#is that I got to witness what happens when you don’t break the cycle

[batwynn]

About 9 hours ago my mom looked at me and said she’d never even imagine saying the things her mom said to her. This is after 3-5 years of me gently breaking down the abuse she’s been through for her entire life at the hands of her parents, and also-gently reminding her that she broke the cycle of abuse. I’d always have to go a bit sideways at it, like approaching a feral cat, because no one wants to be bludgeoned over the head with such a thing. She’s been so hurt, for so long, and it’s so complicated because of course she loves them. She’s been grieving the people she loved and thought she knew, grieving the death of her father, filled with guilt for not being able to help him more than she already did (and not recognizing that she did literally everything she could for him, including but not limited to putting her life on the line for him) and grieving very little for herself.

So for her to say that out loud to me is… huge.

She also was full fever brain after a covid booster so I don’t know if that will stay with her or if she’ll fever-forget but I need to find a way to acknowledge it better today than my tired-brained ‘yeah, because you were never the asshole even when they kept trying to convince you that you were’ from last night.

Anyway, I just wanted to share this as a reminder: it doesn’t matter if it takes a long time to come to terms with your abuse. It sucks, because you deserve to have your abuse recognized and start healing asap. But you’re not faking it, it did happen, and it was not ‘not that bad’ just because it took time for you to recognize the abuse. Sometimes it takes 50+ years, and it’s almost never linear. Five days from now she will be sure that she was the problem once again because that’s what she’s been told her entire fucking life. And it’s fine. It’s ok. I’ll remind her of the truth as many times as I need to. Healing is complex, and weird, and hard. Give yourself the grace and patience your abusers never granted you.

[eamour]

don't rush the process.

this is a post that goes out to all the people who currently have this "i need to have it now!! what‘s the fastest way??" mindset. i am telling you now that you do don’t need to rush the process. yes, you will get all of your desires. no "what if's", no "but's" — you have the ability to make your life beautiful and you will do that, regardless of how much time it might take you.

feel free to take your time.

actually, time doesn’t exist. hence the concept of the multiverse and parallel realities happening in this moment where you experience time very differently (in one reality you are a 13 year old, in one you are 45, in the other a day is 75 hours long, or in one reality an hour is 30 minutes long, and so on), time isn’t linear. it really pretty much is relative (einstein, our lord and saviour).

step by step.

take in the information, one by one. reorganize your thoughts and spend some time maybe facing and analyzing them. why do you have these thoughts? what makes you feel that way? try to get down to the roots of the issue.

you can organize thoughts by maybe writing them down. by maybe talking to someone about it. or maybe even talking to yourself. the main point of this is that you stop keeping negative thoughts to yourself. you might not be aware of it, but trying to not think of bad things doesn’t necessarily mean that you stop persisting in them. that’s not how a mental diet works. you face the issue, you comprehend it, and then you go against it. after you have witnessed a possible undesirable outcome, you can choose to declare it as false. — as in "it will simply not happen!", "nah, not true" or "this is so wrong". that’s when you start to persist in the outcome that you want to manifest or at least stop persisting in an assumption that you dislike, fear or hate.

take a break, if you want.

if you ever feel overwhelmed by all the information you think you might have overconsumed, take a step back and let yourself breathe. let your thoughts flow through your mind and just calm down, take a break. sometimes we need to slow down before we can continue again. sometimes you really just need to collect yourself and become aware of the intrusive thoughts you are having that just become louder and louder the more you try to force manifesting. it’s up to you to recognize that and to decide to give yourself some rest. there is nothing wrong with mentally resting and it’s definitely not something to be ashamed of. on the other hand, i think it might be very necessary at times. people who have a goal and who want to achieve it no matter what within the shortest amount of time often refuse to take breaks and just become entirely unavailable for a pause. and i understand that very well. but a break doesn’t have to be tiring. it doesn’t mean that you don’t get to do anything and force yourself even more to not think of anything unfavourable. taking a break means to allow thoughts, even negative ones, instead of forcefully pushing them away and trying to ignore them although you can’t seem to stop persisting in them. sometimes we encounter undesirable thoughts and they keep reappearing and sometimes we just need to let it happen. trust me, you aren’t taking steps backwards or erasing your progress. you are simply observing your thoughts instead of reacting to them right immediately.

you are already doing just fine.

there is simply no reason to rush all of this. no one expects you to have your desires and be a perfect runway model with a penthouse by next week. you are the only person in your life that can dictate yourself what to do, that can grant you your wishes, that can console and understand you… be empathetic with yourself. some people put such immense pressure on themselves, it’s really not doing you any good. yes, i totally get it. you want to have your desires as soon as possible, you might wanna show off, just break out of this cycle and show the world what you got. i know you want to prove it to yourself and maybe even the people around you as well. but you are perfect no matter what. you are a winner no matter what. you don’t need to manifest all of your desires right away and be a genius at persisting. you already manifest at all times, no one is going to judge your progress. and the same way you don’t need to "earn" the title "master manifestor". the fact that you are you, the main character, the only person in your reality that can manifest, makes you a master already. you have no one to compare yourself to other than yourself.

with love, ella.

[who-knew-a-sheep-can-write]

Nightlife: Werewolf!Elliott x Fem!Reader (NSFW)

Pookie bear you read my mind >:)

Vampire this, merman that. Where are MY NEEDS met? I gotta do everything myself >:(

Contains: Brief werewolf transformation, werewolf sex, mating cycles, rutting, creampie, rough sex, oral sex, a little bit of blood, breeding

It was always a miracle to behold.

At first, when you found out nearly two years ago, it was something that would dawn mortifying horror onto anyone who witnessed it. Hell, you nearly fainted watching it all happen, backed against the rinky wall of the seaside cabin at what unfolded before your very eyes.

But now? It elicited excitement right down to your very core.

Even now, as it happened before you, you found yourself growing wetter by the second as you watched it happen before your very eyes.

You were both holed up in the cellar, housed in a special little room in the far back beyond the casks of aging wine you had built under the false pretenses of protection should a tornado rip through the valley. Robin was skeptical when you came to her about it, stating that tornados really don’t come around this side of the valley until a small twister took out a farm in Grampleton. It was safe to say you had a special “bunker” for said emergencies.

Your current definition of emergency was so much more different.

The room laid mostly bare save for a hanging lightbulb, a small dresser by the door and the bed you were currently laying on. There was nothing else here, there was nothing else to distract you from what was happening before your very eyes.

Your husband was turning.

It wasn’t spurred on by the moon being at her fullness, but the feral seasonal urges that turn him into a sex crazed animal nearly twice a year, spurred on by that primal need to fill you instead.

The wet and pained noises of his body breaking down and reforming, bones snapping and muscles tearing and the moans that came out of that man. You watched his body twitch and seize, limbs growing strong with bulky muscle as his sunkissed skin quickly became covered with thick fur. You didn’t dare miss a thing, gazing at him with the best bedroom eyes you could muster as the wolfman took form.

They were so much more different than those eyes you wore back then, all fearful and terrified like a deer’s. And when his gaze briefly turned to look up at you with those hauntingly beautiful eyes? You felt your core burning up like your body was starting to go into a complete meltdown.

Despite wearing nothing other than the thinnest of white sheets over your crying cunt, you were sweltering. You needed him so badly it was starting to hurt.

“Elliott,” you cooed, pawing at the sheet and twisting it until your knuckles paled.

He only responded with a snap of his morphing jaws, sharp teeth splitting his gums as he drooled. He clawed at the stone floor, adding in deeper grooves and gashes to the rest of the marks he’s left in here.

He finished up quickly, standing up tall on his hind legs as his claws flexed and ears swiveled, trying to adjust as best as he could to such a quick turn. His eyes blinked open, slit pupils dilating so small they got lost in the sea of green that filled the whites of his eyes. Something lingered in his gaze as he kept you pinned with his stare alone; Something dangerous- something hungry.

It’s odd. Two years ago you were absolutely frightened by him, but now? You were more than ready to be bred by him and carry his children.

And to think this all started when you tried to give him his birthday present early since you knew he would be out of the valley for it. You both were still newly dating, both of you were nothing more than blushing lovebirds blissfully enjoying your honeymoon phase when you walked in on him shackling himself to the wall behind his piano, nearly naked and horribly frightened when he saw you. You watched every bit of it despite him begging for you to leave and to not look at what he was becoming.

And dare you say, you were a bit turned on watching the entire thing.

Your eyes trailed over his body. Across those broad shoulders you could easily fit over, down his trim torso where his pectorals and abs rippled, right to his cut groin with his big cock standing at full attention.

Now it was your turn to drool.

He gave you no time to react, clawed hands swiping the sheet off of your naked person and snatching at your ankles and yanking you toward the edge of the bed. You gasped, nails digging into the mattress only to moan when he split your legs in half. The heat that radiated off of him beat down on your nude cunt as it cried for his attention.

Your husband leaned down, his dog-like nose huffing at your glistening womanhood like he were a bloodhound catching a scent. Snuffling, he inhaled your sweet scent that drove him even more mad, the head of his cock cried with precum.

You suddenly screamed when his slick tongue dove right between your velvety walls, drinking from you deeply as though you were the fountain of youth. You snatched at the cheap headboard, nails digging into the soft wood as it thumped against the brick wall. Elliott fucked you with his tongue, letting the strong and slick muscle dive deep inside of you, lapping at your walls as they tried to squeeze against him, poking at your cervix and making you cry out in pure bliss.

You tasted so good to him. Even when he appears human, he goes on and on about how amazing and how perfect you smell and taste: Like freshly made spice berry jam and savory starfruit wine. Just the thought of eating you out had the man reeling and dragging you to the bedroom.

Even now, Elliott oddly took his time lapping at your cunt, making sure to clean you of all of your dripping arousal. Not that you minded. Your toes curled and the back of your head dug into the soft mattress.

He must’ve decided that simply holding your ankles apart wasn’t a good enough angle for him, the beast dropping them around his shoulders where you lazily locked them behind his head as his hands snatched at your waist. He hoisted you up a bit, dragging you a little more off of the bed until your ass hung off, tilting your core closer to his mouth. Your eyes rolled in the back of your head, mouth hanging open as you cried out Elliott’s name. Your mind went blank for a second as Elliott’s beastly tongue smacked right against that special little spot inside of you, your husband huffing against your cunt as though he were laughing at how easily he could please the love of his life.

You quickly came apart under him, cumming right in his face. The wolfman crooned and snarled, his fangs ghosting over your womanhood, pricking at the delicate skin between your legs as he drank up your sweet sweet cum. It was only when he deemed you clean enough did he drop your hips and allowed you to fall back to the bed. You caught his eyes as he watched on with a primal lust as your breasts bounced.

You knew what he was thinking; How he couldn’t wait for them to be swollen with milk and all. Elliott did have a pretty big breeding kink even before you found out about this side of him.

He gave you almost no time to adjust and catch your fleeting breath before he sank his claws into your hips and flipped you over so you were on your hands and knees, rutting the head of his cock against you. Just the feeling of his blunt tip dragging across your cunt, smearing the thick beads of salty-sweet precum around your aching womanhood sparked new life in your core, erupting something hot to bubble inside of you right behind your belly button.

You braced yourself, squeezing your eyes shut as you prepared yourself for him to enter you.

There was a hefty tap at your passageway he was just violating with his tongue before painful pleasure tore into you. Your head dipped below your shoulders as your arms wobbled and struggled to keep you upright. You gasped, eyes flying open as you openly moaned so loud you swore you would wake up your poor sleeping livestock.

Your cunt squeezed around him, walls forced to stretch around his girth as he sank so deep inside of you, and even then, he couldn’t fully sheath himself inside of you. He huffed and snapped his maw, his broad chest heaved as he tried to get used to how your cunt clamped around him. You were always so tight for him, such a good girl for him.

He started to fuck you slowly.

He worked up the pace eventually, almost like he was still human with how careful he was being. Your husband pistoned his furry hips, his girthy cock slotting so nicely inside of you that you almost didn’t want him to move.

But when he moved, you swore you saw fireworks light up behind your eyelids.

You buried your face in the mattress when he picked up the pace, the headboard smacking against the brick wall with every thrust. Your fists tightened around the sheets so hard they started to tear at the stitches. You whimpered into the bed when you felt his claws sink deeper into your hips, splitting your skin just enough for blood to pearl out and slowly dribble down your hips until the dropped to the ruined sheets.

You could feel your walls still fluttering to fit him, wincing when he would piston his hips in a certain direction that forced your cun to fit him even more. As he mounted you, fucking you from behind, you could feel his balls ghosting over the curve of your ass as your entire body glistened with delicious sweat.

You felt so full, a deep groan bubbled out from your lips as you felt your heart beat through your entire body, matching with the pace at which Elliott fucked you. You kept shuffling, wiggling your ass on purpose as you were forced to spread your legs wider just a bit for support.

You cried out his name, arching your spine just so and throwing your head back as you suddenly came again. Your entire vision went white for a second as he slammed against your cervix, arms collapsing under your dead weight as you gripped the sheets for dear life. Your husband pounded into you like a well-oiled machine, fucking you hard and fast. The goal in his mind never faded from sight: He was going to breed you.

He was going to fuck you all night long, spilling his seed into as many times as it took for your womb to become fertilized. He snapped his jaws and crooned loudly. He didn’t have much more to go and you could feel it. You felt his cock twitch inside of you, growing harder by the thrust. 

“Elliott- AH! Are you-?” your words trembled on your lips. Elliott snarled something vicious, claws sinking in deeper. He moved your hips for you, dragging you nearly off of his cock before slamming you back down as far as you could take him, going the opposite of his thrusts on purpose as to mask his pace faltering. “El- Right there!” you whimpered pitifully. It did wonders for him when you would talk him through his climax, begging and pleading with him as he cums so deep inside of you seemingly sating the beast for the time being. “Fill me up! Please! Ah- Isn’t that what y-you want?” He crooned and huffed, his thrusts growing sloppier. “Cum in me, Elliott. Please. I need you.”

