#in a way that doesn't make them feel antagonized or cornered or judged

[nohkalikai]

i understand it's an issue of wanting to relate to people and not wanting to be left out but there has got to be a better way of trying to fit in

[yannaryartside]

Sydney has never antagonized Carmy

I keep coming back to that scene between Cicero and Sydney where he tells her basically how insufferable Carmy is, but she just says “I don't know what you want me to say to that. There is a layer to this about Carmy being her superior, but it is definitely more than that, the bear operates like a family joint and Syd is part of it, she is expected to take part in the drama.

There has always been a tendency between the people that surround Carmy to criticize him, both when he is doing good or doing bad.

Now, this season Carmy really continued the circle of violence he was once trapped in. He did it because he thought it was the only way he could be the best, because evil chef taught him so. The show made a point to show us Carmys kind nature until s2 so we could understand that the abuse he inflicts on others doesn't come from a place of actual malice.

But his family doesn't know about evil chef. Knowing it will not make Carmy’s behavior okay either. The way most violent people were abused as well.

Sydney has never acted like Carmys behavior is okay, even when his family ignored the other shitty things he has done because it didnt affect them directly until now.

All that being said, it was amazing to see Sydney never talking bad about Carmy behind him. The scene with her and Cicero was a stellar example of it.

Now, why doesn't she takes sides? Why not talk about Carmy behind his back?

Because that won't resolve anything, it would not be helpful to anybody. She doesn't take sides (this is not a you vs us thing) she doesn't judge. She even comforts Cicero about his regrets in his lack of involvement with the bear kids, when she grew up with a very present father herself, she could have judge, she didn't.

Edit: idk if I was sucesfull on making a point here:

Sydney doesn't like to condemn or limit the potential of people to what she knows is the worst of them. Her whole relationship with Richie is a good example of it. Once he started to show up for her and she saw that he cares for the restaurant she started trusting him. She has endured Carmys antics in part because she knows how much he can encourage and support the ones surrounding him, her included. Even faith has its limits of course.

I just wanted to highlight that judging/condemning others is easy, especially behind their backs. She never assumed she knew the whole story. She never took any high ground. She just called it shitty behavior as she saw it, and even did it with patience and love for everyone involved.

There is a sad undertone to all this, wich is as a black woman she may feel she needs to put her own needs aside for the things she wants to achieve. I think she took a role of a protector this season. She may have felt she was responsible for helping the crew under her survive this, even when she constantly called on Carmys bullshit.

She was a good friend, she has been a good person all around even how much she has been push. I don't want to advocate for women to be limited to the moral compass for the tragic hero. Still, I am sure that if she were a male or white, you would see all corners of the Bear fandom treat this character like the equivalent of Captain America or Superman. She will be the hero and Carmen will be the villain. Because she is indeed the moral compass, she is an example to the viewer on how to react with maturity, holistic view, and compassion to all the messed up situations the story throws her in.

[llondonfog]

Hi!! I was an anon from quite some time ago, saying that Mr. Plover would be a cute name for Sebek's dad :) Your response definitely raised some really fun questions, and I had some thoughts to share if you'd like to entertain them :) but also, feel free to ignore! I dont wanna bombard you lol. Your posts are so fun to see, and are awesome for world building. Thank you for your little corner of the internet <3 Anywho, I wrote a little thingy...

To be a Zigvolt is to love bravely.

Truly.

Unafraid, and without condition.

Who is Sebek to contest his exalted family legacy?

And the Zigvolts, mother and father, hold tight with conviction. Not the conviction of heavy-fisted mandates, nor the snarl of battle-torn declarations. Not the conviction of a judge, or a king, or a soldier. Their conviction is of tea-time weather observations, of the kiss of tide at sea, the fact that is sunrise, and the moon that trails after. Something simple, and mundane, and unfailingly honest. And above all else, above murmured insults, and booming jabs at rounded ears and smaller magics, the Zigvolts believe, know, that their son loves them.

Truly, bravely, and without condition.

It follows in him placing away the mugs after washing, and knocking on the dentistry's door with that huff of his. In the glances behind an unsheathed sword, eyes searching for a familiar truth.

And the Zigvolts smile, for he knows.

And Sebek turns his face, embarrassed.

Emboldened.

Dude. Sebek as a character????? MUWAH. His inner conflict of human vs fae is so complex and compelling. That type of conflict, obviously, doesn't arise just out of nowhere. The Valley of Thorn's general society obviously had a heavy impact, and I believe that Sebek's grandfather was a primary influence as well. So Sebek's parents, OOUGH. It really gets you wondering about how they feel, especially his human father. But? His parents? Are just so? Loving? They truly, and deeply love their son, and I think that they know Sebek loves them back, even if he himself doesn't really understand his own feelings. This manifests in a variety of ways, but a definite drawback is that because they know that their son loves them, they don't really adress the antagonism he holds towards human kind? Towards himself. I think that the Zigvolts believe that Sebek will come to understand with time, and that their love for each other is enough. Especially with fae culture, their lives long and full, learning and growth seems to be something that also develops over time. (Mr. Plover is someone who seems to adopt fae culture, and wonderfully open minded, so I think he adopts this kind of attitude towards Sebek as well?) There is no rush to correct Sebek, and maybe with fae culture, a lesson learned by oneself over time is more valuable than a one forced upon them. If that makes any sense. So his parents belief in his love and intelligence and future, almost feeds into this conflict? But it's... fine bc he's half fae? Obviously not fine, but, ya know? Anyways😂😂😂 I love their family so much😭😭😭 if you made it here, thanks for listening to my ramble! :) Especially with the Silver stuff coming up WHICH I AM STOKED FOR I AM EATING YOUR WRITING I AM CRYING😭😭😭

I hope you have a wonderful day :)) <3

@estcaligo // i felt morally obligated to tag you in the most wholesome sebek ask i've ever received

first things, oh my goodness, hello again!! i'm so glad you enjoyed that response and you're more than welcome here anytime to share your twst thoughts and questions, i really enjoy answering them and interacting with you guys!! it means so much to me that you enjoy my silly content corner!! <3

secondly, YOUR LITTLE PROMPT HAD ME TEARING UP OH M YGOD. i don't know if you guys understand how much i adore the trope of big huffy characters showing their love and affection through small gestures of care and intimacy rather than grand displays and the way you described that!! sebek's little grumpy noises that even if he says he doesn't understand his father, he's still going out of his way to be with him at the office!! the way he goes to put the dishes away (most likely on the tallest shelves!!) for his family aaaaaaa

and just the overwhelming theme that the quality their family prides themselves most on is their conviction WHICH IS SO TRUE OF SEBEK AS A CHARACTER AND WHAT WE KNOW OF HIS MOTHER AND FATHER!!! conviction to their love, conviction in his liege i literally am obsessed with the mundane little observations that when placed in this context ARE SO INSPIRING AND MEANINGFUL!!!

i really hope we get to understand more about sebek's life and past, especially in ch7 if we get the backstory on lilia and baul (sebek's grandfather) and how he views humankind. and if not there, then i really hope we get a briar valley event where we can see the zigvolts in all their glory!! the dentist office, sebek's siblings, the home where he grew up!!! but you raise such a good point about how their belief that he will mature with time could also be a hinderance since they're not stepping in to facilitate his personal growth BUT I HAVE FAITH IN SEBEK!!! from what we've seen so far in ch7, he's had his foundations shaken considerably, and how he comes out of this is going to be a huge testament to his love for diasomnia