#it’s a joke I’m not really killing people

[ghouljams]

how does one become free of insecurity? i’m already doing therapy but i feel i’ve only moved away from hating myself so much i want to d*e into just thinking everyone’s better than me

It's a long journey, but well worth it.

I don't think anyone is ever truly free of insecurity, but I think there's also a lot that is unpacked simply through the language we use to describe ourselves and the jokes we allow other people to make at our expense.

Therapy is great at helping you deal with the big feelings, but sometimes little things get caught in your head and it's hard to shake them. Here are some things that I do to keep myself feeling good, and also some things that I'm working on:

No suicide jokes. I make it a point never to joke about "oh I'll just kill myself" or anything like that because ultimately it just makes me feel worse and nobody finds it funny. It's also a good way to change your thinking and direct your solution brain away from "I'll just end things when shit gets hard." This one is a constant battle.

I compliment myself whenever I have the chance. I take every compliment someone gives me. I pretend to be vapid and self-absorbed. I make kissy faces at myself in the mirror. I tell other people how pretty I am, and I don't fucking care if they think I'm a stupid bimbo because I'm trying to love myself and that's more important.

Being kinder to my younger self. This one feels weird but I found myself being mean to little Ghoul when I was really sad. It feels easy to take out your anger on a kid that didn't know any better, and it doesn't guilt you because that's you that you're hating. But look. You were just a kid. You weren't stupid or ugly or unlovable or evil, you were a kid. I just caught myself calling my teenage self ugly the other day on my way to visit my mom and I had to stop and go "why am I saying this? I was just a kid." And it made me cry a li'l bit ngl, but if felt... idk it felt good in a way.

Don't let fucking anyone tell you, you're not worth it. Does your friend make jokes about how dumb you are? Or how you're so cringey? Or so embarrassing or bad at something or forgetful or WHATEVER? Yeah, fuck that noise. Tell them to stop doing that. Tell them it hurts your feelings and if they still don't stop they aren't your friend, they're your bully. I fucking hate bullies. Don't let anyone talk down to you, I don't care if it was a joke at first, it's not funny anymore. Fuck them.

This is something I'm working on, but when you start fixing one insecurity another will probably pop up. I've been working for a long time on liking how I look, and it's gone really well. But now I'm insecure about my intelligence. So I have to stop myself from calling myself stupid or not answering questions. I just fucking rocked my work trivia party, and Mr. Ghoul thinks I'm smart, so I just gotta keep track of my wins. Sometimes you realize that making yourself secure in one thing makes you insecure about another, but that's ok! There's a learning curve to all of this.

Everyone thinks everyone else is better than them. You don't have to be the best at everything, you don't even have to be the best at one thing! What's important is that you're doing your best. People notice when you're working hard, even if you're not churning out the best product because it means you care about it. Which brings me to

Done is better than perfect. Sure it would be great if you were God's most specialist soldier, but think about how much work that would be! Ok so you're not the world's best knitter, but the scarf you made your friend is their favorite scarf anyway because you made it. So you're not a world class writer, but you had a story in your head and you wrote it down. That's better than it never being written at all. Also just because you think it's bad doesn't mean other people won't think it's a masterpiece. Hell, half of the fics I wrote when I first started this blog I could write better now but that doesn't make them bad, it just means I've gotten better.

We as humans are constantly improving and evolving. Don't let who you are no stop you from striving towards who you'll be in the future. Taking one step down the path towards loving yourself is better than giving up and hating yourself forever. It's slow going, but man I've been doing this shit for a decade and I'm so much happier than I was at 18.

You might think that the more you improve the harder and faller you'll fall back to the bottom, but the lows don't get that low again. You're doing great. I'm proud of you.

[aufberontrove]

Jayvik, Christian Linke, and the Discourse

Hey y’all, I’m breaking a bit from my usual type of post, but we’re still talking about Arcane, so it’s not too off-topic. I encourage anyone reading this to share their thoughts on anything I’m bringing up—or even to bring new ideas into the conversation. Just please, don’t harass anyone because of it.

Let me give some context first: I haven’t watched the full interview, and I might’ve spent way too much time on Twitter and Bluesky reading about this stuff. I still love Arcane, though. As someone who mostly posts Arcane content, I feel like I kind of have to respond to this, even if no one really cares.

