#i should stop if i have any symptoms so still a bit nervous about that

[sharas-bae]

i can go back to the gym next week! no myocarditis or other inflammation/mechanical fuckups! (i do have a slight, apparently insignificant valve regurgitation which is inevitably concerning re: longterm despite the assurances but. i'll take it)

it's gonna be starting from basically zero compared to where i was 3 months ago but i'm just glad to be starting at all

[chukys-mouthguard]

kinda tempting pt. 5

part 4

3.6k words

featuring: mat barzal x female reader x matthew rempe

note: this is the final part of this series 🥲 i will be writing an alternative ending to come at a later date - there is the possibility of a sequel featuring just rempe 👀 if we want that?

i am not fully happy with the ending on this if I’m honest, but i wanted to leave things open for a possible sequel or more to come in the future

Rolling over you felt the cold space next to you, letting you know the space previously occupied by Matthew was now vacant. Tossing back the blankets, you headed to the kitchen, wondering why he’d left your side.

A small smile creeping across your lips as you walked in to find him putting together a plate of breakfast for you. His tongue nervously peeking from the side of his mouth as he carefully flipped the french toast out of the pan, not noticing your eyes watching him.

“Well good morning.”

Softly speaking, as not to startle him, he quickly looked up at you and smiled. Setting the pan back on the stovetop before grabbing you a fork, then placing your plate at a spot at the island.

“Good morning, I thought I could wake up and make you breakfast as a start to apologizing for yesterday. Not sure if you’re having any morning sickness yet or anything, so I hope this is okay?”

He’d clearly been googling to try and educate himself about pregnancy, which you found quite adorable. Though at this point you were still early on, so you hadn’t experienced much of the morning sickness or other symptoms yet.

“This is perfect, thank you.”

He leaned on his forearms at the island as he watched you try his cooking, nervous that you’d hate it. However you very much were enjoying every bite, not remembering the last time you had french toast.

“So, now that I’ve gotten on your good side, for now…can I ask a few questions?”

Shooting him a playful glare you nodded, knowing that he’d surely have his questions, there was no avoiding it.

“Okay, so, I’m not trying be an asshole or anything when I say this, but…how do you know for sure it, the baby sorry, is mine?”

Wiping some syrup from your lip you took a sip of your water, slightly laughing at your answer in your head before speaking it aloud.

“I mean, to be blunt…Mat pulled out and you didn’t.”

Matthew chuckled a bit himself before he’d continued with his questions. A bit surprised at the thought of your boyfriend being the one that would’ve pulled out rather than him. A blush coming over you as you felt embarrassed about the conversation, immediately feeling like this was now becoming your fault.

“Okay, so, were you not on birth control or?”

Setting your fork down, slightly pushing the plate away, you sighed. Matthew wasn’t wrong for his questions, but you couldn’t help but feel like you were being interrogated or questioned at this point.

“Look, I get it, okay? No, I wasn’t on birth control. To be honest, there were plenty of times Mat didn’t pull out and we didn’t have my scares. So, maybe it’s my fault for assuming that would be the case this time around. And yeah, should I have taken a Plan B or something to be safe. Yes, I should have. I get it. It’s my fault you and I are in this situation. It’s my fault I hurt Mat the way I did. It's my fault he hates me now. It’s my fault for cheating to begin with. It’s all my fault okay!”

You’d not even noticed you were crying until you felt the tears hitting the skin of your arm. Matthew immediately coming to your side as he held you, trying his best to calm you down.

“Y/n stop, absolutely not. Don’t even say that. Look, I don’t care that you didn’t take a Plan B pill. Everything happens for a reason, and maybe we don’t know what that reason is right now, but I wouldn’t change this. It wasn’t just you that cheated, it took both of us to do that. And, I’m sorry that I caused so much shit for you and Mat I really am. But please, you need to stop blaming yourself for everything. Remember that there were things Mat did that pushed you to that point. It wasn’t solely you, I played just as big of a role in this as you.”

You felt your breath slowing down as you relaxed in his touch, Matt always having something about him that could calm you. Hearing his words and trying to make yourself believe them, that this wasn’t solely your fault.

“I know, I just. God there’s so much to deal with now. I haven’t even thought about how the Rangers organization is going to react to this. My job is probably out the window the second they find out, if they haven’t already with that fight being so public last night.”

Matt kissed your head as he took a seat next to you, trying his best to let you vent while also trying to reassure you that things were going to work out.

“I can talk to them, we will figure this out. You’re not losing your job. And if you do, we can cross that bridge when we get to it. But please, just don’t feel like this is all your fault. If anything, we both are technically responsible for this.”

He smile as he placed his hands on your stomach, and you couldn’t help but smile yourself. The idea of Matthew Rempe, the 6 foot tall giant, holding a tiny baby in his arms making you giggle. But also warming your heart. Picturing the kind of dad he would be, seeing him as being more of a boy dad than a girl dad personally. Though the universe would ultimately be the one to decide your fate in that regard.

“Well, I hate to run out in the middle of this conversation. But I gotta get to the rink, coach asked to meet with me this morning.”

Your eyes went wide as you watched him gather his things. “Like, a bad meeting?” He shrugged, though you could see on his face it wasn’t going to be a good meeting.

“He didn’t seem angry, but with Coach it’s hard to tell. I can only assume it’s about last night. But don’t worry, everything will be fine.”

He gave you a hug and placed a quick kiss on your head. Though it didn’t calm your nerves. The last thing that needed to happen was Matt losing his spot on the Rangers to really just make this situation that much messier.

As Matt took a seat in Coach Laviolette’s office, he could feel his heart beating through his chest. Trying to tell himself it was nothing serious, though he knew it wouldn’t be a pleasant conversation.

“Rempe.”

“Coach.”

His voice was stern as he sat across the desk from Matt. His body language not giving away much as Matt could feel his hands getting sweatier by the second.

“You want to tell me what the hell that was last night? And I’m not talking about the fight, as far as I’m concerned that was normal hockey stuff. Not quite sure why one of their star players would drop the gloves with you, but that’s besides the point. I want to know why I’ve got an Islanders player getting in an argument with his girlfriend, our social media manager, and you outside my locker room last night.”

Matt nervously swallowed as he toyed with what to say, knowing that there was no good answer. But he couldn’t lie, figuring that it was better in the long run to be as honest as possible so he didn’t jeopardize either of your positions with the organization.

“Well Coach, I first want to say that I don’t want y/n to lose her job over this. None of this is her fault, if anything, that argument last night was because of me and it should not have happened publicly like that.”

He studied his coach's face for any sign of whether or not the conversation was going well, but he couldn’t read him. Continuing on as he was unsure of how to explain the situation.

“Y/n is pregnant sir. And, surely you can guess that Mat Barzal is not the father based on the argument last night. So, it’s been a rough last few days finding all of this out and trying to navigate things. But, I know that y/n and I could potentially jeopardize our positions with the organization if the news gets out about this. The last thing either of us would need right now is to lose our jobs with a baby on the way.”

Coach Laviolette slightly nodded his head, the room silent as Matt awaited a response. Unsure as to whether or not it would be one he’d like to hear.

“Well, I can make sure that neither of you lose your jobs, at least for now. I’m not sure if come next season that they wouldn’t want to keep you two apart should you be together. I at least assume you’re going to step up in that aspect for the child. But, what I’m going to ask of you going forward is to keep your distance from each other at the rink. I understand that will be hard with her job, but I think that will help your situation in terms of the organization possibly taking issue with this.”

Matt nodded, agreeing that it was probably for the best until things blow over from the argument the night before. Not needing anyone asking more questions then they surely would already be.

“The last thing I’ll say, and this is more man to man then coach to player. This is going to be a tough experience, but one that will be so rewarding. And you have a real opportunity right now, to work hard every chance you get on the ice to ensure that there is no reason we don’t put you in the lineup each night. You want to be sure you can provide for your child, that you have a spot on the roster, so take this as a sign to start busting your ass on and off the ice even more.”

“Yes sir, I appreciate that. I, I obviously want to work hard every night. And, I am so thankful for the opportunity here in New York. I really do want to work even harder to make sure I have a spot here, even looking ahead to next season. But I will make sure this doesn’t affect my focus here, and I’ll make sure any outside issues aren’t brought to the rink anymore.”

Matt could hear himself starting to babble, stopping himself before coach needed to. “Matt, I appreciate that. I can see it in you how bad you want this. And I have no doubt that you’ll continue to put the work in. This wasn’t a conversation to scare you or punish you, I just needed to know what was going on after last night. Now get out of my office and get ready for practice.”

He shot Matt a smile before sending him off, making him feel much better about things versus when he’d first sat down. A few of his teammates questioning him about the previous night’s events, to which he’d tried his best to play off. Not ready to announce the news to any of them, still processing it himself.

While Matthew was at practice you tried your best to make sense of the previous night's events. Hating that the argument happened so publicly, hating that Matthew even said anything to begin with. You wanted so badly to talk to Mat about everything, to let him hear things from you. Despite the relationship being beyond reaping at this point, you owed him that much to explain it all. At least you felt you did.

Surprisingly, you found after shooting him a text that your number wasn’t blocked. You’d asked if he would be open to talking to you, to which he said yes. He was still in the city, having spent the night after he’d apparently gone out with some of his teammates and gotten a bit too drunk.

You let Matthew know that Mat was coming over to talk, which he supported. Wanting you to have the opportunity to be the one to explain things this time around without him overstepping.

As you’d gotten the simple I’m here text from Mat, you felt your palms begin to sweat. Unsure as to what you’d say, how you’d explain things to him. Either way it was going to break his heart all over again hearing the details.

A soft knock at your door came and you thought you were going to throw up. Opening it to reveal Mat, his body language not very excited to see you. Sunglasses hiding his eyes, most likely due to a hangover. Though you’d find once he removed them that they were hiding a fresh black eye he’d gotten the night before at the hands of Matthew.

“Thanks for coming over.”

He walked past you and sat at the island, while you’d grabbed waters for the both of your from the fridge. “Sure thing. I know last night probably didn’t go how either of us would’ve liked.”

A slight chuckle left your lips as you couldn’t agree more. Your fingers nervously tapping the counter as you weren’t sure what to say or how to say it.

“Look, Mat. I never intended to hurt you like this. Believe me, I felt awful for cheating. But, I don’t think you understand how much you pushed me away. Despite knowing it was wrong, I didn’t care in the moment because I was so sure we were done. I had lost hope that things were ever going to get better. And then, you were trying. You were putting in the effort, and I wanted to marry you. I did. But the second I found out I was pregnant, and I knew it couldn’t be yours, I was torn. Because I didn’t want to lie to you that this baby was yours, and marry you and pretend like things were fine. But at the same time, I knew it had gotten to a point that there was no hiding what happened anymore.”

Mat tried his best to hold in his emotions, not wanting to cry, despite the fact that he’d cried last night over it all. Though he’d never tell you that.

“You know, when you told me you were pregnant. I even wondered myself. I knew that night we had sex there wasn’t a chance of us having a scare. But, it all seemed perfect. We’d get married, have a baby. I went along with it because I wanted it so badly to be us. But, you’re right. I wasn’t good to you, for a long time. I don’t blame you for thinking things were ending with us. I even questioned why you never left me yourself. So yeah, maybe I pushed you to hook up with him. I pushed you to look elsewhere for the things I wasn’t giving you. And for that, I’m sorry.”

The two of you sighing as you’d waited for the other to say something, not sure where you went from here.

“I, I just hate that it had to happen like this. For you to find out like you did, to get in a fight over this situation with Matthew, it all is not how I would’ve wanted it to happen. And, if you hate me now, I completely understand. I know you’ll have to explain why there’s no wedding, all of it. And I know your family is probably going to hate me too. I can accept that, I brought it on myself I guess. But, I never stopped loving you. And I’ll always love you Mat. I just need you to know none of this was intentional, or on purpose to hurt you.”

He smiled softly as you wiped away a few tears that were falling down your cheek, moving from his seat at the island to wrap you in a hug.

“I don’t hate you. Like I said, you were right and I pushed you to that point to some extent. And, I have to live with that myself. But, I don’t hate you and I’ll always love you too. And, if you ever are absolutely desperate for a babysitter, maybeee I’d volunteer.”

The two of you laughing as he pulled away, wiping a lone tear from your cheek. “Please, just, don’t be so hard on yourself about all of this, you don’t need that stress on top of everything else going on okay?”

Nodding you smiled back, before walking with him towards the door.

“And, apologize to Matthew for me. I, I know I said some things that, were shitty of me to say. He’s a good kid, and, I don’t know if you two are planning on getting together now or what, but, if he makes you happy then I’m happy for you.”

