#it was literally the only scar add-on i could find that actually went over his eye

[an-abyss-of-stars]

Felt like showing off my Sims version of Modern!Aemond...like PLEASE I'M SO PROUD 💀💀

[s1m0nth3swag]

Kinktober 2024 - Gun Kink with Leon S. Kennedy

Hello hi its a little late but here's week 2 of kinktober

This one is slightly self indulgent because I love hot men with guns :)

If you like my writing and wanna support me a little, please visit my Ko-Fi! Thanks in advance <3

WARNINGS/ CONTENT INFO: NSFW, guns, slight degrading, Leon's not actually into Guns just the reader, GN!Reader

Sometimes, Leon hated his job. Actually, most times. He really hated it. Not only because of the everyday potential to literally die, but because the missions kept him away from home for so long. He used to be okay with that, it didn't matter to him, he used to not have anything that kept him at home - unless one counted his comfy bed. By now, he had you. The two of you had met a year or two after he started working for the DSO, and at first Leon really didn't want to get close to you. You were so sweet to him, so pure, he knew he would ruin you if he got too close. You on the other hand couldn't help but get closer. In your defence, Leon looked like a sad puppy whenever you saw him, and you just felt the need to help him out. Very much ‘I can fix him’ fashion. You had snaked your way into his heart, slowly but surely invaded his mind, until he just had to ask you out. Now you two were going on two years, had moved in with each other and even adopted a puppy. Every time he went on a mission, all he could think about was wanting to get back to you safe and in one piece, every time he got hurt he prayed to God it wouldn't leave an ugly scar - even though the ones he did have were cherished by you. You said they reminded you of the fact that he did come back, and that he would continue to do so.

Today, luckily, he only had to go into the office for some paperwork. Didn't mean he didn't at least dislike it, though. He wanted to spend his time cuddled up with you, pressing his lips against every piece of skin he could reach. The thought alone made him sigh. It was already so late, he bet you were cuddled up on the couch with your dog, watching whatever was on TV while waiting for him to come back. At least his salary allowed you an easy life. His day honestly kept dragging on, at least until his phone buzzed with a notification from you.

‘I got us something so we can try smth new :)’ it read, and Leon was quite puzzled. ‘What do you mean?’ He texts back, only to be left on read by you. Jesus, you and your weird ideas. Still, he can't help but work a little faster, uncaring if he suddenly works sloppy.

It's not that late as he steps back into your shared apartment, sighing heavily as he rids himself of his jacket, hanging it to the other ones before throwing off his shoes. He calls out for you, your puppy already tapping over to him to receive some cuddles. He picks up the small canine, making his way through the apartment to find you. At last, he arrives in the bedroom, seeing you sit at the edge of the bed, a literal gun in your hands.

“Whoa, easy there darling, what's that for?” Leon says, his voice laced with shock. He was always under the presumption that you were the last person to need a gun, especially since you had him for protection. “Don't be like that, it's a fake.” You huff, a grin on your lips as you look over at him, eyes practically sparkling. “Cool, isn't it?” You add, holding it out to him. Leon lets the small puppy down, stepping towards you so he could take the gun. He examines it for a moment, and now that he can see it up close, with his trained eyes, it's clear it's fake. He shakes his head slightly. “Still didn't answer what's it for.” He grumbles. “Us, duh. I figured it'd be… I dunno, intriguing.” You answer, one of your hands coming up to tug Leon closer by a belt loop. “...In the bedroom?” Leon clarifies, raising a brow once you nod. “Jesus you're crazy. You don't actually want me to point a gun at you? Or the other way around?” He scowls, clearly not into the idea. “No, no not like that.” You sigh. “More like… the thrill of a gun being involved. Plus you kinda… well you look hot handling them.” your voice is barely above a soft whisper at that point. It's embarrassing how attractive you think he is, even when just barely holding a prop gun. A little pathetic, to be honest.

“So… more like this?” Leon questions, using the barrel to tilt your chin up slightly. Your cheeks flush at the coldness of the metal, and the action alone makes your knees go weak. You're glad you're sitting down, but Leon notices nonetheless. After so long, he can basically read every single of your slightest movements. “You're actually into this.” He states with slight disbelief, trailing the gun down your throat. Your breath catches as you keep your gaze firmly on him. “Jesus…” Leon mutters, stepping to stand in front of you properly. He really isn't sure what to think of this, he's happy to give you your pleasure, but he still doesn't like the whole thing of desensitising you to him holding a literal weapon, no matter if this one is fake. Nonetheless, the look you give him is enough for him to continue. You want this, badly at that, and who is he to not give it to you?

Moments later Leon's got you laid over the bed, puppy thrown out and door locked for double measure. He's already rid you of your clothing, tracing the cold metal of the gun down your chest and abdomen. He's lazy with it, sometimes tracing lines, sometimes slight patterns, though with no particular motive other than watching you squirm. You don't want to beg just yet, you already feel pathetic enough like this, you don't need to give him the extra achievement of making you beg within minutes. So, Leon just does whatever, never getting close to where you so desperately want him to be. He lets the muzzle grace your thighs once, you whine at the sensation before he chuckles into your ear, retreating the gun back to your chest. “Lee…” you mutter with a soft pout, giving in. “please… just fuck me, yeah..? I've been good…” you hum, turning your head to press soft kisses against his jawline. “Just waited for you to ask, love.” Leon responds, ever so slowly tracing the gun down your body in a straight line. “You're so mean sometimes..” you grumble as he casually angles one of your legs to have better access.

You almost yelp as the metal glides against your entrance, teasing ever so slightly. “Leon..!” You huff, trying to shoot your boyfriend a glare, though your brain quickly focuses back on the feeling of the gun as Leon pushes it inside softly. “Taking it so well, aren't you?” He grins, pressing a kiss against your cheek as he slowly pushes it in fully, until the trigger guard also presses against your skin. You whine slightly, the metal quickly heating up from being inside you, still, the coldness from the start lingers in your mind. Leon rocks the gun into you for a while, watching your reactions in amusement. Usually, he'd enjoy watching you come undone on his dick, but honestly, this wasn't half bad either. You're awfully turned on by this whole situation, and Leon can't help but feel a little bit hungry about it. If he had known you get this turned on by guns, of all things, he would have brought some if his home to clean sometimes. “Such a slut, aren't you?” He teases, nipping at the skin of your neck slightly. You clench around the gun, your orgasm approaching faster than you'd like to admit. Leon reads all your little signs, trailing his free hand over your side in a featherlight touch, before gripping your hip, tugging you against him a bit more, pushing the gun a little more harshly, letting it rest inside for a moment. Meanwhile, his other hand trails to your core, working on it swiftly, with practiced movement that makes you see stars. You seriously can't help but cum, all of this was just too much for you in the best way possible. Leon huffs, pulling the gun out of you. “Made such a mess, baby.” He mumbles, placing kisses against your neck. “Don't think we need this thing for the next round, though.” He grins, casually throwing the gun on the ground before letting you catch your breath for round two.

[lieslab]

Love is a spider

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎ ꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

Pairing: og8 X gn reader

Genre: Comfort/hurt

Word Count: 9.5K

A/N: To the requester, I may have went a bit overboard by a bit. Can you blame me? Anyway, in these drabbles, you're a bit of a people pleaser and the guys kind of clock you for it. Some of them are softer than others. Hyunjin's is a little angsty because a little angst adds some spice.

I'm so sorry this is out a little later than planned. I have had literally one of the worst weeks of the entire year. I hope that never happens again. Never fear, life goes on and we keep trudging along. I hope everyone is slaying and finding their own versions of happiness. It's almost over now, but happy six years to the band!!

You can ignore the rest of this, but I'm going to ramble because people pleasing can really suck. I wish brains weren't wired that way because people pleasing is not the least bit swell when it's destroying you from the inside out. Some of you baddies out there need to hear that it's okay to put up boundaries and focus on your own happiness.

I wish someone would have screamed that in my face at some point when I was younger. It is okay and normal to put up boundaries. It is not okay for people to walk all over you, belittle you, and cause you mental or physical harm. You are allowed to take up space.

There is one quote that says "stop breaking yourself down into bite-sized pieces. Stay whole and let them choke." I love that quote. I used to be one of the biggest people pleasers around and it made me so miserable to the point where I quite literally had a full mental breakdown. We're only meant for so much until we break.

Practice makes perfect and the more you practice saying no, the better you get at it. The better you get, the easier it is to reinforce boundaries. The stronger the boundaries, the more strength you have, the easier it is to say no. It's so much easier said than done, but I swear, once you start it, it makes life so much easier.

Also the title of this drabble is inspired by the song 'Spider' by Kai Bosch. It's so good and actually one of my favorites at the moment. I keep looping it because that's how much I like it. Now that I've rambled, please enjoy <3

_ _ _

Chan:

Dating Chan had its pros and cons. On one hand, you never had a better relationship with anyone before. Since he was so used to being out in public and interacting with multiple different people, Chan wasn’t afraid of your romantic relationship. 

He knew what he wanted and he communicated everything perfectly. Every want, every need, every like, and every dislike, you knew them. On the other hand, you were still figuring out how relationships worked properly. The last romantic relationship you fell into, it left you scarred in more ways than one. 

That’s why it took you so long to finally agree to meeting the rest of Chan’s band. It was a huge step outside your comfort zone. The whole day, Chan had been gushing and practically bouncing on the balls of his feet. 

You weren’t just nervous, you were terrified. Your stomach churned uncomfortably with anxiety. You kept zoning out and internally freaking out. There were so many thoughts inside your head. 

What if they didn’t like you? What if you made an awful first impression? What if you screwed something up and made a fool out of yourself? What if they thought you were insufferable? On and on, the thoughts spiraled out of control. 

Before you knew it, Chan was driving you to his dorm. It was the place where he figured you’d be the most comfortable. Plus, the guys could scatter about and do their own things. All the attention didn’t have to be on you. 

It seemed to be going alright for the first few minutes. Chan introduced all the guys to you and a few minutes later, you needed to use the bathroom. Glancing around for Chan, he had moved out into the kitchen to help Lee Know and Felix with cooking. 

Left alone amongst the other guys, you sucked in a deep breath trying to contain your inner panic. A few feet away, Han picked up on your discomfort and asked if you were alright. Upon realizing that he knew your mood, you quickly apologized. 

He brushed it off and more time went by. Eventually, you were led to the bathroom. When you came out, you bumped straight into Seungmin. Apologies flew out of your mouth rather quickly. He laughed and brushed it off. 

You apologized multiple times throughout the night, even when apologies weren’t needed. Like the time you accidentally spilled your drink. When you sat in a seat that was apparently reserved for Jeongin. When you grabbed a paper towel for Chan and accidentally tore a rip across it. 

Chan knew you struggled with anxiety sometimes, but as the night went on, he started realizing just how much you were apologizing. Every time you did it, you looked terrified, almost like you’d be yelled at or lectured. It was to the point where it was getting concerning. 

Felix made brownies for dessert. While eating one of them, crumbs fell on your shirt. When Hyunjin pointed them out and began laughing, along with an added joke from Seungmin, you looked like you were about to cry. 

Beside you, Chan shot the two of them a warning glare to knock it off. They quickly changed the subject to taunting Jeongin for a terrible dance move he performed during practice. The attention went off of you and onto the three of them. 

While the guys were distracted, Chan grabbed your hand and tugged you into the safety of his room. It smelled like the cologne he always wore. Comfort flooded your system easily. 

“I’m really sorry,” you started after a few moments. 

Chan frowned, feeling confused, “for what?”

“For messing up this thing with the guys. I understand if you want to break up with me. Actually, I can just let myself out.” You reached an arm out and headed towards the door. 

Chan leaned forward and grabbed your wrist gently. “Baby, what are you talking about? You haven’t messed anything up.” 

“I’m a mess. I’ve ruined so many things tonight. I’m sorry, I-” A lump began to form in your throat. 

Chan gently pushed a finger towards your lips. “Why are you apologizing so much? You haven’t done anything wrong.” 

You moved your head away with a sniffle. “Yes, I have. I’ve done dumb things and made people uncomfortable. Apologizing is the right thing to do.” 

“Made people uncomfortable? You haven’t hurt anyone’s feelings.” 

“I took Jeongin’s chair for dinner.” 

“That’s not a big deal, baby. The guys never have assigned seats. They were just screwing around like they always do. Did something happen somewhere that made you feel like you always have to apologize?” 

“But it’s the right thing to do.” 

“Yeah, when the time is right. You don’t need to apologize over the small things, sweetheart.” 

“The last person I dated kind of made me feel really shitty a lot. They didn’t like a lot of the things that I did and they weren’t afraid to tell me.” 

“So…you apologized?” Chan guessed with a raised eyebrow. 

You nodded. 

“From now on, you’re not allowed to apologize for little things. Every time you apologize for something little during the rest of the night, I’m kissing you in front of the guys.” 

“We can’t do that! I’m sorry, but w-”  You were cut off with soft lips against your own for a few moments. When Chan pulled away, your cheeks were dark red. You swallowed and tried to regain your composure. 

“Aw, you’re so cute when you blush. I guess you’d better stop apologizing, I mean, unless you want the guys to see us kissing.” A teasing grin began to stretch across his face. 

Without even thinking about it, you reached up and playfully slapped his chest. Realizing what you did, panic flooded your face. “Fuck, I’m so sorry! I-” 

You were cut off once again by his lips against yours. 

_ _ _

Minho:

With a sigh, Minho kicked off his shoes and placed his car and house key onto the stand by the door. He jerked off his jacket and hung it up on a hanger. Trying to be as quiet as possible, he crept towards your shared bedroom door. 

His feet slid over the floor through the darkened house. His fingers grabbed the brass knob to the bedroom and he slowly opened it. The soft hum of the fan filled the air. The room was pitch dark. He pushed the door open further and stepped inside. 

“Minho?” Your voice called out. You popped up out of your bundle of blankets and turned on the bedside lamp. Both of you blinked at the sudden brightness. 

“You’re up?” He asked. “You’re seriously up, again? Baby, it’s really late and you have work early in the morning. I know you want to see me, but you need to get some sleep.” 

“I know, but I wanted to see you.” A frown filled your face. “I missed you so much and I just couldn’t wait.” 

He moved over to the dresser and pulled out a pair of pajamas. You watched his bare back as he ripped off his shirt and slid into a different one. Realizing you were staring after a few seconds, you averted your eyes. “So how was your day?” 

“It was alright,” he shrugged. 

“You’re not going to give me the specifics?” 

“Nope. Not now. We can talk about that in the morning. Right now, you need to get some sleep.” 

“But I-” 

“Nope. Have you seen yourself lately? You look like you’re sleep deprived.” 

“But I’m not!” You tried to argue back. 

“Is that why you keep taking naps on the weekends?” 

“Well…” You couldn’t fight back because he got you there. Staying up after midnight really was taking a toll considering that you had to be up at six in the morning. The days you stayed up later, you struggled through exhaustion. 

Lately, you spent your days nursing coffee and energy drinks, trying to bring back the momentum, but they could only do so much. Recently, it seemed like you were more irritable and Minho was right. Brown bags sat beneath your eyes, your energy was low, and your co-workers kept making sure you were alright. 

“I don’t want to make you unhappy,” you finally got out. “I really love you, you know? You usually look really excited when I’m still up. I like greeting you when you get home. I just want to make you happy.” 

Minho headed over towards the bed, pulled down the blankets, and slipped beside you. “You make me happy in a lot of ways and I love you too. Trust me, you won’t hurt my feelings if you’re sleeping when I get home. In fact, I want you to be sleeping.” 

“I love seeing you, but you look really cute when you’re asleep too. Imagine if you woke up in my arms. That sounds so exciting. Imagine you get enough sleep and you wake up to me holding you. The perks? You get enough sleep and I get to snuggle you.” 

“And you’re okay with that? Because I could continue to stay up and I-” 

He leaned up and lightly flicked your nose. “You need to get some sleep before your co-workers show up at our house. Yesterday, you said you were really freaking one guy out because you kept falling asleep while standing up.” 

You finally nodded in agreement. He tugged you towards his chest and plopped down on his pillow. “When we wake up, we’ll have the most amazing breakfast and I’ll tell you all about my day and you can tell me about your day.” 

“Promise?” You asked. 

He nodded and shut his eyes. You laid there soaking in his warmth until you shifted. You shut your eyes, but nothing happened. You shifted again and again until Minho opened his eyes again. “What are you doing?” 

“I can’t get comfortable and my brain won’t shut off.” 

“Probably because I came home an hour earlier tonight. Your body is used to going to bed around the time I come home later.” 

“I can’t help it!” You huffed clearly annoyed as your lips stuck out in a pout. “I feel like something is missing, but I don’t know what.” 

“Maybe if you wouldn’t have been a brat and stayed up until I got home,” he started. 

You stuck your tongue out at him and shifted again. Silence filled the room as the two of you tried to sleep. After a few more minutes, you jerked into a sitting up position. Beside you, Minho frowned with his eyes closed. “I think you’re right, something is missing.” 

You thought about it for a while before your eyes widened. You jerked off the blankets and scrambled to get out of the bed. Beside you, Minho finally sat up and watched you nearly faceplant as you left. “Where are you going?” 

“We forgot to get the cats!” 

“The cats?” His face twisted in confusion. “The ca- Holy shit! We forgot the cats!” He shoved off his own blankets and scrambled after you. 

Twenty minutes later, the two of you were sound asleep. Snuggled in different parts of the blankets were Soonie, Doongie, and Dori. The five of you fell asleep rather quickly comforted by the warmth of one another and the tranquility that transpired around the room.

_ _ _

Changbin:

During the first week that you dated Changbin, you bought him a shirt he mentioned he wanted to you in passing. When he unwrapped the soft pink wrapping paper and he unraveled the shirt, the happiness sparkling in his eyes locked in your brain. 

During the second week of your relationship, he mentioned he really liked a new drink that he found at the grocery store. When he joked that it was the only thing he wanted to drink from now on, you took that seriously. You bought him multiple packs of it to keep in his dorm refrigerator. 

When the second week wrapped into the third, you bought him a new pair of Airpods because he lost the last pair. You couldn’t stand his frown and how bummed he was about it. When you replaced the exact case that he had also lost, he nearly hugged you to death. 

He didn’t realize what you were doing at first. At first, he thought your actions were cute. He knew some people showed their love through giving gifts. Sure, he felt a little guilty about it, but you looked so happy when you handed them to him. You were practically a little ball of sunshine that he couldn’t resist. 

The last thing you got him, you took your time wrapping it, and you brought it straight into the JYP recording studio. You knew that he’d be there finishing up his recordings. As you were going in with your box, Chan and Han were coming out. 

“Oh,” Han’s eyes lit up, “what’s that?” 

“I bet it’s another gift,” Chan teased. 

“Wow, Changbin is so lucky.” 

“You really know how to spoil him rotten.” 

You laughed and responded. After talking for a few more moments, the two walked off to head back to their dorm. Apparently, Changbin was still inside finishing up the last few lyrics of a song. 

You knocked a few times before you pushed open the door. Changbin was in a black t-shirt with a face mask tucked beneath his chin. His eyes were narrowed down in a notebook and his pencil scribbled rapidly. “What did you forget this time?” 

“Uh…nothing?” 

“Oh!” His face lit up. “It’s you! Hi, baby! Give me a moment to finish writing these lyrics. How did you get inside? I didn’t think security would have let you in.” 

“Well, they probably wouldn’t have, but Felix was talking to the security guard when I came up. He told him to let me in because the two of us were dating. The security guard seemed hesitant, but Felix does what Felix does best.” 

“Melts the hearts of everyone around him with his angelic being?” 

“Yeah, something like that.” You laughed and placed the wrapped box down on the studio couch. Changbin continued scribbling for a bit and you stood patiently with your hands folded in front of you. 

“Alright, I’m finished!” He pushed his chair away from the wooden desk he was crouched over and glanced back towards you. “Should we go get dinn- oh, what’s that?” 

“It’s a present.” 

“That looks like an awfully big present. Should I be scared?” He raised an eyebrow as he studied the light green wrapping paper. There was a big silver bow on the top of it. 

“I think you’re really going to like it.” You picked it up and handed it to him. He was shocked by just how big it was. The thing easily fit across the length of his lap. 

He hesitated before he grabbed a piece of the folded paper along the side. A loud rip filled the air as he jerked it. At first, his face lit up as he revealed the internal packaging, but it didn’t take long before his face fell. 

You purchased him the lego set that he had been admiring in the window of your latest trip to the mall. The lego set was pretty big and it easily cost a couple hundred bucks. At first the gesture was sweet, but this was too much. 

“You don’t like it?” Your voice came out softly. 

“No, no, no! I-I do, but I…” He sighed and sucked in a deep breath. “Baby, why do you buy me so many gifts?” His eyes went up to meet yours. There was genuine curiosity on his face. 

“You don’t like the gifts?” 

“I do like the gifts, but I’m starting to think you’re spending way too much money on me. Why do you feel the need to buy me so many gifts? A lot of what you’ve been buying costs quite a bit of money. I don’t want you to waste your hard earned money on me.” 

“I’m not wasting my money on you.” You suddenly felt like the size of a grape. All that happiness and joy in your heart, all that excitement slipped out of your heart like a deflated balloon. “I just wanna make you happy.” 

“Honey, you make me feel like the luckiest man in the world, even without these big gifts. I like that you want to make me feel happy, but this,”  he tapped the box of legos, “this is too much. I feel bad for receiving this. This costed so much of your money.” 

You couldn’t help it, tears filled your eyes. He instantly frowned and shifted. You frantically blinked trying to keep them from falling, but they dripped onto your cheeks. You wiped them away as Changbin placed the legos onto the floor. He leaned over and pulled you close to him. 

“Hey, hey, hey, please don’t cry. I didn’t mean to make you cry. That’s the last thing I ever wanted to do. I don’t want you to spend all this money on me. I want you to spend all this money on you. I want you to be selfish for yourself.” 

He wiped more fallen tears and tugged you onto his lap. You sniffled and allowed him to. “Why do you feel like you need to buy me such large items?” 

“I-I don’t know. I guess I just feel like I’m not good enough. Maybe if I buy you things you really like, maybe you’ll stick around. Maybe I can buy your love and I-” 

“Woah, woah, woah. Buy my love?” He gently cupped your cheeks between his hands. “Sweetheart, you don’t need to buy my love. Not at all! I’m with you because I love you. I wouldn’t be with someone if I didn’t like them.” 

“I’m afraid you’ll leave,” you whispered. 

His heart broke even more and he shook his head. “If I was ever thinking about leaving you, I’d bring it up to you. I wouldn’t keep you in the dark about anything like that. Relationships are very serious things and I’d never shut you out or try to hurt your feelings on purpose. Never.” 

“So no more gifts?” You asked. 

“Well, I won’t say that. You seem like you really like giving gifts, right?” 

You nodded your head. He wiped his thumbs beneath your eyes again. “If you’d like to give me gifts, how about something small? Like maybe one of my favorite snacks? Or you could do something else.” 

“Like?”

“We could go on adventures together. We can go half and half and go on fun dates. Hyunjin just recently told me about a couple’s private pottery class that his pottery teacher hosts. How about something like that? We’ll make memories together, have fun, and we’ll have a shared experience.” 

“I guess that does sound pretty good.” 

He smiled and gently poked your cheek trying to cheer you up even more. You blushed and couldn’t help, but smile back. Your eyes went down to the lego set beside your feet. “Are you really going to make me take it back?” 

“Why not?” 

“Because I really want you to have it and I spent good money on that. Plus, I don’t want to go back to the mall. They’re going to ask why I want to return it and I’m not good at lying. I don’t want to admit that my boyfriend didn’t want it.” 

“Well…” Changbin’s eyes followed yours. “It is a really cool lego set and you did spend a bunch on it. I would like you to take it back, but I will admit that it’d look super cool in my room.”

“So will you keep it just this once?” 

He sighed before he caved. “I suppose, but this is it! If you do something like this again, I’m forcing you to take it back. I’ll hold your hand and drag you into the store. I’ll make it as dramatic as possible, so you’ll be too embarrassed to ever do it again.” 

Your cheeks went red again as you nodded in agreement. Changbin’s gaze went back up to you. “So how about we take this back to my dorm with the rest of the guys? I’ll order us food and we can put this together. Maybe we can have the other guys help us because this is going to take hours.” 

“That sounds like fun.” 

“Maybe even a full year to put together.” 

“I don’t think that’s how this works.” 

“You don’t know that. What if it takes a century? How about a millennium?” 

“Okay, now you’re just being dramatic.” 

