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nomazee · 1 year ago

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hihi!! i love ur writing sm and was wondering if u could do a chuuya x also mafia executive reader (similar to the dazai friends to lovers u did a bit ago) with the unestablished relationship but so obviously in love trope

thank u sm!!

i went so overboard omfg FORGIVE ME... i hope this is cohesive i kept working at it at like deep into the night so it's a little hazy omg but i loved this so much im such a sucker for this trope and chuuya and dazai are like the best characters for this kind of genre i feel

pairing: chuuya x gn reader word count: 2.8k content: fluff, hurt/comfort (an abundance of it), friends-to-lovers, mentions of sickness (vomiting, fever, etc), domestic fluff, sweet stuff, also hand-wavey teenage timeline because i didn't read all of stormbringer forgive me...

°+..｡ﾟ｡ﾟ+.*.｡.

“They said they might promote me, did you hear?��

Chuuya glances to the side at the sudden sound of your voice. You’re leaning over his shoulder from behind him, face mere inches from his as you grin widely. He has to fight the twitches of his own lips to stop himself from smiling back. “And who’s they, exactly?”

“Oh, you know. The grapevine. Just some whispers in the organization. And Kouyou.” You lean back, the radiating warmth of your body suddenly escaping Chuuya. He walks behind you as you make your way down the hallway, a little jump in your step as you recount the news to him.

“It’s what you get for working so hard. Guess it paid off.”

“You think I’m hardworking! You’re a flatterer, Chuuya Nakahara.”

“Sure am,” he quips back with amusement. Banter with you is different than with Dazai. With you, it’s lighthearted, and silly, and makes him feel like he’s fourteen and messing around with the Sheep again. With Dazai, it’s… charged, and fast-paced, and builds up a kind of aggravated energy within him that works well in fights but not in a room of Kouyou’s antiques.

“But guess what,” you start again, looking over your shoulder where Chuuya follows close behind. Your pace slows down to let him catch up to you and walk side-by-side, now. “I think you’ve got a good chance, too. You’ve got some executive qualities, you know?”

It makes Chuuya pause for a moment, because he hasn’t really thought about it before. After the mess that was the Sheep, he hadn’t considered taking up any kind of leadership or executive position in the Port Mafia. It wasn’t really his thing—too much work, too much responsibility. And as much as he loathed to admit it, it would probably mean even less time to spend with you and Dazai. Being mentored by different people already limited your time with each other.

He tries not to think too hard about the implications of it—of you and Dazai working under Mori’s hands while Chuuya gets Kouyou’s firm, but gentler palms. A vague kind of sickness washes over him that he tries to shake off.

“I don’t know about that. I think I do better in a quieter position, don't you think?”

“Nothing is quiet about you. Especially not with that partner of yours,” you joke back. “I could put in a good word for you! Once I get promoted, I’ll have, like, a bunch of power and influence, and I’ll be all high and mighty, and you and me and Dazai can all take care of the Port Mafia and be all cool, and everything.”

It’s a pipe dream. Both of you know that. Chuuya knows best about your hidden resentment of this organization and all that it stands for, all that it does. He’s heard whispers about your plans to take over—plans that would never come to fruition. Plans that were more like dreams and wishes and hopes. Something to get you through the day. The budding smile on his face falters when he turns and sees that distant look in your eyes. A sigh bubbles in his chest, but he holds it down.

“Hey, slow down. You don’t even know if you’re getting the position or not.” His comment is met with a roll of your eyes and a chest-deep groan. You launch into a big speech about how qualified you are for the job, and all the different things you’d institute as a mafia executive (nap time, stress room with cats, petting zoo, iced tea dispensers), and Chuuya nods along and laughs for as long as he can.

===

You do, in fact, get promoted to an executive, but at the cost of a lot of things. Dazai leaves the mafia with no warning to you or Chuuya. You don't see him at all for two weeks leading up to his defection, and it all happens in a blur that leaves your head swimming with vertigo and your body much too frail to handle everything.

Chuuya finds you sobbing in your en suite bathroom, kneeling on the floor and crying so hard that you’re dry heaving. He hasn’t seen you like this before. Even in your rare moments of vulnerability, it was never something so visceral and uncensored. He stands in the doorway, looking down at you, and freezes. His palms itch with the desire to do something, something that he hasn’t learned.

“You… Hey, hey,” Chuuya drops to the floor once he snaps out of his daze, crouching next to your curled up form as you shake with the force of your tears. He tentatively reaches out a hand, easing onto your shoulder. When you don’t give any sort of negative reaction, he wraps his arms around your shoulders and pulls you in for an embrace.

It’s odd. This isn’t something that the three of you did. For all that you and him and Dazai kicked and pushed and shoved each other jokingly, this kind of touch is unfamiliar. It’s scalding in the way that sitting in front of a space heater in the dead of winter burns you.

He shushes you like a child because he’s not sure what else to say. He’s just as shaken by Dazai’s defection, but he knew that you and Dazai had become so close over the last few years. Being trained under Mori together does that. His chest squeezes at the sight of you like this, broken down and shivering and sick at the loss of your friend.

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I’m so sorry. Shhh, it’s— it’s okay.”

Chuuya smooths a hand over the top of your head, sliding down to rest between your shoulderblades. His mouth presses against your temple in a gentle kiss, feeling how cold and clammy your skin has gotten. He doesn’t know how to heal you. His hands are made to weigh people down and hurt and subdue, and he’s not sure if he can handle the gentler things like holding you and swathing you in blankets and cooking you soup.

But, he thinks with a renewed determination. There’s no harm in trying.

Three months later, you take Dazai’s executive position at the age of nineteen. Chuuya follows suit after another year and a half and becomes executive at twenty. You only think of Dazai when your head swims in gin and when you can’t feel the heat of Chuuya’s hands near you.

===

The both of you find yourselves in Chuuya’s apartment drinking the night away. At this point, you’re both twenty-one, and being in the mafia has offered you countless resources for alcohol and the like. A warm haze has blanketed you as you take another sip of whatever sweet fruity drink Chuuya has concocted for you. He drinks a glass of wine, because he’s weird and bougie, which you tell him straightforwardly.

“Wine’s just an acquired taste,” he tells you.

“It’s glorified grape juice. It tastes like yeast.”

“That’s… kind of what it is.”

You laugh so hard that tears bead in your eyes and you hit him on the shoulder hard enough to bruise. It’s not even that funny, really, and he wasn’t even trying to make you laugh, but it’s so late into the night that you don’t even know what time it is and everything is funny when you’re this drunk.

“I’m hungry, Chuuya. I miss your soup,” you say, a whine in your voice as you throw your head back against the armrest of the couch. You’re stretched out on his velvet upholstered couch with your feet in his lap, and he’s been tracing circles against your bare shins while some documentary plays in the background on the TV. “You haven’t cooked for me in forever. I thought it was your duty as a househusband to cook every night, or something.”

“Hey! I’m not anyone’s househusband,” he shouts in protest. When you push your head up from the armrest to glance at him, his tanned face is flushed a warm red and his brow is furrowed in playful indignation and you’re struck with the urge to bite him like a chew toy. Instead, you let out a soft kind of laugh and roll your eyes.

“Yeah, you are. You’re my husband. Have been since the day I met you.” In a burst of newfound energy, you propel yourself up and off the couch, swinging your legs off his lap and standing up. “Let’s go make some soup. Your pantry’s probably stocked, right? Since you’re on top of all your housekeeping.”

“Geez. You’re never letting that go, are you?”

“Of course not! Come on. You have to teach me how to cook now.”

Chuuya has reserved bone broth in his freezer, because of course he does. You submerge a container of it in hot water and wait for it to defrost while he helps you dice and saute vegetables in a pressure cooker.

(“Don't pressure cookers, like, explode, or something?”

“...who taught you that.”)

It’s a miracle you can even use a knife safely, because your head is still swimming a little bit and the line of empty bottles on the coffee table taunts you and your bad decisions. You also blame it for the way you stick close to Chuuya, bumping your hips together and leaning your head on his shoulder for a few fleeting moments until the pressure cooker starts hissing.

He serves you a heaping bowl and when you tell him you’ll puke if you eat the whole thing, he pushes the bowl at you from across the counter and says, “I’ll guess I’ll just clean your puke for you too, then.”

“Gross. You’re really a househusband if you’re brave enough to do that.”

“Househusband this, househusband that. All I do is cook.”

“And clean up the vomit of your lovely lovely spouse.”

“Sure,” he says, and he turns back to you and puts his own bowl next to yours. Then, in a swift, undeterred motion, he reaches across the kitchen island, over both steaming bowls of soup and kisses you straight on the mouth. It shocks you right into lucidity, eyes blown wide and lips nearly parting at the sudden contact. Before you can really think about it, Chuuya pulls back, circling around the kitchen island to sit next to you with two spoons so you can both eat. “As long as that lovely lovely spouse is you.”

You feel—light. Airy, sick, nauseous, more at peace than you have been in the last three years. A stupid smile starts forming on your face and you hide your giddy laughs into your soup.

Chuuya would never act like this sober, you think, still cherishing the little moment you have. Thankfully, you’re proven wrong when he keeps doing it—walking you back to your apartment the next day, going out to a mafia-affiliated diner the next week, in an empty meeting room after everyone has left.

===

Another year passes. You find yourself in the throes of the cannibalism incident—not as a bystander, but as a victim. Because that’s just your luck, really.

You don’t know how you were caught in the crossfire between Fyodor and Mori, but somehow you were infected with the cannibalism virus and bedridden for nearly three days, in-and-out of consciousness while you hoped and prayed that somebody would save you. For the entirety of the conflict, you were left alone in the PM infirmary, sweating off your perpetual fever and coughing up stomach bile into a metal garbage can.

It was awful. There’s no blame to put on anyone, though. Everyone who was able to stand was on the front lines, so to speak, and from what you understood you weren’t as big of a target as Mori. Three days alone in a sterile bed was worth it for the survival of the organization.

At the end of it all, in the calm after the storm, sitting in your dorm, Chuuya visits you.

You don’t look too great, still recovering physically and emotionally, but you can’t find it in you to care. The second you hear the familiar cadence of his knock and the shuffling of his stupid heeled boots, you rip the door open and are met with his wide-eyed expression.

“Hey,” he says, and you burst into tears because god. It hasn’t hit you until now, seeing him in front of you, his warmth radiating from his hands as they reach out to hold you, but you could’ve died or he could’ve died and then what would’ve happened? Years and years of knowing each other, seeing each other at your worst, taking care of each other. Cooking in your kitchen and sleeping on his couch and kissing him like it meant nothing. It could’ve all been gone.

The mafia isn’t a safe occupation to begin with, but this entire thing has made you realize how fleeting everything is. So you sob, and you let him hold you and bring you to the couch, and you let yourself be weak.

“Hey,” he says again, tone now placating, gloved hands resting on the back of your head and between your shoulder blades as he sits next to you on the couch. You have no regard for where your body is right now, legs sprawled out somewhere beneath you and arms reaching up to grab at Chuuya’s clothes in any way you can. “It’s okay, baby. It’s okay.”

