#idk my other plans have been such a pain in the ass to think around so far that maybe ill take my own advice but like. fml idk
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angusmcdragon · 4 days ago
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and maybe this is too extensive! maybe i should be cutting it up into smaller pieces!
but i dont want to 🏄‍♂️
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phoenixyfriend · 2 months ago
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Weird Egg?
Okay so in theory, Obi-Wan was plausibly on Mandalore when Anakin was born, right?
(this is technically a variation on a few other fics and AUs I've seen, and I'll list the stuff that came to mind at the end.)
While on Mandalore, Obi-Wan finds An Egg while hiding in a cave with Satine. And he doesn't recognize it, and Satine doesn't recognize it, and even Qui-Gon doesn't recognize it.
Which makes it weird, at the very least, and probably rare. It's the size of his HEAD and even though there's no parent around, the egg is… warm, now? He didn't notice at first, but it's definitely producing at least some of its own heat.
So Obi-Wan brings the egg with him, which is a pain in the ass in terms of maneuvering, but they do seem to have better luck avoiding Death Watch than before, which uh. Given that the egg feels warmer when they're getting lucky, and seems to glow in the Force, they think might not be a coincidence. A lucky rock, except it's alive.
Mission ends. Obi-Wan plans to take the egg back to the temple for study in case they just discovered Something, and as he's saying goodbye to Satine… the egg Hatches.
It is a dragon.
The dragon can project words into Obi-Wan's mind. It's not quite capable of complex thoughts yet, but it's a he (probably), and has a name (Anakin!), and considers the person who's been carrying him and protecting him and keeping him warm for the past six months to be his mom!
Obi-Wan protests at this. Qui-Gon decides to make his life harder with the 'correction' that Obi-Wan would be a dad, not a mom.
So now Obi-Wan has a small dragon which will be growing to the size of a house, that imprinted on him and is following him home and calling him dad and insisting on sleeping in his bed
Idk if you've ever read Septimus Heap, but… the MC of that found a Fancy Rock, put it in his bag, carried it around for a YEAR because he kept forgetting to take it out of his bag, and then it hatched into a dragon. And I kept thinking about that the whole time I wrote this.
In Obi-Wan's defense, he does Have A Plan.
Until the dragon hatches, turns out to be a sapient as a toddler (with promise of growth), and calls him Dad.
And now the plan is gone.
He just wanted to bring a cool egg back to the Temple for study!
And now the Mandalorians are pulling out old books about whatever the fuck this is because these things APPARENTLY went extinct around the same time as the underwater dragon-adjacent thing that is the Mythosaur.
Obi-Wan learns that supposedly the eggs are inert until something with the Force interacts with it in a Purposeful Manner.
Which includes "probing it a little to see if whatever is inside is actually alive."
Anakin's a standard western dragon that can breathe fire because Flyte. Also this post.
Weeeee okay small text for the references I mentioned.
Obviously, first up is the Septimus Heap series by Angie Sage, specifically Magyk and Flyte.
The fic series I was thinking of initially that kind of jumpstarted the AU process was Boga Service Varactyl AU, but specifically Kenobi Kafé Service Animal Boga AU.
I've been seeing a couple of dragon shapeshifter AUs, including that post I linked earlier from @ahsoka-in-a-hood, @bubblew0lf1's dragon shapeshifter AU, and @squad-724's Dragon Jedi AU has been all over my dash for the past few days.
Stubborn to the Bones by @tideswept, which was part of what had me connecting the various dots of Obi-Wan Finding Animal Anakin on a mission, though our outcomes are admittedly very different lol. (Their fic is shippy, and mine is more decidedly gen/familial with a slight nod to Obitine.)
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puck-luck · 3 months ago
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i desperately need a jealous, toxic??, possessive Jack smut😭
this man is so insecure/jealous about his girl even his brothers can’t get too close to her idk im insane
Just a quick one before I embark on my 9 hour drive home (with a time difference😚!)
"Mine," Jack growls, a slap sounding as his hand makes contact with your ass.
You nod into the sheets, feeling a little lost in the moment.
Jack's been fucking you for what feels like forever. When he's jealous, it's like he turns into a machine. He stays hard, he never loses his pace, never needs to pause to catch his breath, and he's attentive. He's always determined to make you come as many times as he thinks will remind you that you belong to him.
Tonight, he's determined to make you come five times– one for each time you took a shot with his brothers. You were celebrating the release of NHL 25 and Quinn and Luke, finally single at the same time and elated that they were on the same "party mode" wavelength for once, roped you into the mindset. Jack partook with you, but he mostly just nursed a beer and watched you hop off of his lap to go join his brothers for the next round.
It wasn't that big a deal, you thought, but Jack pouted more and more with each traipse over to the bar away from him, and by the end of the night he was positively glowering.
Which is how you ended up here– your face shoved into the covers and your hips lifted high in the air for Jack to clutch as he pounds into you.
Another spank brings you back to the moment. Your skin is burning and probably stained red with how often and how harshly Jack has laid his hands on your cheeks. You don't mind. You like the marks– not being able to sit comfortably for a couple of days means that Jack will be giddy each time you wince. He loves a lasting reminder of his influence over you and his joy is rather contagious.
"Never gonna fuck anyone else, even if you wanted to," Jack spits out like a threat. It burns your heart like a branding iron. "Isn't that right?"
"Never," you agree. You almost bite your tongue from the force of his thrusts, keening and spreading your knees an inch further so that he can press deeper.
"Cuz I've ruined you," Jack continues. "You'll only ever think about me when you get off. I've spoiled you."
"Mhm," you whine. He loves hearing you respond, hearing you whimper and wail for him. He loves when your voice breaks and cracks because of how he's affecting you.
"Show me how much you love me," Jack urges, reaching up to fist your hair and bring you up to his level. Once your back is securely against his chest and your head is lolling back on his shoulder because you're boneless and spent, he brings his hand around and closes his fingers around your neck. His other hand creeps between your legs, sliding over your swollen clit.
It takes only the one calculated pass to make you come again. It's barely a reaction from you, more of an involuntary convulsion as your body tenses up from the overwhelming rush of pleasure. It's almost painful, coming again, but Jack's whispered assurances have you grinding back on him and whining for more.
You're whining for a sixth, unable to part with his cock. In a demented way, it's been inside of you for so long and has made you feel so good that you're starting to feel like you need him inside of you all the time. It's like you cannot exist without his cock inside of you– a sentiment that will have Jack turning smug and exhilarated. This was exactly his plan. He wanted to make you his, and now you cannot fathom being without him.
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grandlinedreams · 1 year ago
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I always see strawhat!reader x law stories all over the place, so can I request a kid pirate!reader x law? Where, specifically the reader is Kid’s younger sister (or killer’s, I mean a sister of one is basically the sister of the other)?
YES oh my god I didn't know I needed this til I wrote it and I hope that you like it too!! I think having Kid as a big brother would either be the best or worst thing in the world ㅡ set somewhere in timeline idk maybe around Stampede
[Heads up!: afab/fem aligned reader, some cursing, shovel talk from kid, established relationship]
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Being in the same pirate crew as your older brother in and of itself is a little odd. Being in the same pirate crew as your older brother when he's the captain makes it a little odder, you suppose. At least to those who only see it at a glance, brief glimpses rather than seeing the whole picture.
You don't mind, not really. Most older brothers would probably have tried to talk their younger sister from becoming a pirate ㅡ but all Kid had done was stare at you and then scoff. "I'm not your damn babysitter, I won't stop you."
And that was that ㅡ if there'd been dissent when you joined, Kid put a swift stop to it with a fierce glare and well-described threats about what would happen if they laid a finger on you. But you're strong in your own right, and the one or two who continued to push the matter learned it the hard way.
And truth be told, Kid doesn't treat you like his little sister. He's your older brother yes, and there are hints of it here and there when you know where to look, but it's Killer who takes on the softer aspects of being an older brother to you when you need it.
Which is what makes this so surprising that it's Kid who's staring down the man you've been dating behind his back.
"So." Crimson eyes lock with gold. "You and my sister, huh." His attention shifts to you for a moment. "How long has that been going on?"
"Not longㅡ"
"A while."
If Law can feel your furious look aimed for him, he doesn't show it. Kid looks far from thrilled at the differing answers, scowling as he refocuses on Law.
"Guess it doesn't matter how long it's been going on, becauseㅡ"
"Because I'm a grownass adult, Kid!" You snap, frustrated with your brother who looks like he'd like nothing more to swing a fist at Law. He turns on you, and you match his glare for its intensity. "I'm not going to let you ruin something good for me because you decided to pull the older sibling card for once."
You know Kid cares, you know he loves you ㅡ and you love him just as much, because at the end of the day, he's your brother.
Kid stares at you for several long moments before he scoffs. "Fine. Do what you want. But you're not leaving us for that shitty crew of his."
"I wasn't planning on it, asshole! Somebody's gotta help Killer keep your dumb ass alive!"
"Don't yell at me, I'm still your older brother!" Kid glares at you and you match his gaze for its intensity before he rounds on Law. "If you hurt her, I'll let her kick your ass first, and then I'll finish the job."
Law meets his glare, his expression carefully blank. "I wasn't planning to."
Kid scoffs before he shifts his attention back to you. "I'm giving you two minutes to do whatever you need to before we leave, with or without you."
"And here you said I wasn't allowed to join their crew." Your eyes gleam. "Doesn't give me much choice if you leave me here."
Kid scowls before he stalks off, mumbling loud enough that you can hear his complaints of "dumbass little sister" and "been a pain in my ass since you were born" before it fades completely.
"That went about as well as I expected," you sigh before you approach Law. "He's nowhere near as scary as everyone thinks when you have as much blackmail as I do."
"He doesn't scare me." Law glances at you. "It's still surprising that you're related."
You raise an eyebrow. "I'll take that as a compliment." Stepping closer, you lean up to press your lips against his in a short, chaste kiss. "I should go. Don't need him figuring out that we've done more than just kiss."
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runa-falls · 1 year ago
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cat and mouse - 2
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Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x Supervillain(?)!Reader
Warnings: kissy kissy :3, mention of alcohol, you're broke. sorry.
a/n: i wrote this out today (what is now a few days ago) because i couldn't work on the other fic until i got this out of my system :) if there are plot holes its because i vomited out this chapter and threw it out like a dumbass. idk what Black-Cat's personality is like so i made it kinda mirror cat woman from the harley quinn show.
Summary: Every time you try to convince people it was an accident, you immediately get ratted out to the Spider. But really, it was! You don't know why you're being hunted, you didn't even do anything wrong. Yet.
w/c: 2.6k
part 1 part 3 part 4
masterlist
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Nueva York’s friendly neighborhood Spider-Man, as he, and the world, likes to call him, is your official nemesis, or at least that’s what the city thinks.
You crumple up the half-soaked People magazine, filled with ‘juicy gossip about our favorite Spider and the new villain-of-the-week: Blaze’. Seriously, you might just become a villain if they keep calling you that.
You briefly forgot you swiped the news story off of a nearby food and entertainment stand (that’s barely holding up in the downpour) until you hear:
“Hey! You gotta pay for that!” 