After Mat left your place, you’d felt slightly better about things, but knew it would take time for you to not be hard on yourself about the whole situation. His reaction was better than last night, and despite him understanding you could still see how he was hurt by it all. Surely not a situation he’d be over in just a few hours, and would have to relive if and when he had to explain the canceled wedding to his family and friends.

“I’m backkkk.”

Matthew playfully called out in sing song voice as he entered your apartment. Tossing his book bag to the side before he’d joined you on the couch.

“What’s verdict? Are you traded? Sent back to the minors?” He smiled at you while you sat nervously playing with the blanket that laid across your lap.

“Nope, and nope! It went decent, as good as to be expected really. He just wanted to talk to me about it all, he recommended we keep distance at the rink as much as we can. He can guarantee we won’t lose our jobs for now, but next season who knows.”

Your eyes went wide as you sat up, mouth slightly open as you were looking for what to say. “Matthew, you said it went decent! We might not have jobs next season now?”

He quickly took your hand in his, trying to calm you down and not stress yourself out too much.

“No no, he just, he’s just saying he can’t make us any promises. But he also told me not to give them a reason to take away my spot. It, it was actually a really nice sort of heart to heart moment. He told me to bust my ass and work hard so they have no reason not to put me on the ice each night. And, that’s what I’m gonna have to do. Gotta make sure daddy’s get paid the big bucks for his baby!”

Matthew leaned down and kissed your belly, earning a laugh from you as he looked up at you a bit embarrassed.

“Sorry, that was a bit much. I got a little too excited.”

He awkwardly ran a hand through his hair as he sat up next to you, but you shook your head reassuring him it was fine.

“Matthew, you’re allowed to be excited. Don’t apologize. I’m glad you’re excited, you think I want to go through this with someone who could care less?”

He smiled at you before heading into the kitchen to grab a water, resting his forearms on the island as he looked at you. His gaze making you blush as you tried to turn your attention to the tv, unsure as to why he was staring.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer!”

Holding up a pillow you blocked yourself from his gaze, only for him to come and snatch the pillow away. Sitting on the ottoman in front of you as he sipped his water.

“Okay, more questions for you.”

Rolling your eyes you muted the tv, turning your full attention to him as you sat with your hands folded in your lap. Unsure as to what in the world he could be asking you now.

“Yes matthew.”

He ignored your sarcastic tone as he mirrored the way you sat, making you smile as he continued on. “So, if we are doing this. Like, having this baby. What does that mean in terms of us?”

“Um, wow, just going right for it huh?”

His question caught you a bit off guard, not that you haven’t thought about it yourself, but you didn’t expect him to be so to the point out of nowhere.

“I mean, I just don’t want to think one thing and you’re thinking the other. I want there to be full transparency as we navigate this together. And whether that’s simply as coparents, or if we are testing the waters. I just want that to be established you know?”

“Well, I definitely would agree. I guess, we test the waters maybe? And just see where things go? I mean, I’ve never had a baby with someone before so you’re kind of in the same boat as me here.”

The two of you laughed as Matt nodded in agreement.

“Well, okay then. We test the waters in our same boat!”

“Oh my god not the dad jokes Matthew!”

Rolling your eyes you playfully kicked his leg as he sat next to you on the couch, joining you for whatever you had previously been watching.

“I promise, this is the last question for today, or at least for now. Is it too early to know if the baby is a boy or a girl?”

[nats-bottom]

SJ - Doctor's Office

Summary: Reader has anxiety about going to the doctor's office and Scarlett calms her down and distracts her.

Pairings: Scarlett Johansson and Reader

Warnings: Doctor's office, almost-panic attack, swearing, anxiety and depression mentions, medication mentions.

Notes:

I also have accounts on Wattpad and AO3! The users there are @ paige_vers

Please give me requests! You can submit them here or on my insta, @ scarlettsoutset

ᨖᨖೱᨖ⧗ᨖⴵᨖ🕷️ᨖⴵᨖ⧗ᨖೱᨖᨖ

I dreaded these days. They didn't happen often, but when they did, they always sucked. As soon as I was 16, my mom made me go to all my doctor's appointments by myself. And this year is no different. Even though it's just my yearly check-up, I still get very nervous. What if they find something wrong? What if I'm really sick? I just get all these worries in my head that don't seem to go away. 

My appointment isn't until three in the afternoon, but that's all I can think about. It's currently ten AM, but I'm just pacing around the living room of the house that me and my girlfriend, Scarlett shared. Scarlett was out getting groceries, but she should be back any minute. Then as if on queue, I hear the front door open. Unable to stop my pacing, I keep up my pacing while I hear Scarlett put away the frozens and drop the rest of the bags of groceries on the ground. I feel hands on my shoulders and look up to see Scarlett in front of me. I stop pacing and look into her beautiful, forest green eyes.

"Breathe with me" She says, taking deep breaths in and out. I didn't even realize that I was hyperventilating, but I started to follow her breathing pattern after a few breaths. Once I've calmed down enough, Scarlett takes my hands and sits us down on a couch. "Is it the doctor's appointment?" She asks, almost as if she already knows.

I nod my head, still too shaken up to speak. Her thumbs rub patterns on the back of my hands. I look down at my lap, feeling ashamed for getting all worked up over a simple appointment. 

"Hey, look at me." Scarlett says. I look up at her, worry still written all over my face. "It'll be ok. You'll be perfectly fine and healthy. You eat well, you take care of your skin, you exercise, you have no symptoms. You have nothing to be worried about." 

She lets go of one of my hands and cups my cheek. "Do you want me to go with you?" I nod, still nervous to speak, of fear that my voice might crack. This means a lot to me, as I've been going to these appointments alone for years. This will be the first time I will have gone with someone else besides my mother, and I'm glad it's Scarlett. Even though we have only been together for a year now, I'm glad she cares enough about me to go with me. For my last appointment, Scarlett was away filming. If she was here, I know that she would've come. 

"I've got to go put away the rest of the groceries. Do you want to come help me? It might take your mind off of the appointment." I nod in agreement. Scarlett gets up and gives me a hand of hers to help me get up. I take her hand and walk with her to the kitchen. I start to put away the groceries, and she walks over toward the speaker system. She looks through her phone for a minute, and grins. She turns on the speaker system, and connects her phone, playing my favorite music. Music that she knows I can't resist not dancing and singing to. She walks back over, swaying her hips to the beat, and I watch her, biting my lip. I switch my focus back to the groceries, oblivious to the fact that Scar has now abandoned her task of putting away the groceries and now is dancing along to the music. 

As I put the last few things away, I hum a bit to the music. When I put the last thing away, I actually sing a little bit. Once I am all done, I turn around, and see Scarlett dancing to the music. 

"So that's why I had to put away everything by myself. You-" I boop her nose "Were busy dancing, you cutie."

"Care to join me?" Scarlett says as she outstretches her hand to me. I gladly take it. She twirls me around, and then puts one hand on my hip. She keeps a hold of my other hand, and I put my free hand on her shoulder. We sway to the music as we both sing-shout along to the music.

The next song to come on is a slower song, so we don't shout to the music as much, but instead just sing at a normal volume. She leans in closer to me, nuzzling her head in my neck. Her arm snakes around my back, and mine around her neck. We just sway to the music, holding each other tight and close. 

Once the slow song is over, we let go of each other and start to dance our asses off to the next few songs. That's when I feel my phone buzz in my pocket. I check to see what it says, and it's a reminder that my appointment is in one hour. 

I start to panic again, and Scarlett notices. She takes a quick glance at the clock first, realizing the time, and envelopes me in a hug. I hug Scar back, taking in her scent. Her hugs always help me calm down. She pulls back peppers my face in kisses. Once my face has been fully appreciated, she rests her forehead on mine, looking into my eyes. I look back into her sparkling eyes, and let out a sigh. She always knows how to calm me down. 

"Let's go darling." Scarlett says. She knows that if she were to mention the doctor's, that might've made me panic again. She grabs her phone and her keys in one hand, and takes my hand in the other. We walk in silence to the car, where Scarlett opens the door for me and helps me get in. She gets in on her side, and after she starts the car, she connects her phone and continues the same playlist from before.

We both sing along the whole ride there. Once we get there, I'm hesitant to get out, so Scarlett comes over to help me out. She opens my door and undoes my seatbelt for me. She takes my hand, and just stands there, holding it.

"Come on, my love. We can't avoid this forever. You got this. I believe in you. Now let's get this over with." She says lovingly. She takes my hand up to her mouth and kisses my knuckles. 

I eventually get out of the car, and we walk hand in hand to the building and through the doors. I check in at the front desk, and we sit down together. We keep holding hands, and at one point she brings them up to her mouth, kissing the whole back of my hand. She knows this will keep my calm and keep my mind occupied. Before I know it, the door opens and they call out my name.

"y/n?" The nurse said. I get up and look at Scarlett. She is still sitting down, probably expecting to stay out here the entire time.

Still holding her hand, I say "You're coming with me, silly." She shoots me a playful grin, one that always gives me butterflies, and gets up, walking with me to the exam room. 

The nurse ushers me to sit on the exam bed, while he suggests Scarlett sit on one of the chairs that's in the room. "I think I'll stand," Scarlett says, still not letting go of my hand. She helps me get up on the exam bed, and stands next to me, holding my hand with her hand furthest away from me and rubbing my back with her other hand. The nurse takes my vitals, then walks out of the room. We wait a few minutes for the doctor, who eventually comes in.

The doctor comes in and tells me that everything looks normal, and the only thing that needs to be changed are my head meds. These are what me and Scar call my anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds. She gives me a new prescription and tells me to come back next year. 

She leads us to the front desk, where I schedule an appointment for next year. We walk out the car, and as soon as we're both inside, I let out a huge sigh of relief. 

"You did great, sweetie. I'm so very proud of you." Scarlett says, looking at me and resting a hand on my thigh. I put a hand of mine of top of hers, where it stays for the drive home.

[gabessquishytum]

Hello, I’m the damsel fantasy anon, I love the no sex-ed virgin dream au, particularly the pregnancy stuff, thought I’d turn it around with Hob instead being the one to get knocked up: Hob’s pretty careful with his birth control and making sure Dream wears condoms, but he decides to ask Dream one night if he’s comfortable forgoing the condom, just this once, he wants to feel Dream cum inside him, and it turns out the stars aligned that night for his birth control to fail.

Dream knows in theory that condoms were for preventing pregnancy, because Hob explained all this to him one of the few times he taught Dream about sex through discussion instead of a hands-on demonstration, but Hob was accidentally a little vague about how it applied to him, so Dream thought the two of them only used condoms for std prevention or for the nebulous “safe sex” or something. He genuinely didn’t think he could get Hob pregnant despite Hob having a pussy, because they’re still both men (learning this reasoning later, Hob has no choice but to kiss him senseless)

So when Hob starts experiencing morning sickness and other symptoms, pregnancy is the last thing on Dream’s mind as he fusses over his sick boyfriend, and he straight up bluescreens when Hob sheepishly shows him a positive pregnancy test. When he reboots (and understands that this is in fact a thing (and after Hob kisses the shit out of him)) Dream is GLUED to Hob’s side, dedicating himself to waiting on him hand and foot, constantly staring at Hob’s growing belly with awe and wonder. Feeling the baby kick is a religious experience, that’s an entire baby in there! Dream and Hob’s baby! Dream manage to put a baby in Hob!

(The pregnancy sex is a whole other revelation, seeing Hob’s changing body day-by-day, the constant reminder that Dream managed to knock him up, oh hello breeding kink nice to meet you)

(If no one minds, is 🪽anon free to take?)

Dream being trans ally icon of the year while also being the most adorably clueless bastard ever? I love it, I'm kissing it. You are so welcome to be 🪽 anon!

Imagine how nervous poor Hob would be! He's not 100% sure that Dream wants to be with him longterm, and with a baby in the middle it's all about to get so complicated. Plus Hob doesn't really have a big family to support him. But he decides to keep the kid either way, and just hope that Dream is on board too.

First Dream is like "How? You're a boy?" And Hob cries a bit and kisses him and tries to explain as much as he can that he still has all the equipment for making a baby. That they have, in fact, made a baby. That he really really wants Dream to come to the first midwife appointment because he wants them to do this together.

And for Dream it's not even a question! There's nothing that's going to stop him from staying by Hob’s side. They're boyfriends, right? They'll get through the pregnancy together and when the baby comes they'll make it all work out, somehow. He kisses Hob’s belly (which Hob thought was so cringy when he saw other people do it but now he just melts).

On Hob’s masculine frame, his belly starts to pop rather quickly. Within a few short weeks his t-shirts are riding up and he has to slink off to the shops and buy a size up. Dream is unashamedly obsessed with the bump and if Hob isn't touching it (He gets this cute habit of resting his hand on his belly) then Dream is instead. Hob dresses in dungarees and big t-shirts, but also leggings and crop tops, because the summer heat is really starting to get to him. Dream buys him the most expensive frappes that he's craving all the time now, and makes him ice packs and gives him ankle rubs.

