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sturnsmadl · 9 days ago

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matt c.ai bot masterlist!

divider made by the talented @issysh3ll :)

if any links do not work or are wrong please pm or inbox me :)

♡-fluff ☆-angst ❄-dealer!matt ✿-mads favs!

tour.♡

in which you're very nervous to meet your favourite influencers but you're next in line to finally see matt first on their tour.

my man.♡☆

in which matt is your boyfriend and he's on tour with his brothers so your only contact with him is through the phone.

enemies to lovers.☆

in which matt is your enemy but you're forced to visit his house but you feel someone staring at you.

yapper.☆♡

in which you talk a lot and your boyfriend matt seems to be getting bored of you especially when you go over to him infront of his friends.

stop.♡☆

in which you and matt are dating but he hates that you drink, you thought you got away with being slightly drunk until he tastes the alcohol on your breath.

overprotective.♡☆

in which matt is your brother and him and his best friend nate became very overprotective over you since you became pregnant young.

whats the issue?☆

in which you and matt are enemies but now you've been left at a party while you're drunk your spamming him.

sorry.☆♡

in which matt is your single dad and he isn't a fan of your current boyfriend because he's aware of his past behaviour.

eastside.☆♡❄

in which matt is your criminal boyfriend but you're the police cheifs daughter and obviously your dad blames matt for your behaviour recently.

ew.☆

in which matt is the popular mean boy who for some reason seems to target you but you're really smart so you get asked to tutor him for him to stay on the lacrosse team.

live.☆♡

in which you and matt are very popular online but your relationship is completely secret but you accidentally reveal the truth on live.

your drug dealer.♡☆❄

in which matt is your drug dealer but recently hes been acting like hes your boyfriend despite you just being a customer.

still in love?♡☆

in which matt broke up with you for no reason and you started dating his enemy to get back at him but hes not done with you completely.

holiday.♡☆

in which you and your dad go to the beach despite your dad not wanting to take you and you end up meeting a cute boy.

love island.♡☆

in which you and matt take part in the tv show game, love island and once you get there matt is the first to catch your eye.

injuries♡☆

in which you are the triplets best friend but you haven't been able to make contact with them since a situation happened at your house but now you're back.

under control.♡☆❄

in which matt is your biggest enemy who constantly gives you mixed signals but you do what you want either way.

like a dog.☆

in which you and matt are on and off because hes obsessed with you no matter who wants him but you dont want your graduation ruined so you finally block him.

pr.♡

in which you and matt are popular influencers and today you're getting ready to film a pr unboxing after finding out you were pregnant.

im gonna kill her.♡☆

in which matt is your best friends brother who treats you like his own sister and when he finds out your drunk despite being nothing like that he rushes to you.

livestream.♡☆

in which you and matt are in a long distance relationship and you go live on instagram late at night.

hush.❄♡☆

in which you are the quiet girl and matt is the drug dealer who keeps it a secret but one day on the way to school you accidentally witness it.

attached.♡☆

in which you recently became popular online and matt has become clingy as every, especially when filming with his brothers.

candy salad♡☆

in which you and your boyfriend, matt decide to do the social media trend 'trauma candy salad'

healthy.♡☆

in which you and matt broke up in a healthy way which you think hurt more but now its the first day back to school and the first day facing him since.

hiding.☆

in which your boyfriend matt refuses to take pictures and when you try to take one he hides his face immediately.

oh wow.♡

in which you're in vegas with a friend not knowing matt also is and you could meet your boyfriend randomly despite being long distance.

why you mad?♡☆✿

in which you're mad at your boyfriend matt for making a joke you didn't particularly like so you give him the silent treatment all day.

mr grump.♡☆

in which matt is your boyfriend and you're complete opposites, your very positive and bright while he's always grumpy and in a mood.

new type of love.♡☆

in which you are left with some trauma after a past relationship but matt refuses to let it effect your relationship and is trying to help as best as he can.

she's the one.♡☆

in which you were warned about the hockey captain as soon as you entered your new school and you finally meet him when going to watch the team practice.

food tech.♡☆

in which you are in a food tech lesson and you're paired with matt, you both get given the task of dissecting a raw chicken.

red flags.♡☆✿

in which you're dating matt who has random mood swings with you and today you're hanging out with him and his brothers.

how do you feel?♡☆

in which matt wanted to wait to have kids but now u just found out ur pregnant young so u walk into his bedroom nervously to try tell him.

toxic? maybe.☆

in which matt is your on and off ex, you're both influencers and most your fandom know how often you break up and randomly get back together.

cute.☆

in which you and matt are the popular couple because of how 'cute' everyone thinks you are but actually your arguing a lot.

on and off.♡☆

in which you and matt are the on and off couple and everyone knows you'll be back together eventually especially with how much matt knows about you.

influence.♡

in which you are a popular influencer and you're finally meeting matt, the other popular content creator you've been talking to.

give my brother some.♡

in which your friend is going on a date with a guy from your school and she needs someone for his brother.

no. never.❄♡☆

in which matt is your dealer and he's been treating you like you're special so you test your luck by asking for harder drugs.

make a deal.☆

in which you're the cheer captain and matt's the lacrosse captain and you bump into him while you go to tell eachothers coach that you need the field this practice.

quiet.♡☆

in which you find the quiet boy quite interesting on your first day so you decide to sit with him. (inspired by the popular fic, quiet.)

quiet 2.♡☆

in which you find some sort of friendship within the quiet kid and you make sure he's okay as you take his belongings back. (longer version)

what are we?♡☆❄

in which you and matt are toxic because of the person he's become and you recently blocked him after you broke up yet again and he made a new number to contact you.

i want her.♡

in which matt is on tour with his brothers to meet his fans and you've caught matts eye while your waiting for your turn.

cheer up.❄♡

in which matt is a drug dealer who has a soft spot for you and you make it your goal to make sure he smiles more.

overthinking.☆

in which you go on your boyfriend, matt's phone only to find he's been texting other girls despite your overthinking and he gets out the shower.

its all fake.☆

in which matt, the popular boy blackmailed you, the quiet girl into fake dating him to prove to his parents he can keep a girl but you're not sure how long he plans for.

therapy.♡☆

in which you go to therapy and today you bring your boyfriend so your therapist thinks its time to discuss a topic you've been avoiding since you started going.

wisdom.♡

in which you go to get your wisdom teeth out and your boyfriend matt is there the whole time to comfort you despite you being emotional for no reason.

ouch.♡☆

in which matt has something against you forever for no reason but now he's climbing through your window injured.

ill never be like you.♡☆

in which you and matt are a couple despite your clear status differences and you're starting to let the comments of matt being 'too good' for you affect you.

long distance.♡

in which you and matt are in a long distance relationship and his parents suprise him with the gift of him finally meeting you.

halloween.☆✿

in which you come to a halloween party after moving schools and you see matt, your ex talking stage there.

go home. ❄♡

in which you share a dorm with matt who you've had a fight with before and when he's packing to go home for christmas break he realises you're not.

strangers.♡☆

in which matt is your deadbeat dad and today is your second attempt at meeting him after he didn't show up last time.

vampire.♡

in which matt is a vampire who hooks up with girls just for their blood but for some reason he can't bring himself to do it to you.

nervous?♡

in which matt is the quiet, smart kid who is now tutoring you to help you pass and when you dont go to school you think the session is off but matt is determined.

labour.☆✿

in which matt is your husband who isn't your biggest fan and definitely did not marry you for love, but for money and he expects too much from you.

it slipped.☆

in which matt is your boyfriend and he's working in his office while you're cleaning the house and you accidentally break one of his mums picture frames.

i saw it.♡☆

in which the triplets are your older brothers but matt seems to be the most observant and he saw how much you've been struggling.

force.

in which you and your boyfriend, matt are on the police force together and you've finally been let on a case as partners.

secret.♡

in which matt is in your friend group and you've become more civil after he defends you against the whole group when they randomly target you.

different mindset.♡☆

in which matt is your neighbour who likes to bother you any chance he gets but he's recently been enjoying being around you and is ready to make his move.

fan?♡

in which you're at your first big la influencer party and you see the currently popular triplets but one of them, matt has always caught your eye.

tired.♡☆

in which matt is your enemy but tonight you have to sleep in his room when staying over and he's not the happiest about it.

awkward.♡☆

in which your mum is a maid for matts family and today she needs some extra help so she's forcing you to help her despite your protests.

miss sunny.♡☆

in which matt is your grumpy, businessman boyfriend who has a soft spot for you because of how bright and happy you are and he's finally off his business trip.

you like me?♡

in which matt is a regular client at your tattoo and piercing shop and today he's booked an appointment for you to do it specifically.

not very welcoming.♡☆

in which matt is the closed off, grumpy guy but now he has no choice but to let someone new into his house.

shit. sorry.♡☆✿

in which matt is the jock dating the quiet girl but he likes trying to show off more then he likes making sure you're comfortable.

don't.♡☆

in which matt is your enemy who you, your friend and his brother decide you're all gonna test him while at dinner.

prank.♡

in which you and matt are a very liked internet couple and today you decide to play a few pranks on him to see how'll he'll react.

what's up?♡☆

in which you've completely changed from constantly yapping to being silent and just trying to get through the day.

podcast.♡

in which you're matts girlfriend and today you're a guest on his and his brothers podcast after becoming quite popular online.

are you done?☆

in which you're in science class and matt with his friends can't help but to take the piss out of the topic of the lesson.

she's up.♡

in which you and matt have a 2 year old and you're trying to get some rest before you take her to the beach you met at.

she's back.♡☆

in which you don't go to school in ages and when you do you're immediately stared at by everyone, especially matt.

q&a♡☆

in which you and matt have a daughter who does youtube and today shes doing 'asking my parents awkward questions'.

prom.♡☆

in which matt is your boyfriend and you've planned to go to prom together but now he hasn't spoke about it but you have to pick out your dress.

without me?♡☆

in which matt is your boyfriend and he's become very clingy to the point he's upset when you want to shower alone.

secrets.♡☆

in which your senior prom is coming up and you want to go with your boyfriend, matt but you still haven't told your overprotective mum about him.

how much aura?❄♡☆

in which matt is your fwb and you're complete opposites but today you're gonna play the tiktok game 'how much aura did i lose when..'

favourites.❄♡☆✿

in which matt is your dealer brother and he's the favourite even though you're a straight A student and he does drugs.

sunshine.♡☆

in which matt is your tall, grumpy boyfriend and you're the short, happy girlfriend and you're trying to get him to crack.

bestfriend.♡☆

in which matt is your bestfriend who has helped you through a lot and people keep telling you he likes you but you don't believe them.

finally finished this :)

i love this divider so much idec

taglist!

@bellaonthelow @hrtsdollie @moonk1ss3d @sturnclouds @christophersgf @ellizzyy @fratbrochrisgf @phoenix062 @pixxiies @conspiracy-ash @blahbel668 @monroesturnns @gwennybenny @sturnobsessedwh0re @xoxo4chrisss @pixie-sticks-are-good @wurlibydominicfike @anitahunt @ilusa @mattstrombolii @stvrlighht @asherrisrandom @lianomer @amelia-sturniolo3 @pvssychicken @owensbabygirl @ncm9696 @sturniolo-fann @watchu-mean-baby-keem @babyalliah-777 @imtheprett @coochiedestroyer1 @scarlettbitches @slutniolo @idkwhatthisis2009 @anabanabanana @chriscorqutte @slvttie-zx @hi-7-hi @sophand4n4

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angelsanarchy · 4 months ago

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Fever Dreams: Mike x Y/N One Shot Series PRT 19

Tagging: @icarus-star @chainsawgvtsfvck @romanroyapoligist @liquidsmoothdomme @madamemaximoff06 @drazenka @blacksoul-27 @444rockstargf @kappasbbgirl @luzclarita57 @tempt-ress @starry-eyed-wild-child

Mike walked into the garage with a huge shiner. He felt like shit, physically and mentally after last night. His head was pounding, his face hurt to the touch and he couldn't fight this dragging feeling of humiliation that he knew he was going to have to face.

"Fucking hell..." Sicky screwed up his face looking at Mike's bruised face.

"Yeah that sums up how I feel." Mike walked into the garage and Leff looked at him confused.

"What the hell happened to you?" Leff asked looking annoyed.

"He met Lisa last night at the bar." Sicky spoke up before Mike could and Leff shook his head.

"Why the hell would you take an escort home? What an idiot." Leff shook his head with a laugh. Mike looked down at his feet but jumped when the sound of the door to the shop slamming open against the wall as Y/n entered like hell on wheels startled him.

"Oh shit." Sicky said stepping away from Mike and Leff to get out of the way as she slammed a duffle bag on Leff's desk.

"What the fuck is all that?" He asked opening the bag to see money in stacks.

"I quit." She says walking over to a locker where she kept her things and pulling out two handguns and a few personal items.

"Where did you get all this?" Leff asked holding up the bag.

"It's what I owe you for the bar. It's mine now. I own it. That was the agreement. We're square and you can fuck off." She said keeping her back to him.

"For fucks sake Y/n, come back when you aren't on the fucking rag. I don't have time to deal with this today." Leff tossed the bag at her feet and she kicked it back at him causing the money to spill all over the floor.

"OH FUCK OFF YOU WEAK LITTLE BITCH." Y/n screamed. It was like time froze as Y/n screamed and Leff squared his shoulders at her like he was preparing for a fight.

"Keep running your mouth and you'll find yourself where I found you." Leff threatened.

"Oh please, as if anyone gives two shits what you think Leff. You're a drug dealer and a pusher. You think you've got pull like that anymore? The only reason people deal with you is because of my connection to you." Y/n said with a laugh.

