#it matters in my heart lol
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It only took me since launch to accomplish, but there was finally enough of a lull right before Chapter 12 that I did it, I got every operator I have to 200% trust !
#it's not like this matters for gameplaybor anything but#it matters in my heart lol#more than anything I just started trying to get everyone there on a whim a few years ago#so it's very satisfying to have finally acheived it#and now I can pull for Ines and mess it up lol but I took a screenshot first so that's what matters haha#also please forgive my 112 notifications it's mainly modules and op recs I'm slowly reading through#this is one of my proudest achievments in Arknights though ✌️
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#Xion#kingdom hearts#my art#here she is. not 100%happy with it but I'm content enough#I did something and that's all that matters lol#hope you guys like it.
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#Baldur's Gate 3#BG3 spoilers#Astarion#bg3edit#vgedit#gamingedit#`23#`bg3#gifbox`bg3#aesfocus#in the first act his inexperience with freedom made him reckless with attempting power-grabs#like all over the place no matter the cost#for him to caution with his full loving heart on ascension using the fuckoff worm... floored#'I want you to stay you'? right back at you dear#*this is from my beginning Act 3 everyone. by the way. lol
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Sometimes I'm doing well, and then other times Lucifer's level 30 intimacy phone call in Nightbringer suddenly comes back to mind, and I am once again reminded how Lucifer is so utterly desperate to connect with Satan in any way. It doesn't even have to be meaningful; just having his brother despise him a tiny bit less than before would already be more than enough
And when they finally do make the tiniest, most insignficant amount of progress imaginable, Lucifer is so overjoyed about it that he ends up celebrating with a horn of Demonus......or two, maybe three... Might as well finish the bottle. Let's open another one! And another, and another, and another! We've got to celebrate tonight, after all! Hm? No, he isn't drunk MC, what a stupid question to even ask. Here, he'll drink some more just to prove it! Then after that--!
And all that because he and Satan managed to hold a conversation for a minute longer than usual
#hey so i originally got the levels mixed up. whoops#anyway#had to stop everything for an hour or two and just lie there thinking about satan & luci again#there's so much i want to talk about when it comes to the two of them bc their relationship is so fascinating#but most of the time when i try to write smth down it just comes out as “hnnngghhhh these two.....they're making me go insannnee” lol#also luci admitting in his lv25 call that satan is the only one he has problems with and that no matter what he tries nothing seems to work#broke my heart fr </3#obey me#obey me nightbringer#obey me lucifer#obey me satan#;mel's analyses
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Agatha and Rio as star-crossed lovers: Why a happy ending for them is unlikely (for now) but it'll be okay (probably?)
Look, I’m obsessed with these two—both their complex characters, their crazy unique dynamic—it’s a ship I actually can’t play favourites with!
BUT I also fully expect these two will fight it out in the finale and they aren’t headed for a happy ending, at least not a happy ending where they walk off happily into the sunset together at the end of this series and we shippers should maybe try to not freak out about it.
Let’s look at what the show is—in my opinion—telling us about these two. Under the cut for spoilers and my heap of meta thoughts–
Agatha’s arc is about her finding her coven, her community
I’ve written a bit more about the show’s and our protagonist's arc here: Basically underneath all that lust for power, Agatha’s deepest desire is to find a coven, a family of witches she can share her trials and blessings with. Agatha loves powerful witchcraft and she wants someone to share it with.
And she did find Rio. These two incredibly lonely women found each other, fell in love, and probably murdered their way through so many people together.
But then Agatha had a child and realised she could be a little bit less selfish for another human being. And then Rio took him away and they separated but i think they ultimately never dealt with what I think is at the heart of their rift now, of Agatha still having that bit of humanity and vulnerability for human connection in her.
Now of course at this point I don’t know what Rio’s deal is exactly. Is she human? Was she human? What happened in her past? What we do know is that Rio has a certain detachment from people, and that she enjoys watching Agatha kill witches.
