#im going home tomorrow so im just posting this now.... might have another go at it when i get back tho

[daredussy]

🧼: That was bonkers :) 💀: Fucking hell, Johnny. Shut up <3

I'd say he handled almost being thrown out the window of a Chicago skyscraper pretty well

[likeumeanit9497]

just like that | m.s. |

matt sturniolo x fem!reader

based on this request :))

summary: after dating for four months without having sex, y/n finally decides that she's ready to take matt for a ride

warnings: smut; established relationship; unprotected p in v; oral (fem receiving); riding; mentions of questionable consent (NOT with matt dw); dirty talk; 18+

notes: damn i completely forgot about this im so sorry:/ i've just been so busy over the past week or so it completely went under the radar. def not my best work (i wrote it all today), but i wanted to get it up because i'm going on a trip through europe for 6 (SIX???!!?!?!) weeks and will probably not be able to post much when im there. anyways i hope u all enjoy!!

p.s. working on one more fic that i would LOVE to post before i leave tomorrow, if not it might be a while before im able to write again :/ it's gonna be a good one for the matt girlies though so keep ur eyes peeled ;)

─ ⊹ ⊱ ☆ ⊰ ⊹ ─

“Do you want anything from the kitchen baby?” Matt’s soft voice in my ear pulled me from the lull I was in, curled up beside him on the couch watching a movie. My drooping eyes fluttered open and I couldn’t help but smile once I came face-to-face with my beautiful boyfriend. The late-August sun was setting, and it shone through the living room windows in just the way that made Matt’s gorgeous blue eyes almost transparent; a harsh contrast to his dark eyelashes and tidy beard. He was looking at me with such unclouded care, the way he always did, and it never failed to make my heart flutter.

Matt and I had met on social media about six months ago, and started dating just two months after that. Our earliest conversations online had consisted of occasionally discussing our shared interest in pretty embarrassing hobbies — playing Minecraft, journaling, and watching rom-coms to name a few — but those occasional conversations evolved into staying up all night messaging each other, multiple-hour long Facetime calls, and eventually meeting at a restaurant for our first date.

Although it hadn’t been long since we started dating, Matt’s soul was one that I felt like I’ve known all my life. Never before had I felt more at home around another person than I did once I met him, and his presence in my life gave it a new level of stability that didn’t exist before. I had dated a guy in high school for almost two years, but the quality in the time spent with Matt versus him was incomparable. I was sure that Matt was the person that I was meant to be with, and everyday he did something new to prove that to be true without even trying.

Another thing that I loved so much about Matt was that, even after months of dating, he hasn’t once pushed me to have sex with him. In one of our early conversations, I had told him that my ex had always made me feel bad when I would turn down sex with him. While him and I did have sex a few times during our relationship, I had since come to terms with the fact that I really was just doing it to make him happy. Once Matt got over his immediate anger for me, he had sat me down and told me that he could wait forever, but that he won’t have sex with me unless I tell him I’m ready.

That was months ago, and still, he has kept his promise. While we have done plenty of other things in bed, he has always made it a point to stop everything before it gets to the point of sex. At first, I felt riddled with guilt because I felt like I should want to have sex with my boyfriend —especially one so kindhearted as Matt — but over time that guilt has fizzled out from Matt’s reassuring words and actions. He never ever put me in situations that he knew had the potential to make me uncomfortable, and wouldn’t allow me to feel bad about it either.

Lately, though, I had been feeling slightly different. While before, I would squirm at the thought of anything more happening once Matt’s hand would slip out of my panties, now I feel a slight tightening in my stomach at the idea of more. And before, I would feel a certain level of nervousness as I felt the weight of his member in my hand, where now there is a flutter in my core at the thought of that same part of him filling me up.

Never before in my life had I felt any of these feelings, and I didn’t quite know what to do with them. I was afraid of the abundance of dirty thoughts that flooded my own head constantly, and I realized that I was ready for more, but only with Matt. I had been contemplating on telling him this for the past week, but as I watched him walk back over to me on the couch in nothing but baggy grey sweats — the black ink of his tattoos hypnotizing me — my body reacted in such a way that let me know that tonight was the night.

“Here, I know you didn’t say you wanted anything but I grabbed you a water anyways. I haven’t seen you drink any yet today and you-” I cut Matt’s rambling off by climbing on top of his lap as soon as he was back on the couch; wrapping my arms around his neck and planting a deep kiss to his pink lips. He responded with a soft hum against my lips before wrapping his own arms around the small of my back. I opened my mouth slightly before pressing it against his again and moving them in a slow but passionate rhythm. Matt quickly followed suit, slipping his tongue through my parted lips before using it to explore my mouth. I fluttered my eyes open for a brief moment and caught a glimpse of Matt’s most beautiful features up close — lidded eyes, flushed cheeks, straight eyebrows — and released a satisfied sigh against his mouth.

I ran my hands through his soft brown hair, tugging slightly at the ends and eliciting a soft gasp from him as I felt my body flood with arousal. His hands travelled up and down my back, his firm yet somehow delicate touch a comfort that eased my nerves. From my place on his lap, I could feel a growing hardness against my ass. This wasn’t uncommon, obviously, but in the past I usually pretended to ignore it pressing against me. This time however, I rolled my hips up and down, feeling it slide against my aching core. “Baby.” Matt’s voice was barely above a whisper against my lips, but the combination of shock and arousal was still evident in its tone as he grabbed firmly onto my forearms to hold me still.

I detached my mouth from his while still keeping our faces just centimetres apart. His breath was rapid, but so was mine as we stayed like that for a moment; wild eyed and equally uncertain. Finally, I repeated my action by grinding my hips against his clothed shaft; this time watching as his eyes rolled back slightly in pleasure. “Y/n, what are you doing?” He mumbled, clearly wavering between making sure I was okay and wanting desperately for more. I continued grinding my hips against him, my mouth dropping open as I felt his shaft reach my nerves. “I want you Matt.” I whispered, and I watched as his eyes widened in shock; pupils dilated. “What do you mean?” He asked hesitantly, brushing his knuckles softly against my arms.

“I mean, I’m ready. Ready to have sex again.” I blurted out, feeling my face immediately flush in equal parts nervousness and arousal as I waited for him to respond. His face was unreadable as he clearly tried to gauge whether or not I was serious. That was confirmed once he finally spoke. “A-are you sure? I don’t want you to think just because I’m hard we have to do anything, baby.” I felt his dick twitch in between my legs as he spoke, and it shot electricity down my spine. “I know Matt, but I really am sure.” I responded, running my hands up and down his bare chest and leaving a trail of goosebumps in my path.

He continued to stare at me, his eyes travelling wildly across my face; clearly still in a state of uncertainty. I, on the other hand, was growing more and more frustrated by the moment as the heat continued to grow between my legs. “Give me your hand.” I stated, and he obliged; placing his much larger hand in my own. I guided his hand down to the waistband of my sweatpants, inside of the material, and finally slid it against my dripping wet core. Intaking a sharp breath from the contact, I watched his face as it immediately darkened once he felt my arousal coat his fingertips.

“See? I told you I’m ready,” I leaned forward slightly, bringing my lips to his exposed collarbone and kissing it wetly. “So please Matt, can you fuck me?” The room stayed silent for a beat, the only sounds being our ragged breathing, and I felt fear begin to trickle down my spine; worried that Matt might reject me. Just as I was about to retract everything I had just said, Matt’s hand snaked to the back of my head, guiding it up from his chest before crashing his lips onto mine.

