#im just continually confused
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#clover.txt#im just continually confused#Surprisingly#im not working on anything at the moment#been really busy
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man it's him the man
#fkn hate this guy (giggles n kicks my feet whenever he appears) god i cant stand him#but actually he can go fuck off#just roll with it#jrwi riptide#niklaus hendrix#my art#im in too deep in this hyperfixation its like so bad i had dreams from separate nights abt it that were connected#it was like a continuation it was so weird fnc kissed for a second time is all that happened really#ok cus first one was that happening in an ep n then i woke up confused n then next night i had a dream i was sitting watching an ep n the e#ents from that previous dream just played out n i was like “what the fuck it was real”#but it wasnt real at all it was just my subconscious pranking me#anywayfs d oyou like the sparkles in the full moon for forf orofor the trio :) i cant rn im so destroyed uhm uhuh uhhhhgng
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can you imagine if they left the epilogue as it was without adding hs2. like if they leaned more into the “fanfic parody” aspect of it.
imagine if you read the homestuck epilogues and instead of being forced to contend with fascist jane for the next five years, the epilogues just ended with dirk saying “Oh and this was all a dream. Btw.”
like i think that would have been insanely funny. there would have been so so many memes about the officially licensed homestuck parody where rose and jade cheat on their marriages and dirk makes davekat kiss. i think everyone would have found that to be such a riot
it would have been way more fun to analyze too because instead of being forced to take 40yrold divorced dave seriously everyone could be like “what does it mean when on page 42 dirk described him as a white lanky bitch… what level of irony is this… what does it symbolize”
instead it feels like we got told a joke that we weren’t exactly in on, felt hurt about it, and now we’ve all been sitting around for half a decade waiting for a punchline that might never come
#like now we’re forced to analyze fascist jane and accessory jake and like take their feelings seriously… hussie wasnt it a joke say sike#this is not like a diss against the authors of hs2 at all by the way (not original nor current) im just confused why hs2 even got made#it didnt feel like they needed to go on and make it a whole story really it felt like the epilogues were bizarre enough…#they should have ended it with ‘it was all a dream’ fr#like i think that would have been so funny. and the fandom would have had a lot of fun with it even if some ppl didn’t find it funny#idk. it could have been more obviously a parody is all im saying#since the a lot of it certainly feels like that#and they also didn’t have to try to take the world seriously in the continuation (hs2)#but you know. im just a guy idk 😭#my boyfriend said some of this and it just made me think#homestuck#hs2#op#hsmeta#i literally have no idea what im talking about so please ignore me
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Pinup!!!!! the baby!!!! the guy!!!!
sorry if this looks kinda iffy the majority of this was drawn between 11pm and 2:30am so i was very tired loll
also yes that is a totoro bag i dont care if totoro doesnt exist in cyber city he has a totoro bag come at me
Pinup belongs to @turntableart
#read all the tags before you reblog otherwise you will be confused#i feel like i got the body type wrong uaughhh#i feel like the proportions are inaccurate#im blaming it on the clothes i promise the sketch looked good then the clothes went and ruined it#i feel really bad admitting this but now that i think about it i literally never draw chubby characters#all my addisons are pretty long and gangly for the most part and then spamton is just very small in my style hes not really pudgy#and tbh i didnt really draw full bodies very often before addisons and spamton but my one (1) oc was also pretty long and lanky#probably because i myself am pretty long and lanky#ueuugough hauguh#i need to practice more#also i feel like the shoes look weird#im generally not too happy with it but its ok ig#i was terrified of making the features too exaggerated and being offensive and i think i went to much the other way and just made him skinn#ffs#ill draw him again i promise#and it will look better pinky promise#🤙🤙🤙 theres no proper pinky emoji#i love him tho hes cute#i really like his original design#uururuguggg#ugh debating whether i should even post this or if i should keep tinkering with it#im gonna tinker with it a bit more i will continue writing tags when im done#ok tinkering over im much happier with it now#i made him a bit shorter and that solved all my problems#i think i have a habit of drawing characters too tall ngl lmao#also not too happy with the rendering but its good enough#uh im only posting the tinkered version that im happy with so if you want the untinkered version then just ask lol#pixel art#art#turn off the lights arg
