#if you saw me post this prematurely no you didnt
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Let's head to paradise, There's no happiness for us there, though. But if it's with you, we can fly together somewhere
Song Link
#gav fanarts#shtdn#agape#redraw of a vocaloid mv ig#the song fits him well#if you saw me post this prematurely no you didnt#ćșć°ç””
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omg hi i love your scream fics but i was wondering if you could write #23 from the prompt list for simon from fear street?? he is sooo underrated <3
more than a one night stand
ship: simon kalivoda x gn!reader summary: âjust once.â (x) warnings: reader gives a blowjob word count: 588
Just once, is what you had said.
You thought it was your last night on Earth, who could blame you? Dying a virgin would have been a total bummer. Simon had agreed, and so, you had lost your virginity to your best friend in a dirty school bathroom, not expecting to survive until sunrise.
And then you did. Simon did, too. And Kate, Sam, Deena, and Josh. Everyone lived.
And now, things were fucking awkward.
You kept finding excuses to not be alone with Simon, unwilling to talk about what had happened back at the school. You certainly werenât ready to confront the wetness in your underwear when you walked by the same bathroom later that week.
You couldn't avoid it forever, though. You and Simon both weren't fans of vulnerability, but the friendship was just too valuable to lose.
It was a Sunday evening when Simon showed up at your house, dangling his car keys with a shy smile, his silent way of inviting you on a drive.
How could you say no to that face?
His car played Radiohead quietly as you climbed into the passenger's seat, and he drove the short distance to the local park you two liked to smoke at.
"So," he said.
"So," you replied.
It was tense. You hated tense. It was time to rip the goddamn bandaid off.
"We thought we were gonna die," you said. "But...I don't regret it."
"Me either," Simon replied, a look of relief washing over his face. "And I...I mean, I wouldn't mind...doing it again, sometime. If you know, you wanted to. If not, that's fine, I don't wanna pushâ"
You shut him up with a kiss, leaning over the car's center console to cup his face in your hands.
"No condoms," he breathed after a bit of making out, sensing where your mind was heading.
"Then let me help you out with this," you said, hand reaching to cup the bulge in his jeans.
His needy moan and full-body shiver were adorable. You knew he wasn't going to last long if you did it, but you didn't care. It was weirdly endearing that he lacked stamina.
You had never sucked a dick before, but you understood the concept. No teeth, breath through your nose, it'll taste salty. It couldn't be too complicated.
Simon leaned his seat back, hands clumsily making work of the button and zipper as you took a deep breath, watching as he pulled out his cock, wet with precum and clearly desperate.
You bent down and experimentally licked along his shaft, swirling your tongue around the tip, tasting his precum and being surprised at how not disgusting it tasted.
He wasn't huge, but he wasn't small, either. You had seen Simon's cock before that night, accidentally walking into the bathroom or changing in the same room. It was bigger, better, up close, in your mouth, inside of you.
You had barely put his whole cock in your mouth before he came, clearly embarrassed, but you just grinned at him.
"Where'd you learn how to do that? I thought I was your first," he said, a teasing tone of faux-betrayal.
"You were! I just winged it," you responsed.
He scoffed. "Well, you are already a master at your craft."
Simon smirked as he cupped your jaw, bringing you in for a kiss.
"Your turn," he whispered.
Fucking your best friend turned out to be the best decision of your life, and you were glad it would be more than just one time.
#IF YOU SAW ME ACCIDENTALLY POST THIS PREMATURELY NO U DIDNT!!!!!!!!!#simon kalivoda x reader#simon kalivoda#fear street 1994#ophelia's fics
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top 5 worst westerns >:3
Michael Cimino's Heaven's Gate (1980)
Michael Cimino's Heaven's Gate (1980)
Michael Cimino's Heaven's Gate (1980)
Michael Cimino's Heaven's Gate (1980)
Michael Cimino's Heaven's Gate (1980)
Ok but in all honesty.
Michael Cimino's Heaven's Gate (1980)
Bronco Billy (1980)
Paint Your Wagon (1969)
The Return of Sabata (1971)
The Ridiculous Six (2016)
#if u saw this ask when i posted it prematurely.... no u didnt#lots of westerns are terrible but these are the extraordinary stinkers#some of them are bad in a fun way tho#bronco billy and return of sabata are both DEEPLY entertaining. i would gladly watch them a billion times#BECAUSE they are bad#but then theres fucking heavens gate#a film that fills me with unholy rage#for being so deeply unwatchable and miserable to sit through#trin im still debating how many of these i can show you in good conscience. is it humane ?#in the case of heavens gate it was not.#heaven's gate (1980)#bronco billy (1980)#paint your wagon (1969)#the return of sabata (1971)#the ridiculous six (2016)#westerns#đ€ #đ#asks#murderr
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tagged by @river-ocean to make my very own swag bill clinton! here are my Favorite Whole Albums and honestly? this array tells you everything you need to know about me. we have:
The Resistance by Muse (came out at the perfect time to rewrite my brain at age 13)
Raw Data Feel by Everything Everything (unbeatable bangers. jon higgs is right i AM afraid that im a pizza boy.)
Dead Man's Party by Oingo Boingo (i once listened to this album about 40 times in the span of two weeks. weird time in my life.)
Glass Houses by Billy Joel (its hard to pick just one billy album to put on here but its my favorite even if it isnt a grand slam like an innocent man or the stranger I COULD SAY MORE ABOUT BILLY BUT ILL STOP HERE)
tagging @maudlintrash @pipiteer @unabashedlycasualangel @hrhgeorgerussell @francophones
#tag meme#if you saw me accidentally prematurely post this twice in a row. no you didnt. river dont look at ur notifications.
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"or," her steps in the snow are heavy and precisely intentional so she doesn't slip again. docs are supposed to be good for this kind of thing, aren't they? "i could just move to los angeles where it never, ever snows and is sunshine and beaches and like, i don't know, movie stars all the time."
andie is not a winter person. for someone who's lived in new york her whole life, she's really bad at the cold months. she's cold and damp all the time and has to dig all of her turtleneck sweaters out of the back of her closet. they're itchy and leave her too stuffy indoors.
a gust of frigid wind blows past them and andie curls herself further into her jacket, one hand on her head to hold her beanie in placeâthe other still linked with clary. "maybe i stick with my shitty boots so that you have more reason to let me drag you to coffee when it's freezing outside," she grins over at clary. "besides, aren't docs supposed to be good? i wear them every year." which doesn't say much because she ends up on her butt in the snow most years... the idea of having to go out as lovebug tonight is killer.
clary didn't have any kind of special powers, but she'd always had pretty okay reflexes that had only gotten better helping out her younger sister. she saw the slick spot seconds before andie stepped on it and was ready to grab her when she started falling.
she gave andie's hand a gentle squeeze through gloved fingers. "yeah, ice will get ya!" clary exclaimed, laughing with her. her breath came out in white puffs in the cold air while she spoke and laughed. "we might need to find you some boots with more traction so you don't fall on your butt without me." she loved winter, always had, especially when she'd been living out of california and the winter required traveling to the mountains or even overseas to see snow.
#if you saw me accidentally post this prematurely yesterday no you didnt#heartsbreaking#AIN'T NOBODY IN THIS ROOM ALONE â threads#VOL 1: LOVE IS HERE TO STAY â main verse
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this is a post that is critical of tristamp, ignore if you dont want to see the late night ramble about what ive seen in the fandom
i still dont understand how tristamp only fans still justify hating the 98 series/thinking tristamp is better than it because "tristamp is more accurate to the manga" (making a post about it now because i saw someone say this once again)
like. no its not in the slightest, if anything 98 is actually closer to the manga. yeah tristamp may have included characters 98 didnt have, but tristamp is plot-adjacent to the original trimax plot even as a prologue because its already mixed up the original plotpoints too much for it to accurately follow the manga
like the steamer arc? it would not make sense to repeat it again to include neon and kaite. they would have to make an entirely new arc for that because it would feel repetitive to make another steamer episode with the bad lads when they already used it as a plot point for premature livio/ww character development.
plus tristamp has completely changed character dynamics and even personalities. example being millions knives, trimax knives and tristamp knives are not equals and i dont see tristamp knives ever being the same as trimax knives because they have changed him to always have been a cold character rather than the warm child trimax knives was originally. this is a major change to his entire character path and changes his fundamental character motives
tristamp introduced me to the trigun fandom and tristamp also made me dislike participating in a large part of the fandom because of tristamp being put on a pedestal as the golden child đ
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IF YOU SAW ME PREMATURELY POST SOMETHING ABOUT HOUND, NO THE FUCK YOU DIDNT-/LH
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sketjch
#if you saw me prematurely post#no you didnt#i deleted it in .2 seconds if u saw it thats ur faulkt#fault#clone wars#kit fisto#he#im watching the witcher while working on this#jaskier just showed up again#my main man
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~Tease Tuesday~
CW//NSFW
Just something soft today
đ
New top~ you dont want to know how long it took to fasten it
đ€
@sub-n-softcb Jongdae im not your kitty anymore im your demon *giggles*
đ±
Someone told me i looked good in red so~
đœ
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Tags: @demonxbot @kavengers-assemble @baileemitchell-oc @eppiesblog @mimintz @softie-for-u @sub-n-softcb jongdae <3 @girliebot @ur-oc @bbc-minji-oc @kitten-cb @emmylou-oc @jihan-oc @esmeralda-oc @roommates-bot @lovesickofyou @bunnybubkook @hellborn-ateez-cb @princeacademy-cb @atzotherworld-cb @kitten-cb @care-a-lot-kpop @annalisenoel @horrorgames-cb @chooseyourmingi @atzotherworld-cb @kpophogwartscb @sublixiechatbot @farnsocs @catboysbot @foxxbeomgyu @floristyujeong @foxpack-cb @hopelessromantic-juyeon @kitty-kafe @demonsf9 @rachel-oc (dm +/-)
#cw:nsfw#artistlyratalks#catlyratalks#streamerlyratalks#ravenclawlyratalks#admin: if you saw me post this prematurely no you didnt
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if you marry me, would you bury me? would you carry me to the end?