I deepened the kiss immediately, feeling a mutual level of desperation like a surge of electricity between our lips that had never been there before. Matt’s hands began traveling all across my writhing body — taking his time on the curves of my ass — before planting firmly on my hips where he helped them grind against his rock hard member. Breathy, almost silent moans fell from both of our lips as our bodies slid against each other, and the deep-rooted sensation was taunting.

Matt’s hands slithered from my hips up to the bottom of my t-shirt, where he toyed with the material for a moment before detaching his lips from mine. “Can I take this off?” He asked, glazed eyes staring longingly into my own. I nodded, and without a moment’s hesitation my vision was blocked for a brief second by Matt peeling the fabric over my head and tossing it to the side. Once my vision returned, my view was of Matt’s hungry eyes glued to my bare chest.

Matt had seen my tits countless times before throughout our relationship, but at this moment it was like he was seeing them for the very first time. Mouth slightly parted, his breathing was ragged as he brought both hands to my chest and cupped my tits delicately between them; pushing them together slightly and brushing a thumb along each nipple. I hissed at the feeling, and that seemed to pull him from his trance, as his eyes immediately shot up to mine. “This okay baby?” He asked, and I nodded my head wildly.

A smirk toyed at the corners of his mouth before he attached it to my left nipple. I released short moans as he sucked and nibbled it gently, still pressing my core against his throbbing shaft. I felt myself falling deeper and deeper into a trance that I had never experienced before, and it was like my body and mind had completely separated as I mindlessly tugged desperately at the waistband of his sweats. Catching on to my gesture, Matt shifted slightly below me before using one of his hands to haphazardly pull his sweats down slightly; allowing his cock to spring up in between my legs.

I gasped at the sight before me, only now realizing its true size with it between my legs and feeling just a tinge of excited fear trying to figure out just how it was going to fit inside of me. Shaking the thought from my mind, I collected a pool of saliva in my mouth before spitting it in my hand and bringing it down to his shaft.

Running my thumb along his slit, I felt his whole body shudder below me from the contact. I began pumping my hand up and down his length; spending extra time twisting my wrist around his sensitive tip, and watched as his mouth went slack on my tits. “Mmm, keep doing it just like that baby.” He muttered against my plump skin, and I continued to work his cock in my hand while simultaneously grinding my core against its base. Just knowing that I was making him feel good was making me feel good, and my eyes rolled to the back of my head in pleasure.

After a few short moments, I felt Matt’s hands snake to the waist band of my own sweats. My eyes found his again, and I watched as they searched my face. “You’re sure you want this, Y/n?” He asked, his voice gentle but laced with a huskiness that could only be explained as pure desire. I nodded desperately once again, feeling so pathetic but not capable of giving a shit. “I’m sure baby, please.” My voice had a slight whine to it, making my frantic need even more evident.

Planting a soft kiss to my lips, he grabbed firmly onto my sweats and began peeling them off of my body. I lifted my hips up slightly to assist him in this, and once I dropped them back down, I hissed from the feeling of my bare core against his cock. “Matty, I need you right now.” I practically cried out, leaning my body forward and planting nibbles and kisses along his exposed neck. The suspense was torturous, my body only just now recognizing how badly it was craving his.

His hands cupped my ass, and he used his grip to lift me just a couple inches off of him. I felt him spread me open slightly before dragging a finger once again against my aching folds. “Mmm, so wet for me baby.” I released a breathy moan at the combination of his touch and words, and squirmed in his grasp. “I’ll help you get it in, but I want you on top. That way you can take it as slow as you need to, okay?” His voice softened as he spoke, and his hands massaged me gently causing me to physically relax. “O-okay.” I muttered, so turned on that I was willing to do just about anything he wanted me to.

Just then, he placed a soft kiss to my lips before I felt the very tip of his cock brush against my opening; causing me to gasp. “Shh, it’s okay baby. I’ll go slow.” He whispered in my ear, and I pressed my forehead into the crook of his neck in anticipation. Finally, I felt my walls begin to expand as he pressed the first few inches into me. Moaning at the sensation, I felt my whole body flush in immediate lust. As if they had a mind of their own, my hips subconsciously began lowering onto his shaft; taking more and more of him as I sunk down.

A moan fell from his lips as my walls enveloped him inch by inch, and I slowly lifted my head from his neck and straightened my body up to allow more of him to fill me up. Even though he was big and I hadn’t had a dick in me in a long time, my slick arousal allowed him to bottom out without causing me to feel any pain; only indescribable pleasure. Once every inch of him was in me, I stayed still for a moment looking down at him. His desire was plastered across every inch of his face, and it made him look impossibly beautiful. There was no fear in me in that moment, only want, and so I began riding him.

As soon as I propelled my body up and down his shaft just once, I felt a pit of arousal begin to grow in my stomach. Groaning in pleasure, I continued with my moments; holding onto his shoulders to keep my trembling body stable. “Mmm you feel so good baby.” Matt moaned out, his eyes never leaving my pinched face. After a while, my body adjusted completely to his size and I was able to increase my speed. As I slid my walls up and down his shaft, Matt gripped onto my ass with all his might, using his hands to help me maintain my speed.

Moans fell from my lips as his cock ruthlessly hit my g-spot, and I felt my lower stomach build in pressure. “Fuck.” I muttered under my breath, feeling my skin go flush from the heat of the moment. The room filled with the echo of our wet skin slapping against each other, adding to the erotic air around us. Prolonged strings of moans fell aimlessly from my lips, and as I came closer and closer to my impending climax I began struggling to maintain my movements.

Matt seemed to pick up on this, as he adjusted his hips and began pounding into me from below; his hands holding me in place where I just clung onto him for dear life. “F-fuck Matty, like that. S-so good.” I cried out, my voice choppy from his rapid movements. My brain melted into a pool of liquid as all I could think about was reaching my high that was just out of reach. “You’re taking me so good baby.” Matt groaned out as he continued driving his length into me, staring deeply into my eyes with a fogged over expression.

“I-I think I’m gonna — oh god, think I’m g-gonna cum Matt.” My eyes rolled to the back of my head and I dug my nails into his shoulder blades, struggling to give into this new overwhelming sensation bubbling up inside of me. At this, a guttural moan fell from his lips and he somehow increased the speed of his thrusts even more. “Want you to cum around me baby, please.” There was a desperate whine to his voice as he spoke through his shortness of breath, and it was enough for me to reach my climax. Legs shaking, I released a plethora of moans and curses as my body was hit with multiple waves of indescribable pleasure. “Good girl, feels so good honey.” Matt’s voice was soft in my ear, and it helped to bring me back to earth as my hurricane of an orgasm left my body in shambles.

I continued to bounce on Matt’s dick slowly as I attempted to regain what little composure I had before my orgasm stole it from me, but I quickly learned that all of my energy had been stripped away. My body was trembling uncontrollably, and my head was filled with a fog that made it difficult for me to stay upright. Matt caught on to this, as he planted his hands firmly on my hips, keeping me still, before reaching forward and kissing me deeply. “You tired, baby?” He asked gently, rubbing circles on my sensitive skin. Sheepishly, I nodded, and Matt didn’t hesitate before guiding me off of his lap and helping me lay down on the couch.

As soon as my head hit the soft material, I felt my body immediately begin to relax again. I watched from my place on the couch as Matt began to slowly crawl over to me, before leaning above me. “You did so good baby,” He brought his lips to my chest and began dropping soft kisses against my skin, “Now,” His mouth travelled from my chest down to my stomach, “I want you to just lay here and relax,” He continued to move his lips down my stomach to my hips, “Let me make you feel good, okay?” His face was now hovering above my swollen heat, and I couldn’t help but nod frantically, feeling a sudden need to have his mouth on me.

