#if i actually manage to finish What Remains i think i'll be satisfied for the rest of my life

[haedraulics]

hi HAEDRAULICS! i absolutely adore your art and regularly reread your writings on ao3. will you ever update "what remains"? its an absolutely amazing story with a beautiful view of politics and philosophy, and your characterisation of levi and erwin is one of the best ive read. ur welcome to ignore this ask if you feel uncomfortable answering. thanks!

hello anon! thank you so much for your generous compliments about my writing, it really means a lot to me 😭💕the 7th chapter of What Remains is actually at 9.7k words right now, but i'm imagining it will need at least another 10k for the chapter events to wrap up. i've been very much neglecting it since i last updated last year, but i've been super busy with various other projects and obligations gsdfjgjkgj however, i still really love the story and would desperately like to release a new chapter this year, i'm endlessly grateful that people still read my writing and look forward to new releases despite my chronically late release times! 🙈

if it's any comfort, i have basically all three arcs of What Remains plotted out- it's really a matter of turning drafts into prose! but who knows, maybe after i graduate school i'll have a wealth of time and energy to wrap up this story that i've already put so much into hhahaha

[authorhjk1]

Hi writer-nim, I'm no detective, but since checking out and enjoying your colour series I'll take a wild guess though I may be wrong lol but the one with the * has to somewhat be RV related since the first two stories about it are connected but the secret lies in the characters mentioned during the first one with Irene and since Seulgi showed up in the second one I guess the remaining members would show up then (I hope) but since Yeri was already written in black I hope you could make another one of her in this? She looked amazing here I guess this counts as purple even though she has a white dress inside lol but the outfit sure is tempting since it looks so easy to rip off everything from her, I mean who doesn't want to see maknae tiddies being cared for while bouncing up and down all over your face. But its ok if you can't make one more of her, however you can make this for a future piece if you feel like it. Have a nice day.

https://kpopping.com/documents/c9/4/1200/240405-Red-Velvet-Yeri-Coach-Pop-Up-Opening-Event-documents-4.jpeg?v=c62fd

https://kpopping.com/documents/36/1/1200/240405-Red-Velvet-Yeri-Coach-Pop-Up-Opening-Event-documents-2.jpeg?v=3cf88

Purple

(Kim Yeri X Male Reader)

You take your tie out of Yeri's hand. The bottom part is already soaked. Looking down on her, you see her phone in the other hand. A picture of you is on the screen.

"Are you going to punish me?"

Yeri's mischievous grin awakens something dark within you. Punishing her is something you've always wanted to do. To wipe that satisfied smile off her face, by totally ruining her body.

"Or are you gonna rat me out to Irene unnie?"

But then again, that's exactly what Yeri wants. And you don't want to give in so easily. Her cheeks are still showing a hint of red, after you've just caught her in the act. Of course you knew what was going on inside her room, when you saw her thong dangle on her doorknob.

"Do you think Irene would like it, if I told her you touch yourself to a picture of me?"

You hold up your tie.

"And use this as well?"

"You don't have any proof."

Her victorious, teasing smile makes a fire burn inside of you. She manages to piss you off and turn you on at the same time. After Seulgi, Joy and Wendy all slept with you, you expected Yeri to eventually follow in their footsteps. You just didn't expect she would actually touch herself, thinking about you. It turns you on more, thinking about how often she could've already done this.

"So what? You want to pretend to be a bad girl?"

Yeri stands up, the top of her head barely reaching your chin.

"I am a bad girl. And what do bad girls like I get.... daddy?"

She whispered that last word. And she watches you with amusement in her eyes as she waits for a reaction.

Just like the other three, Yeri doesn't know that Irene is allowing you to sleep with them. She really wants to be a bad girl. To seduce someone else's boyfriend. Even if it's Irene. The thrill of finally getting what she wants rushes through her veins.

"No."

Yeri's face falls, when she hears your rejection. She expected you to kiss her, or to grab her by her throat and and tell her how bad she really is, or run to Irene and tell her about this. She didn't expect a cold rejection.

"But-"

Before she can finish her complaint, you grab her shoulders and turn her around. You push her onto the bed and Yeri hits the mattress she was sitting on just now. With her face buried in her sheets, you straddle her legs and place your hands on her ass.

"You're not a bad girl, Yeri."

Using your tie, you first put both her hands on her back, before tying her wrists together.

"You're just a pathetic brat."

You hear a muffled moan at your words. Seems like you hit a nerve.

"I will punish you. And then, I'm gonna make sure you won't act up again. Understood?"

Yeri slightly lifts her head to give you a nod. When you reach for the purple fabric, you lick your lips. Time to claim the last Red Velvet member. You can't believe you're actually getting to fuck all of them. With new found strength, you rip Yeri's dress off her body. Another moan into the sheets follows a surprised gasp.

You expose her ass by tearing the purple dress open further and bunching up the white one around her waist. Her white cheeks instinctively make you deliver a hard slap. You don't even take your time to properly admire her body.

Moan after moan leaves Yeri's mouth as you strike her again and again. Within a matter of minutes both her cheeks show a fiery red. Her moans start to turn into sobs.

"Do you want me to keep punishing you?"

You slowly place a hand on her right cheek, which makes her flinch, before you slowly let it travel inside the gap between her thighs.

"Or do you want me to use you?"

You don't give her another option. Yeri's doesn't deserve just sex. The way she acts makes it clear that the only way she is useful is by being used.

"D-Daddy,"

Her voice is still shaking a little. Especially when you let your fingertips graze her wet labia. Her breath hitches.

"P-Please use me. I promise I'll be a good toy."

You squint your eyes in suspicion. It seems like you managed to turn her around faster than you expected. Or she is just putting up an act.

"Turn around, little brat."

Your mocking tone makes Yeri listen and she quickly does what you tell her. She is now lying on her back and you can see her face now. A mixture of satisfaction and anticipation. As if this is what she expected, but she didn't think you would go this far? You don't really care at this point. You only care about that cute pussy underneath her purple dress. Since it's almost completely see through, you can already see it. And because you ripped open her dress earlier, you can now just push the useless fabric to the side, revealing her pink lips.

Usually, you would've leaned down and started to eat her out. And she does look delicious, no doubt about it. But you want to make a point. That you are the one who controls her and not the other way around.

You gather some of your saliva in your mouth, before you spit onto her pussy. Yeri gasps at your lewd, almost rude, actions and you push yourself inside of her.

Soon, she is a mewling mess. Her loud cries echo through the dorm, which Irene is probably able to hear. By now, you've basically folded her in half, her ankles to her ears and your face close to hers as you drive yourself into her depths again and again.

"D-Daddy! I-I-I'm-"

Your powerful thrusts and her incoming orgasm makes her tongue and mouth useless. Her brain can't comprehend what's going for a second, before the climax rushes through her. Her body shakes underneath you, eyes rolling to the back of her head.

You grab a fistful of her hair, once she is finished. You manage to stay inside of her as you lie down on the bed yourself and make Yeri straddle you.

"Alright, little brat. Ride me and make me cum. Or I will only punish you from now on. Without the sex."

Yeri's eyes grow wide with fear and a moment later, she starts bouncing on your cock. Her hands hold onto your chest, her eyes are closed as she takes as much of you as she can. She still feels to well dressed for your taste. You reach upwards and grab the purple fabric once more. Yeri watches with big eyes as you tear her dress open again, right above her chest. You only need to pull at the white one a little bit and suddenly, Yeri's tits bounce freely to the rhythm of her riding. You use both hands to play with her soft flesh, enjoying her slick pussy around your cock and her mounds in your hands. When you start to play with her nipples a little more, Yeri throws her head back in pleasure, letting out louder moans.

"You have some nice tits, little brat."

Girls like Yeri always pretend to be bad girls, but they usually love to get praised. You feel it working when Yeri picks up the pace. Pulling her upper body a little more towards you, you capture on of her nipples with your mouth. You greedily suck on both of them individually, switching at random intervals.

Yeri is a moaning mess on top of you. Her hands, which are still tied together, are pressing onto your chest for support as she loses herself in the world of pleasure. Just like you. Your hands have travelled from her tits to her sore ass cheeks. Your mouth still licking and biting her soft skin. You start to pull her onto your cock with more force.

"Fuck, you really are a bad girl."

You say between licks as you feel her pussy squeezing and massaging your cock.

Yeri moans louder and you give her a couple of more spanks, which make her shake.

But you stop after a couple, because your own orgasm overwhelms you. You hold her in place as you thrust upwards, cuming deep inside her cunt. Yeri moans and whines, feeling your cum fill her insides.

[pagesofkenna]

pspsps tell us about your vanishing of ethan carter opinions please

so unfortunately I can't talk about how much I loved The Vanishing of Ethan Carter without also mentioning how much I didn't like What Remains of Edith Finch. I went into EC feeling constantly reminded of EF - the titles are similar, the graphics are similar, the gameplay is similar, and I was really worried the experience would be the same as well

without spoiling much about Edith Finch, my main feeling about it is that the developers thought they were making a touching and bittersweet anthology of family deaths, but what they actually made was a whimsical light-hearted horror story of a family killing each other through negligence and obsession. I think I would have loved it if it had committed to being a weird horror story, but instead it just felt disappointing and tonally confused

Ethan Carter is pretty aware from the start that it's a whimsical horror story. the second puzzle in the game is a murder you're trying to solve, and theres more murders from there; a later puzzle includes a jumpscare portion, which I skipped entirely because I was playing at night, only to learn that this was one of a number of puzzles required to finish the game, and the game even included the ability to auto jump back to that puzzle so I wouldn't have to backtrack (I don't know if I would have had to fore-track - I really didnt want to do the jumpscare puzzle, so I ended up just watching a youtube video of the ending of the game lol)

mechanically the game was fun but could have used some work. they were very intentional about the game 'not holding your hand' which just meant that some portions were confusing and tedious (there's a loooooong stretch between the Astronaut puzzle and the Puzzle House where the game lives up to the genre title Walking Sim). i used a walkthrough to make sure i wasn't getting distracted by red herrings because I am an adult with a full-time job and video games are supposed to be fun. I think without a walkthrough I might've gotten frustrated by the game and the impact of the ending might've been less satisfying - or it might have been more satisfying, the world will never know

narratively the game really delivered. i'll save spoilers for under the cut below, but basically i went in expecting one kind of story, then the game slowly shifted my expectations and delivered a really satisfying gutpunch of a conclusion. by the time I entered the mines I had figured out that something wasn't quite what it seemed, and the payoff of that was the actual heartbreaking, bittersweet finale Edith Finch hadn't managed to capture.

you don't play as Ethan the way you play as Edith, you play as a paranormal investigator coming into town to discover what happened to Ethan, and learning about Ethan from this outside perspective made me really invested. he likes writing! his family is pretty awful! he had written to this paranormal investigator guy, not even directly asking for help, but the guy had come to help him anyways and I desperately wanted to find out what had happened to Ethan! and the ending made me tear up, which is the hallmark of a good game for me

spoiler additions:

what really made me tear up the most was the shots of the family (mostly just the parents though) trying to save Ethan from the fire. I think I figured out around the Church scene or the Mine scene that the 'Sleeper' wasn't literal; there were some narrative inconsistencies (the brother got killed up by the bridge, and yet was with his parents in the mines, which meant the bridge scene happened later but that wasn't making sense to me) and at some point the VO said something that made me think 'oh, he's not a paranormal investigator; he's Death'

that wasn't exactly right, but that means I went into the final scene expecting to be leading Ethan into death somehow, so the reveal that everything had been a story invented in the mind of a dying child didn't come as a shock to me. (I've seen some comments from people feeling like the 'its all a dream' reveal was a cop-out, but the eerie tone of the game never gave me the sense that this was a fantasy, just a fantastic interpretation of events, so yeah of course it wasn't real.)

like, in his dying moments this small child imagines the abuse of his family to be tenfold and the hero of his own invention to come and save him. like, damn, i can relate to that?? who can't relate to that?? maybe what hits so hard for me about this game is that i'm also a would-be storyteller. his family never actually tried to kill him anymore than there was actually an astronaut running around the woods; his brain had four minutes to reinterpret events in a way that made cohesive, narrative sense, which is definitely what all of us try to do to understand our own lives but it's really highlighted in the mind of a young, imaginative child

so anyway yeah, i teared up a bit, and i thought about ghosts and souls and how stories are true even when they're not factual, and thats kind of all i ever want from a horror story, and it was good

[catofadifferentcolor]

Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood

"All we need is a cause to fight for. And for me, that cause is you."

As I’ve been reading a lot about the Crusades recently, it seemed a natural progression to try playing Assassin’s Creed for the first time since the franchise began a decade and a half ago.

It was quite the effort for me to force myself to take a break before starting Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood after finishing AC2. I wanted to know what happens next so very badly - and my first thought on starting ACB was: this doesn't disappoint.

