#ihope i got his skin color right

[reipinto]

Very very long time no hermitcraft uh heres 3 dudes

[narrators-journal]

Hello! May I request bondage and nipple play for sengen?

Oh boy, I got creative with this one, but I am also sooooo rusty with Dr. Stone ever since it's not a hyperfixation atm. So, I hope this isn't too bad.

CW: Demon!Gen, kinks listed above, be warned

Warm. Something warm was pressing against Senku's mouth at 3 am. Well this is new. He thought, opening his crimson-colored eyes to see...someone he didn't recognize, kissing him.

Naturally, the scientist shoved the new person off of him. Sitting up to glare at him while snaking a hand beneath his pillow to retrieve the knife he kept there.

"What in the name of Albert fucking Einstein are you doing in here?!" He snarled, keeping his eyes locked on the man who sat at the foot of his bed now. Staring at him with shock-filled blue eyes.

"You...should be asleep. Why are you awake?!" The man asked indignantly, as if he were the one who'd been kissed at the crack of dawn without his knowledge.

"Why- Hold the hell on, I asked first. Tell me what the hell you're doing in my room without my knowledge before I cut your fucking face off."

The man- No. Now that Senku's eyes had adjusted to the dim moonlight pouring in from his window, he could see that whatever this creature was. It wasn't human.

"What are you?" He asked, watching the creature lash his tails,

"What the hell? You can't ask a new question without answering mine first!"

"I can when I'm the one with the knife. Tell me what you are." The scientist ordered, getting an eye roll from the two-tailed, dual-tone-haired demon before he crawled back up to the pajama-clad scientist

"Alright, this is getting us nowhere." He hummed. His white tail moving to wrap around Senku's waist while he straddled his legs without their hips being too close. "How about we strike up a deal? I assume you have an interest in science, right? So, you should be open to an experiment."

That offer made Senku's eyebrows rise. Breaking and entering be damned, his interest had been piqued.

"What are you suggesting as an experiment? And how will that answer any of my questions?" He asked, letting the creature drape his arms over his shoulders. The sheer, silky material of his robe doing little to separate their skin as he spoke,

"Easy! I will show you what I am and in return. You feed me.~" That made Senku hum,

"What exactly do you want? IHOP pancakes?"

"I'll show you. All you've gotta do is agree." The demon purred, his black tail reaching up to drag the sharp edge of its heart-shaped tip along his jaw.

But, before the scientist jumped at the opportunity to get any form of explanation, he took a moment to mull the situation over. On the one hand, this man broke into my home and assaulted me. On the other, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. A chance to experiment with a legitimate supernatural occurrence. Quite the pickle he found himself in.

In the end, though, Senku nodded.

"Fine. So what are you?" He asked. The demon snorting and gave him a quick peck before pushing the shirtless scientist back onto the bed.

"I am a succubus, darling. So, I feed on sexual energy." The creature explained. Unwrapping his tail from Senku's waist to pull his robe ribbon out of its belt loops. "Now, I'm going to tie your hands together. Not to be creepy, only to keep you under control." The succubus explained. Smiling when the scientist let him bind his hands to his headboard.

"Keep me under control? I am a very rational man," The demon snorted. Making sure Senku was tightly bound before he explained.

"I tend to drive my partners a little batty, so it's best to tie them down before they start screaming 'Gen!' 'Gen!'." He giggled at that, getting up to shed the thin robe he wore.

When he did, Senku took the chance to get a good look at the man. Taking in the two tails that matched the split-dye, choppy hairstyle, the matching horns, and the tight crop top with a heart-shaped window paired with booty shorts. There was no actual way to confuse Gen for anything else. After all, the revealing outfit Gen wore wasn't exactly pajamas.

"Now," The demon hummed as he pulled his top off, "are there any kinks or fetishes you like?" Senku shook his head, suppressing the heat he felt rising to his cheeks when the now-naked creature crawled back onto the bed to straddle his hips. "What a bummer. I guess I'll have to find your weak points on my own."

With that, the pretty man ran his hands down Senku's body. Leaving a trail of warmth that seemed to spread restless energy over the scientist's skin. Then, he skimmed his hands back up his stomach to his nipples. Taking the time to pinch the sensitive nubs to add bolts of lightning to the mix and pull out a gasp from the scientist.

Gen smiled at that, continuing to play with his chest to coax out more noises. Enjoying each squeak and groan the small shocks of lightning his actions caused drew out. Especially seeming to enjoy the gasp the scientist gave when he took one of his sensitive nipples into his mouth to swirl his tongue around it. Senku, though, couldn't fight the tint of red his face gained from the swirling whirlpool of restless need and desire.

Thankfully for him though, Gen seemed to take a bit of mercy on him. His tails snaking into Senku's pajama pants to push them down. Setting free the erection the succubus had been grinding against for so long.

"Where do you keep your lube, darling?" Gen hummed, the blunt question making Senku's cheeks once again turn a noticeable shade of red. God damn it, I need to FOCUS. How can I learn anything if I let myself get swept away? He scolded, though the logical voice in his head didn't keep him from pointing to his bedside table.

Embarrassingly, the rational scientist couldn't bring himself to keep his composure that well. The succubus on top of him was too good at this. While Senku had no clue what to do in sexual situations, Gen moved with uninhibited confidence. Grabbing his member to apply a shiver-inducing amount of cold lube before making up for that chill by stoking the fire in Senku's belly with a few pumps of his hand.

Once that was done, the demon smiled and sunk down onto him, making them both moan. After that, he didn't offer any teasing or praise. Only focusing on moving his hips and watching Senku's crimson eyes glaze over with lust and his mouth hang open while he panted. Not that the man complained, he was too far gone at that point. All he could do was moan and let the waves of warm euphoria lap at him like waves on a shoreline.

Despite how unbearable the heat was becoming, Senku found that he didn't actually want the demon to stop. keep going. He thought, trying to convey that wild desire with a moan. One that made the succubus riding him chuckle,

"It's okay, Darling. You can cum whenever you want." Gen assured, his tails coiling around Senku's waist to anchor himself to the scientist. Driving the man nuts with the friction. Until the buzzing heat beneath Senku's skin finally reached its peak. The white-hot heat blinding the helpless scientist for a moment. The feeling earning a string of moaned curses.

With that tsunami of euphoria taking away any form of coherent thoughts, Senku was only left with exhaustion. Not even seeming to register if the succubus orgasmed, or when he pulled off of him. Really, all that Senku cared about at that moment was going to sleep.

Notes could wait until tomorrow...or whenever he woke up.

[ashintheairlikesnow]

Ash ash ash, please please a soft lil snippet Jameson and Nat eating waffles and him being soft, (and maybe a lil bit in a submissive head space like in the last drabble with them, but in a sweet way?) pleeeease? -theo-

CW: Discussion of death/murder, recovering whumpee, talk about trauma recovery and PTSD, caretaking

@whumpmasinjuly prompt: secret

Jake Gets Stabbed: One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Ten | Eleven

-

"What the fuck is this?" Jameson stares down at the kitchen table, unsettled, taking a step back and away from it before slowly raising his eyes to look at Natalie Yoder as she leans her back against the kitchen counter, sipping coffee from a plain green mug with a badly-painted fish on the side.

Nat raises her eyebrows at him. "It's a waffle," She says, voice slightly deadpan. He can't tell from the look on her face if she's laughing at him behind her calm expression or not.

"I know what a goddamn waffle is," He snaps back, not moving closer, not yet.

"Then why'd you ask-"

"I want to know why there's a fucking waffle on the table." He crosses his arms in front of himself, glancing down to see the pale pink scars that litter his visible skin from elbow to wrist, drops his hands again as if he can hide them. "That's what. Why is there a waffle, and why does it have fucking berry shit on it, and why's there fucking whipped cream? That's what I want to know."

Nat doesn't react to the anger in his voice, only stays right where she is. The taste of her voice filters into him and makes him want to relax, and he hates that even more than he hates everything else about what his life is like. "Because I woke up wanting waffles, and I asked Naomi to drop some off after she got back from IHOP. Naomi's my neighbor," She adds before he can say anything, not that he gives one single fuck. "She has a little girl, sweetest little thing-"

"I don't care about kids. This is your waffle?" His face colors, embarrassed. He yelled at her about her own fucking food.

"No," She says, voice soft. "I've eaten mine already. This one's yours. I added whipped cream, yours didn't come with it, but I saw you put some on your coffee yesterday out of the fridge and-"

"You were watching me? You watched me do that?" He backs up a step, swallowing against the sudden racing beat of his heart. "Is it-... is it because I was in the kitchen, that you followed me? Were you, uh, were you watching to see if-... if I'd-..."

His eyes go to the knife block, with seven blades of varying sizes and chunky black handles. Just like the knife block in Jake's house. There's a chef's knife there, paring knife, a thin serrated blade for bread, a thinner non-serrated blade for meat, there's-

The exact same kind of knife Jameson had stabbed Jake with, when he saw Brute's face, when he saw Robert's, when he nearly killed someone.

"Were you seeing if I was going to hurt you?" He asks, voice dropping nearly to a whisper.

Nat still doesn't move. If she came towards him right now, he thinks he'd lash out, or bolt back up the stairs to hide in the closet of the room he stays in here. But she stands right where she is, a bit of sunrise light shining on her dark brown braid streaked with hints of silver.

She stays where she is, and so Jameson stays where he is, too.

"No," She says, gently. "I heard a sound and checked to see what it was, it was just the spray-can whipped cream. I'd honestly forgotten I even bought that. I wasn't trying to watch you, sweetheart-"

"Don't fucking call me that," Jameson says, and backs up again, but he aimed badly and instead of backing through the door, he hits the wall. His heart races faster, and he jams his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants to hide that they've started to shake.

"I'm sorry," Nat replies, with sincerity. "Jameson. I wasn't trying to watch you. I don't think you'll hurt me, and I'm not scared of you."

"Why not?" Jameson hunches over, thin shoulders under the threadbare worn t-shirt he wears with a band he's never heard of on the front. But then, he basically hasn't heard of anything. That he knows of, anyway. "Why aren't you scared of me? I could have killed the big guy. I could kill you, I could just start-... start hurting you and hurting you, and there's n-nothing you could do to stop me once I start. I couldn't-... couldn't even stop m-myself."

I can't ever stop myself once I start.

He hates himself for the tears in his eyes, the tremble in his voice. He hates himself for the person he became, to keep living. He can't be trusted, and he can't be safe for Allyn, no matter what anyone says. He'll be here until they give up, and then he'll be shoved out the door, and he'll wind up in a cage again.

He's sure of it.

There isn't any other way out, for him, is there? Maybe he's better off in a cage. Maybe he was better off under Robert's boot. Or everyone else was better off, anyway...

Nat takes in a breath, and she pulls a chair out, scraping along the old tile floor, taking a seat across the table. The house seems to shift a little, settling as comfortably as she does. A soft creaking comes from somewhere else. "You want to hear a secret, Jameson?"

"No," he says immediately, without hesitation. But he pulls a chair out and sits in front of the plate of waffles with the melting whipped cream and too-red strawberries in sauce anyway. "I don't care about your fucking secrets."

"I'm sure you have plenty of your own." Nat takes another sip, and there's a pause. The smell of waffles is one of overwhelming sweetness, and Jameson's stomach growls. He's sure she can hear it, but she doesn't say anything. "But I want to tell you something, and it's not... something I often share. Or really ever share, I guess."

All these people think Jameson cares about their stupid fucking thoughts and life stories. It's unsettling. Jameson picks up a fork and stabs it into the waffle, hesitantly. It's going soft, and it doesn't make the crispy sound he likes. But he spins the fork until he shreds off a bite and eats it, anyway.

It's fine. It's better than fine. It's a good waffle. He's not going to tell her that, though. There's quiet, and she probably wants him to respond, but he doesn't. Let her say whatever she wants while he eats.

Then he can go back upstairs and sleep and make the most of having a bed until they tell him to fuck off. They will, eventually.

"When I was twenty-eight - couple years younger than Jake is now, I guess - I had my third group of rescues. Three or four-... four, definitely four, now that I think about it. Three Platonics and a Domestic." She looks off to the side, not directly at him, and that's... that's kind of nice, too. To not feel pressured to react to what she says. She's looking over at the fridge, where magnets stick postcards and notes she's written to herself.

"What I didn't know was that one of the Platonics was... not. She lied to us, because she was worried we wouldn't take her in if we knew she was, well..."

"Like me," Jameson volunteers, almost against his will. He gestures to himself with a forkful of waffle and cream, then shoves it into his mouth and talks around it while he chews. "Like all of us at the big guy's place."

"Yeah. Like you. There were other things she didn't tell us, too. She had been abandoned by the ones who held her captive, we knew that much - but what we didn't know is that it was because there was an attempt to murder her, and she fought back. She killed one of the people who kept her."

Jameson swallows the bite, but it goes down only with difficulty. He sets his fork down and leans forward. "She did? But, but we-"

"Aren't supposed to. I know. That's the company line, right? Pets are compliant, and pleasant, and unable to lift a finger in their own defense. But let me tell you a little something about WRU and every company like them." Nat leans forward, something briefly fierce in her eyes. "They lie. They lie with every fucking breath, and I should know." She snorts, some dark humor he doesn't understand flitting across her face. "But this young woman, she fought back, and she was abandoned because she defended herself and killed someone in the process. She was only defending herself, Jameson, do you understand? She only wanted to stay alive."

He nods, slowly.

I only wanted not to die there.

"This young woman who came to stay with us attacked me, one night. I said... something, or did something, that brought back that night into her mind, what had happened to her, and in her heart, in her thoughts, she was defending herself again. She was crying as she hurt me. She was begging me to just leave her alone as she swung her fist at my face."

Nat sighs. She sips her coffee again. A mourning dove calls outside the window, the plaintive little call of hoo, hoo... hoo. Jameson can hear, just barely, the shouts of people calling good morning to one another, can taste them sparking briefly on his tongue.

"Obviously I survived," Nat says with a wry smile, gesturing to herself. "I sent the others to a new safehouse, and I kept her at mine."

Jameson frowns. "You let her stay? But she tried to kill you."

"No. She tried to save herself from a threat. I happened to be wearing its face at the time. I called a friend of mine to come stay with me so we weren't alone with her for a while, and we took some time to get her cared for. I made calls, I pulled strings, called in favors... but we figured it out. We got her to see someone who could help in ways I couldn't. She moved out on her own after that. I was hesitant, but... but she insisted. And independence is the end goal, right?"

"Uh. Right, I guess." She seems like she wants an answer, anyway, so Jameson tries to give one.

"She expected that as soon as she became less than standard for our expectations, she would be shoved back out into the cold. I showed her that I was willing to hold out through the hard bits. Some people go through something, and it's not..." Nat takes in a breath. "Trauma isn't a kiln, Jameson."

"I don't know what that is."

"Oh. Uh. It's an oven for cooking pottery, it dries the wet clay and sort of sets it, so it's done after. But what I mean is... you aren't refined by what happened to you. It doesn't build character, it doesn't happen for a reason, whatever people say when they mean well. Violence isn't making you beautiful, you know? We don't expect you to be beautiful."

"Good thing," Jameson says, matching her dry wit from before with a half-smile of his own. "Considering the way I'm cut halfway to hell and ugly as fuck."

"You aren't, but that's not important. For every one who had a home that could be mistaken for loving, there are two others who survived torture, who made it out of hell. And more who didn't. Or who had to carry their hell with them. Do you understand what I mean?"

Does he?

Robert, looking down at the dead girl, turning back to Jameson with a grin. You're still handsome enough. You should start helping me pull 'em in after this. I'll tell 'em my dog ran off, you can be waiting for them. What do you say?

No, sir, I can't-... I can't stand the screaming.

Well, it's them or it's you, dog. Pick who gets to live.

Jameson's hands had tightened around the handle of the shovel. Yes, sir. I choose me.

Good boy. Robert hadn't seen it coming, he'd turned back to kick some dirt onto the dead girl's face when the broad back of the shovel had hit the back of his head.

Jameson shakes off the memory, feeling his body shudder with a swell of old nausea and panic and rage. "Yeah," he says, finally, aware the silence has drawn out again. "Yeah. I understand."

"Good. Now, I can't tell you the name she chose. I can't tell you much about her at all. Her identity is a secret I keep, and I will always keep. Do you want to know why?"

"No." He does, though, and he leans forward, giving the lie to his refusal.

"Because she - along with her spouse - is the current organizational leader of an entire lib movement cell a few states away from here." Nat gives him a smile. "She went from a frightened, angry survivor to someone who has saved more people than I have in two-thirds the time. She asked me to keep the secret of how she started out, and I do."

Jameson nods, slowly. "But, what if... I mean. I don't want to be anybody fucking special. I just want to be me, maybe with someone someday-"

Maybe with Allyn-

"-and i don't give a fuck about saving anyone else. Sorry, I don't. So... what about that? What about someone who doesn't want to help anyone else, ever? What's the fucking point in helping me? I'm not going to be anybody's leadership, I'm not going to do anything for anyone else. What's the point is bringing me here and not just kicking me out like I deserve? Just, you know, get it fucking over with already?"

"Jameson." Nat sighs again, but it's almost affectionate, and something in Jameson twists painfully and warmly at the maternal feel of the sound, the taste of it settling on his tongue. "You don't have to earn the right to live by being good, or worthy, or perfect, or altruistic. You don't earn the right to treatment by having a future someone else says is valuable, by matching their idea of acceptable or... pure or whatever."

He sits back in his seat, watching her, meeting her eyes now. His waffle is nearly forgotten.

"You just are," Nat says quietly, but firmly. "You are here, on this earth, and something terrible was done to you, over and over again. You survived it. You are still alive. That's all you need to be, right now. My secret - one of them, anyway, you get to my age and you'll have a few - is that my friend that everyone knows as who she is today was once terrified, and angry, and some days she still is."

Jameson nods, slowly. "I am, too."

"Yeah. Everyone is, sometimes, I think."

He clears his throat, shifts uneasily in his chair. "I, uh. I have secrets, too. A couple of them."

It's her turn to nod. "They're yours to keep, Jameson."

"No, I know, but..." He looks down at his plate. The whipped cream is just a melted pile of something vaguely gross now. His stomach feels tiny and cramped. "But, uh. I... killed people. Before here. I was trying to kill the big guy because he-... looked like someone I killed before."

His heart hammers in his chest, beats against his ribcage. He feels bruised from it, almost.

Nat is quiet for a second, but she doesn't look scared of him. Or angry at him. She just looks calm. "Okay. Would you be willing to tell Dr. Berger about those experiences?"

"Can I-... could you, uh. Could you call your friend? Who was like me?" He is sure she'll laugh in his face at the idea, and he looks down, steeling himself for the mockery sure to come, ready with a comeback, a dismissal, to say he hadn't meant it and it was just a fucking idea, fuck off. "Can I tell her?"

Natalie Yoder considers for a beat, and then nods. "Of course. If you think it would help."

"Yeah. Uh. I just want... I want to talk to talk to someone who's been, who's done what I did, and you said-... you said she's married now?"

"She is, yeah. Few years back."

"I want to talk to her." He meets Nat's eyes again, tells himself he can trust the warmth in her, that he can trust these people he's given himself over to. That maybe - maybe - they won't turn his trust back on him and hurt him with it. "I want to talk to someone about how to... how to be with someone after."

"Dr. Berger is trained in how to navigate intimacy after-"

"After you've killed someone," He corrects, and swallows hard. "Until-... can you not tell the big guy? Or anyone else? That I've, that I'm a, you know... murderer?"

"Self-defense is not murder," Nat says, low and soft, then nods. "Yes, Jameson. I can keep your secret for now, until you're ready to share it."

Good.

Allyn doesn't have to know the truth.

At least for now.

At least until he knows how to even begin to tell them what he really is.

"Thanks," Jameson says, with real feeling, and shovels another bite of waffle into his mouth.

-

@astrobly @burtlederp @finder-of-rings @whump-tr0pes @raigash @symphony-of-greys @orchidscript @doveotions @pretty-face-breaker @eatyourdamnpears @boxboysandotherwhump @whumptywhumpdump @whumpfigure @outofangband @downriver914 @justabitofwhump @thehopelessopus @butwhatifyouwrite @yet-another-heathen @nonsensical-whump @newandfiguringitout @gonna-feel-that-tomorrow @oops-its-whump @cubeswhump @whumpiary @endless-whump

[hotwings0203]

This is so utterly stupid but I have a few HC’s about Muslim Dabi(again obv this isn’t canon I just think it’s funny)

-Dabi would def be the type of Muslim dude who claims to be super religious cuz he never eats pork and “goes to the mosque to pray”(which is actually just code for hitting a blunt in the back of the parking lot w Hawks and Shigaraki💀), but yet smokes^^ and still has hella sex with like every other girl who bats her lashes at him from across the dining hall

-he also is a big cat lover, he claims since the Prophet Muhammad had cats of his own it’s sunnah to keep one

-on Eid namaz he’s the most dripped out one at the session, I’m talking black kurta dress, nice ass watch, slicked back hair...but funny enough, no one has actually seen him in line for the prayers themselves

-if he were back at home with the rest of the Todoroki’s, he’d most definitely be THE MOST spoiled one. Fuyumi would get on his ass for not cleaning the dishes, but he’d wave her off and tell her it’s training for her to be a better housewife for her future husband(cue a soapy sponge thrown at his head)

-Snitches.Constantly. Bro like this dude catches Shoto on his phone when he’s supposed to be doing a dua? Boom, instant callout followed by a long ass lecture about how he’s straying away from his religion and how he’s going to hell just because he spent one measly moment on his device instead of praising da lord

-Hes also always telling fuyumi to cover up her sleeves that come just a bittt before her wrists, claiming that she’s showing too much skin(especially when Hawks is over, that fucker’s got his eyes on every single one of his family members). But she’s quick to point out his secret tattoos, piercings, and hair dyes. He just scoffs and pulls the “women were created lesser than men so it’s okay for me to act a fool but not for you” card🙄stg I can’t stand him

-Since he’s the closest to Natsu, he’s always giving Eid money to him the most. The dude will slouch against his favorite brothers’ door, watching him play 2K. “What do you want?” Natsu asks with no real malice, not taking his eyes off the changing screen, furiously clicking away on his controller. “Mom says you gotta iron your clothes, Fuyumi’s doing her own so she can’t do yours as well. Oh, and Eid Mubarak by the way.” Natsu pauses him game and stands to stretch his arms above his head, groaning at the tendons popping in place on his back. “Yeah man, you too-what’s that?” He points to a fat parcel in Touya’s hand. The white-haired boy grins and chucks the bulging package at him, which Natsu catches easily. His eyes widen when he tears open the cream-colored paper envelope and reveals dozens of bills exceeding the usual 5-10$ family limit. “Yo, what-how-thanks Touya!” He sputters, throwing the package on his bed and throwing an arm around his brothers’ back in a man-hug. Touya rolls his eyes and barely suppresses a smile at Natsu’s excitement,(something he’s always wanting to be the source of) pounding his back to let go before he asphyxiates. He lets go and Touya smirks before heading towards the door, calling out over his shoulder, “Oh, and I’d thank Sho-turd as well while you’re singing my praise.” Natsu stops in his tracks and looks suspiciously at the withdrawing slender figure. “Why?”. Touya’s voice is distant as he moves to close and lock his door. “‘Cuz it’s his money after all.”