Right now Agatha's getting a taste of what having a coven can be like. Something she's not had in centuries. Them working together, making magic together. That moment during the campfire where she realised they were laughing with her. The shared experience of riding those broomsticks.
Yes, covens—like any kind of family or community—can be good or bad. They can lift you up or tear you down. Agatha's first coven and mother failed her, we'll see how this one fares (especially after what we saw in episode 5). Will they be enough to bring out more of Agatha's humanity?
The thing is, Agatha is going on a bit of a character development journey and Rio—whose her world hasn't been rocked the same way Agatha's has—isn't.
Now I don't expect Agatha to turn over a new leaf by the end of the series but I expect her to be in a somewhat different place from where she started, and Rio I expect will not be in that same place. At least not by this series' end.
There is a certain tension at the end of episode 4 after Rio brings up the topic of "the boy". And again when Rio watches Agatha leave the cabin in episode 5. I think Rio is recognising that this isn't the Agatha she knew and first fell in love with many years ago, and she's not happy about it.
Agatha's moving in a direction Rio might not be able to follow, and I expect that's where we'll get our conflict down the road.
In a world without logistical limits, it's not impossible for these two to be together given enough time and character development (and hey that's what fic is for) but with 4 episodes remaining I expect we'll at best get more of a bittersweet resolution for them, after both of them finally let loose the anger they have at each other.
A closing of a chapter, I suppose, but not necessarily The End.
Agatha and Rio love each other, but they also bring out the worst in each other
It’s clear that these two have loved and do still have love for each other. That they found a special connection with each other that has maybe even saved one or the both of them before.
But they can also be standing in each other's way.
I'm reminded of these lines from Killing Eve:
I think my monster encourages your monster, right? I think I wanted it too.
Look, Agatha can't have a community if she keeps killing members of that community in the pursuit of power. Yes, with Rio around, it's terribly romantic: the two of them against the world. But what if Agatha actually wants to be a part of that world, even a little?
And as for Rio, now this is just my theory but it's possible Rio is perhaps too focused on the darker aspects of her role, of her power.
As The Green Witch, isn’t she meant to be more than Death?
I've been marvelling at all the details in Rio's nature-themed warrior witch outfit. It's beautiful, a celebration of life. She clearly has a strong connection with plants; there's a cute spider on her jacket; she's shown some ability to heal. Even her Death outfit has vines and roots forming her chest piece — what happened with Rio to make her hone in on spreading violence and death?
It just feels like there's a story there, to have her be The Green Witch as opposed to a more traditional or mainstream manifestation of a Death entity.
It's clear that these two came together and did monstrous things. There's usually reasons for that. Human or not, I suspect Rio has her own pain, one that's warping the balance of nature. Maybe they both need to heal in their own way, apart from each other.
This relationship is important to the show
Whatever happens, it's clear that this relationship is key to Agatha's story and the show. Their relationship, with its soft moments and sharp edges, filled much of the first episode on purpose and I expect it to play a major part in the finale as well – an appropriate bookend – including the fight between them.
You could even say that it's actually a good thing that these two are getting the focus at the show's start and end. It's always been Agatha and Rio: understanding each other, at each other's throats, pushing each other, tearing at each other, wanting but not meeting each other.
The thing about this being a "small stakes" show is that the cause of the fight happening between them can be very personal. A lovers' quarrel. Rio may simply want to kill Agatha for something she did, or in rage or fear of losing her.
On that note though, these two have such a long and complicated – and as Hahn once put it "toxic maybe but loving" – relationship that one big violent messy fight in itself doesn't worry me. I mean, we've all seen episode one.
Maybe sometimes you have to bleed to let the poison out.
This is still a love story.