He also just goes ahead and buys an anatomy book. It's probably time that he should learn about his own body (and Hob’s) before any further happy accidents occur. And Hob definitely still seems interested in Dream’s dick despite all the trouble it's caused! His favourite thing is lying on his side while Dream fucks him from behind, hands cupped around Hob’s belly to keep him from slipping into an uncomfortable position. He can even fall asleep with Dream rocking into him, and claims that its the only time he feels comfortable.

The day when Dream refers to himself as "daddy" for the first time is also the day when Hob's cunt finally leaks through his underwear. Its kind of mortifying for him to explain to Dream that no, his water didn't break, he's just really that horny.

[writingsofmax]

Disarm pt. 6

Words: 2,658 Story Summary: Edward Nashton is working on his Riddler plans for Gotham when he unexpectedly meets Y/N, a chronically ill artist one night while out driving. He had always been a loner that really struggled with relating to other people and now has to reckon with his growing feelings for Y/N over time as he also continues to work on his plans in secret.

Chapter Summary: Edward and Y/N go to an estate sale together on the weekend.

Tags: edward x fem reader, slowburn, chronically ill reader, anti-social Edward, emotional distress, angst, hurt/comfort

warnings: emotional distress, panic attack symptoms, descriptions of illness, and chronic illness

(apologies for the jay gif but it kinda fits the story )

Part one (has list of all chapters at the end)

Chapter 6- You Blame Yourself For Wanting More

Edward was taking Y/N to check out an estate sale with him this weekend. It was better that they were getting out instead of staying in together, better still if he tried to stick to surface-level topics with her this time.  Last week had been… a slip-up. Edward had gone over the events of their last meeting in his mind again and again, analyzing it from every angle and still he could not understand why he had been so forthcoming. He had agonized over his actions. Since when had he ever had any interest in talking about his feelings? Y/N made him feel like he was insane sometimes.

It was better to focus on something less emotional and Edward did like going to garage sales and estate sales, it was one of the few hobbies he actually had. Part of it was the curiosity of seeing how other people lived, especially the estate sales that took place in big mansions. The other was finding books, puzzles and old fashioned cards. Old fashioned cards often had silly wordplay on them that he enjoyed. Edward sat in his car, waiting for Y/N to come out. He was a little nervous. She hadn’t messaged him as much this week as she usually did. She usually averaged about 15 messages a day, give or take. 

After the couch…. incident, her messages had gone down to just 3 or 5 times per day. He had checked her patient login to see if anything was up but all that was new was a blood test that came back low for Vitamin D. So maybe she had been sleeping..? Oh! There she is.  Edward watched her make her way to the car. Her outfit today looks really beauti- No. It looks…nice. He wiped his hands off on his jeans before placing them back on the steering wheel. He felt restless for some reason.

“Hey Edward,” Y/N casually greeted him, settling into her seat. Edward studied her movements and her face intently as she fussed with her bag. She had smiled when she got in the car but she seemed tired to Edward. Her under eyes were a little dark, and her lips were a bit chapped but they still looked– Stop. “Hi!” Edward cheerfully replied a little too loudly. “Do you want to hear this joke I read online? It’s about otters.” One of her favorite animals, she should like that. Y/N looked at Edward, bewildered, “Um…sure?” Edward started the car, pulling out into the street, “Did you hear about the stampede of otters that broke free from the aquarium?”  Y/N thought for a moment,  “No? What about the otters that broke free..” she looked at Edward and he smirked at her, “from the aquarium?” Edward grinned, “It was Otter chaos!” he giggled. Y/N groaned and then laughed. Edward felt relieved, she had seemed a little down before so he was glad to make her laugh. 

Edward actually loved puns.  They were often used in crossword puzzles and riddles and it was really nice for him to finally have someone worthy to share them with. Edward glanced over at Y/N furtively. She was resting her face against the window, passively watching the scenery pass by as they drove, he frowned. “Oh, if you check that bag on the floor, I picked up something for you in there.” Edward announced.  Y/N reached down and pulled a container of Vitamin D supplements out of the white paper bag. She didn’t say anything, just looked at Edward for an explanation.  “It starts getting dark in Gotham this time of year, and I thought that with your chronic illness you might be affected more than others by the daylight changes.” Edward said matter of factly without taking his eyes off the road.  “That is oddly thoughtful Edward, thank you.” Y/N continued, “I actually had been meaning to pick some up, that’s so weird that you— Oh is this it?” They had pulled up to a huge mansion on a tree-lined street. It had a huge yard and Edward could see some rose bushes just behind a large ornate iron gate. “Yep.” Edward said, pulling the car into park. He looked up at the house and his eyes flashed. 

“Eat the rich,” he muttered. Parasites. Y/N deserved this house more than any of the owners did, he was sure of it. I am going to get rid of all of them soon, in just a few weeks.

“Bet this house wasn’t even the owner’s only house,” he spat. “Bet this house was owned by people who made all their money off of other people working instead of actually doing it themselves,” Y/N replied.  “Bet there’s a lot of stealable items in there.” Edward said, scanning the front of the building.  Y/N gave him a dubious look, “I’m not trying to get arrested today, Edward.”  Edward scoffed as they crossed under the gate, “As if I would let myself get caught.” —-----------------------------------

Y/N climbed out of the car slowly, feeling a bit dizzy. This time of year was always hard on her with the sudden temperature changes and the cold. She watched Edward walk ahead of her into the house, watched the way his jacket hung off of his tall frame, how the wind ruffled his messy hair. Lately all she could think of was him. Edward had come into her life so suddenly, but her life had changed because of it.  She walked into the first room of the estate with him, sticking close to his back as there were many other people sifting through the estate items as well. 

When she ran into Edward for the first time, she had been struggling immensely. Her illness had been getting worse and the symptoms were unbearable. She was unable to work, unable to be out for long periods of time and found herself in her room almost all of the time, her only connection to the outside world being the internet. She truly had felt like she had been forgotten by the world while everything else moved on without her. 

Over time it had caused more and more distance between her and her friends, until she didn’t hear from them anymore. She had accepted it because she didn’t want to drag them down anyway. What fun was a friend that was sick all the time? That was when her night time escapades started. She hadn’t cared what would happen to her.  And then we started talking regularly. She watched Edward as he inspected some old antique silverware, turning a knife carefully in his long slender fingers. They had started talking, and suddenly she wasn’t being forgotten anymore. The two of them talked about everything, she could even talk about her illness and what she was experiencing with him and he would just listen. Her illness didn’t put him off, he was often quite curious about it. On days where she was feeling too tired to talk or walk around they would just read together. 

She honestly felt like he was saving her life. 

Her symptoms were still awful and she was still stuck in her apartment a lot but she didn’t go out walking at night anymore. She didn’t feel as cooped-up, she didn’t feel as if she didn’t matter. “The poor have it, the rich need it, what am I?” Edward muttered to himself while rolling his eyes as they entered the next room, which seemed to be a ballroom of sorts. Y/N smiled at Edward’s back fondly. She loved his riddles. Edward was so weird sometimes, Y/N thought, her mind going back to the Vitamin D pills waiting in the car, but she loved that about him. 

Ugh, I’ve got to stop thinking like that. She had to stop indulging these feelings, she never wanted to make Eddi–Edward, uncomfortable. He had practically fallen over himself to get away from her the last time they had met up at his apartment. She thought of how he had immediately taken her home after she had touched him. She winced at the memory. 

Plus Edward was brilliant. Smarter than anyone she had ever met, and a lot of times she felt like she couldn’t keep up. I’m not smart enough for him.  She took a deep breath to clear her thoughts and to her dismay felt like she wasn’t getting enough air. Ugh not this again. She continued walking on with Edward through the rooms, each grander than the last. “Do you think they really need 3 living rooms? Seems excessive,” she wondered out loud. “You already know what I think, Y/N.” Edward retorted, glowering at his surroundings. Y/N did know, she could only guess the number of irritated remarks he was thinking behind his beautiful green eyes. All of the thoughts going on underneath the messy brown hair. She sighed again, turning her gaze anywhere other than Edward. Ugh, my head feels weird. Y/N noted that her arms and legs were starting to feel heavy and off balance, her hands and fingers feeling numb as well. She clenched and unclenched her hands trying to get the pins and needles feeling to go away but it wasn’t helping. She kept trying, but she couldn’t get a full breath in either. Shit. Okay. Don’t panic. Half of the battle of controlling her symptoms was just controlling the panic that came with having them in a public place. She counted inhales and exhales but was still extremely lightheaded, and it was only getting worse. She would have to admit defeat this time. She quickly walked over to Edward who was carefully inspecting some vintage cards on a table. She reached up and lightly tugged on the back of his dark green jacket, her heart rate climbing. “Ed…Eddie..” she mumbled, trying not to panic. Edward turned around, and gently took her outreached hand into his, “Mmm?” He looked into her eyes with a concerned look, “What’s wrong?” His green eyes searching her face for answers. Y/N could feel her face getting hot from him being so close and holding her hand so gently. She almost couldn’t bear his concerned gaze. “I…I don’t feel so good, I think I need to go home.” she looked down at the ground. She hated this. She hated always being the one to ruin plans, to end outings early because her stupid body didn’t work normally. She was jerked out of her thoughts as she realized she was being pulled. Wordlessly, Edward took her hand in his, and led her back through the house, pushing through large groups of people. Some people gave him dirty looks or tried to protest but he just pushed past them quickly, not stopping until they were outside.  Once outside, he pulled her straight over to a wrought-iron bench in the gardens, “Sit.” Y/N sat down, looking up at him, “I don’t think we’re supposed to be over here Eddie.” “You think I care about what some rich people do or don’t want me to do?,” he asked, pacing in front of the bench a bit. He seemed… on-edge. “You needed a place to sit, I’m going to find you a place to sit.” He stopped pacing and turned to Y/N. She felt like she was being examined and it made her feel flustered.   He crouched down in front of her, “What’s going on?” he asked softly.  “I’m… I’m just getting light-headed and having some breathing problems… My heart rate is a little high too. I think I need to go home.” She bit the inside of her cheek and looked at the ground. “I’m super sorry, we weren’t here for very long…” she apologized while getting up. She was so embarrassed that this was happening. “Don’t apologize to me.” Edward interjected, sternly. “But– you would have been here for way longer if it wasn’t for me!” Y/N argued, trailing behind him back to the car.  Edward turned around and faced her, “Do you have any evidence to back up that statement?” He asked with a raised eyebrow.  “I–It’s….You– you would of–” Y/N floundered. “That’s not even a sentence.” Edward scolded, “Come on, Y/N, we need to get you home.”

------------------------------------------

Pulling up outside of Y/N’s house Edward helped her inside. If she had seemed sad before when he picked her up, it was worse now. Seeing her this way made the anger rise inside of him.

He had already been angry, inside that giant mansion, looking at how the other half lived while everyone else was forced to beg for scraps. A fucking ballroom. These assholes can afford a fucking ballroom, while the rest of us can barely pay rent. And then Y/N had gotten sick, a shining example of where that money would be better spent. It made him fucking furious. 

Being angry right now isn’t going to help anything. Being angry was fuel for The Riddler, right now he needed to be Edward Nashton.

“Hey,” Edward started, doing his best to swallow the rising anger, “How about tomorrow, after you rest… I take you anywhere you wanna go?” he suggested. “I have the day off.” Internally Edward was berating himself. I have SO much engineering work on my traps left to do that I was going to do tomorrow.. That's why I took the damn day off.

But still, she had just looked so defeated. He was going to save Gotham, sure, but she was his first priority.

Edward felt a shiver down his spine when he realized that his last thought was true. She made all the work worth it. At first it was just for him, but now with someone else to look out for it made the work more rewarding.

“Are you sure Edward?” Y/N asked from her spot on the couch, resting with her arm over her eyes.

Edward nodded, “Yes. I wouldn’t have offered it if I didn’t want to.”

Y/N was quiet for a time, seeming to consider it. “Well, there is this place outside of Gotham that I’ve been wanting to go see again. It’s really pretty and it's nice to get out of the city.” 

She raised her arm off of her eyes to look at Edward. “It’s about an hour out though.. I can think of somewhere else” she said, changing her mind.

“No, let's go there tomorrow. I could use time out of the city.” Edward replied. Any day where I don’t have to be reminded of the lies this city is built upon is a good one.

“Are you sure?” Y/N asked, worriedly. “I don’t want to put you out.”

“Stop asking me the same question. Yes.” Edward sighed, “You should get some rest Y/N. Do you want to go tomorrow afternoon?” He asked, looking at Y/N expectantly.

“Sure,” Y/N smiled. “That sounds good.” She turned over on the couch, pulling a blanket that was folded on the top of it over her.