-The two brothers are always waking up at Sehri the earliest in Ramadhan, just so they can scarf down a majority of the food in the fridge and go to sleep without having to interact with the rest of their family at sunrise. And in the case that their family DOES wake up in time to see them chomping down food made for a WHOLE FAMILY and not just two boys, Touya is quick to grab his keys and jacket and cackle that him and Natsu are going to iHop to eat some more. Natsu ofc is quick to follow pursuit, throwing an apologetic grin towards his parents and other siblings.

-When they’re at the mosque and Enji has somehow bullied him enough to sit the hell down and actually ATTEND the lectures for once, Touya still has one up his sleeve. Planned out strategically, he always simpers to Rei that he wants to donate to the mosque, causing her eyes to water and a handful of cash thrown his way, her voice wobbly as she praises her son for actually taking the foundations of his religion seriously. Unbeknownst to her however, this just means that he’ll take a little bit more than he gives. Hawks will be standing at the front of the hall, bowing his head and using his silver tongue to graciously thank the many men and women who come forth to drop their allowance into the money basket. When he sees his best man approaching, he has to stop the smug grin from reaching his ears, instead slanting his brows and holding the basket out to the now black-haired thief. “Glad to see you’re taking eternal damnation seriously, for once,” Keigo flashes his perky whites and Dabi drops Rei’s money into the donation basket, dipping his hand a little lower for a second. “Glad to see you’re still standing here like some busboy peasant, as usual,” he fires back, the two boys catching each other’s eyes and stifling their cackles as the patched hand withdraws, a copious amount of bills in his hand, more than what he put in.

-100% steals shoes. Usually you hear about older men doing this, but age aint nothin’ but a number to Dabi, baby. “Nice kicks,” he nods to a boy Natsu’s age, noting the blue and black minimalist patterns adorning the shoes. The boy recognizes Dabi as one of the most revered figures at the mosque (and the most featured by adults. Who’d want their kid hanging out with the eldest Todoroki as an influence?) and bobs his head excitedly, spewing out the manufacture and release dates of the shoes. Dabi looks at the fanboy amusedly, continuing to lean against the shoe rack as more people crowd around and start to push the boy inside. “See you later Dabi!” The eccentric kid calls out as he’s pushed into the hall by grumbling uncles. The ravenette snickers fo himself, “Yeah, but you won’t be seeing these shoes anytime soon.”

-A notorious playboy in the community. Uncles glare at him, unable to scold him outright for his shenanigans due to his father’s close presence, and aunties steer their children away from him at dinner parties. Speaking of, Dabi’s at a dinner right now. He’s lighting up a joint in amongst 3 mesmerized girls sitting on the floor in front of him and 2 jealous dudes his age in a locked room, away from all the screaming little kids. “Wow Dabi, doesn’t it burn?” The youngest of the three girls asks him with imploring eyes. He smiles a charming smile down at her and he thinks he sees the other two swoon. “Nah, sweetheart, you get used to it after a little while. Don’t be like me though, keep yourself pure and clean,” he shoots a wink at them and they giggle, faces turning red. The other two boys sitting at the far end of the bed scowl at his successful flirting, but Dabi doesn’t care for any of them, honestly, they’re just target practice. Right as he inhaled the fumes of another puff, a little body throws itself at the door, banging its fists on the wood. “It’s time for food!” They all jump at the intrusion and chuckle as the intruder runs away, containing to scream about food being served. The group gets up to leave and exits through the door, but Dabi takes his time. He wasn’t done with his joint, and he has to waft the smell away anyways when he leaves. He’s opening a window to let out some air when he heads a soft shuffle from behind him. “Shows over guys, go eat-“ but when he turns around, the oldest girl of the three stands before him, fiddling with her hands and looking at the floor. “Um, Dabi? I know you said not to try it out by ourselves so...I was wondering if you could-if you could teach me how...?” She looks at the half-used roll in his hand, and he looks from the blunt to her face. He looks behind her. A closed door. Perfect. Taking a step forwards, he relishes in how she takes a hesitant step back, the breath in her throat catching but she still doesn’t back down. She looks to him like he’s a god, and he feels like one right now. And so he steps closer until she’s backed against the wall, his lids lowered to her wide ones, and he placed a hand next to her head. “Didnt your mom ever tell you not to take things from strangers?” He ghosts by the shell of her ear, and she shivers. “She never told me the strangers would be this hot,” and he has to laugh a bit at her tenacity. He pulls away and flops back on the bed, signaling for her to join him. “Well come one then, I’m hungry, better hurry up before I change my mind.” And 5 shotguns later, Dabi barely wipes off her bright pink lipstick from his face and straightens his kurta along with his hair before bounding down the steps, eager for food. At his command, she comes down a minute after him as to not cause any suspicion, but it doesn’t stop Rei from shooting him a knowing glare from the living room as he piles his plate with food. He shoves a veggie roll in his mouth as he turns to join the boys in the dining area, but his path is blocked by a large woman. “I know you’re up to no good. The children told me what funny smell was coming from the room upstairs, and I know you’re to blame, Touya Todoroki. I respect your mother a lot so I won’t make a scene here-“ he interrupts her, mouth half full with a roll, “-I mean, you already kinda are,-“ but she continues her tirade. “-I don’t think you’re a good influence on these kids, especially your siblings. What self respecting family would be okay with their son acting like a hooligan, having piercings, smelling like weed?” He smirks and swallows before swerving around her. “I don’t know Aunty, why don’t you ask your daughter? She didn’t seem to mind my, ah, influence.”

-When they were all younger, there was a time where End*avor wanted the boys the toughen up a bit and stop messing around so much. He brought the family up to the mountains in a nice cabin, purposefully choosing an area with farms nearby. It was around the time of Eid-e-Adha, so naturally goats and sheep’s were going to be sacrificed for the family feast. Touya already knew what was going on, so Enji left it up to him, a scrawny preteen boy to take over the initiation. Fuyumi wanted to come to the farm too, but Touya glared at her and told her to stay home because “girls are too emotional for this.”(he really did think that, but above all he held a secret soft spot for his only younger sister). Natsu and Touya both started heading down to the field to pick out a goat, and ofc little Shoto wanted to come along to. He begged and begged for his older brothers to bring him along and to not leave him at home for once, and with a sly glance to Natsu, Touya relented. He leaned down to Shoto’s eye-level and asked with serious eyes, “You sure?”. Shoto nodded eagerly, standing straight up as to look more solemn and mature. Natsu held back a snicker and grabbed Shoto by the collar as they dragged him out to the pasture. Oh, the little boy was in heaven among the bleating sheep and fluffy coats. “Go ahead, pick one out!” Touya said eagerly, nodding to the clueless toddler to choose a sacrificial sheep. And so the heterochromatic child pointed to one, looking to his big brothers for assurance, to which they gave an excited nod. Shoto yelped with glee and spent the rest of the afternoon frolicking with the soon-to-be-mutton chops, completely oblivious to its grim fate and creating a bond with the animal. So when it was finally sunset and the time came to start preparing for the feast, Touya walked over leisurely to Shoto, pushed the grubby hand away from the animal’s collar, and started pulling the creature towards the chopping block. “W-what’re you doing?” Shoto asked uncertainty. “Well, we gotta eat, right? Thanks for picking out such a fat sheep, ‘wonder how it’s gonna taste,”. The eldest grinned with malice at his youngest brother, who started to sniffle and ball his fists. “You’re lying! Leave it alone!” He cried out. “Nope, m’not lying, ask Natsu.” Natsu turns to Shoto and shrugs his shoulders without any real regret. “You’re the one who wanted to come along, right? Think of how proud dad will be of his favorite-he finally sacrificed his first sheep!”

-the first time he was ever asked to lead the namaz, Keigo and Tomura kept kicking the back of his legs so he would fall over while trying to recite the prayers, and in turn he’d immediately whip around in the middle of the whole damn hall and shoot fire at the two howling boys. Needless to say, he was never asked to read again

(one would think since Dabi knows sooo much about being a gOoD mUsLim and how to follow the rules he’d take some of that advice HIMSELF)

[joyful-soul-collector]

The name’s Seven

This is a continuation of one of my other snippetys called I immediately regret this decision! So you may want to read that one before you read this, but it’s not 100% required lol.

“This the place?” Tatum asked, picking up Loch and resting him on his hip as they got out of the car. 

“Yep,” said Art. “IHOP. Best pancakes you’ll ever eat in your life. At least to me anyway. It’s one of my favorite places to eat. No matter what foster home I get sent to, there’s always an IHOP around, so it’s like a nice little constant.”

“So they have food there?” Tatum said. At this point he was less concerned with Art’s life story and more worried about how Loch was shaking a little.

“Yep! You guys can get whatever you want, it’s on me. Well, it’s on my parents, but they don’t know that,” Art said, holding up a wad of bills pulled from his pocket.

When they entered the building Tatum was so assaulted with all the delicious smells that he stopped in his tracks. Both his and Loch’s stomachs rumbled loudly, and Loch actually gave a squeak of surprise at the sound. Tatum glanced at Loch, who had a pained grimace on his face.

“Hey, are you okay kiddo?” Tatum whispered so only Loch could hear. Loch nodded, but didn’t seem very sure of himself. He was still shaking. Before Tatum could say anything else to Loch, Art tapped him on the shoulder and nodded towards someone waiting on a bench. 

They had dark skin, not quite as dark as Art’s, but definitely darker than his own, and completely white, scraggly hair tied back in a short, low ponytail. One of their eyes was white and the other was dark grey, almost as dark as Tatum’s eyes. The person wore a white t-shirt and baggy blue jeans held up by a black belt. When they saw the three of them, they picked up a pair of forearm crutches leaning on the seat beside them. It was then that Tatum noticed one of their legs was a little smaller and twisted looking, though it was hard to tell under the loose pants. They started towards the three, a large grin spreading on their face.

“And by ‘friends’ you meant a friend,” Tatum said to Art in a low voice. 

“‘Friends’? Oh, right, sorry, they use they/them pronouns, I said ‘they’ and you thought there was more than one,” Art said with a laugh. “As if I were cool enough to have more than one friend at work.”

“Ohhhh,” Tatum said. 

“Artieeeeeeee,” the kid said as they approached, lifting a hand off their crutch and smacking Art’s outstretched hand. Their mismatched eyes moved to Tatum and Loch, and they gave a nod in greeting. 

“The name’s Seven,” they said. 

“Your name is Seven?” Loch said before Tatum could answer. Tatum was about to apologize for Loch’s rudeness, but Seven played it off. 

“Hells yeah it is. What’s your name squirt?”

“Loch!” Loch said. 

“Loch? What, like a lake?”

“What’s a lake?”

“It’s a loch.”

“I’m not a lake, I’m a boy!”

“Tatum,” Tatum said. 

“...Fair enough squirt.”

Seven raised their eyes to Tatum. “And who are you doom-and-gloom?”

“Loch and Tatum,” Seven said. “Well I'm starved, so how ‘bout we get seated? We should be able to get our food pretty quick, not many people have breakfast for dinner like us weirdos.” 

While Seven was right that the restaurant wasn’t exactly full, they definitely weren’t the only people there. Waiters bussled to and fro, and the air was filled with chatter. Seven and Art sat on one side of the booth while Tatum sat on the other with Loch perched on his leg so he could reach the table. The waiters had offered them a booster seat, but Loch was content with Tatum’s leg, and honestly, Tatum was terrified of letting go of Loch when he was shaking like this. He kept his hand curled safely around Loch’s middle while they scanned the options. 

Loch stared at the menu like it was a treasure chest full of all his favorite rocks. Tatum could feel Loch’s stomach growling under his hand, getting particularly great when he saw a picture of a stack of pancakes covered in rainbow sprinkles and whipped cream. Loch pointed at it and looked at Tatum, who smiled and nodded. Tatum showed his and Loch’s decisions to Art, who ordered it for them since they couldn’t read the words on the menu. 

Seven proved to be a good distraction from Tatum’s biting hunger. They were witty and sarcastic, and make Loch laugh with silly voices and faces. They weren’t afraid of swearing, even around Loch, which Tatum somehow appreciated. It made him feel more comfortable around them. He liked that Seven didn’t change their personality for anyone, they were themself and didn’t care what anyone thought. 

But as a few more minutes went by, Seven’s voices and faces didn’t seem like enough to distract Loch. He stared at every waiter, every customer eating their food, eyes wide with want. His stomach snarled and clenched constantly, and he would wince at the pain every once in awhile. It wasn’t until Seven pointed it out, that Tatum realized Loch was covering his nose with his hand as well. 

“You trying to hide or somethin’ squirt?” Seven said, gesturing to Loch’s face. He quickly put down his hands.

“Nope!” he chirped. Seven laughed, then resumed their conversation with Art. 

Tatum turned to Loch and whispered, “Are you okay? Is something wrong?” 

Loch started to shake his head when a waiter walked past them with a platter full of pancakes. He froze, then clapped a hand over his nose and mouth. His eyes welled with tears.

“Loch? Oh baby--”

Loch suddenly shoved out of Tatum’s hold, hand still over his face, and ran towards the entrance. 

“Loch? Loch! Come back!” Tatum said, jumping up. He looked at Art and Seven, who were both getting ready to chase after Loch with him, Seven reaching for their crutches. “It’s okay, just say here, I’ll get him,” Tatum said, chasing after Loch. 

For someone so small, Loch was surprisingly fast, and rounded the corner to the entrance within seconds, while it took a bit longer for Tatum to get there. When Tatum burst out the doors, he saw Loch sitting on a bench, bawling and hugging his abdomen. 

“Loch?! Loch, baby, you can’t run away from me like that. What’s wrong? Tell me, I can help,” Tatum said, rushing over to Loch and crouching in front of him. 

“It smells! So many smells!” Loch wailed. 

“Smells? What do you mean?”

“The smells! Smells-- I can’t do it!”

“I’m sorry, I just don’t understand you Loch,” Tatum said. 

“I can smell the food Tay! I can smell all the things!” Loch sobbed. And it clicked. Why Loch’s stomach wouldn’t stop grumbling, why he covered his nose, why he started to cry when a waiter walked too close with a patter full of food. 

Tatum had completely forgotten about Loch’s acute sense of smell. He was a shark Syreni after all, and just like Tatum could use echolocation, Loch could smell far better than the average person. 

Right then, a couple walked out of the restaurant, and Loch sat up ramrod straight as no doubt the scent of delicious food wafted through the doors. His belly let out a pitiful rumble and he howled in frustration, but before Tatum could do anything, Loch raised a little fist and started hitting his stomach. 

“Stop it! Be quiet! No more! Be quiet!” Loch shouted, beating his fists into his middle as hard as he could.

“Woah! No, no Loch stop!” Tatum grabbed Loch arms and held them still. When Loch couldn’t free himself he started kicking his legs, still screaming and crying. 

“Lemme go! It won’t be quiet!”

“Loch, stop, you’re not allowed to hit yourself!”

“Lemme go!” 

“No! You listen to me, you do not hurt yourself. That is against the rules, we don't hit people Loch, that includes you."

"It won't be quiet Tay! I want my tummy to be quiet…" Loch said. He stopped struggling and started to cry even harder. "I'm sorry." 

Any anger Tatum felt immediately evaporated. 

"Oh no it's okay, it's okay Little Loch, I'm the one who should be sorry, it's okay baby," Tatum let go of Loch's arms and hugged him, pressing Loch's head into his chest with his hand. He picked him up off the bench, then sat down with Loch in his lap. 

Loch sat and cried for a few minutes. Tatum rubbed Loch’s belly gently and whispered words of comfort, hoping to alleviate the pain. He’s too small, Tatum thought. Too thin, too tiny. I’ve seen four year olds before, he’s not nearly big enough. And how can someone so small be so sad? It doesn’t feel right. You’d think he was too little to be so sad, his body just isn’t big enough to hold all that emotion inside him.

When Loch calmed down a bit, and Tatum was confidant he wouldn’t start hitting himself again, he let him sit up. 

“Why didn’t you tell me it was getting too much? You lied to me Loch.”

“I dunno. I wanted to talk to Seven more. But it hurted my tummy so I closed my nose. Then it was okay.”

Tatum sighed, resting his chin on Loch’s head. 

“You gotta tell me when things aren’t okay. You don’t have to be okay all the time. Just tell me when something is wrong, alright? I might not always be able to fix it, but I’d like to know,” Tatum said. 

“M’kay. I’ll tell you next time.”

"Good. Do you think you can go inside now?" Tatum asked. Loch eyed at the doors cautiously, the grimace on his face saying he would rather not. Tatum glanced around for something that might help him. He wasn't sure what he wanted, but when he saw a bush covered in those bright, anemone-like plants, he knew that was the solution. 

Tatum leaned over and took one from the bush. 

"You remember these things?" he said, holding up the colorful plant. 

"Flowers!" Loch said. "They smell nice." 

"That's right. What if you took this in with you? You could smell it whenever you start to feel too hungry, or when someone walks by with food. How does that sound?" 

Loch considered the flower for a moment, then nodded, taking the flower and clutching it in his trembling hands. 

Tatum dabbed the tears away from Loch's face with his sleeve, and lifted him up, resting him on his hip again. 

"Ready?"

"Yep."

They walked in, Loch's flower pushed under his nose. Art and Seven were there waiting for them, both looking anxious. For some reason it made Tatum happy to see people worried about them. It was nice to know they cared. 

"Everything aight?" Seven said. 

"Yeah, he was just a little overwhelmed. We’re okay now though, right Little Loch?" Tatum said, sitting down. 

Loch only nodded. 

"Aw, I'm sorry squirt. Glad you're all good now though! I’m startin' to get attached to ya, wouldn’t wantcha to get hurt," Seven said. They reached across the table and ruffled Loch's hair, and Loch smiled. 

It was a few more agonizing minutes before food was finally set in front of them. Loch trembled with hunger and excitement, and wasted no time in picking up one of his rainbow sprinkled pancakes and tearing off a large bite, not paying any attention to the syrup sitting next to him. Loch’s flower lay forgotten beside his plate as Tatum held him steady for a minute or so, knowing he could barely hold himself upright at this point. Tatum didn’t give his own food even a glance; he hadn’t really paid attention when he picked it out anyway, and he was just happy Loch finally got something in his belly. 

“Tatum, eat,” Art said seriously. Art pushed Tatum’s plate of what Art called “eggs and toast” closer to him. When Tatum didn’t take it right away, Loch grabbed one of the slices of toast and shoved it under Tatum’s nose.

“Make your tummy quiet. I can hear it,” Loch said, low enough that neither Art or Seven could overhear. 

Tatum wouldn’t have noticed if Loch didn’t point it out, but it seems Loch’s wasn’t the only belly growling. Tatum had thought his stomach was past complaining at this point, it’s been three days since he’s eaten, he assumed it would’ve given up by now. He hadn’t realized just how empty he was until he swallowed his first bite, and then suddenly the hunger was like a long lost memory rushing to the surface. Tatum then wolfed down his pancakes and eggs, savoring every single bite. 

“You can’t beat IHOP,” Seven said, moaning at the taste of their eggs. “The food at the shelter isn’t nearly as good as this.”

Tatum didn’t know what Seven meant by ‘the shelter’, but Art froze. 

“Food at the shelter?” Art said slowly. “You’re homeless?” Tatum knew what that meant. 

“Yeah! You didn’t know that?” Seven said, like it was no big deal. “I thought everyone at work knew.”

“I didn’t,” Art said solemnly.

“Really? Not even a little bit suspicious?” Seven said with a snort. 

“Well you’re not exactly wearing a tag that says ‘Hello I’m Homeless!’ on it.”

“Sure I am! It’s on one of the three shirts I own, I probably just left it in my backpack back at the shelter.”

“Stop saying sad stuff like it’s a joke!” Art whined.

“Oh then you definitely don’t wanna hear about how great my shower was at the YMCA, they had a disability bathroom with a seat, it was real fancy--”

“Sssssstoppppppp--"

"I'm just saying you should've been able to tell just from my clothes. You could say I have a poor sense of fashion--"

"SEVEN!"

Seven erupted into a fit of laughter, ducking their head and pounding their fists on their knees. 

"God I love making people feel guilty like that, it's fuckin hilarious man," they said, taking a bite of their food. 

Tatum smiled at Seven, who gasped and pointed at Tatum's face. 

"I got Doomsday Boy to smile! Now I just gotta getcha to talk and we're on our way to bein' best of friends."

Tatum made a snap decision that if he had thought about more, he might not have made. 

“We’re homeless too,” he said. 

“YO what? No way!” Seven said. They were almost excited, happy there was someone around their age they could relate to. But their face suddenly fell as they looked at Loch, still cramming pancakes into his mouth. 

“The squirt too, huh?”

“Yeah.” 

“But, he’s young enough for the foster system. Me 'n you have aged out, but Loch hasn’t,” Seven said. Tatum glanced at Art, who answered for him. 

“Tatum is actually seventeen, so they both are young enough, but they have had some really bad experiences with the system. They’re kind of on the run right now, until Tatum turns eighteen. I’m helping them.”