You don’t. 
In your defense, it was only a dollar-fifty. And either way, it’s technically the Spider’s fault that you didn’t have a penny on you!
Honestly, if it were your choice, you’d never see his stupidly broad shoulders again. He truly is the bane of your existence and a major pain in your ass. You genuinely don’t understand why he even pays you any mind, it’s not like you are plotting to take over the city. You just want enough money to get some fries and a Koka Soda, and maybe a couple more black articles of clothing that aren’t covered in clawed-out stripes. 
Spider-Man? More like Cat-Man. 
You would say you’ve been “fighting” this man for weeks like the magazines insinuate, but it’s less violence than it is just you squirming out of his clutches and running away. You swear the Spider is a bloodhound. No matter where you are, or what you’re wearing, he always finds you. And you always get away. It’s actually quite pathetic. 
He goes: “It’s you again.”
You say: “No it’s not.” 
Then he has to say: “Blaze.” Like you’re some ultra-nemesis that has ruined his life.
And you can’t help but: “Stop fucking calling me that, dude.” Before you make a run for it. 
He catches up, obviously, either has you on the ground, against the wall, or holds you up so you can’t escape, but then you do. Every time. And he lets you. 
So really, it’s just fucking annoying. What a waste of a great plan and an excellently executed silent break-in!
You never asked for any of this. The fact you don’t have a flashy-ass elastic suit should be proof enough: You’re not a supervillain. 
But, when the opportunity to make a little more cash comes around, you can’t just say no. In your mind, the bigger the heist, the longer you can stay out of the public and away from him. 
And if the one girl on the team wants to make you a suit, how can you resist? The Spider has ruined all the other clothes you’ve worn (and not in a good way). 
You saw your new suit a few hours before you needed to meet up with the team. Felicia, or Black Cat as the rest of the group refers to her, is probably the most elegant and badass woman you’ve ever met. 
She has voluminous silver-blonde curls and sharp green eyes that match the deadliness of her talon-like retractable claws (which actually kinda remind you of someone…). Though she doesn’t have explosive energy inside of her as you do, her cat-like senses and martial art skills are almost as deadly. 
Felicia was happy to invite you over to her multi-million dollar penthouse to get ready and hang out a little before you needed to leave. 
She’s filing her nails into perfectly deadly points as you sit on her plush ultra-white couch next to the new suit, hands fiddling nervously together as you watch her pamper herself with extreme precision. There are two glasses of high-grade champagne in front of you on the glass coffee table. Yours is barely touched. Hers has been drained and refilled a couple of times throughout the hour. 
“You know, usually I’d work this job alone, but it’s a lot easier to get away when you leave a few maggots to distract the Spider. That’s what men are for. Us girls need to stick together, right?” 
Even her voice is elegant. 
“Yeah.” You croak out. You prefer to listen to her talk than say something dumb and non-villain-like. And yeah, you’ll admit you’re a tiny bit scared of her, but sometimes that’s something you have to go through when making friends. Right?
“Alright, we’ve got like 20 minutes. Go on, babe, try it on.” She loosely gestures to the suit, “Bathroom is in the hallway, first door to the left.” You stand promptly and shuffle over to her bathroom, taking a second to look back to send a grateful smile at her before you close the door. 
It almost resembles the one you saw on her the first day you met. The only difference is that yours is completely black and has a high collar neckline in contrast to her more provocative V-shaped suit.
There’s no fur-lining or silver details, just an invisible zipper that creates the illusion that this suit is painted onto your body. Felicia also provided a simple mask that you can pull over your head when you tie back your hair and some silver hair spray so you’re less recognizable to the general public. 
You stare in the mirror and smooth out any wrinkles down your torso with your gloved fingers. Alright. Now you look like a supervillain. 
Or at least a super-something. 
She makes you do a little spin. “You look lovely, darling.” A smirk pulled at her charming lips. “Absolutely, perfect.” 
Fuck.
So here you are, trying to break out of a bank that shut down around you as soon as you walked in. The two guys, who you never took the time to learn the names of, are freaking out, banging harshly against the metal doors that slammed shut in front of the exits. 
Felicia, on the other hand, is as cool as a cucumber, checking her nails like there isn’t a blaring siren and pulsing lights around her. 
So what now? You could probably blast the doors open with whatever comes out of your hands (you’re still not sure as you try to use your powers as a last resort). But that would leave a bunch of evidence that you were there and you didn’t come to knock down a whole building.
You walk over to her, trying to hide the anxiety that’s starting to bubble up inside of you. “What should we do?” She looks up from her manicured nails and looks at you. Then at the guys.
“Well, the boys seem a bit preoccupied,” As if to prove her point, one of them starts kicking the door, as if it would magically open up for him if he were to hit it harder and make more noise. She sighs, “I guess we could use the air duct that leads to the roof.” 
“Ok.”
So you follow her to one of the main offices in the building, watching as she easily rips off the cover of the vent and uses the desk for leverage to hoist her into the surprisingly spacious air duct. 
The chill evening breeze of Nueva York has never felt so good. Well, it has smelt better, but if garbage and crime-filled air meant you’re not going back to jail, you’ll take it. 
“Well, that could’ve gone better.” The Black Cat runs her fingers through her hair, pushing it back and out of her face. Of course, it falls perfectly over her shoulders. “So…I’ll see you later, yeah?” She’s leaving?
“Uh, yeah, sure. I’d love to!” 
“Great.” She walks to the edge of the roof and scales down the back of the building like it’s nothing. Look, it’s not that tall of a building, but still, you weren’t about to follow her down. You watch as her black-suited figure lands on the concrete ground, barely making a sound, before she sashays into the shadows of the city, disappearing into the night. God, she’s so cool. 
And then it’s just you. 
You sit yourself down and finally take a breath. Your first job as a villain and you didn’t even get to see the money. What are you getting yourself into?
You pull slightly at the elastic holding your hair together, regretting the tight pony that’s now giving you a major headache. Maybe this life isn’t for you. With, probably an overdramatic, sigh you push yourself up. Now to figure out how you’re getting out of here. 
Turns out you didn’t have too many options. As soon as you were about to take a serious ‘leap of faith’ and try to scale down the building, you were ambushed by a series of fwp, fwp, fwp’s and lifted from the ground. That probably saved your life now that you’re thinking back on it.
So, he found you. Big surprise. He’s practically stalking you at this point.
He takes you for a ride, holding you close as he swings from building to building, barely breaking a sweat. You’re actually surprised that you didn’t hurl all over his stupidly firm shoulder. You should have.
You don’t know why he brought you to the top of a half-constructed building, but you’re assuming he’s just trying to be dramatic again. Superheroes, right? 
You struggle against restraints when you’re finally set down, at least trying to lay in a more comfortable position as Spider-man stands over you. Not only are you fully wrapped in red webs, but your arms are also tied behind your back.
The Spider kneels down, watching you continue to struggle, “Alright, Hardy, give it up.” Hardy? Shit, he must think you’re Felicia. The black suit, the silver hair. Dammit. 
He takes off your mask before you can say anything, pulling out your loose hair tie with it, and boy, is he surprised to see it’s you.
“Wh–Blaze?” He takes off his mask like he can’t believe his fabric-covered eyes. His scarlet gaze not so subtly takes in your new look. A big change from the usual getup you wear. “What, uh,” When he finally meets your eyes, one of his gloved hands raises to rub at the back of his neck. Is he nervous? He briefly looks away from you, “What did you do to your hair?”
“Who cares! Let me out of these!” You glower at him, arms tugging at the luminous webs, “And you know I hate that stupid-ass name.”
“What the hell were you doing here? Why are you suddenly hanging out with a bunch of criminals?”
You give him a deadpan expression, “I’m a villain, remember.”
“Ah,” He slices through a couple of the overlapping webs that fit snugly over your stomach. “Finally giving into the narrative, hm?” Then the ones around your arms.
“S’not like I have much of a choice.” The red webs start to loosen until they unravel completely and pool on the floor. “So, you’re…letting me go?” You rub at your sore wrists, feeling the ache dissipate almost immediately. He shrugs like it’s no big deal for him. 
“It’s expected, isn't it?” He’s at the edge of the roof staring at the buildings around him, a soft breeze sweeps through his hair, and the lights of ‘the city that never sleeps’ soak over his suited figure from below.
“Just like that?” 
“...Just like that.” He says. But he says it more to himself than you. With that, he swiftly puts his mask back on, hiding the wonderfully serene expression he once held, but you never got to see in full. 
Spider-man is confusing. He treats you like you’re some sort of catch-and-release criminal. Acting like a push-over parent that reprimands their child even when they know they’ll do it again. You don’t get it. 
And the way he looks at you sometimes. Like he’s having fun. You see it when he’s chasing you, webbing you to the wall, or holding you under his claws. There’s a glowing heat that pulses in his eyes and you can almost see the barest gleam of his fangs. You can’t even wrap your head around how he can both infuriate and draw you in at the same time. And then he lets you go. 
And now he’s leaving you. 
So you take your chance. 
“Wait.” He stills but doesn’t turn back to look at you. He just stays there, merely stopping to listen to whatever you have to say. But you want him to look at you. You need to see those simmering red eyes that are hidden behind the mask. “I-” You stop yourself. You’re not actually sure what you were going to say. All you know is you just weren’t ready for him to leave yet. “I, um, never caught your name!” It blurts out of your lips before you realize what you’re saying. 
Then silence.
How awkward. 
You were sure he was going to leave you there. No sane superhero would reveal his secret identity, dumbass! Especially to a girl like you.
But then his hand comes up, slips off his mask again, hair slightly ruffled from the action, and he finally turns. Before you know it he’s approaching you, fast. And you can’t do anything but stand there, watching as his looming form starts to take up more and more of your vision until he’s standing right in front of you, head tilted downwards and red eyes low. 
Two warm palms cradle your jaw and you lean into the touch, eyes fluttering closed at the feeling. Just as your eyes start to open again, his head is dipping toward yours. Then his lips meet yours.
And it’s perfect. His soft plush lips move against yours, occasionally nipping and sucking on your bottom lip until it was satisfyingly plump. The warm, masculine smell surrounding you makes your knees weak as his hands drop from your face to your waist in an effort to pull you toward him.
Your body melts against him as he starts to softly lick into your mouth, thoroughly seeking out the taste of you. He pushes you gently against the unfinished concrete wall behind you, eliminating any space that was left between your thinly suited bodies. You swear you’re about to melt when you feel his broken groan against your lightly suited-chest.
And then you separate, heavy breaths and intense gazes floating between you. “Miguel.” He looks down at the way he’s holding you, the size of his palm against your smaller body. And then the ridiculous suit that was tailored specifically for the heist, but looks more like something you’d wear for a BDSM session. He clears his throat and looks back up, “Miguel O’Hara.”
“Miguel…” His hand on your waist clenches at the sound of your hoarse voice and you can tell he’s tempted to pull you back in. 
“You’re one of the few who know.”
