#it feels weird trying to come up with these bc i cant remember off the top of my head if i already wrote them lmao

[toytulini]

lightly defending Toshiro while also fully understanding Laois frustrations. as a bitch who let teachers call me the wrong name all through high school cos it was kinda funny

[softhairedhotch]

DUDEEEE HELLO??:!:!::&: PLEASE I LOVE YOU, YOUR WONDERFUL BRAIN N UR RESPONSES???!! like sometimes i think damn my thoughts r sooooo filthy i wonder if anyone would even feel the same like am i crazy :-///.... THEN UR REPLIES JUST FUELS ME EVEN MORE ARGHRHHHHH LIKE??? im so glad we have the same brain like damn... i love talking abt him hehe rly.. thank u for entertaining my thoughts n making it even more amazing <333 also i hope u are feeling better now!!! 🫂🫂 tbh i feel the same bc the idea of aaron has made me feel better so many times n it's years since i started liking him :-(((( fr i never ever regret starting this show n falling in love w him 😭😭😭

"imagine just sitting there with him fully inside you, tie in your mouth, head on his broad shoulder, one of his big warm hands occasionally rubbing up and down your back as you hear the other write away" ‼️‼️‼️ PLEASEEEE omfg he'd feel so good and he'd make you feel sooooo safe 😭😭😭 i need this so badly . being on his lap would literally make all the painful noisy thoughts in your head go silent because all you can think about and feel is him <3333 though i don't know how i'd be able actually to be quiet n not be reduced into a whimpering mess because GODDDDDD HE'S JUST SOOOO..... my god. if u do turn this into a fic i'd probably be reading it 9784953 times n manifesting it to appear in my dreams 🙏🙏

and OOOOOFFFFFFFFF cannot decide if i would want him to make a mess all over me and use his thick fingers to scoop it up and shove it into my mouth or have him cum deep in my throat ! 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 like man.... the idea of messy wet sex drives me insane like having him a panting sweaty mess 🧎‍♂️🧎‍♂️ n downright filthy cum eating . like my thoughts abt it are ENDLESS n its literally a can of worms im afraid of opening-- AWOEKFJFKEKD thinking abt that episode when aaron jumps into a lake to chase an unsub n he comes out of the water all WET N THE WATER DRIPPING DOWN HIS SKIN??? I CANT REMEMBER WHAT EPISODE IT IS BUT I THINK U KNKW WHAT IM REFERRING TO???

omfggggg when he's ruthlessly riding you and jerking himself off, his chest would get soooo red and it'll feel soo nice to run your fingers down his body and literally worship every inch of him 😵‍💫 he'd look soooo pretty with little marks over his chest as you shower him with praises... thinking about praising aaron HEEEEHEHEH he'd get sooo shy n flustered the first few times but slowly he'd get used to it and literally bask in the attention n praises 😭😭

my god n i must say u rly perfected his voice n what he would say......i swear my love for aaron not only solidified my kink for suits but also... voice 😵‍💫😵‍💫🧎‍♂️🧎‍♂️🧎‍♂️ like it makes me think how he'd react the first time when he realised how much power he has over you just from his voice and words alone.... like first he'd be confused why your reaction sometimes gets a lil funny but then his expression darkens when finally he realises. but he likes building up material to tease you later on so he doesn't really point it out at first but just has an amused smile.

then imagine one night being on a phone call with him as he just talks about his day and that it's pretty late at night so his voice starts getting huskier bc he's tired.... and he's just rambling about something unrelated but you feel the heat crawling up your neck because he just sounds so good . you can't help but clench your thighs and swallow your saliva. then he asks you a question but you're SO distracted that you miss it and when you finally answer him, your voice shakes. he goes silent before breaking into a low laugh because he recognises that tone of voice and picks up your breathing. "oh my, baby... i don't even need to see your face to know what's up. here am i trying to tell you about my day... but you just can't help yourself, hm? ...pathetic."

YEAHHHHHH 😭😭😭😭

- 🤲

AHHHHHHHHHH SDJFHSJDF THANK YOU hehehehehe n YEAH I GETCHA, I BE THINKING "oh GOD what if what i say is too weird???" n then you get back to me with basically the SAME THING AHHHHH i'm sooo happy we be thinking the same thoughts LMAO. and thank you sm <33

YESSSSS HE'D MAKE YOU FEEL SO SAFE FR <333 i wanna sit on his lap soooo so so much, god it'd be so good. i would love to write it as a fic tbh but i just have sooooo much to work on already UGHHH why is writing so hard and time-consumingggggg

REALLLLL I WANT BOTH !!! n oPEN THAT CAN OF WORMS RN CUM EATING IS SOOOOOOOO HOT I SWEAR DDSKFSK AHHHHH AND YES YES YE S I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT SCENE YOU'RE REFERENCING

OUGHHH HE'S SO BEAUTIFUL FUCKKK

yessss he'd looook so pretty riding youuu <33 all red and sweaty and a whimpering panting mess oughhh i love it i love him sm n yessssss i wanna praise him sooo bad. like if you praised him he just WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO but then as he gets used to it, he loooooves it and craves it ough

hehe thank you!! N YEAH VOICE KINK AND SUIT KINK GO BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR 🤭🤭 he'd get sooooo cocky knowing he has sm control over you oughhh and he'd be so proud of himself knowing he can get you to do almost anything with just his voice n pretty face

STOPPPP I'VE HAD THE EXACT SAME IDEA AND STARTED IT AS A FIC ONCE BUT NEVER GOT AROUND TO IT KSDFJK i loooooooove the idea of calling him on a case and he's just like. tired but tryna talk n his voice is sooooo deep and gravelly and it sounds so hot (bc sleepy/morning voices might be one of the best things in existence <33) and he notices you trailing off your sentences and stuttering a bit and going quiet and he just KNOWS what he's doing to you and he teases you relentlessly <33 he'd either get you all hot and bothered n then tell you that you gotta be patient and wait til he gets home orrrrrr he'll go "do you think you can show me how much of an effect i have on you, sweetheart?" and when you send him a pic he'd hum in appreciation and tell you how pretty/handsome you are and how he's gonna make you feel real good when he gets home but for now he's gonna talk you through making yourself feel good <33 maybe you can hear him letting out cute lil moans as he tells you how he wants you to touch yourself and your stomach drops when you realise he's getting off on it too and you ask him to send a pic of himself and he does and he looks sooooo good <33

also i gotta ask,,, how do you feel about daddy kinks LMAOOO bc i haven't thought about it much relating to aaron lately tbh but when i first got into him two years ago, all i could think was him saying stuff like "let daddy make you feel good, hm?" or "you wanna touch daddy?" n stuff like that,, are you into that?? i'm leaning more toward softer aaron n bottom aaron lately but godddd soft daddy dom aaron is soooooooo <333

[bigassbowlingballhead]

so we all know that my dreams are weirdly hyper realistic and plot driven so buckle the fuck up.

number one: everything (like, the rules of reality) was the same as real life except i guess my bf didnt exist (sad but necessary for the plot i suppose). im at thanksgiving at my parents house, which is a weekend long affair. tzp and redacted are married and also there bc they are my friends i guess. im definitely better friends w taylor than redacted but redacted and i get along and like each other. okay. the scene is set.

so, im preparing dinner with my dad and aunts like usual. taylor and redacted have slept in but taylor comes out to help eventually. he is fresh from a shower and wearing a very tight shirt. we talk while i cook and it’s clear that i need to fuck this man like, yesterday. within the dream logic, this is not the first time ive fucked around with him — this is a thing that we do. go me!

so we’re like okay, where can we go, bc i have a one story house and it’s full of family members at thanksgiving. i mean FULL. and redacted is sleeping so we dont wanna bother him, but there is literally nowhere that we can go that a family member wouldnt also be there and see us (damn you, open floor plans!!!) so what else can we do but go outside behind the pool shed, obviously.

now, it IS november in philadelphia, so it’s not WARM, but we’re making it work. i got this man bent over in a tiny corner of backyard, shirt fully off, making him see god. weve got our shoes on and mostly pants except for the important parts. hes not making as much noise as i want him to make (bc duh, we gotta be quiet), but im doing my damnedest to make him squeak, so im touching every inch of him that i can. i remember that i was thinking “i wish i had another hand to grab his hair, bc i already have one hand on his balls and the other on his dick and im not willing to give up on either of those for the sake of making him arch his back.” obviously this was a tough decision by me, but what are you gonna do. also at this point important to mention that i dont actually remember all the details, just flashes of stuff and general vibes. i was definitely like “hurry up and come man, we are on borrowed time here,” but taylor was apparently in no rush no matter how much i played with his dick. also at some point i put my hand on his stomach and could feel his abs and how he was moving every time i did and whew. that was hot.

so TRAGICALLY we were interrupted before the grand finale. i am not pleased but hey, if it’s time for dinner then it’s time for dinner. so i sit next to tzp at dinner and redacted sits on the other side and im TRYING to enjoy my MEAL but those two are definitely doing something under the table. whores.

things get a little weird and dreamscape-y here so i’ll skip most of dinner but the only relevant plot point that came up is i found out about something thats been seriously irritating me at work is happening again and so i was kinda pissed. but anyway.

so after dinner all the cousins decide to get in the pool which is insane to do bc it is NOVEMBER and my parents never even have the pool open at thanksgiving, but it’s my dream so fuck weather patterns in guess. so we’re all in the pool and taylor has clearly still not gotten off and redacted and i are having a good time messing with him, you know how it goes, standard pool shenanigans but nothing too bad bc my parents are RIGHT THERE so. keep it pg. but after we go inside?? oh all bets are OFF.

now here’s where things go bad for me. we go inside and we’re only in our towels and we’re all three looking for a place to fuck and we CANT FIND ONE. it’s only a three bedroom house and all three bedrooms are occupied. for some fucking reason we try my parents room first (which im glad was occupied bc i would not be down to fuck in my parents room, ick), but my little sister and my cousin are in there watching a movie with the little cousins, so thats a big fat no thank you. then we go to my sister’s room which yeah, i wouldnt feel GREAT about fucking in there, but it’s a redacteds threesome on the table and if i have to do it i will. but thats where my uncle and aunt are sleeping and hes in there napping after all the pie so thats another no go. so now im pretty pissed off bc of the work thing and also pls why cant we find a place to just FUCK.

so we go into my old bedroom and im thinking this will be fine, this is where redacted and taylor are sleeping anyway, (why didnt we go there first? whos to say) this will be open and we can get down. but we get in there and two people ive never met before are in the bed. what.

so my family tends to take in a lot of strays around the holidays. if you dont have a place to go for thanksgiving and you know a relative of mine, you are automatically invited to my parents house. theres always like 5-6 unrelated people at dinner just bc my uncle or cousin or whomever showed up and was like “i have extras!” and my mom is always like “dope! come in and eat!” it’s a lovely representation of the welcoming nature of my family and culture and it’s something that i always love to see around the holidays but it is also currently FUCKING ME OVER BC I JUST WANT TO BANG THESE MEN IN PEACE!!!

so im like “excuse me, with all due respect, who the fuck are you.” and the one guy was immediately rude (sir you are in MY BED) and was like “your mom said we could stay here so fuck off.” and im like??? YOU fuck off?? but then another part of me is like “no, your mother raised you better than that, you need to be welcoming to people so they dont feel unwanted.” the thing is that at this moment they are in fact VERY unwanted. so taylor is also pissed and redacted is trying to calm him down but keep in mind that taylor hasnt finished still so hes a bit bitchy. and redacted is like “what if we just went and got a hotel room somewhere,” and im like NO, we are in nothing but our bathing suits, we are all horny and ready to go, this is HAPPENING.

so i go back into my parents room and i ask my cousin hey have you seen my mom and also maybe you guys could watch the movie in the basement bc desperate times call for desperate measures and im not gonna fuck in my parents bed but maybe the floor would be fine. and shes like i think your mom is doing the dishes but why do you need a bedroom all to yourself? and i just gave her a look and i was like come on. why do you think. and she asked “ohh, okay, so wait, where do you see this going with taylor?” and i was like “oh it’s not going anywhere, he’s married to redacted, we just fuck around. it’s great, sometimes redacted joins, sometimes not, but it’s always a good time.” and she was somewhat scandalized and i was like oh right. within the context of my family that would be an objectively insane thing to just drop like that.