Seven gazed at Tatum and Loch, and for the first time their mismatched eyes were actually somber and quiet. Loch looked up from his plate at the lack of conversation. 

“Are you sad Seven?” Loch asked, a dollop of whipped cream on his cheek. Tatum expected Seven to lie, but they didn’t. 

“A little bit.”

“Why?”

Seven opened their mouth, then closed it, then opened it again. 

“You and your brother have a hard time sometimes. Makes me sad you gotta go through that.”

“Oh.” Loch stared at Seven for a moment, then suddenly hopped out of Tatum’s lap. He crawled under the table and came up on the other side right next to Seven, then hugged them tightly around their neck.

“Oh--Haha! Aw, you don’t have to worry about me, squirt,” Seven said. But they hugged him back anyway. Tatum watched as they paused a little when their hand met his ribs, smoothing a thumb over the bumps. They glanced at Loch’s plate, which only had half a pancake left and smiled a little. 

“Ya almost cleaned your plate! Musta been pretty hungry,” they said as Loch released them. 

Loch hesitated, looking at Tatum for instructions. 

“It’s okay, they’re nice,” Tatum said. Loch looked back at Seven, then nodded. 

“Pretty hungry,” Loch echoed. “Good now though. All filled up.”

“Good job squirt.”

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If you want to be added or removed from the tag list, don’t hesitate to ask! I don’t mind either way!

[kpoptextauwu-archive]

Three to Start

-----------

Summary:  Maybe a family wasn’t always a mother and father, maybe it was two boys who came into your life and one you found, maybe it was the simple touches and smiles or a series of dreams, maybe that's what made a family.

Pairing: Jeno x Mark (platonic) 

               Renjun x Mark (platonic)

               Haechan x Mark (could be seen as romantic if you want)

               Jeno x Renjun (I see it as romantic its up to you tho)

Prompt: Fantasy AU!

               Fluff

Requested: No

Note: This is the 2nd to last part to the series by me and @ihf-ihop-ihi click here to read the rest 

Warning(s): Johnny commits suicide but it's not descriptive at all like you can barely tell. Also, I made Ten and Doyoung dead out of spite against Froot Loops bc she got mad at me for writing angsty fics where members die. 

Third POV;

The first one was Jeno. The fallen angel boy who fell from the sky, who seemed hard on the outside but was secretly the softest boy Mark had ever met. He had also become Marks first and only friend. Mark remembered the day he found him, his parents had another screaming match with him that day he went to visit so he ran. He was sick of their constant nagging and constant hate they put on him. All his life he was made out to be a disappointment because of his scales, and horns and glowing, color changing eyes. 

    As soon as the screaming had begun he grabbed the bag he brought with his clothes and book and left. He ran and ran letting his feet carry him wherever they wanted not thinking about the consequences. In this case, he ended up meeting one of his closest and most trusted friends. 

    When he stopped running he found himself in the woods by the city park and fairly deep in, it was a miracle he hadn't face planted or tripped over anything. As he realized where he was he slowed down to a walk to catch his breath. It had been raining when he left but now it was barely drizzling and the moon was peeking out from in between the trees. Mark sighed as he walked, being careful not to trip over anything until he walked into a small clearing. 

    On the edge of the clearing, he found a boy. Not just any boy but a shirtless one without shoes and soaked to the brim. He stepped closer to the boy taking him in. He didn't seem to be cold in the slightest even though the air was chilly and he was drenched, in fact, he seemed to be at peace as he slept. The boy's face was soft and incredibly handsome along with the rest of him, although Mark tried not to stare. 

    He watched for a few moments before he realized that it was a little creepy that he was watching a boy sleep in the woods. Blinking a couple times he rubbed his hands against his pants and sighed. He couldn’t just leave the boy here but if he woke him up there could be a chance he would get punched in the face, which he would rather not have. He pursed his lips in thought as he continued to watch over the boy, watching him roll over slightly. His eyes widened as he watched him roll over, the boys back had two long painful looking wounds across it. A huff fell out of Mark’s mouth, he truly couldn’t leave this boy now but he really wasn’t sure what he could do. 

    A breeze blew through the trees and Mark felt his bag bounce on his leg. He put a hand down to stop it and felt his finger brush against one of his long shirts and he paused. Slowly he brought out the shirt and placed his bag on the ground. He carefully folded it and took a breath stepping out of the trees he had been hiding behind. The sun was starting to come out as he quietly made his way over to the sleeping boy and placed the folded black shirt next to him. As he started to stand up the boy rolled over again kicking the shirt lightly and Mark froze, praying he wouldn’t wake up. 

    A sigh left Mark’s mouth as the boy just mumbled something in his sleep, but his eyes didn’t open. He quickly, but quietly made his way back into the trees where he had been hiding and watched as the boy opened his eyes. Mark watched him curiously until the boy's eyes made contact with his. He watched as the boy's eyes widened when they caught Mark's and sat up looking for him, but Mark was gone. He ran until he made it back to the park that connected to the woods.

    He gasped as he harshly breathed in placing his hands on his knees in an attempt to catch his breath. When he finally managed to catch his breath, he made his way over to one of the park benches and sighed, he didn’t want to go back to his house yet and he was slightly curious if the boy in the woods would come out. He chewed on his lip for a moment before reaching into his bag and bringing out his book, opening it to his bookmarked place and began to read quietly glancing up every once in a while to see if the boy had come out. 

    Mark only got to read a chapter of his book before he saw the boy he had given the shirt to step out, wearing his shirt. He pursed his lips and watched as the boy took in his surroundings his face void of emotion. He watched until the boy found Mark making Mark quickly look back to his book, shrinking slightly as he felt the boy approach him. 

    “Excuse me,” the boy said once he reached Mark.

    Mark simply hummed in response not looking up.

    “I was wondering if you could tell me where I was? I’ve never been here before and I’m a little, lost,” the boy said not leaving. 

    Mark mumbled a quiet reply about being in a park continuing not to look up. He didn’t know how the boy would react if he saw him. 

    He heard the boy huff, probably annoyed with how Mark was acting, “I can’t hear you, either speak louder or look up.” 

    Mark tensed slightly but slowly raised his head repeating what he said to the boy. He hardly heard himself as he spoke though, watching how the boy's eyes widened with recognition and took a step back. 

        A week passed since Mark’s fateful encounter with Jeno and it still bothered him. He had a deep feeling inside of him to find him again. He was getting restless so he made a quick decision grabbing his cloak off his bed and taking off. 

    The walk to the wood wasn’t far, thankfully, and Mark made it in record time. He had started wandering around the wood hoping to find Jeno even though, deep down, he knew it was a lost cause. He had probably gone to his house, or wherever he came from. Mark continued to walk around aimlessly until he began to approach a cave. His broke a couple sticks under his feet as he approached but he didn’t stop until he was right outside. Taking a breath he walked into the cave only to be met with partial light. 

    A couple of steps in and a sharp pain struck his head, small unintelligible whispers spreading around him. He was brought out of his daze and the headache faded as he heard someone clear their throat behind him. He whipped around until he was face to face with Jeno. 

        During that day in the cave, Mark had made a silent promise to himself. A promise to protect Jeno even though he could tell Jeno didn’t need it. Jeno had grown on him slowly but surely, which is how he found himself bringing Jeno pillows and clothes to his cave. 

    No matter how much he enjoyed taking all these things to Jeno every day it was starting to get tiresome, it would be so much easier if Jeno just lived with him. That’s how he found himself making a deal with Jeno in his cave one day and watching as Jeno pulled up his shirt to let Mark see his wounds. 

    The wounds were even more painful looking on full display, even though Mark knew Jeno couldn’t feel anything. Mark couldn’t help himself as he walked up to Jeno hesitantly reaching out a hand and brushing his fingers against them.

    The moment his fingers brushed against them, he gasped, and suddenly he was no longer in the cave instead, he was out by a cliff, a thrashing lake below it and rain pounding in his eyes. A tall boy stood by the edge of the cliff his shirt soaked through with rain and hair dangling in his eyes. 

    "Johnny... please... move away from the cliff..." Mark heard himself say much to his confusion. Who was this, he didn't know a Johnny and how did he get here, he was just in a cave with Jeno. 

    "You don't understand Jeno I can't anymore," the boy, Johnny, screamed. Mark only got more confused. Jeno? Last he checked he wasn't Jeno. 

    "Johnny please listen to me. I need you to step away from the cliff, it's dangerous." Mark, or Jeno, or whoever he was replied. 

    Johnny just smiled a bittersweet smile at him, "thank you for being my friend Jeno. I appreciate it," and with those final words, the boy took a step back. Mark screamed as he watched him fall, fall, fall...

    Then he was back in cave standing in front of Jeno who was harshly glaring at him. "Don't. Touch," Jeno hissed coldly, "I can't control what you see."

    Mark nodded his eyes glazed over as images of the boy on the cliff filtered his mind. Instead of asking he continued to pick up the pillows that were scattered around. "What are you doing?" Jeno asked, throwing his shirt back on. 

    Mark rolled his eyes, "Packing for you to come live with me. We had a deal, remember?” He would ask Jeno about the boy later. 

    Mark brought Jeno into his apartment with all the pillows and clothes showing him where his room was. 

    "Hey I'll be back in a bit I'm gonna get the rest of your stuff. Follow me after you finish putting the stuff we just brought in your room," Mark said putting down the last pillow on the couch. 

    Jeno huffed but nodded opening the door to his room and placing the armful of blankets he had on the spare bed. "Alright." 

    Mark walked out shouting a quick bye to Jeno and made his way towards the forest again. He had just set foot in the woods when a boy rushed passed him quiet sobs coming out of his mouth. Mark stepped tentatively over the branches and rocks lining the forest ground, following swiftly after the sobbing boy. 

Mark carefully pulled the hood of his cloak closer to his face. Casting darker shadows over his scaly skin. His forest green eyes twinkled as he watched the smaller boy stagger and sob. Upon hearing the faint sobbing Mark felt an ache of remembrance fill his chest. Without thinking he began to follow the sound until he came across what appeared to be a fellow hybrid sobbing. 

The sobbing boy slowed to a stop in a small clearing. Mark stayed within the shadowy trees, hiding his presence while he observed weeping boy. 

The boy tilted his head back, quietly whimpering. Mark gazed sympathetically at him, watching as his shoulder softly shook and his chest moved quickly. The wind began to pick up, a ruffling breeze flowing over the fawn boy, causing him to shiver. His long brown locks getting tangled into his antlers. Marks attention was piqued. His palms began to sweat, and his stomach abruptly churned, a silent whispering laugh swirling around him. Mark blinked rapidly and shook his head. 

The fawn covered his face with his hands, his eyes tightly shut, blocking out the light shining through the trees. Mark silently stepped out from the shadows to revealed himself. "Why so blue Deery?" Mark called in a quiet voice, a murky shadow concealing Mark's lurking figure. The boy looked up instantly, frightened by the new voice, urgently looking around for the voice, "W-What?" He stammered, wrapping his arms around himself. 

"I said, why so blue little deer?" Mark reiterated, stepping out of the shadows to reveal his figure. The boy shivered, rubbing his arms gingerly. His lower lip quivering. "I-I... I'm not wanted." He whimpered, casting his gaze down to the mossy ground. 

Mark felt his heart pull, a wash of sympathy flooded Mark as he stepped closer to the boy. He crouched down in front of him. Marks glowing green eyes piercing into the boys almost black doe eyes. 

     "What's your name deer?" Mark hummed softly. Placing a hand on the boy's knee. "R-Renjun." He whispered fearfully, he looked into Mark's glowing eyes. "Renjun," Mark repeated. His eyes ghosted over Renjun's appearance. Mark extended his hand to Renjun, pulling him to his feet. "Come along now. You've other places to b-be." Mark hummed, his vision becoming blurry as he watched Renjun rub his eyes before taking Mark's hand, instantly trusting Mark. 

  "W-What's your name?" Renjun mumbled, following behind Mark blindly. Mark cast a glance over his shoulder, a wispy smile playing at his lips. "Mark." He responded. Renjun jumped with alarm as he heard his name, remembering what had just happened when he trusted a human. Renjun ripped his hand out of Mark's, fearfully staggering back. "Y-You're an h-human." Renjun tripped over his words, his hands pulled tightly to his chest. 

Mark bit the thick of his lip, conflicted about revealing himself.

   Small glass like tears slowly rolled down Renjun's flushed red cheeks. His lower lip gently quivering. Mark felt a tug in his chest, deciding against the prior warning of revealing himself to strangers, and slid the hood of his cloak off his head. Keeping his gaze cast downward, only the gentle curl of his horns visible. The quiet crunch of dead leaves rang in Mark's sensitive ears. A tender hand gently touched his cheek, he flinched away from Renjun's cold fingertips. Renjun took Mark's face in his hands, carefully lifting his face. Mark looked into Renjun's eyes, expecting disgust and hatred; but all Mark found was a tender warmth. Renjun giggled softly, using the sleeve of his jumper to rub his eyes. Renjun smiled at Mark, his unique snaggletooth fully displayed. 

Mark was utterly confused by Renjun. Renjun so easily found peace with Mark's disheveled appearance and accepted the fact he had blue scales crawling up his neck, disrupting his skin with jagged bumps. "You're a Hybrid." Renjun hiccuped, a small excited tone in his words. Mark nodded, still amazed by Renjun's ability to accept Mark's appearance. 

"You're not scared?" Mark inquired, unable to wrap his mind around what was happening. Renjun scrunched his nose, a pleased smile playing at his lips, and a pink blush crawling up his neck. "You're beautiful. I don't mind your scales, I think they're fascinating." Renjun complimented. Playing with a flower that captured his attention. Mark exhaled shakily, unsure if he heard correctly. Mark shook his head, gently taking hold of Renjun's hand again and pulling him towards the cave that Jeno had recently vacated. 

Mark neared the cave, listening to Renjun mumble about the pretty flowers he saw as they were walking. Realizing how vocal Renjun was and began to notice how easily distracted Renjun was. Having to retrieve Renjun multiple times from scampering after a squirrel or something of the sort. He decided it was easier to just hold Renjun's hand so he wouldn't wander away.

  "The flower I saw was blue, but it had other blue colors in it like light blue and- Hey! Look a butterfly! I like butterflies, butterflies are pretty. Mark, do you like butterflies?" Renjun hummed, happily swinging their intertwined hands. Mark chuckled at Renjun's childlike tendencies.   

   "Yes Renjun, I like butterflies," Mark answered. An amused twinkle in his forest green irises. Mark lead Renjun into the cave, listening to Renjun suddenly change the topic from what flavor leaf was his favorite to how much he disliked the dark. "Mark." A voice beckoned suddenly, coming closer. Jeno stood full stature, shoulder broad and back as he glared sharply at the fawn-like boy behind Mark. 

Renjun had been too distracted by a songbird passing overhead to notice the death glares being sent his way. When Renjun's gaze returned, he rubbed his light pink nose. Jeno froze, analyzing the softer boy with judgemental eyes. Renjun's cheeks were flushed, spreading across his nose and staining the tip of his nose red from crying. The outer rings of his delicate doe eyes were red and bloated. Dirt smudged on his flushed cheeks from tears he had wiped away. Renjun connected eyes with Jeno, as if looking into Jeno's soul. Renjun tilted his head to the side with a look of confusion as he glanced over Jeno's figure. 

  "Jeno, this is Renjun. He's a deer hybrid." Mark introduced, releasing Renjun's hand. Renjun snapped his eyes to Mark, slightly flustered that Mark let go of their hands; Renjun had been enjoying holding hands. He gently huff, his dark eyes twinkling as he looked away. Jeno blinked rapidly as he stepped forward, grabbing Renjun by the shoulder.  

  Renjun gave a small frightened gasp as he was suddenly pulled, peering up at Jeno through his lashes. Jeno slid a finger across Renjun's smudged cheek, removing a single tear that had escaped his eye. Jeno faintly saw white freckles through the smudged dirt on his plump cheeks. 

  Jeno quickly linked hands with Renjun and lead him out of the cave and over to a Lake. Gently cupping water in his hands and rubbing it against Renjun's dirty face. Renjun closed his eyes, allowing Jeno to prune him. Jeno gently wiped away the layers of dirt built up on his soft skin, presenting the magnificent white freckles littered across his sharp cheek. Renjun's eyes fluttered open, looking between Jeno's eyes with adoration. 

  "I'm Jeno." He softly introduced. Renjun grinned widely, Jeno noticed his small snaggletooth but quickly focused back on the beaming boy. "You're my new friend." Renjun declared in a gentle tone, attaching himself to Jeno. Jeno was shocked but carefully wrapped his arms around Renjun's waist. 

    Mark watched in awe, gobsmacked by Jeno's sudden gentleness directed towards Renjun. Jeno never treated Mark like that, only had he been sassed and bitterly replied too. But with Renjun, Jeno acted like a different person. Mark sighed, shaking his head as he watched Renjun become distracted by a cicada, making Jeno come to look at it too. Mark felt a smile rise to his face as he watched them interact. Wandering back to the cave, Renjun happily included Mark in his endless conversations about everything and anything.

    Days had passed since Mark had found Renjun and Jeno and he visited the small deer boy every day. There was never a dull moment with Renjun as he was always talking about something. Mark had noticed that Jeno especially had grown close to him. Whenever they would show up at the cave to see him Renjun would shout and throw his arms around Jeno happily, which Jeno would always gladly return as Mark would watch awe-struck. Whenever he tried to touch or hug Jeno he would get his shoulder punched and a nasty glare. 

    This day was like all the others with Mark and Jeno making their way from their apartment to the cave to see Renjun. They had been casually crossing the street, Mark leading, when a speeding car came shooting down the turn heading straight for Mark. “Mark!” Jeno shouted noticing the car. 

    Mark turned back to look at him confused, not noticing the car. Jeno gasped and quickly pushed Mark out of the way sending him sprawling on the other side of the road while they car rammed straight into Jeno sending him flying back. 

    “Jeno!” Mark shouted scrambling to his feet ignoring the cuts and scrapes he had along his body. He ran up to him and sighed out of relief when he saw Jeno laying there blinking, his once white shirt speckled red. 

    “Dear gods Jeno, why would you do that you can’t scare me-“ Mark started to ramble as the owner of the car ran up to them. 

    “Shut,” Jeno said holding up a finger to Mark telling him to be quiet, “Stop talking, its gonna take a moment for the ribs to heal.”

    Mark just nodded closing his mouth obediently. Never had he been gladder Jeno was basically immortal minus the wounds where his wings were. “Oh my god is he okay I am so, so, so sorry I will pay for any medical bills,” the driver said rushing up to where Mark stood over Jeno. 

    “Oh yeah he’s fine just give him a second,” Mark replied nodding. 

    “I wouldn’t say the same about you though,” Jeno replied from the ground as he pushed himself up. 

    The driver stared at them shocked, that impact should have killed him. “What- What are you?”

    Jeno rolled his eyes as he glared at the man, his features seething. “What’s your name?”

    “Jaehyun,” the driver answered cautiously, still shocked from how Jeno was completely fine. 

    “Alright Jaehhyun, I want you to apologize to my friend here for almost hitting him,” Jeno said stiffly. 

    Jaehyun opened and closed his mouth a couple times before turning to look at Mark, “I’m- I’m sorry for almost hitting you.”

    “Apology accepted,” Mark replied trying to stifle a laugh at the man’s flabbergasted expression. 

    “Great and one more thing,” Jeno said grabbing Jaehyun's shirt and punching him square in the face, “watch where your going next time.”

    Mark laughed next to him as Jeno let go of his shirt and grabbed Mark’s wrist dragging him towards the forest to continue their visit to Renjun. 

     That night a bright gold light shone out of Jeno’s room. Mark knight his eyebrows and got up from the couch where he had been watching a movie. He walked up to Jeno’s door and knocked gently with no response. After he had knocked the third time he gently opened the door to find Jeno floating over his bed a gold light enveloping him. 

    “Jeno!” He screamed running up to try and grab onto Jeno and pull him back down, only for his hand to pass right through Jeno. He screamed Jeno’s name again as the gold light started to fade Jeno along with it until it was gone, and so was Jeno. 

        Three days passed since Jeno’s disappearance and both Mark and Renjun had been a mess. When Jeno didn’t show up to their daily visit the night after Renjun had cried as he hugged Mark. 

    When the next day passed with no Jeno, Renjun had sobbed into Mark’s arms making Mark’s heartbreak. Renjun shouldn’t cry, he should always be happy. 

    The third day was when he couldn’t handle it himself and somehow found himself slipping under a fence and sitting on the shore of a lake, throwing rocks into it. He hadn’t noticed any difference in the water until one of the rocks he had thrown at it shot back out and hit him in the head. 

    "Ow! What the hell was that?" Mark shouted rubbing the spot on his head where the rock hit. 

     “What the hell was that?” A voice replied in front of Mark. 

    Mark’s head shot up and he looked around widely trying to find the source of the voice but he couldn’t find one. “Who said that?”

    “…Said that” the same voice replied almost sounding annoyed. 

    Mark quickly jumped to his feet still looking around for the voice, "Who's there? Why can't I see you?"

    "...Can't I see you." The voice replied again. 

    Mark took a couple steps back his body trembling slightly "I-I promise I won't hurt you or do anything just please stop repeating me and show yourself."

    "...Show yourself." The voice said again sounding very annoyed with Mark. 

    Mark took a deep breath and glanced around again, the voice sounded too real for it to just be his imagination. He scanned in front of him until he found an unnatural shimmer. He focused on the shimmer and traced it out until it came out in the outline of a boy. He trailed his eyes across the outline watching the boy standing on top of the water with wide eyes. 

    “Holy shit…” Mark said without meaning to. 

    “Holy shit,” the figure replied in agreement. 

    “Are- are you a ghost?” Mark asked the figure, watching as the figure rolled its eyes at him. 

    “Are you a ghost?” It shot back.

    Mark was speechless as he reached up slowly pulling the hood to his cloak off his head to see the figure better. He paced around the beach running his fingers through his hair in astonishment, “This is amazing,” he mumbled. 

    “Amazing,” it replied, seeming to agree. 

    Mark turned back to the figure and was going to say something else when someone shouted his name from the forest, “MARK!” Mark knew that voice, he had been looking for it and he flinched at the thought. 

    “Mark?” The thing asked him.

