#idk what his name would be like Theodora or something

[noodl3s4dayz]

OUGHHH the gender swap brain worms r real

[yukiblob]

🧠 💀 for all your BC ocs, please :>

Let me get my list real quick 🚶🏾‍♂️

🧠- what do you like most about the oc

💀-Do your ocs have any phobias

Levi

🧠-I like everything but mostly his personality!

💀-he has entomophobia! Which is the fear of insects in general. Fun fact, he screams every time he sees a big spider

Mathew

🧠- I love the way he’s designed 😊 He’s just so huggable and so sad looking it’s adorable !!!

💀- he has anthrophobia which is the fear of people. His is minor but he does NOT like crowds or lots of people. He doesn’t even like to talk to them. He’s working on it tho👍

Ziya

🧠- I also like his design/concept. He also has rlly cool powers(that only I’ve seen) Green is a creative color and It causes me to create so many cool characters

💀- He doesn’t fear anything. It’s actually rlly hard to scare him. He doesn’t know why he’s like that 🤷🏽‍♀️

Clara

🧠-lol I barely mention her but I love her whole concept . A pink girl holding a big axe is like my favorite thing ever

💀-coulrophobia which is the fear of clowns. This happened because of a birthday party she had. One look at the hired clown and she started crying. Poor guy didn’t know what he did wrong.

Ophina

🧠- I like her eyes 👁️. Very cat like

💀-another entomophobia lol . They’re just so nasty to look at🤷🏽‍♀️

Cesar

🧠- His personality 😊 he’s just such a sweetheart bro 😭. He loves his family and would do anything for them . Fun fact out of all my ocs he gives the best hugs!!

💀-he has thanatophobia. (Fear of death so it relates to losing a loved one)After losing his first wife and seeing the decline of Mathew’s mental health he’s just been kinda of worried. He doesn’t want to lose anymore close family .

Vasilios

🧠- I love his hair. It’s such a pretty red. I love colors 😋

💀- I couldn’t find like a good official term for it but he just fears not being liked/loved. His dad doesn’t like him so he goes to his citizens for praise.(uhh fun fact they don’t like him either )

Theodora

🧠- I love her wings😆 They’re HUGE!! like bigger than Levi huge

💀- ig she would have atelophobia which is the fear of not being perfect or something. Idk she just fears not being strong enough.

Yanira

🧠- I love her energetic personality. She’s so cool y’all 😭 She always brightens up the mood of any room!!!

💀- sadly she also has thanatophobia. She lost her dad when she was young and she has gotten over it for the most part… BUT this great, amazing little guy named Mathew started to make her fear losing him🙄. (Fun fact Mathew somewhat gets worse)

Njeri

🧠- SHES STRONG 😆 and canonically super buff too 🦅

💀- she has thanatophobia. This only started again because of a small little ginger guy named Mathew. When she first met him the first thing she noticed was how depressed/ low energetic he was. She knows Cesar is trying his best with him but Mathew is just pushing him away. She’s afraid she might she him dead one day.

Dahlia

🧠- She’s a silly goober like Levi. She might not look like it but she’s funny 😋(personality)

💀- guess who also had thanatophobia. “Had” because when she got her big injury she didn’t was stressed out about dying and Leaving little levi alone. It sort of delayed her healing process but as she was getting better it slowly went away.

I’m not going to include new Gen au here I just don’t have enough ideas besides design 🚶🏾‍♂️ um but if I do this again I’ll start to include them 👍

[sugaroto]

I dont remember if I've posted this before, but I have this headcanon with Kevin and his daughter(s)

So, I know we don't really like Thea but in this headcanon she's a better person or something

And, because Thea is short for Theodora which is a greek name she's half greek (even though no greek would shortened it to Thea but anyway)

So, because of tradition, the daughters get Thea's mom greek name

I have two options

Kyriaki (nicknames: Kiki, Kiriakoula, Koula, Kiko, bonus: Iria but I've only heard that one once) etc

Or

Paraskevi (nicknames: Vicky, Voula, Vivian, Vivi(?maybe?) Evi) etc

So, my thought is, that the girl is known as Vivian Day or Kiki Day (idk pick a παρατσούκλι) and maybe one day Thea or Kevin calls them by their full name like "Paraskevi/Kyriaki Day!"

And someone, either Andrew or maybe Neil, who knows a bunch of languages, asks if the names mean something

And Thea responds "Yeah in greek it's Friday and Sunday" and Kevin is hit with the realization that his daughters are named Friday Day and Sunday Day

You know what, why not add a son into the equation and name him Mina(s)

Month Day

Second name Year

No ok I'm kidding, Year isn't a name in greek

Friday, Sunday, Month are common names though

[margalitarry]