A sudden explosion of warmth hit your insides, your husband tilting his beastly head back as he bayed at the top of his lungs, his howl rattling the house. His hot seed poured into your waiting womb, burying his cock as far as he could into you as rope after rope of his thick seed filled you to the brim. He even hoisted your hips up a bit to make it harder for his semen to dribble out of you, but it always did. You shivered when you felt it start to run down your cunt and drip onto the rumpled and ruined sheet.

You both stayed like that for a good few minutes before Elliott let go of you. You once again bounced against the mattress, a choked gasp left you when your womanhood was suddenly left empty, allowing the rest of his seed to gush out of you and onto the bed. You shivered, whimpering when Elliott gave you an experimental lick up your spine to taste at your sweat before you felt him move you onto your back.

You weren’t surprised to see his cock was already stiffening with life once more. He gripped onto one of your ankles again, lifting it up and draping it over his shoulder as he leaned down to lick another stripe against you, savoring how you tasted on your belly this time. You didn’t know which you wanted more: To go through this again during his next mating cycle or to get pregnant from this one. As you weighed the options, you were shocked out of your thoughts when Elliott rutted his cock against your precious bundle of nerves.

“Wait-” you panted, swallowing the spit that pooled at the bottom of your mouth. “Wait, wait, wait! I need a minute, Elliott, wai-”

You suddenly screamed, back arching off of the bed as he reseated himself inside of you, stretching you out once again as he bayed.

[linkspooky]

oh mannn that cycle meta got me thinking (I love your metas btw) since the story is slowly wrapping up do you think that the story is going to end on a “the cycle is broken” note or more like… “the cycle is destroyed” note? I mean the whole jujutsu system is not only made up of the higher ups, it also consists of the big three jujutsu families, the zen’ins, the Kamos and the Gojos as Megumi mentioned in the goodwill event arc and they all desperately try to uphold the current system and keep the toxic cycle going, but I’ve been wondering… cause I don’t think killing kenny and sukuna is going to solve the entire problem (like at least to me these two are just using and toying with the current system. they don’t really seem to care about it, since they have their own plans) and now… well since maki annihilated the entire Zen’in clan, and THEN gojo (at least it was implied it was gojo, but who knows) killed the higher ups maybe there’s a pattern forming lolol so that only leaves the Kamos and the Gojos, so assuming once they’re gone (along with the heian boomers)… would that break/end the cycle? I mean I don’t think playing safe politics would ever work or really change anything, because the system only cares about upholding itself, so the only way to end is to completely destroy it..?.. but I don’t know

I'm not actually sure about whether or not the system is going to be truly broken by the time the manga is over, because you yourself said that both the higher ups and the Zen'in Clan have been purged now by someone slaughtering them, but... that's the exact kind of slaughter that Gojo was speaking out against and said would not work in the first ten chapters. For Gojo to suddenly approve of slaughter and the story to take that route in the end game is just odd.

We have not seen the fallout of Maki killing the Zen'in Clan and if there is actually going to be any consequences from that in-story, or if Gojo's even heard the news of that happening so it's hard to comment on that event.

However, we have witnessed the immediate result of the slaughter of the higher ups. ALl that ends up happening is Gojo places Gakuganji in charge instead, someone corrupt enough to organize an assassination of Yuji, and who killed Yaga under orders with no consequences.

Which is what Gojo warned of earlier in the first ten chapters, that if someone did bother to slaughter the higher ups, then the people who replaced them would not be much better. I'm going to borrow from some tags @hxhhasmysoul put on a post of mine.

Gojo wanted to raise strong and intelligent allies who would replace him as the next generation and a better alternative to the previous generation that's still currently in charge and holding onto power by sacrificing the youth.

However, he didn't raise them to do political reform of think for themselves about how things could be better, he raised them to be Mini-Gojos. Gojo's students for the most part do not look at Jujutsu Society as a whole, and use might makes right as justification for their actions. Gojo's students have declared on multiple occasions that they don't care whether or not what they're doing is right or wrong.

Gojo's students all call themselves cogs in a machine. He hasn't raised a set of political reformists, he's raised a set of kids who are all individually very strong, and also loyal to him. Which is like the underyling motivation of Gojo's goals all along of going with education to raise up pupils, he was always going to do this, just replace whoever was in charge with people he handpicked. Gojo's students not really caring that much about reforming the system isn't really a flaw in Gojo's plan, it's a feature.

Which is why when Gojo is sealed in the box, his students don't even try to defeat Kenjaku or Sukuna, their only goal is to get him out and let him take care of everything. Gojo's students are all ultimately loyal to Gojo's agenda because he raised them to be that way.

If Gojo dies against Sukuna however, it will show that Gojo's methods have failed and the main characters will have to scramble to find some other way of dealing with the problem. They'll no longer have "Just get Gojo out of the box" as the magical key to their problems. If there is going to be a big change in the story, it's probably going to be pushing things away from Gojo's individualist mindset. When Hakari is convinced to come with Yuji, Kirara mentions that despite hating the higher ups Hakari's always felt a strong connection to the people at Jujutsu High.

THe only reason that Gojo came out of the box in the first place, is a weak person who Gojo would write off as a random extra, saved Kurusu when she was falling off a building when all of his super strong students absolutely failed in that situation.

The most toxic attitude of sorcerer society is that individual strength means everything. Gojo hates the collectivism and tradition that requires people to continually sacrifice themselves for the collective good that keeps the higher ups in power, but collectivism isn't always a bad philosophy the same way that individualism isn't always good, they can both be taken to toxic extremes. The higher ups maintain their power through toxic ideas of collectivism requiring the sacrifice of others. Whereas Gojo's faction is the toxic extreme of individualism, which is why Maki, and then either Gojo or Yuta went on a murder spree with the elders. The true advancement from the toxic ideas of sorcerer society would be finding a balance between those two.

Which is probably where the real challenge in the manga is going to come, where Gojo's individual philosophy fails him and he gets either defeated, or just eaten by Sukuna and the kids finally have to learn how to function as a group instead of a loose collection of individuals. If Jujutsu Society is destroyed effectively by the end, then it's likely Gojo their biggest and most useful cog in that machine will perish alongside of it to make room for all of his students.

[monstersinthecosmos]

okay so i just finished IWTV....... oh my god!!! oh my god. it's embarrassing how insane this book made me. for the last 50 pages or so i was regularly taking breaks to run laps around my apartment like a lunatic because i physically could not handle all the pain and angst and despair coursing through my body LOL. i got so immersed in the story i forgot pretty much all of the background for armand you'd given me (and i can't remember most of it even now!!! my mind is in shambles) and still, very organically...... he became my favorite. even despite all of the. you know. and maybe even more so BECAUSE of it. i've just never witnessed an evil so heartbreaking!!!!!!!!!!? THE ABSOLUTE DEVOTION?????? DERANGED AND UGLY AND UTTERLY BEYOND REASON????!!!! FUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!! i'm sorry for vomiting all over your inbox i genuinely cannot conjure up any resemblance of coherence atm!!! THANK YOU FOR POINTING ME TOWARDS SUCH LUXURIOUS PAIN i LOVE it i want MORE! <3 <3 <3

oh my god OH MY GOd ,... omg... 🥹🥹

WELCOME WELCOME YES THIS HOW I FEEL EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE I WISH I KNEW WHERE TO EVEN START 

(I really feel like just answering with this meme and not subjecting you to a wall of text but I'LL TRY !!!)

GOD LIKE WHAT THIS BOOK DOES SO SO WELL AS LIKE IMMEDIATELY GROUND FLOOR OF THE SERIES LETS US ALL KNOW THAT ALL CHARACTERS COMMIT EVILS AND ARE NOT GREAT PEOPLE BUT THEY ALL WANT TO BE LOVED AND ARE TRYING LOL. 

LIKE LOUIS MOVES FROM ABUSIVE PARTNER TO ABUSIVE PARTNER UNTIL HE’S FINALLY SO DEAD INSIDE THAT HE CAN BE BY HIMSELF AND WALK AWAY.

AND LIKE IT’S SO HARD BECAUSE YOU SEE HOW CLAUDIA FREED HIM FROM LESTAT, AND THEN ARMAND FREES HIM FROM CLAUDIA. AND SOMETHING THAT ALWAYS FUCKS ME UP SO BAD IS THAT ARMAND HAS SUCH A SKEWED MAP OF APPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR BUT HE’S NOT EVIL. HE’S TRYING HIS BEST, IN THE BEST WAY HE KNOWS HOW.

Wait hang on I’ll take caps off I’m so sorry lmfao I’m just really worked up. 

I think there’s a sort of meme-ier version of this like Armand going ���hi 🙂 I killed your daughter 🙂 you can kill all my friends if you want 🙂 I won’t stop you 🙂 do you like me? 🙂"

But it’s actually SO TRAGIC god. Like I read IWTV as a story about domestic abuse and the family cycle, personally, and I see Claudia as an Oedipal figure. Louis is unable to get away from Lestat until Claudia makes it happen, and Claudia winds up being so cold and cruel and he’s stuck with her until Armand frees him. And there’s a lot of conversation about like, Armand being manipulative or what he did to CREATE this, how did he push them both where he wanted them, etc, but the thing that gets me is that when Louis wants to break up, Armand lets him leave.

And like SKIP WHAT I’M ABOUT TO SAY IF YOU DONT WANT A SPOILER BUT LIKE I DID MENTION THIS IN MY OTHER POST  —— but if you read Lestat’s book and get the background on how he and Armand met, it’s sort of the opposite where Lestat destroys Armand’s coven and Armand is so devastated about it, vs 100 years later he ALLOWS Louis to destroy a coven. AND HE GETS THE GUY!!!! In TVL he like BEGS Lestat to be with him and Lestat isn’t interested lol but he gets to keep Louis this time.

IDK IDK IM JUST REAL EMOTIONAL. 

And like !!!!!!!! God idk. If you read more of the books you get so many indications about how people in Armand’s life don’t respect him, and a lot of times people write him off because he looks like a teenager. They don’t take the danger of him seriously, which makes him even more dangerous. But it’s so heartbreaking reading IWTV and seeing how Louis respects him so much, and sees him as wise and calm, and needs him! 

And like maybe Louis is uniquely qualified to not judge people for looking like children because he has spent the last 90 years with a vampire child and respects her as an adult, you know?

If you keep reading you’ll see how much Anne Rice like retcons or how much the continuity flops around so like EVERY book will have a Doylist vs Watsonian conversation like, she never comes out and says that Armand looks like he’s 17 in IWTV and in the later books it’s a huge point every time he’s on the page just HE’S SHORT HE’S 17 HE LOOKS LIKE A CHERUB etc and maybe that’s because she hadn’t decided that yet but also maybe Louis is the only person who fucking respects him. :) 

[mischievous-mayhem-is-upon-you]

Definite Triggers: US E*lection

If you fuck with Trump or if you’re a Canadian conservative leaning towards Poiliere GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY BLOG PERIOD.

After this I won’t post personal rants on politics but I am tired and pissed off and I’m sorry to all of my American friends, followers and mutuals. I am here for you in support.

As a Canadian who’s watched this current election unravel all day/night, this election has to be the most mind boggling thing I’ve ever witnessed.

The amount of people who threw their vote to 3rd party during THIS ELECTION??? Why? What was the fucking purpose for damning the lives around you and very well your own for ANOTHER 4 years with a man who’s unfit for office - who used white supremacy/ racism / sexism to name only a few things? A man who’s only purpose in politics is to blame immigrants, POC, Women, LGBTQ, people with disabilities and the low income / working class for the countries problems when it’s the rich and elite pulling the strings across the country to HURT YOU and privately profiting off of it??

There’s also people coming forward in a panic saying they tossed him a vote because “they thought it would be funny, and didn’t think he would win”. Fuck you, regardless if you think the elected candidates are a joke and would never win (which clearly already happened), if you’re not voting on policies for the betterment of the country and counties/cities you’re in, then don’t fucking vote because it fucking matters. There are states with less than 100 ballots of a difference between Kamala and Trump…LESS THAN 100! Your voice did matter!!

Under “normal” and I’ll say that loosely circumstances I am all for voting on your own personal values for policies on a country wide scale even if it means a vote away from the primary candidates as changes have to start somewhere if you want to see any hope of breaking free from the constant 4 year cycle of typical shit vs shittier…but this was not the fucking time. In the states she needed, those 1-2% third party votes would have changed the outcome in the states she needed to hang on.

I am livid, frustrated and tired of what feels like big project social engineering experiments happening across the country in the USA to see how gullible and malleable the people are. And this is a call for the next 4 years to make yourself HEARD, part take in your local government and help make your local community safer for you and your loved ones.

I am typically apolitical due to family stresses in my own country, but I have watched since the first presidency of Trump, my family loose themselves in to believing this man to be the true saviour of the USA, and the world. I’ve gone from a left wing family many of which who once used to be and still are gay/lesbian/bi, once had friends of many cultures and religions who once said they would vote on the protection of the minority and people who are at harm by big government no longer stand by that practice and are actively looking to vote conservative which is now forming to align with the USA’s right wing ideology. If we were in the states it would be my vote against 15 and I just don’t know how to stomach it.

And this is exactly how it will play when it comes to our elections for Prime Minister. Which is why I’m not going to back away - even if I can’t break through to my family. Showing solidarity and support for the people in my community that could suffer from a conservative flip during our election is now the only thing I’ve got left. For any Canadians who are new to voting or are struggling with their thoughts on what to do. Research policies, pay attention to unbiased news outlets, and vote on issues that matter most to you on a country wide scale.

My family is celebrating today in Canada that he won…so I am with you for anyone who is hurting and feeling lost right now. This is unacceptable and I am sorry.