    Mark shrugged, "That's me. I have to go now I'll be back later. It was nice to meet you..." He trailed off hoping to get the things name.

    "It was nice to meet you,” it replied curtly. 

    Mark ran another hand through his hair, “"Okay then. I'll see you." And then he was leaving. He had to reach him before he left again. 

    “Mark!” The voice shouted again. 

    “Jeno?!” Mark called back looking frantically for his friend. 

    “Mark!” He heard Jeno reply before a large figure ran into him. Mark whipped around to yell at whoever it was only to come face to face with Jeno, whose eyes widened when he saw him. 

    “Mark! Oh, thank goodness I found you I’ve been so worried…” Jeno began to say quickly. 

    “You absolute brat how can you say that,” Mark interrupted, “Renjun and I have been a mess since you disappeared, where did you even go?!”

    “Shhhh,” Jeno hushed putting his hands on Mark’s arms to calm him, “I’ll show you but please calm down. I need you to trust me.”

    Mark took a shaky breath and nodded, “You better have an amazing explanation,”

    “I do, I promise, listen I was gone because I got my wings back,” Jeno said calmly.

    “You what?!” Mark shouted.

    Jeno chucked and turned around pulling part of his shirt up. Where his wounds used to be there was nothing except smooth skin. Mark brushed his fingers against where they used to be and inhaled sharply. “How- what- why?”

    Jeno chuckled again turning to face him, “I saved your life without a second thought and was willing to give myself for you. Apparently, they saw it as worthy and gave me back my wings, and gave me a new person to look over.”

    “Who is it?” Mark asked excitedly, happy to have Jeno back. 

    Jeno smiled at him, “It's you.”

    “Me?” Mark asked surprised. Jeno was his guardian angel?

    Jeno nodded happily, “Yep. I do have to explain a couple things to you, part of my deal was to tell you why I lost my wings and see if you’ll still accept me after.”

    Mark knit his eyebrows and nodded thinking back to the boy on the cliff. Jeno took a deep breath, “I know you saw Johnny when you touched my wounds,” Mark nodded, “Johnny was the last person I was supposed to guard but as you saw I failed. Before Johnny, there were two others I failed to protect, Doyoung and Ten, both of which had a similar fate to Johnny. Due to the fact I failed to protect and save them, I was booted.”

    Jeno looked at him shyly a hint of pain in his voice as he continued to explain, while Mark listened patiently. Once he finished Mark simply nodded. “I still trust you Jeno. I believe you’ll protect me.” Jeno smiled at him as a small shrill voice rang out. 

    “Jeno!” Renjun screamed and barreled into Jeno knocking him to the ground. 

    Jeno laughed loudly and tightly wrapped his arms around the tiny boy's waist, “Renjun, I missed.”

    Renjun hit his chest lightly and giggled, “I missed you to dummy, where were you?”

    Jeno giggled and poked Renjun’s nose while Mark stood there smiling. Jeno was back, now the only thing he had to figure out was the lake figure. Which was why he found himself walking away from said lake figure a week later. 

    “See you,” Mark said to the lake figure after visiting a second time.     

    “See you later,” it called out after Mark as he walked away skipping slightly. He began his trot back to the cave where Jeno and Renjun were waiting for him a smile still on his face. He couldn’t wait to figure out what the thing on the lake was. 

    As he approached he felt a looming presence over him. His eyes became bleary and he staggered a moment whispers filling his head saying unintelligible things. He whimpered slightly bringing a hand to his head and breathing heavily. 

    The whispers continued to get louder and louder until a pair of tan arms wrapped around Mark’s waist from behind making him jump and shriek. Mark whipped around to find a boy a little smaller than him standing and grinning. “Hey hey hey Mark,” the boy said grinning. 

    “Mark?” Another voice said behind him. Mark turned as he watched Jeno rush out of the cave to him Renjun following right behind him. “Are you okay? What happened? Who’s this? Did he hurt you?” Jeno said glaring at the boy and checking over Mark for any injuries. 

    Mark shook his head getting rid of the last of the whispers and took a shaky breath, “I’m fine Jeno, just startled.”

    Jeno released a sigh of relief and turned his full attention to the tan boy in front of them, “Who are you?”

    The tan boy huffed and turned to Mark, “Come on Mark you remember me, we were just talking a moment ago.”

    Mark took a longer look at him until he met his blue-green eyes before his own eyes widened, “You're- your're-,”

    The tan boy bowed, “Its a pleasure to meet you properly Mark, my name is Haechan, or as you know me, the magic lake spirit thing, which I am not I am a naiad there's a difference.”

    Mark’s eyes continued to get wide as Haechan spoke. “How are you- what happened?”

    Haechan giggled which made Mark’s heart speed up just a little, “I would like to personally thank you for breaking my curse. I can now speak and walk on land again and it’s all thanks to you.”

    Mark and Jeno just stared at him blankly as Renjun’s voice rang out, “Hi Haechan! I’m Renjun, I’m a deer hybrid!”

    Haechan took a step back as Renjun run up to him and hugged him tightly causing Jeno to stiffen. Haechan wrapped his arms around Renjun in a hug and looked at Mark putting a hand to his chest, ‘so precious’ he mouthed, which Mark had to agree with. 

    Giggling came out of Renjun’s mouth as he moved out of Haechan’s embrace and ran up to Jeno, “Jeno look I made a new friend!”

    Jeno couldn’t help but smile happily as he looked down at Renjun, “I see, I’m so happy for you.”

Renjun giggled again and ran off to look at a flower that caught his attention. 

    “So,” Harchan clapped his hands, “I haven’t been able to speak for hundreds of thousands of years, let me tell you about the 16th century.”

[fanficsofmine]

Tonight - Junmyeon Smut

We had been lacking in some Junmyeon smut lately, so enjoy! -T

“I’ll be right back,” I laughed as my friends’ shouts of protest followed me. We had all come out to watch a cover band at a bar called The Tin Roof here in San Diego. I had decided that I desperately needed some fresh air from dancing, drinking, and singing along with 90′s cover songs.

We had flowing into California for an EXO concert. It was not until tomorrow, but we had decided to make a girls’ trip out of the ordeal. We had been at the beach for the past two days, hitting various California tourist towns before we had to be back in LA tomorrow for the actual day of the show.

I stumbled out onto the patio of the par. It was, surprisingly, drastically quieter with the door shut. I leaned against the railing to steady myself. One too many rounds of tequila shots flowed through my veins.

“Are you alright,” a voice from beside me appeared. I jumped slightly. I had not even taken notice that somebody else was outside with me.

“Oh! You scared me!” I giggled and turned to see the source of the voice. My heart jumped into my throat when my drunken, blurred vision focused on Kim Junmyeon standing next to me.

He smiled his gorgeous smile.

“I didn’t mean to frighten you. I just noticed you as you came outside.” His English had improved greatly since their last show here. It was easy to tell that he had been working on it enough to be practically fluent.

“No! You are totally okay. I’m sorry for stumbling into your space,” nerves shook my voice. I wanted to maintain my composure, and the alcohol was fighting against me to do so. It was making me want to embarrass the hell out of myself.

He smiled again, “if i’m going ot come out to a bar, I can’t expect to keep the whole place to myself, can I?”

I chuckled and shook my head, which proved to be a mistake. The world around me took the tiny motion and spun it like a hula hoop. I grasped at the railing again, and then felt Junmyeon’s hands land on my waist.

“Here. Sit down. I’ll go get you water.”

Before I could resond, he had me on one of the metal chairs and was gone.

I paced my breathing. I did not expect him to actually return. Why would he take care of a drunk girl at a bar? I was not his problem. I rested my elbows on my knees and my forehead on my palms. I stared at the concrete. Focusing on one spot helped the spinning to cease. I took deep breaths in through my nose and out through my mouth.

I was surprised to see a pair of sneakers invade my eyes’ anchor on the ground. I slowly raised my head, making sure not to move too quickly.

Junmyeon was standing in front of me with a plastic cup of water from the bar. He handed it to me before moving the nearest chair closer to me.

I blushed and thanked him. I took a long sip to help me regain my composure. 

I was in awe. He was as kind as he had always presented himself. A look of genuine concern furrowed his brow. His hands were folded in his lap. I took the moment of silence to fully take him in. He was painfully handsome. The kind of handsome that you could stare at for hours and hope that he did not find it creepy. His hair was pushed back in my favorite way. It suited him well. He was in a simple outfit of jeans and a t-shirt with a flannel over it. His eyes were gentle as they scanned my features as well. 

 "Are you alright,“ he asked, cocking his head to one side. 

“I really do feel a lot better,” I assured him, “I think that it all hit me at once. But I’m okay.” He seemed to accept that answer and leaned back in his chair, a bit more at ease. 

 "I’m so sorry, I’ve been rude. My name is (Y/N).“ I stuck my hand out and he shook it. 

 "And I’m Suho.“ 

 It happened suddenly. The absolute fangirl in me slid past the dam, riding on a wave of liquor. 

 "I thought you preferred being called Junmyeon? Didn’t I read that once?” Immediately my hand covered my face. A confused look crossed his face. 

 "You know who I am?“ There was no point in hiding it anymore. My cover had been blown. I didn’t even bother with words, but just nodded my head. I anticipated that he would leave me be, at risk of me being some sort of sasaeng. Instead, he just let the corner of his mouth twitch up. 

“I do prefer Junmyeon. Most people find it easier to just call me Suho." 

 "I want to call you what you want to be called.” That caught him off guard more than me recognizing him seemed to. 

 "Well, thank you.“ He leaned forward on his elbows and put his upper body closer to me. His body language was screaming at me, even if he was staying collected. My heart began to race. 

 "So, what has you sitting outside at a bar in San Diego?” I did not want the conversation to turn awkward. I did not want him to decide to leave suddenly.

 "Some of the other guys wanted to go out,“ he pointed through the glass door, and I noticed Sehun and Chanyeol watching the band from the back of the room, "but, when you’re the leader, even outside of the stage or events, you get stuck being the responsible one. Especially when you really don’t drink all that much.

"I’m much more sober than they are. It’s a little bit frustrating." 

 I felt slightly disappointed in myself for being as drunk as I was. 

 "Well, I’m sorry you ended up taking care of a total stranger when you already had to take care of your friends…” but he cut me off. 

 "Believe me, I would much rather take care of you. You’re better to look at than they are.“ He winked at me, and my face flushed again. 

 "Your English is really good,” I quickly changed the subject. I was attempting to not slur my words or stutter. 

 "I love California. I wanted to learn it so I could stay out here more.“ 

 "Well, color me impressed,” I grinned. I could feel myself sobering up a bit. The cool air and the water I was drinking provided for bit of a clear head. I did, however, still feel a bit daring from my drinks. 

 "Do you wanna do something a bit un-leader like?“ He squinted his eyes in a teasing, suspicious manner. 

 "Are you going to kidnap me,” he joked. I laughed out loud and responded, “maybe. Let’s go get breakfast. What do you say? We’ll text our friends that we are okay, but let’s escape for a bit." 

 "It’s 1:30 in the morning!” He seemed confused by my suggestion. 

 "You’ve never had pancakes in the middle of the night?! Surely that’s not just an American thing.“ 

 He bit his lower lip nervously. I watched him grow cautious as he looked back inside at his friends. I caught glimpses of my friends as well. I knew that they would kill me for this, but I was not going to let this opportunity pass. 

 "Okay. Let’s go!” He suddenly jumped up and reached his hand out to me. I laughed as he took my hand and we bolted out of the gate that was on the patio. We ran a few blocks up and I requested an Uber. As we waited, we both took the time to Text our respective parties. 

 "Here. Because they’ll never believe me if I tell them who I’m with. I don’t want them sending a search party.“ I turned my phone and opened Snapchat on selfie mode. Junmyeon surprised me by pulling me close to him. His arm rested on my hips as he took the phone from me, his arms longer and able to get a better angle. 

 I was hyper aware of Junmyeons palm resting on the exposed skin where my shirt had slightly raised up. I felt his fingers tighten slightly on the top of my jeans as he turned me to rest against him. 

 We took several selfies, sending each one to my friends, repeating the action with his phone to Chanyeol and Sehun. My phone immediately started to explode with text messages and phone calls. 

 Junmyeon laughed as he showed me his screen. He translated it from the Korean it was in. 

 Receive Text Message: We can’t even be mad at you for bailing on us , Junmyeon hyung. She’s beautiful! We’ll see you back at the hotel. 

 Our uber arrived and we slid into the backseat. We made small talk with our diver as he escorted us to the nearest IHOP. 

 While our driver was elaborating on a story of his craziest pick up, I felt a graze across the top of my hand that was resting on the seat. I glanced down to see Junmyeon’s hand tracing shapes into mine. He was not looking at me, but almost doing it absentmindedly. He began telling our driver stories of Korea and other places that he has travelled. My heart was skipping beats erratically.

 Finally, he glanced at me, as though to make sure that he had my approval. When I simply smiled back, he took the invitation and laced his fingers through mine. My mind was traveling in hundreds of different directions. I was not sure that this was my real life. Had I fallen asleep at the hotel? Was I going to wake up disappointed? 

 The pressure of Junmyeon squeezing my fingers with his brought me back to the reality of my situation. I was sitting in the back seat of a car with Kim Junmyeon. He was holding my hand. And he was smiling his stunning smile straight at me. 

 I made a mental note to be sure to thank the universe for aligning properly for this later. 

 We arrived at IHOP and thanked our driver.  We went inside and had a fantastic time. We laughed and conversed as though we had known each other for years. I was comfortable with Junmyeon. It was a nice feeling. 

 When we caught another ride back to my rental car, we held hands again. You would have thought that we had been together for years. 

 My friends had gotten a ride back to the hotel, so I offered to drive Junmyeon back to his since I had sobered up substantially. He thanked me and opened my driver side door for me. The ride was fun. He asked who would pop up on my Spotify, making notes in his phone each time that he heard a particular artist or band that he liked. 

 We got to his hotel, and he asked me to park the car around the back instead of just dropping him off at the entrance. Word had gotten around that EXO were staying here, so he wanted to slide in through one of the back doors. There were groups of girls hovered around the front doors, and he wanted to avoid them if possible.

 I parked near the back of the lot. I avoided any streetlights that illuminated certain spots. I took the key out of the ignition and allowed our vehicle to disappear into darkness. 

 It was nearing 4 am. I knew that he needed to sleep. I did not want to be the cause of Junmyeon being tired during his show the next day. However, I also did not want to miss any opportunity to spend another minute with him. 

"Thanks for kidnapping me,” he said with a smirk. I chuckled and turned to him.  

“Any time that you need kidnapping, you let me know. I’d be happy to hold you hostage for a while again.” There was a brief pause between us. Our eyes held onto each other. I held my breath, dreading the action of him reaching for the car door handle. 

 Instead, his hands flew forward and tangled into my hair. His lips aggressively slammed into mine. There was a hunger behind his kiss. A desire that I had never felt behind a kiss before. His tongue slid past my parted lips and we spent the next several minutes unwilling to break apart. 

 Finally, he pulled away. His thumb traced along my bottom lip. I wasn’t sure what took over me, but I was unable to resist lightly nibbling on it between my teeth. Junmyeon moaned slightly at this, and leaned forward to kiss me again.

 "We all have our own rooms, you know,“ he whispered against my lips. 

 "Then why the fuck are we doing this in a rental car,” I quipped back. 

 This time, him reaching for the door was not a cause for concern, but a source of excitement. He circled around the hood of the car and opened my door for me. With a different sense of urgency than when he dragged me away from the bar, he guided me into the hotel. 

 We got to the elevator and, the second that the doors shut, I was slammed against the wall. He hiked my leg up around his waist, and I felt his cock growing hard against my clothed core. I groaned against his kiss, desire causing me to grow more wet each passing moment. 

 His lips traveled along my cheek and to my jawline. His teeth bit at my neck. I felt the skin underneath start to bruise as he sucked and nibbled to mark his territory. His hands slid underneath my shirt. He pawed at my breasts and his lips continued to travel across my throat. 

 "You’re so fucking sexy,“ he whispered, "I wanted to touch you the moment that my eyes landed on you at the bar.” A ding filled my ears as the elevator arrived on Junmyeon’s floor. Instead of letting me walk this time, Junmyeon lifted me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist and he carried me down the hallway. Thankful that it was the middle of the night, I was able to feel no embarrassment at how much PDA we were showing. 

 Skillfully, he slid his room key out of his pocket and unlocked the door, all while holding me up as though I was a feather. He opened the door, and then used my back to shut it. I was leaned down, kissing him as though I was never going to be able to kiss another person again. 

Holding me against the door, his hand slid up my shirt. He tugged at the top of my bra.

“I can’t wait to get you out of these clothes,” he whispered as he spun me around and laid me down on the bed. He undid my jeans and slid them off of my legs.  I helped him out by removing my shirt as he undressed himself.

Junmyeon was an exquisite site. His body was still cut with stunning abs. His hair was disheveled, giving him a sexy aura. We sat, unmoving, for just a moment. We stared at each other.

I began to feel self conscious, and wrapped my hands around my body. Before I was unable to even fully cover myself, though, Junmyeon’s hands had mine pinned down to the bed.

"Don’t do it, baby girl. Don’t you dare take away the beautiful sight before me.”

His lips found my neck again. He began kissing down my figure. He pulled the straps down on my bra, and then the cups, exposing my breasts. A moan of satisfaction at the sight of them escaped his lips before he attached them to one. The other nipple being rolled through his thumb and forefinger.

“Oh, Junmyeon,” I seductively whispered, “that feels so good.”

His mouth popped off of my nipple and a devilish smile crossed his face.

“You said that you wanted to call me whatever I wanted to be called right?”

Before I could properly respond, he told me, “well, what if I want you to call me, ‘daddy?’”

“Like I said, I’ll call you whatever you want me to call you, Daddy.”

The words falling out of my mouth had an effect on both of us. I could tell it fueled him as much as it was feeding my desire as well.

A low growl left him as he traveled all of the way down my body. He slid my panties off; immediately attaching his mouth to my core. My back arched at his sudden assault. My body was shaking from the immense amount of pleasure coursing through it. I grabbed a fistful of his hair and pulled him further onto me.

“Fuck, Junmyeon. That feels fucking incredible.” I was so lost in enjoying myself, that I had not noticed that I had failed to call him by his requested name.

As quickly as he started, he removed his mouth from me.

“What did you call me, princess?” A stern look furrowed his brow.

I immediately apologized, “I’m so sorry Daddy. Please keep making me feel good? Please!”

He smirked.

"I do like hearing you beg for me. But I’m going to have to spank you for not obeying my request.”

His words alone were enough to cause my wetness to increase. I licked my lips as he positioned himself on the edge of the bed. He curled a finger at me, and I whimpered slightly as I crawled over to him. I placed myself over his lap. His hand rubbed a spot on my ass before he slapped it, hard.

I bit my lip to resist the urge to moan out. Spanking was one of my favorite things. But I was being punished. I couldn’t let on that I was enjoying myself, or he may stop.

A few swats later, Junmyeon surprised me by sliding a finger inside of me instead of placing a slap on my bottom.

“You’re practically dripping for me. What a naughty girl you are, kitten. Who knew that you liked Daddy’s punishment so much?”

He grabbed me by the hair and adjusted me so my face was level with his.

“Hands and knees. Now.”

“Yes, Daddy.”

I bent over and rested on my elbows with my ass in the air. Junmyeon ran his hand down my arched back and back up to my butt.

“You are so damn sexy,” he told me before sliding into me. I cried out slightly and let myself adjust to his length fully.

“Oh my god. You feel so good inside of me, Daddy.” He took that as his cue to start thrusting into me. His finger tips dug into my hips as he fucked into me aggressively. There was no mercy or hesitation behind his motions. His thrusts were intense and I was coming undone quickly.

“Daddy… I’m not… I’m not going to…”

“Cum. Cum right now, baby girl.” His thrusts began to waver from their rhythm. I knew that he was going to release at the same time as me. Knowing that I made him feel that good sent me over the edge. I tightened around him and a heat knotted and immediately unraveled in my stomach. I came hard, screaming “Daddy” out over and over.

He pushed into me a few more times as we rode out our highs. I collapsed on the bed once he pulled out, exhausted. I saw the alarm clock that the hotel room provided and saw that it was almost five in the morning.

“What time do you have to be anywhere tomorrow?”

“Don’t worry about that, babe. I just want to hold you. I don’t get to do this. I want to just enjoy somebody’s company. Please?”

I snuggled into his chest, no longer concerned about anything but being there with Kim Junmyeon.

[chickenstab]

Will you tell us more about your OCs? What are their stories?

i’m pissed off and grumpy and i’m gonna make this 10000x longer than it needs to be specifically to piss off the anon that wanted me to stop sharing my art of my characters so here goes

This guy’s name is Teddy. He’s the nicest person you’ll ever meet. He likes puppies and space and snuggling. 

When he was 15, he moved from Chile to the US, where he and his family now reside. However, upon turning 18, he has since moved out to a town over. He still keeps in contact with his parents nearly every day, and he loves them plenty. His parents worked very hard to be able to afford those arms of his. He didn’t want to burden them any further, so as soon as he got them at the age of 17, he immediately started working towards living on his own.

He’s a very hard and committed worker. He has tried very hard to become fluent in English since he’s moved to the US. Spanish is his first language! Living in a small secluded area meant he never had the need to learn English as a second language early on, so it’s still a struggle for him sometimes. But look at him now! 21 and fluent.

Also, remember when I mentioned his arms? Do you see?? have you noticed???? he has robot arms. Wow! This is because he does not have real arms. Not anymore, at least. He lost them when he was 12. Unfortunately for Teddy, the touchy and contact heavy person that he is, he cannot feel with his robotic arms. So he’s a very sad man. In fact, he’s very hesitant to touch things at all, even if he cannot feel what he may want to touch.

He’s not allowed to touch the dogs at work. He works at an animal shelter, doing heavy lifting in the back. He can lift a lot of things because of his arms! Such a strong boy! But in turn, he needs to keep his body mass up to support the weight and constant stress of his arms. So he’s got a nice bod. Whoever he’s dating must feel very lucky.

This is Hazel. He’s feels very lucky, because he’s dating Teddy. However, every other aspect of his life he’s not as keen on. He’s a very grumpy man.

