#i try not to let myself think about this stuff because it really really hurts and makes me feel very negative things but
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how do you cope with just about any of the hate/controversy/whatever? if anyone is overly critical of my work i get really self-conscious.
Sometimes it does affect me when it’s a personal attack because I’m a bit sensitive and I can’t help myself haha. It’s actually something I’ve been working on improving, particularly ignoring hate, it’s just… yall know how crazy the hate I get is 😂. At one point I had a bunch of random furries harass me for two days straight because they were mad at me setting boundaries with another follower, and that was RIGHT AFTER I dealt with someone accusing me of drawing vile art simply because they didn’t think I drew fat people (even though I did).
It’s easy to forget that a lot of people online are just hostile and bitter and in a constant state of hyper-aggression. Twitter especially rewards abusive behaviors online. It’s why I generally avoid fandoms nowadays and just kind of enjoy things from the sidelines. A lot of people enjoy being very cruel and unfriendly unprovoked, but I won’t say “get over it” because stuff like that DOES hurt. I’ve been told and sent a lot of stuff that still sticks with me years later, things I’ve never discussed before because it’s too upsetting.
But at the end of the day, I’m here. I’m me. And I’m awesome :)
There’s seriously no harm in discussing these things with people in your lives (I’m mainly referring to those offline) because they can be so grounding for you. I owe a lot to my family for always being there for me when I needed support.
And with art… admittedly, I’ve struggled with certain aspects of my work because of how people respond to it (a while back I vented about my frustration about having my drawings labeled “Gooner art” because god forbid when women)
But I then think “hey. This is something im proud of and I worked my ass off to get there. If someone wants to be a dick about my work, that’s their problem”. Of course well intended criticism is appreciated too and I actually don’t take personal offense to it because it HAS improved my art. I had followers criticize how I drew hands, mouths and used colors and I think I’ve improved exponentially because of that. It’s why I’m a big supporter of healthy criticism.
But again, you don’t have to listen to everyone. Criticism doesn’t mean someone is correct, trust your own thoughts and feelings above theirs, because I know the worst thing an artist can do is to try to bend their art to make it appeal to everyone, and it’ll end up appealing to no one.
I love quoting that dril tweet a lot but sometimes you just gotta say “who cares. Pick up football”. Log off and continue doing what you love, and don’t let people drag you down.
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i had the idea that stan had been regressing even before being kicked out to cope with fillbrick - could you write a fic expanding on it? (im dyslexic my ass CANNOT do it myself 😭) like teenage stan regressing and ford taking care of him ykwim
Ooo I’ve never thought about a teen stan regressing. Thank you for the ask! Please let me know if it lives up to your expectations! TW for implied child abuse
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Stan sniffled, pulling his blanket tighter around his head. His head started started feeling fuzzy again after another fight with Filbrick. He thinks there’s something wrong with him, maybe all the fights he’s gotten into has messed up his head or something. When he gets all fuzzy headed like this, he finds it really hard to talk, and he’s not interested in any of that teenage stuff. He just wants to hold on to this cheap stuffed monkey he won from the fair a few years ago. Sometimes he has the urge to make sand castles, but he can’t bear the thought of someone seeing him like that outside of his room; his sanctuary where no body comes in. Nobody but Ford, that is. Ford’s the only one who knows about this thing that happens to Stan sometimes. He found his clutching his monkey and sobbing one day, and while Stan couldn’t explain what happened until after he stopped feeling fuzzy, Ford just sat with him until he felt better. He’s such a good brother. But Ford doesn’t know what this is either, why Stan goes fuzzy headed sometimes. Maybe he’s just a stupid freak-
“Stanley?” He flinches as he hears Ford’s voice, he didn’t hear the door open. He must be really out of it. Stan doesn’t come out from under his blanket, curling up tighter when he hears Ford walk over to his bunk.
“Stanley, are you alright? I heard you had another fight with dad. What happened this time-“ He doesn’t fight it as Ford pulls the blanket off his head, but he hides his face in the sheets when Ford stops mid-sentence. He’s going to be mad, isn’t he. Mad at Stan for being stupid and crying over nothing. He pulls away when his brother goes to touch his face, it hurts and he doesn’t want anybody touching it.
“Wh-what? Did dad…? Stanley, I-“ If Stan wasn’t feeling so bad, he might’ve giggled. He’s never heard his brother, who knows like a billion words, to be so speechless. But he doesn’t feel like laughing, his mouth is quivering because he’s trying to hold back his tears. He’s a man, not a big baby, and men don’t cry. No matter if he is feeling like a big baby sometimes, like right now. Stan clenches his eyes shut as Ford gets up from his bed with a sigh. He knew it. Ford’s mad at him, too. Mad at Stan for being a big baby who couldn’t dodge a simple right hook.