#agatha all along#agathario#agatha x rio#agatha harkness#rio vidal#tv: agatha all along#ship: vidarkness#aaa meta#ooooookay i'm getting this out now before any future ep steamrolls my theories lol#i know the heart wants what the heart wants#and we won't be normal about this#but look at the story that we're getting#star-crossed lovers is this romantic term but do you know what it means#it's tragic#Plaza actually gave this interesting quote in the show's production brief#about how Agatha and Rio know each other so well#but they also know that fate is bigger than them#and that destiny must happen#no matter what they want#that's it#they're star-crossed lovers
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ChenRcj August 22nd will be a day I'll always remember
#the heart killers#the heart killers cast#the heart killers bts#joong archen#dunk natachai#joongdunk#fadelstyle#joong's tweet had me go 👀👀👀#like is it related to thk? most likely especially since dunk replied lol#but i wouldn't be surprised if it 's not and joong was just being joong by tweeting this lol#(no one had posted the jd and the dunk pic in one post yet so i had to take matters into my own hands lol)
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hello sel!!! hru doing??
The ask game is super fun! How about Gojo + vindictive.
I hope u hv had a lovely day 🫶
zuro anon
zuro anon hello!! thanks for sending in a prompt!! i'm doing good 🥺 spending this lil vacay at home, mostly 🥺 and happy to be back writing 🥺 i hope you have the loveliest weekend 💗
contains: non-canon, childhood enemies to lovers (ish), (modern) arranged marriage, reader wears a braid and dresses
gojo + vindictive
you hate gojo satoru. you have ever since you were 5.
he's a bully―a real cocky one at that, with no regard or remorse for how his actions affect those around him.
on the day before your 6th birthday, right as your parents gathered together for the annual countdown, he gobbled up the entire plate of your favorite milk cakes before you could even take a bite. this marked the start, the beginning of a vengeance stewing inside of you.
at the age of 8, when you first learned how to do your own braids, he would tug at them, pull them free and unravel all your hard work for the past hour. you used to chase him for it, yell "satoru!" with all the strength your little lungs could muster and he would merely laugh and run faster.
the name "satoru," you've learned, must be synonymous with "sabotage," because it's all he's ever done. he threw the flower geto suguru handpicked for you straight to the ground, and purposely splashed gutter water all over the white dress you intended to wear on your first date.
not to mention, he's always rubbed in the fact that he's better than you, at everything―dangled all his accomplishments in front of you as if he knew they were just centimeters out of reach.
gojo satoru is solely responsible for tainting your childhood memories a miserable cerulean blue.
so, when your parents sit you down one day and tell you that you'll have to marry him, you feel transported in that moment, to each and every instance gojo has ever wronged you. it flips through your mind like a montage of flashbacks in a movie.
it's both surprising and not. your families have always been partners, in everything―business, education, and now you guess, life as well. you hate gojo's guts but this creates an opportunity you don't think can result from anything else.
so, sure, you'll agree to the marriage―only to make his life a living hell.
"hello, fiancée," he greets you, for the first time since the agreement.
you don't do anything to hide your disgust, face scrunching up as you spit out, "shut up, satoru."
the wedding planning is horrendous―at least, you hope it is for him. you pick out every single cake flavor you know he hates and choose the brightest venue possible for the event. the lights you pick for the afterparty are strobe lights, and you make sure to do multiple test runs just to play with his eyes. it doesn't occur to you that the solution to his light sensitivity is simple: just a plain pair of shades.
you wear plumping lip gloss on your wedding day, just so his lips burn when you have to kiss him. but gojo is either extremely numb or just good at faking it, because all he does is grin as he whispers quietly before parting, "spicy."
in preparation for your married life, you create a ledger of some sort―a book of accounts housing every single thing gojo has done wrong. you write down your plans to get him back for each of them, a list of pranks and inconveniences to make him regret ever messing with you all those years ago.
at half a year of marriage and 25 years of knowing each other, he casually tells you the big "i love you," but you're sure he doesn't mean it. you tell yourself your heart is racing from how infuriating his existence is; at how stupid his face looked when he'd said it. not anything else and most especially not the little dimple on his cheek that shows itself every now and then.