so anyway. after that the dream gets all weird and dreamy (there was some plotline with kamala harris i think? i think i worked for her? but she was actually also my irl boss interchangeably? idk). but thats the story of how i fucked taylor at thanksgiving in my subconscious. also i just remembered that while i was fucking him and had my hand on his stomach i could feel the outline of my strap through his abs. have a good day i love you 😘

the outline of your strap though his abs is CRAZY GIA. i love it.

also where'd the strap come from, was it stored behind the pool shed for safe keeping, are you just strapped at all times always ready to bend over a gay man? (me next)

[marinetteplztakeabreak]

Another little essay on the mls5 finale

Tl;dr Gabriel Agreste Was Not Redeemed but it Makes Sense to feel weird and gross about it! And i think it was definitely Designed that way and did a very cool job of showing some complicated things

(Under a cut for ml s5 finale spoilers and also She-Ra spoilers because i’m comparing arcs, you dont have to have seen she-ra for this to make sense just, you will get spoilers)

Gabriel Agreste’s death reminded me IMMENSELY of shadow weaver’s death in she-ra. it left me with the same emotions. and i think they’re both Clearly trying to show the same thing

In both, there is this, almost *parody* of a heroic sacrifice??? There is a villain/abusive parent who is SHOWN repeatedly to be evil and to Cause Repeated Harm to their child/main character. But the main character can never quite renounce them because they’re always thrown the tiniest scraps at the very last minute. And this main character is trapped in a never ending cycle of needing to crawl back for help because despite it all they WANT to believe that there is some Pure Underlying Motive behind it all and that actually their parent DOES love them and IS good. Because who WOULDN’T want to believe that, especially in moments of terror and lonliness and the world falling to pieces???

And BOTH of these villains die by a “heroic sacrifice” that THEY think redeems them. They both die as a sacrifice ONLY when it’s a last resort and they’re going to die ANYWAYS if they DONT do anything. and they both make SURE that a child they’ve traumatized On Purpose is Watching Them Die Heroically. For both of them there’s this element of… their death is one last act of traumatizing the person they’re saving and ALSO one last act of making them feel Trapped and like they are In Debt and Have To Stay Loyal to their abusive parent?????

Like???? Gabriel LITERALLY does those tears that may or may not have been fake but were Definitely weaponized to play with marinette’s moral compass and catch her off guard. followed by the like… cackling evil villain act. Istg he was like Playing with marinette like a little ragdoll and Relishing in how Helpless she was as he made the wish. He KNEW he had her trapped, not just By The Miraculous but also Emotionally. He KNEW she had no one else to turn to. He KNEW he held the cards and he could say “make sure adrien remembers me as a hero” and that she’d HAVE to do it. Because he was about to die in front of her and she was going to be messed up by the whole thing and all these secrets and she wasn’t gonna have much choice other than to just Believe He Was Right And Good. As a coping mechanism.

And i think,,, there’s this aura of… he Genuinely thinks he has won. He thinks that he has succeeded in being a Good Father. He thinks that he has Manipulated and Snared his way into being a Hero and Right because he thinks that’s a thing you can do!!!! He doesn’t even consider changing his ways, not when natalie AND adrien AND ladybug all BEG him to listen. He doesnt consider treating anyone else as a person or admitting he could be wrong????? He just doubles down Harder and goes “hahaaaa i have manipulated and traumatized this teenager into continuing my lies and making up a narrative for me where im the hero… this is the same as being a genuienly good parent.”

And i GET the feelings of grossness bc that was a gross thing he did!!!! I agree!!!

But i DONT think he got to get away free or be redeemed????

If anything, it gave me the same gut feeling as shadow weaver’s death in she ra????? Like????? This is the Final Proof that he’s beyond saving because he cant even DIE without using it as one last opportunity to hurt someone he should be protecting????? And he doesnt even Realize that’s messed up he’s just like “heehee i win at tricking those stupid little teenagers into thinking im a hero” with no sense of self reflection.

After watching through that scene a few times i am CONFIDENT it was meant to come off that way and im not actually Sure how much they’ll address it??????

(And im also a teensy bit confused because??? I dont know who the target audience is at this point??? If it really is little kids as the target i am Sure they’ll address it blatantly but the show’s been getting darker and more Nuanced lately. But this is a different point)

but even if they DON’T!!!!! This is just!!! So similar to shadow weaver’s death in she-ra, another cartoon theoretically aimed at children and they DIDNT even address that one at all because it was just,,,,,, SO obvious that even if she DID save the main characters with her death she also used it as a way to twist the knife?????

And so far ive just been talking about Recreation Specifically???? But the REASON gane was dying was bc he literally CATACLYSMED HIMSELF with chat’s hand as a way to trauamtize ladynoir because he thought it would catch them off guard and screw with them!!!!!!!!!!

This is not the narrative saying “oh he had good intentions and was right all along uwu” to me, this was very clearly the narrative saying “sometimes people are so far convinced that theyre the only one that matters that they cant even DIE without using it as a way to hurt and manipulate everyone they should be supporting and wow can that screw people up when they’re left to pick up those pieces and leave them with a complicated mess of emotions.”

and also its saying that it is in fact okay to hate your dead parents if they sucked . And its okay to be have complicated feelings about it, u dont have to be able to make an opinion immediately or seperate yourself from the situation. Sometimes it hurts and you mourn what you shouldve had Anyway.

And i think just like she ra, this is a very Mature and Complicated take and its Okay to have mixed feelings about it, but i just wanted to reassure people that the ending absolutely did not say that gabe was a good person.

It MIGHT have said that the wish actually helped make the world better!!! We don’t know that part yet!!!!

But we DO know that it said,,,,, even IF gabe made One Good Decision, he did it at the cost of everyone he should have been supporting and died with everyone he loved hating him for Good Reason and he used his last seconds of life to traumatize and manipulate a scared little kid into telling everyone he was A Hero . And he was not above beating up and hurting said little kid (ladybug) for funsies. I think even IF his wish IS proven to be A Good Thing (big if) there will STILL be a very valid question of “was it worth it.” There will still be tons of trauma on adrien and marinette’s part that Isnt going away. And that is on him and him alone

[flamemons]

How do you think Digimon Frontier might have gone if the Spirits of Steel, Wood, and Earth had been bequeathed to Ophanimon, the Spirits of Darkness and Water had been bequeathed to Seraphimon, the Spirits of Flame, Light, Ice, Wind, and Thunder had been bequeathed to Cherubimon, and the protagonists had been Katsuharu, Teppei, Chiaki, Teruo, and Koichi (with Kouji joining later)?

im just gonna ramble whatever comes to mind lmao. i drew some stuff too!

uuh while i find it hard to care too much about those other kids because well, I don't know much about them, it is really fun thinking about how kouichi would act if he was there from the start. I think he'd be serious, in a similar way to Kouji, bc he's there on a mission, y'know! All he remembers is following his brother around until Kouji gets some weird text message (wait,,, does kouichi have a phone? probably not, huh. poor people gang ftw...) and now hes in this fuckin place! (hes a dead soul in this au too.) I'd imagine he'd be just as driven as Kouji was, if not more so, bc he KNOWS koujis gotta be here somewhere....but instead of initially trying to avoid the other kids (koujis strategy), he'd probably stick around as soon as he realizes that theyre gonna get themselves killed if they keep acting stupid. So, instead of trying to ditch the kids or act distant, he'd nag them and rush them to stay on track, and come off as kind of a bossy stick-in-the-mud at first

Side note, its easy to think of kouji as being a lot more serious and mature compared to the rest of the frontier kids, but honestly, I have to wonder if he wouldve acted differently if ophanimon wasnt calling him all the damn time telling him that he has to find answers! hes gotta get stronger! theres something he Has To Know!!! like damn if ophanimon was that specific with the other kids they'd also probably be just as sullen. anyway, kouichi would be feeling the same kind of pressure.

in an attempt to make it more interesting for me, chiaki and teruo are now siblings. or close cousins. or something. (what if they were fraternal twins?? that would be so funny actually. there is a statistically improbable amount of twins here!) AND bc i like chiaki the most i think she'd make a cool leader of sorts! like, the lancer to kouichi. kouichi ends up accidentally being the leader bc hes so driven, and chiakis like, a genuinely nice person who really wants to help the digital world as soon as she steps off the first trailmon onto the flame terminal. she also doesnt take shit from anyone. maybe she was a quiet wallflower-type kid at school, but, if its for another's sake, then she'll always speak up! so now, in the digital world, she cant stay quiet!

ah i love just making shit up. this is fun

so together, they make the most chillest leader/lancer duo ever. (hey, if they WERE to be the two Main Ones, wouldnt it be cool if their Susanoomon-type evolution was deep-sea themed? mix darkness and water together, and you get The Fucking Abyss. it could be bioluminescent! a cool way to turn "light into darkness!")

btw, im not drawing any spirit forms here bc I think these kids would have alternative spirit forms as opposed to the evil ones in the show. like, heroic looking ones (basically, no child deserves to have to spirit evolve into grottomon) BUT im no good at character design and that sounds like a lotta work. also, the other spirits (fairymon, chakkmon, agnimon, etc,) would need evil forms too then, right?? that sounds like a REALLY hard thing to try drawing, so nah. just imagine these kids spirit evolving and fighting offscreen. speaking of the other spirits though,

i want chakkmon/tomoki to try pummeling the shit out of katsuharu and teppei!! karmas a bitch!! tomoki didnt get to have his character development in this AU, bc he (probably) fell off the trailmon train tracks and got Got by cherubimon!

i like the main frontier kids too much to not include them in everything i draw Ever, so imagine that maybe they all came to the digital world alone, and wandered around until they found their respective spirits (in similar circumstances to the show) but since those spirits belongto cherubimon, theyre possessed/convinced to fight on cherubimons side!! like "oh shit i have no friends and i hate my life, yea this big evil bunny has a point lets go fuck shit up". maybe some of them are fully in control of their actions, maybe some arent. maybe some of them remember that theyre human, but maybe some of them dont....?

lastly, i have to apologize bc i got completely sidetracked bc i thought "oh takuya and kouji would be very funny as team rocket-esque villains" so heres flamon and strabimon but Evil™

i like to imagine that theyre the Most Incompetent of cherubimons Evil Guys but theyre the only two (that cherubimon knows of) that can form susanoomon so THATS why hes trying to collect all the spirits. bc of that, they DEFINITELY dont remember that theyre human. (bc of that, they also kind of dont have anything to care about, so theyre just trying to have fun)

it would be fun if they were initially kind of lame but although they may be idiots, theyre not Dumb, so they slowly become competent at the same rate as the Heroes do, and instead of a sephirothmon arc theres like.......a beowolfmon and aldamon arc??? im not a writer i dont know. watch these five kids (and counting!) get slowly hunted by two fucking Beasts in the darkest forest ever.

or maybe they do Actually manage to collect all the spirits but it goes so horribly wrong and now theres like ten goddamn kids and ten spirits mashed up in the psyche of a very unstable susanoomon and its just some fucked up Twisted psychological nightmare. digimon evangelion.

basically in this AU, there is even MORE wild tone shifts and the plot goes Absolutely Fucking Bonkers. and takuya's cosplaying Jotaro Kujo for some fucking unknown reason.

thank you for asking! this was....probably not what you were going for, but c'est la vie

[purpleglitch]

in goign to wxpldoe. WHAT WPULD CSAPNAPS REACTION BE WOULD HE HAVE A FEELING SOMETHINGS WEONN AND TRY AND ALSO PROTECT GEORGE BC DREAM CANT BE TEUSTED WOULD HE THINK SOME OF DREAMS SCARS SEEM FAMILAE What would cq's reaction be.