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as fun as it is finally getting to play as a crow there is such a weird disconnect between everything we’ve ever seen and learned abt the crows and how they’re being presented as like. a fun found family in veilguard. it feels like the game keeps forgetting they are literally a brutal assassin organization that buys slaves, tortures their recruits and murders people (including each other! regularly!) for a living
#honestly not a huge fan of how restrictive the rook character is in general#but im still having fun just confused lol#like why is my rook so insecure it doesnt feel right with the crow origin#idk we’ll see if the crows improve as the game continues but im feeling a real. Lack of Depth in this game#please. im really hoping for more from them and lucanis#datv spoilers#da posting
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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner
#vulnerable tag rambles ahead please be kind abt them i didnt intent to ramble this much but i dont wanna delete it eitehr#me to every single man i have ever dated after 6mo-1y: yeah hey this really isnt working out i dont really know why but i really hate mysel#and i dont want to blame you because i dont think you did anything inherently wrong here; i think this is something about me but i need#space to figure out why im feeling this way [every single one reacted by telling me No i wasnt allowed to leave btw]#i hold very complex feelings about these relationships esp bc of them ending in very violent/chaotic ways most of the time#but its interesting to look back at it all and realize ive left every man for the same reason (which is that ive hated myself Every Single#Time ive dated a man) and its funny bc i recognized the self hate pretty early on w/ cishet men but when it came to queer men it was#much more confusing (esp w/ nto knowing Any lesbians at that point in my life). im so happy im a lesbian tbh#i have a lot of issues w/ the racism fatphobia and transmisogyny present in lesbian groups#and also coming out as a lesbian really truly saved my life. before i met my wife i was quite literally in a 3yr abusive relationship that#definitely would have died in if i hadnt realzied i was a lesbian and ran from him#its also weird seeing liek the hard evidence of the things that happened to me btween 2016-2020 tbh#cause that was such a bad time of my life. i truly dont know how i survived it but im so glad i did#like the three major relationships in my life b4 meeting my wife was: guy who was in college when i was in HS who stalked me when i left;#guy who was a year younger than me who cheated on me the entire time while telling me he was being victimized (he wasnt; this was very mess#guy who saw the very messy toxic ldr i was in and helped me dump my ex then decided that meant we were in a relationship [insert 3 yrs here#and admittedly all 3 years with him werent the same level of abusive but it was definitely unhealthy from the start considering I Didnt Kno#we were together until he wanted to celebrate vday and got mad i didnt know our anniversary - and like this isnt including the other stuff#that happened between those Relatonships[tm] (cause ive never been monogamous; these were just the Major Relationships)#like i genuinely think if i hadnt come out i'd be dead rn given just how dangerous my relationships were/continued getting#i am also so tired now that ive seen all this cause like. fuck i can barely believe it and i not only lived it but have PTSD about it#i should write about my life sometime. i feel like it'd be cathartic to try and make a tangible timeline and stories from the years ang stu#anyway yeah. be nice about the tag rambles. dont message me with pity or curiosity or anything about this. i dont usually talk abt this stu#publicly bc i hate the ways ppl start tryign to baby me when they realize my life has been extremely fucked up until only a few years ago#n im still working on accepting kindness from others bc of [insert life traumas here] but its a long process so pls respect my need for jus#being heard rn w/o too much pressure< 3 (but ig if u do read this can u like it cause i feel a little crazy seeing all the evidence of the#stuff i experienced now also cause fuck ik logically it was but also i cant believe it was all real still yk)
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About Noé's latest neurodivergent adventures (chapter 61.5 and 62)
(things I found relatable)
1. PUTTING UR HAND UP BC U CANT FIGURE OUT WHEN TO SPEAK. EVERYONE THINKS UR WEIRD FOR IT BUT ITS POLITE AND LIFE IS FUCKING HARD
2. Struggling to follow conversation, and seeing clearer ways of communication that no one else can and getting frustrated that the neurotypicals are so obviously communicating poorly
3. Vanitas designated translator
4. Being quite blind to politics (when it comes to discrimination against himself as a vampire [and his PRIVILEGES as a vampire] and in this case against others like dhams) bc he works individual by individual instead of by social categories
5. Last of all it hurts to see the other characters calling him ignorant and an idiot all the time bc Ive been there. He's booksmart, he's intelligent, just not socially, but here is everyone writing him off as dumb just bc he's different.