#if you saw me accidentally prematurely post this. no you didnt.#digital art#my art#ocs#deadly sins#hadriel#my ocs#cw blood#tw blood#cw death#tw death
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Hi hi, my college is killing me too, end of semester is always hard, stay strong!
Recently I triple crowned my Childe, he is my strongest along with Xiao, if you're up to it would you write his sagau reaction? I pampered him a little too much I think lol I dont regret it one bit he is strong jesus
Thanks! Take care, remember to take breaks from studying
I have yet to triple crown a character actually, haha!
(If you saw me post this prematurely no ya didnt I was tryna save it to drafts)
Xiao had always been strong. Always had to be, with how he was... raised? Yeah, raised.
But with you... you made his strength grow to heights he wouldn't have ever imagined.
One day, he felt a little pinch in his ear. He wined and touched the spot, only to find a bit of your blood--gold and silver and star-blessed--staining his fingers. It came with a small piercing, one of a crown, he later saw.
He felt it again soon thereafter, and wasn't shocked when he felt his power grow even more.
Being put on a team with the 11th Harbinger was not pleasant. The ginger constantly pestered him to spar, the Yaksha eventually snapping at him and showing him his superior strength.
Childe shut up for a few days.
When he felt that same prick, however, he asked Xiao what it was. Why was your blood on his fingers? You weren't even in Teyvat!
Xiao sighed very heavily and explained.
They were called crowns, and they happened when you decided to peak one of his three skills. Xiao, as far as any of the pulled ones knew, was the only one with two of the piercings, and even then he didn't make a show of them. Humble as ever, he was.
Oh how Childe wanted those damn crowns.
He worked his ass off to crit harder and harder, even beating out Xiao on occasion with his Vaporize 100k open-world hits. Xiao countered immediately by plunging 170k.
When they were both triple-crowned, however, they were at each other's throats, constantly trying to out-damage the other, but they actually helped each others damages without even noticing it.
They would definitely be competitive!
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Babysitting Aizawaâs 6... no 10 Nieces and Nephews
Hey There! Today we have the second part to the Aizawa fic I posted a few days ago! It can act as a stand alone so don't worry if you haven't read the first one! Ill try to post it here but I'm new at this. Also isn't much Shouta x you in this, just domestic fluff! More a set up for the loving in the next work, I hope you'll still read it anyway. Reader is neutral and I hope you all enjoy!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aizawa Shouta x Reader
Aizawaâs mom goes into the hospital for an emergency surgery and all his siblings turn to you to watch their kids, but you don't remember there names let alone their kids.
Words: 2610
Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You look a bit of mess currently. You were sitting at home in your pjâs with about 20 pictures scattered around you and 20 pieces of paper. You looked like one of those crazy conspiracies theorists. When in reality you were only trying to learn your boyfriend's familyâs names and likes, in preparation for Christmas of course. It was not going so well all you could remember was Saika was the eldest sister but which sister was she exactly? You looked between the two pictures on the table. None of the Aizawaâs age so that didnât give away and you couldnât remember if she had the long hair or the bob.Â
âGod help me.â You mumbled with a sigh as you threw your head back. By some great miracle a phone call pulled you from the task. Surprised to see it was Aizawa you picked it up with a smile.
âHey baby.â He said
âWhatâs up love? Arenât you in class?â You said a tiny bit concerned.
âShould be but my momâs going in for some emergency surgery, so me and my family are going up there.âÂ
âOh, are you alright?? Do you want me to come?â You rushed out to him
âNo, and Iâm fine. Itâs a fairly low risk surgery from what Iâm told. There is of course something you could do for me.â He said lowly
âAnd that would be?âÂ
âMy siblings need someone to watch their gremlins and I had the perfect person in mind.â He said with a light chuckle. You knew right away who this mysterious person was. Part of you wanted to say no because it was a lot of young kids but the other part of you knew you were gonna say yes. Even if he didnt say so, Aizawa was worried and he didnât need to be stuck watching the kids, none of them did.
âYes, of course! Tell your siblings to bring them to my place. I got a few toys from babysitting years ago.â You said getting up to get ready.
âYou're a lifesaver.â He said fondly
âSays the hero, I love you babe, everything is gonna be fine and of course be safe.â You told him
âLove you more, kitty cat. Youâll be great, see you when I get home.â He said hanging up. Well now you were panicking. How many kids were there again? What about their parents? You couldnât even remember their names. How are you supposed to greet them? Holy shit what did you get yourself into is all you could think as you rushed to clean your house. You were barely finished when the first knock came, you opened the door with a small smile.
âL/N!â A tall black haired man said. He looked like Shouta no doubt but he had an undercut and was taller.
âPlease call me Y/N.â You smiled at him.
âAww, you're too sweet! Seriously, how did Shouta end up with you?! Anyway, This is Haru and Jun, they are gonna be good little boys for you, right?â He paused as the boys nodded. âThank you so much we should all be back to pick the kids at 10!â He said as he started to leave. You waved him off and showed the boys in.
âAlright! So Iâve got a few toys and I think i've got all the cartoon channels. I want to make sure we get all your cousins here first before we do something really fun.â You said to the little boys who immediately went to sit on your couch and watch the cartoons that were playing. You let out a huge sigh of relief. It was done prematurely as a knock at the door was heard. You opened it to reveal his two sisters which was which you didn't know.
âL/N you sweet little lifesaver! This is the rest of them except Rei, Daisuke, and Maki. They all walk together from school, we let them know to come here so don't worry about walking to go get them. Also, only two of them are still in diapers so you should be fine! Thank you so much, love.â The shorter one rushed out before she left, pulling her sister with her. You looked done at the baby that had somehow got into your hands. Alright this one was obviously in diapers, the one grasping on to your pant leg barely standing up was probably the other one in diapers. Okay you were now surrounded by um.. 6 six kids, maybe more you weren't sure.Â
âOkay, now that we're all here, wanna play a game? It's really fun I promise.â You said with a cute little smile but you were lying. You only wanted them to introduce themselves and say who their parents were. You had no idea how to make it fun.
âWhat kind of game?â A little girl asked, wait you knew this one! She was the only young girl when you first met all the siblings, it was Nozomi, right?
âA ummâŠ. A⊠A scavenger hunt! Yeah! We're all gonna introduce ourselves and then get into groups by who your Mama's and Papaâs are and see who can find all the treasures first! Whoever wins gets a super cool prize.â You said hoping they didn't ask too many questions about the game you just made up. Which they didn't they all were giggling and saying incoherent things excited to play.
âWeâll go first since we're the oldest. Im Haru.â The tallest one with his hair pulled back into a ponytail said. âI is Jun! Our papa is Shiori! Can we play now??â The cute little blonde one said. Okay 2 down, Tall and hair pulled back is Haru, Small and blonde is Jun, they are both Shiori kids.Â
âOh us next, us next! I'm Tetsuya, that's Umi, my lil sister, and Yukio is the one on your pants. My mama is Shizumi!â The boy said. He was a cute pudgy boy with black hair that covered his eyes. Umi, the little girl had her dark blue hair in two pigtails on top of her head. Lastly the little boy holding on to your pants also had black hair but it was super curly.
âL/N, Oni-chans at school and Taiyo is too small.â Nozomi said with teary eyes. Okay so the one in your hand is Taiyo, another one of Saika kids. Okay you got this. You made it through all 7 kids, you would worry about the 3 at school later.
âIts alright me and you can be a team okay?â You said as she beamed up at you nodding. Alright with that you went to place the sleeping Taiyo on your bed. You left the door open so you could hear if he started to cry or moved around too much. You took a sheet and made a makeshift sling for⊠Yukio, right!Â
âOkay so there are 3 hidden treasures around the house! One is a pink treasure chest filled with jewelry and prizes. The other is a huge blue fluffy whale, be careful it may bite! Lastly, there are 2 little lions wandering sound, we gotta catch. I'm gonna get you guys nets of course! First one to get all of these things and show me them gets a super cool prize!â You said as they erupted into cute tiny roars!
âOkay here are your nets! May the best team win!â You smiled at them as they took off. You felt a little bad for the Aizawa cats you had just set up to be chased but something told you they wouldn't mind. They were always so attention hungry this would probably please them.
âOkay then, lets go Nozomi!â You said grasping the young girl's hand. You knew where everything was of course so you just followed her around. Only helping her when you heard kids getting close to the hiding spots or helping her try to catch the cat. You guys had been playing for about an hour now, only needing to catch the cats who caught onto the game and were running for their lives.
âKitty cat câmere!â Jun said as he chased the gray cat around.
