#if you want to listen to some fantastic medieval vibes?

[artschoolglasses]

This game is very pretty. ... And very addicting.

Manor Lords

[she-who-fights-and-writes]

MASTER LIST OF INSTRUMENTAL PLAYLISTS FOR WRITING (OR FOR STUDYING, MAKING ART, ETC.)

I find that the perfect writing playlist can GREATLY enhance the writing experience. Even if it doesn't make your writing "better" (which it can, since it helps writers with visualization, tone, and mood), it can definitely make your writing flow easier!

Personally, words distract me when I'm writing, either by breaking my train of thought or by getting me too into the music so that I'm jamming out to my favorite tunes instead of writing.

Therefore, I've amassed a vast knowledge of instrumental music across a variety of media over a course of many years. Now here I am, deciding to share all of them with you!

Maddy’s Favorite Instrumental Songs

Just like the title says. All of the best pieces of instrumental music I've ever heard, compiled together with no regard for genre. It can be a bit of a whiplash playlist, but some amazing recs in there that I just like listening to in my free time, not just for writing.

Maddy’s Ultimate Instrumental Playlist

A mega compilation of 550+ fantastic instrumental music from a variety of media and genres. Kind of a whiplash playlist if you put it on shuffle, but is a great start for anyone looking to find what kind of instrumental music they like! Playlist Groupings in Order: Independent instrumental songs, live action movies, animated movies, animated tv shows, live action tv shows, video games.

Maddy's Instrumental for Sleep

Some more chill vibe instrumental for people who either A) want to sleep or B) want a relaxed playlist that won't distract you with loud volume and sudden changes in tempo or melody.

MISC PLAYLISTS:

you're a haggard adventurer discovering worlds beyond your wildest dreams

Music to inspire wonder and wanderlust, the kind of feeling you get when you finally reach the end of a mountain hike and see the world stretching out before you.

you're a hero who's just lost everything

Basically the most sad instrumental music I could find. A playlist for grief and revenge.

more beneath the cut :)

you're a cowboy in the great American West

Cowboy instrumental for all of your ambient and writing needs. Or if you just really want to feel like a cowboy.

you're a divine witness

Epic choir music (no English). Most religious, some not, but all kind of have that eerie sacred vibe. I listen to this while writing my book about angels and demons.

you’re a scholar uncovering the secrets of the universe

Great chill study playlist! Has the kind of same exploratory/discovery type feel as the haggard adventurer playlist, but more dark academia.

you’re a villain plotting to take over the world

Villain-coded instrumental! Sinister, dark, and/or unsettling.

you're an academic weapon

HIGH BPM STUDY PLAYLIST! Keeps me focused, hyped, and helps me work faster!

you're an ancient god

Playlist that gives an ancient/eerie vibe. But some ancient gods are merciful- so there are some upbeat songs for wonder and awe!

you're falling in love

Music that encapsulates what I think falling in love feels like. Very beautiful, tender, and uplifting instrumental.

you're fighting the final battle

Intense and epic battle music for all of your fight-scene-writing needs! Good for getting shit done, but isn't necessarily restricted to high BPM like the academic weapon playlist.

you're having a tea party

Refined instrumental for a tea party, including classical, big band, and some miscellaneous goodies.

you're in a chase scene

Music for writing chase scenes. Pretty good hype music, too. Includes soundtracks from classic chase scenes in popular media!

you're in the medieval times

Medieval-sounding music for all of your ambient and/or writing needs.

you’re in your childhood room. the door is open a crack. people talk softly downstairs.

A playlist dedicated to nostalgia, to the feeling of lying in bed with your nightlight on after being too tired to stay awake at your family get-together. Could either make your day or break your heart lmao

you're the happiest you've ever been

Lighthearted instrumental meant to lift your spirits! A playlist dedicated to the joys of the little things.

[utilitycaster]

What are some of your favourite podcasts / podcast recs?

It's hard to pick a favorite though I will say at the moment Midst is the one I think I look forward to the most, so I'm just going to go through basically all podcasts I currently or relatively recently previously listened to and sort them by rough genre. Note that as with all recommendation requests it helps to know the vibe of what you're going for and what's important to you (I know I just was like hey I'll take most music recs but the commitment for music is like the length of a song, whereas podcasts/books/movies/tv are a bit more time put in)

Actual Play:

Longtime listener of NADDPod and TAZ which I'm guessing if you follow me you are broadly aware of but if not feel free to ask more; I also post about Worlds Beyond Number enough that you might know what it is. I checked out Burnt Cookbook party a while ago both because I liked Jenna Stoeber's work with Polygon and because someone asked me for Actual Play podcast-only recs with more than one woman or nb player that weren't RQG and I was like oh I should find some. Anyway it's quite good! it's definitely lower production values than bigger podcasts but the plot is highly original and really good, the vibes are fantastic, the characters are a lot of fun, and all in all worth checking out. I also do listen to the Re-Slayer's Take which I've really enjoyed! Everyone's good but while I was familiar with (and a fan of) Jasmine Bhullar and Jasper William Cartwright's work, Jasmine Chiong as Farah speaks to the Grouchy Old Hunter Woman fan in me and has been a personal standout. It is very heavily edited, which does take some getting used to. Also, I mentioned RQG (Rusty Quill Gaming). It comes with the caveat of "very good but slow to start and then doesn't really stick the landing, imo, though the epilogues help" but I can recommend with that warning.

Scripted Fiction

Camlann. Modern post-apocalyptic Arthuriana/Folklore of the British Isles, with some hints of other folklore as well. 1 season; hoping they get funding for a second because it was very well done and also I want Gwen and Morgan to kiss.

Midst. Hard to describe but if you follow me you've seen a lot of posts that might help. Extremely good! About to finish in a bit over a week's time! Check it out and I advice you check out the first 3 episodes at once to get a feel for it; the three-narrator thing is also "get used to it and it will be fine".

The Penumbra Podcast. Originally envisioned as an anthology podcast but then two specific settings (noir-y space opera and medieval court monster hunters) were very popular. Also nearing its end.

The Silt Verses. Quite literally everything on this list would be described as "New Weird" and "has queer characters" and this is maybe the New Weirdest. Anyway, set in a world where gods are real, require human sacrifice to live, and society is both very complicit and also uses the gods to sell shit. I think people who are mad about D20 or CR not being explicitly political enough should listen to it. Extremely good. Also in its endgame, but they've had a very drawn out schedule as of late.

Welcome to Night Vale. You are on Tumblr; presumably you know the drill. I can't say I'm like...super following what happens but it's one of those things that's been a constant in my life for over a decade and takes up a very pleasant hour-ish per month. This feels like damning with faint praise but the earlier stuff was great and it's still strong, it's just, you know, the inevitable slowness of an indefinitely long slice-of-life-ish show vs. the more plot-driven ones above.

Within the Wires. By one of the Night Vale Creators. I have a post about it but it's set on an alternate history Earth where a cataclysmic war/plague/various other bad things absolutely destroyed the population in the early 1900s, leading to a very different global society. Some people say the seasons are very uneven in quality. They are incorrect. The seasons follow different people and all are in the form of found audio, so they are all quite different, but it's entirely a matter of personal preference if you like a season or not; it's not that some are Objectively Better.

Wolf 359 finished a long time back and I haven't relistened since my original listen in like...2018, but of "podcasts that have finished" it's worth it. Weird space stuff.

Informative(?)

Home Cooking by Hrishikesh Hirway and Samin Nosrat; was a pandemic project that now only airs yearly, really, but worth checking out if you like cooking.

I found out about Home Cooking via Song Exploder, which is just Hrishikesh Hirway talking about songs. Great podcast; the editing is fascinating and I have found a lot of good music from it!

I Only Listen to the Mountain Goats. Has only two seasons but they are both very good if you like The Mountain Goats as a band.

No Such Thing as a Fish: the QI (British quiz show) (if you're British you know this better than I do) researches talk about weird facts and riff on them.

Sawbones: Justin McElroy and his wife Dr. Sydnee Smirl McElroy talk about weird medical history and dumb wellness trends on tiktok. This is one of the earliest podcasts I subscribed to back when I did not drive nearly as much.

The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green. Has also completed and there's a book that's basically covering the same ground. It's not like, purely informative; it's very anecdotal (as is I Only Listen to the Mountain Goats) but I learned a lot from it.

Honorable mention: I just didn't have the time or energy to keep up with Ologies by Alie Ward but what I listened to was fun and interesting and my sibling is a big fan.

Comedy and Miscellany:

Beef and Dairy Network: also British, on the Max Fun network with the McElroys. Fucking weird. I debated putting this in the scripted fiction because it's basically "what if Welcome to Night Vale was a little less story focused but still had throughlines and was specifically about the cattle industry in some absurdist alternate version of our world" but stuck with comedy bc the absurdity outstrips the plot. It's weird!

My Brother, My Brother, and Me: you probably know this one; either you love it or you don't.

My Dad Wrote a Porno: also British and from what I understand a bigger deal over there. Has uh. reached completion, in that they decided they were done, but the books apparently go on (sorry Rocky I'm not buying them). A guy and his two good friends read and roast his father's self-published erotica e-books about Belinda Blumenthal, Pots and Pans saleswoman, ft. bad accents, corporate espionage, and, of course, The Duchess.

The Empty Bowl: Justin McElroy and Dan Goubert of Cerealously's ASMR podcast about cereal. legitimately has helped me calm down when anxious at night. I am not even a big cereal eater it's just entertaining and chill.

Anyway any other podcasts I have listened to I've either forgotten, weren't good enough to recommend, just disappeared without any conclusion [*cough* king falls am] or involve way more reservations than I am willing to go into without knowing more about what you are looking for.

[melodyofthevoid]

Spotify Discovery Review

So I wanted to try something new and figured I'd dive into more music thoughts, and since I've been actually listening to my Spotify Discovery (I needed new music lol) so yeah.

Overall Rating: 13/30 that I really like and even sort of like, so not bad. Probably won't be saving a ton of these for later listening, a few might go into some character playlists at least so that's good. We'll see if any grow on me. Below are some of the standouts good, bad, and indifferent. A few songs I didn't include bc they're instrumentals that I didn't really have any thoughts on. Not even neutral thoughts.

Good

Dear Alice (rainy days)

Slow and dreamlike, it's not really a surprise that there's heavy Alice in Wonderland theming but even though there's not a ton of singing, I found myself enjoying the ride.

Femme Fatale

A fantastic beat, a combination of western and tango aesthetics, a fast paced ride that makes me want to groove. Love the flirty danger that drips off of every word, it's got a solid identity and doesn't feel like it's trying too hard to be "edgy" or anything.

YOUR HEAD'S ON FIRE

Louie Zhong is always a bop and his lyrical style is always a joy. Unconventional metaphors and fun little bits, a very groovy guitar line that makes you want to wiggle.

Blink of an eye

Halfy and Winks make DSMP songs, I'm aware of this, however I love their musical style and lyrics. Gives me heavy inspiration for my own story just with how vivid and story based their stuff is. The revolutionary spark in here is nice.

Invisible Dan Avidan has popped into my feeds and I’m not really complaining? I love the rock style/retro vibe that this one has going on, his vocals really sell it. A little bit chase scene a little bit breakdown but overall a good time.

The Moon and Stars

Good folk vibes, gets close to scratching the same itch that The Crane Wives do but not quite, which is still a good time for me. We'll see if this fits a character in future.

The Manic

A great character song, will be applying to my blorbos soon. The pushing away from someone you love because you know you'll hurt them eventually and can't take it. Very good stuff.

Dance While the Sky Crashes Down

Eyyy Jason Webly, I remember you from WTNV. A tango for the end of the world and honestly isn't that a mood? I love the lyrics, although it drags a smidge at the end. Maybe because of TMA I'm a little more inclined towards this.

A song whose title is in Japanese. It's from land of the lustrous and I cannot copy paste the title.