You cough wetly into his shoulder, a whine forming from between your violent sobs. Your body shakes with the remnants of your sickness and the exhaustion of the week and a small voice in the back of your head tells you that it’s embarrassing, that it’s unbecoming of a mafia executive to be so affected.

Death threats and poisonings and shootings—you deal with it every week. You choke out another whine of distress as you press the heels of your palms against your closed eyelids in an attempt to quell the tears. It doesn’t work. You’re still weak, no matter how hard you hurt.

“Shit, Chuuya,” you cough out a weak sob, shivers wracking your body as the weight of everything crashes onto you. “I was so sick. I was alone. I thought I would die. God.” You pull back from his hold to rub at your eyes with your raw palms.

“Stop that,” Chuuya says, with a gentleness you swear you haven’t heard in so long but in truth it’s been with you for the last two years. “You’re gonna hurt yourself.” Cold fingers wrap around your wrists and pull them away from your face.

The white-hot heat of embarrassment scalds the back of your neck. You feel like a scolded child with the pitying look he gives you, and with your hands locked between his there’s no way to hide.

“Stop,” you tell him, “quit it, Chuuya,” and you don’t know what you’re begging for, but it’s the lowest you’ve ever felt—a feared member of the mafia on their knees crying and asking for some kind of mercy.

“I wouldn’t let that happen,” he mumbles, and he pulls you just a bit closer with the grip he has on your hands. His chin rests on top of your head and you shove your face into the crook of his neck.

For once, he doesn’t smell like his gross luxury perfume. He smells like your laundry detergent and grass and the city and even more tears spill over your cheeks. Your fingers curl into his and you clench his knuckles until you feel them creak through the gloves.

“I wouldn't let you die,” Chuuya’s voice is no more than a whisper, but it’s the most determined you’ve heard him sound. “I wouldn’t let it happen.”

“I don’t need your protection,” and it’s a weak protest, and you’re grasping at straws to argue with him and push him away and make him stop before you make yourself sick with how hard you’re sobbing. You feel one hand slip from yours and slide up between your shoulderblades and start trailing along the nape of your neck, tracing circles in a lulling gesture.

“I know you don't,” he says, “but I would really like it if you let me. Just once in a while. Let me cook you soup alone and wash your face and clean your hair. All that stupid stuff.”

You cough out a weak laugh. Your househusband shtick from a year ago comes back to you, and so do all the warm evenings spent together in the kitchen and the kisses left on his cheek and the ones left on yours. You feel the warm press of his mouth against your temple and let out your last weak sob before you hold him tight again, squeeze him hard against you to make sure he’s still there. And that’s where he’ll stay.

#chuuya x reader #chuuya nakahara x reader #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #nakahara x reader #nakahara chuuya x reader #chuuya x you #chuuya nakahara x you #bsd oneshot #chuuya oneshot #bsd x you #bungo stray dogs x you #nakahara chuuya x you

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thequietkid-moonie · 1 year ago

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First off I would like to say thank your For your wonderful writing I really enjoy it.

Anyways can I get Hanako, Nene, Kou, Teru, With a warm hearted and exorcist S/O With powerful water and ice abilities

Kind S/O is a powerful exorsist based in water

[ HEADCANONS ] [ Hanako, Nene, Kou Teru ]

[ Toilet Bound Hanako-kun / Jibaku Shounen Hanako-kun ]

Uauauauaaaa thank u 🥺❤️ im so happy knowing that you like my writing so much!! Your words motivate me a lot to continue writing!! I hope you love this as much as I did

I keep it as just based on water, sorry for that

why this sounds so... Tanjiro?

Hanako-kun

Hanako is always so cheerful and friendly, even when he is pretty open with his feeling it actually take him a while to accept them and to accept to be in a relationship with you. You being a exorsist isn't a problem for him, at first was something that startled him but you had showed him so much kindness that he grows comfortable around you

Hanako tend to do a lot of jokes about you being are exorsist, about how even when being one you end up dating a supernatural, or how he probably had defeat you by stealing your heart, and so on, but even when he makes a lot of jokes he never underestimated you, he knows what you are capable of and he respects and admire your strength

Just as he loves making jokes about you being an exorsist he LOVES bragging about your strength, he will tell everyone who is willing to heard (and those who aren't too), he is always talking about how stronge you are, about your power and the techniques you just show/teach him, about how amazing you look, he is just too excited and in love to shut up

Speaking of, even when he knows you are really stronge (probably even stronger than him) that doesn't stop him from stepping in front of you and shield you whenever you two find an agressive supernatural. He knows you are stronge but he will hate for something to happen to you, he doesn't want to lose you

Is probably that at least once you will protect him from the attack of a supernatural (or Teru another exorsist), even when he is the leader of the mysteries that doesn't mean he can't be hurt, so when you are the one protecting him he feels completely flattered, he feels small and vulnerable in the way that he feels completely safe, like he doesn't have to be the stronge and powerful honorable 7th for once

Hanako doesn't know what he loves more of you, if your strength or your kindness, your power based in the water is one of a kind, even when fighting you can be as gentle and comforting as a pleasant breeze or be powerful and destructive like a tsunami, also, just as the water, you can easily adapt to your surroundings, quickly getting used to the battlefield and fighting with elegancy. Hanako is completely mesmerize by your fighting style and doesn't lose the chance to see you fight, admiring every move you do but still on guard to step in and protect you in case things get out of hand (however he doesn't accept that out loud, never, he only says that he was sure you will do it)

As if it wasn't enough you kindness is the perfect complement, your sweet smile and gentleness while treating him always make him flustered, it took him a while to get used to be treaten with such kindness and even when he felt like he was handling it you just accept him as he is, as the supernatural, as the assassin, and you did it with a smile in your face, he doesn't feel like he deserve it but he doesn't want to lose it either

Hanako is always being playfuly and clingy towards you, always making jokes and teasing you with everything he can, both of you always have a lot of fun, but there are also moments when he just want to be with you in silent, doing nothing but basking in your presence for how comforting it is for him, for how much peace brings him, for how it calms the cruel past that hurts him but isn't ready to talk about

Rainy days remind him of you (but also make him feel a little melancholy, even if you are in the school taking classes), specially the ones where is raining just a little, when is soft and gentle, he tend to stay out let the rain fall on his phantasmagoric body, it isn't like he will get sick anyways actually this is a lie, he gets sick sometimes for doing it, but he doesn't mind at all

Nene Yashiro

Yashiro constantly has crushes on people she finds atractive, normally are crushes that doesn't last long but are stubborn, it was almost imposible for her to don't fall for your kindness and beautiful smiles however the love she felt at first started to grow stronger and more sincere, to the point where it was sure to say that she was in love

Your warm hearted personality always manage to make Yashiro flustered, whenever you are being kind towards her Yashiro quickly gets blushy and flustered, things like offering her your hand and being willing to help her always make her feel special and loved, like if it were out of a romantic novel, although even little things like smiling when you see her or asking her about her day tend to make her heart skip a beat

Even when your kindness is something that Yashiro finds completely endearing and attractive she can easily get jealous over it, she likes whenever you are being kind towards others and other appreciating your kindness too, but it doesn't take much time before she start to feel jealous over it and the more time it past the more it affects her, she could go from feeling threaten for other people to feel insecure and compare herself with others, is pretty obvious that she feels down but she doesn't want to say it directly

Yashiro doesn't pry much details about you, specially at first, is more likely she will know more and more about you as the time pass, that is why is more probably that, if you don't tell her, she will find out about you being an exorsist when you two are dating already

She could get to know that you are an exorsist for seeing you fight or someone telling her, even as an accident, but no matter how she finds out it would be incredibly surprising for her, it would even take some reasurance for her to fully accept because for your personality she never thought that you will even fight anyone

At first Yashiro though that she was the one who brought you to the mess with the supernaturals and even felt bad about it but now that she knows that you are an exorsist (and a powerful one) she feels a lot better, even she start asking your help anytime she gets into troubles or hide behind you when is scare (something that make her feel a little embarrassed)

Yashiro doesn't think much about your power but as she find out that your fighting style is based in water she grows really curious, she has an idea of how it could be but want to see it herself (not that she will put herself in danger just to be able to see it)

Yashiro knows you are powerful but actually getting to see you fight is a whole new thing for her, she can only describe seeing you fight as if you were dancing perfectly, like if it were everything around you what change to follow your lead, doing it with so much elegancy and majesty that make her heart skip a beat, and from that day she looks up at you even more and is really flustered by it

She like to brag about you (even when she got teased and end up being a flustered mess for it) because you are perfect in her eyes, you aren't just incredibly kind but also incredibly powerful, she thinks she can't have a better partner

Kou Minamoto

Getting into a relationship with Kou won't be too difficult, if you two like each other he doesn't see why not, however he is quite flustered by being in a relationship, it would take him a while and even so there will always be something new that manage to make him flustered and blushy around you

Your kindness is something that make him fall for you almost imediatly, being so warm hearted make Kou feels comfortable around you almost imediatly and it doesn't pass much time before he actively search for your company. He isn't strange to kindness but, somehow, everytime you are directly kind towards him he feels special, it makes his heart feels faster because he just feels like if you were an angel

As well, Kou never feels jealous when you are being kind towards others, he actually likes seeing you show kindness and a sweet smile to everyone else, it makes him proud of who you are, and even more because he is dating you

Kou talks about you quite a lot, he can't just stop doing it and is a little embarrassed everytime someone point it out, but more whenever someone tease him for it (his friends and even his brother). He is proud of you as the person who you are but you being an exorsist, and a powerful one, make him even more proud and even make him feel honored of being your boyfriend

Is probably that he didn't know you are an exorsist at first (is more likely Teru is the one who knows) but even in that case it won't take him long to find out since he himself is an exorsist, when he get to know he doesn't underestimated you but treat you as an equal (unless someone tells him how powerful you actually are), so the moment he actually get to know your true strength he feels flustered but a little embarrassed, but that feelings are quickly replace by the excitement (if he gets to know by seeing you fight will be even more impressive for him)

Kou will ask you a lot of things about you being an exorsist out of excitment, he is so curious about your training, how long you have being an exorsist, with how many supernaturals you had fight with and how much you know about the supernaturals. Kou even compare your strengh with Teru's strength only because he says that you two probably are as stronge as each other (he mean it as a compliment, the only time Kou compare you to someone else is to praise you)

After Kou gets used to the idea he will treat you as always and not as some kind of superior when it comes to exorcism or supernatural, and, also, Kou will ask you if you could teach him some things about your own style because he wants to grow stronger

Kou is completely surprised when he gets to know that your style is based on water but he quickly grows incredibly curious, wanting to know how it works and wanting to see you fight. Kou is satisfied if you only explain him how it works or even let him see when you train, but actually seeing you fight it completely mesmerize him, he is normally protective over you, specially when it comes to supernatural, imediatly shielding you without a doubt but seeing you carry the fight is new to him and he love it