“I can’t help it!” He tossed his hands in the air. “I live with Hyunjinnie! What did you expect to happen? 3racha doesn’t just rub off on Hyunjin, he rubs off on us too!” 

_ _ _

Hyunjin:

“You’re being such a fucking bitch!” 

They were just words, but it might as well have been a slap in the face. The look of hurt on your face was one that Hyunjin would never forget as he stormed out of the apartment and slammed the door after him. He slammed it hard enough that the walls shook. 

You shut your eyes and sucked in a deep breath trying not to cry. You were under a lot of stress from work and he was under stress from some stupid controversy that had happened with his band. It was a minor thing, but the management team was grilling all of them behind the scenes. 

The argument was just a simple miscommunication on both your ends. You were both irritated and frustrated due to external factors. It wasn’t much of a surprise when the two of you started to argue, but you didn’t think it’d get this far. 

With your head down, you walked over to the couch. You collapsed onto it and curled your head into the arm. The mixture of high strung emotions whirled into a tornado and now both of you were hurt. Your heart ached due to the cursing and all Hyunjin could feel was guilt. 

You cried and cried and cried until you ended up crying yourself to sleep in the living room. Outside, Hyunjin went on a walk trying to clear his head. He couldn’t believe he had said something like that to you. He was absolutely gutted about it. 

If there was an award for the world’s shittiest boyfriend, he’d have it in the bag. He couldn’t believe he fucked up this badly and it was absolutely unforgivable. His brain started to spiral out of control. 

What if you broke up with him? What if you never wanted to see him again? What if you went to the public and released this information to the press and the fans? He nearly had himself in tears as he took off running back towards the apartment. God, what would his band members think? They’d never forgive him for this. 

Nearly tripping over his feet, soaked in sweat, he shoved open the door and rushed inside. He walked through the brightly lit living room and was about to head towards your room until he found you curled up into a ball on the edge of the leather couch. 

For the first few moments, he was smitten. Your back moved up and down slowly as soft snores came from your mouth. He couldn’t have been outside longer than twenty minutes. 

It was quickly ripped apart when he remembered what he did. Remembering it was like a knife fileted across his stomach. He sucked in a deep breath, moved over to you, and gently shook your shoulder. He softly called your name trying to get you to wake up. 

You shifted at the touch and hummed softly. Your eyelashes were clumped together from tears. When you jerked your head and blearily opened your eyes, Hyunjin’s heart crumbled at the sight of your bloodshot eyes. 

“Baby?” His voice called out softly. He gently stretched a hand out towards you. He held his breath waiting for your reaction. 

“Hmm?” 

He sat down beside you quickly and tugged you into his lap. “I’m so sorry for yelling at you. I’m so sorry for calling you a bitch. I-I don’t know how to make it up to you, but it’ll never happen again.” His eyes became glossier as he spoke. His voice wavered as if he was on the verge of tears.  

“It’s fine,” you weakly got out. “We were both upset and you snapped. It’s not a big deal.” 

“But it is a big deal. I hurt you terribly and said something that never should have come out of my mouth. Darling, I’m so, so, so sorry.” 

“I’ve been called worse,” you mumbled. You were still half asleep with your head on his chest. “I was kinda being a bitch, so you weren’t wrong.” 

“No, you weren’t! I was being an asshole. Please don’t ever accept me calling you names. Never accept anyone calling you names. It’s pathetic and it’s low. You’re so much better than that.” 

“Not really,” you shook your head, “it’s okay, seriously.” 

Tears dripped down Hyunjin’s cheeks. Not only had he done the unimaginable, but now he realized you had low self-esteem. He shook his head, unable to accept your words. 

“No, it’s not okay. You are beautiful and you are lovely. You are a wonderful person and you’re very intelligent. You’re someone I can’t live without and, best of all, you’re my muse. I’m so sorry that I hurt you.” 

“I-” 

He cut you off, “no. You don’t get to say mean things about yourself. You don’t get to accept what I told you. I was a fucking piece of shit and I hate that I can’t take back the words. I’m sorry, so please, if it’s okay with you, just let me hold you for a while.” 

The tears were back in your own eyes as you nodded. You had been called a variety of names in your lifetime. Once upon a time, with an awful friend, you accepted every awful thing they said about you. You were too afraid to stand up for yourself, so you took in the words constantly. 

You heard them so much that you began to believe them. Internally, those words had damaged you far more than you’d ever admit. There were thorns in your heart that still jutted out. 

Sure, Hyunjin’s words and the actions that followed, they really were wrong. Nothing he could say could take them back, but, at least, he was trying to make it right. You couldn’t stand the way he looked with tears in his eyes. 

You adjusted yourself and wrapped around his torso like a koala. He hugged you against his chest tight and rested his head on top of yours. He was so glad that you were still here and were willing to hear him out. 

_ _ _

Han:

“I’m really sorry,” you got out with a grimace. “I know, I know I shouldn’t, but she’s my friend. I can’t leave her hanging all alone. She’s a mom now and I bet that’s really exhausting.” 

Han frowned while watching you lace up your shoes. For the third time, you were canceling the date that the two of you were supposed to go on. All he wanted to do was spend time with you, but your friend kept taking advantage of your kindness. 

It was okay, at first, and he understood. Parenting could be hard and it was healthy to take breaks. However, your friend kept constantly asking you to watch her kid. She never paid you for it and she asked in the spur of the moment. There was never time to preplan anything which kept throwing off what you had with Han. 

Your boyfriend’s patience and understanding only went so far. In your eyes, you were trying to be a good friend. In his eyes, you were being used as a free babysitter because your friend didn’t want to deal with the responsibility of having a kid. It was frustrating and it was annoying, especially when it kept ruining your date nights. 

“I’ll be back later,” you managed to get out. You were starting to feel upset about the situation yourself. Dealing with a baby, one that was only a few months old, was a lot of work. 

After being at work all day, you wanted to lie down and cuddle with Han. You wanted to go with him to do some low energy activity and then come back home and cuddle. Both of you were introverted and you liked it that way. 

Dating an introvert was the best decision you ever made. Sure, occasionally, the two of you liked to go do something you both enjoyed. Most of your time was spent at home where you were relaxed. You weren’t overstimulated and you weren’t overwhelmed. 

“What’s the reasoning this time?” Han grumbled, unable to stop himself from being bitter. He was tired of your friend’s bullshit. If she wanted you to watch her kid so much, the least she could do was pay you. 

“Um…” You trailed off knowing that your response would upset him. 

“Is it something dumb?” 

“I-I guess,” you shrugged, “she wants to go to the bar.” 

“Are you being serious?” He whined. “Baby, that’s not fair! She can wait until the weekend to get plastered, it’s literally only Tuesday! I made restaurant reservations in an hour and now I have to move them again!” 

“I’m really sorry, but she’s my friend.” 

“She’s using you!” 

“But she ju-” 

“Why are you making excuses for her? You know that I’m right. This isn’t helping your relationship with her. You’re not getting paid for this either. You’re babysitting her child and now, when she gets home, you’ll have to babysit her too because she’s going to come home drunk.”

“What am I supposed to do? She’s my friend! I can’t just leave her to suffer alone and I-” 

“Woah,” his eyes widened in shock, “since when is parenting suffering? Your friend knew what she was getting into and you know it. She planned this pregnancy and she went on and on and on about all the baby books she read.” 

“I know that it’s hard to be a single-parent. It’s overwhelming and it’s awful, but you know what? I love you!” Your face scrunched up in confusion from his words. “And I don’t like seeing you being taken advantage of because you’re too kind.” 

“You keep chasing after your friend and you keep giving her an excuse to abandon her duties as a parent to go have fun. It’d be different if this was planned in advance and if you were being paid for it or something, but she keeps doing this!” 

“But-” 

He held up his hand to silence you. “This time she wants to go to a bar. The last time, she had a nail appointment. The time before that? She wanted to go to the bar again. When you’re a parent, you have to do what’s best for your child and sometimes that means sacrificing things for yourself.” 

You stayed silent hating that he was right. Ever since your friend gave birth, she had been leaning on you a lot. It made sense, in the beginning, and you didn’t mind, but it was starting to become a huge issue. 

It’s not that you didn’t like her child because you did. He was adorable and he listened well, but you didn’t want to have a kid and the responsibilities that came with it. At least, not at this time. 

“I don’t want to hurt her feelings,” you finally admitted. “I feel really shitty if I say no. I just…I don’t want to be an asshole.” 

“I know you don’t.” Han walked towards you, grabbed your hands, and tugged you off the couch. “But does it really make you an asshole if you’re putting yourself first? Sometimes you have to give people some tough love. Your friend can’t avoid her parenting responsibilities forever.” 

You let out a sigh and nodded your head. “I’ll go talk to her. I’ll come back and-” You paused before your eyes met his own sparkling eyes. “Is it alright if I meet you at the restaurant?” 

“Really?” 

You nodded again. 

He screeched in delight and jerked you over his shoulder. You shrieked as he spun around and bounced a few times. Your shrieks turned into laughter as he cheered. 

Once he finished, he put you back down. “I’m so proud of you for creating boundaries.” He reached over and planted a gentle kiss on your lips. “I’ll text you the restaurant location and then we’re getting drinks to celebrate. Now,” he shoved you towards the door, “get out and go talk to your friend.” 

“I believe in you and you can do this! No matter what happens, even if it backfires, you’ve got this! Honeybun, you can do anything and handle any problem that comes your way. Wait!” He rushed towards you and placed a kiss on your cheek. “For good luck!” He beamed. 

You laughed and thanked him as you left the apartment. Once you were outside, you sucked in a deep breath. This was terrifying and anxiety-inducing. You were sure your friend would be upset at your decision, but Han was right, you couldn’t keep bowing down to your friend and watching her kid all the time. 

It wasn’t making you happy. It wasn’t fair to the baby because you weren’t their parent. It wasn’t fair that your friend was able to keep avoiding responsibilities either. As you approached your car, you reminded yourself silently that Han believed in you. In turn, it made you believe in yourself too. 

_ _ _

Felix:

It was all going wrong. Everything was going wrong. Felix’s birthday was today and you were screwing up massively. You had everything planned out perfectly and then your mother ruined it. 

Usually, you put aside extra money to splurge on things. You weren’t the best when it came to money. In fact, you struggled with it. Every time you had money, all you wanted to do was spend it. It was a bad habit that you had just yet to break. 

Lately, you had bought a few gifts for Felix. You picked out a few new games for his Nintendo Switch that you’d thought he’d like. Plus, you found a few new articles of clothes that were his style. You even managed to purchase a bottle of the fancy cologne he liked to wear because you realized he was getting low on it. 

You splurged on the wrapping paper and the gift bags. Gift wrapping wasn’t your forte, but you were determined to impress Felix. This was the first year the two of you were dating and you were excited to throw him his own small party between the two of you. You spent nearly three hours on YouTube studying the perfect way to wrap gifts. 

When you found the video you liked the most, you took another two hours following along and neatly following the tutorials. You kept the gifts hidden beneath your bed and away from Felix for a few days, so he had no idea. 

You went out of your way to design a special cake. There was a bakery in the area that had raving reviews. They made custom cakes and you already had an idea of a cake you wanted to create. Since he spent so much time playing Animal Crossing and listening to Animal Crossing music, you wanted to get him to follow that theme. 

You were making a simple sketch of what you wanted. You planned to take it down to the bakery and have them create it. You had a price range and everything. Everything was perfect and then your phone rang. 

You were on your way towards the bakery, it wasn’t far away. When you picked up the phone, you realized it was your mom. You swiped the call and pressed the phone up to your ear. “Hello?” You answered. 

You paused and listened for a moment before your face fell. “Did you seriously? Mom!” You cried out. You couldn’t help the frustration that built up in your voice. 

“Don’t you ‘mom’ me!” Your mother shot back. “You’re old enough that you should be giving back to me. I helped raise you! I put food on your plate and a roof over your head! I fed you and I gave you an education.” 

You gritted your teeth and rolled your eyes at her response. After a while, you hung up the phone frustrated and upset. You returned back home and tried to fall back into your usual upbeat persona. You must have done a good job because Felix didn’t realize that something was wrong. 

The day before, you went to your mother’s house to help her make a meal. You put the small backpack you carried with your jacket. What you didn’t realize was that while you were out cooking, your mother got into your things and stole the cash you pulled out of the bank, specifically, for Felix’s cake. 

She constantly harassed you for money and sometimes you gave in. You couldn’t help it. Every time she pulled out the excuse of raising you, you felt guilty. It was like a kick to the back of the knees and you collapsed every time. 

You struggled to figure out what to do. You didn’t want to borrow money from anyone. You definitely weren’t going to make Felix buy his own cake. You didn’t want to wait until the end of the week before your next paycheck came in, so you decided on the next best thing. 

The next best thing, apparently, wasn’t the best idea. You thought you were making the recipe right for homemade cake, two days later. Everything was going alright until you tasted the batter. You instantly gagged and spit out the mixture. 

As you flipped back through the recipe, you realized that you had followed the recipe perfectly. However, you somehow managed to mix salt with sugar. The supposed sweetened batter was now a salty wreck. 

You cursed beneath your breath and dumped the mixture. You pulled out another bowl to remake and remeasure everything. While you were trying to recreate the recipe, Felix walked right into the kitchen. 

His sudden appearance caught you way off guard. You jumped while pouring flour and suddenly the bowl of half-made liquid cake was coated in way too much flour. A lump sat in the back of your throat as your face fell. 

“Oh,” Felix frowned, “I’m so sorry, baby. I thought you heard me come through the door. What are you making? I’ll help you remake it.” He sent you a reassuring smile, reached over, set a hand on top of your head, and playfully messed up your hair. 

All you could think about was how much he would have loved the Animal Crossing cake. The cake would have been moist and light. The frosting wouldn’t be too sweet and it wouldn’t overwhelm him. 

A strangled squabble came from your throat. Felix blinked in confusion and raised an eyebrow. “Baby, are you alright?” 

“I was supposed to get you a cake!” You blurted out. “I had this plan to get you an amazing cake with Tom Nook on it. I was going to recreate your little house and your character. It was going to be so cute and t-then-” you sucked in a shaky breath feeling like you were going to cry. “My mom took my money when I was at her house. I-I’m so sorry.” 

“It was going to be a cute cake. It was going to be custom made and it was supposed to be here, but I couldn’t even pay to have the bakers make it. I wanted to put it here and surprise you. I was going to make you a homemade one to try and make up for it, but I keep fucking it up.” 

A soft smile filled Felix’s face. “You were going to get an Animal Crossing cake for me?” 

“You love that game a lot.” 

“And I also love you a lot. It was an incredibly sweet idea, but don’t beat yourself up over it. I’ll be more than happy to have anything you bake me. I know you’d bake a homemade cake with plenty of love. That’s something that Tom Nook doesn’t know anything about.” 

You suddenly broke into a laugh as tears filled your eyes. “I’m sorry,” you finally finished. “I’m just really not having a great day. I should be having the best day ever. You popped out of your mom’s womb on this day and that was the greatest gift of all.” 

“Woah, okay, how about we stop right there?” He laughed. “We really don’t need to talk about my mother’s womb.” 

“I should call her and thank her.” 

“I don’t know how she’d respond to that. So anyway, what about your mom stealing your money? Is she going to give it back?” 

And so, you and Felix worked side-by-side making a third cake batter and placing it in the oven. He listened to you ramble about your mom while the two of you tossed ingredients into a bowl. You explained how guilty she made you feel and how you’d occasionally give her money because of that guilt. 

“Sweetheart, I don’t think that’s healthy. You don’t owe your parents anything. As a parent, it’s their responsibility to provide for you. They shouldn’t be making you feel guilty for that.” 

“I can’t help it, it’s the people pleasing part of me.” 

“I understand because I’m like that too sometimes. You’ve just gotta do what’s best for you. Your mom can be a little…um….” 

“Crazy?” You finished for him. 

“Well, I was looking for a nicer word, but yes. She can be a little much sometimes. You seem to be a lot happier when you don’t interact with her. I think you should focus on what makes you happy.” 

The two of you continued to talk. When the cake was baked, Felix leaned over to pull it from the oven, and you rushed to your room to grab the presents you had. He placed the cake on the stove to let it cool. When he turned back around, he blinked in shock. 

A few wrapped presents and a gift bag sat upon the counter that the two of you had just cleaned up a few moments prior. When his curious eyes met yours, you smiled at him. “Just because I couldn’t get the cake, it doesn’t mean I couldn’t spoil you with gifts. Happy birthday, baby.”

_ _ _

Seungmin:

Seungmin’s heart stopped beating when he heard you sobbing. He just came home from the studio. There wasn’t time to take off his shoes. His brain instantly went to the worst thing and he sprinted towards the sound. 

He didn’t knock, he just shoved the bedroom door open with wide eyes. You were a wreck with your face in the pillow. He rushed towards you in a panic. “Hey, hey, hey, why are you crying?” He hurried over and plopped down beside you. 

His hand instantly went towards your back to comfort you. Upon hearing his voice, you cried into your pillow harder. There was something embarrassing about being vulnerable in front of your significant other. 

“Baby, please talk to me. I don’t know what’s wrong if you don’t tell me. Did something happen?” He gently scooped his hands beneath your stomach and shifted you into a sitting position. 

A thousand what-ifs were locked into his head. You sucked in a shaky deep breath and let out another sob. He frowned and wiped your tears away. You hiccuped through the final few sobs. 

“I-I’m sorry,” you stuttered in a shrill voice. “I-I just-” 

“It’s alright, you don’t have to apologize. Just tell me what’s wrong. I hate seeing you like this.” He frowned and wiped away your tears. 

“M-My friend,” you managed to get out. 

“Your friend? What happened? Did they get injured?” Fear struck his heart. “Did they die?” 

You shook your head again frantically and your hair shook from side to side. “T-They just keep saying things a-and-” You burst into another sob. 

His eyebrows scrunched in confusion. His arms wrapped around you while you sobbed. While he held you close to him, there was a vibration from beside you as your phone received another notification. Your fingers clenched around his arm and you cried harder. 

Seungmin tried to console you, but you were a mess. He pressed his lips against the top of your scalp and continued to fight off your tears. He shushed you and rubbed your back. When your phone vibrated again, he finally glanced down at your phone. 

Your head was buried in his chest. You were a wreck from what your friend was telling you. More quick vibrations filled your phone with every text sent your way. Seungmin’s eyes didn’t leave the screen as more and more text notifications filled the screen. 

“Baby, who’s texting you?” 

You didn’t respond. Your fingers clutched onto his shirt tighter. You buried your head in his chest more as if it’d help you escape your inner turmoil. The tighter you clung to him, the more worried he became. 

He’d never seen you to the point of being unconsolable. Sure, you had your rough days before, but not like this. When your phone vibrated again, he didn’t ask. He reached over, unlocked your phone, and he glanced at the text messages. 

He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but he definitely wasn’t expecting to find one of your close friends screaming every obscenity at you imaginable in capitalized letters. His jaw instantly clenched and his hand tightened around your phone screen. 

“Baby, why the fuck are you being cursed out?” 

“B-Because,” you hiccuped, “I said I didn’t want to hang out with them.” 

“So why are they cursing at you?”

“They’re always like this when they don’t get their way. I’m h-having-” you hiccuped again, “a bad day and t-this just-” 

“Was your tipping point?” 

You sniffled and nodded. Seungmin frowned and scrolled through a few previous text messages. “They’re really always like this?” 

“They’re kind of mean when they have a bad day.” 

“Kind of?” Bewilderment stretched his eyebrows up. “Kind of?” 

He read a little more and gasped. “I know this dumbfuck didn’t just call my significant other ugly. Now we have our own little beef. Ugly? Have they considered looking in the mirror? The love of my life is no such thing.” 

He didn’t even ask, he just responded. When he was quiet for a while, you pulled your head out of his chest with wet cheeks. “What are yo-” 

“Putting this cunt in their place.” 

“Seungmin!” You cried shocked at the insult. 

“Don’t ‘Seungmin’ me. They just said you looked like you were inbred and they have a big storm coming their way. I won’t let an ugly cunt insult the love of my life. Not when they look like they were shaken in the womb and came out disfigured in more ways than one.” 

“You cannot be mean back!” You reached out and attempted to grab your phone. He jerked it out of your reach. “Seungmin!” 

“I’m just getting to the good part, baby. Wait until I tell them that a New York City rat has more manners and class than them.” 

“Seungmin!” 

“Swing low and I go lower,” he shrugged innocently, “maybe they shouldn’t have been so mean. They can start it, but I’m ending it.” 

You sighed, but you let him go. He seemed to be really focused on your phone. His eyes were narrowed and his thumbs moved frantically over the screen. He typed for quite a while before he hit the send button. 

“Do I even want to know what you said?” 

“Nope. Don’t worry,” he pressed a few more buttons, “because now you never have to deal with them again.” 

“What did you do?” 

“Blocked them after giving them a long insult that will be sure to affect their family for multiple generations after them.” 

“You didn’t have to do that.” 

“I’m not going to sit by and let an asshole insult my favorite person.” 

You softened instantly and glanced up at him with heart eyes. “I’m your favorite person.” 

“Maybe. It might have just slipped out. Anyway,” he stood up and grabbed your arm. You followed along and let him lead you into the bathroom. He pushed you in front of him and stood with his hands on your shoulders. You stood staring at your reflections in the bathroom mirror. 

“What are we doing?” 

“You’re going to repeat after me.” 

“But I-” 

“Nope, you’re not getting out of this. We’re going to stand here for five minutes and recite positive affirmations to dust off that negativity. After that, who knows, I might put a curse on that motherfucker.” 

“Seungmin!” 

“I’ll let Changbin beat them up and allow Lee Know to shove them in the air-fryer. Just wait until Felix finds out what they did to my precious gem. The sunshine is going to turn into a tornado and rip them apart. Now repeat after me, I am beautiful.” 

You hesitated at first, but after a while, you were repeating the affirmations through laughter and smiles as Seungmin tickled you. Maybe he shouldn’t have gone off on your friend, but you were precious to him and he hated to see you cry. He’d do anything to cheer you up. 

_ _ _

Jeongin:

Another day meant another chance to thrive. In your case, it was another day to sleep whenever you could fit it. Today, it was in your car. You barely got into the driveway and got the car turned off. You instantly slumped forward and pressed your head against the cool steering wheel. You fell asleep rather quickly and were like that for a while. 

Jeongin was used to coming home and finding your car in the parking lot. You got home an hour before him on most days. It wasn’t much of a surprise when he saw your familiar car in the parking lot. He parked his car behind you and shut it off. 

After climbing out, he yawned and lifted his arms above his head in a stretch. There were a few quick pops from his spine and he hissed. Today, the band had dance practice. His body was sore in more than one area. 

He shook out his limbs and began to head towards the apartment until he saw something out of the corner of his eye. With a frown, he glanced over towards your car. It took him a moment before he made your slumped figure out in the driver’s seat. 

His eyes filled with horror and he rushed towards your side of the car. He gripped the side of the car and tugged on the handle. Unfortunately, it was locked. Panic engulfed him and he knocked on your window frantically. 

You groaned at the noise interrupting your sleep. You shifted, but you didn’t lift up your head. Upon seeing this, he knocked at your window harder and tried to tug the handle again. 

Realizing someone was attempting to get into your car, you finally glanced up to find your boyfriend at your window. His eyes were full of concern as he gestured for you to unlock the car. 

You reached over, hit the unlock button, and you yawned. Jeongin flung the door open and hurried to your side. “Are you okay? Baby, please look at me.” 

When your sleepy eyes met his, his worry increased. He gently grabbed your chin and turned your head to the side. His eyes scanned for a head injury. “Are you alright, sweetheart? Did you hit your head? Did you pass out or something? Have you eaten anything?” 

“Hmm?” 

“You were unconscious in the car.” 

“Oh, yeah,” you shrugged, “I fell asleep.” 

He let out a sigh of relief, stroked your chin a few times, and finally let go. “You scared the fuck out of me. I thought something had happened and I was going to have to call an ambulance. If you wouldn’t have unlocked the car, I probably would have broken the window.” 

“I’m alright, I swear. I’m just tired, that’s all.” You rubbed your eyes with another yawn. “I’ve gotta head inside and get some sleep. My boss is probably going to want me to come into the office again early and stay late.” 

“Baby, with all due respect, you’re like a walking zombie. I know you like pleasing your boss and the money is good, but this isn’t healthy for you.” 

You let out a groan, but Jeongin stood his ground. “I know you don’t like hearing it, but you know I’m right. You need to focus on what’s best for you. Sometimes that means making sacrifices that might make other people unhappy, occasionally.” 

He reached over and tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. “Let’s get you inside and taken care of. Have you eaten anything today?” 