Ford comes back though, he comes back holding the cheap purple monkey Stan had named “Mookie”, a stupid name but he couldn’t think of anything else. He reaches out, needing to hold on to his Monkey toy and get comfort from it. “Here you go, Stanley, here’s your Mookie,” Stan still blushes whenever Ford speaks to him in that soft voice and uses his toys name, “scoot over. I’m getting in your bed with you. I need some Stanley time.” His brother explains when Stan looks at his, wondering why he didn’t want to go to his own bed with his own stiff sheets. Stan’s not going to argue against cuddling with Ford, that’s his favorite thing to do.
Stan sighs against Ford, snuggling his face into his chest and resisting the urge to chew on his shirt; he didn’t think Ford would appreciate that. He does wipe his remaining tears off on it, though. He feels Ford’s answering sigh ruffle his hair, his arms wrapping tight around Stan. He likes the pressure and warmth of Ford’s arms, he gets cold easily. Ford kisses his head before he starts talking. Stan doesn’t know what he’s talking about, probably wouldn’t even if he were right in the head, he thinks it’s about some research into a math problem. He doesn’t know, he just likes listening to Ford talk, it soothes him.
He still finches when Ford brushes his hand against his cheek, but he’s not as scared of Ford’s reaction anymore, it was silly of him to think Ford would be mad about this, not when he’s always had Stan’s back! He’s the best big brother Stan could ever ask for. He’ll tell Ford that when he’s feeling better. He just content to lay here with his and listen to his voice. He hopes he’ll always have Ford there with him.
#gravity falls#gravity falls agere#age regression#stanley pines#sfw agere#fandom agere#stanford pines#gravity falls headcanons#gravity falls stanley#gravity falls stanford#agere drabble#gravity falls age regression#gravity falls stan pines#ford pines headcanons#teen ford#teen stan#fandom age regression#age regression Drabble#fandom drabble#gravity falls ford pines#gravity falls ford#gravity falls stan
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Rio's Favorite Person
“What if I stopped killing witches?”
“Are you going to?”
“No, of course not. But pretend. What if?”
“All right, I’m pretending. …I would be sad?"
“Is that all?”
“Probably more, um. Excitable?”
“…Not really what I meant, but good to know. Also, terrifying.”
“Agatha, are you asking if I’m only in love with you because you kill people?”
“Well. I assume it is a big part of the appeal—“
“Heh. I do like when you are insecure, beloved, it’s cute. Agatha Harkness, you are mine and I am yours, for all eternity. Nothing changes that.”
“Wow. Somehow both condescending and creepy. You really wouldn’t mind?”
“I would mind. I would be sad. I would sulk. I would do so right here, next to you, where I belong.”
“…You’re really overdoing it today.”
“I was trying for reassuring?”
“Who said I was even worried.”
“Agatha, do you know you are my favorite person in the world?”
“But why?”
“I was just asking myself the same question.”
“…”
“There, beloved! You do have feelings after all.”
“…mm.”
“…Agatha?”
“Hmm?”
“…Don’t get upset.”
“It’s fine.”
“Agatha, I didn’t mean that. I was only trying to—“
“Hurt my feelings? I know.”
“…You do it to me.”
“I do. You deserve to get some of your own back.”
“…I…I’m sorry, all right?”
“Hah! I knew you couldn’t hold out!”
"…”
“Goddess, you're terrible at—okay, okay, let's calm down, there's no need for this many vines.”
“That remains to be seen. Say something nice, Ags. Quickly."
"Right. …You know all that stuff you said before, about me not having to kill people? I…um. It was…I liked it. Really.”
"…You said it was condescending and creepy."
"It was. But it was also reassuring."
"Oh. …cute…"
"…I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that last part, okay?"
"I do mean it, you know. But…"
"Also don't stop killing people?"
"…It is very nice."
"Anything for you, my sweet."
"And for your own pursuit of power, of course."
"Of course. I am fundamentally selfish and unfeeling, after all."
"…I didn't say that."
"Today."
"Come here, beloved."
"Wait, why? Why vines?! I thought we were past vines!"
"Because you're going to try to get away if I tell you all the reasons you're wonderful. This way, you can't escape."
"You really, really, really don't have to do that."
"I do. I hurt your feelings. I want to make it up to you."
"No, no, you didn't, I promise I was only being manipulative, I swear!"
"You are a beautiful once-in-a-generation witch..."
Sometime much, much later
"…Fine. You win this one."
"I wasn't aware we were competing?"
"I mean, I won't pretend my feelings are hurt again."
"Heh. Pretend."
"...you really do spend a lot of time thinking about me, huh?"
"Yes, Agatha. I really do."
"Creepy. ...Don't stop, though."
"No, beloved. Never."