almost together | h.s

~~~~~~~~~~~

warnings: sexual references, being intoxicated, roofing drinks, mafia!harry, jealous!harry, angst, fluff, lil mix of it all.

word count: 2.5k

note: i cant tell if i love or hate this because it’s 1am and IDK BUT ENJOY <3 also this is a y/n fic, avery marks is simply y/n’s alter ego.

masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~

you gleamed at your work partner, harry styles, as you walked into a high-class party. despite being in a little black dress, you were on a mission tonight.

you and harry styles had been working together for a little less than a year now, you would like to say you’re friends but he insists ‘work partners can’t be friends’. although harry easily gave off a dark, mysterious and almost evil aura; you knew the boy in a way many didn’t.

“our guy is sitting there at the bar in the blue blazer, brown hair. next to the douchebag.” harry whispered into your ear, putting an arm around you as he smiled at the partygoers near him.

“i can definitely get him alone, let me do my thing.” you quietly said, more than whispering being unable to reach his height.

he rolled his eyes at knowing what you wanted to do, go and seduce the target. harry won’t deny that it works amazingly well, but something always made him uncomfortable. watching you smiled aimlessly at the older men as they looked at you like candy. it pissed him off more than anything, nevertheless he never said anything.

“go right ahead then, he has the watch in his left wrist. i’ll stand over near that pillar to the right of the entrance.” harry told you, as you both went your separate ways.

you turned on your earpiece, putting on an ear cuff to blend the small equipment in easily as you walked over to the bar. the target met your eyes almost immediately, sending him an innocent yet suggestive smile. finally you approach him and his stranger.

“hi handsome, catching my eyes from across the room?” you said to the man, giving his partner a look of lust as well.

“and what’s your name young lady?” the target man asked you.

“marks, avery marks sir. and yourself? both of you?” you eagerly asked the men, trying not being obvious.

“my coworker’s name here is actually mark plath! i’m jameson valent darling. what’d you come over here to talk about?” the target man, jameson, said.

you overhear harry in your ear saying something but you couldn’t make it out. you glanced over to see him speaking with an older woman, which sent heat through your body.

“a few things, some of them just between you and i.” you suggested, putting your hand on top of his while making eye contact. you break it for a second to look at his watch, but not blatantly.

“go find theodora, plath. i need to speak to miss marks one on one i believe” he told his coworker, still looking at you the whole time.

once mark had left, jameson invited you to take his seat next to him. he offers to buy you a drink, which you’ll never say no too.

you always said yes because you knew eventually the man would try and roofie you. although they never seemed to make it that well of a secret because you always knew. tonight’s plan was a little more advanced, even for you.

harry watched you and jameson laugh and talk for about 15 minutes, the conversation hadn’t been going anywhere but you had that look and he trusted you. he watched jameson touch your hands and thighs, you only just brushing off the gesture. it was driving harry nearly insane.

“how about just one more drink sweet girl? we can discuss a few things further in private afterwards.” jameson asked, looking you up and down thinking you were the easiest women in his life.

you nodded and prepared for him to roofie your drink. you were certainly drunk at this point as jameson had kept buying shots and encouraging strong drinks. you had a fairly high tolerance though and tried to focus on your environment.

you turned you back to him to look at harry, who had been intently staring at you the whole time. you felt chills down your spine and he gave you the slightest smile and widened his gaze causing you to turn around.

“hey what is that over there? on the stage behind you?” you asked jameson.

as his body turned around, pure adrenaline bursted at your seams as you switched the drinks around. jameson having the drink you believed was roofied, and was really hoping.

“what? it’s just the band setting up?” he said, confused.

“i thought i saw something weird, i’m not sure. cheers though!” you raised your glass as did jameson, clinking them together and taking down the last whiskey shot.

“please wait for me while i go to the ladies room before we head out? i just need a moment.” you more told than asked him, leaving as he said sure.

you have harry a side eye as you made your way through the party to the bathroom doors. harry followed you into the single person bathrooms.

“i need to stall for about five minutes before we continue.” you said, slightly slurring your words as a result of the alcohol taking over your senses.

“are you okay? why do you need to stall? did he say something?” harry asked you, he had heard most of your conversation with him but nothing seemed significant.

“i switched our drinks, im almost positive he tried to roofie me. it’ll teach him a lesson and we’ll get our watch.”

harry slightly gaped at what you had said you did but started to laugh. you mindlessly smiled at him, sending a heat to his cheeks he was happy you didn’t notice.

“let’s go help him out before someone else does.” harry said, letting you exit the bathroom before he did.

you walked back to the bar and found jameson exactly in the same seat, he looked awfully sweaty in comparison to before.

“you ready to head out sir?” you asked him, only getting the slightest head nod in return from him. it was clear jameson was freaking out over his uncontrollable condition, but was doing his best to hide it.

you took his hand to help him stand as he nearly toppled you over trying to stand on his feet. you looked for harry for guidence, but he wasn’t anywhere to be seen. you immediately get anxious and stressed, but head towards the exit as quickly as you can with jameson getting worse and worse. followed with your own state not getting any better.

“i’m in the front, the car we arrived in. just get him out here and i’ll help.” you heard harry talk in your earpiece, sending the slightest relief through you.

eventually you made your exit, and harry hopped out of the drivers seat to help take the weight of jameson. he had lost almost all of his muscle control at the point and was extremely difficult to move on your own. you helped harry get him situated in the back seat before you both headed into the car yourself.

“where the fuck do we go now?” you asked harry, stressed about the man in your backseat.

“i say a random field. id love to use a warehouse but our mission wasn’t exactly to kidnap the target unfortunately.” he sarcastically replied, beginning to drive.

he opened the middle compartment to reveal one single item, a rumors by fleetwood mac cd. he popped it into the cd player and let the the tunes fill the rest of the still air in the car.

you looked over at harry driving, and he looked perfect. his once buttoned up shirt was slightly askew now, revealing parts of his chest. his hair fell perfectly, despite running his hand through it every other minute. sure harry was good looking, but usually not this much right?

“you look really pretty right now. like a disney prince almost. but even better” you drunkenly ramble, not really caring what you were saying in the moment.

“pretty hmm? don’t think i’ve heard that one before.”

“well it’s absolutely true. you looks pretty all the time to me.” you continue to spill

“you drive me crazy sometimes you know that?”harry said, his cheeks once again heating up by your words.

harry pulled into a field after about 45 minutes of driving, he told you you could stay in the car even though you insisted to help. you both got out of the car and stared at jameson, who was awake but had no idea of his surroundings. harry began to pick him up.

“are we just gonna leave him here?” you asked as harry carried the larger man out of the car, setting him on the grass.

“yeah, it’s about all we can do.”

you took the watch off of his wrist and put it into your pocket. you and harry headed back into the car and both subconsciously sighed at the same time.

“why won’t you let us be more than work partners?”

harry was taken aback by your sudden question; he had honestly forgotten the amount of times he had told you that. in reality though, harry was just scared to let you into his life like that. he understood you weren’t in a much better situation than him, but he would hate to get you wrapped up in anymore than you were already.

“because we just shouldn’t be, it’ll be better for both of us.” harry told you, going back to his defensive state anytime you brought it up.

“but you don’t know that! we’ve never just hung out, just talked. i just want to know you better.” you confessed to him.

harry slammed his hands into the steering wheel in a burst of frustration; causing you to involuntary jump at the action and unexpected sound.

“because of that! because i don’t want to hurt you and i’m scared i would.” harry said, referring to you jumping at his frustration. you both knew by this point you weren’t referring to being only friends.

“you don’t have to be scared of something that won’t happen. please just try it out harry, we can make it work.”

“why won’t you just listen to me? this, us, cannot work out. ever notice how life is fine together every other moment we don’t talk about things like this?” harry said raising his voice at you.

“then stop doing things to make me believe you want to be with me! stop staring down every person who’s spoken to me, stop speaking for me during a conversation, stop touching me in public. this is not one sided!” you shouted back at him as your eyes started to burn.

“there is absolutely nothing more i want than to be with you y/n. but i just can’t do it, it’s me.” harry sighed out, his voice cracking slightly near the end of his sentence.

“so what’s stopping you? absolutely nothing but yourself! you are the one holding yourself back from this!” you pleaded with him.

you and harry both had never felt this way for each other liked you did in that moment. although you both had been just been shouting, you never felt closer with each other. neither of you opened up before this day, there was small disagreements and disappointments but it was never like this before.

“i know i am, because you are the last person i want to get wrapped up in my shit of a life! you don’t deserve that.”

“you’re telling that to your year long partner who goes on international illegal missions with you, in exchange for money. and you think you’re the only one with a shit life? you’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.” you said, shouting near the end, you had began to sob at this point.

harry thought you looked beautiful. even with your mascara across your face and desperate look; that had both been a a result of him. he still thought you looked beautiful. his heart began to ache the longer he fully acknowledged your presence. no, you had never properly ’hung out’, but you both truly understood each other.

harry also knew you were right, he knew you didn’t have it the easiest at times and still struggle to this day. everything he had said to you; you had a counter argument that he couldn’t deny.

so even while driving, he kissed you. your faces were closer than you realized, and you immediately melted into his mouth. the kiss was extremely short, but felt like it lasted hours. he pulled back from your face first. looking at the road ahead before looking back at you, speechless.

he couldn’t tell if you were angry, happy, shocked, or anything. you had just been sitting there with you mouth slightly ajar and your lips much redder than they were earlier today.

“you should know by now i care about you, i don’t think i ever couldn’t.” harry said, taking a breath before he continued.

“the idea of hurting you stresses me out, i wouldn’t want to ever do that to you.”

you had felt every emotion at once, you couldn’t have been happier he kissed you but at the same time you were pissed off he did. no, it wasn’t fair the way it happened but you were content with him opening up in this moment.

“then you wouldn’t, you don’t have to do something you don’t want to do harry.” you softly told him.

“but i cant promise myself i wouldn’t! that’s the issue.” he said, frustrated with his emotions as well. he pulled the car into you apartment complex and put it in park.

“i won’t let you hurt me, please just let yourself open up to me.” you begged him, trying to promise him things you didn’t know were true or not.

