#idk where the last image came from it was from my friend

[ccybermiracle]

Ya'll need to hear me out

[xxkissesforchanniexx]

Best friend Chan who is in love with reader but has a girlfriend?

𝐒𝐨 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭?

Pairing: bestfriend!Chan x reader college au Genre: Angst (i cant write that for shit.), fluff, smut Word Count: 4.5k (lord help me) Warnings: Chan's gf is controlling, gf is a pick me, mentions of cheating (not by chan), mentions of college (younger half of members + chan gf + reader), fade to black sexual moment kinda >.>, nosey ass friends >.>, mentions of ateez members, not proofread, fighting >.> DO NOT DO IT, lowkey (highkey) cringe... UHH Idk what else...

A/N: I have exams soon so >.> i won't be taking requests until like May 😭 uhh I might get out the requests I have but until May I won't be accepting any very sorry >.>

You pursed your lips as your best friend's girlfriend, Chaewol, rubbed herself all over your friend, Chan's, arm.

"Chrissy." She said sweetly. "Can we go now?"

Your other friend, Seungmin stared at her, not even trying to hide the look of disgust on his face.

Minho just blinked slowly.

"Babe, we just got here." Chan sighed.

"I know but the waitress keeps giving me dirty looks." She pouted.

Hyunjin, a man who'd grown to be as close as a brother to you, made a face and leaned in close to you whispering, "Maybe if she hadn't been all over Chan as if the waitress wanted to steal him she wouldn't get dirty looks."

You gave your friend a knowing face.

"It's fine Chan." Seungmin smiled, stirring his drink with his straw, "Just go."

Chan looked at you with an apologetic look.

You shrugged. "We'll just try again some other time."

He smiled. "Alright. See you guys." He stood with Chaewol, who gave you the nastiest look as Chan led her out.

"The waitress wasn't even looking." Seungmin pinched the bridge of his nose.

"She's obviously jealous." Hyunjin huffed. "I would be too if my boyfrie-"

Seungmin elbowed him.

You looked between the two confused. "What?"

"Nothing." They both said.

Minho grabbed. a bunch of tissues from the dispenser in the middle of the table and tried forcing Hyunjin to eat them.

You burst into a fit of laughter as a waiter came over with water to help the spluttering Hyunjin.

Your phone buzzed with a notification from Instagram, you opened it and sucked in a breath at the post. It was of Chan and Chaewol at a bubble tea shop, she was kissing his cheek.

Hyunjin looked at your phone and sighed. "It's fine."

You nodded, "Yeah. Say any of you up for barbecue?"

Seungmin smiled, "Let's go."

It was late now, well past midnight, Chaewol was asleep, and Chan lie awake. He sucked in a breath, rolling onto his side and grabbing his phone, he opened Instagram and squeezed his phone. The picture Chaewol had taken earlier had blown up, "he's so sweet" and "you're so lucky" flooded the comments. He kept scrolling and stopped at a post where you were in a shopping cart and Changbin was pushing you, while Jisung was in a separate cart and Hyunjin struggled to push him. He laughed lightly and paused at a post from 30 minutes ago, that would've been 1am, you were at a table with the other guys. Jeongin was out cold on the table and the rest of them looked drunk stupid except for Minho, probably the driver..

Chan felt his heart clench. When was the last time he'd gone out like that with the rest of you.

He tapped your profile and scrolled through your recent posts, baking with Felix, cooking with Minho, gym day with Han and Changbin, movie night with a friend, a guy, he didn't know..

He stared at the image for a moment before swiping to the next, same guy, laying on his back between your legs, head rested on you stomach, your fingers in his hair, all that was visible, his nose and eyes.

Chan whispered softly, "Who the fuck is that."

Chaewol rolled over, murmuring, "What is it?"

"Nothing." Chan said, "Go back to sleep."

Chan looked through the comments,

Hongjoongisworld 1w Wow, so that's where my snacks went.

HWWAAA 1w Lucky.

former stronk man 1w ;-; why wasn't I invited.

and you tagged Sannie..?

Chan tapped the tag and exhaled slowly at all the pictures of a muscular man with a square jaw and pretty face. So this was Sannie. This was the man doing things he should be, Choi San, who goes to an entirely different school from you.

Chan jumped as suddenly his phone was gone. "Chae-"

"He's hot.." She scrolled through San's profile and hummed. Then her face fell.

Chan leaned over looking at his phone, there you were, phone covering half your face as you took the picture, San behind you, his arm wrapped a little too tight around your waist. Chan took his phone from Chaewol and put it down.

"Go to sleep." He huffed, rolling to face away from her.

Chaewol stared at Chan in the darkness for a long moment before pursing her lips. He's not mad that I called that other guy hot. He's made that Y/N is close to him... And she rolled to face away from Chan, biting her pink nails. What could she do to you?

You were drunk, buzzed, completely inebriated. To the extent Minho had to call someone to pry you off the pole outside of the bar. He'd used your phone and called someone you had labeled as Mr Sannie

Mr Sannie turned out to be someone named Choi San, he was a close friend of yours apparently, and you hugged him poking his face and neck as he half carried, half dragged you to his car.

Minho stared at San for a long time. What is Chan even going to say..

In light of your recent Instagram posts and a long call with Minho, Chan decided to leave Chaewol at home and go hang out with you for the first time in a long while. It was fun, running around being stupid with you. You and Chan were eating ice cream in the park when he asked suddenly.

"Who's San?"

You blinked a bit surprised. "He's a friend of mine."

Chan looked at you before looking back at his ice cream. "Just a friend?"

"Of course." You laughed, it trailed off as you realized he was serious. "Chan, San is just my friend."

Chan looked at you and smiled, "Good."

You didn't exactly know how to respond to that. Good why?

Your phone buzzed and you looked at it, there was a message from Yongbok to the group chat your friend group had.

lixie 3:47pm We're having a party off campus, you senior citizens tryna join in?

He Who Feeds Them Tissues 3:47pm I will if Chan will.

OMG SLAY💅🏻 3:48pm Why are we senior citizens...

Chubby Cheeks 3:48pm Because you've already graduated.

Hangry 3:48pm But we're not senior.

OMG SLAY💅🏻 3:48pm Minho and Chan are.

He Who Feeds Them Tissues 3:47pm You haven't eaten tissues in a while have you Hyunjinnie.

Me 3:49pm You're cooked. 💀

Loaf 3:49pm I'll go. Hyunjin hide.

Channie 3:49pm LOLLL

STAAA 3:49pm OMG GRANDPA LEARNED LINGO

lixie 3:50pm 😧 never thought i'd live to see it.

You giggled and looked at Chan who rolled his eyes.

Your phone buzzed again and Chan peeked over your shoulder, tensing at the sight of Sanniepoo..

Mr Sannie 3:50pm There's a party. Go with me?

Chan looked at you, you hadn't clicked the notification, hesitating.

"Are you going to go?" You asked him.

He bit his lip, "I have to ask Chaewol."

You looked down at your phone and tapped Mr Sannie's chat, typing something. "It's fine." You looked at your phone again and stood, "I have to go meet up with a friend."

Chan opened his mouth to say something, that friend was San, this guy he didn't know, who his own girlfriend thought was hot. You were going to meet up with this guy...

"Bye, Channie." You said before he could get any words out.

And you were gone.

You were sitting in class biting your pen and trying to study in art history before the teacher arrived, when you heard the steps then the whispers. You didn't bother looking up until a pink purse was thrown on your textbook.

You knew that purse, you'd helped Chan pick out that purse for...

"You really think you're funny." Chaewol said. Her group of girls dressed as if this were still high school looked at you with disgusted looks.

You looked up at her. "Am I laughing?"

The chatter in the class died.

"Leave my boyfriend alone." She said.

You raised a brow. "You think I'm messing with Chan?"

"Chris. Doesn't want you."

You stood, "What makes you think I want Chan?"

"Why else would you be all over other guys to get his attention?"

The class gasped.

"I've done a lot of stupid shit, but trying to get a guy's attention is not on that list yet." You said glaring at her.

"You're such a liar!" One of her friends said. "We've seen the pics of you with the guys from KQ Uni."

Chaewol got in your face. "Listen here, Y/N, if you don't leave Chan alone, it's going to be and you."

You sucked in a breath, "Back up."

"If I don't?" She asked.

"How old are you, Chaewol?" You asked irritated.

Chaewol smirked and turned, letting her hair extensions hit you as she grabbed her purse.

You pursed your lips.

You hadn't expected to be greeted by San's car outside of school as you left.

He gave you the corniest smirk as you got in, "I have a surprise for you."

You tilted your head, "What is it?"

He held a out a small box covered in blue velvet and you took it, opening the box you smiled at the sight of a plain black ring band. engraved in silver on the inside was "Dumass #1"

You burst out laughing and put the ring on as San held up his right hand, showing his matching band. You two took several pictures before San started driving.

"Hungry?" he asked.

"You know me so well," you smiled.

You took several more stupid pictures and a few pictures of your food, you were going to post the images but then you remembered what Chaewol had said.

"Why else would you be all over other guys to get his attention?"

You shook your head and pressed post.

"We should go meet the guys, they're out and about today." San hummed.

You nodded, "Okay."

You were laying in bed scrolling when Chan called you, you stared at your phone for a moment before answering. "Helloooo?"

"Uh.."

You heard the shakiness in his voice as he spoke.

"Can you come over? I- Chaewol and I aren't talking." He said sniffing.

"Chan what happened?" You sat up in bed, it wasn't the first time something like this happened...

You were at his house in 20 minutes, staring at your friend as he sniffled and allowed you before hugging you. You patted his back and made him sit as he cried about Chaewol cheating on him... again.

"Am I doing something wrong?" He looked up at you with tears in his eyes.

"Of course not Channie." You smoothed his hair and smiled at him gently. "She's the problem."

He muttered something about not being good at anything and lied down on the couch, resting his head on your lap.

You spent most of the night comforting Chan and relaxed when you got him to go to sleep. You stared at your friend's sleeping face, so content and calm as if in his dreams he'd forget about everything. You smiled slightly and leaned back against the couch falling asleep yourself, sure this would be the last time, positive...

When you woke up Chan wasn't laying on your lap and you assumed he'd gotten up to go do something but as you were about to stand you heard the voices by the door...

"Chris, you know it didn't mean anything. I love you babe." Chaewol sobbed.

"Please don't..." You heard Chan sigh.

"Chan!" She sobbed louder, and you heard her fall to the floor, "Babe it won't happen again! I swear! I love you, please!"

He wouldn't... right?

"Chaewol stand up."

"Not until you forgive me." She sniffed.

You exhaled slowly as Chan told her, "Come back later."

"Chrissy please-"

"I'm serious."

"Fine."

You heard the door close then Chan was back in the living room staring at you.

"Y/N-"

"It's fine. Just enjoy yourself." You pursed your lips and rolled your eyes, before leaving him standing there.

Chan's mouth was half open he was going to say something, he willed the words out. But a small, "Thanks for coming over." Left his lips instead and was met with the door slamming.

Chan kissed Chaewol and muttered, "You did so good for me."

Chaewol lay there on the bed trying to catch her breath, after cleaning up, Chan got into bed and Chaewol was already out cold. He rubbed her head gently, then he got a text from Changbin.

Baby Changbin 7:59pm Did you see what Y/N posted?

Chan opened instagram, there was a bunch of posts with you and a bunch of guys he didn't know, there was more with that Choi San... and he scrolled to this afternoon, food, you two being stupid, then.. a picture of your hand and someone else's, someone Chan could assume was San, wearing matching rings.

Chan bit his lip and looked at his jewelry drawer. He'd stopped wearing the necklace that matched yours because Chaewol thought it was "intrusive" and "a physical show of emotional cheating".

That left one thing...

"Baby." Chan shook Chaewol gently.

"Huh?" She groaned.

"There's a party tomorrow," He muttered.

"I know." She opened her eyes a little.

"Can we go?"

"Yeah whatever, let me sleep..."

Chan lie back and stared at the pictures of you and San.

He opened his chat with Changbin.

Me 8:02pm He goes to KQ Uni?

Baby Changbin 8:02pm They all do

Me 8:03pm We're going to that party.

The day of the party Chan pulled up in front of the old college he once attended, where you and Chaewol currently went. He had come on Chaewol's request, so he could take her to buy a new outfit for the party.

He saw you and Jisung and was about to get out of his car to go talk to you but another car pulled up. Chan froze as he got out of the driver's seat and hugged you then began counting on his fingers while making an exaggerated face. Jisung cackled. You rolled your eyes and pushed San's head, he faked a hurt expression and opened the front passenger side door for you.

Chan squeezed the wheel and this time got out of the his car, he would've approached but the sound of a squeal made him look away from you, Chaewol and her friends came over and she threw herself on him.

She looked in your direction, then made a face, "That's the guy from KQ Uni isn't it?"

Chan didn't answer, eyes glued on the way you and San went back and forth before you finally got into the car and Jisung got in the back seat.

Chaewol shook him slightly. "Chris?"

Chan's eyes met San's as he closed the door. All the man did was smile before getting into his car and driving away taking you with him.

Chaewol squeezed Chan's arm. "Is something wrong?"

"Not at all." Chan lied, "Let's go, hm? Gotta make you look even more beautiful."

Chan pulled up to the party with Chaewol and her friends. He got out and opened the door for Chaewol, who quickly scampered to join her other friends. Chan shook his head and started looking around for his friends, then he saw Minho, there was a group of guys with him, Chan could only recognize San.

He approached and San smiled at him, Minho patted Chan on the shoulder and introduced him to the rest of the men. "This is my good friend Chan. Channie, this is San, Seonghwa and Yunho."

Chan nodded and smiled, "Have you seen Y/n?"

"Oh, she ran off with Seungmin somewhere." Minho said. "Probably to get drinks."

"Oh, okay."

San raised a brow at Chan, "You know Y/N?"

"She's my friend from high school." Chan said.

Seonghwa looked between the two sensing the tension and laughed nervously, "I'm going to go.. get us some drinks? Yunho come with me." Seonghwa grabbed Yunho and dragged him away.

MInho stared at the two in shock, "Hey, hey, hey. It's a party, don't look so aggressive.."

San nodded, "Of course."

A moment later, you and Seungmin came bouncing back giggling like little children. Seungmin grabbed Minho, "Hyunjin wants to dance with you." And he dragged him away.

Chan smiled at you. You gave him a hug and poked his nose, "Didn't think you'd make it."

"I'm here." Chan shrugged.

San's mouth fell open dramatically and he made a face at you. "Am I invisible???"

You gave him a side eye. "I saw you earlier."

San clutched his chest, "So cruel..." he faked tears then the two of you started laughing.

Chan felt a tug on his arm, he looked at Chaewol.

"Oh," She looked at you and San.

San looked past you at Chaewol and you turned, pursing your lips ina. tight smile.

"Hi," Chaewol smiled at you and then looked at San, "I'm Chaewol."

"San," He nodded before looking right at Chan as if asking with his eyes So you have a girlfriend... San smiled at you and grabbed you, "Y/N we should dance."

Chan was about to say something but Chaewol pulled him away, "Babe we should go get some drinks."

Chan wanted to pull away he wanted to say no but then.

"Christopher."

He looked at Chaewol and smiled, "Ok."

As the party neared its end, Chan didn't know where Chaewol was, but he was too drunk to wonder. Minho had found him half passed out on the couch and helped him up. Minho helped Chan walk and eventually found you, talking to San's friend Seonghwa.

"He's too buzzed yo drive and Chaewol is no where to be seen." Minho said before carefully passing Chan's weight to you.

You stumbled slightly and somehow managed to support him. Seonghwa helped you before you fell over, you carried Chan to Seonghwa's car and tossed him in the back seat.

Seonghwa drove you to Chan's house and parked before asking, "Are you okay to carry him in alone?"

"Of course, I've got him." You laughed, and woke up a half asleep Chan in the backseat before helping him walk to his front door and convincing him after a bit of bickering to open the door. he trudged into the house and flopped face first onto the couch.

You laughed and he looked at you.

"Are you going?" he asked quietly.

You stopped laughing and nodded.

"Why...?"

"Because I have to go home, Chaewol wouldn't like seeing me here." You said.

Chan sat up and looked at you, "Please don't go."

You stared at him, "Chan-"

Before you could protest he hugged your waist and buried his face in your belly. "Please.

You stood between staring down into his eyes as he looked up at you. "I can't... Chaewol might get angry."

Chan's grip on your relaxed for a brief second. Then it tightened again and he whispered, "I don't care... Please... Stay. I need you to stay."

"You're drunk." You shook your head and started pry yourself away from Chan but he held you tighter.

"Would you be mad at me if I told you I liked you?" He muttered.

"No." You said quietly. "I'd ask you why."

"And if I said I love you?"

You stared at Chan. "You're not thinking straight." You started to pull away but he squeezed you for a moment.

"I don't need to think." He stood up and smiled gently at you, "It feels better if I'm with you." He hugged you completely against him and rested his head on your shoulder.

"Chan I-"

"Don't push me away right now... I might cry if you do." He breathed.

You held him as his body relaxed against yours. And the door opened.

You weren't sure what happened between the door opening and where you were now. What you did know was that you were going to beat the crap out of the person pulling your hair.

Chaewol pulled your hair and screamed at you as her friend tried pulling her back. It was a mess of punches and scratches and hair-pulling. "Boyfriend stealing, home-wrecking BITCH!" Chaewol screamed as she pulled your hair.