Hazel is not 100% my own character. He was created by my friend. This does not mean I love him any less. If anything, I probably draw him the most. He probably wouldn’t like that fact if he knew it, though. Because he’s, as previously stated, a grouch. He gets into fights, he hates most of the people he lives with, and he’s known to seclude himself from time to time. To most people, he might seem like an elusive asshole.

But, this doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a nice side. Aside from being a bit rowdy, he’s a rather caring person underneath. So long as he cares for you, he will turn out to be a rather attentive listener, and will fight on your behalf. He’s not a very good fighter, for as many fights as he gets into, so let’s hope that doesn’t happen. 

Speaking of fighting, and just in general being rather bad at it– He’s a man to worry about! Always coming home with a black eye or a broken nose. Who wouldn’t want to care about him? I certainly would!

While not as much of a softy as his boyfriend, he is probably the most physically softest boy around. Look at him! Such fluffy hair! Such poofy clothes! And his skin??? oh, BABY BUTT SOFT! Such a pleasant man to look at. (Just don’t stare for too long, because he’ll probably punch you)

This lovely man’s name is Harley. He’s tall and doesn’t say much, and he’s always coughing for some reason. He’s also quite the memer.

He doesn’t have much to do with the other two, other than the fact that he lives under the same roof as them. He lives in a house with five other people! Wow! That’s a lot! While in his own home, he’s well known, he’s probably not seen too often. Moreso because he tends to be very quiet. But boy, when he’s around, it’s hard not to see him! Long limbs and a flowing red scarf? Hard to miss, for sure.

While his sense of fashion is questionable to say the least, his sense of humor is even more so one to remember. While deadpan and stoic, he’ll deliver the dankest, absolutely moisture promoting memes that’ll ever pass through your ears. If you need to know the latest meme, he’s your guy.

And obviously his library of memes have attracted quite the crowd. Everybody’s dropping their pants for this guy, for reasons unbeknownst to me past the fact that he’s the meme king. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was bangin’ someone in the house right now. (spoiler: he is and she’s a total babe, and sucker for his memes.)

This is not the total babe that’s banging Harley.. Sorry to get your hopes up. However, she is a babe on her own, and her name is Candy. She’s sweet and energetic, and she believes in you.

She’s a close friend of Teddy’s, and even works the same place and job as him! Though lacking in the robotic strength department, she’s stout and has a lot more muscle than you might think. So don’t worry, she’s qualified for the job. She, again like Teddy, is a lover of dogs and animals in general.

She’s not part of the same household, but she’s lived in the same town all of her life, and she even got her own dog from the shelter!

Her dog’s name is Noodle. Yes, she’s getting a spot on this because Noodle is very important. She’s a beagle and she likes eating cardboard boxes. She is the most important character in this universe.

This is Nova. She’s 4′9 and 18 years old. She’s often mistaken for being twelve. Sometimes younger. But she takes that as a compliment! Everything’s a compliment to her. Criticism is always constructive in her mind.

She loves colorful things and drawing with her friends. Giggly and finds the most odd things fun and joyful, one might say she’s the epitome of an LOL so R4NDUM xD! girl. And she probably is. But she finds comfort in the things she likes and does, so nobody judges her on it. In fact, all of her friends celebrate such a feat! All of her friends are a little bit out there, and they all love each other.

She, like Candy, does not live under the same roof as the first three. It seems like the other three who live under that household will forever be a mystery.

Speaking of mysteries– Nova loves a good mystery! Catch her and her friends inspecting rocks on the ground in search of a crumbling forgotten tomb of the undead. She’d never go inside it, but she’d love to take pictures of it to share with others! She thinks of herself as an adventurer, even if she doesn’t like putting herself in danger. She believes that you don’t need to be in harms way to have fun and explore!

This gal’s name is Salmon. She’s loud and rambunctious, and if you look into a body of water long enough, she’ll emerge from it wresting a fish no doubt.

She’s hard of hearing, but spending a majority of her time in and underwater, she forgets that she ever is. And when she’s not, she’ll be sure to let you know to speak up. Aggressively so. She’s just an aggressive person in general.

Unlike Nova, Salmon is the definition of danger. She’s feisty and loves exploring, and she’ll be the first of your friends to fight a large fish for dominance. She’ll probably win, too.

She’s not really purely friends with one or two people. She’s always just sort of around whether you know her personally or not. Catch her a state away showing a leg on the side of the road to get back home. She knows she’s a sizzling masterpiece and she’ll use that to her advantage to get back home. It’s happened more than once.

Who the fuck is this??? I don’t know! He doesn’t even have a name but I liked how I drew him so I made a post with a picture of him in it. So now I’m going to give him an entire character and personality just out of spite.

His name is Leaf and he’s another one of Teddy’s friends. He enjoys wearing banana suits atop windy roofs of 10 story apartments. Why? For the thrill.

He’s never worn the same outfit twice. Or at least nobody’s ever seen it. He frequents the town’s beloved Super Sally’s Salad Bar, not for the salads but for the delicious other-food they serve. Turns out a salad bar has a lot more in it than plants. I guess it’s like IHOP but even though pancake is in the name, they serve a hell of a lot more than just pancakes.

He’s a food lover, and he always has a snack in his pocket. Whether or not he’ll share with you depends on just how much you’ll do for the sake of a snack. So long as your willing to kill a man, you’re in the clear for his pocket granola.

He’s also the cool friend. Even though he doesn’t seem to work a job that pays much, he always seems to have a lot more money than you’d expect. He’s always getting obscurely neat gifts for his pals. It’s suspicious, but nobody seems to be complaining. Instead everybody is only slightly skeptical of his means.

This is the only picture of him I’ve ever drawn.

If I didn’t have a baby chick shitting on my lap right now I’d be inclined to include even more OCs that I didn’t post yet, but I’ll leave this for all of you guys thank u nd goodnight,. fuck u whoever told me to stop talking about my ocs also.

[rosyredlipstick]

funny valentine

Mitchell is totally and completely ready for whatever Connor Stoll has planned for this Valentine's Day. He has a bag packed. He's planned for this. He's ready. - 

Or, in the total turn of events that shocks no one, Mitchell totally, completely really isn't.

Quick Note: There are small, quick references to earlier fics in my Conchell series. They're not required to read this fic, but a few things might make more sense :) You can find said fics at my ao3 page.

My funny valentine, sweet comic valentine

You make me smile with my heart Your looks are laughable, unphotographable But you're my favorite work of art Is your figure less than greek? Is your mouth a little weak?

“I’m ready.”

Sebastian stilled, his hands hovering over the dashboard, gave him a look. “To go to school? Good job?”

Mitchell pulled his worn duffel bag into his lap, staring ahead determinedly. “It’s Valentine’s Day.”

Sebastian went back to starting up the car, not looking up as he messed with with the heater. “Should I congratulate you on finally learning how to read a calendar or?”

Mitchell huffed out, the action overwhelmed by Sebastian finally getting the heater up and running. It was Sebastian’s turn to drive their crappy shared car, so there was really no guarantee they would even end up at school. A shady dive bar, maybe, a cheap fast food place, probably.

“I know you’re probably in on whatever scheme Connor is planning, so I’m just letting you know – I’m ready.”

Seb cocked his head to the side, “What are you talking about?”

Mitchell remained firm. “It’s Valentine’s Day. Connor’s going to try something, I know it.”

Seb nodded slowly. “Um, okay? Isn’t he in New York?”

Mitchell shook his head, “He should be on his way here now, if his plan goes accordingly.”

Seb clicked his tongue. “Well, okay. That’s a bit ridiculous, but ok-ay.”

Mitchell shrugged. It was Valentine’s Day. Last month, Connor flew over because the Harry Potter Marathon was on TV and apparently Travis “was more of a Lord of the Rings kind of guy and therefore does not deserve to bask in Harry’s heroic journey”.

So, Valentine’s Day?

Connor was going to be here. Mitchell knew it.

Seb nodded with all seriousness. “Well, since you’re apparently being stolen away for the weekend, I think that deserved celebration. Breakfast it is!” He declared, violently turning into the nearest IHOP.

“Sebastian. No!”

Mitchell fell against the row of lockers, dropping the bag to the floor dramatically.

“Going somewhere?” Naomi asked without looking up, only flipping onto another flashcard.

Mitchell gestured a bit widely to the duffel he had at his side. “I’m ready this time.”

She cocked her head to the side, the only clue he had that she was listening in. He continued to explain.

“Connor loves big, extravagant shows of his love. So, knowing this, I guessed that he would want to pull something on Valentine’s Day. So I packed some clothes, my tooth brush, and a few emergency fire starters. You, know – the usual.”

Naomi stared at him. “You guys have the oddest relationship.” She remarked. “Where did you meet again?”

“Camp.” He told her quickly, moving on. “But the only thing I’ve gotten from him all day was a text promising me we’ll video chat later tonight! It’s almost the end of the day and – nothing!” He bit his lip, “He’s usually here in the morning.”

She shrugged, “Maybe he just got busy. Maybe wherever he is, they have a Mr. Camden as well, bend on ruining their lives through testing and pop quizzes.”

Mitchell sighed, a small seed of disappointment blooming in his chest. “Yeah. Probably.”

School was school.

Everything went the same.

“Hey good-lookin’.” Connor grinned from the screen, “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

Mitchell immediately melted, holding his phone closer to his face. Any drop of disappointment in him immediately faded at the sight of those dimples, surrounded by those curls. “Hey, sweetheart. How was your day?”

Connor immediately launched into the elaborate prank Katie was planning on pulling on Travis later that night, simultaneously swearing Mitchell to secrecy and demanding Mitchell somehow post the entire thing on YouTube when he sends it to him later tonight. Mitchell was just laughing his way through one of the finer details of Katie’s plan when there was a knock on his doorframe.

Sebastian peeked around the corner. “If you aren’t in at least second-base with your sexting I’ll be sourly disappointed.”

“We’re video chatting.” Mitchell corrected.

“Even better. Are his pants off yet?”

Mitchell groaned, ignoring Connor’s charming laughter coming from the speakers. “Go away Seb!” He threw a pillow at him, scowling and feeling a little shot of victory when it hit his face.

He held up his hands in surrender. “Pizza’s here and parents are getting ready to leave, thought you might wanna know, I’m gonna jump in the shower.”

“Don’t you have a date? Like, in ten minutes?” Mitchell asked, unimpressed.

Sebastian winked at him, “Who says I can’t multitask?”

Mitchell groaned, resisting the urge to throw his last pillow because, well, he liked that pillow. “Get out of my room.” He ordered, a bit pleased with the laughter still echoing out of his phone.

“Sorry bout that, darlin. Where were we?”

The next morning, Mitchell woke up half folded over desk, drooling onto his Trig textbook, and next to a completely blank phone.

Mitchell cursed under his breath later that morning, still angry that himself. “I forgot to charge my phone last night.” He complained, buckling himself in. “I must have fallen asleep Skyping Connor and it died in the middle of the night.”

Seb burst out laughing, which, um, it wasn’t that funny. Even if Mitchell was complaining about petty stuff, Seb once went on a tangent about the absurdity of hot weather. In the summer. In California.

He was just pissed he couldn’t wear his leather jacket, but still. Petty, and not hilarious.

Mitchell gave him a suspicious look.

“Today’s the best day you could have done that.” Seb told him sarcastic, laughter still filling his voice.

Mitchell paused, his eyebrows coming together in confusion. “What do you mean? Are you planning something?” Mitchell turned to him, a glare in his eyes. “Are you planning on pulling the fire alarm again?”

Seb waved off his anger. “Nah, just – just it’s supposed to be a really boring day. Coulda used the entertainment.”

Mitchell frowned. He wanted to argue that that didn’t make any sense, but Hades, it’s not like the boy made much sense on a good day.

Mitchell shrugged it off, pocketing the dead phone. “Whatever.” He glanced up, catching the other boy just in time. “And no! No, we’re not getting breakfast the second day in the row, I can’t be late, no.”

Mitchell sniffed at his shirt, wrinkling his nose at the lingering scent of bacon oil that he spilled on his collar. Ugh. Great.

He had managed to talk Seb into leaving earlier enough that their pitstop didn’t completely screw his schedule up, instead forcing them to walk in with only minutes to spare before the first bell.

Mitchell was at his locker, organizing his textbooks in color order just how he liked it when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

Mitchell turned and was greeted by an unfamiliar sight – namely, a student that Mitchell didn’t’ recognize, holding onto a brown rectangular box.

“These are for you.” He told Mitchell, grinning nicely. He was a jock, Mitchell could observe from the varsity jacket on his shoulders. Baseball, probably, he could tell from his lean build.

Mitchell took them, a bit numb. He stared down at them, confused. “What?”

The jock only grinned sweetly. “Happy February 15th!”

Mitchell only blinked a few more times. “I’m totally flattered, but sorry.” He gave the boy an apologetic smile, attempting to pass back the box. It was a shame, they were caramel chocolate turtles - Mitchell’s favorite. “I have a boyfriend.”

His grin only widened, and he took a few steps back from Mitchell extended arm. “Right answer.” He told Mitchell, “Also, they’re from Connor.”

With that, nameless jock disappeared into the crowd, leaving Mitchell staring in bewilderment after him.

Okay…so what was that?

Right after second period, when Mitchell was able to thankfully stop at his locker and drop off the mysteriously gifted chocolates, still itching to whip out his phone and text Connor, a smiling cheerleader grabbed onto his wrist.

“Happy February 15th.” She told him, impossibly perky for the early hour of the morning. He stared on in shock as another uniform-clad girl strolled up to them, holding a large bouquet

“I love lilies.” He blinked in surprise as the girls placed the bundle in his arms, both wearing matching gleeful grins.

“They’re beautiful.” The second one gushed. She fumbled with her pocket for a second, pulling out a small slip of paper. “Connor says – awe omg – they’re as beautiful as you! That’s so sweet!”

He held the large bouquet with numb arms, vaguely wondering how the hell he was going to fit these in his locker.

The girls bounced away, still happily eyeing him as he stared down at the colorful bundle.

He heard the warning bell – only more minute till class – and swallowed. After rushing to his locker he carefully – carefully – bound up the flowers in his backpack, careful to not break off any of the delicate stems.

He shook his head, blinking, and forced himself to not think about it as he grabbed his Physics textbook and ran off.

How the Hades was he supposed to focus on gravitational potential?? What the Hades even was that?

Oh gods.

He left the Physics classroom, his mind not even a little bit clearer on what was going on, when he heard his name yelled. Not for the first time that day.

Two of the art girls – Naomi knew one of them, he was sure – were waiting outside his classroom, staring at him happily. “Hey Mitchell!” they greeted, waving. One of them had paint all up her arm, staining her sleeve and skin in equal amounts. They were holding matching Starbucks cups, their empty hands tangled together at their side.

Naomi’s-maybe-friend held out one of the cups. “Happy February 15th, Mitchell.” She grinned, tilting the cup towards him. “Caramel Macchiato with extra sugar. Connor says hello.”

Mitchell took the cup with a smile and a thank you, waving both girls off as they giggled after him.

He always complained how tired he was after Physics. It – it was something he often texted complaints about.

He sipped at the drink in his next class, thankful the teacher didn’t care, and credited the warm in his chest completely to the hot drink warming up his fingers.

Lunch couldn’t come quick enough.

Finally, alone with relatively sane friends at their everyday lunch table, he considered the situation.

Connor had somehow orchestrated an elaborate show of his love. Dating a Stoll, this was an obvious constant fact. Something Mitchell would probably never get used to, but it was expected.

But, Connor had somehow gotten into enough contact with his classmates and peers to orchestrate a large gift-giving campaign that Mitchell hadn’t even expected.

Mitchell had expected kidnapping. He expected Connor showing up without notification, probably with Hortencia and an already packed duffel bag in tow.

This?

Not even a little bit.

“Hey Mitchell.”  Fiona – in drama club, one of the ensemble girls that could be counted mostly normal – interrupted his thoughts as she slid in next to him. This was normal, they usually sat together with a few other of the theater and archery kids. It was an odd group, one that he wasn’t sure how formed, but he liked it nonetheless.

“Hey Fi.” Mitchell smiled in greeting, taking a bit of his cafeteria ravioli.

“So.” She started, her voice absolutely filled with glee. Mitchell froze a bit as she reached into her bag, her cheeks flush with happiness. “Happy February 15th.”

“Et tu, Brute?” He asked, his voice weak as she slid over a beautifully wrapped box.

“I’m a sucker for love.” She winked, the others coming to fill up the table, all eyeing him in barely concealed interest. She had probably told them, never one to keep a secret.

Mitchell sighed, plucking off the ribbon easily. He was pro at present wrapping. That had nothing to do with his current situation, no, but he was always a little proud of that fact.

“Cologne, nice.” She grinned, turning to her pocket mirror to mess with her glittery eyeshadow. Usually, Mitchell would be right beside her, offering pointers, but he turned back to the box instead.

His favorite brand, of course. Because it was Connor, so it could be nothing less than his absolute favorite. He traced the elaborate logo, wishing for nothing more than a fully charged phone battery.

“You hungry, Mitchell?” Andrew – on the archery team with him, almost as good as Mitchell himself when it came to the 70 meters rounds – asked, coming up to the table. He was one of Mitchell good mortal friends. At least, until now.

Because Andrew was now sliding a silver box across the table, and Mitchell could ever-so-clearly see Connor’s messy handwriting on the side.

“Happy February 15th, Mitchell.” Andrew told him innocently earnestly.

Mitchell took the box, the cologne box still in his lap, and sighed.

“Oooo chocolate covered strawberries. Yummy.” Fiona was apparently done with her makeup, leaning over to read the messy marker. “Adorable. I’ve never met Connor but I love him. Keep him forever, Mitch.”

Mitchell read the smeared marker again, running his thumb over it. He was a sap, and would probably be keeping the box forever. He allowed himself a small smile and resisted the urge to hug the presents to his chest. “That’s the plan.” He only answered, ignoring their cat-calls and jokes for the rest of lunch.

He dropped the gifts off in his locker, vaguely wondering if he would get away with stealing Seb’s phone charger he kept in his locker. He was carful with the gifts, careful not to smash or squish anything against the metal, and grabbed his Econ notebook quickly.

He didn’t receive anything for his last two classes, if you didn’t count the gift of ‘immense and complete boredom’ a gift. He rushed to his last class, grabbing all his supplies quickly.

His last class was boring – mostly notes off a powerpoint, something he could have printed off easily at home – and it didn’t help that his completely dead phone was burning a hole into his jeans, onto there to remind Mitchell how much he wanted to text demands for information. Or Skype. Skype was better.

He packed up his things quickly as the bell rang, already going through his head his after school plans. He liked to checklist his plans – have them all mentally laid out so he knew exactly what to do. He held his notebooks to his side, and paused right in the doorway.

Because despite the fact she should be currently leaving P.E. on the other side of the school, Naomi was waiting outside his classroom, cheerfully glee, with a golden wrapped present cradled in her hands.

He groaned. “Not you too.”

Her grin was wicked, “Connor says hi.” She only said, dropping the small package off in his arms. “I think it’s a watch, very fancy. Been having a nice day, sweetie?” She asked, her voice sickingly sweet.

Mitchell huffed, not really wanting to share the fact that his chest has been warm and pleased for the entirely of the day. “It’s been interesting.” He allowed her, angling up his chin.

She smiled, her red lipstick dark against her tan skin. “Good.” She in equal allowed him. She flipped the edge of her headscarf over her shoulder, still grinning as she wove her arms through his. “Happy February 15th, Mitchell.”

He laughed a bit, wondering if she knew about the tightly packed mountain of gifts in his locker. Or how Connor even pulled this off. Yeah, that was the question. Although, before he had the chance to ask, another body slid up to their joined figures, grinning widely and hugely.

“Hey Naomi.” Seb grinned at her, interest in her eyes, his voice as slick and dripping as olive oil.“How are things, my love?”

Naomi rolled her eyes, “No, Sebastian.”

He gave her a look of mock offense. “How dare you, I’ve done nothing –“

She ignored him, turning completely to face Mitchell. “I’ve got to go. Moms are picking me up right after school for dance.” Her grin was vicious, “Have a wonderful night.” She told him, pecking Mitchell on the cheek as she left, flipping Seb off.

“What, I don’t get one?” Seb grinned after her, immediately becoming distracted with another passing guy.

Mitchell huffed out a mostly amused breath. He actually really wanted to know how Connor pulled this off from New York.

Sebastian, wearing the most shit-eating grin Mitchell had ever seen, leaned against Mitchell’s locker as they arrived in his section, “Nice day, huh?”

Mitchell huffed, “You totally knew, didn’t you? I hate you. I hate you so much.”

Sebastian tsked, moving out of the way. “It’s your first Valentine’s Day. He’s still in puppy love.”

Mitchell threw up his hands, unable to hide the pleased grin that slid onto his face as he opened his locker. “We agreed no presents till Spring Break!”

“Did you really trust a Stoll Brother to keep their word?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.

Mitchell huffed, carefully pushing the gifts aside to get his textbooks out. He clicked at his phone, already knowing it was dead and useless but wanting to try anyways.

“Is he here?” Mitchell asked, the secret hope that had been lurking in the back of his mind all day.

“Sorry lover boy, looks like you’re gonna have to settle with the literal mountain of gifts to tide you over till Spring Break.” Seb gave him a sympathetic smile, mostly faux.

“And that reminds me…” Seb’s grin turned predatory as he flashed it on grinning passerby, “I’m not gonna be home till late.” Seb threw his keys over his shoulder, probably taking joy in how Mitchell had to stumble and trip in order to catch them. “Don’t wait up, I’ll take an Uber home.”

Mitchell sighed, “Will do.”

The giant plush teddy bear lovingly buckled into the passenger seat should not have been a surprise. Neither should have been Sebastian’s lovely note of February 15th wishes.

It took three trips from the car to get all the gifts in the house.

He laid out the gifts in the living room, itching to send a snapchat to his siblings, mostly to brag out how awesome his boyfriend was. What? It never hurt anyone to them of this fact. It was a simple, true fact – Mitchell had the best boyfriend in the world.

He managed to get a few minutes of battery from the car-charger, the little battery icon quickly dwindling and still an angry red. He’d plug his phone in, he decided, start dinner and Iris message while he waited for the phone to fully charge.