Very eerie, very atmospheric. I haven't watched the show in its entirety myself, but I know that it has horror and suspense interwoven in some of the back half, and the clanking bells and echoes really give the sensation of being watched. Of being on edge. Good stuff.

Break Your Cranck

An altogether inexplicable piece. It’s done on a hurdy gurdy which is already a plus but. It. It sounds like electronica crafted by pirate bees. With some Indian influence thrown in for flavor. Like a space punk pirate bazaar. Very atmospheric but also so so confusing. I love it.

Dance of the blood drunk

A balance of wild carnival and orchestral splendor, feels like an epic batter on a grand scale. The unsteady thrill of never knowing if you’re winning or not.

Neutral

Absence

I kinda forgot what this sounded like tbh.

How Dare You

Pretty good? No real feelings on it.

I was an island

Again with the good lyrics, but the instrumentation and singing are on the verge of being unlistenable? Like I can listen, and I could see myself putting this on a character playlist or two for sure.

Tavern crawl

A fun little bawdy medieval style song, Annapantsu kills it as expected, but bar songs/drinking songs aren’t really my vibe? But I could see myself grooving to this generally.

Brand new city

Mitski, which is good, but some of her stuff doesn't hit me as much as it does others, and this is one of those times. Not bad by any means, just not something I can see myself going back to.

Cold, cold, cold

Has a story to it, the grandiosity is nice especially near the end but the whole song together doesn’t quite capture me in the way that other artists in this space do. I could listen to it if I was in a particular mood but otherwise it’s not a stand out.

Bitch, Bitch, Bitch

I do like the Jekyll and Hyde musical don't get me wrong but I'm not a huge fan of this one? It's mostly a song meant to establish the upper crust as mindless gossips and twits, the combination of the old Disney-musical style instrumentals and the rather vulgar (by Victorian standards) lyrics is funny but that's all its got.

Timekeeper's Heartbeat

An interesting case where I like the instrumentals and most of the lyrics but it fails to really coalesce into a song? There's bits that don't rhyme for no reason, it comes across like one of those English vocaloid covers that doesn't adjust for the context. If it is, I wouldn't be surprised.

Nah

Whiplash (Black Math) Don’t like listening to it, not much else to really say here.

Wish you were gay I’m aware this one is a bit of a darling in some of the animation meme circles but I don’t really care for the instrumentation or the lyrics. Unpleasant to listen to.

Two's a party Jazz/cabaret but there’s not really a depth to it imo. I find it a bit hard to listen to despite the singer being pretty good if a bit... too whispery. A combination of the lyrics and sudden trumpet jump scares ig.

Judas An interesting concept and premise, the dichotomy of a queer relationship contrasted with the religious imagery is layered but the vocal performance doesn’t really do it for me. Seems to want to be mountain goats but it’s a little too raw?

I DONT TRUST U ANYMORE Person with a guitar genre, valid feelings but vocal performance is a bit flat. Reminds me of blink 182 but with none of the energy.

[toasttbutt]

Tagged by @infriga !! :D

Rules: Tag 10 people you'd like to get to know better! (or however many people you’re comfortable with)

Fav Color:

Sea Foam Green (I'm getting a new desk and I'm themeing everything around that color I'm so excited)! Though I do love just soft unsaturated colors in general.

I'd second and third in line is muted rose colors and pastel yellows <33

Currently Reading:

-Words of Radiance (just finished the Way of Kings, it was SO GOOD)

- The Ryria Chronicals (also a damn good series)

- The Audio book for The Giver while I work.

I tend to read multiple books at once lol. I've been on such a medieval fantasy themed books binge and I'm loving it. Brandon Sanderson is a fantastic writer!

Last Song I listened to:

Baby Hotline by Jack Stauber. Literally only bc I heard it on TikTok a million times and was like "what on earth is this song". It kinda fits this week's vibes though bc I've got some heavy burnout rip.

Though another song I've been listening to alot is Revelator Eyes by The Paper Kites. Its a pretty good jam and gives me a content floaty feeling.

Last series I watched:

The Mandolorian. Just doing a soft watch of my favorite episodes <3

Last movie I watched:

King Arthur Legend of the sword. The story was a bit all over the place BUT, the fight scenes were pretty damn cool. Made me want to watch The Green Knight again, that was a weird but great movie.

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: Sweet or Savory, thought what hits the spot is when you have both together. I love sweet things like fruit and Juice omg I love juice, and savory food is just so so good. HOWEVER, when you get a combo of both??? Hell yeah. My favorite is this stew my mom makes called Red Stew. It's tomato based with meat, onions, potatoes, and what other veggies ur feeling, but brown sugar and a little bit of tapioca pudding added to the mix. It's the perfect balance of tomato savory but sweet.

Currently working on: Some DnD comics that someday I'll finish. However a majority of my time is taken up by my new job's project, which I cannot say what or who I work for yet but it's VERY exciting 👀.

Tagging: @eggscargot @cedarsmokesrandoms @grasstheninja idk whomst ever lays thine eyes on this post, yee may participate 👀

[bogkeep]

hmmmmmmmmmm maybe i’ll write an Introspective Musing Post about my relationship to religion and their depiction in stories because i’ve pondering about this topic lately

so for those who are reading this and DON’T know what’s been going on...  there’s this webcomic i fell in love with some years ago, about six years actually, that depicts a post-apocalyptic fantasy/horror adventure set in the nordic countries. it had, and has still, some very uncomfortable flaws regarding racial representation, and the creator has historically not dealt very well with criticism towards it. it’s a whole Thing. my relationship with this comic has fluctuated a lot, since there are a lot of elements in it i DO love and i still feel very nostalgic about, and like idk i felt like i trust my skills in critical thinking enough to keep reading. aaand then the creator went a teensy bit off the deep end created a whole minicomic which is like... a lukewarm social media dystopia where christians are oppressed (and also everyone is a cute bunny, including our lord and saviour jesus christ). which is already tonedeaf enough considering there are religious people who DO get prosecuted for their faith, like, that’s an actual reality for a lot of people - but as far as i can tell, usually not christians. and then there’s an afterword that’s like, “anyway i got recently converted and realized i’m a disgusting human being full of sin who doesn’t deserve redemption but jesus loves me so i’ll be fine!! remember to repent for your sins xoxo” and a bunch of other stuff and IT’S KIND OF REALLY CONCERNING i have, uh, been habitually looking at the reactions to and discussions around this, maybe it’s not very self care of me but there’s a lot of overwhelming things rn and it’s fantastically distracting, yknow? like, overall this situation is fairly reminiscent of the whole jkr thing. creator of a series that is Fairly Beloved, does something hurtful, handles backlash in a weird way, a lot of people start taking distance from Beloved Series or find ways to enjoy it on their own terms, creator later reveals to have been fully radicalized and releases a whole manifesto, and any and all criticism gets framed as harassment and proving them right. of course, one of them is a super rich person with a LOT of media power and a topic that is a lot more destructive in our current zeitgeist, and the other is an independent webcomic creator, so it’s  not the same situation. just similar vibez ya feel as a result of this, i have been Thinking. and just this feels like some sort of defeat like god dammit she got me i AM thinking about the topic she wrote about!!! i should dismiss the whole thing!!! but thinking about topics is probably a good thing so hey lets go. me, i’m agnostic. i understand that this is a ‘lazy’ position to take, but it’s what works for me. i simply do not vibe with organized religion, personally. (i had the wikipedia page for ‘chaos magic’ open in a tab for several weeks, if that helps.) i was raised by atheists in a majorly atheist culture. christian atheist, i should specify. norway has been mostly and historically lutheran, and religion has usually been a private and personal thing. it turns out the teacher i had in 7th grade was mormon, but i ONLY found out because he showed up in a tv series discussing religious groups in norway later, and he was honestly one of the best teachers i have ever had - he reignited the whole class’ interest in science, math, and dungeons and dragons. it was a real “wait WHAT” moment for my teenage self. i think i was briefly converted to christianity by my friend when i was like 7, who grew up in a christian family (i visited them a couple times and always forgot they do prayers before dinner. oops!), but like, she ALSO made me believe she was the guardian of a secret magic orb that controls the entire world and if i told anybody the world would burn down in 3 seconds. i only suspected something was off when one day the Orb ran on batteries, and another day the Orb had to be plugged in to charge. in my defense i really wanted to be part of a cool fantasy plot. i had no idea how to be a christian beyond “uuuuh believe in god i guess” so it just faded away on its own. when i met this friend several years later, she was no longer christian. i think every childhood friend of mine who grew up in a christian family, was no longer christian when they grew up. most notably my closest internet friend whose family was catholic - she had several siblings, and each of them took a wildly different path, from hippie treehugger to laveyan satanist or something in that area. (i joined them for a sermon in a church when they visited my town. my phone went off during it because i had forgotten to silence it. oops!) ((i also really liked their mother’s interpretation of purgatory. she explained it as a bath, not fire. i like that.)) i have never had any personal negative experiences with christianity, despite being openly queer/gay/trans. the only time someone has directly told me i’m going to hell was some guy who saw me wearing a hoodie on norway’s constitution day. yeah i still remember that you bastard i’ve sworn to be spiteful about it till the day i die!! i’ve actually had much more insufferable interactions with the obnoxious kind of atheists - like yes yes i agree with you on a lot but that doesn’t diminish your ability to be an absolute hypocrite, it turns out? i remember going to see the movie ‘noah’ with a friend who had recently discovered reddit atheism and it was just really exhausting to discuss it with her. one of these Obnoxious Atheists is my Own Mother. which is a little strange, honestly, because she LOVES visiting churches for the Aesthetic and Architecture. we cannot go anywhere without having to stop by a pretty church to Admire and Explore. I’VE BEEN IN SO MANY CHURCHES FOR AN ATHEIST RAISED NON-CHRISTIAN. i’ve been to the vatican TWICE (i genuinely don’t even know how much of my extended family is christian. up north in the tiny village i come from, i believe my uncle is the churchkeeper, and it’s the only building in the area that did not get burnt down by the the nazis during ww2 - mostly because soldiers needed a place to sleep. still don’t know whether or not said uncle believes or not, because hey, it’s Personal) i think my biggest personal relationship to religion, and christianity specifically, has been academic. yeah, we learned a brief synopsis of world religions at school (and i remember the class used to be called ‘christianity, religion, and ethics’ and got changed to ‘religion, beliefs, and ethics’ which is cool. it was probably a big discourse but i was a teen who didnt care), but also my bachelor degree is in art history, specifically western art history because it’s a vast sprawling topic and they had to distill it as best they could SIGHS. western art history is deeply entangled with the history of the church, and i think the most i’ve ever learnt about christianity is through these classes (one of my professors wrote an article about how jesus can be interpreted as queer which i Deeply Appreciate). i also specifically tried to diversify my academic input by picking classes such as ‘depiction of muslims and jewish people in western medieval art’ and ‘art and religion’ when i was an exchange student in canada, along with 101 classes in anthropology and archaeology. because i think human diversity and culture is very cool and i want to absorb that knowledge as best as i can. i think my exchange semester in canada was the most religiously diverse space have ever been in, to be honest. now as an adult i have more christian friends again, but friends who chose it for themselves, and who practice in ways that sound good and healthy, like a place of solace and community for them. the vast majority of my friends are queer too, yknow?? i’ve known too many people who have seen these identities as fated opposites, but they aren’t, they’re just parts of who people are. it’s like... i genuinely love people having their faiths and beliefs so much. i love people finding that space where they belong and feel safe in. i love people having communities and heritages and connections. i deeply respect and admire opening up that space for faith within any other communities, like... if i’m going to listen to a podcast about scepticism and cults, i am not going to listen to it if it’s just an excuse to bash religion. i think the search for truth needs to be compassionate, always. you can acknowledge that crystals are cool and make people happy AND that multi level marketing schemes are deeply harmful and prey on people in vulnerable situaitons. YOU KNOW???? so now’s when i bring up Apocalypse Comic again. one of the things i really did like about it was, ironically, how it handled religion. in its setting, people have returned to old gods, and their magic drew power from their religion. characters from different regions had different beliefs and sources. in the first arc, they meet the spirit of a lutheran pastor, who ends up helping them with her powers. it was treated as, in the creators own words, ‘just another mythology’. and honestly? i love that. it was one of the nicest depictions i’ve seen of christianity in fiction, and as something that could coexist with other faiths. I Vibe With That. and then, uh, then... bunny dystopia comic. it just... it just straight up tells you christianity is literally the only way to..?? be a good person??? i guess?? i’m still kind of struggling to parse what exactly it wanted to say. the evil social media overlord bird tells you the bible makes you a DANGEROUS FREETHINKER, but the comic also treats rewriting the bible or finding your own way to faith as something,, Bad. The Bible Must Remain Unsullied. Never Criticize The Bible. also, doing good things just for social media clout is bad and selfish. you should do good things so you don’t burn in hell instead. is that the message? it reads a lot like the comic creator already had the idea for the comic, but only got the urge to make it after she was converted and needed to spread the good word. you do you i guess!! i understand that she’s new to this and probably Going Through Something, and this is just a step on her journey. but the absolute self-loathing she described in her afterword... it does not sound good. i’m just some agnostic kid so what do i know, but i do not think that kind of self-flagellating is a kind faith to have for yourself. i might not ever have been properly religious, but you know what i AM familiar with? a brain wired for ocd and intrusive thoughts. for a lot of my life i’ve struggled with my own kind of purity complex. i’ve had this really strange sensitivity for things that felt ‘tainted’. i’ve experienced having to remove more and more words from my vocabulary because they were Bad and i did not want to sully my sentences. it stacked, too - if a word turned out to be an euphemism for something, i could never feel comfortable saying it again. i still struggle a bit with these things, but i have confronted these things within myself. i’ve had to make myself comfortable with imperfection and ‘tainted’ things and accept that these are just, arbitrary categories my mind made up. maybe that’s the reason i can’t do organized religion even if i found one that fit for me - just like diets can trigger disordered eating, i think it would carve some bad brainpaths for me. so yeah i’m worried i guess! i’m worried when people think it’s so good that she finally found the correct faith even if it’s causing all this self-hate. is there really not a better way? or are they just trusting she’ll find it? and yeah it’s none of my concern, it’s like, i worry for jkr too but i do not want her within miles of my trans self thANKS. so like, i DO enjoy media that explores faith and what it means for you. my favourite band is the oh hellos, which DOES draw on faith and the songwriter’s experience with it. because of my religious iliteracy most of it has flown over my head for years and i’m like “oh hey this is gay” and then only later realize it was about god all along Probably. i like what they’ve done with the place. also, stormlight archive - i had NO idea sanderson was mormon, the way he writes his characters, many of whom actively discuss religion and their relationship to it. i love that about the books, honestly. Media That Explores Religion In A Complex And Compassionate Way... we like that i’ve been thinking about my own stories too, and how i might want to explore faith in them. most of my settings are based on magic and it’s like, what role does religion have in a world where gods are real and makes u magic. in sparrow spellcaster’s story, xe creates? summons? an old god - brings them to life out of the idea of them. it’s a story about hubris, mostly. then there’s iphimery, the story where i am actively fleshing out a pantheon. there’s no doubt the gods are real in the fantasy version of iphimery, they are the source of magic and sustain themselves on slivers of humanity in exchange. but in the modern version, where they are mostly forgotten? that’s some room for me to explore, i think. especially the character of timian, who comes from a smaller town and moves to a large and diverse city. in the fantasy story, the guardian deity chooses his sister as a vessel. in the modern setting, that does not happen, and i don’t yet know what does, but i really want timian to be someone who struggles with his identity - his faith, his sexuality, the expectations cast upon him by his hometown... i’m sure it’s a cliché story retold through a million gay characters but i want to do it too okay. i want to see him carve out his own way of existing within the world because i care him and want to see him thrive!!! alrighty i THINK that’s all i wanted to write. thanks if you read all of this, and if you didn’t that’s super cool have a nice day !