After the first time he sees you fight he will only grow more and more mesmerize and curious about your power, asking you more and wanting to see more of it. Soon he will know why it is based in the water, whit that incredible adaptability it has, not matter how it is the battlefield, big or small, filled of things or empty, you always manage to walk as if that place were your home and fight like if you were in the perfect scenario

As well, he is amased and shocked by how you handle your power, you can express your usual kindness in soft attacks that doesn't make suffer anyone or wipe out everything like a powerful hurricane

Kou is constantly praising you and openly telling you how proud he is of you, for your kind personality and for your strength, and he will never grow tired of it

Teru Minamoto

Getting into a relationship with Teru it would take a little bit of time and effort, even when he is always kind and charming all of that is mostly a facade, both has to be close friends first and he has to be able to feel comfortable enough around you before getting into a relationship. You being an exorsist it makes things much easier since is more likely you two had work together at least once and probably know each other for a while now

Teru loves your warm hearted personality, you're always willing to help others and offer a sincere smile, he finds it cute and endearing, even a little hilarious considering that you are a powerful exorsist, he loves watching you interact with others and showing that infinite kindness

Teru can get jealous easy but he doesn't show it much, normally tries to don't do anything about it, he is your boyfriend and that helps him calm down his jealousy, however when is too much he will step in and steal your attention from the others, but it could easily go unoticed since he does it with a smile and kind words, he always find the perfect excuses

Your kindness always manage to warm Teru's heart and that lead him to be protective over you, for his duty as an exorsist he had to give up many things and mature at an early age but being in a relationship with you despite everything makes him feel really happy and he wants to protect that, he sometimes end up underestimating you and sometimes thinks that for being so kind you are also inocent

More than once Teru had step in front of you to shield you from supernatural or try to be faster on attacking in order to protect you, he just want be able to protect you (and sometimes he likes to show off a little in front of you), he normally does it out of insist (due of being the main exorsist for so long too) if you complain and ask him to let you do your work he apologize for it and tries to hold back

Teru is intriged by your fighting style, he had been raised in the Minamoto Clan, following the tradicional fighting style of the family so he had never come across a fighting style based in water and he wants to learn from you, not exactly to use it but how it works. Teru finds it incredibly interesting but what he finds more amusing is seeing you use it

He admires your adaptability and how versatile you can be while fighting, that way you two to can fight together without much troubles, even become a powerful couple, and Teru is grateful for it for different reasons, he can be sure you are safe, he can spend a lot of time together and it makes things easier for him, he doesn't have to be the only one who carries the weight of being the strongest

But as much as he love your strength it also wakes in him an wish to challenge you, and he does whenever things are more calm or he knows is something you can easily handle

As well, as much as Teru loves your kindness and warm hearted personality he feels like is a waste of time whenever you show kindness towards supernaturals, even more when you do gentle but direct attacks while fighting, in his eyes the supernatural doesn't deserve that kindness and he isn't afraid of telling you his opinion right away, however he won't stop you from doing it if you really want

#jibaku shonen hanako kun #toilet bound hanako kun #jshk x reader #tbhk x reader #hanako kun #hanako x reader #yashiro nene #yashiro nene x reader #yashiro x reader #kou minamoto #kou minamoto x reader #kou x reader #teru minamoto #teru minamoto x reader #teru x reader #x reader #x gn reader #anime x reader #manga x reader

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chernychnyi · 1 year ago

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hello this is not a question but I Want to Be Anonymous so so … i just wanted to say that thank u so much for ur art esp for the goldfinch stuff (im very ovsessed with tgf rn) this is SUCH a big inspiration for me and i like to look at ur drawings again and again because they always cheer me up when im sad or feel like shit ? i like your sketchy kinda style because i think this is the most beautiful way to draw digital art and when its related to the things i love- its just a BOOm Amazing Combo

im sorry im not really into wording at the moment but yeah thank u thank you thank you ! so much !ty

Thank you so much for cheering me up in return!! I'm really flattered and happy, and I hope you have a wonderful day!

#the goldfinch #boreo #tgf #art tag

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youremyheaven · 5 months ago

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any tips on how to start dressing better?

id loveee to dress with a more artsy, feminine style (for context i study arts, so visual arts, music, dance, theatre, but also business in the arts!) and i love love love your style like its literally how id dress daily if i could. i love style inspos like that but i don’t know how to maximise outfits with a few pieces, especially girly fits. i also love certain boyish/male-dominated sports and when i watch or attend the events id like to dress girly-ish? but also dress “right”, so shorts and stuff because its SO HOT but a lot of the places i work and study at are also rich people places so i also want to fit in and be taken seriously (i say this like i dont maximise my young and sweet girl persona to get around sometimes but still) 🫤🫤 i love your style because its so feminine and romantic and sweet and classy and timeless and i dress like that at times…. not always because i don’t know how to maximise my pieces but i thought you’d know best 😓😓

hope you have a lovely day ahead!

general tips on finding your style: (I won't say "dress better" bc that's very relative and can mean so many different things although I completely understand what u mean in your context)

start making pinterest boards

it helped me soooo much in understanding what i was drawn to and the recurring/repeating motifs that showed up in the outfits i was inspired by

you can make several diff boards for diff occasions like "outfits for class" or "outfits for parties" and each can have a diff vibe that suits your needs

when we think of personal style very broadly, we tend to be overwhelmed so browse through pinterest and look at outfits for inspo and you'll have a realistic idea of what you'd like to wear

2. understand your body and vibe/essence

this is where Kibbe and Kitchener theories help the most but i feel like most people nowadays use it to beat themselves up for being a certain Kibbe type or being delusional about the kind of essences they have etc

however, if you have a good grasp of Kibbe/Kitchener, it makes dressing up 10000x times simpler,, my personal style has improved SOOO much since i discovered Kibbe & Kitchener in 2021-2022,,,

3. build a "uniform" for yourself

if u look at my style moodboards, u can see how most of the outfits are kinda similar ish?? they're either slip dresses, sundresses, maxi skirts + tops, midi skirts + tops and generally adhere to a pink + green/blue palette (i call it my strawberry shortcake color scheme hehe)

once u find what u like + what flatters u , stick to it tbh. its faaaar easier to get dressed if you know exactly what you're going for. its 100% more convenient and people are going to associate you with that look/aesthetic and i think its important to have a strong personal "brand" if u want to be distinct and memorable.

its even better bc if you ever wear something slightly different, people are going to lose their minds lol when all u did was channel a different vibe. its like a 0 cost makeover effect.

i think its economical, efficient, memorable and overall wonderful to build a personal "uniform" and stick to it

i can wear those outfits (from my moodboard) to class, to brunch, to dates, to shop etc,, they're very flexible and aren't overly dressy or overly casual.

i only buy something if i feel like i can wear it everyday, obviously some pieces are more dressy and are for "special occasions" but generally, dont buy anything you cant see yourself wear every single day.

im not saying you SHOULD wear it everyday but that, that should be the intention. clothes are meant to be worn and used, not just look pretty on the hanger. so when you're in the trial room, ask yourself, will i feel comfortable and cute wearing this everyday for a week straight if need be?

you can build a uniform for diff occasions too!! so sporty events can mean pink camisole with lace trims and cut off shorts with baseball cap and strawberry print Vans sneakers or some variation of that

4. maximising your pieces!!! (finally answering THE question u asked but we already know that i need to yap a bit to get to the point lmao)

i am a mix and match girlie and i think thats just the most efficient and economical approach to fashion lmao

take out everything in your wardrobe and lay it all out on your bed and start trying on different pieces together and take full length mirror selfies

create a folder in your gallery for "outfit ideas" and save these pix to that folder 😉

you can thoroughly clean out your closet and critically evaluate everything you own and play dress up and have fun all at once!! when you play around with clothes you own, you'll come up with outfit combos you would have never dreamt of and having them stored in your handy folder will help u access them quickly in the future when u have somewhere to go and need some ideas!!!

it will also help you understand what you have too little of and what u have too much of

maybe u have 10 pairs of pants and 5 skirts and only 6 tops,, now u know what u should and shouldnt shop for in the future

id never encourage unnecessary shopping but if your budget allows for it,, u can buy some "core pieces" that will be foundational to your wardrobe

anything can be worn a million different ways, u just have to be creative

understanding how colours work together + how fabrics work together is very beneficial

if u have a baby pink tulip skirt, u can wear it with a white corset top (pink and white look amazing together) ,, you can wear it with a white satin button down shirt, a white lace trim tank top etc etc,, notice how all of these are different styles of top wear but they're all white which means you can also wear it with any other colour or piece in your wardrobe

for every "standout/statement" piece your purchase (ex: a skirt with heavy embroidery or patterns) you should have 3 or more "neutral" pieces that complement it. "neutral" pieces are the ones that work with everything or most things in your wardrobe.

if you love monochrome, then u do u but otherwise id say buy pieces in colours you dont already have,,, u dont have to buy colours u hate but having pops of colour in your wardrobe also helps maximise outfits bc it looks like u have made more of an effort than u have.

many people hesitate to "wear" colour bc they think it looks loud or that it doesnt have repeat value or whatever but thats not true!! u can wear the same colourful piece thrice a week and style it completely differently and no one will notice

accessories ARE KEYYYY,, u can dress up or dress down a look with them. build a little collection of your staples, like jewellery u can wear everyday and not take off?? have a handful of essentials that u can rely on to spice up outfits. a pair of gold hoops, a pair of dangly earrings, a cute pendant, another cute pendant u can switch it up with, a few rings or bracelets, a watch etc u dont have to buy a lot or have a lot, u just have to be smart!!

same goes for shoes and bags,, have 2-3 in rotation that works with majority of your wardrobe,, nobody needs 10 pairs of shoes or bags tbh ,, dont hesitate to repeat things, it'll just be your "signature" look and who doesnt want a signature look?? 💅🏻😌😌

also since u mentioned u dont know how to maximise girly fits with a few pieces, I GOTCHU

its more efficient to invest in skirts and tops than dresses if u are on a budget bc a dress is an outfit in itself and u cant repeat it too often (u can get vvv creative with the styling tho ngl but thats for later)

im going to give you a very simple idea (?? ish?)

this is a very basic white tank top. it looks cuter and "feminine" bc it has lace trims. what makes an outfit feel more girly is often little details like this. so instead of wearing a basic tank top, pick something that is a bit frilly.

u can easily create an infinite number of outfits with this one piece

(i know they're not all wearing the same identical tank top but im just showing u the diff possibilities)

this is a pink satin skirt styled 3 ways:

u only really need a few pieces tbh and the rest is just wearing them in different wayyyyss

idk how helpful this was but ur so sweet 🥺🥺and im so happy u like my style hehe<333

hope u have a lovely day/night and i hope u have a lot of fun with fashion too <33

edit: also just take ur time, u don't have to fix everything overnight and spend money u don't have to buy things that aren't strictly necessary. this is a long term project and it may take months or years to have a solid capsule wardrobe full of pieces you can style and wear in interesting ways

#fashion inspo

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5eraphim · 2 years ago

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The vampire Demo Engie, Heavy, and Medic with a vampire hunter s/o was so good! You wrote it so well and like I imagined 🥰🥰🥰 could I politely ask u to finish with vampire Sniper, Spy, and Scout? Thank you so much ur work literally rots my brain 🥰🥰🥰🥰

Im so glad you enjoyed- it was so fun to write🌻🥺 for the sake of consistency, i decided to keep the reader gender neutral, also i apologize that Scout and Sniper's sections are kinda short, Sniper's always been weirdly hard for me to write tbh, but i really hope he feels "in character" enough, and I could only come up with a few ideas for vampire Scout- but that aside, thank you for the request!