#agatha all along#agatha x rio#agathario#Rio is number 1 Agatha fan#She expresses things in her own way though#Idk about the title here
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so there's this post floating around about like, feeling like an outsider even in a group of outsiders and i almost reblogged it being like
'aha i do that'
except. like. i know exactly why that happens, and its 100% my fault
i just have trouble maintaining relationships because i'm a poor communicator. that's been the case since high school. i dont really initiate conversations or remember to text or call people. its not from a place of indifference or anything like that - i'm sincerely an 'out of sight out of mind' kind of person.
i can not talk to and not see someone for months or years but my feelings for them don't change. it doesn't bother me if people dont check in on me or don't hang out with me or don't text me. i still like them. unfortunately that is not how 99% of the population communicates. people (rightfully) assume that when someone doesn't initiate conversation or hang-outs or doesn't check in on you, that they don't care about you. for me, thats not the case at all. like if i like you and consider you my friend, you are ALWAYS my friend. i would do anything for you and would be more than happy to talk/see each other/support you/etc. its just the day-to-day communication that i really struggle with. but thats how most relationships form - regular, consistent communication.
i've gone through periods of extreme guilt for this where i sincerely try, and make new friends, and re-connect with texting and phone calls and hanging out more often but inevitably something happens, i get busy or i forget and suddenly all this time passes and people think i dont care anymore. unfortunately that's not the case whatsoever - time is kind of abstract to me and i dont understand that while my feelings don't change, others feel more distant or abandoned.
and i've really hurt people in my life like that. friends that i've known for many years from high school/college are a LITTLE more forgiving because they know i'm just 'like that' but still. it does hurt people. like i haven't spoken to my dad in probably at least a year - not because i dont love him, but because of that same reason. he doesn't reach out and i forget and it just steamrolls because he gets hurt, doesn't reach out because he thinks i'm intentionally 'ignoring' him, and i continue to forget, and its just this viscous cycle. i haven't talked to my grandparents in months. my mom knows better and texts me every week or so, but it still hurts her that she has to reach out so regularly. she also plays these games where she sees how 'long' it takes for me to remember to reach out. a lot of people in my life have done that. its like i'm being tested on something without ever being told its a standard test, ya know? i'm always destined to fail it because i dont know how long is too long. at which point will the time and distance be unacceptable? i still dont know the answer.
and i think it makes me come off as a really heartless and callous person. its made me kind of keep people at arms-length because i know i'm not capable of being a part of most people's lives. i have perfectly normal and pleasant relationships with my coworkers and all that, but i'm generally not close with them. and i can see the confusion, because we hang out and i'm pretty normal or whatever and we have fun and then they don't hear from me for months and they're like 'uhhhh.... okay? so i guess you don't like me?'
i do. i just have different relationship maintenance standards than others i guess. so i just overall avoid being around others just because i know i'll disappoint them. it is what it is but it really is sad, in a way.
#i've been meaning to write this out for a while.... hmmm#personal#it really bothers me that i'm like this#and i've tried to change and fix it but again inevitably i go back to how i've always been and it only hurts people more#i'm an outsider because i choose to make myself that way#obviously also i'm very very forgetful (...which now i know is probably an adhd thing)#so like people say its not because i dont remember WHEN your birthday is#i just didn't realize thats the day it was.#it makes me seem really callous and uncaring#which is kinda a bummer#but. i am what i am. its been like this for 15+ years and i dont think its going to change#its just... i used to be really normal about stuff like that. loved talking with my friends on the phone every night#and hanging out and inviting people to things. it was effortless. something changed for me in high school and like... i never got that back#and i'm fine with being a casual acquaintance with people forever#i just dont want to let anyone down or make them feel unloved#sometimes i think thats why i love writing and ao3 so much#you're communicating parts of yourselves and your thoughts and feelings#and you form a connection with others without the standard regular convos#just reading each other's works and supporting each other and enjoying little snippets of their lives#but also.... i AM too freaky for the normies#and too normie for the freaks#i'm kind of a nothing person tbh#there will never be a 'community' for me because i'm not capable of being part of a 'community'#thats my fault. and its ok.#i do feel a little jealous. my partner has his friend groups and just randomly calls people or texts people and like... just does that#i dont get it. i dont know how to do that. even when i try i fail miserably.#what low social intelligence does to a mf ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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I cared. I still do. I still think of you and I still cry over you. You were importat to me. You still are.
#I was interested. I wanted to get to know you.#I did not want validation. I only said it because you said it... I don't know why. I was susceptible.#I was blindly accepting certain things that you said about me. Judgement that you had for me.#I was under severe stress from my job at the time; while at the same time dealing with unresolved emotional trauma and very low self worth.#vent#I was burnt out. Crushed... Completely.#I didn't want attention. I did not want you to cure my depression. I though I was just letting you know me. I wasn't aware I was oversharin#I tried... SO HARD to get over the things that triggered me and hurt me but I just couldn't...#I wanted to. I did everything in my might; I took it to therapy; I looked everywhere within me; to either get over it#or completely forget about you and stop caring at all; so things were ok and normal again; but it didn't go away...#I just feel so... unsafe... at the idea of talking again#I know I wasn't the best listener and I profoundly regret that.#I was not only thinking about myself like you said and I was aware of the effort that other's put; but I was afraid/resistant to PRECISELY#that cause of past events with other people. Because in some I was the one putting that effort and ended badly for me. Looking back#that was inappropiate of you because you felt too comfortable generalizing my past relationships and why in your head they failed.#“I cant help but feel you are looking down on people who” Stay away from me if you ever make a stretch like this again.#By “experiment” I meant that you don't know how a relatioship with somebody is gonna turn out until you go and try. That's all I meant.#I didn't want things to turn out this way. I'm sorry they did.#The effort I put for you may have been shit to you. But to me it was a lot. And I'm done taking judgement.#Altho I love my friends I still keep distance. I still can't completely help that. I can go months not talking to my BF.#You were my BF during my teenage years. I remembered you fondly. I still do.#I don't feel ready to talk again having to keep to myself interest that I might have. Related to trauma. I do not feel comfortable with tha#No I do not look at your blogs.#The day I said I was abused I had a panic attack right after that. That's mainly why I had to cut contact: I didn't want another one.#I didn't tell you because I didn't trust you to not say “talk to the void” again. I didn't trust you to want to hear about it. I didnt feel#safe with you anymore. Event tho we ressumed contact I felt that way the entire time.#I wanted to answer all the questions you had; I really did; until I couldn't stand it anymore.#And the day I removed you from discord... I know you probably had an awful day that day... I'm so; so sorry...#I'd like to one day be completely unbothered by assumptions and stuff cuz I know it's not your fault... You went through stuff too...#stuff
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im bitter im very very bitter but j think today i will allow myself feel like this instead of pretending i dont. we can stop repressing everything for a bit. as a treat.