👀👀👀👀👀👀 OK IM HAVING SERIOUS BRAINROT OVER THIS

i think there has to be a set up for that scenario, like the reaction c!dteam have over meeting each other on season 2, i think c!dream wakes up near c!clingy while c!snf wake up near each other, so they would all hide what they felt with a smile and "hi nice to meet you ^_^" but i think they feel things before progressively starting to have flashbacks of places they used to be, things they said and stuff

also this got long LMAO IM SORRY 😭 and sorry if there's parts that don't make sense i was watching sap's stream so i kinda lost track of what i was writing,,

c!dream would feel some kind of relief like he can breathe again but also be anxious like they're going to leave him again soon, with c!sapnap he feels scared of doing something that angers him and deep heartache, old memories from them being kids long forgotten. with c!george he feels like a spark of light on his life and warmth like a deep bond between them but then replaced with guilt and regret

c!sapnap would feel happiness of seeing c!dream again but a weird mix of uneasyness because he feels like he has to do something to c!dream (fulfill his promise he doesn't remember) and his hands twitch for a second but he stays still, he avoids eye contact because it makes him feel weird.... (doesn't rationalize he feels sad and guilty) also he's very close to c!george because of the weeks they spent roaming the world together after meeting when they woke up

c!george would feel like a weight got lifted off his shoulders, the first few days with c!sapnap convinced him that he's not dreaming, he doesnt know why he would think it was but by the time he meets c!dream he feels awake, and the deep longing and yearning that at some point became part of him in season 1, finally leaves and he resists the urge to hug him (dorry my cdnf demons)

so when it comes the point of c!dnf's relationship growing and with that c!dream becoming c!george's protector, i think c!sapnap would notice that closeness and feel weirded out about it, something telling him to not trust dream with george's safety, that he's putting on a facade to later betray everyone, but he tries his best to ignore those thoughts, he just met dream, why would he think that about him? but yeah i think he would try and go with them or maybe spy on them but it's all so weird for sap, he sees how protective and paranoid dream is and how his hands tremble holding the sword

it isnt until something happens that hurts dream that george and sap carry him to the main base and after taking his armor off and clothes to bandage him they see his scars and it's sickening, the jagged scars, the clean cuts, the burn marks, everything, what if they try to ask dream about it but he says he doesnt know as he starts tearing up. i think after that, sap trusts dream more but is still wary about that weird dynamic he has with george, and george tries to make dream stop acting like he's his knight. OMG WHAT IF THERE'S MISCOMMUNICATION. dorry that's another au that i have in mind LMAO.

also with c!q..... when cdream meets him there's something about his eyes, the way he looks at him and the scar over his left eye that makes his skin crawl and he feels nauseous. what if c!q has a mannerism of washing his hands constantly because he has nightmares of having them covered in blood. also what if c!q and c!sapnap are also protective over c!george when he's alone with c!dream (memories of mexican lmanberg). what if c!dream avoids being alone with c!q for too long, he doesnt want to fully assume but he knows c!q is responsible for his scars but not at what extent, and when he's around him he's trying not to have a panic attack every time he hears q laugh or move too fast near him. what if c!q without knowing much about c!dream, he knows what scars he's hiding under his clothes (which cover his entire body, only the ones on his face are visible)

[eyefocusing]

might be a random question but do you have any neurodivergent headcanons for the aerialbots?

im not immune to hcing all of my faves as autistic....

ok but like in every superion bio theres mention of him tamping down/blocking out his components to become the cold, focused combiner that he is, and i feel like "supressing yourself so you can actually function" is just sooooo on the nose, yknow?

skydive obviously has a special interest in history and war strategy. helpful, when you're the strategist of the team. hes like, a genuine savant when it comes to flying, but he can easily get caught up infodumping abt the pilot who created the technique theyre trying to practice, instead of actually practicing. hes the kinda guy who has to make Everything about his special interest, but stays pretty quiet if he cant.

slingshot is SO classic Cant Regulate Emotions At All. he makes up for it by being a showoff and a compulsive liar. neither of these things make anyone like him much. he tends to have meltdowns with some frequency, which hasnt done much for his reputation either. his meltdowns are usually overwhelming for the other aerialbots too, so they end up scattering and leaving silverbolt to fix the situation.

many many feelings about fireflight autism bc he gets woobified a lot (i remember poking around the tf plotbunny lj a year or so ago and seeing a bunny from like 2008 abt him "suffering from autism" so hes at least always had That Vibe). hes just very observant. doesnt really have a lot to say! but not really a good listener either because he WILL start thinking abt that interesting rock poking out of the wall or that bird he saw while he was out earlier, and just completely misses whats being said to him. he and skydive are a good mix bc skydive can just talk and talk abt his jet fighter blorbos and fireflight can do fireflight things and theyre both fine with this. also think abt this ⬇️ kind of scenario a lot

hes also most likely to collect Weird Stuff. his whole personal shelf is full of bins of strange twigs or scrap metal or basically anything that catches his interest. hes a bit of a corvid tbh

if fireflight is the guy that everyone assumes is autistic, then air raid is absolutely the guy everyone assumes has adhd. his attention span doesnt exist, unless hes doing something he wants to do. hes the closest thing to an adrenaline junkie the team has. raid doesnt go off on his own the way fireflight does, but the odds of him actually following through on orders and plans are slim. he tends to run into walls and corners and doorways a lot (he and flighty both have spacial awareness issues, but fireflights are more obvious in alt mode, and air raids in bot mode).

silverbolt. has to manage all of them and himself. and its incredibly overwhelming. from the outside hes got the vibe that hes one bad incident away from shutting himself in a broom closet for the rest of the day to get away from it all. hes got a bad habit of getting stuck in his head, and his thoughts tend to doom spiral after awhile. but thats like half the reason the other aerialbots are so annoying at him, and he can uh. appreciate. their methods of getting him away from himself. most of the time. i like putting everyone in a planepile because i think bolt would like the feeling of the others weight on his wings. it makes him feel grounded

[bogosbintedthealien]

Short OMARI fic idea (LOVED ONE COMES BACK W R O N G)

WAIT LET ME COOK!

Okay so besides that Mari lives Au fic I'm writing rn I have another Omori au fic (it's crack treated srsly so I wanna keep it to myself until I finish it) which long story short is good ending Sunny still jumps bc he thinks his friends can only start healing w/o him there and he wakes up in an OMARI AU where Sunny was in a coma. And there's a lot of different and weird shit so Sunny's way out of his head. It's clear that this is a different reality, not a different timeline.

ANYWAY HERE'S THE BRAIN ROT!!!

So, I've seen quite a few fics where Mari just comes back out of nowhere (usually her grave) and whoever she bumps into first is just hella chill w/ her being back alive after 4 years and they wanna show her off to everyone else??? Like, no shade to the fics, I just didn't find myself particularly liking thos fics and I don't think I finished any.

So I read one where good ending Sunny still jumps and wakes up in an OMARI AU. Basil found him and while he said he killed himself but he also said he went missing (on 2nd read realized Basil was half convincing himself of the latter thing) but it made me think.

I fucking love fiction where someone dies and only one or small amount know this for sure and then that person comes back but SOMETHING IS DEEPLY WRONG. Like,,,yas sign me the fuck up!!! You can do so much w/ that!!!

So this one also is good ending Sunny still jumps and wakes up in an OMARI AU but!!!! Sunny is fucking dead in that one. Our Sunny isn't meant to be here. So in the OMARI AU, Mari shoved/causes Sunny to fall down the stairs and she's weeping over his body trying to get him to wake in as she's in shook and hasn't registered his neck snapped. Hero walks in at this time and sees what's going and realizes quick that, Sunny isn't breathing, he has no pulse.

So he gets Mari to go with him into the woods and they bury him deep in the woods. Ofc she's in shock and dissociating the whole time while Hero is panicking, to parallel Sunny and Basil in the base game.

He get Mari to claim she woke up later than she was supposed to and looked around the house for her brother only to discover the backdoor was open. And that Hero even tried to help look for him. Everyone else thinks Sunny ran away while the teens know what they did and keep quite about it.

A year passes and that's when our Sunny get dumped into this world. He's all dirty and raggedy and wearing clothes he doesn't recognize. He's in the woods and makes his way back to town. Basil (ig? I just know I want one of the younger kids to find him bc they just think he went missing) finds him and is all ecstatic. Treating him and stuff and bombing him with questions. Our Sunny figures out p soon of what's up and that he's not where he should be, but doesn't reveal himself bc who the fuck will believe him? He can't just tell the truth. So he pretends he just...doesn't remember what's he's been up to for the last year. Just a missing persons who came back with no memories of what happened when they were gone. He's know he's heard about cases like that.

Sunny puts on an act of being frustrated and scared that he has this gap in his memories and that he feels like he's dead. Feels like he isn't real and that this isn't real. (Maybe some of his real feelings leaks thorough which makes it all the more convincing.)

So yadda yadda, everyone's over the moon to see he's back and the adults drop the whole 'where've you been?' and 'what happened?' just assuming xyz. Don't look a gifted horse in the mouth.

But Mari...when she sees him she loses it bc I KILLED HIM HES DEAD WE BURIED HIM WE BURIED HIM WE BURIED HIM WE BURIED HIM.

Sunny is happy to just,,,be around a Mari again and acts all clingy while Mari is trying to act normal about it but is terrified inside bc WHAT IS THIS WHO IS HE WHAT IS THIS IN FRONT OF ME IT CANT BE HIM WEBURIEDHIM.

She later come to a conclusion (this scene is why I wanna write this fic in the first place) as she's having a meltdown(?) breakdown(?) to Hero on the phone. At first she thought just maybe that this Sunny was some ghost here to haunt them, or was undead. But the supernatural isn't real so the only logic conclusion she can jump to is 'HE WAS ALIVE AND WE BURIED HIM. OH MY GOD HERO HE WAS ALIVE AND WE BURIED HIM. WE BURIED SUNNY.' She basically is convinced they were wrong about him being dead or maybe just somehow his heart restarted and WE BURIED HIM WE BURIED HIM HE WAS ALIVE AND WE BURIED HIM.

She thinks that Sunny was alive the whole time and woke up after they buried him and dug out of his own grave and the shock of all that made him forget things and just wander off. She think someone probs picked him up (he was found in unfamiliar clothes after all) and finally the shock or mental block finally dropped and he instinctively went back home and doesn't remember what happened to him during the shock state/mental block he had.

Hero on the other hand, isn't convinced that it's Sunny. He knows that happened. He's wasn't breathing, there was no pulse. He held him, he buried him.

That wasn't Sunny.

Hero think's our Sunny is a ghost here to haunt them, then maybe an undead and lastly lands on: SOMETHING IS WEARING HIS SKIN WEARING HIS FACE USING HIS VOICE THAT ISN'T SUNNY SUNNY IS DEAD I BURIED HIM IN THE WOODS LAST YEAR.

HOW DARE YOU LOOK LIKE HIM HOW DARE YOU

So for the last chapter he wants to convince Mari she's wrong. That that thing isn't Sunny. And he wants validation. So he treks into the woods to where they buried him and digs and dig and digs and dig and digs until there's blood. His blood.

And he finds it. Bones. Human bones. Fabric hidden deep in the dirt.

THAT THING WASN'T SUNNY. HE'S RIGHT HERE WHERE I BURIED HIM.

oh god

He turns to look towards town.

its in the house with mari...

OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD THAT THING'S IN THE HOUSE WITH MARI

MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI MARI

Is the only thing he's think as he books it back to town.

And that's the end of the fic. It just stops there. I did say I wanted this to be a short fic. Also sorry this post is sloppy and not that cohesive like my last one but I'm writing this as I go late at night and just wanted to air out my brain rot.

I'm aiming for 5 chapters (won't be adding much filler to this) and I know for sure that it won't go to 10. Probs wanna finish it first, then post the dang thing but it's probs only gonna take me a month to write.