Matt situated his body so that he could lay down with his face still just above my core. He brought both of his hands to my folds and I flinched as he used his thumbs to spread them apart slightly; exposing my bundle of nerves to the air. My vision partially skewed by his hair flopping in front of his eyes, I watched in awe as he brought his mouth closer and closer to where I needed it the most; before immediately gasping in pleasure once I felt his warm tongue make contact with my clit.

Immediately, Matt got to work in swirling his tongue in expert circles on my overstimulated nerves. This sensation in combination with his rough beard against my inner thighs was so intense it was almost painful in the best way possible, and I was incapable of controlling the throaty moans that fell from my lips as I watched him devour me entirely. Matt then used his mouth to suck on my nerves, bringing forward yet another new sensation that drove me crazy. It felt so unbelievably good, my hands flew to his hair where I held firmly; doing everything in my power to keep him in place. “Oh yeah baby, please, just like that.” I struggled to get the words out through my constant gasps of pleasure, but it was clear that they didn’t fall on deaf ears as Matt moaned in pleasured acknowledgement against my heat and kept his rhythm and pressure the exact same.

Feeling another orgasm begin to bear its teeth in my stomach, it was like my hips grew a mind of their own because as soon as Matt brought his hands under my ass to lift me slightly up on the couch; I began grinding my heat against his eager mouth. “Fuck.” He moaned against my clit as he continued to greedily suck and lick my nerves. I squeezed my eyes shut as a whine escaped my lips from an approaching orgasm, the pleasure that his mouth was giving me was too much. “S-stop baby.” I said suddenly, to which he immediately detached his mouth from me and I watched as his eyes scanned my fucked out face. “What’s wrong? You want to stop?” He seemed so concerned, clearly worried that he had somehow crossed a boundary, and it caused my chest to flutter. “N-no. It’s just, I was gonna cum again.” He raised a quizzical eyebrow, clearly confused by how that might be a problem. “I…I want to cum with you.” I finally said, and watched as his facial expression changed from one of concern back to one filled with lust.

He smiled quickly before dragging his body up my own, planting occasional kisses along my body on his way. Once he reached my head, he immediately began kissing me passionately, slipping his tongue through my parted lips and allowing me to taste myself on his mouth. Pulling away, I noticed my arousal laced throughout his beard, and that along with his pink swollen lips fresh off of my heat was enough to make my head spin. Just then, I felt him line his shaft up with my entrance, and immediately gasped out when he slid it in completely. Before moving at all, Matt took a moment to gaze down at my destroyed face before grabbing my legs and wrapping them around his waist. He then leaned forward and propped himself on his forearms on either side of my head; slipping a hand through my hair and grabbing onto it gently.

After noticing my body relax, he finally began thrusting into me. Starting off slow and deep, he gradually increased his speed until he was pounding his inches deep into me at a rapid pace. Already being close to cumming, I struggled to get a grip on my thoughts as the pleasure of the moment pulled me deeper and deeper into a world of euphoria. “You’re so tight sweetheart.” He muttered through his grunts, and I felt my eyes roll to the back of my head at his words. “F-feels so good Matty.” I managed to reply, tightening my legs around his waist as I tried everything I could to hold off my orgasm.

Matt’s hand snaked through my hair before he grabbed onto my cheek, brushing it gently with his thumb as he stared at me with a gaze so intense that it was almost intimidating. “I-I’m close Y/n.” He nearly whispered, and I felt his pace begin to slow slightly as he began to be overtaken by his own orgasm. My eyebrows knitted together as I felt my walls began to break. “M-me too.” I replied, wrapping my hands tightly around his biceps to keep me grounded. “Ah fuck, I’m cumming baby.” His erotic words were followed by a string of animalistic grunts as he drove his cock in and out of me — slow but hard — and it was like my body was waiting to hear those words as my second orgasm immediately ran through me like a freight train.

My breathy moans harmonized with his deep ones, and I felt my walls contract around his shaft; milking his dick as it painted them white. My legs were wrapped so tightly around his waist, he was barely able to move them as we both rode the waves of our intense pleasure. As my orgasm continued to tear through me, my back arched off of the couch and my body trembled. From above me, Matt watched me writhe in bliss as his movements completely stopped. As I finally began coming down from my high, I felt his hand brush through my hair affectionately, and watched as his face turned up in a smile before he placed a deep kiss to my lips.

He gently pulled his cock out of me, causing me to wince from the raw pain, before laying beside me on the couch and pulling me into him. Face to face, we stared lovingly at each other for a moment; my mind still spinning from how good he had made me feel, and in that moment I was worried that my heart might explode. His blissed expression told me that he was feeling the same, and his hand delicately rubbing the small of my back confirmed it. “Are you okay?” He finally asked, minor concern visible on his beautiful face. “I’m more than okay.” I answered honestly with a chuckle, causing him to laugh in relief as well. “I think I actually love sex.” I continued, causing him to really laugh this time before planting a kiss on my sweat-beaded forehead. “Well I think I actually love you.”

─ ⊹ ⊱ ☆ ⊰ ⊹ ─

[idontknowanyonesblog]

Mirage rise of the beasts x gn reader

Mirage is kinda obsessed with reader and a bit of a perv. Slightly nsfw (mirage watched reader get undressed and watches them shower through their window and jerks off) BYE THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING LMAO

This was like my second fanfic I’ve ever written and I was to shy to post it but because I don’t have much experience writing this might not be very good and I didn’t feel like reading this over

Ever since your friend Noah had introduced you to his friend Mirage (who happened to be a 15 foot tall alien robot from space) he developed quite a liking to you. Anytime you went to the shop Mirage was always trying to talk and flirt with you. But if you were being honest, you didn’t mind it. Little did you know, Mirage had a special little “talent” which included being able to clone himself and turning invisible. One day he heard you huffing and cursing as you made your way to the door to enter the shop and Mirage wanted to test something out. He turned invisible and sat in the corner, waiting for you to enter and when you did you were absolutely soaked due to the heavy rain outside. You noticed nobody was in the shop which was a bit strange but you were too uncomfortable in your soaking wet clothes to care so you began to take your clothes off before grabbing some fresh clothes from your bag. For the few moments you were bare and stripped of your clothes, Mirage was secretly watching you with wide eyes clearly enjoying every second of it. You huffed as you put your wet clothes in your bag and went off somewhere else in the shop to get some work done and wait for the rain to pass by. After around a hour later the rain was only a small drizzle so you decided to pack up and go to back home. You walked around 10 minutes until you made it to the parking garage where you had parked before the rain came in. If you had known before hand about the rain you would’ve parked a bit closer to the shop but it didn’t matter now. It was late so Mirage knew you were heading home but he needed to see more of you. He had to or else he thought he might go feral. You’d asked him for a ride home a few times when your car was getting serviced so he knew where you lived thankfully for him.