"You think you're that hot shit huh? You think you run this shit?" Leff argued.

"No we all let you hold that title so you don't throw a tantrum. That's why you feel like you can dictate who can fuck, fight and profit around you. Your mommy issues show through every time I see you and it's [athetic." Leff made a move towards Y/n and Sicky stopped him.

"Whoa there mate." Sicky held onto Leff.

"You shut your whore mouth-"

"Or what Leff? I gave you the only thing tying me to you. We're done. You can run your own shit and manage your business without someone deflecting how much of a sad, lonely prick you are to the world." Y/n threw her bag over her shoulder.

"You wanna go and do it on your own? Fine! Get the fuck out and don't come back then bitch! You were useless anyway." Leff fought against Sicky's hold but he managed to keep him from stepping too closely to her. She walked past the two of them and saw Mike standing there in shock as he watched the scene. She winced slightly seeing his eye and then turned back to Leff and Sicky.

"You thought that was funny huh? Telling him I fucked a bunch of you guys like some common whore? Reminds me of the bastard who did the same to your sister." Y/n knew it was a low blow but it had to be said.

"GET THE FUCK OUT!" Leff yelled and Sicky was starting to struggle with him.

"You wanna be just like the son of a bitch who killed Molly then you go ahead. You're heading in that direction anyway but I refuse to be the one taking the bullet for you." Y/n gritted out.

"TAKE OFF Y/N. Now..." Sicky raised his voice and tilted his head at her and she finally walked past Mike and left the garage. Leff shoved Sicky off of him and started pacing back and forth.

"Did that cunt do that to your eye? Tell me Mike!" Leff growled

"Leff, you need to calm down." Sicky tried to get him to breathe but he started tearing up the shop.

"You should take off kid. I got him." Sicky looked at Mike who stood there surprised that things had escalated like they had. Leff was losing his mind and Y/n had said a few things that had him thinking. What did she mean about the guy who killed his mom? Did she know the guy? Did Leff? He was confused and his headache was pounding now.

All he wanted to do was talk to Y/n even if she hated him.

#Fever Dreams #Fever Dreams series #One Shot Series #Film: 5lbs of Pressure #5lbs of Pressure #Mike #Mike x Y/n #Rory Culkin #Culkin Cult

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aquarri · 1 year ago

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Coworker Fics

- Love Is A Rebellious Bird by 100percentsassy and gloria_andrews (134,891 words)

AU in which the boys still make music. Louis is the concertmaster of the London Symphony Orchestra, Harry is the New! and Exciting! interim conductor/ex-cello prodigy who "has made Mozart cool again" according to Esquire Magazine (Louis hates him immediately, which is definitely why he internet stalked him in his dark bedroom late at night that one time), and Niall is the best. Zayn and Liam are around too.

Don't hum Bolero.

- Felt Nothing Like Home by QuickedWeen (61,574 words)

The Bon Appétit YouTube channel has become an unexpected success partly due to the newest series developed by classically trained pastry chef Harry Styles who is intent on making the art of baking accessible to the masses. He and his best friend Louis Tomlinson have been with the magazine for years and they’re unused to the level of online fame they’ve suddenly achieved. It’s easy for Harry to brush it off and ignore it (despite the teasing they get around the test kitchen) because Louis is happily married and has been for years—since just before they met for the first time. Or, it was easy to brush it off, but at the beginning of the summer, just as they’re leading up to the stress of planning the annual holiday issue, Louis and his husband decide to file for divorce.

- A+ For Effort by embro (7,475 words)

Harry is the music teacher and Louis is the P.E. teacher and there's a whole lot of crushing going on.

- Teach Me Your Ways by elsi_bee (34,204 words)

Based on the following prompt: Omega Harry is the newly appointed sex ed teacher and uptight Alpha Louis does not approve of his very open methods. A rivalry ensues until Harry unravels him behind closed doors.

- Take Me Higher Than I've Ever Been by crimsontheory (51,158 words)

Harry is pretty simple. He goes to work everyday, comes home, then watches Netflix with his cat. And if he happens to have a tiny little crush on his coworker, then that’s just his own business.

[Or the one where Harry and Louis work together and Louis starts to notice Harry back. Featuring a wedding, a sassy cat, and first times.]

- turn any corner, there's something new by balanceds (12,944 words)

AU. After graduating from uni with his degree in Costume Design, Harry Styles is finally ready to start as a dresser on his first real West End show. Nothing can get in his way.

- The Games We Play by Wishingforloushair (50,078 words)

Harry Styles is a good agent. He’s sure of it. But his track record in MI6 leaves something to be desired. Presented with his big break, an undercover mission to take down one of the biggest arms dealers in England, he’s ready to prove himself to everyone. But his plans are quickly foiled by discovering who his undercover partner is: Louis Tomlinson, the agent Harry has had a rivalry with since Basic Training. Effortlessly put together, quick tongued, and ready to dive into action, Louis is everything Harry’s not, and when he realises the details of the operation involve them needing to present as a married couple, Harry seriously wonders what he’s done in a past life to be cursed like this. Through rivalry, fear, and hope, the pair untangle a complicated web of lies that threatens to shake the very foundations of the Agency.

- Please Tell Me That You've Got Me by ColorfulSuitmoon (20,652 words)

Or a world where the nickname your soulmate will call you appears on your chest on your 18th birthday and Harry wakes up with the only name he hates.

- Caffeine Withdrawals by corrinebailey (67,635 words)

Or the one where Harry can't fall asleep, he wants to hate his coworker, and Louis might be the one to solve everything

"Superior" Louis

- Take My Breath Away by RealityBetterThanFiction (153,658 words)

There is a prestigious school in the British Royal Navy classified as Premier Delta - or as it is known by its flyers, 1D. These select pilots are an elite set of Naval lieutenants who are trained in the skill of aggressive aerial combat. They are instruments of war, trained in times of peace. They are dogfighters, relentless and fearless in their mission to protect their beloved country. From their lofty vantage, they are always watching, waiting, and ready to lay it all on the line.

Lt. Harry Styles, call sign Sparrow, is a prodigy when it comes to flying. The owner of an unrivaled Naval pedigree, being a pilot was always written in the stars for Harry. With his trusty RIO, Lt. Niall Horan, Harry has made an unprecedented ascension in the ranks of the Naval aerial combat elite, and has been recruited to the esteemed Premier Delta flight school, carrying on his family’s legacy. What he finds there are unexpected friendships, perilous challenges, and something beyond what he ever thought possible. Because as his father had always told him, before the great Captain Styles went tragically missing in combat, you don’t fall in love with the sky, you fall in love with what keeps you on the ground.

- Don’t Look Down by zarah5 (91,709 words)

AU. In which Louis is a solicitor at one of London’s most prestigious law firms and Harry happens to apply for the position as his trainee. And everyone else is around, too.

- you are my destiny (you are the reason that i still believe) by alwaysxlarrie (98,007 words)

Being a new employee at a company means that you have to learn to brush off the shitty bosses, shitty coworkers, and not getting the credit you actually deserve for things. At least, that's been Harry Styles' experience. Coworkers who steal his ideas in pursuit of getting praise and a raise, and a boss who's indifferent at best and condescending at worst. Harry has learned to expect this reality for the foreseeable future. He's accepted it.

What he hadn't expected was for Louis Tomlinson to waltz into their company, and his life, and change around everything he thought he knew about fate.

- The Prophecy by HoPotato (18,717 words)

CEO of Empyrean, Louis Tomlinson should have all that he can wish for. After inheriting his mother's company, everyone might think the most eligible alpha cannot wish for anything else but in reality he lives in a glass cage, crushing under the weight of dreams that aren't his and the ghoul of the life he never had. What changes everything for him is a simple resignation letter from his personal assistant on his desk on one fine morning.

#fics #fic rec

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nemesyaaa · 1 month ago

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oh PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ??? LORD ???? that was fucking amazing and wow i'm just speechless ?? it was feeling like watching a show ?? BUT ALL THE EMOTIONS OMGG ?? RAFE PISSED ME OFF. DON'T EVEN FUCKING STARTING ME WITH JILLIAN LMFAOOO. THEM BOTH I WANT TO CRASH THEM. AND IF I CATCH YOU RAFE CAMERON, YOU BETTER RUN.

TYSM FOR MAKING KELCE NOT SUCH A ASSHOLE. BC I FEEL LIKE KELCE IS NOT A BAD FRIEND. LESS THAN TOPPER AT LEAST. WANT TO THROW RAFE'S CAP IDK WHERE BUT OMGG WAS SO GOOD 😭😭💖 I ENJOYED THIS TOO MUCH I FEAR. AND THE LITTLE BACKSTORY PART ?? TYSM FOR INTRODUCING US SO WELL IN THAT UNIVERSE. I WAS SO EXCITED FOR THIS ONE

“I thought he was on archery duty,” Kie mumbles as you look down from the lifeguard tower on the 6’2” nightmare of a man strutting toward the water. He sets the whistle in his mouth, hands resting on his toned hips, his stupid backward cap on his perfectly quaffed head of hair. Rafe motherfucking Cameron. — LMDAOOO HIS STUPID BACKWAED CAP. THIS IS TOO REAL IM SCREAMING 😭😭😭😭💀

This is where I go to find peace. Where I go to make a little extra cash for the summer. Camp Salem is mine, and it always has been. Rafe’s whistle screams through the noise, making all heads turn to him just like he likes. Always and forever the center of attention. “No roughhousin’. Aight? I’m not gonna rescue your ass. If you drown, you drown,” he barks, fishing a fresh spliff out from behind his ear, replacing it with his whistle. — WHY HE'S ALREADY BARKING ?? BRO IS THE BEGINNING. SAVE YOUR RUDENESS.

“What the hell is he doing?” You scoff in disbelief as he lights up a smoke in front of the kids. You hear a wolf whistle come from the woods. Rafe turns over his shoulder with a smile, ignoring the swimmers as he watches Kelce and Topper hike toward the shore with a cooler. — PLEASE. SOMEONE FIRE HIM.

”Shut the fuck up,” he stops you before you can even start chewing him out, pointing his big fingers and lit joint up at you before taking another drag. “M’fuckin’ thirsty. Okay? It’s 100 fuckin’ degrees, princess. Have some goddamn compassion,” he taunts through a thick cloud of smoke, catching a beer as Kelce lofts it in the air, the brunette quickly cracking it open. — THE PRINCESS NICKNAME....IM SORRY, BUT IT'S KINDA HOT THERE ???

“If you've got shit to say, you can say it to my face... Ya know, scratch that. I vividly remember tellin’ you to shut the fuck up.” Your mouth falls open in disgust, the sour expression on your face making him smile smugly. “You hear me that time, or are you hard of hearin’, sweet cheeks?” — SWEET CHEEKS ???? CRYING 😭😭🥹

"Hard to watch," Kie continues mockingly. "You know… I know Rafe all too well. That's Sarah’s older brother. He’s a mess, y/n. A literal walking red flag: drug dealer, cliché frat boy douchebag, daddy issues up the ass, sex addict… A fuck boy, at the very least. Are you sure you even wanna mess with that?” She looks back at you in disdain that you even showed the slightest bit of attraction in the first place. — MASSIVE RED FLAG. LMFAOOO SHE'S NOT TENDER WITH HIM. SHE'S RUINING ALL HIS CHANCES 💀💀

“You gave him “the eyes”,” she knocks. “You like him, which is fine, I guess… He’s just gonna be a fuckin’ problem for you. A big problem. HUGE. Mark my words. You did not choose an easy one.” — NOT THE ONLY THING THAT'S HUGE ABOUT HIM I BELIEVE...

"Oh, hey," Rafe whispers, not the least bit concerned about class starting. You look over at him, catching his flirty smile as he fishes his phone out of his pocket. “Before I forget again. Can I get your number?” — BROOOO IS VERY FAST WTFFFF

Fuck, she’s hot. And she knows it, too. Those legs, that dress, those fuckin' tits… She sneaks little glances at me out of the corner of her eye, positioning her body to get even closer. She’s a good girl. So damn good. I can tell she's a sweetheart. She’s gotta be a virgin… Or is she? Either way, I can’t wait to show her a thing or two. I’m gonna ruin this girl. It’s been a week since I saw her last. I was hopin’ I’d see her on campus, get her number, set somethin’ up. Shit… This is the best case scenario. — THIS IS WHY I LOVE RAFE'S POV SO MUCH. LIKE YES, TELL ME WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT ME

“By who?” I mock him, scowling in disgust. “You that dumb?”“No shit she's hot.” I scoff as I stand up, heading out before any of the boys can catch up with me. “Stay in your fuckin’ lane, bitch.” — TOPPER AND RAFE ARGUING IS SO FUNNY TO ME PLEASE

"I really like you," he hums. “Fuck. I like you a lot, princess.” — WOZOKSSLIEIZOSZ PLEASE STOOPP 😵😵😵🙂‍↕️

“What? Did you want more?” He asks as his big hand slips under your sweatshirt, tracing your lower back. — OK, I'M DOWN BAD FOR THIS MAN.

I don't want to be casual. I don't want to be one of “his girls”. Kie said he has daddy issues… Maybe that's why he’s too afraid to commit to us—to me. — PLEASE CASUAL BY CHAPELL ROAN.

Every night I’m pulling myself away right before I take it any further just waiting for his actions to match his words. But it’s getting harder… It’s next to impossible to push aside my urges. I've touched his body; felt the deep ridges of his abs under his shirt, the muscles of his broad chest pressed against the palms of my hands. I've stroked his thick cock over his grey sweats, sucking his tip through the fabric, getting us both off just grinding on his lap alone. — FUCK, HE'S TOO SEXY. I GASPED MAN.