“just come stay the night with me please?” you asked him, looking into his eyes which were saying so much but nothing.

he sighed, putting his head onto the steering wheel and letting out a slight ‘fuck me’ you just hardly could hear. you took one of his hands from underneath him and just held it, still looking at him.

he looked up at you again, and you looked exhausted. it was nearly two in the morning, and harry was more tired than he realized. his head was telling him to not go with you, to save you from himself. if it was up to his head right now, he would leave the country for you. but his heart loved you more.

“yeah sure, let’s go.” harry finally said, letting you both gain a smile on your face as you got out of the car and headed home together, for the first time.

[autisticarachnid]

What was Jacob disappearing like in your AU from his point of view? Also what was his connection to Rakepick?

It’s important to note that in my timeline (idk about the actual game’s timeline on this) jacob was expelled in late april/early may 1980 but he disappeared in august 1981, over a full year later. after he was expelled, he returned home to his parents, owyn and theodora, who were very sympathetic and caring towards him over the whole ordeal. they were definitely saddened by their son’s expulsion, but more by the fact that jacob had just lost his closest friend, and gave him the space he needed while also making sure to take care of him. still, jacob mostly either stayed in his room or snuck out of the house most of the time, both too ashamed over his expulsion and too angry over duncan’s death.

in my au, R doesn’t really have as much influence as it does in the game ? so jacob’s decision to explore the vaults was just that- entirely his own decision. jacob and duncan continuing to explore the vaults was completely their own decision, and R only noticed in their third year or so. R watched the two carefully from a distance, ultimately recruiting a then 22 year old rakepick in jacob’s fifth year to keep an eye on him when necessary. under R’s orders, she left clues that drove duncan to the potion that later ended his life. when jacob began sneaking out, he did investigate knockturn alley in secrecy a handful of times, at which point he ran into a disguised rakepick. she ultimately revealed her identity to him, and did eventually trick him into helping her by informing him of the portrait vault. jacob also knew he couldn’t go at the vault alone, and while part of him feared that his journey with the vaults would eventually also endanger his family, the urge to finish what he started was stronger. he entered the vault with only rakepick in august of 1981, and became trapped in a portrait as rakepick abandoned him there. jacob was, understandably, extremely outraged at her betrayal, but also panicked over his new situation. his youngest sister was only six, after all!! would she even remember him??

as for his time trapped in the vault, he kept himself sane by either carefully planning his revenge against rakepick or thinking deeply about his family, imagining what each of them would do over the years. since time passed differently in the vault, he had no idea what year it was. he did, at several points, nearly lose himself, and a few times wished he could just be dead rather than stuck in the mind-altering landscape of the portrait.

he could hardly even believe it when he began to hear noise from outside of the door. he could hear yelling, talking, the sounds of something heavy falling like an avalanche, and even the roar of the hungarian horntail. the noise caused him to jump up, staring expectantly until the door opened to reveal- to his complete and utter shock and disbelief- a now sixteen year old thalia.

in my au, jacob didn’t actually immediately leave upon hearing rakepick’s name. he wanted to, for a split moment, but was too overwhelmed at seeing his little sister again (and some of the half siblings he had never met before !!) that he stayed with thalia right up to when everyone was about to grab hold of the portkey again. jacob couldn’t bring himself to even dare to step foot in hogwarts again, and so promised his little sister he’d see her again very soon. and thus, as the portkey whisked everyone else away, jacob apparated to outside the bounds of the forbidden forest, and immediately began tracking rakepick down- and he vowed to never let her get away with all that she had done.

[yourdeepestfathoms]

Medusa’s Child Stuff

I got two (2) people who reblogged the story with comments and now I think everyone loves the concept so here’s some of the ideas I have for the book

The child’s name is Theodora. Medusa calls her Teddi.

She is adopted when she is ten, spends three years with Medusa before Medusa is killed, and is fourteen when she finally gets her revenge on Perseus.

Medusa was not transformed into a Gorgon by Athena. This is based on the actual real story of Medusa, and that’s that she was born a Gorgon.

Medusa cannot turn women to stone, which is why Teddi survives their first encounter. Teddi was going to be blind, but that would hinder a lot of the necessary things that needed to happen in the story, like all the visuals and stuff.

Imagine Medusa’s conflict when she can’t feed her human child live rats.

Medusa’s tail makes the BEST blanket.

Medusa was simply trying to protect Teddi when Perseus came to their island. Nobody outside the island knew about Teddi, so Perseus had no idea Medusa had a daughter. And when he does finally realize, it was too late.

When Medusa was decapitated, Chrysaor and Pegasus were born from her spilled blood, technically making them the brothers of Teddi. And when I tell you Teddi freaked the hell out when this winged horse and winged boar formed from the gore of her dead mother—

Teddi goes into a deep state of mourning after Medusa was killed. Chrysoar and Pegasus watch her worriedly as she buries Medusa’s corpse, barely strong enough to even drag it to the grave site, weakened by all her crying. Pegasus steps in and helps pull the body the rest of the way, even though he didn’t know his mother like Teddi did.

It’s strange to call a winged horse and winged boar her brothers, but Teddi is just happy to not be alone.

After two weeks of being miserable, Teddi finally decides to do something. She gets Pegasus to fly her to the mainland so she can track down Perseus and get her revenge.

“Let’s go, brothers.” “🐴👄🐴” “🐗👄🐗”

The bad news is that Perseus is a demigod. She could kill him, but it would be extremely difficult in her current state. So she enlists the help of the gods.

She tries calling out to them first, then tries praying to them, and then she goes to Olympus because she’s tired of being ignored.

Except she can’t fucking get to Olympus because Zeus sent a bug to bite Pegasus while she was flying up on his back and she nearly fell to her death.

And every time she tries again, he always finds a way to stop her.

So Teddi becomes depressed all over again and screams for HOURS at the gods at the base of Mount Olympus, calling them cruel and evil and unhelpful and awful and a bunch of other stuff.

She finally decides to just kill Perseus without their help, but while she’s walking through the woods, she meets a mysterious woman who seems very interested in her.

This woman turns out to be Artemis!! And after explaining what happened, Artemis agrees to bless Teddi for a short amount of time so she can go beat up Perseus.

Hera and Leto also decide to help, too. For fun :)

Teddi literally beats the shit out of Perseus. She is BRUTAL.

And then she has to go find Athena and get her mom’s head back, which is VERY awkward mind you.

And then she’s on her way to the Underworld!

But the blessings of the goddesses are beginning to run out and she feels the full extent of her wounds. She was stabbed, cut, gashed, bruised, and has several fractured bones. Infections were starting to set in, too.

It gets harder and harder to get up every morning, but she pushes through the agony and illness.

But she eventually makes it to the Underworld!! After sitting on a fucking boat ride and passing by a giant three-headed dog, she finally sees Hades.

And so the bargaining begins.

Teddie is so hungry and thirsty and sleep deprived and marred from the fight with Perseus, but she manages to gather the energy to beg Hades for her mother back. She just wants to see her one more time.

“Your mother...is a snake” “Yeah, and your father ate your siblings, but you don’t see me judging”

Lol jk she’d start crying

Just imagine Persephone comes in, sees the child crying, and is like, “AGAIN? Oh, hey, is that Medusa’s d—” *child cries louder*

*Hades voice* “nice”

Cerberus gives Teddi all the licks to help comfort her

Hades agrees to revive Medusa and it’s such a touching moment when mother and daughter reunite 🥺

However, Teddi was so badly wounded that she ends up bleeding out in Medusa’s arms. But Hades very subtlety revives her into a little Gorgon (or contacts someone who can do that idk I don’t know Greek mythology) because he’s not about to let this reunion be ruined by another damn death. Not on his watch.

Orpheus, watching this child talk to Hades and get her mom back without any strings attached or any walking out of he Underworld without looking at her necessary: 👁👄👁

[hyena-frog]

Hey I’m sure you’ve been asked before but what’s your opinion on the audiobooks of Red Rising? Personally I think Tim Gerard Reynolds’ narration as Darrow is what elevated the series to being my absolute favorite. As for the other narrators in IG and DA, Ephrim’s narrator really grew on me and I’m so sad Ephrim is gone. I’m glad Lyria got recast in Dark Age. I skip her chapters when I re-listen to IG. I think Lysander’s first narrator was much better. His new voice sounds 40 but he’s only 20

Sorry it took me so long to answer this! Fun fact, but you actually sent this around the same time I decided to re-read Iron Gold (via the audiobook) to help flesh out a theory post I’m drafting. So I didn’t want to answer until I’d gotten a taste of each narrator. That’s some A+ psychic premonition on your part.

Unfortunately, I’ve yet to finish the IG audiobook because of Real Life but I’ve at least heard all of the narrators, so even if I’m still not very far in, I’ll give my opinions on them.

So, confession time, Dark Age is the first Red Rising audiobook I have ever listened to, even though I've heard good things about the RR audiobooks in general. Audiobooks aren’t really my thing. But I was taking too long to read that monster of a book, so I figured listening and reading at the same time would help me finish it faster. And boy, did it!

Now, Iron Gold is the second audiobook I’m listening to... I’m going about this all backwards, it seems. So, I’m going to give my opinions on the narrators in the order I experienced them.

Dark Age —

Tim Gerard Reynolds:

The GOAT. I’ve only heard good things about his narration, including from Pierce Brown himself at both signings I’ve been to. Now that I’ve experienced it for myself, I have to agree! I’m definitely going to need to listen to the original trilogy audiobooks at some point to get more of this guy.

He made you feel every ounce of exhaustion Dark Age Darrow felt, especially in Part I, and during the finale. His rare moments of levity (Sevro’s Palace) were delivered impeccably. His character voices were enjoyable; his Rhonna was great and his Atalantia gave me the creeps. Any moment Darrow thought of Virginia made me feel the full gamut of emotions. Anytime he summoned his righteous anger and went into Reaper mode, Reynolds sucked you in with the drama of it all.

Darrow’s always been my favorite but hearing Reynold’s interpretation of Darrow’s inner narrative really elevated why he’s a fantastic character. This guy is great.

John Curless:

Honestly? If Reynolds weren’t in the picture, he’d be my #1. Calling him my second favorite narrator doesn’t do him justice. His Ephraim injected much needed comedy into this narrative. Curless balanced Ephraim’s other nuances very well too. His deep psychological issues, his continued grief over Trigg, his budding love for the kids. It was beautifully executed.

One chapter that still haunts me is when Pax forces him off the Z cold turkey. Curless nailed Ephraim going into withdrawal. He was frightening and it was great. I also loved his reunion with Volga, even if his Volga voice was jarring to me after hearing Moira Quirk’s interpretation for most of the book. On that note, his generic Obsidian accent (Scandinavian-ish) never became too annoying and he differentiated the main players pretty well (namely Ozgard and Sefi). I really liked his Sefi voice. Quiet and whispery, very Sefi.