Now, you’re curious. You hum, “Who else knows?” His eyes glance at your hair and his hand drops. Suddenly, you feel cold. He steps away from you, not unkindly, but it’s clear he’s trying to create space. 
He brushes it off, “No one important.” And then he’s walking away. Back to the same spot he was going to leave you from. Cool. 
“Well,” You take a few steps closer, eyes roaming over his muscled back,  “I promise not to tell anyone.”
“I know.” His mask is back on, and this time you know there’s no stopping him this time. “Catch you later, Little Red.” He jumps. 
Little Red? 
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demxnicprxncess · 1 year ago
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hey can i suggest any nsfw headcanons for the evans?? i love those types of drabbles and i think i would thoroughly enjoy whatever you decide to do w this request, since your writing never fails to amaze me 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️
havent done request in a while but sure love
Taglist: @kitwalkersgfff, @yes-divine-ruler, @quicksilversg1rl, @charsdunkis, @eddiemunsonsbitch69, @dahmevan, @sultrysullen, @kaylaperiodqueenslay , @fuckedbykai , @mykie-way , @bxbyalixo , dm me to be added or removed dears.
TW: NSFW, opinions, and kai anderson, Smut.
Tate Langdon:
He likes having a sense of control, but still he enjoys being babied, def a switch.
If you tease him enough he gets a little whiney or possibly aggressive.
He IS a teenager so... he'll fuck you anytime, anywhere.
Can be a selfish lover, but he doesnt intend to.
Sometimes, he wants nothing more than to please you. No doubt.
Praise Kink, pain kink, possible humiliation, possible mommy kink. Maybe a small daddy kink, just cause its what he would see in porn. He def would mark you with hickeys and bites. BDSM (mostly his suit ngl)
He bit into your neck over the hickey before licking it softly as his thrust picked up in pace. "Say it baby." She whined gripping on the desk in the empty classroom he had drug her into her hands tied behind her back with his belt. "It feels so good" She'd choke between moans before he laid a smack against her ass. Feeling her clench around him as she came led him to pull out a paint her back in his cum. "There we go baby. Quit talking to that asshole." She nodded softly still tired before she heard the bell ring. "Come on."
Kit Walker:
He LOVES having control, however sometimes he'll let you take control so you can take care of him.
He might whimper, but mostly groans.
He'd fuck you anywhere in your house, or in his car but thats about it i feel like.
he isnt a selfish lover, he wants you cum at least twice.
He'd place your pleasure first no doubt.
daddy kink, breeding kink, maybe just maybe hes into hair pulling.
He kept his thrust steady as she laid back on the bed arching into his touch, "Almost there pretty girl. Just a lil' bit more fa me doll." He groaned into her ear as she clung to him slightly pulling his hair. This prompted him to slip his fingers down to her clit, moving in a figure eight pattern with a steady speed to match his thrust as he kissed all along her neck. "You'll look so pretty with my child in you" With his other hand he placed it on her stomach, "You want me to give you one baby?" She eagerly nodded beneath him as she came undone, prompting him to release his seed deep into her womb. He stopped and laid there his face in her boobs for a minute, "Ya got one more fa me baby?" She whined softly and shook her head, "I dont like odd numbers though baby, and four is our lucky number."
James March:
Hes in control but lowkey wouldn't mind being dominated, he'd just say it was him getting some love in a way.
He grunts and groans no doubt. Sometimes he whimpers.
Anywhere in the hotel is great of course but like he loves laying you on the bed and watching the way you sink into his sheets.
He is never a selfish lover. Maybe a tease, but never selfish. he'd please you no doubt.
Okay so knife kink, master kink (idk i just like the sound of master march.) blood kink hes into marking, loves hearing you scream, loves your tears, hes into bondage.
"Scream my name darling." His thrust were harsh and planned to torture you, triggering your release while he kept going. He wanted to reach his own orgasm while she whined beneath him wanting to hold him but not able to because of the handcuffs keeping her arms above her head, "James, please? I want to touch you sir." He looked down at her before undoing the cuffs letting her wrap around him in a kiss as he filled her with his seed. "Darling, you truly are something wonderful."
Part one since this bullshit has been sitting in my drafts for the longest.
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mybiasisexo · 1 year ago
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Entangled - Part 8
Pairing: Chanyeol x f.Reader Chapter Warnings: Language   Word Count: 5k Author Notes: okay, I feel like this is lowkey a filler chapter 😭. but I like it so idk lmao. so much has happened since I last updated. I quit my old job, got a new one (that's kicking my ass. pray for me) had my bday and saw Beyonce 3 times!! but yeah as always sorry for the delay, hope you like the chapter and feel free to lmk what you thought!!! I loooove feedback and y'alls commentary!!! makes my damn day!! have fuuuuuun~!
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You come to the following morning from what is possibly the best sleep you’ve gotten in years. A yawn escapes you as you stretch your tender body.
The action has you aware of something not moving around you, and you glance down to see a heavy arm thrown over your waist. As if the owner of the limb can sense your attention, it constricts, pulling you closer to a heat behind you.
Startled, you tense up, not even daring to breathe as you carefully roll onto your back and then turn your head the rest of the way until you’re knocking your nose gently against Chanyeol’s.
He’s in a deep slumber. Gentle snores leave his slightly parted lips, and his features are relaxed. He looks so peaceful, so serene, so…content. It melts your heart. You can’t help but stare at him, noticing the way his silky tawny hair falls across his pillow and the stubble poking out of his chin that grew in from the night before.
The night before….
Your eyes widen at the reminder and you’re sitting straight up, causing Chanyeol’s arm to fall limply on your lap.
Oh, you’ve really done it now.
Chanyeol stirs, and you think you’ve woken him, but he just rolls onto his other side, revealing his naked back to you.
Harsh rows of red raised skin catch your attention–the proof of how good a lover he is. Even though you know to some men, Chanyeol included, the scratches are a badge of honor, you only feel remorse from causing him pain.
His lack of clothing has you aware of your current state of undress and you quickly pull the thin sheet over your chest. It’s a silly action. Chanyeol’s sleeping, but even if he was awake, he’s seen your breasts plenty of times, had them in his goddamn mouth last night for christ’s sake.
Still, you must at least try to preserve some dignity.
You dare another glance at the man beside you, as if he’s a figment of your imagination that will vanish once you’re in your right mind. He doesn’t go away, so you must be really out of it.
Groaning, you drop your head, hitting your forehead repeatedly with the palm of your hand.
Idiot. Idiot. Idiot.
Fucking your ex fiance was the last thing you had planned to do on this trip. Getting closure? Sure. Making peace? The least you could have done. Now? Things have become even more complicated. Which is pretty impressive given everything that has transpired over the last couple days. And Yerim…. God, Yerim. She hasn’t even been gone twenty-four hours and you’ve already jumped her man’s bones. Sure, he was yours first, but it’s the principle of the thing.
Shit, maybe you are the problem.
As if you aren’t already about to dive in a pool of panic, a memory from the night before decides to reveal itself. The knowledge has you gasping, staring unseeingly ahead of you in terror.
Did you tell Chanyeol you loved him?
Oh, god. Oh, fuck.
Yeah, you gotta get out of here.
Feeling nauseous, you stumble out of the bed, crumbling to the ground the minute you put weight on your legs. Your bambi legs are a byproduct of Chanyeol’s pleasurable menstrations, having you literally weak in the knees. You shake your head and push through the slight throbbing of your core, standing carefully on shaky legs. Chanyeol chooses this moment to toss back around so that he’s facing you again. The arm that was around you earlier flops forward to reclaim its position, but lands on egyptian cotton instead. His eyebrows scrunch together as his hand idly runs over the empty space–searching for you. Feeling bad, you pull down a pillow. His fingers find it and yank it towards him, curling into it like a toddler with his favorite teddy bear. Your name leaves his mouth in a content breath, and all the turmoil in you dissipates for a moment. Maybe you’re overreacting? Yerim won’t be too mad, right? And Chanyeol still wants you, right? Last night meant something to him?
Did it mean something to you?
You can’t even think about that right now. Truth is you have no idea where you stand, and are even more confused than before the wedding. You’ve blurred the lines and anything can mean anything.
What you do know is that you need to leave, and you need to do it before Chanyeol wakes up. You can’t face him right now, not before you understand your emotions and actions.
“Focus,” you order yourself. You scan the floor that is now a mess of discarded garments, and a shimmer of gold catches your eye. You snatch it up, only to find it’s Chanyeol’s tie. You stare at it, remembering the way he demanded you to undress him, and drop it like it shocked you, shivering from the memory. That is definitely not what you’re looking for. 
There. A little further you find your dress and underwear. You slide them on quickly, not bothering to zip up your dress. You’re only going a few doors down, so you only hold it against your chest.
Despite telling yourself to focus, you can’t stop thinking about your confession. Obviously it was the lust speaking, the nostalgia. Yeah, that’s all that was.
Chanyeol never said it back.
The epiphany straightens your back, and you startle as you lock eyes with yourself in the floor length mirror directly in front of you. The woman before you is tragic, her hair poofy and stiff, eyes rimmed black, face puffy and nose still red from crying. You look like the clown you are.
You shudder, truly haunted, and head out. You pause by the door to slip into your shoes and grab your purse. Your heels have a buckle, but you can’t risk wasting any more time, so you don’t bother securing them. 
You open the door and a choir of angels begin to sing.
Their joyous voices die with a record scratch at the sight of Byun Baekhyun standing on the opposite end, fist up as though he’s about to knock.
You can’t catch a break.
He takes you in, visibly shocked. He says your name in a dramatic loaded question and you wince at his volume, bouncing off the walls. Damn, this is not good.
“What are you doing here?” He asks accusingly.
You quickly peek over your shoulder, checking to see if your new visitor is loud enough to wake Chanyeol. He doesn’t stir, and you can’t fight the pride that blooms in you. You wore that man out!
Shaking the emotion off, you turn back to Mr. Loud Mouth in front of you.
“Hush,” you hiss, shoving him back with the arm not currently holding both your dress, and what little you have left of your sanity, together. You make sure the door closes with a gentle ‘click’ before grabbing Baekhyun’s arm, dragging him the couple doors down to your suite. He yelps and asks where you’re ‘kidnapping’ him. It’s easy to ignore his helpless cries with the obnoxious sound of your heels slapping against your feet. 
Once in front of your door, you dig through your purse for your key, forgetting you didn’t secure your dress. The top half flutters down, titties basking in the breeze.
You freeze, eyes closing tightly as you bite your bottom lip so hard you think you’re going to bite it off. Your only saving grace is that Baekhyun is behind you, obscuring his view of your private bits.
You hear him huff in annoyance before he’s brushing your hair out of the way, gathering your dress, zipping it up as far as it can go with your arms not in the sleeves.
“Thank you,” you whisper, face burning in shame. Dejectedly, you find the key and get you both in. You kick your clacky shoes off, not wanting to draw unwanted attention, and lead Baekhyun to your room. You rest your forehead against the door as you close it, giving yourself a moment to just breathe.