He was still glued to his barely charged phone as walked in his room backwards, his heavy backpack hanging off one shoulder. He dropped his bag to the floor as usual and flipped the lights on, spinning around just in time to have his hidden ankle blade already exposed and pointed out.

Mitchell froze as he took in the scene of his room, his hand still extended out with his knife.

“Nice reflexes.” Connor grinned at him, already sprawled shirtless out on Mitchell’s bed. “It’s good to have a man who can handle his own, ya know? Good job.”

He let out a heavy sigh of relief, instantly replaced by excitement. He dropped his phone and blade to the ground and dove forward, shrieking the other boy’s name as he did so.

Connor let out a puff of air as Mitchell fell on top of him, his hands coming up around Mitchell’s waist automatically. Mitchell immediately pulled him in for a kiss, the act fast and much dirtier than Mitchell initially intended. Connor pulled him in close, enjoying Mitchell’s weight against him as the other boy settled into a straddling position.

“Wait!” Mitchell pushed himself off the bed, ignoring Connor’s whine of protest. “You’re here!”

Connor gave him an obvious look. “I am. And I’m shirtless.” He gestured to himself to prove the point. “And we’re not making out, why?”

Mitchell pointed at him, “You gave me gifts! At school! From strangers!”

Connor gave him an amused look. “I know. I arranged everything. Facebook is a modern day godly gift, you know that right?” He stretched out, immediately drawing Mitchell to his shifting muscles. “Just saying, if you wanted to reward me with kisses, I totally would not protest. Like, at all.”

Mitchell thought of all the gifts currently laid out in his living room. “I get to give you my gift then.” He decided. “I thought we were waiting till Spring Break but I know with a Stoll I always have to be prepared.”

Connor sat up at that, wide-eyed. “You got me something?”

Mitchell turned, ruffling through one of his drawers. It was in here somewhere. “Of course Connor, don’t be silly.” He found the box quickly, and immediately blushed. He…forgot, exactly, what the gift giving would entail. Like sitting there as Connor opened it. That part.

“Nevermind, we can – we can do it later.” Mitchell tried to shove the box back into his clothes pile. Maybe, if he pounced at just the right angle and at just the right time, he could distract Connor long enough to push this moment out of his head.

Connor was already sitting up, his eyes excited. “No! Let’s do it now! Is it cool? I bet it’s cool. Katie got Travis a marshmallow shooter last Valentine’s Day, that was so cool.”

Mitchell bit his lip, his hand curled behind his back. “Well, uh, it’s not a marshmallow shooter. Or any type of shooter.”

Connor was still excited, “What is it?”

“It’s not cool or fun or anything, I just –“ Mitchell took a breath, stepping forward and dropping the box in Connor’s lap. “Here. Um. Happy February 15th.”

Connor froze a bit, probably realizing it was a fun or hugely spectacular gift he might have been expecting.

“It’s a ring.” Connor breathed out, his hands shaking a bit as he held the small silk box.

“It’s just like a ring, it’s not anything big, ya know? I just, I saw it in a magazine and it reminded me of you, and I just thought you’d like it. We can totally return it if like you want something different, that’s totally fine.” Mitchell rambled, his hands a tangled mess.

Connor took out the metal piece, placing the box to the side carefully. It was a nice band – and he managed to get the ring size from Travis without too many questions. It was nicely masculine, with a silver design and black inner band. He slid it onto his finger easily, moving his hand a bit to see it shine in the light.

Mitchell liked his lips, still awkwardly perched on the side of the bed.“So, um, do you like it?”

Connor, still staring at his finger, nodded. “I love it, Mitchell.” He turned to Mitchell, suddenly beaming. “Mitchell, I love it.”

Mitchell grinned, relief hitting him like a wave. “Really?” He asked,

Connor reached over, pulling Mitchell onto his chest in an easy movement. “I love it. It’s perfect.”

Mitchell laughed, resuming his previous position of straddling Connor’s hips. “Gods, that’s relieving.”

Connor leaned up, lip-locking Mitchell in such a dirty kiss, he would have blushed had he really considered the action. But he didn’t consider it; he fell into the intensity with equal eagerness, and returned the kiss with just as much tongue and heat.

He felt the ring dig into his hip as Connor clenched at him, and had to resist the urge to groan.

Mitchell pulled away, instead kissing himself down to the underside of Connor’s jaw, sucking and kissing a bright red mark into existence. Mitchell dragged his nails down Connor’s bare chest, enjoying how Connor’s chest was already starting to hitch under his hand. He sat up a bit, satisfied with his work.

“When are you parents coming home?” Connor breathed out, his lips shiny and pupils dilated.

Mitchell grinned, leaning in for a kiss. “Not till tomorrow. Valentine’s Day trip into the city. Seb’s not getting home till later tonight.”

Connor grinned, his hands coming up to rest in Mitchell’s hair. It was pink now – obnoxiously so, his siblings had told him in their latest Iris Message.

“We have time?” Connor asked, his hands coming down to Mitchell’s chest, and continued to lower and lower themselves.

Mitchell groaned, already reaching up to strip his shirt. He paused, the heat of the moment already starting to cloud his mind. He leaned down slowly, catching one of Connor’s hands. “Connor Stoll.” He smiled, his fingers catching on the cold metal of the ring. “I’ve always got time for you, darling.”

And the smile he got in return, well, that was just as enjoyable as what happened afterwards.

Notes:  Ahhh! A holiday fic in time for the holidays? CRAZY IKR? title & excerpt credited to the lovely Elvis Costello song 'My Funny Valentine' The ring is based on this design Thank you so so much for reading, my lovely Conchell fans. I really, really appreciate all the amazing support and reviews I've gotten from all of you - it really keeps me going! <3

[lalka-laski]

1. Do you take vitamins? If so, what kinds?: These days I’m taking B12 and Magnesium. I also take 1-2 scoops of collagen powder a day, if that counts. I’m hoping it’ll help my hair & nails grow longer and stronger, but time will tell. 2. What brand of eyeliner do you use?: I have several brands in my makeup collection right now. The one I used most recently was NYX. Though I don’t wear it much to begin with. My skin is too pale and my features are too soft to pull off heavier makeup. 

3. What’s your favorite flavor of Sun Chips?: I haven’t had them in years! I think I liked the French Onion?  4. Do you like Ugg boots?: They had their time & place.  5. How old were you when you first started taking surveys?: Much much younger than I am now. 

6. What color are your slippers?: A cute gray, pink & white plaid pattern 7. What’s your boy/girlfriend’s middle name?: Michael  8. Do you get your nails done?: Typically, but I’m trying to cut back. For the sake of my nail health AND my wallet...  9. Dream vacation?: Poland, Iceland or Ireland. My ideal vacations are more about exploring than just plopping down on the beach and relaxing.  10. What toppings do you like on your pizza?: Plain cheese (with white sauce) is my go-to. But I don’t mind some veggies now and then: artichoke, spinach, onions, broccoli...  11. How much was your prom dress? What’s the most you’d spend?: Both of them were ridiculously cheap. I’m a good bargain shopper.  12. Are you a gamer?: Not even slightly. I have embarrassingly bad hand-eye coordination and motor control, so operating anything with buttons or joysticks is no for me.  13. What shampoo do you use?: Matrix Biolage for color-treated hair and then Milkshake Silver Shine once a week to keep the brassiness away 14. Do you buy organic?: Sometimes  15. What kind of socks do you normally wear?: I typically hate socks (or anything else on my feet) but I recently bought a really cute set of Disney Princess socks that I love. It’s so fun to reach into my drawer in the morning and see who the “Princess of the day” is. (I am an adult, I swear...) 16. Are most of your friends single or taken?: Probably a balanced mix of the two 17. When you’re taking a survey that has a “Which of your friends is… the nicest? The prettiest? The smartest? Etc.” do you skip over it?: Probably  18. Last thing you bought on eBay? What about sold?: I actually just bought two lipcolors from Ebay. It was my first time ever using the site. 19. What day is your payday? Do you get paid weekly or bi-weekly?: Every other Wednesday  20. What salon do you go to for getting your hair done?: It’s called Beauty Bar 21. Do you drive?: Nope. 22. Where do you buy most of your lotions from?: I have to be careful because I have really sensitive skin that’s prone to dryness and itchiness. But that doesn’t stop me from stocking up on scented lotions from B&BW and Victoria’s Secret and places like that. I just love them too much!! 23. Do you keep a diary?: I’ve kept journals my entire life and in fact, usually have about 2-3 going at a time. I have ones for specific moods or situations and I don’t like to cross-contaminate ;)  24. Do you believe in luck?: I believe in privilege, which is essentially the non-metaphysical version of luck. Some people just have it easier than others and they always will.  25. Would you marry someone of a different religion?: I don’t prescribe to any organized religion but I’m very open and flexible to other’s beliefs. I dated a devout Muslim for 3 years and while his strict observance sometimes posed obstacles for us, it wasn’t what broke us in the end. But my current boyfriend/future husband doesn’t practice any religion, which makes things easier.  26. Would you convert for them?: 27. Worst part about your job?: The lack of structure/employee hierarchy bothers me. I wish I had a more defined role. Oh, and the 6 am shifts aren’t exactly my favorite...  28. Last thing you lost?: 8 FUCKING POUNDS! Thanks to intermittent fasting and a higher fat/lower carb diet. I’m LOVING it. 29. Ever took something out of the lost and found that wasn’t yours?: I don’t think so? 30. Do you delete friends from Facebook if they never talk to you?: I don’t really care that much 31. Did you go to IHOP’s free pancake day? If so, did you donate?: Why would I ever willingly go to an IHOP.  32. Worst job you ever had?: I’d have to say I’ve been pretty lucky with my jobs. Sure, my Starbucks days weren’t spectacular but they were pretty good as far as food service/retail jobs go.  33. What about best?: I guess my current job, since it’s the only full-time, benefits job I’ve ever had. For all intents and purposes, I do like it. And I can’t complain too much because I can sit here and fill out surveys for a good portion of every day...  34. Do you know what you want to do for the rest of your life?: Not a CLUE! I do know I don’t want to work here forever though.  35. Do you have a savings account? How often do you deposit money into it?: I have one, but there’s hardly anything significant in there. 

36. Do you smoke cigarettes?: Never 37. Do you know anyone who smokes cigars?: A lot of the men in my family smoke them on special occasions 38. How often do you wash your hair?: Every 2 days is my standard 39. Favorite kind of M&Ms?: Mini! Why do they taste so much better than the regular sized?  40. Do you worry a lot?: It’s my middle name 41. Favorite thing to order at your favorite restaurant?: I could never ever pick a favorite restaurant. Going out to eat is one of my favorite activities and I’m always trying new places!  42. Ugliest fashion trend at the moment?: I really had this whole athletic wear as formal attire thing.  43. Do you wear thongs?: Yes 44. When does school start/end for you?: I’m done! For now...  45. Do you like texting?: I much prefer it to talking over the phone. And I’ve been told by several people that my texting habits are uh, excessive.  46. What do you put in your coffee?: Just black! I like a little cream once in awhile, but I’ve been drinking it strictly black while I fast.  47. Do you like disco fries?: I don’t know what they are and I don’t care enough to Google it.  48. Do you like glittery nail polishes?: Only on an accent nail 49. Were you a good kid in high school?: I was a good student. I got mostly As and always did my work. I had my shithead moments but I never got into serious trouble.

[the-cat-and-her-spider]

Like I Loved You Version 2 6/7/18

Like I Loved You: Third Person POV      “Seems Like, You’ve Got It All Figured Out. You’re Alright With The Way This Is Going Down.”    The room is deathly quiet. Tensions between the two were mounting with each passing breath. His hands constantly roaming through his tousled hair. While she stood at the other end of the room, her hands balled into fists at her sides.  Neither one knew which step to take forever, but also didn’t want to take several steps back. Both have unshed tears and frustration in their eyes.  Finally, she throws her phone onto the bed between them. A picture of a woman with short red hair, glasses and chubby cheeks still plastered onto the front of it.  “So are we going to address the elephant in the room?” She says, steel like edge to her voice.  She looks at him from across the room. His face never changes, just a brief glance to the picture on her phone.  She takes one last lingering look at the man before her. Man may have been the wrong word for the way he was acting. But a man none the less is what he was supposed to be. She starts to tear up again as she looks at him. At the shoulder length honey blonde hair that she used to run her hands through. The dimples in his smile that made her knees weak. Looking into his hazel eyes now, she notices the love isn’t there. Not like how it used to be. This man in front of her, she doesn’t know him at all.  “What elephant in the room?” He asked stupidly. Without warning and faster than he had ever seen a woman travel, she flew across the room, grabbed her phone, and then stood in front of him just inches from his face.  For a brief moment he just looked at her. Taking in the fire burning in her eyes. Staring in wonder at the love still there underneath it all.  “This! This woman who you’ve let come between us! This bitch of a woman who you told me to apologize too! Which by the way, I shouldn’t have had too. I was only defending my relationship because I assumed she was some psycho. I have instincts you idiot! You honestly thought I couldn’t tell you were being distant? You honestly thought I wouldn’t notice that another woman was trying to move in on you? Little did I know that she had already fallen into your bed at that point. How could you do that, how could you tell me that you loved me, tell me that you missed me, with another woman lying in your bed? Tell me! Cause honestly I don’t understand how someone could do that without feeling remorseful!!” She yelled forcefully. Her hands balled into fist on his chest while tears poured from her eyes. Her heart crumbling inside her chest as she spoke.      By The Way You’re Talking You Would Think You Never Had Any Real Feelings For Me    They both just stood there for a second. She was sobbing uncontrollably in his arms while he just held her there. He knew that it wasn’t time to say anything yet. Knew that they were just barely scratching the surface of the pain HE had caused her. So he just held her close to him. Hoping that she’d still feel the love in his embrace. A couple of minutes passed before she backed away from him. The tracks of her tears still evident on her cheeks. Reaching up, she wipes her eyes and pulls her hair back and away from her face. Now it’s his turn to stand in awe of this woman. The times he’d push that dark chocolate hair out of her beautiful mix of honey brown and emerald colored eyes. The times when he would stop by her place of business and see how her face would light up when he walked in. How just the mere presence of her could melt away all of his stress and anxiety. A single tear falls from his eyes as he realizes just how much he’s hurt this woman. And yet she still stood here, trying to understand him. Trying to show him that she still loved him. In that moment, he realized one painful truth, he doesn’t deserve her.       And If You Think I Can Look Across The Bar And See You In Someone Else’s Arms And I Need You The minutes passed in painful silence. She half expected him to get defensive. Half expected him to say something to discourage what she had just thrown in his face. Anything other than this kind of dead air. After a couple more seconds, she held up her hands in defeat.  “Do you know what the hardest part is? What hurts the most about all of this? It isn’t that you slept with her. It isn’t that you guys went out on a date and saw a movie.  You could’ve even brought her home to meet mom and it would all be ok with me, if you had just done one simple thing. If you had just told me about it all. Instead you lied. Made me believe that we were alright. That we were still together instead of the opposite. Now whenever I close my eyes I see you and her in bed. Or you and her in the back of the shop. I see you telling her that you love her. I see you taking her to ihop and running your hands through her hair. Everything that you used to do with me, I now see you doing with her. And it hurts. You didn’t just physically cheat on me, you emotionally cheated too. Least that’s what I see. Correct me if I’m wrong. Tell me otherwise. I mean, honestly Nick, how would you feel if that was me? How would you feel if I was telling you I loved you but was also sleeping with another guy? What if I had someone else’s hands where yours have been? How would it make you feel?”  She asked as she stared at him. She only hoped his answer would mirror how she currently felt. That he’d tell her the very thought makes his skin crawl. That just picturing it makes his stomach turn. That it makes his heart plummet to the pit of his chest. Knocks the very wind out of him. All of which she can’t stop from happening to her right now. Just looking at him is driving her crazy because it’s all she can see. It’s like this other woman is standing in the room with them smirking at her as her hands travel up and down his body. Roughly, she shakes her head to clear the sudden image away before it gets worse. Replacing it with one of them in bed last night. Anything to get the taste of her spit outta her mouth.      Oh Who Do You Think You Are Trying To Tell Me That We Could Still Be Friends  “I’m not sure what you want me to say.” He mumbled defeated, his hands hanging loosely at his sides. All of their time together was still playing in his head. This other girl was the last thing on his mind. All he could see in this moment was the gorgeous woman in front of him. Even now, she was trying her hardest to keep it together for him. She always had the weight of the world on her shoulders. Always had ten foot walls up for everyone but him. He finally knew what it felt like to be everyone else.  “Tell me that she means nothing. Tell me that she’s out of your life. Tell me how you feel about me. Tell me that the past two years weren’t a fucking lie! Because as of right now, I can’t believe a word that you have said to me.” She said evenly.  He shivers from the artic tone in her voice and tries to take a step towards her. Only to be rewarded with her taking two steps back.  “Don’t touch me right now. Don’t try and sweet talk me, just answer me.” She says putting both of her hands up as if to defend herself. He sighs and throws his hands out to the sides, frustration from his own actions leaking through.  “She means nothing to me! She’s out of my life! I wouldn’t even bring her home to meet my mother dammit! It was one time! One moment of weakness that I regretted! I love you more than I love her!” He paused after that, realizing the word that just slipped out of his mouth. He glances at her and notices a flash of hurt on her face before she covered it back up with a cold mask.  “You love her.”  She states. He starts to walk towards her again but she holds up her hand. Her other hand quickly unlocking her phone. Jabbing a few of the keys before placing it in her palm again. He can’t see what she did, can’t see who she called, until a familiar voice fills the room.  “Hello?” A chipper female voice asks.  “Hi, is this Tia?” She stares at him blankly as she’s talking to the other woman. The ice in her stare is enough to freeze him to his spot. His heart is hammering inside his chest as he imagines what she is going to say next.  “Yes this is her?” The voice asks cautiously. She smirks as she stares at him. Her arm now crossed in front of her chest. Unknown to him, to keep the last remaining bits of her heart together.  “Hi Tia, this is Nicholas’s EX girlfriend, calling to let you know that you can have him. I just hope you’re happy with my sloppy seconds. And know that you’re getting a man who will tell you he loves you while fucking other women behind your back. So be prepared to have a lot of empty nights full of disappointment.” She hangs up after that, letting everything sink in. She could’ve said more. Could’ve told this woman how she had gotten him to call out her name last night. How he must’ve really cared about a one night stand if he wasn’t willing to bring her home. Or how she must’ve been so important to him since none of his friends knew about her. She could’ve said all of that, but sloppy seconds is exactly what this woman was getting. She was inheriting nights of lying in bed wondering how he felt about her. Days spent not receiving a word from him while she would send text after text. Or maybe this one would be different. Maybe because this other woman needed saving and she didn’t, maybe that was the reason he wanted her. She shook her head as she threw her phone again. This time hitting the wall, cracking her screen.  “Why did you call her?” He asked, still rooted to his spot from across the room. She laughed evilly and then turned towards the door. Each passing second spent wondering if she should just throw her cards on the table or move on. They were both young. They both had time to find someone else. He obviously had, so what was keeping her here. She knew if she turned to face him that she’d melt into his arms. That she would let him take her on the bed and just forget about their problems until morning came.  “Because you have feelings for her. Call it love, like, lust, whatever you want to call it. You still have feelings for her. And as much as I love you. As much as I want a future with you. I won’t be second in your heart. Which you’ve already proven to me these past couple of weeks. Just tell me something, if you hadn’t of been caught. If I hadn’t of found a text of her telling you that she loved you, would you have even told me what was going on? Or would I just have continued to be your side chick, none the wiser. “ She asks, turning around one last time to look at him. He sees it then. Sees every ounce of hurt he has caused. Sees every piece of her shattered heart resting on his bedroom floor. And in that moment he wants to take it all back. He wants to tell Tia to fuck off. Tell his dick to calm the fuck down. Reserve every bit of damage he has done just to see her smile again.  “I was going to tell you. I’m telling you now, I don’t want her. I only see you, I only want you. You’ve given me all of you. And I know I haven’t returned the favor lately. I know I’ve let you down. But please, Nikki, let me make this right. I know you don’t trust a word I say, but let me show you how much I love you. Let me love you the way you deserve to be loved. Please…don’t leave me.” His voice breaks at the end as his own tears start to fall. He reaches out towards her, carefully stepping forward. At first, she’s hesitant. She doesn’t want to be hurt by this man again. But as she looks at the love of her life, she breaks down. She runs into his arms and holds him tight. They hold each other for an hour, just sobbing together in each other’s arms. He kisses the top of her head every once in a while. Pouring all of his love onto her. While she stays guarded. She loves him, but only time will tell if he’s worth it. Or if she should’ve followed her first instinct and walked out that door after hitting ‘End’      You Always Told Me You’d Never Leave Me You Said I Was Your One And Only So What Makes You Think I Wanna Hear You Say That We Can Still Be Friends Hanging On The Weekends Youre Gonna Be Okay If I Start Seeing Somebody New You Hope That I Do If You Really Believe That’s The Truth You Never Loved Me Like I Loved You.