Don’t talk to me about Ephraim’s fate, I’m still in pain. 😭 I actually liked IG Ephraim a lot, not as a person but I thought his story was interesting. But his DA development was incredible. He really grew on me, and the fact he won’t be back, meaning Curless’ amazing narration won’t be back, is devastating.

James Langdon:

I didn’t mind his Lysander too much. I mean, I hate Lysander, but I thought he did a decent job portraying him. Maybe it’s just because he was my first Lysander voice. Although, I do agree he sounds too old for the role, but then again, Reynolds sounds too old for Red Rising Darrow (16) so? -shrug-

My main complaint with this guy is that sometimes, during the height of the action, he sounds as detached as a BBC newscaster. Which is fine, when Lysander uses the Mind’s Eye, but even when he’s full on panicking, this guy sounds so levelheaded.

His character voices are... ok. The growly voice he puts on for Ajax, and little bit for Cicero, is a bit weird. His Atalantia is sensual and creepy af and I loved his Atlas voice. One chapter that stands out to me is Kalindora’s confession toward the end. Langdon blew me out of the water with that one. Kalindora was never my favorite, but he made me really feel for her in that scene.

Moira Quirk:

I love her. I think she’s great. She has a very strong voice that pulls you along the story with ease. I think Lyria has the best DA story line and Quirk’s narration only made it better. She embodied Lyria’s temperament wonderfully; the anger, the kindness, and the stubborn resolve to keep living after initially giving up.

I keep harping on about character voices but they’re important, alright? Quirk’s character voices are some of the best. Her Victra is high and mighty and I felt Lyria’s annoyance along with her. But she also did Victra’s vulnerable moments wonderfully. I LOVE Quirk’s Volga. She’s so cute! Her accent reminds me of Sypha Belnades from the Netflix Castlevania series, which is not at all correct regionally, but it’s so adorable that it is officially The Volga Voice in my mind.

Not much else to say on this one, except, I hope the next book keeps this Lyria or I will be so sad.

Rendah Heywood:

Hail Sovereign! Another amazing narrator. At first I wasn’t sure what to think because I didn’t have any headcanon for what Virginia’s voice sounds like, but Heywood’s narration quickly convinced me this is The Virginia Voice. Very classy, very calm, could kill you but chooses not to, so don’t push her, understood?

She really gets across Virgnia’s main frustration of being smarter than everyone and being right like 99.9% of the time but rarely being listened to, VERY well, without making her seem unnecessarily whiny or something. It’s just a fact that she’s smarter than everyone else and the worlds would be better place if you took her advice.

Virgnia’s always been a bit of a mystery but Heywood really makes her into a Real Person, you know? Her fun interactions with Holiday and Theodora, her devastation after the Senate upheaval, her drive to escape from her captors... Expertly portrayed.

Her character voices are pretty good. I thought her Sevro was hilarious. I’m already missing her voice in IG (since I’m reading these backwards). I’m really looking forward to her return in the next book... Virginia will still be a POV character in the next one, right Pierce? Right??

Iron Gold —

Tim Gerard Reynolds:

I’m repeating this guy only to say: Reynolds is making sure I feel every molecule of exhaustion in Darrow’s body and I’m not very far in. I’ve already read IG, and I’m just coming off DA, so I know it won’t let up but still... have mercy on me.

John Curless:

Repeating again to say, goddamn, does this guy nail Ephraim’s development between books really well. IG Ephraim is no fun at all. Barely cracked a joke yet and is still very much wallowing in grief... Curless’ narration really makes IG Ephraim bearable, tbh.

Julian Elfer:

Hmmm. I don’t know if I’d agree he’s better than James Langdon. They’re both ok to me. Elfer is certainly more age appropriate. However, he’s a bit monotone and his reading cadence is a little annoying to me. He sounds like someone reading his own writing at a book club more than a professional narrator. I don’t mean that as an insult! He’s pleasant enough to listen to but he’s not on the same level as the others imo.

Idk. I’m still not very far into the IG audiobook, so it’s not fair to compare him to Langdon without the full picture. Maybe he gets better. However so far both Lysander narrators are. OK. That said, I don’t think Elfer is atrocious enough to warrant a re-cast? I heard people complained about him and Lyria’s IG narrator and that’s why they were changed... but Elfer isn’t terrible so I’m confused on that one.

Aedin Moloney:

Oh dear. I hate to be so blunt but... I hate her narration. A lot. Coming off of Quirk’s incredible Lyria, Moloney’s performance is... jarring, to say the least. She doesn’t give Lyria the same spunk that Quirk does. Moloney’s Lyria is too out of character for me. Lyria’s life is a shitshow and her weirdly whimsical voice is way too out of place. And during the more frenetic scenes, she’s way over the top.

I guess the problem with this narrator is she gives Lyria Too Much. Lyria is a very practical, very down-to-earth person, not prone to expressing a lot of deep emotion. Quirk balanced this very well, making her inner narrative just emotional enough without contradicting her outer expression. Meanwhile, I can barely follow along with what Moloney was saying when Tiran got shot because she was So Distressed and Hysterical. Good thing I had the book open.

Again, I’m not very far in, so maybe she gets better... idk. Take my opinions on Elfer and Moloney with a grain of salt because I haven’t finished IG yet.

Thank you for the ask! I’d love to hear opinions from anyone else on the second trilogy narrators (because I think we all agree Reynolds is great).

[badlydrawndrawnings]

ATWQ Book Three Thoughts

I finally got time this week to finished reading the third ATWQ book, and I got to say, I am honestly very, very scared how this series is going to end. I am feeling a sense of dread I don’t think I got when reading ASOUE as a child. Something about this series is making me go (O.O) with a dash of 8U I had no expectations on what the hell would this third book even hold. This is honestly all over the place like seriously...

This book just got me shook.

Okay, so first all...BERTRAND WAS THEODORA’S LAST APPRENTICE? Holy **** this was one of the many things that shook me to the core.  “He’d end up married to a wonderful woman and have very charming children, while I languished alone and lonely.” Lemony Snicket you have no idea what you just foretold for your future. 

Prosper Lost really decided to tell Lemony about his family (daughter Ornette  + brothers in law?) and shows he isn’t just a nosy, sneaky and lurking in the background type of guy. He has great concerns that aren’t related to his business it goes to the whole freaking town! I get the feeling something bad happened in his past and with a fire like shoot why else is he working the Official Fire Department. I guess it has something to do with his wife (I assume since he has a daughter).

In regards to Ornette, I don’t have a true clear thought or opinion of her yet. Cleo while showing up late got talked a lot for about 2/3 of the books and an illustration that gives me some idea of her character. Ornette got mention a few times, and then shows up at Wade Academy and she’s very gung-ho; willing to work with the others and Lemony who she just met. I like she’s open minded working with a stranger like Ornette is gonna fit in well. However, I guess I have to say her first impression was weaker than Cleo’s build up so I’m just *thinking* over her still. I hope we get to see more of her in the last book though. 

Theodora really just hit me with a tone of bricks. I admit this book really made me like her more because damn it, I think I did what Theodora did once or twice in my life and it sucks. So first off: Theodora all this time knew she was rank last? God, that must mean in the previous books those fancy talks of her reputation partly must have been done to make herself feel better and have confidence and skills that isn’t really there. Since she’s rank last it means there’s a chance she’s not well respected -and maybe not well like (I assume rank is a combinations of reviews from past apprentices and peer reviews). That means Theodora puts on an act for Lemony (and Bertrand who was a lot easier for Theodora to chaperone; Bertrand what review did you gave Theodora?) and everyone else to make herself seem better and more competent. Because if others of different standings take her serious, then VFD will start taking her more serious, and ergo, others (work) associates will be all ‘yeah we can be friends 8D!’. Clearly it’s not working as plan.

Theodora latching on to Sharon and their short lived friendship (the nail polish...Theodora may not have gotten friendship bracelets but she went all out anyway, this just sad to think about). Here we have Theodora thinking she not only has a friend in who know how long -and a friend from she thought was part of VFD- but has a chance to prove herself for once from all her past mistakes and screw up. And Sharon reveal herself as a fraud and Theodora is all like ‘well ****’ and despite not liking Lemony, she still made sure Lemony sure as hell wasn’t going to be taken by Hangfire and the Inhumane Society (such is a duty of a chaperone).

But despite her low rank, Theodora just more than that. She not just a wild hair driver, and yeah, this was clearly shown since the first book if she saved Lemony from getting kidnapped. Theodora knew the whole time Lemony was going to plan something with Kit (IDK if she knew of the coup, but she knew something big was going to happen. Did she took him to SBTS so their plan would fail?). She also knows enough the plan got so off the rails Kit is in jail and Theodora was willing to help Lemony break her out. I’m not saying she’s a favorite character, but she’s in a general tier of ‘I like very much!’

The Haines family (two out three at least): I feel for Sharon, wanting her daughter Lizzie back at any cost. I can understand why she felt like she had no choice to work with Hangfire. If Hangfire got Sally Murphy to work for him (she was trying to help save Lizzie this whole time oh my god), then it’s not much of a stretch Hangfire could get the Haines as well if they’re desperate. But she dragged Kellar into it and was considering striking Kellar across the face. She was willing to go that far to get her son to continue working with Hangfire to get Lizzie back. I hope with Lizzie getting found, the family can be together again and work their issues out.

Won’t say too much on Kellar himself, in part because apparently, ‘dynamite hair’  translated into the famous Tintin quiff. Don’t get me wrong, I like Kellar. His situation sucks to the tenth level and he stood up for what he know is right, even if it means he and his mom have to temporary part ways (again, I hope the Haines family can be together again and work their issues out). I totally think he and Moxie will become very good friends (he needs friends in general). Typist buddies are a go-go! But whenever I think of him and his illustration I can’t get Tintin out of my head. Thanks, Seth.

I got a better feel of Cleo from this book, and yeah, she is totally Team Chemistry Dad, and Jake is totally Team Food Mom. They’re the team parents for all these kids and they’re doing a very good job. Cleo honestly rocks the mask with her color scheme. As to the rest of Lemony’s SBTS associates + Qwerty, nothing much change on thoughts and opinions (Lemony is still upset over Moxie’s arm 8U). I hope Qwerty in the last book gets free. I thought something bad was gonna happen to him like Dewey. I feel a bit happy Qwerty is just arrested and not dead from a harpoon gun.

Ellington, meanwhile, is getting more desperate to find her father (she has a picture of him in her music box my goodness that hurts! However, thanks to a re-watch of Netflix ASOUE, and thinking about [RETRACTED] and looking at something I wrote in a different ATWQ post, I have a very bad feeling, and I hope I’m wrong about it.) if she was more or less ‘working’ with Hangfire. Those film noir vibes are getting to real warning levels that are in the red zone and close to 100% Got to admit thought, her and Lemony’s ‘first and last date’ really ended on a damp note 8U.

I’m too scared on guessing WTF is the creature/noise Lemony and Ellington heard. And do I want to know about the honeydew melons (I like cantaloupe more TBH)?