âYeah! We jus wanna win.â Haru said following his brother. You laughed as the cat gently pawed at boys. Now that you were thinking about it there were so many boys in this family. Only 5 girls out of all these boys, Aizawaâs genes were strong for boys. You didn't get long to think before you saw a flash and heard a camera click. You turned to see 3 older children one with a camera.
âOh man, Uncle Shouta is gonna be so happy.â The girl said with a smile. She looked to be about 12 and was blonde, if you had to guess she was Jun and Harusâs older sister. There were two boys next her one was probably the oldest of all the kids.
âSorry for letting ourselves in, we were just knocking for a while and you didn't answer.â The older one said as they bowed.
âNo no it's quite alright! Sorry for not answering, my hands are a little full!â You said as you had Taiyo still slung around your back and Umi squirming in your hands.Â
âYeah, we can see that!â
âDaisuke! Rei! We gotta catch the kitties so I can win a prize.â Nozomi said, rushing off to her brothers. You made a mental note of who was who.
âOh no problem! Uncle shoâs cats are easy to catch.â Rei said and he was right, you just had to know how. He went over to the counter and got the cat treats and sprinkled a few on the floor. The cats came running and began eating as fast as they could. He then took the blanket/net and put it over the 2 cats and picked them up, they compiled so easily it was almost comical.
âOh! Yay! I wins right?? I get the prize!â She said dancing around you.
âYes you do! I should go get dinner ready but you can pick anything you want to take home.â You said booping her nose. She did a little gig before taking off like she knew what wanted.
âAlright, who wants to help with dinner!â You called to the kids you roared with agreement, racing to the kitchen
âOh you three would you mind helping and introducing yourselves?â You asked as you took out a few different ingredients.
âOh yeah! No problem! Im Daisuke, the eldest of all the Aizawaâs cousins. First year in high school actually! This is my little brother Rei, he is a middle schooler. Then the girl snapping pictures is Maki-chan sheâs the closest to my age! Oh, Saika is my mom and uncle Shiori is Makiâs dad. What can we do to help out.â He said with a smile.
âI think they said introduce yourself but whatever.â Maki mumbled kind of chest fallen. You only laughed and pointed out what they could do while you helped the kids and before long boom, dinner was done. You might have to convince Aizawa to have kids soon cause they were actually helpful. You all set the table and sat down to eat, almost forgetting about Nozomi.
âCan I have this!â She rushed to you holding a black cat plushie that had red eyes. Aizawa had given it to you when he went on a mission that pulled him from home for a month. You gave a small smile to her.
âOf course! I said you could have anything you wanted, I meant it. Let's eat right now then you can go snuggle and lay down.â You said moving to pick her up and help her to the table. Your table of course wasn't big enough so the big kids were in the living room, the younger kids ate with you and the babies you fed first were now napping. You let out a breath, it was 7:30. They should be done by 10:00 at the latest and the younger kids would be asleep by 8:30, so you could say you had this in the bag. Dinner was peaceful to your surprise and now you were all washing up and laying down on the makeshift beds you made in the living room. Maki was taking pictures as you had put all the younger children into your shirts, it was quite a sight to behold.
âAlright everyone lay down!â You yelled as you grabbed the youngest and began rocking him back and forth.Â
âWe is readyâ Umi said as she snuggled into her blankets
âReady for what?â You asked cautiously.
âWhen we visit uncle Shoâta he tells us âtories at nighty time.â Tetsuya slurred to you.
âOh, okay thenâŠ. Um. Once upon a time there was a pretty Pink cat, who lived in a kingdom full of all kinds of cats. One day he got curious and left the safety of his kingdom. He went into a forest and everything was fine until he bumped into a big huge black wolf. He wanted to run back into the safety of his kingdom but the icy glare of the wolf kept him still. The wolf slowly opened its jawsâŠ. Showing off its rows of bone crushing smile. The pink cat thought it was over for him until the Wolf smiled at him. âYour a little far from home, huh? Its okay I get lost sometimes! I can take you home.â The wolf said, her tail starting to wag. The cat didn't know what made him say yes but he did. He continued to say yes time and time again, long after they had become friends. He said yes so many times to the cat he thought he might run out of yesâs to give. But when the wolf asked him to leave the safety of his kingdom behind and run around the world with him, though it frightened him. He said yes again without hesitation. And that's how the pretty pink cat learned to fly.â You said, it was a cheesy story with no real plot but it worked. You looked around to see everyone sleeping even the bigger kids. You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. You looked at the lot one more time before you went to work on something you had been meaning to all day. You continued to work on it even as 10 oâclock hit and you said goodbye to the kids one by one. Only stopping when a familiar set of hands wrapped around your waist.Â
âWhatâs this, kitty?â Aizawa asked as he kissed your neck sweetly.
âAhh, nothing much! Just a family tree with pictures and the things about your family.â You said as you stated proudly at your work.
âOh that's sweet. I saw the pictures Maki took and that you let Nozomi have your cat, I know it was special to you.â He said nuzzling further into your chest.
âIt's fine, I told her she could have anything and to be honest, I'm wrapped around every single last one of themâs thumb and I would do anything for them so it really was nothing.â You said playing with his hands.
âGod, I love you, how did I end up with you? I mean god I just love you. Let's get in bed. I wanna cuddle you, Right. Now.â He said turning you around and picking you up.
âYes, sir.â You said clinging to him like a koala.
âOh and babe, you got Shizumi and Saika mixed up.â He said into your hair.
âGOD DAMMITâ
#aizawa shouta x reader#aizawa x you#aizawa x reader#aizawa imagine#bnha aizawa#aizawa shouta#my hero academia aizawa#mha x reader#bhna x reader
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anyways forever late... bake off ep 5
- anyways idk ive been deprssed as FUCK again i havent been able to watch bakeoff . fucking mento illness. but anwyays here we go
- also . this is so premature. i saw ppl gushing abt peter again and idk im jsut filled with rage. idk wht it is abt him tht i hate SO much....... i think its just all the praise hes getting when tbh. i havent been wowed by anything hes done. no offence peter. u have a smug little face. sick of it all.
- wait.... was i mad bc he stole sb from sura in ep 1. i think so.
- probabyl that.
- god i miss sura im so mad shes gone im so SAD shes gone . fuck it all and i think i know who leaves this ep sick of how i get spoilt so easily i like the bakeoff page on fb and i rarely check fb just for my unifessions page and they always jsut post spoilers. tired of it.
-OHW AIT. I FORGOT. HERMINE IS STILL HERE. I THINK. I HAVENT HEARD WHISPER OF HER BEING BOOTED. i hope she stays omg i lvoe her so much
- ok so cornish pasties first off??? thts weird like. I GET IT but also u kno... how much variation cn they do on those??? other than pastry designs?? and even thn like.... the kinda pastry u use for cornish pasties puff up and lose shape easily like hmm and huhhh?
- oh
- wAIT YOU JSUT MAN... PASTIES IN GENERAL . LIKE WHY DIDNT U SAY THT. FUCKIN LAURA OUT HERE WITH A CHEESE AND ONION. am i stupid i thought cornish pasty specifically meant,.... well cornish pasty and i thoguth it did come with some slight variations but tht it wa smostly same y hence the confusion like
-Â hermine it looks very delicious i believe in you
- im literally so sorry lottie i like u and ur cute but this is the most rancid british bullshit i have ever seen
- mashed potato in a fucking pasty im going to die with the SAGE an all and the gravy. i cna just FEEL it coagulating and clogging up in my mouth bc u KNO bitish mash is just. rancid. and all of that with fucking pastry encompassing it yuck . its like tht fucking pie bap from the wigan place where ur just fighting layers of stodge and shit .
- this truly is hole less. nobody who serves me this is getting any hole ever
- of course youâd think it would sound nice paul i swear to FUCK youâd eat fucking mud from the ground and cry abt it being spicy u rancid little worm of a man
- nevermind i hate peterâs too
- literally FISH AND RICE itâd be so dry  . is this ONLY ME. IS IT ONLYme tht can imagine just biting into it and it jsut being......... flavourless and dry. am i insane. maybe i literally just have had bad experiences with haddock or whatever idk i dont remmeber wht tht shit taste like. rice is lush but idk abt it in a pasty like i really think u need sth else in there to help it or else its just so... idk man im just not sure if am a fan
- 4 MINUTE AD BREAKS. ARE YOU CLOWNS.... AM I AC CLOWNS. THIS IS SICK AND TWISTED, BAKE OFF.