He knew it was wrong to follow you home but he just had to. He followed you home, poor you, not knowing Mirage could become invisible and had used that to watch you undress and now he’s using it again to follow you home. Mirage felt bad about it, it was wrong but he couldn’t help himself. You were just too perfect for him to keep his sanity. Once you got to your house you went upstairs to take a nice hot shower, after such a long tiring day you deserved it. And Mirage deserved the view you gave him from the bathroom window. Your soft beautiful skin under the hot water mixed with the steam in the bathroom was such a mesmerizing site for the mech. And you wouldn’t expect a thing. Mirage was a nice mech, so funny and caring. He would never do something bad like this right? As you scrubbed your body and washed yourself, Mirage watched the whole thing happen. His spike beginning to throb with need. The panel slid and his spike was freed. His servo tightly wrapping around it and moving rapidly as he watched you. Small groans and whimpers left his mouth the closer he got to overloading. You turned towards the window for a moment and that’s when he overloaded transfluid all over his servo. The site of your body on full display from the angle you stood at. You were like a God/Goddess to him. Breathy whines left his mouth as he watched you step out of the shower and cover yourself with a towel. He wished he could’ve seen more but he had to go back to the shop before Noah got suspicious. He transformed back into his alt mode and drove away, hoping you’d come by the shop again tomorrow and hopefully give him another show.

THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING IM SO SORRY😭

[sarcasticfina]

For the prompts post if you are taking, 13 for buddie 💖

Im so glad to see you on my dash btw

i'm trying to get inspired to write fic so please send me some prompts from either of these sentence prompt lists: one, two (see original post for ship options)

13. Do you ever think we should just stop this? (credit)

It was late, and dark enough that Buck couldn't see much more than the outline of Eddie beside him. He should be sleeping. They had work tomorrow, and Chris had to be dropped off early for that science club he joined. Did Eddie pack his lunch already? They were a little distracted earlier...

In his defense, he hadn't seen Eddie outside of work for like... four whole days. That was a lot for them. Maybe he should double check the fridge. Chris had been snacking more lately. Another growth spurt. He could use an extra pack of carrot sticks or something anyway. Or maybe some of that trail mix he loved, even if he did add mini marshmallows to it, which wasn't exactly the healthiest snack...

"Stop thinking," Eddie grumbled. "Go t' sleep."

"Hey, did you pack Chris' lunch?"

Sighing, Eddie raised his head, hair in disarray, and squinted at him. "Huh? Yeah, I... Before. After dinner, I threw something together. Why? Is that what you're worrying about?"

"I'm not worried. I was just... wondering." Buck shifted around on the bed awkwardly and shrugged. "Did you add extra snacks? He's been eating more lately..."

"Uh-huh." Eddie dropped his head back down to the pillow. "Threw in some carrots and dip and some of that trail mix. Was like half marshmallows; you gotta stop letting him talk you into that."

"It was not half..." Buck rolled his eyes. "Anyway, it's balanced out with all the nuts and raisins and dried apricot."

"Mmm."

Buck drummed his fingers atop his stomach, blanket pulled up to his chest. "Should I go out to the couch? He might have questions if he wakes up before us."

Silence answered him. But not an 'Eddie fell asleep' silence, no. This was tense, 'how do I respond to that?' silence. The worst kind of silence.

"Eds?"

"I heard you. Just... Uh... Do you wanna sleep on the couch?"

Buck frowned at the ceiling. "Not exactly comfortable for my back."

"Okay. Then stay here. I can set an earlier alarm if you want..."

Buck hummed. "I should've planned better. I wasn't even gonna come over. I was going home but then I just... didn't." He glanced in Eddie's direction. "You know, we never really talked about what the like... boundaries are."

"...boundaries," Eddie repeated. "About sleeping over or...?"

"All of it. I mean." Buck shrugged. "We just kind of... started this... thing... and we didn't really talk about it."

"Thing..."

"Historically, I'm the impulsive one, but you're not, so maybe I was expecting you to take the reins on how to handle this. Not that I was planning for us to become this. And it's not all on you, obviously."

"This thing?" Eddie sounded a little amused now and Buck frowned.

"I just don't want to overstep. Or make assumptions. Or... I don't know. I don't want to risk this... us... i don't want to do anything that might hurt Chris."

Eddie didn't respond immediately, and that heavy silence filled the room again. "What are you saying... exactly?"

"I guess..." Buck sat up and shuffled backwards. "I mean, do you ever think we should just stop this? Just go back to how it was before? Before we tried to be... more."

Eddie let out a quiet sigh and then he was shifting to sit up too, his back resting against the headboard. He rubbed a hand over his face. "Okay. First, Chris is fine. He will be fine."

"But how do you know?"

"Because he's Chris. Because he loves us and we love him. Because no matter what happens, I know you will always be a part of his life. Even if, somehow, this thing blows up in our faces, you will always put Chris first."

Buck swallowed a lump. "Yeah."

"And second, yes, we should've talked. Especially if you've been worrying about what we are. Maybe I had more time to figure out how I felt and come to grips with what it meant, I don't know. But... Evan, you're it. You're... I mean, I hope you feel the same way I do. I guess I just thought we were on the same page with how we felt. And now we're together. Boyfriend feels a little high school, but, uh, we've always been partners. Now we're just another version of that."

Warmth bloomed in Buck's chest. Partners. Yeah, that sounded right. He turned to look at Eddie, whose features were still mostly shrouded in darkness. "You're it for me too."

Eddie's shoulders slumped. "Yeah?" His voice was softer, filled with relief.

Buck grinned. "You're stuck with me for life."

Reaching over, Eddie took his hand and folded their fingers together. "Good."

"Sorry I was freaking out."

"You get in your head sometimes; I should know better. In future, we'll work on talking it out instead of waiting until..." He glanced at the old man alarm clock on his bedside table. "Dios, 2 am. Tomorrow's gonna suck."

"Whoops." Buck shuffled down the bed and pulled him along, turning onto his side to rest his head on Eddie's shoulder. He hooked an arm around him, fingers folding around his ribs. "You can sleep in. I'll bring Chris to science club and double back for you."

Eddie mumbled something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like 'I love you so much,' and then pressed a kiss to Buck's birthmark. "Go to sleep, cariño."

Anxiety assuaged, Buck listened.

[wipethetape]

Ava finding out that you were this game streamer she secretly likes but won't tell pt. 2

Ava Coleman x Reader

A/N: much longer. basically oneshot disguised as headcanon because im bad bad (literally bad at writing)

1 - 2 (you're here!) - 3

When you get home, you start to regret what you just did. 

You're about to stream for less than 30 minutes because you posted that you would be finally back after being gone for a week because… Abbott being the public school that they are. 

You tried sucking everything up, gathered yourself, and grabbed some food before going live. 

While the live is ongoing, your comments are the usual questions of when are you doing a reveal, or when would be your next schedule because they always miss you. 

Remembering the interaction earlier at the break room, and also checking your calendar to see that there would be a game convention in less than two days, you responded spontaneously. 

"If I get two 150,000 star balloons then I might reconsider that." You giggled before focusing back on the game. 

Someone sent the gifts while you were trying to clutch win the game, so you didn't notice how the comments were raving about your reveal. 

After winning, you checked the comments to see that someone really sent what you said. 

You internally panicked, but since you did this to yourself, you guess you don't have any choice. You tried sounding as cheery as possible when you announced that you'll be live at the upcoming game convention so you hope everyone else will be there too before ending the stream. 

When you arrive at Abbott tomorrow morning, you see Jacob talking to Melissa about the game convention, but the poor guy is getting ignored because Melissa doesn't have her coffee yet. 

You didn't go to the break room during lunch because you were too scared to see Ava. Things were starting to hit. What if your fans get disappointed? How will you face everyone at work? How will you face Ava?

So you decided to just take a nap in your classroom.

When you woke up minutes later to get your kids after recess, everyone seems to be gathering together in front of Janine's classroom, with Ava approaching them. 