Once you’ve deluded yourself into thinking you’re good, you turn around and face your friend. He’s taken residence in your vanity chair, searching your frazzled figure with worry. You can only imagine what you must look like from his point of view.
Finally, he musters the courage to speak. “You look….”
“I don’t want to hear it.”
“Okay…. Would you care to explain why you were running out of Chanyeol’s room like you robbed him? In your wedding clothes, no less, first thing this morning?”
You rub your eyes. To be honest, no, you didn’t want to have this conversation. Especially with Baekhyun. No offense to the guy, you adore him, but he’s not really known for taking things seriously. Except… right now it does appear he’s taking this situation very seriously. Although there is a hint of playfulness in his tone, you can’t see any of it on his face, only genuine concern.
Defeated, you sigh and march to your bed, plopping down onto the edge to bury your face in your hands.
“We had sex.”
“Really? I couldn’t tell,” he answers sarcastically. You glare at him through your fingers. He grins in reply, but it’s soft, reassuring, letting you know that everything will be okay.
It slips from his face as a thought occurs to him. “You weren’t drunk, were you?”
You shake your head and he lets out a relieved breath.
“Quite the opposite. It was probably the most sober decision I’ve made this whole trip.”
“So, what went wrong?”
“I just….” You recall your confession and wince, stomach flipping with embarrassment. “We ended up running into each other in the elevator and went to his room. We were only supposed to talk. But, I don’t know. You know the wedding was a lot for us both. And this trip has been very stressful and tense and we haven’t been alone since we got here and maybe that was for good reason because obviously we couldn’t handle that if–”
“You’re rambling,” he interrupts.
You take a deep breath. 
“I told him I loved him,” you push out before you can regret admitting it. It sounds even worse spoken out loud.
“And?” He asks, skeptically.
You blink in surprise at his reply. “And he, well, he didn’t say it back.”
You avoid his gaze and bring your knees to your chest and nibble on your thumbnail anxiously, waiting for Baekhyun’s response to the new detail. You must have rendered him speechless, because he remains silent. Either that, or he’s trying to figure out the best way to let you down on Chanyeol’s behalf. That makes you stiffen your shoulders, bracing yourself for the cold dose of reality. It never comes, and his lack of response drags until you think you’re going to explode.
Finally, you whip your head up to him exasperatedly just to see him looking at you like you’re the dumbest bitch he’s ever seen.
“What?” You snap, hating how condescending his expression is.
He rolls his eyes at your tone and lets out a laugh coated in disbelief, rubbing his forehead. “I love you, but you’re stupid.”
“I know,” you sulk, pouting as you rest your chin on your knees. “I wasn’t thinking straight, obviously. I got too caught up in the moment. Being with him like that, it brought me back to the good ol’ days, when we were falling in love. But, we’re not in college anymore. We’re not the same people we were when we were together.”
You furrow your brows, really trying to untangle your thoughts. It’s a lot easier to do with someone to look at.
“That’s what it is. I mean, how can I still love a man I don’t know? I can still have lingering feelings for the man I used to know, though. Maybe having sex was a good thing? All that leftover tension between us can finally rest. Yeah, that’s what last night was–left over tension. Now that we’ve done the deed, we should be good now. Sure, we still need to have a talk, there’s still some things we need to address to fully move on, but I think the hardest part has passed.”
You search your friend’s face for the right answer. “Right?”
His lips thin and then he’s sighing. “Do you want to know what I think?”
You nod miserably, thoughts too chaotic to decipher any logic.
Baekhyun stands up and walks over to you, reaching out to rub your arms comfortingly. In a gentle murmur he says, “I think you need some breakfast.”
A surprised chuckle leaves you as you lean forward, resting your forehead against his stomach. “You’re probably right.”
You relax under his touch, and you both stay like that. His hands go from your shoulders to your back, rubbing soothing circles onto your skin. The repetitive trail makes you drowsy.
The door swings open.
“I thought I heard you co–OH MY GOD!”
Seulgi stands dumbfounded at the door, the hand not frozen on your door knob covers her hanging jaw. Shock coloring her face as she takes in the compromising sight before her.
Baekhyun stumbles quickly away from you, tripping over his feet in his haste.
“It's not what it looks like!” You defend. That’s literally the worst line you can possibly say to her.
“What the hell!” She squeaks. “What the fuck is happening right now!?”
“We were just about to get something to eat!” Baekhyun says, as if that explains anything.
“HUH?!” Seulgi starts fanning her reddening face. She turns to you, not even going to humor him. “Look, I know this weekend has been rough for you. I understand you wanting to distract yourself by getting underneath someone. But, to sleep with Baekhyun of all people–”
“Hey!” The man in question barks. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Seulgi, please,” you beg. Crawling off the bed, you stumble over to her. “That’s not what happened at all!”
Your words go through one ear and out the other as she glares at Baekhyun, who’s shivering in his metaphorical boots under her judging stare. “I can’t believe you would do this! Chanyeol is your best friend! Do you not care how this will affect him when he finds out?”
“We didn’t do anything,” you plead.
“Then explain what I just walked into! Explain why you look a damn mess! And are those–are those hickeys?”
“I HAD SEX WITH CHANYEOL!” You yell in her face.
“I–wait, what?” You can see the internal conversation she’s having with herself as she tries to comprehend what you just confessed to her. When your words have meaning, a look of sheer horror contorts her lovely features.
“You didn’t.” Her voice is low, threateningly so.
You gnaw at your bottom lip, even more anxious than when Baekhyun was questioning you. 
Your silence is an admission and she yells your name accusingly.
“I know!” You agree. “Please, I know!”
“I don’t understand. How? Why? I thought you were over him, or at least trying to be. I–”
“Hey,” Baekhyun cuts her off, joining your little party. He rests a hand on her shoulder. “Let’s let her take a shower and get into some clothes that don’t have cum stains on them. Then we can get breakfast. She can explain everything then.”
“There’s no cum on my dress,” you mumble with a frown.
“I know Chanyeol’s kinks,” Baekhyun says. You huff in defeat.
Seulgi’s cat shaped eyes bounce back and forth between you both skeptically. You can see all the questions she has running through her pretty head.
“Alright,” she reluctantly agrees. “Hurry and get ready. I’m starving.”
You have a feeling it’s not food she’s hungry for.
Baekhyun leads her out of your room, throwing you an apologetic look, and you wonder how many more times he’s going to look at you like that.
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Nearly an hour later, you find yourself in a little unassuming mom and pop restaurant. Baekhyun’s grandmother lives on the island, so he knows all the local hot spots. The ajumma serving you is absolutely thrilled to see him, promising to put a bit more love in your food, which you can definitely taste upon your first bite. It is exactly what you need after the active night you’ve had.
“Yerim made it home safely,” Seulgi informs, not glancing up from her plate as she does.
Your lips thin at the mention of her sister, knowing she’s bringing her up on purpose.
You didn’t need her reminder. Yerim has been on your mind all morning.
“Yeah?” You finally answer. “Glad to hear. I’m sure she’ll hate me for good once she finds out what I did right after she left.”
“She’ll get over it,” Baekhyun is quick to dismiss.
“She’ll forgive you,” Seulgi allows. “But she’ll never forget.”
Leaning back, she finally gives you a sharp look. “What happened last night anyway?”
Luckily, you just so happen to scoop some food into your mouth when she asks that, so you take advantage and slow down your chewing. Aiming to enjoy every last bit, because you know it’s going to be the last time you’ll be able to. You swallow it down with some water, for good measure, taking your time chugging it empty. 
Seulgi watches in amusement, knowing what game you’re playing.
“Well,” you start, scratching behind your ear. “As you both already know, Chanyeol and I hooked up last night.”
“Hooked up?” Seulgi clarifies incredulously. It’s an interesting choice of words to describe what the two of you did.
Beside her, Baekhyun shakes his head, but keeps his opinions to himself, allowing you the floor.
“Yeah. And I want to say, for the record, that it was spontaneous. We just so happened to bump into each other when I was on my way back to the room. He asked me if I wanted to go to his room instead and I said yes–innocently! We were planning on just talking. And I mean, we did talk a bit?”
“Did you talk about Yerim?” Seulgi asks.
“No….” You avoid her stare and sink into your chair.
“Did you talk about your breakup?”
“No….”
Her eyes narrow. “So, what did you talk about?”
“About the wedding,” you answer like it’s obvious.
“And now it all makes sense.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” You pout.
“The two of you have been tiptoeing around each other all weekend. I thought it was just the awkwardness of seeing an ex–in your case, an ex dating your friend. But I misread it. Now it’s pretty obvious that if it weren’t for Yerim, you would’ve probably slept with him sooner. It wasn’t awkwardness I felt, it was tension…the sexual kind.”
Your frown deepens. Were you seriously that weak? You thought you did a pretty damn good job resisting Chanyeol, but it only took three days to fall into his sheets. That wasn’t very strong of you at all. Seulgi is right. Yerim was the main reason for you keeping your distance, not your pride or your past. She had only been gone a few hours before you gave into him.
“Does that make me a terrible person?” You quietly ask.
“I don’t think so,” Baekhyun answers simply, shrugging when you lock eyes.
“It doesn’t,” Seulgi agrees, although she lets out a tired sigh right after. “But I still don’t understand why? It’s been years, girl, and you’ve never mentioned him once in that time. It’s been a while since you got laid, and even longer since it was with Chanyeol. Old habits die hard, and you didn’t get the closure you wanted, but sleeping with your ex seems so out of character for you.”
“He’s not just some ex, Seulgi,” Baekhyun intervenes. “He’s her ex fiance, and they didn’t break up on bad terms, necessarily. There’s still love there.”
“I wouldn’t go that far,” you interject, shifting in your seat uncomfortably. 
“So, it was just an old attraction? Old habits and all that?” Seulgi asks.
“I think so,” you say and she seems to melt in relief. “I think it was just left over sexual tension, and now that we’ve got it out of our system, we can be normal. We can move on.”
Baekhyun doesn’t seem convinced. “And you’re sure Chanyeol will agree with you?”
You shrug. “I don’t see why not. It was just sex.”
“It’s never ‘just sex’ with Chanyeol, and you know that. Especially when it comes to you.”
“You’d be surprised,” you mutter, mood dampening at the memory.
He doesn’t hear you. “And I know you’re lying. Didn’t you tell him you loved him last night?”
You glare at Baekhyun and he answers it with a smug smile, knowing he just set you up.
“You did what now?” Seulgi asks deadpan.
Internally you wince. “I might have told him I loved him while in the throes of passion.”
She says your name disapprovingly. 
“And you know what? He didn’t say it back. So, you see? It was nothing more than physical for him as well.”
Seulgi looks as though she has some words for you, but Baekhyun beats her to the punch.
“You both drive me insane,” he groans. “It’s obvious you both still care about each other, what’s the point of trying to talk yourself out of it? It’s never too late to try again, and trust me when I say Chanyeol wants to more than anything. He’s already asked you for a second chance. He wants this! He wants you!”
“He said all that when he was drunk off his mind, Baekhyun.”
“Doesn’t make it any less true!”