My opinion of the Mitchum parents are the same but my goodness! Someone let them know how terrible their son is and let them know they’re failure as parents! Stew upgraded from bully to ‘part time villain’, knows it, and just got worse. I gotta bring up Carmelita again because Stew is making me think over Carmelita’s character more than I ever thought before.

I interpret Carmelita as a spoil rich brat and bully who got away with her rotten behavior due to her parents not being parents, just giving her too many gifts and not teaching her important manners. She a bit of an ill-fusion of Veruca Salt and Dudley Dursley in my opinion. Anyway, Carmelita has no idea what she got herself into in the TSS, but by TGG-TPP she is ‘okay! 8D’ because Esme while teaching her to be a ‘villain’ and other dangerous things, it’s mitigated by Esme still spoiling Carmelita rotten and keeping Carmelita’s old lifestyle she’s used too. It also help in the TAA and TSS she just used words as weapons, so this ‘jump’ was just a real shocker and showing how Carmelita while knowing of VFD, is still blind to their hidden nature if she didn’t dwell to much over it.

Stew on the other hand, is a bully who has been using force since the first book, but it’s on the low-down side. Now, Stew is willingly working with Hangfire, and he just decided to go all out and take it up a notch. And Stew unlike Carmelita, isn’t blind to what is going on. I think. It’s also possible Stew doesn’t know the major end goal of Hangfire and Stew is happy he gets to continue bullying people through any means, and his target just has to be Lemony. I honestly don’t know what’s up with him and his actions.

Speaking of Lemony...someone help this poor child mentally and physically. This is all too much for a thirteen year old (or anyone). He has to worry about Kit and save a dying town, and IDK if Theodora is even going to help in the final book if she wanted to high tail it out of there. He’s feeling more lonely than ever and Imaginary!Kit shows up again. Lemony Snicket you just jinx yourself about being lonely shouldn’t stop at age thirteen ;_; you have no idea what is in store, especially when it comes to your siblings. Lemony is closer to Kit than to Jacques, but the ‘flashback’ to playing Beethoven was sweet because the two were able to spend time together and this was like, the first time Lemony actually thought of Jacques in who know how long. Now I’m thinking about Netflix!Lemony wishing he spend more time with Jacques.

So uh...Olaf got a name drop (is guess who referring to the game? band? IDK who Q is but, this is gonna be weird with my headcanon of Mr. Quagmire), I covered Bertrand’s name drop...and Josephine cameos.

If I have to put her on a tier list, Josephine would be the middle between ‘like’ and ‘neutral’. She isn’t my favorite character and guardian, but I like her enough to not put her in neutral (and I have thoughts on her that I won’t 100% share here). With many fears (rational, irrational, surprisingly rational but on first glance irrational), due to VFD messing with her to where she has no choice to become a hermit and hide away from the danger of the world and become very safety conscious. Her years of being frighten grew to where she is cowardly and cares for herself more at times (she does ‘scream’ coward near the end of the TWW, especially in the books and Movie).

Once Quite Adventurous (Movie Only), and Fierce and Formidable (Netflix Only), if it’s not a headcanon, it’s almost canon Ike’s death was the turning point for Josephine deciding to hide away from the world. With Ike’s death, Josephine must have thought she has no choice to retreat to her hazard of a home and live alone for who know how long to keep herself safe. In both adaptations, they show hints (and Netflix only; also shown it via flashback) of Josephine’s old life through photographs. Also in both adaptations, it seems Josephine really went from ‘dangerous lifestyle’ to ‘gonna hide in my room please go away’ very fast after Ike’s demise. 

So, I’m happy and a bit upset Josephine cameos in this ATWQ book. Josephine is not 100% Quite Adventurous, or 100% Fierce and Formidable. I mean, she is those thing, but Josephine is also rather...Cautious. The fact Lemony even calls her ‘careful girl’ and Josephine is taking a risk to visit SBTS seems both adaptations was exaggerating her personality before Ike’s death/possible retirement from VFD. While certainly less afraid of the world, and much braver than TWW, there’s a implication Josephine is on her tip-toes, as well as making sure where she steps (or flies to in her helicopter). I have to say showing a teen Josephine being cautious is a good way to show how her extremism phobias and hermit habits have their roots since her younger years.

And that’s why I’m happy and a bit upset. I’m happy Josephine’s character is explore and it’s fueling to my pile of headcanons that are half bake for her. But I’m upset because...the adaptations. I’ll give Movie!Josephine a minor break though. Since it came out before ATWQ, I doubt Daniel Handler had even thought of this series and character cameos planned out. Movie!Josephine was a shot in the dark and one of the few things that somehow came out unscratched. I think the film played up her fears and cowardliness, but her photo album doesn’t mess up anything regarding ATWQ’s cameo.

Netflix however, has ATWQ. And from my past re-watch, I can now see there’s some references to ATWQ that went over my head (I am seriously hopping I didn’t got accidentally spoilers *stares at [RETRACTED]*). Anyway, Netflix!Josephine’s portrayed and the changes are fitting to her character. Her last act of courage after realizing Olaf killed Ike is rather nice. Yeah, I know it seems Josephine snapped due to his grammar mistake, but on the re-watch Josephine was all \OMO/ when Olaf slips up on the tamales, so I think Josephine confront Olaf for Ike’s murder and his bad grammar. I don’t want to say they ignore Josephine being described as a careful girl in her youth to making her freaking Sporty(TM), but if I do think of rewatching the show again sometime soon after finishing ATWQ (I started reading the first chapter before lunch and I think I’ll have more time the rest of the week to read),  ATWQ’s cameo will be haunting the back of my mind.

Josephine totally needed to called out Lemony for ditching Kit, just like Hector. Though I guess Josephine has more reason to since Kit is really close to getting lock up, all because of two ‘new’ characters: Gifford and Ghede, who also tried to kidnapped Lemony back in the first book. Damn, for ‘noble’ VFD members, they sure suck at their job if Kit is still arrested and they tried to kidnapped Lemony...for some reason.

Are they are on the fire starting side?

[adoraas]

Princess Protection Program AU

But not everything is the exact same!

The Characters:

Theodora: On the first 3 hours 16th birtnday, Theodora wakes up to her older sister Amara shaking her frantically and begging her to wake up. Their land is in danger, and in order for it to be saved Theodora has to go. Amara explains to her that it's the only way, and soon enough the Jewel of Sperus is shoved into her hands and she flees, she puts up a fight of course.

Agent Angella/ Angella Lastnamehere: Angella gets the call that once more the Horde has found itself trying to bring another country into its clutches. With a grudge against them, Angella quickly gets ready to go, she leaps into a helicopter and takes off to pick up their newest princess. This princess does nothing but scream, beg, and cry. What a struggle it was to get her into the aircraft.

Glimmer/ Glimmer is a nickname: When her mother came back from her recent trip to who knows where, she didn't expect her to bring a whole other person. How is she suppose to treat this girl "Adora" when "Adora" doesn't even respond to her name half of the time? What could this girl as well as Glimmer's mom possibly be hiding? It's not like she's a princess fleeing from a country, that would be somewhat absurb. Especially since monarchies are so rare nowadays.

Bow/ Bow is also not his real name: Bow likes to think of himself as supportive to the max! If there's an opportunity to make new friends he's going to take it. After all, his dads, Kevin and Chiron, raised him that way. Why would he toss that rule out? If he has to flip over his best friend's horse range and scale up a side of a tree to welcome another BFFL named Adora into his life than so be it! Even if Glimmer glares at him for trying.

Catra: A 3 Week Exchange Student? No one's exactly sure where she exchanged from but she's there. And it seems as though she's on the prowl for something. Maybe..not a something..but a who. Is it a concidence for Adora and Catra to show up around the same time? Who knows.

Our Organizations:

The Princess Protection Program: A Program dedicated to helping the struggling princesses in need when the evil Horde attacks, they'll be here to save your princess, and with a 89% success rate, your country too. Their Leader is Light Hope, no one knows her real name. I don't think you want to either, what if it's like Doris or something. A terrible name for a supposedly out of reach secret organization leader. PPP is like the MIB except PPP has a bad acronym, also they don't get memory wipe toys.

The Evil Horde: A kingdom gone rouge, the evil horde is dedicated to taking down everything you hold dearest, whether that be your country's people, or your life itself. With a 11% success rate, you honestly need to watch out, because thats 11 more points than 0 and that's bad.

Plot Points:

The Jewel of Sperus is passed down in Theodora's kingdom as a right of passage on your sixteenth birthday, it marks the day you can begin to be integrated into the court, and learn the ropes before your own coronation on your 19th birthday. Is this a stupid system i made up in 5 minutes? Maybe but can you prove that? No you can't.

Its the movie Princess Protection Program okay, i just made some changes! Ill talk about later, or if u ask if anyone ends up caring aldkwksn

Notes:

Angella and Glimmer own a Horse Range. Just bc i wanted Swift Wind to be here.

Bow and his dads work at the towns recreational center.

Yes Entrapta and Scorpia are apart of this au, i just havent mentioned their characters yet! King Micah is also here, or was here. Ha get it? Bc he's dead? Yeah.

Some of the other princesses are featured i just gotta figure out how? In my notes Frosta is talked about as though shes a middle schooler in the vents.

Angella hates the horde with a burning passion we don't know why. Maybe she has really huge morals? I like to think she she does. She has a wing tattoos, Glimmer is allowed to get one later in life

I havent decided on the name for where Adora and Mara live so i avoided mentioning it like the plague bc i hoped know one would notice but now that i am mentioning it you've noticed

Some horde soldiers will be here like Lonnie, Kyle, and Regalio. Regalio is not a giant lizard maybe he'll have like a giant awesome godzilla on his back or something idk?

[doctorcolubra]

This is a day late for International Women’s Day but under the cut, please enjoy me telling my wife about two Byzantine empresses (sisters!) who hated each other but hated men and/or the world even more: Zoe and Theodora Porphyrogenita. Pretend it’s a transcript from your favourite podcast hosts!

(That’s Zoe on the right, pictured with her very good friend Jesus and one of her useless husbands)