She announces that she got everyone tickets to the convention, and that made everyone cheer. 

She throws a wink at you, which didn't go unnoticed by your two mentors. You roll your eyes at her. 

She goes on your side, teasing on how your favorite gamer is about to reveal her identity, implying it was your doing so she got you a ticket as well. 

"Why you lookin' like that?" "Yeah, I look like Grinch who's about to ruin Christmas."

"Don't make fun of yourself. It makes it less fun for me when you do it. And who told you that? You look damn good under me in my bed." "And yeah like you will." 

Ava falters. "Right because my bed's too precious for some gagootz like you." 

You look at her like she grew another head, then gave a quick questioning glance to Mel and Barb who were looking aghast in your direction and heard Ava as well.

Few more bickering and the happenings became all blurry. You just know you retorted with some shit you don't remember

And now you find yourself in trouble on a deal of having a chance to date dinner with Ava.

[ohem1111]

just some ramble-y updates

some sims related and some not. non-sims stuff will be below cut off 😎

sims related:

so i DID find my most recent just dessert legacy save so that will start back up soon! i did have some things just about ready to post but decided to hold off in case the save was lost lol obviously i still had a back up from when she was a child so worst comes to worse i could have caught back up but i would have been missing the new sims i made and the new house (that i had already rebuilt once since my cat unplugged my pc mid build)

also i did end up starting to write my own challenge and i feel like i did so much yesterday. i might end up making a discord way off into the future if anyone is interested in giving feedback or anything once it is actually more solid and refined a bit. i think i might wait until the life and death pack comes out because im interested to see what could be included in a specific gen that i have in mind. i might ramble some more about it another day but im really excited about it.

not sims related:

the wild robot movie was so good and i cried like 3 different times, i don’t know why i am so emotionally attached to the story (i do know, im mentally ill LOL) but regardless i recommend it.

like a week or so ago i pulled a muscle in my back/shoulder but on friday i tried lifting again and made it wayyyy worse so ive been in so much pain lately, not fun. i am kinda feeling ok right now though as long as im not moving too much

right now as i am typing this im waiting for a video for work to finish exporting so that i can get on the sims but so far its already taken over 2 hours and it has approximately an hour an a half of export time left which i hope is a lie since i need to wake up early tomorrow. i literally just realized its not even 8pm yet but im already exhausted from waking up at 6 this morning and not going back to bed. i just want to play a little bit of sims today since i haven’t at all.

tomorrow morning my boyfriend is taking me to cvs to pick up meds and out to breakfast as long as i am up early enough to do all of that and get back home before my monday morning work meeting 🫠 there is this small local chain coffee shop where i live that has the best breakfast food. they updated their menu u over the summer and added cinnamon bun pancakes and they are incredible so i’m looking forward to it lol

also complimentary freya picture for reading all of that lol i hope you all are having a good day 💚

[ayayabaroque]

Tears, Laughter, Sorrow.

corny, pero wla ako mapost e wla akong no choice last march pa 'to sa drafts CW: Angst? mostly none, corny writing, i hate writing esp since i cant think of anything good/this is why i dont post anymore ffs Spoilers for Lantern Rite '23, not sure if i mention anything but yk its just to be safe A/N: i love school, but i went from rank 1 to rank 3 and i absolutely hate everything and everyone im going to cry sorry for not posting anything recently(and ever), and as usual, English isn't my first language, so please don't have any high hopes for this piece. I might go back to completing the Slowly series but im not feeling well since i last went on here to write a serious fic Read utc!

*:･ﾟ✧ Zhongli *:･ﾟ✧ "Would you live to see Liyue's downfall, or always relive the one most painful moment you have felt in your lifetime?" You pause, thinking on an answer to your friend's question. "The latter. Liyue's downfall won't happen for another thousand years, I doubt that any of you would be attending my funeral any time soon." Your friend tears up at the thought. "Right... yeah probably right." "I'm kidding of course! An endless time loop would keep me stressed, I'd rather have you by my side." ... "I'm... relieved? Hey listen, it's getting late, you should be getting home. I'll see you tomorrow." It was unlikely for your friend to suggest to leave this early, but you don't mind, as long as you see them again tomorrow. Then again, it was too tiring to walk home just right now, maybe you could walk around the harbor, after all, you and your friend have been playing by the docks all day, without anything better to do. "I should be getting home back to Zhongli." you mutter. Although cold, the air in Liyue would always smell of various floral scents, specifically the Glaze Lily. You hated Glaze Lilies. There wasn't one word in the dictionary that could describe how much you loathe these cyan-petal, night-blooming lilies as much as you possibly could. Well, truth be told, you hated the person Zhongli associates with these blooms, and it drives you insane. Guizhong, Zhongli's late friend before the Archon War, used to be so close to him. He would return late from his ventures with his friend in tow that he forgets to come home to you every single time. You couldn't really argue with the reasoning he has, since he is more of your superior rather than a lover. It's been so long since he spent time with you without reminiscing about Guizhong, probably a little over your 429th birthday. Oh yeah, did I forget to mention you were old? The more Zhongli leaves you to mourn Guizhong's day of death on your day of birth, you resort to laughter every time he comes home instead. The false joy of seeing him return home after a mournful day which he marks Guizhong's passing, your laughter behind the façade you show for your lover. "How's Guizhong been? Any response yet?" you muse. "I prefer you not adding salt to my wound." "Oh yeah, you guys ended on rather good terms, it would be a shame if I were to slander her in front of her good friend." The statement always seems to make Zhongli seethe with fury, and it looks like he's had enough of your insults and remarks. "A true shame you did not get to know her, or were you busy burning away your lifetime serving false gods?" "You know well better than to bring my past stature into this conversation." It pains you to think about your past, when your parents sold you off to a minor god for wealth, leaving you to rot in the god's hands. "I'm tired, I do not wish to make this into a heated argument. Go to bed." ... "I honestly wish it was you instead of Guizhong, I miss her dearly." That was what made this memory painful, it was what made you cry in the eve, and sob in the morn. In the end, when you were asked the same question years ago, immortality seemed like a dream, now turned into a living nightmare. You only wish to awake from this horrible dream, again, and again, and again. "So... Would you live to see Liyue's downfall, or always relive the one most painful moment you have felt in your lifetime?" The question that would mark another day of the loop, spent in misery and sorrow. The days you've spent celebrating your birth over, and over again. "Happy 7,329th birthday, to me."

[fantrollology]

do u wanan send asks? do u want ppl to send them to? okay well

i had a busy day yesterday and another busy day today and have another busy day tomorrow probably so idk if I’ll be able to get to asks (u can send them ill just take a min to get to them) but I would love it if people sent some asks to these guys, cuz i get super shy about sending baity asks and i think all of them are super interesting even if you dont ask them about my guys / the reasons i list here. and then i can read them when i get home or when i take breaks

@sasster Colmea & Myriad — stern mushroom scientist and his psychic daughter who can talk to said mushrooms (my boy Gus works w Colmea) or Mantle or Deimic or Retcon (fleet psionics and their dad handler) OR AELIUM who got stabbed and then died and then didn’t die and is having a crisis about it. or Demuye bc i like him (and knows Gus!)

@contrastparadoxx Contra!! bother her pls. Gus decided not to spore her cuz she’s friends w Demuye and she likes that guy. u can also ask her about her dad

@sunnetrolls Antare I like that guy. hes also quads w Contra & Demuye and works as body cleanup?? hello???