LINK TO PART 1 🦇🗡️⚰️

Characters: Scout 🐇, Sniper 🦘, and Spy 🐍

Rating: M (MINORS DNI, THIS ISN'T FOR YOU)

Content Warnings: yandere, smut, exophilia, mind break, toxic relationship, hypnosis, primal kink, kidnapping/captivity, possessive behavior, stalking, bad ending, graphic depiction of gore (all of them really- but Spy's is probably the worst RIP)

Word Count: 4.4k

MASTER LIST

TIP JAR

(Song Inspo- Hunter's Moon, Ghost)

Scout, the Lost Boy

If there were any of the vampire mercenaries who would outright try to antagonize vampire hunters for the thrill of it, Scout would be the prime suspect. As a vampire, Scout would likely live much like the Lost Boys. Sleep all day, party all night; as far as he cares, the immortality granted to him is nothing but endless time to party and enjoy his eternal youth. So what if some hunters wanted to join the party? It's not like Scout was afraid they could really put an end to his fun.

Trying to poach Scout would be a more laborious challenge than you initially thought. On the outside, he might not look like he could put up much of a fight compared to the older vampires, the other mercs. While this may be true, Scout is far from helpless, and even if he's content to spend eternity partying and having a good time, he can be merciless like any creature of the night.

Scout has a territory he's claimed, a little spot his family once lived he holds onto. It's not much to outsiders, but it's sentimental to him, and Scout fights hard to maintain it. Though that doesn't mean he wants to stay in the same place forever and sees this more as a "home base" rather than a permanent estate. He likes to keep active and is also frequently on the move, endlessly looking for his next high, the next part, or his next meal; because of this, Scout's hard to predict, and trying to track him down and get a hit on him won't be easy.

While he's the youngest of the vampires, he's pretty social and likely heard about you butchering other vampires he knew before you decided to start hunting him. He might even begin to stay on the lookout for you to see if he can spot you before you catch him first. There's a decent chance he's never actually killed a vampire hunter, and he can't help but hope you'll be his first. Strangely the idea of being the one to end your life gives him just as much grief as exhilaration.

Vampires and hunters come and go quickly, given the bloody and violent nature of their lives, but even without really meeting you, Scout can't help but feel attached, and he can't stop wondering why he's so scared to think about you leaving without a trace like so many other hunters before. When you eventually decide to start pursuing him, Scout's more than excited to finally meet you in person, much to your confusion. A little nervous, but in a good way, like the feeling of reaching the top of a roller coaster before the rapid descent.

His excitement to meet you goes without saying, but maybe he also feels flattered to think you consider him dangerous enough to try and hunt down. Feeling like he's finally one of the "big bad" vampires now that hunters are going after him. Before the encounter, he'd been extra savage in the night, leaving bloody carcasses within the perimeter of his dwelling, hoping they would help lead you closer to him.

You knew he was arrogant and a show off from what you'd heard from other hunters. So when he came bounding over to you, effortlessly dodging your projectiles and bullets, telling you how excited he was to finally meet you after all this time, you were speechless. You saw him as nothing but a little easy target practice, a lightweight; you had no idea he'd become obsessed with you like this. Before now, you never thought of yourself as a professional-tier hunter, and the idea other vampires could pass your information along amongst themselves made you want to take out Scout all the more.

But as mentioned before, he's not so easy to take out, and the more time you spend fighting, you can't help but wonder if it's all worth it after all. The relationship after this would be a bizarre hunter-and-prey role reversal; the hunter, you, now forced to try and hide and escape from the vampire. However, with Scout's now supernaturally boosted speed and enhanced senses, you're further out of your depths than expected. The depth of the situation only really sinks in when you try to abort your hunt and flee his territory. Scout learned your hunting schedule quickly, immediately noticing when you didn't show up to your usual spot near his turf to hunt.

It wouldn't take long for Scout to begin to assume the worst here, thinking he was no longer good enough for you, thinking you'd run off to replace him with some other vampire. He couldn't bear the thought of it.

Once he managed to find you, Scout made himself known. You knew better than to let him get any closer. Scout's attacks were most effective when he could get right up in your face, so you cleared the area as fast as possible, thinking you narrowly managed to escape. Only to discover your home's shattered windows and a raw human heart on your doorstep, topped with a messily scrawled note letting you know exactly who your "surprise" visitor was. As well as warning you against going after any other vampires.

From then on, you were forced to constantly watch your back when stepping out of the house, afraid he could be hiding around the corner at any time, waiting to rush you by surprise. He might not be able to get in without being invited, but Scout would force you to live in endless paranoia. He was drawing closer only moments away from striking you again. And you both knew you couldn't hide forever.

Sniper, the Apex Predator

If Scout was a tricky vampire to hunt down because of his unpredictable nature and evasiveness, Sniper was even harder to hunt, though for entirely different reasons. Unlike the loudmouthed speedster, Sniper was an altogether different breed. He managed to elude hunters and stay on the prowl for his next kill by hunting from the shadows. Able to disappear without a trace on command, invisible to any other human or vampire. Sniper only went out in the dead of night and remained out of sight until the second he was ready to pounce, attacking with a predator's decisiveness ending the life of another in a matter of seconds.

To call him territorial would be an understatement. Sniper's land was his alone, and he didn't allow any to trespass. His dwelling held such a reputation for death most thought the ground itself was simply cursed; the idea of an individual, supernatural or not, was inconceivable.

Sniper genuinely was one of those once-in-a-lifetime apex predators. Able to extinguish the life of another with one bite, an attack so silent and sudden none of his prey lived to tell the tale. He was nothing less than the stuff of legends. A kind of beast with a legendary legacy of bloodshed, a traceless reputation, and a propensity for leaving behind no living witnesses. The idea of such a mythic vampire continuing to walk the face of the Earth on this day was too much for most to believe. No one knew how old Sniper was as a vampire, but no one knew much of anything about him, and he liked it that way. You must have been looking for a lot of trouble the day you decided to try and hunt him down.

Sniper might have been just an urban legend to some, but even if he wasn't precisely "believed in" by modern humans, people knew to stay away from his hunting grounds because of the superstition, the supposed "bad luck" striking all who stepped foot there. He was so used to having the hunting ground all to himself that the idea of another hunter out that night stalking him from behind never even crossed his mind. He couldn't remember the last time anyone managed to go undetected by him; if you were to handle such a feat, he'd never seen anything like that before. Sniper might have sensed something was a bit off that night but wouldn't investigate the area. His intuition didn't warn him of a human, and he reasoned if something did manage to get close, he would know by now. So when he caught you out of the corner of his eye, he froze for just a second. But just long enough for you to flee, disappearing from his land in the blink of an eye without a trace.

The following night, he'd be on high alert, wondering if you would return. He felt restless, Sniper was addicted to the isolation in a way, but you changed that, and he no longer felt at rest. Like you altered his home in a way he couldn't quite understand. Sniper couldn't tell if he never wanted you to step foot on his land again or if he needed you back right away to fix what you disrupted. He would wonder why you didn't return because you had your own land to protect and were a recluse like himself. Odd behavior for a human, but you evidently weren't quite a "regular human" yourself.

Surprisingly, Sniper would be more unnerved, almost curious rather than angry or hostile with you. Despite the brevity of the encounter, you still managed to get closer than any other living thing, and you seemed to awaken his need for companionship, his desire which lay dormant for so long and memories of life with family-other living intelligent creatures he thought he'd forgotten.

He could tell you were something like himself, something he'd felt for no prey before. A hunter, a slaughterer, yet He couldn't understand why you didn't rush him for the kill that night? The idea that you somehow were taken by him and spared him because of some illogical attraction made him blush for a moment before he forced himself to be realistic. You must've heard stories of how he could end the life of another in seconds, and he couldn't ignore the irritating disappointment as he realized you were likely only interested in saving yourself.

An eternity of looking over his shoulder, protecting his homeland, awaiting the moment other hunters would foolishly come along and try to sink their claws or teeth into him was all he knew for so long. Could he be blamed for hoping it didn't have to be like this forever? The only positive memories Sniper managed to hold on to despite how long ago it had been of the family he once knew a lifetime ago; it couldn't be a coincidence you awakened these memories. He needed you back, and he needed it before some other predator, someone below his caliber, came along and took you from him.

Unlike all the other vampires, he wouldn't be captivated by your humanity or the life within you; Sniper sees you as something different entirely. Something so like himself, you weren't suited to being human; if he could turn you into a vampire, he could give you the life you deserved, life as his companion. He would protect you forever if only you would let him.

While you weren't technically a monster like he was, you were still a murderer, an animal, and it was fate that brought the two of you together. His destiny is to turn you into a creature of the night, and yours to remain by his side until the end of time. He didn't usually step foot on his land, but he did so with a clear mission in mind the night he set out to track you down.

A sniper would stalk you, observing from afar, remaining invisible, undetectable while watching, doing everything in his power to keep his emotions from revealing himself. Sniper attached this image of a better future to you, becoming fixated, thinking you were meant to be his mate. What was the point of being the king of the land without someone to rule over and protect? Vampires didn't go through the circle of life like humans as they didn't age, Sniper would believe his time as a lone wolf was ending, and you were meant to become his mate, metamorphosing his lonely life into something better than before.

Spy, the Mastermind

It wasn't often a hunter would make the mistake of trying to hunt down and kill a vampire as powerful as Spy. While he might not have a reputation for lethality like Sniper, Spy was endowed with different abilities upon becoming a creature of the night, yet certainly not abilities any less powerful. Spy's gifts were almost all psychologically fueled as a vampire, and while his physical skills weren't too humble either, he hardly needed to use physical brawn when killing. Spy could make you see things, take control of your mind, and force himself inside your consciousness until you were nothing but a backseat passenger in your own body. Depending on the target, he could get a peak into their memories and use them to show the victim their greatest fear; nothing made a meal more appetizing to Spy than adrenaline and fear in the blood before he feasted.

Sometimes, victims weren't even fortunate enough to hold onto any self-awareness when he manipulated their minds. When he's really feeling spiteful, he will pick on the unlucky souls of those who happen to cross his path, getting inside of their minds and compelling them to carry out his will, manipulating their bodies like a puppet on strings. No one knows what happens to the victim's mind after Spy takes complete control, but the morbid carcasses on the sidewalks discovered the following day covered in gore keep most from wanting to know more.