Tal: so the sisters are Zoe (the hot one) and Theodora (the ugly one), and their dad keeps trying to marry them off to other rulers but nothing's working out, and he eventually just gives up and leaves them to rot in the women's quarters together for like, most of their adult life Tal: no one really knows why but they started to haaaaaaate each other Tal: Dad dies, and the two sisters are the only heirs to the dynasty, so now the whole court is trying to marry them off to local Byzantine aristocrats Clare: "NO FUCK YOU" Tal: the mayor of Constantinople is the big pick, but Theo is like "a) he's already married and b) he's my third cousin, so no" and Zoe says "yeah whatever I'll marry him" Tal: the mayor (Romanos Argyros) has his wife have an "accident" and he's free Clare: oh fuckin what Clare: this clown over here like "idk what happened, she just slipped and fell down forty-seven flights of my steps that are inset with jewels" Tal: Zoe now accuses Theo of conspiring against her, and has her dragged off into a monastery against her will Clare: WAIT A MONASTERY FOR A WOMAN WHAT Tal: but Zoe is like, almost 50, and she's trying to conceive but she CAN'T, she's trying potions and charms and shit, OH YEAH monastery is the term for both men and women in the East, a lot of the time Tal: Byzantines loooved to force people into taking vows Clare: OKAY CONTINUE Clare: (I know next to nothing about the Byzantine Empire actually so this is great) Tal: so Zoe can't get pregnant and Romanos is tired of her, so she's furious and starts fucking a servant, really flagrantly in front of everybody Clare: ride 'em cowboy Tal: Romanos goes "k" and takes his own mistress Clare: well at least he didn't "accident" Zoe I guess (YET) Tal: but then people start saying (correctly) that Zoe and her new boytoy want to kill him, and he is "concerned" but doesn't really do anything about it, he's kind of a weak dude Clare: he sounds like a real champ from what you've said, defs Tal: so Zoe and her lover drown him in the bathtub Clare: YESSSS Clare: GET SOME ZOE Tal: NOW plot twist, the servant loverboy's eunuch brother is the chamberlain of the palace, and he's this Machiavellian character, John Orphanotrophos Tal: with his brother fucking the empress, John is like OH BOY HERE'S MY CHANCE Tal: so as soon as his brother (Michael) is married to Zoe, John's like "okay uh let's...put her somewhere, she is not the most reliable lady" Clare: in a monastery Tal: NOT YET Michael puts her back in the women's quarters for now, where she conspires against the dudes in vain Clare: Michael u dum Tal: BUT Michael is epileptic and pretty soon his health is failing, John's basically running the empire from behind the scenes Clare: jesus christ Tal: his brother's dying, so John gets his nephew lined up to be the next emperor, and when Zoe protests, boom, monastery Clare: (WHERE IS THEO IN ALL THIS) Tal: THEO'S COMIN Tal: so Zoe's been sworn in at the monastery on an island, but the people of Constantinople decide they don't care for that, and they fuckin RIOT Clare: YEAAAAHHHHHH Tal: the mob dethrones John's relative and demands ZOE AND THEODORA BACK IN TOWN Clare: i just wanna imagine all of them screaming like frat dudes, YEAAAAHHHHHHH Tal: Zoe tries to make it all about her and send Theo back to HER monastery Tal: but the people ain't having it Clare: EXCUSE YOU LADY YOU JUST GOT A REPRIEVE HDU Tal: Theo demands that the emperor be blinded (Byzantines loooved to blind people) and have HIM sent to a monastery, and I think at the same time they also get rid of John by blinding him and castrating all his male relatives Clare: I KNEW THE BLINDING THING WEIRDLY ENOUGH Clare: that shit made it into [Mormon] scripture someplace or something, I knew that one BUT JESUS Y'ALL ARE SO SAVAGE Tal: HELLA so the Orthodox have a rule that you can only marry twice, you can't be a black widow for too long over there Tal: Zoe and Theo need husbands for heirs and they don't want to fuck it up this time Clare: oh god I'm so afraid Tal: Zoe wants this one dude who she had a broken engagement with yeeeeears ago, but then she meets him again and she's like "you know what I DON'T LIKE YOUR TONE" and scratches him off the list Tal: she tries another former fling, but he gets mysteriously poisoned by his wife, like "NOT GONNA DIVORCE ME FOR THE EMPRESS, BITCH" Clare: and then Zoe marries that wife Clare: because they would rule Clare: ...sorry I just made that up GO ON Tal: she finally finds a guy who's supposed to have been "handsome and urbane", and at this point I want to mention that all three of these men were named Constantine Clare: JESUS ZOE Clare: BRANCH OUT Tal: she marries him, he becomes Emperor, Zoe is still Empress but also so is Theo, and there are already court factions breaking out between them Clare: also she over 50, whh Clare: how is babby formed Tal: right, like girl IT AIN'T HAPPENING Tal: HOWEVER Constantine #3 wants to bring a fourth into their polycule Clare: k ya big weirdo Tal: he has a long-standing mistress named Maria and he demands that she be allowed to go everywhere with them and have a title of her own and all this shit Clare: "this isn't enough drama I WANT MORE OF IT MORE OF THE DRAMA" Tal: "The 64-year-old Zoë did not object to sharing her bed and her throne with Maria Skleraina." Clare: the 64-year-old Zoe had a li'l boner for Maria Skleraina neh Tal: so idk maybe she was cool with it but the public thought it was kinda weird, so now there are rumours that Maria wants to poison BOTH Zoe and Theo Tal: so there is another riot Tal: Constantinople does not take shit lying down Clare: that's what we do in our spare time btw, all of us women with husbands and no jobs Clare: we think about poisoning Clare: everything Clare: everyone Tal: I mean I get it Clare: (poisoning someone is the bitchiest move in history and I love it every time GO ON) Tal: that was basically it for Zoe, she let her husband have the power and she focused herself on developing a line of beauty products Clare: ....you're fucking with me Tal: “Zoë recognised her own beauty and its use as a tool of statecraft. Attempting to maximise and prolong its effect she had a variety of creams and treatments prepared in the gynaeceum, and was said to have carried out experiments attempting to improve their efficacy. She operated a cosmetics laboratory in her rooms in the palace, where perfumes and unguents were constantly being prepared. Psellus reports that her face looked youthful into her sixties.” Clare: YOU WERE NOT FUCKING WITH ME Clare: I'M SCREAMING Tal: RIGHT Tal: now after Zoe died, Theo wasn't done yet Clare: you know what I want tho, you know what I want Clare: I want Theo to be poisoned by one of Zoe's neck creams Tal: IT DID NOT HAPPEN, ALAS Clare: just standing over her as she dies like THIS IS THE LONG CON, SISTER MINE Tal: Zoe died first (of presumably natural causes) and Theo basically made the dudes recognise her not as empress but as EMPEROR Clare: oh gosh I like her Tal: she got the senate and the imperial guard on her side Clare: oh I like her so much Tal: and then SHE PURGED Clare: that is such a power move that is such a Cersei Lannister move oh my god Tal: all the officials she didn't trust, all the guys that were being suggested for her position instead of her, DISMISSED AND EXILED Clare: BOOOOOM Tal: she was 76 but she gathered all the power in her own hands as much as she could, she showed up in the senate every day and judged cases herself, she was not here to play Clare: that is fucking fantastic Clare: I wanna marry her Tal: she did finally die but she refused to get married and refused to even name an heir because she knew THAT'S HOW THEY GET YOU, and only on her deathbed did she kind of nod like "I guess" to appoint some civil servant as emperor Tal: who nobody liked but they thought he was easy to control Clare: BOSS ASS BITCH Tal: YUP Clare: aaaaaaamazing Tal: and that is the story of Zoe and Theo, the end Clare: I LOVE THEM

[atunyqueso]

Diabolik lovers fanfiction information

Hi, here��s some information about my first ever fanfiction, a Diabolik Lovers x OC. I hope this isn´t too awful and cringy, please give me a break, I´m young and also have absolutely no idea how to write, and have never done this before. I wrote this because of my friend, so I hope she´s happy hahaha. Also, she requested a few things about it, such as the gender and some stuff, so I´m sorry if you would´ve preffered a gender neutral or male OC, but this one is going to be female for now. Maybe I can make a second story. Also, I can´t promise consistency, sorry. 

OC: Family name: Hinode (meaning sunrise) Name: Aika (meaning love song) Mom´s name: Ichika (meaning one thousand flowers) Deceased. Dad´s name: Asahi (meaning morning sunshine) Deceased. Siblings: an older sister, an older brother. the twins (one boy one girl) that are the youngest but she is older by minutes. Aika is the middle child.

Older sister´s name (eldest sibling): Teruko (meaning bright child) Not in contact Older brother´s name (2nd oldest): Fumio (meaning scholarly) Not in contact Younger sister (eldest twin to the youngest by a minute): Emiko (meaning beautiful child) Deceased. Younger brother (younger twin by a minute, youngest sibling): Arata (meaning fresh) Deceased.

Appearance: Doesn´t really matter so idk, but I was thinking big honey doe eyes, long-ish chocolate brown hair, heart shaped pink lips, about 5´3 maybe whatever, etc. Insert whatever you want here for now, except a couple of features that I may describe later for plot purposes.  Age: 17 (same as Yui) Ethnicity: Japanese Gender: Female (pronouns she/her) Blood type: ??? Occupation: 2nd year High School student

Hobbies: Varies a lot because she´s a bit indesicive about the things she likes. Mainly stuff like singing, dancing, reading, learning new things, spending time with friends, and cooking/baking.

Possible future job interest: Detective or psychologist (probably the latter). Anything to do with analysing people to help them. And there is a chance of her becoming a singer or idol, etc. Probably vote on this later, or leave it up to your imagination by making her study/practise both to give her options.

A few basic personality traits: Morally grey, empathetic, caring, Gen Z-ish, sarcastic, funny, a little protective, adaptable, etc. 

- You could say I´m a bit of an empath. - she joked.

- Through a strange encounter with a ghost, I developed a psychic power where when I touch people, objects or places, I feel emotions, and I get a sense of their trauma or past. - Aika explained.

This describes her power a bit. Yes, she has a power (Mary Sue´s go brrr). It´s empathy lol. Like explained above, she can feel emotions and get a sense of trauma or past off of something/someone/somewhere by touch. I´d like to add that this makes her skin sensitive everywhere to emotions, so she can vaguely tell when someone´s feeling happy or unneasy, and can know if they´re lying or not but not what the truth is. The rest of her power is harnessed by direct touch, especially her hands. This is the reason she tends to avoid touching people/stuff (unless she wants to feel or know something) and she just poses as a germaphobe to anybody that doesn´t know (only a few people know). She also always wears a pair of black leather gloves gifted to her by her mother that used to be her grandmothers´, only removing them when necessary, alone or wanting to use her power.

Just in case you noticed, yes, I´m basing this character on Theodora Craine from The Haunting of Hill House. I´m giving her the same powers and a similar backstory to what goes on in the show, but with a couple of changes you´ll see later that would explain her older siblings not looking for her while she´s with the vampires. Her personality (and looks, depending on what you imagine her as) will be different though, except the badass, iconic and sarcastic moments ;)

OH SOMETHING IMPORTANT. There will be a deeper reason to her powers other than an encounter with a ghost. The powers appeared after the meeting, but she already had them, only dormant. The reason why is not going to be reavealed until a later chapter, because she herself hasn´t found out yet, but a tiny spoiler is that she may or may not be getting a few more powers later. 

N E way, I hope you enjoy and I´m sorry if I don´t finish it oop-. Oh, btw, this is a harem story for now. It will include the Sakamakis and Mukamis as well as maybe Yui but idk yet. I may or may not add Shin, Carla and Kino. If there are any other characters I haven´t mentioned that you would like to add to the harem-ish story, please feel free to request it and I will try to add them. Onto the story...

Ok, I´m going to post the first chapter now, bye!! <3

[hyvoltage]

Day 10: Craziest Thing That’s Happened That You Saw (to party/character/your players/etc.)

Under the cut cuz I’m a long winded storyteller. Basically, the story of how mine and another’s characters speedrunned half of the first arc of our campaign.

Early on in the campaign I’m playing we were investigating a mysterious mist that plagued the city of Compass Rose every night. Anyone caught out in the mist would fall into a sort of coma from which they could not awaken.

One week, one of my fellow party members and I missed a session, so the DM did a side session with just us three. The other members of the party had gone off to do something elsewhere (in the regular weekly sesh) and we went our own way to do a bit of investigating.

After a bit of fruitless sleuthing we decided to try and get our hands on one of these gate stone type things the guards in the city had. There had been magical barriers erected in concentric circles around the Palace in the center of the city and they were hindering our progress. Having one of these stones would allow us to pass through these barriers. So, Theodora (my fellow party member, a halfling fighter) and Cael (me a dwarvish-at-the-time wild mage) decided to try and pilfer one from a guard station in the slums.