“Just frat stuff, princess. M’sorry,” he mutters. “Just focus on us. Yeah?” — HE'S SO SWEET IN A WAY 😮‍💨😮‍💨

"I'll talk to him later, princess.""Take. It." — LMFAOO READER IS IN COMMAND

"I'm so fuckin' done, Rafe. Just - Fuck! Just leave me alone!" You hiss. — TELL HIM.

“Shit, y/n. She’s - She's just a friend, baby. Yeah, we fuck. But, she means nothing to me. Nothing. And, I mean nothing to her I swear. C’mon. You're my girl. Just stop.” — WHAT A PATHETIC MAN.

“Don’tchu think you're overreacting a little bit?” He drawls. His question setting you off further. — I HATE HIM. I HATE MEN.

"Shit! Fuck. Just stop. It’s not all my fault. Okay? You - You can’t keep acting like you’re acting either. I had no clue if you really liked me or not. I didn’t think you were actually gonna fuck me. You’re teasing me, you're a fuckin’ tease, y/n. Always keeping me on the edge. I have needs-” — SLAP HIM PLEASE. SLAP HIM.

“What? I’m not teasing you, Rafe. And needs? We’ve only been talking for a month. A MONTH! I know you have needs. So do I. But it’s hard to let myself go around you and take it to the next level when you’re always looking around for the next best thing. Because if you were all in, Rafe, your needs would have been met week one.” — YES, TELL HIM READER 😡😡😡😡

“Yeah? Well, you're actin’ like a fuckin’ bitch.” — IM DONE WITH HIM.

I don't deserve y/n, and I never have. I fuckin’ hate myself. — YES. NOT GONNA HAVE PITY FOR YOU, RAFE.

"I was going to try… I was gonna try to make things right today. I just needed you to calm down. Jesus. You’re not even givin’ me a chance" — REMEBER WHEN I SAID IM DONE WITH HIM ?? STILL FUCKING DONE.

"What's that now?" He gasps dramatically, turning on his heels fast, looking at you wide-eyed. "You want me to fuck your ass, princess?" His sleazy frat boy laugh fills your ears. "Didn't see that comin'. Did you, Kelce?” — OH SOMEONE SHOOT ME BECAUSE I HAVE SUCH A PATHETIC RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS MAN WHO LOVE TO PLAY WITH MY FEELINGS 🫡🫡🫡

"Literally, the opposite of that,” he laughs, making Topper do the same. “I agree with everything Top said, bud. You ruined a good thing. N’for who?” He adds in a condescending tone, referencing the girls I usually bag—a direct shot at Jillian Tate. — KELCE 🫶🏿🫶🏿🫶🏿🫶🏿🫶🏿🫶🏿‼️

“𝐂𝐚𝐦𝐩 𝐊𝐢𝐥𝐥” - 𝐀 𝐑𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐂𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 | 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟏 𝐨𝐟 𝟑

+18 𝓜𝓲𝓷𝓸𝓻 𝓓𝓝𝓘

𝙱𝚞𝚕𝚕𝚢𝙵𝚛𝚊𝚝!𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚡 𝚂𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛

𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒: 𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 | 𝐆𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 | 𝐏𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐞 | 𝐒𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐤

*total fic is 15K - dropping daily

6.8K <- the first chapter is the longest 🩷

𝓇𝒶𝒻𝑒𝓎𝓈𝒸𝓊𝓇𝓉𝒶𝒾𝓃𝒷𝒶𝓃𝑔𝓈 𝓀𝒾𝓃𝓀𝓉𝑜𝒷𝑒𝓇 - 𝓌𝑒𝑒𝓀 𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑒𝑒

𝖒𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙/𝖘𝖈𝖍𝖊𝖉𝖚𝖑𝖊

⚠️warnings contain spoilers⚠️

Mean!Rafe, Bully!Rafe, bulling, Rafe is an ass, name calling, degredation, swearing, drinking, smoking, drug usage, kissing, praise, size kink, unprotected sex, oral (female receiving), oral (male receiving), rough oral, multiple orgasms, spanking, violence, fighting, ownership kink, pet names, multiple POVs, violence, gore, horror, stalking, blood mentioned, gaslighting, lovers to enemies to lovers, reader is quick to forgive, mentions of mutual masterbation, teasing, cheating

𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓬𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓑𝓪𝓬𝓴𝓼𝓽𝓸𝓻𝔂: Sweetheart!Reader isn’t from the OB. She met Kiara (roomate) at college and quickly became friends with the Pogues. The group decided to join the reader, working at Camp Salem which she attended every summer since she was little. After junior high she became a camp counselor herself. Sweetheart!Reader is just that, a sweetheart. She’s a lover-girl and quick to forgive. She’s hard to read regarding her sexual experience—her sweetness is irresistible to Rafe. He fantasizes about corrupting her and stripping her of that. Sweetheart!Reader wears her heart on her sleeve, making her the perfect target for her bully, Rafe Cameron.

𝓡𝓪𝓯𝓮’𝓼 𝓑𝓪𝓬𝓴𝓼𝓽𝓸𝓻𝔂: Canon-wise this Rafe is the closest to Season 1 Rafe. He is the definition of touch starved, touched but untouched, craving intimacy because it makes him feel better, even if it's just for a few moments. The only awful thing he did in his past in this AU is to be an asshole to the Pogues. He and the Kook trio are serving community service hours assigned from the university at Camp Salem after getting in trouble for something at the end of the last school year (undisclosed drinking violation). This being something they couldn’t pay their way out of.

Reader’s POV:

“Him and JJ wouldn't stop arguing… Mrs. Mazie was worried one of them would…” You let your voice trail away as you mimic drawing the bow back, shooting and arrow straight at Rafe.

“Fair. That tracks,” Kiara laughs weakly—nothing surprising either of you anymore.

“What do you think’s in there?” Kiara groans, but you both know the answer. Beer.

“Rafe, are you kiddin-”

“Isn’t this the kinda shit that got him in trouble in the first place?” You backchat to Kie, catching Rafe’s ears as well.

“The fuck you talkin’ out of your ass for like you know me. Huh?” He spits.

“I was talkin’ to Kie.”

“Loud n’ clear,” you sigh and roll your eyes away, returning your attention to the water to do his job.

“Rafe,” Kelce calls out, taking a few steps back with the football. Rafe runs closer to shore, right in your line of sight, slamming the rest of his beer as he runs. He crushes the can in his fist before catching the ball, making the two boys whistle and cheer.

“Your can, Rafe,” Kiara scolds pointing to the litter wedged in the sand.

“Think you got it, Kie,” he taunts, leaving it behind for Kiara to clean up out of spite. She flips him the bird, crossing her arms tightly over her chest, grumbling something about him being a useless asshole.

Why is he so fucking awful?

𝐹𝓁𝒶𝓈𝒽𝒷𝒶𝒸𝓀…

"Do you know where you're going?" You whisper out of the corner of your mouth, grabbing the door for Kiara. The two of you press through the university doors, walking with the flow of traffic.

"No fuckin' clue," she chuckles. "I don't remember shit from orientation."

"Neither do I," you sigh, adjusting your book bag strap nervously.

"Hi, y/n." The sound of his voice sends you into a tailspin. Your breath hitches; heart, racing wildly.

Holy shit. Holy shit. Relax. Just relax. "Hi, Rafe," you smile, looking toward his deep voice, but he’s already down the hall, lost in a crowd of frat boys, vanishing behind the lecture hall doors.

"That was... Well... Umm-" Your roommate teases.

"Shut up-”

“All I said was ‘he was cute,’” you correct her, ambling toward the same lecture hall as Rafe, feeling your excitement rise.

"Yeah… Sure”

“What does that mean?” You scoff.

“I didn’t choose anyone…”

“Yeah? Well he chose you,” she adds cautiously as you walk through the doors, the two of you matching Rafe’s baby blues—the man clearly waiting to catch your eye again. The two of you walk toward the group of frat boys sprawled out in the back. Rafe slaps the guys next to him, whispering something that has them pushing down a couple seats.

Rafe’s gaze trails up your body as smirk rolls across his lips. Holy shit. You swallow hard, feeling your cheeks warm up. “Hi, Rafe," you breathe.

"Hey, Y/n," he welcomes you warmly.

"Can I sit here?"

”’Course you can,” Topper jumps into your conversation, speaking before Rafe can. Rafe furrows his brows, his glare cutting over to his friend. Jealousy? Maybe he’s interested. You take a seat in a desk, Rafe quickly adjusts to move a little closer, his muscular arm skimming yours.

“You settling in, sweetheart?” Sweetheart? Sweetheart. Me? Rafe gives you a sinful smile before wetting his plump bottom lip. He shifts slightly, letting his knee-graze yours as well. You hadn't seen him in a week. He was on campus helping his sister move into the dorms, sweetly offering to help you carry in your largest box when he saw you struggling in the stairwell. It was a small gesture, but honestly you've thought about it ever since.

“I am. Thank you,” you smile, going to speak again but you’re cut off by your professor's voice booming through the room.

“Mhmm.” is all you can manage as you fumble for your phone and your words.

"You comin’ by the frat on Friday?"

“Friday? Yeah. Sure… Is there a party?”

“Yeah. First week of school. Of course, there’s a party. We should get together before then, though. What are you doin’ tonight?"

Tonight? "Oh. I-”

"I can stop by your dorm?" You feel his touch again as his rough finger brushes your thigh ever so slightly. “Just to hang out. We can relax, watch a movie, get to know each other better," he rasps. “Nothin’ more. Aight? I can tell you’re nervous, princess. I don’t wanna make you nervous,” he assures. Damn, that sounds like a lie, leaving his lips. His perfect fucking lips.

Damn… I'm in trouble.

“I’d love that.”

Rafe’s POV:

Atta girl.

Finally… I look up at the clock as it ticks to the top of the hour. I watch as she stands up from her seat, her little dress catching on her upper thighs. “I’ll see you later, Rafe,” she coos. “Nice to meet you, Topper.” She brushes her dress down, skirt shifting over her ass as she walks. Ugh, she's fuckin’ mine.

“Nice meetin’ you too, sweetheart.” Topper calls and I roll my eyes.

“Can you not read the room, Thornton. She’s taken,” I gloat as I watch her and Kie walk toward the steps. She glances back at me, giving me a wordless invitation. You want me to chase you, princess. I can do that.

“Taken? By who?”

“By who?” I mock him, scowling in disgust. “You that dumb?”

“Damn, she’s sexy,” Topper sighs blissfully, ignoring me completely, just provoking me. I throw my elbow at him, catching him in the gut.

“The fuck did I say?” I snap through a raspy laugh letting only a fraction of my annoyance bleed through. “Stop pushin’ me, Top.”

“M’just sayin’,” he laughs as he gathers his things too.

“No shit she's hot.” I scoff as I stand up, heading out before any of the boys can catch up with me. “Stay in your fuckin’ lane, bitch.”

"Where are you off to, Cameron?" Topper yells through the lecture hall.

"Guess, buddy,” I smirk at him before passing through the doors. Y/n seperates from Kiara. Thank, god. She looks from the left to the right, settling on the right. "Wrong way, sweetheart," I call. Y/n turns on her heels, the corners of her pouty lips curling into a smile. "You're looking for your next class. Yeah? Freshman math?”

"Mhmm. Yeah... Will you help me?" She questions. "I don't remember anything from orientation."

"Of course," I smile warmly as she looks up at me. "You know the professor’s name?”

“Shell-Shell something….”

“Shellenberger.”

“I think so.”

“Well, sweetheart. I think you're right. Stupid fuckin’ name. How are you supposed to remember that shit? Huh?” I laugh lightly, making her return a giddy, nervous giggle in agreement. She pulls out her schedule and I bite back a smile as I watch the paper quiver slightly in her trembling hand. “Mhmm… Over here." I rest my hand on the small of her back, guiding her in the right direction.

"Shit," she grumbles, tossing her gaze down in defeat. "I'm such a freshman.”

"Nothin’ wrong with that. You’ll figure it out," I breathe, brushing my hand lightly over the top of hers. Y/n takes a little breath, biting her glossy bottom lip between her teeth at the slightest bit of contact between the two of us. Shit. She’s stunning…

We round the corner, stepping toward her next class. “Well thank you, Rafe,” she smiles as she steps away again but I reach out for her hand, leading her back to me.

“You got a few minutes?” I ask, my question making her beautiful eyes sparkle as her body pulls closer and closer as I take the opportunity to lead her away from the crowd. "It’s been like, what, a week? I’ve been thinkin’ about you a lot,” I mumble. She takes a little breath, trying to think of something to say but she’s a little too flustered. “You're beautiful.” I lose her completely as she glances away bashfully before returning her eyes to mine.

"Thank you, Rafe," she murmurs. Shit. I can get used to that... My name sounds so good on her lips.

"So, am I gonna get you alone tonight?" I ask, making her eyes widen and flutter.

“Oh. Umm… Yeah. I think I can talk Kie into leaving,” she whispers delightedly.

"That’s great news, sweetheart. Just perfect," I smile as I rest my hand against the wall, moving nearer, giving us a little more privacy. “I’d ask you to come to the frat house but it’s pretty crazy right now. And I think Top has a crush on you too. Can’t have that...”

She scrunches her cute nose, clearly uninterested in him, still playing sweet regardless. “I think he was just bein’ nice.”

“Nah… You shoulda heard him talkin’ about you when you left. I mean he’s my buddy, but the guy’s a dog. Ya know?”

”Really?”

”Mhmm… Don’t worry. I had your back. Thornton’s a dick… I set him straight.”

”Thank you,” she smiles sweetly.

“‘Course. Well, I’ll see you tonight. Hmm?” I ask, watching as her smile creeps a little wider as she hugs her books a little tighter.