If he wanted to, Spy could kill off his prey in seconds, keep his hands clean and remain undetectable. And when it came to no menial everyday feeding, this would sometimes be his method of execution; he might be on the thinner side, but given his immense power, he required a great deal of blood to sustain himself and couldn't go long without human's blood before weakness began to set in. But he was too proud and merciless a killer to deny himself a bloody spectacle every now and then.

Spy resented humans and any vampire he deemed weaker than himself, as in virtually all of them. He saw them as the kind of beings which clung to the coattails of stronger predators to stay alive, nothing but leeches and parasites before lions such as himself. He was relentlessly diligent and efficient when killing off hunters and wanted their deaths to be a mortifying ordeal.

Spy would leave his victims not only horrifically gored and splattered to stain the streets for days to come, but he would cruelly torment his prey by leaving their corpses in such a fashion the cause of death often appeared to be suicide or accident. As though they and their blood weren't even edible to him, good to mix with the dirt in the streets and nothing more. Only the most skilled hunters could parse through the carnage and viscera to identify his handiwork, a task far too grim for most. But not for you, though you had a greater motive to study and track Spy than most.

You were exactly the type of prey Spy found to be the least appetizing. You weren't a highborn socialite; you didn't have any kind of generational wealth or inheritance, possessing little more than the clothes on your back. Even to other humans, your type wasn't paid much attention, and neither were their corpses left in the streets in pools of their own blood, flies, and maggots already riddling the bodies. But even though you lacked money or culture, you made up for it with loyalty and grit, and you weren't about to sit by and let this monster get away with taking the lives of those you loved.

Even if Spy didn't know who you were or that it was your friend's blood he painted the streets with, you were patient, and your vendetta gave you all the focus you needed to study him like a hawk. To remain vigilant until you're ready to go in for the kill and fight to avenge all the lives of the "scum of the streets" taken by the vile monster.

Knowing his attacks were psychologically centered, you honed your defenses the best you could, making your mind impenetrable. Snatching up every protective item you could use to get any possible advantage in the fight. By now, you were motivated by your hatred for Spy, he was a petty coward, fighting from a distance, lurking in the night, finding it more rewarding to watch his victims hurt themselves than shed their blood with his own hands, but you didn't dare underestimate him.

When you confronted him for the first time, he was taken back to discover he couldn't actually manage to get inside your head as he often could. You trained with humans you knew to be psychically adept, and though you were technically powerless, your training was about to pay off, giving you a shield from his prime mode of offense. Because of this strategy, the fight was painfully prolonged, you were better defended than any other, but your attack was far from as potent. As a result, neither your nor Spy's offensive attacks did much good against the other and were forced to exchange blows, waiting to see whose stamina would give out first.

Likely the looming threat of the rising sun would cause Spy to force himself to retreat, using the last of his strength to escape and recoup his stamina until he was ready to take you on again. While your vendetta gave you the power to fight, Spy fought back primarily because of his bruised ego. Who were you to come and challenge him like this? Some low-born nobody is trying to make a mockery of him! Someone needed to put you in your place, and Spy knew he needed to be the one to do it. If you thought you were so tough to put up a fight against a real vampire, he would need to make your fear overtake your hatred. While Spy couldn't get inside your head as he could with most prey, he could still easily detect your loathing, and for a patient such as yourself, he couldn't help but find it quite enticing. Perhaps he could work up an appetite for a street rat like you after all.

The next time the two of you met, you couldn't ignore how he clung to the shadows far tighter than before. Spy sulked just out of sight and maneuvered silently rather than facing your head, you forced yourself to ignore the sound of his voice inside your head, but now that you couldn't hear it, you felt far less prepared. Moments when you could listen to his voice, it sounded nothing like before; his gruff, confident voice softened into an almost gentle purr, sounding almost lullaby-like rather than hypnotically attractive.

He would croon to you, "I can fight you like this forever; you know your defeat is guaranteed; why don't you be a good little human and sit still while I slit your throat? I can give you such a painless, swift death. Doesn't that sound good?"

Hearing him uncharacteristically faking compassion felt like a calculated attack you couldn't decipher. Nevertheless, you reminded yourself not to listen but to keep your face up, hand close to the level of your eye, ready to strike. Though at moments like this, when you could feel all your muscles almost painfully strained, prepared to attack, the silence felt all the worse. The silence was harder to deal with, but you knew it was a thousand times better than letting him get inside your head.

But Spy was ready to up the ante. Earlier, he remained out of sight, silent and like a ghost, but he grew bolder, making fleeting contact with you while your back was turned. Not enough to actually hurt you, but enough to send your paranoia through the roof.

His fingers brushed up against the back of your knee; you whipped around but saw nothing there, only to feel your heart sink and skin crawl as you felt his hands draw higher, no matter how you tried to wriggle free and turn to see behind you, he was faster.

A palm to the side of your thigh, his knuckle skimming the curve of your waist, you could even swear you felt breath against the back of your neck, altogether invasively close yet still out of sight. The juxtaposition made you whimper in fear. Your despair was rising considerably as you caught your reflection through the glass of a window only to see no one behind and a fear you hardly recognized etched across your own face.

You felt so small, alone, and terrified, like nothing more than a child wandering out at night, afraid the boogeyman was about to get you. But his attacks were relentless; while you were stable enough to keep him from controlling your mind, he tortured you, showing you all the dead bodies of your friends slaughtered before now, their final screams echoing through the silent streets. The sound of his wicked laughter around seemingly every corner as you ran in circles. No matter how hard you mentally screamed, none of it was real; the fear took control all the same.

Out of the corner of your eye, you passed a corpse, identical to yourself, under a street light, Spy standing motionless over the carnage. You couldn't help but freeze up, unable to look away from the sight before you, retching at the view. Your body was twisted grotesquely, blood leaking from deep gashes, hunks of skin separated from the rest of you, some detached entirely, yet some clung to your mangled corpse stubbornly. Your clothes were mostly torn off, hanging off your body in ribbons, dampened by your blood, and unable to conceal the entrails which peaked through the holes in your flesh and clothes. All the while, Spy merely stared back at you, smiling, bearing his fearsomely sharp teeth, his hands, and the bottom of his face coated in your blood which caught the light of the streetlamp.

He extended a land in your direction, as cordially as a dancer inviting his partner to a pas de deux, bowing slightly as he beckoned you closer, arm still outstretched, but the sight of him drawing closer, no matter how subtly, was precisely what you needed to force your legs to work again and tear yourself away from the view before you.

Before, you were so blinded by hatred having every confidence it was enough to carry you through the fight, but as you tore through the dark alleyways, you felt utterly helpless. You didn't even consider falling victim to your own fear, but after a few more agonizing hours of this cat-and-mouse game, you could fight no longer and were about to flee. Exactly as Spy planned.

There was nothing in your mind but fear, and it was all too easy for Spy to corner you, pinning you to a wall, your wrists in his, forced with crushing strength to remain fixed in place to the wall behind. Spy regarded the sight before him with malicious pride, the once fearsome, resilient vampire hunter shaking as you wept, "Don't hurt me, I don't want to die! Please don't kill me!" Tears rolled down your cheeks through your squeezed-shut eyes, your breath choppy, broken up by coughs and messy sobs. Yet, despite everything, Spy felt his heart throb slightly as he looked at you, so helpless and powerless, your fear more delectable than anything he'd encountered before tonight.

Spy released your wrists, and you instantly hugged yourself tightly, not daring to try and run, and for just a moment, he allowed you to catch your breath, enjoying your cute whimpers and struggling to regulate your frantic breathing. Then, he took your face in his palms, forcing you to look into the depths of his eyes, thumbs wiping away a few tears as he worked his hypnotic charm against your mind.

"You're all right now, don't cry. No one will hurt you, not while I'm here. You're safe, so long as you obey me, understand? You've been out all alone all night. Are you ready to come home, pet?"

At some point, your eyes drifted from his eyes to his lips as he spoke, your anxieties lifting as you could think of nothing but the sound of his voice, nodding in agreement as you listened intently to everything he said. Allowing your mind to go blank, unable to think of anything but the man before you. All you needed to do was obey. Obedience would keep you safe, or rather he would keep you safe. Nothing in the world mattered other than following Spy home.

Spy knew he couldn't let you go after you managed to get away once before, and even if he did kill you upon the second encounter, it was still too risky. For all he knew, you were out telling all your little low-born friends how you managed to escape, how to keep his mind games at bay, and strategizing to fight as a pack the next time around, and he couldn't risk others gathering the courage to rise up against him like that. Still, he knew death was no fitting end for someone like you; he had something more intimate in mind for your demise.

From that night on, you were kept in his estate, a possession forbidden from leaving the castle grounds. You wore a collar around your neck, and your mind kept in a totally broken state. Forced to demean yourself and live out the rest of your eternity as an immortal servant to the undead demon you once hated more than anything in life. You were kept like his own little lap dog to amuse himself as well as his guests. Spy felt so proud of you; now there was finally something to show all of the lowly human hunters who tried to fight off vampires how to find a way to be useful after all. All while you smiled and fed from the palm of his hand.

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azullumi · 2 years ago

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Hii, I recently started following your blog and am absolutely in love with your writing! I'm in awe with how you both portray the characters and describe their feelings.

I wish you all the best in your academics!

What do you think about going on a first date with Kaveh?

summary — kaveh and his first date anxieties.

pairing — kaveh/gender-neutral reader

tags — fluff, established relationship, not proofread ; headcanons

words — 920

note — i was supposed to have a different approach on this one but before i knew it, i ended up revolving everything on kaveh but then rereading the ask, i'm glad i did. but anyways! im glad that u love my writing, nonnieee <33 thank u so much for the sweet words and i hope you'll like this! i settled on headcanons so that its easier for me to write and convey the ideas haha

"Do you want to go out sometimes? Maybe for a meal? Oh, wait, I mean, uhh—I just thought it would be nice if we could see each other on days that we are free."

He was the one to initiate an invitation to go out with you even if he just said it out on a whim, a sudden slip of his tongue—as if he hasn't dreamt of taking you out to eat a meal together with you, walk around the city while maybe holding hands, watch the Zubayr Theater's performance for that day, and everything that he wishes.

He's nervous, extremely nervous and anxious. The usually confident and proud man has been reduced to nothing but a small figure of anxiety but honestly, who wouldn't be? Going out on a date with someone who they genuinely and sincerely like, who wouldn't feel uneasy? It was only just the starting point of your relationship and he's only just experiencing his every firsts with you and he wants to make each one of it special.

Even if he has everything already planned out—including the words that he will say and the route that you two will take as he just wants to make sure that everything will go right—he still feels skittish. What if something goes wrong? God, he just wouldn't be able to handle it.

He spent days preparing for the event, the place that you two will have a meal on, what you will do afterwards, and the place of scenery he will take you to right before the day will end. In short, he's very attentive.

He'll also try on several outfits for the occasion, bringing out the clothing he kept hidden that are only to be used on important events. He just can't go out with you with the set of clothes he wears on a daily basis, can he? It's a special day, a date, to be exact.