#neg post im sorry i only come back to scream into the tumblr void#im just. so. bitter#alone and pathetic#and i spent the whole drive home chanting not to kill myself bexause i didnt want to go home and continue bejng alone like i am every other#miserable day of the year but especially today.#but alas#i wish people would actually want to do things with ME. instead of it constantly being the other way around and then either getting#cancelled on or forgotten about or just flat out denied#i try not to let myself think about this stuff because it really really hurts and makes me feel very negative things but#todays my birthday and its ALWAYS a bad day and its been especially horrible this year so im allowing myself this one little thing
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kinda really sucks that i've been made to feel so obnoxious and wrong that i just can't really talk about anything myself unless i'm asked something
#but hey that's what happens when everything you've done that felt safe and ok#kinda never was and you were told you only talk of 1 thing and don't care about anything else#but then now i'm told i'm apparently missed and it's missed when i used to talk freely about stuff#and i can't believe that. even if i try my hardest to#i know i can't do that and i know if i let go of my constraints and talk with no restrictions i'll be told off again#and if not then i won't be told it's not ok and i won't be told it's too much#and i'll be doing harm without realizing it#but that's what i deserve for not putting others before myself#i guess. sort of. went back to knowing that whatever i want or feel doesn't matter#so that's fine i suppose. i can still live and move on sort of#so. it's whatever. i'll be asked and i'll be talked to if i'm wanted or needed#whatever it is i do out of my own initiative or interest won't be welcome and that's ok too#as long as i keep finding happiness myself in something then. ok#kinda sucks to be hurt deeply and then blamed for reacting a certain way too#being told 'i'm hurt now' kinda fucking sucks. because i never wanted this to begin with#all i did was. feeling safe and talking a lot. but that was of course not ok#and god knows how not ok that had been. for how much time. and i wasn't told#now it's become extremely sensitive and i require 100% transparency on whatever happens or i feel insanely bad#like my chest just gives up. and i'm capable of being made guilty even when i'm honest about this too#so i think i'm kind of tired and i really don't know what else to do. and i don't feel like talking#but i'm still here. and i realize i don't feel anger or hatred or anything like it. there's just. kinda nothing#but if i'm asked or talked to i feel good and i feel ok#but because of my hurt i've become less reliable on that and i'm not believed when i say i still treasure it a lot#and despite being hurt i don't want to be isolated. it's just that i can't trust again#but oh well right. i apparently caused all this and caused my personality to completely change#so it's all on me i suppose
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day ??? of promising to write smth for fun and failing to follow through 😔 didn’t even read anything. I feel like my brain has been all over the place lately… technically it’s fine because I’ve just been watching historical documentaries, political interviews, good and informative video essays, and reading news articles. but it’s like… one minute I decide to read patriots traitors and empires but immediately after that I’m already downloading red star over china. and I literally just uploaded chelsea manning’s memoir to my ereader. never felt more whelmed by info in my life. it’s good though it’s a happy problem but it’s still frustrating too because my headaches are back and my sleep quality has been shit for 4 weeks now 😔😔😔😔😔😔😔 rip. I’m also itching to watch naruto unfortunately. I also wanna go back to studying mandarin. So many stuff I wanna do… cursed to have a body that’s tired by 1PM no matter how active I am lmao
#I’ve also been slowly looking into marketing and I’m gonna get a certificate or wtv#because I still have to upskill and stuff if I really am serious about distancing myself from hr#but that’s the least interesting thing abt my life rn#marketing doesn’t seem unbearable to me though. so far. sometimes I fancy using the stuff I learned for my local org if they let me in agai#in the future. because I think abt the NPA a lot and my heart breaks for them every time and I want to help out in any way I can#anyway my head hurts I’m gonna try to sleep 🫡 I just needed to ramble for a bit
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Sex Ed Time
ok I'm gonna tell you about some things that might happen if you are transitioning m->f. this is not a comprehensive list just my own experience, be sure to do your own research I just really wanted to voice how this affects me because I think open discussion about this type of stuff is just more helpful for everyone rather than keeping it private
BOOBS HURT WHEN THEY GROW
your sex drive (libido) will probably go down a lot
facial hair is very hard to get rid of
my go-to gender affirming clothing is high-waisted jeans. I suggest going to a goodwill or some sort of cheap store that lets you try on clothes to figure out what you like
muscle mass will go down, fat will be redistributed
boobs do all sorts of crazy stuff when you run / exercise
overtime your skin will get softer, you also might smell nicer, and I've been told it can thin body hair but I don't really see it all that much 🤷
your brain chemistry can change when you reduce testosterone and increase estrogen, there are lots of factors that contribute toward any changes to your personality, but hormones can have an impact as well. for me this is a good thing because I struggle with allowing myself to feel emotions sometimes, no matter how hard I tried I was never really able to get myself to cry. I've gotten closer to being able to cry since I started transitioning though and that makes me very happy
this is a slow process that can take several years, ultimately you're going to be in your body for several years regardless, so if this is something you want it's definitely something you should try to pursue if possible. the time will pass anyways, and it does feel nice to work towards something that can make you happier.