Alternate Ending      They freeze in the center of the room, locked in a tight embrace. And then the scene starts to play in reverse. They back away from each other. The tears that have been shed retreat back up their cheeks. The words that have been said revert back to unspoken thoughts. Lovers standing together now stand several feet apart. She has just clicked end on her phone.  “Why did you call her?” He asked stupidly. She rewards him with a hard stare and then shakes her head. Nothing she says or does is going to get through to him. She takes one last lingering look at the man standing before her. The same man who ignored his friends for ten months. The same man who ignored her on a regular basis. A man who actively chose another woman over her. She couldn’t take it anymore.  “Because she deserves to know what she’s getting herself into. She deserves to know what kind of man you are. I told you the next woman would have to go through me. You deserve each other. Go, save your damsel in distress. Go be the hero. I’m done being second. I’m done with whatever this is. Go be with her since you love her so much.”  She starts to walk out the door when he grabs her hand and pulls her back to him.  “I’m sorry, truly I am. I don’t want her. I’ve already texted her and told her we were over. That what we had was a mistake. Please Nikki, don’t walk out that door. I need you in my life. I need you more than you realize baby, please…” He starts sobbing towards the end. Her heart starts to break at the sight. But her face stays cool and collected. She pulls her hand from his wrist and shakes her head.  “If you truly loved me, if you honestly wanted to be with me, this wouldn’t have happened. You would’ve come out to see me instead of me doing all of the work. You wouldn’t have slept with her at your grandparent’s house. You wouldn’t have been able to find perfection in her at all if you honestly, truly loved me Nicholas. And as much as I love you. As much as doing this is going to break my heart. I have to let you go. I have to save what little dignity I have left.” With that being said, she places a soft kiss on his lips. Savoring the way it makes her feel before turning towards the door again and walking out of his life for good.      We Can Still Be Friends No I Don’t Wanna Be Friends So Stop Telling Me Stop Telling Me That Youre Gonna Be Okay If I Start Seeing Somebody New You Hope That I Do It Won’t Be Long Til I Forget To Call Every Time That I’m Drinking And You Ain’t The Love Song I Can’t Keep From Singing I Gotta Be Honest If You Really Believe That’s The Truth You Never Loved Me Like I Loved You

[nickihstn-blog-blog]

Like I Loved You Version 2 6/7/18

Like I Loved You: Third Person POV       “Seems Like, You’ve Got It All Figured Out. You’re Alright With The Way This Is Going Down.”     The room is deathly quiet. Tensions between the two were mounting with each passing breath. His hands constantly roaming through his tousled hair. While she stood at the other end of the room, her hands balled into fists at her sides.  Neither one knew which step to take forever, but also didn’t want to take several steps back. Both have unshed tears and frustration in their eyes.  Finally, she throws her phone onto the bed between them. A picture of a woman with short red hair, glasses and chubby cheeks still plastered onto the front of it.   “So are we going to address the elephant in the room?” She says, steel like edge to her voice.  She looks at him from across the room. His face never changes, just a brief glance to the picture on her phone.  She takes one last lingering look at the man before her. Man may have been the wrong word for the way he was acting. But a man none the less is what he was supposed to be. She starts to tear up again as she looks at him. At the shoulder length honey blonde hair that she used to run her hands through. The dimples in his smile that made her knees weak. Looking into his hazel eyes now, she notices the love isn’t there. Not like how it used to be. This man in front of her, she doesn’t know him at all.   “What elephant in the room?” He asked stupidly. Without warning and faster than he had ever seen a woman travel, she flew across the room, grabbed her phone, and then stood in front of him just inches from his face.  For a brief moment he just looked at her. Taking in the fire burning in her eyes. Staring in wonder at the love still there underneath it all.   “This! This woman who you’ve let come between us! This bitch of a woman who you told me to apologize too! Which by the way, I shouldn’t have had too. I was only defending my relationship because I assumed she was some psycho. I have instincts you idiot! You honestly thought I couldn’t tell you were being distant? You honestly thought I wouldn’t notice that another woman was trying to move in on you? Little did I know that she had already fallen into your bed at that point. How could you do that, how could you tell me that you loved me, tell me that you missed me, with another woman lying in your bed? Tell me! Cause honestly I don’t understand how someone could do that without feeling remorseful!!” She yelled forcefully. Her hands balled into fist on his chest while tears poured from her eyes. Her heart crumbling inside her chest as she spoke.       By The Way You’re Talking You Would Think You Never Had Any Real Feelings For Me     They both just stood there for a second. She was sobbing uncontrollably in his arms while he just held her there. He knew that it wasn’t time to say anything yet. Knew that they were just barely scratching the surface of the pain HE had caused her. So he just held her close to him. Hoping that she’d still feel the love in his embrace. A couple of minutes passed before she backed away from him. The tracks of her tears still evident on her cheeks. Reaching up, she wipes her eyes and pulls her hair back and away from her face. Now it’s his turn to stand in awe of this woman. The times he’d push that dark chocolate hair out of her beautiful mix of honey brown and emerald colored eyes. The times when he would stop by her place of business and see how her face would light up when he walked in. How just the mere presence of her could melt away all of his stress and anxiety. A single tear falls from his eyes as he realizes just how much he’s hurt this woman. And yet she still stood here, trying to understand him. Trying to show him that she still loved him. In that moment, he realized one painful truth, he doesn’t deserve her.        And If You Think I Can Look Across The Bar And See You In Someone Else’s Arms And I Need You The minutes passed in painful silence. She half expected him to get defensive. Half expected him to say something to discourage what she had just thrown in his face. Anything other than this kind of dead air. After a couple more seconds, she held up her hands in defeat.   “Do you know what the hardest part is? What hurts the most about all of this? It isn’t that you slept with her. It isn’t that you guys went out on a date and saw a movie.  You could’ve even brought her home to meet mom and it would all be ok with me, if you had just done one simple thing. If you had just told me about it all. Instead you lied. Made me believe that we were alright. That we were still together instead of the opposite. Now whenever I close my eyes I see you and her in bed. Or you and her in the back of the shop. I see you telling her that you love her. I see you taking her to ihop and running your hands through her hair. Everything that you used to do with me, I now see you doing with her. And it hurts. You didn’t just physically cheat on me, you emotionally cheated too. Least that’s what I see. Correct me if I’m wrong. Tell me otherwise. I mean, honestly Nick, how would you feel if that was me? How would you feel if I was telling you I loved you but was also sleeping with another guy? What if I had someone else’s hands where yours have been? How would it make you feel?”  She asked as she stared at him. She only hoped his answer would mirror how she currently felt. That he’d tell her the very thought makes his skin crawl. That just picturing it makes his stomach turn. That it makes his heart plummet to the pit of his chest. Knocks the very wind out of him. All of which she can’t stop from happening to her right now. Just looking at him is driving her crazy because it’s all she can see. It’s like this other woman is standing in the room with them smirking at her as her hands travel up and down his body. Roughly, she shakes her head to clear the sudden image away before it gets worse. Replacing it with one of them in bed last night. Anything to get the taste of her spit outta her mouth.       Oh Who Do You Think You Are Trying To Tell Me That We Could Still Be Friends   “I’m not sure what you want me to say.” He mumbled defeated, his hands hanging loosely at his sides. All of their time together was still playing in his head. This other girl was the last thing on his mind. All he could see in this moment was the gorgeous woman in front of him. Even now, she was trying her hardest to keep it together for him. She always had the weight of the world on her shoulders. Always had ten foot walls up for everyone but him. He finally knew what it felt like to be everyone else.   “Tell me that she means nothing. Tell me that she’s out of your life. Tell me how you feel about me. Tell me that the past two years weren’t a fucking lie! Because as of right now, I can’t believe a word that you have said to me.” She said evenly.  He shivers from the artic tone in her voice and tries to take a step towards her. Only to be rewarded with her taking two steps back.   “Don’t touch me right now. Don’t try and sweet talk me, just answer me.” She says putting both of her hands up as if to defend herself. He sighs and throws his hands out to the sides, frustration from his own actions leaking through.   “She means nothing to me! She’s out of my life! I wouldn’t even bring her home to meet my mother dammit! It was one time! One moment of weakness that I regretted! I love you more than I love her!” He paused after that, realizing the word that just slipped out of his mouth. He glances at her and notices a flash of hurt on her face before she covered it back up with a cold mask.   “You love her.”  She states. He starts to walk towards her again but she holds up her hand. Her other hand quickly unlocking her phone. Jabbing a few of the keys before placing it in her palm again. He can’t see what she did, can’t see who she called, until a familiar voice fills the room.   “Hello?” A chipper female voice asks.   “Hi, is this Tia?” She stares at him blankly as she’s talking to the other woman. The ice in her stare is enough to freeze him to his spot. His heart is hammering inside his chest as he imagines what she is going to say next.   “Yes this is her?” The voice asks cautiously. She smirks as she stares at him. Her arm now crossed in front of her chest. Unknown to him, to keep the last remaining bits of her heart together.   “Hi Tia, this is Nicholas’s EX girlfriend, calling to let you know that you can have him. I just hope you’re happy with my sloppy seconds. And know that you’re getting a man who will tell you he loves you while fucking other women behind your back. So be prepared to have a lot of empty nights full of disappointment.” She hangs up after that, letting everything sink in. She could’ve said more. Could’ve told this woman how she had gotten him to call out her name last night. How he must’ve really cared about a one night stand if he wasn’t willing to bring her home. Or how she must’ve been so important to him since none of his friends knew about her. She could’ve said all of that, but sloppy seconds is exactly what this woman was getting. She was inheriting nights of lying in bed wondering how he felt about her. Days spent not receiving a word from him while she would send text after text. Or maybe this one would be different. Maybe because this other woman needed saving and she didn’t, maybe that was the reason he wanted her. She shook her head as she threw her phone again. This time hitting the wall, cracking her screen.   “Why did you call her?” He asked, still rooted to his spot from across the room. She laughed evilly and then turned towards the door. Each passing second spent wondering if she should just throw her cards on the table or move on. They were both young. They both had time to find someone else. He obviously had, so what was keeping her here. She knew if she turned to face him that she’d melt into his arms. That she would let him take her on the bed and just forget about their problems until morning came.   “Because you have feelings for her. Call it love, like, lust, whatever you want to call it. You still have feelings for her. And as much as I love you. As much as I want a future with you. I won’t be second in your heart. Which you’ve already proven to me these past couple of weeks. Just tell me something, if you hadn’t of been caught. If I hadn’t of found a text of her telling you that she loved you, would you have even told me what was going on? Or would I just have continued to be your side chick, none the wiser. “ She asks, turning around one last time to look at him. He sees it then. Sees every ounce of hurt he has caused. Sees every piece of her shattered heart resting on his bedroom floor. And in that moment he wants to take it all back. He wants to tell Tia to fuck off. Tell his dick to calm the fuck down. Reserve every bit of damage he has done just to see her smile again.   “I was going to tell you. I’m telling you now, I don’t want her. I only see you, I only want you. You’ve given me all of you. And I know I haven’t returned the favor lately. I know I’ve let you down. But please, Nikki, let me make this right. I know you don’t trust a word I say, but let me show you how much I love you. Let me love you the way you deserve to be loved. Please…don’t leave me.” His voice breaks at the end as his own tears start to fall. He reaches out towards her, carefully stepping forward. At first, she’s hesitant. She doesn’t want to be hurt by this man again. But as she looks at the love of her life, she breaks down. She runs into his arms and holds him tight. They hold each other for an hour, just sobbing together in each other’s arms. He kisses the top of her head every once in a while. Pouring all of his love onto her. While she stays guarded. She loves him, but only time will tell if he’s worth it. Or if she should’ve followed her first instinct and walked out that door after hitting ‘End’       You Always Told Me You’d Never Leave Me You Said I Was Your One And Only So What Makes You Think I Wanna Hear You Say That We Can Still Be Friends Hanging On The Weekends Youre Gonna Be Okay If I Start Seeing Somebody New You Hope That I Do If You Really Believe That’s The Truth You Never Loved Me Like I Loved You.

Alternate Ending       They freeze in the center of the room, locked in a tight embrace. And then the scene starts to play in reverse. They back away from each other. The tears that have been shed retreat back up their cheeks. The words that have been said revert back to unspoken thoughts. Lovers standing together now stand several feet apart. She has just clicked end on her phone.   “Why did you call her?” He asked stupidly. She rewards him with a hard stare and then shakes her head. Nothing she says or does is going to get through to him. She takes one last lingering look at the man standing before her. The same man who ignored his friends for ten months. The same man who ignored her on a regular basis. A man who actively chose another woman over her. She couldn’t take it anymore.   “Because she deserves to know what she’s getting herself into. She deserves to know what kind of man you are. I told you the next woman would have to go through me. You deserve each other. Go, save your damsel in distress. Go be the hero. I’m done being second. I’m done with whatever this is. Go be with her since you love her so much.”  She starts to walk out the door when he grabs her hand and pulls her back to him.   “I’m sorry, truly I am. I don’t want her. I’ve already texted her and told her we were over. That what we had was a mistake. Please Nikki, don’t walk out that door. I need you in my life. I need you more than you realize baby, please…” He starts sobbing towards the end. Her heart starts to break at the sight. But her face stays cool and collected. She pulls her hand from his wrist and shakes her head.   “If you truly loved me, if you honestly wanted to be with me, this wouldn’t have happened. You would’ve come out to see me instead of me doing all of the work. You wouldn’t have slept with her at your grandparent’s house. You wouldn’t have been able to find perfection in her at all if you honestly, truly loved me Nicholas. And as much as I love you. As much as doing this is going to break my heart. I have to let you go. I have to save what little dignity I have left.” With that being said, she places a soft kiss on his lips. Savoring the way it makes her feel before turning towards the door again and walking out of his life for good.       We Can Still Be Friends No I Don’t Wanna Be Friends So Stop Telling Me Stop Telling Me That Youre Gonna Be Okay If I Start Seeing Somebody New You Hope That I Do It Won’t Be Long Til I Forget To Call Every Time That I’m Drinking And You Ain’t The Love Song I Can’t Keep From Singing I Gotta Be Honest If You Really Believe That’s The Truth You Never Loved Me Like I Loved You

[thedietian]

30 Day No Alcohol Challenge – 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge

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I Went from Fat and Broke to Hosting SportsCenter on ESPN by Making One Simple Change… Take The 30-Day No Alcohol Challenge And Change Your Life

As a bonus for holding your spot now, we will also send you a free guide on how to socialize without drinking. Your free guide will be sent immediately to your inbox.

Next Challenge Begins Monday  12/4…

WHAT PEOPLE IN THE 30 DAY NO ALCOHOL CHALLENGE ARE SAYING

It’s about a normal guy who drank alcohol.

A few glasses of wine during the week after work to relax. Some beer on the weekends with friends. A few drinks when celebrating birthdays, weddings, anniversaries and watching football games.

It was social drinking. Fun.

He didn’t have an alcohol problem or got into trouble.

But it was part of his routine. 

Over time, he put on 20lbs (9kg). A beer belly hung over his belt buckle.

His face looked puffy and weathered.

He wasn’t sleeping well and always felt tired, sluggish, irritable.

He liked his job but didn’t love it. His relationships were ok but not amazing. 

He was merely existing. Not thriving. Not happy.

The man in the story is me.

On March 10, 2010, I went for a ‘hangover breakfast’ at the International House of Pancakes (IHOP), after a fun night at the South by Southwest festival.

Everything made me feel nauseous. The big, bright, bold colors on the IHOP menus. The sights and smells of greasy, unhealthy food.

I felt rock bottom so made the instant decision to go 30 days alcohol-free: a personal bet to test my self-discipline.

The first two weeks were hard. When I went out with friends and ordered water, they gave me a hard time. “You’re un-Australian!” they’d say.

But I survived those two weeks. I felt better, slept better and had more mental clarity.

After 30 days, I’d lost an incredible 13lbs (5.9kg) of fat around my stomach. Just from stopping drinking.

I had more money in the bank. My skin looked considerably better, and I enjoyed getting out of bed for early morning exercise.

“Bugger it. I feel great,” I said to myself. “Just keep going and see how far you can go.” Little did I know just how far I would go.

After 60 days, I craved a cold beer. Or a red wine. Or a Bombay Sapphire gin and tonic with a dash of lime.

When it was hot outside, I started dreaming, “I could smash a cold beer right now!” But I breathed deeply, downed some water, and the feeling passed.

After three months, I felt terrific. I’d dropped a few more pounds of fat and started to put on lean muscle in the gym. People complimented me on how good I looked.

Despite not drinking, I still managed to have wildly entertaining nights out – even with my drunken friends slurring their words around me.

I could be the life of the party, and no one would notice that I wasn’t drinking.

I could still burn the midnight oil until 5 am but didn’t want to: nothing good happened after1 am, anyway.

When I told women I wasn’t drinking, far from them thinking I was an alcoholic in recovery, they were impressed with my self-discipline. Conversations became more meaningful.

“Beautiful,” I thought. “I can stop drinking and still be fun, entertaining and attractive to women.”

Guys were always suspicious of my story, thinking that I was an alcoholic in recovery.

Some idiots even tried to slip vodka into my water.

It was part of the test. I just smiled, pointed to my head and said, “I’m too strong in mind.”

I was then up at 8 am on weekends to hit the gym. I’d showered, had breakfast and was ready to tackle the day by 11 am when my mates were just dragging their lazy, hungover backsides out of bed.

Between three and six months I was in the zone. I felt energetic and healthy. I thrived on telling people I had temporarily stopped drinking.

Six to 12 months was fairly easy, but here I noticed the most dramatic changes.

My relationships became considerably better – romantic and platonic. I constantly thought, “How can I help others, rather than how can they help me?”

I became calmer and made better decisions.

My work productivity soared. 

More opportunities – like an ESPN audition to host SportsCenter – came my way. When it did, I had clarity and energy to win the gig and host SportsCenter for two years.

When I reached the personal milestone of one year without drinking, I found myself back in Austin at South by Southwest. I went to a pub, ordered a Budweiser, and put it to my mouth.

I had every intention of drinking that beer. But something stopped me from taking a sip. I paused and thought about it for a minute.

I decided that all the pros of not drinking outnumbered the cons. So I said to myself, “I’ll just keep going.”

So I did. I put the Budweiser down and haven’t picked up a drink since.

I’m 20lbs (9kg) lighter today than I was when I started my 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge. I’m 38lbs (17kg) lighter than when I was at my heaviest.

Drinking kept fat around my waist. Stopping drinking eliminated it. This is likely due to three main things:

1. Alcohol contains a lot of empty calories.

2. Drinking makes you eat a lot more food, especially junk like fries and desserts.

3. Quitting drinking gives you the energy to be more active.

You don’t need to quit drinking entirely like I did. But my story clearly shows some of the positive benefits of even a 30-day break from alcohol.

Feel better, look better, lose weight, save money and have better relationships.

Now, that’s a cocktail.

30 DAY NO ALCOHOL CHALLENGE

After my success, my friends started asking me how I looked so good.

So I decided I had to create a more formal 30-day challenge.

So that’s what I did. I put everything I learned about breaking habits, staying self-disciplined, losing weight, making money, staying the course of 30 days into one system.

One system to help people break their reliance on alcohol.

One system that stays with you all along the 30 days.

I call that system, the “30-Day No Alcohol Challenge”.

As a bonus for holding your spot now, we will also send you a free guide on how to socialize without drinking. Your free guide will be sent immediately to your inbox.

CHANGE OCCURS AMONG OTHER PEOPLE

When you sign up for my challenge, you automatically get access to my exclusive closed “30 Day No Alcohol Challenge” Facebook group. Here, you will find hundreds of other people supporting you in your challenge.

Don’t rely on brute willpower alone. Let other people support you. In the New York Times best-seller “The Power of Habit” by Charles Duhigg, it says people only change when “there were embedded in social groups that made change easier.”

“When people join groups where change seems possible, the potential for that change to occur becomes more real. For most people who overhaul their lives, there are no seminal moment of life-altering disasters. There are simply communities who make change believable.

Put simply, “Change occurs among other people.”

As a bonus for holding your spot now, we will also send you a free guide on how to socialize without drinking. Your free guide will be sent immediately to your inbox.

JOIN OUR CHALLENGE AND TRY 30 DAYS WITHOUT ALCOHOL

Test it. See how you feel.    See if it works for you.

After 30 days, you can decide to stay quit.

Or reduce your alcohol intake from there.

If you’re happy drinking, keep drinking.

I love to drink a six-pack of beer and a bottle of red with the best of them.

I’m sure I’ll do it again one day.

But for now, I’m happy with water and soda and feel like I am the best version of me.

WHAT 30 DAY NAC MEMBERS ARE SAYING IN OUR GROUP

CELEBRITIES AND ENTREPRENEURS WHO QUIT OR REDUCED ALCOHOL

Billionaire Donald Trump says: “I don’t drink, and it’s very easy for me not to drink. I tell people, ‘What are you drinking for?’ And they don’t even understand what I’m saying.”

Warren Buffett says: “It’s the weakest link that causes the problem. It may be alcohol, it may be gambling, it may be a lot of things. It may be nothing, which is terrific. But it is a real weakest link problem.”

Steve Jobs, Apple Founder and CEO, didn’t drink. He was a part of President Obama’s Technology Summit dinner. In the much-circulated photograph of the group’s dinnertime toast, Jobs is holding a glass of water.

Tyra Banks, Model and Media Mogul says: “I feel like I’ve been very lucky because I don’t really have an addictive personality. I had a little taste of alcohol when I was 12 years old, but that’s about it.”

Jennifer Lopez, Singer, Actress, Media Icon, says: “I think that ruins your skin. Of course, during celebratory toasts, everybody’s like, ‘You can’t toast with water!’ So I’ll toast with alcohol and just take a sip.”

Larry Ellison, Cofounder and CEO of Oracle; No. 5 on Forbes’ list of The World’s Billionaires, says: “I can’t stand anything that clouds my mind. … I have no problem with people drinking; I have no problem with people smoking dope. If that’s what they want to do, God bless them, that’s their business. But I can’t do those things.”

Joe Manganiello: “There was a period of about four years where I needed to quit drinking. And the drinking got in the way [of my career]. It was one of those obstacles that I had to get over and once again I needed to clear the road in order for these things to happen, so it really is an inside job. I had to clean up my act and figure that whole situation out. I haven’t drunk in over 11 years. My life was ruined. I was homeless, careless and broke with no career, so yes, it was worth it [to get sober].”

Soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo does not drink: “I avoid alcohol. Make sure you stay hydrated. Drinking water is so important.”

Singer and record producer Calvin Harris says he quit drinking after a series of incidents: “I gave up drinking because bad things happened. Things that you just think: ‘I really shouldn’t have done that.’ There have been lots of gigs when I’ve looked back and gone: ‘Oh, it was on television, a lot of people saw that, and I was totally inebriated.’ I’ve had the best year of my life not drinking, it’s been great.”

YOUR SATISFACTION IS GUARANTEED

TRY OUT THE 30 DAY CHALLENGE & VIP COACHING CALLS AT JAMES’S RISK FOR A FULL 30 DAYS

As a bonus for holding your spot now, we will also send you a free guide on how to socialize without drinking. Your free guide will be sent immediately to your inbox.