[fagbearentertainment]

Kaito is supposed to be satire on shounen protagonists but they forgot the satire part

He's constantly making Shuichi do all the work and then trying to take credit for everything which is like. so fucking annoying. Not too bad though, if it was just that I wouldn't hate him

In ch4 Kaito throws a temper tantrum bcs Shuichi disagreed with him and agreed with Kokichi (the horrors!!) and their friendship is strained but fsr the game wants me to believe they're both at fault here????? Like what?????? I need you to understand - Kaito was incorrect in the trial. Being incorrect means death for everyone. Why am I supposed to think that Shuichi was in the wrong for saying the truth? Just bcs Kaito doesnt like it? Get over yourself you self centered asshole everyone almost DIED bcs of you you should be APOLOGIZING

Then SHUICHI tries apologizing to HIM but Kaito refuses to talk to him???? Does this count as guilt tripping I can't tell

Like. "How dare you disagree with me? I won't talk to you again until I need your help, making you feel even worse for disagreeing with me" feels kinda. suspicious

Not to mention that the nickname "sidekick" implies that Shuichi is inherently lesser than Kaito

And then there's Maki!!!

In chapter 3, he started harassing her bcs he decided he knows what's best for her and refuses to take no for an answer. Off to a great start!

She finally goes along with his bullshit. She makes it very obvious she does not want to be there. He keeps dragging her back anyway. fun stuff

So her character development sucks but I can't tell if that's a Kaito sucks issue or a the writers suck issue but basically she becomes a lot more emotional and a lot more murderous and everyone's just. Okay with that

So in chapter 5 she starts strangling Kokichi for no reason in particular and Kaito tells her to stop. but like. His reason why she should stop is so weird ? It's not "Killing is wrong", it's "Monokuma wants us to kill each other". I swear, it's like he doesnt think of Kokichi as a person so it's okay to kill him or something. I'm supposed to root for this guy?

One last thing I'll mention is innnnnnnnnnnn chapter 2. When everyone finds the flashback light. Everyone gives very good and logical reasons why using these things isn't a good idea but then Kaito's like "Yea but we cant move forward w/o taking risks :)" and everyone except Kokichi comes around. (Kichi does stay but he makes it very clear he still thinks this is a bad idea) Like what the fuck happened here

And all of this would've been fine if he was properly called out for his bullshit!! But he wasn't!!!!! The narrative wants you to unconditionally love him, even though he loves his friends conditionally. Hilarious how that works

I think there was also some other smaller things that build up but I can't remember rn. It's been a hot second since I last booted the game lol

~the bigender Charlie anon

—————————————————————————

I don’t remember a whole lot of character dialogue from drv3 aside bc it’s my least favorite on the trilogy but yikes. he’s WAY WORSE than I remember lol

[snellyfish]

Obligatory “what did you feel about the new episode” ask 👀💕

HI ive been out travelling and im an old man when it comes to mobile but ill try to gather my thoughts :)

Ace eating disorder represent,,, woo,,,,,, sad party blower sound,, love thst for us,,,, Holds his hand and makes out with him. Also eternally banger voice actor choice for him. Absolutely amazing performance every time he speaks.

Obligatory I love Arei. recently revamped an OC I made 5 years ago and basing a lot of her personality and stuff off of Arei. Just felt like sharing. I love Arei so much I will make her my oc methinks.

THE MOTIVES MADE ME SO FERAL I PAUSED THE VIDEOS SO MANY TIMES AND WAS LIKE AAIOGIGOGOUUGHHHH SO MANY HORRIBLE HORRIBLE FUCKED UP BLORBOS I CANT WAIT TO LEARN EVERYPONY'S SECRETS OM NOM NOM<33 Speaking of which JESUS CHRIST I really feel like the secret motives some ppl held onto, like, REALLY shouldn't have been kept to themselves omg. I'm sure there's been some behind the scenes stuff of characters gaining distaste/distrust/avoiding certain ppl after receiving certain motives;; I'm not entirely sure WHO specifically, but these are like CRAZY things to not warn the rest of the class about. Was David's the one that Arei got? Killed a man with no remorse? Huh? Shoves you pushes you shoves you into locker and swallows the key

The entire time during episode 9 I was trying and failing to open a jar of ice cream so I was a Little out of it, but from what I gather I'm really dumb and not good at mysteries so i have no clue who the hell did it. At one point I asked "alright who killed a man?" but my bestie heard "who killed min?" so I just kept saying that for the rest of the episode and crying of laughter. Guys, be honest, who killed Min- I'm not mad I just wanna know, guys-

Nico continues to piss me off a little. Teruko goes without saying she pisses me off to no end. When everyone started dragging her handwriting I was whooping and cheering and hollering it was so funny GET HER.

I liked how the two main people investigating the corpse were Arturo and Veronika. They really do get a lot of screentime together and it's starting to scare me a little. Is this like subtle ship fanservice or am I about to meet horrors beyond my comprehension as the story and cases develop. I hope one of them kills the other. They're so in love.

I also liked at one point Veronika dragging Ace's ass. They're ALSO in love btw. Yeah I'll ship my top 3 faves together, what else would you expect from me, man

Rose....<3

DAVID!!!!!!<3333 I know his ass was lying about history of depression that shit was so funny be honest bro you have unfathomable sins keep it 100% with us. If you turn out to not be fucked up or morally grey ykno I'll be a little disappointed. Just keep it real with us.

The motive that's like "where do I even start, everything about your life is worth killing for" is so funny bc if that was mine I would be like. okay. not my problem. That's so incredibly vague that means NOTHING. I'm also assuming it's Teruko's tbh, it's the only one vague and weird enough for her to be like "imma keep ot real with you chief idfk which of these are mine 🐸"

What else. I'm a little hungover

every time they brought up the fish I was like haha. like snellyfish. I'm an accomplice in Arei's murder and I didn't even know!!

kinda hashtag don't blame Hu for not telling whose motive she got bc it was a little suicide coded and very personal

That's all I'm done I forget what else happened xoxo love you all I love drdt so much--

I lied I just remembered that Eden lesbian (sapphic whatever I don't care) and laughed really hard at the idea of like. Charles opening the motive without reading the name and just thinking like "I'M A LESBIAN?????" real

Eden/Nico could be real if I didn't have a leaning negative opinion of Nico rn. I am still patient and hearing them out for now tho.

Ok Now I'm done.

[orchidsangel]

ok i wanna start this by saying this is pure rant. totally unimportant feelings about the show. i’d do a whole analysis or essay type thing but i’ve done enough of that against my will </3

i started titans for nightwing and starfire bc they were my favorite actors. seriously anna diop is so gorgeous i couldn’t get over it and still won’t. in a way, i also started watching for jason because it seemed like a whole new take on his character (bc it was) and i was excited on how they’d do the whole robin/red hood story with the titans. jason’s introduced as the immature and loud teenager which didn’t seem like a good idea for the red hood part of his story but he’s also still robin at this point. at the time i think he was moreso there to introduce nightwing’s development and departure from being robin because batman in this show is just yucky. i don’t remember enough to talk about that tho lawl

then it gets suckier than it started because out of nowhere the whole team starts treating jason like shit. he goes from the goofy one to the young and always angry character and that’s when i just KNEW they were finna fuck him over. first off the team (nightwing, star, raven, yada yada) takes in this girl rose wilson bc slade’s trying to kill her. if you guessed that she’s actually there to help slade kill the titans or whatever then you’d be right, she’s basically like tera from the judas contract if you watched that. and they made her jason’s LOVE INTEREST and at first they were cute but UHJHJGJFJFJ i cant start on that rn

so like i said earlier right now jason’s the immature angry teenager of the group. at some point someone (im pretty sure it was rose) pranks everyone by putting some fucked up shit in their rooms, like drawing crosses all over raven’s room. tell me why EVERYONE AUTOMATICALLY BLAMES JASON??? they just assumed he did it for whatever fucking reason. so that’s one way the team treated him like shit 😭 another ginormous part to this: yk how jason goes after the joker even tho batman told him not to?? it’s basically that but instead of the joker it was slade that he went after. got kidnapped and tortured cuz what’s a jason todd character w/o that right. then he ALMOST died but didn’t bc superboy saved his life, blah blah blah all this other stuff and then he almost commits suicide! wowww so fun!

so at this point i’m thinking “ok thst was weird but trust the process right???” long story short nightwing fucks up, team disbands, jason and rose disappear for the whole next season or wtvr, then in a random episode jason and rose are basically confirmed to be dating and i think they live in part of bruce’s mansion or smth??? idk anyway over the course of a few episodes we see their relationship develop and they’re actually kinda cute. like jason fake proposed to her with six bigass sandwiches that he made and it was so adorable and BOOM rose tells him she was originally supposed to sabotage the titans and that’s why the team disbanded so he’s like “ykw fuck you” and then he disappears AGAIN. this was very random so i just assumed it was supposed to add on to why he did what he did later on…

ok now when he comes back we get into red hood. i guess they kinda mashed jason’s original story with the arkham knight story??? i forgot exactly what happened but i think what happened was he got buddy buddy with scarecrow and reverse engineered his fear gas so that it gives you a munch of adrenaline and makes you fearless or wtvr. this was one of my least favorite things about this interpretation of jason because making him rely on drugs to do the things he wants to without fear just. does not make sense to me??? if anything i feel like jason would despise drug addiction and things of the like but that’s neither here nor there! so now he’s pumped full of drugs and he goes to find the joker. then he dies and gets dumped in the lazarus pit in the same episode so him dying has literally no significance. THEN BRUCE KILLS THE JOKER. so now i’m stuck like wtf are they finna do with this narrative??? literally eliminated one of the biggest parts of red hood. atp i’m wondering where tf they’re going with this and the answer is they went NO WHERE WITH IT. jason becomes red hood (and no hate to curran walters but it was lame as fuck) and does a lot of fucked up shit because scarecrow promised him power or whatever so now there’s no depth to what he’s doing and it takes him getting kidnapped and almost killed for the THIRD TIME before he decides he’s not doing the right thing. so he says fuck scarecrow and tries to help the titans stop whatever he was doing and ugh it’s just such sucky writing.

tl;dr only thing that kept me watching was a thirst for jason todd content, brenton thwaites and anna diop. like there are probably hours worth of stuff in that show i skipped bc it had nothing to do with the only three things i cared about. only thing that i was satisfied with was nightwing and starfire being together. there’s more stuff i could add but this was specifically for jason and how let down i was 💔

-🦦

that genuinely seems like a shit show. like idk if i could handle that. the way they mashed up like ALL of his "death and resurrection" plots?? no ma'am. you're better than be for even watching all of that because i simply couldn't. i've seen tiktok edits of rose and jason from titans and, not to sound like a broken record but, her wig??? kill me now.

i also just don't like curran walters as jason. he's too pocket-sized idk.

ALSO. i looooooooooove judas contract so bad. one of my fave dcau movies, just so fucking good!!

[taomyou]

The Romance of Reimbursements - Chapter 16

Pairing: Levi Ackerman x Reader Status: COMPLETED Summary: There’s a guy you see every Friday on bus 143, and you think he’s pretty hot. It wouldn’t hurt to tell your best friend about him, would it? or, you and Levi take the same bus home from work every Friday, and you fall in love slowly, clumsily, and with all the time in the world to fold as many paper stars as your heart desires. Word Count: 7.7k Tags: slow burn, friends to lovers, modern au, office au, fluff, romance, meet-cute, matchmaking (A/N: this fic is entirely available on ao3 here if you would like to read it there instead!) Chapter Navigation Accompanying Playlist

the feeling not understood

When you're comfortably situated in your usual seat on bus 143 on Monday after work, you reach to take your phone out of your pocket to give yourself something to occupy yourself with for the next 45 minutes. You see a text from Hange, so you smile and go to unlock your phone to read it.

Hange - 5:20 PM

Remember to leave saturday free!!! We're celebrating Moblit's birthday with everyone at Sina's :D

You - 5:22 PM

his birthday is today, right?

Hange - 5:23 PM

Yup!!

You - 5:23 PM

tell him i say happy birthday ^^

Hange - 5:24 PM

What makes you think Im seeing him today?

You smile to yourself and shake your head. Right, they still don't know you know they're together.

You - 5:25 PM

i never said you were going to see him today i simply don't have his number to tell him myself

Hange - 5:25 PM

WAIT HAVE I NEVER ADDED YOU TO OUR GROUP CHAT????? Oh my god I cant believe we've gone this far without adding you IM SO SORRY

You roll your eyes.