- also fucking. there is something SO evil abt amazon releasing the corona flavoured adverts holllly shitttt<3
- cactulaly i like. get 0 exposure to adverts nowadays. i dont have a tv & i wouldnnt watch it if i did. and obvs mst of the time i have adblock on. so like.... so like.... i was PROTECTED but now i have 2 see all the rona based ads... oh my GOD i hate it
- also what did i tell u peter. its DRY . ofc IT WOULD BE DRY. youve just got rice in a fucking pastry with FISH . ITâS BONE DRY. UGH
- LITERALLY WHY IS EVERYONE .... BC I SAW IT EVERYWHERE ELSE TOO. PPL ARE GOING ON ABT HOW PETER IS SO GOOD AT EVERYTHING WHEN LITERALLY. SINCE WEEK 1 WHEN HAS HE BEEN THAT GOOD? LIKE THEY ALWAYS HYPE HIM UP BUT THN DURING JUDGEMENT THEYRE LIKE âawh well its actually not tht good :(â BUT DONT MAKE A FUSS ABT IT
- (meanwhile not 2 call racism again but is aw a load of ppl blasting hermine and saying she was terrible... when literally shes been doin so well. she knocked it out the park again here. ofc she did<3)
 - OMG
- FOGGY
- also literally hwy are u all putting RICE in ur pasties like. tht might be a thing but surely you would need to compensate with a load of sauce and flavour like.............. another dude. the dude i keep forgetting . dave. is it dave. idk he is literally the one tht WILL NOT stick in my mind the most forgettable shaped man. sorry dave. angyways like i dont think itd be terrible but like i said doesnt i need... sauce  and a LOT of it
- HOLY SHIT THIS TECHNICAL IS A DISASTER
- IM EVERYONE JUST EATING HSIT
- GOD LINDA IM SO SORRY
- IM SO SO SORRY LINDA
- âNOT BAD EFFORTâ HEY PRUE? THESE WERE THE FIRST ECLAIRS THAT WERENâT
 -i i really hope hermine does well in showstopper sheâs really on road to starbake
- CAGED TARTS. ME IN LOCKDOWN.
H.. HOW ARE OU PLANNIGN ION DOING THIS LOTTIE
literally i wish rowan was here JUST for this challenge . he wouldnt be able to do it but, like, daveâs âlouvre inspired tartâ ......... weâre getting big rowan vibes from it all. heâd do something stupid and extra (or try to)
OMG
PASTRY SNAIL1 PASTRY SNAIL!
okay travis marcelroy (cant believe it took me this long to think of tht one) thats kinda funny
- UH HEY BAKE OFF ARE WE JUST GONNA KEEP SAYING THW WORD G*PSY? OKAY. I FUCKING GUESS
- âUPMARKERT TARTâ MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE<3
- oh no
- TRAVIS MARCELROY YOU R BOTTLE
- hey
bDONT SHOW ME AD S LIEK THIS I DONT LIKE IT I DONT LIKE IT SCARY
-Â NMARC ITS SO PRETTY......
 - come on HERMINE PU;L IT HOME LETS GET YUO STARBAKER GIRL ITS WHAT YOU DESERVE
- THE
- IM
(starts to see red)
- linda im so so sorry. man. this sucks
- BUT LOTTIE POP OFF I GUESS
- they just RIPPED into travis marcelroy huh
- .
- L... LAURA?
- UOU GAVE S GTABRBAKER OTO ALRUAU?
- IM SEEING RED. IM ACTUALLUY SEEING FUCKING RED
- HERMINE...
LAURA CAME SO LOW DOWN IN THE FUKCING TECHNICAL
- HERMINE CAME SECOND AND SHE DID AMAZING IN THE SIGNATURE AND SHE DID SO WELL IN THE FUCKING SHOWSTOPPER HER BASE WAS JSUR A LITTLE THICK ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME ARE YOU ALL FOR FUCKING REAL WHAT EVEN WAS LAURAâS FUCKING SIGNATURE AGAIN ID ONT REMEMBER DO YOU KNOW WHY BCAUSE IT WAS FORGETTABLE, WORTHLESS, I SIMPLY DO NOT CARE IM LIVID WHO WHY WHAT AND WHEN THIS IS
- THIS IS JUST
- IM AT MY FUCKING WITS END
- YOU..........................................................
- HERMINE ROBBED. FUCKING R O B B E D. THIS IS FOUL THIS IS VILE IM LITERALLY ENRAGED IM SO MAD IM NOT FINISHINGT HIS EP I KNO LINDA EATS IT OF SHE DOES IM SO MAD IM SO MAD
#egg.txt#I WANTED 2 STICK WITH BAKEOFF THIS YEAR BUT#i got spoiled again and i know my missus leaves and im saaad#all my faves jsut got knocked tf out. sick of it all#gbbo liveblog#JSUT FINISHED IT#FURIOUS
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The Right Train
All he could think about was getting out of wet oxfords and drowning a few ice cubes in warm bourbon. The sidewalk was silvered with a cold rain and everyone walked with such purpose and intent, âsheepâ he thought to himself before turning his foul spirit on the weathermen who allayed his galoshes. The thought of them dry and warm in the front hall made him chuckle to himself as he squished persistently onward.
It had been years since he had ridden on a train, the novelty having far worn off during trips back and forth into the city for college classes a decade earlier. It was a different sort of hurry back then, a little less serious, unlike his company on this street. Higher learning aside it was a blown head gasket that brought him into the sea of mass transit. As he navigated through an awkward portico of terraced umbrellas he wondered if he might have gone by his stop, a cold air momentarily ruffled the colorful patchwork of temporary canopies and he saw his off ramp. Just another block. Tucking his paper tightly under his arm he pictured himself taking the hand off in a bowl game and following his left guard as he parted this ugly, moist defensive line into the end zone where they would high five eachother on the platform.
As he approached he realized that it all looked as it did ten years ago save a few coats of paint and some updated âNo Smokingâ signage. Even just a few weeks ago there would have been a cavalcade of coeds languidly laying in the grass in the autumn sun pontificating while waiting for the right train to shudder to a halt. There would always be someone with a guitar plucking out a love song to a faraway lover or swooning the next. He hoped they knew to savor those moments because in a flash they would find themselves with a blown head gasket and wet oxfords.
He had made good time despite the weather and found a dry corner through the grumbles and sighs. As he surveyed his freight hopping compatriots he thought how odd it was that you could be surrounded by so many people and yet feel so alone? Blue screens and wires and buzzing and humming pockets and purses had taken the place of pleasantries and conversation. What other worlds were they visiting, what magic was behind those little windows that left them incapable of a âhelloâ or a âpardon meâ much less talk about the weather. There was always a camraderie in besmearching the weather men although nobody today was up for commiserating. Popping his collar he sunk into his own world and thought about his bourbon.
The train finally appeared out of the fog and with a series of groans and screeches it shook the platform stage. It would at least be heated and provide protection from the elements. Chaos ensued as the doors flung open, a telltale of civilization, a crumbling expose in this brief dichotomy. Wanting nothing to do with jostling and medieval-esque melee he waited patiently for civilty to regain its grasp and walked simply into the steel carapace. He did not anticpipate being able to find a seat although he tunneled the best he could to find at least an unimposing position.
Walking the aisle towards the back of the car he was met with cold stone faces, as if they had been riding these trains forever and he was intruding, some secret club that he was not invited. A few steps further, appearing out from under an extended arm hanging from a grab rail he was halted by a female passenger in the window seat. She had a ruddiness in this sea of soggy ghosts, a flush despite the cold. There was an older woman in the aisle seat staring straight ahead and clutching a purse in her lap, she grumbled something as he posted up next to her, water from the brim of his hat finding her disapproval. The commotion was enough that the girl looked up at him and smiled with summers azure eyes, it immediatley warmed him although was short lived as she adjusted in her seat and went back to her phone while the remaining eyes of coal worked on the back of his neck.
The train lurched to life and rythmically the crowd swayed in unison from the inertia. The ties began to groan and settle into crushed stone as we moved down the line. A few patented announcements which he could not hear, something about terminals and upcoming construction and he found his mind going back to the girl as they bounced and swayed down the tracks.
She was wearing a plaid skirt, long opaque legs emerged from the hem line settling into low heeled brown leather boots, surely German or Romanian. She was turned toward the window and he could see a delicate chemise top reflected in the window with every flickering light as they rolled through crossings. She was working fervently on her phone, must have been some argument or heated discussion with someone as she had a difficult time keeping still, she moved in her seat as if it was electrified. He tried staring forward with the rest of the zombies although he could not look away from this striking creature.Â
Approaching the next stop the older lady began to assemble her belongings and zip and button flaps and folds, she was getting off. He surveyed the competition and positioned himself in such a manner to be able to slide into the seat the moment her round rear end left the seat. The only flaw in his plan was a slovenly looking fellow slightly forward of him. If the old lady stood up and turned to pick up her bag he would have no chance - his only hope was that she just stood up and walked forward.Â
The speaker came to life and announced; NEXT STOP BRAN CASTLE ROAD and a few other people had begun to notice the signifigance of the old ladies departure and the potential of an open seat although it was too late for them, there was only one spot and he was determined to find himself next to her. The next sequence of events happened so fast, so calculated it would have left army planners in awe. The moment the train applied its brakes the briny crowd leaned forward, Mr. Slovenly made his move although it was premature, she was only moving with the braking, he knew he messed up. She stood and he grabbed her bag, handing it to her in a manner that moved her into Mr. Slovenlyâs path - she grasped the bag in a huff and walked right into Mr. Slovenly, a varsity high school basketball pick move that made all those wind sprints worthwhile. He plopped himself down in the seat and settled in for a little gloating while Mr. Slovenly grumbled.