“I haven’t had time, honestly.” 

He frowned again, but he didn’t lecture you. “Let’s start there and then we can go on. Let’s get you a quick bite to eat and then get you to bed, alright?” 

You nodded in agreement. He held out his hand and you intertwined your fingers with his. You let him slowly tug you towards the house. Still half-asleep, you didn’t mind the babying he was doing for you. He plopped you down in a kitchen chair. 

You rested your head in your hand and nearly fell back asleep. He quickly made the two of you instant ramen cups to share. You were teetering on the edge of conscious and unconsciousness. He gently shook you awake, so you can eat. 

The two of you managed to have a decent conversation despite your yawns and tired voice. You managed to get halfway through the ramen before you nearly knocked it over as your body twitched while falling asleep. 

He chuckled and moved your ramen away from you. “Alright, come on, let’s go.” He stood up, grabbed your hands, and gently tugged you up. “Let’s go get you all tucked in, sleepyhead.” 

You hummed in agreement and let him lead you to the bed. He helped you out of your work clothes and into a pair of pajamas. When he was finished, he led you towards the bed and he tucked you beneath the covers. 

Bending over you, he planted a soft kiss on your forehead. “I love you so much.” 

“I love you too,” you sleepily mumbled with your eyes shut. 

“Promise you’ll start to work less overtime? I don’t want you to fall asleep on the road and get into a car accident. I want you to be safe and healthy.” 

You weakly nodded your head in agreement. He planted another kiss on your head before he laid down beside you. Happily, you snuggled into his warmth. His arms wrapped around you and he rested his head on top of yours. 

You fell asleep rather quickly, but it took a little longer for him to follow. He was nearly asleep until your phone chirped with a new notification. Groggily, he reached over and grabbed your phone off the side table. 

He stared at the text message from your boss and then he glanced over at you. You were sleeping rather peacefully and he didn’t want to wake you up. Taking his time, he slowly removed himself from your bed and crept with your phone out into the kitchen. 

Far away from you, he called your boss and explained that you had been overworking yourself. When your boss heard about how little sleep you were getting, they were instantly struck with guilt. Jeongin got permission for you to take off the next two days. 

You now had Thursday and Friday off, so you could catch up on sleep and recover. After that, you were free during the weekend. On Monday morning, he made sure you were able to go in at normal time. 

Maybe, you’d be able to work overtime as long as you didn’t overwhelm yourself with it. Jeongin couldn’t help it, he was worried about you. If you were upset and thought he’d overstepped his boundaries, that was a conversation the two of you could have the next day. 

For now, he placed your phone back on the side table. Climbing back into the bed, he wrapped his arms around you. He tugged your sleeping form close and let out a sigh of relief. With a calm mind and a fluttering heart, he’d finally join you in the land of dreams. 

| ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ | ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡ | ♡.﹀﹀﹀﹀.♡|

Masterlist

Taglist and inbox rules

[aria-ashryver]

SICSIG vs ID2 - Part 2!

bc there are even more similarities that it warranted a second post! (You can find Pt1 here)

some of these had me floored lmao. Spoilers ahead for Immortal Desires 2, up to and including CH14!

Vampiric Gifts exist

Cas has magic / a vampiric gift of his own

It was witches who first created the Talismans

Cas is scarred from being tied/chained up with silver

Cas swearing a blue streak when he's stressed lol

Gabe being forced to acknowledge his double-standard where Luca's vampirism and his own vampirism are concerned

Terri O'Rinn showing some steel when it comes to her child's safety

And she evidently has a mean right hook

Terri also being the one to make Cas cry when he experiences maternal love and care for the first time in his life

One of the trio punching through an enemy's chest cavity?! (Cas approves 😎)

This is basically an approximation of how Cas crying makes me feel T-T

CW: gore

MAJOR recurring themes/motifs of what makes a monster (this is a huge one in Starlight, and a super important part of Gabriel's arc 🥹)

(trust me, this is a culled-down version of the 56 mentions of "monster" i could have included lmao)

CW: suicidal ideation

Cas and Gabriel ✨holding hands✨ and thereby fundamentally altering the dynamics of their relationship forevermore (i can't believe they are basically married already, wow)

The Cas vs Gabriel Extremely Emotional Breakdown Smackdown!!

And then this last, silly, unimportant little detail of... oh, I don't know, GABRIEL HAVING A SECRET VAMPIRE HUNTER COUSIN???!?!?!

Like why cousin, specifically???? 👀 Lennox (after showing up out of fucking nowhere with zero groundwork or foreshadowing) goes on to elaborate that he's a distant cousin, several times removed --their great grandfathers were brothers-- but in Starlight, Joaquin Adalhard is a first cousin. Gabriel lived with the guy. They recognise each other on sight.

This one, out of all of them, is the wildest one for me lmao. WHY COUSIN??? WHY A SECRET ADALHARD VAMPIRE HUNTER COUSIN??? They could have gone "You're not the only one descended from Captain Adalhard" or "we are relatives, you and I" or "we share blood", but no, they went with cousin(ok, granted, that's literally the easiest family connection to make, bc there's lots of versions of "cousin" when you add the "once-removed", "twice-removed" etc, but still. I am CACKLING???)

Anyway, this was incredibly fun to make: if you are still reading and have no idea what longfic I am actually taking about, you can find snow in crimson, starlight in gold over (<-Explicit link) on ao3! I hope to see some of you there! 🥰

(obligatory poly!Gas summoning circle: 🕯⚫)

[voidwhump]

yea what i was talking about to whither-wander-whump was Dragonlance, like you guessed. Dragonlance Legends specifically (so, in case you're not sure which one that was, the premise is basically that the mage Raistlin wants to become a god, his twin brother Caramon needs to do a bunch of character development and stop being emotionally dependent on Raistlin, and the cleric Crysania wants to redeem Raistlin and Raistlin uses that to manipulate her to help himself). I've just been having brainrot abt it, like Dragonlance isn't even really a main fandom for me - honestly I haven't even really looked into what sort of a fandom exists for it, i've just been. you know. having brainrot abt it and suffering silently on my own, lmao. (I haven't even read that much of the franchise, and I'm further hindered by the fact that my local library mostly only has translated copies which I refuse to touch because the one time I read one of the books translated, the translation quality was awful. So anyway for now all I've read is Chronicles, Legends, and the first book of Destinies.)

Anyway for some reason my brain has decided it's fun to poke at Caramon a little bit (literally this wasn't a choice my brain just went okay we're rotating him now, without asking my opinion, you know how it is sometimes) and i've been toying with some "okay no way in hell he's actually just fine at the end of the story, he's gotta be traumatized as fuck after all that, what if I make him break down a lil bit over everything and then throw in some comfort" kinda thing. Y'know, a good old-fashioned aftermath angst / hurt/comfort fic. And I just feel like a few extra scars and an injury that didn't really heal properly or some lil things like that could be fun to add into the mix. anyway yea idk i'll probably never actually write it anyway cuz my brain is stupid

(also i ended up even reading the books in literally the stupidest weirdest most roundabout "how the fuck did you even manage that" way, it's ridiculous, but that's beside the point)

Cool! Like I said, dragonlance has never been my main focus, but I definitely read at least the first book of chronicles and I remember Raistlin but not his twin for some reason. It might be because I read it somewhere between 8 and 11 years ago lmao.

If you do actually get words on paper, the two routes I primarily see in fanfic in D&D universes to keep cannon injuries around are 1. removing magical healing that happened in cannon or 2. making a unique injury harder to heal/fully recover from than was established in cannon. For injuries invented for the fanfic writers just exclude clerics and include limited healing potions it seems.

I just now thought of a secret third option that could be a vibe: phantom pain from an injury that was healed but for whatever reason that character's brain didn't catch on. Maintains cannon injury -> magical healing status but fits nicely with emotional stress.

Anyway fucking mood on not being able to find copies of these older series, I've been trying to hook myself up with legend of drizzt ebooks for a while but Hoopla straight up removed the prequel trilogy at some point and libby's options from my branch are sporadic at best and always checked out. If I'm buying books I want physical copies and I do NOT have the space for that lol. Or the funds really.

[russilton]

"but some people can’t stand it." tbh fans have always been weird about Lewis and his ships with his teammates. Nobody shipped Valewis when Valteri is probably Lewis' closest friend on the grid. It all goes back to Nico and the fall of Brocedes tbh, so much of Lewis' career is tied to him and that particular rivalry. Lewis is also super closed off (again thank you Nico), George and Mick are probably the two people he actually interacts with in some capacity. It's difficult to ship him with anyone tbh, I quite like Britcedes btw but I can see why people may not feel too comfortable.

People being weird is the tagline to fandom, you could present them with a perfect ship and someone would still hate it. In a way I appreciate the freedom it gives me to do whatever the fuck I want.

I don’t ship valewis either bc again, Monoshipper, but if you want valewis, anon, I should recommend @milflewis - I love platonic and especially bromantic valewis with my entire soul, but if you want romantic, Niamh is the way to go. You can also see @princemick for mick and Lewis. It’s not my ship, but Kyle would drown just trying to swim to that boat

I think with Lewis ships it comes down to a perfect storm of Lewis being genuinely quite reserved and protective of his interactive circles bc he’s got trust issues you can see from space, the fallout of brocedes, and people just not liking George and Val. Sewis is without a doubt popular for a reason, I love Seb as Lewis’ friend, but seb is also undeniably more popular than George or Val will probably ever be, and that’s why sewis is much bigger.

And that’s someone Lewis really likes, If you need proof of how some people prefer character over interaction, look at Ch*wis. If Lewis so much as stands near Charles half my dash gets filtered for the next few days. Val and George don’t get that hype, Val only gets slightly more favourable treatment now he’s not Lewis’ teammate anymore, and I’ve literally seen folks get mad at George for breathing (on radio). That’s the nature of fandom, people like what they like and gravitate toward it.

For me, I mean Lewis has naked framed photos of vals ass and secret pics of George’s tits, he takes ice baths with George and travels to tracks with Val, he posts about them both fairly often, but that tends to get swept under the “well they’re teammates” umbrella. Some people find that less interesting, I’m personally frothing at the mouth and shredding paper because of it, but that’s me.

The scars of brocedes run deep. I hate it with a passion, it’s one of the few ships I genuinely cannot stand. For some people I’d assume that means shipping Lewis with a teammate again is out of the question, but to me I think that actually adds to the allure of them.

Val taught Lewis he could trust a teammate again, that he could be friends with them again, that it was safe to be vulnerable and it wouldn’t be used against him. George compounds that by showing Lewis that even if he’s competing with his teammate, they can still love each other. They can still work together, they can still share a family, they can still grow together. George is louder than Val, different, he’s got a spark Lewis sees in himself and it also scares him because he remembers what he went through. But George has been with them since 2016, as long as cal, he hangs on Lewis’ every word even now and smiles like sunshine when Lewis glances at him, and Lewis has grown too, he’s not who he was in 2016, and he’s not Nico.

I love writing about Lewis and Val and George BECAUSE they are the tree that grew from rotten fruit, as a concept the three of them are about growth and change and recovery from trauma. They’re about understanding what George and Val go through as the teammates of the greatest of all time, but also them having to understand the unique fire Lewis was forged in and the pressures he is under. They are my addiction and I love teammate stories bc it’s the classic trope of together against it all, and of found family within Mercedes

[skzfelixity]

Save Me | Cha Hyunsoo [Sweet Home]

Hyunsoo x Reader

Summary: Hyunsoo is about to end it all but the thought of you stops him.

Warnings: suicide attempt, mentions of violence, self harm and depression

Hyunsoo found himself entering the first building he saw, he was tired. He was sick and tired of life. Every time he went to sleep, he wished he never woke up. He wanted to end his miserable life. He was good for nothing and always disappointed everyone around him. He just wanted to be a better person but he ended up hating himself.

He stood at the edge of the building’s rooftop, staring at the ground. If he jumped he wouldn’t be able to survive. That’s what he wanted, right? That’s what everyone wanted, right? Not you, you didn’t want him to die and he knew it. He shook the thought of you. He wouldn’t be able to do it if you stayed on his mind longer.

Instead, he reminded himself of all the times he got beaten up for literally nothing, all the times his sister was embarassed to be related to him and the fact that his parents knew what he was going through but never helped him. All these made scars in his heart, him making them visible on his arm. Every time he made another mistake or felt horrible, he would add another one. Tears flowed down his cheeks at the memories.

Why did everyone hate him? It didn’t make sense to him, maybe he was that bad of a person. But then again, you always reminded him that you were thankful he was still here and how proud you were of him. He didn’t understand why, he did nothing to make you proud of him.

He started sobbing while taking a few steps back, why are you so happy every time you hang out together? Why did you show him your brightest smiles? You couldn’t be faking it, it was too much work to do. No one cared for him so why did you? What did you see in him?

He sat on the ground, knees close to his chest. He didn’t stop crying, his sobs got louder as random happy memories of you two flashed through his mind. Like that day when you started playing games with him just because it was the only thing he was intrested in. You bringing him food once in a while, scolding him for not eating for days. The way you held him in your arms whenever he was down, sad or troubled.

He liked what he felt during these moments, they made him want to keep on living. He pulled out his phone, a few tears dropping on the black screen. Did he really deserve someone like you? You were the best thing that happened to him, you were too kind to someone like him. 

He dialed your number, placing the speaker on his ear with shaking hands. He didn’t know what came over him but he needed to hear your voice. “Hi Hyunsoo, what-”

“Save me.”

You froze for a few seconds, he sounded too calm to be in danger. “What’s the matter, Hyun?”

He bit his bottom lip to prevent more tears from falling. He didn’t like being vulnerable in front of you, “C-can you meet me?”

“Yes of couse, just tell me where you are and I’ll come find you,” immediately on your feet, you ran to the location he told you. On the roof? You got so scared, did he try to jump? You couldn’t lose him, you didn’t want to.

Your ankles hurt from running but you didn’t stop, you needed to see him as soon as possible and make sure he was okay, physically at least. You opened the door to the rooftop, not seeing him anywhere. He couldn’t have left, he called you here after all.

He waited for you to notice him on the other corner of the roof, too afraid and ashamed to call you over. When you did, your heat felt at ease again. Hyunsoo’s heart feeling the same as you run to him. You gave him a bone crushing hug, he knew he must have scared you. He wished he hadn’t, all he could do to make you feel better was hug you back.

You didn’t know how to start. Ask him how he felt? Ask him if he was about to jump? Nothing felt right to say.

“I’m sorry, I must have scared you. Are you okay?” He was the first one to speak. He was so selfless it hurt your soul. He always cared for everyone around him but never got acknowledged nor praised for it.

“Stop asking about me! You’re the one who is hurting right now, why can’t you just say it?!” You pulled away from the hug to look into his eyes, which held so much pain. He sighed, it wasn’t easy for him to talk about his feelings but he had to since he called you here.

“Why are you proud of me?” He looked down at his feet, “I haven’t done anything that can make you proud of me.”

His words hurt you. He didn’t value himself enough, not at all to be exact. You cupped his cheeks to make him look at you. “I am proud of you because you are here today. Holding on for another 24 hours is not easy and I am so thankful I get to talk to you every day.” He started tearing up again, he knew you meant what you said and it made him feel a lot better. “You don’t see it but you are actually a very good person. The world is just bad.”

You wanted to cry too, the world was so unfair to him and it hurt to witness it. Hyunsoo felt acknowlegded for once, he wanted to be a better person and you just told him you saw him as one. He could trust you and believe your words. If such a genuine person thought he was a good person then it must be true. Moments with you was what he lived for, “I love you, Y/N. I am sorry for scaring you.”

“I love you too, Hyunsoo. Thank you for making me happy,” you embarced him in a tight hug. He did make you happy, you didn’t lie to make him feel better. He was pretty fun to be around, esepcially when it came to playing video games and having deep talks.

“I make you happy?” he mumbled into your neck, putting his arms around you. Hearing it would make him believe it completely, his brain and anxiety would accept the fact that he made someone happy in this miserable world of his.

“You make me happy, Cha Hyunsoo.” You ran your fingers through his hair, massaging his scalp. He hugged you tighter, enjoying your fingers on his hair. Affection is needed from time to time and you never missed the chance to show it to him.

“Then I will continue to make you happy so stay by my side,” he whispered, too tired and relaxed to speak louder. You smiled at his words, “Forever and always.”

[cinnamonest]

I am loving all these "Bitter Albedo getting revenge and doing as he wants with the reader"— but also, equally as bitter Creator! Reader growing resentful towards Albedo and wanting to do to him what he's done to her, or even _worse_. Anything to take him out of her life, so she half bakes a plan to "finetune" later, first starting off by building up some trust to get on Albedo's good side, she "gives in", plays nice and gets to work on alchemy with him.

She follows this routine, playing the loving glorified "housepet". But all the while, she's been fine-tuning her escape plan. It would either put him in an equal disadvantage to him, or it might kill her. At this point, either outcome would be mercy. She tells him there's still things from the Art of Khemia she hadn't taught him.

Things she'd learned in her travels while experimenting, not long after they'd gone their separate ways.

It starts out with gathering ingredients for tamer recipes, and just like she'd promised

New techniques, new creations and new knowledge was gained.

She makes him believe that she's adapting to his existence, maybe even tolerating him, but he didn't expect for her to only grow more and more bitter as time went on. The only thing growing in her heart was the resentment she harbored for him, any sort of admiration or genuine adoration she held for her creation all but crushed. She wanted nothing of him ever again, he had gone too far, miscalculated even, in his theory that reluctant "love" would follow his treatment.

Over the course of a few weeks, she has him carefully wrapped around his finger, unknown to him that she would show him just how much mercy she showed him when she sent him his own separate way. He was suspicious at first, of course, but in his moment of weakness, in his need for the approval she had been "showering" him in, he pushes the thoughts aside when he sees that her claims seem to be "valid enough".

He follows her instructions, and each time he gains new information on old, or even lost, techniques. Raging from little things she'd kept to herself so that he wouldn't have to interact with him when they worked together, To combinations only a mad woman who's challenged nature would dare think up.

and one day, she's telling him that she thinks he's ready to try the last thing she had managed to research on her own. He mixes the ingredients according to her instructions, everything seems to be going fine until he adds the last thing— and it's immediately reacted in a messy blast.

Albedo finds himself blinded by the fallout, as well as finding a surprising lack of digits on where his hands should be. His ears are ringing, obviously, such a blast would deafen anyone.

It's the creator's way of getting her own vengeance for the position he's put her in, at least this way, maybe, _maybe_, she can have a chance to finally put her failed created behind her. After all, he was always her most _disappointing_ creation.

AHHHHHH anon that took me aback at the last bit I was not expecting that. Poor little thing, how could master be so cruel...?

After the obvious resulting chaos (and agony), he'd be quiet for a long time. He ties you to the bed with what's left of his hands, having to use his mouth to tie the knot, and... leaves. Usually he's good about leaving you food when he goes out for the day, but not this time. He doesn't say a word as he leaves, even if you call out to him.

And he's gone for several days. You're starving, but even when he comes back, he doesn't say a word at first. Doesn't acknowledge your presence, no matter how many times you call out to him. It goes on like that for hours until eventually, without prompting, after you've given up calling for him, he just simply states a few thoughts.

He was... too kind. He understands that now. You didn't deserve it. You didn't appreciate it properly. So now, you will earn your way back to the way things were.

For starters, he takes the legs off at the scar. No real reason other than to hurt you. To see your horror when you fully wake up, pain, having to adjust. He pulls the same shit where he makes you beg for anesthetic and painkiller, but it's infinitely more painful this time. He keeps you just a little bit awake for the whole thing, even if you beg enough to be given some anesthetic during the procedure.

And after that, he stops talking to you. For good.

He himself is learning to adjust, having been given a prosthetics for fingers (literally Fullmetal Alchemist lmao) that he can make do with. You can learn how to adjust, too. Having *no* legs is actually different than just having numb ones, and learning to live without them is harder than you thought it would be -- your center of gravity and sense of balance changes, you have to avoid certain positions or risk a sharp shooting pain, etc. But even when you stumble and fall, and call out for help... nothing happens. You have to fix it on your own, or, if stuck too far to move, wait until he comes by up to hours later and silently sets you upright. If you call out in what sounds like high distress, he might come running over to make sure you're not in immediate danger, but after looking you up and down and ascertaining you're just uncomfortable and/or stuck, he slowly turns back, deciding he'll help you when he feels like it later.

You don't eat together anymore. He feeds you in a bowl on the ground. The first time, you turn your nose up and fold your arms in disgust... even though you haven't eaten the entire time he was gone. You're just that stubborn. No matter. Eventually, you cave, maybe the second day, maybe the third or fourth. He doesn't say anything the whole time, just takes the food when you make it clear you won't eat it, and puts it out each night, until you give in.

You sleep on the floor. Chained by the neck to the bedpost. You understand the message without needing to be asked out loud. You hated him so much, didn't you? You'd much rather be on the cold, hard floor than in bed, since he's in it, wouldn't you? Since you hate him so much?

And still, he doesn't talk. Somehow, that hurts the most. He was never very talkative, but he'd comment every now and then, ask you for your thoughts on something, but he now acts like you're not even there. No matter how many times you call out to him, he acts like he doesn't hear it.

It goes on like that for a month or so until you finally break down. Latch onto his leg and sob and plead. You feel like you're going insane, you say. You just want him to acknowledge you exist again.

...But why should he, he asks? It's the first thing he's said to you since the leg removal. He won't turn his head or eyes to look at you. What does he get from talking to you? You were so mean. For the few months leading up to the incident, you were so, so, so mean. He tried to be nice and get you adjusted, and you fought him every step (well... not that you were taking many literal steps) of the way. Remember? You were mean from the moment you woke up then. And then, when you were finally nice -- when he trusted you -- you went and did what you did. What reason does he have to acknowledge you? You'll either be mean to him or plot against him again. And that's all he's willing to say.

A few more weeks. A few more breakdowns. You know the intention -- he wants to truly, completely break you in a way that he never could when he was showing you any kindness. And, you hate it, but it's working. You find yourself begging. Sobbing. Rocking back and forth and clinging to his legs. Utterly pathetic, pitiful, humiliating displays of neediness and weakness. It breaks you down until he finally deems you complete, and one day finally makes eye contact with you for the first time in months.

There's not much left of "you" per se, though. The nasty attitude you had back before is almost completely gone. You're finally happy when he talks to you -- something that, after so many months of going insane from silence, you consider a privilege. After so many breakdowns and humiliation, you don't have much pride left to get in the way of begging, no shame about anything you do. It's perfect.

Not that it doesn't come back, sometimes. Sometimes, when you're having good days, you get a bit too comfortable, you forget what a privilege it is to be like this together, and you almost get mean again. But it's fairly easy to shut down with a very specific look that shuts you up immediately.

Oh, and he finds a way to fix himself, in the end. Being an artificial creation, he has a different compositional makeup than a person, so there are... ways to adjust and repair the body he has. In fact, he might even find one that would work on even an organic human, a miracle regenerative formula.

Not that he'd give it to you. But he makes sure to tell you all about it, showing off just how perfectly it regenerated his hands... just to see the look on your face.

[azenkii]

Sokka/Suki/Zuko Brotp Headcanons

These three are a god-tier brotp and i'm here to prove it

100% that one friend group who does the stupidest, most impulsive shit but they’re also super nerdy at the same time?