[cyb3rscoups]

The Glory AU (pt 2)

Warnings: Mentions of suicide, blood, gore, fight clubs, burn wounds and scars

Our fated lovers finally meet 🤧 Full collection

If you want to be added to the taglist please lmk

She hated going to school that year. From the day she transferred into the private institution, she knew it would be something ingrained in her memories forever.

From the start it seemed like her fate was inevitable. Her first day was when Valentina had chosen her.

Okoye had sat in the only seat left in the classroom, blissful and unknowing as the other students would turn to their friends and whisper about her; where she came from and why she was there.

The first day, she found out she had chosen her previous victim's seat. The same girl that drowned herself the night before.

From the first day, Okoye had no choice and everyday would be a cycle of agony.

“Ko-Ko!” Valentina’s shrill tone would call to Okoye from across the empty gymnasium as soon as the doors creaked open and she walked through. “I missed you girl!”

Okoye would curse in her head as she dragged her feet across the polished floor to where the trio stood. Valentina would always look her over in disgust before giving W'Kabi permission to do what he pleased.

“Oh come on, Okoye. Why the long face?” He would tease as he reached forward to grab her jacket and yanked her flush against him.

She would yelp and squeeze her eyes shut when he dipped his head to kiss her.

“You are disgusting.” Valentina would scoff at his vile attempts as she twirled a strand of fiery red hair around her finger, watching as Erik bounced and threw a basketball he had found. The dull and incessant thudding always irritating her quickly.

“Erik! Quit throwing that ball before I bash it through your skull!”

He caught the basketball as it bounced off the concrete wall and held it to his hip.

“Fuck you, white girl.” He rolled his eyes.

Erik always loved to hate Valentina. It was baffling to Okoye. How someone like Erik could put up with the girl, let alone allow himself to love her as deeply as he did. Nobody knew that back then, nobody but him.

Dogs both the boys were. Her dogs. She had trained the mutts and she controlled them well. They managed to drop everything to be at her beck and call. Carrying out all her dirty work so she wouldn't be tied to anything that happened back then. To hell for how they would end up.

“Ko-Ko! I need your help with something today.” She skipped over to her book bag. “I bought a new flat iron last night but I really need to make sure it works good.”

Out of her peripheral, she could see Erik roll his eyes. “Good luck getting it through.” He snickered, side eyeing the puff of curls atop Okoye’s head.

Right. The boys hadn’t been present to witness how Valentina got her last time. They'd actually gone to class for once and no one was able to smell her burning skin or hear her shrieks of pain.

So no. A failed press out was hardly what she intended to do with the new tool and Okoye knew it. As soon as the iron was plugged in and set to the highest heat, she could feel her heart plunge.

“No..Please! Not again!” Okoye broke W’Kabi’s lethal hold and dropped to her knees

“Oh come on!” Valentina stooped down, a lively glimmer dancing in her eyes. “Don’t be a bitch about it!”

“Please..Valentina. I swear I’ll do anything!”

The teen just stared at her, watching her break down and cry. Tears streaming down her cheeks as she mumbled incoherently. Valentina could feel a tingle in her finger tips as a crude smile found its way on her lips.

“You know what you can do for me, Okoye?” She reached for the girl, wiping her tears on the back of her hand before gripping her chin up and digging her stiletto nails into Okoye’s cheeks. “Kill yourself.”

A chill covered the room. Erik and W’Kabi felt it too. The basketball fell from Erik’s hold as he took a step towards the pair, his shoes squeaking against the hardwood.

“Val…it’s not that deep. Calm-“

“Don’t tell me what to do!” She shrieked.

Valentina released Okoye’s face, opting to yank off her cardigan instead. The material piled to the floor as she marched to the iron and yanked it from its plug. “Neither one of you are shit! She's nothing and neither was Aneka, god rest her pathetic soul!"

Erik hadn’t been able to tear his eyes away from Okoye and her exposed arms, her previous burns still fresh and blistering.

“Don't get soft on me now Erik. Hold her down!”

———

After getting out of the hospital, Attuma was back in the gym making up for the days he’d missed while stuck to a hospital bed thanks to Namora.

“Take it easy.” She had said and let him go with an unauthorized prescription for his migraines.

Well, he wouldn’t be doing that for sure. He was in the underground fight club a week later, taking a shot of tequila with a wince as people crowded around the going fight inside the cage behind him. Curses and dollar bills were thrown at the amateurs as they barely stood to each other in the bloody match. He couldn't wait to get back in the mix.

“Warrior! You are fighting tonight!” A hand was smacked across his back followed by a hearty chuckle.

“M’Baku! Of course I am!” Attuma delivered an equally harsh punch to the man's bicep.

“Good. I want a rematch.” The burly 6'7" human shook the bar ledge as he slammed his fist against it in a fit of excitement.

“Nah. Not you.” Attuma scoffed. “You won fair and square. Accept it.”

“Fuck no! You passed out so it doesn't count. If I'm winning, it's because I knocked you out my self." M'Baku gave him a shove that would've sent the average man to his ass but Attuma, given his matching build to M'baku, stood firm and shook his head.

"Fine. You'll get your rematch tonight. 30 minutes. Get us on the list." Attuma watched the bartender as he replaced his shot glass.

"10 minutes and we already are!" M'Baku laughed as he left his comrade to down his drink at the bar.

It took a total of 30 seconds for word to spread through the club that Attuma was back in the cage. It took another minute for the pair to be moved up thanks to the flood of bets towards the fight.

In no time, the cage was crowded with spectators around as M'Baku and Attuma entered its bloody space with the top half of their bodies bare, bruises from their last fight still purple and blue.

"Alright, alright, alright." The announcer started as they strapped their gloves and adjusted their mouthpieces.

"We got the notorious M'Baku and the indestructible Attuma going head to head once again! The betting window closes in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1! Gentlemen! Touch gloves and say a prayer!"

Attuma scoffed as M'Baku forced his gloves against his. "Don't hit me in the fucking face. I'll kill you."

"Okay pretty boy. Want me to call your mommy and tell her you love her too?" M'Baku laughed as the deafening bell rang through the club and their first round commenced.

Just like that, the crowd was in uproar and Okoye could barely muddle her way to the bar without colliding with men twice her size, yelling obscene profanities at each other.

Once she managed to get to the bar, she yelled her order to the bartender and settled. From where she was, she could clearly see the fight. Two substantial men connecting every punch and hit that was thrown til they were both a bloody mess. Yet neither of them seemed to grow weak.

The bell rung out a minute later and the two men parted with a shove. Attuma chuckled before gathering the blood in his mouth and spitting it into a bucket.

"The fuck did I say about my face?!" He growled out as a cut to his eyebrow began to split.

"Calm down, pretty boy. You ain't getting any uglier." M'baku stuck his tongue out in a childish sneer. Okoye let her self smile at the interaction as she went to sip her drink.

"Tired yet?" Attuma provoked with bloodstained smile as he fixed the bun on the back of his neck.

"Yeah you fucking wish." M'baku scoffed as the bell rang again. As if a switch had flipped, the two were done with friendly banter and back at each others throats.

Quite literally at that. M'baku managed to move faster than Attuma and get behind him, locking his thick arm around the other mans neck. Attuma yelled spit fire at his friend as the other laughed in amusement.

"Let go you asshole!"

"Tap out, pussy!" M'Baku tightened his grip and kicked his foot to the back of Attuma's legs, sending him to his knees as he gasped. "Tap out!"

"Fuck you!"

Okoye was entranced. Maybe because she didn't see cage matches often. Maybe because she found herself craving Attuma's victory. Maybe because if he won, that meant she could too.

The anxiety caused her arms to itch and she scratched at them mindlessly. Attuma's eyes started to water as his air flow was constricted to the arm around his neck. Through his tears, he spotted Okoye, her eyes focused on his withering physique, her eyes darting as her body shifted in the small bar stool.

Their eyes locked into each other and he swore he could see her mouth form around the words. "Get up."

"Shit.." He gasped as the strength in his body returned and he jabbed his arm to M'Baku's side, the hold on his neck loosening with every hit he sent to the other.

Once he was free, he punched his way to the finish line and M'Baku surrendered with a roll of his eyes and a roar from the crowd.

Attuma suddenly had no interest in the money he would win or the popularity it would gain him. He just needed to see this woman up close. She stayed put in her spot, finally being able to tend to her alcoholic desires now that the apprehensive match was over and the energy in the club had died down.

He kept his eyes trained on her figure as he weeded through the crowd, patting his back and shouting their congratulations. He saw her ready to depart and get up from the bar, setting down a 20 and shrugging her jacket on.

Attuma's strides got longer as he tried to catch her before she disperse and he lost her in the chaos. "Oh shit! Wait a minute!" He pushed past the last person in his way, grabbing her arm roughly so she wouldn't slip from him too soon.

"Ow! What the hell?!" She pulled at her limb until he released it with apologetic eyes contrasting her deep frown.

"I'm sorry! I really didn't mean to grab you so hard. I just saw you from the cage and-"

"You fight good. Congrats." Okoye rubbed her arm soothing the ache Attuma had unintentionally caused. Her compliment sent a boyish blush across his cheeks.

"Thanks. I'm Attuma."

"Cool." Okoye gave him a tight lipped smile before she attempted to walk away again. His hand, with a much softer force, was on her shoulder before she could turn.

"Well I mean- I- Will you tell me your name? I mean, that is how you get to know someone isn't it?" Attuma stuttered as he snatched his hand back before she could scowl at him again.

"Maybe you should worry more about not getting choked out within an inch of your life during a fight. Then you can know my name." Okoye smirked.

"Damn you're harsh." He sighed, only finding the fact that more enticing.

"I practice."

Okoye turned away again, maneuvering herself away from the bar.

"I'll see you around?" Attuma yelled after her.

"No thank you!"

@xblackreader @loeysaeri @hottie-hotch @faatxma

[bananapancakewithcondensedmilk]

Redefining Love: Breaking Free from the Blueprint

There’s a quiet revolution happening in the way we think about love, relationships, and connection—and it’s long overdue. For so long, we’ve been handed a blueprint: find “the one,” commit to monogamy, buy a house, have kids, and live happily ever after. But for many of us, this formula isn’t adding up. Instead, it often leads to dissatisfaction, infidelity, and a sense of emotional disconnection. Why is that? Let’s break it down together.

The Origin of the Blueprint

First, we need to understand where this conditioning comes from. Societal narratives don’t appear out of thin air; they’re built to serve a purpose. Historically, the traditional model of love and family was functional—it met economic, cultural, and even survival needs. It provided clear roles and expectations, ensuring stability in a world that often felt chaotic.

But society has evolved. Women are no longer confined to domestic roles, and men are no longer sole breadwinners. The need to strictly adhere to this traditional structure has diminished. And yet, the blueprint persists. Why? Because systems don’t change as fast as people do. The narrative sticks around, even when it no longer serves us.

The Problem With the “Perfect” Picture of Love

So, why do so many modern relationships feel hollow, even when they appear “successful” on the surface? I think it’s because we’re chasing an image of love rather than the experience of it. We’re told that milestones—engagements, weddings, children—are what define a fulfilling relationship. But those milestones don’t necessarily foster emotional connection.

Add in modern distractions like work stress, social media, and dating apps, and you’ve got a recipe for detachment. People become so focused on external measures of success that they lose sight of the internal, emotional nourishment a relationship requires.

Here’s the hard truth: when love is about fitting into roles rather than being deeply connected, it creates a void. And that void often leads to behaviors like infidelity—not because people are inherently unfaithful, but because they’re seeking the emotional intimacy they’re missing. Dating apps, in particular, exacerbate this. They give the illusion of infinite possibilities, tempting people to think there’s always something—or someone—better out there.

The Impact on Children: Passing Down Disconnection

And what about children? In many cases, they grow up as witnesses to this disconnection. When love becomes more about duty than a lived, present experience, children absorb that. They learn to view love as transactional or conditional, rather than unconditional and expansive.

Think about it: if a child grows up in an environment where love is more about achieving milestones—getting good grades, behaving perfectly, following rules—they’ll likely replicate that conditional understanding of love in their own relationships. It’s a cycle, and it’s one we need to break.

A New Vision of Love

So, what happens if we strip away the conditioning? What does love look like then? At its core, I believe love is about presence, connection, and acceptance. It’s not about ticking off boxes or fulfilling roles—it’s about truly seeing and being seen by another person.

This isn’t an abstract idea; it’s something I’ve experienced. My relationship with Artyom, for example, doesn’t follow societal norms. We’ve consciously chosen to define our connection on our terms, prioritizing raw honesty and emotional presence over external expectations. It’s not always easy, but it feels deeply real.

When you let go of the blueprint, love becomes less about “doing” and more about “being.” It’s about showing up fully—imperfect, vulnerable, and human—and allowing your partner to do the same.

Is the Blueprint Serving Us?

This brings me to a question that’s been on my mind: is the traditional conditioning around love serving anyone anymore? For some, maybe. But for many of us, it feels outdated, even harmful. The world is changing, and it’s time for our understanding of love to evolve with it.

Imagine a world where relationships aren’t measured by milestones but by the depth of connection. Where children grow up seeing love as a dynamic, living force, not a task or an obligation. Where love is a partnership of equals, built on mutual respect and emotional presence.

I think it’s possible. But it starts with us—questioning the conditioning we’ve inherited and being brave enough to rewrite the story.

What do you think? Are you ready to let go of the blueprint and embrace a new vision of love? Let’s figure it out together.

[garetlomodag]

2024 March & April: God encounters, but make it overseas

Mabuhay! How have you been? It’s been a while. I didn’t get enough time to finish my writeup for the month of March, so I decided to just merge it with April. A lot of things happened in the last month but mostly great and memorable things!!!

To name a few, I visited Mindanao in Cagayan de Oro and Bukidnon (always proud of my Mindanaoan roots!) for work, then I went to Dubai for my best friend's wedding, got to see a desert, ate great middle-eastern food, did a speaking engagement for work, and now I am here at Vancouver’s terminal M airport for my connecting flight to Toronto for work!