@roetrolls Nymira or Somnia or Veylin my wife Veylin. ask her things that make Roe use the sundress sprite please and thanks. I dont have anything w these guys they just have stuff going on and are my wife. oh yeah u can bother chase sasster about the dream sequence arc too vía Cylion who fuckinf hates me

@asks-n-trolls Mirage................. besties w Rilakk <:)

@quiescent-trolls Arunae!! Fledge and her live on a space station together after ditching the fleet and Fledge recently dropped some previously unknown lore (starts on second post) and... Arunae might not know as much about Fledge as she should! you can also talk to Beau (a beautiful beautiful man) about Aether, who is his apprentice. you should also bother him about his history with his cavern & what drew him to what he does now <:)

@lordtonic recently made a silly guy Dgen who works w Colmea, u can bother him. u can also bother Sid in general & id love that. he has a moirail now <3

@damistrolls has Hisset, who worked with Colmea in the past... Petasi and Spyke recently became moirails, Petasi is also helping Aelium while he is super depressed. u could also bother nihoko about Cee and echnir

@byrdstrolls bother FAERIAAAAA about all her business! shes developing some kind of weapon.. thing... see i know but yall dont so bother her PLEASE and also u can bother her maybe about Alaska. i also really love The Architects new sprites so u should ask her stuff... uhhh i love Diante and would love to see more w him...

uhh thats everyone i think of right now i might add more later or tomorrow but im gonna go lay down cuz im sleepy and have. a ton more work to do tomorrow.

[sortofanobsession]

Hospital food lacks Love (911-Missing Scenes from 6x11 In Another Life)

Author's note: one of two fics that I wanted to write after last night's episode. Bobby expresses love through food often. And hospital food is meh at best. So this is what I feel would have happened. Also posting on mobile so no reason more. Sorry about that.

And it's canon now that Bobby is Buck's dad. They didn't just hint, they said it.

Buck has two sets of parents and that is awesome.

SPOILERS!

Enjoy!

Everyone had gone home. He had even somehow convinced Maddie, Bobby and Eddie he'd be fine for a few hours. The staff had brought him a tray with dinner on it and told him to eat slowly because it was one of the first meal since he had been intubated. And he assured them he would. He tries to eat it. He really did. The main issue was that this is not what he wanted to eat. It was a painful reminder that he was stuck in the hospital, eating hospital food. The blandest and boring safe food that is hospital food. He ate a bit but ultimately it wasn't appetizing at all. So he pushed it away and grabbed his phone. He debated on who to text. Maddie would probably tell him the food he was supposed to eat was that way because he had a tube shoved down his throat. They probably didn't want to overwhelm his system. Eddie might say the same thing or he might offer to sneak him in a burger or something. But the one person he knew would always make sure he had enough to eat was Bobby. Bobby always made sure Buck was okay. Even his unconscious mind knew Bobby was there for him. Cared for him. He would always appreciate Bobby being there for him. He loves Bobby like he did his own dad. Maybe even more at times. Bobby was the father figure that had been there when he needed him. His unconscious mind even brought him back from the dead when he needed him. So he sent Bobby a text.

Buck: hospital food 🤢

Bobby: that bad tonight?

Buck: im just going to eat the jello

Bobby: you really should eat something, Buck

Buck: its so boring and terrible

Bobby: did you at least try?

Buck: yes dad

Buck meant for it to come off as a sarcastic joke. Bobby didn't need to know that it felt more accurate to him. And knowing that Athena was the only voice that really broke through to him during his dream made him feel cared for. Loved. It really did feel like he had two sets of parents. Phillip and Margaret Buckley, the ones that initially brought him into this world and we're trying to reconnect with him. He could appreciate that. And the ones that helped bring him back into the world this time, the ones that love him by choice, not because of obligation, Bobby and Athena.

Bobby couldn't help but smile as he read Buck's text. Any hesitation that he might have had to sneak Buck something to eat vanished. Buck had a grip on his heart and he had for a long time. Since Bobby helped him get ready for that awful date all those years ago. Buck sat nestled in his heart alongside the kids he lost and the kids he gained when he married Athena. May was right.

Bobby: you want me to sneak you in something don’t you

Buck: Id say I’d die for it but too soon

Buck: right?

Bobby: Right

Buck: Yes sir *saluting emoji*

Bobby: I’ll make & bring you breakfast tomorrow

Buck: this is why you are the best

"What are you smiling about?" Athena asks as she joins him. Bobby just hands her his phone.

"Of course," Athena grins. "He got you with that dad text didn't you?"

"Even May says it's true," Bobby says.

"Because it is. He may have his real parents in his life, and they seem to be trying, but he knows he will always have you. And that means something."

"It does," Bobby smiles. "I'm so glad he's okay. I will make him whatever he wants if it means he'll stay that way."

"I know you will. He knows it too."

The next morning Bobby makes breakfast for his family. Omelets. Fluffy omelets that are packed full of tiny pieces of whatever any of them wanted. And he packs up one that he knew Buck would like. He packs it as best he can to keep it warm. Packed along with some other stuff he was bringing to help keep Buck from going crazy during his recovery. Some of it May and Harry insisted he would need. He headed to the hospital.

He knocked on the door before entering Buck's hospital room. The smile on Buck's face made Bobby smile.

"Morning," Buck greeted him.

"Morning, Harry and May said to tell you to feel better soon. Like soon, soon," Bobby shakes his head. "They also sent stuff to keep you sane. So here." He sets the bag of stuff on the bed. "Also breakfast is in there so there's that."

"Yes!" Buck grins. And pulls the tray table closer so he can pull everything out. He eagerly opens the container and finds the utensils. "Thanks, Bobby." He hums when he takes a bite. "I feel like I haven't had anything with flavor in ages."

"It's been less than a week, Buck," Bobby chuckles.

"And it feels way longer," Buck complains.

"You're just bored," Bobby says.

"You aren't wrong," Buck notes.

"Well I don't have a shift until tomorrow, so finish your breakfast and we can find something to do."

"Thanks Bobby, you really are the best," Buck smiles.

"Anytime, kid. Anytime."

[uusercatt367]

Just spreading awareness! 7.10.23

Hey I know it’s off my vlogs topic but I just can’t take it anymore, Recently in my country where I live with my family, friends, classmates, teachers and so many other people are being *killed* , *kidnapped* and even * r@ped * and * tortured * by a terrørist organization, I really need to mention that kids, babies, older people and teenagers basically all people here are being m*rdered one by one. The terrørists are going from home to another one and k1lling everyone in there without mercy. It pains me that as a child yet myself I have to live in this reality of pure evil surrounding me and my loved ones. For now 200+ are k1lled and 1100+ are harmed really bad and like 300+ are currently in the hands of the terrørists, more then *3000* bombs, rockets and more are being launched on us , While I’m writing this I’m shacking so bad because I don’t know if I’ll get to wake up tomorrow or how’s my family and loved once are rn. I try to keep as much in touch with them but the internet kinda sucks.

I can’t describe how horrible our country state at, I hope people can realize that violence out of pure hatred for us isn’t the answer for the problem, while I’m writing this on the news more and more reports of young kids getting k1dnapped from their parents and it’s so heartbreaking hearing the voice of their mother just breaks in pain , I’m absolutely refusing calling all those terrørists HUMANS they don’t deserve those rights after taking humans rights from others and breaking families apart. Why can’t there just be peace?

I just needed to vent on my situation at my country while everyone is being silent on this.