"You're the one who can't keep your legs closed!" You shouted, swinging at her.

"Don't come back here! Keep your hands off Chris!" She shouted as Chan pulled you off her and she kicked at you still gripping your hair.

You grasped on her hair as well and pulled out her hair extensions. "You fucked your relationship over yourself! You cheater! You ugly, ungrateful- OOOH!" You threw her extensions in her face as Chan picked you up around the waist and carried you out the door.

"Christopher! Get back here! Bring her back right now!" Chaewol shouted as her friend tried calming her down.

You were trying to get away from Chan as he dumped you on the ground and held you so you wouldn't run back to keep fighting.

"Chan are you even living?!" You shouted. "Howw do you let her treat you like that! It's your house, your money, your LIFE!" You pulled away from him and started walking away.

He grabbed your hand and pulled you back hugging you tightly. "Please." he muttered. "I love you."

You stared blankly for a moment. "Huh?"

"I need you." He pulled back and looked at you.

"You're probably just in shock and drunk."

He shook his head slowly, "I'm tired. I'm tired of fighting and screaming and everything.." He leaned down and pressed his forehead against yours. "Please."

And you didn't stop him as he kissed you.

Chaewol was faking tears the following monday in class and everyone was running to her to console her. Except you.

"Chaewol don't cry." Someone said rubbing her shoulder. "What happened?"

"I went home after the p-party. And Ch-Chan and Y/N were all over each other," She sobbed.

The whole class shot you dirty looks, you kept about your business staring at your text book.

"A-And then..." She snuffed. "We had a fight and Chan carried her out." She sobbed dramatically.

You made no move of any kind when some girls came up to you asking if it was true.

"IT GETS WORSE!" Chaewol shrieked. "THAT HOMEWRECKER KISSED HIM OUTSIDE TOO!"

You closed your textbook and got up from your seat, going to leave. As you stepped out of the building Chaewol's friends flocked behind you.

What you hadn't anticipated to see outside was Chan, he leaned against his car looking at his phone. Looking up at the sight of you and the other girls.

"Where's Chaewol?" he asked.

"She's inside crying over your sorry ass." One of her friends spat.

Chan opened his car and pulled out three pink suitcases and set it on the side walk. "Tell her to come get her stuff. If I missed anything she can come get it herself."

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Chaewol's voice came from the front entrance and you turned to see her running out and down the steps where she grabbed Chan. "Chris! Chrissy! Baby! Honey!"

Chan pulled his hand away from hers.

"WHY?!" She screamed, other students were looking through class windows or from where they were walking.

"I'm tired. I'm so tired." Chan said simply and grabbed your hand.

You gasped as he put you in the car. "Chan-" You started as Chaewol tried to open your door.

"Let them try." He said locking the doors and looking at you. "I want to talk to you."

When you were a sophmore in high school and Chan was a senior, you became fast friends. Not that Chan wanted to be your friend, really, he had been hoping to get your number and possible convince you to date him. But he'd failed miserably as Minho told him countless times before.

You'd have been lying if you had said you weren't into him, he was sweet and funny and gorgeous. But when he went to JYPU, he met a girl from another school, she was sweet at first, but when they started dating things didn't work out well. At least for Chan. The first time he'd called you crying saying that he and Chaewol had fought you thought it was normal. But the more it happened, the less normal it seemed to you...

And then he didn't speak to you for months on end... because Chaewol said he couldn't.... Becuase Chaewol didn't trust you.

And when she'd cheated and you suggested breaking up, it wasn't even a day before he'd forgiven her. And you couldn't help but wonder why. Why you were in this car staring at your hands? Why you let him drag you out? Why you let him kiss you?

Chan whispered quietly. "I talked to San."

You looked at him.

"I'm sorry."

"It's not you fau-"

"It is." He rested his head on the steering wheel. "I let Chaewol take over my life, and every time she lied and betrayed and and promised it wouldn't happen again it did... and I let it happen." he sat up and turned to you. "I'm sorry."

You sucked in my breath. "You shouldn't apologize. You couldn't have known better.."

"But I did know better." He looked at you. "I've known better- No, I knew you were better. I just.. I was scared you didn't want me back. Let me tell you when I'm sober. While you'll listen.."

"Channie." You stared at him.

He leaned in. "Can I.." he said quietly.

You nodded slowly and Chan leaned into you, his soft breath against your lips before he kissed you gently. He pulled away and whispered. "I love you."

You looked into his eyes. "I love you too..."

Your phone buzzed in your bag for god knows what time. Chan's lips were on your neck, you whined as he sucked a dark mark to the skin.

You moaned as he rutted against you. Rubbing his tented crotch against your clothed pussy. He pressed his thumb to your lip, "Suck." He muttered.

You opened your mouth and sucked on his thumb obediently. He groaned and pulled your shirt over your head. Chan kissed down your chest and removed your bra before moving lower and pulling off your pants. He kissed your thighs and smiled at the wet spot on your pantie. "This for me?"

He pulled your pantie off and licked a big strip of your pussy and moaned into you. You grabbed his hair.

"This is mine. You hear?" He looked up at you, coffee colored eyes dark and pupils blown wide. "This pussy is mine."

You whimpered and nodded.

"Good girl." He whispered before shoving his tongue into you.

You squealed.

"And the rest was..." You smiled to yourself blushing deeply.

"So then what?" Seonghwa asked as he sipped his coffee.

"You horny little-." San slapped him.

You rolled your eyes and smiled as your phone buzzed with a message from Chan.

Channie🥰 2:14pm I wanna take you out, text me when you get home.

Tags

@juskz

[yandere-kokeshi]

yandere ghost yandere ghost yandere ghost yandere ghost yandere ghost yandere ghost yandere ghost yandere ghost yandere ghost

— His Prey

Pairing: yandere childhood friend Simon x gn reader

Warnings: yandere behavior, slight spoilers for the comics; if you haven’t read it yet, I’d highly recommend reading it - stalking, implied family abuse, kidnapping(?), mentions of alcohol, hinting that the reader is slightly older, and smut.

Smut tags: dubcon, public sex(?), size kink, creampie (wrap it before you tap it!!), messy aftercare(?), and kidnapping?

A/N: I hope you enjoy this. This took so long and this is probably my favorite one. But I may take a break from smut, idk 🤷‍♂️

GIF IS NOT MINE || BELONGS TO @/sgt-gaz

You had been missing for years. Decades that seemed to last for millions for Ghost. As a kid, he’d imagine marriage and having kids - something that every kid admires at least once. 

It’s true, he did love you, you always took care of him and helped clean him up after every time he had himself a fuck up. Be it romance problems, money problems, or even family problems. You always struck out your head for him. So, why wouldn’t he look for you?

Your family gave up on you, for reasons that are now beyond him. For reasons that disgusted and angered him. 

On his fair share, he could understand what you had gone through. His family was also a mess, specifically his father - always screaming at anyone, especially at you whenever you came to visit. It was a mess. Just like he was and still is. 

But, when he got the news that you ran away; your loyal image distorted and tainted by your family’s grief and anger.

He was angry. He remembers jumping over fences, ignoring the pouring rain, and running to your home - not believing the words of his father, but when he knocked frantically, your drunken father answering with slurring words and the smell of cigarettes strong, he knew you had left.

Asking where you had gone, all your father did was shrug his shoulders. Talking down to you as a ‘pent-up bitch who deserved to leave’.

Those few nights in jail weren’t fun. He can still feel the blood on his knuckles. The bruises cracked his skin and made them bleed. To Simon, he was a lucky bastard to even still breathe. 

It hurts to be left behind, but Simon soon understood. For your own safety and happiness, you had to escape. He knew in his heart and soul that he’d find you again sooner or later. 

And when he did, he’d feel your hands hug him tightly. Hear that pretty voice of yours that was addicting to listen to, even if he didn’t know what you were talking about. Those times in your garage, listening to heavy rock and dancing to the embarrassing beats as you pulled him into a messy kiss. 

Those memories were precious to him. 

You two went your own ways. But now… he grasps the nice times he had with you. Comforting and safe times with you. The ones where he could run to your home - knocking on your window at midnight, covered in sweat from how fast he ran. Your embrace was the best for him.

Tightening his hold on the film in his hands, the one where you two are hugging from his graduation, days before you had left. He sighed; inhaling through his tight teeth, he jumped out of his truck and started walking towards the diner he knew so much about. 

You are his mission, for now, and until he dies. 

Ghost had gathered enough information about your cold trail to find you. Found a friendly woman on the way, one that was quite nice and oblivious to the dangers - a nice and gentle lady who had offered to give him the location where she had last seen you a few weeks ago. 

A sad but comforting word of, love goes a long way. I hope you find them. 

Thudding his worn boots against the pavement, he admired the morbidly dead-beat town; a few people passing by him, eyes staring at him as if he was an alien. But, what was weirder was that no kids were running around - no music or loud beeping of cars could be heard. 

Only the occasional noises of crickets and wind blowing against the covering of his hoodie. It was uncomfortable. 

Approaching the recognizable diner, the lights were flickering. The run-down neon lights of spotted letters buzzed ever so slightly, the humming could be easily mistaken as a wasp nest. The letters were barely hanging on, only having support from the strings above the window; swinging left to right as if it was a lullaby.  

The D and R had shut down completely, making the rest of entire letters seem bigger, a series of flickering flashes that made it as though threatening. 

But threatening didn‘t scare him. Not anymore at least. It was something he was used to it.

Coming inside, the loud but nostalgic ding! Was nice to hear. His eyes follow the insides of the booth, looking at the familiar retro commercials playing on the TVs and people munching on the greasy food, chugging cheap beer down their throats, and jazzed music playing in the background. 

The heavy smell of oily french fries and vanilla milkshakes burned into his nose. A familiar chase of reminiscent, made him shut his eyes as he sighed, stupidly.

What if you weren’t here? What if… all of this was a dream and he was still a beat-up kid? It was something he didn’t wanna think about, but with everything that’s happened - his family, his home, his mind a fucked up place; everything was possible.

Taking a deep but swift sigh, he reopened them, revealing a familiar face on the opposite side of the counter. It didn’t even take a second for him to know who it was. 

It’s you. Look at you…

Walking about, doing your job as you unknowingly noticed the man in a giant hoodie. He watched you walk from table to table - seeing your little notepad and the recognizable clicky pen you’ve somehow kept. The black and orange lines on it have yet faded. Didn’t he give you that in high school? 

You’ve… grown. Still cute as a darlin’. Addicting as ever. 

He saw you smile at your coworker - their voice going into the abyss of his mind. Your smile is so pretty. It still is. Your laugh too. It was way too genuine for this crappy and unsafe place; a place you shouldn’t even call home.

It gave him the chills. The way your voice was nothing but a gift. Such a gentle smile and laugh. Just like in the old times.

The memories hit him like a train. The photos and slow moments of spending most of the summer with you, running away from old men who were yelling at you for stealing candies at 7/11 - you were facetious and flirty, somehow always grabbing his hands, pulling him along to your mischievous plans. Then, it was fun. 

After all, in his mind, you were still the gorgeous partner he so loved. A love grew into need. A need that turned into years of searching and trying to find you again. 

But looking at you now, Ghost betted a few hundred bucks - that you’d look really nice with his tattooed arm around your throat - those lips promising to be good and treat him well. 

You always tasted amazing. Even whilst sweating or crying. 

Tonight, you were exactly what he was looking for: his soulmate. Sure, he didn’t believe in that kind of stuff, but he knew you were meant for him. You were everything he could ask for. 

Besides, with that adorable smile of yours, you were practically begging to be manhandled and thrust up against the brick walls behind the diner. For now, all he had to do was wait till you were off. And again, you were his mission after all. And he takes them very seriously. 

“Night, Rebecca!” You yelled, shutting the door behind you as you started walking towards your apartment. Pulling your jacket more into your figure, you cursed out loud. Jeez, did today have to be more exhausting? 

Maybe I could stop at the wine shop. It is Friday after all, you thought. As you continued to walk down the similar path to your apartment, you never noticed the large figure following right behind you. 

Though, you were always a bit naïve. Somethin’ that drew Simon in like a rope around a horse.

Suddenly, whilst you were walking, your phone slipped out of your pocket. The brutal hit of your phone screen smacking onto the concrete made you cringe. Your heart banged out of your chest as you immediately let out a wild yelp.

“Shit!” You blurted out, crouching down to pick it up. Though, as you went down, there was a rush of wind and suddenly you were hoisted by hands grabbing you by the waist. You screamed, trying to kick and hit whatever was behind you, whilst trying your best to ignore the anxiety spiraling in your chest and down your body.

The back of your head smacked against the stone of the wall. But before you could react, a hand was placed over your mouth as the stench of incense and light booze crawled into your nostrils; letting you take in the large yet dark figure in front of you which was leveled with the sight of a black hoodie and muscular arms. 

“Shh,” a gritty voice growled in your ear. “I won’t hurt you.”

Is this where you’re gonna die? Where the Fox News makes a case for your murder in cold blood?

It was then that you noticed the nature of the voice, the familiar smell of comfort waving in. Home. It smelled like home. 

Preparing yourself, you peeked up at the tall and masked man, barely reassuring yourself as the adrenaline of fright from being thrown into a dark alleyway and being held against the bricked wall was starting to sit in.

Though connecting eyes with the man, you released a gasp. Looking into those recognizable brown eyes you could remember anywhere.  

“Simon?”

It’s his eyes. Black holes. No stars. The face paint around his eyes burned into them like ash.

He could feel his heartbeat in his hands, a sudden reminder of his given name, sitting nearly forgotten at his hidden identity; whipped away with ‘Ghost’ and ‘The most Brutal Soldier’. 

Simon was no longer Simon. He was Ghost. A hulking behemoth of a man. Nothing but pumped full of adrenaline, a dexterity for killing. A cover-up from his messed up, a shit show of the past. 

“Holy shit…”

Your gaze made his heart ache. Watching how tears swelled up into them, how blown wide they were. All he wanted was to wipe those away and kiss them better. Comfort you the times you did to him when he’d come to you crying - feeling your small hands wrap around him and kiss his neck affectionately.

“I thought… your family and you–”

Your hands were shaking - fists clenching and unclenching as his hoodie near his chest. Your voice was shaking, almost like a doe-eyed deer trying to escape its predator; thriving at its very last breath as it tried to talk. But, nothing was coming out. All that was heard were hiccups and the slight pounder of cars driving by.

You sniffled, eyes flashing. The sweet look of concern on your adorable face. 

His hand went down, pulling away at his gloves before wiping your tears as more came down. Your hands, always delicate and soft, ascended to hover above his face, barely touching his skulled balaclava. He could feel his throat tighten - like a noose was secured around it. Threatening to yang the weapon if he dared to speak.

“Can… I pull it down?”

You expected a harsh no. A quiet negative answer. You could tell he was wearing it for a reason. Hiding something that he didn’t want you or anyone else to see. It squeezed your heart - uncertainty piling into your stomach. 

Though, when his fingers curled around the bottom of the balaclava - pulling up and off the mask, your throat went dry.

So much has changed since you were kids, the Simon you once knew: the soft chubbed cheek and rounded smile was now scarred. Everything on his face was bumped, unmetrical. Dry and harsh. Something you’d never expect from your Simon. 

“H-how…” You asked, reaching him to touch his warm cheek - your fingers grazing over his littered cheek of scars. He almost didn’t look like the Simon you knew years ago. His eyes and hair stayed the same. But the rest of him didn’t. The tattoos, his demeanor, the scars, the littered marks all over his body and hands that were once soft and hot to touch. Instead of being the scrawny kid he once was, he was now… big and intimidating. 

“I know. Not the proudest moment to introduce again,” He chuckled, his giant hands grabbing yours and tightening his hold. He pulled them up to his lips, taking a moment to look into your eyes before kissing your knuckles.

“I won’t let anything hurt ya’ anymore, okay?” He stated, his hand letting go of yours and wrapping them around the curves of your hips, pulling you closer towards him as he pushed his face into your hair, inhaling a sharp sigh. 

“Simon. How did you…?” You ushered out, laying your forehead on his chest as you waited for his answer.  Simon — took an agonizingly long minute to reply, his hands tightening around your hips as you wrapped your arms around his lower back, feeling more tears rolling down your face. 

“It’s a long story, doll.” He stated, digging his face deeper into your hair as you felt your stomach twist and turn into butterflies. 

You detach yourself from his chest, looking up at him as your lips quivered. “I- don’t understand Simon. How are you…?”

“How what, sweetheart?” He looked down at you, his hand going up to your chin, quickly wiping the tears that fell as he patiently waited for your answer. 

“Your father- he…”

Suddenly, Simon growled out. His grip on your hips tightened, making you grimace loudly. “Don’t. He doesn’t matter. What… happened years ago doesn’t matter right now.”

“I didn’t mean-”

“Shh- it’s fine. Jus’... You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.” He danced his fingers up your chest, making their way to your sternum. Slowly he unbuttoned your shirt, making sure to take his time as his lips attached to your neck, leaving a few marks that he intends to stay. 

“S-imon,” Your words were a little above a whisper, peppered with high-pitched gasps that seemed to be enjoyed by the man in front of you; his lips kissing your ear, jaw, and neck. Slowly making his way down to your stomach.

“I know. Me too,” He chuckled, fully unbuttoning your shirt, and pulling it off as it fell onto the floor. “Been waitin’ the right time, for you to become mine again. I promise I won’t be too mean.” 

