#i’m probably just a tomboy

[charlieswanismydad]

i’m going to bed fuck this

[badolmen]

…there are twinks that can get pregnant. Some twinks want to get pregnant. Sometimes twinks are trans babe.

The problem is with cishet people appropriating queer language. A cishet person looking at a cishet guy and saying ‘he’s such a twink I want to get him pregnant’ is homophobic. They’re first and least of all applying a queer term to a non-queer person (who often doesn’t actually fit the physical description that term describes). More importantly it’s treating ‘twink’ the same way cishet (and to an extent, younger and less experienced queer) people have been treating sub/dom and top/bottom. They reinvent a strict dichotomy solely based on whatever they imagine those words mean because they aren’t actually kinksters or queer. In this case they’re conflating twinks with whatever they think subs are just because the cishet person wants to dominate a dude and in their mind ‘twink’ is just a quirky queer word for ‘subservient/bottom/etc.’

Just say you wanna fuck him stupid and stop using queer vocabulary without understanding what it means.

[lizard-on-a-window-pane]

5 times you and Miguel walked away from each other and 1 time you didn't

pairing: Miguel O'Hara x reader notes: brother'sbestfriend!Miguel, soccerplayer!Miguel, college au, slow burn, somewhat mutual pining but written from reader's perspective more exclusively, SFW - only slightly suggestive (worst thing is probably a boner), fem reader (pretty neutral though), saying soccer instead of football felt so dirty but oh well, thank you for reading!! word count: 5.9k

You’re having your first lazy day in forever. It’s the first day in recent memory that you didn’t have something to do or somewhere to be. You’re just going to hang out in your apartment and watch your favorite shows or read for fun for once or whatever else you feel like doing. Because you don’t have to go anywhere, you don’t even take a shower, opting to stay in your comfy pajamas, not bothering with any makeup or hair effort, as you lounge around. 

You have the place to yourself now, but you share it with your twin brother Alex, the two of you lucky enough to go to the same university. 

When you eventually hear his keys scratching at the door, you’re sprawled on the couch reading a novel you’d left half-finished for ages despite actually really enjoying it. School really had a way of making you not read. Or at least never full books. 

As Alex opens the door, you’re surprised to hear him talking to someone else. You see his unexpected guest a moment later from your spot on the couch, your college apartment rather small after all. And you’re mortified. Miguel. Alex’s best friend, university soccer team superstar, ridiculously attractive Miguel. 

God, why did Alex not warn you he was bringing someone over? All it took was a quick message, for fuck’s sake. And Miguel of all people? Ugh. Well, it wasn’t like you could tell him. “Hey, brother dear, I have a huge crush on your best friend, so can I please get a warning next time he’ll be around? You know, especially so I’m not looking like a total mess when he shows up?”

He’d been coming over a lot recently actually. He and Alex were both on the soccer team and happened to share a few classes too, so their schedules really lined up. Usually, it was nice to get to see him. It’s not like either of them paid that much attention to you when they were hanging out, but Miguel was nice to look at. Even now, they seemed like they were coming back from a casual soccer match or something, and he still looked amazing. His thick, dark hair was messy in the way that made you want to run your hands through it; his t-shirt hugged his unreasonably broad chest and shoulders perfectly, and his sweatpants — fuck, his sweatpants — his ass looked miraculous as he turned to put his gym bag down.

Miguel’s looking at you as he and Alex step into the living room. “It’s Saturday, Y/N, and the weather’s finally fucking nice. Why’re you reading a book? You’re such a nerd,” Alex snaps as he plops onto the couch next you, pushing your legs off to make room. 

“I’m a nerd because I’m reading a book? Am I am tomboy because I’m not wearing a dress, too, or are we keeping it to one stupid superficial stereotype?” 

Miguel chuckles as he sits on Alex’s other side. “Cut him some slack, Y/N, he took a soccer ball to the head today. Might be making him even more of an idiot than usual.” 

You can’t help but worry; you love the idiot after all. 

“You okay? Was it bad?” you’re asking as you run your hand over his head looking for bumps. “I’m fine, mom,” he mocks, pushing you away. “And you? You asshole,” he accuses Miguel playfully. “‘Took a ball to the head’?” he repeats, then turning to you adds, “It was him that kicked it!” Miguel starts laughing.

“It was the perfect setup, man. Not my fault you were distracted.” “Whatever,” Alex says as he reaches for the video game remotes. Knowing them, it was time for FIFA.

You’re eager to hide with how you look right now anyway, so you get up to head into your room. “We didn’t mean to kick you out,” Miguel starts kindly. “ You don’t have to go; you were clearly comfortable here.” “Clearly comfortable”? God that sounded bad in your head. He was “super hot”; you were “clearly comfortable.”

“Thanks, Miguel. It’s fine. I was going to —“ but you don’t finish your excuse as you trip on the remote’s charging wire as you step across, falling unceremoniously to your face right in front of them. 

“Mierda!” Miguel yells.

Alex immediately asks, “You okay?,” but it’s Miguel who’s up and over you in the same instant.

“You alright?” he asks softly as his hands grab your hips to help you up. 

His hands on you were the last thing you needed right now. So much for composure. “Fine. Really,” you say, your breath shaky. You’re kneeling on your living room floor; Miguel’s squatting in front of you, close; his hands haven’t left your body even though you’re no longer prone. He just watches you closely, eyes beautiful and concerned. You stare back into them, and after a couple more shaky breaths finally manage to stand up and step away, looking anywhere but at him. “‘M fine,” you repeat. You turn away hurriedly and go the few steps to your room. Once safely behind closed doors, your face scrunches and your stomach sinks at the sheer embarrassment. 

~

It’s been days since Miguel was at your apartment, and part of you is happy for the lack of pressure but another part of you still gets a funky feeling in her gut at the idea that the last memory of you he had was of a clumsy mess. He and Alex have a game today, and pretending to convince yourself that you just felt like it today, you make yourself up more than usual for it. You’re actually pretty happy with your look as you head out to meet some friends at the match. 

They win. Miguel scores. Twice. Alex’s defense is probably the main reason for their clean sheet. 

So, hyped up on adrenaline and victory, they’re laughing and messing around with their teammates as a bunch of people approach the sidelines to congratulate them. Alex spots you and makes a goofy face, always so playful when he’s happy. He jogs over to you and gives you a huge hug.

“Stop, you’re so sweaty!” you squeal. He just holds you tighter and rubs his sweaty hair on you, laughing. When he finally pulls away, Miguel is standing right next to him, smiling at the two of you. “Do I get a hug too?” he teases. “I scored two more goals than he did!” 

You’re not sure if he’s kidding, and you’re sure the chuckle you give in response is somewhat tense.

But, stepping toward him, you just say, “Congratulations,” and wrap your arms around his shoulders without getting too close. Damn, they were like boulders. Miguel wraps his arms around your waist and closes the distance you’d maintained, giving you a surprisingly intimate embrace. You’re struck by the feeling of him around you. He’s sweaty, too, and you can smell his musk, but instead of off-putting, you find it incredibly arousing. You can feel the rise and fall of his breathing where your chest is flush with his. He’s so warm, and you just want to breathe him in and trace every ridge of his body. But the hug is already lingering too long to be normal, and you pull back a bit awkwardly. Miguel is still looking at you, a subtle smile on his face. 

He seems about to say something when a high pitched squeal right next to you startles you. 

“Miguel!” a very pretty girl yells at him as she approaches, unabashedly jumping onto his back. She’s in a cheer uniform. “Oh my god, you were so good!” Miguel’s so sturdy, her jumping on him didn’t throw him off physically, but his face looks a little flustered. “Uh, thanks,” he says politely, putting her down. She just giggles and grabs his arm as she compliments him again. 

You feel so awkward watching this, so you just turn around and walk away. You don’t see Miguel looking after you.

~

You’re at the after party with a couple of your friends. The soccer team was quite popular, and the victory parties tended to be good. You’re mostly having fun, but you can’t help but keep looking over to where Miguel is. Man of the match and man with that face, he was obviously the center of attention. People were coming up to congratulate him left and right. He handled it all so graciously. It shocked you how there was no arrogance in his demeanor; he was just the easygoing life of the party. 

You wanted to go talk to him too, but you’d already congratulated him and didn’t know what else you would say. The last thing you wanted was to embarrass yourself again. You could go talk to your brother, who was right next to him, but he was busy flirting, and you didn’t want to ruin it for him. 

A bunch of people are dancing in the open space between you and Miguel, and the chaos lets you sneak long looks at him without his noticing. But when your friend leans over and asks, “Who do you keep looking at?,” you realize you have to be less obvious. “No one, just curious who Alex is flirting with,” you lie, proud of how quick you were with it. 

“You a jealous, protective sister type?” she laughs. 

“No, just curious.” “Is he?” “What?” “Protective?”

“Um, sometimes, depends. Why?”

“Because that guy over there keeps checking you out.” She nods toward an okay-looking guy chatting with someone on the edge of the dance floor. A second later, he was indeed looking over at you. “You should go talk to him!” “Oh, I don’t know. I’m not so interested.” “Why not? He’s hot! I’m pretty sure he’s on the team too. You don’t have to marry him, Y/N, just go dance! You’ve been weirdly tense all night.”

You look over again, and your eyes meet. Before you can do anything else, he makes the decision for you, walking over to you.

“Hey.” “Um, hi.” You exchange names and pleasantries, and he asks you if you want to dance. Without thinking about it, you glance toward the person you really wish you were dancing with. To your surprise, Miguel is already looking toward you. He looks less happy than before. You look back at this guy quickly, hoping neither of them noticed. 

You feel slightly bad thinking this, using this guy you weren’t super interested in, but you couldn’t help but feel it’d be nice if Miguel saw a side of you that might make him think of you differently, not just as Alex’s sister. It’s just a dance anyway, so, you accept the offer and head to the dance floor. 

You fall into a rhythm with the music, with the guy. The dancing is fun; the guy is fine. Your back is to Miguel, and you can’t resist spinning to catch another glimpse, doing it seamlessly as you keep dancing. Your breath catches when your eyes meet his. 

Miguel watching you from across the room is doing much more to turn you on than anything your current dance partner is doing, but you channel your new energy into your movements. It’s not a well thought out decision, though in the back of your mind you know who it’s for, but you start moving a bit more suggestively. You let your hips follow the music, let your hands come up to your hair as your body rolls rhythmically. Feeling especially bold, you even manage to meander closer to where Miguel is, giving him a better view. 

Unbeknownst to you, this unfortunately also makes Alex, now unoccupied, notice you for the first time. You don’t hear him leaning over to Miguel and saying, “Gross. I hate seeing my sister with random guys. Let’s go get more drinks.” He drags him away, and Miguel, unable to come up with a good reason not to follow, does. 

The next time you spin, all you catch is the backs of their heads.

~

The following week, you’re coming home from classes, and all you can think about is eating. You’d had to skip lunch to finish an assignment and couldn’t wait for dinner. 

When you enter your apartment, you find Miguel sitting on your couch. 

“Hey,” he greets. “Hi.” He’s sitting on the edge of the sofa closest to you, and he adorably shifts over to make room, as if you couldn’t just go around. You weren’t planning on sitting anyway, but now that he’s wordlessly extended an invitation, you do. “Where’s Alex?”

“Went to take a shower. We’re gonna play a couple games when he’s done.” He gestures toward the video game console. “Are the remotes charged?” you joke. “I hear it’s a hazard to have the wires across the living room floor.” Miguel chuckles lightly at your self-deprecating humor. He’s turned toward you, sitting in the middle of the couch, his elbow on the backrest as he occasionally messes with his luscious hair. “I felt so bad that day. Taking over your space and tripping you. When you looked so peaceful when we got here.”

“Don’t feel bad,” you laugh, amused but also masking your stirring feelings at the fact that he had thought about it at all. “I was just a mess that day. And I wouldn’t call my pyjamas peaceful, just comfortable. In my defense, though, I wasn’t expecting company.”

“I liked your pyjamas,” he teases, and you roll your eyes. “What? I did! I’m all for comfy clothing; have you not noticed 90% of my wardrobe is gym clothes?”

“Yes, well, you can get away with it. You’re a guy, and you look like that,” you say, gesturing at his body before you really realize what you’re saying. You tense as soon as you do. It just slipped out, the conversation getting weirdly easy and comfortable with him. “Like what?” he asks, but he’s smirking, knowing what you meant. You just roll your eyes again. “No, c’mon, chula, like what?” He lifts his eyebrows in challenge, mirth in his eyes. You’re too busy reeling from the pet name to have mental energy to come up with a retort. You’re grateful for what would’ve otherwise been embarrassing: your stomach grumbling. Miguel looks at your stomach and giggles. “Hungry?”

“Starving,” you say, taking the escape route and walking to the adjoining kitchen. He follows. “You can get away with it too, you know,” he says nonchalantly. You think you know what he means but look back at him questioningly. “The clothes. You always look good.” 

You’re glad you’re not facing him, your expression probably revealing your excitement. “Thanks.” “You’re welcome.” He leans on your counter. “So what are you having?” “I don’t know, whatever we have. Haven’t had time to go to the store.” You’re rummaging through your cabinets. “I can make you something,” he offers. You stop and look at him. “What? I’m a great cook,” he shrugs defensively. “Have you never had my tamales?”

“It’s not about you being good or not,” you giggle. “There’s no reason you should have to cook when you’re just here to hang out.” 

He just shrugs again, but there’s a tinge of shyness in his typically confident facade. 

You turn to open your fridge, and he comes up right next to you. “Oh shit, you guys have jarritos. Can I steal one?”

“Yeah, of course,” you laugh. “Grab whatever you want.”

You didn’t think he would immediately… As you bend over to grab something from the drawers, Miguel reaches up to grab the soda, leaning forward. Both of you moving simultaneously, your ass presses firmly against his crotch. You both freeze in panic, prolonging the position, before you jump up at the accidental contact. His and your “sorry”’s and “I didn’t mean to”’s get jumbled together in the colossally awkward moment. Miguel looks down, then back up again looking startled. He scurries around to the other side of the counter, it now separating you. “Jesus, Miguel, I didn’t do it on purpose! You don’t have to put a barricade between us; it’s not like I’m gonna jump you!” “No, no, it’s not that! Fuck, it’s, uh, fuck…” He looks lost for words. His hand comes to his face, covering it in resigned embarrassment. His voice is a mumble through his obstructing hand, “I’ve a bd’ve uh sitch-ation.”

“What?” He uncovers his face with an exasperated sigh. “I have… a bit of a… situation,” he whispers, looking down.

“Oh… oh!” you say, realization hitting you. Probably largely because of the awkward tension, at least partially at the idea of you giving Miguel O’Hara a boner, you start cracking up. He just stares at you, deadpan, his hands coming to his hips. “It’s not funny.” “It’s a little funny.” His glare cracks the tiniest bit. 

“Okay, maybe it’s a little funny. But it’s your fault!”

“I didn’t mean to!”

“Didn’t mean to what?” Alex asks nonchalantly, coming out of his room, lazily drying his hair.

“Nothing!” you and Miguel say simultaneously.

“Okay… should I just pretend that wasn’t really suspicious?” 

“Yes,” you tell him. “It’s nothing, really. Just me being clumsy again.”

His eyes are still skeptical, but Alex just chuckles and nods, letting it go at the look on your face. He heads to the couch with an easy “C’mon, man” at Miguel. Miguel follows, giving you a sideways glance and tense smile. When he sits, he immediately puts a cushion on his lap. You grab the first thing that looks edible in your fridge and head to your room. 

~

Two weekends later finds you at another soccer team party. They’d lost this time, 2-1. Miguel scored their sole goal, and the other team’s second had been a sketchy penalty. If the victory parties were good, the defeat ones were wild. Most of the players, Miguel and Alex among them, were drowning their sorrows, especially after such a disheartening defeat.

You weren’t a player, but you had your own sorrows to drown, and you weren’t stopping yourself from doing just that. You’d hardly seen Miguel in almost two weeks, and the few times you had, he’d been cold, keeping interactions mainly to greetings and goodbyes. You didn’t know if you’d done something wrong, if he was still caught up with your little awkward encounter, or if you were just making it up, your feelings for him needing some outlet. Making up stories by constantly obsessing about him was as good as outlet as you could get sometimes. Alcohol was a better one now. 

A while into the party, you’re at the bar for your… you lost count… numberth tequila shot. You down it, lick the salt off your hand, and stick the lime in your mouth, cringing. 

Your eyes are still closed when you feel a hand on your shoulder. You open them and see Miguel standing beside you. “Maybe switch to water, huh, guapa?” he tells you.

“Why? M’fine,” you slur. 

“Maybe, but you won’t be if you keep this pace up.” “And how would you know?” 

“Just noticed,” he shrugs. 

You squint your eyes accusingly at him. You didn’t know what you’d feel next time you talked to him, but you hadn’t expected to feel this angry. 

“You notice me enough to watch how much I drink but not to say more than two words at a time to me for weeks?” He looks surprised. “Y/N…” 

You cross your arms and lift your eyebrows in an implied “what?”

When he doesn’t say anything, you just walk past him. You end up walking through the dance floor, and though it wasn’t your plan, you kind of like moving to the music. You’re drunk enough to the lack the inhibitions to just dance alone. You’re enjoying yourself, not even bothering to look back and see if Miguel was still there. A bit later though, you startle as you feel a hand on your ass. You turn and find a random guy you’ve never met before, smiling at you disgustingly drunkenly. You’re taken aback, your mind already a bit slow from the alcohol, so you haven’t decided yet how to tell him to fuck off by the time Miguel is in front of you shoving him away. He’s not overly aggressive but, even drunk, easily moves the guy away from you with an angry “What the hell, man?” 

The other guy looks seriously scared and just lifts his hands with a pathetic “sorry, Miguel.” 

“Fucking better be, what the hell is wrong with you?” The other guy stumbles away. Miguel turns towards you, and his expression melts from frightening anger to warm concern in two seconds. “You okay?” he asks, his hands carefully grazing your shoulders. You nod and lean into him. At your seeming comfortable, he lets his arms come around you. 

“Thanks,” you whisper in his ear.

“Of course,” he whispers in yours, and it sends a shiver down your entire body. You stare into his eyes, your hands resting on his chest. 

“Miguel?” 

“Yeah?”

“Wanna dance with me?” 

They don’t call it “liquid courage” for nothing. 

Miguel considers you for a moment, but a soft smirk is whispered across is sharp features. He nods slowly, and his hands move slightly further down your back. You close your eyes at the sensation of his hands running along your body. You run your hands up his chest slowly and wrap your arms around his neck. When you open your eyes, you see his crimson ones boring into you. 