“Okay, I’m gonna let you get some rest…” Edward watched as she curled up on the couch, he wanted to pull the blanket up over her more but resisted the urge. “Please make sure to lock the door behind me when I leave okay?” He felt an ache  in his chest watching her sit back up and smile at him. He wanted to stay in the apartment with her so badly. It was strange because normally he wanted nothing more than to be left alone.

“I will! See you tomorrow Edward.”

Edward returned the smile and then left the room, gently closing the door behind him. He stood there until he heard the door latch a few minutes later, and with a heavy sigh, walked back out to his car.

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[etherealeeknow]

the fwb rules

• rated m for mature

• pairing: fwb!hyunjin x fem!reader

• wc: 4.559

• tw: explicit language, light characterization of an insecure reader, unprotected piv sex (stay safe, lovelies!), fingering & oral (f), nipple play, cream pie— i think that’s all, please do tell me if you find more c:

• note: last time i said long fic isn’t my forte and this time i’ll still say the same hahahahaha. but still, i hope i don’t disappoint 🥺 please kindly note that english isn’t my first language. therefore, i apologize for any mistakes. feedbacks are always appreciated because i’d love to grow! thank you for waiting and enjoy 💞 pretty banner made by my bestie!! ilysm 😽😽😽

• tag list: @charlieshelves @es-kay-zee @formidxble @oh-my-sparkle @bobateastay @http-hyxnjxn @lyralurexrattle @hyunsluvv @healinghyunjin @sailorhyunjinz

—

what happened to the rules?

it didn’t start off like this. you can’t remember when exactly you started wondering about the five word question. all you know is that you were one bite away from gobbling a spoonful of jisung’s ice cream when it struck you: since when did you and hyunjin stop going by the rules? he’s been occasionally texting you out of the blue lately just to know what you’re up to, and today he even asked you to stay the night at his, and as much as you want to believe they’re all normal, again, it didn’t start off like this. from the beginning, you and hyunjin have come up with three rules so your relationship can work: one, be very casual. two, no strings attached. three, no fucks given outside of the, well, literal fucking. but look at you now, lying naked and out of breath under his blanket while facing his ceiling, driving yourself insane over the haunted question. you have to get it off your chest somehow, but how? 

“hey, why so serious?” asks the culprit behind your overthinking, causing you to jump slightly over his sudden appearance and your hands instinctively pull up the blanket to cover your naked chest, which as a result, makes him chuckle. cute. “here. it’s my cousin’s,” adds the topless man as he sits on the edge of the bed and hands you a white shirt that even under the dim light, you can already tell won’t fit you.

“your cousin? the model? hyunjin, she’s tiny,” you utter, hands still gripping onto the blanket. “i’m—“

“you,” he cuts you off, placing a hand on top of yours while carefully glancing at you to make sure you there aren’t any signs of discomfort. “are fine, y/n. now hurry up. i’m sleepy,” he adds before letting go, leaving behind a lingering warmth on your knuckles.

nodding, you turn your back on him to change, and the room falls silent, causing you to hear how fast your heart is thumping even more than it should have. is it because you had too much coffee this morning? or it can probably be because the shirt is too tight that it’s cutting off your air circulation, right? right, of course. you tell yourself because as much as you dislike both reasons, they are still far better than having hyunjin as the cause.

once you’re done, hyunjin already has his back lying against the bedhead, his head tilting slightly to the side, avoiding the light coming from the night lamp on the bedside table, while his eyes bore deeply into yours. unbothered that he’s been caught staring, he averts his gaze downwards till they reach your chest and spot how your nipples are sticking out through the thin fabric.

“see? it fits you just fine,” he says, turning his vision back to your face as he opens his arms and motions them at you, only to have you remain in the same position with your increasing heartbeat.

“aren’t you gonna, uh, wear something?”

instead of a proper answer, all you get is his laugh—hyunjin’s contagious laugh that usually always succeeds in making you laugh too. but today hits differently. has his laugh always sounded this lighthearted before? no matter what the answer is, one thing for sure is that despite how sweet hwang hyunjin and his laugh are, they have never made your cheeks burn like this before, and this is forbidden. it’s against the rules.

“an hour ago we were naked while sucking each other’s face, y/n,” he finally answers after a while. “besides, i always sleep like this. now, come on,” he adds, repeating the same gesture, except this time his hands are open wider, eager to have you near him again because the space around him is starting to make him feel lonely.

complying with him, you fall into his embrace and hyunjin immediately lets his hands travel to the exact places of where they want to be—one around your head and the other around your waist. despite the room turning less cold with his warmth directly passing onto you, your heart and cheeks conditions remain the same especially since you can hear how hyunjin’s heartbeats are beating just as fast as yours when he lets you lay your head on his chest.

“hyunjin,” you call out, hands fiddling with the collar of your shirt.

“y/n,” he replies, replacing the collar with his fingers instead, intertwining them with yours.

what happened to the rules?

“do... do fwb do these?” you ask, the bravery in you finally decide to show up, even just for a little.

“do this?” he asks back while squeezing your hand with all his might, as if he’s nervous.

no. not ‘this’, but ‘these’. not only the hand grabbing, but also the fact that he asked you to stay the night, that he’s cuddling you to sleep, and that you’ve been getting unusual symptoms over them until this very moment.

“yes, this,” you nod and hyunjin becomes muted, but his heartbeats are growing louder, and his grip on you has become tighter.

after what feels like forever, he whispers, voice slightly cracking, and hands getting a little colder, “yes. yes, they do.”

then the two of you become muted, but both heartbeats keep growing louder, and everything stays that way until sleep eventually takes over.

—

as a homebody, you’ve always against the idea of sleepovers. you believe home is the sweetest place and your own bed is the comfiest even when your mattress is older than a decade and your favorite plushie has had too many holes here and there. but waking up in hyunjin’s bed has broken your stigma—never in your whole life that you’d have thought someone else’s bed can provide you twice the comfort.

“looks like someone had a good sleep,” chirps jisung as he sits beside you, causing you to wipe off the smile on your face before going back to your laptop.

“wow suddenly my best friend’s a psychic?”

“hey, that’d actually make a great drama title!” he exclaims and you roll your eyes. “please do spill the tea though. what happened?” he adds.

“what happened?” you ask back, eyes still on the screen, but the corner of your lips are on the verge of breaking into the smile, knowing full well he’ll complain—which he does by lamely calling you a meanie.

laughing, you tell him nothing happened, but the way he rolls his eyes is a sign he’s not taking any of your bullshit. you are telling the truth though. besides spending the night with each other, nothing really happened, right? it was just another casual fucking session. yes, it was amazing, but that’s no news for jisung. the guy’s practically your wingman—setting you up with hyunjin was his idea because he believes you should, “live your life. have that dreamy college sex orelse you’ll regret it like my old man changbin!”

right on cue, a notification popped out on your big screen, and the sender’s name makes your heart pop too.

“aha, see!” jisung points at it. “y/n, where are you?” he reads out loud, earning yourselves all the eyes from every other student in class.

“oh my god, jisung. shut up!” right when you’re about to log out from the chat app, hyunjin sends another one.

“can i call you?” jisung reads once more and you’re only one second away from smacking his head, but your vibrating phone holds you back.

shooting jisung a glare, you make sure to close your laptop before leaving the class, answering hyunjin’s call even when you’re still half way through the door. right when you’re about to greet him hello, hyunjin beats you to it—his voice a bit raspy, but the softness in his tone still lies within, and it creates endless questions in your mind.

has he just woken up? so is this how he sounds in the morning? why is he calling?

and the list goes on because this isn’t like hyunjin at all. sure, he’s not validating the rules, but he’s breaking his character despite already alarming you to anticipate morning booty calls from him at times. he’s never actually done that though. 

“hi,” you reply, startling yourself with how small your voice came out.

“you left,” says hyunjin and you can hear him sighing from the other line, which somehow causes a slight pang in your heart, wondering if perhaps he is disappointed. “can you come back? wait, actually, let me go to you instead.” he says and you can hear the rustling sounds coming from his side.

“hyunjin, i have class. that’s why i left. i—” should you apologize? but why should you? casual, no strings attached, and no fucks given, remember? “i’m sorry.”

“oh.” hyunjin stops on his track before plopping back down onto the bed, smiling. “i’ll pick you up after class then. when will you finish?”

unconsciously, a smile creeps up your face too, but the realization hits you right after, then followed by the five word question, and you know—you know this is your guts telling you that now’s the time to ask him about it, but your heart hates confrontation. plus, wouldn’t it be rude to reply to someone else’s question with a question? “hyunjin, are you, uh, horny?”

just like yesterday, hyunjin laughs, and with the raspiness in his voice still present, he doesn’t fail to make you laugh along, but at the same time waking the butterflies in your stomach and makes you rethink your decision. mayhaps, you should’ve left him a note or told him that you’ll leave early in the morning; or even, you should’ve ditched classes today and stayed so when he wakes up, you can get him a glass of water, not leaving the boy uncared for like this. but who are you to do so? 

“isn’t it normal for a guy to have a morning wood?” he jokes before quickly adding that he’s not horny. “i just want to see you so let me go get you.”

pressing your lips together, you contemplate on whether you should let him. if you do, won’t you be turning whatever the two of you have right now into something far more complicated? but it’s only until hyunjin adds a desperate “please?” that all of your dilemma disappears, as if you’re being cast into his spell—“okay.”

—

while heading to the gate, you have the biggest urge to book a massage appointment. dodging jisung’s questions and running away from him after the first period was draining, but having to spend the day running back and forth between two buildings because thinking that volunteering as the lecturers’ teaching assistant was draining on a whole new level. other than feeling like your legs are gonna come off, your mind also feels like it’s gonna blow off—you can’t stop recalling all the things you need to start working on as soon as possible, but stepping into hyunjin’s car turns everything to 180 degrees.

you’d like to think that it’s because of the faint lavender aroma coming from his car freshener along with the heavenly cool air conditioner, but no. you know full well it’s because of the way hyunjin’s smile lit up, his eyes disappear into two small crescent moons, and his blonde hair which is becoming one with the warm orange sky that brings peace to your heart.

“hi,” he breathes out the moment you close the door, and you do the same except for looking at him, which causes hyunjin to furrow his eyebrows while speeding away.

the way home is silent, just the way you like it, but you know full well that it’s not hyunjin’s cup of tea. he doesn’t need to say it, his action is showing it all as he’s been fidgeting non stop, wiping his sweaty palm along his jeans while occasionally licking his plump lips. hyunjin’s a very vocal person. he’s talkative and loud—including in bed. you press your warm cheeks over the realization of your own thoughts, embarrassed. you can’t possibly suspect hyunjin for being horny in the morning when you yourself are being like this in the afternoon. it’s uncalled for.

noticing you from the corner of his eye, hyunjin calls out, asking you if there’s anything wrong, totally catching you off guard. what should you say? lying is not your forte, but being honest clearly isn’t the best option right now, at least, not before you shower and appear presentable in front of him—but wait, since when did that matter so much? a few months ago, you even fucked after you ran a marathon.

“y/n?” calls hyunjin for the second time.

“look, hyunjin, really, it’s okay if you’re horny. you can pull over and i can, uh, relieve you and i can just take the bus home after,” you spit out shamelessly while looking at him straight in the eyes, eager to get far away from hyunjin as fast as possible before you go out of your mind.

just like the night before, hyunjin laughs. and just like the night before, his laugh hits differently and it does nothing other than burning your already burnt cheeks for the worse.

“i swear to god, y/n, i’m not horny. i genuinely want to take you home. nothing more,” explains hyunjin, head straight at the road but eyes repeatedly stealing glances at you. “and nothing less,” he adds, voice barely audible but you caught it.

“o— oh.” is all you manage to respond before the ride quickly turns quiet and hyunjin’s hands begin fidgeting again, all the while you’re trying to decode what he has just said—what does he mean by genuinely wanting to take you home? do fwb do this too? what happened to no fucks given?—and it goes on until hyunjin hits the break in front of your old apartment building.

“we’re here,” says hyunjin, breaking the silence by unlocking the car door.

“we’re here,” you repeat after him, already opening the door and setting a foot out. “uh, thank you.”

“don’t mention it.” hyunjin shoots you his signature smile the moment you lower yourself to meet his eye level from outside the car; this time, you have no choice but to fall under his spell.

“hey, uh, you wanna come in?” you ask, biting your lower lip as a way to punish yourself for being so indecisive. one second you want to run away from him and the next second you want to be near him. come on, get a grip.

as if the punishment isn’t enough, hyunjin declines your offer, all while chuckling with his head thrown back. “for the third time, y/n. i’m not horny. go in and rest up.” 

“if you say so.” you shrug, giving him a small smile before turning around, making sure not to look back, only to fail when you hear the engine driving away.