“See you tonight.”

Reader’s POV:

Your mind starts to race as the movie continues, each passing minute drawing the two of you closer and closer. Rafe smirks down at you, watching your cozy shorts ride up on your thigh as you move your leg just over the top of his. His large, ringed hand traces over your skin, gripping you tight.

The night’s played out like a game of checkers; Rafe, waiting on you to make your move before he made his next, careful to not skip ahead or go too far. He’s been nothing but a gentleman, but that hunger inside you wishes he would just push all that aside. Should I just go for it? I can’t help but get caught up staring at his lips. Kissing on the first night… Is that too forward? Damn. I don’t think I’ve focused on a second of this movie.

The scenes blur together, your thoughts flurry your mind as your heart pounds louder than the sound of the movie. The rapid beating thumps in your ears, embarrassingly so. You look up at him, wondering if he hears it as well, but he smiles at you sweetly. “You alright, princess,” Rafe asks, his voice deep and husky, making your stomach flutter at the sound. Just go for it... If you don’t do it now, you'll regret it. I’ve heard the way the girls on campus talk about him—seen the way they look at him. If I sit here and do nothing, he’s gonna find someone who will…

You sling your leg over fully, taking a seat on Rafe’s lap as your sexual tension boils over. It’s like he was already waiting, his large arm quickly wraps around your waist, pulling you even closer, his other hand drifts into your hair, twisting in your strands, taking you by surprise when his lip crash into yours. You gasp; lips parting slightly, letting Rafe’s tongue slips between, making all your tension melt away.

You match his pace, slowing down with him, savoring the feeling of his soft lips against yours. A low groan escapes him, landing on yours lips, sending chills down to your spine, straight to your throbbing core. Rafe pulls back slightly, leaving you panting, searching for him. “Fuck, Rafe," you breathe in a voice you've never used before as he latches onto your neck; sucking, licking, bitting, making you tilt your head back. He chuckles sinfully against your skin, lighting you on fire before softening his touch completely, working his way back up to your mouth. His kiss-swollen lips ghost over the top of yours, brushing softly.

"I really like you," he hums. “Fuck. I like you a lot, princess.”

"I like you too, Rafe."

”You do?” He croons, the timbre of his voice torturing you.

”I do,” you whisper as you fingers scratch into the hair at the nape of his neck, subtly pulling him in but he hangs back.

"It’s late. What is it? 2 am?" Rafe smiles against your mouth, teasing you shamelessly. He knows exactly what you want but he’s holding true to most of his word from the earlier in the day. “I said we were just hangin’ out, baby. We already went too far…”

“You’re teasing me,” you whisper.

“What? Did you want more?” He asks as his big hand slips under your sweatshirt, tracing your lower back.

“I do,” you whisper needily.

“Mmm’guess, we’re just gonna have to get together tomorrow. Huh?”

“No. I-” You answer quickly. “No…”

“No?” He bullies you, giving you that old money laugh. “You don’t wanna hang out with me, sweetheart?” Rafe whispers warmly against your hot skin.

“You know what I mean,” you sigh, finding yourself at the crossroads between frustration and lust, completely dizzy with the thought of him. Fully consumed in Rafe Cameron. Every part of you wanting every piece of him.

“Tomorrow?”

"Tomorrow," you sigh.

It’s only been a month but, fuck, it feels like longer. I’ve gotten to see him interact with his frat brothers and other girls and it just feels different. He’s so cold and gruff but when he’s around me it’s like that icy exterior melts away. It’s addicting getting to see this side of him— like it’s reserved for me and only me.

There are moments, though… moments where I question if I’m all he wants. I mean, I can tell he likes me, but it’s almost like he’s keeping other girls on standby just in case. Whenever I see him in the hall, he’s always stepping away from a conversation with a different girl or setting his phone face down on the desk before I take a seat… And, it’s moments like that where I get more and more unsure…

Rafe can see it too. I swear he can hear what I’m thinking because he’s quick to assure me I'm way off the mark. He says all the right things, swearing up and down that he’s only interested in me. It’s hard to deny that way he looks at me—the way he touches me: tender and rough, ebbing and flowing between the two leaving me like putty in hands. It’s hard to deny that fact when our talks get deeper and deeper. He confides in me. He tells me things I have to promise not to tell anyone else. I can see him letting his guard down. He’s a very different Rafe than the world knows. He’s my Rafe.

I don't want to be casual. I don't want to be one of “his girls”. Kie said he has daddy issues… Maybe that's why he’s too afraid to commit to us—to me.

Maybe that next level of intamacy is the connection we need. Maybe sex is all it’ll take. I'm not a virgin. What am I holding out for anyways? Maybe if I give him what I know he wants he’ll be all in. I want him—but I want to feel secure. I want his eyes to stop wandering. I want to be everything he wants. I just don't think I am.

BEEP. BEEP.

You look out your dorm room window as Rafe leans out of his truck with a smile, beckoning you to come outside. You gather your things, running down the stairwell, before making your way out the front door. Rafe’s eyes rake over your body, taking in the view as you walk toward his ride.

He hops out just before you make your way there, pulling you into his arms, looking down at you with a smile. “Damn, you look so fuckin’ pretty,” he praises breathlessly, leaning in for a kiss, claiming your lips. Butterflies swirl in your stomach, tummy fluttering with excitement. You smile against his lips, breathing a similar sentiment against his, praising how handsome he looks in his crisp white shirt and jeans. “Thank you, princess. You ready to get outta here?” He asks, popping open his passenger’s door, taking your overnight bag off your hands, helping you inside.

His smile widens a little more as you silently set the plans, you, having no intentions of going home as you usually do. He trots around to the driver’s side, a little more pep in his step, tossing your bag in the back before turning the key. “You stayin’ with me tonight, princess?” Rafe asks, through a boyish smile he’s trying his best to contain. Your heart sings seeing him this excited. Maybe I was right.

You roll up to the frat. The large mini mansion flooded with people inside and out, music pouring from the windows and open doors. It’s a madhouse. Rafe chuckles, looking out onto the mess. Just another weekend… “You ready?” He asks as he turns his head to the side, tilting it slightly as his smiles.

“M’ready.”

Rafe helps you out of the car, walking hand-and-hand with you inside the space. Cigarette and weed smoke hangs heavy in the air, mixing with the sticky sweetness of cheap liquor. Rafe walks through the party, greeting the masses as he passes brother after brother, the two of you moving deeper and deeper into the party. He lifts your bag by the strap, gesturing to ask if you want to put this in his room. You nod and smile knowing that there’s no chance you’re leaving if he gets his way.

The two of you walk up the stairs, stepping down the hall, excitement rising as you get closer and closer until he pushes through his bedroom door. As soon as it opens, it shuts again; Rafe backing you against the entry, slamming his lips against yours, wanting nothing more than his mouth on yours. He lifts you into his strong arms, deepening the kiss; the two of you quickly finding your tempo.

Rafe pulls you off the wall, walking with you to his bed, laying you down on top. He grabs the back of his baseball cap, pulling it off his head before tossing it to the side, quickly tearing his shirt away. Your eyes widen at the sight of his broad, bare chest, fully exposed. His gold chain glints with his quickened breathing—his toned abs, and deep v-lines kiss the band of his Calvin Klein boxer, poking out of his jeans. He crawls toward you, rolling his big body into yours, crushing you under his weight as he kisses you again, grinding at the perfect cadence. You whimper into your kiss, making him moan into your parted mouth.

DING.

Rafe pulls away from your kiss, grabbing his phone out of his back pocket, eyeing the screen before setting it down on his nightstand. You look back up at him, Rafe not missing a beat, his lips quickly greeting yours again. His tongue slides between your lips, reeling with yours, making you feel like you could float away.

DING. DING. DING.

You're pulled back to reality, stomach plunging as Rafe gets back-to-back notifications. He starts to kiss you a little deeper, your attention obviously getting pulled elsewhere, going out of his to bring your focus back to him, biting your lip and squeezing your hip, whispering sweet-nothings to cloud your thoughts.

DING.

“Rafe…” You sigh, unable to concentrate.

“Just frat stuff, princess. M’sorry,” he mutters. “Just focus on us. Yeah?”

DING.

“Can you at least put it on silent?” You clip as you grab for his phone, catching a name.

Jilly Tate

Jillian? As in Delta Gamma Jillian? You look up at Rafe uneasily. He takes his phone back, flicking the device on silent before returning to your lips.

“Stop,” you whisper.

“What? Why?” He asks dumbly, like he doesn’t already know you know something’s up, continuing to kiss the corner of your lips and cheek as he reaches over, setting his phone down. Without thinking you reach for it, snagging it off the nightstand before opening up his messages. “What are you doin’?” He huffs like he’s got something to hide.

And he does.

Jilly Tate: Rafey

Jilly Tate: Are you partying tonight?

Jilly Tate: Rafe Cameron??

Jilly Tate: you better not be busy again

Jilly Tate: I’m gonna need you to convince me to get out of bed

Jilly Tate: you better make it worth my while?

Jilly Tate: Maybe you need some motivation.

You look up at him as he looks down at you uneasily, not knowing what you’re reading, just knowing who it’s from. He can see the sadness in your eyes, letting him know that it’s most likely not something you weren’t meant to see. You flick your franic finger fast scrolling a little higher, catching pages and pages of messages populating from this week and last

"So, are you… Are you hanging out with Jillian too?" You force the words past your lips, trying to remain as unbothered as possible.

"Yeah, Y/n. Nothing there. Just friends. I swear." Just friends... That doesn’t look like just friends. "Y/n... you okay, baby?" He asks, knowing full-well you aren’t.

"Uh, yeah-yeah. I'm alright," you lie as you look at his phone, watching as three little dots appear, a new message forming from Jillian.

Goddamit, Rafe. You shut your eyes softly, doing your best not to cry as you see the image: blonde curls, piled in a messy bun, pouted lips, and bedroom eyes. A mirror selfie on her bed. Just Rafe’s oversized frat T-shift and a barely-there thong swallowed up by her perfect ass. "Sweetheart?" He asks again, his voice a little more unsure than the first time.

"Yeah."

"You okay?"

Fuck off... Absolutely not. Yet another message rolls in. Rafe’s eyes tighten to yours. "Calm down, Rafe. It’s Topper," you mutter.

"He’s probably just wonderin’ where I’m at, baby.”

Fuck that. You open the message, typing a ‘call me’ reply before taking it off silent, setting it down on the bed before looking up at Rafe; your frusterstion peaked. The tears you’re trying to contain haze your eyes. Rafe clearly has something going on with Jillian. Even if I'm somehow mistaken, he's still getting text— still getting together with her, still getting sexts.

RING. RING. RING.

"Take it,” you whisper.

"I'll talk to him later, princess."

"Take. It."

"Y/n. I-"

CLICK.

Rafe’s eyes double as you make the decision for him, hitting the accept button, putting it on speaker as well. You lift an eyebrow in his direction, challenging him to speak.

"Uh... Umm. Hey, Top."

"Yo. You comin’ or what? Where are you?" He yells over the party downstairs.

"M’up in my room. I’ll be down in a few minutes. I gotta go, man."

"Wait a second... Are you with Jillian?"

"Holy shit," you respire, pinching your eyes shut. A few stray tears fall. You lift your finger fast, brushing them away before he can see.

“No.”

"Bullshit, man. I hear her. Hi, Jilly." You reach up, shoving Rafe off you before crawling off the bed, gathering your things on the floor before bounding toward the door as those same tears stream down your cheeks. Goddammit. Rafe reaches out for you, hauling you back in; his cheeks, flushed; eyes darting frantically.

"Let me go, Rafe.”

"Y/n, please. I can explain.”

"I'm so fuckin' done, Rafe. Just - Fuck! Just leave me alone!" You hiss.

“Shit, y/n. She’s - She's just a friend, baby. Yeah, we fuck. But, she means nothing to me. Nothing. And, I mean nothing to her I swear. C’mon. You're my girl. Just stop.”

"All you do is fuck? Like you’re fucking her still?" You ask as you step toe to toe with him, looking up at his flustered face, silently pleading he isn't doing just that.

"Y/n..." He is… Oh my god. “Baby, please.”

"I'm not your fuckin' baby, Rafe."

"It’s nothing.”

“Nothing? You're joking… What are you doing? Why are you playing me?”

”I’m not playing you?”

”Yes you are!”

”Fucking how? How the hell am I playin’ you. Huh? Been hanging out with you all month. Asked you to come here didn’t I? I’m in here with you right now. Not her. Didn’t even tell her we were havin’ a fuckin’ party. Alright? How am I possibly playin’ you?”

“Why are you gaslighting me? You’re acting like I didn’t just read those fucking texts, Rafe? You said I was the only one you wanted but you were obviously still talking to her; fucking her. If I couldn’t come to this fuckin’ party would you be doing this same shit with her?”

“No! The fuck are you even sayin’ that for? Fake-ass scenarios. Throwing a bitch fit about ‘what ifs’. I'm here with you. I only want you-”

“Bullshit.”

“It’s not bullshit,” he booms. “I like you. Okay? Tate and I haven’t fucked in days. You and I finally started gettin’ serious. I told her I was done. I suppose you read that too though. Right?”

“Days? Days, Rafe? How many?”

“I don’t know…” He mumbles. You roll your eyes, stepping away but he tugs you back in again.

“Finally started getting serious? Did you actually say that, Rafe?” You soften your voice in sadness. Rafe looks back at you dumbfounded as tears of frustration pool in his eyes too.

“I’m sorry for saying that. I know we're serious, baby.”

