

He steps through the automatic doors, relief washes over him as a wall of mail boxes greet him. Better yet, they were neatly labeled with names AND apartment numbers.

But it is not long lived as his red eyes rake over the names, the family names, last names. He only knew your first and of course, of fucking course the Gods would laugh at him as panic rises in his throat. You had to have the most common first initial didn't you?  He had spotted it six times already but none of the last names seemed out of the ordinary, if anything they were all ordinary, run of the mill Japanese last names. Nothing foreign about them. 

"Fuck." He murmurs, plan B wouldn't work either, he can't just try out every fucking apartment with your first initial, how weird would that be, some guy shoving keys in random doors with a passed out woman in his arms. 

"Fuck." He cusses again. Was he going to have to take you to his apartment? Fuck, fuck fuck! He couldn't do that, the press slunk around his apartment like vultures, even at this hour.

"Oh you must be the guy that's been keeping her up so late at night." A voice sounds behind him, he turns towards the sound. A smaller young man smiles at him as if he and Bakugou share an inside joke. 

"Quite nice of you to bring her home, and get her mail." He laughs softly reaching for something in the desk, he approaches slowly, "But she must have forgotten to tell you she lost her key a couple of weeks ago. She always asks me to get the mail instead of paying the lost key fee. Don't blame her though." 

The desk clerk, Wantanabe, rambles on as Bakugou's sharp eyes watch closely. Silently thanking the Gods' for their blessing as he watches Watanabe slide the spare key into your mail slot. He commits your last name to memory, but more importantly 5C burns into his retinas. 

"...she hasn't been home in four weeks,  so she has a lot of mail." That snaps Bakugou back to the present, a small stack of mail is presented to him. He stares down at your form unable to keep the scowl off of his face. The dark circles beneath your eyes seem to become darker by the second. 

"Thanks." He growls through gritted teeth, snatching the mail as best he can without disturbing you. He looks for an elevator and when he sees he will have to climb five flights of stairs he wonders if this is the reason you don't come home often. 

Soon enough 5C is staring Bakugou in the face. He is hesitant, even if he does bring you home safely he wonders if you would misread his actions. As the saying goes, no good deed goes unpunished. Still his hands move quickly, sliding the key into the door and unlocking your mysteries. The apartment is sizable for the area, clean at least what he can see from the light of the hall flooding in. He flips on a switch with his elbow, he expected harsh light but instead ambient string lights that line the ceiling illuminate the space in a warm light. A three chair island with a marble water fall looks out into the living room, a large sectional couch swallows the space, a TV atop a nice entertainment table while books litter the coffee table and one part of the couch. The apartment feels as if it had been warmed by the sun through the drawn curtains but not overly hot, it feels cozy really.  As if Bakugou could imagine himself spread out on the grey sofa while you're curled against him, half dozing half reading your book. 

The thought jarrs him, he feels too close to you now, feverish almost as he rips your key from the door, shutting it softly before placing the lanyard onto the kitchen island. He spies a hall and passes a full bath, then a freshly vacant guest room to see a final door closed that he assumes is the master. He flips the switch and again light snakes around the ceiling washing the room in this comfort. He can understand the soft yellow lights considering you spend forty plus hours beneath harsh, bleaching white lights. He pulls back the comforter as best he can and lies you down gently. He removes your red bottom heels and praises the Kamisama when he sees you do not have on tights not that he would remove them anyway. You snuggle deeper into his hoodie, smiling as you do, dreaming of whatever little scientist's dream about. Katsuki imagines it's all math, measurements, molecular structures, nerd shit. You begin to murmur in your sleep.

"...gotta update his chart…" 

"Fucking nerd." Bakugou smiles to himself, you look peaceful even as your mind races with reminders. Another snuggle deeper into his hoodie, he goes to reach out to push hair from your face and stops himself. 

"What the fuck am I doing?" He growls aloud, he doesn't know you. Barely figured out your last name and that was by both chance and stupidity on the desk clerk's. He heads for your bedroom door, stopping with his hand gripping the handle. He peers over his shoulder before killing the switch, flooding your room with darkness. 

He shuts the door and with it the odd ache that's growing in his chest.