You groan and lean your head back against your chair, feeling the pressure of the world falling onto your shoulders. It hits you then, the weight of Chanyeol’s affection, and for a moment you’re back on that sidewalk, drowning in it. You remember why you left, remember the moment your love for him twisted into something dark. Chanyeol said you told him you hate him. Truth is, you had. With him back in your life, you forgot about that, forgot that there was another reason why you were trying to avoid him. Again, everything is even more confusing, and you find yourself at a total loss of what to do next.
“It’s okay to feel overwhelmed by that,” Seulgi reassures. She knows you way more than you give her credit far. “Everything is happening so fast. You don’t have to make a decision right now, and honestly, I don’t think it’s wise for you to.”
You lift your head back up and take in your concerned friends. With the way they’re both sitting on either side of each other before you, it’s almost like they’re the angel and devil on your shoulders. One speaks for your heart, while the other speaks for your mind. Holding onto each of your hands and yanking you back and forth like a rope in tug-o-war. 
“I don’t know the right answer,” you whisper, feeling your eyes water in frustration.
“Whatever’s going to make you happy,” Baekhyun answers simply.
You cough a laugh and a tear escapes, but you’re quick to wipe it away.
“I think,” Seulgi begins, reaching over and grabbing your hand. “You should give each other space, and wait until you’re back in Seoul. It’s only a couple days, and it’ll give both of you time to figure out what exactly it is you want from each other. Do you have an idea of what that is? Is it a relationship? Closure? Or just physical connection?”
“I’m not sure,” you admit.
She tilts her head and raises her eyebrows. You understand. She’s right.
“That’s probably the best idea,” you relent.
Baekhyun grunts in disgust. “Doesn’t Chanyeol deserve a say in this?”
“Of course he does,” you say.
“But that’s a conversation for later,” Seulgi intrudes. “Preferably with others around.”
You lift your hands up in defeat. 
Now that your problem has been solved for now, you all go back to eating in a comfortable silence. Everything still tastes amazing, thank fuck.
Suddenly, Baekhyun straightens and turns to Seulgi. “What did you mean earlier anyways? When you said me of all people?”
She scoffs. “Besides the fact that you’re a weirdo? You’re Chanyeol’s best friend. If you had slept together, it would be the deepest betrayal to him. But, if she had slept with any of you, my reaction would be the same. The only other person I could possibly see her with is Sehun, and even then….”
“Ew,” you both finish.
“I love all of you,” you say. “But not like that.”
“It’s the same for me too!” Baekhyun admits. “I would never do that to Chanyeol, because I would never do that, period. Don’t ever put that disgusting idea in anyone’s head again!”
“No problem!” Seulgi says, resolute.
You finish breakfast soon after that and leave for the hotel. Today is the first day of your little             reunion tour. Sehun figured that everyone would be too hungover to do anything that required movement, so you’re all just going to hang out at the beach and watch the sunset. Sounds like the perfect Sunday to you.
You all left your phones in the car, so the first thing you do once buckled up is check your notifications, reading the texts in the groupchat confirming some of the others were heading out to the beach and the location they chose. Baekhyun winces as he scans his device, catching your attention. When you lock eyes, he gives you that pitiful smile, almost like a warning, before turning his screen for you to read. It’s filled with texts and missed calls from Chanyeol.
“Oh boy,” is all you can muster, trying not to linger too much on the only message you can read: ‘please. I’m begging’.
“What’s up?” Seulgi asks from the backseat. Baekhyun proceeds to show her his phone and she shakes her head in dismay.
“Should I call him?” He asks.
“No,” you’re quick to reply. Avoiding his gaze, you settle into your seat, staring blindly out the windshield. You feel him watching you for a moment before sighing and starting the car, pulling out to drive you back to the hotel.
The elevator ride is long. You wonder if Chanyeol will be in the hallway when it opens. Baekhyun leans against the wall, rapidly firing off texts the whole way up. It takes everything in you not to ask him what he’s telling Chanyeol to calm him down. 
The doors open, and you’re both relieved and crushed to enter an empty hall. Baekhyun walks you both to your room, which is polite, but you all know is a front. His room isn’t on this floor, and you don’t need him to walk you back.
“Where are you going?” You can’t help but to ask.
He grins guiltily and nudges his head towards Chanyeol’s room. “I’m going to check on him. That’s why I came up here in the first place.”
“Right….”
He pats your shoulder. “Get ready and head down to the beach. I’m sure you got Jongdae’s text in the groupchat. Both him and Jongin are already setting up camp.”
“Don’t take too long,” Seulgi says in farewell before pulling you into the suite.
As soon as the door closes, she’s holding you by the shoulders, staring deep into your eyes. “You can’t go back on your word now.”
“I’m not,” you say, cringing as the way it sounds like a lie.
Her grip on you tightens. “It’s all going to work out. Don’t get all sulky.”
“I’m not.”
She smiles. “You’re such a terrible liar. It’s kind of cute.”
“Stop flirting with me,” you sigh, grabbing her hands to hold them instead. “I’m going to take your advice. We need space.”
“Space,” she repeats approvingly, rubbing your knuckles with her thumbs.
Banging on your door causes you both to jump.
“Yeol, stop it! I already told you they’re not there!”
“I need to know for sure.”
You swallow thickly at the sound of Chanyeol’s voice.
You hear Baekhyun sigh and then Chanyeol call your name, which jerks you closer to the door. Seulgi grips your hands harder, holding you back. You lock eyes. She shakes her head in warning.
“Are you in there?” He pauses briefly, waiting for you to reply. You hold your breath, afraid in the silence he can hear your heart’s rapid beating. “Please, open the door, Mel. I just… I just need to see you.”
His voice is calm, but alarmed, as if he’s trying not to sound as desperate as he feels. He knocks again, the reps urgent, giving away the worry he’s trying to disguise.
“I just need you to tell me everything’s okay.” Now his voice cracks.
Fuck it. You can’t avoid him forever. You go to open the door, but Seulgi’s hold is surprisingly strong and you can’t break it.
“Space, remember?” She whispers.
You didn’t know that started now. 
Reluctantly, you relax, leaning your head on Seulgi’s shoulder. She wraps her arms around you, rubbing your back as you wait for Baekhyun to do his job in getting Chanyeol away.
“I can’t do this again, man,” Chanyeol’s broken voice comes through the door. “I can’t lose her again. Not like this.”
“I know, Dude.” Baekhyun sounds just as helpless, and a wave of guilt washes over you from putting him in this position. “But, she’s not in there. Let’s go to my room so I can change. It won’t take long, so don’t even think of ditching me!”
A silence drags on for so long you’re sure they’ve left. 
“Chanyeol?” Baekhyun urges.
“I–okay. Let’s go.”
You hear them retreat and let out a breath.
Seulgi whistles. “Quite the mess you’ve made.”
You swallow the lump in your throat. “You can say that again.”
“Hey,” She rubs your arm. “He’s going to be fine. Let’s change. I’m sure you’re now very eager to get down there.”
You let her lead you to your room. The whole time you can’t get over the pain in Chanyeol’s voice, a pain that you caused.
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olderthannetfic · 1 year ago
Note
https://olderthannetfic.tumblr.com/post/733536361807806464/you-know-what-medical-pet-peeve-i-kind-understand
To "answer" the first point: I know why it's a requirement, that's why I started of with "I kind understand it but I still find it stupid and hate it." I could have made it clearer that I know exactly why, but I didn't want to spend too much time on it. But to elaborate, when I was told about the requirement to take birth control, I also got an entire 10 page A4 pamphlet with every side effect and explanation as to what to expect, and what/why I'd need to do, and why I'd need to take birth control. I understood the reasoning they gave, but I also found it dumb because I'm just not in the "risk" category because I simply do not engage in any activities that could result in a pregnancy, nor would I have an interest in carrying one out if it still magically happened. Sorry Jesus 2.0. Also, I'm not in the US, and where I am abortions are legal and accessible.
As to the IUD thing. The dermatologists I spoke to, two of them, said that even if I did use a IUD I'd still be required to take birth control because it might fall out, and they also said that it's an issue of them having to prescribe the birth control together with the Isotretinoin. Basically the birth control and the acne medicine would have to be prescribed by the same doctor as a confirmation that I'm not doing it without birth control, and since they don't do IUD's it wouldn't "count" even if it was a valid option, which it isn't. No clue what happens if another doctor already prescribes a patient Birth control.
As to just not taking the birth control, I actually don't know what they'd do if you don't take the birth control, best case they don't care, worst case they might just deny me from getting the medicine I actually want I guess. I also don't know if the piss test also covers checking for the birth control, what I do know is that it tests for pregnancy, and you also get a blood test to test the liver status. Idk what more it does, I don't remember everything from the pamphlet.
There were no notes on what happens if you still get pregnant even if you're on the BC, I'm guessing you'd be taken off Isotretinoin. Not sure, didn't ask, I'm not planning on getting pregnant so it wasn't a question on my mind.
Also since I'm already talking about the pamphlet. If you are a woman, a person with an uterus, or are listed as female like on your birth certificate, you have to take birth control. Which was kinda funny because it seems to cover everyone except cis men. Menopause, transmen, even if you've had your tubes tied/hysterectomy you'd have to take it. And trans women, though I'm not sure if that was just a "cover our asses" and you don't actually have to take it if you have medical proof of being a transwoman.
It's honestly just very frustrating because I understand the reasoning, but it also makes people like me completely unable getting a treatment which could help me with a giant insecurity and give me a quality of life upgrade, just because I can't take birth control without giant side effects that could make my life much worse. Just because some people decided to fuck around and find out. It feels kinda like I'm being punished and forced towards a basically impossible choice, because of the dumb choices of others.
You know, just because some people are dumb, they ruin it for everyone who's not dumb.
TMI originally I took birth control to try and fix my skin, which is why I know the side effects on my body and stopped. I remember at some point in my teens my insecurity was so bad, and my mental health, if I had been given the information of this medication that could help me and then been basically told that I can't take it unless I again take a medication that I know causes me so much pain and I think I might have done something to myself. Like I mentioned when using birth control I had "bloating, nausea, periods , weight fluctuation, itchy for some reason, one even made me leak and then my breasts got so badly inflamed wearing a shirt was agony..." to add and explain it made my periods worse, including cramping and instead of helping with my skin it actually made that worse. I have no idea why birth control made me itchy but it also ended up with me constantly have welts all over my body because I kept scratching, maybe it somehow made me my skin more sensitive and "thin". I tried a few birth controls because my doctor back then tried to find one that worked, and none of them did.
--
You could be allergic to anything in the pills from the actual hormones to the dyes, though this description does sound like online descriptions of reactions to synthetic progesterone. Very annoying.
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a-tame-brat · 2 years ago
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Apparently I have an egg-nancy kink now. Thanks a lot, @eggedbellies. Now all I can think about is being a freelance incubator.
Anyway, here's a couple thousand words that spawned from an anon ask I saw. Eggs, non-humans, oviposition, egg laying, mind-altering. IDK. Probably not for everyone, so read at your own risk.