Like they'll be left alone together and you can guarantee that by morning they'll have broken into several heavily guarded government buildings. But like,,they didn't even steal anything important? they just wanted to see if they could find bosco's birth records and figure out why he's a regular bear

The last time they got drunk together they woke up on the Beifongs' roof in librarian's robes with a fully labelled diagram of a nonbending submarine in front of them

Suki and zuko braid each other's hair and sokka got jealous that he couldn't join in so he grew out his hair until it was long enough to braid

Suki teaches zuko how to fight with kyoshi warrior fans and he's absolute shit at it

In return, he teaches her how to fight with dual broadswords and she is not shit at it, which zuko thinks is unfair

all three of them spar together, all the time

sokka’s the unofficial leader of the group

he’s almost always the one who suggests the dumb/smart ideas

suki and zuko are pretty much on the same wavelength as him when it comes to plans so whenever he suggests something it goes like

sokka: so you guys know the new ozai society? well i was thinking about the pipes under the city-

suki: that’s a great plan. dibs on scouting the eastern block, zuko can you-?

zuko, nodding: the night market? on it

no one else can ever eavesdrop on their conversations because they just don’t make sense

the story of their escape from the boiling rock becomes legendary and they make a game out of retelling it. every time someone asks about it they’ll add something new. eventually the story ends up involving a platypus bear named Mai II, Chit Sang’s identical twin, a rope made out of bedsheets and three separate riots

sokka and zuko thought for a solid year that suki didn’t really like drinking because she always ended up relatively sober whenever they went out. turns out she drinks more than both of them combined and she’s just really, really good at holding her liquor

the amount of decrees they’ve passed while drunk is honestly ridiculous. only half of these decrees were cancelled afterwards because the other half actually made sense

suki once genuinely threatened to throw hands with one of zuko’s ministers. her reasoning was ‘he kept making weird faces whenever sokka suggested anything’

sokka and suki once ganged up against zuko. they called it ‘nonbenders solidarity’

zuko retaliated by creating a super-secret best-buds-only handshake with toph and they did it in front of sokka and suki whenever they could. sokka and suki eventually went ‘okay OKAY we GET IT also can you please...teach us the handshake it looks really cool’ and zuko was like ‘hm. no i dont think i will’

he then proceeded to drive them insane by immediately teaching the handshake to everyone he knew. aang? knew it. katara? knew it. mai and ty lee? knew it. every single one of his ministers knew it. the kyoshi warriors knew it (and wouldn’t tell suki). hakoda knew it. iroh knew it. that random regular visitor to iroh’s tea shop knew it.

sokka and suki gave up on ever learning the handshake. exactly one (1) day later zuko and sokka were playing their own modified version of pai sho with suki watching them and then zuko just casually went ‘so now that you’ve given up do you want to learn the handshake’

sokka and suki went FERAL and suki flipped the board

sokka: HOW DID YOU KNOW WE GAVE UP

also sokka, exactly 0.02 seconds later: also yes please teach us the handshake sifu hotman

the handshake is the stupidest most needlessly-complicated thing in the world but they learn it anyway and they don’t stop using it for approximately a month

and oh did i not mention that they made their own version of pai sho? they call it die sho and it features 16 homemade tiles and a set of rules that only suki understands. one game can last anywhere from 2 minutes to 2 days

they once wrote a book together under the pseudonym Wang Kyo-Lee. The book was a 500-page rant about plant husbandry. it became a bestseller in the earth kingdom.

they also once did a role swap for a day. zuko dressed up as a kyoshi warrior/the fire lord’s elite guard (complete with makeup to hide his scar), sokka was acting fire lord, and suki was his water tribe ambassador. that was how they discovered that they worked together so much that their jobs were literally interchangeable

there are rumours that the three of them are involved in a poly relationship. when asked, none of them will give a definitive answer

sometimes they’ll just go on holiday to some random obscure place without telling anyone and come back four days later with a frog, three new swords, a crate of theatre props and a valuable compilation of historical accounts that’s been lost for over a century

the most memorable thing they ever brought back was druk, aka a literal dragon

out of the three of them, suki makes the best tea. however, she’s also the worst cook

sokka learnt how to knit and promptly made them matching scarves. the scarves were ugly af but suki and zuko wore them anyway

when zuko overworks himself sokka and suki will literally manhandle him away from his desk and into his chambers, all while lecturing him as he nods sleepily and dozes on his feet

when suki overworks herself sokka and zuko will bring her tea and wrap her in blankets until she eventually falls asleep

when sokka overworks himself suki and zuko will drag him out somewhere under the open air and just sit with him until he relaxes and falls asleep on one or both of them

they have a running joke where suki and zuko will, in the middle of a discussion, go ‘GODS you remind me of this one guy i met while i was travelling’ and then proceed to describe sokka until he realises they’re talking about him

they all have a very dark sarcastic sense of humour that can honestly be alarming to anyone who doesn’t know them. mai thinks it’s hilarious

suki knows how to juggle. she tries to teach sokka and zuko and they both fail miserably

sokka takes them ice-dodging. sokka (once again) earns the mark of the wise. suki earns the mark of the brave. zuko earns the mark of the trusted. 

(does zuko earning the mark of the trusted make him cry? perhaps)

hakoda takes one look at suki and zuko and immediately goes ‘oh ok youre my children now’

zuko can handle himself pretty well in the cold (breath of fire, remember?) but that doesn’t mean he likes it. sokka and suki constantly tease him about it whenever they visit the south pole

zuko once startled suki while she was sleeping and she accidentally chi blocked him. sokka laughed until he cried

they 100% have heated debates about super niche topics

anyway they’re all bffs who may or may not be dating each other send tweet

[frombeyondtheblackhole]

Hermit DSMP Swap AU: Part 4

... Skeppies- not in his house... he was in his mansion. Now he is in a mine. That’s not normal, or shouldn't be normal. Who knows what’s normal really. “I reject normal,” He muttered to himself before turning and yelling down the mineshaft “Baaaaaad... Very funny Bad!” He started back down the mine shaft, Bad had to be hiding around a corner up here somewhere. “How did you do it?... Bad?” No response “Bad! Stop hiding already, I know you’re there.” 

Wait, what was this. Skeppy stopped and squinted at the mineshaft walls. He’s a literal diamond, Skeppy knows a thing or two about rocks, and this was a rock he had never seen before. The whole wall was made up of large patches of this dark scaly stone. He knocked his knuckles against it, his diamond skin barely scratching it. “What the hell?” He said and was disappointed when Bad didn't interrupt with his typical ‘language.’ This gave him an idea. He cursed louder. Still silence. Skeppy frowned. Maybe Bad really wasn’t there. 

“Well, I'm leaving now. Last chance.” Still nothing. There was a sinking feeling in Skeppy’s chest. Bad wasn’t there. If this wasn’t a prank then what was this. Skeppy hurried down the mineshaft wasting no time in finding the ladder and climbing out into the sunlight. He exited the little house at the top only glancing back down the mine shaft once through the glass floor. He came out on the edge of a bay, mountains and trees behind him. There was some dirt scaffolding laid out in a massive square across the water, and a nether portal and some chests could be seen on a tiny island in the distance.  

He blinked at it for a minute and then Skeppy did what he always did when he didn’t know what to do. He started yelling.

“Hey yooo! Anyone, there!? Anyone out there?! Hellooooo, I’m talking to you!?” His voice echoed back to him and the water lapped softly against the beach. Skeppy scowled “Well, if you don’t want to be friendly then I’ll just leave. How about that? You hear me? I’m leaving, never returning. Not coming back.” He shouted for the benefit of any hypothetical hiding onlookers as he marched into the forest and started climbing the hill. 

The forest quickly thinned and the hill became more of a cliff, and soon he was climbing over rocky boulders and through flat patches of blue-green grass with the occasional grazing sheep. He came over the next hill and stopped short. The mountain dropped off in front of him and in the plain below looked to be some kind of a village. He squinted; a collective of houses built around what looked to be some kind of pole. 

He heard a bleating sound behind him and turned just as something white with horns rammed into him, knocking him off the cliff and sending him tumbling down the rocky slope, head over heels, till he slid to a stop at the bottom. He looked up at the blue sky and groaned. If he wasn’t a literal rock, he would have been covered in bruises. As it was he still felt like shit.    

“Well look at what the goat dropped in.” Someone laughed. Skeppy tilted his head back to look behind him, everything upside down. A man in a red sweater cast his shadow over him. 

He smiled and the corners of his eyes creased, his shadow growing as a pair of wings spread slightly behind him “Hey there, you seem new, welcome to Boatem town.” 

“Uuuuu... hey there?” 

“You just gonna to lie there, buddy?” He laughed again, reaching out a hand. 

Skeppy blinked and shook his head rolling over and taking the offered hand as the man helped him up. 

“By the way, I’m Grian, whatcha doing out here?” 

“Skeppy, and I, with my excellent sense of direction, was exploring and definitely not lost in any way. I know exactly where I am. And I’m definitely not the victim of some unnamed prankster” He said, starting to walk towards the village and looking around. They were behind a big mossy house.

“Oooh, a prank you say, I’ve got to hear this.” Grian said, following. They walked around the house into the village center, a tower of boats hovered in the middle over an ominous pit. 

“Naaah it’s boring really,” Skeppy waved his hand dismissively as he stopped near the edge of the Boatem hole and peered over. It went all the way down to bedrock, like L’manburg. “Huh... interesting...”

“Ah, yes. That is the Boatem hole, we're planning on opening it up to the void at some point.” Grian explained.

“The void? Wait, you can do that? That sounds awesome. Imagine the pranks you could pull with that” Skeppy said his curiosity getting the better of his caution.

“I know right, Scar’s already fallen down there several times,”

“Hey Grian, who’s your friend there?” A man with in a maroon coat and a tinny hat said coming over. When he came closer Skeppy noticed a long scar running diagonally across his nose and face. 

“Hey Scar! Speak of the devil,” Grian called out to the aptly named man. “This is Skeppy, he’s absolutely not lost.” Grian quipped, smiling, his voice full of sarcasm. 

“You’re lost you say,” Scar said his voice full of all the honey of a car salesman. Skeppy would know, he used the same honeyed tone when trying to talk Bad or Techno into something that probably wasn’t going to end all that well for them but would be absolutely hilarious to watch. 

“Not lost,” Skeppy quickly corrected. 

“Well even those who aren’t lost are trying to get somewhere. I’m sure you wouldn’t object to us sharing a shortcut or too.”

This man was good. Skeppy didn’t want to look too desperate though. Just add a bit of hesitation sprinkled with some skepticism, that should do it “Well... I suppose a shortcut sounds like a good idea. I am heading for the Badlands, know a faster way to get there?”

Skeppy was met with vacant looks, the car salesman gone. “Actually I have no idea where that is,” Scar shrugged sheepishly “How about you Grian,” 

Grian shook his head “Nope... now that I think about it, how did you get on the server anyway,”

“Um... I... I think, I think I just spawned... It’s hard to remember honestly, it’s been so long.” Skeppy frowned at the strange question. 

Grian and Scare glanced at each other in shock. New players weren't born, they were spawned, but it was very rare for players to spawn for the first time in a community server. Usually they spawned in a private server and then moved into a community when they found one that worked for them. 

“Oh!” Skeppies eyes went wide with realization then horror. If a diamond could blanch, Skeppy was the closest thing to that. “...This isn’t the Dream SMP, is it?” 

“Oh dear...” Grian Muttered, “That’s not good.”

---

TFC had been mining. Now he was standing in the middle of a quartz building. That wasn’t normal. His connection to the server had always been a bit glitchy. Maybe this was just another instance of server glitch. He had been frozen in place for days, lagged out, and even defended. Teleportation could just be added to that list. And it wasn’t all that bad, it’s not like it dumped him in the middle of the ocean or lava. As it was, it seemed like he was in someone's starter base. 

He walked down the stairs and out the glass front doors. There were pools of water to either side of a walkway and the yard was cluttered with large colorful statues. A muffin, a duck. Goodness the hermits were already at it with the pranks this season. 

He walked around the statues and came to the front gate of the grounds. A long wooden path lead off in one direction, and wrapped around behind the mansion in the other. A large red multi story building loomed in the distance. The hermits really had gotten busy. 

It was always nice to see what other people were making but he needed to get back to his mine. He took the path following it around the back of the mansion. The path dropped off suddenly. He jumped down and landed with a grunt before taking some bread out of his pocket and munching on it as he rounded the corner of the quartz building's foundation. 

He faltered as his eyes fell on a massive blackstone building looming out of the sea, two imposing lava infused towers book ending the walls at either side... And he had thought the Red build had been big for early game. This was definitely too big for early game... even by hermit standards. 

He slowly walked closer. Beyond the Quartz house was mostly just an open field until it reached the water. As he got closer he noticed his pickaxe suddenly become unnaturally heavy. It felt strangely like Mining Fatigue. What would a Guardian be doing out here? He returned his pick to his inventory. TFC had seen a lot of things in his time, and this thing felt off. 

“Pst..” 

TFC jumped and looked around for the source of the noise. 

“Over here,” 

Now he noticed the footprints in the ground and a floating potion bottle. That sounded like Etho. 

“Etho?” TFC queried.

“Yeah, it’s me. Here drink this, I can explain later,” Etho said, shoving the potion into TFC’s work calloused hands. 

TFC looked down at the bottle of bubbling silver liquid for a moment before uncorking it and downing the liquid. He trusted the young man with his life. 

--- 

Sam started up from his chair in the dark room where he had been flipping through the prison's security camera feeds, lit only by the glow of the computer screens. He expanded the outside front camera feed to full screen and rewound the feed. A strange old man he had never seen before slowly approached the beach by the prison then just disappeared. Who the hell was that and why did he take an invis potion. 

Sam scowled. “Not on my watch,” he muttered, summoning his trident from his inventory and marching for the exit.

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

Scattered AU Masterpost Part 2 [COMPLETE]

Due to post length limit (which is apparently a thing), this AU has been split into two parts. Find Part 1 here!

Join the Discord server here!

Contributions:

- Mumbo has a pet ravager miscellaneous ideas: the ravager is actually a bit small as far as ravagers go. Once Mumbo leaves to go to the hermits, he doesnt take the ravager with him, for fear the environment wouldn't be right for it. However, the ravager follows him and Iskall, startling both when it comes running up to Mumbo. The ravager does not like any of the hermits, however it doesn't attack them because it can understand that Mumbo cares about them. - anonymous

- related to scattered au and "what if this happened to old hermits too" -- python's stuck in a death loop in a bastion (his spawn is right next to a piglin brute). he has no clue what's going on but by god, does he blame zloy - Anonymous

- Consider: Etho's mask protecting him from the flowers that gave Hypno so much trouble. - @/rayveewrites

- (Scattered AU) After Etho dies accidentally at the spawn haven, his spawn takes him to Xisuma. Xisuma is clinging to life when he gets there, and Etho only has time to grab his admin's arms and promise he'll be found before Xisuma passes away. Etho and Xisuma get a few hours together to work on getting Xisuma to the surface before Etho starves to death, and he's transported somewhere else. After that Etho makes it his mission to cycle through spawns as quickly as possible to help Xisuma and anyone else who is trapped in their spawn graveyard, no matter how much his legs start to fail him from the damage starting to linger from building into the sky and leaping off to respawn over and over. - @/petrichormeraki

- Some honorable mentions from my written summary for mumbo in the au: the illigers being terrified as he keeps coming back no matter how many times they kill him; he gets adopted by evoker; he fails at evoker magic, like so bad he cant even dye a sheep; the evoker being so done with mumbo that they beg the vex to give him magic; mumbo summoning scar when the vex get annoyed at how often he summons them, mumbo eventually summoning bdubs after scar's contract to mumbo runs out.... and so much more - @/therainofsweetmelody

- Moobloom!Hypno attracts bees - @/itsabork

- Not too long into his messenger journey, etho remembers what had happened to impulse by the time he, zed and tango had found him, which inspires him to try and die in a different way each time he sets off to find another hermit, partly to avoid becoming resiliant to certain death methods and partly for the challenge - Anonymous

- Because Doc hasn't died his death messages haven't been showing up in the chat. The other hermits don't know if he's even in the same world as them. - Anonymous

- (Scattered AU) More on the Mumbo accidentally summoning Scar thing; the summoning has "opened" the chat for them, but only between Mumbo and Scar. All evokers can call on their Vex, after all, so why not an evoker in more-or-less training? - @/petrichormeraki

- (alternate headcanon) There's so much discussion in the server, I wouldn't know where to start restating. However, I wanna mention one thing: scar spawning in xisuma's first spawn, deep in a geode down under ground. Being trapped in an endless death loop due to the warden lurking just outside the geode, forcing scar into the same loop xisuma had been trapped in so long ago. Not only does he have to deal with the separation from bdubs once they got out of the end, now he seemingly cant escape the warden's clutches.... - @/therainofsweetmelody

- Admins log who knows how long: I've finally managed to get my helmet some repairs with this I could get some plugins to start working hopefully. Considering the situation going on, I better not have derped to hard on this, not now. - Anonymous (singleplayer sleep now works)

- (Scattered AU) Because the code is glitchy for mob hermita, Jevin would spilt when injured too much. So while X and Jevin are trying to get to the surface, they encounter a dungeon or a mineshaft and Jevin gets fatally injured. X starts freaking out cause he doesent want to be alone again and he cant bear to watch Jevin die infront of him and risk getting lost and seperated and Jevin just splits, theres two Jevins now and X doesent know what to think of it.While there are two Jevins, their consienceness is split between the two and his motor skills are more sloppy and X notices and realises that Jevin loses more of himself the more he splits. So while he has a lower chance of losing Jevin to an unfortunate accident, Jevin slowly reverts to a slime the more be splits and the more be spends time as multiple entities. X worries that if Jevin splits for too long or too much, he might lose Jevin - @/itsabork

- The only portal to get out of Hels and into the overworld is an incredibly complex vault boarder line weapon built by Hels Doc and Hels Mumbo and the location of the portal is known only to a few and it changes every season. Now cue Helsknight and Wels sneaking all around Hels while trying to look for this basically impossible to find and get into way home. - anonymous

- It takes a while, but eventually those outside of hermitcraft start wondering why all the hermits collectively disappeared. Sure, they started a new world, and sure they’re usually more secluded, but it’s been months. Skizz wonders why he hasn’t heard from Impulse in a while. All the legates wonder where Python went. Everyone’s confused when none of the hermits turn up to the next MCC. Things get weirder when none of them sign up for the one after. -🟣

- Ok to add on to the daisy ravenger post, on his way to 0,0 Mumbo found spawn spawn, slo when he arrived everyone had him at sword point, expecting angry illiger noises they were surprised when they herd "GUYS IT'S ME!!" - Anonymous

(Note: Hermits at the haven currently include Joe, Beef, Hypno, Scar, Bdubs, TFC, Mumbo, and Iskall, in order of arrival. XB is en route, and Etho was there briefly before dying and respawning elsewhere.)

- Pix and Zloy would be the first to notice the hermits' absence. After all, they do a weekly show about them. Maybe they just decided to have a few weeks of downtime before moving to the next Season? Though surely it wouldn't take this long... - @/rayveewrites

- because im a legacy sucker, the legates would likely be the first to notice the hermits' disappearance. between zloy being on the server, skizz being part of zits and very close to impulse, pearl knowing a few hermits, plus python literally disappearing. what they'd do about it? no idea.to keep it more on the topic of hermits though, don't think about how devastated skizz would be to find out what impulse went through. don't think about it :) - anonymous

- Hello I have produced thoughts! I don’t have room for both so I’m sending 2 asks -when Iskall arrives at the mansion all of the illagers are wary; if one of mumbo’s friends are here then he must be leaving soon. Despite their initial feelings they’ve come to care about this idiot that wandered into their house, and they’re fully aware he has no survival instincts whatsoever, so when he does end up leaving they send a ravager to keep him (and his friends, they suppose) safe -@/haworthiaace

- so like... hear me out ok what if the reason the whole world is corrupting and weird and why a lot of people are like slowly turning into mobs is because maybe this is the way the game and the mobs are turning on the hermits for like making really inhumane farms or something like that and the mobs somehow messed with the code of the world to get revenge - anonymous

- Scattered AU!! Biffa spawned very concerned and on a beach. Where is he? How did he get here? Is he alone? Well one of his questions was answered quickly as he heard a constant buzzing sound come from his communicator, upon opening it he saw probably millions of death messages. He quickly realised this was probably supposed to be a new season of hermitcraft, but he didn't really have time to think about it, night was quickly approaching and he could already see drowned swimming towards him. - Anonymous

- How many times did X die to that Warden? Maybe he develops something to counteract the Warden’s sensors, or that his heartbeat slowed down to the point that his suit can barely pick it up (therefor making it harder for the Warden to track Xisuma down). -🦊

- Etho tried his best to fight the system and not get any new features from all his deaths. But, the game has its ways. Slowly, after every death he has, the less alive he comes back. (Undead!Etho, could be ghost, zombie variant, or skeleton variant) -@/harley-the-pancake

- Other hybrid characteristics Hypno gets of the moonbloom: His ears turn into golden cows ones, the horns grow in, he gets a tail, and little flowers grow though his hair and wrap around his horns. He can also grow flowers around him as long as he has dirt, but thankfully they dont do anything beyond smelling a lot stronger and smelling very nice (and maybe a bit of evoking certain reactions, but nothing beyond what normal flowers can do, ie lavender being calming, just a bit more intense) - anonymous

- Beetlejhost ended up in the world along with the hermits, spawning as if summoned: in the middle of a circle of beehives. His spawn is in the birch forest near the s8 spawn, and his presence spooks anyone who stumbles across him. He blends in concerningly well with the black and white of the forest. Beef feels like hes being watched whenever he goes in the birch forest to get supplies, but joe never notices a thing. He teases the hybrids about their changes, leading him to get swiftly decked- - @/therainofsweetmelody

- beetlejhost spawns in a circle of beehives in the birch forest near spawn. he thinks he's invis, in reality it's just his stripes making him blend into the birch trees. he can't leave the circle of bees, ah how wonderful it is to bee bee-tlejhost - @/justme123abz

- Beetlejhost doesn't mean to be mean, really, he just has really, really bad timing. This includes seeing a pollen-stained Hypno and, with his gravelly voice, immediately say "Woah! Someone had some fun in the sun! Tell me, did you spend a week rolling in dandilions or do you just like the color yellow?" This does not go over well - Anonymous

- Speaking of hybrids, Xisuma spawned in a Wardens den right? Well unlike the other hybrids, Xisuma has been changing too but its been slow. Every time he spawned back in that place, on the warped ground, he's changed. He doenst notice the dark starts to seem less dark, until noises get louder, until he's more sentive to it then he noticed, he gets stronger and breaking though the stone with his bare hands seems a bit easier, its not until he finds Jevin and he points out the glowing horns (1)peaking from his temples when his hair is pulled back hastily that he realizes that something has gone horribly wrong with him. Thankfully Jevin helps ground him before he can freak out, so he shelves it for later, once they're out of this cave. The warden that once was down by his spawn is no longer there btw, disappeared. The horns grow slowly, and soon glowing vein like markings appear as well. (2) - Anonymous

- Okay, Xisuma, we established he spawned in the deep dark, right? As time goes on he adapts to the dark. The skulk sensors grow on him. However as time goes on, they not only grow on him, but become a part of him. His footsteps quiet to near silence, and he can feel sounds. He certainly isn't how he was when he entered, at first glance he might even be mistaken for a warden. - Anonymous

- Tango is the only hermit other than Mumbo Daisy kind of likes. Tango thinks Daisy is absolutely adorable, and Daisy does like the positive attention(and the treats). - Anonymous

- When tango meets mumbo’s pet ravager he loses his mind, he tried so hard to get the decked out ravagers to like him and then mumbo just waltzes in riding on one of the things! He ends up hanging around her a lot and eventually forms some sort of relationship, although not as close as he would like (he also gets a little more sympathetic once he sees the effects the evokers had on mumbo, he figures the guy earned a pet ravager) - @/haworthiaace

(Hermits now at the spawn haven, in order of arrival: Joe, Beef, Hypno, Scar, Bdubs, TFC, Mumbo, Iskall, Tango, Impulse, Zedaph. XB is en route, Wels and Hels are traveling through Hels to get there, Ren, Doc, and Grian are attempting to get there but their success has been limited so far)

- Scattered!AU: Idea that Ex is the ONLY one that knows what is going on and how to fix it perhaps (maybe 'cause of having been banished to the void for so long)? That's why he's trying to find X. - Anonymous

- Admins log: day 1006: Me and Jevin finally see sunlight, and I've managed to get the clock function on my helmet working, finally. As we're on our way to the surface, I only hope that I can find someone or something to help guide us to where we need to go, but unfortunately I've lost all signal to chat, and I think we're next to a woodland mansion. I think I've derped up this time.

- Dear Xisuma, if you see this message then the log is working, also fixed the clock in your helmet it's been 50 days, not 1005. I was about to leave with Iskall when I noticed you and Jevin outside with a few, erm, "buddies" of mine you two where passed out and I managed to stop them from killing you with Daisy, my pet ravenger. I'll explain everything later and spawns in the village are working, finally. I recommend not moving much and work on the data packs for a bit before you do anything elseExplanation log to Xisuma part 2: Sorry if the last one got cut off abruptly, apparently there's a limit to these messages. Any way please take care of yourself. Sincerely, your pal Mumbo Jumbo

- Admins log, day 51: I first want to say thank you Mumbo for bringing me up to speed and explaining why and how me and Jevin are here, next I want to say that these logs may slow down for a bit, I'll be working on some maintenance for some packs. I still don't know why this is happening, I now hope this is a wicked nightmare and not our reality. Hang on I see something over there it looks like, wait let me ju- Voice logs are off for the moment.