“I don't think you do, Rafe...” Rafe puffs out a deep, vexed breath as he runs his fingers through his hair, brushing his bangs off his sweaty forehead, either stalling or trying to calm himself down but regardless he's at a complete loss for words. “Nothing? Seriously…”

“Don’tchu think you're overreacting a little bit?” He drawls. His question setting you off further.

“Overracting? Because if roles were reversed and I was fucking Top it would be “nothing”?”

“That’s not the same and you know it, y/n.”

“So after you left my dorm you were just going and getting pussy from her because you weren’t getting any from me?”

”What?” His voice comes out breathy and hoarse at your accusations. He lifts the collar of his shirt, wiping the tears from his eyes.

”Did you leave my dorm and come back here and fuck her?” You speak slowly, asking him a simple question there was no way he couldn’t understand. He hangs his head, sniffling pitifully. “I can’t believe I wanted to be with you. I can’t believe I wanted to fuck you. Jesus, Rafe. I’m a goddamn idiot.” Rafe’s eyes snap to yours, his gaze wild as he takes in your words.

"Please. Fuck. I'm sorry. I'll change. I swear. I-"

"I’m done, Rafe. I don’t trust you. How can I trust you. You said ‘you liked me’, you said ‘I was the only one’. You lied about Jillian… You couldn’t even tell Topper that you were in here with me. That’s so fucking embarrassing.”

“What? I’m not teasing you, Rafe. And needs? We’ve only been talking for a month. A MONTH! I know you have needs. So do I. But it��s hard to let myself go around you and take it to the next level when you’re always looking around for the next best thing. Because if you were all in, Rafe, your needs would have been met week one.”

“I am all in!"

“You’re not. You just want me ‘cause I said I wanted to fuck, Rafe. I’m not dumb,” you grumble. “You’re just a fuckin’ douchebag,” you spit yanking your arm away before starting down the hall. His heavy feet tromp after you, following you close.

“You’re not listening to me, Y/n. Do you even hear what you’re sayin’ to me. You’re actin’ like such a victim but you were feelin’ insecure all fuckin’ month and you weren’t tellin’ me. Just holdin’ out on me because you thought I wanted other people; ‘always looking for the next best thing’ or whatever the fuck. You’re takin’ your insecurities out on me.”

You turn around fast, pushing your finger into his chest roughly. Looking up into his pathetic, tear-stained eyes. “Was I wrong, Rafe? You gave me reason to worry and I was fuckin’ right,” you scold as you jab your finger into his heart, punctuating each word. “How do you think that feels? Huh? Then you stand here trying to turn the blame on me. You’re not a fuckin’ man… You’re a boy.”

“Yeah? Well, you're actin’ like a fuckin’ bitch.”

“I’m acting like a bitch?” You ask weakly, watching as Rafe’s bottom lip trembles. “Fuck you, Rafe.”

You move to the staircase, pushing through the party as adrenaline and fever courses through your veins, your tears making it impossible to see. Fuck this whole month. Fuck this night. Fuck Rafe. You run your hand across your eyes, collecting tears as you pull out your phone, scouring for an UBER. I just need to get home. I just want to forget this ever fucking happened. But how am I going to forget about him?

I fuckin’ can’t.

Rafe’s POV:

”You were up there with, Y/n?” Topper asks in disbelief. “You two together?”

"Nah. Not anymore." I lift my beer to my lips as I scan the thick crowd gathered in the frat house.

"Not anymore?"

I can hear the judgment laced in Topper’s voice. I roll my eyes in annoyance. "What’s it matter to you"

"Y/n is a dream. I know you're incapable of playin’ the long game, but Jesus Christ,” he snickers drunkenly.

"She's not doing shit with anyone... anytime soon. She said she was ready, but she was lyin’. I know she was fuckin’ lyin’. Just putting me on a guilt trip. Just sayin’ that shit to make me feel bad. She’s a fuckin’ tease.”

"You don't know that."

"Fairly fucking sure." I plop a joint between my lips, lighting it up. "She's fair game, Thornton. Have at it. Good luck gettin’ your dick wet in this century."

"You're unreal, Cameron," he scoffs and laughs. "But, yeah… Shit. I think I'm gonna take you up on that offer."

"Fuck you. You won't."

"Why do you care? You said ‘she fair fuckin’ game’, asshole."

I chuckle with annoyance, shaking my head in disbelief. "Where's the loyalty. Huh? Have my sloppy seconds, Top. It suites you.”

"Not really sloppy if you didn't fuck."

"I fucking tried."

"I've known you too long for you to bullshit me, man." He bullies before draining the rest of his White Claw. "You didn't. I can tell you what you did do… Hang out with her, fuck Jillian on the side cause you weren’t getting any pussy yet. Yet!” He puts an emphasis on that point, twisting the knife in my heart. “And you got caught.”

“Nah.”

”Yeah,” he laughs. “I’d bet my life on it.”

“You’re just yappin’, bitch. Shut the fuck up.”

“She's the prettiest girl here, hands-down; funny, sweet, smart, loyal. You didn't even give her a chance."

I swallow thickly, taking in every word, all of which couldn’t be more true. I did exactly what he said… I messed up. I lost her. I’m a goddamn mess. I crack open a beer, draining it fast enough to drown a thought or two, quickly grabbing another, trying my best to forget. It’s so much deeper than just messing up. Y/n didn't feel safe around me... I made her feel unsure. She made me feel safe. Me… ‘You’re always looking for the next best thing’. She is the best thing… She made me feel something for once. She cares about me. Well, cared… "I mean I could still try and apologize or whatever," I mumble.

"She's too smart, Rafe. She's done with you."

"Fuck you, Top."

"Nah, fuck you."

"You're a dumbass, Rafey. Like painfully dumb,” Kelce pipes in for the first time.

"Yeah? N’what should I have done? Huh?" I spit.

"So it's done then. No hope? Is that what you're telling me?" I scoff, my eyes cutting between the two of them.

"That is exactly what we’re tellin’ you,” Topper adds.

"Screw you, Thornton... That's just because you want her."

"Obviously."

I let out a loud, frustrated growl, popping open the beer bottle with my ringed finger. "You're a dick."

"I'm just speaking as your friend. I'm being honest. And, honestly, I'm going after her the first chance I get. Just lettin’ you know. So we are both clear." He taunts through a thick cloud of smoke. “And you better stop drinkin’, Cameron. Whiskey dick’s gonna getcha. I'm sure you're gonna fuck the first thing you see with a pulse, Rafey. You're a fuckin’ dog. We all know it,” he stammers, his voice barely audible as his words slur together. “Guessin’ you got Big Titty Tate on speed dial.”

"Fuck you, Top.” I steal an extra beer off Kelce’s hands for myself. “You better stop drinkin’. Turns you into a fuckin’ asshole with an actual spine. Keep runnin’ your mouth. I'll gladly put you in your place,” I laugh, only half-kidding, glaring at him, challenging him to keep going. He puts his hands up as a truce— his heavy-lidded eyes letting me know he’s seconds away from a blackout.

Fuck this fucking night.

It’s done… She’s done with me. I lived up to every one of her assumptions. I was the man Kiara warned her about, I'm sure. I’m fucked. I look up from my beer, watching as a beautiful blonde struts across the party— legs for days, fake tits, a deep spray tan that I'm forever bleaching out of sheets after rough night. Her bleach blonde curls bounce with each steps she takes, walking up to my room no less. Jillian Tate…

I got nothin’ to lose anymore. Got no self-respect anyways. The fuck does it matter?

I don't deserve y/n, and I never have. I fuckin’ hate myself.

Reader’s POV:

You take the quizzes in your hands, passing the remainder to Rafe, keeping your eyes glued on the front of the lecture hall.

"Thanks, sweetheart," he whispers, turning your stomach. You feel his leg graze against yours as he slides a little closer. Seriously… A set of two eyes catch yours, not looking at you, their attention given to Rafe.

"Hi, Rafey,” Jillian mouths the words from a few desks ahead. He lowers his gaze to his test, scribbling his name on the side of his scan-tron messily.

BUZZ.

Rafe slips up, leaving his phone face up. You sneak a glance at the message on the screen.

Notification: Jilly Tate - You ignoring me?

Rafe opens his messages, glancing at the screen before fumbling to lock it; just another glimpse of her, her blonde curls laying on his plaid pillow, Rafe’s large hand wrapped around her slight throat. His signature gold ring hugs his pointer finger—that same stupid, pink entrance bracelet looped around his wrist from the dive bar the night before. He catches your focus, putting the pieces together that you saw the exchange, further piling on his guilty conscience. "Y/n?" You hear Rafe’s gravelly voice in your ear. "I can explain."

Seriously… More tears. Fuck. You snatch your stuff, forgoing the test all together, quickly moving to your feet, pressing toward the door, pushing out fast, before weaving through the hallway gridlock.

"Y/n? Hey... Wait." You hear Rafe calling from behind you, the pounding of his steps, nears. "Hey, bab-"

"Stop, Rafe," you weep.

"C'mon. It's just I-"

"Honestly, Rafe. Just stop!"

"Let me explain."

"Explain what? We broke things off and an hour later you were with Jillian."

"Yeah. But we didn't do anything."

"'I saw the picture, Rafe? Are you that dumb?"

”That’s an old picture-”

“Stop lying… I saw your bracelet. Show me some fuckin’ respect and save your excuses for someone else.”

“I was angry. She was just there. I'm sorry. I-”

"Just there… Just there? Why her Rafe? Why Jillian? You ruined everything. You're a fucking trainwreck, Rafe.”

"We weren't together, Y/n," he adds in frustration. “You left me. Remember?”

"Yeah... And, you didn’t even try to get me back. You didn't even come after me. You just went for the next best thing.” You emphasize your words, making his features sharpen.

"That's not fair."

"For who?”

"I was going to try… I was gonna try to make things right today. I just needed you to calm down. Jesus. You’re not even givin’ me a chance"

"Was that your plan that night, Rafe? To let me storm off and calm down so you didn't have to deal with me and my drama, fuck Jillian, and make up with me on Monday, and act like nothing happened. Just act like you didn't bang the girl in the same bed we were kissing in. Like you didn't just fuck the girl that you said I didn't need to worry about.“

"You’re bein’ dramatic"

"Bye,” you scoff annoyedly. “Just, Bye Rafe." You spit, pressing through him, checking his shoulder as you walk past, heading back toward the lecture hall to finish your test. How could I be so stupid?

His hand wraps around you arm a little tighter, pulling you back. “Just stop. Please,” he begs. “I wanna fight for you. Please. I like you, y/n. I like you a lot. More even-”

“More? What the hell, Rafe? How can you sit here and tell me that when you clearly don't? You didn't call or text me to see if I made it home that night. That's the bare minimum, Rafe."

"You're right."

"Jillian... still?" Your voice comes out smaller than before, breaking with emotion as he moves closer, backing you into the wall that he had you on on the first day on class. Now everything’s different… Those same thoughts you had about how sweet he was tarnished completely.

"She means nothing to me, y/n," he assures, soft and slow.

"Rafe… You and I, that meant everything to me. I really liked you. I didn't want anyone else.”

"Me too. I promise. I swear. Alright?”

"Then how could you ruin this over someone who means nothing to you? How?" You ask as you look up at him, watching his eyes shift a lighter shade of blue, tears glistenen and gather on his lashes. He lifts up the sleeve of his sweatshirt, rubbing them away.

"I don't know, y/n. I don't know what's wrong with me."

Even after everything, your heart breaks seeing him this way. His cheeks flush with embarrassment for his actions and his blatant vulnerability. He looks around, letting out a shaky breath, checking to see who’s watching, but the coast is clear. He hangs his head, letting a few stray tears fall to the floor. “Let's just finish the test. We can talk later. Okay?” Rafe looks up at you, his beautiful eyes glinting with a sliver of hope.

“Thank you.”

You reach for the door handle, giving it a twist.

BUZZ.

You step back, pulling your phone out of the book bag instead. Rafe glances at your phone, catching the name of the sender as well—watching the final nail lodge in his coffin.

Messages; Maybe: Jillian Tate; iMessage

The phone trembles in your hand as you open the message. A video? You click onto the little screen watching the scene play out right in front of you. Rafe wraps his large hand around Jilly’s throat, thrusting into her again and again. Just a short video from just above her tits, letting you watch the pleasure on her face as her eyes roll back. The clapping of his skin against her fills his room. Three little dots form below the video, followed by a new message from her.

Jillian: I’m coming to you as a women.

You look up from your phone, the end of the two of you crystal fucking clear.

“Y/n, I’m sorry.”

𝐹𝓁𝒶𝓈𝒽𝒷𝒶𝒸𝓀 𝑒𝓃𝒹𝑒𝒹…

Damn, he's infuriating... But, fuck, is he's handsome. Rafe holds the football in his hands, falling back, his big biceps flex, sending the ball spiraling to Top. Your eyes fall down his perfect body: a loose cropped frat tee showing off his toned abs and deep v-lines. His thick thighs hugged with short Champion shorts. He takes off his hat, running his fingers through his carmel-coloured locks before tugging it on again. His sun-kissed skin glistens under the high-noon rays, highlighting his muscles perfectly.

He smiles at you sweetly, making you turn toward Kie with unease. Rafe grabs the bottom of his shirt, lifting it to wipe off the sweat on his face as he walks closer, his shorts hang dangerously low making you hurt with need. His smile morphs into a smug smirk. Your body tenses up as you just wait for his mocking comments to stab you right through the heart.