(you didn't know it yet then, but he'd found the ledger you kept and read through it all. the one-year plan, the three-year plan, the five, and so on. and it does nothing but strengthen how he feels about you, since he was 6, 14, and a few years ago at 24.
it's at your third year of marriage that you find out―how gojo's known all this time, but more importantly, how there were reasons behind every single instance you thought he was out to ruin your life.
with intelligence far beyond his age, gojo has always preferred the company of adults more than children. at age 6, he would listen in on conversations his mother had with her friends, roughly comprehending complex worlds with the simple ones he understood. someone had mentioned something about their daughter being allergic to milk. and so, when your birthday came up and all he saw were milk treats, he gobbled them all up in an effort to make sure you wouldn't be subjected to an adverse reaction―even though you were far off from any dairy allergy.
what he was sure of, however, was that you were severely allergic to bees. and when he spotted one perched right on the buttercup stem geto handed you, he had no choice but to smack it right out of your hand and down to the ground, stepping on it too, for good measure.
and, okay, maybe he was a little naughty for tugging at your braids when you'd just spent all that time doing them, but he always liked how they flowed into waves when they unravelled; how you'd chase him afterwards, angry but so, so pretty.
if there's one moment gojo will consider real sabotage, though, it's that date he stopped you from going to. like there was any way he was going to let another man see you dressed like that. he isn't nice that way. when gojo wants something, he's not sharing, and the sight of you in white―that was meant to be his and only his.)
#gojo x reader#jjk x reader#shotorus.workbook#this was interesting!!! bc i dont necessarily see gojo to be vindictive (hella petty yes HABSFh but not vindictive)#so trying to somehow incorporate the prompt really stretched out my braincells#thank you for this zuro anon!!#i hope you like it!!#additional context stuff!! they both come from affluent families and gojo is a little insane when it comes to love#not normal at all LOL he gets off from reader's hatred hsbfhsgdfv#reader learns to love him eventually. its rlly just a matter of seeing everything differently and understanding the whole situation#why he did things the way he did etc etc#not written but gojo hasbeen a kind of constant in reader's life and has been there at their lowest too !!!#and he really does go out of his way to make things work for reader too just not in ways obvious to reader !#for one of their classes in uni gojo got a really high grade compared to everyone else so chances of a curve were slim#reader's grade wasn't really that high and they were really sad about it#so gojo did a bunch of extra work for the professor so that he would agree to curve everyone's grades higher LOL#things like that ! he also trashed the front yard of the first boy that broke reader's heart 😄😄😄😄#nonie.zuro#ask#rep#ask game answered
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Chosen
Much shorter than it has any right to be, given how long it's taken me to actually finish. Plot? Uh, no, not really. But anyhow... She's been away. He's been unwell.
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He looks at her like she’s the most welcome hallucination he’s ever had.
Kia closes the door slowly behind her as she takes in this chaos of a makeshift apothecary, the loungeroom in an utter state of disarray and her beloved not faring much better, red-nosed and unshaven and dressed in a black silken pyjama and robe ensemble which, while inarguably stylish, was very definitely not his usual late afternoon wear.
And not at all what she had been expecting to come home to.
A miscellany of potions and concoctions and gods-know-what-elses lie scattered across the coffee table. A teacup, mostly empty. Two tissue boxes, one apparently even emptier than the teacup. Some sort of book...no, manual. Looks instructional. A wilderness of failed curatives.
Oh my god.
She walks further into the room. The air smells of menthol and embers.
“Babe, what are… Are you… What have you even been doing h…?”
You absolute beautiful total disaster.
“Trying not to… hh-HH …let thi…this-damn-cold…” Cerberus turns from her as his sentence dissolves, the syllables collapsing against one another in a desperate rush to give way to greater need and deep breath of purpose, and he raises a finger in urgent, undeniable pause. "Huh-TSSCH-uu!" Hurriedly claiming a series of tissues in a brief, expectant hiatus, he surrenders completely and sneezes again. "Hh-AATSCHH-uu! *snff-FF!*" A quiet groan in the aftermath. He excuses himself, adds another tissue to the set, blows his nose and immolates the lot. "Pardon me." He sighs. "Trying not to let this godsdamned cold win,” he manages, with an accompanying sharp sniffle. Neither heavy congestion nor the way his voice cracks slightly lessens any of the seething distaste in his tone.