I’ve carried eggs for several species, from squishy little amphibian eggs that make my womb feel like a stress ball before they hatch inside me, to little clutches of leathery reptilian eggs; I’ve even carried a few hard-shelled eggs that come out over the course of a few days and, once, a massive dragon egg that took me a month to recover from. I charge extra for dragons now. My policy is to let the parents decide how much they want to be involved; my contracts stipulate that I’ll stay in good physical health and not do or eat anything that might harm the eggs, but I’m perfectly capable of handling each incubation and laying by myself. (I’m not proud of it, but I’ve used the phrase “strong independent incubator who don’t need do parents” more than once). And it’s a good gig; the pay is incredible, the oviposition is usually amazing, and the laying- god, there’s nothing like my cunt stretching around an egg, nothing like the squirmy feeling of live young crawling out of me.
But this client… ugh. I’ve never carried for her species before, and this girl got her eggs fertilized gods only know where- and I don’t think she has any idea what to expect. The deposition was pleasant enough, with 18 good-sized eggs squeezing through my cunt and cervix to fill my womb with that perfect weight, but she’s been a pain in my ass ever since. It’s her first clutch, you see, and she’s hovering over me like it’s my first, too. Every time I try to stand up, she’s telling me to rest. Girl, I need to stretch my legs! Use the can! Get fresh air! Eventually, I’ll probably get the urge to settle into the nest she’s trying to build me, but for now? I’m not so heavy I can’t walk, and I’d rather be home with a book. But, she’s the client, and the pay is pretty good. At least she’s cute, and her ovipositor is better than a cock. That is a definite benefit. She loves fucking me with it, feeling her tip nudging against my plugged cervix. And my friends think I’m an idiot for complaining about laying around being fed and cleaned and doted on all day. She doesn’t know how long the clutch needs to incubate, though, so I’m a little peeved. On the application, she said it was just two months, but I’ve been gravid for two and a half now! I had a regular client who was planning to use my services, but this client made me miss the deadline. I liked that other client! Easy eggs, very hands-off until the laying. But no. I’m stuck with this clueless newbie.
I can feel the change. The eggs feel heavier somehow, they feel ready. I’ve commandeered the my client built for me and transformed it to my needs, and I’m a lot more willing to accept her help with my day to day needs. It took a lot longer than I expected- months longer. At least the sex is good. And she’s really not so bad, she just wants to be a good mother, and take good care of her incubator. But then, during a lazy morning fuck, her tip plunges through my cervix. I’m completely calm. It’s laying time, nothing I haven’t done before. But my client… she’s a wreck. You’d think she was about to squeeze out a couple dozen hard-shelled eggs, not me! I get onto my hands and knees and tell her to get ready to catch, since that’s what she wants to do. Bless her, she even licks my cunt while the first egg passes through my cervix and out my channel. The stretch is delicious, it’s just right, and I climax right when the large end pressed against my clit. I might have to contract with her again for the next batch. Eggs just a little bigger than a chicken egg are, frankly, my favorite to lay. Once the first egg is safely deposited in the nest, she returns and fucks me until she feels the next egg against the tip of her ovipositor. She’s so caring, so enthusiastic, I can almost forgive her for the incessant hovering. She just wants her babies to be safe.
We’re five eggs in when I realize that something’s not quite right. Each egg stretches me just as much as the first one. I mean, I usually loosen up after the first few, but these feel like the very first one each time. And my belly is still just as big as it was before. Usually, I’d start to feel my skin relaxing, getting soft and saggy instead of taut and stretched as the clutch empties out. But… that’s not happening. I jokingly ask if the eggs are getting bigger and almost shit myself when she says that they are. Then, she has the gall to ask if eggs aren't supposed to get bigger.
No, no they’re not! That’s never happened to me! It’s supposed to get easier as I lay, not harder! But she brings the newest egg up for me to see, and damn if it’s not a fucking goose egg, big as a softball. I’m panting with the effort of holding myself up at this point, but I manage to gasp at the size of it. And there’s so many more inside me still!
By the twelfth egg, the damn things are as big as an emu egg and I’m slumped over a small mountain of pillows instead of trying to hold myself up. Fuck, this is going to be the dragon egg all over again! My hips feel loose, my pelvis has relaxed, but I’m not sure I can keep doing this. She’s telling me that there’s six more eggs! My panic seems to be rubbing off on her, and she’s licking and fingering my gaping cunt like there’s no tomorrow. And it’s helping, it is, being blissed out with pleasure usually makes things easier, but it might be better if I just had a minute alone to breathe. But when I try to ask her to leave me alone, she bursts into tears. She can’t leave me alone, I’m her precious incubator! She’s going to take care of me, and I don’t have to worry. That alone worries me. After the eggs are out and I’ve recovered enough to take care of myself again, I’m going home. Take a little holiday, rest up, and find my next client. Maybe an amphibian this time- much smaller eggs. The next egg breaches my cervix and I’m wailing in pain, then pleasure as the massive shell pushes against my clit's internal nerves before it’s even all the way into my vagina. I feel liquid dripping down my legs from the gush of slick I’ve produced mixing with my cum. But my client licks it all up like it’s the most precious, delicious ambrosia, kisses at my stretching lips, massages my taint to keep it from tearing.
She says it's the last egg. My precious mate had been with me through every moment of this incubation and labor, and I can't imagine doing it without her. She promises me that she'll get me through this, "this" being an egg bigger than that fucking dragon egg. I know she will, I know it. At this point in my labor, I'm sweating buckets. My love keeps my face clean, though, keeps the sweat out of my eyes even as she fingers my gaping channel and works the egg through my cervix. It hurts so badly that I think I must have torn, but then the egg feels so good, so perfect while it passes through me. My pussy lips do tear a little, but my darling soothes the pain with her tongue, pressing on my belly to help. I'm worried that I'll be too stretched to recover fully, but she promises that I'll recover, and that she'd never want another incubator even if I did stay loose. She tells me how perfect I am, how she never could have hoped for such a big egg out of a human, that I was made to be hers. I was, I think. I know I'm delirious from pleasure and pain, but I don't care. I believe her. I never want anyone but her to touch me again, no one else's eggs will ever swell my belly. I love her, I can never be away from her again! The final egg slides out and I clench around nothing, feeling utterly empty. My mate caresses my face, my cunt, my whole body, tells me how perfect I am, and kisses the tears from my face. She'll never leave me alone. I was meant to come to her, all the others were just practice for this. Just preparation for us to be together, for me to be hers, her perfect incubating mate. She can't wait to raise our children together.
Our eggs are all out, curing in the warm air. They should hatch in a few days, and I’ll get to meet my sweet babies. My mate- I can’t believe I ever thought of her as just a client- is holding me carefully. She put my hips back into joint while I was still blissed out from the last egg, and she’s got her ovipositor resting in my cunt, waiting to feel me tighten up around her. My cervix is still so stretched out that her squishy tip actually sits inside my empty womb. I tried to convince her to fill me up right away, that I don’t feel right without her eggs inside me, but she insists that I heal fully first. She doesn’t want me to hurt, not unless it’s from the glorious stretch of our eggs. She needs me healthy if I’m going to carry another clutch each year, after all. In fact, our next clutch is almost ready for fertilization, and she’s going to bring me with her to meet the new sperm donor. She says they have wonderful cocks, even better than her ovipositor, and she wants to see me stuffed with cock, high on their hallucinogenic sperm. I have my doubts about anything being better than her ovipositor, but if it will make her happy, I’ll do anything. She’s usually right about everything, after all. She was right about me belonging to her.
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domoriu · 20 days ago
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THE PIERCING JEWLERY IS SOO CUTE!!! i love the butterfly n the colorful ones 🙂‍↕️ also that sushi looks bomb asf omg
i want a lot of the same ones u said actually :O i dont have very many at all rn </3 i plan on fs getting both nostrils, septum, 4 more lobe piercings, an industrial, n then like multiple helix piercings!! i also want my ears like.. completely covered in piercings lolz n then im thinking abt the vertical labret/labret & a belly piercing (i been thinking abt getting my nipples pierced too But 👁️👁️ im very on the fence abt that alskdk)
i have a rook piercing which is a pain in the ass to heal so im holding off until that one heals but other than my lobes thats the only piercing i have n i dont even rly count my lobes bc my mom got those pierced when i was a baby
-🪼
the butterfly nose ring was like the main reason i bought that pack like its so cute i needed it real bad 😫 and the sushi was SOOOOO good im still thinking about it rn
i only have my lobes pierced and i feel like my ears are so boring rn bc of that like i want like 2 more lobe piercings (i think my lobe can only fit around 3/4 but idk) and a lot of helix piercings… i thought ab getting an industrial but i know thats just gonna be like hell trying to heal and ik id fuck it up so bad 😭😭😭
and i say you should totally get the vertical labret/labret its such a cute piercing and it honestly didn’t even really hurt rhe only part that hurt was the clamp + the jewelry going through… like id rate it 6/10 on the pain scale and id just say think a lot about if you want the labret or vertical labret cuz they’re both cute but depending on how u want it to look/ if you dont want the piercing to actually be in your mouth (which is why i did the vertical labret) but some ppl dont like how theres a ball at the bottom of your lip so its all about preference <3
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the-scarlet-witch-22 · 29 days ago
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OKAY SO AGATHA FINALE.
Hear me out here…(spoilers of course)
Agatha could pick up her brooch, right? So she can interact with things in the living world. She’s a quick study, our witch.
Poor Y/N…thinking Agatha’s in eternity with her toxic ex…
Clearly Agatha has other plans..
If you think I’m not going somewhere naughty with this…I am so sorry to disappoint. 🫣
ANYWAY! Cannot wait to hear your thoughts on the finale! I hope you’re having a lovely night!
-🌸
I’m honestly sooooo excited for ghost!Agatha, marvel needs to get a move on immediatelyyyy and get her transparent ass back in that studio.
I have actually been thinking of doing a ghost Agatha one shot at some point….. and I really love that idea tbh 😭 I cried soooo much during the finale my god. Like bawling my eyes out- had to drink so much water after hahaha.
I genuinely really enjoyed the finale. A lot of people are upset, and I understand some of it, but I don’t understand a good portion of it. Mainly the shippers… I’ve been saying from the beginning that Rio and Agatha’s relationship was pretty much in the past. I think some people were confused by the middle episodes (the near kiss, the broom scene) but I never got those vibes… to me it was always a rather realistic portrayal of ‘what happens when you are forced to be around your ex that you share xyz history with’.
I love a good sapphic ship, I really do. I also enjoyed agathario quite a bit… but I liked it for what it was. They were never going to get back together imo. Too much has happened and it would be so unrealistic and out of character for Agatha in particular for there to have been any sort of reconciliation.
I don’t really overshare that much on here but I did some reflecting and their dynamic reminds me of a few relationships I’ve had over the years. It’s almost painful to be in their presence again, just because of the hurt and pain. There’s still love of course, in some of those instances, but that doesn’t erase everything else that happened. So it was kind of nice for me personally to see that in a sapphic relationship being highlighted idk
I think people say they like toxic yuri until it’s actually toxic tbh.