- all one anon

- mooblooms spread the flowers that enraptured hypno. now that hypno is a moobloom hybrid, he can make people "hypnotizd"! he doesnt like to, but if the spawn ever gets attacked, the hermits are winning easily. - anonymous

- I like to think that at some point when there's a significant number of healthy hermits at 0,0 they start group searches to find the rest of hermits - anonymous

- After awhile, if they can't change the spawn of everyone, they begin securing all the spawn points to everyone, so if their bed is ever destroyed in the future, they won't end up in a death loop again. They secure the death loop spawn points first. - @/ciaravixen

- For undead Etho: I know that ghasts aren't technically undead mobs, but they're basically ghosts and that's what I feel etho is becoming?He's leaving his mortality behind bit by bit as he ceases to care about death and starts to use it as a tool instead.One day he'll respawn without a body at all - @/draconic-dreams

- This is just a thought. Sand cant be good for Iskall's mechanical parts, and its not like he has anything to fix it. Does he have to wait to find doc to be able to have hope of fixing himself? - anonymous

- Jellie had spawned in the village that cub and xb had come across, so when xb heads to 0,0 he takes her with him (she'd be safer in the overworld than in the end, after all). Its quite a long journey, and she makes for good company. -@/supertiny-tins

- Grian, Doc, and Ren fianlly start heading out to 0,0. Its a long journey, they decide in the end to leave their beds behind at the cabin in case any of them die so none of them end back at their orginal spawns. they would of just made new beds every time but the lack of suplies and resources near by has been low oddly enough. Doc manages to push aside most of his fears to help Grian and Ren, who are weaker, but he keeps his distance whenever he can. They make many hastily built huts as they go 1most nights are spent sleeping on hard ground, later straight up blocks of wool they find but not beds, just wool is better then ground, and it doesn't do the weaker hermits any favors but it works. There are many close calls, but they manage to avoid death, mostly due to Doc. Along the way they start to find signs of other players, coble in places it shouldn't, a rare torch, half mined trees, but no hermits. They still have a way to go, but they're getting closer to the others and safety. 2 - anonymous

- Etho once found himself spawning in the middle of an ocean with nothing and no one in sight except of course... A faint trail of lights dancing beneath the waves... Pulsing and glimmering, almost in a rhythm, something so fascinating, so... So... He was meant to be doing something...? It was... Important... At least... It might have been... It's all.. Kinda hazy... It couldn't have been more important than the lights, nothing was more important than the lights... They were so beautiful... He could watch them all day... Etho never noticed how he slipped beneath the waves, nor how the glow squid's glittering eyes had turned upon him, coiling a tentacle around his waist as it dragged its prey deep into the depths, his eyes hazed with green, he never even noticed his lungs burning for air.And he never remembered drowning after he respawned. - anonymous

- Impulse actually punches through the Nether roof so they can traverse more safely to coordinates given to them by Etho. They leave trails of blocks so they can make their way back, of course. - @/rayveewrites

(Evil X is now hiding out in a cave near spawn)

- Shattered!AU: I see everyone's Warden!Xisuma heacannons and I give you Axolotl!Xisuma. Think about it he's been hanging around with them and Jevin in the lush caves so maybe he's becoming more like them. (Frills, a more pink-ish tint to his skin, the ability to breathe underwater, etc.) :D (Is this because the thought of him having Warden traits is terrifying to me? Maybe. Is it because I think he deserves to become something not scary after his whole ordeal in the Deep Dark? Yes.) - anonymous

- Ever since getting out of the loop, Impulse has had a horrible inner conflict between his guardian side being instinctually drawn to the water, and his human brain being deeply terrified of ever being submerged again. - @/asexualbert

- Because I absolutely adore Daisy, more headcannons for Daisy.Daisy will occasionally just pick Mumbo up gently with her horns when she thinks she isn't getting enough attention. Daisy has a bell collar, because she kept scaring hermits by following Mumbo silently. Daisy is more okay with Iskall than most other hermits, though still doesn't really like him. - anonymous

- Though I'm a sucker for angst, what if Impulse was saved by a dolphin pod or something instead of transforming into a hybrid (or after transforming if Guardian!Impulse is cannon). :3 I can picture dolphins don't take kindly to the Guardian Mobs, might even find them as prey if anything since they're fish. (Guardian!Impulse wouldn't count since they're smart enough creatures to tell the difference.) - anonymous

- Prob a bit early for epilogue stuff but I like to think that, once all the glitches are fixed, that those that became hybrids and would prefer to be back to normal get changed back. - anonymous

(Shade note: Personally, I'm a sucker for stories where the characters adjust and learn to live with the unexpected changes to themselves rather than having them magically fixed, but this option is certainly still here for the people who find it appealing)

- For the scattered au, after the numerous frozen deaths Grian's gone through he starts hearing voices from the snow, even from within Ren's cabin. A snow golem forms after a wandering trader drops a pumpkin and watches from outside the cabin, deciding to guard the place after taking a liking to Grian and Ren. - anonymous

- When Etho became fully ghost, it hit hard. BeetleJhost saw this, and after a while decided to teach him how to show his form and speak. It takes a lot out of him, but it’s worth it. His friends deserve that closure. (Listen, I was expecting angst, I just wasn’t expecting that much angst.) - @/harley-the-pancake

- Mod Shade, I want you to know that angsting ghost!Etho that hard was entirely on you. I was picturing him clipping through blocks and dropping items at inconvenient points, not fading out of existence entirely. - @/draconic-dreams

- Possible explanation for everything going on in Scattered:Players were never supposed to be so powerful; in the natural state of Minecraft they're just another mob, albiet one that can craft and use any tool.But the Players weren't satisfied with that. Everyone from the admin of the smallest server to the mythological ‘dev team’ has been imposing little changes on the world since its inception, slowly tweaking it into a better environment for Player-kind.A single spawn at the world's centre. The ability of Players to chat from one end of the world to another -- even across different worlds. Even natural regeneration, an ability unique to the rarest and most powerful of mobs. As time marched on, Players not only unlocked these things but began to take them for granted, drawing far away from the behaviour of normal mobs. This became normal. Players continued to create datapacks and run commands that tweaked the very nature of the world. -@/draconic-dreams

(Shade note: Perhaps it was just a random glitch, one fundamental line of code removed to shift the balance of power. Or maybe it was orchestrated, but by who and for what purpose? Either way, it will take the Hermits a while to realize this, and even longer to fix it...if they can at all.)

- Jessasin spawned in a mesa biome, of course he's confused on how he got there and why he's in this random vanilla world and not his usual modded world, but both questions got pushed aside when the death messeges arrive. He exploared the area gathering as much recourses as he can and goes off too find someone, anyone really. - @/ghan-does-things

- hello! I discovered the scattered au literally yesterday so sorry if this is something that has already been gone over but I had an idea about bdubs, what if his constant exposure to the void and surviving on nothing but chorus fruit for who knows how long made him slightly enderman-y? 1/2 (sorry, couldn't fit the whole thing in one ask)Like nothing obvious at first, but making eye contact makes him agitated and snappy, touching water makes his skin tingle and if you look at him in the dark his eyes seem to have a very faint pink/purple glow about them? Maybe the other hermits swear he's taller than he was the last time they saw him? And the tips of his fingers are blackened, he assumes due to frostbite, but it seems to gradually be making it's way further up his hands? again sorry if this has been gone over already 2/2 - @/plantichu

- Okay so after Welsknight and Helsknight manage to get past the crazy vault door in Hels, not sure how but it probably involved a lot of cussing on Hels part and Wels saying that he never wanted to look at redstone ever again. The portal takes them to the overworld near Xisuma and Jevin. - anonymous

- (scattered au) The first set of non hermits to join this corrupt world are two strangers that apparently came from infinity's grasp. The good news they both spawned at spawn, bad news the brought the tnt duper flying machines, good news that everyone was able to calm them both down. Now the fun begins. Tldr Illmango and Methodz finally get out of the infinity portal. - anonymous

- Loving the Scattered AU. Late to the party, but was looking at the wider MC community reaction to the Hermits vanishing. Once it's clear something bad's happened, would the Legacy crew and whoever else (former Evo squad members like Martyn and Jimmy as well, if they notice Grian go dark) take steps to find out what happened? Would they go to the MCC server (it's kind of a nexus between worlds) & get Noxcrew to try "pinging" the HC server? Would X & other admins see it but be unable to respond? - @/wixelt

- I dont know if anyone has mentioned it but uhhhh, guardian xb? he was a guardian hybrid before everyone got scattered like Ren was already a wolf/dog hybrid. iirc xb spawned in a desert which would be a very interesting place for a guardian hybrid to spawn - anonymous

- Etho has been so, so desperate to avoid dying the same way twice, to stay himself. He hasn't drowned that many times, he thinks. Surely, surely he's starved more often? There's a strange feeling of deja vu hanging over him when he respawns in the ocean, though he can never understand why. Each time the squid finds him, he drowns a little slower, and each time, he glows a little stronger.And he just can't understand, almost refuses to, as he treks from biome to biome, where the small green bumps that line his arms and face came from, how his fingertips seem to almost glow when he scoops a handful of water, how long he finds himself simply staring… at the moon, at sea lanterns, at torches, at lights… He would die a different way every time. He had to. He had to stay Etho. He would not become anything else. - Anonymous

- When Mumbo comes riding into camp on Daisy, it’s easy to see Impulse is not happy about the ravager being there. That’s expected, it’s not exactly everyone’s favorite mob to see around a safe haven. But when Mumbo and Impulse make eye contact, the evoker can’t help but make a simple warding gesture his friends at the mansion taught him- it’s a reflex move. Days later, Mumbo still isn’t sure if Impulse flinched because of Daisy’s sudden growl or his ward. - @/fluffy-papaya

- (From the Discord) What happened to the world: For years, seeds and the land they built had been carefully curated by those known as players, in an effort to make it both easier and more interesting for themselves. But the land doesnt want to be controlled. Their glitched, broken world is a result of the world itself rioting against their presence. Coordinates aren't visible with the debug screen, their coms only serve the world, to tell the players what it knows. Compasses spin wildly in the overworld, for there is no "world spawn" (though coordinates are visible with one in hand. Small mercies are still given). The world resists any further changes by the simple fact it refuses to accept what a hermit communicates. Maybe it's fixable, but maybe... maybe it runs deeper than just their world. (The Legates caused a lot of damage with all those withers, after all.) - @/basaltdragon

- While Iskall is in the desert, he ends up dying quite a few times, enough to adapt, he becomes like a stray, so now, if we have skeleton Etho, we have 3 undead hermits - anonymous

- When everyone is finally gathered and they manage to come together to use all their skills, new and old, the hermits use it to flee back to Season 7. They stay there for months, mostly to heal and adjust to what happened to them. (Trauma isn't easy) Those who have friends or family off server get invited to visit, but the hermits don't leave, they nearly lost each other and they aren't willing to risk it again right now. They'll make a new season 8 at some point, the hermits are too (1/3)restless and too ingrained in their ways to completely disregard how they've always done things, but that will come when they feel better, safer, more put together, when they can finally stop sleeping in a big pile becuase they're afraid the others will disappear. They never go back to that old glitched world, the idea makes them sick, and X starts the new practice of sending in the 'Cam' and/or 'alt' accounts in first to check out the world and set up commands and plugins remotely first. (2/3) What happened before will never, ever happen again he swears it. Next time they might not be so lucky after all [if you can call them all being traumatized, many of them dying over and over again, some being permanently altered, and barely escaping lucky] (also feel free to save these asks for near the end of the au!) (3/3) - anonymous (Shade note: I personally like the idea of them fixing and learning to live in the glitched-out world, but this is another alternate ending!)

- (From the Discord) What happened to the world: Alternatively, what happened is exclusive to their world. (I don't have Dramatic Storytelling for this one, sorry) EX has ADHD to the max, and everything he does is a desperate attempt to get Noticed, to get looked up to and listened to. He's known it was "wrong" for a while, hence why he took X's name and added "Evil", but he never seriously wanted them to hurt. Just to listen to him. He'd meant to come in and fix it all and finally be a hero. He didn't realize, either through haste or inexperience, that he too would be at the mercy of what he'd done.Maybe he does, eventually, make it to where the hermits have gathered. But does he really want to admit everything? (RSD had burned him before, and if there ever was something to place the blame on his head...) - @/basaltdragon

- lasting effects of deaths

- a large amount of assorted ideas

- The bell they put on Daisy was originally of the type that are put on cats, but Grian ended up switching it out with a cowbell because he hated the sound - anonymous

- False, Keralis, Cleo, and Stress make it to spawn, bedraggled and exhausted. Out of all the Hermits, they are some of the last to arrive. Along the way, they’ve encountered trials innumerable that have left them beaten and bruised, but after months of travel, they’ve finally made it.Shortly after leaving the Moobloom field, they came upon an abandoned cart in the middle of a desolate village. With some of the redstone they had found and whatever magic they managed to scrape up, they turned it into a sort of vehicle that allowed them to travel much faster. It had a habit of breaking every six seconds or so, but nothing they couldn’t fix. For the most part. A few accidental combustions aside, they crossed the server in record time.Once at spawn, False has to be forcibly restrained from immediately starting guard duty, and several of the Hermits have to physically wrestle her into a bed in order for her to get some rest. Stress starts up a potion factory the next day, and also starts decorating the spawn with the flowers she’s collected during their travels. Keralis helps out wherever he’s needed, but in his downtime, he constructs an elaborate warren of tastefully decorated, industrial tunnels under the spawn, just in case they might help. Cleo mostly just stays in bed, creating elaborate dioramas and mourning the loss of her zombie side. She’ll get better, but it’ll take some time. And that’s ok with the rest of them. - @/topazastral

- When Doc, Grian, and Ren finally make it to 0,0 there is no fanfare, no dramtic entrance, no revulation. They were travling and suddnly, there was a base, a hermitcraft base, and they could see people. Grian clambers to feet shakily from the shed, nearly falling but Doc and Ren catch him and toghther they help him walk foward and call out to their friends. They are safe now, they're here- Is that mumbo on a ravager what the hell? Wait thats Impluse? Seems like Grian wasnt the only one changed. - anonymous

- Jellie reacting to vex!scar headcanons -she recognises him instantly. The moment she and xb arrive at spawn she darts straight towards him. Of course, she cant figure out why he looks different, but regardless, thats her owner and she demands pets!!!-sometimes she will jump up and try to pounce on his vex wings, because shiny moving thing! Scar picked up on this very quickly and will move out of the way before she gets the chance (vex wings are rather delicate and a pain to get fixed)-whe she's bored, she will always go to mumbo and daisy for attention first. This makes scar rather jealous and she knows that damn well-Scar will sometimes pick her up and fly her around not too far from spawn for a few minutes. Nothing she isnt used to, as he flys with the elytra all the time, but something about flying with vex magic just feels... different. And fun! - anonymous

- Contrary to the enderman bdubs, ender dragon bdubs. His eyes aren't the normal brown, and are instead a bright magenta, he also now has ashen gray horns. - Anonymous

- Scattered AU: The intended world "theme" Xisuma had set up for Season 8 was Large Biomes. This was before anyone knew something was going to go wrong, of course, but it's had a horrible lasting effect in the glitched world. Not everywhere has generated as "large", so when Hermits are travelling they'll sometimes find normal sized biomes, and other times they'll find one biomes that stretches an abnormal distance in all directions. Grian and Doc's mountain range is one of these large biomes. - @/wixelt

- For the scattered au, the snow golem follows Grian and Ren (and Doc) to the spawn haven, for a few days the hermits are wondering what's leaving behind snow trails and zombie flesh, so they decide to have a night watch around this area. Ren volunteered and waited, half-asleep he nearly nearly gets hit with a arrow when he hears the sound of a skeleton getting hurt. He sees the snow golem and uses his sword to kill the skeleton. The snow golem tries to flee but Ren realizes and stops it (1/2)He welcomes the snow golem and introduces it to Grian and Doc, (where the snow golem warns him that it is keeping its eyes on him in its own language). Spooked, Grian tells them that he can understand it, and the golem tells him that he's been following them since their time at the mountain. They decide to give it the name Catmint and it helps guard the hermit's base at night (while giving a stern look at Doc every now and then.(2/2) - anonymous

- (Scattered au)Seeing as we now have 3 different variations of Etho, I raise you: all 3 at once. It turns out Etho was not in fact human, instead a shapeshifter who didn't know that he was, the deaths simply sped up the process, whereas before, while he would change slightly, it was never fast enough to be noticeable - Anonymous

- I had this idea some time ago actually but I thought it was silly but now that the au in ending might as well say it. It doesn't make much sense now with all the new development srry. What if one day Mumbo was callibrating his comunication monstrosity, and suddenly his communicator had signal. He called and called but whoever was a the other side didn't pick up, until they did and Mumbo was overjoyed, but the happiness died down when he could only hear chocked sobs and sharp breathing and (1)teeth chattering. Suddenly a voice whispered, little and fragile "h-h-he-lp". Mumbo knew that voice too well. Before he could even open his mouth to let his best friend he was coming for him, he'd be okay, anything, the breathing stopped. The call was still going, but no one was at the other side anymore, Mumbo hung up with tears in his eyes, and he swore he'd find him and he'd help him. (2) - anonymous

- Scattered AU: While there's still time for them: Mumbo was the furthest Hermit out in the Overworld, & didn't set off for over a year, yet wasn't last to 0,0 (with Iskall) by any stretch. More than half the Hermits seemed to arrive after him. This can be partly attributed to Daisy making good time, but it makes you wonder how many trials & tribulations impeded False, Stress, Cleo and Keralis along the way? How much Ren, Doc & Grian were slowed by Grian's condition? What took xB or Biffa so long? - @/wixelt

- Once everyone finds each other, at the world spawn, after the initial shock, and fixing of the world of course, the hermits all decide to settle much closer to each other. They were separated for quite a while, so it makes sense why they'd decide to keep close. Some groups also make shared bases. - anonymous

- I sort of want grian to be a bit more inhuman so how about grian’s skin on his arms, legs and most of his face permanently blackened by the severe frostbite and the rest of his skin has taken on a bluish tinge, his hair is no longer the Gold it was before but almost snow white with a tinge of dark and light blue, his ears and tail are snow white with what appears to be frost and ice growing on them (1/2)(2/2) grian can not cry because the tears will immediately turned to ice, he can’t swim because if his body touches the water the water will freeze over, his skin is cold to the touch and whatever he moves his body it will make a cracking sounds like breaking glass or smashing ice, no matter how warm it is he can always see his breath... i’m trying to think of more but I’m coming up blank so that’s it hope you like it. - anonymous

- bc i cant stand when cleo is unhappy: the moment she and joe reunite, joe realizes how horrible it is for her to have her body messed with against her will. and as an admin, he can modify her code to put her back to how she was in previous seasons (aka not totally rabid but still undead) - anonymous

- Admins log final day: I'm glad we'll all be able to wake up from this nightmare, and we're able to get an exit portal going thanks to Mango and Methodz having a backup of the key to open the infinity portal's power, we should be able to not only go back in time, but destroy this broken timeline. Were all grateful for them, and I did invite them both to help us incace this happens again. This will be the last day in this timeline, if you somehow found this helmet with these logs, thank you. :-) - anonymous

- Grian, Doc, and Ren find it hard to stay away from each other too long, especially Doc and Ren becuase they've been taking care of Grian for such a long time so they find themselves kinda hovering over him and Grian finds himself seeking them out even when he's with other hermits. The other groups, who've been toghther for awhile, do it too probs - anonymous

- Soon as Grian and Mumbo see each other, they launch themselves at the other and hold on for a long, long time. Iskall join in soon as he wanders by and they talk for hours about what happened, looking over Grian's new fox parts and the blue marks on his hands, Mumbo gray stained hands and magic, and just Iskalls overall experience. Also Grian's little fox buddy absolutely loves Daisy and vice versa. Its not uncommon to see the small fox riding on the ravager's back while Daisy scares people. - Anonymous

- I know I'm a bit out of loop w scattered au & is probably getting things wrong but consider this, when Mumbo accidentally summoned Scar, leaving Bdubs alone, Bdubs freaked out. The very person that meant rescue & hope for him back in the end is now gone, he felt like he's back into the void again and he thought Scar abandoned him because he's too weak & is a burden to Scar. (Yes I am currently drowning in Scardubs angst) - @/anthosaidsmth

- The glitches in the world didn't only happen to the Hermits, it happened to all worlds created in 1.17. The cause remains unknown, though it is believed that something or even someone corrupted/changed the code (what/who is up to imagination. In the case of the latter, so is the motive). My idea, we've already confirmed that Watchers are arrogant jerks so perhaps they couldn't stand the fact that players learned to do things against the rules that they put in place, and did this out of spite. - anonymous

- A bit late but I see all the Fox!Grian headcannons so what if Grian spawned in a jungle and slowly became a parrot hybrid instead? How idk, maybe resorting to eating seeds to prevent himself from starvation because there is no animals in this jungle.

- Here's a thought: The Hels!Hermits were also effected by whatever caused the scattering. They may all hate or annoy each other, but not having each other around to pick on isn't very fun (neither are death loops). Perhaps some of them gain humility over this or learn to be at least a bit nicer to each other and their counterparts. (or some of them find sadistic amusement in their counterpart's miseries) - anonymous

- Finally, once everyone has made it safely to spawn and the problems with the world have been resolved, the season begins. Some of the Hermits may have changed (more than just physically) but over time, they adapt and recover. Grian eventually starts yet ANOTHER war, Tango gets to build DO 2.0 (X is terrified at the fact wardens are involved), and Cleo becomes a coach on 'how to be a mob hybrid' (unless all new hybrids get returned to how they were before by admin powers or just being players). - anonymous

- With all the glitches fixed and all the hermits starting to get back to their normal (Well as normal as it can be after all of these), I wonder if Scar is still a vex. All the hermits just adapted to their situations, but Scar is different, he made a deal with the Vex. - @/anthosaidsmth

- It takes all of the hermits that changed a while to get used to the changes, but eventually they do, mostly through help and support from the other hermits - anonymous

- I had a wee idea and it's a little silly but I like hurt/comfort so maybe after all the scattered au events have passed and the hermits are all together living safely, every winter some hermits invite Grian to their bases to take care of him since the snow and the cold are very bad for him. Sometimes he gets fevers but most of the time he just needs a warm blanket and someone to distract him from the snow. This is also making me wonder if Grian could develop chinophobia (fear of the snow). - Anonymous

- conclusion

Art:

- An Evoker Mumbo

- Evoker Mumbo with Daisy

- Evoker Mumbo summoning Scar

- a Guardian Impulse

- assorted doodles here and here

- A two-part Impulse comic

Writing:

- some Etho lore come back to haunt him (pt 1)

- Cleo sharing mob-hybrid tips with Impulse

- Executioner

- Fish out of water

- Homesick

- Thalassophobia

- The General's Wager (pt 2)

- The Undertow

- Saviors

- Bdubs falling

- For lack of blue shiny rocks (pt 3)

- conclusion (pt 4)

- EX in the Deep Dark

- this road I'm on's gonna turn to sand

- Snapshots

- a multi-chapter Scattered interpretation written just before the real season 8, complete with some outside lore and crossover

- Scattered Across The Map (series of parallel multi-chapter fics)

- One Hundred Thousand Worlds Away

[saby-chan]

Fire Lord Ozai: A blood thirsty monster or the less fortunate “Zuko” of his generation?

Hello again and thank you as always for clicking and allotting some of your time to read my humble post! Since I’ve happened to notice quite an increase in posts lately regarding the controversial character and nature of the former Fire Lord, the now imprisoned fallen prince Ozai, and I’ve personally promised in my previous post that I will share my own analysis on him if people asked me to do so (which actually happened), I am here to deliver my own take on this very intriguing man’s character, while also building a potential past for him based on stuff gathered from the show’s cannon.

I would like to start this essay with what I find to be my favorite quote ever: ”Monster’s aren’t born, they are created.” ~ Naruto Uzumaki (Naruto) What I like about this quote soo much and find very inspirational is the truth it holds within its short, yet powerful message. We are often fast to judge a “book by the cover”, to reduce others to what we assume of them by their appearance or latest actions that we’ve seen them do, but never actually take a moment and wonder where they come from, if this person we soo harshly look down upon really has been this way since their very beginning?

I’ve come across many comments on social media related to ATLA, especially on YouTube videos on which people would throw with harsh comments such as “Aang being a coward for choosing to spare the villain just because they saw a dumb baby pic of them” or “Ozai is the essence of evil and even as a baby he’d been a monster”. I can’t help but wonder who hurt these people to make them be so cruel? Like, how messed up must you actually be to say that a baby, a friggin baby, is the embodiment of all evils? Or that a child was a coward for choosing to see his opponent’s last bits of humanity and opted to spare them?