You start moving a bit more as you focus on the music to relieve some of the tension you’re feeling. He follows your lead, and soon you’re dancing together much more easily. As a couple of songs go by, you’re both moving freely, staying close to each other the whole time.

You’re so exhilarated, and he seems as enveloped in you as you are in him, so the next time the beat calls for it, you let your body twist rhythmically in his grasp. Your back is now flush with his chest, your ass on his crotch, your hand reaching behind you on his neck, in his hair. His hands are firm on your hips, and when you roll them against him, you hear his whispered “Fuck, mami” in your ear and feel his arm come around your middle, pulling you into him. His hips move in rhythm with yours. You’ve probably never been so turned on in your entire life. You keep this up for a delicious while. You can feel Miguel is hard through his jeans, but he makes no sign of being embarrassed, just continuing to dance with you with expert hip movements that make your imagination go wild. Of course he’d be an amazing dancer. Of course you’d imagine what else his hips could do. 

You twist back in his embrace, coming to face him. He holds you close, and you bring a hand to his face. He leans into your touch. You move your face up slightly, and he seems to be following, moving his down. You’re so close, even think you feel your lips graze his, when someone bumps up against you, making you stumble. 

Miguel’s strong arms catch you, but the moment is gone, and a second later, he looks startled.

“You okay?” he asks, stepping back a bit, speaking loudly to keep his distance. “Yeah, I’m fine,” you assure, but he seems off. 

“Let’s get some air, huh?” 

You follow him outside, the sudden change in ambience making your head spin a little. You lean against the wall, and he puts his hand on your shoulder. 

“Sure you’re okay?” You nod but don’t say anything, maybe a bit drunker than you thought, trying to ground yourself. He leans on the wall next to you. His body is warm where it grazes your side. You can feel his gaze intermittently on you. You get a little dizzy again, and you lean onto his shoulder. He just lets you, and you stand like that for a while. 

His fingers graze the back of your hand.

“Want me to take you home?”

You nod into his body. He wraps a firm arm around your shoulders and leads you away from the party. 

You’re home before you know it, the whole journey a blur dominated by his warmth by your side. When you reach your front door, you lean on it and look up at him. His subtle smile elicits your full one. “Thanks,” you whisper. “’S no problem,” he shrugs. “You’ll be okay?” “Yeah,” you nod. You’re already sobering up. “You?”

He chuckles and nods. 

“I wasn’t the one downing tequila shots like water,” he teases. Your cheeks warm, and you look down as you chuckle. 

“Wasn’t that many…” 

He laughs.

“It was, cariño.” Again with the pet names. 

“I’m still surprised you noticed.” “I always notice you,” he responds without missing a beat. Your eyes snap up to his, and you see the longing there. 

You stare at each other for a heavy moment, then, drunk more on the sensations of your earlier almost-kiss than on alcohol, chasing that feeling, you lean up to try again. Your lips are a breath away from his when he looks down, effectively rejecting your advance. You pull away, mortified. 

“Sorry, I… sorry,” you stutter as you scramble for your keys. You turn to your door. “Y/N,” he whispers, his hand holding your wrist softly. “It’s okay,” you say, looking back him, wiping tears from your eyes. “You don’t have to say anything; sorry I misunderstood.” 

You quickly go inside and close the door. You lean on it, crying. Miguel, eyes closed, fists clenched, rests his forehead on the opposite side. 

~

Miguel doesn’t come around for a while. Even as days pass, you can’t stop thinking about your night together. Confusion, sadness, embarrassment — all mixing together into a terrible cocktail.

Another match day rolls around, and you can’t stomach the idea of watching Miguel play, of potentially having to talk to him after. You tell Alex you’re really sorry to not support him this time, but that you’re not feeling well. He worries over you a while, unhelpfully but adorably emptying your medicine cabinet onto the kitchen counter, looking through stuff, suggesting this and that, telling you to text him anything you needed that he could bring you after. 

A while later, you’ve just slumped down onto the couch, when your stomach sinks at the sight you’re met with. There, at the corner of the room, lie his cleats. He’d been cleaning them the night before and had clearly forgotten to put them back in his gym bag. 

“Fuck.” 

You lift yourself up, grab them, and head over to the stadium. 

When you get there, you pound at the locker room door, and it opens — of course, you couldn’t catch a fucking break — to Miguel O’Hara’s gorgeous face. Though he looks at you intently, you can’t quite read his expression. Then he yells over his shoulder, “Ale!” 

Alex jogs over and, upon seeing you, lets out the biggest sigh of relief. 

“Oh, thank God. I fucking love you.” He reaches for the cleats you’re holding up to him and gives you a  bear hug. “Saved my fucking life, Y/N/N. Thank you.” He kisses your forehead. “You don’t look as sick. You’ll be okay?” He’s clearly in a rush to get back but wants to make sure you’re alright. 

You nod and playfully shove his chest, pushing him back into the locker room. “You’re the best!” he yells over his shoulder as he saunters back. Miguel is still just standing there, all geared up for the match. It crosses your sick mind how good the uniform looks on him. 

“You’re sick?” he asks. 

“Nothing I won’t get over.” You offer him a weak smile. He’s nodding slowly, considering. 

“Stay for the match?”

“Miguel, I —“ “Please.” You’ve never heard him plead before. You’re head is nodding before your mind can catch up. He just nods too. “I’ll find you after.” And with that, he jogs back into the locker room. 

You’d never known ninety minutes could drag on for eternity, with a half-time’s worth of eternity in between. You’re sure you’re heartbeat was elevated the entire time, your mind and emotions reeling. What was Miguel going to say to you after the match? You had absolutely no read on him during your short interaction before. Then again, apparently you weren’t always great at reading him. 

Minute after minute trickles by. At the end of the second half, your team up a goal (yes, Miguel’s), the ref announces an unusually large number of minutes. You moan with everyone else, for your own reasons. What was a potential leveler compared to the leveling of your heart?

Slowly, the minutes pass. The other team builds a mounting attack; they get a good attempt; they miss. The whistle blows; the crowd cheers, and you, you’re frozen in place. 

You thaw yourself slowly as the players shake hands, go to their respective huddles. By the time they’re roaming the sidelines freely, you’ve only just managed to leave your seat. 

As you descend the bleachers stairs, you catch sight of Miguel. He’s obviously searching, halfheartedly ignoring the congratulations coming from all sides. His eyes eventually meet yours, and as soon as they do, he’s running over to you, meeting you much closer to the bleachers than the field. 

He comes to a stop right in front of you and just watches you. You just watch him. “Congratulations,” you say. He chuckles, lightly shaking his head.

“Thanks.” 

He takes a step closer to you. “Y/N…” “Yeah?” “I…” “Miguel!” you’re interrupted. “Congratulations! Way to pull it out!” “Thanks, yeah, thank you,” he says hurriedly, looking back over to you. “Listen, I just, I wanted to clear things up after how we left them.” You nod, worrying your bottom lip, your arms wrapping around you defensively.

“I didn’t want you to think that —“

“Congratulations, Miguel! Did it again, man!” And a slap on the back.

“Uh-huh, yeah, thank you,” Miguel responds, turning away, approaching rudeness. “For fuck’s sake,” he says, much more softly. “C’mere.” He grabs your arm and drags you around the bleachers, stopping when you have a semblance of cover. He’s looking around to make sure no one else is about to talk to him, and his worried looks right after he’s just won makes you laugh. The sound draws his attention fully back to you. He smiles at seeing you smiling. 

“Where can a guy get a little privacy, huh?” he jokes. “Probably not still by the field where he just scored the winning goal, I’m guessing,” you tease. He chuckles. Then he takes a deep, sobering breath. “Listen, Y/N…” 

His tone sounds apologetic, and it makes you immediately think the worst. He probably just didn’t want you to be embarrassed. Wanted to fix things so they wouldn’t be awkward if he hung around, which he’d obviously want to do given Alex was his best friend. 

Already fighting back tears, wanting to beat him to the punch to save face in whatever way you could at this point, you cut him off. “Miguel, you don’t have to explain anything or anything. I’m sorry I made more out of a good time than I should have. Please don’t let me keep you from hanging out with my brother even if I’m around, and I hope we can still be friends.” “What? No, that’s not… This isn’t about Alex. I mean, well it is a little bit.” He’s looking unsure. “Just keep things how they were before. It’s all fine.” “Is that what you want?” He looks serious. “What do you mean?” “Is that what you want? To keep things how they were before? To still be friends?”

“I… well… it’s what you want, isn’t it?” “I never said that.” “You didn’t have to. I tried to kiss you, and you pretty much said no to that. Twice.”

“I didn’t. Well, once, yeah I did, but it was only because I was worried you were too drunk. I didn’t want to take advantage of you. And, also, maybe a little bit because I panicked, okay?” He sounds more vulnerable than you’ve ever heard him yet. “I was worried it’d be weird with Alex or that I’d fuck it up with you, and I just, I don’t know, I panicked. And the other time wasn’t my fault. I was going to kiss you if you hadn’t stumbled.” “Someone bumped into me!” “I’m not blaming you! I just, it just, it made me remember you were drunk, and I didn’t want to be like that idiot guy I’d had to push away a while earlier.” “You’re nothing like that guy,” you say sternly. “I…” He’s started to look frustrated, unable to find the words. He runs his hand over his face, takes another deep breath. “What if you try now?” “What?” “I don’t know how to tell you. So maybe I can just show you. Try again, and no one will bump into you. I won’t panic, and I won’t think of all the things that could go wrong. I’ll think of how I’ve been feeling since that night. Absolutely fucking miserable. It’s been eating away at me; all I could think about was making it right with you, but I didn’t know how, didn’t know if I should. But I can’t take it anymore, and if you feel the same way, then, fuck, let’s just stop getting in our own way.” 

“Miguel…” “Yeah?” “That was pretty good for not knowing how to tell me.” Your face forms the slightest teasing smirk, your eyes lighting up at the realization of what he’s telling you. “Shut up and kiss me already,” he says, rolling his eyes, unable to help his bright smile, pulling your body to his and bringing his lips onto yours. 

You pull him into you, reciprocating eagerly. He moans into your mouth, and you feel his towering body sink onto yours. His arms are tight around you, one hand cupping your head, bringing you close. His kiss is fervent, desperate but concentrated. 

You run your hands in his hair, and he chuckles gruffly, the sound muffled by your chasing mouth. You lose yourself in his embrace. You grip him tightly, breaching into his mouth, wanting to kiss him as much as wanting to be kissed by him. You could feel the beginning of a beautiful push and pull as your mouths move together, your bodies mold into each other’s. 

You want to kiss him forever, but some loud cheering nearby startles you slightly apart. Miguel is looking deeply into your eyes. He kisses you again, lets his forehead rest on yours when he pulls back. You’re smiling when you say, “You should probably get back. I’m sure people are looking for you.” He groans dramatically and hides in the crook of your neck. He kisses it before saying, “I just want to be with you.” 

You giggle, nuzzling his face with yours, holding him close, your hand in his hair.

“Yeah, me too.” He hums into your neck. He plants another kiss there, and one on your cheek on his way up, as he lifts his head again. His rough hands caress your face tenderly. 

“This is good,” he says simply. You laugh and nod. “Fuck ‘em. I’ll go over there at some point. Let’s just stay here a little while longer.”

“Okay,” you smile. 

Miguel leans back into you, kissing you and kissing you and kissing you. 

[chiroptophobiawrites]

Batboys Type Headcanons

(this is literally just a ramble)

Dick Grayson:

Tall women

People who prove they can handle themselves

Pretty people

Cheekbones probably

Kind of muscular body

Doesn’t care much about specific features but rather what it all looks like added up

Independent people

Is a clinger at first glance but actually values distance

Has probably the biggest variety type wise in that he dates very different people

Kind of nurturing people but often in a tough love kind of way

Thigh guy? unsure about him

likes a district sense of style in his partners, usually something that either keeps up with trends or is distinctly them

Jason Todd:

Butt guy, not unsure about that one (and also tummy)

Likes chubby women but also really muscular women

His preference is one of the two but he will go outside of his type

Like he has a type but he doesn’t stick to it

Cause he doesn’t actually seek out partners they just come to him

Also taller women

But then at the same time he is probably the one most likely to like a big height difference as well

so take that as you will

Likes either fighters or nerds

or both

pretty similar to Dick actually

Doesn’t care much about style in his partner, wears athletic clothes 24/7 and would take someone who does the same

Tim Drake

A mess

The one brother who (openly lol) is into guys as well

Likes people who can have a little banter with

Someone who can read him for filth i’m ngl

People around his height or a few inches in either direction

High energy people who can even be all over the place

likes people who are lowkey a stylistic mess, like they will have some cute outfits but it’s very hit or miss (usually miss)

Body type wise is not very picky but tends to attract scrawny little nerds like himself (/j)

boobs guy 10000% does not matter how much

Duke Thomas:

my lil pookie

Hips guy

Likes prominent noses

or actually prominent features in general

Is drawn to someone a bit more no none sense and serious so that he can see how long it takes for them to admit they like him

likes dark hair and especially when it’s long

Likes a sort of ‘tomboy’ clothing style

He is a true romantic and craves love at first sight

but also probably has the least hangups if his partner does not want to be married in the next 2-5 business days

Someone around his height but slightly shorter, but body type wise nothing specific

Damian Wayne (older)

unconventional but also still conventionally attractive???

Like he likes pretty people cause he likes pretty things in general

But they don’t have to fit into the conventional beauty standards, just someone who most people would be like oh wow they are pretty

people who dress alternately in some way shape or form

Legs guy def

needs frenemies to lovers, will die without it

Like he wants a best friend who he can play fight with and also tell everything and also kiss sometimes

likes body mods (piercings, tattoos, contacts, dyed hair, etc.)

either short hair or really long hair no in between

someone his height or a few inches in either direction

[grusinskayas]

Greta Garbo, born Greta Gustafsson 119 years ago on September 18th ❤️

When Greta was born, [her father] Karl’s employer offered to adopt her to ease their poverty. Anna [her mother] refused. If God sent us a child, she said, he will provide bread. […]

What can be concluded about Garbo’s childhood? Was it a joyful time, as she played sports, produced plays, and led the neighborhood gang in mischief? Was it gloomy, filled with violence? Cecil Beaton asked her those questions and recorded her answers: “She talked about her youth and how unhappy she was. I interjected: But you’ve always told me you were such a tomboy and had so much fun leading the other children into mischief. She replied: ‘Cecil Beaton, how can you say such things! There are 365 days in the year!’” Garbo’s reply to Beaton’s question sounds like Garbo at her humorous best, using irony to avoid a direct answer. She probably found her childhood both happy and harrowing; both these reactions colored her later life. But its traumas never left her. She couldn’t stand quarreling, and she trained herself to remain calm when disagreements arose. There was also her terrible fear of strangers, not only in crowds but also in intimate settings. As she aged, books with violence in them frightened her. She always felt as though she was running away from someone or something. These aspects of her character sound like holdovers from a violent experience as a child. Yet, she could be playful and jokey, childlike and joyful. And she could take problems in stride. When a group of fans mobbed her after the opening of Camille in 1936, she wrote to her mentor and close friend Salka Viertel, “I guess I can’t complain. After all, I’m just a circus lady.” She included in the letter a picture she had drawn of herself as a tightrope walker, with a parasol in one hand.

Ideal Beauty: the Life and Times of Greta Garbo by Lois W. Banner

[empress-simps]

May I please request a fic with James and a tomboy!reader? She’s into sports (namely quidditch, ofc), doesn’t mind getting dirty. Typical tomboy-ish stuff lmao!!! I’m not sure how to describe it. Whatever house you think is fitting will be fine by me :)

Thanks for the request darling! I hope this is what you had in mind! I’m not quite confident on how I wrote the reader but I hope it’s alright, this is my understanding of your request🥹 Thank you!(I was listening to “Everybody Talks” by Neon Trees when writing this!)

Bruises and Broomsticks

Pairing: James Potter x Reader

CW: Implied Fem!Reader (uses she/her pronouns), Reader getting injured, Jealous James, and Language. (2.4k words)

James doesn’t know how it happened or when it happened.

He viewed you as a great friend- even going as far as calling you an honorary marauder. James had always seen you as one of the guys, someone who could take a joke and throw a punch. Your laughter was infectious, your loyalty unwavering, and your spirit indomitable. You were the one who would challenge him to a race on brooms, who would formulate the best strategies for capturing the snitch, and who never backed down from a dare as ridiculous as spray painting a random wall in Hogwarts.

Although, there were moments that caught him off guard—like the way the sun caught in your hair during a late afternoon practice, or how your eyes sparkled with mischief before helping them plan a prank. It was in those quiet, unguarded moments that James found himself drawn to you.

James thought it probably was the way you care and defend everyone close to you with everything you got, or how you don’t care what people thought of you. You were confident to be yourself. Whatever it was, he realized his feelings for you ran deeper than he had ever anticipated.

“Marls!” You called, running to her (almost tripping) as you entered the Gryffindor common room, sporting an ever-growing bruise on your cheek. Marlene smiled, but quickly frowned as she spotted the purple-green blob on your cheek. “Godric! What happened to your face, Y/n?!”

James quickly perked u as he heard your name, pulling him out of the conversation he’s having with Remus. He watches as you shrugged, “Dolohov was messing with me again earlier.” Sirius grinned, emerging from the portrait a second behind you. “She was a menace, I tell you!” The tall boy barks out a laugh, backing you up as a toothy grin appeared on your face.

Poor James, one of these days he’s bound to have a heart attack if he hears another news of you getting into a fight.

James watched one of his best mates throw an arm around your shoulders, hyping you up. His jaw clenched, trying to mask the growing pit of jealousy in his otherwise calm demeanor. He couldn’t help the flare of jealousy that sparked within him each time Sirius got too close, each time his laughter mingled with yours in a way that made James’s heart race for all the wrong reasons. He knew Sirius meant no harm, that your friendship with the marauder was just that—friendship. But as James’s eyes followed the casual way Sirius’s hand rested on your shoulder, he felt a possessive urge to sweep you away from everyone. He thinks he should be the one who’s on your side.

Remus tried his best not to laugh; he leans to Peter beside him, whispering “Looks like Prong’s about to burst a blood vessel,” his voice low, laced with amusement and humor as Peter looked up from his essay.

James shot Remus a warning glance, but it was softened by the half-smile that betrayed his true feelings. “Shut it, Moony,” he said, though his eyes never left you.