Despite the feeling of fear and anxiety filling up his mind, he's still excited and looking forward to the day of the date. He ponders on what you would wear, how you will smile, how you will react upon seeing the things that he did and prepared for you, what will you say, and everything. It feels like falling in love and admiring you from afar all over again, as if he went back to the times wherein the two of you weren't still together and you were the only one in his mind as he wonders about every single thing about you—though it's not like he doesn't fall in love over and over again in his every day with you.

And then the day came.

“Kaveh!” “Don’t run, (Name)!”

If he hadn’t been holding on to the thin thread of his sanity and balance, he would have fallen on his knees because of how weak he feels after seeing you dolled up. Expect to be showered with compliments and being flattered by him in every moment—he just could never get enough of how lovely and attractive you look and he wants you to know it.

He’ll proceed with the plans that he laid out for the day inside his head and though you couldn’t say that it went by smoothly, everything was definitely perfect and amazing for you. Every moment, every second you spent with him felt magical and didn’t fail to put a smile on your face the whole time you were with him—seeing your delighted expression and cheerful demeanor made him feel proud and pleased for himself.

The first date wasn’t simply just to increase the intimacy and closeness between you two but to also get to know what you like, what you favor, and what you prefer the most over anything so each time he sees you happy and pleasant over something—like your attention being caught by a certain figure or object in the street and being struck by it— he takes a mental note and makes sure to not forget it.

Throughout the day, you two were close to each other and were even either holding one another’s hand or you had your arm linked with his as you walked around. Outside, he may appear that he’s fine and cool with it but inside he is actually screaming and having an inner monologue fight with himself about what he should do: if he should squeeze your hand or pull you much closer to him or if he should just let you be.

He doesn’t want to part ways with you when the day ends and the date has come to its conclusion and as much as he tries to lengthen and stalls the time he gets to spend with you, he still has to say goodbye in the end. However, give him a quick kiss on the cheek, forehead, or wherever you wish before you two part and he will have a stupid grin plastered on his face as he walks back to his home.

He doesn’t rest but rather thinks of where you two will have a date next, staying up all night while staring at his ceiling and daydreaming of you. Perhaps a picnic in the forest in the afternoon while you two wait for the sun to set would do or maybe going to a spot with beautiful scenery like a lake he found hidden in the forest that looks so magical with the crystalflies and butterflies fluttering their wings around the area? Nevertheless, he’s looking forward to it all.

#yae publishing house #kaveh x reader #kaveh genshin #kaveh #kaveh headcanons #kaveh x you #kaveh fluff #genshin impact #genshin impact fanfics #genshin impact headcanons #genshin x reader #genshin fanfic #genshin headcanons #genshin imagines #genshin fluff #genshin #genshin impact x reader #genshin x you #azul.writes

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pjsk-writin · 2 years ago

Note

hello amiaaaa i hope you're doing well~ im here for another request! as always, take all the time you need, ok?

anyway i request rui and tsukasa with a reader who has a crush on them and they like to secretly leave home-made baked treats on their table everyday (they say the way to someone's heart is through their stomach after all LMAO) maybe they even come with little notes to cheer them on for the day! also!! if it's not too much can you include a part where reader couldn't make it to school one day so now they're wondering where their daily treats went D: up to you if they realize who the reader is~

you seem so lovely btw and you write so well so i think i'll be a regular here, can i be anon 🌻 if it's not taken yet?

hihi, I hope you're doing well too !! and this was super cute to write, and waaa ty !!! ik we've talked before this but welcome aboard 🌻 anon, and i hope u like this ! <3

♡ TREATS FROM A SECRET ADMIRER - Rui Kamishiro and Tsukasa Tenma x Reader

Rui:

If there's one thing that Rui isn't used to, it's the idea of having a secret admirer. Most people could barely tolerate his existence, but the fact that someone admired him to the point they'd bake for him...It was unheard of!

He thought it was a pleasant accident when he found the baked treats on his desk. Perhaps someone had left them for the wrong person?

However, when they quickly became a daily thing, he couldn't help but feel...a tad flustered

Someone went through the trouble of baking treats just for him, and it was clear that they were a really good baker

He might have been flustered by the baked treats, but once his secret admirer leaves notes? Oh gosh, he feels like he could melt

Each note was full of a loving sentiment that he was not quite used to. Even a simple "I hope you have a good day!" makes his heart flutter

Was it weird to be falling for a faceless stranger? Maybe, but he couldn't bring himself to care

It was him falling for his secret admirer that caused his concern when there were no treats one day. Or the next day. Or the one after that

He hoped his secret admirer was okay, maybe he should try to come early to see if they were back?...

He always wanted to meet them, just to see how wonderful they were face to face. So, he makes it to school early that day, and finds you

You had gotten sick, and almost felt bad that you weren't able to leave Rui his usual treat and note. So, you decided to give him an extra treat today

What you weren't expecting was an all too familiar chuckle behind you. You froze, slowly turning to see the one person you never wanted to see you

He grins, stepping closer to you before glancing at the treats you had laid on his desk. "Ah, it's lovely to meet you, my secret admirer."

Tsukasa:

Tsukasa prides himself on being a future star, which is why the thought of having a secret admirer makes him incredibly flattered! Especially one who left him treats, it was absolutely wonderful!

He was shocked at first when he found the treats on his table, but it was definitely a pleasant surprise! They tasted wonderfully too!

He was even more pleasantly surprised when he discovered that those treats were left for him daily!

Not only were they the best baked treats that he had ever tried, he was also happy that someone recognized his stardom!

Once his secret admirer starts leaving him notes, he feels absolutely wonderful! Each note gives him just the boost of confidence that he needs to get through the day!

Even messages that are as simple as, "I hope you have a good day!" motivate him quite a lot! He wishes to leave his secret admirer his autograph as thanks <3

He was falling for his admirer, but how could he not? They seemed wonderful, the perfect co-star material!

He takes notice of the things that happen to his loved ones, which is why he grows concerned once the treats stop coming in for a couple of days. What happened to you?

This simply would not do! He wished to check up on his secret admirer, but he never learned their name. Perhaps he should ask around?

No no, he always found that learning things on his own always worked better. He decides that he'll come to school early, just to see his secret admirer and make sure they were alright

You were sick for a couple of days, and felt very upset that you couldn't drop some treats off for Tsukasa like usual. You decided to give him more than usual that day

As you laid the treats out neatly on his desk, you heard an all too familiar gasp behind you. Turning around, you find the very person you admired staring at you with a wide grin

He laughs with excitement, walking up to you and asking if he can hug you. Whether you hug him or not doesn't change his reaction, "My lovely admirer, how wonderful it is to finally meet you!!"

#pjsk x reader #project sekai x reader #rui kamishiro x reader #kamishiro rui x reader #tsukasa tenma x reader #tenma tsukasa x reader #🌻 anon

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natsury-kazuki · 1 year ago

Text

Valentine Card 2023

Hey, like every year there are Valentine's Day cards, this post will be updated as I find the cards, feel free to send me the missing cards! Enjoy - 06.11.23

HEARTSLABYUL

My dear friend─

Riddle Rosehearts : Not found yet

Hello friend ─

Trey Clover : Not found yet

Eyyy, friend!

Sweets aren't normally my jam, but the ones you

picked out were PERF─and they looked great

too! You must've put in some WORK picking

them out.

So, thanks! I'll make sure to do the same for you!

Cater Diamond

My good friend─

Thanks for the amazing gift! You got me those

mega-popular sweets we just talked about, right?

They were so good! It's kind of a shame I ate them

all.

Have you had any? I guess it'd be weird if I gifted

you the same thing, but come shopping with me

sometime and we can pick out some sweets for you.

Deuce Spade

Heya, pal─

I kinda freaked when I saw you left a present at

my door─in a good way! You actually sent me

sweets! You could've just given them to me in

person, you know.

I haven't had any yet, but I'm sure they'll be

great! We should share them at lunch tomorrow.

Ace Trappola

SAVANACLAW

Hey─

You gev me SWEETS? I swear, sometimes I

don't know what goes through that noggin of

yours.

I'll be nice and say I appreciate the

sentiment...this time. But don't expect any

glowing food reviews.

Leona Kingscholar

Welp─

Ruggie Bucchi : Not found yet

Hi.

Jack Howl : Not found yet

OCTANIVELLE

My boon, companion─

Thank you for the heartfelt gift. I suppose I owe

it to you to partake of these sweets. Don't worry.

Once I've analyzed the flavor, I'll gift you

something equally delicious.

After all, fair's fair.

Azul Ashengrotto

My good friend─

You've outdone yourself. Sweets that pair well

with black tea? My deepest thanks. I'm flattered

that you thought of me so when selecting them.

You've inspired me. I'm going to spend my

mountain hhikes pondering just the right tea

blend to suit your palate.

I do hope you'll enjoy it.

Jade Leech

Dear little shrimpy─

I saw your present. You got me candy?

That rules! I saw JUST in the mood for

something sweet. I might not be tomorrow

though, so I think I'll polish them off today.

Thanks.

Floyd Leech

SCARABIA

To my dear friend─

Thanks for the present! What colorful and

sparkly sweets. They look delicious!

I just had an idea! How about we eat them

together after school? Gifts like this taste better

when shared, after all.

I'll pick out a good tea to go with them. Can't

wait to see you later!

Kalim Al-Asim

Hello─

I was suprised to see you gifted me sweets.

At first I wondered if you were hinting for me to

make you something similiar... But when I pulled

the gift out of the bag, I saw all the details you put

into it, right down to the ribbon. It's clear this was

a heartfelt gesture.

I'll treasure these treats as I eat them. Thank you.

Jamil Viper

POMEFIORE

Dearest friend─

Thank you for the gift. The sweets were dazzling

and most attractive.

Did you try to imagine what I'd like when

picking the out?

If so, you made an apt choice.

I'll have something for you later in return.

Vil Schoenheit

Bonjour, and merci beaucoup!

What a lovely batch of confections!

They're so darling that I'm tempted to stow

them away in a brilliant bejeweld box.

Ah, but I jest. I'll enjoy every morsel of this gift

you've so thoughtfully bestowed upon me.

Rook Hunt

Dear classmate─

Epel Felmier : Not found yet

IGHIHYDE

@YOU

huh? What the wha?

im low-key scared here

why would u give me sweets???

ig that sometimes i run low on sugar when ive been

gaming too long and my aim becomes trash...

ok sure, if this is ur way of looking out for me,

ill take it

Idia Shroud

Hello, Perfect─

Ortho Shroud : Not found yet

DIASOMNIA

To my dear friend ─

Thank you. Never did I envision someone

presenting me with the gift of sweet treat.

It would be a shame for me to eat them all by

myself. Ithink I'll share them with you.

Would you be willing to provide the tea to go

with them ?

Malleus Draconia

Greetings!

Your present was delightful.

The treats had a sublte sweeteness that was

perfect for a slightly mature fae like myself.