We were being escorted around by a dragonborn lady by the name of Ravvin who seemed to be like the leader of some sort of Thieves’ Guild in the city. I came up with the brilliant plan of making a scene in the guard station to buy myself a moment to mage hand one of the stones or something. I left my gold with Theo and cut my purse, this was the prop for my story. I entered the guard station and started loudly complaining about how the guards around here were completely ineffective at keeping thieves and cutpurses off the streets and this was the second time this happened to me and I wanted reparations. It wasn’t working, so I demanded to see their boss thinking it would buy me a moment alone to steal one of the stones.

They sent someone back to get whoever was in charge, which happened to be the Captain of the Guard, a man named Jacobi who we were told to look out for because he’d be trouble. So, in my mind I’m like oh shit I fucked up but I had to keep up the ruse, I kept complaining to Jacobi and it still wasn’t going so well. Luckily, at this point Theodora decided to come up to the outside of the guard station and start screaming to create a diversion for my diversion.

Jacobi brought a few guards out with him to see what was going on and the clerks and civilians in the guard station took to hiding in case it was something extra bad. I jumped over the counter and pretended to hide as well. I made out as if I was suddenly turned by this frightening event and was scared and begging to be protected like the self-entitled little prick I was pretending to be. So, I ran further into the guard station “looking for a safer place to hide.”

All the while, Theodora was giving a stellar performance pretending to be in hysterics over the mist and the murder of the kind gnomish fellow who took our party in when we arrived to find the city in this state. He had previously gone out to the woods nearby like he often did to hunt and trap but hadn’t returned. We went searching for him, as well as clues to the mist that we suspected came from the forest, and found his dead body at the entrance to a dilapidated temple.

So, Jacobi brought Theo in to the building and led her to a room that was likely used for interrogation and started asking her questions about what she saw in relation to the murder of Voltron (yeah, the gnome’s name was Voltron. That’s another story.). Theo went on and kept spinning this tale of us going out to look for him in those dangerous woods, exaggerating here and there to buy me time. 

I was passed this interrogation room at that time (so, in character I didn’t know she was there) and had found the jail cells and one guard. Rushing into the room and seeing the guard I immediately tripped and cowered on the ground begging him to protect me. He gets up and just keeps telling me I can’t be back here, I need to leave etc etc so I do. I leave the guard station entirely and meet up again with Ravvin. 

Now, while this was happening Theo let the wrong (or right) lie slip out to Jacobi. She told him that we saw the dark figure that had killed Voltron run away as we approached the temple. We never saw a culprit, we just found the body. But this lie would be the one to break the carefully planned campaign arc that our DM so lovingly crafted for us. Theo said she saw the culprit. And Jacobi replied,

“Oh. So you saw me.”

He locked the door. 

I don’t remember if he ever got so far as to start beating up Theo or something but I had been filled in by Ravvin that Theo was brought in by Jacobi, and given that I hadn’t seen either of them on my way out of the building we assumed the worst. Panic mode, I asked Ravvin what to do. Ravvin, also panic mode, says “uhhhhh idk um. Burn it down?”

“.... uh. okay.”

So, we grab a couple of hanging lanterns from the street and start smashing them against the back and side walls of the guard station to spread the oil around. I lit it up with a few Firebolts and before long, people were pouring out of the building. But no Jacobi and no Theodora.

The guards saw Ravvin and I and started to chase so we started to run. I then realized shit, I gotta go back for Theo, and, figuring Ravvin was probably more notorious than me, I tripped again. Ravvin kept running, and the guards chased her completely passing me up. 

I got up and headed back to the burning building. Still no Theo or Jacobi. So, I rushed in. Looking around, I saw nobody. And being a decent fella I couldn’t use player knowledge to head straight for the right room. I ran back to where I knew, the jail cells. She wasn’t there. But Jacobi had come out of the room and started for me. I grabbed the cell keys with mage hand and started unlocking doors, letting out inmates to both save a few lives from the fire and create a mob to put between myself and Jacobi. It worked for a bit.

Theo has this thing included in her backstory/character. She has a letter, I believe from her mother, that, if I’m not mistaken, she either isn’t allowed to or doesn’t want to open until her last moments, or until she’s ready, or something. She opened that letter and started reading. She didn’t get very far though before Ravvin started busting a whole through the weakened burning wall to the room Theo was in and Theo barreled her way out.

Jacobi had gotten through the crowd of inmates and tackled me. I was done. I was in the middle of a burning building, which I had set alight, tackled by the Captain of the Guard who, not that Cael knew at the time, was partially behind this whole mist thing and the murder of Voltron. I was fucked. But, this was early on in the game, and so, Cael had only recently received these out of control magical abilities (wild mage, remember?). So, I think, or Cael thinks, okay. These powers have exploded on me before. I wonder if I can force that to happen? You’re only supposed to be able to cast one Mage Hand at a time, I already had one up trying to unlock the cells, so I tried to cast another one while maintaining the first one.

It worked. The magic shorted out. A wave of force was thrown out from my body, crumpling the cell bars like tin foil and letting the rest of the prisoners out. I was teleported a few feet to the left, out from under Jacobi. I got up and ran out of the room. I grabbed one of the inmates and hurriedly asked him if he had seen a halfling brought in. I sprung you out of jail you little shit, tell me what you know. He saw, and he pointed me to the room. I broke my way into the room after a few tries and found it empty. But there was the hole Theo went through, and she and Ravvin were on the other side. I jumped through. We ran. We hid in the sewers. 

And Theo told us the story of how Jacobi killed Voltron.

And that, was how Theo and Cael speedrunned like half of the first arc of our campaign.

[badlydrawndrawnings]

atwq book two thoughts

i know from a search online there’s a supplementary book (kind of?) published between the second and third book, and i saw the news netflix is like, probably developing an atwq series? i love reading supplementary material, but i currently have no way of reading it, and netflix for all i know, could adapt it and i can be ‘uh....what the hell is this?’. so i’m gonna take a break from reading the atwq series (idk how long) to figure out what i’m going to do. like, i may jump into the third book and save the supplementary book for last to make myself feel better about the possible bittersweet ending this series is gonna have. 

as a kid i did not take lemony’s warning into consideration, so the me now knows better and realistically readjust ending expectations. good thing too, considering this book reveal a lot more than i thought. i guess it’s a given due to the fact it’s a four-book series and not thirteen-book series like asoue.

more of the review under the cut. i also have some asoue rambling opinions -one is which related to some atwq/tua things in regards to lemony and his family, and some thoughts on the possible netflix!atwq series.

so before going to the plot, i want to talk about kit and lemony’s last conversation for the time being. actually, i want to talk about the snicket family in general. 

teen!kit took what is probably the biggest risk for their plan to steal...whatever they wanted to steal from vfd (so it’s important enough for kit to deciding to continue the job solo but not important enough for lemony deciding to not send in a replacement despite probably the one who came with the idea; will talk about that when i get to lemony). it’s a big risk on kit’s end, and it hurts lemony is more than willing cut short the conversation. i don’t blame him for it, not really. there’s the matter of people overhearing and hiding it from their chaperones.

but teen!kit getting caught by the police makes me think of the end with kit thinking both of her brothers are dead. obviously teen!kit will have her breaking out of their custody and meet lemony and jacques again because clearly she’s not in prison by asoue (unless she actually served time, but i doubt it; adult!kit broke taxi laws and safety and got away with it) or something akin to it. now, kit in some parts of tua knew lemony was alive. she did recommended the asoue books after all. but when was the last time they talk to each other? i presumed lemony was on the run for the last 15 years since olaf pinning lemony for crimes sort of corresponded with beatrice and bertrand getting married. in their what turn out to be their last conversation (probably right before it all went to crap for lemony or before lemony’s mistaken death), did lemony cut the conversation short? or was it kit who cut the conversation short?

like maybe kit could be comparing lemony’s situation to her and thought it would end the same way, only for her to proven wrong in the worse possible way.

while kit is the important snicket that is the protagonist of her own story told in the illustrations (adult!kit confirm to have worsen eyesight as an adult), it’s nice to see jacques get a name drop. i suspect he has no clue what his younger siblings are planning or does knows, but is too far away, even father than lemony and his resident in strain’d-by-the-sea (sbts) to help out (i’m thinking the latter like the way lemony wants kit to send his regards makes me think jacques has some idea the younger siblings are planning). with the last snicket sibling out of way, i need to talk about their family.

i think i should have mention this in my review of the first atwq book, but it’s more noticeable here. lemony seems to have some memories (the hike is what i want to talk about that’s the flag that made me go ‘uhhh’ out loud and got some glances; also my headcanon about e snicket enjoying camping and nature feels more sensible now) of his parents. but in tua, lemony most likely/confirm to be taken as a baby and still crawling. with lemony’s comment about his mother and father on the day he and his siblings got taken in the tua, i assumed that at least all three or one of the siblings were able to meet up with their parents again as teenagers/young adults before their death and told their grief on that day. 

yet in this book and the last book to some minor degree, lemony talks about his parents as if he reunited with them before atwq series started. i’m not going to lie, and i should have brought it up in my last review, but i went ‘wtf’ at the first chapter of the first book i almost bought the fake parents act and the fact s. theodora markson figured it out made me go ‘oh thank good so lemony haven’t reunited with his parents yet” (s. theodora markson looking past the act means she is more competent than she looks, so i’m wondering why she’s...that with the main case she’s working on). i also made a note in my last review kid!lemony uses his imagination for familiar comfort and joy from out of his loneliness, so i’m wondering that’s the case here. i think while mentions of his parents is lemony thinking of what he wants to think, the ones with more details are ‘real’, in a sense jacques and kit told lemony. like the hike.

jacques and kit could actually remember that day and told lemony because they remember most of the events even if some parts are fuzzy. i say this because i was five and ran into traffic and almost got ran over. the memory of the incident itself is fuzzy, but i remember most of it to where i know it really did happen.

with some sad feelings of the snicket family situation out of the way, i get to talk about the atwq characters. i only know jake hix and cleo knight for one book, but i love them and i hope they become high school sweethearts (like they exist and those who are devoted to one another have great happiness with one another).