A whine blanked your mind, feeling his hands knead at your soft skin, cupping your arse under his fingers as he dropped your pants onto the floor. “Fuck, n-not here please.” Though, Simon’s answer was a harsh one as you felt something hard poking you on your thigh.

“It’s fine. I’ll be fast then we can leave, yah’?” His chest touched yours, and with his strong hands, he gripped your thighs and hiked you up onto his hips, knocking your knees together which prompted you to wrap and tighten your legs around his waist. 

Your hands fisted his hoodie on his shoulder, “What are you—!” 

A moan was let out as you felt his fingers dip beneath your briefs, teasing your core as you cried out; feeling him hit that spot that made your knees go weak. “Oh gosh-” you gasped.

Simon drew his face closer to yours and kissed you. The taste of alcohol and tangy smoke blended in with your breath as he kissed you so sweet that you never wanted it to end - your moan being muffled as his tongue explored your cave. 

Your fingers traveled from his shoulders up to the back of his head, grabbing a fistful of his hair as you two hungrily fought for a truce; fighting the urge to smile as he groaned from your sly fingers. 

Finally, you two separated for air - heaving deeply as you two looked into each other’s eyes. Suddenly, you felt his fingers push up inside you in a twirling motion. You groaned and writhed beneath him, and as you did, your thigh pushed against his groin.

His harsh breath that blew onto you had goosebumps rise across your skin.

“I need you.” he rasped. 

You reached your hand down to slide your hand inside his pants to grip his erect cock. You swallow the words that wanted to come out, feeling how your fingers barely touch around the width of him. Jesus, how could anyone have this size? 

You rub your thumb over the tip. He’s leaking pre-cum and when your nails grazed his sensitive head, he shivered. By the time you had removed your fingers, bringing them up to your lips, his hands were already finishing unbuttoning his belt and undoing his zipper; freeing his cock.

He was thick, with a bulbous base. He had building veins. Some on the underlining of his cock, outlining the leaking pre-come, rolling down the length of his cock. He also had a happy trail, a sagittal one that was very attractive. 

You ached to feel him inside you, but when you reached down, he shook his head. “Let me taste ya’ first.”

Taking a minute, you nodded, and he took your hips in both of his giant hands; adjusting your position up onto his shoulders, letting your legs hang off them. He then lowered his mouth to your body, kissing and nipping down to your V-line, then worked his tongue and teeth to pull down your undergarment as he came to the sensitive skin where your thigh met your pelvis. 

He kissed you there sweetly, breathing in your tainted-sweat skin and scent. Infuriatingly ignoring where you wanted to be touched most. 

He groans out your name. Spilling it out like a love spell.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he started to work his tongue over and around you. Circling, sucking, caressing. Taking in your taste like a wolf with its mate.

At first, Simon only kept his left hand on your thigh, watching you unravel from his mouth — bucking upwards into his mouth, seeing you moan out as he growled against you, sending vibrations to your core. His nails dug deeply into your thighs, adding a counterpoint to the intense sensations of his tongue and lips as he made sure you whined out.

It took you a pretty short time before he brought you breathless, pushing you over to the edge with his tongue and hands. The rough fingers of his, the depth of penetration of his tongue, and the wet noises made you go boneless. 

Yet, he still didn’t move the heat of his mouth from your hole while you came, admiring how your body clung to the concrete wall and his head for support as your shouts echoed throughout the alleyway. He cleaned you more with his tongue — relishing the taste of you.

“Fucking hell.” he grunts.

He departed himself from the mess he had caused - giving you a quick peck before he hiked you back onto his hips, moving your legs around his lower back as he lowered his slick cock between your parted legs, breathing hard.

“I need you, darlin’,” He growled in your ear.

You panted, nodding slowly as your vision was barely picking up - already overstimulated from how long it has been since anyone else has made you cum quite violently. 

His breath was hot. Breathing directly down to your collarbone as he nudged the hot tip of his cock against your entrance. He’s too big, his blunt head snags against your entrance. You breathe through your nose, brow furrowing as you tighten your eyes closed. 

“Jesus Christ,” He hissed as he bucks, clearly impatient, needing more as he feels the clutch of your sex. 

“Easy.. please,” You try, feeling him draw your forehead against his, the sweaty skin rubbing against each other as you two share the love you two once shared - an act of surface, awaiting till it boils over.

“Fuck,” he mutters in your ear. 

You cling to him, desperate and a little dizzy. He’s so big and you’re so full, packed to the very brim as his cock drags against your sensitive walls; you feel his nose press into your cheek, his mouth sliding against your jaw as he grinds into you.

“Ss’good,” he utters quietly, “Fuck, I love ya’ so much.”

You cried out in pleasure - clenching down at his shoulders as you bit your finger. His hips and cock punching against the furthest part of your core. He releases a deep groan of pleasure at your sheer tightness.

“More!” You rasped out, grabbing his cheek and kissing him. He parted his lips and let your tongue taste his mouth. You tasted yourself - but you didn’t mind. All you cared about was Simon. Your Simon. 

He plants his feet deeper into the concrete, beginning to really fuck you. Positioning his hips and slamming up inside you until the sound of only your soaked hole swallowing him repeatedly along with slapping skin bouncing off the walls.

It’s overwhelming. The heavy smell of rain. The smell of sex and the sounds of raspy groans. Squelchy noises of your hole being brutally hit as your thighs are turning raw. It’s rasp and chafe. But you were enjoying it. Enjoying every bit of it.  

“Fuckin’ hell,” he hushed out, his hips snapping more. “Feels so good.”

He began to move deeper, harder, sharper. You clutched at his giant arms, your legs tightening around his waist as his hips cracked more. You felt his muscles tighten, a slight warning of him crashing down to his peak. 

Your toes curled. Entwining up with the sensations spreading all over your body, pounding at your sensitive ears. You could hear everything. Feel everything. Taste everything. 

He’s reclaiming you. His hips fully abusing your hips and thighs. His groans and tightened jaw were a sight to see. His eyes shut closed as his body tightened up. 

“Come for me.” he says, “I know you need to, love.” 

Your eyes rolled in the back of your head. Yet another pleasure crash came over you, consuming you again, and at that, with a bellow that shook to your very core, your orgasm took you by surprise with a scream.

His voice lowers down. His hips sped up even more as your toes curled and head rolled back - eyes seeing white. Your nails dug into his back. 

You felt Simon stiffen. The warmth of his spent filling you. His hips spasmed and jerked, his jaw clenching with a long groan, his eyes screwed shut as you felt hot liquid rush inside you, stuffing you full. Even as he pressed his hips tightly against yours, still grinding at the pleasure, you were a moaning mess. 

When he finished, he let out a soft sigh. Still sitting inside you, he prepped kisses all over your neck, sliding his tongue with your sweaty skin and dug his nose into it. You felt him mumble some words, but you paid no attention. 

Slowly pulling back, making sure to not overwhelm you, he let you back on the ground. Simon had his hands on your waist, ensuring you were still there - almost as if he loosened his grip, even by a grain of salt, you’d disappear. 

“That was…” You went to say something, but with dopamine and adrenaline still coursing through your veins, your brain was left blank - possibly melting. 

Simon chuckled, leaning over to kiss your forehead before looking you directly in the eye. “You okay?” 

You nodded, “Jus’ tired and cold.”

He nodded, adjusting his pants and getting dressed. Belting his pants back up before crouching down to grab your clothes that were thrown on the floor. Standing back up, he handed them to you.

“You should get dressed,” He said. 

“Not in the mood to stain my clothes,” You laughed, running your fingertips over your collarbone that was stained with sweat. Simon looked down between your legs, before looking behind you as you felt your cheeks heat up. 

“You need to get dressed.” He grabbed the bottom of his hoodie, pulling it off of him as he prompted you to raise your arms. Nonetheless, Simon’s smell gave you an undying amount of comfort. Shoving your arms through the sleeves, he helped you get your head through the top hole before adjusting the bottom of the fabric, making sure it covered you whole. 

And that it did. You marvel at how large the damn hoodie is, your fingertips barely peeking at the ends of the sleeves and the end of the hoodie covering most of your thighs. It was astonishing.

“Hey, where’s my—!” Before you could finish the question about your phone, you yelped - feeling yourself get picked off the ground. You were picked up by Ghost, being rested in his arms as he held you with such care. Making sure you were comfortable before resting your head on his chest. 

You could feel his heart thumping - picking a beat at the sound of drums. Like tapping your fingers at your desk as you studied a book scenario. It was comforting.  

“Why– where are we going?” You asked, looking up at him with a face of confusion as he adjusted his mask; his eyes peering down at you from the balaclava.  

“M’ taking you home.” He stated, his hands curling more around your body. 

You blinked at him, surprised. 

“Home? You don’t even know where my apartment is. How would you—?”

“—You’re gonna stay with me,” he clarifies, ducking his head as the both of you started walking away from the alleyway. Slight embarrassment rises in your cheeks as you realized you just fucked in an alleyway. Not the first time with him.

You huffed out an annoyed sigh, you replied with a quick answer, “That’s not what I meant. Where are we going?”

There was only silence after that, and you had worried that maybe you pushed too far. Possibly angered him. After calling his name twice and no answer coming forward, you decided to quit asking. 

You slid your arms around his neck, paying no attention to your surroundings. Unintentionally, you dug your face into his shoulder, taking a deep inhale before you listened to the wind; admiring how quiet it was.

Surely, you could see a smug smirk trail against Simon’s face - but you paid no attention. You were tired. Exhausted at best.

Suddenly, you heard a car; a truck gets unlocked from behind you. You were prompted to look, but when you got sight of the black Chevy truck, suddenly the door being opened by Simon and you being placed in the passenger seat beside the driver, you slumped into the seat.

You waited for him to climb in. Hearing the backdoor to your left open and shut loudly before you heard him get in. He shuffled in his seat, reaching over to buckle in his seatbelt before looking in your direction.

“Here.”

You looked at his hand, a huge white wool blanket being handed to you. You grabbed it, the fabric practically melting into your fingers. It was so soft. And smelled like him too.

You heard Simon chuckle at your reaction before starting up the truck, turning down the radio to ensure you were comfortable. He put on the heaters - readjusting the way of direction to blow so it could puff directly at you.

“Tomorrow, we’ll stop and get your stuff. From now on, you’ll stay with me.”

You nodded. Not saying anything. But when you tucked into the blanket around your form, making sure it covered your shoulders and legs, you felt his hand move over, gripping your thigh as he squeezed three times; his way of saying, ‘I love you’. 

It made you smile. Turning your sight over to look into the side mirror, you watched as your town got further away. The lights turned into small gusts of balls as you watched the road become thinner and thinner. Before turning into nothing but a small pan of memories. 

You lay there a long time, just listening to the sound of the music and the occasional blinking of the car to signal changing lanes. It was until you found yourself slipping into sleep right after a few minutes. Turned out you’d missed the contact as much as he had. It was probably for the best, that you stayed with him for a while. 

Not that he’d let you go.

—

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[shehungthemoon]

Bucktommy Fic prompts: first vacation or snowy cabin vibes

first 118 bbq

Buck rescues a kitten from a tree and keeps it #catdads

Buck telling Tommy he was a sperm donor with zero context like ‘oh yeah biologically I have a kid’ and walking off leaving Tommy like ???

First Christmas together

Idk if it’s your vibe but something relating to the ring cutter?

Babysitting jee

Tommy realising ‘random facts with Buck’ is a thing

Flying lessons

Sorry I have a lot of thoughts and zero ability to write lollll

Oh, anon. I saw "babysitting jee" and could not get the image of Tommy looking at dollar store kids coloring books out of my head. And here we are 🖤

"Are you sure you're okay with it?" Buck asked into his phone, balancing it in between his shoulder and ear as he unpacked his locker for the night. "It's just that Tommy and I don't really get a lot of time to see each other with our schedules and everything, and—"

"Buck," Chim interrupted, "Yes I'm sure. I've known Tommy longer than you have, unless you've somehow forgot that since the last time you begged me for old, embarrassing photos of the man."

"Yeah yeah," Buck mumbled, "I know I know, sorry." Chim made a satisfied hum. Buck finished zipping up his bag. "Bet I know him better though."

Chimney started squawking indignantly over the phone. Buck grinned into his chest.

So, Buck invited Tommy to come babysit Jee with him that night, nervous the whole time he typed the text.

-i know it's not really a great date setting

He typed after he sent the initial message.

-totally ok to say no

He was stupid to be nervous. The reply came almost immediately.

-Are you kidding? I've been waiting to meet that girl ever since Chimney sent me those first pictures.

-Of course I'll be there

---

Tommy met him at Buck's door with a sweet grin and a bunch of coloring books in his hand. Buck couldn't do anything but stare at him for a moment and smile back.

"Hi."

"Hi."

Buck wondered if those butterflies in his stomach would ever go away. When Tommy leaned forward and pressed a gentle, quick kiss onto his lips, Buck came to the conclusion that there was no possible way they ever would.

"I brought these," Tommy said as he walked into the apartment, shaking the coloring books in the air and looking just a little bashful about it. "Didn't want to show up empty handed but I figured wine wasn't the right call for the venue."

Buck chuckled and shut the door behind him. "You definitely figured right." He pointed over toward the media area. "Wanna meet the star of the show?"

Tommy grinned. "More excited to see her than you, really."

Buck scoffed with feigned-offense and pinched Tommy's arm before moving his hand to the small of Tommy's back, pressing him gently toward where Jee was set up in front of his couch.

Jee looked up from her toys with wide eyes when they came into view. "Hey hey, princess, I got someone for you to meet!" Buck held his free hand out to point at his boyfriend. "This is Tommy. Tommy, this is Jee-Yun." She kept still in contemplation and made a humming noise up at them.

Tommy crouched down and gave her a little wave, and Buck would have laughed at the sight of such a big man making himself so small if it weren't the most endearing thing he'd seen in ages.

"Hi Jee-Yun. It's really nice to meet you," Tommy said with a quiet voice Buck'd never heard before. Jee just kept staring over at him with blinking, assessing eyes. "I really like your sparkly dress," he continued, and that seemed to do it. Jee broke out into a wide, squinty-eyed smile and let out one of those little kid laughs that melted hearts.

"Sequins," Jee said brightly; or at least tried to say, there was definitely an 's' sound in there somewhere.

The floor became their home for the next few hours, Jee happily adjusting to her new friend and toddling between the two of them, carting markers and dolls and pieces of Goldfish back and forth across the carpet. The two of them got easily talked into playing Barbies for one memorable twenty minute stretch, in which Buck learned quite a few things about Tommy's sense of fashion.

"You can't put those rain boots on Tiffany when she's wearing that dress, they don't go at all," Buck said contemptuously.

Tommy rolled his eyes. "Why not? There's yellow in the belt." He squinted and held Tiffany up a little closer to his face. "Sort of."

Buck groaned painfully. "They're way to clunky for that outfit! And it's not even raining, Tommy! Why would she be wearing rain boots?"

Tommy blinked at him for a second before slowly tilting his head up toward the ceiling. Of his very-much-indoors living room. Buck groaned louder.

Jee solved the problem easily by shoving the rain boots onto Tiffany's arms and yelling out Gloves! Buck was a little miffed he didn't think of that first.

Dolls, juice-box breaks, Buck chasing Jee around the first floor making firetruck sounds and sending Tommy into stitches from where he was still sprawled in front of the TV—the evening passed all too quickly and with more laughing than either of them had done in weeks. Which of course meant that by the time that Maddie and Chimney texted that they were going to be heading back soon, both grown men were beyond pooped and covered in more sticky substances than was probably recommended by most health codes. Jee had not decided to take it easy on the new guy, that's for sure.

Buck had handed a squirming Jee over to Tommy a bit ago while he got his niece's stuff all organized back together in her bag. By the time he'd gotten the rest of her leftover snacks out of the fridge and made a passable effort at tidying up the counters, the excitable sounds of Tommy and Jee's earlier conversations had died down and Buck decided it was about time he headed over to check up on them.

He was greeted with the sight of the two of them tucked into the couch, Jee set up on Tommy's lap with one of her new coloring books in her hand and an assortment of markers wedged into the crook of Tommy's bent knee in easy reach beside her. She was quietly and happily plugging away at one of the drawings—a startlingly pink giraffe, Buck thought he could make out—scribbling nonsensically across the page with an intently closed fist. Tommy had an arm resting along one of her sides to keep her from falling off, but the man himself was very much not paying too much attention anymore. His head was lolled back against the cushion, eyelids fluttering as he caught a few needed minutes of rest. Buck wasn't worried; he knew by the way Tommy's finger was still drawing lazy shapes along the frills of Jee's sparkly dress that Tommy'd be awake and aware in an instant if she needed him.

Buck stole a moment to just stand there and watch without either of them noticing. He took it in.

Tommy. His boyfriend. With a baby tucked happy against his chest.

Unbelievably small compared to him yet being held with all the gentleness in the world. His boyfriend and his niece. Both safe and content, on his couch.

Something tugged warm and tight behind Buck's ribs. The feeling almost toppled him over, dragged the breath from his lungs, love, pride, want.

He could have been sick with it.

He quietly padded over and lowered himself onto the cushion next to them before he could get too overwhelmed. He couldn't help himself. He leaned over and pressed a lingering kiss against where he knew Tommy's dimple was, and soon enough felt Tommy's smile underneath his lips.