“What happened?” Peter asked, most students lounging in the common room looked at you, awaiting your reply.

You placed your hands in the pockets of your worn-out wide legged jeans. “I beat the shit out of that fucker.” You shrugged, a triumphant smirk on your features.

As the common room erupted with laughter at your bold proclamation, James couldn’t help but feel his heart swell with pride. There you were, fearless and fierce, and utterly oblivious to the way he hung on to your every word, to the way his world seemed to orbit around you.

And perhaps, he thought, that was exactly as it should be. For now.

Remus looks at him with a mirth present on his face. “You know, Prongs, one of these days you’ll have to accept that Y/n can handle herself,” he said, nudging James with a knowing smile. James, however, couldn’t shake off the concern he felt. “It’s not about her handling herself, Moony,” he muttered, his gaze still fixed on you. “It’s about her getting hurt.”

Oblivious to James’s inner turmoil, you continued your tale. “So, I was minding my business when Dolohov suddenly appeared and was uttering how a muggle born like me shouldn’t be walking around and tainting the wizarding world.” You started, “His wand was pointed right at me, probably about to hex me. You know what I did?” You paused for dramatic effect; your eyes twinkling. The common room was silent, everyone hanging on your every word. “I grabbed the nearest ink pot and chucked it right at his nose. Got him square in the face!” You laughed, the sound rich and carefree. Sirius joined in, slapping his knee in amusement. “It looked like a squid inked him in the face!” he adds, “This sod charmed the ink, so it’ll stay for a week!” Sirius pointed at you.

"Sirius and I were laughing so hard, he managed to hit me in the face—can you believe he forgot to even use magic? I got him back; pretty sure my converse left a mark on the side of his face.” You couldn't help but grin, recounting the tale. Marlene shook her head, her earlier concern now replaced with admiration. "That's my Y/n right there!" she said proudly, "Never one to back down from a fight."

As the laughter died down, you caught James’s eye. He was trying to look stern, but the corners of his mouth betrayed him, curving into a reluctant smile. “Just be careful, okay?” he said softly, a rare display of tenderness from him.

You nodded, your smirk softening into a genuine smile. “Always am, Potter.”

And with that, you turned on your heel, your maroon converse thudding against the wooden floor as you made your way to the dorms, leaving a trail of whispers and a certain besotted Marauder in your wake.

“Merlin, Prongs. You never told us to be careful, just to bugger off.” Peter complained, Eliciting a grin from Sirius. “Luck’s not on our side, wormy. James doesn’t fancy us.” James gave Sirius a look.

“Don’t even deny it, Prongsie. You thought I couldn’t see you practically hexing me when I was beside her?” Sirius snorts, sitting beside Remus and leaning onto the boy’s shoulder who wrapped an arm around him.

James couldn’t find it in himself to disagree, nor did he want to. It was the truth, and it was out there now. James realized that this was a turning point, not just in his relationship with you, but in his own life. He was in love, truly and deeply, and it was time to embrace that reality.

Stepping out into the field in your quidditch uniform, you can hear the screams and chants echoing in your ears, the noise never fails you to get riled up. The vibrant green of the grass seemed to pulse with the energy of the crowd, the sky was a clear blue, a perfect backdrop for the game ahead. Feeling the familiar rush of adrenaline pumping through your veins, you gripped your broom tighter, an excited smile appearing on your face. You adjusted your goggles, the leather strap snug against your hair, and swung a leg over your broom.

James took in the sight of you, smiling softly. “Be safe, yeah?”

Shooting him a wink, you replied. “Aye aye, captain.”

The referee's whistle pierced the air, and with a powerful kick, you were airborne. The wind whipped past you, tangling your hair as you soared higher. Below, the field became a patchwork of colors, the players mere specks in a sea of movement. You were in your element, the broom an extension of your body as you weaved through the air seamlessly, air resistance got nothing on you.

The Quidditch match was in full swing, the stands filled with cheers and the sky a blur of players on brooms. You were a force to be reckoned with, dodging Bludgers and racing after the Quaffle with unmatched skill. But in a split second, everything changed. A rogue Bludger, charmed by Dolohov's dark magic, veered off course and struck you with a sickening crack that seemed to echo throughout the pitch.

The game halted as screams and shocked whispers echoed through the pitch. James, who saw the entire thing happen in front of him, stopped dead in his tracks. His heart plummeted and felt his body go cold as he watched you fall, your body limp and vulnerable. Without a second thought, he dove, catching you just before you hit the ground.

“What in Merlin’s name is going on?! Gryffindor’s quidditch star L/n has just been knocked off her broom!” The announcer sputters, also shocked at the event.

In the aftermath of the rogue Bludger's strike, James's instincts took over. With Y/n cradled in his arms, he flew to the ground, the rest of the world a blur. The screams from the stands faded into the background as he focused solely on you. Nothing else mattered, you were his priority. Damn that stupid match, he needs to make sure you’re okay.

"Y/n, can you hear me?" James's voice was steady, but his eyes were wide with pure unadulterated fear. He gently laid you on the grass, brushing away a strand of hair from your face.

Sirius landed next to James, “Prongs, what happened? How’s Y/n?” His voice was laced with worry, checking you for any possible injuries. Your other teammates shot each other worried glances; the match has been called off.

Madam Pomfrey rushed onto the field, her medical bag in hand. “Make way, students!” She yells, but James was hesitant to move away. "She’s going to be okay," the matron assured him, James looked in Madame Pomfrey’s eyes, trying but failing to know if she meant what she said. Other players and the audiences have been ushered out of the field.

James nodded, but he couldn't tear his gaze away from Y/n's still face. "I've got you," he whispered, more to himself than to her. "I won't let anything happen to you." Sirius gently pulls him away. “C’mon Prongs, let’s leave Madam Pomfrey to do her magic, yeah?”

The fear that gripped him was real, and it brought a clarity he'd never felt before. He loves you, and he needs you to be okay because Merlin forbid- he wouldn’t know what he’ll do if you aren’t.

He stayed close to you, not letting you out of his sight. Miraculously, Y/n stirred, her eyes fluttering open. She was hurt, but she was alive- that was enough for James for now. “Alright, love. We’ll get you to the Hospital Wing, just hang on.”

Your mind was hazy, you could make out two forms of people whom you guessed was James and Sirius. You groaned, the events earlier somehow getting clearer. “Fucking… Dolohov… I’ll get him back…” You muttered, sleep and exhaustion got the best of you.

As consciousness slowly crept back, your eyelids fluttered open, revealing the blurry outlines of the hospital wing. The ceiling came into focus, and a wave of relief washed over you. Well, you were glad you can still get revenge on that Slytherin wanker.

Turning your head, your gaze fell upon James. He was slumped in a chair beside your bed, his glasses askew, and his hair more tousled than usual. It was clear he hadn't moved from that spot since you’d been brought in.

"James?" Your voice was hoarse, barely above a whisper, making you cringe.

His head snapped up, his eyes wide with a mix of hope and fear. "Y/n? Oh, Merlin, you're awake," he breathed out, a smile breaking through his exhaustion. “That I am, have you been here this entire time?’ You asked, leaning to his direction to fix his glasses, effectively making him blush.

James' pursed his lips, trying hard not to show his hands that were slightly trembling as he clasped them together, trying to gather his thoughts. The sight of you lying there, injured, and vulnerable, had shaken him to the core. "I was terrified," he began, his voice barely above a whisper. "When I saw you fall during the game, my heart just... stopped."

You felt your heart fill with warmth, he moved closer, his eyes never leaving yours. "It made me realize how fragile everything is, how quickly things can change," he continued, his voice growing stronger with each word. "And it made me realize that I couldn't waste another moment hiding the truth from you.”

He takes a deep breath, reaching for your hand. His gaze earnest and unwavering, "I fancy you, and not just in some passing way. You mean everything to me, and the thought of losing you, of not having the chance to tell you how I feel... it's unbearable."

He paused, searching your face for any sign of how you were taking his words. "I don't want to wait for another scare to be honest with you. I want to be there for you, to protect you, and to be someone you can rely on. If you'll let me."

The room was filled with a tense silence as James awaited your response, his confession hanging between you like a delicate thread, ready to weave a new beginning or unravel at the slightest touch.

“Is this your way of saying you’re in love with me, Potter?” You smiled, which prompted James to roll his eyes playfully.

“I’m being serious, darling.” His thumb softly caressed the back of your hand, "I love you too, pothead. You’re an idiot for not saying it sooner." You laughed, teasing the boy beside you but your fingers curled into his, holding on just as firmly.

“I am your idiot, darling.” he replied, a soft chuckle escaping him as he leaned forward, his forehead resting gently against yours.

Looking into his eyes, you can see the rawness of emotion he feels, you know everything he had said was genuine. It was a look that cannot be put into words. In that moment, everything that had happened on the Quidditch pitch, every fear and confession, seemed to solidify into something undeniable.

Neither of you needed to speak; your hands entwined with James speak volumes. You gave his hand a weak squeeze, a silent promise that you were there, you were with him, and you weren’t going anywhere.

[nayatarot777]

how do men vs women view you? • pac reading

• pile one •

men

cards: 6 of swords, page of wands, 6 of coins

men see you as someone who isn’t afraid to move away from conflict or anything that stresses you out for the sake of your own mental peace. you don’t jeopardise that for nobody. and you also seem to be someone who is all about learning how to experience certain things in life - leading me to think that perhaps you’re the type to date multiple people, or just not limit yourself to one particular thing or person. you’re extremely balanced in the way that you think and the way that you practically live your life though. from the outside, you could seem quite bubbly or excitable. someone who has a passion for experiencing life - i’m also seeing that men could feel like you’re very passionate about helping the less fortunate too. you seem to be someone who’s extremely charitable with your money, your time, or something else that you practically give away. i’m also seeing that some of you could dress “freely” too, so this either means that you’re happy with your body to dress revealingly, or you’re extremely creative with how you dress and just wear whatever you feel like wearing. your dress sense could even be seen as quite childlike - but it works. you also seem quite adamant on learning thoroughly how to be independent by yourself. and i’m also seeing that men may feel as though you’re someone who makes shit happen in your own life. to the point where you’re able to help others and show others how to help themselves - “leading by example”.

women

cards: 4 of swords, page of cups, page of coins

3 out of 4 of the pages in the deck have come out, so you guys could be seen as a young person (because you actually are - like a teenager), or that’s your demeanour that you show. with men, the childlike nature is seen through any excitability, confidence, or self-assurance that you might have around them. with women, they view you as someone who’s very introverted and shy for some reason. but they also see you as someone who notices and recognises everything there is to notice in your environment - to the point where it could come as a surprise regarding how much you know and notice. you might get along with men easier than you do women, because i’m seeing that women view you as someone who may struggle with social anxiety or just something that prevents you from speaking much. they see you as someone who just sticks to yourself, really. however, you seem so happy in this solitude. women view you as someone who has realised what truly makes them happy, and you seem to be very emotionally open and helpful to those who you choose to open up to. but i’m feeling a distance between you and them that most women feel. even if you’re a woman yourself, you might be a tomboy or just feel like you don’t have much in common with most women who you meet. they do see you as a very sweet energy - calming too - but they feel like you’d rather be left alone. yk what i’m hearing? it’s probably the women who are really full-on in their first impressions. you may just be reserved but i’m hearing that the way that some women speak to you, or how they approach you may be just too forward and maybe even alike to love-bombing.

i feel you, pile one. there’s nothing wrong with you, you’re just very grounded and stable by yourself. both men and women see how independent you are. men just appreciate it more, probably because they mainly observe you at first, i’m seeing. whereas women want to interact with you more perhaps, and when they don’t get the reaction that they like or want, they feel like you must either just be shy or really introverted. when you’re not in actuality. when other people grant you the space to show your personality and open up naturally, that’s when they’ll see the fun and excitable side to you.

thank you for reading, pile one. if you’d like a personal reading, check out my pinned post here for details

check out my patreon if you’d like, too

☺️🫶🏾

• pile two •

men

cards: judgement, 5 of wands, queen of cups

men view you as someone who is extremely aware of aspects of life that not many people experience for themselves. particularly creativity and knowing exactly what you want to create. it seems like you’re creating the life that you want under any circumstances, and you seem to be quite defensive when it comes to this. some men could view you as someone who’s quite combative too, and highly aware of when you need to assert your energy in order to defend yourself from another’s. you could get into a lot of ego clashes with men, and that’s because they feel as though you’re aware of way too much. you could also either have a lot of competition or a lot of men competing for you, but it seems like overall, you come across as very self-protective (especially protective over your emotional space, what you give emotionally, etc) around men. i’m seeing you fight off men who don’t live up to your standards 😂. because you know exactly what you want. you’re extremely attractive to men but there’s a resistance there - thanks to how protective you are over yourself. they also assume that you really prioritise self care and put it at the forefront of your life. you could work out a lot, take care of your appearance - whatever it is. i’m also seeing you keep yourself out of petty drama and ego conflicts due to being focused on finding the answers to something significant within your life. to men, you’re quiet and calm, but you’re also on your own particular path regarding what you want and how you’d like to express yourself. you don’t let petty, insignificant energies influence how you feel about yourself and your life path.

women

cards: 5 of cups, 10 of cups, 8 of swords

for some reason, women view you as someone who’s grieving the loss of someone/some people usually. and they also view you as quite insecure, lonely, or just someone who doesn’t want to be seen. with this 10 of cups, i’m hearing that a lot of women project onto you what they want you to feel like. they could actually project their fears and anxieties onto you. especially because there’s something significant about how sexually attractive you are to a lot of people. i feel like it makes a lot of women feel insecure within themselves. women could actually cause emotional loss in your life to put you into this 8 of swords energy. it’s like i’m seeing women view you as someone who is experiencing emotional loss in the middle of seemingly having a life that is ‘supposed’ to be emotionally fulfilling. for women who aren’t vindictive towards you, they could see you as someone who has almost anything that you could want, but you’re still not happy. or perhaps these are women who know that you’d rather just get rid of certain people around you, going back to the energy of wanting to be alone and not wanting to be seen. women could also feel like you try to hide your beauty - not due to not knowing your beauty - but because of the smoke and mirrors that people put up with you thanks to trying to get close to you because of it. women can definitely tell that you worry so much - but they might not understand why. again, i’m seeing women view you as the “dream” person but someone who for some reason is focusing on people from the past. or some type of guilt or shame. a lot of women feel like you’re doing yourself a disservice through the way that you seemingly downplay yourself.

thank you for reading, pile two. if you’d like a personal reading, check out my pinned post here for details

check out my patreon if you’d like, too

☺️🫶🏾

• pile three •

men

cards: knight of wands, strength, 7 of coins

you’re viewed by men as someone who has no fear. literally. you have a very strong and healthy ego and you seem to make hasty decisions - when you want something, you go after it. you don’t wait for anyone’s permission. you could also have very good control over your ego. i’m hearing that some men have seen you transform from someone who struggled with their impulsive actions to someone who can now control what they say and do. you don’t pop off as much 😂. you’re also very stubborn when you choose to invest your time and energy into something - you don’t give up. especially if it’s related to self development and improving yourself as a person. you’re extremely self-focused but in the best way possible. i’m hearing that you don’t give up on yourself at all. men can tell that you’re someone who wouldn’t fall victim to other people trying to tear you down very easily. at all. you’re focused on overcoming adversities that you face personally, and you’re completely interested in making something of yourself.you could be “more developed” than a lot of other people your age, in one way or another. i’m also seeing that men can see that you have no issue with setting something on fire if you no longer see the point or the value in continuing to invest in it. and once you make a decision, then that’s it. you don’t flip flop and you don’t change your mind 50 different times. you’re someone who also knows how to use whatever tools that you have available to your advantage. you take control over situations and you make shit happen in your favour - or for the sake of your own betterment.

women

cards: ace of cups, page of swords, 2 of wands

women view you as someone who knows how to direct your life according to what you think would give you emotional fulfilment. you think before you speak, and think about the decisions that you’re making extremely logically. especially when it comes to new connections that you have - either with them or with other people. women can tell that you listen to your intuition about people and you have no problem with deciding to switch up your behaviour or way of communicating if you feel like it’s necessary. i’m also hearing that they feel like you decide to spend your time extremely wisely. you could be the type of person who hates to feel like they’re wasting time. or you’re just extremely smart with who you invest energy into and how much. women can tell that you know how to make rational decisions based on what you intuitively know that you should do, whether the messages that you receive is something that you want to hear or not. you could also be someone who’s extremely curious about connecting with others though, but there seems to always be a boundary put up between you and new people (as there should be). i’m hearing that women may feel like you only associate yourself with people who are constantly taking steps to do the work on themselves and their life, meaning that you only associate yourself with people who are constantly changing or moving in some way. women seem to recognise that you don’t like being around stagnant people. regarding the women who you care about, you take into consideration their opinions and use them as guidance, and you also guide other women quite a lot too. especially when it comes to their emotional awareness and emotions in general.

thank you for reading, pile two. if you’d like a personal reading, check out my pinned post here for details

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☺️🫶🏾

[thou-babbling-brook]

Maria Thorpe Character Analysis

Well, I simply can’t disappoint the people – aka, the five of you that will read this, lmfao. I’m so serious about this that I’m actually drafting this on a Google doc before I post this rather than just typing random thoughts on my phone. This is going to be a HUGE ramble that probably won’t make a ton of sense, but I hope it’s entertaining regardless. 

Maria Thorpe – a character that Ubisoft probably spent MAYBE thirty minutes thinking about, but that I have not stopped thinking about for like, five years. What a gal. So glad I was not in this fandom in 2012 to witness how HEINOUS people were about her for simply being a woman “in the way” of a M|M relationship. I hope by the end of this ramble, you, too, will see her for the baddie she truly is. 

In this essay, I will delve into Maria’s character to explore why she is so fascinating to me, the implications of her story, and why Ubisoft can actually catch these hands for dumbing her down in AC Revelations. (I'm putting a cut here because it's so fucking long I'm sorry gang)

First off, to understand Maria Thorpe as a character, you have to understand her background. I’m not going to copy and paste her Wiki or anything, but I am going to outline her life (stated and implied) before we meet her.