I'll be making you a lovely treat in return,

I hope you'll enjoy it.

Lilia Vanrouge

Salutations─

Thanks for the gift. I read once that suger can

boost your concentration.

Did you gave me these to snack on when

I'm about to nod off during my studies?

That was very considerate of you.

I think I'll try them out today.

Silver

Human─

Sebeck Zigvolt : Not found yet

NRC STAFF

Dear esteemed student─

Dire Crowley : Not found yet

Dear juvenile─

Mozus Trein : Not found yet

Dear pup-

Is this gift for the staff? Excellent. Now that I

have some treats to sweeten my breaks, I'll be able

to grade your exams with a much more critical eye.

I can see the grimace on your face now.

Relax, it was a joke.

It's usually frowned upon for dogs to be the ones

buying gifts, but since you're suche a loyal pup,

I'll let you off. I'm generous trainer, after all.

Divus Crewel

Dear student─

Ashton Vargas : Not found yet

Yo, little imp!

What is UP? Thanks so much for the gift!

You've got a real eye for quality.

I'll make sure to stock up on goods that'll pique

your interest, so swing by the shop soon!

Sam

OTHER

Dear hench-human─

Mraaah! Is this ALL for me?!

I've never seen such sparkly, yummy-lookin'

candy before! I feel like a king!

But I'd feel bad leavin' you out of this sugar

extravaganza, so I GUESS you can have a small

piece. I'm lookin' forward to more gifts, partner!

Grim

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kokosnusslos · 4 months ago

Note

BRO I WANNA KNOW HOW LONG YOUVE BEEN DOING ART FOR CUZ AAAAAAAAAAAA IM IN LOVE WITH EVERY LINE YOU MAKE!!!!! Any resources, tips & tricks, general wisdom you have for fellow artists? :) your dynamic poses and perspective are so impressive ;7;

hey ahhh thank you so much i appreciate it!! i honestly drew my entire life but ive taken it seriously for 7 yrs id say? and for advice... i'd say keep drawing what you love and you'll always improve at art even if you dont really focus on improving yourself. as long as you draw it'll come naturally. however, i do recommend art videos such as the ones from sinix design and if u wanna go further some art books.

im flattered by your comment and i hope you have a wonderful day ^_^ also i love your name btw haha

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rowretro · 11 months ago

Text

✧𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐍 𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍✧

WARNINGS: none I think-

✧CHAPTER 3✧

The next day went by silently. All Heeseung knew, was that Jooyeon broke her heart and she drank and got high out of her mind. He didn't know about the harassment, all he heard was that a gang fight took place in a bedroom, and 5 men were killed. Sunghoon was just such a perfect actor. Not even y/n rememberred...

She woke up to find Sunghoon asleep on the sofa in her room. Why was he there? well he was simply installing extremely secret cameras around her room, but y/n didn't need to know that. As far as she's concerned, the latter only stayed behind to take good care of her, and make sure she was ok. Now that was rather flatterring.

Sunghoon stayed for breakfast then left, leaving the girl to Heeseung "Im so glad we don't have to put up with that rockstar wannabe anymore" Mrs Lee pointed out as Heeseung sighed "mom... i get he's a dick but maybe now is not the time... its 9pm and she's still all sad and quiet" Heeseung pointed out as the woman smiled at him. "Oh Heeseung... I know its hard to see her like this but... love is a lesson... all people need to experience some pain you know?" the woman pointed out as she hugged the boy, proud of how protective he is over his dear sister.

Heeseung silently took a seat beside y/n who sat by the window looking outside, glancing at her phone every now and then. "Miss him?" the male asked as y/n turned to him, teary eyed "I-I just keep hoping I'd see his car.... I really miss that car" y/n admitted as she rested her head on his shoulder. "I know... you spent most of ur time with him in that car when you sneak out" Heeseung pointed out "You knew?" "Of course I knew... I see it all the time... it's a good thing you feel this way because you feeling hurt is a reminder that this was a relationship worth having" Heeseung explained.

The night went by with y/n crying in Heeseung's arms, then the male leaving her on her bed. Jooyeon was finally out of the picture, now its time for Sunghoon to win her heart, slowly but surely it will happen. Sunghoon smirked as he watched her sleep peacefully through the camera, that think, silk cami night gown being the only thing covering her body, her cheeks slightly glossy with a few drying tears, the way she snuggled into the pillow beside her as if it were her husband... as if that pillow was him.

The following morning y/n was stuck being home alone, with dear Sunghoon to babysit her. Just him and y/n home alone. God these people trusted him way too much. "Sunghoon- do u want marshmallows?" the girl called from the kitchen "Sure I don't mind" he replied. Smiling, the girl climbed onto the kitchen counter and opened the cupboard, practically balancing on the edge.

As she got a hold of the packet, she felt herself slipping off the counter, "OH SHIT-" she yelped, realizing that her life was basically on the line. Out of no where, Sunghoon caught her in time, the girl in his arms as he stared down at her. He carried her to the sofa "If you couldn't reach you should've asked!" He sternly said as y/n could only nod. Oh her heart... she's never been this close to Sunghoon before. His plush lips, perfectly sculpted face, the way his hair strands fell in place, those eyebrows, sexy beautiful eyebrows, that nose she'd always wish she had, and to finish the look, those perfect moles that god splattered onto his face.

Oh he was such an angel. Sunghoon noticed that look in her eyes, his arms around her waist as she set her down slowly, but she never pulled away, she was too focused on him. His arms resting on the bare skin of her waist, as she wondered how lucky she was to have someone this pretty be there for her 24/7. Her brother's pretty best friend, who was such a sweetheart, was really doing something to her heart.

It was all too easy for Sunghoon, she's so naïve. She knew he was a demon, but she didn't make such a big deal out of it, why would she? he was nothing but sweet to her family and he caused no harm, as far as she's concerned. She doesn't know what hides behind that innocent, warm smile... a hungry monster waiting to pounce on her, and keep her all to himself...

✧𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐍 𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍✧

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fatalitysficbakery · 1 year ago

Note

hey bae, idrk how to request stuff its been a long time since i have !

but i was wondering if i could request an elle greenaway x reader where they supposedly ‘hate’ each other at work but theyre actually dating and they act like that to avoid suspicion and elle gets caught in a like shooter thing and then she gets back safely (based on that b99 episode w rosa)

or if thats too detailed idk,, just the last bit, ‘elle gets caught in a like shooter thing and then she gets back safely (based on that b99 episode w rosa’

idk if this makes sense i wqs daydreaming abt it in the car earlier and i am so sleep deprived rn idek if im making words right

so sorry for how long this is i love the elle fic u posted 07.10 !! im sleel now im fallimg aslepp

𓆰♡︎𓆪 What Goes On In The Dark. —

Elle Greenaway x Black Fem!Y/n

genre: angst/fluff.

warnings: hostage situation, mentions of violence, blood, and shot wounds. JJ is a profiler here. Liaison!Y/n, grief, mentions of suicide, gun violence, nothing too graphic.

synopsis: i’ll love you till the very end, amor.

a/n: i hope you enjoy my take on this request, lovely!

↳ 𓆰 Fatalitysficbakery navigation menu 𓆪

↳ 𓆰 Fatalitysficbakery criminal minds menu 𓆪.

↳ ❝Don’t let last words be ones to regret.❞⁣ -Unknown

⌫

Quantico, The Behavioral Analysis Unit was always my goal from the very start, I'd walked into the double doors of the place on my first day bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, all the whilst every horror imaginable lay beneath.

There was a lot to dislike about the place, the bureaucracy the most damning flaw of all, It was a tangled mess that the agents had to deal with, to remember why you're there was to do your job well.

Elle Greenaway and I were alike in that way, we wanted to help the world be a safer place, I remember our first meeting, she'd welcomed me to hell. Her piercing brown eyes stared me down, scanning me as if she could see right through to my soul.

The blush that kissed my skin that day was embarrassing and exciting all at once. She'd find ways to talk to me, excuses to come to my office. The new liaison. I'd let the team know my doors were open at any point in time, and God did she ever abuse it. Suddenly pencils regularly disappeared from her desk. Could she use one of mine? Did I have a stapler? Hers was empty.

It was...flattering.

I couldn't lie, the agent had piqued my interest from the start. A smooth talker with a quick tongue. Clever. Amazing at her job. Just my type, you could consider me charmed from day one. She had me in the palm of her hand.

From there it was inevitable, I was hers.

Again, the ladder of the BAU was a tough one to work around, the night we finally hooked up, it was under the guise of me not having a ride home from work. My car was in the shop...The same one that was parked just in the garage parking lot, furthest space away from the other's eyes.

That night, staring into puddles of hazel brown, brunette locks tickling my skin; I knew I'd developed an addiction, and god was it a euphoric one.

↳

When we made it official, Elle gave me a locket, heart pendant with a picture of us in it. We'd agreed to keep it on the down low until we knew how to break it to Strauss and the rest.

That's when Operation: Become The Enemy started. Pretend to be absolutely revolted by one another at work, disappear into our own little world when alone.

It was a riot trying to pretend I hated the woman, hell, she drove me insane in all the best ways. She was my drug.

God, was she ever.

Being snapped back to reality tends to ruin all fantasies.

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

The BAU was my dream. My goal from the start. I wanted to be here, I wanted to be here.

My chest felt tight, my every limb aching the moment Hotch cleared it. Allowed her to go inside. Why did it have to her? Why did she have to be the hero?

It's our job, I know. I repeated that to myself so many fucking times whilst watching her put on that damned bulletproof vest which did nothing to silence my worries. — Every other part of her became fair game.

My chest hurt, my breathing sped up. Everything blurred. Before long I was being escorted to my seat by a worried JJ, I couldn't even tell her the reason I was so upset. I felt myself drowning, sorrow encapsulated my entire being, paralyzing me with a fear I'd never felt in forever.

The fear of loss. Grief.

I couldn't believe it, the world was taking from me what happiness I had gotten back, and to make it all worse...

She'd probably thought I hated her.

POP. POP. POP.

"Was that a gunshot?! We're going in. NOW"!

It was at that moment, my sorrow melded into anger and determination. Hotch and Rossi, I could see a moment of doubt on their faces, but there was none in mine. I nodded at them, jaw set.

I could see relief wash over Aaron, I could hear Jennifer exhale.

I got geared up, muttering a quiet.

"We're going to get Elle".

⌫

12 hours ago.

I could feel her icy glare on me, but I couldn't look her way. I wouldn't. I was too prideful. Too stubborn. Too...hurt.

It all seems so stupid now in hindsight but then, then it felt so serious. End of the world serious.

She was still worried of exposing our relationship and what that would mean, fearful. I could see it in her eyes that she didn't wanna risk the chance of losing what we had, but I was tired. Too tired to look at it from a different perspective, to be rational. I wanted the world to know.

It'd been an almost full year of Elle and Y/n. Didn't that mean something to her?

Now that I think about it; It probably meant everything to her, and that's where her hesitance stemmed from. Maybe if I hadn't been so boneheaded...