About Jayvik:

Was there homoromantic subtext? Sure—if there wasn’t, people wouldn’t be shipping them this much. But to me, it feels like BBC Sherlock all over again: throwing in gay subtext without committing to it.

Honestly, there’s a simple way to handle this kind of situation: just say you didn’t intend for it to be read that way but can understand how people got that impression. That’s it. For some reason, though, Christian Linke doesn’t take that route—or at least, I haven’t seen him do so.

On Christian Linke

The main reason I’m writing this is to talk about Christian Linke, the co-creator of Arcane, who, apparently, is one of the worst people to disagree with on the internet. Let’s break it down by topic.

The Pitch

First, the quote he used. In this context, I could argue it’s okay to use the slur since it’s a quote, but you have to wonder: Why use that quote at all? There are so many other quotes to choose from, and he chose that one. It feels… weird.

As for the depiction of Zaun: maybe I’m misremembering, but the show doesn’t really lean into what he described in the pitch. The moral codes in Zaun seem pretty similar to those in Piltover. Sure, the chem-barons aren’t exactly moral, but neither is the Piltover council. Piltover is far from pure or righteous.

Let's talk about Viktor:

Apparently, Viktor is ace now. That kinda makes sense to me, but there was no hint of it in the show. It gives me “2007 Dumbledore is gay” vibes—except now it’s the German Twitch edition. And as many people have pointed out, gay asexual people exist too. So, framing it like this doesn’t really fix anything.

There’s also controversy about asexual disabled people, but I’m not comfortable commenting much on that since I’m neither disabled nor asexual. Still, it’s worth mentioning that people are discussing it. (Maybe this is related: Link 1 or Link 2).

Also apparently there is a joke from S1 that implies that he usually brings men to his room so yeah... so, there’s that.

Let's talk about Season 2:

Let’s just get this out of the way: Season 2 was rushed. That’s not really up for debate, and Christian himself confirmed it during Arcane Afterglow. The pacing feels weird in a lot of places. Was it entirely his fault? No, of course not. But certain moments, like “Timebomb” and the sex scene—even though I enjoyed at least one of them—feel like filler to either kill one of the main characters so you don't need to bother with them or cater to the majority of your audience.

Then there’s his cocky tweets and Reddit post.

Like, ok the show is good but I felt the same while watching Owl House, Avatar: Last Airbender, or anime like Koe no Katachi. I agree the fans aren’t owed anything, but the way he responds shows he has no PR training whatsoever.

If you have anything more share it with the class. I am closing Twitter because this discourse is killing my brain cells.

[cloudsbrainpopped]

💖🖤 for captain laserhawk

Okay okay so! These are always subject to change somewhat and. I have a dangerously high fever because SOMEONE. BROUGHT SOMETHING HOME. so I can barely think but. Yippie.

🖤 - which character isn’t as morally good as people think?

Well. I’ll just start by saying that 75% of these characters are pretty rough people with skewed morals so I’m sure it comes as no surprise to say Ramon. Yes, that final scene was cool as fuck, yes he was enjoyable even at his lowest. But that doesn’t change the shit he was peddling for at least 45 years for Eden. We saw the impact that his voice has had on the world around him. If it weren’t for him Sarah wouldn’t have turned out so messed up (and then get screwed over again because. She was also a victim of the system, who knows what Eden has done to her brain and what’s her and what’s not.) Ramon. Accidentally Created A Dictator. And god knows how many other impressionable children were impacted by him, whether they managed to break free or be another worst case scenario characters. Killing the board of directors doesn’t undo the cycle of near cultish patriotism that he’s facilitated over the years. Like Dolph, I’ll have to see him do more good post a change of heart to believe he’s actually a good Guy morally if that makes sense. ((We better see more of Dolph’s change of heart when we have more canon content but I digress this isn’t about him.

💖 Biggest Unpopular Opinion about the series?

I am genuinely not sure. I think most of my ‘hot takes’ are about things that aren’t even canon. Also these are a lot of mild takes. I think the main one is how I like how CLH stands on its own two feet given the downright blasphemous ways the original sources were treated at times. I’m pissed about. A few… select decisions myself I am not saying those decisions were good but at least they didn’t go on a ‘we’re really accurate’ tirade the way some adaptations do? It’s like an officially sanctioned crossover AU in my eyes (which has inspired a few things on my part.) I’m not sure really. I mean I’m pissed at Ubisoft, we all are. nfts are not the way to go and I fear they’re allergic to money, I like the things that most of yall like. Wait actually. I do have something else.