While the mechanics remain largely the same, the graphics have once again gotten an upgrade - all of sequence 1 had me going holy shit, this is cinematic as well as wow, they're really pulling out all the hero stops. And if that somehow fails to impress, the first present day sequence had me thinking these characters have personalities for the first time since the series began. Desmond was a blank, passive slate in AC1 and only just starting to show signs of being otherwise in AC2, but here Desmond is - finally - an independent actor with just the right level of snark to make me go yeah, I actually like this guy. Lucy too seems something like other than an obvious Templar plant - a like she's actually struggling with her inevitable betrayal - and Rebecca and Shawn are more than just snark.

There's much I love about ACB: the main plot is interesting but oddly short. There are about a thousand side quests, so it's not exactly a short game, but I can't help but think incorporating at least some of them into the main storyline would have made a bit more sense. The Borgia Towers offer an interesting set of challenges, and recruiting the brotherhood is a concept I'd like to have seen more of in more detail (training missions with the Mentor? Ezio spreading his influence more slowly across Europe instead of suddenly being able to send his trainees across the world? the recruits themselves having personalities and backgrounds and motivations?) Even renovating Rome doesn't start to feel gimmicky until you're buying the Coliseum.

And yet I don't love it quite as much as AC2 - and I think it largely comes down to the fact that all of Ezio's personal grown happened in the former, with little room left in ACB for any positive, meaningful growth. We don't see Ezio struggle with the fact that his choice to leave Rodrigo alive in the Vatican lead to the destruction of his home for a second time. We don't see him struggle to be a leader to his burgeoning brotherhood, he already is one. We have peak narrative symmetry starting with a siege and ending with a siege, and yet only the first stirs the emotions - Cesare has lasted this long because he's always conveniently in the wrong place, not because he's a satisfying or interesting boss.

In short, I love older Ezio (who somehow manages to be at peak attractiveness throughout the game, going so far as to complain when someone says he should slow down because he's older; that will never not be hilarious). I just wish he had a bit more meat to work with in ACB.

It's not all unicorns and rainbows though. The number of times I accidentally called a horse instead of flicking on eagle vision or speaking to a merchant is in the thousands. The number of debilitating gut wounds Ezio has recovered from is starting to verge on comically unrealistic. The number of plot points that are touched on - why was La Volpe so willing to assume Machiavelli was the traitor with comparatively scant evidence? How does one build a brotherhood of assassins? How did Claudia learn to wield a knife in the first place? - but quickly glossed over is frustrating. I could have done with a smaller Rome and more fleshed out plot. And the bits where you have to use the apple at the end simply failed to satisfy.

Yet I love it. Not in the way I think I'll always love AC2, but it's a solid game. Short, but solid. I enjoyed playing it and would loved to have seen more, but I'm not disappointed with what we got.

(Though I was shocked by Lucy's death. Yes, she was an obvious Templar plant, but I'd like to have seen her explain herself before we reached Redemption Equals Death. I'm eager to see the fallout in ACR... but not eager enough to continue forgoing errands and chores that I've been putting off for AC2 and ACB before beginning.)

4.5 of 5 stars - definite replay value, but not the head-exploding awesome of AC2.

[xxcatzladyxx]