"You having a good time there, Jee?" Buck asked quietly, pulling back just enough to see her. She twisted around to nod empathetically up at him.

"Uncle Tommy got me a jungle," she said, holding her booklet up with a grin, and Buck let out a surprised noise.

"Uncle Tommy, huh?" He teased, poking Tommy in the ribs and looking at him fondly. Tommy swatted his hand away and then grabbed his fingers before he could retreat too far, and Buck let him tug him in close and rest their now tangled hands against his side. Buck settled in sideways against the back of the couch and tried to push down the fondness bubbling up inside him before it burst.

"She said it earlier," Tommy said, brow furrowed just a bit. Buck wanted to press it out with his thumb. "It felt mean to correct her." Buck just hummed and squeezed his hand until he'd relaxed back into the couch again.

Tommy let him rest his forehead against his shoulder, and the three of them whiled away the next quarter hour laughing at Jee's animal noises and picking crazy colors for tigers and monkeys and toucans.

Maddie and Chimney showed up before for too long, greeting Tommy with just as much warmth as they did Buck, especially after they saw just how adamant Jee was about hanging off of Tommy's calf and not letting him go even in the face of Goldfish bribes.

Maddie and Chimney finally got her detached with the promise of an extra bedtime story, and in a flurry of side-hugs and handshakes and little versions of such for Jee, they said their goodbyes. Tommy waved them out the door with an arm around Buck's shoulders.

They stumbled up to bed that night too tired for much else other than sleep, Buck's heart skipping a beat in his chest every time he caught Tommy's eye or felt him brush against him as they moved around the loft. Tommy's strong arms wrapped around him as they drifted off. Buck pressed himself hard back into Tommy's chest and fell asleep to the feeling of feather-light kisses pressed against the back of his neck and a heart beating alongside his own.

[kamii-2]

“you thought wrong”

so sorry for not posting a chapter in almost 2 months but i hope you guys enjoy this long-ish chapter! a part of this chapter is based off of a fanfic i read a while ago, im not sure who wrote it or who the fic was about but if i ever find out who it is i will definitely give them a shoutout type thing. i’d also like to say this chapter is where things start to like really happen (idk how else to word it, hopefully you get what im saying) and im very sorry if the beginning of the sorry is confusing in any way, also act like they’re all old enough to drink.

warning(s): cussing, drinking, kissing

genre: fluff

pairing(s): kk arnold x reader

“you thought wrong” masterlist

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chapter 3: “is this some kind of prank?”

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the moment you accidentally opened the door then shut it, kk pulled away from the girl she was making out with and ran to ice, not telling the other girl what was going on. “ice, i think i messed up any chances i had with y/n. she just walked in on me making out with another girl.” kk told her best friend, trying to catch her breath from running down the flight of stairs. “why would you even make out with someone else if you wanted her so bad? are you actually stupid?” ice was mad that kk would even do something like that, wanting a girl then making out with another, it made no sense. “i haven’t done anything with anybody in a while and the girl offered so why not take up that offer?” kk said, half joking. kk thought about where you could’ve went, “she left second she came back down here.” ice said as she took a sip of her drink. “great.” was all kk said as she plopped down next to her best friend.

-

kk was all you could think about while you laid in bed, trying to sleep. after seeing her kissing another girl it made you realize how in love with her you were. you wished you were the one she was kissing, not some random girl at a house party who probably just wanted to use kk for sex. the image of her and the other girl kept replaying in your head again and again, you couldn’t take it anymore so you tried to watch tiktok to forget about kk and the stupid girl she was with. when you opened tiktok the first thing you seen was an edit of kk. “oh my God.” you said out loud as you got off the app and turned on your tv. you decided to just watch some netflix until you fell asleep.

when you woke up with a mild headache, you didn’t drink too much so your hang over wasn’t as bad as it usually was when you drank. you got up and took some medicine to ease the headache and drank water to help the pill go down your throat. you grabbed your phone and seen that symphony had texted you a few times asking if you were okay, you told her about how all you thought about was kk last night and how when you opened tiktok she was the first thing you seen. you two continued to text about what happened last night and other random things until symphony just randomly stopped texting you back for a good 20 minutes. you brushed it off and went on with your day, thinking she was busy or her phone died. in reality, symphony got a text from kk’s best friend, ice, on instagram.

-instagram direct messages-

@ice.brady: hey this is symphony right?

@symphony_roy: yea why?

@ice.bradyy: be honest, does y/n like kk bc kk likes her a lot and doesn’t believe me that y/n likes her back. @ice.bradyy: pls tell me i promise to not show kk like fr

@symphony_roy: yes 😭 ive been telling y/n since the day she told me that kk is gay and likes her back but her slow ass won’t believe me

@ice.brady: bro they act the same way exact same way 😭@ice.bradyy: anyway the reason im texting you is bc i think we should make them go in a blind date but don’t tell them the gender of the person bc i don’t want them to find out immediately

@symphony_roy: wait that’s a really good idea @symphony_roy: but we need to plan this more before we dive right into it

-real life-

after they planned out their entire plan, symphony went to your dorm. “hey.” you greeted as she barged in, using the spare key you had gave her. “so…. how do you feel about blind dates?” she asked while clasping her hands together, taking a seat on the couch next to you. “uhm, they’re okay i guess… why?” you reply while stopping what you were doing on your phone and side eyeing her. “because you’re going on one on monday.” symphony stated, “what?!?” you yelled while whipping your head to look at her, “i did not sign up for that!” symphony just stared at you, a small smirk on her face. “well, you’re going on it, i don’t care what you say.” symphony shrugged while getting up and leaving, “bye, remember you have a date in two days, i’ll send you the details later.” she closed the door.

-

when you woke up you seen kk had followed you back on every app you followed her on, seeing this made your stomach do backflips. you were a bit embarrassed because you had followed her for ages and she just now followed you back but you didn’t really care because atleast she followed you. as the day went on you kept stalking kk, being careful to not like any super old pictures on instagram or old tiktoks. you were stalking so hard you even found her mom’s facebook page. in the middle of your stalking, symphony barged in your room, “okay so what are you gonna wear tomorrow?” she asked while sitting at the edge of your bed, facing you. “i don’t know, probably jean shorts and a crop top.” you shrugged, “basic as hell. wear something more revealing, you gotta show off all that ass to them.” she half-joked, “bro then you find my outfit.” you sighed at her.

symphony went to your closet and started to look through everything to find the perfect outfit for you. after about 10 minutes she found a short, tight, light pink dress. you bought it last month and never got the chance to wear it. “it’s perfect, i’ll tell your date to wear something on the nicer side. you guys will look so cute together.” she smiled while holding the dress up. you were still unsure on the whole blind date thing but you were kind of excited for it, maybe you’ll meet your soulmate. you had thought about who it could be and you thought about it being kk but you weren’t sure if symphony would do something like that.

symphony stayed over for the rest of the day and didn’t go home until sunset. you two talked about life, ordered pizza, and watched a few movies sherrie she went back to her dorm. you were too nervous to go to bed, knowing that the next day at 7pm you would be meeting up with a potential complete stranger for dinner.

-

the whole day you were super nervous and could barely think straight. part of you was thinking about just not going but you know if you did that then symphony would rip you a new one. you were hoping the date was a girl and hoping it was kk but you knew it wasn’t gonna be her, kk was just making out with another girl 2 days ago, she wouldn’t switch that fast, or so you thought. at around 6:00 you started getting ready, putting on the dress and some white heels that made you an inch taller, and putting on light makeup. symphony showed up to your dorm at 6:34, “im taking you to the restaurant because im gonna sit a table or two away and watch yall.” she said with a huge smile on her face. you nodded in response and continued to get ready.

on the way there you were so nervous to where you thought you could throw up. the whole car ride you were silent and had short answers when symphony talked to you. “y/n its okay i promise. dont worry about anything. all you gotta do is meet this person, talk to them, eat dinner, then you’re done.” symphony reassured you, keeping her eyes on the road. you sighed and tried to think on the bright side of it, if you didn’t like this person then you’d probably never have to talk to them again. as you got closer you got more and more nervous but you kept thinking about what symphony said and it helped it go down.

when you two got to the restaurant you immediately got out and walked into the restaurant. symphony pointed, “your date’s already here.” you stopped dead in your tracks and whipped your head towards her. “is this some kind of prank?” you asked while wide eyes. “nope. your date is kk.” symphony laughed while pushing you towards the table. “symphony you’re fucking lying.” you said while trying to resist her pushing you. “i’m not, now go sit down and talk to her.” she said while pushing you again and walking away. you sighed before slowly walking over to the table that kk was at. when she looked up from her phone she paused for a second before she realized that you were her blind date. when you sat down it was quiet for a second before she said something. “hey y/n. how’s life been?” she said, not knowing what else to say. “it’s been fine, how about you?” you asked her, “good. did you know that i was your date?” kk asked with a smile. “no, symphony literally came into my dorm and told me that i was going on a blind date, didn’t tell me anything else.” you two laughed and continued to talk.

the night went very well, you two talked about everything under the sun and flirted a lot. symphony and ice were watching from a few tables over and talked about how cute you two were together. “i’m glad they made us go on this date.” you admitted while admiring kk, looking her up and down. “i agree, maybe i can get your number or something?” kk asked, “yea.” you say as you proceed to tell her your number. after she got your number the flirting was nonstop, now she was certain you liked her back. the rest of the night you two continued to talk about random stuff and even talked about going on another date.

at free you guys paid for the food snd drink you both went over to symphony and ice’s table. “hey guys.” ice said with a smirk, “do yall wanna go to a club or something?” symphony asked while standing up. “sure why not.” you said, “okay i’ll send you the address.” symphony said, talking to ice. ice nodded and you all went to the cars. “so how was it?” symphony questioned you the moment you both got in the car, “we were flirting the whole time and she asked for my number.” you answered, “aren’t you glad i made you go on this date?” she smiled while pulling out of the parking lot and driving to the bar, you nodded and told her more about the date.

after you got your ID’s checked, kk grabbed your hand and pulled you into the bathroom. “what’s wrong?” you asked when you reached a stall. “nothing.” she mumbled before kissing you, you immediately kiss back. the kiss felt magical, the way your lips fit together perfectly made your stomach do frontflips. you relunctsntly pulled away for air, “damn.” was all kk could say as she went back for more.

==================================

i’m so sorry this took like 2 months to get out but i still hope you enjoyed!! i hope you have a good day/night, love you 💋💋

[chefkids]

Did you notice at the end of s3 ep9 carmy ia getting ready for Ever's funeral service and the last shot it's just a scrunchie and Mike's Jesús pastor image?? Idk what that means but that shot is stuck in my brain

The Scrunchie Does Not Fit In, but Carmy is Saving it for Later

Carmy finds a funeral card from Mikey's funeral in his suit jacket and puts it on top of a book next to the scrunchie and some bobby pins.

The book is I DON’T FIT IN – My Wild Ride Through The Punk and Power Pop Trenches with The NERVES and THE BEAT, which is a memoir about the lead singer from the band The Beat, but not the british one that wrote Save it For Later.

There are actually two bands called The Beat, an English one and an American one. The two bands came up around the same time and were often confused with each other, so the English one went by The English Beat and the American one went by Paul Collins' Beat. They actually ended up touring together. So why have a book about the Paul Collins' Beat when the recurring song this season is written by The English Beat?

Save it for Later has a few versions of it throughout the season. The first version we hear is from the American singer Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam when Sydney is on her way to The Bear after the incident and there is montage of classic Chicago spots. And if you listen closely to the full song, at the very end you can hear in the backing vocals "can't find a better man" from Better Man by Pearl Jam. We know Carmy is a big fan of Pearl Jam. Come Back by Pearl Jam was the song playing in the table scene with Sydney and we know the music in the show is supposed to represent their inner thoughts and feelings, so at this point Sydney is still thinking about Carmy.

Then an instrumental version of Save it for Later plays when Richie is talking to Jess on the phone about the Ever funeral. When Sydney is talking to Shapiro and he makes her the offer, the original Save it for Later by The English Beat plays.

They are setting up the American vs British confusion. Sydney is going to be torn between Carmy and Luca (and Shapiro by de facto), the same way Carmy is torn between Sydney and Claire. The song is instrumental, neither british or american, with Richie because he is the puppet master in this whole british vs american ordeal that is going to happen between them.

So much of this season and the previous have been about confusing people or projecting them on to the other, like with Claire and Sydney in Season 2, and then again in Season 3 with the polka dot dish freezer incident. This all ties back to the plotlines of Vertigo and A Midsummer Night's Dream that are referenced in Season 3 where the love interests are frequently confused with each other, sometimes on purpose and sometimes on accident.

The bobby pins seems more like a Claire item that she probably left behind, but when Claire's hair is tied up it is always with a plain black hair tie. The hair clip at the beginning of Tomorrow is probably Claire's, but a girly floral pink scrunchie? That is so Sydney.

The Bear had pink floral dinner plates back in Season 2 before Carmy switched to natural earthenware in Season 3, which also when he basically erased Sydney from The Bear. The scrunchie is a remnant of Season 2.

Sydney has been seen in pink and florals, whereas Claire never has. Sydney also loves patterns. From her bandanas to her shirts and jackets.

She actually has a whole book about them sitting in her locker. She was probably the one who picked the tropical wallpaper in The Bear's bathroom.

Claire is really never seen wearing patterns or prints aside from Friends & Family night (aka ClaireCarmy's relationship funeral) when she wears a black floral shrug, which is the last time Carmy saw Claire. The funeral card is notably Mikey's, not Marcus' mom, which has also always been tied back to Sydney and the Let it rip note. He texted Sydney before opening the note and then had Richie give it to her in a frame to put on her expo.

It's easy to see why he might confuse the scrunchie with Claire's things and put them together when the don't fit actually fit in, the same way The Beat's get confused. And probably the same way Sydney is going to feel confused about Luca vs Carmy in season 4. Is Carmy going to realize the scrunchie is Sydney's and not Claires? It's in his bedroom so I doubt it was Sydney herself that put it there. Seems like he is once again using Claire to project his feelings for Syd, by missing her instead of Sydney.

[jaemlonfz]

MOVIE STAR

jaehyun x fem!reader

tw: english isnt my first language correct me if theres any mistakes actors!au, sex, jaehyun is kinda rude at first but gets cute at the end, creampie, sex on the couch, unprotected sex but please wrap yourself, I didn't proofread, if I have errors, help me, idk if there more.

wc: 2,9k

synopsis: you get really shy after a makeout scene with jaehyun, on your new kdrama and he makes a way of you get over it - or get even more shy.

author's note: i posted this last year and im editing it so looks better, english isnt my mother tongue so im sorry if theres any mistakes

movie star - cix

Last year was a wonderful year for your career, getting the attention you wanted and completely fair to your work, you finally started to see your career take off like a rocket. It was thanks to the second drama you did, having the role of the protagonist's best friend, the few scenes that you were the protagonist made many people appreciate your talent and started calling you for several series and films. This is one of them.

This new drama consisted of you as the lead, the famous Jeong Jaehyun as the second lead, and Hwang In-Youp as the second romance option. The script was really that common drama thing, it has a plot between two rival CEOs - you and Jaehyun - and your secretary - In-Youp. But the story at the end is about who you would end up with, and in this case it's Jaehyun.

His personality on camera is surprising, he managed to be a brat in person, even though he is the grandson of a CEO of a large company.

After several recordings, the satisfying last episodes arrived, a bit of a reward for those who were tense during the entire drama. In case you and Jaehyun finally act like a romantic couple, and that's where our problem comes in.

There was one scene in particular, after a long day of bad luck you come home and collapse in bed tired. When Jaehyun plans to make a surprise visit to your apartment and he finds you totally tense, lying face down on the bed he decides to treat you. The tiring night turned into something super fun, with movies and popcorn, something simple and pure.

Until the TV light tired their eyes, so they decided to sleep. The thing is, none of them could sleep a wink. Even though the night was fun, the concerns of your work came to the fore when you remembered that you would step in that place again, and in Jaehyun's head, there was no intense thought, but images of you rolling in slow motion, making it clear that he was extremely grateful and lucky to have you.

Moonlight illuminated the room, and two people awake while the clock read 1:27 in the morning, and you couldn't take it anymore. "Are you awake?"

"Yeah, you can't sleep either?" He asked and you soon grumbled in response. Undoing the shell, you turned it to face him.

"What's going on in your head, is it insomnia again?" Innocent words come out of your mouth

"You're on my mind, that's why I can't sleep" He smiled breathing heavily. Approaching without noticing, when he noticed he was already glued to his body. Now with both heavy breaths he decided to close the path, kissing her mouth for minutes that felt like a few more hours. Kissing down her neck and neck of her breasts. His breathing was a lot heavier now.

The scene was in the script. You had to record it, but this kiss was so sincere, Jaehyun had his hands on your precious waist, moving his thumbs in circles making you shiver just thinking about it.

Thank God that the producers shouted that the take was over, as the scene was on the brink of going off script. When you heard the warning, you got out from under the covers and ran to your dressing room. Taking a deep breath and mentally hammering that it was just a scene, and apparently there would be no need to redo it.

After a few minutes of the incident, you were already in the dressing room, with an iced americano on top of the dressing table, when someone knocked on the door. Screaming they can come in you were amazed when the director entered with Jaehyun in your small room.

'Thanks to your coworker here we are going to make some changes to the script, putting in more mature scenes. After everything the characters have been through they deserve a little bit." He finished the sentence and left the room leaving you and Jaehyun alone.