Its not like he's ignorant on purpose. Of course it's important to know this shit he's learning now, and it can be done, but it's a lot harder when ur autistic and, as Vanitas said, when u grow up so isolated. Learning is a neverending process and Noé is very clearly learning and just bc he works differently like putting his hand up to speak or interpreting the world differently doesn't mean he's stupid
#istg im not getting mad at fictional characters it just hits hard for me lmao#i actually grew up in a small very conservative town where it was unsafe to be queer#and i had so much learning to do when i moved to the capital and im so much happier now#but it was especially hard to figure this shit out when ur gullible and confused#i always had a nagging feeling that my peers denying others human rights was wrong but whenever i tried to object i would be mocked#like the inkling was there there were just no alternatives around me to the bigotry#until i found a place where my sense of justice could flourish#socialising is still hard but the politics side has improved so much and will continue improving#srry for ranting just wanted to share my personal experiences where relevant#autism#adhd#noé archiviste#the case study of vanitas#vanitas no carte#vnc#autistic noé#autistic noé archiviste
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how do people blog without the tags? just straight up nothing. nada. you reblog 50 things in a row in silence and there's nothing going on in your head?
#im sorry im just very confused about it#might be just a bunch of bots#in that case 01010011 01101111 01110010 01110010 01111001 please continue#it speaks
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i keep having dreams about tumblr drama. fascinating mind
#one of my mutuals insistently telling me i have to block nini but not telling me why so i obviously go erm.... no.... and then the whole#thing explodes into dashboard carnage but still nobody will explain to me whats going on and i ask nini about it and it goes huh? i havent#seen any of that and i go huh. okay. and the dashboard continues to burn#its not even a nightmare really im just slightly confused
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My dumbass just found out that nu carnival and nu carnival- bliss are two separate things (sorta) and apart nu carnival bliss is disliked?
Aside from the obvious censorship how different are they? Was I supposed to be playing nu carnival this entire time? Like from the website.
Whatever I've put all my time into the censored app so it's like I'd switch over anyway even if it was the better option.
#nu carnival#nu carnival bliss#is it just censorship that makes them different?#this game continues to confuse and upset me#to think im doing this all for these fucking cute boys T_T
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got in an argument with my mom and it took like 5 seconds to realize it's not me she's beefing with but my dad (again)
#so sick of playing therapist for her...#eldest daughter curse i guess#it was so stupid too she said she wants my baby brother to play fifa so he grows up more outdoorsy than my brother and i#like fuck off#i did three sports at any given time growing up#i didnt cry and have panic attacks at swim team practice every week to be told im not outdoorsy enough because i played zelda and mario#instead of fucking FIFA#shes just mad at my dad for sitting at home and watching tv all day#instead of idfk taking brother to the park or for soccer and shit#again i dont see how thats my problem#all i said is i dont want her to buy fifa for the kid bc its not fun and EA's a scummy company#$70 for a game full of microtransactions that a 7 year old will play once and find too confusing to continue#just take him to the park its a 3 minute walk and its free#jesus christ
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So does anyone else think the way Ino and Sai got together is extremely suspicious? I mean, it was established early on that Sai did not find Ino attractive and other than those few episodes where she "saves him" they don't really interact at all. Now one could say that she really did move him in those episodes and he really did fall in love but that's boring and personally, I wholly believe Sai to be 100% gay so hear me out. We know the Yamanaka's excel in mind oriented jutsus. They can take over another's body, delve into memories and with training, even break another's mind. So it's not that big a jump to assume they could change memories or even, use they're abilities to access the hypothalamus part of the brain perhaps? Sai, as stated earlier, never showed interest in Ino previous to the day she delved into the deepest parts of his mind. Ino on the other hand DID show interest in Sai. She's also been shown to be a emotionally driven individual. What if while she was in Sai's head she did more than just break him free? What if she just switched who's hand was holding the leash? She could access the hypothalamus and change what emotions are stimulated in him whenever he thinks, sees, or hears about her. And why stop there? With most of the emotional manipulation blueprints left from whatever Danzo did with him, She could make him into her ideal man.
#There's more to it but im bad at writing#Like her being jealous of Sakura constantly talking about that “date” she went on and now Ino wants to show her up#And her constantly having to go back in and update it so he can never “wake up”#Inojin sometimes gets to see them fight when Sai does start to break free only to be confused when everything is fine later#Sai never remembers the fights because Ino makes him forget#Eventually sais mind is so dependent on Ino's influence it's more dangerous to remove it than let her continue#This is also my excuse as to why he's so much more tame in boruto than in the show or even in 'the last' movie#Anti Ino#I'm just getting started#Just wait until I start talking about that theory where Kabuto is Sais brother and also an uchiha#making Sai also an Uchiha and by extension Inojin too#That filler Episode where Hoki beats Inojin is so much more important in my shitty personalized lore because of that#you guys asked for this btw
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the part of me that loves historical accuracy and research vs. the part of me that knows what will and will not translate on stage
#i have this one play im working on rn#and theres stuff im putting in it that i KNOW is wrong#but when i tried to do the real historically accurate thing it just got confusing and wonky and detracts from the point of the scene#wish i could just have my characters stop the show and be like#THE PLAYWRIGHT KNOWS THIS IS A HISTORICAL INNACURACY BUT THATS NOT THE POINT OF THE SCENE RN#and then just continue
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I know several people who like LOVE seasons 5-7 (11th doctors run) and think the storylines and moffats writing are brilliant and I don't get it!!! what am I missing??? why does literally every single episode have the exact same stakes: Rory/Amy/the doctor is dead. forever. so dead. but wait!!! what if they aren't!!! why do so many of the explanations for why they're not actually dead feel so rushed like they were added at the last minute!! why does every single queer character act kind of weird and awkward about being queer!! why does the doctor casually say that women are inferior when no one's around!!! what the fuck!! hello!!!