Demon Slayer Advent Calendar | Day Two | Inosuke x Reader | A advent calendar

written by me

~~~

"Silent night, holy night...!"

"Fight me and stop singing!" Inosuke yells at you. You drop something from your hands in shock. You close your eyes and take a deep breath in and out, trying not to bring the boy with the pretty face to your neck. You adopt the facial expression of Giyu, the water pillar, and give him the same look he got from Giyu back on Natagumo Mountain.

You pick up what you have dropped and continue on your way. Inosuke doesn't seem to like the fact that you just leave him standing there and ignore his challenge to fight. He runs after you and keeps shouting that you should fight him.

After a while, the shouting behind you becomes too annoying. You stop abruptly. The black-haired man then runs into you. You turn to him with a devilish smile on your lips.

"Dear Inosuke, unfortunately I don't have time for you today. I have to prepare something. So, if you'll excuse me, I'd like to be left in peace now. Thank you for your understanding, my dear, I'll see you tomorrow!" His face turns slightly pink at the words 'my dear'. He lets you go and remains standing on the spot as if ordered but not collected. Later, Tanjiro and Zenitsu pick him up and ask him, puzzled, why he is standing around like this.

Meanwhile, you are standing in your kitchen. A silver pot is on the stove with water boiling away. You place a bowl of finely chopped chocolate chips in the pot. While the chocolate melts, you place what you've been carrying around with you on the kitchen counter. It was an advent calendar to fill by yourself. This year, you have vowed to bring Inosuke closer to Christmas. And the best idea you can come up with is a classic Advent calendar filled with chocolate.

The chocolate is now completely melted and ready for further processing. You search through your many drawers for molds. You want to shape the chocolate for Christmas. Like a star or a bell. But to your displeasure, you only find heart shapes. Heart shapes of all things.

'Although that's enough for Inosuke. He doesn't know the word or the meaning of love,' you think to yourself, shrugging your shoulders, and get to work.

After a few hours, you are finally finished with the sweaty work. The calendar is neatly filled door by door with chocolate, the pot and bowl are spick and span and back in their original place and the kitchen has been spruced up. Only you are drenched in sweat and completely exhausted and decide to take a relaxing bath and then hit the sheets.

~*~

You wake up early the next morning. You take another close look at the Advent calendar. When you are satisfied with it, you leave your property and set off in search of the boy with the boar mask.

The search doesn't take long. You spot the trio of boys in a snowy forest clearing. You stop. Even in the coldest winter, Inosuke is standing outside, shirtless, training with his comrades. You correct your thoughts from yesterday.

'Not only does he not know the word love, he also doesn't know the word cold. He must be freezing like hell, that idiot!

You shake your head. It's his own fault for walking around like that. You step closer to the trio. Zenitsu notices you first. He sprints to you and falls to his knees in front of you. He tearfully asks you if you don't want to marry him after all. You roll your eyes and gently push him aside. Tanjiro greets you kindly. You greet him kindly in return. Then you go to your main destination. Inosuke Hashibira.

"Ah, you're finally here to fight me!" he yells at you again. You would love to bang the calendar in your hand against his head, but then all your work from yesterday would have been for nothing. You manage to restrain yourself and do your breathing exercise again with your eyes closed to avoid blowing up.

"No, Inosuke, I'm not here to fight you. I have to disappoint you again. I have something for you here. It's a calendar. Actually, it's an advent calendar to tide you over until Christmas," you wave the calendar back and forth in front of Inosuke's green eyes.

The confusion is clearly written on his face. On his handsome face. He's so confused by your talk that he's lost his speech.

"That's very sweet of you, (y/n)-chan!" Tanjiro praises you.

"Monjiro, hands off, that's mine!" he yells at Tanjiro and practically rips the calendar out of your hands.

"My name is Tanjiro Kamado! How many times?" Tanjiro grumbles back.

The event goes on for a while until Tanjiro gets tired of it. Finally you can explain to Inosuke how to use the Advent calendar properly. After he has calmed down again and you have been able to start it.

"So, Inosuke, as you can see, the doors are in different orders on the calendar. You can only open one door per day. Got that?" you ask again, just to be on the safe side.

"Sure, I got that! How stupid do you think I am?" Inosuke yells. Your facial expression becomes Giyu's again. Your nerves are on edge again. For good reason, you don't answer your opponent's stupid question and just let it go.

~*~

To be on the safe side, you check with Inosuke to make sure he has understood your instructions one hundred percent. You knock on his door and not a second later it is torn open and almost flies off its hinges.

"Good morning, dear Inosuke! I just wanted to check on you and ask how the Advent calendar is doing."

"I've completely emptied the calendar," he says calmly.

You're blowing a fuse. He can't be fucking serious. You slap your forehead with your bare hand. Your breathing exercise is forgotten.

"I can tell you really come from the mountains," you say in a calm voice, on the verge of bursting.

"What does that mean again?"

"You should open one door a day and not devour the whole calendar in one day. I didn't spend hours in the kitchen just for this!" you say to him.

"You made it by yourself?" he asks you, puzzled.

"Yeah, you fucking idiot."

"Will I get a new one?"

"Yes...", you admit defeat, not knowing what to expect. You get to make him a new calendar every day because the idiot just doesn't understand the principle of an advent calendar.

[corrodedseraphine]

dreamland | eddie munson x harrington!reader #12

pairing: eddie munson x harrington!reader

summary: After breaking up with Jason, you end up in a pretend relationship with Eddie to piss your ex off. The more you know each other the more the pretending dissappears.

the story is also avaliable on ao3

masterlist | eddie munson masterlist | general masterlist

I don't know much about D&D so if I wrote something wrong, please forgive me! 

Waking up, you noticed that you were alone in bed. You looked around the room, you were totally alone. You decided to check it out, so you got out of bed and, listening, started looking around the house. There was no one upstairs but you, but as you went downstairs you saw Eddie bravely struggling with the translations you gave him yesterday. He was sitting low bent over biting the end of the pink pencil you had recently lent him, every now and then pushing back the hair falling from his face.

"They can be annoying, huh?" you chattered as you entered the living room.

"You don't even know how much. As much as I love them, I hate them too." He rolled his eyes.

"I have an idea." You said and ran to the bathroom to get a hairbrush and a hairband. You didn't know if he would agree, but you thought it was always worth to try. By the way, you quickly brushed your teeth. Returning to your guest you placed the items on the table looking at him with a questioning expression on your face.

"You're joking right?" he asked.

"I'm as serious as possible!"

"I don't think I even know how to handle it," he added tossing the hairband.

"May I?" you asked.

"Why not" he laughed

His hair was a veritable chaos. It's been a long time since you've seen such a tangle.

"Damn it, Munson. Do you ever use a hairbrush?"

"From time to time," he shrugged his shoulders.

Once you had dealt with brushing them out you wanted to do them into a loose ponytail, but after a while another idea popped into your head. You started to divide his hair into three parts and after a while you managed to make a braid. Satisfied with yours, you went quickly to get the small mirror your mother always used and returned with it to Eddie showing him. The sight of Eddie Munson wearing a braid is an unusual sight, unusual but also very adorable. You were glad that you were the only person who had the opportunity to admire it.

"What are you laughing at?" He asked.

"You look super-sweet Mr. Munson, and now I invite you to my next Spanish class," you said trying to remain serious.

"For my sweet appearance, will today's class be a little easier, Ms. Harrington?" He smiled broadly.

"Not an option!" you said. "Please finish the translations, and I'll make breakfast."

You prepared scrambled eggs and toasts. It was the best you could come up with for the moment. When Eddie finished his task he joined you in the kitchen and then you ate together while watching morning cartoons on TV. Later you cleaned up together then both of you went to change and freshen up, and when you were done you sat down to study. The translations once again proved to be almost flawless. Hearing this, he felt incredibly motivated to learn. Learning with you made him happy. If anyone had ever told him that he would feel good while learning Spanish he would have laughed at him. This time, with you by his side, he felt like he could do it forever. With each successive praise from your lips he felt more and more confident, so much so that for the first time he felt hopeful that he would actually pass the test. Not just pass it, pass it very well. He imagined the surprised look on the teacher's face and your wide smile as soon as you heard how well he did. Over the next few hours, with quick breaks, you made your way through a really considerable amount of material. You were just about to offer lunch when you heard a quick and hard knock on the door. You weren't expecting anyone. As soon as you opened the door Dustin rushed inside like a torpedo, followed immediately by Lucas and Mike.

"Do... do you have a braid on your head?" he asked looking at Eddie. The man quickly pulled the hairband from his hair, loosening it back.

"What are you doing here Dustin?" you asked. "Steve sent you?" you crossed your arms and looked at all three of them. They looked embarrassed.

"No. Yes. Halfway." He began to stammer. "We need your help y/n."

"My help?"

"Yes. Lucas wants to invite Max to the ball and wants to pick out a gift for her, so I thought we could use some female advice or something. After all, you're buddies with Max!"

"Yes, we are buddies, so I can assure you that you don't need a gift to get her to agree."

"I beg y/n!!!" exclaimed Lucas.

You sighed. You didn't want to go out with them, preferring to be alone with Eddie. But these punks knew perfectly well that you would agree out of pity. Seeing their pleading expressions on their faces, you couldn't say no. "What do you say, Munson?" you asked looking at him. "Would you like to do a little shopping?"

"Whatever you wish, dear."

The boys left their bikes in front of your house and you all set off together to go shopping in Eddie's car. In the process they started discussing ideas for a new campaign. You tried to keep up with them, but at some point you gave up. You left all four of them in their magical fantasy world. They were so involved that they probably forgot you existed. That didn't bother you. You turned up the radio a bit and just decided to focus on the road. You hadn't been to the mall since it was rebuilt. Now everything looked completely different.

"They reconstructed it pretty good. " said Eddie coming out of the car. "People said you could see fireworks over the whole mall during the fire."

"They were probably wrong." You said looking at the others. Flashes of that night began to appear before your eyes. They were right, who would have thought that such beautiful scenery and fireworks would be the background for a battle with a huge monster from another dimension? It will also be the place where Billy, who sacrificed himself for Eleven, died. You never liked him, but I think everyone appreciated him for saving her then. Every hero had his dark side, just as every villain has the light one.

"Let's hope there will never be a fire again." Said Mike walking towards the entrance. Without a word you followed him.

As you went inside you looked around recalling all the terrible things that happened that day. Everything was terribly vivid, to the point of being too.

"You okay?" Eddie asked grabbing your hand. "The show must go on" He added nodding in the other direction. Several people from the basketball team were there. Seeing Lucas with you, they didn't fail to make some jokes.

"Look! The freaks have adopted Lucas into their messed-up cult!" shouted one of them.

Sinclair ignored this by lowering his head down.

"What's the matter with you, man? Why didn't you defend yourself?" asked Dustin.

"I don't want any trouble in the team. They don't let me live anyway for the mere fact that I belong to Hellfire."

"Screw them," said Eddie suddenly. "We didn't come here to bother with a bunch of fools."

The search for the perfect gift for Max turned out to be harder than you thought. What appealed to you didn't appeal to them, and what appealed to them didn't appeal to you. In the end, Dustin, Mike and Eddie gave up by ambling into a board game store.

"Thank you, y/n," said Lucas breaking the silence. "Lately I've had the feeling that Max doesn't want to talk to me at all."

"Have you tried to talk to her about this feeling?"

"A million times, but she kept floating me off! I'm already running out of ideas. I thought maybe she would be happy when I invite her to the ball. Maybe then it will be like before." He sighed.

"Nothing will ever be like before again. You know very well how the loss of Billy affected her."

"Everything is so messed up." He sighed resignedly.

"Would you like some advice?"

"Sure."

"Talk to her and maybe stop showing off like your teammates do. Just be yourself, the Lucas she liked in the beginning. No silly shows with your teammates. You don't have to pretend anything in front of her." You patted him on the shoulder.

He didn't answer anything. You moved on in search of the perfect gift. Eventually you came upon a small jewelry stand. Both of you decided that a bracelet with a small silver skateboard on a red string would be the best choice. When you returned to the rest of them they were already completely absorbed in the fantasy world delighting in new games and books. They didn't even notice when you returned.

"So what kids, time for ice cream?" you asked seeing the cute view. They really looked like kids. Happy and fascinated in the world of magic.

"Hell yeah!" exclaimed Dustin.

You all moved towards the ice cream stand. It was set up almost in the middle of the hallway. There were tables with plastic chairs all around. You left the guys alone and went to the bathroom, which was located nearby. When you returned everyone was already eating their desserts. There was also one waiting for you. The boys took the table standing next to the one where the cheerleaders were sitting. Seeing them looking in their direction all the time and whispering something made you roll your eyes. All in all, this was the first time outside of school that someone saw you together with Eddie. You must have played it right. Munson, seeing you coming back, jumped down from his seat and pushed back the chair next to you. Out of the corner of your eye you made sure your neighbors were watching.

"Thank you!" you said and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"I took you a chocolate one, as sweet as you are, my darling." he replied, smiling as charmingly as he could. It's a good thing you were already sitting up, because you felt your knees buckling under you.

"Ew! You guys are disgusting!" shouted Dustin.

"Shut up, Henderson." said Eddie throwing him a menacing look.

"Hey, Dusty-Bun, I wonder what Suzie would say, hearing what you say." You laughed. "You should take a cue from your Dungeon Master, besides the gameplay, he'll show you how to win her heart for forever."

"I don't know if Henderson is worthy of knowing all my magic tricks." Eddie added. "Besides, some I prefer to leave exclusively for you." 

"If you don't stop right away, I swear I'm going to call Steve right now and tell him that you are doing all the things he would REALLY not want to hear about, Jesus Christ! you make me want to puke."

"If you try to do that, I will personally throw you to the Demogorgon!" you shouted, pointing your finger at the boy.

"How do you know such a thing exists?" interjected Eddie curiously. Damn.

Seeing your confusion, Mike and Lucas sprang into action. They made up that you used to watch them while playing D&D. They made up an entire campaign in which Demogorgons swarmed, claiming that's probably why you remembered it. The more they talked, the more you started to nod at them. He believed without any problem, he had no reason not to. When it began to getting dark you returned home. On the way you stopped by the store for snacks and food for dinner. When you said goodbye to the rest of them you fell tiredly on the couch.

"I didn't think that walking around the store with this bunch would finish me off so much," you laughed.

"Didn't you? They are terrible energy suckers! Like vampires." he said sitting down next to you and making a silly face.

"But yet we still can't say no to them, knowing what we're signing up for." you smiled. You liked these kids. After all, you all had more in common than just living in the same city. "It's a shame Will moved away," you continued. "You would have loved him. Not as much as Henderson, of course, but young Byers would be your right-hand man when it comes to D&D. He's got an incredible buzz about the game!"