also this is very important, you don't need to do any sort of hormone replacement therapy in order to be trans. not everybody can access HRT, and for those who can access it, not everybody wants to take on all the changes that come with treatments. you don't have to chemically or physically change your body in any way in order to deserve respect
all right that's all I have for right now feel free to add anything in the comments, I would especially like to hear from trans men what your experiences have been, I think openly talking about these types of things can really help some people
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#the way some people are just friends as long as you are of use to them but when something awful happened to you they couldnt even check in#and then you go into a big depression and arent able to have the headspace to help them with their shit#and now youre finally a little better and trying to check in but they ignore you#like ugh like i knew he uses female friends as an emotional crutch but still#its not like i had or have many friends anyway#it started with losing one friend because he [redacted] and dealing with the aftermath of that shit leading to losing [redacted]#which doesnt hurt as much anymore most of the time even outside my depression so i think it means im over it#but basically id you dont get that i wasnt doing well with all that idk what to tell you#and you can say all that you know im here and you can tell me stuff but when i actually do you ghost#lmao always knew that would happen because it happens with everyone#no one really wants me to open up#thats what sucks about losing [redacted] too because thats the closest i was to being myself with someone#sigh anyway#might delete later#lol spiralling but i told myself ill let myself deal with it instead of suppressing it so here we are
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sometimes the notes app ain't it, u have to do vent posts where no one will see it
#im just upset feeling like chopped liver bc no one cares about MY shit#but then feeling bad about feeling upset because i can be kind of a cold bitch and i care about THEIR shit but maybe they dont know it#or its not enough or something#it's just the last few times ive needed help or sympathy i havent gotten it#i never used to ask and now when im trying to speak up no one listens. and so i kinda just wonder is it me or them#do i not know how to ask right or was i really justified in not asking out of fear i would find out there wouldn't be help for me?#lets therapy it up i feel: lonely. snubbed. unwanted. hurt. angry. ashamed. like im underwhelming to everyone and unwanted even when i try#when i try to do the things that people say they want in a friend and not the things people say are offputting. am i just that unlikable?#well from a vent post im not doing myself any credits#but. i am trying. so it hurts to fail; which was the whole point of withdrawing and avoiding failure this whole time#thinking about my boss saying 'i was stressed watching you but i never have to be worried you won't succeed on your own'#or my dad dismissing my asking him to drive to me during the worst week ever because I'm physically capable of doing it myself#even though he's done it for my sister multiple times just bc she asked#about being ignored by half my family last weekend when i was barely skirting having a panic attack#about my qpp shutting me down when i wanted to vent about that. i know they have their own problems but still#about soothing my sister's meltdown the next day AND cleaning her kitchen for company AND cooking dinner for said company#with hardly an acknowledgement#about always being the fifth wheel at immediate family stuff these days when my immediate family has always been so important to me#I'm so sick of keeping my secrets and setting aside my own needs and getting quieter and more distant until i just break away unnoticed(?)#i dont want to do that anymore and I'm trying to speak up and Be A Goddamn Person who embarrassingly has human needs#but how on earth am i managing to do it wrong
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Imagine nearly beating a bitch when they imply that ex-husband Gojo was anything but completely devoted.
Being married to one of the most powerful sorcerers in history was bound to garner some rumors. But the the rumor mill really went wild after your divorce.
You'd grown to ignore the rumors that Satoru left because you were unable to have children after Sen. Or that his Clan ordered you to divorce (though they would have if they could). Or that you weren't a strong enough sorcerer to maintain his interest. People could make up all kinds of baseless things, so you grew to ignore them quickly enough.
But of all the cruel, accusatory, presumptuous rumors surrounding your divorce, one stood far above the rest.
"Satoru Gojo's wife left him because of his wandering eye."