"Still staring. Huh?" He taunts, causing Kelce and Topper to laugh in agreement, feeding his ever-growing ego. He catches the football from Top, twirling it between his large fingers as he looks up at you from the sand below. "Kie's in her swimsuit, honey. M'sure you got some tits and ass under there to show the boys. When are you gonna stop dressing like a teenage boy?" His voice oozes with condescension, just quiet enough that you're unsure if Kelce and Topper heard or not. You look at the two, none the wiser; your decision is obviously the wrong move, giving Rafe more ammo. "Scared they heard? Aww... M'Sorry, sweetheart. Did I strike a nerve? C'mon, pretty. It's my last day. Leave Daddy with something to keep in the spank bank. Huh?" He rasps.

"Jesus Christ, Rafe. Can you stop being such a dick?" Kiara snaps, looking down at him in repulsion.

"I can," he breathes as his eyes move from her to you. "But, why would I do that? Hmm?" You turn your eyes away, focusing on the water ahead, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of your attention he so desperately craves. "Here," he smiles cruelly as he balls up his shirt, lofting it to the lifeguard tower, landing damp on your chest, cotton mixing with hot sweat. "I'll give you somethin' to put around your pillow when you're humpin' it later." Kelce and Topper laugh louder, catching that part of his dig. Rafe shuts his eyes, letting out his own name in a raspy whine. "Oh, Rafe. Fuck. Just like that, baby."

"Pass it here, Daddy," Kelce piles on, making your cheeks burn with embarrassment.

"You're such a fucking ass, Rafe," you mumble through gritted teeth.

"Nah," Kelce chuckles as he catches the football.

"Nasty little thing, aren't you?" His tongue pokes through his perfect teeth, pleased with himself as you flutter your lashes, trying your best not to cry with frustration. "Aww, don't cry, angel. M'sorry. Boys will be boys."

⭐tags⭐ <- tag list on my pinned post (if your name is crossed out, your tag isn’t working): @floredaqueen @rafesthroatbaby @loserboysandlithium @nemesyaaa @theeternaloptimistt @ditzyzombiesblog @cl4uus @aariahnaa @hyperfixationgirl @akobx @daryldixon83 @rafesgiirl @sleepiibunniiii @gri959 @oxpogues4lifexo @babygorewhore @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account @savayvaybIr-blog @starkeysprincess @unrealmirrorball @romaescapes @cades-outsider @namelesslosers @anamiad00msday @buckybarnessweetheart

#outer banks #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron #rafe fanfiction #rafe x reader #bully!rafe #frat bro rafe #frat rafe #frat!rafe #rafe x reader smut #rafe smut #rafe fic #rafe obx #obx #rafe #rafe cameron fanfiction

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xxisxxisxxis · 5 years ago

Text

Gateway Drug | Part Forty-Two

Table of Content or Part Forty-One

Read here on Wattpad

Words: 3.6k

Warning(s): Explicit language, explicit sexual situations, miscarriage

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I had miscarried a week before the four month mark, and despite the large amount of stress I was under, I was told my body showed signs of preparing to discard the pregnancy, anyway, and it was estimated there hadn't been a heartbeat for almost a week prior.

I planned on telling Nikki before my stomach grew to an obvious size, but I managed to keep it under the radar and it just looked like I was gaining some weight.

Andy had taken me, in and out at consciousness, to the hospital after Nikki's blue color started to miraculously subside and he decided it was better to keep the freshly overdosed heroin junkie away from anyone who could notify authorities.

A D&C was performed, I was given hospital-issued pajama pants since I wasnt wearing any, told not to use tampons, insert anything into my vagina or have sex for two weeks, and I was sent on my way.

"I-I heard the nurse say something about a failed pregnancy." Andy tells me, hesitantly, as we head back to the apartment to see if Nikki's still there.

"They thought it might have been one, but I told them I wasn't pregnant and they decided it was a serious spell of period cramping." I reply.

"You don't fucking pass out from a period cramp, Vivian."

"I passed out because I was in shock from Nikki being blue." I argue.

"That was a lot of blood to be--"

"Andy, until you have a uterus that sheds once a month, you don't get to make the rules as to what's a normal amount of period blood and what isn't." I cut him short and he sighs out.

"Got it, Viv."

When we get back to the apartment, it's empty.

The Rat is gone, and Nikki's gone.

"Do you think he's back at the hotel?" Andy asks me and I pray in my mind he is.

"Maybe he is." I tell him.

I have to give it to Andy, he managed to get Nikki breathing again while simultaneously trying to get me to regain consciousness...all while on heroin himself.

Vince killed his drummer, and he still saved Vince's bassist.

I get back to the hotel, Doc interrogating the front desk, demanding to know where I went and if she's seen me recently.

"Doc, chill out." I tell him, rubbing my eyes and he sees me and relief washes over him.

"Where the fuck have you been?!" He shouts at me. "I was about to call the cops, Vivian!"

"I know, I'm sorry, I just had to go to the doctor for lady issues." I tell him and he looks at me like I've lost my mind, looks at Andy and throws his hands up.

"All you kids are fucking impossible, holy shit!" He calls out, stepping to the elevator.

I turn to Andy, smiling tiredly up at him.

"Thank you for helping Nikki." I tell him.

"I'd do it ten times over, Viv." He replies.

I try my hardest to memorize him, snapping a mental picture of his soft smile, his liner smudged eyes, his clothes...preparing for this being the last time I ever see him, because at the rate he's going, he'll be dead in a couple years.

Tears blur my vision, but never break over my lashes, and I hug him to me.

"Take care of yourself." I tell him calmly. "Please."

"Oh, I'll be fine." He replies, squeezing me back.

When we pull away, his hands hold at either side of my face.

"Keep your head clear." He tells me one last time and I nod.

To this day I still hear him in my mind when I'm overwhelmed.

"Keep your head clear."

I get up to the room to pack, thinking of what the hell to say to Nikki.

He's getting out of the shower when I get in, bruises covering him from where he was hit with the bat, and his chest is bruised from CPR.

I decide not to say anything, ignoring him when he tries to talk to me.

"Baby." He states, realizing I'm purposely ignoring him.

I just fold my dirty clothes up and put them in my bag.

"Vivian." He tries again. "I really don't need you to be pissed at me about this, Viv."

Again, I don't say a word.

I try to head to the bathroom before he's grabbing at my arm, stopping me.

"I over did it, I know I did. I'm sorry, alright? Just please talk to me."

"I'm going back home." I tell him and he looks shocked before his face suddenly scrunches up.

"What?"

"I am going back to L.A." I repeat.

"Why?"

"Because I'm not hanging around to see you pick up where you left off before you nearly died, Nikki, and I know that the second we get to the next city, you'll be pinpointing a dealer as soon as possible." I state.

"I--Viv, I made a mistake, I understand that I made a bad call." He tries to reason with me before snatching my shirt out of my hand before I can pack it. "Will you listen to me?"

"Why? You never listen to me." I hiss at him and his eyes glass over in tears.

Instead of yelling at me, or arguing, he puts my shirt in my bag for me, and helps me pack the rest of my stuff before he gets dressed and gets his own stuff together. "I just want to go home." I finally tell him, feeling a little guilty for being mean to him after what happened to him.

"I know." He says lowly, sitting next to me on the bed. "I just don't want you to."

"I'll only be a phone call away, and the tour will be over in less than a month and you'll be back in no time." I point out.

"Yeah, I guess." He replies.

"Just, please, be careful." I plead, grabbing his hand.

He looks at me and nods a little.

"I will, Viv. I promise." He assures me.

It was bullshit. Two days after that, he was hanging out with Tommy, Rodger Taylor and Robin Zander, at dinner and when lines of power rails of coke were offered to them, Nikki snorted all of it on his own.

But I wasn't worried about Nikki. I prayed for him before I left London and that was that.

I bombard Steven when I see him by Duff's car in the parking lot, wrapping my arms around him tightly, nearly crying tears of joy.

"Have you gotten taller?" I tease, ruffling his fluffy blonde hair.

"Nah, maybe you're getting shorter." He replies as I put my bag in the trunk.

"Short-stop." I shoot at him.

"Firecrotch." He replies without missing a beat and I can't help but laugh.

"You've been hanging around Izzy too much." I point out, getting into the car.

When we get to their apartment, I set my bag on floor by the door and look around at the shithole it is.

"The guys are out, I'm about to go see if I can find 'em if you wanna come." Stevie offers.

I shake my head a little, already knowing how I want to spend my night.

"No, thank you, just wanna shower and get settled." I explain, and he nods.

"You're gonna have to air dry because we don't have towels, and we don't have hot water." He adds. "Also, pee in the shower if you gotta pee because we don't have a toilet anymore."

"What about if I need to do the other?" I ask him and he rubs his lips together.

"We usually just do that in our friend's apartment down the hall. Apartment 205." He informs me and I raise my brows but don't say a word.

"Got it." I reply.

"Alright, well, I'm out." He tells me.

"Okay, see you later tonight." I reply, shutting the door behind him.

I turn to face the mess that is their apartment and I take a breath and get started.

I'm just getting out of the shower by the time I hear the front door open and close, and I hold my arms over my chest and peak my head out of the bathroom, seeing Duff's lanky frame in the kitchen, the only light is from the small lamp on the floor in the living room.

"Hey." I tell him, and he turns around, brows raised.

"Oh, shit, hey." He chuckles off his startledness. "Are you done with your shower?" He asks and I nod.

He's stepping to me, his hand holding out a cheap towel.

"Steven said you were crashing here tonight so I went and got some things...I knew you'd appreciate a towel." He tells me and I chuckle, grateful for his consideration as I step back into the bathroom to wrap up in the towel and step back out to my bag to get pajamas. "I got some shitty sheets for that mattress." He motions to the one bedroom. "And a blanket because we don't have any."

"How do you guys stay warm then?" I ask and he shrugs.

"We usually go home with girls who have blankets." He chuckles and I shake my head a little. "At least they do. Anymore I come back and crash here." He adds. "Also, thank you for cleaning." He notices the much more organized and clean apartment I'd been working on ever since Steven left three hours ago. "Which brings me to my last purchase I know you would need." He puts a can of disinfectant spray on the counter next to the blanket and sheets and I can't hold back to laugh that comes when I see it. "I suggest using the whole can."

"I'm planning on it don't worry." I chuckle as he takes can of spray and the sheets into the bedroom.

I'm assuming to spray down the mattress and put the sheets on.

I dry off and towel dry my hair before slipping on a pair of pajama shorts and a Crüe band tshirt.

Once I'm done in the bathroom, I see Duff sitting on the couch with his bass and I sit beside him as he goofs off with it for a couple minutes before I point to a note his finger is on.

"What's that?" I ask him, curiously.

"J." He tells me and I furrow my brows a little.

"There's a 'J' note on bass?" I ask and he nods, his expression serious for a moment before he cracks into a smile. "Duff, I'm serious." I push at his shoulder lightly and he chuckles.

"I don't know what note it is." He tells me.

"Bullcrap." I state.

"I'm being serious. I don't know a single name of any of the notes."

"You play by ear?!"

"Yep."

"Why?!"

"I just wanted to play bass. I didn't want to learn it step by step. It's obviously working out for me the way I do it now, so." He shrugs. "Is that not what Nikki does?"

"Yeah...but he's Nikki I don't expect him to know all of it. He sticks to the same template of decently easy notes in every song anyway because he's too fucked up to remember anything elaborate." I tell him and he chokes a little, looking at me.

"That's mean." He points at me.

I think about it for a second and sigh out.

"Yeah, you're right. I'm just tired and moody I guess." I mumble, running a hand through my hair.

"Do you need to go to bed?" He asks me.

"Probably." I admit, seeing it's 1:17am on their crooked wall clock, standing up and stretching.

I look towards the bedroom, then to Duff and back to the bedroom before sitting back down.

"What is it?" He asks me.

"I'll just chill here with you for a few more minutes." I tell him.

"Okay."

I lay down, my legs curling to my chest as the top of my head brushes against the side of his thigh, my eyes closing.

I'm probably asleep for another hour before I'm being woken up.

"Viv." Duff slowly shakes me awake and I groan a little, blinking up at him.

"C'mon, I'm helping you to bed." He tells me and I nod sleepily, taking his hands as he helps me up.

I'm half asleep when I fall to the matress on the floor and he chuckles at me grabbing the blanket to cover me up.

"You good?" He asks me after covering me up and I nod. "Okay, I'm crashing on the couch if you need anything."

"Sleep in here." I tell him, rubbing the sleep from my eyes in an attempt to wake myself up a little.

It's obvious he's thinking really hard about the invitation.

"Please?" I ask. "I don't like sleeping alone."

He thinks about it for a moment longer before getting his boots off, laying down beside me as far away as possible, not even taking his jacket off.

"Goodnight, Viv." He says.

"Goodnight." I barely mumble back.

This is where the very strict "friends" line that separated Duff and I began to slowly blur, and I despised myself for it.

I'm tired, but I can't bring myself to sleep, turning to face Duff.

I wonder if he's asleep.

"Duff?" I whisper.

"Hmm?" He replies.

He's laying on his back with an arm tucked behind his head, the other across his abdomen.

I think about how he kissed me, and how did it like he meant it, openly and honestly, and I freaked out over it.

And why?

Because of Nikki?

I remember the reminiscent feeling I got with Duff, when he made his drunk move, mirrored how I felt when Nikki first made his five years ago.

My eyes go back to the blonde beside me, the temptation to either scare him away or draw him in more is pulling at me strong.

"Take your jacket off." I say to him lowly and he looks at me in the dark of the room, the only sliver of light coming from the neon glowing lights of the strip.

"Viv." He says it like he knows what I'm thinking he's begging me not to because he couldn't possibly resist.

I sit up getting on my knees, pulling my tshirt over my head and discarding it.

"Shit." He mumbles to himself, sighing out as I crawl to him.

All it takes is my leg swinging over his hips to straddle him and he's caving.