What a jam packed March and April right? I have to say while it seemed like it’s physically tiring, my trip to Dubai was very chill and enjoyable. I was so relaxed my body recalibrated to its old timings (eg monthly cycle, sorry #TMI). I did gain a few pounds LOL but it was accumulated from past weeks’ work events in Visayas and Mindanao to traveling to Dubai; now to Canada.

I also did recovery workouts in betweens, but only to sustain my body. I have a tendency to crash when I’m over fatigued, so I made sure I got my sweat times too LOL

Everything flew by so fast, but I did note some takeaways.

1. Having a community is critical in your different life seasons, but also having friendships over the years is a blessing. I know it already, but I realized how it impacted my life when I did my speech at my best friend's wedding. Not everyone gets a chance to journey with friends for a long time. Although it doesn't mean you cannot find and build great ones even at a short time. I am thankful God picked people in my life to witness some of my major milestones and life stages, and vice versa.

I remembered this verse about who your friends are reflect who you become:

“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.” Proverbs 13:20 NIV

Now I want to ask, who are your friends? Are you still tightly connected with your family? Who are the voices you listen to when you’re making decisions? Who gives you advice when you’re feeling down? If at this point you realize you actually don’t have one, I hope and pray you find comfort in God and that God also grant you with a good crew <3

2. Breaking off generational cycles and expectations can feel both liberating and guilting. Especially if you are forging paths different from what your family and loved ones once took. This also means thinking differently and choosing decisions that are unconventional. I’ve been single for most of my young adult life and I can say I’ve been living way way unconventional than what was expected of me. But I’d say sometimes I also wonder if I’m being too unconventional. Most days I would pray for guidance so I could be firm with my decisions even if it meant it would offend some people I love and care for.

3. God is involved, even in the tiniest details of our lives. This is no news if you’ve been seeing my IG stories. I had a suspense-filled visa processing for my Canada trip. Just to share what happened, my passport was only handed over to our company travel agency when I got back from my Dubai trip. This meant I only had 2 weeks of business days to have it approved, stamped, and released. I cannot stress enough how anxious I was with the whole thing. I was even mixing dreams and reality already. All this + I couldn’t tell anyone else at work what was happening because it was not sure yet. But wow at God for unveiling each step with miracles I cannot enumerate anymore. From travel agents booking ahead, to opening up flight slots at a fully booked flight the night before my target schedule, and to getting my visa on the day of the flight.

Headwinds still come, especially when you think everything is already settled. At this time I am already writing from the airport lounge (Thank You God for business lounge privileges <3) going back to the PH. Yes, my Canada trip is done! But can you believe the worst headwinds were there? Hate to say that it was an extremely bad feeling. I was only sustained by God’s grace the whole time. It was so difficult powering through the learning sessions while facing people-headwinds. I did not like every bit of it. You probably saw some of my stories about it, and I cannot highlight enough how hard it was. But I super like the Bison Storm analogy.

“When storms approach, they never run away from them. They run directly to and through them head-on. Their time within the storm is, therefore, significantly reduced.” read in full here: https://georgeshamblin.com/a-lesson-from-bison-running-to-and-through-the-storm/

It was an easier choice to back down, fold, and just yield to avoid conflict with people-headwinds. But my heart and mind, despite all the turmoil, had the urge to stand ground. I kept waking up at 2-3am for 2-3 days while thinking of it, but used that time to reconnect with God and regain footing. Imagine being away from my support system: my family, my dogs, close friends. Can only thank God for the sustenance.

Two months just flew by so fast. I am in awe of God’s blessings and victories. I am thankful for the best sets of support group, I am thankful for the favor. I can only hope I do better each day and live a life that is pleasing and honoring to God.

‘Til next time, folks. Let’s go, May! Balance of the year looks like it’s going to be filled with risks-taking decisions. Eeeeeeeeeeeyyyy let’s gooo

[blzzrdstryr]

If it's not againts the rule ,can I request Yandere childe, zhongli,diluc with reader every time she killed ,the time rewind back to the start of the event kinda like happy death day ? Thank you

Starring: Childe, Zhongli, Diluc

Childe

During his time in the Abyss, Childe had to encounter not only horrifying and bloodthirsty abominations that are the monsters dwelling in it’s depth, but also the figments of his imaginations. Sometimes he saw Morepesok, the tranquil waves and his peers playing near the shore, and his heart ached for it - for the blue clear sky and sense of security. Sometimes he saw war, it was alarming and eerie at first to see someone else die, but he got used to it and even developed a taste for that later - carnage and massacre were the reason he got out alive. And sometimes he saw his family - they died before his eyes one by one, his kind mother and father, smiley Tonya and mischievous Anton, and even baby Teucer. He had to see them die over and over and over, until a part of him shattered beyond any repair. That’s why he treasures them so much - he is too aware how frail and mortal they really are.

Childe thinks he’s going insane when he sees your first death. There’s so much blood and for the first time in years it’s smell and sight don’t bring any pleasure to the Harbinger, it sickens him instead. He stays there, clutching your body, completely stunned as a flower of hatred blossoms in his chest. He hates you for dying, he hates the world for killing you and most importantly he hates himself for failing to save you. Childe will become hysterical shortly after, decimating anyone and anything that had to do with your death, before collapsing on the ground, whole body trembling from the silent weeping.

The second it resets, Childe finds himself staring at you, completely shocked and dumbfounded. What was the thing that he saw earlier? A nightmare? He wants to chalk it up to his overactive imagination, when the day progresses in the exact same way. He will try to stop your death before it happens, but it will be fruitless regardless of what he does, as Childe will be subjected to your death time and time again.

This will lead to him losing the link with reality - for one moment he will even think that he never managed to escape the Abyss and all the years he spent on the surface are nothing but a mirage of his mind, yearning to see the world again. He will try to break the cycle any way he sees fit - once he will even think about killing you himself - maybe it will finally stop. His resolve will melt and vanish the second he decides to realize it into life. The cycle will stop once Childe kills everything and everyone he deems as a threat and you will be a sole witness to that. He will come to you then, all covered in blood and gore, uncaring of how terrifying he is, as his hand will pry your mouth open and force you into an unwanted kiss.

Diluc

Your death is one of Diluc’s worst nightmares. The death of his father left a bleak shadow of grief and rage over him and turned a cheerful and hopeful young knight into a brooding loner, and Diluc is sharply aware of that. He is aware of how anguish and pain twisted him into something darker, someone crueler. He doesn’t want to know what will happen if he sees you die - will he break down completely, losing any will to live? Will he turn into that bloodthirsty, sadistic monster, leaving scorched ruins and piles of burnt corpses in his wake?

No matter the answer, Diluc doesn’t want it to happen and does everything in his power to stop this chain of events: even before the “cycle” he will confine you in his manor and task his most trusted maids to keep a keen eye on you, afraid of anything bad happening to you while he is away.

He is completely stunned when he sees your initial death, it feels like the world itself stopped the second he catches your now breathless and unmoving body from collapsing, as he caresses your face with a trembling hand. Diluc’s mind will race, denial mixed with grief and rage clouding any semblance of rationality - he wants to scream and cry and hide somewhere to stop seeing this, he wants to close his eyes and pretend that nothing has happened, that you’re still alive and well. He can’t - it’s not fair and it doesn’t make sense, but he still can’t ignore this fact, can’t pretend that you’re well and safe no matter how his heart screams for this to happen.

Diluc will suddenly embrace you after a reset, a rare tear escaping his eyes as he smothers you in one tight hug. He will cease this opportunity and try his best to prevent your death, eliminating any perceived threat - you can’t go outside, it’s too dangerous, nor should you be around any sharp and pointy things either. In the end you will be confined in a small room, filled with soft and “safe” objects that Diluc is sure can’t kill you, you will also be subjected to the constant watch of one of the maids. Diluc can’t let you die again, even if it means stripping you from your basic rights and freedoms.

Zhongli

Out of all three Zhongli has the calmest reaction, that is not to say that he’s apathetic or unbothered by your death, but he lived six thousand years and is acquainted with death and losses way more than anyone else. Zhongli has simply gotten too used to the taste of grief to be completely shattered.

Nevertheless, he will allow himself to express his grief, gently caressing your dead body and mourning the time you yet had to spend together. He will reminisce about your past, remembering your smiles and laugh and the way you would move - so fluidly and elegantly, his heart aching at the thought that your life has been cut short and death stripped you off of any achievements you could make.

When it resets you will get an absolutely rare and unexpected view of shocked Zhongli, his mouth will be opened as he slowly blink at you, still processing what happened. Was he under the illusion or is it the erosion creeping up on him? Regardless of the answer, he will also try to stop you from dying.

He will order his adepti to watch over you when he can’t and will imprison you inside his own dimension, successfully eliminating most of the danger’s sources. Your screams and complaints won’t change his mind, as intends to keep you inside a serenitea pot for all eternity if it means that you will be safe and sound

[bubbleteaimagines]

VICTORY

Summary: It’s always a game between you and Eren to see who can come out on top — but maybe this time you’ll finally come to a draw.

Pairings: Eren x Reader

Warnings: Smut, unprotected sex, toxic relationship, degrading, light choking/spanking, creampie

Genre: NSFW 18+ ONLY

Authors Notes: Enjoy this filth as my official come back babes! Hope you enjoy!

Eren Jaeger is that one toxic ex that you just can’t escape, no matter how hard you try. You see him everywhere after the breakup — much to your annoyance. Around campus, in your favorite cafe that you used to go to together, and even...occasionally, in your bed. You hate yourself for even letting it happen, but there’s just something about his intoxicating taste that you can’t resist. You keep making the same mistake over and over again, letting him use your body when you know you shouldn’t, relishing in the sweet lies he whispers in your ear as he paints your walls over and over again.

“I love you.”

“You know I can’t live with you, baby.”

As usual, he leaves in the middle of the night. Not even a text, or a chance to say goodbye. He leaves and everything is back to the way it was before. You avoid each other, glare at each other, and scoff whenever you run across the others path. It’s like you were never even there the night before. Like you’re a stranger that’s always an inconvenience to him.

But then, the cycle repeats.

You find yourself underneath him time and time again, surrendering yourself to him. You tell him that’s just a way to get over him, that you don’t actually harbor any feelings for him anymore. After all, you couldn’t possibly still love the man that broke your heart, right?

Wrong.

Of course you still love him. He’s Eren Jaeger after all, the love of your life. The boy that you wanted to marry some day. Getting over him wasn’t as easy as people made it seem. Especially when he was on your mind constantly, plaguing every thought and ruining your emotions.

You weren’t sure if he even still loved you, but in the back of your mind you always held hope. Hope that one day, you’d be more than a warm body to him. That he’d love you and cherish you the way you he once did. You had hope...but that hope was shattered the minute you saw him with another girl.

It happened one day while you were strolling on campus, the love bites he had left in between your thighs not even a day old yet when you saw him — laughing and smiling with her. A girl that could have been your complete opposite, sitting in the same seat you once did. From the looks of it, they were quite cozy and it was obvious that he wanted you to see.

He wanted you to witness the way he caressed her face, telling her some cheesy pick up line and then shooting you a smirk as she giggled

He wanted you to see someone other than you making him happy.

Because that’s what Eren did, even when you were dating. He would constantly keep you on your toes, flirting with other woman like you weren’t even there. All just to get a reaction out of you— all just to see your face twitch the tiniest bit, lips curling into a frown as tears pricked your eyes.

He wanted to break your heart.

But as always, you knew just the right way to break his, too.

Two can play at this game, Jaeger, you thought as you marched away and wiped the salty liquid from your face.

If he wanted to make you jealous then fine, mission succeeded. He got what he wanted — but Eren wasn’t the only one that knew what buttons to push.

With that in mind, you sought out the one person that you knew would guarantee your revenge.

Jean Kirstein was a boy that no matter what, was Eren’s rival at everything. The two competed in class, at work, and now Jean was about to have to upper hand as you sat with him in the exact same spot Eren was, copying the girl's motions and even her laugh.

After a few moments, it was impossible to ignore the heated gaze on your back as you leaned in and gently laid a hand on Jean’s bicep. It was impossible to ignore the way the cafe seemingly went silent, the only sounds available being you and Jean.

You almost - almost - began to smirk as you finally heard his chair scrape back, Eren already cursing as he stomped over and promptly shoved Jean’s body away from you.

“What the fuck is this?” He seethed as he glanced between the two of you, an identical frown to yours tugging at his lips.

You smiled. “We’re just talking, Eren,” You told him innocently, the nonchalant shrug you gave pissing him off even more. “Do you have a problem with that?”

Those were the magic words. The moment of truth where Eren finally broke down, allowing you to see past his exterior.

“Of course I have a fucking problem with that. He’s touching what’s mine.”

Bingo. This round goes to Y/N.

You got what you wanted as a furious Eren suddenly grabbed your wrist, tugging you out of the cafe as you shouted a quick apology towards Jean and Eren’s fuming date. After that though, everything was suddenly a blur.

One moment you’re in his apartment, yelling at each other and shouting insults.

But then the next...

You somehow found yourself on his bed, bodies mixing together in an array of pleasure as Eren gripped your hair and pounded into you from behind. A string of filthy words were leaving his pretty lips, sounding like heaven as he kept a a hand wrapped around your throat and squeezed.

“You fucking slut. I go one day without fucking you and suddenly you’re with that fuck face?”

The anger was evident as he grinded his hips into yours, making you take every inch of him with no mercy. He wanted you to feel just how hurt he was, your ass suddenly on fire when he brought a hand down to spank you.

“Eren!” You squeaked out in a mixture of pleasure and pain, moaning at the way he was hitting all the right spots and then wincing at his harsh touch. “E-Eren I-I’m, I’m gonna-”

“Fuck,” He screwed his eyes shut as you clenched around him, relishing in the way you chanted his name as you came, not even caring about how loud you were being.