—

you can’t quite tell—no, you can’t tell. you don’t get it. there’s an unexplainable empty space in your heart that is caused by hyunjin’s rejection. is it because you’re just not used to see him without having to fuck him? or is it because you’re hurt over the fact that he’s not in the mood to touch you? is it because of last night? is he finally sick of your flaws? things would probably be different if you had retouched your makeup or at least combed your hair before seeing him, would they? either way, you’re fully aware you shouldn’t be torn over your friend with benefits, yet your aching heart says otherwise.

and so when the doorbell rings only a few seconds after you get in and the figure you see through the peephole is no other than the man in question, you spare no time to swing the door open. hyunjin, in return, spares no time to lock his lips with yours right after he utters a brief apology. just like the way hyunjin sneaks his playful hands down your ass, you sneak your tongue in his mouth, and your action makes him smile into the kiss as he leads you back into the room and kicks the door shut with his long legs.

the way to your bedroom is actually pretty short, but with your tongues moving in sync, bodies pressing—glued, even, and eyes continuously closing in pleasure, the short way to your bedroom consists of endless stumbling, tripping, and bumping the door. once inside, you break the kiss and are about to undress yourself when hyunjin beats you to it, settling you down on the bed as he begins taking off your attire one by one ever so effortlessly. and in just a matter of seconds, his lips are back on yours again, floral scented hair falling and brushing against your cheeks, leaving you no time to wonder over the fact that it’s the first time hyunjin has ever undressed you. 

as the kiss continues, you can feel yourself gushing more and more that you start grinding on him mindlessly, needing to feel more than just his bulge poking you. your hands leave his blonde strands to tug on his hoodie, only to have him stop you—one hand around your grip and the other rests on your hip.

“what do you think you’re doing?”

“need you. need to feel you,” you mumble, desperation so visible through your cracked voice. 

“what happened to the girl who was all flustered to sleep with me last night just because i was shirtless?”

autumn nights aren’t supposed to be hot, but hyunjin has proven he has the power to make the impossible happen just with his words and mocking smirk. but the rising heat on your cheeks is nothing compared to the emptiness you feel below, clenching around nothing surely isn’t the best feeling.

“please, jinnie,” you whine, tugging on his hoodie once more, hips moving against his hold.

“fuck.” is all he manages to say before getting off the bed to disrobe himself—hoodie and track pants thrown across the room, now showcasing his toned body and thighs altogether as he hovers over you.

“please take this off too. it looks suffocating,” you say, index finger running faintly through the bulge forming from his tight boxer, making it stand up even more and hyunjin has no choice but to obey you. “put your hair up too please,” you add just when he’s about to dive right back in, and again, your wish is his command.

biting to pull off his hair tie from his wrist, hyunjin smoothly ties his hair back and you’re only given a few seconds to admire his feature before his plump lips coming in contact with your hardened nipple while he toys with the other using his fingers—rubbing and pinching, making your breath hitch over the sensation, fingers digging into his bare shoulders because you don’t want to mess up his hair, and hyunjin’s low grunts pretty much indicate he’s loving it.

“more, please. give me m—”

hyunjin retreats his hand and tongue away from your breast, moving them to your naked pussy,  drawing circles on your outer labia with his middle finger. he teases you just enough and quickly slides in his digit and at the same time sucks on your clit right before you’re about to complain, making you tingle from head to toe.

“you hear that?” he asks, voice muffled, the effect of being too tongue tied from licking every part of your heat, but finger working its magic perfectly, creating loud wet noises from your fluid. “drenched. my pretty y/n is drenched,” says hyunjin, and as much as you want to comment on him for the pet name, you’re too caught up on how his lips vibrate against you the moment he starts palming himself with his unoccupied hand. if he keeps it up, you know you would come undone there and then, and you don’t want that—not yet. so you ask him to stop and he instantly does as told.

“what’s wrong? did i hurt you?” there’s fear written across his expression and heard from his tone, but you’d like to believe your eyes and lips are just playing tricks on you.

“n— no. i just,” you pause to avoid his gazes, but something within you pulls your attention back on him. “i wanna cum with you inside me,” you confess, voice barely audible due to embarrassment; all this time, it’s always been hyunjin to say such things, but perhaps, all the strange tension lately has finally gotten the best of you. you hear him mutter a low “fuck” while his pupils shakes for a brief moment before they somehow appear a shade darker. licking his lower lip, hyunjin pulls you by your legs and rests them on his shoulders, and proceeds to align his tip with your entrance, once again teasing your throbbing core.

the moment you whine is the moment hyunjin pushes himself inside ever so gently, but the stretching still has you throwing your head back, while hyunjin letting our airy moans upon your walls clenching around him. none of you can tell how it’s possible for your vagina to remain so tight after all the countless fucking session for the past half year, but hyunjin doesn’t find that troubling. in fact, he lives for that and it shows from the way his eyes roll to the back of his head as he begins thrusting in and out of you—slowly but steady, veiny hands secured on your hips, vision goes back and forth from your half-lidded eyes to your parted lips.

hyunjin leans down to kiss you for a couple of seconds, and when he lets go, he quickens his pace—leaning down once more so his length can go deeper in you, hitting your g-spot. at that very moment, you mentally praise yourself for placing the bedroom mirror right across the bed. it presents you with the magnificent view of hyunjin’s rounded, firm ass bouncing rhythmically whenever he snaps his hips, and placing your hands around them, squeezing them, nearly makes you drool over the sight. with hyunjin constant thrusts, the familiar knot in your abdomen starts to bubble up.

“oh my god,” the two of you whimper in unison as hyunjin begins to lose his tempo, moves also grow sloppy, but never once misses your spot.

“y/n, i— ah— i’m so close. fuck,” he breathes out, sweat forming on his forehead, wetting his baby hair down to his neck and chest, and you can only drool helplessly at the sight.

“me too. please cum inside me, cum with me, hyunjin, please, please,” you beg, voice a pitch higher, almost sounds like you strain your throat, and it stays the same. when you feel hyunjin twitch inside you, your hands automatically reach for the bed sheet again, but it only lasts for a second before they’re being taken by hyunjin’s own hands—he has never done this. while intertwining your fingers, his cock twitches again and his eyes roll to the back of his head, jaw falls open as he calls out your name—you naturally do the same, fingers pressing flat against his white knuckles

“hyu—”

“cum, baby,” he cuts you off, averting his hazy eyes on you, and that’s all it takes for you to break—your orgasm washes over you like waves and you cum undone around hyunjin, shaking and mewling altogether while feel the wet coldness around your inner thigh. hyunjin follows right after, shooting his hot cement inside of you; the man can no longer keep his eyes open as he buries his face on the crook of your neck, his choked moans bring music right to your ear all a while his hot breaths bring goosebumps to your unrecovered body.

after riding out your highs, none of you move. hyunjin stays on top of you, his chest rises and falls according to your hard breathing. somehow, it’s calming you down, but it shouldn’t.

“hyunjin, you’re heavy.”

“oh, sorry,” he chuckles and even without looking, you can tell his eyes are smiling too. with his remaining strength, hyunjin pushes himself up and rests on your thighs to pull his dick out of you, momentarily admiring the mixture of his juice and yours dripping down your cunt before fixing his eyes on you to study your face—also something he has never done before. 

“i’m sorry,” he mutters a few moments later, eyes now on you.

tilting your head, you sit up, resting your upper body with your hands on the bed. “all of a sudden? i came? you always make me feel good.”

“that’s what i’m sorry about. i— i didn’t mean to— i mean, i—”

you reach out to him, gently patting his thigh. “hyunjin, calm down. this isn’t like you,” you whisper the last sentence, knowing that perhaps, now’s the time to talk things out, to stop whatever is going on, and go back to how things are used to be, maybe? your heart’s just been restless for too long and apparently, hyunjin seems to be in a similar situation too.

“i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to keep using you like this. i genuinely meant what i said. i only wanted to take you home, but we ended up here and—”

“isn’t that what fwb do?” you pull your hand off his thigh, and a frown painted across his face as if he’s questioning your question. “that’s what we agreed on. we have our fwb rules, remember?”

“one, be very casual. two, no strings attached. three, no fucks given outside of the, well, literal fucking,” says hyunjin, proving he has memorized every words to the back of his mind.

nodding, you carefully bring back your hand to his thigh, repeating the same movement you did before. “exactly. so you don’t have to be sorry. don’t worry, i’m not feeling used at all.” you end it with a smile.

hyunjin mirrors you, he smiles too; his eyes fall to where your hand is. “but what if i’m breaking them? the rules,” asks the boy whose cold hand is now on top of your warm one. “what if i like you?” his eyes find their way back to you, and that’s when you know. the difference between your temperatures; the difference between your smile and his—the sadness that lies within.

that’s when you understand. everything finally makes sense; every one of hyunjin’s unusual acts. the constant texts and calls, the undressing, the pet names, the facial expression, the hand holding.

what happened to the rules? feelings. that’s what happened. to hyunjin, it’s his feelings over the rules.

but you, what about you? the butterflies, the irregular increasing heartbeats, the flushing cheeks, the overthinking, the disappointment at some point.

“y/n,” hyunjin calls out and you don’t get to get back to him because he’s already an inch away from you, momentarily eyeing your lips before he closes the distance. once again, his blonde hair falls down, brushing against his cheek before meeting yours and it tickles you, but not in the same way as how his kiss tickles your heart; giddy.

what happened to the rules? unwanted feelings. that’s what happened. to you, it’s the unwanted feelings against the rules. and for now, the unwanted feelings are too strong for you to push him away, so you pull him close instead. for now.

—

gen’s masterlist

repeating this!! special note: HUGE THANK YOU for my awesome bestie for the banner 🥺💞💞 ily, bish!! thank you for being my beta reader too 😽😽😽

[furiousgoldfish]

Learning more about trauma recovery, I realized that even if we all have similar cptsd symptoms (emotional flashbacks, inner shame and guilt, abandonment issues, fear of other's negative reactions to us, fight/flight/freeze/fawn response, highly anxious behaviour, perfectionism, catastrophizing, chronic exhaustion and pain, panic attacks, struggle expressing anger, dissociation, grief, negative thinking, fear of the future, hopelessness, suicidal ideation) it's usually one or two of them that are specifically strong and tako a hold of someone's entire personality. For instance, someone will try to find a way out of fear by constantly doing more and more and try to always be perfect, another one will freeze and do nothing in a stressful situation; some will avoid people altogether, some will run from one painful relationship to another. Some might find their inner critic so powerful they get unable to do anything due to the constant shame and berating from inside of their head, and some will sink into dissociation and numbness in order to withstand being alive.

For me, it was the inner catastrophizer that was so loud, overbearing, and impossible to fight; I hadn't recognized it as a trauma symptom because I believed every bit of it was true. My imagined catastrophe was dying from lack of resources, or being tortured to death. Both felt like a very likely scenarios to happen because I do live in poverty, with minimal resources, and I've already experienced torture so it seemed like it's highly possible for it to happen again. I couldn't see that I've survived years on my own, without any help, and that I've became more resourceful than most people, or that I had saved myself from torture and kept myself safe. Every single time a minor stress would appear, I would spiral into wild scenarios of myself homeless, dying, or in unbearable pain. It would trigger a nervous breakdown, lots of flashbacks, panic attacks, and bring me to such highly anxious state I wouldn't be able to move for days. I didn't see a way out of this, I believed I was brainwashed to experience this over and over again, and panicked severely when it started getting worse.

It was only when I found out about other survivors having the exact same imagined catastrophy, I was able to see it was fake. People with jobs, friends, family, loved ones, resources and safety, were having the exact same fear of dying homeless. Circumstances don't matter to the catastrophizer, it will find a path to your worst, most painful scenario even if it's next to impossible for it to happen.

Reading the 'Complex PTSD' book, I learned that these catastrophic thoughts can and should be de-escalated and stopped in their tracks by a stream of logical, factual thoughts that challenge the unlikeliness and fakeness of the imaginary disaster. I trained my mind to do it immediately, unspeakably relieved to know it's something I can do on my own, it's do-able, it's progress I can make just by arguing with my own thoughts!

Ever since that day, I haven't allowed myself to spiral into a catastrophic thoughts once, and it's done wonders for my recovery. It was like dragging myself from the bottom of the pit to a place where I could breathe again. I only now acknowledge how extremely damaging it was on my body to be broken down like that regularly, how impossible it was to live always followed by that terror, how unreasonable it was to expect from myself to endure it. I still break down a lot, but from grief, which is healthy for me to break down about, and it doesn't throw me into a paralyzing pit of terror.

I also need to acknowledge that this is not something I'd be able to do at the beginning of the recovery; at the start I had every single symptom screaming in my face, it was all I could do to stay alive thru it all. Over the course of several years, a lot of the symptoms quieted down on their own, just because I was getting used to life in a non-abusive environment. The catastrophizer was one that kept getting bigger and more stressful as others got smaller and more manageable.