"Yes, I've heard of him. He's often mentioned, it's a shame I didn't have the opportunity to recruit him into my little cult." he laughed. "At first I always wondered why y/n and Steve Harrington were going out with these kids, but now I understand. That bunch of punks has someting special."

A silence fell between the two of you. But it was no longer the familiar, awkward silence you know. This one was different. Comfortable.

"So... yesterday we went a little crazy, how about chilling today?" he asked after a while.

"What do you mean?"

"I'll be right back." he said. "I know I'm absolutely forbidden to smoke in front of you, but I'm not talking about cigarettes this time." Entering the house, he raised his hand showing a joint. "What do you say?"

You raised a surprised eyebrow. "I don't know, Eddie. I've never even smoked a cigarette, not to mention weed."

"I'd be honored to witness your first time with this little wonder." he smiled broadly. Could you have said no? You could. Did you do so upon seeing that smile? Of course not.

"We can't do it at home. Follow me." You returned the smile.

Not far from your house was a small pond, you spent a lot of time sitting and writing there. You always came there when you felt bad. You could always hide there from everything. Only Steve knew how important this place was to you, which is why he never followed you there. He knew that your presence there was a sign that you needed solitude. This time you weren't there to be alone with yourself. You were there to secretly smoke pot with Eddie Munson. Another thing you would never have thought of in your life, but with Eddie it became real. At parties you were offered many times to smoke, but never felt the urge to do so. The company that was there did not seem trustworthy. Even Jason didn't make you feel as safe as you did around Eddie. The world may have been collapsing, but you felt like he was always ready to take care of you. You sat on a spread blanket near the water exchanging a joint. The first drag was terrible. You felt like you were about to suffocate from coughing. Fortunately, later it got better and better.

"I like this place."

"Me too." you replied. "This is where the further lives of Natalie and Mr. Harvy were created." you laughed. "One of my friends at the time found herself a boyfriend, and, terribly envious of her, I decided not to bother. Without saying anything to anyone I came here and sat all evening thinking up what could happen. What I would like to have happen to me, imagining that in the place of the main character was actually me." You sighed.

"Everyone is the main character of their own story," said Eddie.

"For a long time now I really feel like I'm in a book of some sort, there are things happening around me that are out of this world!"

"What kind of things, for example?"

"You wouldn't believe me." You laughed looking up at the stars. "Wow. They are so beautiful and... shiny." you laughed. "And you Munson? Do you ever feel like you're a character in a book?"

"For the past few weeks for sure. I'm just curious about its ending." He added while looking into your eyes. Beautiful, big brown eyes that were now incredibly mesmerizing.

"It's too early to finish the whole book." you said in a firm voice. "At most, you can wonder about the end of a chapter."

"In that case, I hope the current chapter will never end."

This chapter in his life was definitely called y/n Harrington. He thought that even if everything between the two of you was a pretense, he could pretend for the rest of his life. With each subsequent encounter, he found it harder and harder to resist his own feelings.

"Hey, Eddie..." interrupted his train of thought.

"Yes, princess?"

"I'm awfully hungry." you said laughing. "I think I'm hungrier than Demogorgon."

"Then we must return quickly before you decide to eat me alive. Demogorgons are not friendly when they are hungry. They are terrible," he continued joking.

"You don't even know how much." You replied, this time seriously.

When you got home you sat at the kitchen table watching Eddie make you sandwiches. You didn't mind. You felt awfully amused and literally everything was making you laugh. Eddie, for his part, was amused by you, in a positive sense. Hearing you laugh made his heart speed up, your silly jokes made your happiness infect him.

After eating the sandwiches, you sat in front of the TV with a large packet of chips. You were still hungry. You started watching some horror movie, but in it you were also entertained by everything. You never laughed so much when the demon caught its first victim. By the end, you had already started yawning. Seeing your open mouth Eddie put a chips in there. You, reacting quickly, moved your head forward and bit his finger. At that moment you thought it was incredibly funny and burst out laughing, fortunately Eddie joined you instead of getting angry.

"I think I want to sleep." You said. "And you?"

"Maybe a little," he replied with a yawn.

You parted for the bathrooms and later met at your room.

"Can I stay tonight too?" he asked when he saw you lie down under the covers. "You have an awfully comfortable bed." Of course, the bed was not the reason why he wanted to stay.

"You have no other option, well, unless you want to sleep at Steve's," you snickered.

"I'd rather on a doormat." He replied laying down next to you.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

"If I were a D&D character, what would I be?"

"Give me a moment to think." He didn't expect that. Surprised, he tried to gather his thoughts, recall everything he knows about the game and create the most ideal character his imagination allowed. "So..." he began, turning toward you. "I see you as an elf princess. You would be a master when it comes to magic, especially casting charms on others. Additionally, you would be a healer. Goodness from your heart would be able to cure anything, so you would spend most of your life wandering between villages helping others. However, when it came to fighting, you would be second to none. You would cunningly charm the enemy by luring them into traps, and of course, they wouldn't be able to resist you. No one would be able to do that..." he continued his story, inventing various situations and fight scenes. As time passed, you began to feel your eyelids getting heavier and heavier. With your eyes closed, you continued to listen, imagining everything he said. Only, in your imaginings there was someone else at your side. A powerful Master, with whom together you formed an indestructible link. Coincidentally, this Master looked just like Eddie.

When he finished telling the story and saw that you were lying with your eyes closed he turned off the night light.

"y/n?" he asked after a moment of silence.

"Hm?" you muttered.

"Can I hug you?"

Smiling to yourself, you moved closer to him cuddling your cheek into his chest. Hearing the rapid beating of his heart you began to beat out its rhythm with your finger. Eddie put one arm around you and with the other started playing with your hair. You didn't know if it was because of his presence or because of the weed, but you felt as relaxed as ever, after a very short time you fell asleep without any problem. At the same time, Eddie was fighting a battle with his thoughts. Visions of the moment when you will have to stop pretending began to haunt him. Various scenarios appeared before his eyes, the worst of which were those in which, after the pretend breakup, you went back to being strangers. However, a light appeared among the cloud of black thoughts. A scenario in which you stop pretending and everything between you becomes real. He began to think about a plan. A plan that would help him win your heart for real. What he didn't know, however, was that he had it for a long time.

[stevenbasic]

“Hi Dr J, I’m glad we finally get to chat…”

Holy shit.

——

Earlier that day, I’d been told at the front desk that there was a lady from Evolution Pharmaceuticals on the line, and that she’d like to speak with me. Aubrey had always been good about screening out the sales pitches, the irate patients, the people with whom I really never needed to actually talk. So that she was pulling me aside for this call told me that this one might be something I should probably take...

But - ugh. No. I didn’t want to. This had been a long day, a long week so far - and it was only Tuesday! God, the past few months had been more and more exhausting, humiliating and emasculating with each passing hour. And the more I learned, the more it seemed that this company was at the heart of my troubles. Yes, it offered the opportunities of great financial rewards for the practice with this clinical study trial in which we were going to be participating. Since Jeanette, my previous Office Manager, had left, the mismanagement of the business had us in dire straits. Without the money from Evolution’s study and the “Lean In” grant from the women’s advancement group, I’m not sure we’d still be afloat. So, yeah, maybe I should have taken the call.

“I’ll call them later,” I told Aubrey, and grabbed the films I needed for my next patient.

That had been three hours ago, before my little hallway meeting with Melissa. Since then Gianna - some woman who’d wanted to speak to me about the trial - had called two more times. Left messages. Really wanted just fifteen minutes of my afternoon. Needed to speak with me. I refused each call.

Finally done with patients, sitting in my office at the end of the day as darkness crept in from outside, I sighed as Brittni from the desk buzzed me. She said that Gianna was on the line again. “Can I transfer her?”

“No,” I replied on the intercom, noticing that a little green light had blinked to life on the camera I had clipped to my monitor. I hadn’t seen it before, this light. In fact...when did I get a camera on this computer?

“Tell her I'll call tomorrow...” I finished.

I had set back to finishing some patient notes on my desktop when, suddenly, my screen flashed to black. For a quick moment I thought - oh no, a crash - but then a new, unfamiliar window appeared, and my mouse pointer began moving on its own accord. What the…? The window went full screen and next thing I knew I was in a video chat with-

“If I didn’t know any better I’d think you were avoiding my calls…” the woman onscreen spoke, laughing casually as she tossed her hair...

“oh, uh…” I was immediately agape. This was who’d been trying to call me all day??

“Anyway...Hi Dr J, I’m glad we finally get to chat…”

Holy shit. This girl was gorgeous. Look at those tits.

As I stared, still shell-shocked and speechless from having my computer hijacked out from under me by a bosomy corporate careerist, she went on to introduce herself as Gianna Albertini, from the clinical trials department at Evolution Pharmaceuticals. She explained how excited she and her team was to get the study off the ground at the practice. Things had been fast tracked at the FDA, they were just waiting for some rubber stamps, and everything looked very promising for their product. She apologized for not being able to meet in person, at least for a while. “I’m on some new retroviral treatment, and they have me quarantined at home,” she explained with surprising nonchalance, “yadda yadda yadda…”

Finally, after a good several minutes of watching her talk - and she held my attention easily, her rack possibly rivaling Melissa’s - she let me get a word in edgewise. I was still confused by how in one moment I was working on my patient charts, and then in the next I was in a video chat. “H-how did you…?”

“Sorry,” Gianna laughed, casually waving away any privacy concerns I was currently about to voice, “I had to remote in, take over your desktop. I really needed to speak with you.” Beyond the blatant intrusions tactics she was obviously willing to employ, there was something in this woman’s eyes, her demeanor, that was making me more and more concerned as the conversation - such as it was - continued. She may have been acting relaxed and friendly, decidedly informal, but there was a seriousness just below the surface that even I could see, even through the screen, and even in the face of those enormous tits. “Plus, maybe it’s actually better we do it this way, rather than on the phone,” she said, as she sat up nice and straight, “So we can see one another’s...smiling faces.”

Gahh...

As she got down to brass tacks, this young woman went on to describe to me some of the details of the new wings in our building into which the office would be expanding, how much more space we and Evolution be acquiring to fulfill the needs of the trial, and when it would all be ready. “Construction is ultra-fast tracked,” she said, “should be done within a few weeks.”

Weeks?? I marveled, silently incredulous. I’d seen the plans; it was a huge project. I’d figured months, if it ever really got done at all. But, the teams did seem motivated, and there were a lot of them, working day-in and day-out, all through the night. Maybe, perhaps? Could they pull it off in weeks?

We also talked about the structure of the trial, what it would involve day-to-day, and the long-term forecast. Evolution seemed ready to set up permanent shop with a clinic in the building, by taking over much of the lease of the new space, with the study just the first step in the door.

“You’ll be listed as the lead investigator,” Gianna explained, continuing on to detail the ins-and-outs of the trial, “but don’t worry. We’ll have plenty of people in place. You really won’t have to do too much, or deal with anyone at the main office. You’ll be reporting just to me...”

“r-reporting to you?” I asked, trying to ignore the impressive bosom which filled the screen, cowed me. That had taken me back a bit...'reporting to her'? I had noticed something in this young woman’s tone, through our chat, that led me to believe that she and I possibly had different views as to the, uh, hierarchy of this whole thing. I was the doctor around this place, and had gotten used to expecting a little respect, being top of the food chain. She, on the other hand, maybe had other ideas.

“That's right,” she said, “we’ll do these chats once a week, more if I feel like we need it. I’ll expect a report from you every day, but again don’t worry. It’s basically something you just have to sign, the girls will do it all. Our other providers will be handling most of the work with the patients in the study, entering data, keeping the FDA happy, blah blah blah. Maybe we’ll ask you to go in and talk to, examine a few of the subjects, just to keep things interesting for you.”

If I hadn’t felt totally emasculated and marginalized, my authority crippled by the horde of women who’d apparently taken over my practice recently, this was the clincher. It would appear that for this study I was going to be not much more than a coddled figurehead, a token man of straw, expected to satisfy the whims of some half-rate pharm company and this woman, at her beck and call. No way!

“I’m going to have to insist on directing care for, uh, the trial subjects,” I asserted, finally getting a moment to exert my will, “they will, technically, be my patients.”

“Oh, of course!” Gianna replied, smiling and throwing her hair over her shoulder, “Allowing for some oversight from the other providers we’ll have in place, you’ll have lots of medical-decision-making to keep yourself busy!”

What did she mean, ‘oversight’?

“They’ll be different than your usual patients, the subjects that we’ll be bringing in for the study, but I think you’ll like them,” she continued, trying to reassure me, “maybe a younger crowd, and of course all female. But in general all you’ll have to do is sit back and watch the money coming in.” She sat, looked into the screen for a moment, in thought. “Though I guess we have some people there handling that for you, too, hm?”

That gave me pause, made me rethink the litany of arguments that were beginning to boil up in my throat. I’d seen some of the paperwork, quickly, as it had moved past my desk for my signatures. It involved a lot of money for the practice. Like, a lot of money. I thought of my bills, my expenses, what I still somehow owed on my student loans. If Sheryl wasn’t going to be there to provide for me, help me pay these things…

If any of it remained, there was obviously some pride I was going to need to swallow.

“S-speaking of money,” I began, “what's my compensation going to look like?“

Something about my question, something about how I was holding myself, made Gianna smile again and then sigh, a sigh that told me she knew something I didn’t, I couldn’t help but think. With that she leaned in, her eyes locked on mine through the camera, and a shiver went up my spine. “Oh don’t worry, Dr. J,” she spoke, “you’ll be well taken care of...“

===================================

Muchos Gracias to long-time friend, supporter of the story and behind-the-scenes ninja Antares for helping me assemble these clips.

Newer posts and other goodies at my Patreon

[mikkomacko]

Toothpaste smears at the corners of his mouth as he scrubs the brush over his teeth, the white foam getting dangerously close to dripping down his chin. Y/n eyes his reflection in her bathroom mirror, swiping a cotton ball of toner over the bridge of her nose. Last minute, Harry leans over the sink and spits, turning the faucet on to rinse his mouth and messy chin.

"One of these days you're going to drip toothpaste on your toes and I'm not going to help you clean it." She says, now reaching for her night serum. Harry scoffs, towel pressed to his face as he turns to face her. He drops the cloth on the counter, wiggling his butt onto the countertop.

"I've been brushing my teeth for over 20 years. Know what m'doing." He argues, eyebrows furrowing as he watches her rub the moisturizer into her skin. He does that often when they get ready for bed together, watching her skincare routine as if he were going to be rigorously tested on it later. But he never comments on it other than the occasional "that smells good" or "made ya all soft" when he presses a kiss to her cheek.