With 6 stops ahead if him he knew he might just have a fleeeting chance at talking to her, maybe getting the name of her perfume yet there wasnât much beyond whatever was captivating her on her phone. Her delicate fingers worked in such precision pounding out missives after every little buzz. After a series of successive buzzes she let out a little giggle matched with a squirm. He began to feel a heat, he loossened his collar thinking he might be finally warming up but that wasnt it, it was her. She wasnât in some argument she was being seduced, her lover, her husband a new suitor it did not matter. It was unmistakable now, he knew there was no chance of extracting her from this trance, she was on fire. With each successive buzz she would shift in her seat, words from somewhere were moving her hips, her spine, her breath, her head. This train held no match to the tempest in her, the aching inside, she was desperate while the buzzing phone added to her buzzing. He thought about the lucky prick on the other end of the phone, what magic he was capable to have her melting out here in public. He was envious. As this dance continued she became more animated, tossing her firey red hair back with a twist of her neck. Her feet never stopped moving as she crossed and uncrossed her legs. She was trying to unleash this thing right here although she must have known that their would be no privacy for such an event. No escaping those eyes of coal.Â
His endeavor changed, he knew he could not leave her here writhing, he knew that ache and he grinned deviously at the thought. He knew she was going to need some measure of privacy. He shifted in his seat and took his coat off. Snapped the rain off in the aisle and turned to her, covering her fevered lap with his thick wool overcoat. He reached up and cracked the window above her head letting in all the sounds of the driving rain and the street and the thunder of the tracks. He then produced the paper and with a skilled snap held it wide open shielding her from prying eyes.Â
It didnt take her long to realize what he was doing, she settled in and found a ryhtmn as the world flew by under their feet. He could feel her moving, finding an edge, building a crescendo, talented fingers under cotton and denier applying just the right touch, a conductor yielding a baton. He knew she was close, he could feel the heat, she reached out from under his coat and squeezed his leg and it was like a pulsing of static electricity. She whimpered and he would cough to provide cover and this went on for what felt like minutes, she finally let go of his thigh and began to come back into herself in quickend breaths.Â
With her soul calmed he folded up the paper and reached up and closed the window. He pulled his coat up over her languid body as she slowly recovered. He stared straight ahead with a smile and an ache now growing in his loins.Â
A few more stops went by and she sat up in her seat, checked the time and felt around for all her belongings. When the train finally ground to a halt she stood up, he went to stand to allow her out and she stepped over him, for a moment straddled his thigh with a nyloned leg. She smilled at him and lifted herself over his legs...she hung there for a moment before producing those delicate fingers from her coat and touched them to his lips. He inhaled dramatically filling his head with her floral sex. She mouthed the words âthank youâ and with that she was gone.Â
He sat there in a trance trying to process everything that just happened, her scent still hanging in the air, thankful for a blown head gasket and finding the right train.
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jenkai discourse in retrospection
 (long post)
to take a slightly more light hearted break from all the updates regarding the burning sun case, I propose a discourse of jxk in retrospection after gaining all the new knowledge exposed by the media recently
dont read if you dont want to, if you read please dont come attack me for posting what I want on my own blog đ„°
In no way is what I type facts, and I am NOT comparing burning sun case with jxk (jxk is so insignificant and jxk is not a criminal case) yet I will make references to what the media and companies are capable of doing as proven by the exposure from the b. sun case regarding similar behaviours.
---
we now know that the kpop world is not what some once thought - an ideal fairytale land where idols/ the media never lie to us.
The truth:
We finally realize for sure that in korean ent. industry, sexual favours (in exchange for sponsors, promotion via media manipulation, basically fame and safety), offering prostitutes services... all in all using SEX is commonly used in return for connections / power / protection from the 'higher ups'.
why did jxk happen?
I propose: to cover yg x jni sex/sexual activities and jni has sponsors rumours (updated). After knowing yg is to a certain degree (personal assumption: large extent) involved in B.Sun and gangnam clubs, it makes sense to suspect that the jni rumour could be real. look up yg's past history, how he obtained his wife (emphasis, obtain). 12 years older yg 'fell in love' the moment he saw his wife as a second year middle school girl, recruited her at 16, ruined her career and married her. who knows how exactly yg treats his younger girl employees? Who is there to protect them?
but its just a 'groundless' rumour why was yg desperate?
to propose reasons: 1) it could be real, if so he HAS to camouflage it before it blows up further. 2) even if its not real, he didnt want to put bp's and his own name's reputation at stakes since bp is his most money earning group right now 3) if he doesnt make a deal with dispatch, who ofc are capable of digging deeper and they hate yg (proven by their ability to obtain kkt chats and exposing b.sun evidences) to supply them a fake scandal to cover ygxjni... dispatch WILL expose him. (also keep in mind jni has other sponsor rumour that might or not be true). and 4) - suggested by anon: yg could be taking precautions before b.sun scandal blows up. As we know b.sun revolves around sex crimes, Yg must get rid of the 'boss had sex with employee' label before b.sun blows up. Or else he will get dragged, it would be like adding oil on fire.
this theory is reinforced by allshitpop stating a media outlet discriminately announced 'the yg x jni rumour was false.' why purposefully mention it when no one asked?
but why ji?
main reason: hes an artist from sm. Yg desperately needed a scandal impacting enough to satisfy dispatch (releasing small unconvincing sandals will discredit dispatch's liability and reputation. ) But what to do when none of yg's male artists are popular enough to create a fuss nor any male groups's careers mature and stable enough to withstand the scandal pressure from the general public? the obvious solution is ofc to beg other big companies - sm or bighxt.
Most popular boy groups atm is still btx and ekso. honestly yg wouldve prefered btx due to their crazy fame, and jni will be their first dating scandal... the reactions would be DRAMATIC. yet in contrast to ekso, btx didnt really need to take that risk in hopes for more popularity. (rmb there would always be adverse effects when being involved in a dating scandal despite positive reactions and large no. of supporters). Also, even if btx has any scandals to cover, bighxt's recent merge with cj-enm (described as 'a powerhouse' aka very huge powerful company) means btx's any potential scandals can be taken care of for now. so that leaves ekso.
Who in ekso fits ji's image the most?
(hence will recieve 'positive' reactions and make them more aesthetically believable. without a doubt, its ji and his on going promoted sex appeal.) Reasons for ji and not other members: 1. theres no harm in giving him a beard (personal belief, ignore point 1. if you think homosexuality/kaisoo pairing isn't plausible) 2. to raise his popularity for his potential upcoming solo. 3. if someone who was involved in dating scandal before came up again, they probably predicts the pairing to be more positively recieved --> more supportors and a more hyped response from the public.
but none of that happened, the scandal was managed poorly. The paris evidence was made in a rush (dates didnt match) park pictures were too ambiguous (again dates and time didnt match), even when dispatch posted a pic of ji in a carpark supposedly came back from hawaii to give jni presents after landing - we learned from ji's own ig live that the day he wore the outfit in the photo, he had already returned to korea a few days ago, was around town shopping and went no where near the airport. Besides these failed attempts there was absolutely no other proof that jxk is real.
why was it poorly managed?
bc this is a rare collab between two big rival companies. Yg was the one begging at the start yet sm wasnt able to take full control of this scandal. Conflicts and disagreements upon makng many decisions were highly likely to occur between these two rivals.
The break up
a lot of fans were shocked when jxk broke up just after 25 days. (brand new record). what else is weird?
sm personally confirmed jxk broke up abruptly. Usually when couples break up, fan rumours start to float around first. But not this time, no rumours surfaced yet sm all of a sudden definitively stated that jxk broke up. Back then I already predicted it maybe because yg or bp got into trouble hence sm wanted to distance themselves as far as possible. I still stand by that idea.
Sm must get away from yg and b.sun case for the sake of theirs/ekso's reputation. sm def dont want to be dragged into the mess. Remember, sm as a huge company themselves def have their own dirt to hide, getting dragged means huge consequences if the investigators target them.
so why did sm agree in the first place? I assume its bc altho sm knew that yg had dirt to hide, they did not know it was something as serious, severe and big as b.sun case / tax evading case. Therefore, what are the coincidences that sm announced breakup shortly before dispatch sparked reinvestigation into b.sun by posting crucial evidences? (the first chats)
its highly possible that dispatch warned sm, (which makes them sound like the good guys but no. remember sm is dispatch's source of money and partnered with them many times. b.sun indeed aint directly related to sm, (as for now) dispatch has no reason to ruin sm) Or, sm could have found out through other sources that b.sun case will blow up soon. they quickly cut their collab with yg early, and announced break up probably without telling yg first. (since telling them possibly means giving dispatch away).
this also suggests that dispatch hates yg but anyway.
The benefits of ji
Comparing the two, jni seems to be the one who gained more from the scandal. She got most of media and the public's attention. there is an explanation for this - shes the 'rookier' one, and the trendier one out if the two since bp is still rising when ekso has reached their plateau. However, ji did gain his own lesser share of attention (indicated by the gained followers on his ig).
I have always said that when idols agree to be involved in a scandal, they are likely to get a 'reward.' but now thinking about it, agreeing to scandals is part of ji's contract, rewards are bonus but not obligations. Besides, the scandal itself supposedly helps ji gain popularity for solo and gains a beard, sm didnt NEED to give him more bonus. Often when idols get more modelling jobs / solo etc after scandals is bc sm uses the risen populairty from scandal as an opportunity to maximise profit by giving them more jobs, it might not be bc sm wants 'pamper' them.
Plan cut short
unfortunately for ji who is not getting his solo soon, the jxk plan flopped due to poor management, and was cut short due to b.sun case. The scandal did not fulfill what it was supposed to do and ended prematurely . Followed by the apparent troubles in sm negotiating contract terms with ekso, (delayed ekso schedules),chxn suddenly getting a solo, and the blowing up of b.sun case, ji might have missed his chance again. Or hes simply still preparing.
to summarize i want to clarify a few things.
- none of these are facts, but an overall picture forming one huge speculation.