“Oh, honey.” Kia brushes some errant hair back from his face. :Bless you.: She touches a tender kiss to his temple. “You’re getting your ass kicked.”
She offers him a soft smile to hopefully lessen a little bit of truth's sting. "C'mon, shift over," she says gently as she joins her beloved on the couch, nestling up beside him, resolutely ignoring every caution he tries to give her advising against doing so. Notably half-hearted as those cautions are.
Because while it’s true that he very much doesn’t want her to catch this, he’s also well aware it’s more than likely already too late for such concerns. The entire house is probably some sort of incubation epicentre. And, sincerity of expressed warnings aside, the entire sorry vista surely constitutes warning enough. He's fairly certain he couldn't look more biohazardous if he tried.
Cerberus sighs again, sniffling again immediately afterwards, and gives his bonded a look of resignation.
Further elaboration hardly seems necessary.
But also he doesn’t press the issue because in truth the last thing he wants is to send her away. He’s not even sure he has the energy to insist on it, anyway; he’d be infuriated about this entire ridiculous circumstance if he wasn’t so damn exhausted. So, small obligatory protests done, with another damp sniffle Cerberus shifts some disarrayed blanketry out of the way and wraps an arm around Kia’s waist, drawing her close.
Her soft perfume of violet, strawberry and vanilla is lost on him anywhere outside of memory right now, but her presence is more than enough and he closes his eyes for a moment, just appreciating the simple fact of her being here beside him at last; he's missed her immensely, constantly.
“You know, you could’ve just asked me to come back, if you wanted me here,” Kia muses as she nestles further into his heat, adding, “It wouldn't have been a big deal,” without accusation. She leans her head against his shoulder and looks up at him with gentle azure gaze, her unspoken thoughts of I’d always choose you. How do you still not know that? readable despite her not voicing them.
And he does, of course, know that – in fact, it’s the very reason he wouldn’t ask. Cerberus sniffles thickly, wiping his nose. “Ah, love. I'd hardly ask you to put yourself anywhere near this—" He gestures around the room in a general presentation of contempt for the whole situation. "—vortex of infectious absurdity,” he concludes, thick congestion lacing his words. He clears his throat but it doesn’t make any notable impact against the wreckery his voice has become. "And it's about your... *SNFF!* ...your autodoby."
Kia peers at him. “My…what?”
“Your au…” Cerberus, all too aware that several critical consonants are unequivocally not working for him, rolls his eyes at himself. Honestly. Taking another fresh succession of tissues from a very rapidly depleting supply, he blows his nose forcefully but completely ineffectively.
He excuses himself once more and tries again; it goes equally badly.
Kia, baffled, raises her hands in a friendly but very clear nope sorry babe no idea expression, accompanied by a gentle little laugh that she just can’t help.
A long-suffering and immensely frustrated look comes her way, followed by a resigned, defeated sigh as her beloved entirely gives up. “Free will.”
For a moment, this makes even less sense to Kia. “Why would…” she begins, but cuts herself off in triumphant realisation. “Oh, autonomy!” She laughs. "Oh, sweetheart."
“That’s what I s… hh-hh! I...” And even this is hijacked, and the Demon king capitulates entirely, doubling over desperate into crooked elbow, “Huh-TSCHH-uu! Ah-HEHTSCHuu!”
He takes some moments of bleary recovery, Kia's heartrate spiking alongside the :Gods, forgive me: Cerberus Mindsends her.
"Oh, bless you, babe." Kia doesn't try to fight the thrill that flashes through her and she wraps herself around her bonded to kiss him again; a kiss deeper, more needful, than is probably wise. But wisdom isn't what she's craving right now.
“You know what? You’re going to stop talking and let me make my own choices.” She brushes a stray lock of hair from his eyes, touches the softest of lingering kisses to his forehead and meets his gaze. :Talking really isn't working out for you anyway.: "And besides—" Another kiss, deeper again, and she presses her arousal against his, salacious, wanton.