For those that don’t know, Maria was born an English noblewoman in 1161 – four years before Altaïr was born (okay cougar). Because she was a tomboy and defied many of the social norms for women in the 12th century, she was ostracized by both her parents and her peers. She mentions in The Secret Crusade that her parents tried to force her to conform, which culminated in her first marriage at the age of 18 to Lord Peter Hallaton. She mentions that he was a decent husband, but he didn’t exactly appreciate her more boisterous nature. After all, in 12th century England (especially among nobility), women were to be seen, not heard. She also failed his expectations as a chatelaine and a wife, as she bore him no children. The Bishop of Leicester granted them an annulment to avoid embarrassment to both Peter and Maria’s family. When she returned, she was “persona non grata” to her family and the whole of Leicestershire, especially when her father had already spent her dowry. With no other options, Maria ran away to join the Third Crusade, where she eventually met Robert de Salbé.

You may notice that we don’t actually know a lot about Maria and her life before AC1, which is probably intentional. To me, though, that’s what makes her backstory fascinating – the implications of her environment and what we can reasonably deduce she went through based on historical context. I think anyone who’s taken a seventh-grade social studies class could tell you women had, like, zero rights in 12th-century England – even more so, noblewomen. Maria was raised to be a glorified broodmare – say nothing, have children (two boys and a girl, as she jokes), and run her husband’s household. Clearly, she was the exact opposite of all of these things. Something interesting about Maria’s first marriage is the fact that while it was an annulment, she specifically mentions in The Secret Crusade it was an annulment to save her family further embarrassment – which implies that the marriage was consummated, but all parties wanted it done with. I don’t think I need to elaborate on how common and horrific an experience like that could be, but I think it fuels Maria’s relationship later on with motherhood, especially since she mentions that she was completely uninterested in childrearing and birth (this is a key point I’ll touch on later).

So what? Why does her background matter? It matters because of how historical and cultural context tie in to help form who she is by the time she leaves for the Third Crusade – a desperate, twenty-two-year-old woman, divorced, ostracized from the only family and society she has ever known, having no other choice than to ditch England and head for the Holy Land unless she wants to become a nun. For many men and women alike in the 12th century, this was their only opportunity to become something more than what they were born as, whether it be a serf, a blacksmith, or a noblewoman. Many who left for the Third Crusade left to “take back the Holy Land,” but also to escape or improve their current standings. To me, Maria falls in the second category, and it is this desperation to escape her life that forms her most notable (and later, tragic) characteristic: her undying loyalty.

As a side note, it is also interesting to me that Maria chose to be a soldier rather than a nurse. This is more so my characterization of her, but I think that’s because a) she’s too damn proud and loud to be a nurse, and b) because if she was a nurse, she would more than likely live and be treated the same way she was at home. Truly, if she wants to escape the patriarchy, the only way a woman like Maria could at the time was to join it by blending in. Girly get some therapy.

We’re now at AC1 in the timeline. Hooray! We don’t know when exactly Maria joined the Templars or when she first met Robert, but we can probably assume it was not long after she joined the crusade. As we know from AC1, AC Bloodlines, and The Secret Crusade, Maria disguised herself as a man (more than likely a young boy since she’s got a voice that would fit right into Alvin and the Chipmunks) and was able to keep up the rouse long enough to rise in the ranks and show promise to people like Robert. For Maria, when Robert finds out she is a woman and yet elevates her further, it is the first time in her life that someone has appreciated her for her masculine qualities. It is why she develops an intense loyalty for Robert to the point of being willing to be his decoy, despite the fact she fully anticipated dying. For Maria, it would be her ideal end – fighting to the death for a cause she truly believed in. Not even really a cause, as we figure out later, but more so for a man she truly believed in – Robert. It would not be through the pain and subjugation of childbirth like most women of her standing, but a brutal fight like any other man.

And yet – she doesn’t. When Altaïr meets her, he’s undergone a whole development arc, whereas Maria (at this point 30, which is SO funny to imagine her fistfighting this 26-year-old frat boy) is at the start of hers. And it starts with Altaïr sparing her – the worst possible fate that could become her at this point in her life. Think about it: the only person who has given her an OUNCE of respect has asked her to essentially die for him by acting as his decoy. As Maria mentions in AC Bloodlines, by this point, she is also a step away from becoming a knight – and at this point, she’s also known as a woman among the Templars. And yet, she believes they have become her family, and she is willing to die for their cause and for Robert. When Altaïr spares her and kills Robert, he’s sentencing her to the life she ran away from and feared – being nothing more than a woman who is looked down upon with condescending snarls and disgust for who she is.

This is why when we meet Maria in AC Bloodlines, she is rightfully PISSED. We literally see her realize that any ounce of respect and power she had is completely gone because Altaïr spared her. She is so pissed, in fact, that she tries to kill Altaïr again. This is even funnier when you remember how much of a BITCH it was to fight her in AC1, but I digress. Altaïr has destroyed everything she has built in her life for the last eight years. He has taken her home, her mentors, her family, and her honor. And bro doesn’t have a clue in the fucking world.

It’s at this point that I’ll also analyze more about Maria’s relationship with the Templars. At first glance, yes, she was a Templar and believed in their cause. Really, though, it goes far deeper than that. It’s not necessarily that Maria believes in their cause – otherwise, it would’ve taken a lot more for Altaïr to sway her to the Assassins – but that she believes in the people. Again, from Maria’s perspective, the Templars (especially Robert) were the ONLY people in her entire life to treat her with dignity, and she is willing to die for them. She is willing to throw her honor to the ground and beg for forgiveness in front of Bouchard because, without the Templars, she is nothing. She is back to square one as a silly little girl trying to run from a life that would only subjugate her. It’s that recurring characteristic of undying loyalty to those who have given her the life she has always wanted.

And for Maria, it is immediately spat back in her face.

When Bouchard takes over in AC Bloodlines, he is a strict Templar Grandmaster. No consorting with women, periodt. And he flaunts this over Maria, taunting her. He is tearing the last ounce of respect she’d ever received and throwing it away. Every sacrifice she made for the Templars for the last eight years meant nothing, and it is crushing to her. She continues to be pissed off at Altaïr, who mentions that she’s more pissed at the Templars than at him. Once again, she is nothing more than a woman – an imprisoned one at that.

This is where one of my favorite Maria scenes (not that there’s many) comes into play. When she and Altaïr are sitting on the ship to Cyprus or wherever it doesn’t matter, Altaïr does something that no person has done for her before: he treats her with unconditional respect. As funny as his autistic ramble about Empedocles and philosophy is, there are so many assumptions that go into Altaïr’s conversation that I think help sway Maria to his side. When he talks to Maria, he speaks to her as an equal. He talks to her about philosophy because of course she would know about philosophy in his mind – to him, she is a soldier and a person first, and a woman second (shut the fuck about The Secret Crusade and him thinking about her as a lioness shut up shut up I low key hate it even though it’s funny). He is the first person in her life to speak to her as an equal and with respect with no strings attached. In fact, when Maria taunts him for leaving her cuffed even as he talks about free will, he lets her go. She may not like him at this point, but after this scene, you can certainly see that she respects him in how she speaks to him. BONUS: she’s not trying to outright kill him anymore! Hooray!

You can see the impact Altaïr and his conversation had on Maria when she confronts Shahar in her courtesan fit. There’s so many layers to Maria willingly dressing in such an exposing, vulnerable, and feminine way (keep in mind this bitch is Catholic, I know her guilt was going crazy), but what I’m going to focus on is her conversation with Shahar. When he speaks to her, he is gross and all but catcalling her, calling her a “little fox” and using a sultry tone. Maria is having NONE of it, and one can only assume this is a tone she has dealt with a thousand times over. This is also where we see the gears turning in Maria’s head. I’ve seen people criticize Maria for how quickly she flip-flopped, but I think that’s overlooking the reason that she WAS a Templar – they were the only people who provided her a home when she had none. If you’re desperate for anyone to treat you with an iota of respect, you’d do whatever they ask. After she talks to Altaïr though, and especially after realizing Robert was simply manipulating her, she is questioning the Templars’ ideologies and realizing this is not what she wants. It low key is like Alicent in House of the Dragons right now – she’s shocked that fighting against women fucked herself over. Maria is similar in that sense – she thought that by being what the Templars wanted and fighting for what they believed, it wouldn’t come back to bite her in the ass. But it did. She’s a woman before she’s a Templar, and the ideology of the Templars would see her subjugated just as she was before. It isn’t until after Altaïr’s spiel about free will and the challenges it brings that she realizes she has other options.

And that’s ultimately what brings Maria to the side of the Assassins – realizing her errors in thinking and wanting a way to redeem herself. The Assassins are her second chance, which is ironic given how many stories after hers would follow this same format of second chances. But it isn’t just the ideology change, either. It’s Altaïr. No, she does not have undying loyalty by the end of AC Bloodlines, but he’s certainly earned her trust and respect. He’s treated her like any other person without ever holding power or loyalty over her head. He does not manipulate her or exploit her – he respects her, and he earnestly tells her of the creed’s ideologies not to lure her in, but because he genuinely believes in the idea of dispelling the illusions of the world and wants to share it with her, whether she becomes an Assassin or not. That is what turns Maria into an Assassin at the end of the day: his respect for her and his understanding of the creed. And despite their issues, Maria chooses to follow him to the ends of the earth.

Now we’re at a really funny part of Maria’s story: we know basically NOTHING about what happens in between AC Bloodlines and AC Reflections. We know that sometime after traveling to Masyaf, Maria and Altaïr became a couple. We know they married in 1195 and gave birth to Darim the same year. Two years later, they would traumatize Desmond Miles by fucking on top of a castle, which is so fucking funny and only supports my characterization of Maria as a gremlin, because who the fuck else would make their husband climb up a giant ass tower for sex? We know she officially became an Assassin and would beg Altaïr to stop looking into the Apple. We know she would join Altaïr and Darim to Mongolia to kill Genghis Khan. And that is all we know for an approximately 30-YEAR PERIOD.

While there’s a lot I could talk about in that gap, like Maria’s relationship with other Assassins, I’m going to focus on her relationship with motherhood. As we established earlier, Maria had ZERO interest in being a mother or giving birth. This is a personal headcanon but I do not care because it’s MY analysis and I can do as I please, but I feel like she would’ve dreaded childbirth, especially given how English nobility acted about it (e.g., how people treated it like a scandal or disease) and how it was the leading cause of death for women until the 20th century. Yet, despite this, she had not one, but TWO children. She was like one away from the goal, and even then Sef had two daughters so really she fulfilled it. But why? What changed that she would be willing to do the very thing she left England to avoid?

I think it goes back to the reason she was disinterested in it in the first place. Like Maria says in The Secret Crusade, she didn’t want to just be a mother or a wife. Her ideal husband would treat her like any other man, taking her hunting or whatever else bullshit medieval stuff they’d do instead of scrolling through TikTok. She never said she didn’t want to be a mother. I think her hesitance stems from the fact that she didn’t want to SOLELY be defined as a mother or a wife. With Altaïr, however, that fear is pretty much gone. Since the moment she met him, Altaïr has always treated her with respect and admired the things she was once shamed for. Her strength is valuable as an Assassin. Her bluntness keeps him in check. Her ideas are admired rather than ridiculed. To Altaïr, Maria is not just a woman or even just an Assassin. She’s a person with her own experiences and ideas and fears and strengths and dreams. He loves her for every aspect of herself that was once frowned upon.

I remember a while ago seeing a Tumblr post from ye olden days (like 2012) talking about how because menstrual cycles were extremely irregular back in the day due to medieval diets and exercise, Maria would have to purposefully chill out to regulate her cycle to become pregnant. What that implies is that she trusted Altaïr so much that she was willing to settle down and have children because she knew it would not influence how he treated or loved her. Personally, I think this is true of Darim, but that Sef was an accident because it’s funnier that way, but regardless, the point still stands. Maria getting pregnant and becoming a mother is the opposite of what she thought she would ever want, but because she loved and trusted Altaïr so much, she was willing to have a family with him because she knew it would not come to define her. I think that is unbelievably sweet.

We also don’t really see Maria interact with her children very often, which I think is a fucking shame. When she does interact with Darim (we never see her with Sef, though we do see her reaction to his death), Maria is always supportive and encouraging. Again, this is more my headcanon territory but I really don’t care because I can do what I fucking please, but Maria low key feels like a boy mom to me, but not in the weird Freud way, lmfao. Like we established earlier, Maria’s key trait is her loyalty. I think this loyalty would be extended to her children. We know she’s loyal to Altaïr (it ends up killing her), but I feel like it would go insane with her children. When she learns of Sef’s death in The Secret Crusade, this woman breaks down in tears instantly. WHERE THE FUCK WAS THE MOTHERLY RAGE WITH ABBAS, UBISOFT. WHERE WAS IT. Anyways.

Masyaf is a pretty cutthroat environment to raise a child, especially when you consider that Abbas is apparently lurking in the background scheming during Altaïr’s reign. Something I wish we learned more about (and something I just find fascinating in general) is the political environment of Masyaf. Altaïr implemented a lot of changes to the Brotherhood that faced backlash, one of the key ones being allowing women in the order again (ahem, Maria). I know Maria said she was uninterested in the politics of running a house, but I do think she’d kind of have to play her hand in politics in Masyaf, kind of how Altaïr realizes he’s not exempt from politics since he’s literally shaping them. If Maria wants her kids to be safe, especially as sons of the Master of the Assassins, she’s gotta play her cards well. This is why I think it does make sense for Maria to calm down after having children to be more similar to the Maria we see in AC Reflections and AC Revelations. She can’t just fight everyone like she did when she was relying solely on herself. Now, she has people relying on her, and I think it makes sense for her character to chill out more (though without losing her spunk) to ensure her family is safe.

For those that have ever watched Magnificent Century, basically think about how Hurrem went from fighting everyone to playing her cards wisely so her kids wouldn’t die or do stupid shit. That’s how I feel like Maria would be.

Something else that’s interesting about Maria to me is her relationship with Altaïr. Duh, you’re probably saying, but hear me out. We know that while she and Altaïr were inseparable during their marriage, there was one thing that strained it: the Apple. It makes sense why Maria would be so pissed off at it. She’s seen Altaïr control men’s minds with it. She’s seen how it takes him away for days at a time with its secrets, to the point she is begging him to throw it away. Back to the point about loyalty to her family, whereas Altaïr seeks knowledge, Maria just wants her family protected and safe because she loves them – including her dumbass husband. It’s ironic that the very thing she fought about with Altaïr is the thing that killed her.

So we’re finally at AC Revelations, and I am truly shocked that you’re still here. Kudos to you. At that final confrontation scene with Abbas, that loyalty for those she loves comes to a head. When Altaïr whips out the Apple, Maria begs and pleads him to stop, because she knows if he uses the Apple to control someone, he will only be proving Abbas’s point, which will only fuck them over. In The Secret Crusade, we also have Malik’s head on top of this scene to make it worse. Maria’s position is again one of desperation. Her son is dead, one of her best friends is now just a head, and her husband is about to go sicko mode. She is screwed and she knows it. What she doesn’t know is that she’s about to be stabbed by Swami (I’m going with the revelations version shut up) in a last ditch effort to stop Altaïr from using the Apple. Altaïr doesn’t listen to Maria, and it kills her. He kills her.

… SO I HAVE THOUGHTS.

I think Maria dying from the Apple makes sense, I do. That’s not my problem. My problem is how AC Revelations basically dumbed her down to this motherly, homely figure which is the like, ANTITHESIS of what Maria is. Where was the feminine rage??? You’re telling me this woman would not be about to SLAUGHTER someone after learning that Sef died?? You’re telling me she would just pull an AltaïR thiS iSn’T yOu???????? Are you so fucking for real right now??? It pisses me off because it nukes her character. While yes, it makes sense for her to be a much calmer woman and 67 compared to 30, this is still Maria. Don’t act like she and Altaïr don’t have fucking anger issues and be so fucking for real.

Here’s my ideal scenario for what should’ve gone down. I think once they pulled Malik’s head out, there should’ve been all-out chaos rather than this bullshit “We killed everyone loyal to Altaïr before he arrived.” Maria should’ve been right there with them with a sword out. Altaïr, in a desperate attempt to calm everyone down, would take out the Apple and try to control everyone. If you’ve seen the long ass discussion about how Revelations fucked up Altaïr’s character arc, this also helps remedy that because Altaïr is pulling out because of his arrogance in believing he can control the Apple. News flash: he can’t. Maria, while fighting for Altaïr, would somehow be killed either by the Apple or like similar to how Swami accidentally killed her. Something along those lines where it is Altaïr’s fault. That’s how she should’ve gone out, not some weird pick me bullshit.

Anyways. RIP Maria Thorpe you would’ve loved Crusader Kings 3.

I definitely missed some points about her character but this is already 7 pages long on Google docs so I am NOT writing anymore. God bless.

TLDR she's a baddie and I need her so so so bad

[susansontag]

studio ghibli ranking list let’s go

(will include nausicaä and the red turtle)

the these-are-actually-bad section:

24. earwig and the witch

actually the only one I haven’t watched so it’s cheeky to put it here. but I won’t be watching it and no one will blame me.

23. ocean waves

who sincerely cares about these teenagers they’re so annoying. if the boys had been gay it would have honestly been homophobic.

22. pom poko

this film is about shape-shifting raccoon dogs waging a war on humans and there’s copious jokes about their testicles. so on paper a perfect film. execution wise it’s so long and so boring and you care about none of them.

the cure-for-insomnia section:

21. tales from earthsea

hayao miyazaki was right to walk out of this one even though he probably is a terrible father for having done so. some of the animation was really nice but these protagonists made me yearn for the ocean waves cast because at least they have semi-personalities.

20. castle in the sky

proof miyazaki was judging his son too hard for earthsea because this is basically his version of the same thing: a nice idea with good animation and the most boring boy/girl protagonists imaginable. has got that whimsy he does so nicely however.

the passable-films section:

19. the cat returns

but should he have? was that really necessary? has a scene of cats walking in a procession on their hind legs though so that’s a plus.

18. arrietty

visually gorgeous but otherwise a very run-of-the-mill adaptation of the borrowers, which in something that should feel wondrous is less than ideal.

17. my neighbors the yamadas

some harmless and inventive fun that you can put on in the background whilst eating lunch or doing some light yoga stretches.

the don’t-harm-me-I’m-right section:

16. howl’s moving castle

yes I do in fact understand the intricacies of the plot and I still don’t care. this is one of ghibli’s messiest films for sure, it can’t decide what it wants to be or focus on and the plot just seems to happen and then not happen for no good reason. I also think howl’s a whiny bastard and hate that sophie has to mother him and endure his contemptible man tantrums. a shame because she’s actually cool.