- I dont try to defame bp or shame them. i also am not trying to state that girl artists def had sex with the hihgher ups. b.sun has shown us that men always have more power over women, and they rarely get protection.
- I want people to realize the dark side of kpop. The kpop industry is full of conspiracies, media manipulation and lies. What you see on tv is not who your idols are portrayed to be on camera. Don't impose your ideal vision on them and hurt others when reality suggests otherwise.
side note: this theory conveyed reinforcement to statements I've made before
- conspiracies are real and true. Look at all the dark and shady events involved in b.sun case
- media play, mass manipulation exist and are common practice.
- dispatch and sm collab and are partners on a case by case basis.
- idols lie on interviews all the time, their tv persona is different from the real them.
- companies offer protection for their idols
- it is indeed common practice to use one scandal to cover another
ANYTHING can happen in the world of the k ent industry. dont lightly dismiss any possibilities. We must analyse the sum of the situations - the full picture of any events before believing anything we are told.
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Gift Fic for FoxHughesArt ~Â âPDA at the DPDâ
My very good friend FoxHughesArt just posted their first Reed900 artwork and was kind enough, since they knew Reed900 is my fandom love, to share the WIP with me before they posted the final piece. I was so inspired, I had to write something for them and this is it.
Alex ~ thank you so much for chatting with me over the last couple of months. For letting me chatter on when Iâm sad and letting me do the same for you. Your art is lovely and inspiring ~ Just like you. đ
âPDA at the DPDâ
As they walked into the DCPD, Nines felt anticipation. Â
Gavin had once told him this particular part of his day was better than his morning coffee. Â They would get up, feed the cat and carry about getting ready for work as any working partners might do if they found themselves staying over with one another. Â But the moment they found a vacant elevator, there was electricity in the air between them.
Gavin liked a bit of pretense and Nines indulged him in this, because it seemed to end in benefit for them both.
âFuckinâ thing follows me everywhere.â Gavin said annoyedly to the officer who checked them through the security gate. Â Nines remained silent, watching, as usual. Â Gavin turned to him. Â âWhat are you looking at RoboPrick?â
âA middle aged man with a smoking addiction, foul mouth and a receding hairline.â Nines replied simply. Â He saw Gavin blush, his eyes narrow and Nines felt a small twinge of victory at catching the Detective off guard. Â He enjoyed teasing him and found Gavin liked to be teased in more ways than just verbally. Nines opted to walk through the terminal, ignoring Gavin as he did and it had the calculated effect. Â He could feel Gavinâs eyes on him as they came to the elevator doors and he felt static run through his skin.
Nines stepped inside and felt Gavinâs eyes watching him still as he turned and casually pressed the button that would take them to the homicide department. Â The Detectiveâs heart rate was elevated and that made his bio components hum sweetly. The moments ticked by as the doors slowly shut and the moment they did the two found themselves tangled in one another.
Gavin pushed Nines against the wall, kissing him deeply with a measured grin on his face. Â Nines let him lead, because it seemed to please him so early in the morning, but he also knew once they were done for the day it would be Gavin submitting to him.
And they loved their routine⊠Oh yes.
âDid you really mean that shit about my hair?â Gavin asked in between deep, messy kisses. Â He was grinning though, good humored about the jab at his ego.
âOnly about 84 percent.â Nines replied and Gavin pulled back to narrow his eyes at him. Â Nines only leaned in and whispered against his swollen lips âAny hair loss can probably be attributed to me, Detective.â Nines continued as he wound his fingers into Gavinâs hair and pulled back, getting a startled gasp, then grin from him as he leaned down and kissed him slowly and calculating.
âKeep that shit up an weâll be-â Gavin began, but was cut off as the elevator stopped prematurely.
Without warning, the elevator doors opened and they were able to right themselves before an interloper from another floor stopped their progress. Â Nines was able to easily compose himself, but Gavin looked so flustered the officer who entered had given him an odd look.
âWhat the fuck you looking at?â Gavin had barked, face reddening further. Â The man turned away and the three stood awkwardly as the elevator ascended again.
Nines cast his eyes sideways and saw Gavinâs hand mere inches from his own. Â A new idea formed and he reached out to take hold of it, only for Gavin to snatch it away. Â Nines raised an eyebrow at him and noted Gavin looked annoyed, shaking his head at him, then indicating the officer in front of him.
Gavin waited till the officer exited to his floor and the elevator began its ascension before turning to Nines.
âDonât do shit like that in front of people.â
âIâm not allowed to hold your hand or Iâm just not allowed to do it in front of co-workers now?â Nines asked and felt annoyed either way.
âWe work here. Â Itâs unprofessional.â Gavin mumbled, face still red from the make out session they had just had. Â Â Nines narrowed his eyes at him.
âYou didnât seem to share this same opinion a moment ago when you were letting me sample the coffee from the back of your tongue.â Nines replied and felt a small victory at the vivid blush that overcame the Detectiveâs face at these words.
âThatâs different. Â No one can see us in here.â
At this, Nines stared at him pointedly, but Gavin was avoiding his eyes now.
A part of Nines knew, of course, that this shouldnât be bothering him near as much as it actually was. Â This was their workplace, after all and public displays of affection werenât exactly encouraged. But a simple hand hold behind a personâs back who wouldnât even notice?
He thought often about moments like this one where he was denied simply because it proved inconvenient for the Detective. Â No matter his own personal wants. Â Heâd caved in pursuit of a happy medium, because he knew that Gavin wouldnât. Â He never did. Nines was tired of it.
Gavin mustâve noticed the shift in mood, because he leaned forward and put his hand to Ninesâ face to draw him back to him. Â Nines only stared, unaffected when Gavin leaned in and tried to kiss him.
âIâm sorry, Detective. Â But as a place of business, such actions would be highly inappropriate.â Nines said evenly, almost robotically.
âAre you serious?â Gavin asked as he pulled back a ways. Â But the answer was plain as day on Nines face. âWhatever.â
Gavin turned and shoved his hands into his jacket pockets as they made their way to their floor. Â Once the doors opened he didnât even wait for Nines as he stepped out. Â Nines figured Gavin might throw a tantrum about this, as he usually did when he didnât get his way, but there was no way he was going to be the one to cave this time. Â In fact, as he saw Connor walking over to him, he decided that there was a much better alternative at hand.
âEverything okay, Nines?â Connor asked, side glancing Gavin who walked by him without a word.
âOf course. Â Do you have a minute? Â Iâd like to go over a case with you before I get started on my own daily briefing.â
âSure thing.â Connor replied, but Nines knew that Connor was onto him. Â This was a Gavin code between them, meaning he needed to discuss the Detective or needed help with something regarding him. Â They would huddle at Connorâs desk, pouring over some random file, but would converse inside their heads. Â If Gavin suspected as much he never said. Â Only Hank seemed to catch on.
âYou guys working on a GV200 error?â Hank asked with a smirk as he sat back in his chair.
âGV600 actually.â Connor replied with a grin.
âShit. Â That bad huh? Â I donât want to know how high up that number can go.â Hank said as he turned to look at Gavin. Â He was working at his terminal, but he was obviously stewing over their conversation. Â
[RK800]: You do realize he might be very angry at you about this later?
[RK900]: Heâs much more fun when heâs riled up.
[RK800]: Be sensible. Â You could just try discussing this like adults.
At this, Nines leaned back in his chair and looked towards Gavin.
âExcuse me, Detective. Â Could I speak with you for a moment?â Nines called across the bullpen. Â Gavin didnât reply, only put up his middle finger at them. Â âItâs very important.â Nines continued and Gavin set down his coffee so his other hand was free to flip him off with both hands. Â Nines turned to Connor, knowing he proved his point.
[RK800]: Plan B then?
[RK900]: Plan B it is.
Nines knew the Detective well enough and despite his hard persona, he was weak for specific things and Nines was one of them. Â He also knew that Gavin didnât believe anything that he could not emotionally feel. Â If he wanted him to be the first to cave, then heâd need to remind him of what he was missing. Â A plan began to formulate and, despite the very real chance Gavin would be even angrier at him, the other possibilities of what could come of this were so enticing that Nines could not consider any other alternative.
After conversing a bit with Connor, Nines moved to his designated seat and began his morning briefing via terminal. Â No sense in slacking off work. Â He felt Gavin watching him, trying to capture his attention, but opted to ignore him. Â After a time, paperwork was dropped off on his desk and he took the opportunity to finally address the Detective.
âMay I borrow a pencil, Gavin?â Nines asked as he looked up to find Gavin tapping away furiously at his phone. Â The manâs eyes moved from the screen to his and narrowed, but he opted not to answer him. Â Although cute, Gavin could never play this game quite as well as Nines did. Â âToo bad, I guess youâll have to finish this paperwork entirely on your own.â
âYou have arms, donât you? Â Get it yourself asshole. Â Iâm busy.â Gavin grumbled as he let his eyes go back to his phone.
Nines couldâve simply reached across his desk, over to Gavinâs, and plucked a pencil out of its holder. Â It was within his reach, but an idea was forming, so Nines instead stood and walked around the desk to stand behind Gavin. Â He leaned down, reaching his arm out over the Detectiveâs shoulder as the side of his face lightly touched the helix piercing on the back of his ear.
He felt the Detective tense, as he knew Gavin would, considering he often reacted to Nines playing with this piercing under both leisure and intimate circumstances. Â If Gavin wanted to object he could have, but he sat still.