I would appreciate all the support but saying to me “ stay strong ��� isn’t gonna help. Saying heart warming things isn’t going to help either but my point is to just spread awareness. Thank you ❤️ ( as I wrote it there is more rockets being launched at my home )

Im praying that everyone will be safe

And I might need a break from posting everyday sorry.

[bobasnonbeliever]

only posting this here because i dont think anyone will see it. i need to get this out

im so fucking tired of my life. im tired of caring, like, in general. as stupid as it sounds, i was watching kitchen nightmares, and gordon said something about a chef or an owner, i dont remember exactly, he said; "losing hope is a scary thing to do, when theres just no more light at the end of the tunnel, it takes you down dark paths." or something like that. and ive been suicidal/depressed since i was 9, but i thought to myself "im not hopeless, am i?". the more i thought about it, the worse i felt because, god no, im not hopeless. im helpless, or maybe i wallow too much in my own self pity. i dont know the difference. every goddamn day feels like another waking nightmare, im sick of living with my mom, im sick of her not letting me get a job. i dont want my name on the damn electric bill because shes over $1,000 in debt to the power company anymore. shes already ruining my credit, and i dont even have a damn job! not to mention her fucking kid, her 5yo fucking kid, im taking care of. the product of the man who beat me over and over again, threatened to kill me, and then he took a greyhound bus out of our lives. why didnt she protect me? he never once hit her, or anyone else, why didnt mom help me? i was only 13 when he first pulled me by my hair and slammed me into the stairs because i let moms ice cream tub melt on the kitchen table for half an hour. it took him till my brother was 3 to leave. she valued him over me, and even now. im always taking care of my brother, even when he screams at me, cusses at me, throws things at me, spits on me, hits me, kicks me, claws me, bites me, and more. you get the point. she never even tells him to stop, she doesnt have to scream, or hurt him, or anything. just please, please tell them to stop hurting me. i still take care of him. i take care of him when she takes 20 fucking benadryl and passes out for the full time shes at home between shifts. i sacrificed my education to "help her" take care of him. and she gets mad at me when i parent him, when i tell him off, or even more mad when i have to cry and beg him to stop hurting me. she says "youre 22 years old, get a grip" when im covered in bruises from the 5 year old "hes five!" she will scream when i tell her he hurts me. "he is five, hes supposed to listen to you" i said once, and she just stared at me. im always fucking things up, she never fails to let me know, when she looks at me like that i know its my fault. i cant even begin on my relationship, i shouldnt, he might see this. i just want to give up, im so tired of caring, i want to let it all go. my dog died, i ruined him too, i couldnt take him to the vet i couldnt help him. hes gone because i failed. my baby, im not saying that in the cringy melinial way, he saved me from suicide. so many times, it was "hell be so confused why im gone..", "hes gonna miss me", "whos gonna take care of him?" but now hes gone and im still here. my baby, is gone and im so selfishly still here. why wouldnt she let me get a job? i couldve taken him, i couldve at least got him put down so he didnt have to suffer in his favourite spot on my bed till his kidneys put him down for us. if i didnt know, my boyfriend would kill himself too when he comes home from classes tomorrow, and i was dead, i would take the entire 160 count bottle of benadryl i stole from moms room. i want to see my baby, he never ever missed on helping me, i owe him my life and couldnt even give him that when he passed. but not for lack of trying.

but even so, i dont feel hopeless. maybe only yearning, but it feels enough like hope. when i use my right hand to stroke my left cheek and neck, it almost feels like someone else. i get a glimmer of a thought, "one day, i wont have to beg to be taken care of. someone will do it because they want to.", but still, it hurts worse. i dont know how i can possibly derive so much gut wrenching pain from that little bit of hope, but i do. and still, i cant help myself, i cant blame anyone else. i can only hope someone will come save me. if i could handle this all on my own, i wouldnt be here typing this.

i want to decompose.

writing this after that monster of a textblock in the tags, but if you were wondering. im not exaggerating about the mess, and i wouldnt normally judge. because i have had worse bedrooms, mental illness is a bitch. but its in the common area, and she absolutely does make the 5yo live in it. she moved out to the living room after their room was too trashed for her to even walk in, so she toated her 50" fucking tv right out there and hasnt moved, accept to go to work, since. everyone pray or cross your fingers or send me some good energy to hope she gets sliced into a million pieces at work instead of accidentally oding on bennies so i can raise my brother with her life insurance money.

[guiltypleasureswriting]

I hope ur doing okay <3

Hey, I really appreciate you checking in! I thought I'd use this to idk announce my return or something.

It's been a few months since I posted anything (don't worry there will be something up later today or tomorrow)

tldr lost motivation, went home, got sick, faced my phobia, starting uni so im stressed

as always I'm going to rant under the cut and seriously thank you, Anon!

cw: throwing up

So I stopped posting originally for a couple days because I lost motivation to type up my things but I kept writing for about another month so I have a backlog of stuff to post. I just finished typing it up so I'll just be scheduling the posts now.

I went home to visit and I was planning to type everything up when I was there, but then the second night I got sick and spent the night vomiting which happens to be my biggest fear and the thing that's had me in therapy since I was 8. I got through it fine but after that I had a fever and was sick for almost a week. My mom was sick at the same time and ended up with a kidney infection so it was a looong trip. After that I kinda lost the plot so I didn't write anymore or type anything up.

When I got home, I just couldn't get the motivation and my therapist was on holiday so I didnt see her for about a month. After she got back though I managed to get my shit together and type everything up so I'm hoping to get back to posting again.

Right now I still have quite a bit of stress because I'm moving into dorms in a few weeks and with university starting I might also lose track of writing during the first few weeks of class.

If you read all of this, thanks for reading my rant i guess. Please go do something better with your time lol

Sorry for using your ask, anon. Despite everything I'm doing fine, thank you for asking

[sand-lily]

I JUST GOT MY CoE!!!

(like just now now)

they still didn't tell me when my training date is, where my hotel is, when i can check in to the hotel, or APPARENTLY how long I'll be staying

(my contract says 1 year, but the CoE says 3years,, so idk what to put on the application , if they dont answer by Friday I'll just put 3years, then i wont get in trouble if i do renew the contract but it wont be an issue if i only stay 1 year)

im NOT buying another hotel if i can help it, SO i do wanna know when i can check into the training hotel so i can buy my plane ticket for that day and put that as the arrival date on the application, according to maps and reddit the shinkansen is only a few hours to the city i need to be in from the airport, so im taking that instead of doing a layover in japan,,

so i need to know WHEN i can check in so i can do the math to know WHAT flight to take, and since im technically losing a day across time zones, thats going to be hard for me since normal time math is ALREADY hard for me

i already have the passport photos, i already have the envelopes, i already made the shipping labels (just gotta print them), i already signed the disclaimer (gotta print), I already filled out the application minus those 2 things im not sure about (and gotta print),,

so my plan is to go to the library and print all the stuff at once, and sign it at the library, then go from there to the post office to drop it off, and then from there back home (shit has to be planned when you don't have a car and public transit only comes once every 2hrs)

the CoE is valid for 3 months from tonight, so im HOPING they want me there the last week of june or mid july so i can pack up my apartment, call my bank, get an esim card for my phone company (this is the only phone number I had my WHOLE LIFE and I don't wanna lose it so i MIGHT pay for international data to keep it), take care of my pets, break my lease unfortunately, get a transit card (apparently you can buy them online BEFORE going to Japan and have it shipped to you),

and quit my new job i JUST started last week unfortunately,, ive only done training so i dont even think i can put it on my resume, HOWEVER, i did pass CPR + baby CPR so i can put that on my resume if they have the certificate on file (idk if they filed it yet)...but if i have another month, I'll be able to have childcare IN A SCHOOL experience (asst teaching)