Your cheeks and ears were the deepest shade of red and you were blinking hard trying to believe this was just a dream.

When Jaehyun really stopped imagining what the additions to the script would be, he looked at you, and saw your face as red as a strawberry.

"It's just a scene." He said laughing. "You think you can't do it? The most pleasurable scene of all and you'll have to call your stunt double?"

He moved closer and closer, never giving your cheeks a chance to return to their normal tone.

"Are you going to have to call a stunt double just because you're too embarrassed to give yourself up to me?" He laughed, releasing the cold air on your neck. "Where's your professionalism?"

Now Jaehyun looked exactly like the character. Arrogant with a sky-high ego, but a hottie. And you were like your character too, always with red ears and extremely hurt by your teasing, but you changed the script - at least you tried - took your still arms out of place and grabbed Jaehyun's chest trying to throw him away, but failing miserably, as he had now taken ypur hands and bent down to kiss the palms of both.

"I'll see you soon." He whispered in her ear and gave a peck seconds before walking out the door.

Your heart was racing, and after that damned conversation you had to play the part without calling in any backup, just to prove something to that damn brat.

In the new scene, you were lying on the sofa while Jaehyun's hands explored your neck, slowly sliding down, his lips were sealed to yours and your hair was completely messed up, but in such a sexy way that you wanted to die.

Seconds later his hands descended to her waist and his lips slipped in the lap of your breasts, his face was bright and his eyes completely dark. When the director shouted "Cut!" you practically jumped off the couch like crazy and ran without even hearing feedback on your acting.

Since then the scenes have become much more difficult to record, your heart has been racing more and more and the amount of times you stutter seems abnormal. A few weeks ago you and Jaehyun were practically best friends, at the end of every recording you would go out drinking and having fun, but now you leave him as soon as the take is over and he definitely noticed.

-

"How can my lead actress run away from me like that" - Jaehyun said entering your dressing room and locking the door. From the look on his face he had plotted something and was close to executing his new plan.

Your face has already turned red remembering those lips wandering over your neck, stuttering uncontrollably you started to walk backwards until you hit the wall.

I know what happened to you, and that's pretty sweet to be honest - He followed you like a magnet follows metal, soon joining you by the wall.

His bare muscular arm - thanks to the blessed tank top he decided to wear today - was resting on the wall next to your reddened face.

"The directors are starting to complain, saying that your acting and professionalism has gone downhill" He said with those pink lips at the tip of your ear.

"If it continues like this they will end the series, and end the contract." Now he kissed your ear. "I know how to solve this."

That was his plan. And you knew it, but you were tempted. Did your career just take off and it's about to crash? You were lucky when you signed the company papers as it was one of the biggest in Korea. But now that was a disadvantage, if they fire you they'll spread it all over the press and you'll end up broke. So you fell for Jaehyun's miserable plan.

How would you solve this? - Your voice trembled along your legs.

"If you fuck with me, you'll lose the embarrassment of kissing me in front of the cameras." He said kissing down and biting your neck.

"We don't have more kissing scenes." You complained while giving space to Jaehyun, who was about to fit his knee between your legs.

"But I can change that. Again." Now he looked into your eyes, going through your physical body being able to see even your soul. "Do you want my help?"

Jaehyun's dark eyes pleaded with you without saying anything. And you couldn't deny or nod. You only managed to kiss that pretty mouth without saying anything.

In a matter of seconds you are pressed firmly against the wall, your hands on Jaehyun's neck, scratching, and his hands are divided. One on your neck trying to pull you closer and the other squeezing your waist.

Your eyes were closed, but when the kiss broke and you went to admire Jaehyun, your vision was blurrier than the streets when covered in fog. That was Jaehyun's effect on you.

It covered you like smoke leaving you dizzy, without vision and any senses.

And in that not seeing straight, you just felt your weight being carried to the couch. You were sitting normally, if not counting the fact that your chair was Jaehyun's lap. You tried to sloppily kiss him again, but that was impossible with your shirt between your faces.

She was being lifted up so they could have a perfect view of your bra covered chest - which was left there for now.

Now the kiss was successfully conceived now that you was shirtless. Your legs spread between Jaehyun's thick thighs were in constant motion up and down his lap. Until everything stopped.

"You look beautiful with those jeans, I don't even want to take them off." Jaehyun bit his lower lip as he said those words.

"But I'm so looking forward to seeing the color of your panties, especially what they hide" Now he would throw you on the couch. Turning you over, putting your back on the pillow.

Kissing your breasts you can't help but encourage him. "Light pink, with a little bow." You whispered in the brunette's ear.

You can feel his smile in the valley of your boobs . That while he was still there, because seconds later his mouth was somewhere else.

With sloppy moans accompanying another confusing kiss you could feel Jaehyun's cold hands go down to the bottom of your pants, then down as well.

Your tight jeans - which enhanced your ass in an absurd way - were already somewhere else, because now all Jaehyun admired was you, your bra - which honestly he doesn't know why he hasn't taken it off yet - and your light pink panties, which at the moment was already in another tone due to the humidity of your pussy.

Reading the brunette's thoughts, you grabbed the boy's strong arms and helped him unclasp your bra. Now with your breasts flying in his sight, he shifted again. Repeating the position leaving you in his lap. You wiggled around in his black jeans - specifically in the tent next to his belly. - His hands resting on the back of the couch and your head leaning back releasing the most pornographic moans ever seen while Jaehyun sucked your breasts like a child.

Biting the nipple and sucking the round - relatively large - while groping the other, making a switch in a few minutes.

Your cunt was now throbbing and trying to behave by squeezing into nothingness. Jaehyun - you just meowed and that was all it took for him to notice. Your nails itched and pulled Jaehyun's shirt off, giving you the pleasure of scratching that chest.

Back played on the couch, you breathed hard rolling your eyes just feeling the wind in your hot pussy.

In a flash you saw Jaehyun tucking the pink fabric into his pocket, and then you saw his head ducking into its warmth.

The pleasure that Jaehyun's mouth would bring to your body is something unimaginable and surprisingly unique. No one would ever dare to do like him. The tongue you've kissed many times was kissing somewhere else, but it kept being sloppy making everything more fun.

Your head was empty, and you were meaningless - other than the warmth and affection received between your legs - so the noise you made was so loud, but you didn't even care. After all I just felt like moaning like a bitch when Jaehyun told you.

"Were you a porn star before taking on this role? You moan like one." Aggressive words were thrown at you, but that still didn't stop you from continuing like a whore.

You've been close since he started labor, but when his tongue starts teasing your soft spot, your clit, you freak out.

Tired of listening to you exposing to the world how good he was, his arm fumbled in the pockets until he found the pink fabric. Tucking the wet panties into your mouth, and swirling your tongue around the sensitive hole, you climaxed with teary eyes.

"Now shut up." He said lifting your pussy and taking the tissue from your throat. "I want my souvenir back."

He said and kissed you, spreading the taste of your pussy all over your mouth.

Jaehyun was so naughty and so precious at the same time. It's been months since you had any kind of relationship, and even with the rude words Jaehyun didn't hurt you.

You were almost freaking out because he made you feel so good without even doing the full job - untill now.

Innovating the position now only you were sitting on the couch. Your knees were propped up on your chest giving a magnificent view of your swollen pussy.

Jaehyun was quick to get out of his dark jeans and underwear, spitting onto his pre-cum wet dick, in a matter of seconds you could feel him getting into position.

"Open your legs please." - Surprisingly he begged, and you gave in so easily. Whimpering in response and the icy contact you obeyed by stretching your legs.

"If you feel pain let me know." - He said kissing her lip. Jaehyun is so readable now. His brows were furrowed and he was biting his lip so hard it looked like any second it would bleed. On the other hand, they felt like they were tearing you apart.

Jaehyun's thick cock invaded you completely, every firm breath you took, your insides tightened, and you both suffered from it. You swore you saw Jaehyun shake, and he swore he looked like he was going to explode.

You closed your eyes tightly when you got used to it. Head shaking when Jaehyun was free to move.

Now it was you who was trembling. Jaehyun reached you in full when standing still, now in motion you came in a few moves.

It fit so well, and you felt magnificent, and seconds later, the news was coming. Its liquid exploded on Jaehyun who had to hold back from doing the same in less than 3 minutes inside.

You were already getting used to it. Getting used to swinging full length when Jaehyun hammered you. Your head bobbing back and forth, your hands destroying his pecs - thanks to your beautiful nails - and your boobs bouncing. It was already perfect, you were going to arrive for the third time and possibly pass out thanks to your fog, until everything changed

Jaehyun in a matter of seconds he lifted your thigh and rested his knee on your shoulder, invading you even more. The tip of his cock destroyed the beginning of your womb, and your bleary eyes changed. The cloud has changed.

Your head was spinning and you were seeing stars, you squeezed when you felt your third one coming, and this time Jaehyun felt the same.

You broke out in a cold sweat when he came on you. He shot all his flavor inside you, he made you a pie. And then your squirt came hard.

Your waters dripped from your eyes and your pussy. You cried when he laughed and said you were extremely hot while you came.

"I'm sorry I didn't talk that much when I was inside you." He placed a kiss on your cheek and walked over to your dressing table to grab the wet wipes packet.

"I was very concentrated, I wanted to impress you" He laughed as he walked back to your side.

You who had already closed your legs in shame had red cheeks when he opened it again. It was impossible not to moan as he cleaned you up. Jaehyun looked like an angel between her legs.

"Thank you so much." He kissed your thigh.

-

You were already dressed - you were still without your panties - when he sat next to you on the couch.

"I'm sorry about the couch too, it must have been uncomfortable for you, such a small place." - He fed his addiction of kissing your cheek. "Go out with me tomorrow and we'll finish in my bed, it's much bigger."

He turned your face giving another kiss, but this time on your mouth.

"What time do you pick me up?" You replied laughing shyly.

You were definitely not embarrassed to be around him anymore. And you didn't even notice the change.

His plans always worked.

@jaemlonfz 2023

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 407: Wait Why Are You Running Away

Previously on BnHA: Kacchan figured out how to control his quirk upgrade and was totally chill and normal about it. Definitely not terrifying at all. He actually spent the entire chapter smiling and laughing like the wholesome little boy he is. I don’t know why Kid For One is so freaked out about it. He even politely introduced himself using his childhood nickname. Clearly he just wants to be friends with you, KFO!

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “sorry to keep you waiting, here’s the AFO and Yoichi flashback you ordered at long last” and proceeds to serve a nightmarish stew of HUMAN MISERY and RATS and STABBING and CARNAGE and SO MUCH MURDER and THE SINGLE MOST FUCKED-UP CASE OF CODEPENDENCY ANYONE HAS EVER WRITTEN. I was not even remotely prepared for any of this, and if anyone else claims that they were, I will call you a liar to your face. If this chapter had a mouth it would scream. Or just sob, ceaselessly and uncontrollably. I’m really glad Horikoshi is on break next week because that man needs to take a fucking nap. My god.

okay WOW

anyone else read the first two words and just immediately say to themselves, “oh okay, so it’s gonna be one of those chapters”? I mean, I guess we were due for a darker chapter after last week’s Kacchan Comedy Tour. but idk, I just wasn’t expecting “homeless sick prostitute with a drinking problem” levels of dark

AND SHE’S PREGNANT?!

what exactly is this manga rated again? doesn’t this backstory seem just a little bit raw for the impressionable kiddos??

has anyone actually checked in on Horikoshi recently? you know, just to make sure he is okay??

what a fun and wholesome manga this is

the lil baby arm covered in blood with the AFO hole on the palm. lying next to the dead mom hand. what an image to sear into our minds. I guess it’s been a while since he killed any dogs. gotta keep us on our toes somehow

also wasn’t expecting AFO and Yoichi to be twins! that puts an interesting spin on their relationship, because it’s usually a closer bond than even regular siblings. especially with all of that delightful shared trauma from a young age!!

yes, exactly

ohhhh this chapter is gonna hurt me, isn’t it. okay. ooooooookay. let’s do this

OH I’M SORRY, THERE’S MORE?!

Horikoshi my dude. you do realize that their mom dying in childbirth and the two of them just barely surviving and growing up as street orphans would have already been MORE than tragic enough, backstory-wise. you did not have to turn this into a freaking horror show with RATS TRYING TO EAT THEIR NEWBORN SELVES jesus christ

and THAT’S where you chose to put a one year timeskip?!

what the fuck am I reading here, you guys. no please tell me, I am actually desperate to understand

so the narrator is saying that some of the quirks manifested later in life, in “pubescent and pre-pubescent stages”, which is interesting because it’s the first time I can recall hearing about someone actually manifesting a quirk that late. maybe Deku’s old OFA cover story was more plausible than I realized

anyway so eventually it occurred to everyone that they should maybe freaking study this shit, idk. and eventually the researchers concluded that the superpowers came from a new gene that apparently isn’t human. and upon hearing that, society apparently lost its freaking mind. which is fascinating to me because it implies that the turning point wasn’t actually the superpowers themselves, but the realization of what it meant

like, so they were apparently fine with it when they thought it was a “mysterious disease”, but somehow it hit different when they learned it wasn’t actually a sickness at all, but instead the Next Step in Evolution. and it became an “us vs them” thing, as opposed to a “we have to cure these poor people” thing. damn

anyway so now Japan is a dystopia and we’re cutting to a big crowd of merc-looking dudes who are getting ready to attack some “meta freaks”, how lovely

but who is this figure in the shadows

I ask politely, as if it wasn’t already beyond obvious that this is AFO about to wreck some people’s shit

ohhhhh my god lmao

hopefully Katsuki and Deku can take the present day AFO out before he winds up looking like this. because this little fella is clearly demonic and idk if anyone can stop him

you all don’t understand. you need to run the fuck away right now

oh shit it’s already too late for them

it’s too late for any of us. it’s over. it’s all fucking over

((((；゜Д゜)))

AFO I am putting the manga down. I am backing away slowly with my hands in the air. I mean you no harm. please for the love of god have mercy

holy

“you see, we told you he wasn’t human” okay Scientific Research Group, you know what?? you win this round I guess

“HE WAS LITERALLY EVIL FROM BIRTH” HORIKOSHI SERIOUSLY ARE YOU OKAY??

HE WAS BORN AN ARROGANT BABY is literally the most terrifying sentence I have ever read

what the entire fuck

it’s a gorgeous sunny mid-November afternoon outside my window. but no matter how hard it tries, the light cannot reach this place

what kind of moron would throw a can of soda at him. officially the stupidest person we have ever seen in this manga

OH MY GOD OF COURSE IT’S HIM LMAO

(ETA: how come baby Yoichi has clothes that fit him perfectly but baby AFO is just stomping around wearing a tablecloth.)

BABY YOICHI. OH MY GOD. HOW THE HELL DID YOU GROW UP TO BE SANE AND KIND AND GOOD. THAT’S MY QUESTION THAT I NEED ANSWERED RIGHT NOW. YOU ARE LITERALLY A MIRACLE. YOU ARE AN IMPOSSIBILITY, DO YOU KNOW THAT

small and weak, but also so, so cute. all of the cuteness genes went straight to him. no wonder AFO was jealous

(ETA: just want to press pause for a second to speculate about what type of twins AFO and Yoichi are, since it has some relevance to the story, and especially to the OFA/AFO quirk lore. so! at first glance the two of them would appear to be fraternal twins, just based on the fact that they have very different appearances, and also the fact that Yoichi doesn’t have the AFO quirk – no holes in his hands, etc. identical twins are born from the same fertilized egg, so in theory they would both have the same sequence of DNA, which means Yoichi would have had the same quirk as AFO. but that doesn’t appear to be the case. so all of that points to them being fraternal, not identical.

on the other hand, there is one piece of evidence in this chapter that does support them being identical twins, and that’s the fact that per the narration, AFO absorbed most of the nutrients from their mother. a few minutes of google fu informed me that this condition is relatively rare, and only happens in cases where two twins share a placenta, which typically is only the case for identical twins. HOWEVER, for what it’s worth, there have also been rare instances where two fraternal twin placentas fuse together and become a single placenta. AND this apparently also increases the chances of one of the twins gaining more of the nutrients and causing the other twin to have a lower birth weight.

so based on the evidence here, my conclusion is that the two of them are most likely fraternal twins with a case of placental fusion. besides, you can’t tell me that stealing his baby brother’s placenta while the two of them are literally still in the womb doesn’t sound like exactly the type of BS that fetus!AFO would pull, lol.)

HEY!?!

okay?!?!?! well to be fair he did throw that soda at him

oh my god this is so fucked up. in like the best and worst way possible

I genuinely couldn’t ask for a better AFO backstory. it’s so incredibly twisted, and you actually do feel sorry for him. or at least I do. but it’s also beyond clear that this kid was FUCKED UP BEYOND ALL REASON right from the get go. zero goodness in him. literally doesn’t see other people as people. sees them as possessions only. things to rule over. not other thinking, feeling human beings. and that includes his own little brother

but. even if it’s not actually what I would call love, there’s still... attachment, there. it’s the closest he can get to actually caring about someone. guh. just, somehow they have both managed to humanize him, and at the same time made him less human than ever. this manga, man. this fucking manga, though

lmao and here we go. Captain Hero

you know, all those times that I made fun of AFO for not knowing how to read, I never suspected that the twist in his backstory would be that he LITERALLY DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO READ dfksjdlfkjslkdf

but seriously though. because Yoichi appears to be self-taught, and I can’t see AFO having the patience for that, and CLEARLY no one else was around to teach him, sooooo...

oh my goodness it’s actually getting wholesome up in here

what a good fucking boy. poor AFO. fuck me, I can’t help it. it’s not your fault you’re the world’s greatest monster you poor bastard

now we’re cutting to THREE YEARS LATER. okay

is he going to declare war on the glowing baby

typical teenager concerned about nothing but likes and view counts. AFO you would be so much happier if you stopped worrying about all of that and just focused on your own growth

oh, lol. well that was quick

(ETA: r.i.p. Damien.)