You - 5:26 PM

it really isn't a big deal, i don't need anyone's number

Hange - 5:26 PM

NO NO I MUST RIGHT MY WRONGS Honestly tho we never use it anymore bc Levi has had us muted since like february and we have to text him separately anyway STILL I AM SO SO SORRY LET ME ASK THEM RN IF I CAN ADD YOU

Before you can even come up with a way to tell them that you really don't mind that you haven't gotten access to this apparently dead group chat, you see a text from a group chat titled The Hottest People Ever. You giggle at the title before switching over to see what's going on there.

Hange's typing when you get loaded in, but they're taking a while to type out whatever they're trying to say, so you go to check who's in the group chat. There's two numbers you don't have saved (presumably Mike and Moblit), Hange, of course, Levi, and Erwin.

Erwin's number is actually saved as "Erwin (WORK, DO NOT ANSWER)" because you haven't had the chance to change it since becoming better friends, so you quickly remove the parenthetical before clicking back to the chat.

Hange - 5:30 PM

Hello!!! WELCOME TO THE GROUP CHAT ASTRAEA!! Everyone say hi pls :D 

Unknown Number - 5:31 PM

Hello! This is Moblit :)

You - 5:32 PM

hi!! happy birthday ^^

You quickly go to add him to your contacts, as well as Mike since he’s probably the other number you don’t already have.

Moblit - 5:33 PM

Oh, thank you!

Everyone else is probably busy, going by the fact that there’s no other texts that come in, so you exit out of the chat to scroll through SNS.

In the middle of you reading some random news article talking about the economy, you get a text from Erwin.

Weird, he never texts you. If anything, he’s the type to only call.

You tap on the notification to see what’s up.

Erwin - 6:05 PM

Sorry for the late notice, but could you stay late tomorrow? I need help with something.

The period at the end of the message comes off as way more passive aggressive than you’re sure he intended, but you still feel intimidated by the relatively minor punctuation.

You - 6:08 PM

Sure.

You cringe when you go to send the message, the capitalization and punctuation too serious for how you normally text, but you figure that’s good enough of a way to respond to Erwin (who was just speaking to you as your boss and not your friend).

You hope that he takes offense to your reply, actually. Who actually wants to stay even later than normal at their fucking office job?

You get home soon thereafter, and while you do your homely chores and get dinner ready, you try your best to take your mind off of the impending doom that awaits you at work tomorrow. Knowing how the workflow has been for the last… four months now, Erwin’s probably asking for your help for the rest of the week and not just Tuesday.

At least you have Saturday’s dinner to look forward to. Maybe you can tell the waiter to pick Erwin’s credit card in the roulette.

✰

The next morning when you leave for work, you're unsurprised to see Moblit walking out of Hange's apartment, arms full with bags of gifts. You both wave to each other in greeting, and because you're both headed in the same direction, you end up walking together.

“Need help with the gifts?”

“No, I’m alright. Thank you for offering, though!”

“You sure? Your arms are, uh, pretty full.”

“Yeah, I don’t mind.”

There’s a door between where you are and where the elevator is, so you go ahead and get that open so he can get through. You push the button for the ground floor, and he thanks you before the both of you step into the lift.

“How’re you and Hange? You guys look really happy together,” you tell him in earnest.

“Oh! Have they finally told you? I thought they wanted to keep it a secret, like, for fun.”

You roll your eyes. “They haven’t, you guys are just terrible at sneaking around.”

He chuckles, shaking his head. “Yeah, I guess we are. I run into you practically every time I’m leaving their place.”

“Yeah, I don’t really know what you were thinking with that,” you say.

The elevator beeps once you’ve reached the ground floor, and you step out first so you can hold the doors open as he stumbles out. He thanks you, and before you split paths, he answers your question from earlier.

“And we’re great, I feel like I’m falling in love with them all over again,” he beams. “I’ve had a crush on them since uni, but I didn’t really know what to do about it until a couple months ago.”

You reflexively smile and go to put a hand over your heart. Moblit’s such a sweet guy, you really couldn’t wish anyone better for your best friend.

“You guys are so cute,” you gush. “Drop hints to go public, yeah? I have a bunch of candid photos of you and them walking in the courtyard here, and I’m sure Hange would want them.”

He perks up. “Wait, could you send those to me? My phone wallpaper is just an old picture of us at graduation, but I’ve been meaning to change it.”

You nod enthusiastically. “Yeah, of course, I’ll get them to you!”

You wave goodbye to him, and he gives you a nod before heading off to the parking lot and presumably back to his car.

Ugh, you hate the both of them (in a “they’re so cute, I need to strangle them” kind of way).

As you’re walking over to the bus station, you sigh, remembering what Erwin texted you yesterday.

Thinking about it presently, what is there for you to even help him with? He definitely is the better lawyer between the two of you (objectively, at the very least), so what does he need you specifically for?

Yeah, you most definitely will be making sure his card gets chosen on Saturday.

✰

Turns out, Erwin needed you to review some work reports, entrusting the task to you while he's gone at higher-up meetings. You were right to assume that it wouldn’t be just Tuesday—it was Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday.

Reviewing such paperwork isn’t particularly difficult, but it takes fucking forever, and you can’t afford to make any mistakes. Because of this, the next couple of days pass by slowly, with both nothing and everything happening all at once.

Unfortunately, the slow pace doesn’t mean anything anyway because you aren't able to get even a second to breathe, and when you finally go to take your seat next to Levi on Friday at 3:02 PM, you can only greet him with a defeated sigh.

It’s a miracle you’re here at all, considering how late you’ve been coming out of the office for the last 3 days. How you managed to get all of your work done before this exact moment, you have no idea.

You’re too exhausted to try and strike up conversation in the moment, so you prop your briefcase up higher so you can put your head down on it comfortably and close your eyes.

“Sorry, is it okay if I rain check on talking today?” Your voice comes out weaker than you intend it to, but you’re much too tired to pay any attention to it.

You feel a bit of weight at your left side, and you’re unsurprised when you turn to see that Levi’s lightly tapped his shoulder against yours.

“Yeah, get some sleep.”

You hum tiredly. “I don’t need sleep.”

“You sure about that?”

“Yep, I just need to quit my job,” you whine. “Ugh, I still have to go grocery shopping, maybe I’ll go tomorrow.”

“Are you actually going to do that? Quit your job?”

“Of course not, but it’s nice to dream.”

Your mind actually is too busy to let you fall asleep even with your head down, so you just sit there quietly, waiting for the bus to eventually get to your destination.

For whatever reason, it feels like it’s enough to just be sitting next to Levi. Your nerves leave you slowly, and you eventually get to settle further into your spot and enjoy as the scenery passes you by.

It’s the middle of spring, so the flora on the route is in full bloom, lighting up the way with bright colors and visible gusts of pollen.

You wish you could muster up the energy to talk to Levi—to ask him about his week, to tell him about yours.. You’re not physically tired; you very well could.

But when you turn to look at him, he looks content with the silence that covers the two of you, going by his stare out at the same flowery paths that pass by in the window.

You open your mouth to speak, but you can’t find the words to say. Somehow, you can sense that if you do talk, he’s just going to tell you to shut up anyway.

Or maybe he’d look up the definition of “rain check” on his phone to make sure you understand what it means.

You smile gently at the thought before putting your head down again on your briefcase, and you close your eyes. Not really to sleep, but you might as well try to get some of your energy back before heading home.

✰

When the bus’s sound system tells you that you’ve reached Rose, you lift your head from your briefcase and yawn, making sure to cover your mouth. “Get home safe, Levi,” you tell him, slowly blinking yourself awake.

When you wave goodbye to him, however, you’re taken off-guard by the warmth that takes over you when he takes hold of your hand and gently pulls you up.

You get the message quickly enough and scramble to get your briefcase secured in your other hand, but you’re unable to ask any questions as you try to get yourself oriented enough to get off the bus. 

You manage to tell the driver a “thank you,” but other than that, you’re at a loss for words until you’re both safely on the sidewalk, the bus leaving a huge gust of wind behind it and blowing both your and Levi's hair in all directions.

The two of you just stare at each other, daring the other to speak, but you hardly feel like you’re the one who has to do any explaining.

And he probably feels the same way, because he wordlessly turns away from you and lightly tugs at your hand. When he starts walking, you have to jog a step or two to catch up with him.

“Where are we going?”

He doesn’t slow his pace, instead giving a squeeze to your hand. The contact is hardly meaningful in that he’s probably only holding your hand to drag you around, so you won’t take it as anything else.

“Surprise.”

Well, you doubt he could take you anywhere surprising, especially when you know that the only things in the immediate area are Magnolia Floral Company, the supermarket, and his car, but you suppose you’ll entertain him. Not like you have anywhere else to be anyway.

When you’re taken to the front of the supermarket, you’re hardly surprised, but you still play along. “The grocery store? I never would’ve guessed!”

He rolls his eyes and flicks your forehead, eliciting a whine from you. “Really, now?”

While you rub at your forehead to make a show of the pain (it really doesn’t hurt at all, it’s just in good fun), he drags you both over to get a shopping cart. He puts his backpack in, and you follow suit with your briefcase.

He lets go of your hand to push the cart, and you feel like you miss the warmth. It’s hardly winter, and the weather is definitely warm enough, but your hand feels… cold, all of a sudden.

Instead of weaving through the lanes like you’d think he normally would, he stops at the very beginning of the produce section and just stares at you.

You blink owlishly at him. “What’re you looking at me for?”

He rolls his eyes, almost ruefully so. “You’re the one who has to get groceries, or did you forget already?”

You raise an eyebrow. “That’s why we’re here?”

“Yes, so start putting shit in and let me pay while you’re at it,” he says. Before you can protest, he continues. “And none of your ‘stop paying me back’ shit, we both know neither of us are letting up anytime soon.”

You’re still frozen in place, at yet another loss for words, but when Levi reaches over to seemingly try and flick your forehead again, you move out of the way to get out in front of him. “Okay, okay, but you have to get something too. I don’t want this to be a waste of your time.”

He scoffs. “As if I have anything better to do right now.”

You lead the both of you through the aisles, looking at anything and everything. You’re hesitant to add things to the cart, but even when you put things back on the shelf, Levi moves to put them in anyway. You chastise him for it, telling him you don’t want him spending too much money on you, but he just flips you off and continues to follow you as you venture through the store.

At the checkout, he’s quick to get ahead of you so you don't get the chance to pay, and you just roll your eyes before loading everything on the conveyor belt.

When the cashier hands the receipt to him, Levi scratches both the singular and total prices out with his nail before handing the long sheet to you. “For you to make your stars.”

You take it from him with a nod, and you tuck it into your pocket before helping him put everything back in the cart. He pushes it out for you, and before you know it, you’re both in front of his car.

“I assume you’re driving me home.”

“No, you’re gonna have to haul all of this stuff back to the bus,” he deadpans. “Yes, get in.”

You laugh. “At least let me help put everything in your car.”

He shakes his head, but he lets you do just that. He wheels the cart back to its designated space in the parking lot after handing you his keys to start the car, and you get yourself situated in the passenger seat after you do that. By the time he comes back, you’ve already torn off your first strip of paper, and you’re looping it onto itself.

He reaches over you to his glove box, and from it, he pulls out a small box of blueberry merlot tea. He puts it between the both of you on the little open space, probably because your hands aren’t free in the moment.

“Did you take me grocery shopping because you forgot to bring the tea with you?” You ask.

He hums to himself as he goes to back out of the parking space, his hand on the back of your headrest. “Maybe,” he replies, “but Erwin’s been complaining about work a lot more than usual, which means you probably had a tough week too. Might as well help make you feel better while you’re here.”

You sigh. “As if it isn’t his fault I’ve been so busy at the office. That fucker asked me to help with reports all week.”

“Or so I’ve heard. Don’t worry, I chewed him out for it already.”

You laugh, and you shake your head. “Thank you, I guess.”

As always, the drive is silent, save for the rustling of paper. You reach your apartment easily enough, and he goes ahead and parks in the parking garage for the building. You hand him the stars you’ve made from the receipt, and he reaches over again for his glove box to put them away.