Right now, the only thing you were focused on was the immense pleasure washing over you, seeing stars as Eren continued to pound into your until he reached his own high.

“Baby...fuck you feel so fucking good around me, Princess. I love you. God, I love you so fucking much.”

Your heart fluttered as Eren began muttering his praises, leaning down to bury his face in the crook of your neck as he spilled himself deep inside of you. You could feel the warm liquid painting your walls, Eren’s hips coming to a still as he filled you to the brink.

Sore and sweaty, you still managed a smile as he finally collapsed beside you, out of breath but looking at you the way you’ve missed most.

“I love you too, Eren. It’s always gonna be me and you baby. Always.”

It might have been a game — one that you and Eren had been playing for far too long — but — like with all games — even the strongest of opponents can break the rules sometimes.

[pinkteapotwriting]

Not so Innocent desires

Wolfstar x fem!reader

Warning : This is so filthy dear lord, explicit sexual content, Sub!fem reader, spanking, oral, innocence kink and I think that’s it

Just good ol fashioned smut

Summary : Turns out you Remus and Sirius want to treat you a certain way, it takes some special kind of convincing from your end though.

Word count : 3164

The lovely @fionanovasleftnut had a wonderful idea that I couldn’t resist writing about. I’m not sure with how this one turned out but I hope I did the idea justice. xXx

---

Being a family friend of the Weasleys had its perks. You always had someone to stick up for you, always had someone who could make you laugh, and you always had a home with them, wherever that may be. You had moved out on your own as soon as you graduated from Hogwarts, but it seemed that wasn’t the way to start your life as a young adult. The wizarding world was at war and Molly Weasley was insistent that one of her adopted daughters should not be defenseless living alone. 

You had tried to reassure her that you would be fine, you even approached your most likely allies.

“Fred, George please tell her I’ll be fine. You understand right?” They only chuckled at your cute pout and brushed your concerns aside.

So no. No one was willing to risk the parting of their lovely Y/N.

You were too kindhearted, too sweet, too pure. A ray of sunshine in these dark times, too precious to leave unprotected. 

You had been so angry at first, but your anger was soon turned into bashfulness as you were met by two very attractive men. Of course you knew Professor Lupin, he was your teacher and even now words from his mouth directed your way made heat rise to your face.

 Then there was Sirius Black. His long black hair framed his face perfectly. His stormy grey eyes made you completely weak at the knees. 

Everything about these two men left you flustered, Remus’s quick wit, Sirius’s hearty laugh, the knowing glances they’d share, Remus’s scars you just wanted to spend hours tracing, and Sirius’s ring clad fingers that tapped impatiently against the table. For being in Azkaban for 12 years his hands sure looked strong and capable. 

It was a blessing and a curse really. You got to admire two very attractive men, yet you couldn’t manage much more than bashful nods at times. That didn’t stop them from approaching you however. They were so kind and welcoming, so much so that you took up Sirius’s offer to stay there rather than at the Weasleys. He knew you valued your alone time and got anxious in large groups so he thought you’d appreciate your own room rather than crowding in with the Weasleys. It was all good and well.

Except for how often you found yourself rubbing your thighs together at night to ease some sort of tension. Nothing could stop the wetness that pooled in your underwear at the memory of Sirius clenching his jaw in anger as Snape talked, or the way Remus calmed him down by rubbing his hand up and down his thigh. So once again that night you found yourself with that familiar ache you just didn’t know how to satisfy on your own. Your fingers just weren’t good enough. You got up in a huff to get some water at an attempt to calm down. You slipped down the hallway silently, but the sound of a low moan coming from Sirius’s room stopped you in your tracks. The door was slightly ajar and although you knew you shouldn’t peek in, the dull throbbing of your clit convinced you to stay. You had to stifle your own moan at the sight in front of you. 

Sirius was sitting on the edge of his four poster king sized bed while Remus was on his knees between his legs jacking him off.

“Fuck Pads, how was it already this hard I’ve hardly touched you.”

“It’s not my fault! Blame Y/N with those stupid lips she bites. And her big doe eyes and and- fuck Moony that feels so good.” 

Remus grinned at the chance to tease Sirius.

“Not as good as Y/N would feel though right? Bet you’d love to have her little hands wrapped around your cock huh. Imagine if you got to stretch out her perfect little pussy. She’s so fucking innocent, so pure”

“I wanna ruin her god she’s pretty, but at the same time she’s so precious I don’t wanna taint her. She deserves something more gentle and sweet.”

“You’re certainly smitten aren’t you?”

“Don’t act like you don’t wanna fuck her to the brink of tears. Have you heard that cute little giggle? Imagine what her whines sound like. I just wanna watch as you wrap your big hands round her thro-”

“S’that what you want? You wanna make innocent little Y/N our cockslut. Wanna make her our needy puppy. Wonder how many times we could make her come with just our fingers.”

“Fuck Remus I’m gonna cum.”

“Yeah that’s right love, cum to the picture of fucking her mercilessly, her nails scratching down your back cause you’re fucking her so hard.”

You watched Sirius shudder while Remus’s face lit up in victory. You decided it was best to leave before they were no longer distracted. 

Well, that certainly didn’t make you any less riled up. Looks like they wanted you as much as you wanted them. You knew you’d have to put your shyness aside, but how on earth do you talk to someone about that. Yes, hello I find you two super hot and I’d just love it if you’d degrade me and throw me around thank you so much. Frankly you never knew you wanted that yourself until you heard the words fall from their lips with ease. You put your plan in motion as you traveled back to your room, praying it would work.

---

You were giddy when you woke up, anxious for the day that awaited you. You decided to wear a shirt that Remus had once complimented, suddenly much more aware of how it complimented your chest. You paired it with your shortest skirt and thigh high socks. You turned around and shoulder checked to appreciate yourself, knowing if you bent over too much anyone could see the white lace thong you had underneath.

You knew the order meeting was starting earlier than usual so you pranced down the stairs and were met with a dumbstruck Ron and Ginny.

“Blimey Y/N, who are you trying to shag?” He was instantly met with a slap by Ginny.

“Shut it Ron, don’t talk about Y/N like that you git. You look adorable.” She reassured.

You smiled sweetly at her and gave her a quick peck on the cheek. “Thanks Gin, I’m gonna go get breakfast now.”

You swear you saw Remus and Sirius give a double take when you entered the kitchen. Pleased your plan was going well you continued into the next phase and sat between Fred and George casually as if your heart wasn’t racing a million miles an hour. Any laugh that the twins could pull from your lips were met with a hard stare from Sirius and Remus. Normally Remus could keep a calm disposition but you could notice the look of contempt in his eyes as his hand clenched the edge of the table. 

 You pushed your chair back and made your way to the sink. 

“Here Molly, let me help you clean up.”

“Thank you dear, you can just grab the dishes from the table love.” 

You made your way round the table and once you reached where your two admirers were you squeezed between them and bent over to grab the last plate, feeling your skirt ride up high enough to gain a sharp intake of breath from Sirius. 

“Sorry, it was just easier to get it this way.” 

You smiled to yourself as you helped Molly finish cleaning. Everything cycled out and everyone rearranged where they sat as they tidied up before the meeting began. You were thrilled at the chance to sit between Remus and Sirius now that everyone had moved. You leaned forward so you could rest your chin on your hand as Kingsley Shacklebolt spoke of the newest updates happening within the ministry. Fred and George would sometimes try to throw you off by making funny faces, but they were met by a hard glare by Remus which instantly simmered them down, while Sirius placed his arm around the back of your chair in a possessive manner. Welp, now was as good a time as ever to test the waters. You leaned back into your chair and crossed one leg over the other so your foot would brush against Sirius’s calf. He passed a glance, and you took a deep breath and moved it up and down his leg. You smirked at how you saw his hands clench and that spurred you on to lightly place your hand on Remus’s thigh.

“Y/N love, what are you doing exactly” Remus’s voice was shaky, like he was holding back.

Time to ice the cake.

“Nothing Remmy, I’m just being innocent little Y/N.”

Sirius’s head swerved at that one and you couldn’t help but notice the growing tent in his trousers.

---

It took forever for everyone to leave after the meeting. It took even longer to convince Molly that you were fine to stay here rather than go back to the burrow.

“Alright Y/N if you’re sure, but you know how to reach me if you need anything at all right?”

“Of course Molly.”

If she knew what you wanted these two men to do to you she would be dragging you by the ear out the door. But finally, finally she left.

Leaving you alone with two straight faced men whose expressions were unreadable. Remus was the first to break the silence. 

“Y/N, did you over hear our conversation last night”

You nodded, but Sirius wasn’t having it.

“Nuh uh, you’re gonna answer out loud for us pretty girl. You don’t get to tease us the way you do then act all shy now.”

“Yes, I heard.”

Remus returned to questioning you. “Yeah, and did you like what you heard?”

“I- I did.”

“Didn’t know you were such a naughty girl” Sirius chortled, “wish I would have known sooner.”

“I’m not naughty!”

“Oh yeah what makes you say that?”

“Cause I wanna be your good girl, please make me your good girl.”

Remus was hypnotised by the puppy dog eyes and pouty lips looking up at him.

“Shhh we’ve got you puppy, we just thought you’d want something more gentle.”

“No Remmy, I want you.”

“You can have me darling, let's go upstairs.”

He offered his hand to you and you took it eagerly, and began your journey upstairs, earning a chuckle from Sirius as you snatched his hand too on the way. As soon as you entered they had their hands on you, Sirius had you pressed against Remus as he was kissing your neck. 

“You sure you want this love?”

“Please Siri.”

“Alright pup, safe word is red okay? Any point you feel uncomfortable you tell us and we’ll stop immediately. Can you say it for me?” 

“Red.”

“Good girl,” Remus praised “Here, let's take all this off since it’s not covering much anyway.”

You nodded and lifted your arms for Remus while Sirius got on his knees to take off your skirt. He debated leaving the socks on, but he wanted you to feel every single thing so he took them off. Now last, but certainly not least. 

“As cute as these panties are, they're only in my way, can I take these off precious?”

“M Hmm.”

Remus was quite content to take off your bra and massage your breasts and nibble across your shoulders while Sirius continued his attempts to draw dirty words from your clean mouth.

“Baby, your pussy is so wet right now. Can I touch it, love?”

You spread your legs further for him as an invitation.

“Not here, our precious girl deserves to be comfy on the bed.” 

Remus sat against the headboard and motioned for you to follow suit between his thighs.

You practically skipped there, so excited for what was about to happen. You sat down with a quick plop and wiggled your hips to get more comfy, eyes wide as Sirius crawled up from the end of the bed to push your legs apart and gently trace your inner thighs with his forefinger.

“Tell me pup, have you ever touched yourself?”

You nodded bashfully, which Remus did not enjoy apparently as he lightly slapped your thigh with one hand while the other grabbed hold of your jaw to force your eyes onto Sirius fully.

“What did we say about speaking out loud pup, be a good girl.”

“Sorry Remmy, I got embarrassed, I do touch myself Siri”

Sirius grinned, “What makes you touch yourself sweet girl.”

“You, you and Moony do.” He relished in the whine that escaped your lips as he finally made contact with your aching clit, clearly he liked that answer.

“What do you imagine us doing to you pup.”

You moaned as his pace quickened. “Anything, anything you want.”

That’s when his tongue made contact on your clit instead. You jolted at the sudden change, but Remus was quick to hold you down.

“That feel good, sweetheart? I love Siri’s tongue too.” 

You could only throw your head back and mewl as Sirius’s tongue flicked faster and he added a finger to the mix, completely enthralled with how your entrance clenched around it desperately.

“Pads I think our pretty girl is gonna cum keep going. Has anyone ever made you feel this good puppy? Fred or George couldn’t make you feel like this could they?”

“No- no Remmy.”

“Wait till I get my turn love, go on and cum so I can make my pretty girl feel good too.”

Even Sirius’s tight grip on your thigh couldn’t keep you tethered as you released on his face. Bliss like you had never known overtook and it’s like you were hyper aware of every touch, every breath of theirs that fanned across your body, and every kiss that Remus awarded you with for being your lovely self.

And you couldn’t get enough of it.

Neither could Sirius as he leaned back to take in the view of the masterpiece he created. He loved how you had squirmed under his touch as he continued to thrust his fingers eagerly. 

He was feeling benevolent though and pulled out. Instead he took a firm grasp on your hair and pulled you on your hands and knees so you were eyelevel with his throbbing cock. 

Remus placed a couple of smacks on your ass now that it was exposed for him.

“What do you say to Pads for making you feel so good?”

Sirius wondered if you were aware how cute you looked with your owlish eyes oggling his long member.

“Thank you, Siri.”

“That’s right Puppy, now how about you return the favor.”

You just nodded obediently and stuck out your tongue, which only made Sirius growl even louder as he shoved his cock in your mouth. You tried your best to relax your throat but found yourself gagging at the surprise feeling of Remus’s head rubbing up and down your slick folds.

You arched your back and whimpered around Sirius’s cock and Remus got the message loud and clear. Slowly he inched his way inside groaning when your wet heat enveloped him completely. Once you were used to the feeling you wiggled your hips as a signal so he could move. The slow powerful thrusts of Remus made Sirius thrust through your perfect lips even faster at how the vibrations you emitted felt around his cock. His grip on your hair got even tighter.

“Fuck you feel so good puppy, such a good girl taking such good care of us. I’m gonna cum all over that pretty face, want me to cum all over your face, sweet girl?”

At the sound of your desperate whining he gave your face a few rough pats and yanked your head back. He couldn’t take his eyes off you as you stuck your tongue out waiting patiently while he stroked his dick furiously. Finally he released on your face, but before you got the chance to think he was licking it up with wide stripes across your face before moving to kiss Remus. You glanced over your shoulder at the two most beautiful men you’d ever been blessed to see, and moaned as their teeth clashed in a hungry and needy kiss. They stopped in a pant and had their foreheads pressed together, grinning at your demands.

“Moony I think our good little puppy wants more attention.”