:—you know we both want the same thing.:
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#jeebus crispies it's been aeons#thank you so much to anyone who remembers who my darlings are lol#cerbia#cerberus#my writing#i have several other wips that are still 'ip' and i'm so annoyed at myself for being so slow about ALL OF THEM#it's ridiculous#oh if background lore matters to you: she's been away for a week and a half on important Caste-related duties#this fic is essentially a follow-up to my incognito piece 'and there will your heart be also'#but hopefully they also work as standalones#Aaaanyway#it's 1am in australia and i am going to post this and pass out#before i start second-guessing myself any more lol#anyway thank you SO much for reading and i'll try to take under six months to post again next time ffs 💞💞
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"…what are you staring at?" out comes the muffled question, soft and warm, like the half-eaten sesame ball lightly squished between their fingers. golden eyes flicker down for just a second at the treat, reminding him of their cheeks earlier when they were stuffed full as they chowed down on fried rice. his smile stretches wider. it's that same, lovely grin that never fails to make their heart flutter. "you," (adorable you), "of course. what, i can't lovingly stare at and appreciate my cute, cute partner?" a wobbly smile is followed by a puff of breath and the bloom of red on their cheeks. "whatever…" his grin stays.
#haikyuu!!#haikyuu#bokuto koutarou#mblue art#implied canon x reader/oc / self ship#— pov fast food date w bokuto but he's got the heart-eyes at me absolutely obliterating these sesame balls (/hj LOL)#sesame balls from chwkng ily (the squishy mochi texture and the crunchy sesame layer outside WOOF yum esp if its WARM!!)#made my lunch purchase worth it by savoring the food and getting delulu and even making art from it hell yeag#do the nice things that make u happy guyse itll make u feel better no matter how cring u think it is as long as ur not harming anyone<3#making art and writing things for urself is pretty pog
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It's still scaly since it's only a week old but I couldn't hold off posting it anymore - here's my Riku tattoo!!!!
Reference under the cut - it's that manga panel, of course :-)
I made an edit to remove the text boxes and the rain and sent it to my artist, and she made a few more changes like giving him a fully defined mouth!
#EVERYONE. GET YOUR FAV CHARACTER TATTOOED ON YOUR BODY. ITS GREAT#ALSO BONUS POINTS IF ITS SOMEWHAT SHIP RELATED. YEAH. YEAH.#kingdom hearts#riku kingdom hearts#soriku#I COUNT THIS AS SORIKU GIVEN WHAT RIKU IS DOING IN CONTEXT#kingdom hearts tattoo#kingdom hearts fanart#kingdom hearts manga#kh 358/2 days#kingdom hearts 358/2 days#358/2 days#kh#AAAA. i am. AAAAAAAAAA#the lines are straight my arm just isnt lol#i just thought the rain wouldnt read well without context of the scene ahaha. just felt it looked weird isolated.#i feel like no one will see this BUT I WILL SEE THIS EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE AND THATS WHAT MATTERS#my artist did such a good job im like blown away by how clean the lines are - everywhere that looks like its wobbly or#is going outside the lines is just my skin flaking. like it looks so good. Ill take another picture when its actually healed im sorry#i have never known patience
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I also can't stop thinking about buck on that date. his awkwardness and his desperate attempt to act normal while freaking out. his panic at eddie finding out. his slightly hunched posture. the way he doesn't know what to do with his hands. he is so precious, he's everything to me and more than anything all I want is to watch him come into himself and gain the confidence to take up space as the beautiful bisexual man he is
#hes gonna hurt my heart BAD lol#but seeing his development by the end of the season#no matter his relationship status#is going to be such a gift#911 spoilers
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some more telesphore :3