15. grave of the fireflies

it was sweet but I’ve watched more moving animated films set in war-time, even. I don’t have much desire to watch it again honestly but maybe I will at some point.

the this-is-getting-there section:

14. the red turtle

I liked it! an acquired taste but I really felt the harshness of the elements and the cruelty and the love. it's also very beautiful to look at, one of the most visually arresting ghibli productions.

13. only yesterday

a tale of two films with this one. the parts where she's a young girl are much more interesting, but if this had stuck the landing and it'd been more even overall, could have potentially been a favourite. alas.

12. the wind rises

a genuinely weird one in ghibli's lineup, in which miyazaki meshes two different stories together (one of inventive 'genius' and a doomed love story, respectively) in a likely attempt to try and grapple with his having chosen his career over all else, including family (noteworthy is that his wife was not able to retain her career as an animator). as a piece of art it's less whimsical and more mature than many of these films, but I struggle to not let my distaste for what it potentially represents get in the way of my appreciation for it as a film, but it's so blatantly personal that it's impossible.

the that-was-just-a-good-fun-time section:

11. nausicaä of the valley of the wind

aesthetically one of the coolest films on this list but I don't remember the story as well. great protagonist too. must have been great to experience when it first came out in the '80s.

10. porco rosso

I love this film about a tomboy mechanic and some pilot guy who went off to war and was so changed he is now a pig. watching it feels like if the mediterranean was so small it fit into your back pocket and was also populated by all your friends all your enemies and your ex-lover also.

9. from up on poppy hill

I found this one boring the first time I watched it but it really grew on me with subsequent rewatches. I really like her predominantly female household and the community they share in the backdrop of the rest of the drama is sweet. the bit of drama midway through is still batshit though but in a loveable, disney-would-never way.

the near-perfect section:

8. the tale of the princess kaguya

probably takahata's magnum opus with the studio, if slightly overlong. folktales are tricky because they tend to feel moralistic and the characters one-note if you're not willing to build on them but kaguya herself feels very spirited and alive. the prettiest on the list too I'd say.

7. my neighbor totoro

cozy late summer comfort film. perhaps even more special now because I was able to see the london production. cute!

6. when marnie was there

surprised this one has ranked so high for me but that's the power of tomboy lesbians heck yeah etc. also the fantastical element of this one is so up my alley and touches upon a particular kind of childhood nostalgia I have of being in old houses and imbuing them with magical qualities. the image of anna facing the house across the marshland is burned into my retina.

the I'd-die-for-her section:

5. princess mononoke

aesthetically too cool for school and has one of the best ghibli villains and female characters (lady eboshi). they really said all the spirits of the forest are going to die in this one but well it was a nice thought.

4. ponyo

my comfort movie of all-time! heartwarming! with another great female ghibli character in lisa, sosuke's mum who is legally allowed to drive like that apparently. also one I actually watched for the first time in my childhood when I was around 7 or so at an after school club. the subtitles taught me the useful and now underused gem of a phrase "bog off".

3. kiki's delivery service

asks the important questions such as: what if you were a young witch from a dying tradition who moves to a gorgeous town in sweden? what if your remarkable gifts were no longer appreciated due to rapid advancements in aviation technology? what if you could live in a bakery?

2. spirited away

when you're just a timid child who is scared of admittedly a lot and your parents manage to mess everything up spectacularly so now you're forced to work at the age of twelve for people who steal your identity. still one of the best honestly they may never top this as the peak of their artistic achievement.

1. whisper of the heart

have you ever been a struggling artist? have you ever been in love? have you ever been obsessed with john denver's take me home, country roads? in all seriousness love a story of two artistically inclined people inspiring each other and this has a unique feel compared to other ghibli films forever favourite probably. it feels like basically no one has watched it and that's a shame. rest in peace yoshifumi kondō.

[maximoffcarter]

Your type.

Pairings: Casey Novak x Alex Cabot.

Summary: Alexandra Cabot was known as the top of her class and the good girl of Law School. Casey Novak was known as the famous softball player and the tomboy of Law School. Both meeting each other at a coffee shop, both in different stages of their lives. Would it work?

A/n: I needed to do some kind of college au for our babies. I thought it was cute, so here is my creation of it hahaha. I dunnp if it's any good or not, but I enjoyed writing this, it's been a while since I've done a college au, they used to be my favorites before haha. Hope you guys enjoy this, leave comments, hearts, whatever you like and reblog so this gets some love🫶🏻

*not my gif*

Alexandra Cabot was top of her class. Many selfish and jealous people thought that she was the best just because she was a known person because of her last name. But the truth was that Alex was dedicated to school, she had always been, since she can remember; she spent her free days with books, she loved them. It wasn’t entirely a lie that her family had influenced her in getting into law school, but she was happy with her decision, and she was going to do anything to get to her goals, meaning, she wouldn’t let anything distract her from getting what she wanted. She was probably the only person in her class that didn’t go to parties or gatherings with her classmates, she didn’t go to the games the school held, she just focused on her studies. Did she regret it? Maybe. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to have a social life, she had her friend, but she knew that university was not about parties.

For two whole years it stayed that way, nothing had changed her mind, and she was still very much focused on her studies; that was until her eyes landed on a redhead. One of her classes had gotten canceled, meaning she had 2 hrs free to do whatever she wanted; so she decided to finish homework she had. She had thought about going to the library, but she decided she’d go for a coffee near her building, and she’d spend the two hours there. This was a coffee shop that she normally visited every now and then when she wanted to be at the library, the coffee, and the food in there was really good, and the environment was actually calm, and it helped her concentrate on the things she had to do. But as she sat down in her usual spot and looked around, she noticed a redhead taking an order. She had never seen her here, clearly, because she’d remember that beautiful smile. For a moment she was too stunned by how beautiful she was, she had stared way too longer that she didn’t notice her friend sitting right in front of her.

“Alex?”

Alex snapped out of her thoughts and stared at her friend. “H-Hi! Sorry. I uh…when did you get here?”

Erin chuckled. “I’ve been here for like 3 minutes. How long have you been staring at the redhead?” She grinned as she got her notebook and book out of her bag.

“I- what do you mean?” Alex chuckled nervously. “I was not staring at anyone, just…a bit lost. Thinking what I’m ordering.”

“Uhuh…as if you never order the same, Cabot.” Erin chuckled. “But okay, I’ll believe you. What are you ordering?” She raised her brow.

Alex sighed as she grinned. “Black coffee and a chocolate croissant.”

Erin laughed. “See? Why is it wrong that I caught you staring at the redhead? She’s really pretty.”

Alex shrugged. “I have never seen her here before.”

“She hasn’t been here for long. I saw her the day I came to buy us coffee. I think I heard she’s a law student too.”

Alex raised her brow. “Law student?” She nodded. “I can actually see that.” She said almost in a whisper as she got her things out.

“Alexandra Cabot is getting interested in someone after two years.” Erin smirked.

Alex looked up and shook her head rapidly. “I- Erin no! I just- I was-“

“Hi ladies! My name is Casey, can I offer you anything to drink or eat?” Casey smiled at both of them and then her eyes landed on Alex’s.

Alex cleared her throat as she looked up at Casey, trying to talk but all of a sudden, she forgot how to do that. Erin wanted to laugh but cleared her throat too, getting Casey’s attention. “I’ll get an iced latte with sugar please. And to eat, I’ll just get a muffin.” She then looked at Alex. “Alex? What are you ordering?”

“I- uh…black coffee and a croissant, please.” Alex offered a shy smile.

Casey grinned as she nodded. “Comin’ right up.” She then walked away, but not before she turned to look at Alex again, offering a smile.

Erin laughed and threw her head back. “Oh my, I never thought I’d live to see the day of seeing Alexandra Cabot getting nervous for someone! So.” She looked back at Alex. “Is your type redheads?”

“Jesus, Erin, drop it.” Alex sighed as she covered her face, blushing. “Let’s just-“ she sighed as she looked back at Erin. “Let’s get this done, we have class, and we need to hurry.”

“Avoiding. It is true that you always learn something new from people.” Erin chuckled teasingly as she opened her book.

Alex bit her lip as she looked at Erin for a moment, and then she turned her head to look at Casey. She had come out to Erin just a year ago, admitting that she had always been attracted to girls, but she never said a thing because she didn’t think it was relevant, but when Erin asked if she wanted to go on a double date with some guys, Alex thought it would be good to let Erin know that she was not into guys. She was relieved when Erin accepted her and never judged her, it was the other way around, actually, she was pretty much trying to get a date for Alex in every possible chance, but Alex refused reminding her that she only cared about school and not some dumb romance in university. But now…she had to admit that maybe a little crush on someone wouldn’t hurt. She didn’t actually have a type, she didn’t know if she did. But until now, all she knew, is that Casey could be her type.

********************

Alex sighed as she tried to keep her mind concentrated in the book she had in front of her, she was studying for finals and Erin was supposed to meet her at the coffee shop so they could study together, but at the end plans had changed and now Alex sat at her same spot, trying to focus on her book and hoping to not get distracted with the redhead. She didn’t even know if she worked that day, but the last time she had been going to the coffee shop, Casey was right there, and even if there was someone else taking orders, Casey was always the one that took their order. What Alex had been trying to avoid had happened; she had accepted to herself that she had a crush on Casey. She had been trying to avoid it, she had been trying to not think about her, but it was impossible after learning that she was also a law student, she was in her first year, so it’s not like they’d ever have same classes, but she had caught her in the hallways every now and then.

How did she know about this? Because of course Erin was encouraging her crush. She teased her every possible chance she had. She had also found out that Casey was in the softball team of the university, and it honestly made sense with how beautiful her body was. Alex tried hard to not think about Casey and about the new information that Erin had provided her, but in the last 4 months, it was kind of impossible not to think about Casey. That smile, those eyes, that voice. Alex was now lost, and she knew it. There was no turning back from this, unless of course, she tried to get over it or she found out that Casey had a boyfriend or something, which could break her heart…break her heart was probably too much. But she would feel sad? She was confused to say the least. It was just a stupid crush. That was it. A crush.

“Alex!”

Alex looked up from her book and her heart stopped for a moment as she stared at Casey, who was smiling at her. “Casey…hi.”

“You remember my name!” Casey chuckled softly.

How could I not remember it? “Yes, I do.” Alex chuckled. “You’re not working today?”

“Oh, I worked earlier. But I have finals, so they let me leave early. I actually just finished my shift and was going to stay around to study.” Casey smiled as she looked at Alex’s book. “I take it that you’re also studying.”  

Alex looked down at her book and smiled. “Yes…I uh…I am.” She looked back at Casey. “I’m just reading again, I already studied.” She chuckled nervously.

“Well, I’ve heard that you’re top of your class, so I believe you’re more than ready for any exam.” Casey grinned.

“You’ve…heard about me.” Alex frowned as she smiled.

“A little, yes.” Casey smiled. “I’m sorry I don’t wanna take your time. I- oh! I brought you this.” Casey placed a coffee and a small bag beside it. “Some encouragement to study.” She grinned.

Alex looked at the coffee and the small bag and smiled. “Is that…”

“Black coffee and a chocolate croissant. You always order the same.” Casey smiled. “I’ll see you around?”

Alex nodded. “Hey…do you…maybe want some help with studying? You can sit with me if you want to.”

Casey smiled. “Really?”

Alex nodded again. “Sure.”

“I’d actually appreciate that.” Casey smiled as she placed her backpack on the floor and sat down in front of Alex.

Alex knew that this wouldn’t really help her crush, but at this point, who really cared about it? She was going down, bad, and she knew it. Casey had heard about her, she knew her name, she had even learned her order. And the funny thing was that the very first time she met Casey, she had brought her a plain croissant because Alex had not mentioned she wanted a chocolate one, but suddenly Casey started bringing her the right order, and now she learned it, and even if it seemed nothing, it was everything to Alex. But then her mind started playing tricks on her. Why would someone like Casey want to be with Alex? Even hang out with her? It was surprising enough that Erin was her friend, they were totally different but similar at the same time, but they were able to build a close friendship. But Casey, she was younger by two years, but why would she find any interest in Alex? She was probably just being friendly, maybe she just wanted to know people who were older to have some sort of help in school, but the reality was that Alex didn’t care. The thought of helping Casey and being able to spend time with her made her feel good. This was so wrong, but she didn’t care.

********************

“Where are we going?” Alex asked as she sighed, crossing her arms as she waited for Erin.

Erin smiled as she walked to Alex, closing her closet. “We’re going to a softball game.”

Alex frowned. “We never go to those, Erin.”

“Now we are.” Erin grinned as she handed Alex a shirt with the softball team logo.

Alex stared at it and then realized what Erin was doing. “Erin.” She looked up at her. “No.

“Alex. Yes.” Erin smirked as she threw Alex the shirt. “C’mon, we’re gonna be late.”

“You made me come all the way here so you can embarrass me and take me to a game. Casey’s game.” Alex grabbed the shirt from her shoulder, looking down at it.

“It’s just a game! You get to see Casey play. You’re gonna tell me you don’t wanna see her.” Erin smirked as she turned to grab the rest of her stuff.

Alex sighed as she took off her hoodie and put the shirt on. “You’re gonna pay for this.”

Erin laughed. “You’re gonna tell me you haven’t been spending more time at the coffee shop.” She turned to look at Alex. “Oh, wait. With Casey, actually.”

Alex frowned. “I…haven’t.”

“Oh, yes you have. I saw you two days in a row, sitting with her.”

“I was helping her study!”

“So you introduced yourself?” Erin raised her brows.

Alex cleared her throat as she looked down at her hoodie. “She heard about me and knew my name…” she whispered softly as she looked up at Erin.

Erin smirked. “Oh, someone’s got a crush on you.”

Alex rolled her eyes. “Can’t we just go? Please.”

Erin chuckled. “Fine, let’s go.”

As they got to the field, Erin tried to get them to good stands so they could get a perfect look of the game. Erin went crazy buying food and snacks, but Alex was truly nervous that she’d be seeing Casey playing. In one of their meetings, Casey had talked about her playing softball and the training she had, which meant that she barely had any time to do anything at all, between school, work and practice, her days were pretty busy. So the fact that she had stayed hours with Alex meant everything to her, even if they had been mostly studying the whole time. Alex looked around as she sat down, her eyes suddenly landing on the redhead who was stretching. Her breath hitched as she noticed the tight uniform and how it hugged her body perfectly; she wanted to give herself a slap as she was focusing on her body, which was definitely not right. Her eyes went back to Casey’s face, and to her luck, Casey was already staring at her, a smile on her face as she waved. Alex blushed slightly as she waved back, smiling back at her.

Eventually, the game finally started, everyone around them screaming and clapping for the team. She didn’t even know what was supposed to happen in the game, but she was willing to stay focused for Casey. Erin tried to instruct her what was happening, but even if she tried to listen to Erin, she really didn’t understand a thing. Finally, Casey put on her helmet and grabbed her bat, earning loud screams as she walked to her base. Alex’s eyes lit up as she looked at Casey, smiling as she positioned herself; she had seen some baseball games with her father before, and so far, she knew that Casey’s team was winning, and if she hit a…homerun? Something. They’d win the whole game. Or that’s what her mind made up. She couldn’t help but scream and stand up when Casey started running fast around all the bases, the whole crowd going insane screaming Casey’s name. Erin and Alex jumped and screamed together as Casey’s team surrounded to celebrate the win, everyone cheering for them and throwing food and water. Alex’s eyes focused on Casey for a moment, and her smile slowly faded as she noticed a girl hugging Casey and placing her hand on Casey’s cheek, leaning in to kiss her cheek. Alex cleared her throat and looked at Erin, offering a small smile as her heart sank.

Alex had asked Erin if they could already leave, not wanting to stay there anymore, even if it meant that they’d lose the celebration and the team. Erin had drunk a lot of soda and water, so Alex was waiting for her outside the restrooms, wrapping her hoodie around her waist and crossing her arms as she looked around. A bunch of people kept celebrating and screaming, running around, and jumping. Alex never understood sports, and she couldn’t believe that Erin had convinced her to come just to have her heart hurt at the sight of another girl kissing Casey. She sighed softly, rubbing her face, and groaning softly.

“Alex!”

Alex uncovered her face and her heart stopped for a second as she saw Casey running to her. “Hey.”

Casey smiled widely as she stood in front of Alex. “Hi. I’m so glad I caught you. I wanted to say hi since I saw you at the start of the game.”

Alex cleared her throat. “Oh. Uh. Well hi.” She smiled. “Congratulations, by the way. Good game.”

Casey chuckled as she looked at the ground for a moment. “Thanks.” She looked back at Alex. “I didn’t think Alex Cabot was a sports girl.”

Alex huffed a laugh. “I am not.” She shook her head. “But uh, my friend Erin, she dragged me here. I’m waiting for her so we can go.”

Casey nodded. “Oh, got it.” She smiled. “Hey, uh. So…later we’re throwing a small celebration party, since this was the last game of the season. I was wondering…if you wanted to come.”

Alex stared at Casey for a moment, thinking that maybe she had heard wrong. “Uh…a party?”

“Yes.” Casey smiled. “I mean I don’t normally go to these parties, but you know, we won, thought it could be fun for once. I don’t really have to work tomorrow so. And I was actually going to call you, you saved me a phone call.”

Alex smiled softly. “So…even if I didn’t come…you were going to invite me?”

Casey shrugged. “Why not?” She grinned.

Alex nodded. “I uh…well, I don’t normally go to any parties. I don’t…really get invited but uh-“

“We’re definitely going!” Erin said as she walked out of the restrooms, smiling at Alex and then at Casey. “That’s if I’m invited too? If not, I’ll drop of Alex.” She grinned.

“Of course! I mean, the team is inviting a lot of people so.” Casey chuckled. “So, yes?”

Alex looked back at Erin and then at Casey, smiling as she nodded. “Sure. Where?”

Casey’s smile widened. “Uh…Tina’s house. Back Bay area, there’s going to be a big sign outside the building, so you won’t miss it. I can call you later and tell you the right address.”

“Sounds good.” Alex smiled.

Casey nodded. “Alright, I’ll see you then. Bye Erin.” She smiled before she walked away.

Erin’s mouth opened in surprise as she turned to look at Alex. “Alexandra Cabot going to her very first university party! Oh my! We gotta find you a perfect dress!”

Alex rolled her eyes as she sighed, turning to look at Erin. “Don’t get too excited, Er. I think I saw a girl kissing Casey’s cheek.” She started to walk, trying to hide the excitement she felt.