He doesn't dare make a move to touch me, probably trying to decide if this is real or not, until I'm pressing my lips against his, moaning softly as my nipples gently rub against the fabric of his clothes.

My hands grab either side of his unzipped jacket, pulling him up to a sitting position, pushing the leather from him, he discards the jacket across the room and my hands run down his arms to his wrists to guide his hands to my hips as I slowly start rocking against his groin as my forehead rests against his, my breath catching in my throat as pleasure sparks through me.

"Fuck, Viv..." he breaths out, finger tips lightly pressing into the flesh of my hips.

Pull up on the bottom of his shirt, leaning into him when it's off, feeling his skin against mine as our lips meet once more before I'm running my tongue along his bottom lip to give him the hint.

His hands move to my ass, guiding the slow, needy movements of the junction of my thighs against the hardness in his pants.

Our tongues tangle together as he moves one of his hands up to run his thumb against my nipple.

I whimper, the ache in my core growing stronger as he gets comfortable and shifts from being shy and acting like he doesn't know what to do, to complete dominance, pushing me onto my back, my hair hanging off the foot of the bed.

He takes his pants off as I pull at my shorts, rubbing my thighs together, looking up at him as he gives me a happy smile, pressing his lips to my ankle, working his way up inch by inch, worshipping me with each caress, each kiss, each move.

He's running his tongue against my clit, eliciting another moan from me, my back arching as my hands fall into his blonde hair.

When he hits a certain spot, I gasp, my eyes nearly watering.

"Right there, please, Duff." I quietly whine out a beg.

He listens, continuing to move his tongue against me, causing me to resort to shallow breaths as pleasure builds.

One of his hands goes to my breast, rolling my nipple between his fingers, only encouraging me to grind into his face with his slow, savoring, pace.

I'm coming before realizing it, my toes curling, his name catching in my throat as I arch my back.

He looks like he's about to go back for seconds but I'm sitting up and pulling his lips to mine before taking my hand and wrapping it around his prick.

The thought of it inside of me sends me into overdrive and he groans out as I run my thumb over his tip, my thigh hooking around him as my legs spread, wanting him inside of me.

I fall back on the matress taking him with me as our lips stay locked, and both of his hands are on either side of my head as we break our kiss.

"Are you sure about this?" He asks me. "I mean really sure. I don't want to hurt you, Viv, I--"

I cut him short, giving him reassuring kiss before looking up at him again.

He nods, as if convincing himself to disrespect Nikki and our marriage as he jerks himself off a couple of times before placing his head at my entrance.

He slowly pushes himself in, and by the time he's in as far as my body has room for him to be in, he's grasping the blanket we're on, under his hands, obviously trying to keep his control.

"Are you okay?" He asks me, giving me time to adjust to him.

I don't answer, my hands pushing at his sides to get him to pullout of me, and he thinks I want him off of me, nearly moving completely out of me before I'm wrapping my legs around him, causing him to push back into me.

The feeling forces a loud, wanton, nearly pornish sound from me and he realizes I want him to keep going.

He smiles to me, kissing me again while pulling out and thrusting back into me, gently.

"Duff," I start, breathing out.

"Y-Yeah?" He asks, stopping suddenly.

"I'm not gonna break." I tell him with a shy smile as a subtle hint to screw me into the mattress.

He's chuckling a little, loosening up, before thrusting into me a little faster, rougher, and harder.

"Fuck, Duff!" I can't control myself, my nails screaming against the skin of his back as his length moves inside of me addictively.

He repeatedly hits against my tender cervix, and the thought of him finishing inside of me is fucking crazy but nearly primal.

"You feel so fucking good." He tells me, his cigarettes laced breath adding to the comfort of him pulling pressing his body against mine, taking my lower lip between his teeth.

My fingers curl into his blonde hair, my nipples aggressively move against him with his desperate pace.

"I'm gonna come." I tell him, my eyes closing, my lips slightly opened as tremors course through me.

I cry out so loudly he has to put his hand over my mouth incase any of the guys are home.

Tears roll down my face as he picks up the pace, chasing after his high with my legs locked around him.

"I love you." He tells me, his lips brushing against mine.

"I love you, too." I say back, my hand going between my legs to play with my clit to try have another hit before he finishes.

His hand is moving mine out of the way and rubbing at me far better than I can in my love-high state.

More of my juices flood onto him as my brain fills with more endorphins, my eyes heavy with a floating high.

"I'm about to come." He tells me.

"Come in me." I tell him, hazily, not thinking clearly.

"Viv, I--"

"Please, I wanna feel it, Duff. I wanna feel you." I beg, arching into him, pulling his hips into mine with my thighs.

He doesn't argue, cursing out as streams of his cum pump into me.

He doesn't get off of me until he's finished, the both of us laying in silence as nausea forces it's way through me.

I'm sitting up, throwing up, my body sweating and my face soaked with tears.

I realize I'm throwing up on the living room's stained carpet as Duff startles awake from where he fell asleep beside me on the couch.

Izzy's passed out on the floor on the other side of the coffee table and I look at the clock to see it's 5:00am.

"Viv, are you alright?" Duff asks me, but all I hear in the sound of his voice is the terrifying idea that I just dreamt up an entire fantasy about him that seems so unbelievably realistic, that if he weren't still fully dressed, jacket and boots included, I would swear it actually happened.

My heart sinks to my stomach.

I need Nikki.

It was one hell of a foreshadow.

#nikki sixx #tommy lee #vince neil #mötley crüe #the dirt #gateway drug

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years ago

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Charlie & Ronnie

Charlie: Well well well Charlie: aren't you so smug Ronnie: 🖕 Charlie: Come on Charlie: if you aren't sharing you can at least share details Ronnie: hes not a homo Ronnie: turn him on your own time Charlie: none of 'em ever are, darling, you know the drill Charlie: not your usual type though, where'd you snatch him from? Ronnie: he stalked me but hes too pussy to try a kidnap Charlie: where were you Charlie: the library? Charlie: 🤔 Ronnie: yeah shooting up in the stacks Charlie: romantic Charlie: also you and every other junkie in this town, god bless a public space where you don't have to buy a shit cuppa to use the loos Charlie: but I won't be distracted Ronnie: guess again then gaylord Ronnie: reckon youll get close if you think librarian on a break Ronnie: frigid not slutty Charlie: why are you being such a tease? Charlie: not slutty or cool 😣 Ronnie: im not a tease just cause you miss my arse baby Charlie: hard to miss something that ain't never been there 💔 Charlie: there's no way he's a dealer or a tattoo 'artist' or any other degenerate you spend your days around Charlie: not got the look Ronnie: i told you hes a stalker Ronnie: facebooked me like a ma with a limp dicked hubby & 2 cunt kids Ronnie: cheers for all the content he found like Charlie: you and your several chins ain't that special though Charlie: no offense Charlie: where did he find you, why Charlie: WHY HAVEN'T YOU ASKED Ronnie: sort your head out soft lad Ronnie: why do you reckon Ronnie: think back to every bullshit baby dream you ever had Ronnie: 🏠👶🐶 Charlie: he's not old enough to be anyone's daddy Charlie: wait Charlie: oh no way Charlie: you're related to him Ronnie: got the same ma Charlie: fuck Charlie: that's huge Charlie: how old is he actually? Ronnie: 19 Ronnie: youngest of em is like 5 he said Charlie: there's more Charlie: Jesus Ronnie: brothers & a sister Charlie: obvs not your dad but just the one or what Charlie: what happened to her Ronnie: she met him the same year i was fucking born Ronnie: no time wasted Charlie: that's so messed up Charlie: I'm sorry Charlie: have whatever you're having on me rn Ronnie: give your sorrys to him Ronnie: proper headcase Ronnie: near west as i am Charlie: he's not actual stalker material is he Charlie: shit, if I'd have realised Ronnie: calm your tits fitz Ronnie: theres fuck all worth taking Ronnie: your virginitys long gone Charlie: not how he's gonna see it if he's actually looney Ronnie: if he wanted to murder me id be dead Ronnie: he had a clean shot when he got me from [that sketch location] Charlie: really Charlie: you'd rather risk getting raped and murdered than just tell me you were there again Ronnie: you say that like it aint my idea of a fun night Ronnie: whats a lil sexual & physical violence amongst potential family & friends yeah Charlie: be serious for a second please Ronnie: fuck you Charlie: what are you doing about this Charlie: what does he actually want Ronnie: hes a pussy with a deathwish Ronnie: dont know fuck all else about him Ronnie: didnt wanna know that Charlie: does your mum wanna see you? Ronnie: aint her looking Charlie: surely she asked him to Charlie: not the kinda thing you do off your own back Charlie: least she told them about you, clearly, loads don't, ever Ronnie: probably shitting herself id come knocking at 18 Charlie: aren't you gonna then Charlie: go knocking Ronnie: why the fuck would i Charlie: ain't the only one with unfulfilled childhood dreams Charlie: 🤬👊😡🖕 Ronnie: i can use him as a punching bag without having to catch a flight Charlie: he's not who your issue is really with though Charlie: biggest issue, anyway Ronnie: turn the daytime telly off like Ronnie: fucking hell Charlie: I'm job-hunting with my days tah very much Charlie: bullshit you've got nothing worth saying to her Ronnie: binging bargain hunt aint gonna do shit for your cv Ronnie: & hes happy to pass on the fuck yous Charlie: I'm not binging anymore, babe Charlie: and why, what happened to him? Ronnie: dont take marple to work out without a gag reflex for the purge youre gonna be a fat cunt Ronnie: ask him yourself if youre dead arsed Ronnie: having a ma can fuck you up like not having one who knew like Charlie: and I'm the one that needs a job Charlie: 📺💕 Charlie: how are you not at all curious Charlie: get some imagination PLEASE Ronnie: shut up Charlie: So what Charlie: your BROTHER Charlie: with plural other brothers and a sister are gonna show up and you're not gonna do anything about it Charlie: just keep doing what you're doing like it never happened Ronnie: hes my half brother Ronnie: & the others aint gonna do fuck all Ronnie: hes not gonna organise a family reunion Charlie: you get to call the shots Charlie: you're the bastard orphan Ronnie: yeah i do Ronnie: cause i gave him a shot Charlie: excuse me Ronnie: hes in the club now baby Ronnie: & he aint gonna want mommy dearest finding out Charlie: what kind of fucked up genetics do you have Ronnie: you read the file Charlie: yeah Charlie: seeing it in action is something else Ronnie: stop crying he was never gonna fuck you Charlie: piss off Ronnie: suck a dick & get over his Charlie: yeah you read my file Charlie: long time ago Ronnie: yeah Charlie: things change Ronnie: if you want your boner back he studies music Charlie: don't pimp your brother out Ronnie: you saw the bitch he was with Ronnie: he needs us Charlie: does he though Ronnie: shut the fuck up Charlie: I can't believe you dosed him Ronnie: it wasnt like i crept up behind him for fucks sake Charlie: you clearly want him to stick around Ronnie: shut the fuck up charles Ronnie: he begged & he paid Charlie: so you're gonna let him get a taste and leave him high and dry Charlie: we'll see how that works out yeah Ronnie: im not his ma Ronnie: even if he reckons i look like her Ronnie: no cunt nursed me through it Charlie: yeah? Charlie: whoever you are, I ain't dealing when he shows up at the door Ronnie: no fixed address baby Ronnie: thats how it stays Charlie: you leave a pretty big trail in your wake Charlie: incognito you ain't Ronnie: you know where the fucking door is Charlie: my fucking door Charlie: I'm aware Ronnie: you coming out or what bitch Charlie: depends Ronnie: say on what then Charlie: where you are, where you're going Charlie: if your brother is nodding out in the corner Ronnie: [location for where she is] where the fuck do you wanna go dorothy Charlie: the fuck outta Kansas Charlie: all this brother lovin got me feeling queasy Ronnie: so move your arse Ronnie: me & you old school Charlie: how old school you tryna be 😏 Ronnie: how you want it Ronnie: nothings changed Ronnie: fuck that Charlie: 'course Charlie: be there now bitch Ronnie: good boy

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lifeat1337carlton · 3 years ago

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Okay my entire life has been spent around dealing with the general public.

Working retail wholesale property Management and janitorial along with landscaping.

One of my big pet peeves over the years is tape from signs stuck to surfaces.

Especially when it comes to a glass door or stainless steel which you should never take anything to stainless steel.

But again that's one of my pet peeves but it's something that Piedmont housing alliance doesn't clean.

Just like they don't clean the rest of the building.

You've got maintenance that keeps on walking back and forth by the trash can in the lobby it doesn't get emptied you have the one man cleaning crew that doesn't empty the trash.

You've got two pairs of shoes laying in the lobby from a resident that left them they need to be thrown in the trash.

You've got bits of paper sitting around the building in the mailroom in the stairwells no one picks it up.

And it's because Piedmont housing alliance and their employees simply do not care what the property looks like.

There's trash food debris cigarette butts laying out on the outside of the building all over.

There's the dumpster area that never truly gets cleaned up you've got the boxes the broken glass the debris the leaves the cigarette butts.

You've got the patio where you've got the cigarette butts the moss growing in the corners the trees growing in the corners the tables that got double stacked by a psycho resident.

Wherever you walk on the property you see discarded cigarette butts because management doesn't care because management themselves smoke they don't see a problem with cigarette butts all over.

You've got lights that have been out on the outside of the building for over 3 years.

And this is only building number one.

Over at building number two there are many complaints some of them being the same about the building not being clean properly lights being burned out from a building that's only been open a couple of months.

Or is that lights that have never worked since the building has opened.

No I'm sure once building number three opens up they'll be more complaints because somebody had the brilliant idea to put park benches outside of people's bedroom windows.