#the kingmaker histories#telesphore winterlich#my art#tel-only doodle dump partially cuz i love him dearly and he's fun to draw and i needed the practice drawing his handsome face ^^#and partially cuz depending on how you count it he's got like 5-7 fewer fanarts (on tumblr) than eisen/colette...#which is so so criminal eviltwisted and makes me so sad. so i took matters into my own hands :3#(though it'd be a fool's errand trying to keep the numbers even permanently LMAO. i also just wanted to draw a bunch of telsies)#(so i might probly fuck up the ratios later by doing this for eisen+colette lol...#i wanna get more consistent/comfortable drawing them all)#with this i have now posted (way) more telsie fanart than every other fanartist combined (excluding meg tuten's art ofc). yippee yippee#(it's not a competition) (but i am still keeping count) (i'm freak)#(but 'm not counting meg's cuz there's so much and i couldn't possibly find it all. plus i can't imagine how much is unposted)#(i just know there's Oodles and i love it all and that is enough for mee)#honestly this should've been hat practice as well but. i do not like drawing hats.#and i struggle with drawing the top of his head anyway so it's still useful practice lmao#if you asked me for my favorite character the answer would simultaneously be:#“i love all three of the protags so much!!! i couldn't possibly pick </3"#and “telesphore <3”#the margin? SO slim. i'm so very obsessed w/ all three of them#unimaginable fondness in my heart
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Pandora Hearts Month day 15: King
@i-prefer-the-term-antihero
#pandora hearts#phmonth23#ph#lacie baskerville#description in alt text#my art#i guess we're going mixed media#i was struggling sooo much with this one geez#i'm not using watercolor paper... or actual watercolors for that matter...#and my material was not cooperating#somehow this feels fitting for lacie lol#i love that she's a horrible sore loser#younger sister core
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you n me
#witch hat tag#orufrey#today was so wild emotionally... isnt it mad how no matter how depressed the world makes you feel you also do have to do Tasks etc. Lol!#then the pain of life makes you re-realise how epic a gay manga romance is after not thinking about it all day#idk whether i'm even 'depressed' because i can be this obsessed with something. i feel hopeless-not apathetic. my heart is fighting hard#qifrey in a keffiyeh was a charity sketch thing - oru i did before wants to be with him
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in my head, kieran survived the o’driscoll kidnapping, but by the time he’d got back to shady belle after someone found him bleeding out in the street and took him to the doctor, the gang was gone, and he took the opportunity to escape the gang lifestyle, running off to strawberry and beginning work with the timber folks
years later, you can find him at pronghorn ranch in epilogue 1, lovingly tending to the horses in the barn when you go to scoop the manure, and he’s made an honest living for himself. and the o’driscolls are gone because sadie killed then all and he is finally safe and happy is anyone listening can anyone hear me
#does anyone care where javier fits in here#in my little mind world they run off together but not at the same time#i want to write more about this but i have no idea where to start and this is all i can find the words for at the moment#if my brain can work for a little longer i may reblog w javi’s side of this au#it takes him a lot longer to actually buck up and run off but it happens literally right before the pinkertons come to beaver hollow#like he takes the opportunity during the height of the confusion when john renters camp to run off#because john is alive and dutch lied and he misses kieran so much and it’s just his last straw#his heart is broken and loyalty matters to him still more than anything but it isn’t dutch he’s loyal to anymore#i’m literally delusional#autism is a crazy thing cuz why am i literally making up an entire au and constantly thinking abt a ship that literally only 3 people in the#world ship#please put me down i wish i could have gotten hyperfixated on a Normal ship but noooo#it’s THIS ONE#someone please indulge me i have so may thinks and thots#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#kieran duffy#javieran#i won’t tag javi because. he’s literally not mentioned in the actual post LOL#text#hero's talking to himself again
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since social media is largely unusable right now (understandable) i figured i'd try to do some video editing but i'm once again faced with the issue of i just do not listen to music
#my heart eyes howell edit can't very well be set to an mcr song so what now.#sidenote i feel like my blog looks insane cause i was election posting and then just went back to dan and phil but like#i'm not really interested in playing the blame game everyone's on right now#and people are understandably very sensitive because this all majorly sucks on just about every level#so it's kind of like no matter what you say it will upset someone and it's extremely not constructive#so dan and phil escapism it is#plus being like Not American there's a limit to how much i can say before it's just obnoxious lol
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