Erin frowned. “Oh, c’mon, Alex.” She followed her. “That doesn’t mean anything! I kiss you on the cheek too, doesn’t mean we’re dating.”

“I know but…” Alex scoffed. “Why would Casey Novak be interested in someone like me? Like seriously. I’m older than her, I’m…literally a nerd.”

Erin raised her brow. “You do realize that it’s obvious that younger people are fascinated by people of our ages. Plus, it’s two years. And!” She jumped in front of Alex to stop her. “You’re not the only nerd. Casey is top of her class.” She grinned.

Alex frowned. “What?”

“Uhuh. Laura was telling me the other day. We go to the same hair salon, and she was talking about how Casey was the smartass in their class. So her asking you to help her study? Yeah, that was definitely just to spend time with you, Cabot.” Erin smirked.

Alex shook her head as she tried to hide her smile. “Okay…even if she wanted that. I still don’t think she’d be interested in me.” She shrugged. “So…this. The party? It’s just a party and that’s it.”

Erin rolled her eyes. “If you say so. But. We’re still gonna dress you nicely. Comfortable. But nicely. If Novak doesn’t lay eyes on you tonight, we’re getting you someone else. Maybe we can get another redhead.” She smirked.

“Fine.” Alex grinned as she rolled her eyes.

********************

“You’re not gonna leave me alone, are you?” Alex asked as they walked to the house, looking at Erin.

Erin looked back at Alex and smiled. “I believe you’ll leave me at some point. But no, and if you want to go, we can go. Promise I won’t drink much.” She chuckled.

Alex sighed as she nodded. They walked inside the house and Alex was pretty surprised to find a big crowd, the music was a bit loud and there was barely any lights. Erin took her hand so they wouldn’t get lost in the crowd, trying to get to the middle of the house or somewhere where they could actually move and hear each other. They finally got to what seemed to be the living room, people were dancing and drinking, some were playing with the cups, some were making out. So this is what a university party was like, Alex was really not missing anything, this was just a mess and they seemed horny teenagers. In every single part, there were about 2 or 3 couples just making out. She thought that she only saw this in movies but no, it was pretty much real, and she was sure more people were upstairs, and she did not want to figure out what they were doing up there.

As she looked around the room, she saw Casey’s team gathered around in a corner, laughing and with drinks in their hands, and then there was Casey right in the middle. She smiled softly but then her smile fainted again as she saw the girl from earlier right beside Casey, her arm wrapped around her shoulder. Alex knew she had no point in getting jealous, but she was. But then Casey’s eyes landed on her, and Alex swore her smile widened as she saw Alex; she didn’t know if she had imagined it or not, but Casey’s eyes traveled down her body, and she nibbled on her lip as she started walking to Alex; she was thankful that she had let Erin dress her, Alex normally liked wearing nice clothes, but the skirt and the blouse along with the long boots that Erin had picked for her, were showing a little too much, but if that was getting Casey’s attention, then she didn’t mind one bit.

Her breath hitched as Casey got closer to her, her eyes also traveling down Casey’s body; Erin had joked before about Alex being into girls that didn’t exactly dressed girly, she had now seen Casey wearing her softball uniform, she had seen her wearing a skirt with a blazer for a presentation, her work uniform, and casual Casey. Party Casey looked like those girls from movies who were the ones that ruled over people, with a leather jacket, jeans and boots, and Alex couldn’t skip the shirt she was wearing, that showed Casey’s cleavage.

“I thought I’d have to call you to make sure you were coming.” Casey grinned as she stood in front of Alex. “You look nice.” She whispered softly but enough for Alex to hear her.

Alex chuckled nervously as she blushed. “You look nice too.”

Erin cleared her throat as she smiled at both women. “I’ll see myself out for a bit.” She grinned as she walked away, going to Casey’s friends.

Casey chuckled. “Can I offer you a drink?”

“I uh…I actually don’t drink that much.” Alex bit her lip as she looked at Casey.

“Oh, such a good girl, Cabot.” She grinned. “They have nonalcoholic drinks too. We can go to the kitchen to check.” Before Alex could answer, she grabbed her hand and pulled her to the kitchen, walking through the crowd.

Alex tried to stay as calm as possible, and then thought that a drink wouldn’t hurt, it could actually help her calm her nerves. Once they got to the kitchen, she stood close to Casey and smiled. “Actually, a drink wouldn’t hurt.”

Casey turned to look at Alex and smiled. “I can mix some vodka with soda or juice so it’s not too strong.”

“Whatever you drinking.” Alex grinned.

Casey couldn’t help but stare into her eyes, grinning softly. “You look beautiful with or without glasses, you know?”

Alex’s breath hitched again as she stared into green eyes. “Your eyes are beautiful.” She smiled.

Casey bit her lip as she smiled. “Thanks.” She then cleared her throat as she grabbed the drinks she was going to mix and two cups.

Alex looked around trying not to stare too much at Casey, and noticed Erin staring at her, a smirk on her face. She shook her head, a quiet laugh leaving her lips. She returned her stare to Casey once she saw her raising the cup and handing it to her. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” Casey smiled as she grabbed her own drink and took a sip of it. “So, is this really your first party?” She leaned over the counter.

“You said it, I’m a good girl.” Alex smirked as she huffed a chuckle. “I uh…I focus a lot on school. I rather keep myself busy with studying or with books.” She shrugged. “I don’t know…I was just never an extrovert.”

Casey nodded. “I get that. I mean…these parties can get pretty crazy.” She chuckled. “I normally don’t come to these, and if I do, I literally leave early.”

Alex tilted her head. “I thought you were one of those athletic girls that liked to party and be a heartbreaker.” She grinned. “But I heard you’re also sort of a nerd.”

Casey blushed slightly as she looked at Alex. “I uh…I mean…yes, I just.” She huffed a chuckle. “Who told you?”

“Oh, a little bird.” Alex smirked. “So, you asking me for help…?” She raised her brow.

Casey shrugged. “Maybe I just…wanted to have an excuse to talk to you.” She grinned as she tilted her head, green eyes never leaving blue ones.

Alex knew she was probably blushing, but she couldn’t look away from Casey, she could stare at her for as long as she possibly could. “Nice excuse.” She simply said.

They stayed in the kitchen for a little longer than they expected, finding that it was the most quiet place in the whole house, and they just wanted to talk. They were talking about everything but nothing specific at the same time, just making each other smile and laugh. Even if Alex hated the fact that there were a lot of people surrounding them, she loved that she was with Casey, and that she was actually willing to stay with her. But then there was a moment where they literally dragged Casey away from Alex, and Casey made sure to tell her that she’d be back with her as soon as possible. Alex just watched her being dragged away and back into the living room, leaving her a bit sad but also understood that this was a party for them after all. Her eyes finally landed on Erin who was already walking to her, a smirk plastered on her face.

“I see you’re having a good conversation with Novak. Guess we won’t have to find you anyone else.” Erin smirked.

Alex rolled her eyes playfully. “We’re just talking, Er. Nothing more.”

“You’re seriously still in denial that she’s interested in you.” Erin chuckled. “You’re literally perfect, Alex. You’re top of your class, you’re beautiful, you’re nice. Damn, you’re a good girl, anyone would want to have you.”

Alex chuckled as she took a sip of her drink, trying to hide her smile behind her cup. “She did mention that.”

Erin raised her brow. “That you’re a good girl?” Alex nodded. “She does not lose time.” She chuckled softly.

“Well, I think I lost her for tonight. So, whatever was happening between us, is over.”

“Don’t lose hope, Cabot. She could come back any time soon. They’re just doing the typical winning ritual.”

Alex frowned as she looked back at Erin. “Ritual?”

“They take shots, depending on the score they made.”

Alex raised her brows. “Is that even safe?”

Erin shrugged. “Not sure, but don’t be too surprised if your little redhead comes back all drunk.” She chuckled as she took a sip of her drink.

Alex sighed. “I guess.”

“Everybody!” Tina got up on the table in the living room, getting everyone’s attention as they turned the music down. “Those who want to play the bottle, gather around! We got drinks and dares!”

Erin turned to look at Alex. “Let’s go play.”

Alex frowned. “No way. I don’t want to have the bad luck of having to kiss some drunk person.”

“And what if that drunk person turns out to be Casey?” Erin smirked as she grabbed Alex’s hand and pulled her to the living room. “Count us in!”

Alex sat beside Erin and sighed as she looked at the people that gathered around. She was sure that these people were either the ones that were way too drunk, or were somewhere in the middle, and the rest just decided to ignore it or were too into their own things. Her eyes landed on Casey for a moment who was in front of her and laughing with Tina as the people started to play. The first few rounds were stupid things like ‘take off your shirt’ ‘drink two shots’ ‘kiss this person on the cheek’, making Alex realize that these people were a bunch of teenagers and couldn’t believe that most of them -if not all- were law students. She couldn’t help but laugh the moment the bottle landed in Erin, and it so happened that the other side landed on one of Casey’s friends, who dared her to go to a room with her. Alex’s eyes widened as Erin agreed, telling her that they had to loosen up, and then followed the girl. She was too distracted as she saw in surprised how they disappeared, but her attention was brough back when she heard yelling and clapping, her eyes landing in the bottle who was pointing at her, and the other end happened to be on Casey.

“Cabot and Novak!” Alex’s lips parted as she tried to say something, but right away Tina spoke up again. “Since Alex doesn’t know what to say, I dare you two to seven minutes in heaven!” Everyone started cheering on.

“What?” Alex simply said, her eyes landing on Casey who was already standing up, chuckling, and telling Tina something. She shook her head and walked to Alex, extending her hand to help her get up.

“C’mon.” Casey offered a sweet smile.

Alex gulped but grabbed Casey’s hand, standing up and following her upstairs. She could hear everyone yelling and clapping, some of them screaming both Alex and Casey’s names as they went up the stairs. Before she knew it, she was being pulled into a room, and as she looked around, she was sure that this was Tina’s room. She cleared her throat as she turned to look at Casey who was closing and locking the door, leaning her back on it as she looked at Alex, smiling softly.

“Casey…”

“We don’t have to do anything.” Casey smiled.

“Are you- seriously?”

Casey chuckled. “Seriously. I sat down there for Tina, it’s just a stupid game.” She shook her head. “And…I hate having to force people into doing something they don’t want to.”

Alex cleared her throat. “What can you get done in seven min, anyway?” She chuckled.

Casey shrugged as she laughed. “I’ve never been in this situation. But I do know you can do something. Make out maybe.”

Alex stared at her for a moment, biting her lip softly. “And would you?”

Casey frowned. “Would I what?”

“Want to make out with me.” Alex snapped.

Casey wetted her lips, her lip lingering between her teeth as she stared at Alex. “I might be a little drunk but…definitely.” She walked to Alex slowly, stopping just in front of her. “Would you?” She whispered softly.

Alex’s breath hitched as she stared up at Casey. She knew she was tall, and probably the boots that Casey was wearing made her a little taller, and she herself was tall, but she loved the fact that she had to look up at Casey. She bit her lip for a moment as she thought about her answer; she knew she had to think fast, the seven minutes could end any time soon. She nodded softly as grinned, and suddenly Casey’s hands were on her waist, and she leaned down to close the gap between them. Alex’s hand went to Casey’s neck to pull her impossibly closer to her, their lips moving against each other’s just perfectly.

Before her mind could register what was happening, Casey was pulling her to her and turned her around to press Alex against the door, Alex moaning against Casey’s mouth which gave Casey’s tongue access to dive in. Alex’s hand got lost in Casey’s short her, pulling her impossibly closer. Casey’s hands rubbed Alex’s sides, accidentally making Alex’s blouse rise up and she took the chance to make contact with Alex’s skin. They finally broke from the kiss, both panted heavily, but as Alex opened her eyes to look at Casey, Casey’s lips landed on her jawline, throwing her head back against the door as a quiet moan left her lips. Casey trailed kisses down Alex’s jawline to her neck, kissing and nibbling softly, she then looked up again to kiss Alex again, and just as her hand traveled down Alex’s hip, a loud knock on the door made them part away from each other.

“Seven minutes are over guys! Get your clothes on!”

Alex panted heavily as she looked at the door for a moment and then her eyes returned to Casey. She couldn’t help but chuckle at herself as she figured she was now part of those horny teenagers she was judging when she got to the party. Casey ran her hand through her hair as she grinned, looking down at the floor as she tried to hide the redness on her cheeks.

“We should uh-“ Alex cleared her throat as she fixed her blouse. “We should probably…”

Casey nodded. “Yes.” She chuckled as she looked up at Alex. “We should go back.”

Alex nodded, offering a shy smile. As she turned to open the door, she felt Casey’s hand on her wrist, bringing her attention back to Casey. Casey’s hand went to Alex’s neck and pulled her close to her, kissing her lips slowly and tenderly, as if they had all the time in the world. Their lips once again met in a perfect rhythm, making Alex’s stomach turn in a good way. Casey then smiled against her lips, pecking them once more before she pulled away.

“Now we can leave.” Casey grinned.

Alex nodded. “Sure.” She breathed out as she smiled, accepting Casey’s hand in hers.

Alex felt everyone’s eyes on her as they walked down the stairs, but her eyes were only focused on Casey. Casey never let go of her hand, walking back to the kitchen, both quietly deciding that they didn’t want to be involved in the game anymore. Alex tried to find Erin for a moment before she brought her attention back to Casey, smiling softly.

“I’ll get you something to drink.” Casey smiled.

“Can I just get some water, please?” Alex smiled.

Casey nodded. “Sure. I need to sober up a little.” She chuckled as she kissed Alex’s hand before she went to find more cups.

Alex sighed happily as she watched Casey moving around the kitchen. The smile never leaving her smile as she leaned against the countertop, but her moment was interrupted as she felt a hand on her shoulder, making her turn thinking that it was maybe Erin. And then she frowned as she found the girl she had been previously jealous of right in front of her.

“Hi?” Alex offered a small smile.

“You really think you got Casey just because you got seven minutes in a room with her? You’re not Casey’s type. We know who you are, Cabot.”

Alex frowned as she shook her head. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“You’re daddy’s girl. I’m sure you’re in school just because of your last name, and if you think you’re gonna get Casey, you’re very wrong. I might’ve let Casey have her fun tonight, but she’s normally always with me. Casey belongs to me.”

“I can definitely tell. Because she’s been with you the whole party, huh?” Alex raised her brow, giving her a defying stare as she crossed her arms.

The girl laughed as she shook her head. “Just because your friend dressed you up for tonight and you got read of your glasses, doesn’t mean you can take Casey. Didn’t you hear? She was supposed to get your attention, a bet was made.”

Alex frowned. “What?”

“Oh, you really think Casey was interested in you? Please. Look at you and look at her. Gotta say that you left it pretty easy for her to win the bet. So congrats to you too. Maybe if Casey chooses, she’ll give you half of the money, but you don’t need it, do you?” The girl smirked as she walked away.

Alex suddenly felt lightheaded as the words played in her mind over and over; she had to be lying. Casey wouldn’t do that. All this time, all those meetings they had, Casey inviting her here, being so sweet and kind even if she’s not fully sober. Did she really do this for a bet? Was she just being nice to win some money? She had to be joking, this was definitely a lie. But…it also made sense at the same time. The sudden interest in Alex, wanting her help to study even if she didn’t need it, her inviting her to the party, and coincidentally the bottle landing in them while she was distracted. They had planned this. She had fallen in Casey’s game. The thought made her feel sick to her stomach.

“Alex?” Casey placed her hand on Alex’s shoulder to get her attention. “You okay?”

Alex took a deep breath as she looked back at Casey, her eyes getting teary. “How much?”

Casey frowned. “What?”

“How much…was the bet?” Alex snapped, trying to hold back her tears as she stared at Casey.

Casey shook her head as she looked at Alex, confused. “I don’t…what bet?”

Alex scoffed. “I knew it was too good to be truth.” She grinned. “You, suddenly taking interest in someone like me. You also believe I’m nothing more than my name, right? Was it fun, Casey? To drag me into your stupid high school game so you could get some money?”

Casey placed the cups on the counter and looked back at Alex. “Alex, what are you talking about? I don’t think that. I-“

“Save it, Casey. I knew this was way too good to be truth. But don’t worry, the bet ended the moment you took me to the room, right? So whatever this was, ends here. I don’t wanna see you again.” Alex gave her a cold look before she walked away from Casey.

Casey frowned as she tried to follow Alex. “Alex! Wait!”

Just as Alex was walking to the door, she ran into Erin who was just coming down from the stairs, her laugh died the moment she saw the look on Alex’s face. “Alex?”

“Let’s go. P-Please.” Alex cried out.

Erin’s heart sank as she turned and saw Casey trying to get to them. “Let’s go.” She placed her hand on Alex’s back and they both walked out of the house as fast as they could. Leaving behind a confused Casey.

The whole ride back to Alex’s apartment was quiet, Alex staring at the window as she quietly cried, her arms wrapped around herself. Erin kept checking on her but decided to save her words, she knew Alex needed a moment to process whatever had happened back there. There had only been one time that she had seen Alex this way, and she thought she would never see her like this again, so it broke her heart. As they made their way to Alex’s apartment, Alex let out a heavy sigh and opened the door, letting Erin walk in first, followed by Alex. She closed the door behind her and leaned her head against it, her whole body shaking as she cried once again. Erin dropped her bag and walked to Alex, wrapping her in a tight hug as Alex sobbed, turning to vanish in her arms.

“Lex, what happened?” Erin whispered softly.

“I-“ Alex sobbed as she shook her head. “I was an idiot.”

Erin pulled away enough to look at Alex. “Did Casey did something to you?”

Alex looked at Erin at the mention of Casey, feeling her heart breaking even more. “I was a bet.”

Erin frowned. “What?”

“That bitch…the one I saw Casey with…she told me that there was a bet, and that’s why the sudden interest in me. I knew it was too good to be truth, Erin. I just knew it.” Alex cried out, covering her face.

Erin sighed loudly. “Lex, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault. I let myself fall.” Alex sobbed as she shook her head. “Why did this happen?” She whispered softly.

“I don’t know.” Erin kissed her head softly as she wrapped her in another hug.

********************

Alex walked through the hallway to get to her classroom, feeling like everyone was staring at her and were laughing at her. She was sure that half of the school already knew what had happened back there, and it now made sense why all of them were cheering for them to go upstairs. They were cheering for Casey to win the fucking bet and she was so proud of it. She played it so well that she was so ashamed of herself for not seeing it, focusing on how sweet, kind, and beautiful she was, it never crossed her mind that she could do this to Alex. After all, her assumption of Casey wasn’t entirely wrong. She was indeed a heartbreaker. Her trance was interrupted as she ran into someone, almost losing her balance and making her books fall to the floor.