[ettawritesnstudies]

WIP influences tag

thanks @kittensartswriting and @siarven for the tag! I think the rules are just that you ramble about a few influences for your WIPs so I’m going to do this for The Laoche Chronicles as a whole, including both Storge and the main trilogy that I really need to name. 

Life stuff! 

Sometimes (a lot of the times) reality is stranger than any fiction I could come up with, and so one of my favorite things to do is take scary and relevant irl situations and then recontextualize them in a fantasy world to get a different POV (and give the characters dealing with them a happy ending). For example in Storge: what would a world look like where sexism and racism don’t really exist, but there’s serious systematic oppression based on magic and religion? How does a healthy vs unhealthy family deal with a crisis? how does a society get so polarized? For Laoche: I was sitting in Calc AP my senior year listening to my friends complain about the upcoming test when someone said “I’d kill to get into X program” and my first thought was “hmm. what if?”

This sort of stuff is the driving force behind the themes in all of my stories. No matter how fantastical it gets, it’ll always have that relatable basis in reality to ground readers in the story.

This is going to get long so there’s more under the cut...

Mythology and religion:

This should come as a surprise to absolutely no one given how many religions and variations on religions I worldbuild for this world but the way people understand the supernatural and approach concepts like faith and hope and a higher power fascinate me. Also a really weird thing that I’ve noticed reading modern literature as a devout Catholic (especially YA novels) is that it’s very commonly sterile and secular for some reason? I only realized this after going back to classics this year like Dracula and being surprised when characters write prayers into their diary entries. This shouldn’t have surprised me becasue that’s something I do, but after consuming so much modern media and then going back to it, I found myself weirdly missing how much faith was intrinsically baked into society back then, for better or for worse, because it adds a really interesting dimension to how characters view the world. 

which leads into my next point...

The Sword and Serpent Series by Taylor Marshall and pretty much anything Hannah Heath has ever written (names are links to their books)

I don’t actually like Christian fiction like 90% of the time. A lot of it is written by writers from different protestant denominations which is fine, but sometimes the theology has me going ????, or the genres are just not my thing, and regardless of the denomination it all runs the risk of being really really preachy. (sorry, Narnia, that means you too). These two writers are outliers and I want to be like them when I grow up. 

Hannah Heath is a scifi/fantasy/dystopian writer who actively goes out of her way to tell good stories that also happen to have a Christian theme so that they avoid that preacher pitfall, and her worldbuilding and prose are spectacular. She also tackles a lot of hard themes and is a huge disability advocate which is incredible! I haven’t read all of her works yet but I’m slowly working through them. Skys of Dripping Gold made me cry a few different times and it’s a novella. 

Sword and Serpent is a trilogy historical fiction retelling of the St. George and the Dragon that ALSO deals with the political climate the Roman empire in 333AD and it’s FANTASTIC. There are saint cameos everywhere and if you know their stories it’s really cool to spot them even if you don’t recognize their period-accurate names, and it does a great job of showing how much the underground church relied on each other to survive. The character arcs and dynamics are amazing, the way it blends mythos and reality is amazing, and my (unfairly underrated imo) confirmation saint, Catherine of Alexandria, is a main character in the 2nd book so what more could you want??

Rangers Apprentice by John Flanagan and The Chronicles of Prydain by Lloyd Alexander

moreso for Laoche than Storge but these were my favorite book series in middle school when I first came up with the story and their general genre inspired a lot of what Laoche eventually would become. Grand adventures with epic final battles, a small band of heroes trying to save a kingdom becasue they have the knowledge of how, and earning the trust and help of other people through their heroic actions. Swords and magic and bows and knifes and cool capes/cloaks and horses and castles and all that good Fantastical Medieval Aesthetic stuff I absolutely ate up as a kid. Also Alexander’s mastery of voice with the different characters and Taran’s character arc and the platonic love and banter in RA  have me dying every time every time I reread them. Good quality fun all around

The Stormlight Archive by Brandon Sanderson

Didn’t influence me in time for Storge but now I’m rehauling everything in Laoche becasue I’m ~inspired~. I can’t speak to the extent to which it’ll influence me yet but I expect it’s going to be a LOT. Thanks Jana XD 

Honorable Mentions:

J.R.R. Tolkien because what list of influences for a Catholic high fantasy author would be complete without him? This explains itself I think

Avatar the Last Airbender and everything about the way it handles themes and characterization. Also self explanatory because it’s the best

So many??? people here on writeblr! I am so inspired by everyone who is brave enough to put their writing out there and I have read stuff on here that’s better than published books. It would take too long to name everyone, but just assume that if you’re reading this and you got this far in the post I mean you.

A lot of classic literature? Not a direct influence per se but the writing style is something I want to emulate. Some of my favorites are The Count of Monte Christo, Dracula, A Tale of Two Cities, Frankenstien (sans Victor’s incessant whining), The Divine Comedy, A BUNCH of scifi stuff by Jules Verne and H.G. Wells I loved in middle school and need to reread, and Little Women. 

movies and music should also probably go here but that’s a rant for a different day. I take more general vibes and aesthetics from those. 

Tagging (no pressure though!): @andiwriteunderthemoon @abalonetea @inkwell-attitude @zielenbloesem 

[betweenthetimeandsound]

Three Minutes to Eternity: My ESC 250 (#160-151)

(Author's note: Sorry about it being a couple of days late--I wanted to rest a bit--which I will do again because we hit the top 150--and had to download quite a bit for the gifs. Please enjoy this bunch, though!)

#160: Dihaj -- Skeletons (Azerbaijan 2017)

“When we hook up it’s fantasy We’re just like alchemy I’ve never been so ready”

I completely neglected Skeletons during the contest, as I didn't listen to it beforehand and didn't watch songs 12-17 when watching the grand final live. Along with "Grab the Moment" that year, it sandwiched a horrendous stretch of songs in #13-16.

Despite this, I listened to it a lot afterwards. It’s equal parts intriguing and mysterious, especially with the almost-nonsensical lyrics with interesting images. I always imagined a concept film in which the main character meets a potential love interest in a night club, only to go too far and almost kill him.

The atmosphere the staging created was a bit strange, in that it incorporates masks and a world inside a school chalkboard. For each of these aspects, Skeletons is my favorite Azeri entry ever—it stands out in a unique way because of its eccentricity.

Personal ranking: 5th/42 Actual ranking: 14th/26 GF in Kyiv

#159: Tommy Seebach -- Disco Tango (Denmark 1979)

“Hun er en stjerne på et dansegulv Slår John Travolta i en rock ‘n’ roll På diskoteket ta’r hun kegler, og der ka’ man se Dem stå i kø og skæve, hver gang hun gør sin entré”

“She’s a star on a dance floor Beats John Travolta in a rock ‘n’ roll At the disco she’s scoring, and there you see Them queue up with an eye on her, every time she enters”

Disco and tango are two genres you don’t expect to work together, despite them being so fun to dance to. Despite this, Tommy Seebach makes it sound natural. There’s a bit of adjustment needed when listening to it, but it’s equally flirty and groovy all at once, as one gets to know the many quirks of the song.

The live performance definitely elevates it--not only with Debbie Cameron's enthusiasm (she would come back two years later with Tommy in a bigger part), but also because of the orchestration. The mix with strings and castanets in the chorus was definitely the best part and gets me shaking.

It’s different for Denmark, but definitely a song you should put in a disco (*clap clap*) from time to time!

Personal ranking: 3rd/19 Actual ranking: 6th/19 in Jerusalem

#158: Poli Genova -- If Love (Were) a Crime (Bulgaria 2016)

“Unafraid, never fade When it’s dark we illuminate”

Bulgaria’s comeback after a two-year hiatus sees them with a hyper energetic pop song with an uplifting message. While it seems like a simple one at first, the diverse Eurovision community can embrace it for its openness and determination. The great production upholds this gem, and the lighting on stage adds to it, especially in the end.