I believe most of my symptoms died down because I was allowing myself to seek out a comfort zone; giving myself a place to feel safe and not triggered by whatever, gave me a lot of peace, a refuge to hide in. After finding a little peace of the world I was safe in, this world began to expand, until I saw a way to have a life in it. It has its limits, of course, and if I try doing certain things I will absolutely get triggered and my well-being will be obliterated. But I'm not looking for a life where I can do everything. Only to stay alive, and to not be in terror. It's a humble yet very complicated desire for a traumatized person to have.

I no longer have to actively stop my catastrophic thoughts; my brain now does it for me. If I start spiraling, a voice in my head will go 'Wait a minute, that doesn't sounds realistic, isn't it more likely x will happen and it will be okay? Come on, you don't have to be terrified about this, because it's not real. It will be okay, and here's every single instance where a similar event went well for you. You will pull thru this one, and even if you don't, the consequence won't be death, or torture, or everyone alive hating you. At worst you will feel slightly bad, so it's okay to feel good now. You've done a lot to get this far. All will be well.'

And that is a very pleasant inner voice to have, and I am grateful for it. I wish so badly that I had this earlier in life, but I guess looking at my parents, there was no way.

What is your worst reoccurring symptom that stops you from progressing in your recovery? If you feel like you're at the stage where you can recognize it and talk about it, it would be beneficial for everyone recovering to read more experiences.

[pies-writes-and-more]

allergic to you

Word Count: 3, 713

Pairing: Tsukishima Kei x High School Age!Fem!Reader

Warnings: some swear words I guess, but as per usual, it’s just fluff from me. 

A/N: Guess who’s finally joined another fandom lol hello Haikyuu fandom! Pls be kind, it’s my first time writing for this fandom but I am in love with Karasuno boys, it’s problematic. Anyways, please let me know if you liked it! Sorry if I didn’t quite capture him the way other writers do haha. Also, Y/N = Your (Last) Name, just cause typing Y/L/N is exhausting lol my b

(Not my gif, credits to the original creator!)

Yamaguchi was trying his very hardest not to laugh, his hands clasped together in front of his lips to stifle his giggles as the tall blond boy he had known for years just looked at him desperately.

“It’s not funny,” Tsukishima’s lips formed into a frown (almost a pout), looking away from his friend nervously. His fingers played with some chopsticks, poking at his uneaten lunch.

Yamaguchi had never see Tsukishima Kei nervous. Volleyball games? Totally calm. Math class? Easy. Exam season? Piece of cake.

But put Tsukishima near a girl? No, scratch that. Not just any girl. Put Tsukishima near Y/N? It was all over for him. Suddenly, this 190cm tall boy wanted to shrink small enough to run away and not be noticed.

“It’s a little funny, Tsukki,” Yamaguchi insisted, finally letting out just a tiny chuckle that he just couldn’t hold back. “I think you’re overreacting. Just a bit.”

Tsukishima’s eyes turned back to the other boy, staring at him as if analyzing him, “How could I be overreacting? I’m telling you, I’m allergic!”

Yamaguchi was really trying his best to be supportive, knowing that talking about things was already hard for Tsukishima, especially when involving a particularly cute girl. “You think... you’re allergic... to Y/N,” Yamaguchi retorted slowly, repeating how Tsukishima started this convo with.

“Don’t be an idiot,” Tsukishima scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Obviously it’s some product she uses or something,” his nose scrunched up slightly as he tried to think of what it could possibly be. “Like that hand lotion she uses. The one that smells like vanilla and brown sugar,” Tsukishima proclaimed, nodding to himself like he had solved the mystery.

The green haired boy was still trying his best to be supportive. He nodded slowly, giving a forced smile to his best friend as he slowly spiralled into insanity. He had never seen Tsukishima this desperate for answers before. “Hasn’t she let you use some of that hand lotion?” He wondered aloud, remembering very specifically how red Tsukishima’s ears got when she rubbed a bit into a rash he had gotten on his hand.

“Gotta take good care of your hands if you play volleyball, Tsukishima-san!” Y/N had beamed, her fingers massaging the cream in.

Tsukishima had practically fainted that day, though he’d never admit it.

The blond’s frown tightened, holding his hand to his chin in thought, “Right. So not the hand lotion then.”

“Maybe she got a new perfume?” Yamaguchi offered, nibbling on some of his lunch while Tsukishima thought it out.

“No, she’s still using the same one,” He mumbled, and Yamaguchi smirked to himself, knowing that Tsukishima would’ve never admitted before that he knew little details like this about her. 

“Well. what kinds of symptoms do you have? Maybe that’ll narrow it down,” Yamaguchi suggested, leaning his head back on the wall behind them. It wasn’t unusual for Tsukishima to want to eat some place quiet, but today had been the first day that he had practically dragged Yamaguchi to this small secluded spot behind the school. The two of them sat against a wall to eat, though Tsukishima’s lunch had been completely forgotten.

“I just-” Tsukishima hesitated, eyebrows furrowing in annoyance as he tried to word how his body felt every time she was around. “I always feel so lightheaded. And my heartbeat’s always irregular too. Sometimes it feels like I can’t breathe properly.” His hand slid into his jacket pocket, pulling out his phone and tilting the screen towards Yamaguchi to show him a medical diagnostic page on the web. “Some people say these are symptoms of allergies. Or an anxiety attack. But I’m leaning more towards allergies.”

Yamaguchi squinted at the text, “You... Googled it?” He asked, a playful smile on his lips, glancing up at Tsukishima, amused.

“Well, what else am I supposed to do?” Tsukishima scoffed, scrolling through the page. “I don’t know what else it could be. It’s not with anyone else. It can’t be the classroom either, cause when she’s not around, I don’t feel anything.”

“Hm. So what’re you going to do about it?” Yamaguchi asked, going along with this ‘allergic’ idea as much as he could. He knew Tsukishima was very rational and even if he suggested what he figured was happening, Tsukishima would never listen.

“D-Do?” Tsukishima blinked. He hadn’t thought about what the next step was.

“Well I assume you don’t want to keep feeling that like right? You could always ask the teacher to move you, I suppose. Then ask her not to attend any of our games. Avoiding her for the rest of your life seems like the best choice doesn’t it?” Yamaguchi asked innocently, closing up his lunch box and taking a sip from his juice.

Tsukishima stayed quiet, eyebrows still furrowed and the frown on his face tightening. He knew that made sense - one of the girls in their class was allergic to nuts and she always had to be careful what she ate, and he had even heard of some people not eating or drinking milk products because of allergies. The logical part of his brain agreed with Yamaguchi, perhaps staying away from Y/N was the only answer.

“Then... maybe it’s not an allergy,” Tsukishima mumbled quietly. He hated going back on his word but he couldn’t deny that he loathed the idea of not seeing Y/N’s smile ever again. Or seeing her sit with someone else. “Maybe it’s just something I have to get used to.”

“You know, Tsukishima,” Yamaguchi started again, looking off to the scenery that was in front of them. His voice was light and airy as he tried to coax his friend to the idea, “What you’re going through sounds a lot like-”

Tsukishima could hear it in his voice, he knew the next word forming from Yamaguchi’s lips before it even entered the air. He slammed his lunch box closed and stood up abruptly, turning away from the other boy’s eyes. “Lunch is over,” he grumbled, as if that was the reason he stood up so dramatically.

Yamaguchi smirked and packed up his things, shaking his head slowly when Tsukishima wasn’t looking. He wasn’t at all surprised that Tsukishima was having a hard time accepting his feelings.

The word hung in the very serious boy’s mind for the rest of the day. He tried not to focus so much on Y/N as he sat next to her for the rest of their classes, tried to not inhale too much or look in her general direction, in fear that his “allergy” would act up again.

He was almost positive it wasn’t... that. He would know for sure if it was, wouldn’t he? His nose scrunched slightly as he thought about the music he had listened to before, ones that had just a good melody and beat and he definitely didn’t listen to because of the lyrics since they were about... that thing.

Didn’t some people talk about their heart feeling like it was going to fall out of their chest? That they found it hard to breathe? That it was like all life stopped when they saw that person? And that despite all this, they never wanted to be without them?

Tsukishima had to get to the bottom of this. He was either experiencing some sort of allergic reaction to her or he was experiencing feelings. He thought about ignoring them, pretending like they didn’t exist so that maybe everything would go back to normal one day. But how long would that take? Wouldn’t it just be easier to rip off the bandaid and find out now?

At the end of class, Tsukishima zoomed his way out of class, not waiting for Yamaguchi like usual.

“Is he alright, Yamaguchi-san?” Y/N asked, surprised that the two best friends weren’t walking out together like they had every other day. Some days, they would even walk out with Y/N on their way to practice. But apparently, not today.

“He’s got a lot on his mind,” Yamaguchi explained, waving it away with a smile. Perhaps today he would be walking home by himself. And that was fine by him.

Y/N packed up her things and waved goodbye to her other classmates, heading out the door and slipping in her headphones. Her mind drifted to all the things she had to do when she got home, whether or not there were leftovers to heat up today or if she should cook something up.

“You take so long,” a drawl voice interrupted the very beginning of her first song. She blinked in surprise, looking to her right where Tsukishima was leaning against a tree.

Y/N pulled out one earbud, tilting her head as she watched him. It wasn’t like she hadn’t seen him do this casual, I-don’t-care-about-anything lean, with his headphones around his neck and his hands shoved in his pockets. But there was something different about him this time. Why was he avoiding her eyes? Why was he not giving her an annoyingly carefree smile? Why were his ears turning pink?

“Were you... waiting for me, Tsukishima-san?” Y/N asked slowly. He didn’t move for a moment, as if still calculating something in that big brain of his. He pushed off of the tree after sighing, walking over to her slowly.

“Obviously,” was all he said, glaring down at her as if she should’ve known this.

“You rushed out of class so quick, I thought you were already going home,” Y/N responded, still a bit confused. “Don’t you and Yamaguchi normally walk home together?”

Why did she have to question so much? Why couldn’t she just realize what he was trying to do? Tsukishima huffed and grabbed her hand, dropping a nice cool juice box in it. His eyes darted away from her next inquisitive look, but glanced back almost immediately because he wanted to see her eyes widen just a little at her favourite juice box.

“W-What is this?” Y/N asked, holding it in her hands. Part of her wanted to examine it to make sure he hadn’t somehow tricked her into holding something that wasn’t actually juice. She looked up at him suspiciously - Tsukishima knew her favourite juice?

“You didn’t have one with you today. I figured you forgot your wallet again today,” Tsukishima mumbled, shoving his hands in his jacket again.

“O-Oh. I did, thank you. Um,” Y/N hesitated. Was Tsukishima trying... to be nice? “Why... why did you buy it for me?”

“I just said why,” Tsukishima scoffed, flicking her head gently. He scolded himself internally, feeling guilty as soon as she showed the surprise on her face. She’s asking why you thought to be nice, Kei, stop being snarky, he told himself harshly. “Sorry,” he muttered quickly, feeling almost immediately bad for flicking her.

Y/N just laughed though, giggles spilling from her lips as she looked up at him, “Are you feeling okay, Tsukishima-san? You’re turning red,” she teased gently and he looked away from her quickly, hating how quickly his face heated up.

He took a breath, trying to mimic how calm he was on the court. He turned back to look at her with a cocky smile and confidence gaze, though he was sure she could tell he was nervous, “I’m fine, Y/N-san. But I need to tell you something. And I’m only going to say it once so listen up.”

Y/N watched him intently, noting the fake confidence he was trying to put on. She nodded as he looked at her for any sign to keep going.

His lips opened for a moment and Y/N could’ve sworn there was a moment of panic in his eyes when nothing came out. “I’m going to walk you home today,” Tsukishima stated finally, each word thudding into the air. He felt his confidence falter as the wrong words left his mouth, shifting his bag on his shoulder and starting to walk ahead.

Y/N’s eyebrows furrowed, feeling her confusion only rise. Did he really build up that whole thing... just to walk her home?

“Hurry up or I’ll leave you here,” Tsukishima called behind his shoulder, still walking ahead. He was internally punching himself, groaning and uttering insults at his own stupid self. Couldn’t even say it. Couldn’t just say Y/N I like you and I think I’m either allergic to you or I’m utterly in love with you but I’ve been told I suck at explaining how I feel and that I never say the right things at the right time so please just reject me so I can move away from these exhausting feelings.

“Want some?” Y/N’s gentle voice was suddenly beside him, and Tsukishima felt his stomach doing that flipping motion again. He glanced down at her and saw her holding up the juice box at him. “Seems only fair, since you bought it,” she explained, the glimmer in her eyes making him feel way too warm inside.