As if people knew anything about him. About how "devotion" is the core of his personality.
So, yes, you might have sent an up-and-coming clan heir through a wall at an official meeting. But she had it coming.
Sukuna sighs and yanks you back into your seat. "Calm down. The bitch doesn't know what she's talking about."
"Excuse me?" the young heir gasped. "How dare you speak of me that way?"
You flick a hand and send a water snake directly at her face, making sure to direct it at an angle that would force water right up her sinuses. She coughs and gags.
"Satoru was utterly devoted to me and our son. Our marriage may not have lasted, but he is still the most loving man I've ever met. If I ever hear another nasty comment about him from you again, I will remove your tongue," you growl.
The other clan staff sitting around the table gape at you. No one moves to help the young heir.
"Looks like this meeting's over," Sukuna drawls, gathering his papers. "Good thing. This was such a waste of time. Come back when you actually have something for me that makes sense." He shifts into his Ryomen form and uses his extra arms to grab your stuff. "C'mon, brat. I'm done with these idiots."
~
Imagine doing a consultation at Tokyo High and being a little extra nice to ex-husband Gojo.
"I organized each file with color tabs. They're pretty self-explanatory," you explain, handing over the stack.
"And here's to think you could hardly read when we met," Satoru teases.
"Hilarious," you deadpan. "And I left a bag of sandwiches and a gallon of cut fruit for you in the employee fridge. Don't forget to eat again or I'll force feed you myself."
Satoru's eyebrows lift. "Oh. That's different. What brought this on? Are you buttering me up for something? What'd you do?"
You scoff and make to leave his office. "I just don't need Suguru to complain to me about you passing out or something. Don't think about it too hard."
"Alright, thanks."
Just before you cross the threshold, you hear, "Thank you for defending me. You didn't have to do that."
You turn halfway and eye him warily. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Kuna ratted you out."
"Of course he did."
"Nice try, though." He gives you a rare smile.
Satoru never smiled much. He laughed, pouted, or sly grinned plenty, but you hadn't seen his gentle smile in a while. It made him look younger.
"Well." You shrug. "Bitches who don't know any better should keep their mouths shut."
He laughs. "The Teenage Jailbird version of you still jumps out sometimes, I see."
"She gets the job done." You linger in the doorway for a moment. Then you move before you can change your mind.
Satoru turns his chair to face you when you run round the desk and lets out a soft "oof" when you lock him in a tight embrace. Your clench fistfuls of his uniform jacket.
"It's okay." Satoru pats your back. "I'm not hurt. Really."
You have to pry yourself from him, but you manage. Wiping a stray tear - that even Satoru is surprised to see - you nod resolutely.
"Okay, well. Don't forget to eat or whatever. Bye, Satoru."
Satoru watches you speed walk down the hall. The six eyes pick up on you stopping outside the school gates and running your hands down your face. Once you're gone, he returns to his admin work newly energized.
It was hard to explain to you when you were married, but those little moments of affirmation made all the difference to him.
~ Thanks for reading!
Click [here] to keep up with ex-husband Gojo and his estranged family | Ask stuff about Sen and the fam [here]
#jujutsu kaisen#gojo sentaro#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jjk x reader#gojo satoru x reader#jjk imagines#jujutsu kaisen x reader
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🇨 🇴 🇳 🇫 🇪 🇸 🇸 🇮 🇴 🇳 !
BSD MEN REACTING TO A CONFESSION.
↷ A/N ─ yes new divider again because im indecisive as heck
★ FT. ─ dazai , chuuya , ranpo , akutagawa , atsushi , fyodor
!! TAGS ─ mentions of suicide, insecurities, overall fluff
"i love you."
ᴅᴀᴢᴀɪ.
promptly replies with, "i love you too."
he'll lean into you with an amused smile because he lowkey thinks you're joking
when he realizes you're serious about it he'll immediately stop the stupid grin
and look at you with this sincere look you've never seen on his face before
he'll hold your hand and everything while repeating "i love you too," for a second time, only this time he's serious about it too
definitely asks for double suicide later
"You know it's my motto to unalive myself with a beautiful woman. How lucky of you to have been bestowed upon this honour."
"Mhm."
"I'll say yes if you join me in a double suicide," he asks with puppy eyes.
"Dazai, you already said yes."
"I'll say it again!"
ᴄʜᴜᴜʏᴀ.
he stops abruptly and half chokes on his expensive ass wine
poor boy is really confused 😭 because "where did that come from??"
he tries to play it cool but he's literally SCREAMING inside
we all know he's been betrayed a lot of times in the past so he feels hesitant about it
will decide to give it a shot tho
100% calls dazai to brag about it
"You may be taller or whatever (as if that matters in the first place) but were you the one able to steal her heart? Eh? I think not!"
You chuckle hearing him update his rival of his new relationship status.
"And anyway," he raises a glass of wine for toast. "I'd like to thank my good looks, good looks and did I mention my good looks (?) for making tonight the happiest night ever."
ʀᴀɴᴘᴏ.