She's always wondered why he's so interested in it and apparently tonight is the night she gets some answers.

"Have ya always used all that stuff darling?"

Surprised, her eyebrows raise just the slightest bit, but she does her best to remain casual when she speaks. "Started having like a real routine a few years ago."

Harry hums, reaching for the dropper she'd previously held in her hand. He squints, reading over the label as she takes a chance to prod more. "Why bub?"

Innocently, he peers up at her through his eyelashes. "Don't know," he shrugs, "just never knew so much went into cleaning ya face. Thought some people just have good skin and others have bad."

He then reaches for her moisturizer, reading that bottle too. "There's no good or bad skin" she responds, "for some people acne is more manageable. For others it requires more time and probably money too. And some people just don't want to mess with their spots or marks. It's all normal."

Placing the products back on the counter, he gently reaches up to run his thumb over the pink bow on her headband. "So ya don't think I have bad skin?"

His tone is neutral, but a little too forced for him and she realizes why he examines her so closely when she takes care of her skin.

She lets her gaze meet his. "No Harry you don't have bad skin." She says earnestly. "You have very pretty skin. Look at how shiny your cheekbones always are." Harry smiles softly when she cups his face, running the pad of her thumb over his natural highlight.

"I've got a lot of spots though." He argues, reaching up to take her hand in his. Y/n shrugs, resting her hip against the counter. She can finish in a sec, right now she needs to talk to her extremely adorable boyfriend.

"You breakout because you workout everyday and you don't really have a routine Harry. But that doesn't make you gross or bad or anything. It's just normal."

He hums again, chewing on his bottom lip and dropping his gaze to their hands. He looks...upset. A little sad about her words. Y/n squeezes his fingers, drawing his attention back to her face.

"If you want to you can use my stuff tonight and if you like it we'll get you some too?"

Immediately his eyes light up, lips spreading into a smile. "You'd do that with me? Like show me how and everything?"

Y/n giggles, her heart wanting to burst with love for the man in front of her. "Of course I would. Can even use my other headband."

"The one with the bunny ears?"

She nods, amused by his eagerness. "Okay." He says, rising from the counter and releasing her hand to dig through the drawer for her white bunny headband. She gets him a clean towel while he slips the cotton over his head, pushing it up his forehead so the ears rest just in front of the frizzy bun on his head.

While Harry lathers her cleanser into his face, paying special attention to his forehead and hairline, y/n rolls her jade stone over her face before cleaning it for Harry. She can't help but giggle at the way his face crinkles and pouts as he focuses, his tongue poking out of his mouth.

"M'being thorough." He mumbles, not even glancing at her. Once his face has been rinsed and dried, she instructs him to sit back on the countertop. Harry does so, excitement buzzing from him as she stands between his thighs.

He's watching her intently when she reaches for the toner and serum he loves so much, and she takes a moment to button their mouths together. Sometimes it's difficult for her to imagine this man in a boxing ring, fighting simply because he loves it. Harry gently takes a hold of her waist, tilting his chin up so she can better apply it to his face.

"The toner cleans your face a bit more and gets off extra dirt and stuff that the wash didn't get." She explains, swiping the cotton ball over every inch of his face. He hums his acknowledgement, trying not to move when she drips serum onto his cheeks and forehead.

"This moisturizes. It's the stuff that smells real good too." Harry fights back a small smile, a sluggish blink dulling his eyes. They still brim with happiness, but he looks peaceful, enjoying the feeling of her fingers massaging his cheeks and jaw. She wipes her hands off, reaching for the little tube next.

"This is pimple cream. You just put it on where you actually have noticeable pimples but only a bit or it'll burn and itch." She says, squeezing some on her pointer finger. Then she dabs it to his face, remaining gentle.

"Wha's next?" He finally questions, his accent thicker with sleepiness. Y/n smiles, adjusting the crooked headband on his forehead.

"Moisturizer. Then roller."

Harry's head lulls back when she applied the moisturizer to his face, rubbing small circles into his soft skin. His whole body has melted into a cooked noodle-like state, a lazy smile on his lips. Before he can fall asleep on the counter, y/n gently rolls the stone up his neck and under his jaw. His eyes flutter shut, a satisfied purr rumbling his chest when she rolls it over his cheeks and under his eyes.

"Don't fall asleep on me baby," she murmurs gently, rolling over his cheeks and under his eyes. He hums, smiling peacefully at the feeling of the massager.

"Didn't know it felt so relaxing," he whispers "no wonder you're also so sleepy after this."

She finishes with the bridge of his nose, sealing the process with a kiss to his nose. "You're so handsome Harry," she says after she's put the roller away. He blinks his eyes open, cheeks squished when she cups his face. "Spots or no spots I've never seen another man as beautiful as you."

A blush rises to his dimpled cheeks. "Thank you darling, I like when you call me beautiful."

"Yeah?"

Bashfully, he nods. "Makes me feel....soft. Or gentle ya know?"

She looks over his face, heart softening at the bunny ears on his head and the sleepiness of his eyes, and she thinks about he spends his life doing violent things but he's really just a teddy bear at heart. All he needed was for someone to love that side of him as well.

"I'll always tell you that you're beautiful." She promises, giggling when he pecks a few kisses to her jaw.

"Beautiful, but manly right?"

Snickering, she nods. "The manliest bub."

[sorrelchestnut]

🎉 What leads you to consider a fic a success?

Only if you're still up for answering of course!

(For the Fanfic Writer Emoji askmeme, still taking prompts if anyone wants to play!)

So I'd be lying if I tried to claim that a lot of attention/comments/etc doesn't make a fic feel like a success. It just does. "Look, I made this thing completely from scratch, and people like it!" Even if I'm not always completely satisfied, knowing that large numbers of people love a thing - or even smaller numbers of really vocal and thoughtful people - makes me feel successful. It just does.

But outside of the obvious external validation, a story feels like a success when I feel like it does the thing I set out to do. Sometimes it's executing on an interesting concept or just saying something I feel is important about a character. Pretty much no one really read Beholder but I think it's one of my better stories anyway, because re-watching Buffy as an adult left me with things to say and I think that fic said them very well. A Wiser Fool was actually pretty popular but even so I get a lot more satisfaction of clawing back part of a narrative tragedy that always infuriated me into something I find bittersweet but actually satisfying. And then there's set upon a golden bough to sing, which might be the proudest of in the sense of executing on a very specific vision and somehow managing to write exactly the story I set out to write, with very little in the way of detour. That never happens!

That being said, the truest measure of a successful story is fucking finishing it. Especially in the instances where I've drifted away from the story and still manage to come back and finish it. And I'll never promise that it'll happen every time - a lot of my WIPs are destined to remain unfinished, alas - but by god the sense of pride I get when I manage to do it is second to none.

[writer-dreams]

Colors (Draco Malfoy X Reader)

I'll be honest, I've had this one fully written since last week. I've just been very nervous to post it because the ending is so bad 😅. I haven't been sure how to fix it and I've re-written it several times. This fic is definitely rushed but hey, it's a one-shot (and I wanted to try writing something short and sweet for once). This is still part of the Cliche Month Challenge by @wreckofawriter (sorry this was so late). I've finally gained enough courage to post it and I hope you enjoy this messy fic.

Prompt: An AU where you can only see the shades of your soulmate's eyes until you first touch.

House: You choose

Blood Status: You choose

Warnings: Possible swearing

Note: Again, very messy. Not sure I like this one too much. The reader in this story is female / uses female pronouns.

Word Count: 1,694 words

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

3rd Person POV

Y/n opened her eyes to see the world was still the same shade of steel grey. She longed to know what the world truly looked like, to see actual colors other than this grey. When she was younger, she was ecstatic to learn that someone out there was destined to be with her. She used to fantasize about meeting her soulmate, seeing in color and her falling in love. She imagined what her soulmate would look like, what their personality was like, their likes and dislikes.

Now, as she grew older, she began to develop fears. What if they didn't like her? Even if the universe had put them together, there was still a chance they could reject her. What if she didn't like them? She never considered herself to be a picky person, especially when it came to love, but that didn't mean that they couldn't have a horrible personality. All of her friends have already met with their soulmates, and it did seem like they matched each other perfectly. They always talked about how beautiful the world was and how they couldn't wait until she could see the colors too.

She snapped out of her thoughts. Taking a deep breath, she walked off to the courtyard, hoping a good book could distract her from the whole soulmate situation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/n wasn't sure how much time had passed when she finally finished her book. A few hours, at least. She looked around the courtyard, seeing that she was the only one there. She sighed, deciding to go back inside. Y/n looked at the sky, dreaming about the day she could finally see the blue sky her friends talked about. She wondered how beautiful the night sky looked when it was in full color, how pretty a sunset could be. Yet, all she could see was grey. She was almost at the point where she would begin to resent the color. Still, she remained patient, still trying to hold on to the small shred of hope that she would someday meet the one.

On her way in, she bumped into someone rather harshly. The two fell back, Y/n closing her eyes and rubbing her head gently from where it hit the ground. When she opened her eyes, her mind was blown as suddenly, she could see the world in color. Amazed, Y/n slowly took in her surroundings, admiring the green grass and the blue sky. She looked at the bark of the trees, the castle, the white fluffy clouds. Her eyes began to fill with tears as she slowly let it all sink in. She could see, she could finally see! It was all so much more beautiful than she could have ever imagined.

The boy in front of her got up with a groan. In her dazed state, Y/n had almost forgotten about him. She looked back at him to see platinum blonde hair and grey eyes looking back at her. Her face immediately became shocked as she recognized that familiar face, those eyebrows, those thin lips, those sharp cheekbones. Draco Malfoy.

Said boy looked back at her with the same shocked eyes. He glanced quickly around him, an astonished expression on his face. His grey eyes landed back on her, almost in disbelief.

"You're my—" They both whispered.

Y/n couldn't do this. Even when he didn't know they were soulmates, Draco Malfoy was a bigoted twat. How could the universe possibly pair her up with him? Y/n shook her head, before she got up and quickly retreated to her dormitory. She could hear Draco calling after her but she ignored him and simply kept running.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When she arrived, most of her friends were already there, talking amongst each other on their beds. At the sound of the door opening, they all turned their heads and greeted her. Y/n still couldn't believe that she could see in color because of Draco Malfoy. Now, she could see the color or her friend's hairs and their eyes. She turned to a mirror and examined her reflection, playing with her (h/c) hair. She could see that she had (e/c) eyes, which was so surprising, considering that she had only seen a grey version of herself for years.

"Hey, Y/n! I just want you to know that you're beautiful and you better not be saying bad things about yourself to that mirror!" (F/n) said.

"I'm not....I just...."

"You'll find your soulmate eventually, Y/n. Then you can finally see how pretty you are." Another friend reassured.

Y/n smiled back at her, not sure if she should tell her friends that she met them and that it was the worst possible matchup ever. She decided against it, telling herself that the universe had made a mistake. There was no way that Malfoy was her soulmate, she refused to believe it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Almost a week had passed after that incident and Y/n was still avoiding Draco. She could see him trying to reach out to her but she would quickly lose him in the crowded hallways. Everyday, every hour, she was playing a game of avoidance cat and mouse. She had gotten pretty good at it too, swiftly navigating her way through all the students.

Today was just another one of those days. There she was again, quickly walking through the crowds, afraid that she would see Malfoy and have to talk to him. Luckily for her, she managed to make it to class without running into him. She settled into her seat next to her friends, who were quietly gossiping to each other.

"Malfoy's been pretty quiet lately. Hasn't been taunting Potter or anything. He's not even picking on any first years."

"Maybe Dumbledore's finally had enough of his behaviour. Or maybe his father threatened to ground him or something."

Y/n stayed silent, listening in to their conversation. Great, even if she could physically escape Malfoy, he was still there in conversation. It really seemed like the universe was insistent that it was right with this pairing.

"Could you guys stop talking about Malfoy? He's old news anyway. Who cares if he's not bullying anyone for once? Maybe he's actually become a decent person." Y/n snapped.

Her friends looked at each other. "What's gotten you so riled up? You care about him or something?"

"Nothing. I just don't wanna hear about him. Let's just focus on the class, okay?"

Her friends nodded slowly, looking at her suspiciously before they changed the topic of their conversation. Why did she defend him? Everyone, including her, knew that he was a prat and that wasn't changing. Y/n sighed quietly, feeling frustrated. Another thing she had kept to herself was a feeling of longing for the blonde male. He appeared in her dreams like a prince offering to sweep her off her feet. She'd feel drawn to him when she saw him in the hallways, even when she forced herself to stay away from him. Y/n was afraid as to what it could mean, she couldn't accept the truth.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After classes ended, she continued through her usual route back to her dormitory. Unfortunately for her, Draco Malfoy was waiting for her right at the entrance. She quickly turned to try and make a getaway but he grabbed her arm.

"Wait. L/n, can we please talk?"

"What's there to talk about?" Y/n asked coldly, even when her heart fluttered at his touch.

"Just, come with me." Draco began pulling her away as Y/n rolled her eyes and allowed him to drag her.

He took her to an empty hallway, where he finally let her go. Y/n looked at him expectantly, putting her hands on her hips. She knew this was coming, there was no avoiding it, especially when the universe constantly pushed them together. The universe can rot in hell.

"So...we both know that we're.....soulmates. Why do you avoid it?" He sounded hurt, and Y/n's heart ached at the thought of that.

"Because, you're Draco Malfoy. You bully Potter and practically everyone else in this school. All you care about is blood status, the Slytherin house, and impressing your arsehole daddy. You're a spoiled brat who acts like you're entitled to everything, and I refuse to be one of those things just because I'm your 'soulmate'." Y/n growled at him.

He seemed to take everything she said into consideration, which was extremely out of character for him. "I can change, Y/n. I can change for you. In fact, I already have. Haven't you noticed how silent I've been? It's been the talk of the school this entire week." He said, desperately. Y/n wondered why he was so persistent, why did he continuously chase her, even when she actively ran away?

"You feel it too, don't you? A pull to me, like a bond?" Draco asked, watching her carefully. Y/n didn't answer but her silence gave her away. "I feel it too. I see you in my dreams and Merlin, I feel my heart race when I see you. I know you think this is a mistake, but the universe doesn't make mistakes. I love you, Y/n. Just give me a chance to prove it." Draco took her hand softly.

Y/n felt it. Some sort of invisible bond tying her to him. The universe had her in its clutches and it would not let her go. She felt her heart tighten and she sighed. What could it hurt to try? Clearly, the universe wasn't giving up on this and maybe there was a good reason for that. She remembered that feeling of longing for the Slytherin boy and bit her lip.

Damn it all.