“this guy had more instagram followers than me. so I killed him” honey. sweetie pie. you need therapy

omfg

all this time I was wondering who AFO’s middle school lit teacher was who had failed so spectacularly at teaching him reading comprehension. and it was YOICHI ALL ALONG. omg

“and, presumably, that’s how it always was and always will be.” dude. can you imagine listening to AFO’s oral book report on A Tale of Two Cities. “ahem. it was the Best of Times. the end” buddy noooooooo

it was at that moment when Yoichi knew, etc. etc.

oh my GOD I scrolled down to the next panel right after this one and I just IMMEDIATELY DIED LAUGHING

“WAS IT SOMETHING I SAID” ffffffffffffffff I fucking can’t omfg

NOW THIS HUSSY IS STEALING HIS BROTHER AWAY FROM HIM NOOOOOOO

HE’S HIS!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!! THAT’S NOT ALLOWED!!!

oh my god the hands. so wait, is this just the standard symbolic BnHA handholding, or are there More Levels To This. when exactly did Yoichi pass OFA on to Kudou. like is that why the sudden close-up and all that? omg

WHAT!!!!

OH THAT’S THE END, HUH? THAT’S THE END RIGHT THERE, AND THAT’S JUST HOW IT IS. I SEE. OKAY THEN. EXCUSE ME WHILE I PUT MY LAPTOP DOWN AND GO INTO THE NEXT ROOM AND SCREAM INTO A PILLOW

oh my god. and break next week too. this is what you guys have been dealing with this entire time huh. I understand your feelings now. godfuckingdammit lmao

[sokkadora]

we can’t be friends — crosshair x fem!reader

inspired by: we can’t be friends (wait for your love) by ariana grande

summary: a clinic on pabu offers to erase the pain that came along with crosshair leaving the batch, but how will he react once he gets back and sees you with his brother?

a/n: crosshair and the reader never had an established relationship for this fic, but reader had a deep love for crosshair! also NO hunter hate on this page that is my man :P also i might make a part 2 but idk

wc: 2,078

warning(s): angst, no happy ending for this couple bb, flashbacks, memory wiping, reader has poor self/body image, kinda smutty but it's crosshair so, friends with benefits, unrequited requited love for hunter

︿︿︿︿︿︿ ✎ᝰ . . . .

‘You have given extensive thought behind your decision and give “Brighter Days Inc.” the exclusive permission to remove this person from your memory:’

Stopping your pen under the last word, you hesitate.

‘Maybe this was a bad idea,’ you think with a soft sigh, glancing at the woman in the room across from you; one seat for her, and another for her box of memories. Yours sits beside you, the weight of what you’re about to do hits you quickly, and suddenly any notion of even looking at the box makes it feel like a ticking time bomb.

The woman across from you strokes a thumb across what must be her late pets collar, and you quickly revert your gaze down to the sheet of paper again. The tip of your pen hovers over the “No” option, but drifts over to the “Yes” box, checking it off, and finally, signing your name at the bottom of your page.

The necklace dangling over your neck feels like iron against fae skin as a nurse comes out of the back room, door quietly creaking open as she calls your name. You stand quickly, handing her the paperwork and the pen with trembling hands before grabbing the box labeled “Crosshair” and walking inside.

MEMORY WIPE INITIATED

“Please, Crosshair?” You beg sweetly, dragging him across the arcade to a claw machine, finally having a bit of free time on your shore leave. 

You’d been trying to convince him to have a break together with the both of you for a while now, away from the boys and the riff raff of the military, but per usual, he was stubborn about it. He’d offhandedly said how childish it was of you to want to play games with him at an arcade instead of your usual… activities, on shore leave. But you got him to agree, seeing as he can barely ever resist how cute you look when you beg.

“Hellcat, this is ridiculous,” Crosshair crosses his arms and glares down into the machine at the plethora of stuffed animals inside. Your eyes had been on the small lothcat in the middle since the both of you had arrived, and you’ve bugged him about it enough that he considered it. “Even Wrecker knows these are rigged.”

“Where’s that overcompensating confidence?” You tease, pulling out a few tokens and placing them in his hand softly. You glance up at him with a soft and pleading look, one that you don’t yet know (and will never know) gets him weak in the knees. “Please, Crosshair? For me?” 

At the sight of your big doe eyes, he scoffs, loading the coins in and barely holding back a smile at your excited squeals and the hand shaking his shoulder gently. It takes him a minute to get a hold on the controls, but after some peeking around the corner of the machine and some naturally perfect aim, he lowers the claw and catches the lothcat.

You gasp, watching excitedly as it stays in the claws grip as it moves over to the prize dump, and as Crosshair retrieves it for you and holds it out.

“Happy now?”

You grin down at the stuffed animal and then at Crosshair before lunging forward, arms wrapping around his shoulders with an breathless laugh, “Thank you.” You grin, nuzzling into the side of his head, and pulling away before he had to chance to hug back.

Overwhelmed with the happiness of the moment, you barely notice the room going dark before the feeling of Crosshair’s surprisingly warm gaze leaves you. You look up, eyebrows furrowing at the sudden void of the arcade.

MEMORY SUCCESSFULLY ERASED.

“Cross?”

“Yes?”

“Am I ugly?” 

Crosshair’s gazes narrows, glancing at you as you lay under the covers of your bed. He lifts his arm to hold up the blanket better, glaring at you, but not angrily as tears begin to well in your eyes. He shakes his head firmly, grunting.

“When I was a kid I thought I was,” You started, having his full attention from the second you walked in the room. You scoff softly at yourself, “I can’t believe I’m crying already, sorry.”

Crosshair doesn’t reply, but instead simply reaches over and wipes your tears; a gesture he never would’ve done in the first months of the arrangement the two of you had, but things had changed. You’d changed him.

“I was so lonely as a kid,” You say softly, the words just pouring out of you. “I don’t think anybody realizes how lonely kids are, even after growing up. We just sort of stop paying attention. Like they don’t matter.”

You sniff, and Crosshair doesn’t seem to want you to stop, so you keep going; relishing in the feeling of his warm hand covering your cheek.

“So, I’m like… eight or so. And I have this really pretty girl doll, that I named after myself that I’d just get so frustrated with,” You wipe your nose with the back of your hand, expecting the embarrassment of sharing the personal memory to rise, but it never comes. “It was some standard I’d hold myself to and whenever I’d find myself not liking myself, I’d look at her and it’d get me so mad. I made it to encourage myself, but it was just a constant reminder of my shortcomings as a person. It’s weird. Like… if I can make myself that pretty, maybe people would finally like me,” You finally glance up to meet Crosshair’s gaze, finding that it’d softened into something unreadable to you. 

He leans over and plants a firm kiss on your mouth, his hand sliding down to grasp the sides of your neck before he pulls back. His hands start wandering down with his mouth that keeps peppering you with kisses, softly murmuring the word ‘pretty’ between each kiss. You writhe under his touch, a hand rising to cover your mouth as a warmth shoots down to your lower stomach. You relish in how safe you feel under him before he… he…

MEMORY SUCCESSFULLY ERASED

“Why won’t you come home?”

Your voice echos through his head as he stares out into the vast horizon where Tipoca City used to stand; where the home he grew up in with his brothers and met you in used to stand. He scoffs, glancing back at you from over his shoulder.

“That is not my home anymore,” He says in a low tone; a warning to anyone else, but you knew you had a bit more leeway with him. Fists clenching at your sides, your gaze narrowed into a glare. “Now leave. Hunter’s staring after you like a kicked dog,”

You don’t bother to glance back at the man you already knew was waiting for you, but at the mention of his name he seemed to back further into the ship to give you some privacy, trusting that Crosshair wouldn’t hurt you, of all people.

“This isn’t about him, Crosshair,” You snapped, “Come home. Please. I need you, and so do your-”

“I don’t need you,” Crosshair says sternly, pivoting on a foot to turn to face you with a cold glare. You reeled slightly at the look; you’d seen it before, but never aimed at you. “I never had and I never will. And if you were as smart as you made yourself seem, you’d join me on the right side of the battle. Just like how I thought you and Hunter didn’t have anything going on,” You open your mouth to correct him; he knew there was nothing happening between Hunter and you. He was your best friend, but Crosshair beat you to the punch, “But I guess looks can be deceiving, huh?”

It felt like a clear blow to a vulnerable moment you’d shared with him— only him — and it nearly sent you to tears. You reached up, taking the necklace and snapping it off your neck with a harsh glare in the sniper’s direction; another look that had never been sent directly at him from you, but one that he found made his heart break.

“Fuck you, Crosshair.”

MEMORY SUCCESSFULLY ERASED.

The sense of overwhelming dread that filled your chest and sank down into your belly had you jolting awake, eyes darting around the mundane white room as the panic of what’s happening begins to set in.

The heart monitor picks up its speed, and the two nurses rush to your side as your hand shoots up to grab and fidget with your necklace. You’d fixed it from when… when… 

Why did it need to be fixed? Who broke it?

Who gave it to me? What was his name? Cross…

The nurse grabs your shoulder as your throat tightens with your hands grip on the jewelry, “Can I keep this one? Please?” You sob, managing to smile through tears at the nurse to your right, “Please let me keep this one.” 

‘Crosshair!’ You think, another sob scratching it’s way out of your throat. ‘What am I doing?’

The nurse glances to her coworker and nods gently. She comes to rest her hand over yours, and you let the necklace fall against your chest, but you rest a hand over it protectively. If you couldn’t save your memories of him, maybe this could be the one thing that you do save.

MEMORY WIPE RESUMED.

You can feel yourself being jolted around before finally landing in another memory, your head resting on a warm, firm shoulder and your hand gripped in a strong one in your lap. The person you’re resting your head on… they sit up, and hand you a box which reveals a necklace that relates to your namesake. 

You grin, but the figure in front you shifts which causes you to look up.

Hunter.

He’s smiling at you softly, they way he almost always had; save for the first time he met you. You grin back to him, leaning forward on the couch from your kneeling postition to wrap your arms around his shoulders.

He returns your embrace without hesitation, and you allow yourself to feel how perfectly the both of your bodies meld together. The warmth of his body under the civvy clothes you held for him in your personal dormitories on Kamino sank under your own, causing you to pull away. 

You barely notice how the room around you starts to shift, any objects affiliated with C4!@#??? begin to disappear, whatever holds your mind in it’s grasp seems determined to keep your attention on the sergeant sitting before you on the couch when you pull back from the hug.

‘Hunter gave it to me…’ You look up at him and smile lovingly, ‘of course he did,’ before leaning over and slotting your mouth over his.

MEMORY WIPE OF ??? COMPLETE.

The nurses gently help you up out of the chair, removing the device from your temples as the doctor comes to greet you. Another nurse holding a box hauls it out of the room as you shake the doctors hand and thank him profusely, grinning at the light and happy feeling on your chest as you turn to embrace the nurses in thanks. The woman at the front desk hands you an envelope of slips to give to your family and friends, and you thank her on the way out.

After leaving the office, you enter the outside of Pabu to find Omega waiting for you. Grinning you sneak up behind her, lifting her up and spinning her around. She shouts your name, but you can hear the smile in her voice as you set her down.

“How are you feeling?” She checks you over, and you smile dotingly down at her. 

“I’m alright,” You ruffle through your bag, the feeling of the necklace against your chest making you feel giddy. ‘Why did I feel so bad about it before?’ You think, but quickly shake it off and pull out the envelope. “The secretary said to give this to family and friends, but I don’t think I’m supposed to see.”

Omega curiously takes the large orange envelope from your hands, opening it and reaching in to find a ticket that said that you had:

‘Y/N L/N has erased Crosshair (CT-9904) from her memory. Please never mention their relationship to her again.’

Omega glances up to where you’re walking off with an arm looped through Hunter’s and feels a sense of dread fall to the pit of her stomach.

[hackedmotionsensors]

lol i've complained about this a fair amount on twitter but I got a comment last night? that made me think about this again.

And its ...getting weird comments that I cannot tell if they're being RUDE or there's a language barrier or some combination of both.

I finished a standee art last night and posted it and this morning I get a reply from someone who's replied very confusingly before...."You're tired and need to go to sleep"

Which LMAO wasn't entirely untrue but that was the whole comment on the art.

Not to put this person on blast and obviously do not go bother them if you know where the comment is at.....

But like what the hell does that mean? I F E E L like this is a translation error or a miscommunication. But thats the ENTIRE problem. THAT IS THE ENTIRE PROBLEM. I'm tired of getting comments that are CONFUSING to me AT BEST...and more often just fucking rude.

Like....its weird. Bc i've been on the internet for close to 3 decades now??? Lol I'm so old. But.....I've been more confused in the past year or so with how people talk to perfect strangers on the internet. I think it might be a generational thing but like LMAO ARE THE "KIDS THESE DAYS" just ......fucking RUDE??? Like I've heard pre-teens and teens talk to each other and its pretty mean but so were a lot of kids when I was a teen. So maybe its a language barrier there.

But I feel like....because everyone is so comfortable talking to perfect strangers on the internet, and getting EXTREMELY overly close? or thinking they have the right to speak to people as if we're super besties (which in turn means saying a rude backhanded compliment thats intended to be nice but just sounds mean??)...its just....so common lately for me to just be like "Why the fuck would you say this to me?"

I'm not your friend. I'm just a random artist online that draws from a fandom you probably like (or hate? Idk your life lol)

I think this whole thing STARTED with Japanese and Korean artists (and probably lots of other languages that aren't English) begging people to stop leaving horrible reaction images or people saying "I'M GONNA K*LL YOU!!!!! THIS IS DEVASTATING!!!! I'M DEAD!!!!" and the poor artist being like...okay well this is a thing I have to live with now.

And I thought we DID move past that but I feel like its back just without the reaction images bc Gen Alpha and Z thinks reaction images are cringe LMAO (small blessings)

But ....I forget which drawing I did.....It was something sad. I think it was a sad zosan?? And this person LITERALLY said they were going to hunt me down. And that wasn't the initial comment. They said something equally as rude and when I asked for clarification for what they meant they were like " I'M GONNA FIND OUT WHERE YOU LIVE"

GIRL ITS FANART OF ZORO AND SANJI!?!?!?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN

Again. I've talked about this til I'm blue in the face (fingers?? since its typing??) about this on twitter. And I've been sitting on this comment for nearly 24 hrs just....fucking confused. And I hate this ....confusion. Bc In My Day(tm) .....lol I didn't like mean comments then either but it was usually some asshole in my tumblr mail being like "YOU FUCKIN SUCK!!" lol

I might just be too stupid to interpret these quirky little comments but like

guys please if you like something. Just be normal and say "omg I love this" or like a cute reaction that is APPROPRIATE to the situation lol Don't demand things from me when I'm already giving you something that I'm doing in my free time for fun. Lol And stop asking me if there's a fic for comics or art that i TELL you came from me asdfasdfa I don't know where the fic is. I'd like to know too. (but also if I draw from a fic I link to the fic but I've decided to stop that for the time being. Any comics coming from me will be mine wholecloth for the foreseeable future)

[dailydegurechaff]

It's killing me so much I have to talk about it. Do the people know. Do they know that the men in Youjo Senki are fucking giants.

I talked abt it with a few friends on discord like last month or so, but I need to yell about it on tumblr where more people can become aware.

Using a few images as reference, I did a bunch of measurements by counting pixels using Tanya and Visha (who we have sort of canon heights for) as measuring sticks, and this is what i came up with:

the shortest of them are 6ft? why, studio nut, why

if you want an explanation for my color coding/what the asterisks mean/where the hell did i get these numbers, that's under the read more. but yeah. why are they so tall.

ok so it started upon receiving these two images from a friend (thank you Pumpkin) that give heights for Tanya and Visha

Using some reverse searching I was able to find that these two images come from a game collaboration with a game called Alice Gear Aegis. Whether or not you want to consider the info from a game collab as canon information is up to you, but to me it seems accurate, so all my estimates are based on this data.

Another friend (thank you Luna) provided me these two images that I could use as reference to make some pixel measurements. While the first is a a cleaner looking image, I opted to use the second because it included Lergen, Rudersdorf, Zettour & Anson. I don't really care about the background 203rd members (sorry.)

So I cleaned the image up to get all the lines roughly straight and made them easier to see with some color coding. This is where the color coding on my excel sheet above comes from. This is also the image I used for my pixel counts.

And from here I calculated some ratios. This is where a few discrepancies come into play. So on my excel sheet above I listed that depending on whether you use Tanya or Visha as a measuring stick, you'll get a variance of roughly 10cm/4inches. This is because they're technically not perfectly aligned to one another.

For Tanya shes 140cm tall and 281 pixels. That means 1 pixel is roughly equal to 2.0071cm. When we apply that ratio to Visha though, we should expect her to come out to roughly 321 pixels (160cm * 2.0071). She's 339 pixels though, which would be ~168cm (339px / 2.0071). But we know that's incorrect.