"i know."
he has always observed every single thing about you - how you behave around others vs how you behave around him, the little times you look at him like you want his attention etc etc
he's known about this since like soooo long
he defo also knew when where and how you were gonna confess
went to yosano for tips to react to it and bought you chocolates and stuff. he thinks it'll make you happy :D
eats all of that himself even tho he originally bought it for you but you let it slide because he's a cutie patootie
"You could at least have been a bit subtle about it," he says, munching on his chips. "I mean, anyone who saw you would've been able to guess. I didn't even need my ability for this!"
He lifts his chin up thoughtfully, fingers ripping open another packet of snacks. "You should be grateful I'm not a snitch. Eh, well," he shrugs, "You're now dating the greatest detective in the world! Congratulations!"
ᴀᴋᴜᴛᴀɢᴀᴡᴀ.
"eh???"
like chuuya, he's pretty confused too
"are you sure?"
tries to keep a straight face and hide his fluster
he'll narrow his eyes at you as if he's trying to read your emotions. he doesn't wanna get hurt if he gets too attached to you and you two end up breaking up
also how tf is he supposed to believe that someone like YOU like someone like HIM?
reassure him that he's perfect please :( poor baby deserves the world
"I am a lot of work. I don't think you can keep up with all of that," he says shortly.
"I'll try my best."
"You don't have to."
"But I want to!"
He stares at you for a few moments, looking like he's about to cry.
"Oh, alright then," he waves a hand around. "But don't you ever leave me."
ᴀᴛꜱᴜꜱʜɪ.
screams
"SAY IT AGAIN PLEASE!"
jumps around everywhere in happiness
you dont even get a verbal answer the man's just dancing around
either that or he just faints
he's, like akutagawa, insecure about himself. but he's much more open to showing his emotions to you.
you end up cuddling the whole night or he calls off work to be with you for the rest of the day <3
"I..." he repeats the same word for the fifth time in a row.
"Yes?"
"Don't mind me, I'm just trying to come to terms with the fact that I get to date you."
"Is that a bad thing?"
"No, no!" he panics, wringing both hands all over himself hastily. "I love you! Really!"
ꜰʏᴏᴅᴏʀ.
no reaction. im sorry
spares a small glance at you but otherwise doesn't get distracted from his work
you think he's gone deaf from the way he just ignored you cuz what????
will spend like 15 minutes that way before extending an arm to you and you lowkey DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO??? HELP??
he'll stare at you for a few seconds before pulling you onto his lap and continuing with his work
and that's his way of saying yes
He shuts the computers around him down and taps your outer thigh twice. You immediately stand up and help him up. He stares at you for a few seconds, contemplating something.
"You know, I never thought I'd enable others to call me a lovesick fool."
"Does that mean you are a lovesick fool?"
"A little, maybe," he turns around and walks out of the door while you follow him with a soft smile on your face.
© chuulyssa 2024 - do not copy, plagiarize or repost my works on any platforms. do not translate.
#bsd x reader#bsd x y/n#bsd x you#bsd scenarios#bsd hcs#bsd headcanons#dazai hcs#dazai x y/n#dazai x reader#chuuya imagines#chuuya x reader#fyodor hcs#fyodor x you#fyodor x reader#akutagawa hcs#akutagawa x reader#chuuya headcanons#dazai headcanons#dazai x you#fyodor imagines#atsushi hcs#atsushi nakajima#atsushi x reader#dazai bsd
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Real (a little rant of mine below, i start complaining on it so just.. ignore it lmfao)
I know life is full of goodbyes and hellos and sometimes you go away from people you love and sometimes they go away from you and that’s the way things are but I just hate it. I hate saying goodbye I hate letting go. I hate missing people.
#little rant based on this#i fucking hate goodbyes#sometimes i feel like its the better thing to do though. i don't wanna make people deal with me and as much as id like to just come back#i know i need to just leave them alone and let them move on with their lives. its the right thing to do#it still hurts. it hurts a lot. its just that way#people move on. i dont know why i cant just let go. i know these same people dont care about me or even think about me late at night#but i do. its all i do. i lay awake at night thinking about what could have been if i had just stayed or i could be friends with them again#it's a cycle#just something in life you have to deal with and I know im not special when i complain about stuff like this#i hate getting attached to people and knowing that eventually im going have to move on. to just.. stop. like everyone else#nothing lasts forever and this is a known fact. i know. i just idk.#i don't know or even want to make friends anymore. i dont think i can. my mind subconsciously compares experiences#with people i used to know and people that i just dont talk to anymore#i hate goodbyes so much that it resulted in pushing majority of everybody away because i cant stand the thought of them leaving#or i cant stand thought of possibly hurting them with anything i do. so i just leave first.#and sometimes i find myself coming back when I know i should let people go. I text them. I try to make conversation but then delete it#i think im being repetitive but ive just been really unmotivated and depressed lately#i hate being lonely but im scared of making new connections with people#and im scared to try and rekindle of what i once had with other people that i used to know#because most of the time they dont really wanna rekindle something that had no flame begin with#anyways i'm rambling#idk why i even did this.#if you read this 💀 bro why
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1x04: "just kind of an asshole and a bad friend" - this scene, though!!