She took Draco's face and smashed her lips against his. It felt like everything clicked into place as he held her face and kissed back. His lips fit perfectly against hers and she could feel the world around them stop. It was as if the universe was satisfied with its work and was allowing them to enjoy their moment. She pulled away and opened her eyes, the colors around her seemingly more vibrant than before. Draco looked at her with the widest smile on his face.

"I'll take that as a yes?" He chuckled.

"Don't make me regret it, soulmate." Y/n smiled back.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

Permanent Taglist (if your name is crossed out, I couldn't tag you for some reason):

@my-name-is-jazzy-x

**********************************************

Thank you so much for reading! This was pretty hard to write (I guess I'm not that good at soulmate AU's yet 😅). I hope it wasn't too horrible to read. Yes, I am still working on requests while I'm writing these things (I promise). Thank you again for reading and I hope you enjoyed. Until next time.

-Jade

[foreignobjecticus]

Blake's 7 2x13: Star One comments

I wish I'd started writing my little comments after the first episode but it just occurred to me now to do so.

Posting on app so will add cut in very shortly

Have just found out that this is the CLIFFHANGER ending to the second season. Damn you Terry Nation!!

This was a fantastic episode (series two as a whole has been on the up and up after a fairly average end to season one) but there were good points and bad points.

FINALLY they don't all immediately get captured after they've teleported down to the planet. It's so rare for these guys, and rarer still to get much use out of Cally's telepathy, but for once their quick thinking actually paid off in a believable and satisfying way for the viewer.

Avon's dialogue was amazing - the guy finally gets a chance to reel off a whole slew of amazing one-liners from start to finish. It was immensely satisfying to see him have the chance to threaten Travis with lines like "talk or scream", and the advent of ACTUAL blood & gore after being shot with the Liberator's weapons was a touch that was until now sorely lacking.

A very special shout out to the scene where Blake meets the head scientist. "Who's this?" (Scientist looking at Cally) Blake: "My mother." And his quick quip with his hand was *chef kiss* fantastic, but don't think we didn't notice the eyepatch comment being ignored,Mr. Director.

I don't think we've had a Vila/Jenna combination stay back on the ship for quite a while by this episode, but it was nice to see the two together developing their relationship. I do feel sorry for Jenna a bit though: by this episode,I think she's hardly managed to get off the ship apart from the quick jaunt in Freedom City. It's understandable when there's only 6 of them and it's kind of a given that at least Blake goes down, but it would be nice to see the women involved a bit more outside the ship. Side note: Jenna's decision to involve the Federation so early on was a great move on her character's part and really led credence to the gravity of the situation (pun intended?).

There was a fantastic sense of depth and mystery brought into the first half of the episode with Orac revealing details of the satellites outside the edge of the galaxy. Vila & Jenna's panic at discovering 600+ alien spacecraft coming into radar range just outside the minefield, and then breaching the deactivated minefield was exciting and epic in a scale that hasn't been felt since - I'd go so far as to say - the first episode. Especially after the previous episode (The Keeper) where all the focus and action remained almost exclusively in a Visigoth hall, bringing the conflict out into space drastically expanded the possibilities for the plot to progress.

Let's all take a minute here to appreciate the until-now unaddressed issue that is Travis's motives... WHAT THE HELL is he doing teaming up with the aliens to help them obliterate humanity? WHERE DID THIS COME FROM????? In the last episode, and basically all after being cast out of the Federation, Travis is working on a small-scale personal mission to find Star One much like Blake is, and along the way of he kills Blake, all the better. Yet despite being several steps ahead of Blake, Travis doesn't rock up at Star One until much later (Liberator's speed be damned, but this is just one small point). Now I'll admit we don't get to see that much into Travis's motives, but we've been with the guy since day for; he might be a colossal immoral arsehole, but he's not a complete lunatic. WHY make a pact to destroy humanity? There's SO much involved in that that Travis would not reasonably be able to orchestrate without being AT Star One or at least near enough the edge of the galaxy. And the motivation is??? Travis's vendetta is with Blake, Servalan, and to a lesser extent the Federation; without humanity, how will he lord it over people? "It's just a shame they'll never know who did it" or whatever his line was. Yeah Travis, no shit. You literally didn't think this through, did you? The more I think about it, the more this alien invasion seems like a last-minute plot change to make the episode more interesting. Don't get me wrong, colossal motivational plot bunny aside, I am VErY much looking forward to addressing the alien armada issue. IF there is an issue to address next season.

OH BOY Blake man, I thought you were a goner! I've been a little on edge about it for ages because I saw a clip of him bloody on the ground, but so far I've not got actual spoilers (I ALMOST did just reading the overly-thorough series synopsis on YouTube though - jeeze). A bit sadistic, but it was good to see Blake cut down and then later on stumbling to the flight deck and getting turned away by Avon. That little scene was very in character and quite touching if a little heartbreaking, but it felt like what I as the viewer wanted to see - it was a logical way to deal with the situation based on the characters involved. (Throughout the second series Blake has also been teetering between logical and completely NUTS, so this concession to Avon was a nice and unexpected touch. The line earlier in the episode about "proving I was right" is very apt and captures his fanatical, slightly unhinged mental state perfectly while still managing to be a lovable leader and retaining the loyalty of his crew).

Anyway those are all the points I discussed with my bf after the episode ended. The episode was enjoyable overall and definitely a stronger one than some we have seen before, especially after the weaker last episode. To sum it all up, all I can say is: finally gotcha Travis.

[echoes-of-realities]

be my fire in the cold (and I'll be waiting by the mistletoe) - 5/25

* * *

[From the Start] // [Fanfiction] // [ao3]

[Previous Chapter] // [Next Chapter]

Chapter Summary: Tina and Santana have a long talk; Santana wishes she was better at comforting people.

Chapter 5: but some are sick of this grey

///

“If that’s anyone besides Santana don’t you dare come in!”

Santana rolls her eyes and eases the door open, finding Tina standing in front of the mirror of her vanity wearing only her tights and sports bra. “You know it’s a little suspicious that I’m allowed in here when you’re half-naked but your boyfriend’s not,” she comments idly.

Santana can see Tina roll her eyes in the mirror as she touches the mascara brush to her eyes one more time before capping the tube and dropping it on top of the pile of her makeup. “Mike doesn’t knock.”

“Still,” Santana repeats teasingly, “suspicious.” 

Tina huffs out a laugh as she shakes her head. “Sure it is, you’re like the only other person who ever comes down here that’s not another principal or a dresser,” she says easily.

Santana hums in agreement. “And I’ve seen you in less, so,” she teases.

Tina just rolls her eyes as she tugs a loose shirt, turning and leaning her hip against the vanity, her arms crossed with a grin. “So is this an official visit?”

“Why do you need to know?”

“I wanna know if I can make fun of you or not.”

Santana snorts out a laugh. “As if it matters, we both know you’ll make fun of me either way,” she complains. Tina concedes with a wide, knowing grin. “But I have a couple notes to go over,” Santana continues, smacking the palm of her right hand with her notebook as she makes herself at home on Tina’s couch, propping her feet up on the coffee table. “So come sit.”

Tina laughs and crosses the room to collapse on the couch beside her best friend. Santana quickly flips through her notebook until she finds the pages she’s looking for, going over some blocking issues and a music cue that Schue missed last show that threw Tina off a little bit. Once she’s done she groans and lets her head loll onto the back of the couch, trying to roll out the tension in her neck. “I need a coffee,” she decides.

Tina smiles. “Lucky for you, Brittany went on a coffee run not too long ago, and she dropped an extra one off with me on the off chance that you dropped by.”

Santana’s smile is involuntary, and she tries not to let it be known how warm her cheeks are, but Tina’s not her best friend for nothing and she smirks at Santana knowingly as she crosses to the vanity to grab the two coffees sitting there.

“You got time to sit and drink it?” Tina asks.

Santana checks her watch as Tina hands over her coffee. “I mean, probably not, but no one should be unlucky enough to see me until I’m properly caffeinated, so sure.”

Tina laughs and resettles on the couch. “Good, I feel like I’ve barely seen you despite the fact that we’re in the same building like nine hours a day.” Santana grunts in acknowledgement as she gulps down a long sip of coffee, pleasantly surprised to find that it tastes exactly how she likes it; it’s far more lukewarm than hot, but just the fact that Brittany thought of her when getting coffee makes warmth settle in her stomach anyways. “I know we haven’t had time to talk about it since Thanksgiving,” Tina continues, “but did you think about Christmas?”

Santana sighs and drops her coffee to rest in her lap, shaking her head. “I appreciate the offer, but I think I’ll just stay home.” She doesn’t add the again, but they can both hear it, too loud in the following silence.

“You sure?” Tina murmurs, “My parents would love to have you. They haven’t stopped talking about the flan de queso you brought to Thanksgiving, and they keep asking if you’ve accepted the invitation yet.”

Santana shrugs uncomfortably. “You know I’m not great company this time of year,” she says. 

Tina sighs but she knows Santana well enough to know when to drop it. They sip their coffee silently for a long moment, before Tina turns expectantly towards Santana. “Wanna know the latest gossip?” she whispers dramatically.

Santana laughs and sits up a little more, more than grateful for the change in subject, turning towards Tina and feeling like they’re back in their college dorm, sitting cross-legged on their beds and talking about everything and nothing. “Always. I gotta keep track of whatever dumbass decisions this company makes. Remember how awkward Sister Act was our second year of college?”

“God!” Tina laughs, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you turn so red than when Kate and Christian started going at it!”

“How the fuck was I supposed to know that they broke up the night before?” Santana protests, her voice bright with amusement. “They weren’t even in the scene together and somehow they managed to mortify me, the company, our professor, and the entire audience.”

“I’ve never seen you so lost for words before, but the look on your face when you had to chase after Christian and actually get on stage in the middle of the scene to physically restrain them? Priceless!”

Santana rolls her eyes at herself. “I was so scared Hagberg was going to fail me, but she just bought me a box of chocolates instead.” She takes a sip of her coffee before looking expectantly at Tina. “Now, what do I need to know about here to avoid being forced to jump on stage in the middle of The Nutcracker?”

Tina grins and sets her coffee down on the coffee table, and that’s how Santana knows she’s about to get a list of gossip a mile long. She feels like she needs to write down a list of all the connections, but she also has a feeling that it would get so tangled and convoluted it would be near impossible to understand. Rachel and Finn have a messy on-again-off-again relationship that somehow Quinn, that St. James guy from sound, and Brody from maintenance have all gotten mixed up in at some point; Puck and Quinn refuse to talk to each other unless absolutely necessary; Kurt and Blaine had a messy breakup and Karofsky somehow ended up caught up in it; Schue’s ex-wife showed up near the start of rehearsals claiming to be pregnant with his baby, and it made things super awkward when Emma, his new girlfriend, showed up at the same time; Shelby from the pit band was caught making out with Puck the second month of rehearsals; Sue, the theatrical producer, and Schue have a nasty rivalry still ongoing despite the fact that no one, not even them, know how or when it started; Kitty, The Snow Queen, dated Artie before he was hired, and then it got weird and they broke up and now don’t speak; Jane, Brittany’s understudy, and Mason, Mike’s understudy, have adorable but obvious crushes on each other, but both of them are too shy to do anything about it; Zizes once dated Puck, which makes Santana’s head spin because Zizes is pretty cool and Puck is so slimy. 

Santana shakes her head slowly as she taps her empty coffee cup against her thigh. “This is insane,” she mutters. “I need a spreadsheet and seven hours just to figure half of this out.”

Tina laughs. “It’s pretty messy,” she agrees, “And it’s all only happened since we started rehearsals.” 

Santana chews on her lip, wondering if she should even ask the question she so desperately wants to know, but before she can debate it she’s already asking it. She wishes she could blame her lack of filter on her exhaustion, but she finished her coffee ages ago. “What about Brittany?” she blurts, aiming for nonchalant but landing somewhere far past too-invested.

“Apparently she dated Artie for a little bit when they were in college, but she always conveniently ‘forgets’ that.” Tina laughs, her eyes sparkling knowingly as she regards her best friend. “But I haven’t heard of her dating anyone since we started rehearsals months ago, inside the company or out.”

Santana tries desperately to remain calm and collected with that information, but she can’t hide the way her stomach flips or the smile she’s fighting. “Cool,” she manages, leaning forward to put her empty coffee cup on the table and avoiding Tina’s eyes.

“What about you? Meet any nice girls lately?” Tina teases, grinning widely at how obvious Santana is about her little crush. “Besides Brittany,” she whispers, deftly dodging Santana’s flailing arm as she reaches out to smack her.

Santana draws back and rolls her eyes so hard that she shakes her head a little. “As if. You know I’m too busy with work.”

Tina just stares blankly at Santana, a thoroughly unimpressed look in her eyes. “Santana, I mean this from the bottom of my heart, but that’s bullshit. Work isn’t your entire life.” Santana scoffs but Tina doesn’t let her shut down. “Listen, I totally understand if you just don’t feel like dating anyone right now, but you can’t use work as an excuse.”

“Hey, I went on a date when I was covering for the stage manager on Anastasia back in August!” Santana protests, but as soon as the words leave her mouth she knows it’s a weak argument.

“What? The girl from that startup band? You went on one date and never mentioned her again,” Tina says, and Santana knows that, no matter how much she wants to protest, she can’t argue that point. “What was even her name?”

Santana opens her mouth but finds her mind has gone completely blank. “Uh, Dina?”

“Dana?”

“No wait, wasn’t it like a unisex name or something? Daniel?”

“Daniella?”

“Dani!” Santana shouts, snapping her fingers and pointing at Tina with a proud grin for finally remembering the name. “It was Dani!”

“Right!” Tina’s satisfied expression turns sly. “You know, this just proves my point. You need to find a nice girl whose name you can actually remember. Like maybe Brittany.”

“Oh, shut up,” Santana says with an eye roll, flustered and bashful. 

There’s movement from the hallway, the sound of someone dropping something bouncy and heavy footsteps as they chase after it. Tina quickly stands up and crosses the dressing room, sticking her head out into the hallway and looking both ways; if someone just broke a prop she feels the need to warn them before Santana finds out and goes on the war path. When she doesn’t see anyone she just shrugs and closes the door. “You’re not getting out of this conversation,” Tina threatens as she turns around.

Santana plays with the notebook in her hands. “I’m too busy with still learning this show, you know that.”

Tina studies her for a long moment and Santana fidgets under her scrutiny. “I’m not going to push it,” Tina says slowly, “But I think you deserve to let yourself be happy.” Santana sucks in a quick breath and resolutely doesn’t look at Tina. Her first instinct is to argue and get defensive, but she can’t quite get the words to form in her mouth. Tina sighs and crosses back to the couch, sitting down beside Santana a little closer than she normally would, ducking her head down under Santana’s until Santana is forced to meet her eyes. “It’s been four years,” she whispers, “She would want you to be happy. Whether that’s with some nice girl or with some new hobby or whatever, it doesn’t really matter. But this,” Tina pauses and Santana’s eyes cut away from hers, “this relentless, constant pace you’ve set for yourself isn’t healthy. When was the last time you actually took time off that wasn’t a no show day?”