“Aw, is that so my needy angel. I can fix that for you.”

Quicker than you could count he had you flipped on your back and started fucking into you ruthlessly. His movements were filled with so much determination that every thrust was pushing you to the end of the bed until your back was hanging off the edge. He grabbed hold of your legs and swung them both over your shoulders so he could reach even newer sensitive spots inside you, completely captivated by how freely your tits bounced in this position.

“Rem- Remus I’m gonna cum.”

“No you’re not, you be our good girl and hold on a little longer.”

“Please I can’t take it.”

“If you wanna cum you beg for it then, since you can’t wait.”

“Please please, let me be your good girl, please let me cum you make me feel so good please.”

“Hear that Pads? Imagine if someone heard pure little Y/N acting as our desperate puppy. Okay darling you go ahead and make a mess on my cock baby.”

A wave of euphoria rushed over you as you hung there and took every slam that came your way. The bliss however quickly became too much as your legs wriggled to find your escape from his strong grasp. He just grunted and let you slide into a heap on the floor. He swept to the side of the bed and around to where you were and hoisted you back on the bed so you were on your stomach and your legs hung off the edge. He pressed his hand to your back to firmly hold you in place.

“Angel you begged for this, now you’re gonna take it, yeah?”

He returned to his prior animalistic pace that summoned tears to roll down your cheeks. 

Sirius started petting your head lovingly “It’s okay love, you’re being such a good girl for Moony and I. You look so gorgeous with those tears all fucked out.”

He continued to comfort you and press kisses to your hairline until finally Remus reached satisfaction with his brutal attack on your tight hole.

“Fuck, Y/N I’m gonna cum”

He pulled out swiftly and his hips found their way to Sirius’s hungry lips. It was such a beautiful sight, but your voice made and audible whine before you could control yourself.

“What’s wrong sweetheart, thought you wanted me to stop.”

“Wanted your cum, wanted you to cum in me Remmy.”

“We’ve got plenty of time to make that happen precious girl.”

---

Hmmm yeah I’m not sure how I feel about this one, but I hope y’all enjoy my lovelies <3

@thotbutpurple @quindolyn @sunny-bunnny

[bohica160]

Omegaverse - Denied Time Off

Another omegaverse? No way! When your boss is being a dick -_-

(Sorry for the reupload, I apparently made it a chat the first time?🤷‍♀️)

ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗMinors gtfo, this isn't for youᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

CC: Alpha Chris, Fem omega reader, voyeurism(workplace)

Alpha Chris gets rather needy during his ruts. Sometimes they get very intense for the both of you, that it's in everyone's best interest that you both take the time off from work. A lot of companies are very lenient with allowing mated couples time off for heats and ruts. Obviously there are some cases that they will allow non-mated individuals time off. However for some reason when your boss found out your sweet loving boyfriend worked for BSAA, he started to treat you differently compared to others. Giving you a harder time from work load to requesting time off for important moments.

You knew Chris’s rut was going to happen any day now, and you figured it wouldn’t hurt to ask your boss for the week off. To no surprise, your boss barely let you finish before he said ‘no’. When you told Chris your boss needed you to come into work during his rut, on the outside he seemed a little annoyed but internally he was pissed. You figured you could call out a couple days saying you were sick, but you were worried how the remaining week will be for him when it hits. The next day was impossibly hard to leave for work with Chris standing behind you the whole time you got ready for work. Littering your neck with marks as he rubs his erect member against the plush of your ass. You were surprised you made it out with every piece of clothing on your person.

Once you walked into your cubicle, you noticed a pile of paperwork waiting for you on your desk. You could already tell by the stack, you would be coming home late. You sent Chris a quick text letting him know before you got to work. It was almost 11am, when you heard a few voices causing a commotion. You knew if you even dared to try to peek around a corner to see what it was, you knew it was best to stay out of office drama. It wasn't until a specific scent hit your nose. Right as you were about to get up from your seat, a big strong hand grabbed onto your forearm, pulling you up to stand. “Chris! What are you doing here?” You asked with a little hint of worry. You noticed his flushed cheeks and how his skin was glistening from the fluorescent lights. He quickly tugged you out of your work area and dragged you down the hall. The pheromones he was producing were causing some omegas to gather. A few were dumb enough to approach the two of you, causing the alpha to let out a warning growl baring his fangs, causing them all to shrink back and run away.

You didn't realize where he was taking you until he pulled you into a room and locked the door behind you. Noticing the bathroom stalls and sinks, you turned to ask him a question, only for him to seal your mouth with his. He backed you up against the counter, his big hands grabbing each cheek, lifting you up without breaking the kiss. He pulled back enough to pull off your shirt, attacking the bare skin with his lips and teeth. “C-chris, we can’t d-do this here.” Completely ignoring your protests, he unhooked your bra with one hand while he continued to trail down your skin. Sucking on the plush skin, spilling out from your bra. “Maybe if your fucking dick of a boss let you had some time off, we would be doing this at home instead of here”, he said with a groan, cupping your breasts, twisting your pebbled buds. Your sweet moans bounce off the walls.

You lean back, head thumping against the mirror as he latched his lips around one of your nipples. Bringing his free hand to the middle of your back, arching you more up into him. You cup his face pulling him up to face you, releasing your bud with a pop before devouring your pink swollen lips. Your tongues mingle against each other with passion and need, the alpha makes haste with his pants. The clinking of the metal buckle rings in your ear causing you to clench around nothing. You hook your legs around his, trying to pull him closer to you. He lets out a low chuckle against your lips before pulling away, “hmmm so eager, even though you didn’t want to do this here” “It's your fault” You respond with a pout with your eyebrows squeezed together. Giving you a smirk “Oh?” You hear a soft thud of his pants and belt hit the floor. “What exactly is my fault baby girl?” You lift up the edges of your skirt, bringing it to your mouth. Holding onto the fabric with your teeth, you flash him your lace panties. Closing your legs you swiftly slip them down before kicking them off. The alpha watches your every move as he slowly pumps his cock, smearing the beads of precum dripping down his slit. You back yourself further onto the counter putting your weight onto your arms as you lean back. Bringing your knees to your chest, resting your feet on the edge of the counter. Chris raises an eyebrow only for you to slowly open your legs giving the man a perfect view of your cunt. You can see his length twitch in his hand, letting out a long deep groan.

“Shit baby” he rasped, reaching forward with his unoccupied hand, using one of his thick digits to run up and down your soaked folds. “So fucking wet” He slowly inches his finger in. As your walls contract around his finger, he'd bury it deeper and deeper into your warm cunt. He curls his finger up, rubbing the rough pad against that soft spongy spot that has you trying to close your legs, only for him to release himself, to hold your legs still.

You let out a small whine, as he withdraws from your heated core. He laps up your slick dripping down his hand, letting out a hum of content. “Sorry baby girl”, he said, fisting himself as he lined himself up to your entrance. “I’d love to play with you more but,” He pushes himself in slowly, only giving you the tip at first. You let out a whine and try moving your hips forward, but his grip on your hips, have you in place. He pulls back just a bit and sinks a bit further each time. “I need to fuck this sweet pussy of yours.” With that last word, he snaps his hips into yours in one swift motion, pulling the most pornagraphic moan from your lips.

Each time his length twitches, your walls tighten around him. This vicious cycle continues until he starts rolling his hips into you at an agonizing slow speed. You wrap your arms around his neck pulling him closer, nipping on his ear. His hips start to pick up pace, with each graze of your teeth. His grunts cause the muscles in your pelvis to flutter and turn into jello. He moves his hands to your ass, squeezing each cheek as he lifts you up just enough to press your bundle of nerves against his abdomen. “F-fuck” you choke out as he continues to lift and drop you on his cock like you weigh absolutely nothing. “That’s it baby”, He grunts through clenched teeth. “You like getting fucked at work?” You squeeze your eyes shut as you clench around him. “You do, don’t you?” Your eyes shoot open as you shake your head. “You sure? Seems like you want everyone to hear you.” Right as you were about to say something, he drops you on his shaft as he thrusts up. You let out a cry as he presses up against your cervix. Head falling back as your legs wrap tightly around him. Your slick drips down his full balls, pooling below the two of you.

“S-shit. You okay angel?” You nod your head slowly bringing your head back forward, looking at his blue lust filled eyes. Releasing your grasp around his neck, you lean back putting your arms behind you to steady your upper body. You languidly roll your hips into his, fucking yourself on his cock. He stills, watching you bury his length deep into your core. He waits a moment before thrusting into you in time with yours. Your mouth hangs open, feeling the crown of his member abuse your spongy spot. Chris could feel the heat pool in his pelvic floors, heartbeat speeding up as he felt himself soon coming to his release. Your slick gummy walls flutter sporadically around him, the tension building up in your lower belly. “Gonna cum all over this fat cock?” He asks with a smirk. You respond nodding ra[idly. Chris pauses his thrusts only for you to quickly look up at him with confusion and annoyance. “Say it.” You search his face only seeing his sly smirk and playful gaze. You were at your wits end, you were so close, and the longer you waited the less pressure you felt in your abdomen. “Say it or I-” “Please! Please let me cream all over your fat cock! I want to be filled up with your thick cum! Plea-” Chris honestly wasn’t expecting that much of a reaction from you, but goddamn he didn’t think it was possible to get any harder.

With a flip of a switch Chris began to thrust into you frantically. His eyes drank in every inch of your body, from the way your tits bounced with every erratic thrust. To how your eyes rolled into the back of your head with a fucked out look plastered on your face blubbering complete nonsense. The tension in your abdomen was becoming unbearable, needing one more push to send you over the edge. “Shit, shit shit!” Chris felt the heat explode throughout his lower body, as he gave one hard thrust deep into your heat. As you felt your alphas cock spasm inside of you, shooting his warm thick cum up against the narrow end of your cunt, the strain of pressure inside you finally broke. As your cunt tried to milk every last drop of him, Chris began to hump into you, muscles pressing firmly on your clit. You threw your head back, “Fuck Chris!” you kept chanting as the contact to your pearl pushed you deeper into ecstasy. You swore you could feel your nails dig into the ceramic countertop.

Once Chris came down from his high, he pulled you into him, littering your face with soft sweet kisses, bringing you back down to Earth. Once you regained composure, you buried your face into his clammy neck. “Can we go home?” You asked barely above a whisper into his skin. He hummed in response, kissing your crown. He quickly dressed the two of you before he gathered you in his arms bridal style. When the two of you made it out of the bathroom, your boss was standing outside with a few other coworkers. Chris walked up to the man towering over him. His blue eyes glaring at him. “Deny her time off again, and I’ll keep fucking her here. Understood” You boss kept his gaze down at the floor, shaking his head as if his life depended on it. His scent flooded the place, making the place stink of fear. Chris turned to leave, “Don’t let it happen again” He called out, not bothering to look behind him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ°˖✧.*:･ Tag list:@thatgoblin

[merakiui]

hii could we get an angsty scenario/hcs of xiao and scaramouche/any characters you prefer! who are basically head over heels for someone but that person keeps getting with the wrong people and constantly getting their heart broken? Preferably with a good/fluffy ending but it’s up to you!

cw: angst + heartbreak  note - decided to go for scenarios! (❁´▽`❁)*✲ﾟ*

[Xiao] 

One Call Away—

The sudden shout of his name had brought him out into the open, where he finds you sitting in a field of wildflowers, your head hung and quiet sobs racking your hunched form.

“You called?” The gruffness in his voice startles you and your head snaps up. He notices your pained expression and the tears that refuse to cease, and it gives birth to a strange feeling within his chest. “What happened? Surely I am not too late.” And then he shakes his head. “No, I’m never late.”

“Ah... I’m sorry.” You sniffle, pitifully rubbing at your eyes. “I guess your name slipped out. I didn’t mean to bother you. I just didn’t mean to call for you either.”

Xiao raises a brow and then surveys the surrounding area. “Well, it doesn’t look like you’re in any mortal peril. In that case, I’ll leave you to—”

“No!”

Your sudden shout startles the both of you, with you drawing back and Xiao’s eyes widening ever so slightly. He wonders why you’re crying when beautiful scenery surrounds you. Are you truly that pathetic? Are mortals usually this weak-hearted? Xiao can’t wrap his head around the idea of grief; he’s an immortal who has seen plenty of hazardous scenarios worth grieving over. Yet with the passage of time he has learned to let such emotions drift away on a wind current. Emotions are useless to an adeptus.

But now he’s stuck with them.

“No?”

“D-Don’t go...” Your voice wobbles and you wipe at your reddened eyes. “I don’t want to bother you, but could you stay here with me? For a little while, at least. It’s all I’ll ask...”

He feels like he should decline your desperate plea before it spreads its perplexing roots throughout his system. The words are practically on the tip of his tongue and he struggles to verbalize them. If he could, he’d shake his head and vanish from your sight. There’s something about your expression that forces him to stay, and he truly detests the way his emotions run wild at the prospect of something he can’t quite comprehend.

“Fine.”

And so Xiao listens to you. It’s something he does best; his eyes and ears are open as he gives you his full, undivided attention. Half of him observes your reactions as you explain what happened and the other half zeros in on the way your subtle hand motions. While he might not be anywhere near a cupid—and he would never be caught giving out relationship advice to mortals, which is something he couldn’t do even if he tried—he is still a being of immense power. From what he’s able to understand from your explanation, your loved one decided to part from you because they believed it just wasn’t working. And you, having been struck with an immense sadness, failed to call out to them to clear up any misunderstandings.

Eventually, after internally wrestling with his own thoughts and feelings, he asks, “Do you want me to teach them a lesson? Should you need them to feel the same amount of despair you’re feeling—”

“Oh, no! No. No. They don’t deserve to be punished for that. I understand now that our feelings weren’t the same. We really weren’t working and that’s okay. It just...hurts.”

Xiao tilts his head, an innocently childish show of confusion. “Where?”