You know he’s going to do it anyway, so you let him carry some of the groceries up to your apartment with you. When you reach your unit, you get your keys and open the door to let him in to get everything set on the table.

You’re still at the door, watching as he does that, and when he comes back to you to leave, he gives a curt nod.

“Get home safe.”

“Stealing my jokes now?”

“I made it first.”

You blink. “Huh? When?”

He rolls his eyes. “When I dropped you off after our Valentine’s Day disaster.”

You sigh, shaking your head. “You still make fun of me when I say it.”

“It’s only funny when I say it.”

“You get home safe too, then.”

He nods, and you watch as he starts to walk back in the direction you both came from, and before you can stop yourself, you yell out his name.

“Levi!”

He isn’t too far, so the volume really isn’t necessary, but he still turns around. “What?”

You look back and forth between him and the groceries that’re set on your dining table, and you think for maybe two seconds before deciding that it’d only be fair for him to at least have some use for your groceries, seeing as he’s the one who paid for them.

“Do you want to stay for dinner?” You ask.

He stares blankly back at you, but after checking the time on his watch, he eventually shrugs and walks back over to you. “Sure, but only if you let me help cook.”

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding, and you open the door further to let him inside again. “Okay, fine.”

You go to quickly change out of your work clothes, not wanting to get them dirty with anything in the kitchen, and you bring back the same set of clothes Levi wore last time he was over so he can do the same. He excuses himself to go change, and you hum to yourself as you get everything sorted out so you can figure out what to cook for the both of you. Levi comes back out relatively quickly, his work clothes neatly folded up, and he sets that at the edge of your dining table before joining you in the kitchen.

You aren’t able to figure out what you should make, but it seems that Levi has more cooking knowledge than you when he naturally takes initiative in deciding for the both of you. Of course, he asks you if it’s alright to use any ingredients before he does, but you wave him off every time and tell him that he doesn’t need to keep asking.

You let him guide you throughout everything, listening along as he directs you to chop this, stir that, whatever it is. There isn’t much room for any other conversation, but that’s fine with you.

Dinner gets made quickly enough, and with a pot of blueberry merlot tea between the two of you, you start to eat.

You take a sip of the tea first, though, and you give it a solid 7/10. He does the same, but he gives a 5/10, citing the fact that it doesn’t have caffeine as reason for its lowered rating.

You both take the time now to talk about work, since you weren’t able to earlier on the bus, and conversation flows easily. Talking about the misery of the last workweek makes up for the trouble because it lets you completely let go of any of the anxieties you had about it, and when Levi talks about the hell that is grading college papers, you know he feels the same as you do.

After you’re both done venting about work and your coworkers and your clients and practically everyone else in the world, the topic shifts over to Moblit’s birthday dinner the next day.

“Are you bringing a present?”

He shakes his head. “He’s not a gifts person, never accepts them from anyone.”

You go to cover your mouth to stifle your giggle. “Right, right.”

“How’s that funny?”

“I saw him leaving Hange’s place on Tuesday, he was bringing home a bunch of gifts from them.”

Levi sighs, shaking his head again. “I would say I’m surprised, but I’m not.”

“Does he like sweets? I’d feel awkward showing up without at least that.”

“That’s not a terrible idea, but knowing him, he’s probably going to give it all to Hange.”

“That’s alright, still better than nothing,” you muse, swirling the teacup in your hand. “We could make something together. Maybe you could bring some of it home for Isabel and Furlan, too?”

Levi hums. “If you’re fine with it.”

You nod, going to take another sip of your tea before gathering your now-finished plate and utensils to bring to the sink. You hold out another hand to Levi’s spot at the table, and he shoos your hand away before getting up himself to put his tableware into the sink.

He tries to start washing them, but you gently shove him out of the way before turning on the faucet.

“Remember what we said? No washing dishes at the other person’s place.”

He doesn’t give any contest, but he grabs the small dish towel that hangs on a ring above your sink, and he waits next to you so that he can dry the dishes before putting them away.

The running water is loud enough to fill your relatively small apartment, so neither you nor Levi feel any need to talk. While Levi finishes up with drying and putting your tableware away, you take out your recipe book from one of the upper cupboards.

You check the time on your phone: 7:31 PM.

It's quite late already, so you flip through the pages to try and find something that doesn’t take that long to make. Levi is done with getting everything put away shortly thereafter, and he comes up next to you to watch as you figure out what to make.

“Is there anything he likes in particular?” You ask.

“He likes brownies,” he answers. “Do you know how to make those?”

You look over at him, mock offense on your face. “You think I don’t know how to make brownies?”

He puts his hands up, sarcastically so. “Sue me.”

You shake your head with a smile, and you go to close your recipe book. “I will.” You start heading over to your cabinets to get the ingredients, knowing already what you need. “Could you get some eggs and butter from the fridge? Just take out everything you can find.”

“Yeah.”

Soon enough, there’s a hefty pile of ingredients on your kitchen counter, and now you’re the one directing Levi to do things. You turn on the oven and get the ingredients measured out, but you leave everything else up to Levi.

Brownies are certainly not complicated and you could have very easily just made these on your own, but you still feel happy to be making them with him. He struggles a bit here and there, but he doesn’t give up, which is more than you could say for Hange whenever you’re in these situations with them.

It’s weird. Ordinarily when you teach other people how to bake, they feel more like a hindrance to the process than any help.

You let Levi finish mixing the batter while you get the pans prepared, and you can see a faint smile on his face when he goes to pour it all in.

It warms your heart to know that he’s having fun, even if he doesn’t quite know what he’s doing.

You’ve just finished putting away the dirtied utensils and food scale, so you come over to where he is so you can help scrape off the rest of the batter from the bowl.

You quickly get some star confetti sprinkles from your cabinet to put on top (you know, to make the brownies more birthday-esque, or whatever), and you hand the shaker to Levi once the lid’s off.

After that, you open the oven door for him to slide the pans inside, and you close it once they’re all neatly put in.

Looking over at him now, you laugh when you’re met with a better view of his flour-dusted front. “Can I take a picture?”

“Fuck no,” he scoffs. “How long do they take in the oven?”

You shrug. “40 minutes, give or take.” He looks past you and at the bathroom, and so you assume he wants to wash up. “You can shower, if you’d like.”

“I am never taking a shower here ever again,” he laments. “I’ll just go change back into my work clothes.”

“My shower really isn’t that hard to use, but that's fine,” you tease.

He walks past you and into the bathroom, making sure to stop by at the dining table to pick up his clothes on his way there. You go ahead and get started on washing even more dishes, and you hum to yourself as you scrub them clean.

Levi comes back just in time to grab the drying towel a second time, and he does that next to you while you wash the soap off your arms.

For the rest of the time the brownies bake, you and Levi migrate over to the couch and turn on the TV. Thankfully, you find a decently entertaining episode of Shark Tank to put on, and you and Levi shout at the TV when the contestants pass on offers from the Sharks or when the investors say something stupid.

The oven beeps to tell you that the brownies are ready, so you excuse yourself to go take those out to cool. You’re quick in doing so, and not even three minutes later, you’re back on the couch, screaming at Mark Cuban for passing on an especially cute line of plush animals.

You and Levi spend the next hour or so keeping up with this. Thankfully, all the contestants in this extended episode are incredibly bad at their pitch, so there’s no hard feelings from either of you when practically all of them leave the Tank without any deals.

You doubt that Levi understands the business lingo any better than you do, but you’re glad he finds as much fun in yelling at the screen as you do.

The ending credits roll, and you stretch upwards, yawning. “What time is it?”

Levi checks his watch. “10:15.”

You hum. “Let me get some brownies for you to take home.” You get up from your spot on the couch, and Levi follows closely after you. You grab some cellophane bags, twist ties, and star tags from your cabinet, as well as some disposable gloves for yourself.

You move everything over to the dining table so you can sit while you work, and when you come back with a knife to cut everything, Levi’s there too.

“Can I help?”

You nod with a lazy smile on your face.

“Please.”

You slip on your gloves after giving the bags to Levi, and you carefully go to cut out neat squares from the pans.

“Where’d you learn how to bake?” He asks.

You sigh. “It’s been a while since anyone’s asked me that.”

“Sorry,” he apologizes quickly.

“No, you’re good.” You hum as you reangle your knife to start going in the perpendicular direction. “I don’t know, everywhere? I watched my mom do it as a kid, and I picked it up as a hobby when I was in high school.”

“You didn’t come out of the womb with a whisk?”

You snort. “No, but I might as well have. Could you open a bag for me?”

He does, and you slip in the first brownie.

“Thanks.”

“Did you ever want to be a baker? Not that law isn’t admirable either.”

You nod, careful as you continue putting away brownies. Levi continues holding out bags for you to do it efficiently.

“A little, but I didn’t really consider it when I got older. It’s still fun, though, I like it a lot,” you tell him.

“Evidently.”

You smile, shaking your head. “Yeah, I’m sure.” One of the brownie’s hasn’t been cut properly, so you set that aside for you and Levi to have later. “It’s nice anyway, everyone likes being friends with the baker, so it made socializing easier for me.”

“Had trouble making friends?”

You shrug. “I guess, yeah. I was always busy with school, so I never really went out. Baking just gave me another crutch.”

He nods in understanding. “If it’s worth anything, I don’t think anybody now only sees you as a free baker.”

“Not even Isabel?”

He scrunches his nose and aggressively shakes his head. “Absolutely not, she never fucking shuts up about how much she loves you.”

You laugh. “She’s a sweet kid.”

“Hange used to call you ‘Sugar,’ though. Before we knew your name.”

You cringe. “That’s the name they chose for me? I couldn’t get something cooler?”

He nods nonchalantly. “They would not shut up about how they hit the jackpot getting you as a neighbor because you’d always come over with snacks for them.”

You laugh at the memory. “Yeah, I was still used to baking for groups of people, and I didn’t know what else to do with my leftovers.”

By now, all the brownies have been put into their bags, so you go to throw away your gloves, get the pans in the sink, and come back with two pens to write on the tags. You hand one to Levi, and you tell him to just write whatever he wants for Isabel and Furlan, and you can do the tags for Moblit.

You make sure to put that one misshapen brownie on a plate between the two of you, and while you write, you both take small pieces from it.

“Did Hange ever give me a different name or did they stick with Sugar?” You ask.

“You know them, they never change names for anyone,” he complains. “They say it works anyway, since you’re apparently so sweet.”

“What, you don’t think I am?” You tease. You’re both looking down at your writing so you don’t catch his reaction to that, but he does take a while to respond.

“I never said that.”

The two of you continue writing on the tags in silence, and soon enough, all of them are being looped onto iridescent twist ties. There’s more than enough for Levi to take home with him even after you have a good amount prepared for Moblit, so you have to excuse yourself to grab a bag for him to put his share in.

You hold the bag open for Levi to put everything inside, and you laugh when you see that he’s addressed Isabel and Furlan with curse words instead of their names on his tags. He helps you put Moblit’s share into some boxes that you had leftover from when you made all that shortbread for him a while ago.

You watch as Levi slides on his shoes, and before you can open the door to let him out, you remember he still has your clothes.

“You can just leave the clothes you borrowed here.”

“I don’t mind taking care of it.”

You wave him off. “It’s okay, I’m doing laundry tomorrow anyway.”

“If you say so.” He unloops one of his backpack straps to bring it forward and take out your clothes.

You take them from him. “Yeah.” You go to open the door for him, and he steps out into the hallway.

You bring your hand up to wave goodbye to him, but before you can actually do the motion, he brings his hand up too. You half expect him to grab your hand again, like he did on the bus, or maybe even give you a hi-five, but instead, he swipes at your cheek with his thumb.

Again, it feels warm—comfortable. You almost feel yourself wanting to lean into the touch further, but his hand doesn’t linger on your skin for any longer than it needs to.

He flips his thumb back to you. “Crumb.”

You nervously laugh, rubbing the back of your neck with your already raised hand. “Right, thanks. Get home safe, Levi.”

“You too.”

“I’m sure I will.”

This time, when you watch his figure disappear around the corner of your apartment floor’s hallway, you don’t call after him.