Aang was soo morally conflicted about the idea of killing Ozai not only because it contradicted the morals of his people, but because he himself understood that this man hadn’t always been the cruel beast he came to met in their first and final showdown. It’s important to note here the fact that upon finding that picture, Aang was actually convinced it had to be Zuko as a baby since it looked so innocent and cute and was actually surprised to learn it was Zuko’s father. And that’s the thing, Ozai was born like us all as an innocent and sweet baby. Babies aren’t in any way evil or twisted, they don’t even have the notion of ‘good’ and ‘evil’ defined in their small, still developing minds. In fact, the very choice of the creators to add this picture in the show is meant to tell us this very thing: this man wasn’t always like this. But if he wasn’t always like this, then what happened to make him become this way?

Well, in order to find out the reason, we must go back in time to the very beginning: Ozai’s childhood and upbringing. For this next part I am going to solely focus on the show cannon, as the comics aren’t the products of BryKe and have a lot of inconsistencies to the source’s cannon (you can go and read my other post on why they fail when it comes to Zuko’s character and his family).

 From what we know and can easily deduce by ourselves just from their appearances, Ozai and his brother Iroh have a huge age gap between them (somewhere between 10 and 15 years). This has to be our first red flag: isn’t it soo odd that this family opted to have their children at such a long distance between pregnancies? It almost feels as if Ozai hadn’t actually been part of his father’s actual family planning... In other words, he was a ‘mistake’ child (I actually hate having to use this terminology, but it will become relevant to when we expand on Azulon’s relationship with his sons). Sure, some may argue that Azulon actually decided to have two sons in case something were to happen to his first born, but wouldn’t it have been more logical to have his second born at 2-3 years max distance from his first? Why choose to have your second child when you are much older and thus risk having a baby with issues, if your sole purpose of this child is to serve as an insurance that you don’t ‘run out’ of heirs? It just doesn’t make much sense, so let’s go for the moment with the possibility that Ozai was an unplanned pregnancy.

This perspective actually gives way to another very interesting aspect: remember the infamous “Born lucky...Lucky to be born” quote? What if I tell you that there is a possibility that this quote wasn’t Ozai’s personal wicked invention, but actually something he himself heard from his very own father? It had been puzzling me for a long time why he choose to say “You were lucky to be born” to Zuko, which implies that Zuko wasn’t supposed to exist. I mean, it’s soo odd that Ozai went with something implying that Zuko was an unplanned pregnancy, since Zuko was the first born. So my theory is that maybe Ozai wanted to convey a different message to Zuko when he said that quote, but due to his anger he ended up replicating the same line he received from Azulon at some point in his childhood. We never got the exact flashback when the line was delivered from Ozai to Zuko, so we don’t have the exact context that lead to it (remember, we are excluding Yang’s take on the matter from the comics).

I mean, this feels like something that wicked old Azulon would have said to his least favorite child. Okay, so let’s go with the scenario that Ozai was an unwanted child, to which we could also add the possibility that Ilah’s health deteriorated after the first birth, which makes plausible the family’s initial decision of stopping at 1 kid.

Moving on, we know from the old ATLA character wiki’s that Ozai’s character design was made with Zuko in mind, being meant to be a grown up version of Zuzu, without the scar. An interesting choice indeed and even Iroh’s letter to Zuko on Ozai from one of the ATLA books describes Ozzy in a similar way to teenage Zuko in book 1: stubborn, feisty, determined and with a volcanic personality (easy to anger and competitive), so it means that these were intentional choices to imply that Zuko and his father are more similar than we were led to believe at first glance. Maybe Ozai was the “Zuko” of his generation. Also, in one of the interviews on the royal family, BryKe stated that Ozai worked very hard to get where he is in book 3, referring to his firebending specifically (we all know how Ozzy got the throne, so clearly, he didn’t “work hard” for that), so maybe he wasn’t always the strongest man alive, with the most exceptional firebending skills out there, like Azula who showed ease in her learning, but rather someone closer to Zuko’s weaker performance as a child, building his way to success through endless hard work until he became the prodigy we know today.

Continuing with our theoretical scenario, after his birth, the second child show’s lesser skills compared to his brother Iroh (by that I don’t mean that he wasn’t gifted at all, but that maybe Ozai wasn’t as fast and great of a learner like his big bro), so Azulon opts to just ignore him and continue focusing solely on his golden child. In my headcannon I actually think that Ilah survived the birth and so she was left in charge of the younger child’s education and upbringing. At this point Iroh is already 10 or older, so he is forced to focus on his development, which prevents him from spending time with his lil brother, but just for the sake of being positive, let’s assume that Ozai still had both his mother and his big brother to keep him sheltered from Azulon’s darkness for a small portion of his childhood.

I choose to believe that Ozai had his mother’s love for a small bit of his childhood due to his willingness in the show to allow Ursa (who mind you, as the granddaughter of Roku was considered a treacherous individual) to spend a ton of time with both Zuko and Azula and share her philosophy with the children, as seeing his wife playing with their children probably reminded him of his own bitter-sweet memories he had with Ilah. They also probably spent a lot of their time near the turtle-duck pond since that pond’s existence prolly dates long before Ozai and Ursa married and had their own children.

Unfortunately, Ilah dies and little Ozai remains all alone, to be influenced negatively by his father (and even by his grandpa Sozin, we don’t really know for certain when the old man died, so he prolly was there for a short time when Ozzy was still a child). Azulon most likely blames Ozai for his wife’s death as the second birth might’ve really had a huge toll on Ilah’s already fragile body, bringing her closer to death, so he still neglects and ignores the child, if not straight out bullies and abuses him for not being on par with Iroh. This prolly leads to Ozai becoming jealous of his brother since Iroh has their father’s love, pushing them further apart. I headcannon that this jealousy between the siblings led to Ozai complaining to his dad when he finally had too much of their father’s discrimination (at a similar age to when Zuko prolly did and got the infamous line, if not younger) only to get the “Iroh was born lucky, you were lucky to be born!” line with the sole purpose of hurting him since now the child knows that he was never wanted.

When Azulon scolds very furiously adult Ozai in Zuko’s memories for daring to ask to be named crown prince, he literally says something like “What, you dare ask me to betray MY own son?!” (this is like red flag number two), line that pretty much testifies how Azulon chose to pretty much treat Ozai as if he wasn’t his son too, showcasing how much he despised his second born and favored the first child over him. Since we are on the topic of their last conversation, the punishment Azulon gave to his son alone proves this man’s level of sadism, which leads me to be believe that Ozai’s childhood was full of this type of punishments for bad behaviors that could be easily corrected trough a long serious lecture or a lesser punishment focused more on teaching him an actual lesson. 

The old wikis also mention on the page about the hall with portraits of the previous Fire Lords that it was the place where Ozai chose to spend most of his time in his youth, seeking advice from his ancestors. I mean, seriously now, if he had a good and supportive father and a present brother in his life, would Ozai had chosen to seek guidance from the dead instead of his living family? That piece of information that was easily overlooked by many proves how lonely this man was in his youth.

So for the most part of his life, Ozai grew up under the toxic influence and abuse of his tyrant father who refused to acknowledge him. Yet he managed to grow up still full of determination to one day prove his worth to Azulon and gain his acceptance (just like we saw with Zuko in book 1, who was desperate to regain his honor and be accepted by his father). But unfortunately, no matter how strong he became or how good of a firebender he was, Azulon was unmoved and unphased by his second son’s performance.

From what we could gather from the little info we received in the show, it seems that Ozai was never sent to the battle field to aid his older brother, being kept as a stay home prince, with the only occasion he actually left home being to search for the Avatar (I don’t think Iroh was sent to do his part on searching the Avatar since he strongly believed that there wasn’t going to ever be one, so it’s safe to assume Azulon assigned Ozai with this mission just to get rid of him for a few years) and the only purpose he ever served to his father was to become part of the old man’s genetics experiment in order to create strong unparalleled firebending offspring (which I am pretty sure were meant to be ‘biological war machines’ used by Azulon in the war, as he didn’t really seem to give a shit about Ozai’s children compared to Lu Ten). So just imagine the level of disappointment and dishonor Ozai must’ve felt as a man and young aspiring soldier to find out that he was going to be used like a ‘non-bending daughter’ in a strategical marriage and never get to serve his country in what he’d been taught was the greatest and most important war for their Nation.

All in all, this marriage didn’t really end up that badly because it seems he and Ursa were actually very compatible. The old wiki for Ursa states that she was a noble woman and the perfect match for Ozai, which leads me to believe that show Ursa was intended to be a very strong willed and determined woman who earned his respect. The show never stated that Ozai never wanted his first born or that he was disappointed with Zuko from birth like the comics say, so it’s safe to assume that Ursa and Ozai actually ended up falling in love at some point since they had not one, but two kids with relatively a short time in between pregnancies. 

There are actually many signs in the show that actually prove that these two loved each other and Ozai didn’t abuse his wife: from the fact that they went every year to see Ursa’s favorite play despite Ozai hating the poor performance of the Ember Island Players (I mean, what man would do such a sacrifice as to endure the same torture every single year just to make his wife happy if he never loved her?), Ursa’s undeniable and sincere love for their children (in the show it was never stated that Ursa saw Zuko and Azula as someone else’s children, so if she were indeed an abused woman who was forced to have these children, she wouldn’t have ever loved them to such an extent, especially Zuko who resembled his father the most physically), the fact that Ursa had equal rights in their marriage and raising of their children (her even scolding and grounding Ozai’s favorite child without hesitation), to the most significant scene to the Urzai ship in Zuko’s flashbacks: Ozai sitting troubled all alone in Ursa’s favorite spot by the pond, in a sad and brooding atmosphere, after he lost her, instead of celebrating what had to be the happiest day of his life since he was finally crowned Fire Lord (it’s clear who had more importance in his heart: Ursa meant more to him than the throne, so losing her outshined his achievement). In fact, Ursa must’ve been the only thing that still kept him outside of the darkness that threatened to swallow his heart and once he lost her, Ozai had nothing else to keep him on the right path.

And even as a father, it seems that Ozai wasn’t always cold and distant to his children, as his true self depicted in Zuko’s memories on Ember Island shows him caring for both of his children, even holding Zuko close to him with a protective arm on the boy’s shoulder. Except the Agni Kai, there don’t seem to be any instances in which he was physically violent towards his son before the banishment (Iroh literally let Zuko in to join that faithful war meeting willingly. Would’ve he done that if he knew his brother to be very violent towards his children in case they disobeyed? If yes, then it would make Iroh actually very questionable on a moral standpoint) and even on an emotional level, I don’t really think that he was actually abusive to him (at least while Ursa was there) because from Zuko’s conversation with Zhao, he’s adamant that his father will take him back and even states "You don't know how my father feels about me. You don't know anything!", meaning that the father he used to know showed him a level of respect and genuine affection (if Ozai were to bully Zuko since the boy’s very early childhood, do you think this kid would grow up to be so sure that his father wants him around and would he defend this bully when someone badmouths them in front of him?).

Even with Azula, despite people demonizing her from early childhood and saying that she was manipulated since birth by Ozai to become a war machine, I do believe that she shows genuine love and affection towards her father. I do choose to believe that back in the good times when the family was happy, Ozai spent quality time with his daughter, filling in the gap left by Ursa’s neglect. I theorize that the reason why kid Azula badmouthed her grandpa and uncle was because she was being very protective of her father: since she used to like spying and eavesdropping, it’s safe to assume that she prolly witnessed many instances in which the old man bullied or insulted Ozai, favoring Iroh over him. It’s a bit harder to see it that way since her snarky comments involve dark topics, but since they live in a society governed by power and war, I see them as something similar to if Azula would’ve said “Uncle sucks and he will surely be fired from his job!” or “Grandpa is old and weak, he should leave the family business to dad!”. Even the fact that the only thing capable of shattering her to pieces was her father leaving her proves how much she cared for him. Ty Lee and Mai’s betrayal was a big blow on Azula’s control and sanity, but she didn’t breakdown until Ozai discarded her after his coronation as Phoenix King. There’s nothing more painful in this world than to be left behind by the person you loved the most and was there by your side your whole life, whom you wanted to follow to world’s end and back. That was the moment Azula finally realized that the father she used to know and love was actually gone and had been in fact, long gone for years at this point.

But if Ozai cared for his family what made him change? Easy, it all comes back to the fact that his father never acknowledged him. The throne doesn’t seem to be his ultimate goal in life since Ozai discarded of the Fire Lord title very easily, tossing it to Azula without any remorse or hesitation. It was more about the meaning behind getting the crown: replacing Iroh in the line of succession was the ultimate proof of his father’s acceptance, that he wasn’t only a “mistake” and “failure” in his father’s eyes, but since Azulon ended up saying and doing what he did, backfired Ozai and made him understand that no matter how hard he tried, the old man will never see him for what he is. So yeah, for a proud man like Ozai this was a hard defeat to swallow, which in turn sparked his strong desire of winning the war and becoming the king of the world: if Azulon wouldn’t accept him even in death, then Ozai will prove to the whole world that he was above his father and his “perfect” brother by accomplishing what they never could and even better and no one was going to stop him, not even his own family.

This is what differentiates Ozai from Zuko: while both had similar upbringings, Ozai never broke away from his obsession of gaining his father’s admiration, allowing himself to fall prey to the darkness left by Azulon in his heart and abandon his true self, only to become the copy of his abuser, while Zuko stood up to his dad and chose his own destiny. If Aang were to come back around 20 or 30 years earlier, then he might’ve actually been able to save Ozai just like he saved Zuko, but unfortunately it wasn’t this way.

Do I think that Ozai could still be saved and redeemed even after the events of book 3? Definitely! Since he’s actually a broken man and still has a tiny bit of humanity left within, I think he still has a chance to change his heart. The only thing is that it’d be a long lasting process: first off he needs to spend a long time in solitude and reflect on his life’s choices and his past, understand where he went wrong and that what happened to him in his childhood is called abuse, which he ended up replicating on his own children. After he understands his wrongdoings and becomes willing to rediscover his true self, he needs to understand the truth about the war, that everything he’d known was fake propaganda and that there was nothing glorious in what he, his father and Sozin did under the excuse of “sharing their Nation’s greatness with the rest of the world!”. But most importantly of all, the only remedy that could possibly save him is love. It sound cliche, but by responding to hatred with more hate like Zuko did in the comics would never change the world “for the better” or bring it “to reality”. The only way to save both Azula and Ozai would be trough showing them the power of love, hope and empathy, how they don’t have to struggle alone and push everyone away. And especially by redeeming Azula, she would be a very important piece in Ozai’s redemption: since he had a closer parent-child relationship with Azula and cared for her the most when he did care, realizing how much he made her suffer through his actions, that would probably break Ozai enough to make him admit that he was wrong all along.

So yeah, this is my analysis on Ozai’s character using the cannon information from the show and old wikis and why I think he is just the product of a very bad environment and an abusive parent who never showed him love (if there’s a reason for why Ozai might be uncapable of showing a healthy parental love to his children is because you can’t show what you’ve never learnt yourself), being the Zuko of his generation who never got to experience the positive influence of an “Uncle Iroh” to guide him on the right path. 

You can agree with me or not on this one, but this is what I choose to believe. Maybe I am way too good by choosing to see any potential good in anyone, but I feel it’s a better way than to counter hate with more hate like Yang did in his monstrous portrayal of Ozai in The Search.

Let me know your thoughts in the comments and if you agree with anything I’ve said, feel free to leave a like and to reblog this post.

See you next time and stay safe! Bye-Bye!

Saby out.

[rosemaidenvixen]

A Secret’s Worth

Chapter 19: Toby

Ao3

Toby's chest hurt so bad it actually felt like someone was literally stabbing him in the heart. Still he didn't slow down, if anything he pedaled even harder. 

The girls were riding neck and neck with him, in just as much of a hurry to reach their destination.

He shouldn’t have flipped out at Jim yesterday. He shouldn’t have thrown back what he knew about the scars on his ankle just because he was pissed. Now this whole thing was ten times worse and it was all his fault.

It had been so hard, watching Jim go home every day for the past month and forcing himself not to say anything, even when Jim started to look more and more anxious every day. But you know who had it even worse? The guy doing the actual suffering.

Toby had heard the phrase victim blaming before, but he never really got it until now. He’d just been so insanely furious hearing Jim yell at them for lying when he hadn’t said an honest thing to them in months, and when they’d been doing everything they could to help him he hadn’t responded right--

The guy’s mom locked him in the basement and slashed up his ankle; what the hell was the ‘right’ way to act after that?

Now Jim was hurt really bad and he’d had to go to the hospital and he wasn’t in school today and he wasn’t answering his phone--

Toby needed to see if Jim was ok.

A throbbing pain that had nothing to do with the strain of pedaling uphill stabbed through his chest.

Or if not ok, alive and kicking.

He skidded to a stop on Jim’s lawn, stumbling off of his bike and running up to pound on the front door “Jim you’ve got about ten seconds to open this door before I’m breaking it down!”

Ok maybe that was the wrong thing to start off with considering he was there to apologize, but Toby would just add it to the list of things to grovel for forgiveness for after he saw that Jim was alright.

And just when he was about to make good on his threat, a hand grabbed his shoulder and started tugging him away. Toby jerked around to see who it was.

“Don’t try to stop me Darci,”

Her expression was soft in a way that made him feel even worse “I’m not, but Toby, I don't think anyone's home. All the lights are off and the car’s gone,” 

He snapped back around, heart plummeting when he saw that she was right. 

Jim and Dr. Lake weren’t here.

“And your Nana’s watching,”

Toby whirled, spotting Phil, one of Nana’s chess buddies, sitting in his car in their driveway with Nana stepping into the passenger seat. He stood there frozen for a few seconds before darting around Darci and sprinting across the cul de sac.

“Nana, wait! Stop stop stop!”

Phil, clearly startled, stopped the car in the middle of the street, Nana rolling down her window and poking her head out “Toby? What on earth is the matter?”

Besides the fact he didn’t want Nana witnessing him busting into Jim’s house, just because Jim had gone radio silent on them didn’t mean that Nana had stopped talking to Dr. Lake. So there was a chance she knew something they didn’t.

He slowed to a stop, panting “Have-- have you- have you heard what’s going on with Jim?”

Immediately her face shifted from confused to contrite “Oh yes Barbara told me, so sad that he got hurt, but he’s doing much better now,”

Toby heard the girls scurry up behind him.

“Do you know when they’ll be home from the hospital?”

“Didn’t Jim tell you?” Nana glanced at Phil, who took the hint and put the car into park before Nana turned and faced them again “They came home about two hours ago, but left for their spring break trip right away, Barbara and Jim won’t be back for about ten days,”

Toby actually felt his jaw drop open.

“B...But…” Claire stammered “Are they seriously going backpacking in Yosemite with Jim being all busted up?”

“I was surprised to, but Barbara said that Jim really didn’t want to miss their vacation, so they’re going to San Francisco and staying in a hotel instead,” the corners of Nana’s mouth tugged downwards into a frown, eyebrows drawing together “Did Jim not tell you any of this?”

Ok she had clearly picked up on the fact that things weren’t ‘Ok’ between Jim and them, and normally Toby would be trying to reassure Nana that everything really was cool, but right now he was too busy concentrating on not puking. 

They were gone. For ten days. Ten whole days Jim and Dr. Lake would be gone.

Plenty of time for another 'animal attack'. 

After an uncomfortably long silence Nana leaned back in her seat and redid her belt “I need to get to my cardiologist appointment now, but we can talk more when I get back,”

With that she nodded at Phil, who looked incredibly uncomfortable, but restarted the car and pulled away, leaving the four of them alone in the cul de sac, with nothing to do but slowly pick up their bikes and trudge into Toby’s garage. 

They’d screwed up. He’d screwed up. He’d screwed up so freaking bad. Yeah Jim was being a gigantic freaking hypocrite about the lying, but his mom locks him in the basement every other Tuesday. Of course the guy wasn’t acting rationally. 

He could still see the terrified look on Jim’s face while they yelled at him yesterday crystal clear.

And just because Jim was being a hypocrite didn’t mean that it wasn’t a dick move to lie to him about calling CPS.

And what they did yesterday….

Toby swallowed back another wave of nausea. Just thinking about what he’d done was enough to make him sick, he wanted to go back in time and smack some sense into himself.

He’d let his anger win out over everything else and started firing back at Jim, and then the girls had followed his lead. Pushing Jim so far over the edge that he went and started a fight with Psycho Steve of all people, who put him in the freaking hospital. Now Dr. Lake had taken him out of town and he wasn’t answering his phone--

His train of thought flew off the rails and crashed to a halt.

Jim and Dr. Lake were gone, and wouldn’t be back for over a week. Which meant that their house was going to be completely empty for that whole time.

Before the idea had even finished forming Toby knew what he had to do.

Immediately after propping his bike up against the wall Toby strode over to the toolbench and grabbed the items he was looking for. A doorstop, an unraveled wire coat hanger, and the biggest pair of bolt cutters Nana had been able to find at Home Depot.

Darci was the first to notice him “What are you doing with all that?”

“Snooping,”

Now Mary and Claire were looking at him to “What do you mean?”

“Jim and Dr. Lake are gone for spring break, and I think we all know that Jim is going to ignore any texts or messages we send. So I’m going straight to the source, I’m going into their house to get some real answers,”

The girls all shared an uncertain look “Toby…” Claire said slowly “You know that if you break in they won’t be able to use anything you find as evidence, right?”

He wilted a little, but tightened his grip on the bolt cutters at the same time “I know, but this might be the only chance to find out what’s really happening to Jim. And if I can figure that out, maybe I can figure out how to get Jim to let us help him,”

Toby turned and then hesitated, dragging the toe of his shoe on the concrete “I won’t ask you guys to come with me, but I need to do this,”

Knowing that if he waited any longer he was going to chicken out, Toby raised his foot and strode out of the garage, making a beeline for the Lake house. After a few seconds he heard footsteps behind him as the girls started to follow.

And even though he knew he’d do this alone if he had to, it felt really really good that he didn’t have to.

Once he got to Jim’s garage, Toby pulled a trash can up to the door and stood on it. Boosting him up high enough to wedge the door stop between the garage door and the frame, reaching in with the coathanger until he snagged the cord and pulled it down within arm’s reach. Cord in hand, Toby yanked until he felt it give, allowing him to slide up the garage door with ease.

Stepping down and picking up the trash can, Toby turned to go put it back when he saw Claire, Darci, and Mary staring at him with big eyes.

“Toby…” Mary said slowly “How did you know how to do that?”

“Oh, uh…” he felt his face heat up “Nana showed me how when Meow Meow PI got locked in our garage, then she made me promise not to tell anyone….so please don’t tell anyone,”

“We won’t but you are going to have to teach us that one,”

Once the trash can was back in place they headed in, Toby pulling the garage door shut behind them “Where should we start?” Darci whispered, even though it was only the four of them in the deserted house.

Toby glanced around, tool bench, picnic coolers, spare fridge, chest freezer-- He froze, eyes locked on the chest freezer pushed back against the far wall. The one that was always kept padlocked for reasons he’d never questioned until now. The only reason he could think of to keep a freezer locked would be--

He shoved the idea away before a picture could form in his head. 

But now he needed to see for himself to make sure that the thought he was desperately trying not to think about wasn’t true.

“Here,” he strode over, and with only slightly shaking hands, cut the metal U of the latch off with two snaps of the bolt cutters, the unopened lock clattering to the floor. It was actually easier than he thought it would be, of course the bolt cutters were ginormous compared to the latch.

The girls gathered in close as he popped the now empty latch and slowly lifted the lid.

First off there weren’t any dead bodies staring back at them, so that was good. It looked like the freezer was just stuffed with regular plastic grocery packages. But why put a lock on ordinary food? Maybe they really were worried about racoons, those were a menace in this neighborhood. 

Despite that perfectly rational, reasonable explanation, Toby couldn’t shake the feeling that something looked off about the food in front of him, something that he couldn’t quite put his finger on.

It only took a few more seconds of staring for him to figure it out. He didn’t recognize any of the labels on these packages. And he and Jim had done a lot of grocery shopping together. Jim going on and on about all the subtle differences in flavor between different items and different brands.

That’s how Toby knew with absolute certainty that this stuff wasn’t anything you could buy at any grocery store in Arcadia Oaks. Because in all of their trips shopping together, they’d never bought any of the items in this freezer.

Reaching past him, Claire gingerly picked up something shrink wrapped in blue and yellow plastic “Beef sweetbreads?”