Poli definitely makes this song come to life with her vocals and her upbeat personality, making it shine even more! (And I did like her costume--not something for everyday-wear, but definitely one fitting the song and a bit avant--garde too). Compared to her first entry, which fights against those who put her down in a pop-rock way, she delivers with fun.

And they got their first qualification in nine years and a start to a nice run of entries as a result.

Personal ranking: 5th/42 Actual ranking: 4th/42 GF in Stockholm

#157: Athena -- For Real (Turkey 2004)

“All I know is you don’t want to be part of the crowd Realise yourself You say it but don’t feel it, what you sayin’ has no meanin’ Don’t hide your soul”

For their host entry, Turkey brings upon Athena, a ska-punk (and former metalcore) band with this bouncy song. And it’s such a great one—filled with energy and fun. A bit different from what we expect from Turkey, but it shows what their music industry could bring.

It's lively and fun, with Gokhan leading the charge with his presence. At times, he shouts more than he sings and it seems like he didn't dress up for a more formal event. That said, there's still a lot of charm in "For Real's" performance, ranging from the sharks in the background to the "Hi mom!" and the peace jacket. It comes along in an eccentric package, and makes for a solid predecessor to their rock-based entries four years later.

And it definitely hints at being oneself, which celebrates individuality in a fun way.

(Plus, that's the reason why my top three in 2004 isn't the actual top three. Haha)

Personal ranking: 3rd/36 Actual ranking: 4th/24 in Istanbul

#156: Katarína Hasprová - Modlitba (Slovakia 1998)

“Láska kráčam údolím sĺz A len ty môžeš zmierniť môj žiaľ Túžim sa dotknúť tvojich pier, tvojich rúk Prosím vráť sa mi, nevzdaj sa nás”

“Love, I am walking the valley of tears Only you can get me out of misery I long to touch your hands, your lips Please, come back, do not give up”

A comment on the interwebs suggested anybody who has Horehronie as their favorite Slovak entry has never listened to this. I could understand why people would gravitate towards the former, but this stands out more for me (and not just because of the religious title).

The introduction reminds me of “Kiss From a Rose”, which here, is less meant to be about plagiarism and more about the 1990s feel of it. Musically, it takes the same medieval elements from other 1990s entries, but it tells a different story, one about trying to fix a relationship on the rocks. It builds well, going from an otherwise delicate ballad to something more explosive when one gets into the chorus. The orchestration really helps it too!

Modlitba got six points from Croatia...and then nothing else. It's still a shame it did so poorly, but as a potential nul-pointer too? Sad.

Personal ranking: 4th/25 Actual ranking: 21st/25 in Birmingham

#155: Melovin -- Under the Ladder (Ukraine 2018)

“Nothing but your will sets you on fire Fire lasts forever...”

The song that inspired a fervor from Melovin’s fans, including me! While I’m not as enthusiastic as them, I still love this song—it's pulsating and intense, with quite interesting lyrics about getting up again(with some enunciation issues). There was a point where the song got a musical revamp, and I feared it would make the song worse, but fortunately it kept the whole thing intact with a few production changes.

Melovin proves he's a talented showman, and seeing the stairs go aflame made me smile (even though I preferred the effect more on his Vidbir performance; the flaming LEDs really helped there). Good thing the televote swooped in, because last place in the jury vote feels really wrong (though it could be because of said pronunciation).

Plus he has some good post-Eurovision songs—check them out! My favorite is З тобою, зі мною, і годі.

Personal ranking: 6th/43 Actual ranking: 17th/26 GF in Lisbon

#154: Joci Papai -- Origo (Hungary 2017)

“Be kell csuknod a szemed Úgy láthatsz meg engemet Hogy meghódítsd a szívem Ismerned kell lelkemet”

“You need to close your eyes So you can see me To conquer my heart You have to know my soul”

While Az en apam (#240) touches me more than Origo, one can’t deny this is the more creative song. It combines not only Romani influences, but also a dark pop foreground which allows them to shine.

In addition, the lyrics are absolutely masterful—they are rooted in Joci’s story and packs a punch in the message. It's tells of a relationship with someone who doesn't accept him for who he is (cursing her forever as a result), along with how Joci grew up and used music as a weapon for himself and his people. He's a compelling storyteller, and you can tell he sings it from the soul.

Combined with a compelling rap and a neat violin instrumental, you get a completely unique experience.

Personal ranking: 4th/42 Actual ranking: 8th/26 GF in Kyiv

#153: Blanche -- City Lights (Belgium 2017)

“All alone in the danger zone Are you ready to take my hand?”

Blanche had quite the journey in Eurovision--first her song gets released, and immediately becomes a contender. Then she has problems performing in shows and during rehearsals, at which the odds star dropping like flies. Then her semi-final performance was notably wobbly, but she still qualifies and places fourth.

Despite the staging errors (I would've personally have made the lighting gold rather than natural-colored), it was fully deserved and I think it was better than the eventual top three.

The vibe of this song reminds me of walking down the streets of Tokyo, because of the visuals involved. Everything is in a rush, but one's not sure There’s also tension, because of the dark electronic sound that dominates it. Despite Blanche’s nervousness on stage, it worked well with the song—it amplified the sensation of walking down a wire and wondering if the relationship will work. A startling entry from Belgium and one that really strikes at modernity.

Personal ranking: 3rd/42 Actual ranking: 4th/26 GF in Kyiv

#152: Frances Ruffelle -- We Will Be Free (Lonely Symphony) (United Kingdom 1994)

“Welcome to the land Where all our dreams are planned And fighting is a thing to do...”

The first of the UK’s attempts to modernize the contest in the 1990s, it’s a cool, funky song with interestingly-written lyrics. Someone compared the chorus to a protest slogan for social justice movement, but the rest of the song discusses a complex relationship. The opening lines are a highlight in particular, and everything flows fantastically.

A few bits of the live-performance went out of hand, like with the orchestration and Frances’ vocals, explained by how she was bopping up and down and was told that she needed to keep that down. As a result, she couldn't focus on her vocals and they turned out a bit sharp at times.

That said, she had a pretty dress and charming look about her. And while it placed in the top ten, I think it should've done better.

Personal ranking: 4th/25 Actual ranking: 10th/25 in Dublin

#151: Sebalter -- Hunter of Stars (Switzerland 2014)

"I state my heart has been well trained I’m gonna be your candidate I am the hunter and you are the prey Tonight I’m gonna eat you up"

This word-salad of a song makes it quite hard to choose a good lyric, as it has a bunch of nice lines but almost no meaning to them. Reading them again, it seems like one is trying to get his affections to like him, to no avail, unfortunately.

But beyond that, we get a fun and wholesome song, which features a prominent banjo and even a violin solo! From the opening melody I can't help but smile, or even whistle along at points (everytime the latter synchronizes, I feel a bit of accomplishment). It's a bit more folksy than what the contest oriented on the time (slickly produced pop with a bit of dubstep), which makes it even more special.

Finally, we have Sebalter himself, who really carries his own song! Not only is he quite good-looking, but also very charismatic and knows how to have a good time. While Swiss entries have become better known since then, you can't replicate Hunter of Stars; it's too special!

Personal ranking: 5th/37 Actual ranking: 13th/26 GF in Copenhagen

[st-louis]

tagged by: @goaliehugs​ (well inadvertently but i wanted to do it).

rules: put your entire music library on shuffle and list the first ten songs

i’m going to add a little condition in that i’m going to describe a bit about the song in case anyone’s curious!

gates of doom, “atilla, flagellum dei” - this is like... epic blackened death metal about friulian history? that’s northeast italy. i didn’t really know much about it so this kind of had a roman/constantinople vibe to me when i first heard it. heavy, harsh vox with some monstrous and melodic riffs.

karg, “heimat bist du tiefster winter” - i am basic and occasionally enjoy some good old sadboy post black. this is harsh vocals with very fragile and beautiful melodies. was not a huge fan of their later stuff and i’m very annoyed about the shit he pulled with audrey sylvain on the harakiri for the sky album but this is a very good like... album for when you’re feeling a bit down and want to sulk or enjoy a moment of catharsis.

grails, “stray dog” - this is one of the only post rock albums i still have saved in my library. i don’t listen to it very much anymore. kind of reminds me of smoky bazaars. stars simple and builds into a more complex instrumental melody.

grylle, “france, qui te veult mal?” - this band is medieval black metal but the cool thing about it is that it’s basically black metal but played with all acoustic instrumentation. so you get the harsh vocals but acoustic guitar with medieval style accompaniment. it sounds weird but it works surprisingly well.

wretched empires, “ghosts” - this is a black metal side project of one of the guys in allfather. it’s nothing super notable either way but bloom was a solid little ep and the allfather dudes are good dudes as far as metal musicians go.

deadwood lake, “visions from the faded years” - oh this is lowkey one of my favorite songs. this entire album rips, but it’s also extremely emotional and grief-filled black metal written in honor of “a fallen brother.” this is a beautiful song and the little musical interlude from like 4:00 to 4:45 get me every time.

consummatum est, “hypnagogic prospectus” - you want funeral doom this is funeral doom. hypnotic, crawling pace, crushingly heavy.

vorna, “virvatulet” - i have a huge soft spot for finnish pagany folkish black metal and this band is no exception. very catchy melodies, a good mix of triumphant cleans and harsh vox, some fantastic blast beats to back everything up. sateet palata saavat was one of my favorite albums of 2019.

brothers of metal, “emblas saga” - look sometimes i just wanna listen to the most bombastic, cheesiest power metal you can find, and this is a seriously good album for that. lovely clean female vocals, pretty much the cheesiest lyrics you could hope for, very grounded in norse mythology. this whole album’s just super fun.

marrasmieli, “embrace the eternal” - speaking of finnish pagan black metal. this is a little less polished than the vorna record but extremely raw and beautiful. one of my favorites of 2020, and also on a music label i subscribe to on bandcamp.

if anyone would like to do the meme, with the song detail or otherwise, consider yourself tagged!

[bahamutgames]

Nier Automata: [A]fterthoughts

Game: Nier Automata: Become As Gods Edition (June 26, 2018)

Console: Xbox One (Via Xbox Game Pass)

Alright so I’m trying something a little different this time with my opinions on a game. Usually I will share this on Twitter in a thread. However, I feel like I’m having more and more to say on games I play lately. And Twitter threads just don’t feel right for sharing massive amounts of text. So I thought I’d give this a shot now. However, this isn’t meant to be a review or an indication of whether or not YOU should try the game. This is just me pouring my heart out about what I’ve played and giving my honest opinions about what I just experienced. This is just for anyone interested, and I highly recommend you try out this game and any other game I choose to talk about in the future, to get your own opinions on how you feel for it.

As such, this isn’t a very well written piece either. It’s mostly just me throwing up thoughts into a post. But, if that’s your thing or you’re just curious about what I have to say, you can read my huge info dump on my feelings about Nier Automata in the readmore! 

Spoiler Warning for some parts of the game, including the finale and ending.

Opening

About 2 days ago, I sat down and beat Nier Automata for the first time. And after sitting on it for a bit, I’m ready to talk about my time with it. I wasn’t originally planning on doing a big thing for playing this game (I was saving it for a different game.) But plans got sidetracked, and by that I mean Microsoft had a sale on 3 months of Game Pass for $1. And I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to try it out. I was really excited to see they had the game on the service, as I’ve been wanting to play it since it came out. So naturally, I jumped at the chance.

Stuff I liked

Honestly, I really liked this game. I thought was cool and loved a lot of the topics it covered, as they’re things I really enjoy seeing games tackle. Evolution of life, the existence of religion and our relationships with god and death, strange surreal things, androids and robots becoming more than just androids and robots. The story has so many aspects I really loved seeing. A highlight for me was seeing the robots start to become sentient and deal with grief, family bonds, how they should live outside of what they were programmed to do. It was endlessly fascinating to me.