Santana can feel the tremble in her chin and she chokes down the thickness she can feel in her throat, choking her. Tina shifts on the couch until she can wrap an arm around Santana and draw her into her embrace. She wants to struggle against her best friend’s arm, but Tina’s always given the best hugs. “I just don’t want to see you burnout,” Tina continues.

Santana lets herself be held for a moment before she shakes Tina off and stands abruptly. “I’ve gotta finish giving notes,” she rasps.

Tina sighs but nods. “Half hour is coming up soon anyways,” she agrees, “And I’ve gotta get Kurt to fix some things on my skirt.”

Santana ducks her head as she crosses the room, barely giving Tina a second glance. Tina just shakes her head and lets her friend go, staring at the empty coffee cups on the coffee table and hoping that she didn’t just cause Santana to close herself off again.

“Tina,” Santana suddenly calls from the doorway, waiting until Tina glances up at her before continuing, “I know you worry. I’m just— Work keeps my mind off of her, you know? When I’m busy I don’t think about her as much, especially this month.” Tina’s face crumples a little and she nods in understanding. “But you’re right, I could probably use a break,” she admits, “The next no show day is Monday. We should actually do something, all three of us, instead of me spending the my only day off working anyways. Maybe we can go to the mall and do some Christmas shopping?”

Tina brightens and smiles. “That sounds really good,” she says.

Santana shifts awkwardly before giving her friend a small smile. “Thanks for— For looking out for me, or whatever.”

Tina laughs, knowing that sometimes it’s best to just let Santana stumble through her emotions without too much teasing. “It’s practically my second job by this point,” she says easily, “Now you better go and finish yours.”

Santana rolls her eyes but sends Tina a fond, grateful smile before slipping out the door and heading down the principal hallway towards the stage.

//

As the evening wears on, Santana decides to just give notes before the show tomorrow because she’s so tired from running around the entire show trying to deal with the technical issues they’ve been having with the flies. Karofsky still has no idea what is happening with them, even after him and Santana messed with them for about forty minutes after the show. He offered to stay even later to try and fix them, and while Santana appreciated the offer, she just sent him and the rest of the automaton crew home, telling them meet her a couple hours earlier than usual tomorrow so they can figure it out.

She’s not sure why she ends up in the principal hallway; she knows Mike and Tina have already left, and she doesn’t have anything she needs to check on since she’s giving notes tomorrow, but her feet lead her down the stairs before she realizes where she’s going. She figures she’ll just check in on whoever is still lingering down there, but because she’s alone she can’t quite hide the fact that she’s only really hoping to check in with one person.

Most of the doors are closed and locked as she wanders down the hallway. She runs into Mason, who is just heading out after looking around for Mike to ask him a couple questions. Santana chats with him for a little bit and promises to let Mike know he was looking for him before waving goodbye and heading further down the hallway. The lights are a little dimmed, and as she heads for the end of the hallway she can hear a muffled conversation. She slows as she approaches the only door that’s cracked open; the lights to Brittany’s dressing room cast the hallway around her door a little brighter, and Santana stops just before she reaches the door.

She’s about to turn around and leave, figuring she can just talk to Brittany talk tomorrow when she’s giving notes, it’s not like she ever has many to give her anyways so she’ll definitely be able to spend a couple extra minutes with her just talking, when she hears a sniffle. She freezes and waits for a long moment, Brittany’s voice distorted and muffled by her door. When she hears that sniffle again, followed by a choked sob, something in Santana’s chest shifts and shatters a little at the sound.

She’s pushing the door open and entering the dressing room before she realizes it, and Brittany glances up at her in shock. They stand there staring, wide-eyed and worried, at each other for long drawn out moments. Brittany still has her phone pressed to her ear, tears streaming down her face and making her skin shine wetly against the redness blotching her face. “Uh, I’ll call you back, mom,” she mumbles, and now that her voice isn’t muffled by the door Santana can hear exactly how tight and wet it is. “No, no, it’s fine. Just the stage manager. I’ll call you when I get home.” She pauses, sniffling, while her mom says something over the phone. “Yeah, I will. Love you too.” She hangs up and suddenly Santana becomes aware of how rude it was for her to barge into Brittany’s dressing room like that, but she looks so heartsick that Santana can’t find it in herself to regret it; no one should be alone when they look so miserable.

“Sorry,” Brittany chokes, scrubbing furiously at her face, “I was just—”

“No, Britt,” Santana interrupts, taking a couple quick steps forward, “I’m sorry for eavesdropping and barging in here but are— Are you okay?”

Brittany looks about ready say yes, even though they both know how obvious of a lie it would be, before her face falls and she slowly shakes her head. Something deep in Santana’s chest aches at the look on Brittany’s face.

“Was this— Was this the thing you were sad about yesterday?” Santana whispers. Brittany nods hopelessly and Santana sucks in a breath. “Oh, Britt, I’m really sorry.” Brittany gives her a small wavering smile, but it drops as her eyes fall to the floor. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Brittany takes a deep, steadying breath. “I— Um— That was my mom,” she manages to whisper, “They just had to put our cat down.” Santana sucks in a breath; she’s never had a pet before, they were too expensive and high maintenance for her mom, who was a full time shift worker, when they lived in Ohio, and their apartment didn’t allow pets once they moved to New York, but she remembers how devastating it was when Tina’s family had to put down their dog in their second year of college. “He’s just— We’ve had him since I was eight,” Brittany explains in a croak, “He’s been in our family longer than my sister has. And I— Sometimes I had a hard time at school with— Schoolwork and making friends and whatever. But he was just a cat, you know? He didn’t care if I was failing math or if Katie stopped talking to me, he just wanted treats and snuggles.”

“Britt, I’m so sorry,” Santana whispers, feeling completely and utterly inadequate. “I don’t— I’m just sorry.”

Brittany sniffles and blinks rapidly. When her eyes meet Santana’s they’re too bright and shiny and Santana wants so desperately to take away the grief cracking the beautiful blue there. “He’s been really sick for a couple weeks,” she explains, “But I haven’t been able to go home and see him because of the show and I’m just— I wish I could have seen him one more time before— Before—” she chokes herself off.

“Do you want a hug?” Santana blurts without thinking.

“What?” Brittany croaks. 

Santana suddenly remembers that she’s technically only known this woman for five days, despite the fact that they spend most of their waking hours in the same building and seem to have an uncanny ability to run into each other outside of the theatre and that it feels a little bit like she’s known Brittany for years. “I— Never mind. I just— You looked so sad and— I mean hugs usually help so,” Santana trails off lamely. 

Brittany chokes on a sob and nods. “A hug would be nice.”

Santana breathes out a sigh of relief that she didn’t just creep Brittany out and takes the last few steps to Brittany, hoping that a hug will make her feel better, even if it’s just for a moment. She hesitantly opens her arms and Brittany immediately falls into her; she fits against Santana easily, their ribs locking together as Brittany clings to her, muffling her sobs against Santana’s shoulder and neck. Santana sighs and soothingly runs her hands over Brittany’s back, just letting Brittany cry without saying anything, knowing how cathartic it can be to just let someone else take your weight for a while.

She’s not sure how, but they eventually end up huddled together on the couch, and Santana keeps her arms around Brittany until she sighs and swallows thickly, wiping at her eyes with trembling fingers. “This is just another reason December and Christmastime sucks,” she mutters. 

Santana hesitates for a moment before tightening her arm around Brittany; Brittany melts further into Santana’s embrace, boneless and heavy, and any awkwardness Santana feels nudging at her consciousness eases. “You’ve got that right,” she sighs.

[isaiah-lee]

⠀⠀⠀ 𝐌𝐌𝐗𝐈𝐗 : ⠀⠀⠀ January, The InterContinental ⠀⠀⠀ Jakarta. The Lee & Enrille ⠀⠀⠀ Family Dinner.

ISAIAH: The collaboration between The Lee Entertainment and Lavigné had nearly ten years. Alicia, the founder of Lavigné, had a great influence on the growth of Lee Entertainment; her strategic approach and effective problem solving have left Isaiah mesmerized. As her business partner, he acknowledged her ability to convert those into their day-to-day activities. Vice versa, the models of Lee Entertainment have been the regular client of Lavigné. The company helped Lavigné to elevate its sales from time to time as well. Everyone does know ever since Isaiah running the company, The Lee Entertainment's models' image morphed into a phenomenon. They have influenced society's perceptions of beauty ideals in Indonesia, and every major fashion designer and publication keeps an eye on them. Lavigné, with ease, gains those benefits. They had the privileges to access their models over the years.

"This is the longest meeting ever, Isa."

"I know, right."

"And I haven't picked any dress for tonight."

"You will look good with anything."

"Oh, no wonder you are the Lee."

Alicia never had enough bragging about him being a Lee, and not everybody can tease him with his family, but for Alicia, he let it slides. People might be thinking they had a sort of special relationship, but they are not. It comes out because Graham showers her with compliments; just like him, Isaiah does the same. Only by nature does he do that without hidden agenda behind it, and Alicia does know that too.

"So, your family doesn't mind with the dinner."

"Mhm, it's our tenth year working together. Let's consider this as a celebration."

"Actually, I didn't even remember that. How can I take it into consideration? But that was a good one. It's just... It has been a while we didn't have dinner between the families."

"I don't even remember when the last time we had dinner. You did the right thing by taking the initiative about dinner." Isaiah gives a light nod in agreement. "Then, I'll see you at night," Alicia added while stood up.

"Sure, see you."

────────────────

Isaiah escorted The Enrille to enter the private dining room he had booked in The Intercontinental. When they had passed the door, the two families soon enjoyed the easy, and the conversation began free-flowing between the two.

"I hope you don't mind, and my granddaughter will join the dinner too. She has been staying in Vienna for months. Please don't mind this old lady for missing her granddaughter so much until she couldn't wait for even a second." Laughter filled the room.

"Please, we'd like to know more about the Lee other than Isaiah here." A smile tugging in his lips to the jests given by Alicia, The Enrille barely in touch with anyone in the Lee other than him yet. Valentine will be coming in minutes, and it has been a while for him not to met her either.

VALENTINE: She just landed a while ago from Vienna, she thought she has gotten used to the hours and hours of flight but she’s pretty mistaken. She still got the worst headaches and half of the reason behind it is from the exhaustion from work. She just wrapped up her last grand recital in Wiener Staatsoper. She has performed in numerous well known recitals for the whole year, she barely give herself a rest for thisㅡ but she thought this is nothing than her school year back in Julliard. After graduating, she has only participated in classic concerts and recitals that is held abroad. Vienna, New York, Polandㅡ give it a list, she has done a lot in a year but none of them in Indonesia. She’s been avoiding every requests from her Grand mother, Adine Lee to hold a solo recital in Jakarta. She thought, people will see her as Valentine Leeㅡ the privileged princess from The Lee family that is so lucky to have her solo concert already by the age of 24. Her last prejudice is that people will look at her with envy, for how easy her paved road of life is. Instead of eyes of admiration for how she play the piano.

She’s so used to that stereotyping and prejudice, for God sake she has live with that. But her pride, passion and the love for classical music is bigger than ever. She didn’t want to stain the last thing she’s been doing with sincerity, to ended up being a public stunt for her family’s reputation. She has succeed to avoid one, but she’s not that powerful to decline a dinner invitation. Her pitch black Mercedes Benz S-Class is taking her to some place, she let out a sigh knowing that she can’t sleep right away. She fixed some of her make up, hair and her outfit. She could’ve worn something more comfortable for flights but to know that she need to go to this dinner straight from the airport, she’s now wearing a black shirt with Chanel’s tweed jacket with a matching skirt.

“Nona Valentine, sudah sampai. Tuan Graham dan yang lainnya juga sudah sampai tadi. “

Her chauffeur said by the moment she finished glittering herself. She looked at her cushion’s mirror for one last time, She believes that girl inside it is ready for any battle she need to be present at, the whole universe is kind enough to give her almost everything. Her face feature for the first example, her red cherry lips, her round big eyes. Even when she’s pretty tired and exhausted right now, she’s pretty satisfied with how she looks.

“Terima kasih, Pak. Val turun dulu. “

The second example should be manner, she has themㅡ it is gifted and taught by her mother. No matter how tired or grumpy she is, she still think manner is the most basic human decency to keep. More over ever since Nadia that keeps brainwashing her that her public image is everything that matters. Her heels is making a sound as she walk down through the hotel lobby, a lot of people is eyeing her presence. The waitress is opening the huge door when she about to enter the room, she is familiar with all thisㅡ fine dinings, and all the luxury that it might sound.

She smile in blooms when she enter the room, there is a few people already inside. Her grandparents is sitting in the main seat of the dining table per usual, as a sign that he is the oldest and they are the host of tonight’s dinner. Next to him there’s Adine Lee, her grand mother with her fine silk dress. Next to her is her cousin, Isaiah Leeㅡ and she was informed that there will be a guest, it looks like there’s a complete family of five. There’s a man and woman around her parent’s age, and this beautiful lady sitting in front of Ko Isa. And then this guy with a black suit, and next to himㅡ how surprised she is to see Moreno, her friends back in Senior High School to sit there. She remembered she once met him in one family event but she never find out more about his household because she left to New York by then.

Moreno looks as surprised as she is, he even gasp that makes everyone shift their focus from Valentine to him. Still she keep smiling after. She can see Ko Isa is smiling upon her arrival as well, out of everyone that is present todayㅡ she probably feel the most comfortable with him.

She walked closer to Adine, her grandmother got up from her seat while spreading out her arms to her. She knew what it means, a hug. She has always been close to her grand mother, though not that close close but she’s more familiar with her than with Graham.

“My Valentine, Grandma miss you. “ ㅤ “I miss you so much more, grandma.”

Everyone on the room is looking at the two right now, some smiled to see their interaction. After the hug, her grandmother sit back to her place and she continue her walk to her seat. But theres a pair of eyes which have been following her movement ever since she was present in the room and now shes sitting in front of him, their eyes finally meet. His hazel brown eyes is enough to capture all the light from the chandelier hanging above them.

ISAIAH: A minute smile crossed against Isaiah's lips, feeling warm at the sight he witnessing. Valentine and his grandmother, Adine. After getting her position to sits, his attention shifted to his grandfather, who was in a corner in a close range from Valentine.

"It's an honour for us, The Lee, to eventually have this dinner after so long we are always tied to work. You must have been very occupied but still managed to spend your time to dinner with us. You have my thanks." Graham opened the conversation at the dinner. "Not many from outside earn the opportunity to collaborate with Lee Entertainment. But for Lavigné, Isaiah had always spoken highly to the brand. As always, you are fascinating as ever, after all, Alicia."

The corner of his eyes glanced briefly at the woman who had her head lowered lightly to hides her cheeks redden at the praise given. He believes she deserves it all because of her outstanding performance. However, if only Isaiah, the one who had said the credit, Alicia would have returned the gratitude in denial. But this time, Isaiah could see Alicia working on being polite as possible at Graham. "Thank you." She replied in a gentle tone.

"No, it is you who I should be thanking."

