#i would be less stressed if the bank hadn't claimed fraud yesterday and cancelled my card on me and said fraud charge hadnt gone thru
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#so tired of being poor and feeling guilty about spending money and living pay check to paycheck and not even that#and the holidays losing their magic solely because capitalism's boot is crushing my heart and hands so much#i know gifting is meant to be based on emotions and sentiment and im trying to focus on that but im also struggling with it#because i grew up poor and my parents made a big deal about gifts and IOUs when we couldn't afford things#and none of it was ever bad it never left me feeling unloved but the expectation of having to have gifts in the plural#and them being good gifts you spent money on has always been an impossible idea to shake for some reason#i would be less stressed if the bank hadn't claimed fraud yesterday and cancelled my card on me and said fraud charge hadnt gone thru#because now im waiting for nearly 200$ to be refunded and who knows when that'll happen
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