âI thinkâŠ,â Nines stated in a low voice right next to Gavinâs ear. âHmmmâŠ,â He continued, letting the rumble of his voice vibrate through the delicate metal piece as he prolonged this torture. He idly picked up one pencil after another as if it was a very important decision.  âThis one looksâŠsturdy.â
Gavinâs vitals had elevated and Nines smirked to himself when he turned ever so slightly to see Gavinâs face bright red. Â The hands holding the phone were gripping it tightly and his jaw was clenched. Â He was trying so hard to keep his eyes forward. Â Time to get his attention.
Through precalculation, Nines knew the right angle to let go of the pencil as he pulled it back so that it would land, almost perfectly, between the Detectiveâs thighs on the chair. Â As calculated, it did just that and Nines began to reach down to grab it when his hand was stopped by Gavin just as his fingertips feathered over the seam of his jeans.
âIâll fucking get it, asshole.â Gavin said, but his voice was higher than normal and that only pleased Nines more.
âAre you sure, Detective. Â I have arms after all. Â Donât I?â Nines said, mimicking Gavinâs own words. Â Gavin lifted the pencil up quickly and Nines barely hid his own amusement as he took it from him. Â âThank you, Gavin.â He whispered as he pulled back, letting the side of his cheek run along the side of Gavinâs as he did so.
When he made it back to his desk, the look on Gavinâs face gave him great pleasure. Â A beautiful shade of red, as well as his ears. Â The same shade he saw often when Gavin was overwhelmed by him physically and emotionally. Â Gavinâs eyes met his and he stood up, walking off in the direction of the bathrooms. Â
To think, it was still only early morning and he had hours of ideas planned for Gavin. Â He only hoped he wouldnât cave too quickly, as Nines shivered at the thought of prolonging this sense of control for as long as he could.
Gavin Reed was going down.
Gavin splashed cold water over his face, dipping his hand back down to the faucet and filling again to repeat the action until his face settled into its natural tone.  Phckin androidsâŠ
All this because he didnât want to hold Ninesâ hand? Â When had his partner become so damn particular about this stuff? Â It was one of the things he liked about Nines, his no nonsense, no strings attached approach to everything. Â So why now was he being so pushy about this PDA shit?
Gavin looked at himself in the mirror and his mind drifted to a few moments ago.  There was a lingering scent on him from Nines, which Gavin didnât think androids could have smells, but Nines did.  The more he thought on it, it was a mixture of elements from his apartment.  So, to Gavin, Nines smelled like home.  When he realized what his own thought just was he felt his face redden again with embarrassment.  Nines smelled like home? Get a grip Gavin, phckâŠ
He knew, of course, what Nines was doing and he decided he wasnât going to fall for it. Â If Nines could avoid and ignore him, then so too could Gavin. Â He wouldnât give him the pleasure of flustering Gavin again. Â He psyched himself up in the mirror, took a couple of deep breaths before he walked out of the bathroom.
He expected to see Nines sitting at their desks, but he was once again huddled with Connor over at his desk. Â Gavin watched them with a frown. Â Did he talk to Connor about what happened in the elevator? Â The two were close as brothers and Nines had told him plenty of times when he couldnât seem to adjust to some social interactions it was Connor he relied on.
âWhat about me? Â I can teach you lots of stuff about social interactions.â Gavin had said at the time, slightly hurt Nines wouldnât come to him. Â Nines though lifted a brow at him.
âForgive me Gavin, but the only social interactions I feel I can learn from you are the kind of things Iâll save for people I donât wish to interact with. Â If I need schooling on the proper ways to flip off people, I assure that youâll be the first one I seek out.â Nines had said in reply, but Gavin had found that funny and only laughed.
That was another thing Gavin liked about Nines. Â His blunt wit was attractive as all hell and Gavin didnât mind taking a few blows to his ego. Â He couldnât even be mad at him and usually if he was it wasnât for very long.
The one saving grace, as Gavin saw it, is that this loverâs spat would likely be forgotten by the time they went home tonight. Â Here they were partners, but at home, they were whatever the fuck they wanted to be and Gavin loved that. Â He didnât have to be mean Detective Reed and Nines could stop being so damned uptight and instead come unbound and undone.
At this thought his face reignited.  His mind was flooded with Nines face, flushed blue, mouth parted⊠Â
âPhck.â Gavin breathed as he grabbed his coffee cup and went to refill it.  If he wasnât careful he might have to make a run for the menâs room, but this time for a completely different reason.  He opted to ignore Nines unless absolutely necessary for the job.  Then, when the day was done and they headed home heâd be generous and let Nines apologize to him for being a dick.  Maybe draw it out for a little bit of extra attention in the bedroomâŠ
Ego restored, Gavin walked confidently to his desk and grudgingly started doing paperwork, making sure to keep his eyes off of Nines.
The day passed by slowly without Nines constant intervention in his work day. Â He went to lunch with Tina instead, but opted not to mention their spat. Â As much as he loved Tina, she tended to side sometimes with Nines on specific things. Â So he let her talk about the newly deviated receptionist android sheâd been going on about for a month. Â It was kinda cute to see her crushing so hard and he did his due diligence to encourage her to finally just ask her on a date. Â There was not much else he could do.
Afternoon came and went and Nines continued to remain by Connorâs side, pouring over documents and reviewing evidence down in the evidence room. Â Every time Nines walked by him he ignored him, hoping he might glance his way, but his attention was completely on Connor and Gavin felt himself sulking every time Nines refused to look at him.
Finally, Gavin had enough when his watch showed 7:47pm and Nines made no move to leave. Â So he stood and stretched, figuring heâd venture down into the evidence room himself on the pretense of a case he was working on to see what the hell they were up to. Â As he began to walk though, they emerged and Connor called out to him.
âDetective Reed. Â Itâs late, you should be heading home.â Connor said and at this Gavinâs eyes turned to look at Nines.
âWhat about you?â Gavin asked.
âConnor has asked me to remain for a time to go over additional evidence that was found for his current case. Â Theyâre bringing it down now, but itâs a ways out of Detroit, so head home without me and I will catch up with you once weâve finished here.â Nines replied coolly.
Gavin just stared at him, trying so hard not to show his disappointment. Â In a moment of weakness he heard his voice announce his obvious insecurity.
âYouâre coming home tonight, right?â
The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. Phck!
âIâm not yet sure, it all depends on the-â
âWhatever.â Gavin said quickly to mask his growing apprehension. Â He didnât wait for a reply, just walked back to his desk and collected his bag. Â He thought he heard Connor call after him, but he didnât care. Â He just wanted to get away.
He felt his eyes sting a bit, but managed to compose himself. Â Why the hell did that hurt so much? Â He realized that since he became Nines life partner that heâd never went home alone. Â Heâd not fallen asleep without Nines beside him. Â So Nines so casually denying him this comfort hurt. Â Like he had lost something in the exchange of words.
Gavinâs drive home was in silence. Â He didnât want to listen to the radio and coasted his way home in a haze. Â His mind wouldnât stop overthinking everything. Â When he arrived home he was greeted warmly by his cat, Dick, who danced around his ankles for want of attention and food. Â Gavin obliged, soaking in the affection the cat offered as a substitute in Nines absence.
A few hours into a few bad movies and TV shows Gavin checked his phone. Â 11:23pm and still no word from Nines. Â Despite everything, he was worried. Â He opened his messenger and clicked the name âRoboPrickâ.
[TrashHuman]: You coming home soon?
He smirked slightly at seeing his username permanently changed because Nines refused to tell him how to change it. To anyone else it would seem they hated each other, but in all honesty these were terms if endurement.
[RoboPrick]: Â At present we are analyzing over 230 various types of dirt to calculate which one was found on a boot at a crime scene. Â This particular sample has ground mica found in it, so weâre cross referencing drilling plants and other possible locations against this particular type.
[TrashHuman]: Is that a yes or a no ya prick?
[RoboPrick]: The task will likely take all night between the two of us, so no. Â I will meet you at the office in the morning.
[TrashHuman]: Whatever.
Gavin tossed his phone off to the side, feeling pissed but figuring there wasnât much he could do about it now.  Boy would he make Nines pay for this tomorrow.  What if he called himself in sick and refused to open the door if Nines tried to come see him?  Then he remembered the time he fought with Nines and the android had completely removed his door from the other side with a simple screwdriver, breaking his lock in the processâŠand later his bed frame.
Gavin blushed and resigned himself to going to bed and work tomorrow. Â He figured he wasnât going to hear from Nines again, but then his phone went off again.
[RoboPrick]: <3
Gavin felt his face redden even further, that small emoji meaning more to him in that moment then the sender could possibly understand. Â He stood and padded his way into his bedroom, crawling into his bed and realizing he was missing something.
âDick? Â Here kitty, kitty, kitty!â He called out in the usual way he addressed his feline friend. Â The cat was normally found following him around the apartment, but he noticed that the cat stood outside the door looking in at him. Â âGet in here asshole.â
Gavin tapped the empty side of the bed and the cat came to jump up. Â But instead it stood on its hind legs, front paws on the bed as it observed the empty side that typically held Nines. Â Dick looked at him, then meowed. Â Gavin realized that the cat often fell asleep ON Nines, or laying between them. Â The android could turn up his body temperature and the cat had fallen in love with this feature. Â Just like Gavin, who had relied on Nines being here for things to feel normal, Dick too seemed reluctant without him present.