“It’s not a physical pain, Xiao. I mean, it could be. But...this is more emotional.” Your hand reaches out, fingers wrapping around his wrist. He stares down at your hand and he almost pulls away. Before he can even consider what’s happening, you’re guiding his hand to where your heart is. “In here. It hurts now, but I’ll overcome it eventually. I’m used to it anyways...”

The straight-faced adeptus remains still as he feels the fast-paced beat of your heart. Mortals have always been weak in his eyes: feeble beings who break at the slightest inconvenience. Although you don’t seem close to shattering and that confuses him more than he’d like to admit. Perhaps you are one of the more resilient humans he’s come across in recent years. It’s strange when he feels your heartbeat, so very certain and alive with the sour feelings a heartbreak brings. He’s never understood that either. Heartbreaks and relationships. The differences between friendship and romance. Both can be seen through to the very end, if fostered healthily.

So then why are you so sad?

Truthfully, you’ve always seemed sad to Xiao. As an adeptus, he’s never been able to fully grasp the meaning behind human emotions. They’re insignificant in his eyes, mere flashes of feeling that can hurt and blind. They’re troublesome and useless—certainly not something he would ever want to experience. But those emotions can heal and bring cheer. They’re not all entirely bad, nor are they as evil as he seems to think they are.

Xiao realizes his hand has been on your chest for a while now and he’s been staring at you so much that you’ve begun to shrink away, partially embarrassed to have him analyze you with so much scrutiny.

“Is...something wrong?”

He shakes his head slowly at first before retracting his arm. And then he notices you’ve stopped crying. He’s not sure when this happened, but he’s oddly relieved to see your neutral expression. Somehow your crying face is painful and it wounds him in a way he never would have imagined.

“Thank you for listening to my rant. I know this is probably meaningless to you, since you’re an adeptus and all, but it really means a lot. So I’m glad I was able to get these things off my chest. I feel a lot lighter now.”

“You’re not sad?”

“Ah. Well...” Your gaze flickers, eyes darting to and fro while you struggle to look at him. “I’m still sad, but I’ll get over it! Don’t worry! I’m resilient!”

Xiao’s brow furrows in confusion. As he has thought plenty of times before, mortals are far too complex. Eventually he sighs and says, “It’s okay to cry. Don’t keep that inside, okay? You’ll just hurt yourself even more.” Now he’s avoiding your gaze and there’s a barely noticeable tinge of pink dusting his pale cheeks. He’s really not good at consoling humans.

“Oh, Xiao.” You pull him in for a hug and he stiffens, trying to squeeze out of your arms like a cat near water. But then he feels your fingers digging into his arm and he realizes that you might actually need this hug. Despite the fact that he’s not used to freely giving out hugs—or even cheering up mortals, for that matter—he is definitely out of his element. “Really, thank you. I promise to make you an Almond Tofu as thanks.”

“There’s no need for that.” Hesitantly, as if he’s worried he’ll break you, he wraps his arms around your form. “I’m just helping you because you called my name. That’s all.”

But that’s not the full truth. Hidden in those words is the real reason why he even bothered to stay despite the false alarm. And it worries Xiao when he thinks about the implications. He really does like you and this admiration has surpassed platonic love. As long as you’re okay, though, he’ll swallow his feelings in favor of making sure you’re always happy. It’s one of his duties as your friend.

Friend. A word Xiao never thought he’d ever use, but it feels nice. He likes it.

Yet The Distance Remains Harrowing.

[Scaramouche] 

To Mend a Broken Heart—

You’re spilling your emotional guts in front of the Sixth of the Fatui Harbingers, tears freely running down your cheeks like two faulty water faucets. It’s a pathetic sight, really. Scaramouche witnessed this exact show just a few weeks ago when you were so certain that that fisher was the one. Now, after meeting and getting together with someone else for a short time, you’ve come out of yet another relationship, unhappy and unsatisfied.

He’s jealous. There’s no denying the envy he feels when you talk so highly of these people and then wail about them a few days later. It’s a vicious cycle of mending a fragile heart and then breaking it into pieces all over again. With no end in sight, you fall victim to your own demise in the pursuit of love. He wonders if you’ll ever learn to choose your next partner carefully rather than settling for anything with a pulse.

“This is exactly what I said would happen, was it not?” he says with a sigh. “Oh, woe is you. If you were smarter, this last relationship might have lasted longer.”

“That’s rich coming from you. I’ve never seen you in a relationship before,” you mutter, wiping angrily at your eyes. His eyelid twitches at the not-so-subtle jab. “Ugh!I hate being so unlucky! This is the worst.”

“Rather than your foul luck, I think the problem lies within you and your taste in partners.”

Sniffling, you lower your head onto the table, hoping to just melt into the crafted wood before you end up making even more of a fool out of yourself. It’s rare to be in the company of Scaramouche, considering how often he’s assigned missions that require swift travel and a covert profile. But whenever you do find yourself sitting across from him, indulging in light snacks and tea, it’s always because you’ve lost your latest lover; and your own sadness requires the nullifying effects of Scaramouche’s cynicism.

“They’re good people! I just don’t know why it never works out. We’re happy and we both like each other—it doesn’t make any sense. Am I missing something? Is it my fault? They probably got tired of me because I’m not a good person.“

“Perhaps.” He takes a moment to sip his tea and you muster a weak glare. Only Scaramouche can delight in his beverage while you’re holding back another onslaught of tears. “Your crocodile tears are hardly flattering and your apparent need for consistent affection might come off as clingy. And you have a tendency to find flaws within yourself whenever something doesn’t go your way. Adding onto that, you doubt yourself a lot and you’re always quick to take the blame for things that are out of your control. In a way you are partially—”

“I get it. I’m not a good person.”

“I never said anything of that sort. Now you’re just asking for pity.”

Oh, how close you are to punching that smirk off of his face.

“Then since you seem to know everything, my oh so helpful friend, why don’t you tell me what I’m missing?”

“With pleasure.” His cup finds the surface of the table as he ponders your demand for a moment. “You’re missing someone who meshes well with your personality.”

“That’s not true. Everyone I’ve been with so far—“ His skeptical look makes you stop short. “Okay. Maybe we forced it because we thought it was love. But that’s besides the point! There was still an attraction! I think...” You huff and bury your face in your arms, nearly almost sprawling on the table. You’re too depressed to even consider how impolite your actions look, and Scaramouche scoffs at your poor display of manners. “Where am I even going to find someone who ‘meshes well with my personality,’ hm?”

“I’m sure you’ve already found them.” He clears his throat, tracing a finger along a sanded knot in the wooden table. “You’re sitting across from him.”

Whether he intended for you to hear that whispered part, you can’t say for sure. But your head perks up and you fix him with a lopsided grin. “You’re kidding.”

“Hm?”

“Me and you, a couple?” A small giggle escapes your lips and you swipe the remaining tears out of your eyes. “Don’t joke about that. I’m trying to be sad here!”

It wasn’t a joke, he almost says and he catches himself, suddenly self-conscious.

“I don’t think we’d work out,” you continue, motioning between you and him. “We’d hardly see each other and you don’t seem like the type for romance. Besides, I’m not attracted to you in that way. You feel the same, right?”

Scaramouche stares into his cup before he meets your gaze, a tight smile gracing his expression. “Of course. Your inability to settle isn’t all that attractive.”

Your eyes roll and you finally pick up your own cup to take a large gulp of lukewarm tea. The bitter Harbinger observes your actions with narrowed eyes. There’s a distinct pain that taps at his hardened soul, splitting it apart as your words echo within his spinning head. I don’t think we’d work out. I’m not attracted to you in that way. Why is he suddenly feeling...upset? He’s not one for pitiful emotions; he’s a Harbinger, not a lovesick fool! He ought to glare at you and storm off, demanding the two of you never speak again. But he won’t say that because he doesn’t want to hurt you. Because he cares for you. Because he loves you.

You feel the same, right?

No, that’s not right. This is the love he’s been wallowing in since he first got acquainted with you. It’s strange when he remembers every event that has led up to the blossoming feelings that reside deep in the epicenter of his heart, but it’s even more strange that he can’t find the courage to voice his own opinion.

“We wouldn’t mix,” he reaffirms your statement with a cold tone. There is no warmth in his eyes. “After all, your taste in tea is as bad as your taste in partners.”

And even though he wishes you could see through his walls—just this once he’ll allow you to tear them down for the sake of a half-baked confession—you just sit there and grin, no longer teary-eyed and forlorn. How odd. His heart feels far heavier than it’s ever been before. And you’re already scanning your surroundings, hungry for a love that will never keep you sated. Perhaps you weren’t even sad in the first place.

Upon realizing this, Scaramouche wants nothing more than to disappear into the wood like a feeble worm and never come back out.

You Must Break Another.

[mimi-cee-hq]

Wildfires - Atsumu x f!reader

Summary: You're burned from last year's rumours, now fearing any hint of smoke. Yet you can't help, but fall for the childhood friend who's a balm to your wounds.

Genres, tropes, etc: angst with a satisfying and happy ending, angst to fluff, hurt/ comfort, exs to lovers (but not the usual kind), secret dating, drama and romance, but it's still somehow cute because that's just how I write lol

Warnings: false rumours about cheating and an illicit relationship, so it still technically mentions those things.

Words: 1.9k

Author's Notes: Hi Lia (@chimielie)! I'm your ☀️ anon. 🥰 You suggested exs to lovers and hurt/comfort for this prompt and it still technically is those things, but it's probably not what you expected.

If anyone is new to my blog and doesn't want to read angst, here's a cute fluff Atsumu x reader instead. :)

This fic is for the Heatwave Fic Exchange (@heatwave2021). Thank you for hosting this!

~*~*~

"I hadn't realized you two were still together."

Not even the overworked fan's whirring can drown out the strained silence that follows.

"We're not."

The air is dry and sweat forms on your brow. With the sun beating down, it's the perfect combination for a wildfire.

Atsumu's chin sits on his fist as he avoids your gaze. Lowering your eyes, you stare at the wooden table.

"Did he still care?" you ask yourself.

~*~*~

Plaid skirts sway as two students peek into their new classroom, attempting to be discreet. You hear their whispers from a distance, waiting in front of your own classroom.

"Look! We get Kinjou-sensei this year!" one exclaims.

"Are you serious?" the other asks after letting out a gasp. "I don't know if that's a good thing or not. I might end up staring at his face all day."

"Maybe it'll help you pay attention," her friend snickers.

You clench your jaw as heat rises in your body. They're able to indulge in frivolous remarks, ignorant of how you're left scarred from one fleeting gesture, a tiny piece of kindling that ignited into uncontrollable flames.

Cool hands cover your ears from behind you. Your jaw relaxes and the tension dissipates from your shoulders. You turn around to see Atsumu wearing a scowl on his lips. Sighing as you cross your arms, you ask, "Atsumu, what are you doing?"

"Well if only there was a way to make 'em shut up," he replies with a sharp tone.

You lean away from him and swat his hands back. "You're too close," you tell him.

"Alright!" he says, holding his hands up in surrender. "I'll go!"

As he walks away, he crosses his thumb and index finger behind his back, forming a little heart. You smirk at his hidden gesture to you.

"I love you too, Atsumu," you silently tell him as a smile graces your lips. However, it vanishes like the mist in the sun when yet another person calls after him, someone he doesn't know.

You skirt around the other students, avoiding their path, and rush to your desk. There are too many dry leaves around; a single spark can burst everything into flames.

Why does everyone have to know Atsumu?

~*~*~

"I wish you could've been my partner for the project," you say.

Atsumu pours a glass of water and places it on the table in front of you. "You ended up with that new girl, right?" he mentions and you reply with a nod. "She should be safe to work with."

You're startled once again when you hear the chimes from the front door. A rattan room divider obstructs your view of it, but you hunch down anyway as you finally pick up your spoon.

Atsumu sits across from you, sharing something about his team. His eyes dim when he realizes you haven't been listening.

"This isn't working," he tells you. "I thought this restaurant would be better because people can't see us from here." He runs his fingers in his hair, a sign he's frustrated.

"I– I forgot people can still hear us," you say in a low voice.

Atsumu sighs. "Let's just watch a movie at my house," he says. "Osamu already knows anyway."

"You know we can't," you protest. "Not when Hana and Haku drop by so often. They're going to realize we're together."

"But how are we supposed to have any fun when you're so scared?"

"I–" You lower your gaze, eyes unfocused towards your untouched bowl of rice. "Sorry, Atsumu."

"It's not your fault," he reminds you yet again. This exchange has become all too familiar. "Maybe we should finally tell Hana and Haku what happened to you."

"And have them find out the guy in the rumours is their beloved brother?" You cross your arms over your chest and rub your hand on your sleeve. "I still want to be comfortable around them, Atsumu. Ignorance is bliss right?"

His mouth twists before a groan escapes from it. He slouches in his seat and stares at the food in front of you, which remains the way the waitress left it.

"Let's take the train to Tokyo next time," he mutters. "Nobody'll know us there."

Your eyes grow before looking up at Atsumu. "What?" you slowly enunciate just above a whisper. "Don't you know how expensive that is?"

He presses his lips together before sharing his next suggestion. "I know where 'Samu's secret stash of money is…"

You narrow your eyes at him. "No, we're not stealing from him to go on a date, Atsumu."

"Alright," he says, lowering his eyes and dropping his shoulders.

Seeing his expression, you offer another idea. "How about Osaka?" It's only one city away.

Atsumu's eyes light up, excited at the chance of finally getting to enjoy some time with you. Although your smile doesn't quite reach your eyes, you hope leaving the vicinity of last year's wildfires would be enough, for Atsumu's sake and yours.

~*~*~

Your heart beats faster and your throat becomes dry. You weren't getting enough air.

"You're okay," you tell yourself. "She's not talking about you."

"Seriously! That happened at my old school," your project partner snickers as she recounts her story to you. "They even got the kiss on camera too! I felt so bad for her, but it's her own fault for cheating on him."