Game also had tons of fantastic characters. I think my favorites may have been 6O and Pascal, if I’m being honest with myself. But also also really liked all 3 of the main playable Androids, and I found myself falling totally in love with the pods too. There’s tons of other great and interesting characters you don’t even get to play as or see that much, it has a fantastic cast I really loved. Particularly, I thought the designs of the androids were really interesting. Dressed in all black with white hair is a cool aesthetic. My favorite design may have been 2B’s, obviously I thought she was really hot. But I think her outfit is actually very cool and classy in a way that understands how to make a character hot without just being in your face about it? If that makes sense. I also really loved A2′s look, being able to see her joints is a really cool underused aspect for an android design. I wasn’t super into the robots themselves at first, but I found myself really loving how they looked by the end of it. Their weird and minimalist designs really leant themselves to the sad and peculiar story they had to tell.

Nier has a fantastic gameplay style too. I was shocked to learn that it was a Bullet Hell! Bullet Hells and Shmups are my “secret favorite” genre, that I really love but rarely actually tap into. I thought the game had really fun use of Bullet Hell gameplay, with fun Shmup sections and fun action RPG sections. I was particularly impressed with how much fun the crossover of the two genres would be. Fighting back against a bullet hell in this type of gameplay style was incredibly fun and endearing. And I think it handles these two completely different genres really well in a pretty cool way. I also loved being able to get multiple weapons for the androids and pods, though I did mostly stick with the same the whole way through. Just the standard weapons and the beast slayer. Plus the laser for my pod. Hey, if it works, why fix it, right? I also really liked the chip system. I had a ton of fun figuring out which chips suited my style the most, and I liked feeling powerful because of them.

Outside of all that, the game looks and sounds AMAZING. The aesthetics particularly really got to me. I’m a huge fan of cities and buildings reclaimed by nature, and I’m a huge fan of sci-fi aesthetics mixed with modern and medieval aesthetics. And the game has both of these used in really great ways. Mix in some of the weird and creepy visuals thrown in throughout some of the game’s darker and sadder scenes? And it’s beautiful. I thought the music was really good too. I wasn’t crazy about it while playing it. But listening to it in the background while writing this makes me realize how good of an OST it is. I really love Pascal’s village theme, Treasured Times, and the credits music.

I also really adored a lot of the interested 4th wall breaks and ways they play with game mechanics and tie them into the functionality of the androids. A scene that really comes to mind is that the settings are actually your android settings. And having to go through them for the story mode, then getting to see it again as 9S. I also thought parts where your vision gets glitched out was very interesting, and things like that were really charming to me.

One of my favorite parts of the game, was absolutely the finale. Huge spoilers for this part obviously. I was teetering between not really liking the game anymore, and loving the game by the end. So the finale was really going to make or break it for me. But ultimately, I think the finale was AWESOME. Having to play as the pods fighting the credits to get a better ending was really cool and genuinely exciting to me. I had a total blast blazing through one final, tough bullet hell finale. Also, seeing all the cool little messages players left was so nice and genuinely heartwarming. I got messages from the USA, Mexico, even one from North Korea! It was so cool! And such a good idea. And getting help from everyone at the end was so awesome. Ultimately, I chose to give up my save data because the ending scene was actually pretty tough for me and I’m not that bad at bullet hells. So I figured it’d be selfish not to lend someone a hand out there in the world. (plus... to be fair, when my game pass expires, I won’t be playing this game much more lol.)

Stuff I didn’t like

With all that praise though, I don’t necessarily think the game was perfect either though. There was a lot of stuff that really rubbed me the wrong way. The gameplay had a lot of stuff that just didn’t feel right and was oddly frustrating. A big one for me was the lock on just being completely useless for some parts of the game, jumping around the enemies far off when there was something right in front of me ready to get hit. It made killing some enemies genuinely more challenging than needed. A huge issue I had with the gameplay was actually that there aren’t enough Shmup sections in the flight units. Most of them take place in hacking sections, which, in my opinion. Aren’t that fun, or at least considerably less fun than the way superior flight unit sections. And that’s the type of gameplay the ending uses. Which is a shame.

And there are some parts I sang praises about but I still have issues with. Like, I enjoy the game messing with the way you play because you’re controlling androids. But when you have to walk somewhere and the game disables your movement, or you have to kill something and the game disables your combat. It’s mostly just annoying. I really love the concept, and I think it’s not THAT bad. But it’s still annoying enough that I thought to mention it. And while I didn’t run into this issue, the really cute and touching aspects of the finale. Are you just completely locked out of them if you can’t pay for online? That really sucks and kind of kills the vibe of that ending. Same with having to delete your save data to help others. It’s cute! But why is it there? It all just feels so antagonizing for no reason.

I also had a big issue with Story B. You play through nearly the entirety of Story A again as 9S. Normally, I love stuff like this. Sonic games come to mind right away for games I enjoy that do this. But for Story B, it is the exact same game and story with minimal changes through it. Sure the opening and towards the ending, it’s different. But mostly, it’s identical. And then there’s just small snippets of way more interesting stuff with the way robots became sentient lightly peppered in to break up the monotony of doing the same thing twice. This second playthrough should’ve focuses HEAVILY on the robots. Even if it’s from 9S’ perspective, more should’ve been changed to show the robots. The part with the singing robot was BRUTAL, and I LOVED it. But you get very few new scenes like that. Perhaps Story B should’ve followed Pascal or a random enemy robot instead of 9S. Considering you also play as 9S for a lot of Story C. Imagine how gut wrenching it would be if Story B followed a random enemy robot evolving and learning about life and free will, only to get killed at the end by 9S or A2 or something. Idunno.

There’s also some gripes with the story. A big one is the fact that, and this is a HUGE spoiler. But 2B doesn’t feel like the main character. It feels like the main character is 9S, who I like, but isn’t as cool as 2B by a long shot. You barely play as 2B or even A2. SO MUCH of the game feels like it’s all about 9S and I gotta be honest, I’m not that interested in 9S. I like him, but maybe we could learn some more about the robots and their interesting problems instead of just seeing more about how 9S is so smart and awesome and genius so he has to be killed a bunch. Speaking of which, I don’t think I care for that aspect of 2B either? She has to kill 9S over and over because he keeps learning the truth about Yorha. In the end, even 2B is just a part of 9S’ story. Maybe that’s just me though. I feel like that whole concept could’ve been removed, and you could’ve had 2B and 9S having to deal with learning about the truth together. idk.

Overall, my biggest complaint is just that the game spends a little too much time on 9S and not enough time on all the interesting aspects it skims over. Again, the robots, I talked about this at length but I really would’ve loved to learn more about them. How about the existential reality that androids and robots have been fighting a meaningless war for dead masters for centuries? WHAT THE HELL WAS EMIL? There’s so much cool stuff in the world of Nier Automata that feels like it’s all skimmed over in favor of stuff that just didn’t really need to be there? I think a lot of these are relegated to sidequests, but they should’ve been a part of the main story. Maybe it’s just me.

Final Thoughts

Well, even after all those complaints and nitpicks. I have to say, I liked Nier Automata. I think it’s a cool game that explores things I thought most people weren’t interested in exploring. Both in its world and its gameplay. Especially not from a big triple A title. Some of these are things I’d like to explore in my own games so it’s nice to see a game with an interest in the same weird topics as me. I’m certainly interested in this series. I only own Drakengaurd, but I’d like to give it and Nier a shot sometime in the future if I can.

I like the hopeful nature of the ending and I liked the emotions I felt through the whole playthrough. Even when the game was scary and sad, I still had a good time with it, and I hope somewhere out there in the multiverse, the characters are living a much better life in peace.

Thank you so much for reading, or just skimming through. Or just scrolling to the end! I appreciate it a lot! This is my first time really writing up my feelings about a game in a huge more organized way like this, and I hope you enjoy it. I’m certainly going to try and do more stuff like this in the future, maybe I’ll still make some of them twitter threads if I’m lazy or don’t have much to say lol. But, regardless, thanks for your time! I hope you have a fantastic evening! Play a video game that makes you feel something :)

[random-french-girl]

RFG read stuff in 2019: Fave fiction

The Bear and the Nightingale, by Katherine Arden (and sequels)

Listen... I know I got on that particular hype train kinda late. The book came out in 2017, but I only read it in March of 2019, despite hearing a lot of good things. I did pick it up at the library two years ago, but at the time I felt resistant, somehow not interested in the premise, and ended up not even opening the book before returning it. Sometimes, I just have to wait for the right time, you know. Anyway, all is well that ends well because it turned out to be one of my absolute favorite books I ever read. A fantasy medieval Russia that feels both grounded in historical reality, and delightfully magical! An incredible heroine! Complicated, but loving, sibling dynamics (my actual favorite part)! Terrifying monsters, yes, but even more terrifying humans! The complex, painful, violent and sometimes impossible coexistence of a new religion and ancient traditional beliefs! This book, and the two other volumes of the trilogy, are fantastic in every way. 

Circe, by Madeline Miller

This one came out in 2018. I haven’t read The Song of Achilles, so it was my first time experiencing Miller’s writing, which is so engaging that for five days I spent every single minute of my very long commute lost in this book. I’m no mythology buff, but there was something so satisfying in recognizing names and events, and realizing how different the story plays out from a woman’s perspective. I was just floored, honestly. The book made an ancient, immortal being feel familiar, worthy of sympathy and compassion even when she does monstrous things, and yet completely foreign to our human experience at the same time. I kept rooting for Circe, and crying for her, and wanting her to go berserk - every chapter was captivating. 

The Priory of the Orange Tree, by Samantha Shannon

I devoured Priory in two (2) days, lounging on my couch and snacking on peanuts to sustain me during this marathon. What’s not to like? Super fun high fantasy epic, with an incredibly likable main cast, great word building, DRAGONS and one of my favorite f/f romance ever. I loved trying to figure out the inspiration for some of the world setting, and was really engrossed in the plot - in fact, I have to confess I kept hoping I was going to get to the end and discover that there was to be a sequel, that’s how much I didn’t want to leave these characters. Oh, and the book cover is gorgeous, as evocative as the writing.

Spinning Silver, by Naomi Novik

Another book from 2018. I had read Novik’s previous book, Uprooted, and really enjoyed both her writing and the story. But oh boy, Spinning Silver was a revelation. I fell in love with the three main girls: Myryem, a Jewish girl who has to save her family from the double threat of antisemitism and scary creatures in the woods ; Wanda, a peasant girl trying to survive a brutal life and an even more brutal father ; and Irina, whose father is marrying her off to the Tzar. The found family vibes in this book are *chef kiss* - the end is so, so, so satisfying in that regard. And it’s the perfect mix of fantastical, fairy-tale-like elements and practical, material, day-to-day life preoccupations. 

Gideon the Ninth, by Tamsyn Muir

Funniest book I read in 2019, for sure. It’s hilarious - right until it rips your heart out of your chest. Seriously, there is so much to love about this book: the world building is so creative and intriguing and dark, the main character is a delight, the dynamic between Gideon and Harrow is beautiful and bittersweet and twisted and every possible complicated feeling crammed into two traumatized kids and left to fester for ten years. The humor of the narration drew me in instantly, there is so much mystery to elucidate that my brain was working nonstop, and the entire cast of secondary characters is wonderful. I cannot wait for the sequel - it comes out on my birthday! a gay good omen hopefully.

(Link to the masterpost here)

[sole-cuore-amore-e-droga]

Tel Aviv 2019: Straight outta Romania to Eurovision with an edgy plea for a return of special someone

To be honest, I wasn’t that on board with Selecția Națională 2019, like, at all. I get that scandals happened and three songs withdrew from the comp. at various stages due to various reasons, but Romania is just Romania to me somehow. Well there were a few overall gems (some of them out of the finals too), but I just couldn’t be bothered to waste my Sunday evenings on a single broadcast of it. Plus, I was never that swayed by the two big fanwanks from here anyway, so I’m glad they flopped lol.