You almost wish you do, only to see his face again before he has to go.

✰

The next day, you feel… confused as you go through the motions of your morning and afternoon. Hange comes over at around 4 to get ready with you, and you manage to fend off the nerves, but they come back again in the car.

For once, you’re grateful their driving is so horrendous. If anything, you’ll just let the feeling of crashing be more paramount than anything else.

Nothing even happened last night. Nothing insurmountable, at least. He went grocery shopping with you, drove you home, you invited him inside to make dinner and dessert with you, and he left.

But the feeling—this one, where you feel so comfortable—you don’t know what to do with it.

It doesn’t have you red in the face. It doesn’t fill your stomach with butterflies. It doesn’t force you to shy away from spending time with him.

If anything, it prompts you to do exactly that. It’s weird. It’s so glaringly different from the attraction you felt in the beginning, when you didn’t know his name and he was just another stranger you saw on the bus once a week.

Do you even have to figure this out? It could very well just be something completely normal, and you’ve been overthinking it this entire time.

Hange suddenly stops the car, which snaps you out of your thoughts. Though you’re grateful for the mental break, you have to grip even harder than you already were on the grip handle above your seat.

“What the fuck, man!?”

They only laugh before going to take their key out of the ignition. “Well, we’re here!”

You shudder before getting out of the car, careful not to forget anything, and the two of you join the others in the waiting area. You’re the last to arrive, courtesy of Hange’s poor driving skills, and you watch as they naturally drift towards Moblit.

Mike and Erwin, upon seeing you and Hange enter, go to the reservations desk to presumably tell them “table for Smith,” and that leaves you and Levi alone with each other. You raise the boxes of brownies you brought with you, and he nods in acknowledgement of it.

“Did Isabel and Furlan like them?” You ask, unsure of what else to talk about.

“They liked them too much,” he whines. “Begged me for the recipe and everything.”

“I don’t have one written down, but I can do that on a napkin while we wait for our food,” you offer.

“That’d be nice,” he says. You nod, and then your group of six are guided by a hostess.

The rest of the night is a whirlwind, spurred by Hange’s excitement to celebrate their boyfriend’s birthday with their other friends present. You hand Moblit his brownies, and like the saint he is, he thanks you before splitting it up between everyone at the table. You, Levi, and Erwin refuse them, but he insists that he’d rather share than have to take so many of them home.

You aren’t able to write out the recipe on a napkin as promised because the napkins are fabric, but after figuring out the measurements for a more… manageable batch, you text the information to Levi.

Levi does actually call over the waitress to bring over paper napkins for you, just like when you both came here on Valentine’s Day, and you thank him before starting to tear at the paper. You hand that one to Levi, and instead of rejecting it like you expect him to, he takes it and waits for you to make yours so he can follow along again.

When the food eventually comes to your table, all six of you can do is eat in silence to savor the expensive taste as well as you can. There’s no drinking tonight, probably because everyone drove here in smaller groups and it’d be too inconvenient to figure out how to get home, but it’s still lively and exciting.

Towards the end of the night, you and Hange slip away to “the bathroom” to tell the waitress that it’s Moblit’s birthday and to pick Erwin’s credit card, and when you come back, you both have to act surprised when the whole restaurant starts singing Happy Birthday and when Erwin gets fucked by the expensive bill.

Levi seems to catch on that you’re responsible for Erwin losing the roulette, but he only rolls his eyes and doesn’t make a scene out of it.

When everything’s paid for and everyone’s back outside, just about ready to part ways for the night, Hange winces.

“What’s wrong?” You ask.

They nervously go to scratch behind their ears. “Do you think you could find another ride home? I totally forgot to tell you, but I’m going over to Moblit’s to, uh,” their gaze drifts off to their not-so-secret lover, “test some liquor!”

You should’ve expected as much, but it’s no trouble.

Get some, Hange!

You wave them off, and you look around at the group. “I’m sure least one of them have a seat to spare.”

They wrap you in a warm hug, nearly crushing you, and you return the gesture with just as much enthusiasm. “Thank you, thank you, thank you! I love you so much!”

You try to wiggle out of their grip after a while, but they don’t really let up, instead rocking back-and-forth with you still in their arms.

Their grip on you finally loosens up when Levi comes up to you, and he practically has to pry them off of you before they let go. You thank him, and Hange’s off to go… test liquor with Moblit, the two of them headed for where Hange parked their car.

Erwin chimes in first. “Mike and I live in the opposite direction, so you can go with Levi.”

“Is that okay with you?” You ask him.

Instead of answering, Levi goes to stomp (lightly) on your toes, and you take that as a yes.

You and Levi give your goodbyes to the other two men, and you follow him to his car.

This sure does feel like a repeat of Valentine’s Day. It's parked in the exact same spot.

When you’re both in the car and about ready to leave, he hands you the receipt, telling you that Erwin forgot to take it before he left. You thank him for the paper, and you promptly start tearing and folding it.

The ride is completely silent, again, with only the sound of crinkling paper filling the vehicle, but it’s comfortable. Almost alarmingly so.

You drop the stars into the palm of Levi’s hand when he’s parked at the curb of your building, he reaches over to put them away in his glove box, and nothing is said other than a “get home safe” from the both of you.

When you get safely inside your apartment, you don’t even know what you’re supposed to do.

At least when you were constantly anxious and high-alert around Levi, you could at least find reason to denounce those feelings and get rid of them.

Maybe you should ask Erwin to give you extra work this week to distract yourself.

Who are you kidding, you definitely aren’t going to do that.

Still, when you go to sleep that night, you wish for more opportunities to skip on thinking about it entirely, and even more opportunities to just enjoy the feeling while it’s there.

✰

Both fortunately and unfortunately, your wish is granted to you.

Unlike last week, this week is fast. It rushes past you, works you as hard as it can, and spits you out without so much as a “thank you” for your efforts.

Erwin, bless his heart, apologizes profusely and comes by your office often to check up on you, but you barely spare him a glance whenever he passes through.

The only silver lining in any of this is that Friday comes just as quickly. That and the fact that the hustle and bustle doesn’t give you any time to overthink any of your feelings.

When you go to take your seat on bus 143 at 3:09 PM on Friday, you have to put your head down after you hand Levi his tea. You ask for another rain check, and Levi doesn’t make any fuss about it before taking out his phone to busy himself.

Unfortunately, because there’s a lot of traffic on this particular Friday, there’s plenty of starts and stops, all of which break you out of your resting state. The sounds of city bustle don’t help either. When the bus comes to a sudden halt for what feels like the hundredth time in the last ten minutes, you groan and lean your head back, looking up at the ceiling.

You chuckle halfheartedly. “Maybe I should just jump out the window and walk the rest of the way home.”

Levi scoffs next to you. “We’re still in the city, you might as well stay here until Monday.”

“That’d be better than getting shaken awake every three seconds.”

“You were sleeping?"

“I wasn’t, but I can’t really rest with the traffic. My briefcase isn’t the most comfortable thing in the world either.” You sigh and prop your elbow on your lap, resting your head on your hand. “So, how was your week? We might as well talk if I can’t keep my eyes closed.”

He doesn’t say anything, so you naturally turn to look at him. He’s propping up his backpack straighter on his lap, and he slides his phone into the front pocket.

He turns to look at you when that’s done, and the two of you hold eye contact before he looks away and out the window in front of your seats.

“You can rest on my shoulder.”

You lazily shake your head. “No, it’s okay. That’s probably uncomfortable for you, and you seem tired enough from work.”

“You literally look like you’re about to fall forward,” he scolds. “And no talking, you need to rest.”

“Geez, you make it sound like I’m sick or something,” you joke.

“Picked it up from you,” he contests.

You follow his gaze out towards the window, and you hum. “But it’s okay, I can stay up.” As if on cue, you have to yawn, and you can see Levi shake his head out of the corner of your eye.

Before you can bark out something to dismiss any further scolding, you hear him turning towards you again. You wait, still staring out the window, but you watch as his left hand reaches over to push your head gently onto his right shoulder.

It feels awkward, honestly, and you kinda want to laugh.

You’d think the touch was romantic, but it hardly is when he struggles to reach over the backpack in his lap and your briefcase, and the bumps of the roads that knock you back-and-forth hardly do anything to help the atmosphere either.

But still, the act has you breaking out into a shy smile.

Had it been months ago, you probably would’ve passed out then-and-there from just his touch alone, but you don’t feel any red creeping up at all.

Just a quiet, comfortable glow in your chest, and a smile that acts as a silent thanks to him for lending you his shoulder for the rest of the ride.

He pulls his hand away from your head, and he reorients himself to look outside again, and he sits up straight against the back of the seat. You don’t dare move your head away, instead just slightly turning to look at his face, and you close your eyes once you see that he's comfortably settled back into his seat.

“So, how was your—”

“Just shut the fuck up,” he mumbles.

You sleepily hum. “You like silencing women?”

He groans. “Fuck off.”

You laugh and shake your head, position permitting. You close your eyes, and you hum to yourself as you try to find your sleep.

Yeah, you can figure out your feelings later.

You know you definitely shouldn’t be continuing to put off the emotionally daunting task, but you definitely don’t want to confront anything right now.

You still think it’s weird, that much hasn’t changed. And this is definitely not normal. That much is apparent, more so now than before when you were first starting to question things halfheartedly.

All you need to know is that here, with him, you’re comfortable.

For you, it’s enough to know that. Even if it isn’t, you’re okay with not knowing anything else, so you'll just spend the next... however many minutes left of your ride through the traffic, with him, trying to imprint the comfort that he gives you into yourself as well as you can.

✰

Next Chapter

[misamzy]

i think it’s fun to torture my boyfriend by telling memories of times i’m with him but i honestly started it bc i just have to learn to get things from my head into writing. so here’s another memory that i love and cant stop thinking about!

prom 2022

the last dance.

the song was Speechless by Dan & Shay.

i suddenly became conscious of everything i could hear, see, and feel. i could hear everyone talking and i could see all the lights and people. i could feel my dress and the shorts i had on under it. i could feel my glasses and

—oH shit i forgot to put deodorant on. can other people tell? do they know i have swim shorts under my dress? can they tell i hate my hair right now? ok i’m holding his arm now and he’s taking me to the dance floor. can he hear me thinking? can he actually read my mind? i hope i don’t step on his toes.—

all my thoughts were silenced when we stopped walking and he held my hand to dance.

his eyes are so pretty.

—don’t kiss him yet. not yet. not yet.—

the song was really loud. the speakers were turned up way too much. it’s hard to hear anyone you’re trying to have a conversation with.

he told me outright that he likes me.

—he sAID IT HE HSAID IT HESAIS IT HEGSAID IAJSVKSHDVDKSV……….am i smiling too much? what if i accidentally say something he doesn’t like? what if i’m not remembering correctly about this thing i’m telling him? what if he starts to ask if we’re official? what if—

my thoughts are cut short again by the feeling of his hand on my waist pulling me a little closer. we were already close as it was. he pulled me closer.

—is it weird if i lay my head on his shoulder? we just confessed (obvious) feelings for each other. is it too soon? the song isn’t long enough for my taste. i want to just stay here forever. this feeling right here. right now—

abruptly, yet right on time, the song comes to an end and before i knew it we were walking off the dance floor. i was still smiling. he looked really happy too.

—agnes. agnes. i need to find agnes. i need to tell her. i need to hug her. i’m very happy. i need her to know.—

i couldn’t find her and i had to wait till the next day to even see her.

going to bed that night was like torture yet also very welcome. torture bc i had to leave him but welcome bc i was so exhausted from dancing.

i fell asleep at 2am ish with butterflies still flying around my stomach and head.