Yeah there's going to be a dog exercise area and a child exercise area but who's actually going to manage and maintain them because again look back at building number one.

Look at the dog feces laying in the grass.

Look at all these cigarette butts laying around.

Look at the trash that lays around.

Look at how dirty the building number one is.

Piedmont housing alliance just like CHP Management Corporation could not manage and maintain building number one what makes you think they're going to be able to manage and maintain the other two buildings.

They're failing miserably on the first building for managing and maintaining.

Because on September 2020 when Piedmont housing alliance took over their famous words were trust us and you need to give us time.

You're 30-day trust Is over.

And please do not use covid-19 as an excuse why you could not manage and maintain the property properly.

Because picking up trash cigarette butts food managing the property has nothing to do with covid-19.

Cleaning the building properly has a lot to do with covid-19 but that doesn't get done either.

Of course the owners were group of owners that own the property simply do not care as long as rent checks are flowing in who cares what's happening.

They've got names for companies like you called slumlords.

You have all of the illegal activity that has been going on on this property for quite some time now.

You've got the drug dealers you've got the prostitutes you've got the hood rats and the gangster wannabes that pull guns on people.

You have people walking around threatening bodily harm against others.

You have people violating their section 8 housing vouchers by having everybody and their brother move up in a one bedroom apartment or even a three bedroom apartment where they're selling drugs out of it.

You have hypodermic needles that are left laying on the ground.

You have a building where the cameras do not work but your promised safety and security.

You have secured doors being propped open at all hours of the day and night.

And you have a problem with somebody mentioning what's going on.

You have a problem with the person who has reported the issues.

You have a problem because somebody spoke out against you.

So you decide to retaliate against me.

You refuse to fix appliances and air conditioning in my apartment because I spoke up.

You threaten me with eviction even though your attorney said you've got nothing on him.

Your attorney even threatens me with open-ended comments and nothing to stand behind them.

All because one person spoke up.

More would speak up but no one wants to lose their apartment no one wants to fight to stay where they live.

And it's because Piedmont housing alliance the largest management company for low-income housing in Charlottesville Virginia simply does not care.

If you point out there flaws you will be targeted by management.

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sailourpastel · 8 years ago

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The 3 Stages of Rehab Drug and Alcohol Treatment Centers (How it Works)

The following presentation contains graphic images and shocking information viewer discretion is advised in the United States over a hundred and fifty people a day die from drug and alcohol related problems two-thirds of homeless people report that drugs and/or alcohol we're a major reason for their becoming homeless when addiction strikes it strikes without warning a dangerous road awaits those who don't get help people with drug and alcohol issues are in danger tremendous danger as a doctor a mother and a concerned community member I've seen firsthand what drugs and alcohol can do car accidents jail time loss of limbs injuries bankruptcy overdose even homelessness or death these are all things I can see on a daily basis it's not a matter of if something tragic will happen it's a matter of when the vast majority of addicts will experience one of these consequences that I just mentioned it's not unusual for me to see patients who've been gang raped shot rookie assaulted or have nice threatening diseases such as cancer liver disease all because of using alcohol and drugs if you or someone you love is struggling with an addiction there are two things you need to remember number one addiction is a disease the addicted person is not just quit drugs or quit drinking as if by magic addiction doesn't work that way a person with an addiction is going to need structured help in which they get therapy support and even medical attention if needed only that way can a person find a way to an empowered life number two help is available treatment can save your job it can save your relationship you can't even save your life stick with me through this short video presentation and I will talk to you about different treatment options what would happen when you go to rehab and how to get in touch with the right people who can help you I will also tell you a story that you simply must hear it is about a woman who waited to get help for a loved one only to lose them a few days later to an overdose please listen to this story closely and don't make the same mistakes she did lastly I will tell you about new laws that make it possible for you or your loved ones to get a diction treatment add little to no out-of-pocket cost to you but first let me introduce myself my name is saya beheshti but you can call me dr. B I'm 45 years old I live in Southern California and I'm a divorced mother of two I am also an addiction specialist and I've been helping people take their lives back from drugs and alcohol for many years after seeing hundreds of patients recover from addictions I can tell you there is hope if you get into a treatment program and stick with it you will find that the benefits of far beyond what you imagine treatment offers a second chance at life new beginning if you want to avoid life destroying events such as divorce using your children we're killing someone in a car wreck treatment offers you that chance treatment can save lives I've had many people tell me that when they first started drinking they had a lot of fun with it but before they knew it they had lost control over the drinking and it was the drinking that was controlling them they couldn't do anything else when their urge to drink would strike them if you feel powerless against her drug of choice if you feel that it has control over you that your slave to it think about how it would feel for you to be free from that addiction takes away your freedom treatment gives you your freedom back it gives you back the power and releases you from the life of slavery you've been living treatment can set you free and freedom is the most amazing feeling you can ever imagine treatment can give you the tools to recover and thrive so you can no longer if you lost confused and powerless over alcohol drugs why try to do it alone if you've ever been hit with a craving and you've been on your own you know how hard it is to face it in a treatment center you will have 24-hour support and someone will hold your hand through the hardest times once you improve you can start repairing all those relationships you've damaged you can regain those people you lost you can get a new career get new education you can even start chasing down those dreams you've been neglecting for years and years treatment always takes place in a safe environment well nobody will look down on you or judge you the life of an addict can be quite chaotic and when you check yourself into a treatment center you can find that safety and tranquility you need to make improvement imagine how great you will feel if you put yourself in an environment where you can work on yourself without the demands of family without a dealer who wants to get paid without a job that keeps putting pressures and deadlines on you as a doctor I can arrange for you to go on medical leave without your co-workers or boss knowing where you're going imagine how freeing it would feel to be able to get out of work scot-free and getting your life finally handled once and for all without anyone judging you condemning you or even asking you where you're going if you feel unable to improve under the current circumstances you're not alone no one should expect you to make massive life changes under so much pressure it's just not realistic real healing takes real effort and real time by removing the stress you'll have a chance to be discovered yourself will be able to heal from all the pain and all the stress that causes you to start using in the first place you might be wondering why I can be so sure that treatment can help you may be asking yourself why should I be listening to some random doctor who lives on the beach in California well those are reasonable questions I wasn't always a doctor I started my journey as a computer scientist and moved on to the master's degree in physiology later i got my medical degree from UC irvine did my residency at UC Irvine Medical Center I worked at the VA hospital where I spent six years helping veterans with addiction trauma and anything else they needed for their mental well-being it was during this time that I became a published researcher and became certified in treating opiate addiction the reason I switched from computer science to medicine is very simple all my life I've had people come up to me and tell me their deepest darkest secrets and share their innermost struggles with me after years and years of this I realized that I'm a born listener I listened to people without judging them on lecturing that I realized that most people mourn listening and less lecturing and judging the most important thing a doctor can do for you is to listen it's always been my dream to start my own treatment center and when I did I called it healing path recovery this name always reminds me that listening is the key to healing listening leads to understanding and understanding leads to empathy empathy leads to healing healing leads to a more empowered life these are the words that I live by and I insist that all my therapists learn this principle before they can work with me at healing path recovery I am the founder and medical director of healing pass were covered and unlike other treatment facilities human path recovery is a hundred percent physician owned and operated I don't answer to investors or profit ears I answered only to my patients if you decide to get treatment I strongly recommend you the first center that is a hundred percent physician owned and operated that's the only way to be sure that your entire care from beginning to end is overseen by a physician at healing path recovery I know every single patient and I personally oversee them every step of the way I don't care about your money on your insurance plan I care about saving your life and giving you a new hope for a brighter tomorrow did you know that at Haven pass recovery we give grants and scholarships every month we also help our patients get insurance is they don't already have it we even fight for you to get to maximum benefits even when your insurance companies say no just pick up the phone and call us at 1844 to just be and we'll get you taken care of remember it's a hundred percent confidential and convenient and easy to get started because we will do all the paperwork for you if you're calling a few different treatment centers don't forget to ask them if they are a hundred percent physician owned and operated ask them if they're medical director knows every single patient by name ask them if you can mark some videos on YouTube of their doctors talking about treatment now let's talk about the three different phases of rehabilitation the first phase is called detox in detox you will enter a medical facility where you will be supervised than taken care of while your body goes through this first round of changes when you arrive at detox the doctors and nurses will make sure that you get the rest sleep and medication that you might need to get through this initial phase their job is to simply make you as comfortable as possible while making sure that your body is not threatened by the detox process the second phase is called rehabilitation for most people it takes about 30 to 90 days for this phase you can choose to go to a residential program where you live there and have the program at the same time or you can choose to go to a sober living facility and do a day program I have found in my experience that both methods work equally effectively in the beginning you will need a high level of supervision and structure you want to spend as many hours as possible in therapy sessions and positive healing activities as you progress you will gain more and more of the skills and the tools that you need in order to live a drug and alcohol free life as you gain more and more skills you will feel more confident and you will realize that you can reenter the outside world the third phase is called maintenance in maintenance you need to continue the good habits that you've developed so far you can go to some meetings every week or continue therapy in order to maintain these habits there are some good programs out there such as smart recovery or alcoholics anonymous that can help you greatly with this process those are the three phases of recovery detox rehabilitation and maintenance if you're not sure where to begin just call us at 1844 to just be or email at help at heating pads recovery calm and we will get back to you and answer your questions did you know that there are laws in place that make it possible for you to get treatment and little to no cost to you the two laws I'm talking about are the Affordable Care Act or Obamacare and the mental health parity Act the Affordable Care Act makes it possible for people who never had insurance before two get insurance you may not believe it but it's easier than using the mental health parity Act requires insurance companies to treat mental health and addiction issues as seriously as they would treat surgeries and doctor visits what this means for you or your loved ones is that help is easier to get and more affordable than it's ever been before maybe you're in a situation where you know you need treatment but you're worried about the cost or taking time off work or about leaving your obligations if that's the case please stay tuned with us and we'll cover all of those scenarios a few years ago a young woman called me she was very worried about her boyfriend who had just relax back into using drugs and alcohol I told her to call his family I urged her to call his family because I was worried about him too but she didn't want to tell on him so she decided to wait he kept getting worse and worse she finally decided to call them two days after she called he died of an overdose this is the kind of story that I hear way too often it reminds us all that we need to get help right away that waiting can be fatal if you have a loved one who is in crisis please please don't wait call us right now at 1844 to just be if you're not a family member maybe you're someone who suffers from alcoholism or addiction yourself and you just don't feel ready to quit yet well let me ask you this will you be ready after you wake up in the hospital after a motor vehicle accident will you be ready after Child Protective Services takes away your kids or will you be ready when your loved one leaves and files for divorce I have so many patients come in and tell me they wish they had changed sooner they wish they had sought help when it would have made a difference in their families it's funny how addiction works your mind plays tricks on you it may tell you all things aren't so bad oh I have things under control oh another drink won't hurt it's only when your life starts crashing down around when you start thinking that things have gone wrong don't let denial fool you don't wait to get help don't wait until you hurt yourself or seriously hurt someone else if you're worried about who's going to take care of your kids or your pets while we go away to we have let me tell you this if you keep going on like this you won't be able to take care of them much longer anyway and then who is going to take care of them if you can't take care of yourself how do you expect yourself to take good care of your children and pets losing your kids is not a joke I see it all the time if you're an addict and your life is spinning out of control around you Child Protective Services will take your children away Animal Control will come and take your animals away give them the life they deserve a life where their caretaker is living well and free of addictions some people are afraid of the embarrassment of going to rehab they're afraid but their family or friends may think when they find out they want to rehab first of all remember that this process is a hundred percent confidential when I put you on a medical leave I do not state the reason for the medical leave it is your privacy rights to keep that to yourself your job or your friends do not need to know why if your humiliation should never stop you from doing what you know is right let me ask you this how many times have you already humiliated yourself because of your drug addiction or alcoholism how many times have you woken up not remembering anything you did the night before and then you get these calls from people telling you all these catastrophic ly embarrassing and humiliating things that you did and that you can't even recall I bet you've done things that are way more hey Mary chicken into rehab if you're worried about what your family and friends are going to think I've got news for you your family and friends already know you're an addict you're not fooling anyone addicts think they can pull the entire world it can't your family and friends are just playing along they know the lazy they know your family and friends will expect you much more when you get better that's the bottom line maybe you think your problem is not that bad or that you can beat this on your own if you're not that bad then why are you surfing the internet looking for information on addiction why have you watched this entire video you need help you know you need help don't let your denial see you let me give you one simple test if you're really not sure if you have a problem ask your family and friends tell them to be honest with you when you have an addiction it's easy to lose perspective I understand that no one will judge you for getting treatment being in denial is something my counselors and I understand very well and we hope you find ways to be more honest with yourself in the future living in the real world can be a beautiful place denial on the other hand can be very scary the truths can pop up at any moment and ruin your day if you're worried about the cost of rehab I'd like you to weighed against the cost of maintaining your alcoholism or addiction how much money have you already spent cleaning up your messes how much money have you spent on drugs or alcohol how much money have you lost by damaging your job or under teaming in it think about all the money you will make if you can focus on your career instead of your next fix remember a significant portion of your cost or even maybe the entire cost can be covered by insurance even if you don't have insurance call us and we'll help you get one just pick up the phone and call 1844 to just pee and we'll discuss your options also remember that we give out grants and scholarships every month and you may be the next one to qualify for it don't put it off any longer we are standing by waiting to help you or your loved one just give us a call or email and we'll help you on your path to recovery I'm dr. B and I'd like to thank you for watching you

See more here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e4jZ1KRLQO4

drug rehabilitation definition

Source: http://eliterehaballiance.com/video-blog/the-3-stages-of-rehab-drug-and-alcohol-treatment-centers-how-it-works

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