ig i WONT be able to save up to pay off my credit card, or get my hair braided, and i WONT be able to afford business class like i wanted,, i just hope i get a window seat, i WILL NOT sit in the middle if i can avoid it, i also dont want an isle seat just in case i sit next to somebody who doesn't speak English and they feel nervous about asking me to move so they can use the toilet... i really dont wanna talk to ppl like that

i also also need to look for headphones with a type c connector, because i heard those exist,, my Bluetooth headphones dont work very well on airplanes and i MISS wired headphones severely (i WILL NOT take them out of the box until im at the airport tho, i WILL NOT risk losing them before the flight, as i tend to do)

i also also also need to go through my music library and delete the songs i always skip and add in the new ones ive been playing on repeat via YouTube, im NOT paying for plane wifi , i also x3 need to figure out how to download Libby books like PDFs since i cant use libby outside of America and i want to keep reading books on the flight

ig im un-makeovering my apt tomorrow, time to put doors back on hinges and remove contact paper and fill in nail holes and everything,, it took me like 3days to do everything up and i did it with a butter knife instead of a screwdriver, so it should take less time to undo it with my new electric screwdriver ,, i think my sister is going to try and steal my bedframe, shes already laid dibs on the couch

they BETTER NOT charge me ANY fees considering i paid a TRIPLE deposit to move in here without a cosigner and thats the whole point of a deposit

anyways i got a lot to do tomorrow, so i gotta go to bed at a REASONABLE HOUR, NOT 2AM

and if anybody wants to help me pay off my $1400 credit card bill (ive been using it to pay rent and buy groceries since nobody wants to hire me, unemployment is only enough to pay the minimum + my phone bill so i dont get late fees)

here are my PayPal and cashapp,, im not good at art AT ALL, but if yall want commissions for something so that i can earn the money (i can only do traditional art), I'll do that too,, or i can proofread something? creative writing is actually my forte believe it or not

anyways

cashapp: https://cash.app/$firellily

(the pfp is a pic of my cat)

[stillmadaboutpetra]

Pirate and Gumboot post flea bath (number two) theyll get another tomorrow once all my towels r washed and dry again. fleas just coming off them, trying crawl up my arms. rip. there's going to be an image under the cut of them before this round of bathing and Pirate has his dead eye and gumboot her fucked up eyes (it might be Haws i cant tell) visible but the image quality is poor but i know it can be uncomfortable to look at. all the vets r fucked and backlogged around here rn idk what the deal is, the emerg vet cant help me out either -- rip i dont work for a rescue agency anymore :// -- i reached out to some nonprofits for aid but yeah. theyre doing pretty okay! were like totally collapsed pathetic when they were picked up off the side of the road (NOT ferals. abandoned.) but theyve had lots of food and water in the last 48 hours and r pepping up. i dont think theyre from the same litter. Gumboot (the black and white one) is at least two weeks bigger than Pirate. im gonna admin dewormer today etc.

i will be tagging all future kitten foster stuff as Kit Me Up (what im calling my kitten nonprofit in my head. honestly might try to set up a business account for it at this point. ) theyre also both SO sweet its almost disgusting like. even getting bathed they were really good and didnt scratch and it makes my heart heavy. poor things. Gumboot did NOT like that i took pirate away from her.

theyre staying at the farm though cuz a) fleas b) i already have.4 cats in my onebedroom apt. on the 23rd crabcake and crawfish get a long ride to new jersey for their new home. ill show u them now:) theyre all done on the bottle and r on KMR weaning + tiny kibbles.

BUT AGAIN below the cut is the two new kittens looking rough.

[iam93percentstardust]

You can't tease me so far ahead of time with your Christmas fic and then expect me to wait months for it!!!!!!😭😭😭😭😭😭 im so excited!

:D!!!!! Thanks!! I love posting my annual Christmas fics. I've been very excited for this one ever since that post started going around last year about what happens to the ex-boyfriends in Hallmark movies (hint: this fic's going to answer that)

And just because I'm so excited for it, here's another snippet:

~

“Bucky’s pretty much my brother,” Steve admits readily. “We met way back in kindergarten. There were these bullies on the playground, and I tried to stop them, only I was a lot smaller than I am now, so they just pushed me down too. One of them was going to try to take away this blanket I used to carry with me everywhere, but then there was Bucky. We’ve been inseparable ever since. As you said, if I got home tomorrow and found out he was gone, it’d probably kill me.”

“He sounds like a great guy.”

“He really is. I’m glad he found Nat. They’re good for each other.”

“My Rhodey’s like that, for me. We were roommates at MIT.”

There must be something about the way he says it that makes Steve pause. “And who did you have before that?”

“Steve—”

“Who?”

“I guess I didn’t. Outside of a few bots I made, it was pretty much just me.”

“Tony…”

“Don’t pity me. I don’t regret any of it. I’ve seen the friends the guys at school ended up with, and I think waiting until I found Rhodey is the best thing that could’ve happened to me.” His eyes must be adjusting to the gloom because he thinks he sees Steve smile.

“I would never pity you,” Steve says fervently. “You might be the most incredible person I’ve ever met.”

Tony whispers, “Steve.”

“Tony, can I… may I, I mean, may I kiss you?”

[rosebury-archives]

CalmWriMo Log November 2nd - Wait, wasn’t I supposed to be calm?

first log, let’s go! I’m hoping to remember to do this more often throughout the month because i loooove talking and loooooove talking about my writing also. so let’s get through this!

writing day started out great with a very quick 315 word drabble i did in my ten min break at work. a little thing about Leia, which is fun, and i’ll probably post it some of these days, even though it’s just a very very quick couple of words.

i use StimuWrite most of the time and decided to get myself a new theme pack. which is fantastic, by the way, and i really do hope they release more themes soon. absolute sucker for that stuff. the type writer noises help me focus so much and they do have a nanowrimo sale going on so i might as well grab another one of the themes if i feel like it. i think that app is single-handedly carrying me through this month

finished chapter 13! i wrote 792 words of the total 4119 this chapter currently has. the formatting is definitely wonky as fuck and i really do need to figure out how to make it look a little nicer, but the words are all there, and that’s good!

finished chapter 14 as well? somehow? im telling you, it’s the fucking stimuwrite. anyways so for the first time in my life i finished an entire chapter in one evening. it is “only” 4501 words long, but that’s good, that’s fine. i don’t want to stress myself too much about irregular chapter lengths. i’m also really glad that i have a couple of chapters in my backlog again since i am posting as i’m writing.

so on day two, in total, i’ve written: 5608 words. this is one of the most productive writing days i’ve had in a while!

now my goals for tomorrow:

since i’ve done a LOT of writing today, i’ll let myself take it slower. first priority is to edit chapter 12 as soon as i get home from work so i can post it, and then i can decide what i’m more in the mood for? i would love to get into the flow and start with chapter 15, which is gonna be a very exciting one to write for me, but i also think it’s time to focus more on the self care aspect of this whole thing, and just do some chill video game farming while listening to an audio book.

i also wanna look through the calmwrimo tag and check out what other people are up to! ive already been lurking the whole day, it’s nice to have some insight into the writerblr community!

overall i’m already. really happy with my work. just the fact that i have a specific goal in mind is motivating me to sit down and write, and i do actually love pushing myself to write just a little more, and a little more, and just a tiny little bit more. this is gonna be fun! i’m having fun! this is good! eek!