The inverse applies as well. Using Visha (339pixels & 160cm) as a measure, that would make 1 pixel equal to 2.1188cm. That means Tanya is expected to be roughly 297pixels (140cm * 2.1188). In the image Tanya is actually 281 pixels, which would make her ~132cm (281px / 2.1188). Which we also know is incorrect.

This is a weird discrepancy I'm not sure how to account for, so I just said fuck it and went with both options. I set up my Excel sheet to include columns for using both Tanya & Visha as a reference to provide two different estimates, you can choose which you think is more canon.

Personally I prefer to use the measurements calculated using Visha as reference because a 210cm/6'10" Lergen is offensive to my sensibilities. To put it into perspective, I measured the door to my bedroom as 198cm/6'6". I refuse to accept this man being taller than my door.

Ok finally the asterisks:

* Why the note on Koenig? On the image, it's a bit blurry but it looks as though Koenig & Lergen are aligned to the same (pink) line. But when I look at it closely, it really does look to me that Koenig is maybe 1 or 2 pixels shorter than the line. Granted that's not a lot, but there is a small difference so idk.

** Why the note on Anson? In the image, it kind of looks like he's hunched over/leaning down a bit, he's not standing perfectly straight. While he is aligned with Rudersdorf (Green) it could be he's actually a little taller if he stands straight.

[awesomefringey]

Here is a receipt from summer 2021

"I was spending my summer holidays with a few cousins at one of their family bungalows in Ireland. And the outskirts of this county I was in, is known for alot of celebs having their holiday homes.

Two of my cousins are golf enthusiasts and they have a membership in the nearby golf center. Its one of those boujee clubs that has golf but also other amenities. Almost like a leisure club yk. If you are a member, you get free food, drinks, you can use the gym, they even have a spa. Truly heavenly. They give 3 type of memberships: silver, gold and platinum. The names are self explanatory. My brothers had the gold one.

They offered me to join them for my last week there. And i have no interest in golf whatsoever so i just chilled and roamed around while they were golfing. My first two days there went without a hitch. Such a great aura. I enjoyed myself. But the next day, they had closed a section of the golf course where my brothers usually liked to golf. And they were a bit upset about it. They talked to the manager and they were told that a vip member(with platinum membership) was there who specifically asked to close that section for an hour and a half. They then gave my brothers a spot nearby as to not upset them further. I was in the viewers section above just watching my brothers golf, when I glanced towards the closed off area. I was shocked for a sec because I was sure that it was Harry but I was like there is no chance he is here. As the time went on, in the next 10 mins I was sure it was harry. Then this caddie I had become friends with came to the bleacher and I asked him about H and he told me that harry had a booking for for 3 days this week. Has been coming here with some of his friends. I was so star struck but like it also made me so happy and giddy. I observed him for a while and this caddie then told me in all the golf terminology that he was quite a decent golfer.

We returned back the next day, they weren't there. We went there the day after, and harry started golfing when my brothers were almost finishing but that day harry and louis were both on the golf course with 2 other guys who I assume were the same guys louis was chilling with. Louis was looking at Harry golfing. And oh god, it looked so domestic even from afar. At one point louis said something and they all laughed. Harry too laughed with his head thrown back. I watched them for 10-15 mins and I saw harry glance up at Louis like 5 times in that time span. They maybe just hanging out as friends tbh. But just seeing them together made me so happy.

Sorry for such a long receipt, I go too much into details haha. I am submitting this to you and to a few tumblr accs today cause I feel like our fandom needs it right now and its been a while since this happened. Good day!"

Got this in my twitter submissions. Idk how true it is but like thats the case with all the receipts. Hope you're having a good one!

Aww thank you for sharing it with us, Aster. ❤️

Always take these anons with a huge grain of salt, but the image of Harry throwing his head back laughing at Louis made me smile, so I’m not mad.

Edit: Just noticed how they turned from cousins to brothers. 🤦🏼‍♀️

[codenamesazanka]

.........Did Deku ever smiled when he was 'saving' Shigaraki/Tenko?

Not just a slight upturn of the corners of the lips, but an actual smile. The smile Nana promoted; the smile All Might whenever he saved people has that Deku aspired to; the smile that Shigaraki resented because he was never saved.

(We never see Shigaraki/Tenko smile big either, despite that being Nana's wish for Kotarou - a life full of smiles and joy, and presumably wants for her grandson too now that she sort of reconcile with him)

(the League all smiled)

It's not a certain thing - iirc, the Todoroki Save didn't have smiles either, and neither did the heteromorphs - but for Shigaraki and Deku, who had connections to All Might and Nana, it would be weird for them not to smile?

Perhaps the saving isn't actually done?

*

(below is cope fantasy)

It would be nice for Deku to realize he didn't actually save Shigaraki/Tenko, and has to go do so. Plus like. He started out the series asking if a Quirkless person can be a Hero. When he saved Tenko's heart, he had to do so via OFAFO-vestige-landscape-whatever. When he gave a final blow to AFO and that technically help brought Shigaraki/Tenko back, he was using the last embers of OFA. He's a hero, he saved everyone, yeah, yeah. But has he done so entirely without a quirk?

Idk how that would work. How do you bring back someone who had been disintegrated without some magic power? How would he even know to go save Shigaraki/Tenko one last time if he thinks Shigaraki/Tenko is dead???

but i'm seeing these images in my head that maybe. maybe. Deku goes to visit Spinner to give him Shigaraki/Tenko's last words, and Spinner explodes on him. He basically let Shigaraki die. How could he call himself a hero when he didn't save someone. Heroes won and it really didn't change anything.

And maybe, Deku is shaken by that. Thinks long and hard about the lessons of the war. Maybe he goes on a walk. Comes across the Nana Hand in the wreckage. It has that microdevice that AFO put in it that let Kurogiri know where to warp to - meaning location data. Strangely, there's information there that Shigaraki/Tenko is... somewhere?

We get the Nine (movie character) ending, where it turned out Shigaraki/Tenko survived, ending up on an island somewhere. How??? idk. regeneration kicked in again. Kurogiri actually managed to warp Shigaraki/Tenko away. Tenko's original quirk came back and it's Revival. Whatever. Point is, Shigaraki/Tenko's alive, but sees no point in going back. Like he told Spinner, Shigaraki Tomura fought till the end but he failed, so he's not Shigaraki Tomura anymore. He failed his friends. He throws Deku's words back at him - if he comes back, the sadness will only continue, so he can't go back. Who is he even, anymore? His entire life was being a puppet. He's a hollow shell.

And Deku has to save him from this. Tell him he's actually not. His friends are waiting for him. Deku's been thinking, the League has points, so he'll work to change Hero Society. He's going to college and getting a degree in social work or whatever. Hero his own way. And Shigaraki/Tenko... didn't he say he wanted to be a Hero for the Villains? He should do that. Deku tells Tenko that he can be a Hero too, smiles as he says this.

And that gives Tenko hope. And Deku has finally saved someone with a smile, using no quirk.

(And it would also be nice for Shigaraki/Tenko to get to be a Hero for the Villains and save his League. somehow. idk. Still want them to go Karma Houdini and become vigilantes.)

[leffee]

Could you rank "The Main 7 pets" from greatest to least based on their relationships with Vinnie in the show? That is, from the pet who has the best relationship with Vinnie to the pet who has the least close relationship with him.

Ok, so who has the closest relationship with Vinnie starting from the most:

Sunil - and no one's surprised. I mean they are best friends canonically and especially after season 1 they are so often shown together that it even bothers me sometimes because as much as I love those two I crave other Vinnie interactions, you know? Anyway, yeah Sunil is the closest to him, even if the little shit talks behind Vinnie's back sometimes. They're adorable together, especially when hugs and Sunil picks Vinnie up. Adorbs.

Penny - man those two are so fucking cute together can you blame me for shipping them? She is so affectionate and only with her Vinnie seems to be so comfortable when it comes to physical touch, I am not okay. All their interactions in "Two Pets for Two Pests" are absolutely golden and so cute, mostly the ones at the beginning. And also the first two names that came to Blythe's head together were Vinnie and Penny, huh? Damn, she ships them too. Actually, I need this, omw to watch those first scenes

[approximately 5 minutes later]

The progression of Vinnie jumping to her, Penny hugging him and then them so naturally changing their position to holding hands??? I am so normal about them. Don't even get me started on their interactions in the episode when they thought Penny was in the day camp for the last time. They love each other, real!

3. Russell - Russell is just kinda close to everybody in similar amount, huh? But him and Vinnie sure have their moments together, it mostly includes all the boys' moments so Sunil too they're three often shown doing things together and being kinda apart from the girls in certain episodes. Plus the moments when Russell is just like "Vinnie u stupid lemme explain cause I'm smarter-" or something like that :). Mostly the three boys together moments are here though.

4. Pepper - hmm, they are still pretty close I would say and to me at least Pepper in the most similar to Vinnie personality-wise, no, not Minka, Pepper. They are both just little shits together and I think that's great :). But she does bully him and hits him with that rubber chicken so idk about all that now. Still, she was the one who hugged him after he returned when being lost at that dumpster plus

pls neither of them might wanna look cute but... they just are (but also look at Penny and Sunil squishing in the background naaaw).

5. Minka - surprising since they're quite similar but it's not really Minka or Vinnie's fault. They're not thaat close because of the fact that Minka is the main pet with least screentime, focus, episodes dedicated to her, etc. Seriously, she is underrated by the creators who didn't give her a lot of time. The most they got together was in this one short "OOOOMg" or however many O's and M's it had, you know what I mean. And they were great there together but that's not a lot compared to what they could have had. Probably doesn't help that as much as I like this short there is one aspect that I roll my eyes at - Vinnie's hyperactivity in this one which is like... no. To me this was so out of nowhere, I get where that image of him being like that comes from but genuinely I don't think he ever did anything to be seen as hyperactive especially when compred to others. Idk, maybe it's just me cause lots of people seemed to be completely fine and even happy with that but I just don't see it, he's nowhere near as energetic as he was presented in this short. Anyway, his and Minka's interactions were still great.

6. Zoe - really they have barely any interactions as in with just them two. The most we got was in "Big Feathered Parade" and that's about it, perhaps that's the reason why those two together are my guilty pleasure so to the end Zoe goes. They would have such a girl-failure and girl-boss relationship I just know it and i crave it.

[readthephible]

i've seen people talk about shaymien drifting apart and missing their dynamic- since i know you love them both dearly, what are your thoughts on this?

oh dear anon, idk if you know what you’ve signed up for letting me ramble about them. hiding this under a cut bc it will probably be very long and also like tw speculation

so i’m basically rewording what i sent in an emotional, pms-infused series of messages to my bestie arrow @feral-teeth. i have been making connections and conclusions in my head where i’m having to step back and realizing they’re so parasocial, but i think i just emotionally connect to both shayne and damien so much that it “all” has a deeper meaning to me. keep in mind that this all just thoughts i’ve had as a viewer, it’s not me trying to say that any of this is factual or encouraging anyone to pry. don’t do that please (i, avery smoshpvnk, do not endorse the act of harassing real people with my speculative thoughts of them)

my over-emotional Shaymien Thoughts™️ have progressed with my obsession, mainly looking at the wavelengths over the course of their friendship how they’ve been close, then a little more distant, close, then a little more distant. i don’t have a set in stone timeline for it ofc, especially compared to like dan and phil where we have very solid chronological factors to make sense of things, but a rough outline: so random, they become best friends. they eventually become roommates for a little while. damien moves in with an ex and they drift for a bit while shayne gets miscellaneous roles and eventually books with smosh. shayne opens the door for damien at smosh.

from the get go they’re already a solid duo like in show with no name episodes, we see them closer with the damien and shayne show - so many good moments!!!, smosh pit weekly, then into the mythical era still with a good dynamic like in tntls and stuff. eventually we get hacking off mini series (iconic and under appreciated) that starts in 2019. then they seem to still have a good, standout dynamic through the pandemic videos. hacking off comes back for a bit about 2021. there’s also some GREAT moments from like twitch / heavy baf era (basically the time when saige is there) about them seeming really close, chaotic, having fun (ex. quelf, uno, game of life) there was also a stream damien did (12/14/21) where shayne came to his apartment (that i didn’t know about until recently??? i would die for the vod)

we get closer to the renaissance aka anthony’s back era with stuff like baf legacy series (where damien is touchy with shayne as expected, and also i know at the end of the series he is proud of everyone for the commitment and character work but the way he looks at shayne, kill me) ⬇️

[Image ID: baf legacy betrayal set. the main focus is damien in the middle dressed as mr. grub, smiling up at shayne who is standing to the right of the image and posing with a katana as the chosen. angela is on the left, jaw dropped. End ID]

then, the damien and shayne show revival! that’s where damien unintentionally clears up their timeline in a sense, and it’s cute how he gives a sappy monologue about him and shayne’s friendship. it’s really sweet even though damien did make a joke at the end to deflect from it.

i watched the video when it released, and admittedly i haven’t been a recent (as in last 5 years) smosh watcher since about august, but after this, i have just noticed a bit more of a decline in “joint content” with them. the space in which we have had videos with them together since then and especially this year has been admittedly lengthy. i have respect for my fellow rarepair shippers like how we all experienced the spommy drought, but i feel like with shaymien we have an extensive history of “canon” content rather than more consistent, current content, compared to like ianthony for example where we get to see their dynamic all the time. or anyone + the frequent cast members like shayne, ian, courtney. (i don’t really count shour/tney as a ship bc it’s real and like, not to be touched how i see it. but you do you.) even the ones we’ve got, they haven’t been seated together. (except for smosh mouth, but like, that’s the guest chair.)

could this be because damien is just busy outside of smosh? of course it could. in streams and through social media posts, you can see/tell/hear that he has been traveling, auditioning and working a LOT. i feel like with smosh videos though, besides maybe through the delay of sword af, there wasn’t a huge, monumental difference that oh, damien isn’t in videos as much. like it seems a bit more balanced i guess or less noticeable. but also, shayne has been in a ton of videos this year already, so why haven’t they been casted together with how frequently we see them in videos normally??

we get the we found our so random scripts smosh mouth episode. hallelujah shaymien is reborn. right?

idk, this could be me just totally misinterpreting, but i feel like ever since about the “decline” after the d&s show returns video, i feel like there’s a bit of a disconnect. and now this is me being incredibly parasocial and self projecting, but because i relate to damien so much, i can kind of tell that he is the kind of friend that puts in the majority of the work when it comes to upholding a relationship. is this true for all of his relationships? i have no fucking clue. but it’s something i’ve noticed with shaymien specifically. how they just don’t interact the same or bounce off each other as much as they used to.

i got a comment on one of my compilations that started more of a spiral for me:

[image ID: A YouTube comment saying “The fact that Damien wasn't at Shayne's wedding can be something so shocking and sad to me personally.”End ID]

is this true? who knows, i’m not gonna try to look into it too much, but from what i’ve seen, it makes sense. extremely speculative: surely we would have gotten photos? unless it was actually really small and limited, but why would shelby young post about it then? same with renfaire. you’re telling me they both went but didn’t even meet up?

anyway, it breaks my heart. not just in a shipper sense. at the end of the day, i really just want what’s best for them, i love their friendship and i can admire a relationship being only platonic but so strong. i have a thing for duos and always have because my lack of having a best friend throughout my life. anyway

from what i’ve seen as a viewer: you can tell damien ADORES shayne. ofc in our little alternate universes we take it a step further for fictional fantasy fun purposes, but on camera, you can tell he loves shayne so much. they both have seemingly gone through some rough shit, been very vulnerable, and grew up from being 20 and 21 together - so young and figuring out the world. i believe damien’s dad died around the so random time, and being a young adult moving to la to become an actor, mental health, neurodivergence and therapy, weight issues (me coded!! damien is me!!), relationships, etc. and through 13 years, shayne has been a constant.

you can tell how grateful damien is that shayne has been there, proud of how far he’s come, and what they’ve done together. (again, he kind of summarizes it in the d&s show revival.)

how can you tell?

1.) because of how he looks at shayne when shayne isn’t looking back. the way damien looks at shayne in the smosh mouth episode makes me want to BAWL.

the heart eyes haas is INTENSE. it’s just so tender, loving, sappy, sentimental and sweet—the intimacy of getting to be nostalgic with someone about a very niche, specific time of your life is such a concept to me. only damien and shayne know what it was like to constantly be asked “where’s demi?” then have that moved to “where’s anthony?” from so random to smosh. only they (okay, and maybe some other so random cast members) know what it was like to be a “special guest” for all the episodes and never have a solidified position on a goddamn disney channel show, or what the on set pranks were like, or who the makeup artist was that made you look dead.

damien is the one to mention the “metaphysical soulmate radar”. damien is the one to say it was their big break, just not in the way they thought “for friendship and good connections”. if you are Unwell like me about them, there is still the lowkey amanda playing the third wheel bc they’ve known each other for so long dynamic, but it’s different compared to like, bad 2 sentence horror stories.