Toby eyed the package suspiciously “Bread doesn’t come from beef,”

“Sweetbreads aren’t bread, they’re organ meat,”

“Ew,”

“Hey they’re actually pretty good when you cook them right,”

Even more curious now, they all started reaching in and rifling through the frozen packages in front of them.

“It looks like this is just a bunch of meat,” Darci said while holding up a bag of beef bones by the corner between her thumb and forefinger.

Mary wrinkled her nose at a package of chicken livers “Yeah, but I’ve never seen Jim cook with any of this stuff,” she peered in Toby’s direction “Have you?”

His mouth went dry, nausea creeping back in “No, I haven’t,”

They kept digging, plastic packs of meat piling up on the floor around them, and the deeper they went the weirder things got. Eventually hitting what looked like whole small animals, cleaned and skinned and sealed in shrink wrap. Toby lifted one of them out, guts squirming in his belly “Guys, what are these?”

Claire leaned over and read off a tiny label on the corner of the package “It says whole rabbit,”

This kept getting freakier and freakier, Jim had never cooked rabbit meat before, let alone roasting them whole. 

Darci and Mary cleared off the rest of the rabbits to uncover a massive package at the bottom, one that would have taken all four of them to lift out, bright red of raw muscle showing clearly against the white of the freezer. But unlike everything else in here, this one had clearly been opened and resealed multiple times, with chunks of meat taken off, proving that someone was taking stuff out of this freezer and using it on a regular basis 

“This one says whole bison leg,” Darci said quietly.

A chill went through him, and not because he was standing in front of an open freezer.

“Oh my god, I just can’t--” Mary darted away, running to the wall farthest away from the freezer and slumping against it, gasping and shaking. Claire immediately ran over and put an arm around her shoulders, leaving Toby and Darci standing in front of the freezer.

“Toby,” Darci’s voice was a monotone, her eyes locked on the frozen leg in front of them “Are you absolutely sure that Jim never cooked with any of this stuff,”

“Positive,”

“Then...what do they do with all this?”

Toby’s stomach shrank in on itself “I don’t know,”

Were they trying to bait racoons or something? It was the only thing Toby could think of, but if they were, why? And he was pretty sure there was a lot cheaper stuff out there they could use for racoon bait. But if they weren’t using it as bait then what they hell were they doing with all this weird meat? And why the lock?

Pulling in a deep breath through her nose, Darci slowly started putting the packages they’d taken out back in the freezer “Ok, we’re not going to find anything else out here, we need to clean up and keep looking,”

Fighting past the painful tightness in his abdomen, Toby grabbed a rabbit and joined her. Claire eventually came over to help them, but Mary stayed far away until the lid of the freezer was shut.

“Um, Toby…” she said, walking back up to join them “How are we going to put the lock back on when you cut it off?”

“Easy,” he walked over to the toolbench and picked up a small bottle “Instant set Gorilla glue,”

And with two quick dabs of glue and Mary holding the pieces for him, the lock and the latch looked nearly as good as new. The latch did look a little funky from where the cutters had gone through, but Toby was pretty sure Jim and Dr. Lake wouldn’t notice it.

Now time to search the rest of the house.

Toby headed through the side door into the main house with the girls just behind him, pausing just inside the hall while he tried to figure out the best place to search first.

“Let’s look in Dr. Lake’s bedroom,”

All three of them slowly turned towards Mary.

“I mean…” her cheeks filled with red “If she’s hiding something chances are it would be in there,”

Claire nodded at that “You’re right, let’s go,”

The girls headed towards the stairs, but Toby hung back. Darci paused at the foot of the stairs, glancing back at him “Everything ok Toby?”

Even knowing what he knew, about the basement and the scars and all the other strange stuff. There was a part of him that still thought of Dr. Lake as….Dr. Lake. His friend’s fun, sometimes goofy mom, the one that took them to theme parks and gave the best presents on birthdays and holidays, who was never too busy to talk and always happy to see him. Going into her room and snooping through all her stuff felt...wrong.

All the girls were looking at him now, seeing what the hold up was.

Toby clenched his jaw and raised his head.

But no matter how bad he felt about it Toby couldn’t let his guilty conscience get in the way. Dr. Lake….Dr. Lake wasn’t who he thought she was, and Jim was in real trouble. This was the only way he could help him. That meant he had to suck it up and follow through.

He’d come this far already.

“Y-- yeah I’m fine, let’s go,” Toby forced his feet to move and followed them up the stairs into the back bedroom. His throat tightening when he saw Mary dive straight into going through her dresser, even as he set aside his tools and got down on his knees to join her. 

They spent nearly two hours going through the room from top to bottom. Searching the closet, every drawer in the dresser, under the bed and in the nightstand, every single nook and cranny in the room, even under the mattress. But they didn’t find anything. Just clothes, jewelry, and books.

Toby glumly replaced the socks back in the drawer he pulled them out of. If there was anything hidden in the house it wasn’t in here. So all they’d managed to accomplish was violating Dr. Lake’s privacy. But if there wasn’t anything in her bedroom then where else would--

“Toby,” Claire spoke up, startling him “Do you know if this house has a crawlspace, or an attic?”

He paused with his hand halfway out of the sock drawer. The Lakes had both a crawlspace and an attic. He’d seen the crawlspace, a small cubby in the basement full of their Christmas decorations, but the attic--

Dr. Lake had only mentioned once that they did have an unfinished attic, even shown him where it was.

And then said that he should never ever go up there.

“Their crawlspace is full of Christmas decorations, but I’ve never seen inside the attic. Dr. Lake said it was off limits,”

That got the girls’ attention.

Mary got to her feet “Where is it?”

“Closet, in the ceiling,”

Immediately they all made a beeline towards the closet, Mary pulling open the doors and revealing the square cut out of the plaster in the ceiling. 

Claire frowned “How is one of us supposed to get up there?”

“I’ll do it guys,” Darci stepped forward, shoulders square and mouth set in a firm line “I’m the tallest, just give me a boost,”

Positioning themselves directly under the hole, Mary and Claire each grabbed one of Darci’s legs and lifted, allowing Darci to push aside the cut out square of ceiling and poke her head into the darkness of the attic beyond.

“A little higher guys, I need to get a good grip to pull myself up,”

Claire and Mary obliged, raising Darci until she was waist deep in the attic, allowing her to kick off from the palms of their hands and vanish into the dark hole. After a few seconds Toby saw a small light, which had to be from Darci’s cellphone, blink on, illuminating the bare wooden beams of the unfinished space. 

“You see anything Darc?” Mary called up at her.

The light bobbed around in the small space above them, ceiling creaking under her as Darci moved around “Nothing so far, there’s a lot of fiberglass insulation so I have to be careful not to…”

All of a sudden the creaks stopped, the light staying frozen in one spot.

“Darci,” Toby forced the strangled word out “What’s going on?”

Things were silent for a few more seconds before they heard her voice again “There’s a box here guys, and it doesn’t look like Christmas decorations,”

With some tricky maneuvering, Darci managed to push the box down the hole, where Toby and Claire caught it. Quickly moving it off to the side so the three of them could catch Darci as she jumped down. Once she managed to untangle herself from them they all turned their attention back to the box.

Toby pushed it out of the closet so there was enough room for all of them to huddle around it. The box was about the size of a microwave, dark metal and surprisingly heavy for its size. It looked like one of those heavy duty water/fire/apocalypse proof boxes, and fortunately it wasn’t locked, meaning they wouldn’t need the bolt cutters. Trembling, terrified of what he might find, Toby popped the latches and lifted the lid. 

Part of him was worried that when they opened it they wouldn’t find anything but boring adult papers, bills and insurance stuff like that, but one look and he knew that wasn’t going to be the case.

Inside were two black bags, a large plastic one and a small felt one, and some kind of weird plastic rectangle. Mary reached in and pulled out the small bag first.

They all watched her tug the drawstrings open, not even daring to breathe as she turned the bag over and dumped the contents out. 

A bunch of loose teeth and a bundle of black hair in a rubber band tumbled onto her hand.

Just when Toby thought this couldn’t get any more confusing “What the hell is all that?”

Claire poked at one of the teeth sitting in Mary’s palm “This looks like stuff from an animal,”

It certainly did. That hair could easily be fur, and those teeth would have been right at home on a bear’s mouth. Big and sharp and clearly from a meat eater.

A locked freezer full of strange meat, animal parts hidden away in the attic. Toby still couldn’t put the pieces together, but it wasn’t shaping up to be anything good.

They spent a good minute staring at them before Mary poured the teeth and hair back in the bag “We aren’t going to learning anything by staring at teeth, let’s keep going,”

Claire grabbed the large bag just as Mary was replacing the small one, setting it in front of her and untying the straps to peer down inside.

Toby crawled closer “What is it? What’s in there?”

“It looks like...bath bombs,”

“What? No way,” Darci scooted up to Claire’s side and glanced down at the open bag “Huh, it does look like bath bombs,”

It took Toby a few seconds to realize they weren’t talking about actual explosives “Bath bombs,” he said incredulously “You mean like those fizzy scented things you put in the tub, those kind of bath bombs?”

Claire got to her feet “Only one way to be sure, follow me guys,,”

They tailed after Claire down the hall into the bathroom, where she promptly started filling the tub. Once there was about a half a foot of water inside she reached into the bag, pulled out a grainy pink ball, and dropped it in the water.

As they gathered in close and watched, a cloud of pink bubbles fizzed up around the sphere, filling the tub with pink foam and the scent of--

“Huh,” Toby sniffed “Roses,”

Mary reached a hand into the water, swirling it around before emerging slightly pink “It looks like they are just bath bombs,”

Ok this was getting really weird. Bath Bombs and animal parts weren’t exactly criminal, but what were they doing locked up in a secret attic box?

For a long time Toby had thought that the curfew and the locking in the basement was because of what Nana told him. That Dr. Lake was so scared of losing Jim she’d started doing some messed up things in order to keep him.

But after learning about the scars he started wondering if that was actually true. And now after seeing the meat and the animal parts and the bath bombs…

It was starting to look like all of this was just scratching the surface of something a lot bigger.

And there was still one more thing to check out.

After draining and rinsing the tub, they all went back to the bedroom and gathered around the box again, where Toby picked up the final item inside it, the plastic rectangle.

He turned it over a few times, trying to figure out exactly what it was when it clicked, filling him with a jolt of exhilaration.

“Guys I think this is some kind of book,”

Books meant data, information. Maybe even the answers behind the bath bombs, teeth, and weird meat.

Mary kneeled down next to him “Can you get it open?”

“I’m trying, but there’s a combination lock, and the thing’s completely sealed so I can’t just bust it open with the bolt cutters without destroying it, and--”

They all jumped as a deafening chime rang through the house.

The doorbell.

Toby’s heart shot up into his throat like lightning, beating hummingbird fast as the bell kept ringing again and again. 

Hearing the sound shattered his focus like a harsh slap, forcing Toby to remember exactly where he was and what he was doing.

He was in someone else’s house.

They’d come in without permission by breaking into the garage. 

They were breaking and entering.

They were committing a crime.

If they got caught it wouldn’t be extra homework or detention they had to deal with.

If they got caught they would get in real trouble.

For the first time Toby knew he wasn’t being melodramatic when he imagined getting arrested and sent to juvie.

Toby shot his head up and saw that the girls had the exact same panicked, horror-stricken looks on their faces that he knew he had on his. From down below the doorbell kept ringing again and again.

The locked book slipped from his hands and fell to the carpet with a dull thunk.

Oh fuck. 

“Guys we need to get out of here now!”

They all simultaneously jumped to their feet, Claire practically throwing the bag of bath bombs back in the box, and after fumbling with it for a few seconds Toby managed to toss the book in after it, Darci slamming the lid shut while muttering ‘oh god’ over and over again.

Frantically dragging the box back towards the closet, they figured out really fast that getting the box up was going to be a lot harder than getting it down, especially considering they were all freaking out. After running around like idiots for a few seconds, they got it together enough to hoist Darci up to the attic again, and then raise the box to where she could grab it and put it back, before dropping down from the attic herself. 

Meanwhile the doorbell continued to ring over and over, each chime practically giving Toby a heart attack, as they raced around the room, replacing items and shutting drawers and removing every trace of their snooping.

“Claire what the hell are you doing!?” Mary hissed.

Toby glanced over to see Claire standing in the doorway staring down the stairs to where the front door was “C’mon Claire we have to hoof it before Jim and Dr. Lake come in!”

“But...why would Jim and Dr. Lake be ringing the doorbell of their own house?”

Toby, Mary, and Darci all stopped dead

Claire was right, if Jim and Dr. Lake were back they’d just come right in without even touching the doorbell. But then who was ringing it? If it was just a salesman or something wouldn’t they leave as soon as they figured out no one was home? Whoever this was had been ringing the doorbell for nearly five minutes with no sign of stopping.

“New plan!” Mary piped up, voice a full octave higher than normal “Sneak out the back, then circle around through the bushes, act like we’re just out walking and see who it is,”

Toby nodded shakily along with Claire and Darci, leave it to Mary to come up with a plan under extreme pressure.

After double checking and making sure they’d gotten rid of all evidence of their break in, Toby grabbed his tools and ran to the stairs “Quick guys, go go go!” 

Not wasting a second the girls scampered down the stairs on light feet, Toby following after, the unrelenting doorbell even louder on the first floor.

They made a beeline for the back door, Toby going out last and locking it behind them. Following them, he ran over to the fence and, in a feat only possible to the insane amount of adrenaline shooting through his veins, hopped it in two bounds and dove into the shrubbery, joining the girls. 

“Everyone ok?” Darci whispered, crouching low in the undergrowth.

“Yeah,”

“Uh huh,”

“Yep,”

It was all Toby could do not to collapse, gasping for breath and quivering all over from equal parts relief and leftover panic. 

They’d gotten away with it. He was pretty sure they’d gotten away with it. No one had seen them and they hadn’t left any evidence behind. Although they hadn’t had time to wipe their fingerprints off of everything, or get rid of their DNA, hopefully Jim and Dr. Lake wouldn’t realize that their house was broken into at all. And even if they did there was no reason for the four of them to be suspects.

They were fine. No one was going to get arrested.

Although now that the adrenaline was starting to fade, Toby was pretty sure he was going to have some wicked bruises from his landing. 

Mary sank lower the the ground, perched on her hands and knees “Keep to the plan guys, let’s sneak around to the other side,”

They all followed her lead, Toby forcing his breathing to slow and become quieter, crawling through the bushes until they emerged on the sidewalk around the corner. Standing and shaking off the leaves and branches, Toby tucking the cutters, hanger, and stopper in a bush to retrieve later. 

“Let’s go,” Mary took the first steps towards Jim’s house. A few months ago Toby would have thought she was completely relaxed about the whole thing, but now he could see just how on edge she was.

Toby walked after her, along with Claire and Darci, trying to be as casual as humanly possible without completely overdoing it. 

Nothing to see here. Just a group of teens out walking around, as teens did. No criminals here.

He had to try especially hard to act normal as they were heading around the corner of the block, breath catching in his chest as Jim’s house, and the mysterious bell ringer came into sight. 

It was some scruffy looking guy, messy looking beard and jeans and a jacket that had certainly seen better days. Not a particularly scary looking guy, but it certainly didn’t look like he was there to sell anything.

Feeling bolder now that they were out in broad daylight and not at risk of being caught mid-felony, Toby came right up to where the front steps met the sidewalk, the girls stepping up next to him, with scruffy standing less than ten feet away. Fidgeting and pressing the bell every ten seconds or so, face crimped in frustration.

Of course this close they should have realized it was inevitable that the mysterious scruffy man was going to notice them.

“Oh hey!” he jogged across the porch towards them, causing them all to shuffle backwards involuntarily “You kids know the people who live here?”

“Why do you want to know?” Mary said warily

“Oh-- I heard from my buddy that CPS has been sniffing around, and Barb took Jim out of the hospital without checking him out yesterday, so I’m trying to see if they’re ok,”

Instantly uneasy, Toby glanced over at the girls, the three of them looking just as tense as he felt. The whole leaving the hospital without being checked out was news to him and definitely not good. But even more alarming was the fact that although this guy apparently knew Jim and Dr. Lake, Toby had no idea who he was. And by the looks of it, neither did Darci, Claire, or Mary.

“So do any of you know when they’ll be back?”

Claire took half a step forward “Sorry but...who are you again?”

“Oh! Well I…” scruffy trailed off, letting out a gusty breath and running hand through his hair “You see I’m--” all of a sudden he cut off and looked over at them sharply, Toby flinching as the man locked eyes with him.

“Toby! Come on, you know me, right bud?”

His heart stopped, blood running cold. From the corners of his vision he could see the girls pull around him protectively “Who are you, how do you know my name?”

“Come on,” the man grinned, as if they were all old buddies “You know me, from back when I used to live here,”

Toby just kept staring at him blankly. Used to live here? The only person he could think of that used to live here was--

No. It couldn’t be.

He looked at him again, really looked, comparing the shape of the jaw, the scraggly beard to the ones from his murky, half faded memories.

“Hang on,” Toby slowly raised a finger to point at the stranger who might not be a stranger “You mean that you’re--”

“That’s right,” he flashed them a smile, painfully familiar now that he could see the resemblance “I’m Jim’s dad,”

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

@sajdd

Ok since one singular person asked for this the Big Explanation for Everything In My C!Tommy Design.

General:

c!Tommy, in general, I always try and find a balance between my really soft style and c!Tommy's rougher personality. I draw him with soft features but very sharp eyes, both to make his facial features distinct from cc!Tommy and a contrast to c!Tubbo who I draw with less rounded features but much softer eyes. I try and keep his usual expressions slightly smug and self-assured, to get across c!Tommy's bravado.

I generally draw him with tanned skin, as I imagine he’d spend a lot of time outdoors. This does vary on the arc I’m drawing him in, though, for example he’s much less tan in Pogtopia because he has less access to natural light whereas he’s more tan in exile due to not having much shelter from the sun. This is also done to make the pale scar on his nose bridge more noticeable- it’s one of the two scars I draw Tommy as having from the beginning, as I feel it shows c!Tommy's scrappy, determined personality very well. The other scar is a long jagged vivisection scar which is there to show my labinnit headcanon lol.

While I draw c!Tommy with varying hairstyles and lengths, I always draw him with curly textured hair that’s a very pale blond. I also draw his hair as leaning to one side and partially covering his eye, similar to how I draw c!Wilbur's hair, to show their closeness. I also draw c!Tommy with similar wings to c!Wilbur and c!Philza- specifically, I draw them with the same starry night sky pattern I do with c!Philza, but a lot smaller and atrophied.

I really like putting lots of fun design elements in characters eyes because drawing eyes is fun and c!Tommy is no exception! I draw his eyes a very bright electric blue, and I use a small brush and very light varied colours to make them look like they’re filled with little stars. I also give him red pupils to match his main colour association in either the shape of a full or broken heart depending on the arc. I went with a heart design to show his hidden kindness and loyalty.

There’s also a lot of design elements that are admittedly there primarily because I enjoy drawing them, and less for any specific reason. The fangs do have the most reason, to help show c!Tommy's rougher personality, but I also just like drawing fangs lol. (I also draw him with braces in every arc, since I imagine he couldn’t get them removed in exile and he didn’t have the time to care afterwards). I also draw him with bioluminescent, starlike freckles and a strange blood colour which is also used to help texture the skin (well, slightly, it’s not super noticeable but it’s pink instead of red) which are both just things I like to draw.

Also, this is a small detail, but I always draw c!Tommy with a Church Prime necklace (unless I forget it which I do sometimes lol). It’s a good way of showing his faith through a quick look.

Fun fact, what’s probably most noticeable about my c!Tommy design is that as soon as Tommy made the joke about his character being made in a lab I picked it up and ran with it, specifically the idea of him potentially being a clone of c!Philza. I draw them with identical facial features and hair colour/texture, though a lot of the more supernatural features of c!Philza are toned down on him. That’s specifically because due to my hc that c!Philza is an angel and angels as ageless it’d be impossible to clone them exactly so c!Tommy has some random human/hybrid dna thrown in haphazardly (which also makes him a mess of instincts from pretty much every animal ever lol)

Disc War:

I really like the headcanon that c!Tommy was nine during the L'Manburg war entirely because its really funny to imagine c!Wilbur looking at this literal nine year old and being “yes, my right hand man, responsible enough to help manage a nation in my stead,” so c!Tommy is roughly 9ish around this time in my design.

During the early Disc War is probably the only time I actually draw c!Tommy as close to his actual Minecraft skin lmao. It helps show that, despite the fact I don’t hc him as human he is mostly just a normal kid. I don’t draw c!Tommy in the traditional red and white t-shirt entirely just because I want to make sure he’s not mistakable for Dave Strider though. I have him in a white button-up shirt, a red and white hoodie, cargo pants, and trainers.

During this arc, I draw c!Tommy's hair as fairly short and very similar to how I draw c!Wilbur, as this was back when he idolised his brother and I think drawing their hair so similar shows that well.

L'Manburg:

This covers the time from the beginning of the L'Manburg war up to c!Tommy's second exile to Pogtopia, so this design covers a period of years from when I hc c!Tommy was nine up until about thirteen.

During the war, c!Tommy wears his uniform without modification, except for of course wearing his Prime necklace, but afterwards he and the rest of the residents of L'Manburg (except c!Wilbur) slightly modified their uniforms to better fit their own tastes. Specifically, he wears his trainers instead of combat boots, loose trousers instead of shorts, and a slightly shorter and short-sleeved revolutionary jacket, for easier mobility.

During the war, his two canon deaths left him permanent injuries and scars. His death in the final control room, where he broke his leg during his desperate attempt to escape, left that leg permanently weakened (along with being badly scarred) and requiring a leg brace to help him stand and walk properly. The arrow through his skull during his duel with c!Dream left him with a large scar on his temple, covering his brows in crack-like scars which also leave him with frequent migraines.

During the L'Manburg arc, c!Tommy's hair in my design still looks like c!Wilburs as they were still close during this arc.

Pogtopia:

Since Pogtopia apparently lasted two years (which is probably from Cursed Timeline Lore but I love cursed lore it’s hilarious,) c!Tommy would be around 13 to 15 here.

In Pogtopia, I draw c!Tommy as wearing similar clothes to during the Disc War arc, however, I also add on a loose belt holding knives, to show c!Tommy's increased need for self defence along with his fondness for knives lol. I actually don’t do the bandanna design with c!Tommy and c!Tubbo a lot of people do mostly because I couldn’t figure out how to get it to work with c!Tommy's hoodie. They have an equivalent but it’s later on alas.

As c!Tommy and c!Wilbur get more distant, c!Tommy grows out his hair slightly, and wears it tied in the back in a short ponytail.

Exile:

Oh I have a lot of things to talk about here >:). As a quick note to my messed up timeline, c!Tommy would be 15 here.

During exile, c!Tommy wears the same clothes as he did in Pogtopia initially, though due to lack of care and supplies, they eventually of course fray and rip. He also wears c!Wilbur's old ragged longcoat, even though it barely keeps out the cold, the smell of alcohol and cigarettes weirdly comforting. Over time, he rips up his shirt for bandages to the point he’s not wearing anything under his hoodie. His leg brace breaks and he makes a new one out of branches and leaves. (He could ask c!Dream, but he doesn’t want to be fucking reliant on him, relying on pity handouts like a child, so he won’t.)

Eventually, since c!Dream doesn’t exactly want c!Tommy to get hypothermia and die anticlimactically, he gives c!Tommy one of his capes. This is one of my favourite character design decisions I’ve made lmao. I specifically draw it looking too-big, despite the fact that doesn’t make much sense because they’re the same height, so it looks almost like he’s getting enveloped in c!Dream's green shades, and it also hides c!Tommy's wings which helps reinforce the loss of freedom.

c!Tommy gains… a lot of scars over exile. I mean he was literally hit by an axe multiple times. Specifically they’re primarily around the shoulders or the torso. I also draw him with a Glasgow grin, specifically curved to resemble Dream's mask, along with smaller, self inflicted, scratch and bite marks covering his arms. In addition, due to him barely eating I draw c!Tommy from this point onwards looking very scrawny. This is also where c!Tommy's pupils change from hearts to broken hearts! They never turn back :)

During exile, Tommy's hair grows out a lot, down to just past his shoulders, in a matted mess. c!Dream used to braid it at the back, like how I draw c!Dream's own hair, but it very quickly grew too matted with saltwater, mud, and blood to style :) :) :)

Bedrock Bros:

c!Tommy turns sixteen here during my scuffed timeline.

c!Tommy patches up the rips and tears in his clothes. He can’t fully salvage his cargo trousers, so he turns them into shorts. He makes his own shoes out of leather to replace the ones he lost. There’s a gaping hole in his hoodie pocket that couldn’t be stitched up. He'll patch it up later. c!Techno gives him one of his capes to keep him warm, fur lined and arctic blue with silvery snowflakes embroidered on. c!Tommy has to be reminded, or he puts on the green cape, turned a dull viridian from the sun, that makes him feel both safe and so, so afraid.