“Sure,” he mumbled after a moment. She smiled just a little bit wider, holding up the juice to him, expecting him to just snatch it away and drink. But no, Tsukishima being a little bitch and deciding that if he couldn’t admit anything with words, he could try with actions, leaned down slightly, and latched his lips onto the straw. His hand wrapped around hers over the juice box, holding it still as he took a sip.

Y/N felt like she was suddenly bright red, her heart possibly having exploded right then and there. His eyes looked up to meet hers as he sipped, smirking a bit as he noticed the panicked and flushed look in her eyes.

Maybe the feeling is... mutual?

“Mm,” he hummed, pulling away after keeping her gaze for a second. “I guess I can see why you like it.”

Y/N had shivers running up and down her spine, feeling like Tsukishima had looked into her very soul and knew about her year-long crush on him.

The two of them started walking a bit slower after that, and to the external eye, you’d probably just see two classmates walking home together. But look a little closer, and you’d see both of them having internal conflicts. They managed to walk through the small roads filled with shops and make it about halfway to Y/N’s house in complete silence. 

“Y/N-san,” Tsukishima finally ended it, the agonizing silence, in which he had been racking his brain trying to think of how to start a conversation. He stopped in his tracks as he spoke the one word, the two of them now on a quieter dirt path. There was no one to interrupt them, no one to save Tsukishima from embarrassment, no Yamaguchi to fill the awkward silence.

“Hm?” Y/N looked back at him, noticing him just standing there. “Are you alright, Tsukishima-san?”

“There’s something I need to say,” he started, his hands in his pockets clenched into fists.

“O-Oh okay.”

“I’ve been... feeling sick around you.” Baka, he scolded himself for what felt like the millionth time. That definitely wasn’t the way he had wanted to say it. “I-I mean, not like sick sick but like allergy sick,” he tried to recover, but scoffed at himself since that wasn’t all that much better.

Y/N’s eyebrows furrowed in response, trying to think about his reactions lately. He had definitely been more flushed lately, but she always thought that was annoyance. He’d been quieter and more distant, but it was Tsukishima after all. He looked over to her desperately, hoping to see that she was understanding what he was trying to say. She wasn’t. 

Tsukishima was starting to get frustrated. He knew he wasn’t the greatest at communicating but how hard was it to see how much he liked her? Yamaguchi saw it, hell, even his upperclassmen teased him about it when they first saw Tsukishima and Y/N walking out of class together one day. So why did other people who didn’t need to know it, why did they understand but she didn’t? Why was she so dense? 

You’re not saying anything, his mind reminded him as he scowled to himself.

“It has to be that,” Tsukishima finally continued quietly, his eyes now staring at his feet. He was practically trying to convince himself now. It had to be that there was a health related issue with him being around her. It had to be that, because if it wasn’t, it meant that Tsukishima had to tell her how he felt. And that meant that he was probably going to end up hurt. Why a girl like Y/N hung around a guy like him anyways was beyond him. 

“Why?” Y/N frowned, still terribly lost in the cosmos of this odd confession. “Why would it have to be that?”

“Because if it isn’t that, then it means that I’ve fallen completely head over heels for you.”

Tsukishima wasn’t sure how he had managed to say the words. But there it was. His fists tightened even more, his fingernails digging into his palm so hard it was starting to hurt. 

His eyes closed tightly, turning his head away from her. He didn’t want to look. He didn’t want to see laughter or disgust in her eyes. Maybe he could take it back now. Maybe he could-

Tsukishima jumped at the feeling of a poke on his chest, his eyes opening in surprise when he found Y/N standing much closer than she was earlier. “Are you teasing me?” She asked defensively, squinting her eyes up at him.

“T-Teasing?” Tsukishima stammered. He watched her eyes, noting how visibly upset she looked and he could feel his frustration rising. He had finally said what he had wanted to say this whole time... and she wasn’t even reacting the way she was supposed to. How stupid did she have to be? And why did she have to look so damn cute while doing it?

“Yamaguchi-san told you, didn’t he? I knew that poophead couldn’t keep his mouth shut,” she grumbled, crossing her arms against her chest. “He swore he wouldn’t tell you, but I should’ve known. You guys are best friends and all.”

“Told me... told me what?”

“That I’ve liked you practically since we met,” Y/N huffed, putting her hands on her hips. “Listen, Tsukishima-san, if you don’t like me back, you don’t have to tease me like this. I’m perfectly fine being rejected,” she told him with a pout on her lips (she was definitely not fine being rejected, and was planning on crying at home after this). “Don’t act like you didn’t know.”

Tsukishima‘s eyes widened, staring at her like she had grown a second head. “You... You like me?” He gulped. His allergies must be getting worse, his heart was thumping so hard against his chest, he couldn’t think straight.

Y/N and him shared a confused look for a moment, neither one of them sure who was teasing whom at this point. “Didn’t... didn’t you know? That’s why you’re being nice to me?” She asked him, poking his chest again. “Why else would you be walking me home and buying me juice?”

“Why would...” Tsukishima’s lips curled into a smile and suddenly he burst out into laughter, tilting his head back in amusement. 

“Why are you laughing?” Y/N whined, punching his arm lightly with a huff. “This isn’t a time to be laughing at me!”

Tsukishima straightened up with his signature cocky smile, shaking his head as he fixed his glasses on his face. Then, his hand moved to hit the top of her head.

“OW! Tsukishima-san!”

“You idiot. Why would I be standing here confessing to you if I was just going to make fun of you?” Tsukishima scoffed, smirking at her. “If I didn’t like you back and I found out you liked me, don’t you think I would’ve made it clear by now that you never stood a chance?”

Y/N thought about this for a moment, remembering that one time a girl in a different class had confessed to him after attending one of his matches.

“I think you’re incredible, Tsukishima-san! A-And I just.... well I just...”

“Are you trying to confess to me?” Tsukishima didn’t even bother looking up from his study book, finishing an equation before even glancing at her. “You should just give up now. I’m not interested.”

The girl had teared up so much, even Y/N had felt bad (even though she was secretly happy that Tsukishima hadn’t accepted the confession). Yamaguchi had yelled at Tsukishima about being gentle that day.

“Why would I be nice to someone stupid enough to think I’d like them? I didn’t give her any hints that I did, I don’t even know her,” Tsukishima grumbled.

Y/N had internalized those words, deciding she wouldn’t confess her feelings to Tsukishima ever. If she did, and Tsukishima rejected her, he probably wouldn’t want to be around her as friends ever again.

“So...” Y/N thought to herself for a moment, trying to reexamine what had happened today. “What was with the juice box then?” She asked him. 

“I thought...” Tsukishima frowned a little, looking up at the sky in thought. “I thought when you confess you were supposed to... give a gift or something.”

Y/N couldn’t help but giggle at his thought process and Tsukishima glared at her slightly. “You’re laughing at me now?”

She shook her head quickly, trying to stifle her giggles, “I just... I think it’s sweet,” she beamed, holding onto her little juice box even though it was empty now.

Tsukishima watched her carefully before smiling a little, patting her head gently, “Alright then, let’s get you home. I’ll bring another juice box for you for our date.”

“D-Date?” Y/N repeated shyly, following him as he started to walk again.

“You thought I’d just confess to you and not ask you out? Idiot,” Tsukishima smirked, feeling such an intense relief on his shoulders. His heart was still beating furiously and his stomach felt like it was going to come up his throat, but... it wasn’t as frustrating of a feeling now. 

After he dropped her off at her house with the promise of walking her to school tomorrow morning, Tsukishima couldn’t help but allow himself to smile widely the whole way home. 

If this is what an allergy felt like, he never wanted it to stop.

** ** ** ** ** ** ** **

Okay like I mentioned up there in the Author’s Notes, this is my first time writing for Haikyuu so lmk what you thought :) I’ve written some stuff for OHSHC and I think it’s pretty obviously that tall jerks with glasses are my type lol 

Anyways! Enjoy!

[theelvenhaven]

Elves Taking Care of You When You’re Sick

Fëanorians

A/N: I’m sick so I am surprising you guys with some sick comfort headcanons with our favorite murder family, also inspired by @saviorsong​ who has so kindly assisted somehow in taking care of me despite living on the opposite end of the US. Yes I broke bed rest, and yes I am going back to bed... after this post. 

* * * 

Fëanor 

Fëanor is very thorough in taking care of you when you are sick and in true Fëanor fashion asks you lots of questions about what it is you’re experiencing as your symptoms. At first when you’re sick, Feanor is absent. Not because he doesn’t care, but because he cares a lot and is taking the time to read up on herbs, teas and tonics and talking plenty with the Healers discussing what will best for your care. 

Feanor brings you tonics/syrups and teas to help soothe your sore throat or upset stomach. He makes sure that you take or drink all of it no matter how horrible it might taste and will gently chastise you if you don’t listen to him. Feanor absolutely holds the promise of cuddles over you to make sure you take everything. 

He also makes sure that you stay very hydrated and that you stay put in bed to rest. You can read or draw or write if you want, but by no means are you to leave the bed. Feanor will just corral you right back to bed if he catches you up for any reason that isn’t the bathroom or fresh pajamas.  

Maedhros

When you get sick, Maedhros immediately jumps into taking care of you. Though he can’t physically be there the whole time considering all the duties and tasks that are expected of him. Though he is there at the initial diagnosis when the Healers are first called to get an idea of just how severe your illness is. 

Even though it isn’t terribly severe, he insists a Healer stays with you when he isn’t present knowing he could be gone long periods of time in between medication and eating. He tries to keep his tasks and duties as short as he can because all he can think about is you being sick and laid up. 

Maedhros is always stopping by to check on you in between duties no matter how long or short. He rubs your back soothingly, cuddles you and asks repeatedly how you are feeling as he worries things could get worse for you. Maedhros absolutely insists firmly that you stay in bed and only move when necessary. A week after you improve from being sick, Maedhros still takes time to check in on you and make doubly sure that you are doing well and are healthy.

Maglor

Maglor is a stellar nurse when it comes to taking care of you and is happy to comfort you however you are needing it. Admittedly Maglor panics a little bit, knowing that human sicknesses can literally kill you. He’s very quick to have the Healers check on you as soon as you start showing signs and symptoms of being sick.

He follows their suggestions for medication and care to a tee while also finding ways to comfort you. This includes cuddling with you when your fevers break, rubbing your back even if you are vomiting and brushing any hair out of the way. 

Maglor makes sure that windows are open if you’re too hot, or your blankets are all cozy and warm should you be too cold. As you start to get better and your symptoms start to improve does Maglor finally take a deep sigh of relief that it really was just something minor. 

Celegorm

Celegorm looks completely calm, cool and collected as soon as you mention to him that you are sick. Internally though he is panicking at the idea of you being sick because he knows it can be severe and fatal since you are human. Celegorm definitely makes the executive decision though to take the time to leave his comfortable cabin in the woods to bring you to Curufin’s realm to make sure you are cared for. 

He casually chalks it up to you that he knows you’re sick and that he’s not the best healer. Which is true, but he is also doing it because he is nervous just how bad it could be. Celegorm takes an internal sigh of relief when the healers conclude it is a mild sickness and you’ll recover just fine. 

In the meantime he casually spends his time with you, occasionally disappearing before magically medicine appears that he has no idea how it got there. He also makes sure your favorite sick comfort food is cooked for you. Celegorm also believes that laughter is the best medicine and does what he can to make you smile and laugh while lazily lounging with you. Making no mentions of going hunting or out for long walks without you. 

Caranthir

Caranthir has many dealings with humans and the other races of Beleriand, so when you end up sick, it comes as no surprise to him. You are human after all and it was inevitable. He had been previously preparing for this moment, stocking up on medication for the variety of ailments that may afflict you for the season. 

He for the most part keeps the Healers out of it if your symptoms aren’t very severe. A low grade fever and a cough aren’t enough to raise any alarm bells no matter how much he hates seeing you sick. Caranthir does his best to take off from his duties, but mostly works from your shared chambers if he has too. He worries that your symptoms could get way worse if he’s gone and he wants for you to feel comforted during such an uncomfortable and unpleasant time. 

Caranthir also takes the time to cook you soup himself. He had heard through the grape vines that it’s such a big comfort staple amongst humans, while you’re sleeping he sneaks off to accomplish the task before surprising you with your comfort soup. 

Curufin

Having some experience of being around humans like Caranthir, Curufin absolutely anticipated that you would end up sick eventually. Curufin absolutely hates that you are sick and openly shows it, frowning at all your coughing or vomiting. But he is there as much as he can be to take care of you. 

Curufin will ask what all of your symptoms are and relay them to a Healer for whatever medication that might alleviate them. He absolutely insists that no one but him or a healer- and Celebrimbor- bother you as you are resting. He hens over your condition, making sure you are hydrated, that you take medication, that you’ve eaten even if it is just broth. 