2.) how he makes references and talks about shayne when he isn’t even there (recently, jackbox video with smosh theme where he did shayne’s bananas on monday joke). a semi recent stream where a character’s name was shane and he said there was no correlation and got all 🥰 (https://www.tumblr.com/queenofcaradelle/741683580962521088/hellers-brothers)

and this:

[Image ID: A tweet from Trevor saying “shayne blocked me” with a meme image of baby Peter Griffin. Damien’s reply: “The hell did you do? I’ve been antagonizing him for 13 years, and never got so much as a shady subtweet.” End ID]

no one asked bro /lh

3.) scroll back on damien’s instagram a bit and see how much shayne appears. here’s a link: https://www.tumblr.com/smoshpvnk/735024614400524288 but to summarize that post it is THIRTY. PHOTOS. where the focus is just the two of them. the vidcon post from last year where damien shared the text exchange “WE are awful 😌”.

AND DAMIEN’S POST ABOUT SHAYNE’S FUCKING BIRTHDAY. HELLO???

also, i stalked damien’s instagram (not promoting to do that, but i did it) and he is a very, like, proud and happy lover of people! like he wants to shout about them from rooftops! i wasn’t in this fandom for saige era, and damien has deleted those public photos from his instagram, but the photos come up on pinterest for me - they’re very cute, sweet and proud.

(took out the @ name of his ex - not about saige bc of date)

4.) even how he touches shayne: damien is a VERY touchy feely person and usually ghosts his hands or gives very light touches to others, but with shayne, it’s a full grab, it’s a grip on the shoulder, it’s an initiated hug. it’s “heart of the cards” with a bro handshake that shayne thinks is gonna be a high five but damien holds his hand and forces it still. even when he knows a touch wouldn’t necessarily be appropriate, with shayne, damien’s inner thoughts just seem to win so he ghosts it (ex. hacking off where shayne has oreo on his mouth and damien pretends like he’s gonna wipe it off)

— end of examples

damien just loves him so hard and so genuinely. and again, this is only speculation, but especially as of lately, it does not seem that shayne reciprocates that much admiration.

i know exactly how it feels to be damien. to need a person in your life that you can be 100% yourself with, without holding yourself back, because otherwise you feel like you’re going crazy. how you can love and appreciate someone so much it becomes obsessive. that person, that relationship, becomes a core part of your identity. how even if it’s not necessarily romantic, you can develop strong crushes on people that feel so intense and overbearing. how you want to spend so much time with them, envision the two of you becoming so close, jealousy making you really hard on yourself.

i know, and maybe damien does too, what it’s like to be the one who gives 75% in the relationship when the other person is giving 25%. the 75% person is trying so hard to keep it alive when it doesn’t seem like the other one is giving the same amount of effort, and disappointingly, unceremoniously, and ultimately — it fades away or crashes and burns.

i feel like the smosh mouth episode, as beautiful as it is, is a great example. how there is some good back and forth between them, but i feel like it’s heavily dependent on only so random nostalgia, which is great, but it’s not a lot of new information. we know they became friends from being on so random. it’s like finding one common thing you and a coworker have and being forced to work together on it to produce a result. again, i love that episode, i watched it the second it came out and blocked the world out to watch it. and maybe i need to watch it back to squash the little voice in the back of my head saying their dynamic is different now, or maybe i need to watch it again to make that voice louder, or maybe i shouldn’t even touch it bc it will break my heart to analyze.

ofc this is only based on what we see. maybe shayne just isn’t a pda person at all (not just touch, i mean other methods too like the 5 love languages. see: my edit of shaymien x everything i know about love by laufey) or damien’s is so strong it makes his look like nothing (again about the 75/25 though.)

maybe their friendship is absolutely blossoming privately and we don’t see it. maybe they will drift apart for a bit but come back together in an amazing way. maybe their friendship is so strong that it can overcome a (presumed) not speaking period like ianthony. or maybe it isn’t. maybe their friendship isn't as strong anymore because of them being busy with other things, or being on different walks of life (ex. shayne just got married which is presumably taking up a lot of time)

i don't mean that to negate any of damien's accomplishments ofc like boi is successful, but it must be hard in a way to have your best friend hitting such a huge milestone when you're just... with 2 cats. not getting to be with him as much anymore. drifting away from a relationship you thought would last forever. stuck caring so much more than the other person does. understanding that life must go on and so do people but it’s a sad event.

i know that, for me, staying busy and forcibly mindful and in the moment/present (working WAY too much) where you don't even have a choice to stop and think and be in your head sometimes just numbs it and makes you forget, and damien has seemed so busy lately. i’m glad he said in his tuesday 4/23 stream that he plans on taking a break soon and that it doesn’t feel bad to be busy. he’s an adult, he can handle his own life, i’m not trying to baby him.

also, i don’t mean to blame shayne or anyone else for my (admittedly silly) little perceptions of some guys from a youtube channel i love. this is, again, all entirely speculative.

my heart hurts thinking about the potential of them not being best friends anymore, of the lack of content we have seen with both of them recently, of my own perception of how much shayne means to damien. don’t listen to mitski (especially francis forever) and think about shaymien at the same time. but if you do, you better meet me in my dms. don’t think about how we’ve gotten, what, 4 videos with them both this year and it’s already almost may. don’t think about how we haven’t seen anything from shayne to damien lately and how it’s all been damien /about/ shayne, mostly indirectly.

who knows what’s going on. but either way, shayne is a big part of damien’s life. thanks for letting me get on my shaymien soapbox 🫡

[xerith-42]

That AU where Aphmau Blows up

Shout out to @thornsofrustandash for the idea. This just came to me like a prophetic vision.

Okay so I usually change Aphmau's name because I hate calling her that, but I have warmed up to just shortening it because Aph is a really cute nickname and it's more accessible to people who can't be bothered to keep track of the 5th Aphmau rename they've read this weak.

This post is me pushing my garrancemau propaganda so if you aren't down with that, idk what to tell you you just don't have taste /j

If you're reading this, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I know this isn't what we wanted, I know I'm supposed to be better than this. I was once a lord, I should know the responsibility that comes with it, and I shouldn't be so selfish.

But I need to think for myself. Have I not earned the right to selfishness after all those years of sacrificing myself for others? That's why I have to do this. I'm sorry.

Aaron, I need you to look after Lilith. I know she's going to miss me, but you're a great father and you have plenty of people who will help you with whatever you need so long as you ask for it. That's what I've always tried to tell you, and I'll keep telling you from the great beyond if I have to.

To my guards and friends, I'll miss you dearly. I wish we could share one last celebration with one another, but after this, there will be plenty of reason for celebration. Please don't let the tragedy of my death outweigh the triumph of my accomplishments. Remember me fondly, keep love in your hearts, and go forward knowing that you are some of the best companions a woman could ask for.

And to my head guards... [There's a noticeable teardrop staining the page and causing some of the ink to bleed] I'm sorry. For everything.

Goodbye.

Aph

A tear slipped down her face again, one that Aph was quickly wiping away as she folded up the letter and left it on her bedside table. She glanced over at her bed, where Lilith was swaddled up in a blanket and snuggling her favorite doll, one Laurance had carved for her. Aph's heart dropped at the image, the final thing that would make her doubt what she was about to do.

She had to remind herself that it wasn't a guarantee it would kill her. Only a possibility. She could hear Zoey rightly correct her that it was a high possibility, but she had to do this. Aph walked over to her daughter, placed a final kiss on her forehead, and then left her home. The Phoenix Alliance was quiet. It usually was, but somehow it felt even emptier under the light of the full moon. As if they're city was as abandoned as the one they had found on the island.

Her eyes kept catching on the sings of life. A guitar leaned up against a stand, the sound of cows snoring in their pens, and the many clothes strung along the drying racks reminded her that they lived here. They were making a home here. Aph had a home. The relic fragment pulled at her, reminder her that she had to protect her home. She had to. She couldn't stand seeing that sad look in Vylad's eyes anymore.

She nearly sprinted past Lucinda's house after traveling through the portal. She couldn't let anyone find her. They might be able to talk her out of this. Luckily she knew the path like the back of her hand. The forests of Phoenix Drop had changed quite a lot over 15 years, and yet they were exactly as Aph had remembered them.

The fragment in her pocket started to pull at her further and further, as if responding to the magic around the closed portal. Aph pulled the piece out, turning over the small purple orb in her hands.

"Take me to him," She commanded, and a burst of light instantly went off, magic springing from the fragment and latching onto the frame of the portal. It flashed red, and the portal was open. She could almost see him. Aph reached her hand through, and when she did, she could instantly feel the heavy blue fabric she knew so well. "Garroth!"

Aph pulled, yanking him out of the dimension and to the floor, where he was instantly followed by Zane who now stood before her. The relic fragment in her hand continued to spark with magic even as she tried to close the portal. Both Garroth and Zane needed a moment to readjust to being in the overworld. It was Zane who took less time, who realized where he was, and who he was in front of.

Bright white angel wings filled Garroth's vision as he looked up at the lord he loved so dearly.

"A-Aph?" Garroth muttered out. "What are you doing?"

"Saving your life," She answered, a smile evident in her voice. Though it faintly echoed with an unfamiliar sound, overlapping with the voice of another. "I'm sorry I couldn't do it before!"

"Wait!" Her hand shot forward, reaching straight for Zane's chest as she held onto the fragment even tighter, trying to hone and focus all the stray magic that was jumping from it.

"W-What are you doing?!" Zane gasped out as he saw her eyes start to glow white. "YOU'LL KILL US BOTH!!" Finally, she had clarity. Zane had put it so well. In order to succeed, she had to kill them both. A relic for a relic, a life for a life.

"That's the plan." Aph turned around and looked down at Garroth, her eyes becoming amber for this final moment. "I love you." A blinding white light filled her eyes, and an explosion rang out across the land.

"What happened?!" Dante nearly screamed as he raced to the explosion site. He prayed that Alexis would find no refugees were harmed, but all thoughts were swept from his mind when he got a clear view of the crater where the forest once was. Black and purple essence was scattered across the destroyed land, some parts were still actively on fire, and near the edge of the crater was Garroth. "Garroth?!"

Dante didn't get a reply. Garroth was still in shock, his hands trembling, and his eyes trying to cry. He was trying, but all he could seem to do was shake.

"Garroth, what happened?" Dante's voice sounded far, like he was talking to someone else. Garroth fell to his knees as he saw what laid at his feet where she once stood. A leather bound notebook with a rather crude "Aph" carved into the front of it. It was worn, clearly loved, and when Garroth traced his fingers over the poor thing like it would break, he could almost feel her life force coming from the pages.

It should have been louder. Garroth should have been filled with anger, something violent, something heard. Instead, the moment he held her diary in his hands, Garroth broke out into the sort of weeping he hadn't allowed since he was a child. Since the last time he lost someone this important to him. Garroth's crying was quiet. His tears were plentiful, but the sound was reserved, only a few sobs escaping between gasps for breath.

"Dante!" Travis called out, only seeing the backs of the two men. "Dante, what's going--" He stopped short when Dante turned around and he saw the tears streaming down his face. It made both men freeze at the sudden display of emotion. "What... What happened?" Dante glanced back at the weeping Garroth, and opted to step away and bring the conversation somewhere he couldn't hear.

"I-I don't really have any details yet. Garroth's not exactly comprehensible right now," Dante explained with a shaky voice. Travis faintly wanted to hold his shaking hands, just to console him a little. "Seems like nobody else was harmed in the explosion... Except..."

"Except...?" Travis repeated.

"A-Aph. I'm pretty sure she was the uh... The cause." Travis could hear his heart beating in his head as the entire world came out of focus. He couldn't really process what Dante said at first, and when he did, he felt numb. Like he should have some big reaction to the information, but instead it just left him feeling cold. "I-I'm going to keep looking around, see if I can't find a sign that she's alive."

"Yeah, y-you should do that. I'm... Enki help me, I don't know what I'm going to do."

"You could help me." Travis didn't have the heart to tell Dante his effort would be fruitless. It's not like Dante would listen anyways.

"I think I'm going to go tell the others." Dante nodded, before walking back towards the site. Travis' body moved without his own will, his legs suddenly having a mind of their own. His head felt heavy and yet also weightless, and he felt dizzy. Things only came into clarity for a moment when he saw Katelyn limping down the path through Phoenix Drop towards him.

That was when Travis got a hold of himself again, and he was suddenly racing towards her, catching Katelyn's weak form in his arms like it was instinct.

"Katelyn? What are you doing out of bed?!" Travis almost yelled.

"Like I was gonna sit still after hearing that," Katelyn groaned as she leaned against his weight. Travis' arm wrapped around her waist to hold her up like it was nothing. "What happened?"

"Still figuring that out."

"Where's Aph? I-Is she safe?" Travis's heart dropped, and he could feel the beginning of tears.

"I-I don't know."

"You don't know what?! Where she is or if she's safe?! You're her guard you should--" Katelyn stopped her yelling when she saw the tear finally slip down Travis' cheek. "No, no, no. Don't--"

"I-I'm sorry, Katelyn."

"No! She can't be!!" Katelyn was suddenly fighting against Travis, trying to break free from the grip he had on her waist. Instead, it just turned into Travis pulling her in even closer, wrapping both his arms around her tightly as Katelyn began to wail. The sound of her agony was enough to finally push those stubborn tears from Travis' eyes as e clung onto her.

They barely noticed the figure rush past them. His vision was somehow hazier than usual with the added tears in his eyes. It was when he stumbled into the crater and saw the man standing before him that the whirlwind of emotions quieted down, and Laurance was able to hear his own thoughts, feel his body again.

Mere moments before he felt an unholy amount of pain, a miserable feeling of mourning consumed every part of his body, and when he saw what remained he realized why. He saw Garroth's absolutely pitiful expression as he clutched onto her diary like a lifeline. Laurance's mind was quiet at first. Just him. Just the realization of all he had lost in a single moment. And all he was now able to lose.

Finally there was a sound to rival the explosion, a single noise to encapsulate the grief. A miserable scream that cracked and broke as it continued to tear through the land as Laurance came to terms with everything he had lost, and everything he was about to lose. The poor man could only fall to his knees and scream as it all came crashing down on him. A cacophony of voices filled his ears, only making it worse as tears forced their way through glassy eyes.

The voices of the calling were the same, yet because they called for something new, none of them sounded right. Nothing was right. Laurance's body felt like it was being ripped apart all over again and it didn't even matter this time because she was gone. He had failed her and possibly doomed everyone because of it. Every time Laurance tried to focus on the anguish of her loss, it was always weighed down by the agony of his own curse. The curse he bore for her sake was now meaningless.

Eventually Laurance's voice went hoarse. It was only then that he finally looked up and saw Garroth. The man he had spent so long fighting to get back, the man who he was ready to rip apart the realm barrier for, the man who was so loved he had more than one person willing to do that. Adoration and love swelled in Laurance for a moment, and emotion got the better of him. Laurance threw himself into Garroth's arms, and Garroth caught him and held him like it was the easiest thing in the world. He held Laurance's sobbing form and continued to weep himself.

Neither knew how to feel about the few tears of joy they initially shed while holding each other. They didn't last very long, and were rather quickly overshadowed by mourning. Garroth managed to stand up and walk the two of them away from the crater, before he collapsed against a tree and allowed his body to finally relax.

Neither Laurance or Garroth spoke for quite some time. It was just the two of them and her diary. At some point Garroth must have decided he'd had enough of wearing the heavy armor, but he never set Laurance down. Even as they walked through the streets of an empty Phoenix Drop that Garroth wanted nothing more than to explore. He'd need time to adjust to their new world, he knew that, but he always dreamed he'd do it hand in hand with the people he cared most about. He never imagined it would be him and Laurance stumbling into Aph's empty home at the top of the hill, and then collapsing before they could get to their own bed.

Now Garroth lay on the floor, Laurance still on top of him, and both of them seemingly run out of tears. That wouldn't last long.

"We should at least get to bed," Garroth suggested quietly. He was met with the sound of Laurance's sniffles.

"I can't," Laurance answered.

"Why not?" Laurance sat up, finally getting off of Garroth and letting him sit up. Laurance tried in vain to wipe his eyes, knowing it likely wouldn't do anything.

"I-I can't. I can't be around you for much longer."

"Why? What's wrong?" Laurance's body began to tremble. His blood ran hot. If his voice weren't already so hoarse, Laurance might have screamed. No no no this couldn't be real-- "Laurance, please talk to me."

"I can't!" Laurance backed away from Garroth, but refusing to move too much. He wasn't sure if he moved if he would have control of his body. He couldn't take the risk. "Calling!" That's all Garroth needed to hear.

The calling. He'd helped Laurance with it before, and Aph had told him how it was harming Laurance. Neither knew too many specifics unless Laurance disclosed them, but Garroth did know exactly what he was saying. There was no doubt that Dante's effort to find her was meaningless. She was dead and Laurance knew the second it happened. And now the calling had simply switched targets.

"I..." Garroth's voice trailed off. What was he supposed to say?

Aph would know what to say.

The thought made Garroth feel like crying all over again, but he didn't dare look away from Laurance. Especially not when he saw his eyes flash red.

"I'm sorry," Laurance whispered. "I love you." And like that, he was gone. In almost an instant Laurance had stood up and taken off, faster than Garroth was capable of keeping up with.

"Laurance!!" He desperately cried out, scrambling to stand up in his heavy armor, and barely making it to their door before he realized it was hopeless. As the sun started to peek over the horizon, Garroth looked out upon an almost empty Phoenix Drop, and he couldn't contain his anguish anymore. Garroth fell to his knees in the doorway of his beloveds home, and wept for his lost lovers once more.

hi i actually have a lot more ideas about this but this post is really long and writing this au is literally hurting me so I'm gonna make another post with more stuff later okay bye