Okay so. The live action segment and everything surrounding it is genuinely the best part of the show. I discussed that scene for an Animation Essay. It is utilised so well. People who complain about it have not played any older games that hinge on realism/semi realism styles. Take the budget up with Ubisoft not that scene. Also in my research a lot of the people who hated the show skipped it??? So it’s either that disconnect or they really do not like Sarah at all and tbh I’m kind of annoyed about that. I’m certain the active fandom agrees that it’s absolutely unskipable. I’m not going to say anyone who skipped it and blames the art style hates women. Or women who just so happen to like women and just women but. Okay I am saying that but it’s mostly a joke. A little eyebrow raising if you will.

[ofromtheunderworld]

Tbh, I kinda like this new approach towards Moana now. I feel like it could be a major subplot within Moana 3, like with her discovering more powers and that she’s immortal now, with her debating if she’s wants to become a demigod or try to find a way to make her mortal again.

I feel like she would really struggle which to choose since she absolutely loves her people and her family and doesn’t want to outlive everyone, especially her younger sister who loves her to death. She cares so much about her people and her family that would be willing to fight gods for them. She is the chief (or future chief) of her people and she wants them all to be happy and thriving. But at the same time, she doesn’t want to Maui alone since he was on his own for most of his life.

This could easily create a struggle for Maui too if he realizes if Moana doesn’t want to be a demigod with him. When you think about Maui’s story, it’s actually very sad: His parents killed him right after birth because they didn’t want him, the gods gave him a second chance at life and raised him to become a demigod, he did everything for the humans to become wanted, but that want for acceptance led for him to steal the heart for the humans, which led to the destruction of many islands and tribes and caused him to be in isolation for HUNDREDS OF YEARS.

Moana was the same thing to him in his eyes like all those other tribes: wanting Maui to help her with something. But when they got to know each other, he finally has someone who cares about him. Someone who can get serious yet silly with him. Someone who’s he worries about losing. Something that he possibly never truly had before.

A friend.

He was completely against her coming onto the trip this time, not because he didn’t want to deal with her, but because he doesn’t want her to DIE. You seen the way he was crying when he found out that Moana died at the end of the movie. She was the first human who he interacted with for years and possibly the only friend he ever had in his life. So I imagine when he fully realizes that she can’t die anymore and can fully live with him forever, he would be more than thrilled.

So you could imagine what this struggle could cause for the both of them. Maui would have to comprehend the fact that the person that he’s closest to could possibly not want to join him in the deity life and he may still be on his own for the rest of his life and Moana would have the bigger struggle to deal with and the bigger question to answer: “Do I abandon Maui and the new demigod life that I was given for my people and my family or do I abandon my people and family, INCLUDING my little sister, for my best friend?”

We could have multiple ways this could play out in the 3rd movie: Maui and Moana arguing over this topic and almost causing them to fallout of their friendship, Maui and Moana wanting the other to be happy and doesn’t want to make things more difficult for each other while fighting their own inner demons, Moana fully accepting the deity life but she has to teach her family and people why she chose the path (Which could lead to a whole spiral of problems, especially with Simea), etc.

I could see either one of the endings playing out with Moana either becoming fully mortal again or staying as a demigod, (Unless they pull something completely random out of their ass, like idk, Maui becoming a full mortal again) and it would be very interesting to see how everything plays out in the 3rd movie. I’m kinda excited for Moana 3 now just with this subplot alone, let alone about Nalo being a major villain in the 3rd movie, and let’s just hope that whatever Disney chooses that it’s written correctly in a likable way for the audience and not washed down by a bunch of unnecessary jokes.

moana being immortal now really fucks me up like you're telling me she's going to watch simea grow up and older than her? I'm supposed to be normal about the fact that moana will never return to the sea, to her ancestors, the way everyone she knows and loves will? you mean to say that someday maui will be her only companion, the only one in her life who won't grow old and die? am i understanding correctly that death, originally her biggest obstacle, is now just pretty much off the table for her?

[astroduck]

“Don’t kill innocent civilians!”

“Ok, I won’t kill the innocent civilians”

[thepersonperson]

Sukuna is Peak Gap Moe. I’ll never be over this. This bastard talks tough, eats people, and kills like a woodchipper and yet…he is a poetic little sap. Getting mad over an improper haikus, the misidentification of flowers…and confessing his feelings to Gojo Satoru under several layers of wordplay no one except those well-versed in ancient Japanese would catch.