I’m rambling a bit- I’m actually driving with my friends to eras ahh. So I apologize because this def is not cohesive but alas. I hope you’re well and thank youuu for the ask! If you ever wanna discuss the show I’m always down 💜🙂‍↕️
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gnar-slabdash · 2 years ago
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Leverage Mark Showdown -- Second Heat Contestants
Where the nominator left comments (or fun extra descriptors), I'm including their comments, cause those are way better than what I'd come up with. Where they didn't leave comments, you'll have to settle for mine :P
Jack Lattimer The Radio Job, The Last Dam Job (also sort of most of Season 4) Hes a background guy, just barley staying relevant but also managing to be a pain in the ass to Nate and the crew, but he's not as much of a threat as Damien Moreau, but still stays in the background disrupting htings and giving the crew a hard time purely beciase he wasts a few extra bucks. Hes a bad gys that feels realistic an investor who found a way to cheat the system to benefit himself.
Jimmaaay Jimmy Jimmy Ford The Three Card Monte Job go grandpa
Dr. Anne Hannity The Inside Job That cocky/confident shit is hot... Except for the part where she manufactures a famine. But every time she thought she had a trump card she was sexy af
Dalton Rand The Future Job he's the worst kind of loathsome esp bc he's the most directly confronted with the harm he's doing and is totally blase about it
Nicky & Heather Moscone The Wedding Job They're both great caricatures and I like that they double cross each other.
Alan Foss The Two-Horse Job He’s one of the most well-sold “cartoonishly evil immature dickbag“ characters  we encounter. I love his arrogance, his uber-hateable sexism, and the over the top reactions he makes are so much fun to watch him get angry about. Damien Moreau, "IF WE MUST" The Big Bang Job, The San Lorenzo Job - specifically for the bathrobe and flipflops and being carefully staged to not look like everyone around him is normal human size, bless him - silly charming terrifying bastard man. can't believe this hasn't been done yet.
Retzing & Sons The Snow Job Dysfunctional crime family getting synergistically worse the more they try to deal with each other. Also I get excited every time I see my boy Jonathan from Buffy
Meredith The Lonely Hearts Job Man, she actually almost did our heroes in, didn't she? I love her grudging respect for Sophie, like she is genuinely into the art of grifting and willing to acknowledge being bested
James Kanack The First Contact Job He could have just been another rich and successful asshole. But no, that wasn't enough for him. HE HAD TO TALK TO ALIENS.
Mitchell Kirkwood The Studio Job Dude was a charming psycho, I'd let him murder me for my songs 😍 Plus watching his face break was 😚 Divine 😚
Hugh Whitman The Gone Fishin' Job Yeah, you know, let's do some regular debt collection fraud and also fund an entire militia out in the woods behind the bank, that seems normal, right?
Larry Duberman The Reunion Job what if there was a nerd who had sometbing sooooooooo wrong with them. also his actor was in big eden i got really excited when i recognized him
Wendy Baran The Gimme a K Street Job - okay I cave, you got me with this one. You're gonna have to send some propaganda, cause the nominator didn't say anything and i literally remember nothing about this character except she thinks breaking teenage girls' necks is a fun way to make money - Update! The nominator says: - Okay I said Baran bc I hate her so very much -  And she’s a girlboss (derogatory)
Andrew Grant The Miracle Job Love the energy, love the way he threw a wrench in their plans by being even more of a sleazy money grubber than they expected (and more creative about it!), and yeah, he's another one that I actually feel kinda bad for cause playing on his anxiety was LOW.
Irina Larenko The Stork Job She was such a ditzy cunt, I hated her but I loved watching her on screen. Kinda cute in a way idk plus her main muscle was kinda unfff
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firewoodwander · 2 years ago
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hello allow me to infect your brain with a polyship. After the war: Fives/Tup, Tup/Dogma, Dogma/Slick (potential Tup/Dogma/Slick or Fives/Tup/Dogma, but Fives and Slick are on sight)
(for additional fun and profit throw in Echo returns with his batch of badboyfriends)
this is for the pairing/smut trope/kink meme, but you know they might be too busy fighting about everything, for anyone to get laid 🤣
BCNCBSSJHS the Tru Poly Agenda is one of my favourite agendas and I’ve been thinking about tup and dogma (my ogs… my beloveds) already, so this is too good. Idk how to get [counts fingers] almost nine whole (lol) characters into a prompt fic but the thought is there
Wish you would write…
“I’m back!” Fives shouts into the house, letting the door slam shut behind him.
“Did you pass Slick on your way in?” Tup calls out. Dogma swears under his breath and jabs Tup in the ribs, but Tup only grins and wriggles a little bit in his lap to get away from sharp fingers.
“No,” Fives says, sounding immediately perturbed, “thank the stars. Why is that bastard still coming here?”
“Because he’s a pain in the ass,” Dogma drawls, at the same time Tup snorts a laugh and emphasises the phrase, “Because we like him,” like he would to a cadet.
“He’s an indicted felon!” Fives protests—an old argument. He wanders into the living room and finds them sprawled on the sofa. “A coward and a bastard,” he explains, leaning down distractedly to kiss Tup hello and Dogma on the top of his head, “and he blew up half the fucking base on Christophsis.”
“We weren’t even there,” Dogma mutters. He has his thumbnail between his teeth and he’s not paused reading the article on his datapad. Fives makes an irate noise. “Get over yourself.”
Tup swings his feet down to the floor and gets up to follow Fives and the crinkle of grocery bags into the kitchen. “Anyway—aren’t there more important things to discuss?”
“Always,” Fives agrees, his frown melting into a wide grin as he unpacks the fresh produce. “The Marauder is on course to make planet fall, ETA twenty-two-hundred hours. I picked up a few more bits than usual, we’ll have a late latemeal and an extra mouth to feed tonight!”
Fives’ joy is infectious. Tup finds himself grinning too as he absorbs it, wrapping himself around Fives’ back and making a great hindrance of himself, not that Fives seems to give a damn.
“More like five extra mouths,” says Dogma, finally following them in. He sets his datapad in its cradle and comes over to help pack away the food. He gets an extra jab in to Tup’s side with his elbow and a smirk; Tup sticks his tongue out at him.
Together they clear the counters. Tup washes and slices up a bowl of fruit for the three of them. Dogma takes the time to wipe down all the surfaces, and then gets carried away scrubbing the sink and then the hob while he’s at it. Fives watches, plying him with berries from time to time and planning what to make for Echo’s return.
“We’re going to need to move soon,” Tup announces suddenly.
Both Dogma and Fives pause in their heckling of each other and look towards him in askance.
“Well, as much as I like our flat… it’s kind of small?” Tup runs his hand along the length of the counter and makes it only a foot or so until his fingers find the edge of the sink. “And with the number of people coming and going, it’s not just ourselves that Dogma and I are thinking about, anymore.”
Dogma is already frowning off into the middle distance. Tup can practically see the thoughts cycling through his mind, discarded or tagged onto his list of priorities one by one. More bedrooms, for one. A bigger reception area. Maybe even an actual table to eat at, rather than finding pasta under the sofa cushions way later than they ever want to be finding it.
But then Fives asks “Are you inviting me to move in?” with a sly, and slightly shy little smile, and that snaps Dogma right out of it with a huff and a flick of a tea towel.
“Are you seriously being coy about that? You live here already, you dolt.”
Fives cackles, dodging Dogma’s next snap of the towel. He hides behind Tup, who smiles wryly and pats his shoulder.
“So? What do you think?”
Ever-indulgent, Dogma smiles over at him. It makes the vertex of his tattoo crinkle a little, just the way Tup loves.
“I think that would be wise,” he says, and lunges for Fives again. “Especially if we’re going to keep picking up strays.”
Tup reaches out and snatches Dogma by the waist, preventing him running after their hooting third. Dogma goes pliant in his hold and Tup squeezes him around the middle.
“Thank you,” he says, utterly sincere. Dogma twists to brush a kiss along his jaw.
“Of course.”
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lizthinspo · 6 months ago
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i keep thinking to myself just make it to the end of the year and then ur free to do whatever you please but until then we are crying and screaming my lungs out. isn’t it so funny how the only way i can feel ok is through being myself and driving around, bc that’s how i clear my head probably bc i wish there could be a reckless driver in my path that can pls kill me so i don’t ever have to go back home. i can’t go home. it’s like im not even wanted there, i know when im not wanted somewhere. it’s summer, MY summer, im supposed to be living, instead im crying thinking about ending my life, i feel like im losing control. the things that i used to make myself feel ok are being taken away from me daily. i feel like im going insane bc everything i do is somehow wrong or not what was needed of me and it hurts so much bc how else am i supposed to be alive and happy and ok if im not loved by myself and i hate myself inside and outside i feel like im not good enough for anybody, i feel like im the one person ppl always forget abt like when we’re in a public setting and with a bunch of ppl, i feel like im always the one to have been forgotten or left out. its a horrible feeling honestly bc I WAS THERE. i feel like i don’t deserve anything and i really don’t. but since ik these are my last few memories i want to make the most of them but im also scared of my mom and what she’ll say of me when im happy. and yes i smoke and drink and cvt but honestly i love smoking bc it takes away all of my pain and im left feeling nothing, ik it seems crazy but it makes me feel like im going to make it out alive and ok even for a split second but thats why im always smoking. bc you most def don’t help me feeling ok, you’re the reason why i never feel safe nor ok nor alive nor happy. i enjoy drinking bc im not gonna make it to 21 so im just getting to still experience it and also it makes me feel happy and danceful and full of joy but you always seem to take it away from me always and it truly sucks so much because sometimes i do really want to be happy w you bc you’re my mom. and i wanna be good for you but no matter what i do you can never truly appreciate anything i do. that’s why ive given up, bc you’re never gonna open ur eyes and actually see how much im trying. this summer i had so much planned! i was so hyped and excited abt it, you should’ve heard me all of senior year, talking abt how happy i was gonna be bc im free from school and im finally gonna be able to be me. idk what else you want from me, i wanna go out and have sleepovers and have friends and be out w them for hours on end and stay out late. you say i can’t go out bc im drinking but maybe if i went out more often without ur fucking mf bitch phone call on my ass every single minute. i wouldn’t be out drinking and smoking everyday as you probably think i do now bc i could actually experience happiness. and ykw my #1 rule is to never cvt myself for anyone else’s problems but i truly think that this one deserves one bc i think if she takes my car im actually gonna lost and idk what to do. i keep saying and telling myself to keep pushing for jared and jensen and misha but i don’t think i can bc im so tired and over everything i don’t wanna live anymore. i wanna slit my wrists or hang myself to my death bc i cannot bear the thought of you saying that you’re disappointed in me bc that shattered my heart and to just continue to tell me these awful things that i wish i could respond with just fucking kill me already FUCKING KILL ME! i’m sure that’s what she wanted to do either way. she says she’ll be here for whenever you need me but i don’t need you i’m fine without you in fact i’m better off without you. ik that my intentions are good for others not for myself bc everything i’ve heard come from your mouth i believe by the amount of times that you’ve told me the same things so much so that i start to believe it myself and that translates over to me hating myself constantly and not being able to experience having real friends and have a relationship and to just experience any from of love
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togalnu · 1 year ago
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Do you have any specific hcs for fem togainu or just fem nitrochi as a whole? I'd love to hear them! ^^
Oops I meant to answer this earlier. Anyways yes! I will be putting this under a read more because. Lol. Enjoy!