“I’m sorry!”

Alex knelt to pick them up but the person in front of her got them before her, making her look up to find Casey in front of her. “It’s fine.” She snapped as she stood up, followed by Casey.

Casey handed her the books and nibbled on her lip for a moment. “Alex…”

“Save it.” Alex snapped as she looked at Casey for a moment before she walked away.

Casey sighed loudly as she kept walking. This was truly a nightmare for her. The fact that Alex really had believed everything that Rachel had dared to say hurt her and made her a bit upset, but she understood where Alex was coming from. The moment she laid eyes on Alex, she knew she was completely fucked, not being able to take her eyes away until she realized she was being a creep. For months she just stared at Alex and tried her best to always be the one taking their order. She cursed herself once she realized that she had gotten Alex’s order wrong the first time, so she learned it for her, and was happy whenever Alex showed up at the coffee shop. Taking a chance to talk to her had been a real challenge, thinking that Alex would completely push her away and ignore her, but was happy once she realized Alex might be interested in her too. But now, that was all gone.

Erin walked into the coffee shop and looked around, trying to find Casey who was behind the counter. She walked to her and leaned over the counter. “Can I talk to you?”

Casey looked up from her notebook and nodded. “I’m taking five!” She walked to the back door and walked to Erin, sitting with her at a table in the corner. “Erin-“

“What the fuck were you thinking? Are you seriously in middle school to make a fucking bet with my best friend?” Erin snapped, not giving Casey a chance to speak.

“Let me explain.” Casey sighed. “There was no bet. There never was.”

Erin frowned. “What?”

Casey bit her lip as she tried to hold back tears. “I never had the intention of hurting Alex. Everything I did, I did it because I wanted to. Because I had been looking at Alex for so long and I took my chance.” She shook her head as she looked at Erin. “I was never involved in any bet. Rachel was jealous when she found out I was into Alex. She’s-“ She scoffed. “She was fucking childish. I’m too old to do those fucking bets. I like Alex. I never meant to hurt her, or even take advantage of her.”

Erin sighed as she leaned back in the chair. “Well, shit.” She shook her head. “I knew Rachel was no good.”

Casey scoffed. “She thinks she can get whatever she wants.” She shook her head as she looked down at her hands. “And now Alex hates me.”

“She’s hurt, Casey.” Erin shrugged. “She really believed every word Rachel told her. Alex…she overthinks. She has anxiety. She couldn’t get in her head why you would be interested in her.”

Casey sighed. “But you believe me, right?” She looked back at Erin.

Erin offered a small smile. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone being so consistent with Alex. The way you two look at each other…nothing I had ever seen.” She shrugged. “I love Alex. But I believe you. And you gotta make this right, Casey.”

Casey nodded. “I know. But…she hasn’t been here in two weeks.”

“I can give you her address.” Erin shrugged. “She’ll probably kill me but…I hate seeing Alex so sad.”

Casey smiled. “I’d be forever thankful.”

Erin grinned. “And I thought this shit only happened in movies.” She got a piece of paper out of her bag along with a pen. “Our classes end at 4 pm. She should be home by 5 pm.” She handed it to Casey. “And you know better than to fuck this up, Casey.”

Casey nodded. “I know.”

********************

Alex groaned as she walked to the door. “Erin, I told you I wanted stay in today. I’m tired of you coming at this hour and trying-“ her voice died down as she opened the door and saw that it was not Erin.

“I’m…sorry. I just ended my shift, and I…couldn’t come earlier.” Casey offered a shy smile.

Alex shook her head. “What are you doing here?”

Casey sighed. “You’ve been avoiding me. And I want to talk to you.”

Alex scoffed. “Casey…seriously. We’re old enough to do this and-“

“And then you know I’m old enough to be doing some stupid things as getting involved in a high school bet.” Casey snapped.

Alex stared at her for a moment and sighed softly, stepping aside as she let Casey walk in. “Come on in.” She whispered softly.

“Thanks.” Casey said softly as she walked into the apartment. She turned to look at Alex and smiled a bit as she noticed she had never seen Alex dressing so comfortably.

Alex closed the door and turned to look at Casey, frowning. “What?”

Casey looked down at her hands as she smiled. “You uh…you look really cute.”

Alex tried to hide her smile as she crossed her arms. “Can I offer you a drink?”

“Are we switching roles now?” Casey grinned.

Alex couldn’t help but grin slightly. “Case…”

“I never meant to hurt you, Alex.” Casey said almost in a whisper. “There was never a bet.”

Alex sighed as she looked down at the floor. “Why should I believe you?” She then looked back up at Casey.

“Because I don’t lie.” Casey shook her head. “I know better than to lie. And I never once lied to you. I…” she scoffed. “Everything that Rachel said, it was all a lie. She was jealous. She hated the fact that I was falling for you, and that I was trying to get your attention, and I-“

“You’re falling for me?” Alex frowned.

Casey stared at Alex with wide eyes. “I- Alex. I uh-“ she cleared her throat. “I just-“

“Who’s nervous now?” Alex grinned.

Casey huffed a laugh. She looked at her hands for a moment and nibbled on her lip. “I really didn’t want to hurt you. I didn’t take you to the room because they were going to pay me.” She smiled shyly as she looked back at Alex. “Tina noticed you were distracted, everyone was drunk. I moved the bottle.”

Alex raised her brows, a smirk appeared on her face. “Makes sense.”

Casey laughed softly. “I was scared that you’d reject me. I didn’t want to take advantage of you. I just…really wanted to kiss you.” She smiled.

Alex tilted her head. “So no bet?”

Casey shook her head. “No bet. And yes…I am falling for you, since the first time I saw you, I knew I wanted to do anything in my power to get your attention.”

Alex smiled sadly, looking down again at the floor. “I really believed her.”

Casey walked slowly to Alex, her fingers going under her chin to make Alex look up at her, smiling softly as she fixed Alex’s glasses. “You look beautiful without glasses but…I really like to see you with them.”

Alex blushed slightly as she smiled. “You should be upset that I snapped at you, and that I didn’t believe you.”

“That’s childish. We’re both old enough for those games.” Casey grinned. “I’m sorry, Alex. I really am. But if you give me the chance…I want to make things right. I want to take you on a date.”

“You’re cheesy.” Alex smirked.

“And you like that, don’t you? It’s the type of thing you only see in movies.” Casey chuckled softly as she placed her hands on Alex’s neck.

“Yes. I want you to go on a date with you.” Alex smiled, placing her hands on Casey’s waist, and leaning in to kiss her lips softly.

Casey smiled for a moment against her lips, but brought their lips back together, the same butterflies as the first time showing up in her stomach.

…

“Cabot being the good girl and Novak being the tomboy.” Munch laughed along with Fin.

Alex rolled her eyes. “We stuck with our roles.” She smirked as she looked at Casey.

Casey shrugged. “And we made it work perfectly, even now after all these years.” She smiled as she leaned in and kissed Alex’s cheek, fixing her glasses. “Only took a date to have her wrapped around my finger.”

“Oh, says the one that was the cheesiest of the both of us. Bringing me chocolate croissants with my coffee, flowers almost every week, prepared unexpected dates.” Alex smirked.

“And you loved those. And still do.” Casey leaned in to peck her lips.

“Just get married already.” Elliot teased as he took a sip of his drink.

“This is really out of a movie, you two are too cliché.” Olivia chuckled as she looked at them.

“We wouldn’t want it any other way.” Alex grinned as she chuckled, rolling her eyes at the teasing.

[roanofarcc]

Hi there fellow still stuck in the twisters brain-rot. Noticed you wrote for both Javi as Tyler and have a great in-sight on their personalities so I just need to know your opinion! The both of them give girl dad to the max vibes, each in own different ways and I cannot explain why they just do. S'that just me?

you are sooo right!!

tyler gives girly-girl dad vibes. like he’s painting his nails to match his daughters. he buys her a pink cowgirl hat and matching boots & they eat cotton candy while walking around the county fair. he teaches her all things storms/weather but she loves the sunshine and HATES thunderstorms. he probably would buy her a pony if she asked too. like I’m picturing tyler & his little equestrian prodigy. Or he has a really dramatic theater kid and tyler doesn’t what’s going on but he’s happy to be there! he has a habit of cheering her on like he’s at the rodeo or a game at curtain call.

javi seems more like a tomboy girl dad. like he’s learning how to braid her hair for softball or basketball or something. he just give me “I hated sports in high school but I’ve accidentally raised an athlete” vibes?

javi and tyler both strike me as emotional dads though. every graduation they are crying. prom?? forget about it. they are just both very loving and supportive

[calissarowan]

So, the new teaser video…

Let’s start off here. Can I just say that I’m in love with Flora’s outfit? Absolutely in love. I think it’s beautiful and suits her to a t. I actually really like Aisha’s too. I like that it isn’t too complicated, has a similar colour scheme to her original outfit, and that she’s allowed to dress more athletically. Tecna’s is lovely, though I’m not so sure about the colour, to be honest. Don’t know why. Maybe it’s how similar it is to the background. Musa’s a tomboy again! And she has her iconic bunches back! The outfit is actually really cool, I like it.

Oh, Stella…what are those pink things?! What are they? They have zip edges. Why? I like her hair, but bunches on Stella? I don’t know. She had them for Love and Pet, I guess. The top is cute, but the skirt is a disaster. Just…what was wrong with making it gold? I saw designs for that, they were pretty. A lesson I’ve learned from designing OC’s is that you don’t have to throw detail at something for the sake of it. Please don’t. Seriously, it’s hurting my eyeballs.

I actually love this hair. It’s gorgeous. The top, I could take or leave, but the hair is amazing. I love that her hair changes for her fairy form; they did that in the og, and I love it.

Flora is probably the prettiest in this redesign. She’s just so beautiful. And she has a version of her old bangs! Yay! Her jacket is gorgeous, gotta say. Also, from the sounds of things, she’s actually going to be Latina in this, which I really like. Gorgeous girl.

Continuing with Flora, we get clips of her transformation! And she looks nice! The choreography is really good, with very smooth animation, though this design is almost more detailed than Enchantix, which feels kinda off to me, honestly.

Hoping to God that this is Wizgiz, because it won’t be Alfea without him.

I actually love this design. It gives Oxford or Cambridge vibes, though I miss the old Alfea. I miss the pink. Baby pink isn’t Stella’s thing, it’s Alfea’s. At least in this design I can see how they have space for everything, which I did always wonder, honestly.

And we get a peek at Bloom’s transformation. I like Flora’s better, honestly. I’m glad we get Bloom in blue again, but…something about this doesn’t vibe with me. I think the shade is just the tiniest bit wrong. I do like it, though. But, again, feels too detailed for a base form. Maybe we aren’t getting higher forms, but I don’t want to be robbed of Enchantix.

Wo, some basic thoughts on what we saw in the new video. I like it. Not as much as the old version, and we’re still lacking any wizards, but I like it. I’ll be watching. What does everyone else think?

[domxmarvel]

Just as you are

Masterlist    

Order:15

Large frappe with a green apple eclair

Malleus x Tomboy!Female!Reader-“You’re the most beautiful being on the earth”

"Will you join me in Briar valley for my birthday?" 

"I've never been there before,but of course I'll go with you"

"Perfect,I can't wait to show you all my favorite places. You'll love it there"

You knew that Malleus was the prince of Briar valley,yet you were still surprised that they would be planning a ball for his birthday. It shouldn't have been,but maybe spending so much time with him made you forget that he is royalty. However the idea of a ball made you nervous,you knew you'd probably have to wear a dress. Which you didn't feel comfortable in,but you didn't want to disappoint Malleus,especially on his birthday. He led you through the castle,pointing out various rooms. 

"And this is the room you'll be staying in" He stopped at a room. "My room is just across from yours,if you need anything let me know. I'll leave you to settle in,someone will be by with your outfit for tomorrow night" 

"Is it a dress?" You asked,not looking him in the eye.

"No,it's not. I thought you wouldn't like it,so I got you a suit that matches mine" You hugged him before he could finish his sentence. 

"Thank you"

"Y/N I love you,and I would never want you to change for me because you’re the most beautiful being on the earth" You pulled him down and kissed him,he picked you up and suddenly you felt something soft against your back. Quickly realizing he had pushed you onto the bed,still not let go of your lips. Not until you pushed him away so you could breathe. 

"We can't do this here,what if someone walks?" Just as you asked,there was a knock on the door,he immediately got off of you and opened the door. He had a brief conversation with someone before closing the door. You had moved next to him,but the second he closed the door,he picked you up and moved back to the bed.

“Don’t worry,I made sure no one will bother us” Grabbing his horns,you pulled him down,you could already feel his hands on your waist to pull you even closer. And immediately you knew you messed up by grabbing his horns,the look on his face made it obvious. 

“Malleus?” He flipped you over,pressing his cock against your ass. You soon felt his fangs bite down on your neck.

You held onto his horns as his grip on your hips,he wasn’t holding back in the slightest. You could feel the ground shaking with each thrust,you could barely make noise other than moans. You let go of his horns,instead wrapping your arms around his shoulders. He stopped.

“Is everything alright?”

“Everythings great”

“Why did you let go?”

“I didn’t want to accidentally hurt you”

“Darling,I’m not that fragile. I want you to hold on as tight as you can” You moved your hands back to his horns. It was like you flipped a switch,he was back to his brutal pace. You kissed him,gripping his horns tighter and using them to keep him still. He was still thrusting while kissing you. “Y/N,you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen and I want you by my side until our very last day”

“Malleus,what do you mean?”

“I want you,all of you. I want you to be my queen”

[dr3am5scape]

Got Attention for an Athlete Player

(Football Sevika x Cheerleader Fem reader)

Summary: Your a cheerleader who was caught getting attention from a hot known athlete, Sevika in football practice. You couldn’t help but fall deeply in love with her.

| Request are open in comment or on dm (message) whenever I’m available. Hope you enjoyed reading this and be doing more throughout Christmas break. Praying for this finals to be OVER ALREADY 😭 |

You was a cute cheerleader in college for the next football league game they were having. You’ve been a cheerleader practicing your part of the role to at least do something throughout college life without making yourself bored. You done this about a few weeks and was doing well, until during practices this afternoon, you were playing your role and then someone caught your attention. This athletic fine woman from your eyes, darting at her. And only thinking about is her in your own mindset. Her muscular arm and biceps showing out from her gear. The helmet she had colored black and red. She was quite tired after playing football with the boys, (ofc she’s a tomboy) and had to take her helmet off to feel the wind breezing on her face as she sighs deeply looking up for a second and then grabbing her water bottle from the bench and drank some before going back on practicing for the game. You kept watching her as you weren’t even listening to your own coach from cheerleader team.

Sevika was tackling the other players and move quick to be prepare of catching the football to herself and drifts off quickly to reach the goal. “GO SEVIKA! GO GO GO!”You shouted far distance away from the strong women. Not sure how you even got her name in the first place or if you remember it (Probably ask Vi once), you was so eager to see her play. The moment you started cheering, Sevika glances in the direction to see the one of the main cheerleader who was yelling. At first she didn’t understand what happened but suddenly she felt this pleasant feeling that crept into her. The cheerleader team was already annoyed from your excitement, along with your coach you never like when you signed up for this cheerleading stuff.

Practice was now over just for the day, well evening actually. You pack up stuff from cheerleading, including Pom-poms and the outfit. As soon you came out of the women locker, you saw Sevika’s height talking to someone in front of her, like they were blocking her face. Just when you was about to move quickly, cuz how you would blush like crazy and end up screaming lol, and unexpected thing had come. Sevika quiets down with her group of one of the boys, and turn towards you. She smirk showing her attractiveness face and curve body as she turn half way like she was in her flirting moment. “You were the girl who cheered for me?” Sevika chuckles.

You felt your chest in body heat and your cheeks turning red. You could hear and see she was approaching closer to you which got you startled. “Yeah yeah that was me.” You quiets down. You landed at the wall that was near you, with Sevika leaning her body against you admiring your adorable looks as you couldn’t do nothing but hear your screaming of desire all over your head. You could also hear some of the boys were snickering behind their backs, mumbling and whistling seeing the whole scene just expose out of nowhere. However Sevika ignore all that. She pulled back after observing your beautiful looks from top to bottom. “Thanks that you were able to cheer for me. At least someone enjoys what I do. It kinda made my day bit better,” says Sevika extending you a hand trying not to make the conversation more awkwardly. “I’m Sevika.” You hold onto her hand blushing like a maniac (like chill. I won’t even handle myself well😭😭)

“I’m y/n.”

Sevika smile warmly, eyes looking down at you. “Nice to meet you, Y/n. Am glad we could finally meet for the…first time.” You guys were both blushing red. “However, it’s a pleasure. I must get going. Have many duties to do,” Sevika says pulling back. You understand and wave at her. “Hope to see you another time.” Sevika look you back close to exiting out the building. “Until we meet again, y/n. Good luck out there.” The tall woman waves and disappeared. As soon you came home from the bus, you drop all your stuff in your room and lay on bed, thinking about the bold woman you were just talking to. You dreamed of her the entire night.

Next day (Afternoon-1:30pm)

In the locker room, you was getting pushed around by some girls for no reason. Your backpack fall including yourself on the floor, not wanting to do more cheerleading practice after that issue. You’ve been bullied quite some time since you got in the league of cheerleading and all the girls who were involved seeing you cheer for Sevika so loud, that they were thinking you super annoying and how much they hated you. Anyhow, you move directly to a corner of the wall not trying to tear up. You were pretty upset and tired. “Why did I signed up for this cheerleader shit?” You huff and did your best to stay confident without letting anyone taking you down again. Then you head out to see the whole football field waiting to see Sevika shows up.

In your mind you felt not cheerring or shout during practice. Probably people would think your some kind of fool doing, while everyone is practicing. You just wanted to make Sevika proud. 🥺💕 In your zone, you then saw Sevika and her other team getting ready for position as if their doing an actual game. But ofc your annoying ass coach snap his finger straight at you. “Hey! Get back to work! We don’t have time!” The coach ordered you to do so. While you were getting back in position with the other girls, you tried your hardest to focus on what you were doing but the thoughts were still in you of the woman who played so well. It’s like you want to watch her movement every time you would see her play football.