I don't see this scene discussed all that much, but for me it's a massive turning point, not just in the Lokius friendship but for Loki's own growth as a person who doesn't want to let down the people he respects and cares about. Mobius completely blows Loki's mind here and cuts him down with a graceful, yet blunt skill. He can almost read Loki's mind; no one has ever understood Loki like this before. But more importantly, why Mobius' reply here means so much:
He's not raising his voice. He's not giving Loki the angry and hurtful response that Loki expects and wants right now. That's because if Mobius hurts Loki back, if he retaliates in kind, it will distract Loki from the fact that he was a dick to the first real friend he ever had. It will make it much easier for Loki to lie to himself and excuse his actions, while avoiding any guilty feelings. Mobius is not going to give him that.
Mobius also refuses to play along with Loki's bratty drama, instead speaking to him in an honest way, showing that yeah, Loki did let him down and hurt his feelings. And that Mobius is angry, sure. But it's not a moment for petty, fake drama such as Loki tries to ignite.
Instead, it's his friend saying "I trusted you and put myself on the line for you and you betrayed me. You don't get to make this about anything else." (more below the break)
Owen Wilson's delivery on these lines could not have been more flawless. We get all of Mobius' feelings; he's just a regular guy at the end of the day, and his genuineness, his integrity is not what Loki is used to dealing with. He's knocked the ground out from under Loki, this simply, this easily.
Emotional stakes instead of shallow, selfish ones. Loki is thrown into real shock by this turn of events. This is not how he's used to being dealt with when he's been "bad." The child in Loki never matured past these tantrums, for reasons we can easily guess.
Instead of being enraged or saying a bunch of mean stuff back at him, Mobius calls it like it is, then moves on, as if Loki no longer deserves his attention. That is going to drive Loki so crazy.
Plus, Mobius gets Loki so completely that he already knows how his statement is going to hit him. That's why, when Loki's surprised expression appears, Mobius is expecting it and says, "Yeah, chew on that for a little bit."
In other words, "How do you like being treated like a person who is expected to be decent and considerate, as opposed to being treated like a threat or problem to be destroyed?"
I think the latter was damaging to Loki at first, but then, over time, so much easier for Loki to cope with. Enemies were playing into his hands by repeating back the same insults he's gotten used to, has toughened up to.
Nobody has believed in him and expected - not just demanded - but expected better from Loki, until Mobius.
Knowing that he almost immediately tarnished such a friendship hits completely different and Loki is thrown by it.
Mobius sees Loki 100% for who he is and knows how to get under his skin when necessary, knows how to get past Loki's bravado in a way no one else has done.
But part of that skill is because Mobius really still can't help loving Loki to bits, and as hurt as he is here, he has not completely given up on Loki. It's Mobius' genuine, heartfelt responses to Loki that allow him the empathy to give as good as he gets, but more than that, to care enough, specifically, to try and help Loki learn to be better.
I just love them so much-- 😭💓💞
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And a good executive dysfunction to you!
My stomach hurts.
I don't want to draw right now, but I really do want to draw in general. Just not now. Maybe... now?
No. Not yet.
There's a wasp's nest on the catio. I should be looking up how to remove it, but instead I'm in here writing this nonsense. I should be drawing.
It still smells like burning metal in here, so I probably am better off with the wasps. Did I mention that my bathroom caught fire this morning? Like an actual fire fire. I may have buried the lede on that one. I used to think it was "buried the lead", as though you'd skipped the information you meant to lead with. Fun that it still works.
Fire dept. said that there was a timer on the wall switch in the bathroom where we're having work done from the flood that happened after my birthday. When the timer tripped, a heating mesh coiled up by the wall caught fire. Thankfully, my fiancee' smelled the burning metal and we caught it early.
It's hard to make cartoons when your house keeps attacking you. Also, when you're not employed making cartoons. I'm trying some indie stuff, but again... can I get a break here? Let's just tone down the apocalypse. I'd like to get some stuff done. And my insurance runs out in two weeks.
But HA! Fincee'! So I still get insurance. Happy accidents. Suck it, world-- Oh hang on. Contractor is here...
I'm back! Where was I?
My fuchsia is on the rebound, I think. Passed it on the way back in. I don't want to call it a comeback, but it's flowering. I think maybe the pot retains too much water. We'll see how it goes. Thankfully it doesn't need much compost because I blew through the whole pile yesterday refiling the garden beds. I did the beds Hügelkultur style, but I used cacti in one of them, so the soil drop was insane after the first year. Free garden tip for ya' there.
Where was I?
To be fair, there's a lot of residual adrenaline going on this morning too.
Work.
Right...
Gotta get these drawings done. I said I'd do it by tomorrow. I only said it to myself, but I should maybe listen. Can I be trusted?
Just draw, dude.
It smells like cheese and apocalypse in here. Nothing I can do about the fried metal, but the cheese is from the toaster oven. I should go clean that now. Hang on. I'll be back.
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