But maaaan did I have a bone to pick with the people reacting to it. Especially towards the Wiwi jurors. Look, there’s such a thing called as “song growing on you” and “performance elevating the song”, as well as the one that goes “getting over it”. Surely these aren’t make belief concepts of life, hmm? I’m not one of those people who prefer a song more or less thanks to its performance, but there are some good ones that occasionally change my opinion on a song, especially a ‘boring’ one! And thanks to those terrible people, some of Wiwibloggs videos were unfairly attacked with dislikes, and mind you, not only on the Romanian NF interviews that don’t have the current Romanian subject of choice, no - both first-reaction-after-qualifying-to-A-Dal-2019-final interviews (that were of these two) too. And it’s not even the first time a televote winner doesn’t win the NF so you should have SHUT. THE FUCK. UP. (- Penn Jilette) Clear? (:

(lol this is all directed to the people from like three months ago, obviously now that the writeup is late the drama has cooled down A LOT, especially in the light of Ukraine’s events and the actual dust of this Euroseason where everyone made amends with everything, but I can’t help but keep what I thought of this initially because I just wanted to write something for Romania as I didn’t have anything else to say until I remembered the drama so)

So here’s that one controversial subject that unexpectedly slayed the poor man’s “Fuego” and that one homophobic teen by hitting it hard by an extremely unbalanced jury vote (and 24 points to it coming from that core Wiwibloggs duo, no less) and her on-stage couch possessing - the half-local half-Canadian little to no known artiste, Ester Peony, who conquered all in her homeland “On a Sunday”, as her songtitle says (haha bad puns whoop.) Is it any more mesmerizing over the two fanwank fanflops, or is it, just like Wiwi said at first, ‘boring’? Hmm...

It starts of bluesy, with the Western-movie-sounding-pop guitar twangs accompanying the sound, and Ester begins reminiscing her love that left her on a Sunday of September, later followed by snap percussion. And deep inside she wants that person to come back “to [her], to [her], to [he-eeee-eeee-er], eh, eh, eh, eh”. She begs and pleads for the return for her loved one, as I believe the absence deeply upsets her (smoke from the ashtray, everything’s so cold an gray, loving is a hard price to pay) and eats her up from the inside to a degree. I never had someone to leave me like that on a whatever the day was, but I feel for Ester’s song’s protagoniste.

Here are some interesting things I find in this song: its progressive intensity; the decision of putting a 3rd verse up in the place of the bridge; right after some additional “eh eh eh eh” after the chorus (bridges are usually of completely different vocal line ways); cool voice of the singer’s; the strings; the beat... and the fact that it’s described as “electro-pop”. Pop I might get, in fact it sometimes reminds me of those older Billboard chart topper songs from mid-00s por so, or that it could have been one of those kind of songs. You needed just to give it to a popstar relevant of the time and voilà - a hit! Electro... not quite sure on this one. Maybe the bass that occurs in the 2nd and 3rd verses indicates something on it but that’s all.

And man do I hate to say this but the song's attitude is something that makes me wanna scream sometimes. It occasionally happens when I stop feeling so happy clappy for a song a few listens later because I just don't feel like caring about it anymore and that it starts making me feel some sort of a soulache because I trusted it in the first place. Kinda like "Funny Girl", Latvia 2018: I actually didn't mind it at first but its desperation got on my nerves a whole lot that I got completely irritated. "On a Sunday" has enough elements that I like to keep the irritation feeling at bay, but I doubt that even they will not make me want to smash a chair everytime I hear that chorus again... you think you can suppress your smugness overtime, song? Think again about it later

Oh and there's a supposed revamp, I doubt I would be able to feel any better about that song that way, as long as my mind just automatically recognizes Ester's singing as "whining" for some reason. It probably will make me feel less worse if I see a stage show similar to the absurd mess one from the NF where shit happens and Ester's just chilling on a chair. Game of Loans? Student loans? It was random but I definitely appreciated the scarlet madness all surrounding it. I hope to maybe see something similar in Tel Aviv - edgy imagery, why not. Bring on the candles and the ravens.

To summarize, I don’t think it’s a bad song at all. It’s daring, it’s badass, it's kickass, it comes right at you, grabs you in and you adapt to it however you can be able to. However...

Approval factor: I still have mixed feelings about passing it off as something approvable, but objectively I would like to do so. Good for you to try something different, Romania.

Follow-up factor: Anything at least half-decent is a fine follow-up after The Humans’s mediocrisms (I’m helping the dictionary to have more words, one construction at a time!). I liked the Humans more though and Ester... sort of? But in general context, Ester’s a fantastic successor.

Qualification factor: Somehow this did not sound like a definite Eurovision qualifier to me, so at one point I thought it would be just missing out... but it’s a complete effing borderline of a song. At one point it sounds good enough for a filler qualifier, at another it’s just not qualifying somehow. We’ll see how she rehearses it up in two days, though.

NATIONAL FINAL BONUS

I think there’s nothing more I can say about Selecția Națională (refered to as SN from this point onwards) than I already said in the intro, so let’s get to the moments, shall we? ;)

• So what else do I have to say about the fanwank-esses that hasn’t been said? Well, on one hand you have an Amazon-jungle-tribal version of “Fuego”, “Army of Love”, performed by Bella Santiago (who had one of my favourite SN entries last year lmao), who went all out with body paint and wild choreo and a rap bridge in Tagalog (one of Bella’s native languages) to make it all sound slightly different than “Fuego”, but still, that pre-chorus just feels like a pitched-down “Fuego” from a B minor to a G flat minor, with the same acoustics and the beat, and the drop is some limp-ass Amazon flutery magic. On the other hand you have a 16 year old Laura Bretan with an poperatic ode to her “Dear Father” which was praised for her insanely good vocal skills (I forgot what’s that called... an alto? soprano? mezzo-soprano? sorry I know a lot about music but not a lot about those ranges) more than the song itself... there’s a big problem about Laura though as people found out that she does not believe and/or condone a marriage between same-sex people. For Eurofans that’s a major red flag as as of lately Eurovision is very LGBTQ+ friendly and having had Laura next to people like Bilal or Mahmood would have probably been concerning if she knew of them having had boyfriends... Like I said, neither of those are special. Imo people loved Bella’s song because of the “Fuego” vibe and people loved Laura’s song because of her voice combined with her age. I said what I said. (Oh and there was a missed opportunity for Il Volo and Laura to reunite this year in Eurovision had they only been chosen in their NFs.)

• Screw these gals, now here come on the real faves of mine - another rock band, obviously, and that’s Trooper. No but for real, could at least ANY country have sent a rock song this year? It could have even been San Marino for all I cared but this year is so MoR without a rock entry... Trooper’s “Destin” sounds like something coming out from an epic fable about legendary heroes fighting for their glory of the nation by slaying goblins with wearing medieval costumes (with a sleeveless top and metal armor for the chest), bearing their long hair and looking strong and hunky. Lai-lai-la-la-la-lai!

• Now what were the other competing entries I liked? There were quite a few like the folk bop titled “D A I N A” and sung by Letiția Moisescu and Sensibil Balkan, then Teodora Dinu’s captivating pop tune “Skyscraper” and a really catchy non-qualifier entry by a band Steam, named “The Way It Goes”... no really Romania, why’d you let that flop... and why did you also let 2 Gents flop... and moreso importantly WHY DID YOU LET THE FOUR FLOP??? That’s like the best football-anthem-esque song I’ve heard in a while... such a shame it didn’t appear on the national selection’s final. Oh well. Poor those 4 young souls.

• Now what were those 3 (actually 4) withdrawals? First one was concerning the first ever Romanian representative Dan Bittman and his own problems so he couldn’t return to a NF and be one of the potential returning artists to Eurovision. Then there was this Australian-Romanian chick named Xonia who withdrew for seemingly no reason, all last minute. There was one more withdrawal from a semi-regular SN participant Xandra too, as well citing unknown reasons. And then there’s Mihai (or as he likes calling himself nowadays, M I H A I) who once again wanted to return to Eurovision (no wonder his Eurovision 2006 song was called “Tornero” lol) with an entry, and this one is called “Baya”. And then he went on an epic quest of flopping - firstly by withdrawing his song last minute from SN claiming that it’s corrupted, then considering to return as a wildcard, then thinking on to latching on to Eurofest in Belarus, but gotten sick last minute and therefore perma-cancelled his NFs journey this year entirely by not appearing on the Eurofest auditions. <3 Not to mention he’s a bit of a creep by subjecting people to his nude pictures with just him in his underwear. dude you’re almost 40, stop doing that to the kids. you’re not even a “daddy”. just look how alien you look on your song’s thumbnail:

• Netta continues her guest appearances on various NFs, such as in UK and in Spain (in spirit, as it was just the Triunfitos singing “Toy” at the beginning of the ESC OT Gala). This one even had her singing her newest song “Bassa Sababa” alongside “Toy”. Oh and there also was one of the Festivali i Këngës 56 alums coming by, Inis Neziri, to perform something for Romania after having won a music competition in Romania, and here’s her performance. But did she even have anything interesting in her backdrop as this?

We know you did Netta sweetie but do you honestly need to reminds us? I did not see Eleni doing shit like this and I don’t want you to do the same. Well if anything I am glad Netta only gracefully performed “Toy” on EYD 2019 (which I missed in my “National Final bonus” section for the UK’s review (as well as them reminiscing Eurovision’s best moments) but frankly I don’t think you cared anymore about it when you learned I was gonna write so many long-ass paragraphs, so yeah)...

• So what was the exact thing again that made everyone such bitter Betties? Well, everyone foresaw Bella and Laura battling it out in this NF, having succesfully qualified together. They even did well in the televote. But then the jury vote happened, and it included the God-forbidden Wiwibloggs duo voting separately and usualy picking all the similar favourites based on performances. They were very pleased with Ester Peony’s on-stage chair prop and her dramatic mess so they gave her their 12s. INDIVIDUALLY. And that’s one of things that pushed Ester higher for the win, despite only having 3 points from the televote lol. But the worst part about it is their opinions: they have praised “Dear Father” so much for mostly the same reasons others praised it so much as well, and were stunned. A what they thought of Ester’s song? That it’s boring. And their mindset switched when voting on this NF, with 12ing Ester and only giving a few feeble points to Laura. That’s where the backlash ensued - not when Emmelie de Forest (yep she was in the jury too) did not give any points to Bella Santiago’s song - just for that notion alone. Maybe it was because of a REASON. Laura’s song in the end is just an uninteresting pop ballad with some additional vocal exercising (too flawless that you even tire from flawlessness), Ester at least brought something to liven up her song, and maybe Wiwis changed their opinion accordingly by not being enthused by Laura anymore! And what’s the problem with that, eh eh eh?.. oh right, y’all accusing Wiwibloggs having rated Laura down because she’s a homophobe. Real friggen’ obviously because of that, you guys. NOT. Grow a brain a bit, will ya. (and even a contestant named Linda Teodosiu was pissed about Wiwibloggs not giving her enough points lmao... her song was a typical ”rent a NF songwriter” spiel so she has no effin’ reason to be mad her ‘originality’ wasn’t awarded lol.)

Worth noting that one of the other reasons people were mad that the juryvote points overpowered the televote big time (like 7 juror votes against 1 set of televotes - inequal) and therefore did not even listen to what they had to say (again, Ester had 3 freaking televote points lol). It’s a thing y’all should get used to - juries overrating an act one way or the other, against the televote’s will. It’s a given nowadays, remember. I know y'all Romanians wanted to scream "ESTER IS NOT OUR WINNER WE HAVEN'T DECIDED HER WE WANT BELLA/LAURA!!!" but that's the truth with the juries.