You begin to feel dizzy, catching a whiff of smoke from another victim's fire. Her words add fuel to a fire that cannot be stopped. Wildfires burn and burn, and are never satisfied until they run out of kindling.

"Oh! I've been meaning to ask. Are you dating Atsumu? The two of you seem really close!"

Your throat struggles to take control, attempting to keep your stomach down; it doesn't want to burn either.

They'll say you're cheating on Kinjou-sensei.

The tongue is a powerful weapon, causing destruction by those who are both untrained and ignorant as well as the truly malicious.

Your knees buckle as you pant for air, your grip weak on the knob. You need to get out.

Atsumu's figure is before you and you relax as he catches you. You never would have imagined that this guy would be your fleeting oasis.

~*~*~

"Let's break up," you tell Atsumu.

You both knew this was coming, yet a bucket of icy water chilled to the bone regardless of whether or not it was expected. Speaking those words aloud shocked you back into reality.

You hesitated dating each other in the first place, but you couldn't help but caress his strong hands when he admitted his feelings for you. Growing up together in your group of five, he was by your side from snotty noses to acne breakouts.

You didn't expect to fall for the hot-head of your bunch when rumours of you dating Kinjou-sensei spread. Atsumu attempted to extinguish every flame he spotted, witnessing your anguish each time you got burned.

"Maybe we can still do this," you say, contradicting your previous words.

"And what? Have ya pass out again every time someone asks about us?" Atsumu protests. He lowers his eyes as he clutches your hand. "Do ya know how worried I was about ya?"

Your heart flutters for a moment before you remind yourself that you can't keep him, the boy who has been by your side for so long.

"Aghhhhh! This is so stupid!!! Why are we suffering because of this made up crap?! 'Kinjou-sensei' had put a bandaid on me a thousand times more than he did t' ya! But nobody gives a crap about that!"

"I'm sorry Atsumu."

"Why the heck are ya sorry?!" he says, raising his voice.

"I– If I was just strong enough... If I could withstand their stupid words"–your lip trembles–"maybe I wouldn't have to choose between you and having some peace."

There's another silence between the two of you. Your fingers are loosely intertwined together, barely holding the fragile string between the two of you, as if it were a wick that would combust and disappear in a split second.

"Maybe we should just run away," Atsumu mumbles aloud.

"What?"

"Ya know, transfer schools. Or even drop out if we need ta."

"Atsumu! You can't! We can't! You have volleyball! And I... this is the only school that gave me a scholarship."

"Agh! Why is this so frustrating?!"

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing, ya idiot! Ya did nothing wrong!" He presses and rubs his forehead with the heel of his palm. "I just… I wish I could do more for ya." His arm drops at his side. "I wish I didn't feel so useless."

Your tears drip down your face. Could they be counted any more? If only you didn't fear getting caught dating Atsumu, terrified that last year's fires would morph into a raging beast. But another wildfire would not only destroy you but also the man you loved. If only your sores healed by now, you could have shown off your boyfriend, disregarding any of the flames.

If only you were fireproof.

But you weren't and now you're forced to loosen your grip on Atsumu, the balm to your wounds, and let him fall out of your hands.

~*~*~

"I hadn't realized you two were still together."

Not even the overworked fan's whirring can drown out the strained silence that follows.

"We're not."

It was three years since you talked to Atsumu, four since rumours first raged through the school. The two of you went through cycles of getting back together and breaking up again every time you learned that fear was still crippling you. Cutting off contact was the less painful option.

Years later, you're at a friend's cottage and Atsumu comes along without knowing you're here as well. Now that high school has come and gone, the smoke has dissipated and the fires have finished their course. You can finally breathe.

But does Atsumu still want you?

To anyone else, Atsumu is bored out of his mind, resting his chin on his fist. Nobody sees his thumb and finger forming a tiny heart.

Your heart flutters and you blink back tears. You attempt to hold back your growing grin, but you have no reason to hide it anymore.

You wrap your arms around him, almost causing him to topple off of his chair, Atsumu letting out a yelp. "What the heck are ya doing?"

You can finally release your feelings for him, openly and freely. The dam opens and waters rush to engulf him before you settle into his embrace.

"I love you too Atsumu," you tell him without a care in the world.

Osamu tells you he changed when you cut off contact. He desired to be a man, not wanting to feel so powerless, and poured himself into things he could do. It paid off.

"Did ya want to go somewhere together? I could even take ya all the way t' Rome if ya want."

The two of you hold each others' hands as the ocean's edge cools your feet. You lean against his shoulder, cherishing the moment that at one point seemed like an inaccessible dream.

You give him a peck on the cheek and smile. "Tokyo seems like a nice place for a date for now."

~*~*~

I hope you enjoyed this fic. :) (And I hope you liked it Lia!!) I guess I can be poetic if I try. lol. I had a whole commentary written out for this fic, but I decided against posting it here and making my author's notes as long as the fic itself. 😂

If you enjoyed this fic, I don't really have any similar pieces of writing at the moment. The only one that's similar is the hurt/comfort Kunimi WIP I've put off writing for so long because I didn't think I could pull off this type of fic. (And also because I think only one person will read it.) The theme in that one is pity/pride because pitiful is Kunimi's most hated word.

Anyway, if you want to see my usual style of writing, I have a cute tooth-rotting fluff Atsumu x reader one-shot. I currently also have an ongoing fake dating chaptered Suna fic, which is probably my best planned fic with the hints and foreshadowing and a nice mix of humour, fluff and shoujo-type angst. :)

I also have a Google form for my taglist if anyone is interested.

[crimeronan]

Ok so I’m into the dreamer trilogy and haven’t read the Raven cycle...what is Declan’s characterisation/journey there?

THIS MIGHT BE THE BEST ASK I’VE EVER RECEIVED. IMAGINE I’M STANDING WITH MY ARMS SPREAD USING DIFFERENT VOICES AND HAND GESTURES TO REENACT THIS STORY FOR A RESENTFUL CAPTIVE AUDIENCE

also declan’s TRC storyline is like. equal parts horribly fucking sad and unbelievably fucking hilarious so. i will try to strike a Balance

FIRST OFF.  there is exactly one (1) declan POV chapter in the entire series. it happens toward the end of the last book. up until then, everything we know about him comes from the observations and narration of others.

he is also a very minor character.  his importance grows throughout the series, but almost all of his actions happen offscreen.  it’s not until the last book that we know exactly how much he’s been dealing with the whole time.

when he’s introduced in the first book, he appears as a plot device.  here is a two-dimensional horrible controlling hardass who doesn’t give a shit about anything but his future political career.  look at his fake, smug fucking grin.  how did someone like ronan end up with a brother like him??  doesn’t matter.  it’s a convenient excuse for ronan to live with his best friend in a drafty warehouse, which means more room for YA hijinks!

declan’s introduction scene is Embroiled in Capital-D Douchebaggery. according to the narration (from gansey and adam), he loves to fuck women and then never call them back, cozy up to powerful people, and bitch about how ronan’s ruining his life by being sad about their dead parents.  SOME people can just get over their dead parents, ronan!

this intro scene is also Extremely Funny i 100% recommend reading it even if u don’t read the actual series.  ronan makes a nasty comment, declan goes “why are you the way that you are” and tries to salvage his date, gansey utters the phrase “man whore”

then later that night things go like. actually bad.

declan shows up at the same pizza place where ronan is with his friends.  this scene is gansey pov.  gansey runs out to the parking lot to find the two of them Very Literally Trying To Kill Each Other.  you don’t see that violence in cdth - there’s only the TINIEST shadow of it when declan confronts ronan over matthew - so i Cannot Express Enough that someone is going to end up hospitalized at BEST. ronan’s already slammed declan’s head on the car, declan’s already grabbed ronan and beaten the shit out of his face, like.

you do not get good old-fashioned Declan Lynch At His Actual Worst in cdth. u might be thinking, THAT guy???? doing THIS????

oh yeah. things are real bad between declan and ronan.

after gansey breaks up the fight (and gets punched in the face for his trouble, albeit accidentally), declan tells ronan that their dad would be fucking ashamed to see him now & that he’s washing his hands of it & basically if ronan wants to go off and fucking die, he can.

this is like. just a couple months after the magical suicide attempt referenced in cdth

in the aftermath of that scene it becomes clear that ronan absolutely unequivocally 100% will kill himself if he has to live with declan. hence. why he’s living with gansey instead.  gansey spends that whole night petrified that the declan altercation will lead to another attempt, and for Good Reason

so like, that’s how we first meet declan. he’s an uncaring wannabe corporate asshole who does not give a fuck and who only exists to exacerbate ronan’s mental health issues.

but then the opening of book 2 gets real interesting.

book 2 is where we start learning more about the lynch family.  we learn that ronan’s father was a dreamer who sold his creations on the black market, we learn that that’s why he was murdered. we learn that ronan’s a dreamer too. we learn that there are very powerful people looking for the greywaren, an artifact that takes objects from dreams. those powerful people just don’t realize it’s a person, yet.

so here’s the assassin who killed niall lynch.

he goes to declan’s dorm.

with everything we know about declan, the kid should be completely unprepared.  he can box, but the assassin knows that, so there’s no real advantage.  he’s alone, and he doesn’t have an escape route.

declan pulls out a gun.

this is an unexpected turn of events.

unfortunately he ends up getting beaten half to death with the butt of said gun, because he loses the ensuing physical struggle for the weapon.  the assassin is like, i need the greywaren.  declan is like, i know it exists but i don’t know what it is.  i’ll find it for you.  i’ll get it to you.  then you’ll leave me the fuck alone

now with everything we know of declan at this point - his attitude toward ronan, his general demeanor, and this new knowledge that he knew about the black market - there’s one obvious question.

will declan sell ronan out if he finds out about the dreaming.

and like, okay. their relationship is antagonistic in cdth but it is NOT what it is in trc. believe me when i tell you that at that point, when you’re reading, you can pretty reasonably go, “oh, god.  oh god.  oh god please no one ever tell declan what the greywaren is.  oh god.”

declan has some other interactions with ronan and the gang throughout the book, mostly where he’s just a hardass who tells ronan to stop causing trouble.  adam’s the only one who notices that declan is scared.  like bone-deep shaking to the core petrified.  about Something.

probably getting beaten to within an inch of his life by the man who murdered his father.  that’s the reasonable reader conclusion.

so imagine how everything changes when you find out that declan already knows.  that declan’s known about ronan’s dreaming for longer than ronan has.  that declan knew exactly what and who the greywaren was, and he lied to a man who was ready to torture him for information, and he got away with it.

suddenly a lot of things recontextualize.

“keep your head down and stop making trouble”? people are gonna NOTICE your magic bullshit, ronan, we do not have time for this!

“stop hanging with that loser druggie friend of yours”? you mean the loser druggie friend who sells on the magic black market and doesn’t care about protecting himself or anyone else?

“i got super weird for no reason about ronan sleeping close to adam”? i don’t have fucking TIME to be homophobic i’m busy with your POTENTIAL TO MANIFEST NIGHT TERRORS IN FRONT OF WITNESSES IN BROAD DAYLIGHT

“i’ll find out what the greywaren is and bring it to you”? i’ll die. i’m making a bargain to die. i’m never giving you the greywaren and i know you’re going to kill me about it and that’s fine as long as my brothers are safe

ronan doesn’t know that he dreamed matthew.  declan knows.  he’s known the whole time.  declan tells ronan in book 3.  and then things recontextualize even further, because ronan’s death is also matthew’s, and matthew IS close to declan in trc.

but declan never tells the goddamn truth unless it’s his last option.  he doesn’t tell ronan that he knows about the dreaming and he doesn’t tell ronan what specifically wants to hurt him and the lack of communication fucking destroys both of them.

in the last book, ronan realizes declan loves him.

more than that, he realizes declan’s loved him the whole time.

this is when declan finally tells the truth.  things are getting bad, plot-wise, and declan is scared, so he comes clean.  he tells ronan that niall specifically tasked declan with protecting ronan from the market.  he begs ronan to run from the danger.  “let’s pour gasoline on everything dad left and start over.”

this is also when ronan realizes that declan’s childhood was very different from ronan’s own.  and that niall and aurora lynch were not the same people to declan that they were to ronan.  and that their father’s decisions are what’s driven the wedge between him and declan all this time

(he’s still struggling with the cognitive dissonance of this in cdth. i don’t think he knows how to adjust his perception of declan to fit this new information.)

aaaaand the final scene with declan makes me cry every time i read it so instead of summarizing, here’s the important part:

Ronan delivered a sharp tap to the object, and a small cloud of fiery orbs sprayed up with a sparkling hiss.

“Jesus, Ronan!” Declan jerked his chin away.

“Please. Did you think I’d blow your face off?”

He demonstrated it again, that quick tap, that burst of brilliant orbs. He tipped it into Declan’s hand, and before Declan could say anything, jabbed it to activate it once more.

Orbs gasped up into the air. For a moment, he saw how his brother was caught inside them, watching them soar furiously around his face, each gold sun firing gold and white, and when he saw the spacious longing in Declan’s face, he realized how much Declan had missed by growing up neither dreamer nor dreamt. This had never been his home. The Lynches had never tried to make it Declan’s home.

“Declan?” Ronan asked.

Declan’s face cleared. “This is the most useful thing you’ve ever dreamt. You should name it.”

“I have. ORBMASTER. All caps.”

“Technically you’re the orbmaster though, right? And that’s just an orb.”

“Anyone who holds it becomes an ORBMASTER. You’re an ORBMASTER right now. There, keep it, put it in your pocket. D.C. ORBMASTER.”

Declan reached out and scuffed Ronan’s shaved head. “You’re such a little asshole.”

The last time they’d stood on this roof together, their parents had both been alive, and the cattle in these fields had been slowly grazing, and the world had been a smaller place. That time was gone, but for once, it was all right.

The brothers both looked back over the place that had made them, and then they climbed down from the roof together.