#why is rory continuously proving himself as the Only Man To Ever Exist only for the characters/narrative to continuously imply hes lesser#amy tries to kiss the doctor?? at her wedding??????#when amy is stuck for 36 years why is she like i forgot how much rory loved me?? GIRL HE WAITED 1000 YEARS FOR YOU???? WHAT????#he is CONSTANTLY the butt of the joke despite being unequivocally without a doubt the best character from this era#what the fuck was up with river being their kid#THE 50TH ANNIVERSARY???? WHAT?? THAT SHIT WAS WEIRD RIGHT???#does anyone else find it annoying that moffat changed the opening theme and the tardis and the sonic and the doctor ALLLL at once#and then retconned the entire storyline the early seasons are based off of??#WHY IS THE DOCTOR SO GODDAMN ANNOYING?? LIKE SO MUCH MORE ANNOYING THAN THE OTHERS#and fucking sexist!!! so sexist!!!#anyone remember the characters who were like 'were the short fat and tall skinny gay men why do we need names' LIKE HUH???????#gay people still have names steven 😭#i feel like im going insane bc i have no one else to talk to abt it until my partner catches up#but you guys still think these seasons kinda suck right? like coming off of martha and DONNA and her AMAZING storyline#these just kinda pale in comparison right??????#the last centurion is probably the last really good plot of that era imo. none of the other plots come close to having an ending that cool#like rivers story couldve been amazing and then it was just uh. kinda weird. a bit confusing IDK#i dont want to be a dick when talking to people and like shit on smth they love but i genuinely have a hard time#finding kind things to say abt a lot of this era#also and this might just be me but i do not like amy and clara v much 😭 theyre so fuckin mean and not even funny#why were martha donna and rose sooooo well written and they all have rich backstories. we know their fuckin families!!#literally its never even fully explained what the fuck happened to amys parents 😩😩 they just move on. the only friend of theirs#ever shown is fucking river??? as a kid??#am i the only one who found all thay confusing
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Do we have permission to write fic of/for ur inabanne au?
hi! you are indeed, so long as you give credit where its due! i also ask you send me a link so i may read your work!
#with inabanne specifically i think i have plans on continuing; i just dont know if theyll stay comics or become an actual fic#so if u do end up publishing anything of this au plz clarify that its a personal interpretation to avoid confusion if i decide to write 4it!#not art#asks & requests#inabanne au#gryffin's aus#as much as i dont rlly update it bc i have other things im working on it is something id like to explore eventually lol#also- tag me here or on twitter; im unsure how mentioning ppl would ever work on ao3 but i am on there if thats more convinent!#i hope u have fun writing for inabanne!
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I love seeing all the different perspectives of the COD fandom when it comes to if we had an opportunity to be in a room with them for like a day or something
The X Readers being feral over our big bois and talking about the different things they'd let the guys do (girlie same /gn)
"If I had the guys alone in a room I'd make them food and take care of them for once"
"I'd ask them lots of questions"
I'd force them to sit through the very long and detailed Overwatch Lore PowerPoint presentation
We are not the same
#now im just picturing this lmao#theyre all in varying stages of confusion and interest#soap is probably the most invested especially right off the bat#gaz probably warms up over time (if not for the sake of the subject itself but my wonderful public speaking skills and nice ass)#ghost is lost and is too afraid to ask questions after i get too invested and start looking borderline feral#price is listening he definitely is but his ass is not retaining anything#like if i gave a five question quiz afterwards hes getting every answer wrong#im now thinking about this as i continue working on my presentation#yes this is a real thing im doing#tats gets front row tickets at the premiere 🙌#certified snootles moment
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