Scars heal, but never fully fade. Still, his eyes brighten again, somewhat, even if the bags under his eyes less disappear and more just turn a strange gold. He finally has the time to clean out his hair, and c!Techno ties it into a short, loose braid at the back. With the cape, he almost looks like c!Techno like that. Obviously, the visual implication here is to show that even though it’s obviously not exile, c!Techno is still suppressing c!Tommy's identity, albeit unknowingly (and the gold is from his constant eating of golden apples).

Final Disc War:

By this point, c!Tommy's back to just wearing his old clothes, tattered and frail as they might be. He finds his old sneakers, and day by day he sees himself in the mirror a bit more than the gunpowder on a battered trenchcoat, blood on a smiley face mask, wither rot on the edges of an elaborate snowy cape. He patches the hole in his hoodie with a piece of the fabric from one of c!Tubbo's old shirts. He lends him one of his too-small hoodies so he can do the same.

He still braids his hair, but in his own way, in a tightly woven ratstail braid more for convenience than for aesthetics. Character design wise, it’s another way to show c!Tommy's openly rougher personality than say, c!Dream or c!Techno, and so’s the patchwork clothes and rough shorts and scars. Like I said, maintaining a mix of rough and soft is very important to me in how I draw c!Tommy, and I’m very satisfied with how I pull it off here and in the next entry.

Revival:

the story has handed me the opportunity to make my favourite boy undead. i will not pass up the opportunity to make my favourite boy undead.

After revival, c!Tommy stops aging, at least in appearance. His skin… less pale, more colourless and almost grey. One of his eyes glows a pure, empty white now, like ghosts do, and the white messy streak in his hair doesn’t glow but it’s white enough it might as well.

The injuries of his death bear apparent on his form. His limbs can bend at impossible angles, his entire body covered head to toe in bruises. Two black eyes cover his face like a raccoon mask, and the ugly mottled marks of strangulation on his throat stand out like a sore thumb. You cannot look at him anymore and not see that he hasn’t died. He avoids mirrors again.

There’s stranger things, too, like how he doesn’t bleed anymore, any cuts just revealing an impossibly dark void beneath his marble-cold skin. Sometimes he goes weeks without eating, the hunger only hitting once he realises. He feels so tired, so cold, in a way not even the touch of fire can stem at all. He doesn’t have a heartbeat, or breathe.

Initially, he was too tired, too out of it to even consider cutting off or dying the white streak. When he wasn’t, he’d soon learn any attempts were futile, dye fading in mere days, cut off hair half regrown in a week. It should bother him more, but he just feels numb.

[stxrrywildflower]

bonnie and clyde

pairing - spencer reid x reader

summary - you and spencer dress up for the annual bau halloween party

warnings - gore makeup details

though it had become a lot more talked about in the past few years, the bau always hosted some form of a halloween party for all agents.

spencer rarely went, much rather preferring to stay home and curl up on the couch watching spooky movies. though halloween was in fact his favorite holiday, going to a party with lots of people just seemed like an actual nightmare.

this year was different. he was dating you now and once you caught news of the party from emily, you pushed him to go.

“come on spencer, it’s literally my job to do makeup like this. it would be so fun,” you pleaded.

“you know sometimes i forget you’re an sfx artist,” he trailed off, toying with the corners of the book page. you sat down beside him, resting your legs over his and wrapping an arm around his neck. “and this is the perfect reminder.”

spencer sighed. “what do you have in mind?”

“wait so that’s a yes?” you bit your lip to hide your grin. there were endless possibilities for couples halloween costumes. “that’s a yes,” spencer confirmed.

you broke out into a grin, hugging him tightly before standing up once more. “this is going to be so great. i already have lots of ideas for us to do as a couples costume. i’ll probably need some new products but it’s honestly fine,” you spoke.

spencer laughed at your rambling, going back to his work with a small smile on his face. was he a little scared? honestly, yes. but it was well worth it to see you happy.

over the next few days, you went through your various work portfolios to find a costume idea that would work.

you finally narrowed it down to four; beetlejuice and lydia, bonnie and clyde, jack skellington and sally, or just two skeletons. all of them would be heavy with the makeup and super fun for you to dress up as.

when presented to him, spencer looked deeply into the photos.

“i like these,” he spoke, pointing down to the bonnie and clyde set of photos.

“really?” you asked.

spencer nodded. “yeah, they’re my favorites.”

“so bonnie and clyde?”

“bonnie and clyde,” spencer confirmed.

sure it was a bit ironic that you were dressing up as criminals but hey, it was halloween and most bets were off. you were sure the others attending were doing the same.

you and spencer both already owned most of the things you needed; most of the costume details were done with your sfx makeup anyway.

____

the day of the party, also halloween, you and spencer thankfully got to sleep late. he didn’t have work and either did you allowing for you both to actually spend a morning in together.

“morning petal,” spencer greeted, voice still scratchy from just waking up.

you hummed against his shoulder, “morning.”

the two of you layed around for a bit longer, savoring the time you had together prior to your commitments that night. when you were finally a bit more awake, you gave spencer his instructions for the day.

“i need you to head in and shower. make sure to wash your face,” you told spencer.

“are you showering too?”

you nodded. “i will eventually. i just have to get everything out first so we can save some times.”

spencer pulled you back down towards him, resting his hands loosely on your waist. “you know how we could save some time?” he asked. you quirked your eyebrow. “how?”

“showering together,” he answered cheekily.

you rolled your eyes. “fine, but no funny buisness.”

“uh huh, no funny business,” spencer grinned.

once you two were finished in the shower, you were probably in there longer then intended for obvious reasons, you started to actually get ready for the party.

as spencer got changed into his costume, you slipped on just a pair of shorts and a t-shirt; you could change once you were done with your makeup later.

you had everything set up in the kitchen table as it was easier with lighting and both space.

“bada bing,” spencer spoke with an accent, strolling into the room a few minutes holding his suspenders out in front of him. “bada boom,” you finished.

his clyde outfit consisted of black dress pants, a white button up shirt, suspenders and a hat, and then his usual dress shoes. you, however, had made the shirts both bloody and scuffed with other marks to add onto the effect.

you grinned at him as you finished applying the last few touches of your more natural makeup; you would start on the sfx in the few moments.

“how do you feel?” you asked.

“like a million bucks,” spencer replied, clearly proud of the horrible pun he had made about the couple you were dressing up as. “perfect,” you spoke.

“now i need you to sit down right here,” you pointed to the chair. spencer did as he was told, grabbing a book off of the shelf as he did so.

you started off with a light foundation that matched spencer’s already pale skin. your boyfriends face scrunched up at the feeling of the wet makeup on his face. adding on the pressing of the beauty blender, spencer was not loving it.

“you need to stop scrunching up,” you commented. spencer frowned. “babe i can only try so hard. it’s my faces natural reaction.”

once foundation was finished, you moved on to general dirt and other scuff marks. the biggest part of your costume thag held it all together was the single gunshot wound on the forehead.

“alright so now i’m actually working with fake blood and some scar wax for this. it’s going to feel a bit cold when i add all of the liquids for the gunshot. does that sound okay?” you asked.

“wait a gunshot?”

you nodded, “yup. i’m doing on me too. it adds to the whole concept.”

“yeah well let’s hope that doesn’t happen anytime in the future,” spencer spoke.

spencer once again flinched as you started applying the dough like substance onto the center of the forehead. it took you a few minutes to get it into the proper shape before you added makeup to make it look like an actual wound.

“i need you to shake your head a bit,” you commanded once adding the blood. “perfect. honestly, i think you’re ready to go. do you want to see?”

spencer nodded excitedly. you turned the mirror you had placed on the table to show him his reflection. he immediately broke into a grin. “i love it,” spencer spoke. “you’re amazing.”

he leaned up to kiss you gently. “this is so cool,” he added.

“alright i’m going to go get changed. just stay here and please try not to mess up your makeup.” spencer sat back down and picked up his book once more. you figured he wouldn’t move from there.

you slipped back into the bedroom to get changed into your bonnie outfit for the night. your makeup wouldn’t take much longer after that, it was a lot easier to do sfx work on yourself then other people.

thirty minutes later, you were completely ready for the party that night. spencer, thankfully, didn’t rub his face in the time you were gone. “are you ready to go?”

spencer glanced back up again. “oh wow. you look incredible.”

you blushed at the compliment. “please, that’s all you.” he met you halfway, kissing you once more. “i’m glad you pushed me to do this.”

“i’m just happy you agreed,” you laughed. you two lingered for a moment after that, a few lazy kissed thrown in there before you actually had to go.

“now come on,” spencer ushered once he saw the time. “let’s go wreck some havoc.”

☆ ☆ ☆

tags - @kissessforharryyy @blakes-dictionxry @hurricanejjareau @ogmilkis @ssa-morgan @gublertoon @ah-blossom @emilyslefteyebrow @holding-on-to-my-youth

[heyitsyn]

'Siri Am I Having a Stroke?’ Sofia the First

Soulmate!Daichi x Reader Soulmate!Tendou x Reader

a/n: lmao, yall finna know what kind of soulmate au this

when your soulmate gets hurt, you kinda get hurt too

the music your soulmate listens to or constantly sings is always playing in your head

request:  Can I request a daichi, tendou, and aone soulmate au headcanon 🤲🏽😩 they're my faves, I wanted to add some more but there could be a limit? I'll request again next time ^^

a/n: sorry anon but ill only do daichi and tendou bc im not very familiar with aone :( but theres not really a limit so go ahead!!

requests open!!

so anyways

for most of your life, you thought you didnt even have a soulmate

there were no scars, no bruises,

nothing

this other half of yours was completely silent and you really thought that youd die forever

but, you

you were a wild chile and you were the type to go playing outside w your brothers and get a lot of cuts

maybe that was why you thought you didnt have a soulmate bc when your soulmate does get hurt, you wouldnt see it since youd think it was one of your own

now, daichi

he worried for you

new scars and bruises would appear on his arms overnight and he fussed over the fact that you would constantly getting hurt

were you in a toxic environment?

were these intentional?

but he would try and heal them, thinking that it would heal you too bc he didnt want you to be hurt

uwu daichi luv

he would even kiss them better bc his mom told him that kisses help them heal faster

then,

during middle school, daichi found his love for volleyball

he started training and being more active and that caused him a lot of bruises and pain

meanwhile w you,

youve mellowed out a bit

so when you entered middle school,

you were actually ecstatic to find that you had a soulmate bc you would find bruises on your hands and arms

you found out the afternoon of the first day of middle school

daichi was in the gym, practicing during lunch, and he hit a spike that bruised his fingers and he received a really powerful ball

you were sitting in class, completely bored out of your mind so you just doodled on your paper

then you flinched at the sudden pain and saw the formation of the beautiful mix of blue, purple,green, bruise

yall are in different schools btw

you shrieked and stood up, cutting off your teacher and surprising everyone in the room

‘my soulmate!’

they were like, ‘okay and?’

the entire day, you admired the colors, not even minding the hurt bc this was it!!

!!!!

your soulmate was real!!!

but daichi was worried that you were also going through the same pain and soreness from practice

and you were

after the shock and happiness of knowing you in fact do have a soulmate,

youve started getting annoyed

was this what he felt whenever you injured yourself during your younger years?

bc this waas annoying

you were constantly fatigued, tired, sore

even the mere action of getting up in the morning sucked and you actually fell down the stairs due to the soreness of your legs and you dropped your chopsticks due to the hurt in your fingers

youve concluded that your soulmate was either an athlete or in a toxic environment

during the walk to school, you raised your arms and watched a new bruise forming

it was a truly beautiful sight but the stiffness and hurt weighed it down

this was your only form of communication with your soulmate and you were sad bc you wanted to be there for him and help heal his bruises and scars

one of your friends suggested a crazy thought of hurting yourself to write a small message which you instantly turned down bc thats too crazy and you will not do that

as the years went on, you were starting to get more worried each day that you wont be meeting your soulmate soon

for almost 6 years, youve wandered over to every athletic club in your school or nearby schools to find if there was even a person who had the same bruises as you

ngl, some lied just bc they wanted you as their soulmate uwu

one of your classmates in seijoh, iwaizumi hajime, has understood your dilemma since he was one of the ones youve expressed this concern to

youve been classmates for 3 years and youve always been coincidentally sat next to each other so youre close

i really cant resist my mans

‘y/n, i really think your soulmate is a volleyball player’

you rolled your eyes as you continued taking out your bento

‘iwa, ive checked your team, multiple times, and none of them are my soulmate! ive even checked other schools too since my brothers have connections there. but still nothing’

he felt bad for you, truly

he already found his when yall started high school, almost immediately, and you were so jealous

‘but those bruises on your arm can only be from volleyball. the way its placed, its like receiving an intense ball while the fingers might be because he spikes the ball’

you sighed before leaning your chin on your hand

‘okay, great buddha iwa-chan. enlighten me as to why you think so’

his eye twitched at the ridiculous nickname

‘y/n, im a volleyball player. ive been playing since i was like 6 and im the ace. i have those same exact bruises’

‘WHAT! IWA-CHAN ARE YOU MY SOULMATE?!’

‘YOU IDIOT I ALREADY HAVE MINE!’

but you mulled it over for a few days

yea, it would make sense, right?

but it still doesnt add up that youve literally visited every single club around with the help of being iwa’s friend and going to their matches

however,

due to karasuno not having practice matches w seijoh or not advancing far enough to play against them, youve never really interacted with that team

besides, the times they actually played against each other, youve been busy due to having to do interships, part time jobs, and studying since it was your last year of high school

it was during the second interhigh that iwa finally got you to go watch them play

‘come on, y/n. shittykawa misses you and matsun and maki keep demanding your support’

‘iwa, what-’

so you found yourself at the stands, just watching the games until seijoh actually plays

then you saw the team, known as karasuno, enter the gym to start their warm-ups

your heart started beating really fast and you were kinda freaking out bc what was happening

‘siri am i having a stroke?’

daichi was feeling the same thing

he thought it was just the adrenaline of playing a game but in all of his years of play8ing volleyball, he hasnt felt this intense beating of his heart

he even had to lean on suga for support bc it felt like his heart was going to jump out of his chest

‘daichi, you okay?’

suga worriedly asked and placed a hand on his forehead to check his temp

daisuga rights yall

he didnt want to worry the team so he nodded, just waving it off

he was captain so he shouldnt worry the others

oikawa and iwa entered the stands and were confused as to why you were looking around with wide eyes like an owl

fukurodani vibes

‘y/n-chan, what’s wrong?’

oikawa asked and you looked at them, surprised and shocked

they were lowkey freaked out bc what was happening

‘oikawa-san, my heart-’

you mumbled and pointed to your chest

his smile wobbled bc you just started at him and it was starting to scare him a bit

since oikawa hasnt found his soulmate yet, he wasnt familiar with the feeling of being in the same vicinity as his other half

but iwa did

and he was smiling

‘you owe me so much, y/n’

‘IWA! I FEEL LIKE IM GOING TO DIE!’

karasuno was going against johzenji and daichi wasnt exactly in his best game

to others, he looked like he was doing great but he wasnt feeling good and the beat of his heart was still very fast

this distraction caused him and tanaka to collide and everything went to hell

the entire time, your arms were crying and you were just sweating from the pain but you were also sweating w the possibility of your soulmate being either in johzenji or karasuno

but that was answered when daichi got hurt and you just collapsed, also falling unconscious

iwa, who returned from getting drinks, ran to your slumped form and oikawa, who was focused on the match and didnt notice, shrieked at your unconscious form

‘y/n? y/n, wake up’

everyone in the stands stared at your unconscious form and they started talking, eventually catching the attention of the karasuno team

suga, who was fussing over daichi, heard that a girl also fell unconscious

omg what if

oikawa was grinning at the sight of your bruised cheek bc you finally found your soulmate so you would shut up about it

iwa carried you to the nurse and you actually woke up as he placed you on the bed, conviently beside the karasuno captain

‘w-what-’

but he only smiled

‘congratulations, y/n’

bih what

congratulations for what

the nurse went over from beside daichi and she giggled at the meeting of soulmates

you sat up, wincing at the pain in your tooth

‘ow’

that caught daichi’s attention and he stared at you and your arms before looking at his

they were the exact same

‘i think,,,, i think we’re soulmates’

that made you quickly look at him and noticed the big bruise on his face that was like copy paste on you

‘oh god!’

you cowered and had your hands over your mouth in surprise

he froze, starting to feel insecure that he wasnt what you wanted

‘is something wrong-’

‘you’re HOT!!’

you shrieked unconsciously and when you finally realized it, you hurriedly pulled the blanket over your form

lmao gurl noooooo

daichi started laughing and he thought you were cute

straightforward

but cute

‘oi, come on. i want to see your pretty face’

yes police officer. this is the man who stole my uwus

you peaked your head out from your blanket cocoon and he smiled softly

‘i’m sawamura daichi, by the way. 3rd year’

‘l-l/n y/n. same y-year’

‘so? you expected me to be this?’

you shook your head

‘i mean, iwa told me you could be a volleyball player. but i didnt expect the universe to like me enough to give me a greek god as my soulmate’

im disowning y/n yall

he turned flustered and looked away to hide his blush

‘youre not too bad yourself, you know. youre actually more beautiful than i thought’

‘sir! dont say that to me i be catching feelings way too fast for that!’

i-i cannot w you

he laughed out loud before wincing, causing you to wince too

‘but are you okay, though? i mean,, it must hurt’

but you shook your head

‘i should be asking you that. does it hurt as much as it looks?’

‘nah, its bearable’

you continued talking about your childhood and you actually clarified that you were just rambunctious when you were younger so you got hurt pretty often

‘i really thought you needed to be saved or something’

you smirked

‘oh? my prince charming? knight-in-shining-armor? knight prince daichi?’

he stared at you, a blush creeping up again

‘are you always this bold?’

you shrugged

‘meh. im friends w oikawa tooru’

‘oh. makes sense’

lmao

you both completely forgot about the fact that his face literally got hurt and his tooth was gone bc you have been talking like two best friends who got separated

but you had to separate at some point too

the beautiful manager entered the clinic and asked if daichi was okay enough

‘yea, im fine. i can go now, i guess’

you nodded sadly

‘okay. bye, daichi’

he furrowed his eyebrows

‘but wait for me later, okay? ill treat you to something after i win this match’

from your bed, you crossed your arm with a smug smile

‘oh? youre confident, captain’

‘of course. ill win bc this victory is for you’

you bashfully smiled and chuckled

‘go hurry and win! i expect that date as soon as possible, captain!’

the deadchi memes are literally scaring the new fans and i feel really bad

bruh hes so cute for what

for his entire life, he had the sofia the first song stuck in his head

it was maybe bc his soulmate was in love w that show or just in love w the song

but either way, he constantly hears it and thinks about it

meanwhile you,

you constantly heard bye bye bye by nsync

of all things, it had to be a boy band

however, you were lucky bc for years it varied on what song would be playing

but for him, it continued to be sofia the first

this drived him to watch the show and he did see the appeal and soon, he started singing it too

omg its such a bop

you were triggered bc the song then switched over to sofia the first and you were like, ‘does he like it too?’

you would be going around the store, holding your mom’s hand, and singing it out loud, hoping to find your soulmate

but he never seemed to hear it

instead, hearing the song in your voice, instead of the show’s

he thought you had such a beautiful voice

then in elementary school, his bullying started and ngl, he was actually hurt by the words other kids said

he still had his cute smile on and acted like it didnt bother by teasing others but he was still sad

did nobody like him?

was he always going to look like a monster?

would you be revolted if you saw him?

then he heard this song in the radio ‘dear insecurity’ and he just couldnt help but keep listening to it

ofc you noticed and you were sad that he was listening to such sad song

he was insecure and you couldnt do anything about it

then you started looking up motivating songs and you started singing the one that you really liked

‘i see your monsters, i see your pain, tell me your problems, i’ll chase them away’

he heard your voice as he was hiding behind the school building and his tears instantly stopped, hearing a different song but he couldnt help but smile

he knew that song was for him

you were out there somewhere and a complete stranger to him but you were the only person who seemed to care

because under that teasing and cheerful personality, he was still human and he was very insecure about himself

but you were always there to encourage him, your voice instantly chasing all the fears away

when he started playing volleyball, he became famous for his efficient blocks and you could hear him singing different songs, all of them just under a minute

you concluded that they were his own songs

sometimes, you laughed bc they were funny songs and catchy so you would memorize it and sing it back to him

this was your only way of communicating back of forth and you were so lucky that you even got to hear your soulmate’s voice

then high school started, meaning your friends started meeting their soulmates one by one until you were the only one who didnt

your school, karasuno, had no one that had the same voice as your soulmate’s

some people even saw you as an extrovert and a people person since you started conversations with strangers easily but this was just your way of finding your other half

with no luck, you started singing your concerns

in no time, ‘thousand miles’ was playing on loop in tendou’s head and he was already feeling your antsy attitude

in retaliation, he starts singing ‘lucky’ by jason mraz and you always turned red, slightly happy that he was practically calling out to you

so even though you suffered through years being alone, you didnt give up on hope and continued your search

now, youd be asking, ‘why cant you or tendou just sing each other’s location?’

yes, young grasshopper, there is an explanation to that

you and tendou collectively agreed to let fate do its work and just wait for the time it happens bc if its meant to be, its meant to be

besides, tendou likes to tease you and he wants to make you wait for him so that the moment you do meet, it would become more special

in your last year of high school, you ended up helping kiyoko in being manager and you were so proud of these boys for making it to the finals

you were excitedly waving an orange flag in support of your team and you screamed with the others as they entered the court

you and yacchi ended up helping tanaka’s sister, saeko, and was setting up the plan for their cheers so you werent exactly focused on your soulmate

but tendou did keep hearing a fight song in your head

then they walked in

shiratorizawa made their presence known and you turned to look at them but locked eyes at the unique looking player

his red hair glinted against the bright lights of the gym and his smirk curled in such an attractive way that you were leaning forward to get a closer look

tendou noticed a stare at him and he saw your surprised yet flustered look

that eye contact made everything fall deaf in your ears and you just heard silence

no song, no cheer, just absolute silence

but you and tendou are practically the same so you thought for the worse that your soulmate has died bc of the silence

dread filled your stomach and you started singing sofia the first in instinct

your mouth moved with the words and you shut your eyes, trying to calm yourself down

his jaw dropped, hearing the familiar voice and song that correlated with your mouth’s movements

‘there you are, little birdie’

semi turned to tendou and saw him with a smile hes never seen before

it was so soft and genuine that he got a little scared

the entire game, you were all depressed bc it continued to be silent in your head

tendou was just teasing you a little bit and he didnt want to think or sing a song bc he wanted it to be a special cliche reunion after he crushes your team

but his famous song ruined it

it blared in your head and it got 2x bass boosted when he sang it out loud, completely disregarding the fact that everyone was listening

‘you!’

you shrieked and pointed to him

he was your soulmate

and he was alive

not dead

everyone, including all players, looked at confusion between you and him but he just waved at you

‘ill talk to you later, little birdie!’

great, he embarrassed you in front of everyone

but you didnt care bc omg he was your soulmate!!

‘omg universe and fate, you actually like me to give me such a handsome soulmate!’

now, youre actually cheering on both teams

one was your home school the other was your soulmate

however,

there could only be one winner

and that winner was karasuno

you noticed the defeated looks of your soulmate and his teammates and you almost bursted into tears

you quickly maneuvered yourself through the people and found the familiar spiky hair standing at the doorway, looking at the gym with a forlorn expression

the others noticed you there, especially ushijima who gave you a nod and a small smile

‘i trust you’ll take care of him’

you nodded shakily, raising a hand in salute

‘y-yes!’

you approached him and his teary eyes almost made you bolt into his arms but you calmed yourself

instead, you didnt say anything

but you did sing

‘come stop your crying, it will be alright. just take my hand, and hold it tight. i will protect you, from all around you. i will be here, dont you cry.’

tendou looked to his side and saw you there, not looking at him but also looking at the same direction he was previously

‘my name is tendou satori’

despite already hearing his voice, you still turned red and you looked at him, warmth and love present in your eyes

‘and i’m l/n y/n’

‘you have a beautiful voice’

‘and you are beautiful’

that ending for shiratorizawa physically and emotionally and mentally broke me