I've been over this in greater detail in Sukuna's Negative Rizz, but @tangsakura added more context in the replies to that post, making Sukuna's use of 凡夫 (bonpu) for Gojo even gayer.

In summary, 凡夫 (bonpu) can be translated as painfully ordinary or unenlightened. But in the individual kanji readings, 凡 is mediocre and 夫 is husband. You could read this as Sukuna calling Gojo his mediocre husband. And that's just the modern readings! The ancient readings...

So you can read this line from Sukuna as the following:

“You were born in an era without me and hailed as 'The Strongest'

1) And yet you turned out to be…painfully ordinary.”

2) And yet you turned out to be…unenlightened.”

3) And yet you turned out to be…a mediocre husband/wife/spouse.”

4) And yet you turned out to be…the ordinary one who could stand by my side.”

Sukuna seems to be saying these things all at once. (It’s no different than the Megumi Activities wordplay he uses with Enchain. Alt. link if the Twitter dies.) Gojo apparently makes him feel very conflicted. He’s boring, he can do better, he shouldn’t even call himself the Honored One, he’s his equal, they’re married. The irony here is that no one except Sukuna can understand this.

[crushedsweets]

Toby specifically stalks this elderly lesbian couple because one of them started spouting off nonsense about demons and slendy wants them to stop poking their noses in the paranormal.

Toby decides to purposefully make it obvious they’re being stalked by a real person instead of haunted, but he just further convinces both of them that they have a demon in their home. Nothing he does works and he doesn’t really wanna kill them. Starts sending them emails saying giving the demons attention gives them more power.

The ladies give ignoring the “demon” a shot, so he stops purposefully breaking into their house and moving stuff around and scaring them. Now they truly believing ignoring a demon is how to stop a haunting. They no longer stick their nose in the paranormal. This is a successful Toby mission. And he stole a lot of money and jewelry in the process. Extra Toby points

[stoat-party]

Obviously it has ethical implications but I do love the idea of X6 hanging around post-Institute and dropping Danse’s shutdown code in the middle of conversations. As a power play.

Like, oh that’s an excellent point, sir, but what if instead you went night night for awhile?

[ahalliance]

how do i turn qantoine’s spontaneous marriage proposal to qetoiles into evidence of his early-days fear of qfrench drifing away and keeping secrets from one another

[willowways]

I hate a “starving kids in Africa” ass bitch

[harlowehearse]

Thinking about Skin-taker and Poppy again they’re LITERALLY the most petty old dudes alive like why do you gotta drag everyone else into your divorce drama.

[fappellmoan]

WHY R PEOPLE SO MADDDDDDD THIS YEAR ABOUT A RYAN PIC

[tariah23]

Now he’s trying to lie when he literally tagged Princeton like 5 fucking time. White people are so evil, bro. They always know what they’re doing when they do shit like that. With the attempt to bring harm to Black people who they want to “get out of the way,” because they don’t think that we belong in the same spaces as them while at the same time, believing they should be allowed INTO our spaces and afforded hospitality and a whole red carpet rolled out. The sad thing is, she has connections to the industry because of her uncle and name so what if this was just a random Black woman who worked for Princeton without this kind of protection at all…?

[lucydacusgirl]

Btw if you’re weird about cyclists I will block with abandon unless it’s funny enough. In places with the infrastructure to support cycling and places with decent public transport there need to be less cars on the road. I’m not even saying no cars but dramatically less. For the climate and for air quality and for safety. It’s cars that make roads dangerous for everyone not cyclists.

[crossbackpoke-check]

V random but I’m in my Brockpetey feels could I listen to your 46 60 playlist!!

of course!! the first playlist i mentioned in the tags is actually not mine—it belongs to ash @notthequiettype and is a soundtrack to their wonderful fic Lake Rules (go read it if you haven’t already!!! highly recommend!!!)

annnd this one is my personal brockpetey vibes playlist

happy listening!!!

[paddockbunny]

I also HATE when guys ghost you because you don’t live 5 minutes from their house! This guy ghosted me after getting my number because he “thought” a 30 minute journey was too much! Maybe that’s why your single. You sure ain’t shit finding anything in your wee small town love.