OMG! I absolutely adore you, James Swanwick! You are absolutely correct, there are no excuses anymore. Thank you for doing this! You have no idea how much it has helped me and inspired me. My life has changed so much for the better since coming across your No Alcohol Challenge

You’ve inspired me, James – thank you from the cockles of my heart. I was alcohol free for nearly 2 years & felt ALIVE. I then turned to wine for comfort. 2 years later I’m ready to say goodbye to this old friend. Thank you for the inspiration you don’t even know you’ve stirred in me. Thank you so much!

Day 31! It is accomplished! Delighted that I went the full 30 days. Thanks James, for the help in kickstarting a new personal change and development effort. Amazing what can happen after going without alcohol for just one month!

“A big thank you to everyone in facebook group and James for doing this 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge . This has really changed a lot of things in my life. For the past decade I have been destroying my body every weekend. So this has been a breath of fresh air honestly. My skin looks a lot better. I used to have these little bumps under my eyes. Now they are virtually gone. I am way more productive. I am finding ways to do all kinds of things I didn’t know existed before. It’s wild. And one of the coolest things is I have a lot better control over my emotions. Things that used to bum me out in the past just don’t really bum me out anymore. I can see the importance of certain things much easier now. I want to say thank you very much. I finished my 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge on Easter. It’s been an incredible ride. And hey, if you’re still doing it, keep going! You are going to find out amazing things about yourself. Thanks again!”

DON: “We recently completed the 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge. When I first started, I was sceptical. I didn’t think 30 days would be enough to create any meaningful change. That was very surprising to me. The 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge turned out to be more than enough for us to reset and create new habits for ourselves. It’s given us a new perspective on how alcohol fits into our lives. And making that commitment to spend money to join the program made a big difference for me. I really participated in the initial exercises and I looked forward every day to receiving James’s videos on my iPhone. They kept me inspired to finish and there was no question I was going to finish this program. We are going to the gym more often, going to bed earlier, everything seems to be going better for us. Thank you for putting this program together, James. It’s awesome!

SYLVIE: I initially started to support Don but it helped me understand a couple of things about myself and alcohol and how I don’t need it to have a good time at a party. It was very helpful for us and for me and our relationship. And we saved a lot of money!”

“I feel amazing after completing the 30-Day No Alcohol Challenge. Not only has my sleep improved, but my mental clarity and energy has skyrocketed! My weekends are no longer spent tired, irritable, and foggy, but instead, vibrant, productive and happy! My overall health has improved and my workouts have been more energetic. This challenge is for anyone, regardless of how much alcohol you drink (daily, weekly, or monthly). Abstaining or limiting your alcohol intake for 30 days can have huge benefits on your overall health, wellness, your relationships and especially your sleep habits. I would recommend James Swanwick’s program to anyone who wants to reclaim their weekends, and live a happy, vibrant and more productive life.”

As a bonus for holding your spot now, we will also send you a free guide on how to socialize without drinking. Your free guide will be sent immediately to your inbox.

So right now I want to find amazing people out there who want to get back on track.

This page you’re reading right now is like my personal ‘radar’. It’s a way to send out a signal and see if I can locate just a few of you. Those of you with big dreams.

Because let’s face it. If you felt like everything was ok with your life right now, you wouldn’t be reading this.

You’re still reading because maybe you haven’t got what you wanted in life. And maybe the alcohol is one of the reasons or No. 1 reason.

Maybe you’re sick of waking up each morning with a hangover. Maybe you’re sick of feeling like you’ve made a fool of yourself out on the drink, maybe you said the wrong thing and it’s affected a friendship or a relationship.

Maybe you got so drunk one night and made a complete ass of yourself. Maybe you know you’re hanging out with the wrong crowd.

Or you’re not very ambitious.

Or you have a bad relationship with your family and only have a few friends.

Maybe you’re not the type of husband material you thought you were.

Or the wife you want to be.

Or the boyfriend or girlfriend.

Maybe you’re a guy and you feel dependent on drinking to be able to get up the courage to approach a girl.

Or you’re spending a ridiculous amount of money on drinking and drinking-related activities that you can’t afford to pay rent, or invest for the future.

Maybe you feel like you’re fat or overweight or drinking makes you have to force yourself out of bed in the morning.

Or you feel that peer group pressure to drink in order to be one of the boys, or one of the girls.

Or you feel like you have to drink to fit in. Or you just hate hangovers. They’re the worst right?

When you join the 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge, you’ll discover how to do this – how to actually take a break for 30 days. And your life is going to change.

Imagine waking up in the morning and springing out of bed, rather than dragging your arse out of the bed in the morning.

Actually getting 7 or 8 hours uninterrupted sleep.

People will say to you, “Man, your skin looks good. Have you been working out?’

Imagine how different your life will become with better relationships.

Imagine true love from your partner.

Or if you’re single, being able to finally attract a better mate.

A higher quality of mate. Rather than picking up drunk girls or drunk guys and waking up in a stupor, you’re able to attract a partner with your conversation and your positivity and your health.

Or doing it for your kids.

You want to be closer to your kids?

Give up the booze for 30 days and watch how much closer you get to them.

When you save money, think of the financial stress you’re not going to have.

Research shows that 80% of all marriages end because of financial stress.

Not being able to pay the bills or have the good things a prosperous life offers is absolute poison for a relationship.

But with some extra money in the pocket, from saving money, and from being able to focus on money-making activities, you’ll be full of abundance and prosperity.

And have better relationships.

You can save money towards a big house in a beautiful neighborhood; traveling the world, or providing the best education and opportunities for your children, being able to help your friends and family who are less well off than you, or changing the world, taking a break from alcohol is going to make you more money.

That’s what you will experience when you do the 30-day No Alcohol Challenge.

THESE ARE THE PEOPLE WHO’VE SUCCESSFULLY TAKEN THE 30 DAY NO ALCOHOL CHALLENGE AND / OR HAVE REDUCED OR QUIT DRINKING

JOIN JAMES SWANWICK AS HE GUIDES YOU WITH A DAILY VIDEO PROGRAM TO SHOW YOU THE WAY TO 30 DAYS WITHOUT ALCOHOL AND THE POWER IT CAN HAVE IN TRANSFORMING YOUR HEALTH, WEALTH, LOVE AND HAPPINESS

As a bonus for holding your spot now, we will also send you a free guide on how to socialize without drinking. Your free guide will be sent immediately to your inbox.

I’LL SEND YOU A DAILY VIDEO LESSON

Once you start, you will receive a daily video lesson from me, delivered to your email inbox.

You simply open the email, watch the short video I’ve recorded for you, and you stay on track.

I don’t let you figure it out on your own.

I’m with you all along the way.

These daily emails will keep you motivated, make sure you don’t get sidetracked and inspire you to stay the course.

AND you’ll also be part of a community of other people doing their 30-day no alcohol challenges.

Alright, so right now, you have an important decision to make. Most likely one of the most important decisions you’ll ever make. One that could have a dramatic effect on not only your love and social life, but also your mental well being. What it comes down to is this.

You can go on from here alone and keep doing what you’ve been doing all along the same way before you found this page, continuing to experience the frustrations and challenges that brought you here in the first place.

Or you can click the link below right now and get access to The 30-Day No Alcohol Challenge system. The system for getting back on track.

Do it now because at any moment, it will be closed forever and never mentioned again. Obviously, I can’t make the decision for you.

But I honestly believe everything happens for a reason and it’s no accident you’re here right now watching this.

Go ahead and give it a try.

You risk nothing and you’re fully guaranteed to make more money, lose weight, sleep better and have better relationships.It’s really that simple. I wouldn’t make this promise if I wasn’t absolutely sure it would work for you.

When you click the button below, you can feel confident that you will finally start getting the life that you truly deserve. Go ahead, right now, click the button below and just enter your information on the secure 256-bit SSL encrypted form on the next page.

Your information is 100% confidential and you will enjoy full privacy inside our instant access membership area.

Soon, you’ll look back on this moment as a crucial turning point in your life. Everything is going to change and you’ll never have to be alone again.

Never again will you feel the pain of rejection.

Right now, everything changes. When you get your first success, go ahead and send me an email. Or post about it in the closed facebook group.

Nothing makes me happier than seeing the transformation I can help make in people’s lives. Click the button below to get started. Thank you for reading. I look forward to seeing you in the program.

As a bonus for holding your spot now, we will also send you a free guide on how to socialize without drinking. Your free guide will be sent immediately to your inbox.

Click here to get 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge – 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge at discounted price while it’s still available…

All orders are protected by SSL encryption – the highest industry standard for online security from trusted vendors. 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge – 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge is backed with a 60 Day No Questions Asked Money Back Guarantee. If within the first 60 days of receipt you are not satisfied with Wake Up Lean, you can request a refund by sending an email to the address given inside the product and we will immediately refund your entire purchase price, with no questions asked.

The post 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge – 30 Day No Alcohol Challenge appeared first on The Dietian.

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[cgpsimpromptu-blog]

Psychick (Pt. 2)

by Ben Togut

I awake in a green reclining chair in a whitewashed room smelling harshly of antiseptic. How cliché. The three small clocks above the door create a cacophonous ticking that make my head spin and my skin crawl. Finally, a fat nurse opens the door, waddles toward me, and starts interrogating me like the goddamn CIA.

“Name?

“Vera.”

“Vera what?

“Black. Vera Black.”

“Date of birth?”

“Why?”

She scowls at me before repeating herself.

“October 18th, 1977.”

“Next of kin?”

“Do I count?”

“Do you have anyone you’d like us to call? Your mother?”

“Yeah, like she’d take a three-hour flight to see me.”

“Father?”

“I don’t know my father.”

“Well, we have to release you to somebody.”

“I’m a grown ass adult. I can take care of myself.”

“Miss, you just had a concussion. We’re required to release you to somebody.”

I play dead, because I hear that helps if you want to avoid people, or make them shut up. It works, because she sighs and closes the door. How the hell am I going to get out of here? If no one shows up to get me, will they ever let me out? I need to get out before I lose it. As my head continues throbbing, I stare at the ceiling for hours. When the lights in the hallway are finally dimmed, I rip out the IV and slowly slink out of the reclining chair and into the empty hallway, my hand gliding across the right wall to try to find an exit. Blood from where the IV was inserted into my arm paints the wall as I stumble in the darkness. Finally, I enter the waiting room, which is bathed in harsh, white light, and the contrast almost blinds me. Suddenly, all eyes are immediately focused on me. I quicken my pace, making a beeline for the door. Out of nowhere, a security guard grabs me firmly by the wrist.

“Miss, where do you think you’re going?”

I smirk at him, before delivering a right jab to his ribs, causing him to double over, as I run out of the waiting room and into the invigorating night air.

After sprinting for what seems like hours, with the hospital far behind me, I pause to stop wheezing and gather my breath. The blood in my head is pulsing, and some blood from the bandage trickles down my forehead before pooling at my chin. I follow the dirt path before me through clumps of evergreens; my feet caked with dead leaves and damp soil. Suddenly, harsh light pierces my vision. I find myself at the edge of a large highway. The neon reds and yellows of car lights cars speed by me. Vera. Pain blossoms in my head, and he’s there again. Vera. I grasp the trunk of a lamppost, pressing my face onto its cool surface. Vera. With my arms fully stretched in both directions, I stride onto the highway. Belligerent drivers honk and swerve around me. By some miracle, I manage to cross the road unscathed. My eyes closed, I stumble in the grass on the opposite side of the highway with my arms stretched in front of me. My feet touch down on rough, textured pavement. I feel a hand grasp my wrist, and immediately jerk my neck upwards, my eyes straining open. The old man places a hand on my shoulder and asks, “Miss, are you alright?” I let out a high-pitched laugh before stroking his face with my fingertips.    “C’mon,” he replies, leading me past what seems like a gas station and into the bright lights of the mini mart.

“Do you have a… a phone?”

“There’s a payphone right outside.”

With three unstable strides, I reach the payphone. I dig into the pocket of my jacket, pressing four, frigid quarters into the palm of my hand before inserting them into the slot. After frantically entering in a number, I clutch the phone to my ear.

“Hello? Who is this,” answers a wispy voice.

“Who do you think it is?”

“Vera? Do you realize what time it is?”

“You said I could call anytime.”

“It’s 1:30 in the morning, Vera. Jesus.”

“I need to talk to you.”

“Come in tomorrow and we can discuss this.”

“I won’t be there tomorrow. I’m going away.”

“Vera-”

“I’m going away. I’m going to find him.”

“Who?”

“Him. My dad.”

“Vera, as your therapist, I do not approve of this decision.”

“It’s funny that you think, you with your big Ph.D. and awful fashion sense, that you know what’s best for me. You don’t! I figured it out, and I’m going to find him. Don’t you realize, this whole time it's been him, he’s the voice.”

“Vera, right now you’re in a fragile mental state. Your judgment is severely impaired.”

“I don’t care what my mother said, about it not being a good decision to meet him. Blah blah blah! Screw her! I’m going to Denver!” I slam the phone down before he can say another word. I pull out the crumpled slip of paper from my pocket with the address, 1080 Walnut Street, Denver, Colorado, written in charcoal drawing pencil. Ever since my mother gave it to me ten years ago, I have made it a habit to always carry around his address, in case the longing brewing within me became unbearable, and I couldn’t stand not knowing him for another second. But now, standing at the edge of the highway, I am the most stuck I have ever been in my life, knowing exactly where to go but having no way of getting there. With no better plan, I start walking, past the gas station, past the madness. As the lights of cars blur by me, I keep walking, the sky appearing more like a painting than something of reality. The brilliant crimsons and mauves of dawn explode into the dazzling cerulean of morning, and here I am, thumb extended to drivers who wouldn’t let me have a ride if their life depended on it. Although my body feels frozen and laced with ice, my muscles burn and ache, and it’s not long before I’m gritting my teeth with every step, the blisters on my feet scraping against the harsh pavement. Thunder explodes above me, streaks of lightning rippling through the sky. Covering my ears with my hands, I scream out into the void.

I am awakened by the sound of a gentle voice. “Miss, are you alright?” Blinding light floods my senses.

“Sure,” I respond, my eyes still closed.

“Is there any way I can help you?”

“No…. Wait, do you have a car?”

    Turns out Joe is a trucker. An all-American, KFC-obsessed trucker with a severe nicotine addiction. Trust me, I know all about him. Throughout the ride, he doesn’t stop rambling on and on and on about his pathetic little farm boy life. It’s like watching Duck Dynasty and being handcuffed to the seat, powerless to avoid the stream of verbal diarrhea and cultivated ignorance. He’s on his way to Boulder for a potato conference, five miles outside of Denver, and has agreed to drop me off at the city limits. While he continues ranting, I rest my face against the glass of the window, watching the passing landscape gradually become more rugged. The farther south we travel, the more the trees seem to disappear, making the air drier and harder to breathe. After hours of what feels like imprisonment in the truck, I am restless and miserable, and keep having to kick my feet against the dashboard to stop them from falling asleep. Joe doesn’t seem to mind. He seems cheery as ever, after blasting banjo music and singing along to his favorite redneck bands for the past few hours. When Dolly Parton’s “I Will Always Love You” comes on the radio, he gets really worked up, proceeding to sing the chorus in a grating, unbearable voice. Despite the echoes of Joe’s haunting falsetto, I somehow manage to fall asleep.

A man sits in the corner of a dark room, illuminated by the pale flame of a long, thin candle. Something about him seems vaguely familiar, yet distant and uninviting. His eyes pierce right through me, making the acid rise in my stomach. “Hello, Vera.” From his left hand dangles a female puppet, which he makes twitch and dance with the slightest movement of his fingers. As I near the marionette, a sense of foreboding courses through me as its familiar features come into focus. Its chocolate-colored hair and blistered feet send a kind of wild electricity down my spine. My body is paralyzed, eyes fixed to this all too realistic woman. “Boo,” he whispers into my ear, causing me to fall backward and bang my head on the hard wooden floor. He erupts into a fit of laughter, and then the candle is extinguished. I wake up with a start.

“Whoa,” Joe shouts. “What happened to you?”

“Just a bad dream.”

“An IHOP is coming up in a few miles. We should stop and eat.” Half an hour later, we are parked outside of a small line of stores on the side of the highway. Since I have no appetite, I take the opportunity to walk around and stretch my legs while Joe eats. Jesus, I swear I almost got a blood clot from being held up in that truck for hours. The rocks in the pavement bury themselves into the scabs in my feet, making me scream out into the ruins of suburbia. Finally, I spot a message from God: a Payless. I get black tennis shoes, which are ugly as hell but so damn comfortable.

Joe is surprisingly quiet for the rest of the day, lolling in his carbohydrate daze, and before sunset we reach Colorado. My eyes paint the passing road with the words I have not yet spoken, spoken to him. The almost three days on the road have been three days too long. I need to find him now. Joe pulls over to the side of the road just outside of Boulder to stop for the night, and before long he’s out cold. Rifling through the glove compartment for the hell of it, my fingers brush across something cool and metallic. Grabbing it, I sneak out of the truck and cross to the other side of the quiet road, pressing the gun against my head and pretending to shoot. Boom. I double over with hyena-like laughter. Like I’d ever kill myself. Ha!

With labored steps, I walk toward the bright lights ahead, my eyes making out the outline of a bus stop in the distance. As I take the gun off safety, an almost mystical sense of power and control courses through me. I’m not Vera. No, right now I’m Superwoman: a gritty goddess with the searing vengeance of a thousand yellow jackets. After arriving at the bus stop, I sit down, pulling the hood of my jacket over my head to avoid being seen.

“Who are you dressed as?” an elderly woman with long silver hair and chestnut eyes asks me.

“What?”

“It’s Halloween. Who are you dressed as? Jessica Jones? I mean I just figured, with the gun and all.”

“Who’s that?” I respond before quickly tucking the gun into the right pocket of my jacket.

“Oh, she’s an interesting character from this wonderful new series on Netflix. I first saw it with a man named Harvey; we matched on Plenty of Fish...”

Before she can finish, the bus approaches us, screeching to a halt. As I get on, I pray that it is going in the right direction as I stare out the window at the falling snow. "I hear there’s going to be a blizzard." As the woman from before sits down next to me, continuing her little directionless story, I push past her and towards the front of the bus, sitting down on the floor next to the driver’s seat. He turns to me, giving me a quizzical expression.

“Miss, what are you doing?”

“So where are we going?”

“Edgewater.”

“Yeah... I need to go to Walnut Street."

"Miss, I can't just take you anywhere you want."

I reach into the pocket of my coat before placing a hundred-dollar bill in his lap.

"I'm sorry, but I can't accept bribes."

My hand dives back into my coat before taking out an additional four hundred.

"Fine."

    An hour later, I get off the bus, now filled with puzzled passengers, and knock on my father’s door. A middle-aged woman with vivid rose lipstick and frizzy blond hair opens the door in her pajamas.

“Hello? Who are you? Do you know how late it is?”

“Hi. I’m looking for Calvin Peterson.”

“How exactly do you know my husband?”

“Let’s just say he’s an old friend.”

“Alright...” she responds, her shifty eyes seeming to examine every bone and muscle in my face. “Cal works the night shift at Cork, which is a little ways down the road. It’s to the left of the gas station. You can’t miss it.”

I stride away without looking back or thanking her for the directions. A few minutes later, the gas station comes into view. A strange silence pervades the snowy air, and there is no one in sight. Next to the gas station, a red neon sign with the word Cork flashes above the entrance to a small bar. Inviting myself in, I step inside as the wind chimes above the door jingle harshly.

“Hello? Who’s there?” asks a coarse voice from behind the dark bar. “It’s two in the morning. We close at two every night. Everybody knows that.”

“I’m actually not interested in alcohol at the moment,” I retort, coasting gradually to the bar. “I wanted to talk to you.”

“Oh yeah? What for?” The man flicks a switch, filling the room with the glow of fluorescent lights. My father is a tall, wiry man in his early sixties, his skin weathered and tan from years of living in the Southwest.

“Does the name Geraldine Black ring a bell?”

“Geraldine? How do you know Geraldine?”

“She’s my mother.”

“Wait are you....... Vera?”

“No, she had another child whose father left her.”

“Vera,” he says, reaching out his hand, which I slap away.

“Don’t touch me, you monster! It’s all your fault.”

“Why did you come all this way if you’re just going to call me names?”

“I wouldn’t have. Honestly, I wouldn’t have wasted my time. But then one day it all made sense, after all those years of useless medication, that I’m not crazy. It’s you.”

“What do you mean it’s me?”

“It’s you. You’re the voice in my head.”

“Jesus Christ. You know what? You’re just as crazy as I thought you’d be. Why the hell do you think I left? It wasn’t your mother. It was you. Even then, when you were three, I knew you were just like her, my mother. She heard ghosts in her head, and after a while nothing she ever said made sense. I left her, and I had to leave you. People like you just imprison everyone around them. I think I’ve had enough of you for one lifetime. Good night and get out.”

“Ha. Make me.”

With one fell swoop, he picks me up, throws me over his shoulder, and carries me out of the bar and toward the gas station. Shrill screams erupt from deep within me, and giving up, he finally puts me down.

“Get yourself a cab,” he growls at me, pointing to a nearby phone booth.

“I don’t think so,” I snap back, pulling the trucker’s gun out of my coat and pointing it at him, steadying it with both hands.

“You’re not in your right mind. Give me the gun,” he responds, walking towards me. With that, I pull the trigger, sending a bullet right through his head. For a few minutes, all is still, and silence is by my side. Then I hear static in the back of my mind, like a radio stuck forever between two channels. Laughter pierces the static, and then I hear him again. Oh Vera. What a silly girl you are. You thought it was our pathetic little nobody of a father. I’m so much stronger than he ever was. You’ll never run away from me. You must know who I am now. Look in the snow. Through the dim light, I can just make out the words “never forget” spelled out in a gasoline rainbow around my father’s body.  Suddenly, the finality of it all comes crashing down around me, and I can’t breathe.

“See you in hell,” I respond, before putting the barrel of the gun to the roof of my mouth and squeezing the trigger.

    Snow sugarcoated the towering evergreens. My father lay sprawled on the cool pavement; his limbs twisted beyond recognition, forming an ironic snow angel in the dusted fluff, a pained expression on his ghostly face. My body lay beside him. Finally, there is silence.