And thankfully, that is, what I think, all you need to remember from the SN headache this year. Fortunately it’s much smaller than the last year’s headache that, aside from 60 songs in total for 5 semis (!!!), also had a very strictly eliminative system that had 3 qualifiers each from a semi decided by juries ONLY (geez not even A Dal does that!), only to soften things up by having everyone fall down on televote’s hands only during the final. And then the final had the drama on its own. But if I reminisced it all on here, we’d be taking more than just all day, so it’s best that I stop this here and now, for all of ya who are already tired of all this waffle.

Good luck to Ester! and may all of your fans see you performing on a Saturday :)

[moonraccoon-exe]

Hewwo, thank you for the vibes to make better and for scaring the sickness away. I think it helped :3 So I don’t know if you got this question before, but do you have an alltime favorite game? I know you really love Final Fantasy ;) So maybe that one? Mine is The Witcher 3. And I absolutely love the books. -Peridot

HEYA PERIDOT!!!!!

I’m happy to know that maybe the healthy and lucky vibes did their job!! :D Sometimes the distance can be a trouble for them to travel perfectly, and so can be a cloudy night. Ya know because mama moon is who’s in charge of like…projecting those vibes, so no moonie no magic aw D:

But seriously, I’m very, very happy to know that you’re better now!! Evil sickness, I wasn’t going to let it stay with you for longer. AIN’T NO SICKNESS TOUCH MY BUDDY PERIDOT, OKAY, I’M HERE TO FITE ILLNESS (งಠ_ಠ)ง

GASPS

AN ALL TIME FAVORITE GAME!?

ZO

MY

GAWD

HOW DO YOU ASK THAT, OMG, IT’S LIKE ASKING A FAVE MOVIE OR BOOK OR WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT, maybe it’s possible but oh no, the decisión is SO HAAAAAAAARD

Well, to be honest, XV really has a very, very special place in my heart. I connected with it like I hadn’t done with any other game, and many, many things there felt almost as if made for me personally. So there are many personal and intimate things I could relate to or understand or this and that, and it’s the first big story to portray a healthy and super cute and super intimate boy friendship instead of focusing in romance.

But I’m gonna rant if you make me go on, hahaha x) So yeh. It has big flaws, but it’s more on the…personal/intimate side that I’m so in love with XV.

Rime left a huge impression on me. It treats two or three similar subjects, if you look very closely, mostly at the end, which are the subjects that are intimate to me, so no wonder it made me feel this shock.

Hm….my eternal favorites, though, Will forever be the Zelda franchise. I haven’t played all the games in it because I don’t have all the consoles, but I’m in love with them, the music is some of my fave (have you listened to the Symphony of Goddesses’ arrangements with headphones? It’s INSANE), and it’s been a giant inspiration for personal projects. 

I think I don’t have an ultimate fave that I’d cling to for my life, but those are some of them. :3 

The Witcher 3! I’ve ALWAYS Heard INCREDIBLE stuff about it and everyone’s in love with it. Can I play it if I haven’t played 1 and 2? Or is 3 only part of the title? I’ve Heard incredible, incredible stuff about it. Now I’m extra curious :3

I think I’ve seen the books, too!! There was a bookstore I always saw them at in the same spot, and one day I was curious to Google the name, and I got videogame results so it was like GASPS NO WAY!! AAAAHHHH. Hahaha, man, am I curious >w

Thank you for sharing with me what your fave game is!! It does look like your and our jam, with all this medieval fantasy setting and whatnot. UGH. I WANT. GIMME GIMME KASLJDAKLGJADKLJA

So yeh! That’s that :3 Again, I’m sorry if this is too short or for any tipos, as I’m still answering in papa’s computer (just this is queued for later). 

DEAR PERIDOT

Thank you so much for dropping by to ask such a pretty question. Being given the chance to talk about something you love is always a relief and feels really nice. SO thank you for that chance, and for the time to write to me. I really appreciate everything so much. 

DEAR PERIDOT, I hope your day’s gone FANTASTICALLY so far! And may your night be as WONDERFUL!!! Sending you lots of maccoonie hugs, buddy

[thesweatycollectiontyrant]

35MM

Today, we have more of a song cycle than a musical all based on 35MM photographs. Today’s Bop is 35MM.

Background Info

One of my friends told me about one song from this show. On the way home from rehearsal that night, I listened to it. Wow. I was hooked. I think this show really decided to go in a different direction and it did it successfully.

Writers

Music and lyrics are by Ryan Scott Oliver, who has written a few stand-alone songs I’ve played for people and heard at performances, and also wrote music and lyrics to Jasper in Deadland. The concept came from Matthew Murphy, a popular theatrical photographer. The show is based on 35mm photographs taken by Murphy.

Character List

WOMAN 1 (Soprano) -  plays Woman 1, Image 1, Nightmare, the Lover, Cantus, Watcher, Soprano, Betsy, Nightwalker, Lonely, Jessy, and Chorus WOMAN 2 (Mezzo-Soprano) - plays Woman 2, Photographer, Nightmare, the Broad, Altus, She, Watcher, Les Voix en Dessous, Alto, Lindsay, and the Balladeer MAN 1 (Tenor) - plays Man 1, Image, the Idle Boy, Tenor, His Savior, Watcher, Les Voix en Dessous, Alex, A Friend of Jules and Jessy’s, and Chorus MAN 2 (Tenor) - plays Man 2, Image, Nightmare, the Manny, Bassus, the Sinner, Watcher, the Cajun, Bass, Jay, Her Mister, Jules, and Chorus MAN 3 (Baritone) - plays Man 3, Image, Nightmare, the Long-Tethered Knight, He, Watcher, Ben, Radio and Chorus

Who’s Singing

I chose to listen to the only available cast recording, featuring Alex Brightman, Ben Crawford, Jay Armstrong Johnson, Lindsay Mendez, and Betsy Wolfe.

Let’s Do This

I’m really excited to get into this show. From the songs I’ve heard, the show is really fun to listen to. A lot of good audition songs will come out of this. I’m also following the vocal score offered by Samuel French, so the songs might be somewhat out of order from the recording.

The show begins with an Ensemble number called “Stop Time”. I started the song, and got about twenty seconds in and I was so shook I had to rewind. That’s how good this is. Betsy is singing high soprano notes and I’m a sucker for that, of course. I really love Lindsay Mendez’s voice. Just so smooth and gorgeous. Her chest voice is so strong.

The next song is called “Crazytown”. I have heard a little bit of this song because of the strange noises the Ensemble makes during it. The first two verses are interesting. Then this got weird REAL quick. I’m here for all this rapping. That song was pretty dope.

The next song, “On Monday” is one of my favorite songs in this show. There’s kind of a “Call Me Maybe” by Carly Rae Jepsen meets “Backseat Serenade” by All Time Low vibe. It’s very pop punk, so in all reality we’re just revisiting middle school. Not to mention, Betsy Wolfe’s voice is perfection in every genre. I love the “sol-mi-la-mi-sol-mi-la-mi-sol-mi-re” theme on the chorus on the word “juvenile”. Her voice is just so crystal clear. She’s literally wailing on a High G. She’s such a versatile singer. This song is one of those that puts me in a good mood regardless of what I’m doing.

“Caralee” is another fun song in this show. Before I start talking about Jay Armstrong Johnson and the song in general, let’s talk about the intro. We’ve got some sort of percussion, strings, and a harpsichord. First of all, a harpsichord? Interesting choice. It fits so well despite it being an “out-there” choice for a show like this. Another thing I’m kind of obsessed with is the strings at the end of the measure. It’s playing thirds, and on the last eighth note, it is a C# and an E, and the C# is so flat. I’m pretty sure it’s on purpose, but it kind of gives the rest of the song a funny vibe. The song starts and it’s about this manny who watches this brat named Caralee. She practically tortures him by just doing normal, little kid stuff, like playing with scissors and getting into his stuff. This song is so funny to me. There’s a lot of clever wordplay and rhyming. You can envision this situation. We’ve all seen it before. I don’t want to spoil too much. This song is also really easy to listen to.

“The Party Goes with You” begins and the intro is so lovely. I could listen to that on loop all day long. It’s got kind of a chamber music sound to it. It almost reminds me of Evanescence in a way. It’s a shame I didn’t listen to this song earlier. Lindsay Mendez is so lovely in this song. The song is very simple. During the chorus, there’s a rock organ with some tremolo that comes in, giving it a more modern sound. The melodic line during the verses is mostly just up and down the scale, and it’s so satisfying. This is a great song for an Alto. It sits pretty low in most female voices. It has a melancholy feel to it. Check this one out. It’s special.

Now we’re back to a seemingly zany piece of music with “Good Lady”. It starts out with sort of a medieval chant by the Ensemble in 5/4. Then a faster rock feel starts with Ben Crawford on the lead, and WOW. This dude’s voice is so nice! It reminds me a lot of Steven Pasquale. This song is really cool. A lot of different stuff. I’m about a quarter into the show, and I think this show would be really good driving music. The song begins and ends the same way.

I’m probably gonna skip most of the Transitions, but “Transition #2″ is really nice. It foreshadows the melody of “The Ballad of Sara Berry” which comes later in the show.

“He & She” has a quirky feel at the beginning. THIS SONG IS SO GOOD. The runs and riffs. Wow. Ben and Lindsay really did it in with this one. I wasn’t too fond of “Crazytown”, but since then, I’ve liked every single song. Completely. That’s really great. This is a fantastic duet.

Now we’re on “The Seraph”. The song is slower, but it has a really easy-going, coffee shop feel. That song is really nice. Go check that out.

“Immaculate Deception” was nice. It’s one of those songs where I’d like to sing it, but I’m not crazy about listening to it. It’s cool to hear everyone together.

Next is “Leave, Luanne” which a lot of people have talked about, but I’ve never listened to it. The tempo marking describes it as a “Southern Gothic Ghost Story”. I was so transfixed while listening to it, I can’t write anything about it. This is an epic song. seven and a half minutes. Wow.

“Mama, Let Me In” is a nice little chorale sung by four of the members of the company.

The next song, “Why Must We Tell Them Why?” starts out and it sounds like anything straight off the radio. It literally could be a Walk the Moon or The 1975 song. THIS SONG IS SO FUN OH MY LORD. UGH. Go listen to this. I know I’m saying that after every song but it’s just because I mean it and it’s so good. Literally everything about it. The music, the harmonies, the singing, the stories, the everything. Do yourself a favor and listen to this song and this album in general. This song also reminds me of “Ready to Go” by Panic! at the Disco.

I’m pretty sure “Twisted Teeth” is about vampires? Hopefully? The lyrics to the song are really weird, but I really like the music. Betsy and Jay did a great job on that one. It starts off strange musically, but it gets better.

“Hemming and Hawing” happens, and this song is so beautiful. Just simply beautiful. I don’t really know how to describe it, other than gorgeous. A nice 9/8 meter, kind of a “The Only Exception” by Paramore feeling.

“Cut You a Piece” is one of those typical I gave you my heart and you broke it songs. But there’s something special about it. The song is really nice. I’d say it’s worth listening to.

“The Ballad of Sara Berry” is a murderous prom-queen song. It’s also the first song I listened to from this show. It describes Sara Berry, whose goal is to thwart Julie Jenkins to win Senior Prom Queen. She is encouraged by her parents because they tell her that there’s no room “for a princess at prom”. She goes to all odds, killing all other candidates until Julie Jenkins calls the cops on her, all while Lindsay Mendez is belting up a storm. This song literally ranges two octaves. It is goosebump-inducing. GO CHECK THIS OUT.

The “Finale” reprises all of the songs sung throughout the show.

Audition Songs

A lot of these songs are solos that just have background vocals. If used for an audition, just cut the background vocals. The way this show is cast is that there are five singers and they all play different characters throughout the show. The characters will be labeled as the character they play in the specific song, followed by which singer it is. The singers and voice types are labelled in the above Character Descriptions section.