You wanna know a secret? Earlier this year I was researching parodies and the legalities of them because I had the grand idea to make a togainu remake but yuri and with some story changes. A whole ass visual novel. I was seriously planning on making it. Suffice to say I have put in some thought in turning these yaoi boys into yuri girls.
We will be here all day if I list every little thought and headcanon I have! I'll def make more posts about my visions in the future, but for right now I need to talk about Shiki. I NEED TO TALK ABOUT SHIKI.
First and foremost, my overall thoughts about Shiki: wasted potential. His route was a huge disappointment when I finally got to it. It was fumbled so fucking badly and it pains my soul because Shiki is hot and I love the concept of his character but.. man. What a let down. I ended up thinking about him a lot because of this. What I would do if I were in charge of writing his route, parts of his characterization that I'd rid of or ameliorate, and maybe even giving him some new quirks to not make him so one-dimensional-evil-villain type. And then along with this, I started thinking about what if he was a woman. because I am attractdd to women. Typical thought process.
First, his design. I am a sucker for black haired red eyes bitches. I love black and red. I'm dying my hair black and red at the end of the year. The majority of my wardrobe is black and red. I do not play around #EMO. I love the almost leather gothic look he has but unfortunately it is not enough for me. I felt that he needed more unnecessary accessories and belts and other clothing items, as any goth should have. I've had a few ideas in mind for Shiki girl outfit and they all lean into these more, like giving her extra bracelets, belts, necklaces, crosses, whatever. I want her DECKED OUT!!! But I also struggle coming up with outfits so I can't really decide what looks good LMAO
Things I love about Shiki's outfit:
- The gloves. UGHHH gloves are so fun. The longer the gloves are the better.
- His stupid coat
- The spikes and crosses. The silver adds a lot to his appearance
- Turtleneck<3
Things I don't like about Shiki's outfit:
- those stupid ass notches on his pants. I can't tell if he has insane thigh-high boots or strange pants, and neither can a lot of artists it seems like? Though it seems pants are the consensus. SAD!
- Turtleneck should have long sleeves
- Or his coat should have long sleeves. One of those two
- What the hell is going on with his belt. It'd look fine if it didn't have those strange hanging.. circle... things
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NOW MY IDEAS
I like the idea of her having a corset and fishnets, so I've been including that in whatever iteration of her design I'm working on. I gotta keep the coat too as it's like, a Shiki classic. I've also been trying to decide how a skirt for her might look (I love the idea of it having a slit so you can see her fishnets and thigh high boots).
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But I'm torn on including the turtleneck as much as I love it.... I feel like it kinda clashes. Idk maybe i should just move her skirt up so it's not hanging off her ass but also it's fun to draw it that way.
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Although adding another belt with the skirt could work too, and have the fishnets peaking out from the skirt slit... not gonna draw that rn though im just brainstorming here
Like I said earlier I'd love to give her way more accessories than base Shiki has but I need to definitely play around with outfit ideas more bc I don't want her to look too cluttered either. Also sorry all the pics are torso only because for some reason I struggle HARD with drawing calves and feet
I don't have much to say for hair ideas.. I just like the idea of it flairing out + two long.. idk what to call them... strands of hair? Down her cheeks?? Okay well u see what I mean in the pic. Bangs pretty much stay the same
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And ohhh my god I know togainu is set in the post-apocalyptic future, but considering it came out in 2005 I feel obligated to rework some of the designs to be a little more y2k.. Akira with low waisted flared jeans... making Shiki even more gothic... it's so fucking fun HOW CAN I NOT!!
Also the other day I saw this one corset that I LOVED and wanted to see if I can Shiki-fy it but hmm... idk... I definitely need to play around with the idea more but here's a quick sketch i did just for funsies so you get the idea
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Okay moving on
Second, his characterization. I love the idea of what they were going for in terms of his relation to Nano. I wish so badly they had expanded on this past Shiki just hating line users and killing them because he's unable to kill Nano (although I do think this is a pretty good bit of characterization). I'm pretty sure the Chayamachi manga goes more into this but idc we are talking about the game so I'm gonna pretend it doesn't exist.
Shiki is smug and cocky. Incredibly so. But a big part of his character is how hateful he is, so much so that it's this hate that motivates everything he does.
I love it. I love his hatred. I wish the game went more into it sooo badly and like if he found out Akira had anti-line blood before the end of the game and there was time given to show his reaction? Would he hate Akira for it??? Would he feel any kind of resentment?? If I was Shiki I'd definitely feel complicated as fuck over it!!!
Anyways I'm still working out how fem Shiki could be improved upon in terms of this, and I LOVEEE LOVE LOVE LOVE writing personality and backstories and relationships with other characters and how they all interact with each other. I have very deep oc lore because of this but i will not get into my ocs rn because they have nothing to do with togainu.
This post is already long enough however and if I were to talk about all the ideas I had for Shiki characterization upgrade... well it'd take even longer. To say the least. One day I'll talk about it though! In a more comprehensive post including other characters and whatnot. It's something I definitely also need to work out in my head more tho
It's been a pretty fun project so far that I hope to do more with in the future. Side note that doesn't really matter but there's this song that I always imagine fem Shiki amvs too oops.. RIDE IT by LustSickPuppy... this part especially.......
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(the part is around 1:17 if you don't feel like listening to the entire thing. But u should)
Urggghhhh I love lsp ugh ughhhhhfuhrhhcuuhfhuufghh sorry for posting lyrics and a spotify link. It will happen again
OKAY. AMYWAYS
I do not give a fuck if all of this seems too self indulgent. If anything it's supposed to be!!! It's a labor of love!!!
Thank u to anyone who read this far. I appateciate it
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villruu · 1 year ago
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👀
Oh man, I have like a LOT of wips (mainly DSMP and LMK) but there's this whole-ass pokemon fic series I have in my docs that's about submas. Basically, after an accident Emmet makes a deal w the devil to save Ingo from death, and as a consequence they get cursed into becoming zoruas whenever they dont know exactly when and where the other is. It has 8 fics planned and i have like 5 halfway or mostly written. The first fic is mostly written but a few scenes are missing and I'm just blocked on how to continue lmao
I am not sane in the slightlest about submas<3
snippet from the first fic under read more bc uh slight gore? And Angst? Idk
Emmet clinged to Ingo’s chest, feeling the small shift beneath his hands, and choked on the hatred burbling up inside.
There was too much blood, and Emmet had never thought himself as a squeamish person, but now, holding his injured twin, he barely managed to keep the bile down. He patted desperately for his belt, and choked up a sob as he noticed the broken  leather hanging from his pants. The belt must have gotten cut, and he could not see his pokemon anywhere near. Ingo also didn't have his, probably having been accidentally left behind in the cave above.
Desperation tried to make him move, but he felt every muscle locked up, as he felt Ingo’s blood flow between his fingers as he held his head as gently as he could. He didn’t know what to do, panic slowly obfuscating each option, until Emmet felt as if he were just a wild beast cornered against a wall, scrambling to survive. He would have stayed like that forever, if not for the pained weak whine of Ingo.
Emmet flinched, and without thinking anymore, he stood up with his twin in his arms and started to search for help. Adrenaline fueled him, and Emmet did not feel even an ounce of resistance, as he ran through the thick forest, hoping that the Universe had been kind to them and they had fallen towards the side of the mountain where civilization resided. Scratches and thorns started to decorate Emmet’s body, but he did not pause, in vain searching for help, for anyone, anything that would save his twin.
He sees a path, worn and old, and before he can question its state, he follows it, heartbeat tuning out everything around him except for Ingo’s shallow breaths against his neck, where Ingo had hidden his limp head as they ran in search of help. The path was more often than not covered in plants, but Emmet passed through, keeping a hand around Ingo’s hastily made tourniquet made of his jacket.
The path cleared out, and Emmet stumbled into a shallow clearing, a ring of thick forest surrounding it. 
There were only crumbling graves, erased through the rain, wind and age, a half destroyed statue erected in front of what appeared to be a bench. He stumbled, and deposited Ingo on the bench, tears obscuring half of his view. Emmet looked around, but not even pokemon were nearby, everything dead silent, not even wind daring to rustle the leaves on the trees.
“Please,” He rasped out, even despite knowing what would happen as he realized that civilization or help would never arrive, “Ingo, please.”
His brother just breathed, and that was all Emmet needed right now, for him to continue breathing. He collapsed in front of the bench, and sobbed, clutching at Ingo’s torn up sleeve, ignoring the way blood seeped onto the ground, painting everything in his brother’s essence.
Emmet knew they had fallen to the wrong side of the mountain, and the knowledge that no one would arrive for his brother felt almost too much. He wouldn’t last that long too, he could already feel the edge of pain drawing in, circling around, constricting his chest and making everything he saw blurry and faded.
“Stay alive,” He sobbed, wishing for once his face weren’t always a mockery of a smile, “Please, please, Ingo.”
Emmet had never been religious, had never put any stock into the Gods of this world, but Emmet set everything aside and closed his eyes, clutching Ingo’s cold arm, and prayed.
He prayed to whatever was out there, no words uttered, to anything, anyone to please, to please save his brother. He would do anything, anything for Ingo to live.
Wind swept through the clearing, what seemed like the beginnings of a storm gathering around them, but Emmet ignored everything, and continued to pray, fervently, no matter what.
“Anything?'' A distant voice came, and Emmet flinched, looking up to see…. Something, looking over both him and his brother.
“Please!” Emmet sobbed, “Ingo deserves to live!”
“He would not survive,” It said, its body a coiling mass that suffocated the sun above, “In this state, he is too far gone.”
“Then, then,.... I'll take it! I die in his stead, won’t that work?!” Emmet pleaded.
A rumbling not unlike an earthquake shook Emmet through his core, and he belatedly noticed it was just this thing’s laughter.
“You will not remain the same, my powers corrupt whatever it touches,” It said, its burning red eyes glaring into Emmet’s, “Would you be willing to sacrifice so much for your twin?”
“Always,” He breathed out, shaking but keeping firm his eyes onto the others, something telling him this was important, “For Ingo, I would do anything and everything. And he would do the same for me!”
“Very well,” It said, its face getting closer until it was barely a few centimeters away, “Through time and space, you shall prove your words.”
It got closer, and Emmet felt the faint sensation of something electric and colder than ice briefly touching his forehead.
“I can’t wait to see who you shall become,” It said, its long and coiling body surrounding both brothers, “Until we see again, Unovan Twins.”
That was the last thing Emmet heard, before his hearing turned into colors, he tasted electricity, and he fell into the most painful sensation he had ever felt, a glimpse of a World so far away and strange that could not be described before he fell unconscious, hand locked onto his brother’s arm.
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