"It is such unfortunate that my father couldn't attend today. He would really love to talk with you." Said the man who happens to be a father of Alicia. "José is my friend, he is just like me when it comes to working, we never tire. Don't worry, I invited you here as a family, and when it comes to family, be at ease. So, loosen up a little." Graham said, along with laughter.

"I hope that this relationship will always be beneficial in the future as well. As you can see, I trusted Isaiah with all my heart. He is made positive and constant improvements to Lee Entertainment. I am confident, in the future, he will remain the same and even better." Isaiah shows a faint smile to those compliments. Even though the words are never meant to motivate him but avail the situation so his company could gain more. It was indeed a great shot.

Noticing that Isaiah was another victim to get compliments from Graham, Alicia responds while her eyes look at him. "I know Isaiah better than any woman he ever met. I have witnessed his impressive record, and Lavigné wouldn't worry about holding on to this partnership. Thank you, Isaiah Lee." The tone of her voice purposely sounded sarcastic.

"It was nothing. No need to thank me all at once or anything." Isaiah, who never fond of losing over Alicia, then have the same playful, sarcastic response in return too.

VALENTINE: Valentine, who is now sitting next to her cousin, Isaiahㅡ can’t help to smile along hearing their conversation, it’s been a minute since they start the dinner but for it to a compliment party.

Valentine is too familiar with all this, this is all she knew, this is all she raised forㅡ she has heard for million times the elderly around her throwing compliments like it’s just a free biscuit, perhaps they did it out of respect, out of formalities, or heaven wonder tooㅡ the real intention behind all that.

Valentine knew that excessive compliments is not Isaiah’s cup of tea as well, though it’s only been a while and they’re not very close with each otherㅡ but she knew Isaiah is someone who worship realism, compliments brings him nowhere. But manner is the necessity of The Lee, he can’t just dodge every compliment he receive. That is primarily the reason why Valentine can’t help to smile, because she knew Isaiah has to deal with all that while swallowing all his dinner for tonight.

On each dinner like this, usually is about business talk or some similar matter. Valentine never really paid a lot of attention for any conversation done before in every dinner because it is mainly on the elder side, it is only a dinner for her.

But it seems that there’s a special case for anything, she seemed to beㅡ alert, and present. Her mind didn’t wander or wish to be anywhere like per usual, she even have to hold the pace of her breathing. Because apparently, she is very well aware that there’s this pair of eyes which have been following her movement ever since she was present in the room. Though he didn’t make it obviousㅡ or it’s just the way he observe his surroundings, he sit right next to Aliciaㅡ the woman Graham has been praising for almost the whole night. Just by looking on how she dress herself, how she sit, how she gracefully receive and speak for herself. Valentine herself can admit, the woman sitting in front of her is remarkably gorgeous and outstanding.

Valentine knew that there will be a guest for today’s dinner, she’s been informed before hand, Ko Isa said that they have been a good friend of our familyㅡ and Valentine knew about the brand Lavigné, she heard it often being mentioned ever since she first signed the contract with The Lee Entertainment. And Alicia is the CEO of the brand.

Out of everyone in this room, beside Moreno that she already knew from St. Gallois. She never heard, nor she knew anything about this guyㅡ he is sitting in between Alicia and Moreno. Each of his movement is either very calm, or very asserting. Moreno whisper to him sometimes in between Graham’s conversation, but she haven’t heard a word from him. Oh how she wish his grandfather, or Ko Isa could start talking to him.

If he’s being honest, this occasion is not his cup of teaㅡ even though he attended numerous business dinner, bouquet, and many other formal event, he still felt a dinner should only be a quick meal back in his office.

So that he can continue what ever work he’s been dealing with, but he’s not someone that is negligent to just bail a dinner invitation. His family worship manners and etiquette after all. More over after he heard his father speak highly of this Lee family, he sure will take the part as a decent son from a family of such great wealth.

Dane Lohr Enrille, is the second born of The Enrille family. The younger brother of Alicia, an older brother to Moreno, the 28 years old heir of The Caspian Enterprises. Speaking of a bloodline, if the tradition said the oldest should take the throneㅡ it should’ve been Alicia that will sit on the throne as the next CEO.

But Alicia made it pretty clear that she’s not interested with the business, instead she has successfully build her own kingdom. That is why her father is satisfied enough with the current plot, it is Dane.

Before this, Alicia assured him that it is only a dinnerㅡ the worst case is that everything will be about her brand new project and her, as the spotlight. She said Dane just need to be present there, and answering a few question if there is.

Never knew he would encounter a figure that amuses him this much only just by looking at her face, he wouldn’t address this for something like seeing his ideal type of a woman since he believe he’s extremely meticulous about this matter.

But he can’t help but look, her gesture, her fair skin, the way her lips curved into a smile. The way she listened to her surroundings. He got the same euphoria like he’s doing and feeling some sort of thing for the first time in his life.

How come he has never seen her before,

how come he didn’t know nor heard about her.

He too, can’t believe that he feels this way. This foreign feeling. As much as he’s suddenly curious about who she is, but since he didn’t have any plan to play with the fire, he distract himself by sipping the cold water to take his sense back.

He’ll probably forget about her after tonight, her sister was right about this, It’s been 30 minutes but the conversation is still all about her, Lavigné and Isaiah. He might have to restrain his curiosity about this Valentine. Perhaps he needs to be satisfied only by the sight of her.

Alicia, who noticed something is going on just by looking on how her younger brother is looking at someone he just met. She never saw him with those eyes. She knew him better than anyone else, there is no way he will start any conversationㅡ so often times, she will.

“So, Valentine is it? Isaiah told me you just got back from Vienna, for recitals?”

“Yes, I’ve performed for a few symphonies and orchestras. “

She was quite taken aback then Alicia suddenly switch the conversation to her, everyone in the table is looking at the two. So did Adine with a loving eyes towards Valentine, Adine is someone who is very fond of classic artsㅡ she contributed to many events related to it, funding or even holding a gallery and recitals in the name of The Lee Foundation, the one Valentine avoided for years. She looks quite excited when Alicia start bringing up about it, on the other hand Graham is now focused with her meal.

“Valentine my dear, I heard you joined a theater production for Broadway? You didn’t inform me much about this one dear. “

Oh great, she thought. At this point Adine will list out every projects Valentine have done, she saw this coming though. Isaiah smiled looking at Valentine who got a little bit flustered for being the center of the attention, perhaps because he knew that sometimes his grandmother want to brag a little bit about how well educated her grand children are when it comes to art.

“I am, Grandma. The Shubert Organization is collaborating with The Julliard School this year, I, am lucky enough to receive the invitation to join the team. “

Adine smiled brightly upon hearing Valentine’s answer, perhaps it satisfy her enough to prove that The Lee Family has it’s own achievement even abroad. Across the room, while she’s still talking with Alicia about her recital and modeling careerㅡ his eyes never left hers ever since she started talking, perhaps it is a normal habit for making eye contacts to whoever is speaking. But at this rate, those looks could kills. Valentine has been someone who is confident with herself, either with public speaking, or just as a self. She can still handle this one,

“Lavigné is launching a new skincare line, we’re still looking for the perfect fit for the Brand Ambassador. Who knows if the spot is yours, Valentine. “

“Oh I love that idea, I’ve often heard Ko Isa speak so highly of Lavigné’s success. “

ISAIAH: Isaiah doesn't like bringing things up that shouldn't be brought up. He was honest about Lavigné's extraordinary performance, and their immeasurable extension deserves praise.

"How about to give a shot for Valentine to fill the spot in Lavigné?" His grandfather said abruptly in the middle of a conversation. It silenced everyone, and also Isaiah. His eyes were shifted towards Alicia, given a sign in which his eyes speak. Their relationship is that closes, to the point he doesn't bother to convey it through words. The signal given is about her opinion of his grandfather's remarks. However, Alicia seemed confused about the situation.

He understands that Graham's decree is too early to determine. Lavigné should consider numerous elements. Besides, this is their first time meeting with Valentine. On another side, Alicia and her family were not familiar with the sudden involvement of Graham in the situation given. Even though, in fact, he always imposes his will on the company. Only Hiram and Isaiah perceive this matter. Breaking the ice, Isaiah began to deliver his thought to his grandfather. "I have to talk with Valentine, first, about the terms and conditions before we jump into the decision." His grandfather seems dissatisfied with the response the man gives, thus Isaiah continued. "We also have to look at the qualities that Lavigné needs, whether it suits Valentine or not."

Again, the answer might displease him. However, whatever Isaiah address turns out to be the right thing to do. He wanted to lessen the unpredictable predicament caused by this. Giving the spot everyone trying to fill to Valentine is comes as easiest to Isaiah. But, the damage that would surface might be requiring prominent exertion.

Actually, even though Valentine followed all the processes, she would make it an ambassador of Lavigné despite being a Lee. Isaiah has been working in this field all his life. Therefore, he had the capability to distinguish whether someone will thrive or not. Valentine is an untapped talented person with several exceptional qualities. He believes she will prosper. Moreover, Alicia has shown her compatibility with Valentine. She earns another point for her winning to the spot.

[aiethflx-blog]

We are always wondering why people are poor.

We are always asking if when will our fate change

We are always asking for luck

We are always questioning why life is so hard

We are always questioning why the world is unfair

We are always complaining on the life we have.

But...

When will we stop relying on luck?

When will we stop questioning?

When will we stop complaining?

In this blog, you'll find the answer to your whys and whens. As you go through to this blog, you'll realize things, so keep on reading.

P O O R

What's your definition of poor?

Is it if people can't buy iphones?

If people can't buy Gucci bags?

If people can't it eat at starbucks?

The problem in us is we label the person poor immediately if they didn't reach our standards. If we ranked ourselves, if they are below us, we think that they are poor but let us remember that things change. Through the years, the value of money is becoming small because of the prices of things around us. If we compare today and before, there's literally a big change when it comes to prices.

Aren't people just want to save? To be thrifty? To be practical because nowadays, when you always grab your money and buy things, you can't live in this world. It is hard to live in everyday life because things are expensive.

But how do we define poor?

They are the people who can't live at the standard set by society.

I said earlier that the problem is we label the person poor immediately if they don't reach our standard. You may think that they are contrast but there is a difference in our own standards to the standards of society because our own standard, as what I've mentioned earlier, if they are just below us, we think that they are poor. In the standard of society, it is the "normal" way of living, basic needs, and money that matters.

There are things that the society considers when knowing if a person is poor or not.

House that is decent and can protect them in some disasters.

Basic needs just like clothes that is pleasant to the eye and not damaged, food that really can satisfy their hunger.

Money that can buy their needs and also some wants.

And if they don't reach those? We call them poor. But as what I've mentioned at the first part, we will answer your whys and whens.

Why people are poor?

As what they say, it's not your fault when you are born poor but it is your fault when you die poor. Poor can have 2 mindsets but first I'll tell you a story.

There are two siblings that their mother dies and their father are always drunk. They are poor. One time their friend, that they played with on their childhood came and visited them after 19 years. He went to the first born in two siblings, his house are filled with many bottle of beers

"Hey, how are you?"

"I'm fine, don't mind me," the first born said.

"What happened to you?" the friend said

"If you have a father like mine, what can you expect for?"the first born said.

He went to the second born child in two siblings. The second born lives in a very good house, he looks really rich. He shaked hands with the friend with a smile on its face.

"Hey, how are you?" the friend said.

"I'm fine" the second born said.

"How can you be this rich?" The friend said

"If you have a father like mine, what can you expect for?"

They have the same answers to their friend but different meaning and that's the reason why people are poor. They have different views in life, the positive and negative. Negative thinkers are mostly to become poor because they don't look on the bright side and never think that they can change. Humans also are lazy, like the first born. Instead of finding jobs for himself, to feed himself, he just sits there, drinking and complaining. Let us remember that don't complain when you don't do things that will make you stop complaining. Complaining won't help nor questioning why the world is unfair.

Let us also look on the other side. It's not just about the people in the community but those who manages the community. We can see that most people are hard working, we can actually be a testimony for them but still they are poor. They work hard, many sweets are being produced by their skin, they have hands with callous but still they remain poor. If they are hard working but the government don't find a way to reach people out, to help them, making them out of poverty won't happen. If government can't find a way to decrease the prices and to produce things like grains without importing or without having a debt, we will remain poor.

Another reason is that people that are more fortunate are being prioritize when it comes to jobs. Unfortunate people do not have the chance to apply in jobs that they want and probably can fit for them. If a person does not finish college or highschool, he/she won't get the job she want even if it fits for his or her skills and ability. Sometimes, even just a janitor, the standard is graduated in college that's why, it is si hard to lift them from poverty.

When will you stop being poor?

When you stop believing in luck.

When you stop complaining.

When you stop questioning.

All those things won't help. Instead of spending your money to lottos, spend it to more valuable things. In spending your money on lottos, you won't realize that you can save all those money you spend. Instead of using those money to apply for jobs, they tend to spend it for lottos. As what I've said earlier that complaining and always questioning won't help unless you do actions.

We all know that men are more muscular than women, that they are likely to find ways to live, they can do things that women sometimes can't do. That's why most of women are poor. If there's still a father in a house, sometimes, they can still eat with decent foods but when there's only a mother in the house, they are more like to become poor because they tend to only seek for help. As we can see on the street, women beggars are most likely to see while men, sells anything to feed them.

We can also see on the street that children are the ones who seek for help, who seek for money because they can't do anything. Their ability and skills won't fit to jobs offered by community because they are still childrens. Their age, also, can't fit for the jobs they want to apply. All they can do is to seek for money to people around them or showing their singing, dancing, drumming skills when they are in a jeep, a Philippine vehicle.

The roots of all those who are hardworking but not being out of poverty is the nation itself. As what I've said, if they are industrious but there is no chance given by the government for them, they will be poor, nation will be poor.

Don't engage yourself in activities that won't benefit good to you. Always study hard and don't givd up on struggles in life that is given on us instead make them as a thing that will make you strong. Don't let anything stop you from what you want and what you achieved. There are people who are poor but lifter up from poverty because of thekr sacrifices and hard work. Always have hop and trust in the Lord.

DECIDE.

ACT.

KEEP ON GOING.