jake is honestly that meme of that guy going ‘i’ll feed you all’. i don’t want to call jake team (food) mom yet because i have a semi-bad experience of another fandom with a male character who cooks and is call ‘team mom’ due to the early parts of the fandom going out of control with it (it chilled down now hence ‘semi-bad experience’). but seriously, jake is going to care for the kids and he’s gonna feed them all and no one can stop him. no one will also stop him when he learns cleo isn’t actually okay and got kidnapped (he’s so devoted to her and her goal this is why i say i hope they become high school sweethearts) to where he was willing to crash her car in the clinic but didn’t because the car is like, non-destructible. i thought with his character description he would have like, bangs. the illustration shows that’s not the case. his bowtie is very dapper.

cleo really only showed up close to the ending so i kind don’t have a good grip of of her character like jake. but my goodness, i love her illustration (the full one that has her looking menacingly not the poster of her face). cleo’s outfit screams rich kid vibe (granted she is one) + late 1970s clothing with the future flair (cleo being ‘modern’ as she can be is helping my headcanon the vibe of the asoue world is like, slowly rebuilding and getting dominated by the world in first 20th century due to rose tinted glasses). the black and white motif her family has going on screams ‘in theory, we could order a hit man but we choose not to’ and that’s because they decided to drain the sea instead. that’s how rich they are. anyway, i doubt cleo wants to kill a person. she has to create a formula and save sbts. i don’t want to call her team (chemistry) dad just yet, because i don’t have a good grip f her character. but i like how she help moxie with her injury, and how goal driven she is to save her town from her family’s mistake.

since cleo and ellington were able to make their plan work to a degree, ellington is probably older than lemony and not just taller than him (i know 12-13 years old can look older than their real age, but people i know those age when i was in middle school only got mistaken as a freshman). also, the kid friendly noir vibes are now getting stronger. ellington just pretended to be someone else and like, it’s raising the red flags in my mind and i’m the eye emoji now i am on my guard i may be under attack. however, i still have my heart on my sleeve for her and have hopes of her reuniting with her father, who I now really think he’s a good dad and was specifically targeted (like cleo) due to being a naturalist.

it helps hangfire really shows how terrible he is. he tried to pretend to be her father! i know his voice mimicry is basically akin to juni cortez’s mimicry, but this is just cruel had ellington been there.

whatever hangfire’s group is doing, i’m not seeing how this relates with the BB statue and the people he kidnapped. we got a chemist who does things with tubes and bunsen burners and dangerous chemicals that makes one wear goggles, and a man who likes the natural environment. the tadpoles that bites are confusing me more though. why would someone create tadpoles that bites? still, with more detail of what hangfire is part of and with parts of his plan known at last, the plot is picking up speed. i’m scared, intrigued, and excited to read what will happen next, especially since hangfire is like, now going to be active in his own plan + group. they’re clearly not giving a damn about human life given their name of the inhumane society. whatever they’re planning and with the people they kidnapped so far, it has to do with the BB creature itself. is this going into the supernatural realm? is this connected to possibly the great unknown? am i overthinking connections?

i don’t have too much to say for most of the other secondary characters. i hope qwerty deals with his moth problems (so if moth balls stop moths from eating clothing, can they work in libraries? can qwerty even afford some non killing month repellent with his sub-librarian salary?), pip and squeak need to stop working and go be kids (their dad must be close to death if he’s that sick and they have to work), and prosper lost can tone down the watching. also, i think the mitchum parents don’t really love each other or not as much as before and need a divorce or couple counseling (their bickering is making me concern), and stew...still can’t find any pity or anything to find him a character i love to hate.

in regards to moxie, she is honestly the best friend lemony needs. she’s sticking her life to helping lemony with his case and while having opinions at the end of the day she just wants to help her friend in need. she puts up with so much give her an award like she got ditched at the library and stay to give lemony a piece of her mind before going all ‘okay so what we gonna do next’. she also gave him a dumb haircut. that is best friend material and i want their friendship to go into their adult years (yes i still think she’s the kind editor).

also, LEMONY CANONICALLY HAD A BOWL CUT HAIRSTYLE. he now has reasons to wear a hat and hide his face for the time being.

i said most things in regard to lemony in the snicket family situations paragraphs at the beginning of this post, so talking about kid!lemony as a solo character is not going as wordy. in this book kid!lemony could have died several times, one time by hangfire’s hand! he’s a kid, and this is really something a 17 or 18 should be in (even then i don’t want a 17 and 18 year old, or anyone of any age, be in his situation). he’s risking so much of his life for sbts and the people living there, all without knowing his sister is also in trouble as well until the final chapter. with lemony learning what happen to kit, i can’t help but wonder his worry for family will affect his actions in the next two books. though now i am question is actions pre-atwq like lemony almost got thrown out of vfd?? shoot lemony, i didn’t think he like vfd a lot as an adult ‘active’ member of vfd  but he was still loyal, but this is new. i also don’t want to say he’s staging a coup but he and a whole other sbg members -kit is obvious- are clearly doing something that’s totally a coup? was being frames for crimes he didn’t commit, living on the run, and losing everything (fiancee, friends, and family) broke adult!lemony so much it made him  ‘passive’ (i don’t think it’s the right word but it’s the one i can think of now)?

my feelings on s. theodora markson are the same as before, but i think she may be smarter than she looks given a re-think of the last book. her current behavior makes me think she is ‘warming’ up to lemony, even in the last book. she took him off probation was being ‘nice’ and when teasing lemony about his not-crush on ellington (i legit don’t know if lemony has a crush on her or is really wanting to help her out). that’s something an adult does to a child who may or may not have a crush on someone. theodora still treats lemony like she did in the previous book, no doubt due to vfd rules and her upbringing in vfd. 

i only have read two books of atwq, so i probably don’t carry too much weight on my two cents of a netflix adaptation. but i am thinking of the changes netflix asoue made with hector and kit, and vfd as a freaking whole. hector is not part of vfd the organization anymore, but he can be replaced with larry-your-waiter (just got to rewrite the balloon stuff with something else). kit is giving me a headache because i still can’t figure out if she was retcon into the youngest snicket in netflix show, and excluding that netflix!kit’s change of personality/character makes me think netflix!kit would not have gotten caught and like, kit needs to get caught it’s important for her off screen story and kid!lemony story as a side thing. because it’s the books, vfd is still the ‘old. old as balls’ conspiracy secret organization, while netflix is the ‘hey let’s make our (book) club be something more to change the world’ secret agent organization made by ishmael. well, netflix good luck with the hole you dug that is possibly kit and vfd.

it’s now round two of asoue character cameos (kit doesn’t count she’s a protagonist of her own off-screen story), and widdershins is a surprise. before i get into his atwq cameo and my opinion of the character, i want to copy-paste something from my first atwq review: asoue was one of my first fandom i entered via me me and my sister. no one else read the books or weren’t fans of them, so we turn to each other to talk about them. i began lurking pre-atwq books, but gave up after several months due to being in more active fandoms and i had bad timing to join when it was basically dead, and i outgrew the target demographic when atwq came out and i had no chance to read the books. i only made the decision to re-lurk (sparingly i am still in more active fandoms) and make and share content in 2016 (and i’m too used to lurking for this fandom. i can reblog for fandoms, just not for this fandom and i’m trying to overcome whatever is making me not do it).

so, i’m a fandom hermit living in the woods away from fandom society and i suddenly decided to enter fandom society, and all of my opinions are free of influences and other fan opinions (sans my sister but we talk more about the plot and story than characters). my opinion of widdershins is a dislike-neutral-*thinking emoji*. i dislike him, but i don’t hate him. and if i have to make a tier list of all the important and semi-important  asoue characters from favorite to hated, widdershins would actually be lump in the middle with the other true-neutral characters i have.

disliking widdershins should be obvious. with a most likely vfd upbringing, he probably thinks his actions are acceptable and the norm but they blur a lot with his parenting to where his actions are just plain awful. the big one is him throwing fernald under the bus or allowing jacques to throw fernald under the bus when it came to the anwhistle aquatic fire (i’m not sure what happen here). don’t get me started with the talk of arranged marriages and willingness to send fiona and the baudelaires -which is basically two teens, a teen i call a kid, and a baby- into a life or death place (and sunny almost died) and left without instructions and maybe no note (with the reveal of violet’s fifteenth date i wonder if widdershins and phil were putting up decorations and when they had to leave, widdershins went ‘the balloons will do’ because they spell out vfd and somehow thought he was killing two birds with one stone; it’s still bad as no note).

the whole *thinking emoji* came from the happy family photo. it got me asking ‘what the heck is up with this guy’ and a fascination on trying to figure out how he ticks. with re-reads, i got the impression widdershins was a normal and calm person/vfd member as can be. fernald clearly liked widdershins before the anwhistle aquatic fire. widdershins being fernald and fiona’s stepfather is proof mrs. widdershins loved him -flaws and all- and accept his proposal in spite of the age gap that went over my head as a kid. the way he speaks of josephine, kit, and jacques means he has friends who like him. i sort of came to the idea his level of jerkass and awfulness gradually build up over time post anwhistle aquatic fire (being its worst by tgg), and i took his off-screen actions in the end based off the photo and my impressions of pre-fire widdershins that widdershins realized what he become -probably when he got the news fernald and fiona double cross olaf- and clean up his act to be with them again, even if it kills him. 

so i’m kind of please teen!widdershins (that tiny as hell illustration makes me think he’s a teen okay) is calm and normal? he’s not screaming ‘aye’ every other sentence. he’s more considerate to others. he’s nice as he can be to kid!lemony when breaking the news teen!kit got caught (widdershins breaking the news makes me think kit and him are friends). he even complimented kid!lemony for the not coup kid!lemony is planning (he’s probably going along with the not coup he’s clearly not stopping it; and i want to say their friendship ended when widdershins believed a certain daily punctilio story and showed it everyone- including beatrice- which lead to widdershins forgetting lemony’s name, yet lemony was part of the crew of two after jacques, so something else must have been the cause?). teen!widdershins has his philosophy of not hesitating, but it’s not consuming his life. from what i read, teen!widdershins is someone (kid and teen) fernald would and probably did got along with: it’s the older big brother (figure) who has cool stories to tell while also being sensible with kind words and advice when the younger sibling feels down and needs help and probably let said sibling do whatever they want. it perfectly lines up with my messed up widdershins-caliban theory headcanon holy ****

with the cameo now in mind, i can’t help but wonder if teen!widdershins would hesitate -or not hesitate- to punch his adult self for becoming radically different.