[gayspock]

SORRY MY READ MORE DIDNTWORK

so heres the thing yeah

ive been wanting more civilian content. however with this ep i feel like... whenever bsg does actually DO try to do it... i dont like it. LOL.

granted, its not often enough for me to really make a call on it ubt like- i dont know. im thinking of this instance, and the other instances they've involved civilian issues and like... i just have always kinda not vibed with it and..

honestly? you KNOW what i think it might be. i think it might be a case of like... i just feel like the show itself ironically has a bit of a disdain for them. do you know what i mean? i feel like when we do get to see the civilian side of things, its always as either as an a) aside to the main show or b) an inconvenience, and rarely an interesting one - not something it actually wants to explore in much depth. all the people that show up are kind of weird caricatures. the problems they bring up are kind of belittled - and not just by ppl like tigh, but kind of written off by the show itself.

which again- i call ironic because half the time theyre trying to emphasise the importance of the civilian fleet and their rights. but like... the show doesnt really take them that seriously? or present them as such???? like i think zarek is also kind of like the bigger example im thinking of here, and one of the weaker parts of the show. he's pretty much representative of all of the issues with them.

though granted OMG that- that fr sounds like im being negative as hell but gosh it might just be this episode because real talk i havent rlly actively disliked any (i found that one where ellen was introduced weird, but i didnt hate it) but oh this one sucks LOL

and again going back to that thing i said- its not even about the damn civilians. this is like.... all about apollo, really?? and going on a little side quest with him that hardly makes sense?? and can i be real? i dont HATE him i dont but like... i just dont give a shit about him. LOL. SORRY. i think i liked him in the miniseries but since then i havent really cared. he's boring me. and shit- i thought maybe, after he was vented into space, i might kind of develop an interest in him as he struggled with the fallout from that but like uhm

no ... sorry...... this is not how you endear me to him. LOL.

like what even is this... why are we giving him all these women to screw & screw over... i dont care.... and again this whole civilian plot is stupid as helllllll... like. i BELIEVE fully there's horrible shit going on in the civilian fleet- and i wanna see it properly, and explore that not like.. go on some weird murder mystery, involved with the mob... 😭and why did you kill the other pegasus bloke. i kinda liked him . THIS IS SUCH A SHAME I USUALLY LOVE IT WHEN A SHOW LIKE THIS TRIES TO GENREBEND . AND AGAIN WHY IS LEE EVEN THE ONE DOING THIS HELP THIS IS SO MESSY

especiaalllyyyy with the dodgy attempts at flash forward/flash backwards and the filters. sorry i HATE poorly used flash sequences like that - they for real give me the ick... theyre sooo clumsy even normally but here it's like 100x worse bc half of them are about nothinggggggggggg .... stop trying to be cleverrr come on you dont have to do that. kiss me instead?

bu tbh i feel like bsg might just not have the flexibility to genre bend like this. going back to that other episode i didnt like (tigh me up, tigh me down? i think?) i remember i felt like they were trying to be funny but it just came off as weird LOL and poorly done

and thats fine tbh it doesnt have to beit can just do what it does best and do it well but omg help... guyyssssss, get a grip!

anyway im gonna go finih the spidoe i just couldnt not say anything help. honestly. i cant even fault it though because like this is the first one i havent rlly liked at all . and tbh most other shows ive watched will have a load of clunkers so eh. shrug.

i will say i do hope they properly explore lee more after this bc like i said i was kinda interested in really honing in his mental state so we can get #real with the guy but i also hope we dont have to carry too much of whatever the hell else is going on here forward bc its like i dont careeee about his women why on earth

like also yeah why on earth has none of this ever come up like ok granted we dont just sit everyone down and chat like that but it just feels weird like im not talking abt his sudden shift in attitude like fuck.again i'd be ok with them exploring like. onset depression or whateber the issues are post being vented from the blackbird .BUT his girlies im so confused like if he has such a significant relationship whys it just never...... ok whatever....... ok

[ipoddymouth]

Wait bestie I want to know your thots on the matty healy being problematic thing he’s said a lot of weird/offensive stuff for sure but apparently some of that stuff is supposed to be satirical/ he’s an edge lord or whatever like the n*zi salute thing he did and it’s not a good thing to do no matter the context but I feel like it’s probably more harmful to call him a n*zi when he isn’t actually one it’s probably better to call that action antisemitic than a whole n*zi no?

wait gjargigjag you just basically summarized my thoughts but imma ramble more under the cut

i dont think matty is actually, truly, deep in his core racist or a n*zi (i'm also p sure he's given enough interviews explaining himself and his political ideologies bc he's annoying and never shuts the fuck up) BUT he also does say a bunch of shit on the side that doesn't help his case.

i think intent is a big issue in society in general bc it's like 'are you saying this shit to be funny? or are you saying this shit to be mean?' and people don't ask that question anymore. i remember when ariana dated pete and he made that joke about manchester and people were like 'he's disrespecting the dead!!' and, like, i can defs see where people are coming from for sure, and i can also see why he was like ???? in response to the backlash because his attention clearly wasnt to offend.

i will not lie and will fully admit that i am SENSITIVE lmao and there are some jokes in standup sets that i will straight up 😐 during bc i cannot separate the words from intent sometimes but im not going to say bill burr is a rape apologist or whatever because i sit and watch my silly lil 'offensive' robot chicken episodes without batting an eye. the problem with humor is that there will always be a faction that makes certain people uncomfortable. and that's okay!!!! not all of us (me included) need to watch cumtown or red scare because we will not find it funny!!! there's one drag queen who's yt videos my boyfriend cant watch bc he thinks she comes across mean even though i think the jokes hit!!!!

and to your second point i agreeeee like im black and grew up in a p white area so obviously people have said some SHIT to me, but that means you have to learn how to distinguish between someone being intentionally racist or someone being ignorant. i think matty says shit he thinks is funny because he's trying to be funny but the jokes themselves don't hit and just come across as....bizarre? rude??? multiple -ists???? but then he tries to explain himself and people (strangers to him) are either like 'fuck u this isnt sincere' or are just like 'but youre still wrong and horrible' and he just gets frustrated and deletes his socials in a lil baby fit gjlragjaglgj. and not to be a white apologist lmao BUT i kinda do understand why people turn to that 'anti-woke ideology' bc if every time i said something with poor phrasing and someone i didn't know called me a racist n*zi i'd probs go ape shit too.

there are real, actual n*zis like in real life who are actually trying to hurt people and people are pulling out all of their big gun ultra-bad labels for some scrawny boy band dude???? like what are we supposed to call the actual n*zis???????? like i l i t e r a l l y have seen a neo-n*zi rally down the street from my HOUSE and thats fucking TERRIFYING and they're just snatching up more people because of all of the culture wars bullshit

[but like to note im not saying that people need to be forgiving and understanding every time someone says something that pisses them off. some people need to be yelled at!!! they need to know they are wrong!!!! people should just be aware of the impact their words have. matty's words have made A LOT of people straight up hate him, but at the same time, some people have probably seen matty get called a n*zi and are now like 👀 bc the bar to being considered h*tler seems kinda low.]

anyway tl;dr racism is a spectrum, words have meaning, and we don't know these people. but if matty really is a racist and im wrong then i hope he chokes!!!

ALSO i am an adult and am not in the business of defending other adults so like im not gonna argue with someone if they think matty is racist. i am not doing dirty hit pr for FREE

[midnightmisadventures]

Okay lets play fair and give edward some points

Cause we all know who Bella ends up with

Okay so i need to bring you up to speed on 2 dreams ig

Dream 1:

I was doing my usually dreaming at high school bs and at the end of the day trying to find my bus. It was foggy and rainy and dream dark so I go to the bus I think is mine, and i dont realllyyy recognize the bus or driver but i also hadnt been in a long time and wasnt confident what i remembered. Basically i asked the guy what number it was and he dream mumbled and said "seats 11, blank and blank) are available vibes.

So im still not sure, but i start walking down the isle to the empty seat and then i get to it, and sitting in the one across is Liam. And as i approach we just look at eachother like...uhhh somethings wrong cause we do not share a bus.

He was wearing the famous blue hoodie and it was scrunched around his face. And i said "well, if youre here im definitely on the wrong bus" and he was like "yeaaaaa.....your prob on the wrong bus" but not in a mean way.

So i quick decide, im gonna leave while i still can. Seeing liam is a funny gag but i just want to get home so id rather be on the right bus.

So i turn around to get off and Liam starts going "wait wait wait, arielle" its now that i see he's sitting in his seat with another girl.

The girl is ...... hawkins....like the chocolate. But regardless i turn back around and he's motioning me to come back. And i go like "what?"

And he says "hey, if the bus driver hasn't said anything i wouldn't leave" basically saying "if you havent gotten caught why leave?" which isnt what i was worried about btw. I just wanted to be on the correct bus home. But liam was phrasing it as, like "aww cmon stay, itll be fun, no ones making you leave"

So fine.

I sit down in the seat next to him. And he seems to be happy about it. So we're riding and i think we're doing small talk. But he's also actively bantering with hawkins and im like.....why did i impulsively stay on this bus to be near him if hes with another bitch. Like i didnt notice who she was till too late?

So theyre like playfully bickering. Like not even flirting bc they were already together.... And i hear her be like "uh you cant do that, i LIVE with you, thats so inappropriate, your girlfriend lives with you you cant do that"

I have no idea WHAT he couldnt do, or what they were talking about. But they were joking around and now i knew that they were not only together but hawkins livesss with him.

But then Liam sort of comes over to my seat and starts talking to me again, sort of making jokes. And im trying to not be weird bc he clearly has a girlfriend so even if i did want to be close to him i felt like i couldnt.

But now he's like super close to me, i cant ignore him, he's being sweet and playful and cute. He evenutally, puts his bag on my lap and sprawls out laying on me. Like lays on my lap like he's gonna take a nap.

And i was like he's so cute, but is this crossing a line? Like i can't caress him or play with his hair or feed into this right? His gf is RIGHT there.

So after a little i feel like he could tell i wasnt reciprocating like, he was expecting me to hug on him and play with his hair but i wasnt. But also it mattered that i wasnt like "get offfa me" when he layed on me. Like i was fine with him laying on me and smiled and giggled but i thought it be to far to cuddle him.

And he noticed i wasnt biting so he sat up.

Around then i noticed hmmm, omg is that joel and chris and jake and brighton?? type beat. Like is that christian c**v**t.

So im realizing omg wait is this bus 99? Which isnt technically my current bus but i do know this route i should be able to figure out when to get off. Even if i get off a chip i can uber home.

But honestly im shocked, it wasnt even just bus people it was just highschool people and.....yea most of them were guys.

But i was confused because why was LIAM here. He was never "on my bus"

But suddenly im more comfortable, like wait i know A LOT of these people. I have to know more than him? Like this is actually my territory not his. He doesnt have homecourt advantage....he just has a girl.

And he wasnt.....rubbing hawkins in my face. But cmon im human he's living with his girl and theyre giggling like an old married couple like i WAS jealous.

So i turn around and see christian/donald h****n and im like "hey i thought i was on some random bus, and now i see all of you guys thats wild is this my same bus from before"

like explaining omg i used to be on here i think? or at least i know a lot of these guys used to be on my bus so i know what neighborhoods we're going to.

So im like trying to catch up with Donald and figure out whats going on here. I also wasnt flirting but it felt good to know like...at least i have friends i can talk to and pretend to look cool. Im not isolated and liam wont think im a loser.

But Donald says.....i dont even know how to describe it lol. Donalds like "yea but...i don't even think we utilized our time together, like we didn't kiss, did we?

And...your guess is as good as mine. He was also being so cheeky about it, like "wait we didnt right?....*blushes* i dont even remember us kissing once >.<"

As if thats the bare minimum, how could we not have even done that? we really wasted our time together

But....i've never- , like it was Donald H****n!!!

So immediately im like "no no, thats not what i meant" kinda blushing kinda giggling uncomfortbly lol. Cause like im flattered really but no we never kissed and its not like i asked you if we ever made love lmaoooo like im not talking about that

I also remember being concious that Liam was in earshot and was like oooh i wonder what he's thinking, he must think im a popular hottie. But i dont have confirmation that he heard

Lots of symbolism i know....

Anyway, there isnt much else.

At one point we stopped somewhere and Liam said like "arielle, do this this and this here and theyll help you get home" and it was actually really sweet of him. I remember being grateful that he went out of his way to help me navigate cause he didnt have to....and i was confused where his head was at with me and......karmic. Lol it is not even worth it to call hawkins karmic. SHe didnt even earn that title.