↳

Elle walked into your office that day, two cups of coffee in hand and a to-go bag under her chin. It was early before most of the team had even arrived. She wanted to get there before it was time for another award-winning performance of pretending to hate the woman she loved the most.

The smile that greeted you was one of pure happiness, and it had only been met with a grimace of discomfort, and a problem waiting to be made. I mean, how dare she? Bring you coffee and scones while you prepped to present another harrowing case to the team with Garcia? How absolutely dare she?

When she saw the grimace on your face after sitting the coffee and scones down, her smile faded almost immediately. Knowing instantly what this would be about, the same conversation had been going on for a week and a half now that your one-year anniversary was quickly approaching.

"It's a little early, no? You usually don't come in so soon".

That was a lie, you both knew it but Elle also knew that was only the gateway to your next question. She sits before you, pulling up a chair.

"Y/n, pleas—"

"I don't wanna do it anymore, Elle. Can't we tell Strauss and them? Our anniversary is two weeks away, we've been going behind their backs for too long...I want them to know".

Elle sighs, you'd asked this so many times and the answer stayed the same. Her lips part to speak but it's stuck in her throat, it's dying there and in her silence you find disappointments. Your mouth fixes into a slight scowl.

"Well"?

Elle finally speaks, "You know why we can’t".

Her answer again left you dissatisfied, but this time instead of fighting it, you allow words you regret to slip through the cloud of emotions you were feeling. Before you know it, it's too late to take them back, Elle's face had already fallen, and your ego was too big to take it all back.

"Fine. Well, maybe we shouldn't even be doing this. I'm tired of being just two coworkers hooking up".

The words hang in the air, toxic and venomous. The fumes left a nasty stench. Elle notices you pull your bottom lip between your teeth as you often do when uncomfortable or nervous. Yet you speak not a word.

She stands, clearing her throat.

"Just two coworkers hooking up? That's what you think of our relationship? Wow".

And that, that was all she said. There was so much and nothing left to say, neither of you quite processed what had happened before she left your office on that sullen note.

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

The case had gone from a simple familial kidnapping to not only the dad holding his daughter hostage but an entire library. My Elle had gone inside that place, her bravery had always inspired me, but today I couldn't help but have a strong disdain for it. The way she was immediately ready to go. It was her nature. It was MY nature. The entirety of the BAU would've done the same, and all I could think was why it had to be here.

When we got in, it was already too late. James had shot Elle in the thigh, and his daughter in the arm, before he'd turned the gun on himself.

I'd rushed to her side, the first one there whilst the rest tended to the others. She was already grey, lips pale and blue and eyes barely opened.

From that moment, leaving her side wasn't an option, the only time I did so was when she was rolled away for surgery. The hours spent with her gone was just me sobbing uncontrollably in Penelope's arms.

I was no longer able to pretend, and I was hoping, praying to whatever God I could that she'd make it out of that surgery alive to be mad at me about that.

I could hear her voice telling me to pull myself together, I was being too obvious. I could see her soft smile vividly in my mind winking at me right after that.

It was touch and go, touch and go.

Finally, the doctor came to talk to us.

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

I put the finishing touches on it, my heartbeat so loud I could hear it pumping. God, I was so nervous. I'd never done something like this before, I never thought I could be doing something like this before.

I'd rejected the idea of commitment, shunned it. The thought of long-term relationships terrified me. Maybe, maybe that was why it was so difficult to convince me.

I'd convinced myself it was because I wasn't ready for the big boy's club to have the spotlight on my relationship, it was bad enough their eyes were watching my every move at work, but my personal life?

And yeah, that was the reason for about 6 months, but I knew in my soul of souls that I wanted her. Solely her. I didn't care about bureaucracy that much, hell, I was the reason there were eyes on me after the shooting they'd watched me like a hawk.

But no, that wasn't the reason. It was my safety net. My excuse to mull over my own grievances with love and relationships. I could see the sadness wash over her face every time I'd say 'not now', and it broke me each time.

I just...wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to admit to myself that I was worthy and deserving of love. That a relationship could be healthy/

I was constantly watching my back, waiting for it all to fall so I could prove myself right. When it didn't...When I almost lost her to my own foolishness, it was the biggest wake-up call of my life. — Waking up in that hospital bed, I remember it vividly. Looking to my right to see a sea of ginger curls strewn about my bed, her soft snores filled my ears. She sat in the uncomfortable hospital chair with her head lying on my bed, and it was clear she hadn't gotten any sleep in days.

Later, I was told I'd been in a coma for three weeks.

In those three weeks, she'd never left my side until she had to shower, eat, or change. Morgan told me he'd arrive only to see her doing work beside me and Hotch was more than gracious enough to allow her to be with me.

⌫

Her eyes opened, pained by the awful fluorescent lighting overhead, and as her eyes adjusted to the harsh lighting, she heard a familiar sound, those soft snores like music to her ears when she looked to her right and her suspicions were correct. You rest your head on your arms laid on the edge of her bed just next to her arm without the IV in it. You looked so peaceful, but she noticed how pale your usually cocoa skin looked.

She can't help but wonder how long you'd been there.

When she turns her head away from you, still scanning her surroundings, a soft British accent sounds out beside her rasp and sleep coating your vocals.

"Elle". You spoke so breathlessly as if you'd received the biggest surprise of your life. She took note of the way your eyes immediately welled up, apologies stumbling from your lips, "Baby, I'm so sorry I didn't mean—”

She'd shushed you, scooting over and patting a spot next to her. When you join her on the hospital bed that barely fits one let alone two, she kisses the top of your head, hand scratching and massaging through your soft ginger afro, she sighs and shakes her head, looking down at you.

"I know you didn't. Just sleep with me for right now, yeah"?

A tear slips from your eyes, you nuzzle gently into her side further, careful to not worsen any of her injuries.

"Yeah".

↳

I'd probably asked her to repeat what had almost happened to me a thousand times, something about hearing it was healing almost.

Though, she could make anything sound interesting with her voice like honeycomb. It was the one of the first things about her that’d caught my attention.

She knew how to make it real for me.

⌫

Elle lay in your arms, her head resting in your lap with your nails massaging her scalp. This wasn't the first time she'd asked you to retell the story, it was the fourth in a single week. You were happy to oblige, even if it hurt you to talk about seeing her almost die, You knew she needed this, and if it helped her in any way, you were glad to.

"The bullet hit a major artery. The doctor had come out to tell us of your death, I think my knees nearly buckled when I heard her starting to apologize".

She'd looked up at you, eyes and ears focusing solely on you like she hadn't heard the story a previous three times, she'd kissed the back of your hand gently when you had to stop for a moment to recollect yourself talking about how you'd thought you'd lost the love of your life.

Finally, you spoke again, eyes glossy.

"When she was about to call it, tell us her condolences, another of the surgical team ran out to tell her that there was a pulse, you could be saved. As soon as I heard the news, I did drop to my knees. I did. I thanked the stars that I'd get another chance to make it right, to tell you how much I loved you and regretted my words".

"You're doing so good, Beautiful", she'd whispered to you appreciatively, knowing how hard this was for you, It only made her love you that much more seeing the lengths you would go to to help her heal.

"It was touch and go for a few hours after that, you once again died on the table, three times. Finally, the doctor was about to give up until you got a steady pulse. They told us you fought like hell to get back to the team. But I couldn't help but think maybe..."

"It was. It was you, I don't remember much. I was talking to my father on the jet. Telling him all about the team, all about you. How I couldn't leave you just yet...Not on such a standstill".

Your breath caught in your throat at her words, you'd had your fair share of near-death experiences when working in SVU but you weren't sure you'd felt anything but coldness, a darkness. Elle had something to live for. She'd chosen to live for you.

"Y/n".

Your eyes shot to hers, she'd never really addressed you by your first name, only pet names she'd gifted you. So, when she'd said it, she'd gotten your full attention.

"Yea"?

"You were right...You were right, look, for a while" She sat up, moving to face you before continuing, "For a while it was about work, me wanting to continue lying. But, you were right. It wasn't just that".

Elle grabbed your hands in hers, her hazel eyes a vision of fall as she stared into yours, you knew the woman better than anyone, you could see this was hard for her; being vulnerable.

"I never thought of love as something that could be achieved in our field, not long term at least, and after about three failed relationships in, I stopped pursuing. I became terrified of commitment, and when you came along..."

"You got scared of the things you felt". You finished for her, sighing softly and pressing your forehead against hers, "Me too".

She nodded, "When I left your office thinking we were over, I realized my own cowardice. I knew I couldn't just lose you like that. I was gonna speak up and apologize. Talk it out. Anything. Until"

"Everything..." You whisper and cup her cheek in your hand, searching her eyes for that love, and when you see it. That same glint from first meeting, the side of your lips quirked up into a delicate smile, "I love you, Agent Greenaway".

"And I love you far more, Agent Y/ln".

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

I glance at the door anxiously, eyes shifting from that to the clock ticking slowly on the wall, and back. Putting this in the hands of someone other than my own was nerve-wracking, especially dealing with something this important.

Eventually, the door opens, and I'm almost allowed to breathe, but not yet. Not just yet. You're almost there Elle.

Entrusting this with Penelope Garcia of all people was the scariest part of all this, but she came through without spilling all, I admit. She smiles at me, giving a thumbs up. And I appreciate it, I do, but it's not any more comforting. Right now nothing could comfort me.

And then, I look to her.

(check image descs)

A vision of perfection stood before me, and as Garcia finally removed her blindfold, I could feel my face get hot, my heart pumping faster. She was stunning. We stare at each other in awe, I can feel my father whispering in my ear that I was making a good decision.

For so long I'd rejected the idea, and now it was something I was more sure of than anything else in my life.

"Come here, Mi Amor" I hear myself whisper, my voice caught in my throat as I prepared myself for the task ahead. She walks over to me with her hand still cupping her mouth in shock as she grasps what the box in my hand means.

When she's close enough, I get on one knee. The tears welling in my eyes a perfect match for the ones in her.

"You two argue like an old married couple". "They're still at it? Ugh, get a room".

(check image descs)

My voice shakes, I'd never proposed to anyone, let alone after only a year of dating.

"Y/n Y/ln, happy one-year anniversary. Where do I even start this? I know this is probably soon, but...If there's anything in this world I've ever been sure of, It'd be you. My hesitance with commitment almost lost me the most wonderful woman ever crafted. I'm tired of running. I'm tired of hiding...I want you. Forever. Will you do me the honor and marry m-"

Before I could get another word in, I felt her launch herself into my arms, her hold on me confirmed everything I already knew.

I couldn't let anyone else have her. She was too valuable to me. To this world.

"YES! Yes, I'd be so honoured to be your Mrs. Elle Greenaway"!

𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪𓆰♥︎𓆪𓆰♡︎𓆪

A/N: A bit of a trauma dump ahead, but I'm back after going through the death of my uncle only a week ago, having horrible PTSD and sickle cell kicking my ass. I hope this is to your liking, lovely! Sorry for the long wait ):

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