“On Monday” - The Lover (Voice 1), G3-G5

Good for a soprano with strong mix; potential character piece depending on interpretation.

“Caralee” - The Manny (Voice 4), D#3-G4

Great for Tenor with good comedic chops.

“The Party Goes with You” - The Broad (Voice 2), F#3-D5

Really good for a low Alto who can sit comfortably on the lower notes.

“The Seraph” - The Sinner (Voice 4), C3-A4

Good for a folksy Tenor or Baritone. Just cut the other parts, and this would be a great audition song.

“Hemming and Hawing” - Radio (Voice 5), A2-F#4

Awesome song for a Baritone. Cut the other line, and it’s perfect.

“Cut You a Piece” - A Friend of Jules & Jessy (Voice 3), C3-F4

Beautiful storytelling song. Cut Jules and Jessy’s parts.

“The Ballad of Sara Berry” - The Balladeer (Voice 2), F#3-F#5

Great song for rock Mezzo. Cut ensemble parts.

To Wrap It Up

This show is so different and unique. I recommend it to all MT fans. Rights are available through Samuel French. This is accessible for High Schools if you guys cut the language. This would also be really good for colleges and professional and amateur theatre companies. You’d need a dynamite Music Director and a fantastic cast, but it’s very doable. I love this show, and I can see myself listening to this for a long time. I was very pleasantly surprised by this amazing show.

Get it.

[betweenthetimeandsound]

Three Minutes to Eternity: My ESC 250 (#190-181)

#190: Kaliopi -- Crno i Belo (North Macedonia 2012)

“Отвори душа признај ми, Што сме сега јас и ти, Пола мое во тебе, А пола твое спие во мене,”

“Open your soul and admit to me, What we are now, you and me Half of me is in you And half of you is sleeping in me”

Kaliopi was supposed to be (North) Macedonia's first entrant in the 1996 with the song Samo Ti, but an audio-only pre-qualifying round ended up preventing her from doing so. Whereas Samo ti is a calming, R&B influenced song, Crno i belo is an alternative rock song which takes a number of twists.

Crno I Belo starts slowly, but it really picks up from the second verse onwards as it transforms into a rock song. There’s a sense of confrontation with the lyrics, which the music also tries to convey. And I don’t need to say much about Kaliopi’s vocals—a bit harsh, but awesome. And that scream is nothing but penetrating.

Personal ranking: 4th/42 Actual ranking: 13th/26 GF in Baku

#189: Måns Zelmerlöw - Heroes (Sweden 2015)

"Now go sing it like a hummingbird The greatest anthem ever heard"

I know there was a bit of flack of Sweden's most recent win, because they won primarily because of the jury (they were third in the televote). Compared to "Grand Amore", which comfortably won the televote but only gotten sixth with the juries, which was a pretty bad mismatch.

In addition, compared to the other fan-favorites of the class of 2015, Heroes is a more mainstream-sounding pop song, with influences from "Lovers from the Sun" and the highly produced Swedish-pop scene. But when I listen to it, it's very engaging and surprisingly danceable, with a great message of strength and togetherness. And the staging was quite slick and creative (with a bunch of influence on some of those from the following year)

So while Heroes is not my personal favorite of 2015, it's still a compelling and awesome pop song. Six years later, it's holds up fantastically.

Personal ranking: 7th/40 Actual ranking: 1st/27 GF in Vienna

#188: Elitsa Todorova & Stoyan Yankoulov -- Water (Bulgaria 2007)

"Море, Митра пее на реката Митре ле, ий… Митре ле"

"Lo, Mitra sings by the river Oh Mitra, eeh.. oh Mitra"

I have the strange impression that Bulgaria has a trance music scene we don't know of. From Elitsa and Stoyan's two appearances to the lyrics of Stanga being taken from a Bulgarian folk song, it's something that was not in focus in the rest of the world.

That said, Bulgaria's only qualifying song prior to 2016 is an experience to behold. While the lyrics are simply about Mitra meeting a lad riding a horse, the soundscape feels like you're in the surreal place yourself. You are in a rush against time, but you're also on a journey towards...somewhere.

Both the music and drumming really amplify the experience; seeing Elitsa and Stoyan drum together was a highlight for me. And while there are questions about Elitsa's vocals, including a point where she goes off-key, she still provides the necessary tone for this intriguing song.

Personal ranking: 4th/42 Actual ranking: 5th/24 GF in Helsinki

#187: Tose Proeski -- Life (North Macedonia 2004)

“Life is a book and you gotta read it Life is a story and you gotta tell it Life is a song and you gotta sing it You've got to know how to live it.”

For some curious reason, I prefer the English-version of this song to the Macedonian language one. Whereas this one, performed from Eurovision, focuses on the angst of existence and the importance of making the most of it, "Angel si ti" is an ode towards a lover who lines his streets with roses and even turns back time.

That's one of the things which work here that really shouldn’t. The mid-2000s sound, the lyrics, and the sheer angst of it. But for some reason, I really enjoy it. Tose (RIP) sings this really well, and it feels like a song out of a musical, in a scene where the protagonist cannot decide what they want to do with their life. It's awesome and I love this lots (and please, put this in a hypothetical Eurovision jukebox musical--there's so much plot potential!)

Personal ranking: 6th/36 Actual ranking: 14th/24 GF in Istanbul

#186: Lisa Andreas -- Stronger Every Minute (Cyprus 2004)

“My love grows stronger every minute And it won’t ever die You must believe I’ll always be there For you, all my life”

Greece and Cyprus are basically sisters in the contest--you can almost always expect them to give votes to each other considering the circumstances. However, their combined quality frequently varies, as well as results. 2004 was their best results year, though not necessarily their best in terms of songs (you'll get that later, towards the end)

At fifth place, Stronger Every Minute shared the best Cypriot entry ever with two other entries (one of which is #239, another coming soon) until 2018. This time, it comes in the form of a delicate love song, performed so tenderly and serenely by Lisa. Despite her looks making her look older than sixteen, she conveys a sense of innocence, helped by the glockenspiel and the acoustic guitar throughout.

I love how sincere she sings this “love letter”, as one blogger put it--I hope everyone can feel a love like this! A pure oasis in the flash and chaos of the 100% televote era.

Personal ranking: 5th/36 Actual ranking: =5th/24 GF (with Sweden) in Istanbul

#185: Paloma San Basilio -- La fiesta terminó (Spain 1985)

“La fiesta terminó Ya no hay más que niebla entre tú y yo ¿Para qué echar más leña arder Si el fuego se ha apagado ya?”

“The party’s over There’s only a fog between you and me Why throwing more wood to burn When the fire is already dull?"

Juan Carlos Calderon and Paloma San Basilio are really well known in their fields --the former is a noted songwriter who already wrote one of the biggest hits in Latin America, whereas the latter is a noted singer and theater actress who would win a Latin Grammy and play Evita.

Together, they have this really nice power ballad, albeit one with a bit of melancholy in it. The lyrics are the strong part of this piece, telling of a relationship that has come to an end using the party as a metaphor for it. It works very well, especially with Paloma's warm voice and the way she emotes the song through her hand gestures.

The resulting package is quite sad, yet very, very beautiful. Unfortunately, it didn't get the result it deserved (which maybe because of that backing vocalist picking at his nose...).

Personal ranking: 2nd/19 Actual ranking: 14th/19 in Gothenburg

#184: Sakis Rouvas -- Shake It (Greece 2004)

“I would trade my life for a night with you Driven by desire”

(Yes, this is already the third song from 2004 to appear in this section. haha. The first two that appeared here are fighting for my fifth, whereas the top four here is the exact same top four of that year.)

The first of the Greek Golden Era, we get Sakis Rouvas in all his glory. This was a hit when it was first released, and it at one point was the highest selling single of all-time in Greece. And as of 2021, it's still the highest-scoring Greek entry, despite them winning the following year.

While his regular discography doesn’t usually feature Greek elements, as he's better known for popularizing pop and rock influences in Greek music, I still think the bouzouki riffs do a good job here adding to this bop (the composer is Nikos Terzis--remember this name).

It's a dancefloor banger which I keep on repeat, and it seems that people across the continent have done so too! Especially those from Turkey. The performance is also quite fun, albeit with some...curious choreography (e.g. 1:42-1:46). That said, we also get some of Sakis' athleticism, thanks to him doing track when he was younger.

Personal ranking: 4th/36 Actual ranking: 3rd/24 GF in Istanbul

#183: Claude Lombard -- Quand tu Reviendras (Belgium 1968)

"Passent les semaines, se traînent les jours Et moi, j’attends ton retour En filant la laine dans mes beaux atours En bordant ma peine de doux fils d’amour"

"Weeks passing by, the days are lingering And I’m waiting for your return Spinning the wool in my beautiful finery Embroidering my pain in soft threads of love"

A couple of commenters compared to a Kate Bush song, and I think it comes down to Claude’s voice, which is very ethereal. However, Claude's voice has some depth, which, in comparison to Kate Bush's earlier work, is a bit more mature.

As for the song, it’s very folkloric but tragic, in which she yearns for the day her lover comes back. The use of strings helps in that it establishes a medieval ambience to it, but the overall feeling is still timeless. It’s almost as if one is caught into the story and wept along with her.

I especially love this because it stood out amongst the class of 1968--while most of the other songs has a happy-go-lucky vibe, Quand tu Reviendras goes in the opposite direction. Same with my runner-up.

Personal ranking: 1st/17 Actual ranking: =7th/17 (with Monaco and Yugoslavia) in London

#182: Doris Dragović - Marija Magdalena (Croatia 1999)

Maria Magdalena, gib mir deine Macht Für immer und nicht nur für eine Nacht

“Svjedok mi Bog, srca mi mog, Ova žena zna, da ti pripada sva...”

“As God is my witness, I swear by my heart, That this woman knows, she belongs to you entirely...”

(The first few lyrics were from the first Maria Magdalena from Austria, haha. Just wanted to mess with you. :) )

The second Marija Magdalena is a beloved entry in the fandom, and for good reason! It hasn’t aged since 1999, which shone amongst the relatively dull field with its mix of ethnic and dance music. Lyrically, it focuses on a love that redeems the narrator, hence the imagery related to Marija Magdalena (yay, religious imagery and redemption!). I think it works efficiently, and Doris performs well on stage with her powerful vocals and diva-like presence. Arguably, it's argued that it was the best song of 1999.

The only problem I have is with the backing vocals on the instrumental. The delegation cheated, and that’s the end of it. I’m still wondering why people would put this as their favorite of 1999 otherwise; even with the new rule about allowing them on the track. It puts me on edge on what would've happened had they won.

Beautiful song, but cheaters don't prosper in my book.

Personal ranking: 3rd/23 Actual ranking: 4th/23 in Jerusalem

#181: Evelin Samuel & Camille - Diamond of Night (Estonia 1999)

“Diamond of night, burning so bright Guide me my silvery new sign”

The last Eurovision song of the twentieth century is filled with mystical imagery, atmospheric instrumentation, and a beautiful violin solo. The whole thing reminds me of a fairytale, with a cool soundscape, though sometimes I feel like something is lacking in it (especially because it resembles some entries from the 1996 contest; I was thinking of I evighet when writing this)

The lyrics are especially pertinent for Evelin Samuel (the singer), who tried to get to Eurovision throughout the entire 1990s. She was about to go as one half of the Estonian duo from 1996, when she suddenly got a tour in Japan, which was then canceled. She managed to become a backing vocalist in 1997, and finally got her chance here. Seeing her sing "now i can say it's my time" is very touching, even if her eyes seem to be bulging out!

In the end, it's a peaceful and serene song, with hope for the new millenium. However, considering what the first song of Eurovision 2000 would be, little did one know it won't always start on the right foot...

Personal ranking: 2nd/23 Actual ranking: 6th/23 in Jerusalem