Instead, the cat wandered the apartment yowling all night for the android that was nowhere to be found. Â Eventually, before sunrise, the cat jumped up beside Gavin and curled up in Ninesâ vacant spot. Â Gavin, who often suffered from insomnia, pulled the cat close to provide him the warmth he was obviously missing. Â The cat purred in his arms and the vibration coming from the cat seemed enough to make him feel like Nines was there. Â So he finally slept.
Gavin coasted through his morning barely feeling it. Â His morning coffee was bland without whatever the hell it was Nines did to make it taste like liquid sex, his ride in just made him irritated because without his partner there to focus on he noticed how many stupid people were driving the streets of Detroit. Â It was so rainy out he was practically soaked as he ran into the building. Then, worst of all, he had to face the elevator all on his own. Â Gavin stood and looked at it for a while and when it opened its doors to him he felt cold. Â He turned, instead, and took the stairs.
Only when he reached the doors leading into the homicide department did he feel a little life returning to him. Â He would see Nines and maybe the android had forgiven him enough to stop with the games.
But it wasnât the RK900 that greeted him as he entered, but Connor, wearing gray sweatpants and a DCPD hooded sweater.
âGood morning, Detective Reed.â Connor said jovially.
âWhatâs with the outfit?â Gavin asked, not use to seeing Connor in anything but his android issued uniform. Â
âAhh, yes. Â Well, you see. Â Nines and I got up early this morning to scout some potential sites for the ground mica we found last night when it began to downpour. Â Our clothing was completely soaked through before we realized it. Â So Iâm wearing this today.â Connor replied, a slight blush on his face.
âDonât you two even know when to come in out of the rain?â Gavin asked, rolling his eyes. Â Cyberlife couldâve at least equipped them with common sense. Â Oh well. Â âWhereâs Nines?â
âLocker room.â
Gavin left Connor behind and stood just outside the locker room doors. Â He was trying to psych himself up to talk this out rationally with Nines. Â He wouldnât give in, of course, but surely Nines felt how bad his night was without Gavin there? Â He felt his stomach sink at the thought of what if Nines felt no difference at all? Â What if he never even gave Gavin another thought after heâd left? Â This worked Gavin up alright, but it was not rational at all.
âNines! Â Where the fuck are you? Â We need to talk.â Gavin called as he slammed the door open and stepped inside the locker room. Â It was, for the most part, vacant.
âBack here, Detective. Â One moment please.â Nines called out from the back of the room.
âNo one minute please bullshit, weâre talking about this n-â Gavin began as he stomped his way back to where he knew Nines would be, only to stop dead in his tracks at the sight that awaited him.
Nines stood, tall and lean, in nothing but a towel. Â His skin was still wet, gleaming under the harsh lighting from above and as he turned to view Gavin his hair was a soft mess of curls with one fierce gray eye peeking out from beneath. Â This wasnât work Nines, but leisure Nines.
Gavin swallowed hard as his eyes went to every inch he could memorize, because Nines was fucking beautiful like this. Â His hair curled when he didnât set it back with gel and Gavinâs heart swelled to see him so off guard. Â Especially after the terrible night heâd had.
âI canât sleep.â He had told Nines when they first got together, confiding in him about his issues with insomnia. Â Nines had lain down with him and recited his favorite books from memory so Gavin could fall asleep, cheek pressed to his chest as the drone of his biocomponents and the hum of his voice emanating from there soothed him. Â Heâd not had another sleepless night, not since last night. Â
Other times heâd run his hands through Nines hair, messing it up so it could curl over his eye just as it was now. Â The way it would caress his face as Nines hovered over him and how warm it was against his lips as he gave in, gladly, to his demanding lover. Â Always a look of such tenderness behind those curls.
Gavin felt a rush of warmth, such affection that he was overwhelmed by it.
âYes, Gavin?â Nines asked as he waited for whatever it was Gavin had originally meant to say. Â But for all his bravado, he couldnât bring himself to argue with Nines about this. Â Because he fucking missed this and him, but he didnât know how to just fucking tell him. Â So he turned, without a word and walked back out into the main area of the department.
As Gavin stepped into the bullpen he heard a clattering of noise coming from the very center and noticed Fowler trying to get everyoneâs attention.
âListen up everyone. Â Lieutenant Anderson has something he wants to say. Â Pipe down Philips!â Fowler said, pointing his death glare towards an officer who was still talking. Â âThe floor is yours Hank.â
âThanks, Jeffrey.â Hank replied, then cleared his throat when he realized all eyes were on him. Â âToday marks an important milestone for the DCPD. Not only has crime decreased in the last year, but solved cases are up. Â While I stand among you good men and women who work tirelessly for the city of Detroit and its people, I think we can all agree that this is due in large part to the tireless efforts of our android counterparts who work at our side willingly.â Hank said with a pause, before continuing. âOne year ago, today, the first android prototype of his kind walked through the doors of Jimmyâs bar and found himself a royal pain in the ass.â
The room laughed and Gavin noticed that Connor, while smiling, was blushing a bit.
âI wasnât pleasant, or even baseline decent. Â But he persisted. Â Not only did he stay by my side when chaos reigned, he stayed with us once he had the choice to leave. Â He was a major figure in the history books who couldâve gone on to do great things, but instead he chose to remain my partner and all of our friends. Â So I wanted to thank him and mark his one year anniversary so he remembers just how appreciated, needed and loved he really is here.â
Hank pulled up a small bag from under his desk and set it in front of Connor.
âSome of the guys pooled in to get you this.â Hank said, fondly watching the emotional roller coaster that was Connorâs face. Â At this, Gavin noticed Nines had joined him, watching curiously.
Connor looked around, obviously not use to such attention, but he reached into the bag and pulled out a small box. Â He opened it and his face immediately lit up.
âWe got you a new coin, but this one is one of a kind. Â Just like you Con.â Hank said warmly. âLook at the inscription on the back.â
âFaithful friend. Great humanitarian. Â Lover of Dogs.â Connor read aloud and there were a few chuckles from around, but a few silent tears as well. Â Connor, among them. Â âI donât know what to say. Â Thank you. Â I will cherish this.â
Connor stood and put his hand out for Hank to shake, a sign of respect, but Hank wasnât having it. Â He took Connorâs hand and pulled him into a tight embrace. Â Connor accepted it and nearly lost his composure as his fingers grasped to the old manâs jacket.
Gavin looked around and saw his co-workers smiling, Tina Chen recording the moment on Hankâs phone and even Fowler was grinning from ear to ear. Â Gavin turned and looked at Nines, who was smiling so big it was a sight to behold. Â And Gavin understood, because as he looked down to see Ninesâ hand right next to his own all he wanted in that moment was to slip his hand into Ninesâ and show him and everyone that he loved and appreciated all the small things Nines did to make his life better than it ever was before him.
Gavin slowly moved his hand, so close to Nines he could feel the warmth it radiated. Â At the last moment though, Nines lifted his hand with the others and clapped as Connor turned from Hank to grin widely at them all. Â Moment gone, Gavin lost his composure.
He turned and grabbed Nines by the lapel of his jacket, turning him towards him and kissed him full on the lips in view for everyone to see. Â He didnât care who saw or if it was proper etiquette. Â He wasnât going to waste another moment doubting. Â Nines was startled, but eased into the kiss naturally. Â Because thatâs what this was. Â Fucking natural. Gavin pulled away from Nines, still holding his lapel as he addressed his aghast co-workers.
âYou see that fuckers? Â Nines is MINE. Â I fucking love him. Â We make out, we have sex and itâs fuckin great! Â If any of you asshats has any problems with that then I got a fist I call âno fucks givenâ to introduce your face to.â Gavin said in quick succession, daring anyone to cross him.
The room was deadly silent, awkward even as everyone just stared. Â Tina had turned Hankâs phone on them and no doubt recorded the whole damn thing. GOOD. Â Then a voice rang out over the silence.
âNo one gives a shit youâre gay for Nines Reed!â Fowler said, chuckling.
âEveryone knows about your make out sessions in the elevator, asshat!â Tina chimed in.
Gavin stood, dead still and narrowed his eyes at the room.
âAre you a moron Reed? Â This is a Government building. Â Thereâs cameraâs everywhere you dumbshit.â Hank chimed in and Gavin noticed a few nervous chuckles starting up around them, turning into an uproar.
Still clinging to Ninesâ jacket, Gavin leaned in closer to Nines as he glowered at the room.
âDid you know about this RoboPrick?â Gavin whispered to Nines.
Nines leaned in and circled Gavin protectively in his arms, pressing a smirking mouth to the side of his head.
âOf course I did, Detective.  Donât play coy, you did too⊠Itâs all part of the thrill.â Nines replied and Gavin felt his face burn, red hot.  Without a word, he pulled Nines along towards the elevator.
âReed! Â Itâs only 10:30 in the morning, where the fuck do you think youâre-â Fowler started, but bristled when Gavin only lifted up his hand and flipped him off without even turning back.
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You can visit my AO3 for anything I donât currently post to Tumblr, which is a multi-chapter Reed900 fic currently ongoing. Thanks for reading! đ
#gavin reed x rk900#reed900#gavin reed#rk900 nines#gavin x rk900#dbh rk900#gavin900#gavin army#dbh gavin#detroit being human#detroit become human#fanfic#dbh nines
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