And just like that you were snatch by the coach. (Ain’t letting that SLIDE) Some of the girls laugh at you getting pulled back away. Even Sevika saw the situation which kinda got concern. Your coach immediately upfront you toward the wall looking pretty pissed. “Y/n if you don’t pay attention during practice, you would be banned from cheerleading at the next game.” You were silent hearing him shout at you. All you could say was “yes,” looking down on the ground. “Won’t do it again, coach.” After practice was over, you throw your outfit in the locker and slam the mess out of it. “DAMN IT!” You shouted not trying to have others hear you including the bullies. You try hard not to cry in front of people but thank god the hallways of the stadium was empty. But just then, Sevika was about to put her helmet on for further practices until she suddenly collided you. She stumbled, even you as you got on top, which thankfully no one was at the area you two were. You got up on your feet, fluster hard. “Sorry…” you said rubbing your neck. “It’s fine. I can’t be mad at you, dear.” Did Sevika just say “dear”!? Your heart pounding inside not trying to show out your true feelings but possibly Sevika might can tell. “I saw what happened earlier that coach of yours. Sorry you got kicked out. I should’ve stop him from doing that.” You sigh and nods. “It’s okay. I deserve to get kicked out. I was already tired of being in it.” Sevika nods as well. “I can feel it,” soft and gentle feeling appearing from the woman’s voice. “ You know just as I even look back on your excitement…” she chuckles “you were pretty much fascinated on the football field~” Sevika smirked trying to make the clear that she was hitting up on you.

You chuckle looking away. “I couldn’t help myself, Sev.” Her mocking but affectionate smile flashed on her face looking down at you. “Can’t deny it, can you~” Sevika says putting her hands on your hips. You fluster more and laugh softly. “No. It just I have glasses on see” (which I have one). Sevika pulls her hands back laughing softly as well, making you feel weak onto the floor. “Don’t even start blaming on glasses sweetheart. I would still see it through your eyes just as I did now~” She made sure no one else heard you two together somewhere in the stadium area. Everything was okay for now so she was able to take of her helmet revealing her short mullet hair (I WOULD GO FREAKING CRAZY) and slightly tired eyes from practicing.

“Your so…so pretty.” You were breathtaking just watching her look from the light about her head. This moment you really wanted to go for a kiss but you just met her like a few days ago. You really wanted to go and let her explore you and your body, making sure that no one touches you but your athletic tomboyish girlfriend. Someone to keep you warm and protective at all cost. “So are you.” Sevika haves you a wink. Things gotten a bit more awkward but passionate in silence when you two look one another. Even Sevika was mostly focusing on your lips. You both were trying to figure out what else to say. Then the thought came up. “Since I got kicked out, when will you next game be so I can come by and… watch you play.” You say tilting your head at her. “Our next match is in two days,” says Sevika. “I’ll buy your ticket once you show up. Your used coach can’t take away from what your doing for me. Do not worry.” Sevika says handing her phone number. “Call me when you get the chance.” She put her helmet back on, biting on her mouth guard and rush on the field, hanging out with the boys. Can’t believe she GAVE YOU HER NUMBER!? OH MY GOSH!!! (So extra😅) You just stood there like a mechanic doll wanted to freaking scream.

Friday Night (6pm)

The night the game finally begun. You bought some snacks of popcorn and nacho cheese to make things more entertaining and eyeing on Sevika the entire game. It’s like you were touched by her heart, it wouldn’t go away. The bleachers were packed by overcrowded people and you making the way towards the middle almost close to where the cheerleader team was. You had a good looking view of the football field which excites you. Two of the opposite team showed up on the field as the crowd goes wild. You clap your hands not ready to stand up and shout as in a way of embarrassment. Luckily, Sevika turn her back to see you popping your head with a light grey sweater on you. She waved at you, pleasing her cute cheerleader (you) and got on her knees to do few exercise before heading down towards her team.

When the game started, you enjoyed yourself eating the snacks you had. And your coach had to freaking show up during the game. “What are you doing here? I kicked you out of practice.” You turn to look at him wanting him to get crushed by Sevika. “Cheering for someone actually.” You tried to act all popular LMAO The coach rolling his eyes. “On who-“ “None of your damn business. XD” But then he could tell who were you even focusing on which is Sevika, one of the football team as she was ready to throw the ball for someone to get. “I see…couldn’t kept your mouth shut because of some wannabe girl keeping you off of practice just to see her play. Unbelievable.” You was NOT having this ruined your time. Your eyes betrayed him saying that which kinda snap you out. “Look sir, if you want to go and chit chat all you want, go talk to someone else but not me. I’m having the greatest time of my life actually. Am so happy I got kicked out. You won’t have to bother me anyway.” Sticking your tongue out, you walk to the next bleachers feeling proud of being brave to yourself.

Few moments of game, Sevika won a goal which got you on your feet shouting. “WHOOO! GO SEVIKA! YEEEAH!” People were startled from your excitement which made you had a nervous chuckle. “My bad y’all.” After the game was over, the black and red team won. Sevika and others had each trophy and medal. Your snacks was already spilled not even paying attention. Some of the students ran towards the team happy and hugging one another. Also Sevika was getting hugged to. You ran out the bleachers as well jumping on top of her. It surprised Sevika seeing you on top as she tries carrying her trophy on her mechanic hand. “Thanks y/n. You cheered for me so well.”

And like that she went for a kiss on the lips without anyone even bother to see the moment. You kissed her back, pulling up her face not wanting to let her go. “Come over to my dorm as a reward. We can continue this~” You nod. “Of course babe.” Sevika chuckles, waving goodbye at her team and eventually carried you to her dorm for an intimidating night.

| Yes! I was able to keep on writing in each paragraph LONGER because it was pretty much a lot to write and thankfully I was able to do more and not just a short one. If you have any request of Sevika, Grayson, Kuvira or even Mizu from blue eye samuari (I’m a simp for her as well), dm are open or the comment section. |

[animebw]

I’m gonna be honest, I thought going into Winter 2023 that this was gonna be a bit of a dump season. One of those seasons where anime just kinda sits around farting and we all wait patiently for the actual Good Shit to start coming out again while pretending to catch up on our backlogs.

That... has not been the case.

Bofuri Season 2: Seriously, how does this show get so many incredible action cuts?

Buddy Daddies: Look, it’s probably not gonna be gay, but Spy x Family meets Tiger and Bunny is something we all need in our lives, okay?

Campfire Cooking in Another World: Couldn’t even last a full episode of this one before my eyes glazed over. Dropped.

Endo and Kobayashi Live: Now this is pretty charming! Pity the animation’s such garbage, though.

Giant Beasts of Ars: It’s a damn good season for fantasy anime, y’all.

Handyman Saitou in Another World: Could actually end up a halfway decent isekai SOL if it stops being so goddamn terrible at structure.

High Card: This is exactly my brand of Anime Bullshit(tm) and I am so on board.

Ippon Again: An actually great female-led sports anime? With major A Place Further Than the Universe vibes? Do not sleep on this one, y’all.

Kaina of the Great Snow Sea: Damn. Good. Season. For. Fantasy. Anime.

Kubo Won’t Let Me Be Invisible: As far as Takagi-san knock-offs go, this one is pleasant enough.

The Magical Revolution of the Oh Fuck It These LN Titles are Impossible to Remember Just Call it “MagiRevo”: Buckle up, folks, we might just have another Actually Good Isekai on our hands.

Malevolent Spirits Mononogatari: It’s Noragami but shit. Dropped at 1 episode.

Nagatoro-san Season 2: Yeah, turns out I’m still not above the occasional well made trash.

Nier Automata: Genuine question, is this gonna be an acceptable substitute for the game or will I just be spoiling the experience for myself?

Onimai: I fucking hate the Mushoku Tensei studio so much and I hate myself even more for deciding to stick with this one.

Reborn to Master the Blade: This one might be soon for the chopping block, but I’m holding out hope that its story can overcome its middling production values. We’ll have to wait and see.

Revenger: GEN UROBUCHI’S BACK BABY YEEEEEEHAW

Sugar Apple Fairy Tale: Take notes, Every Isekai: this is how you explore slavery in a fantasy setting.

The Tale of Outcasts: Feels like a 13-year-old’sedgy  Ancient Magus Bride fanfiction. Honestly, though? I kind of really dig it.

Tomo-Chan is a Girl: LET. TOMBOYS. BE. TOMBOYS. WITHOUT. SHAMING. THEM. FOR. IT. Dropped at episode 2.

Tokyo Revengers Season 2: At this point, I’m just watching out of morbid curiosity of how bad the manga’s ending supposedly was.

Trails of Cold Steel: The Northern War: Easily the weakest fantasy anime of the lot. Giving it one more episode to impress me, otherwise it gets the drop.

Trigun Stampede: Y’all are buggin, the CG here is incredible.

Tsurune Season 2: Good god, the glow-up from season one is nuts. KyoAni just does not miss.

Vinland Saga Season 2: Okay, manga readers, let’s see if watching a bunch of sad men farm is as incredible as you say.

[amourdivine]

𝐀 𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐅𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐃.

Hello, my loves. I hope you're all doing wonderfully well. Although this pick a card was not the #1 winner in my most recent poll, I know that many people here are excited to build a family, so I decided to provide something fun for you! I hope you enjoy it & please don’t forget to provide feedback, if you will; If you liked this reading, please consider booking a paid reading or tipping me at @ amourdivinetarot@gmail.com! xo. ♡

how to choose your pile.  take deep breaths for a few minutes & look at each and every one of the piles separately. which pile sparks a feeling inside you? which pile gives you a strong memory or calls out to you the most? take your time and feel free to come back to it later.

♡ ♡ ♡ personal readings are available. click here to know more!

♡ ♡ ♡     pick a card masterlist & information.

disclaimer. none of the images are mine unless stated otherwise! this is a general reading for entertainment purposes. tarot is a divination tool & is not a substitute for medical and professional advice, nor is it meant to be taken as such. i do not take responsibility for any choice(s) made by you or others regarding my readings. please remember you are responsible for life and in power of it.

amourdivine. 2021 - 2023 © do not copy, redistribute or edit my content.

𝑷𝑰𝑳𝑬 𝑶𝑵𝑬.

strength | the star | king of wands

Hello, pile one! I’m not sure if it’s just my mind, but I keep seeing a lot of colors for this pile, especially primary colors, so it’s possible that you might have this child with an LGBTQ+ person and/or be LGBTQ+ yourself! I also saw a lot of crayons even before shuffling, so I think your kid will definitely be a very artistic type. A lot of messages came through even before I shuffled, so I think this kid is absolutely ecstatic about being a part of your family as your child.

This child is going to be very, very feisty and funny. They might be a bit of a tomboy or just a bit “rough” around the edges, but they’ll be very protective over you and their family as well. You could be a parent twice or more, so I don’t think this will be your only child, but definitely the eldest. Also, if you decide to have any pets at the time, they’ll probably want to do and know everything. Your future child’s asking you not to get frustrated when they ask you a bunch of questions about the world, pile one. They really wanted to get that across before moving on with the other messages, because they might be the type of super sensitive and feisty kid - very in touch with their emotions and they easily get hurt by words, but they have a very big and forgiving nature. Also, they’re asking you not to be overprotective, since they’re your first child, they want you to give them independence and autonomy slowly. Remember what I said about the pet? Yeah, they want to learn how to do things and they’ll watch you a lot in secret. Perhaps you’ll be up one morning and when you’re about to feed the cat, you’ve noticed that your kid’s already pouring the food onto the cat’s bowl. That’s adorable!

Something here tells me they might have fights and I can see a kid pushing another off the playground, but your kid will not start them per se. They seem very short-tempered and I can almost hear a little voice in my head going “they started it!” because your child might be very protective over others, especially animals. Also, right off the bat, they’re apologizing for coloring the walls with crayons? Not sure if that’ll resonate for all of you, but if it does, please come back to let me know! 

Also, if your child’s a little boy, your second child will be a little girl or vice versa. I can picture a little boy looking after a little girl in these cards, almost like one of them is playing and the other one’s making sure they don’t stray too far. I can’t say much about the other children, but this child will be your first and I doubt it’ll be the only! They’re so giggly, they might love it when you do a funny face or style their hair in a unique way. Also, this kid might be a bit eccentric like the artist they are - they could draw little monsters everywhere and love playing with makeup or looks regardless of their gender. They’ll brighten up your world and love you unconditionally, pile one. By the way, I had a lot of trouble spelling the words and since I’m channeling your future child’s message, I think they’ll ramble a lot and possibly mix up words at first. They’re really asking me to emphasize how loved you’ll be, in a way you have never ever felt before. This child is also urging me to tell you to take care of yourself physically and emotionally, but they also want you to promise that you’ll stay safe for them. They really love you so much, pile one. If you liked this reading, please consider booking a paid reading or tipping me at @ amourdivinetarot@gmail.com! xo. ♡

additional messages & signs: 333, pluto, leo and aquarius season, august, collecting beach shells, ginger or light blonde hair, freckles, tooth fairy, book quotes, “you can be a fighter”, “tell me everything”, “who did this to you?”, chocolate chip cookies, rainbows, lgbt parade.

𝑷𝑰𝑳𝑬 𝑻𝑾𝑶.

the fool | ace of swords | king of cups

Hello, pile two and welcome to your reading! While shuffling, I saw many cards related to Leo and other fire signs, but mostly Leo. I also heard “single parent,” so it’s possible you may raise this child on your own or become a single parent yourself. I love the freshness and boldness of this child. They may be a bit reckless and, well, foolish, since we have The Fool card here! But on a more in-depth interpretation, they seem unafraid and a bit of an airhead as well. They’re a bit brash and blunt with their words - may occasionally embarrass you in public, but all is done in good faith. They’re extremely pure and good-hearted, so it may surprise you that they’ll never grow out of that typical “naiveté” of a child’s, even well into their adult years.

This child may be born during the months of August or October, given the Leo and Libra signs I’ve gotten here. Although naive, they hold a lot of emotional wisdom and depth to them. They may be overlooked during their childhood years at school, perhaps their more extroverted and youthful nature can get them in trouble and make people underestimate or misunderstand them. However, they’re not a natural troublemaker or mischievous by any means. They’re quite witty and may have a knack for sarcasm or wordplay. Also, this kid looks like they’d be easily lost into books and works of fantasy. They have a wild imagination and it’s something they’re asking you to protect and cherish. This pile reminds me a little of pile number one, but with more maturity to them and emotional depth to them.

Despite looking like an airhead, they may actually be quite observant to the things other people don’t pay attention to. They may forget to do homework or the occasional house chores, but this child will be extremely emotionally sensitive - they may be the first to notice when one of their peers isn’t doing well or may use humor to lift other people’s mood, but this child may struggle with insecurity or confidence, deep down. They may feel they need to overperform in order to be cherished and loved, so they’re asking you to use plenty of words of affirmation to remind them how good they already are.

This child may have a bit of a dramatic flair to them as well, but like I mentioned earlier, it’s all in good nature. Do not joke about their feelings, though! Under this whimsical and dramatic nature, they take emotions very seriously. It’s quite an interesting juxtaposition - hence why I also feel that they may be misunderstood or taken for granted by their peers, at times. They may be neurodivergent and so, it’s important you check in on them. If this child is autistic, for example, allow them to take pride in these traits that make them different and unique. Also, you’ll learn a lot about the world through this child’s eyes. They have a very unique way of perceiving things. If you liked this reading, please consider booking a paid reading or tipping me at @ amourdivinetarot@gmail.com! xo. ♡

additional messages & signs: leo or sagittarius, pisces, scorpio, september, october, twitch streamer, video games, “you were born to stand out”, neurodivergent, adhd, autistic, fair, blunt, sensitive, quirky, lego house, marvel movies.

𝑷𝑰𝑳𝑬 𝑻𝑯𝑹𝑬𝑬.

seven of pentacles | knight of swords | eight of pentacles

Hello, pile number three! Welcome to your reading! Honestly, I had a little bit of a tough time shuffling for this pile, just because the messages and the overall feeling of it was so intense. They seem quite introverted and hardworking, like an old soul in a young body. It’s quite different from my previous piles, since this child holds a lot of seriousness and introversion to them, which is not actually a bad thing - they’re devoted to making you a proud parent.

They may tend to take things very seriously and to heart, however. Whatever you say to your child, they’ll take it to heart, so be careful with your words around them - it seems it can go either way. I get a bit of “middle sibling” energy from this, so they may tend to overwork themselves in order to gain people’s approval or excel in their studies to gain a sense of control. It reminds me a bit of Saturn and Capricorn as their overall concepts.

It breaks my heart a little because this child seems quite guarded. They may have a hard time opening up or simply feel that you’re too busy for them. Their main love language seems to be quality time and acts of service, so it’s important you take plenty of interest in their hobbies - no matter how “weird” or “quirky” they may seem to you, this child is very booksmart, even though sometimes they may come off as a “know it all,” they want to become resourceful and helpful, someone that you’re proud of in the long run. Aw, my heart.

Now, they may also be extremely competitive. I think they may partake in several extracurricular activities at school and become some kind of valedictorian during college. They’re reliable, trustworthy and quite solid. Although may be a bit of a wallflower as well, so be mindful when you engage with your kid, since they need their own time and may struggle with placing boundaries. This child is asking you to remind them that you’re the parent - not them, and they don’t need to have it all together. So no matter how many times they struggle with their perfectionism, it’s important you bring them back to their qualities and how worthy they are of everything.

They may also be naturally strict with themselves and have extremely high standards. They may get this from you, as well, if they witness you being harsh on yourself, they may become adept of this behavior since this child idolizes you a lot and may have troubles with their own self-image or self-worth outside of their achievements. Please remind them to have fun, a lot of it! Not everything has to be a task or a side hustle, and this message seems to apply to you as well. They acknowledge you’ve worked hard to build financial stability for them, but remember to bond emotionally with others and not pass these false beliefs onto your loved ones. Honestly, they’re a little bit of a “mini adult”, it reminds me a lot of the child character played by Dakota Fanning in “Uptown Girls,” especially the scenes in which she struggles with vulnerability and receiving affection. This is a very responsible kid, it warms my heart to know how much motivation they’ve got to succeed in life and to make you proud. They adore you so much. If you liked this reading, please consider booking a paid reading or tipping me at @ amourdivinetarot@gmail.com! xo. ♡

additional messages & signs: “why don’t you do something for yourself?”, capricorn, virgo, taurus, horseback riding, harvard, straight A’s, INTJ, ISTJ, good enough by lifehouse, “and now that you don’t have to be perfect, you can be good”, you’re on your own kid by taylor swift, "fear of being average"

amourdivine. 2021 - 2023 © do not copy, redistribute or edit my content.