He will absolutely chastise you if you give him a hard time about doing any of the above. He won’t humiliate you by any means Curufin just wants to make sure that you are doing what you can to take care of yourself. And if you can’t he insists on doing it for you. 

Amrod

Having the experience and gift of a healer, when you get sick you are absolutely in good hands when it comes to Amrod. He certainly would’ve picked up the trade of human remedies for when they get sick, especially being with you. 

Amrod makes you herbal teas or syrups that would help with your cough and break up congestion. Being the one as well to administer it every time, knowing that if you feel achy and chilled it’s going to be harder for you to do it yourself. He’s very patient and if it’s an unpleasant tasting syrup he’s sure to bring you something to chase it down with. 

Amrod places cool rags on your head to help break your fever and sits patiently at your bedside to keep you company. Even if it is just a common cold he is extremely attentive to your needs. Should you want it as well, Amrod is happy to climb into bed and hold you close, letting you sleep on him or just next to him. Amrod is happy to take the time to help keep you comfortable. 

Amras

Amras fully takes advantage of the fact that you’re sick to be extra loving- if you let him of course. Considering Amrod has the talent for healing, he consults with his brother about your condition, to which Amrod whips up whatever is necessary to fast track your healing. 

In the meantime, Amras fully uses this opportunity to let you get in as many cuddles as you could possibly desire from him. The beauty of him being an elf is he won’t catch what you have. He holds you close to his chest, rubbing your back. Amras presses many kisses to the top of your head, and is constantly asking if you need anything.

Too hot? He will open the windows to let in cool air. Too cold? He will be happy to hunker down with you under the blankets. Got a bad cough? He is happy to ask Amrod for a cough suppressant while keeping you really hydrated. Too overwhelmed? Amras is happy to give you the space you need. 

Celebrimbor

Like father like son, Celebrimbor is a hen when it comes to you and being sick. He automatically worries that it could be the worst and is quick to take any time off that he can to make sure that you are well taken care of. Fever, chills, and cough are all the symptoms he needs to do so. 

He sends for a Healer to have them look you over, and while they give him a diagnosis that isn’t severe Celebrimbor can’t bring himself to part from you until you are better. He takes the time to draw you warm baths when you have the chills, sitting at the tub side rubbing your back soothingly. 

He reads to you when you are laid up in bed, with you cuddled up into his chest until you fall asleep. Makes sure that you have water at the bedside, and medicine for whatever is ailing you. Celebrimbor makes sure that neither of you are disturbed unless it is by a healer. By the time you are better he still insists that you see a Healer once or twice to make sure that you are in fact okay. 

* * *

tags: @saviorsong​ @lilmelily​ @dicksoutformtl​ @fandomhoe101​ @icarus-fell-in-spring​ @someoneinthestars​ @red-riding​ @miriel-estelwen​ @ta-ka-shi-ma​ @nerdyely @thegirlwithoutaname87​ @anunexpectedsideblog​ @achasiel​

[widowsistersandfriends]

Hello! I love your writing! I would like to request a Wanda and reader fic where Wanda asks if they’re ticklish and reader has actually never been tickled before so Wanda pins down and tickles them and discovers that they’re extremely ticklish! Also maybe something where like the reader snorts when they laugh and Wanda keeps tickling them because she thinks being ticklish and reader snorts is funny and cute. I really relate to this because I snort when I get tickled and I’m super ticklish 😂

Hello anon! Thank you for this wonderful request!! It was so cute and fun to write! Hope you enjoy!!

Word Count: 1155

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It was a relaxing afternoon, and you had just recovered from a cold. Wanda had been taking care of you, helping remind you to take your medicine as well as making sure you were eating and staying hydrated. Today you were feeling much better, and were definitely over any symptoms. However, you loved when Wanda took care of you and gave you her undivided attention, so you kept the act up a little longer.

The two of you were sitting on the couch, watching TV, when you decided to snuggle up with her.

“Hey Y/N, how are you feeling?” The witch asked.

“I still don’t feel 100%, but it would make me feel a lot better if we snuggled together,” you reply, trying to make yourself still sound sick. However, Wanda raised an eyebrow at you, as she suspected something was off.

Wanda agreed anyway, as she would snuggle with you even if you weren’t sick.

After a few minutes, you let out a fake cough to make your story more believable. However, this just confirmed the witch’s suspicions, as she now knew that you were just faking so she would give you more attention.

Wanda now noticed that you were about to fall asleep, but she was feeling mischievous. Her hand slowly went towards your side, as she lightly wiggled one finger against your side.

You jumped and were startled awake, turning with wide eyes towards Wanda.

“What was that for?!?” You cried.

“Y/N, are you ticklish?” Wanda asked, with a slight smirk growing on her face.

“Um, well I’ve actually never been tickled before…” you answered.

“Oh really? Well, then we’ll have to fix that then. We won’t be able to tell if you’re ticklish or not if I don’t tickle you,” Wanda said, as she now held you down with her powers.

“Woah woah, wait. What are you doing?” You asked, now feeling a bit nervous.

“Just finding out the answer to my question!” Wanda replied cheerfully, as she began to lightly knead your hips.

“Wahahanda whahahat ahahare you dohihing,” you giggle out.”

“Looks like someone’s a little bit ticklish, aren’t you?” Wanda teased, as she then began to wiggle her fingers into your stomach.

“AHAHAHAHA STAHAHAHAP IHIHIHIT,” you laugh out, unable to control your reactions.

“Why would I stop when you’re so cute and adorable?” Wanda asked, as you just responded with more loud laughter.

“Now that I know you’re ticklish, I need to find your most ticklish spot,” Wanda commented.

Your eyes widened with fear, as your hips and stomach were already pretty ticklish. You didn’t know if you could handle anything more.

“No you don’t Wanda! There’s no point!” You protest.

“But I actually do need to know so I can torment you every day,” Wanda said back sarcastically.

Wanda then wiggled her fingers above your armpits, as you tried to pull your arms.

“Don’t even try, Y/N. You know you’re stuck there as long as my powers are still here,” Wanda teased, before digging into your armpits.

“NOHOHOHOHOHO STAHAHAHAHAP PLEHEHEHASE,” you scream out, not knowing that the sensations could get worse than before.

“Oooh, I found a good spot,” Wanda remarked.

You just continued to laugh hysterically, unable to produce a response.

“Hmm, where should I try next?” Wanda questioned, giving you a small break.

“You’re not done?!?” You cry out of fear.

“Oh no, Y/N. I still feel like I haven’t found your most ticklish spot yet,” the witch responded.

Her hands then latched onto your ribs, but didn’t start tickling you yet. You let out a shriek and immediately began giggling.

“Nohohoho stohohohp nohohoht thehehehre,” you giggled.

Wanda just grinned evilly, knowing that she was going to have a field day with this.

She then began to drill her fingers between your ribs, as you snorted before falling into a mix of squeals and shrieks.

“QUIHIHIT IHIHIHT YOUOUO JEHEHERK,” you scream out.

“Oh my god, Y/N, that is so cute. You snort when your ribs get tickled,” Wanda cooed.

“STAHAHAHAP PLEHEHEHEASE NOHOHOHO MOHOHOHRE,” you cry out, as your laughter then went silent.

“Where did your laughter go? I want to hear that snort again,” Wanda teased as she then stopped tickling you. However, after a short period of time, she began to squeeze your upper ribs again, catching you off guard.

*snort* “AHAHAHAHAHA NOHOHOHO I GIHIHIVE MEHEHEHRCY,” you scream out.

“Ah, there it is,” Wanda commented.

“You’re such a jerk,” you reply back.

“Hey, don’t even start with me. Consider this your punishment for faking sick for more attention,” Wanda said.

“You knew?!?” You asked in disbelief.

“Of course I knew, Y/N. Your acting skills are terrible,” Wanda replied with a chuckle.

“Well, even if they are terrible, I still succeeded right? I still ended up getting your attention?” You ask cheekily.

Wanda just responded by grabbing your ankle and wiggling her nails across your sole.

“Nohohoho stohohohp ihihi’m sohohory,” you giggle, desperately trying to pull your foot away.

“If you behave, then maybe I’ll give you extra attention through snuggles. If you don’t behave, your extra attention will be through tickles. Also, I now know that you’re ticklish and your most ticklish spot, so don’t even think about lying,” Wanda threatened.

Your cheeks went red, as you blushed from embarrassment. However, you couldn’t help but smile, as you knew that from now on, you were going to ask for extra attention by being a sassy and snarky brat.

After a moment of silence, you spoke up. “Wanda, are you ticklish?”

The witch’s eyes widened for a split second, and you were quick enough to catch it.

“Of course not, Y/N. Witches aren’t ticklish,” Wanda replied with a fond eye roll.

“Really?” You question, before tackling her onto the couch and digging into her sides.

“NOHOHOHO, Y/N STAHAHAHAP,” the witch cried out.

“Hmm, it looks like witches are liars,” you commented thoughtfully, before kneading into her hips aggressively.

“NOHOHOHO ANYWHERE BUHUHUT THEHEHERE,” Wanda screamed, as she bucked against you.

“Ooh, looks like I broke your record for most tries on finding your ticklish spot. I only needed two guesses, and you’re already a mess,” you teased, as the witch blushed.

“IHIHIM SOHOHORY PLEHEHEASE,” Wanda cried out, as you finally let her go.

“Ha, look at you. You begged for mercy after like two seconds,” you snarked.

“Yeah, well at least I don’t snort,” Wanda retorted, as she grabbed your ribs with both of her hands, causing you to yet again snort with laughter and push her away.

“Ohohkay truhuce!” You cry out.

“Y/N, there’s no such thing as a truce. Just know you’re gonna get wrecked for what you just did to me,” Wanda warned.

“I can’t take you seriously when you were just a giggling mess a few seconds ago,” you reply back, taking off running as you knew you were definitely in big trouble now.

[flareish]

Anxiety

kuroo x reader

summary: you hide your anxiety from basically everyone including your boyfriend, until he finds out for himself

genre: hurt/comfort

warnings: Emetophobia Warning! description of nausea/vomit, anxiety, bit of angst but ends in fluff

word count: 2.0k

a/n: I tried to make this as close to my anxiety since I hadn’t known anyone with my kind of anxiety(symptom wise) until I was seventeen, which was a good ways into when I realized I had anxiety. So here is some nausea anxiety representation!

masterlist

You tap your fingers in a mindless rhythm. Alternating the fingers and repeating them back and forth, trying to make it a game, a challenge. You did this over and over again to distract yourself from that all too familiar sinking feeling. That feeling like your stomach has managed to twist and knot itself a million times. Each bump of the bus made acid crawl up your throat. You crunched a mint in your mouth hoping the peppermint would soothe some of the nausea. It didn’t, but the thought was there. You just will yourself not to throw up on the bus, anything but that. The thought in itself makes you even more nervous, and in turn even sicker.

You don’t even know why you are anxious. Today is Kuroo’s big game, but it isn’t yours. You’ve been to a hundred of his games before but never before did you feel like this. Normally you get cute little butterflies, not an angry swarm of bees. The worst part is, there is Kuroo sat next to you happy as can be, completely oblivious. He keeps trying to drag you into conversations but you fear if you open your mouth for too long, all that will come up is vomit. So you keep your mouth firmly closed only smiling tightly or shaking your head at his prompts.

It's not exactly his fault though. He doesn’t actually know you have anxiety. It’s not something you really like to talk about. You are all for promoting the acceptance of mental health but you just find every time you tell someone the dynamic changes. Either they flat out don’t believe you since you “don’t seem like the type with anxiety”. Well duh, I don’t have social anxiety, I have situational anxiety. Like here in this situation. That or they suddenly treat me like I am incapable of handling myself. That whenever a slightly stressful event comes up, I am going to melt into a puddle of pure anxiety. Sorry but I’ve made it this far, I may have to throw up a few times on the way but I am still making it. 

So you just haven’t told Kuroo. You're just nervous that it will change the dynamic. You also don’t want to steal his spotlight. Today is supposed to be all about him. It's his big game. To suddenly speak up and tell him that his game is giving you anxiety would be selfish. So like you always have, you put a brave face on and face it head-on.

“Hey, are you okay?” Kuroo asks you, now facing you, “You look a little pale.”

“Hmm?,” You also turn to look at him, “Oh I am just a bit tired that’s all. I will be fine in an hour or so.” You hope at least. He nods relieved it's not something worse. 

You finally pull into the stadium and everyone is pushing their way off the bus. Luckily Kuroo is right by you to make sure you don't get accidentally pushed down the bus stairs and trampled. The team makes it’s to the bulletin board where they are given their matchups. Nekoma is paired with a pretty hard team. Suddenly, out of nowhere, you dry heave. You knew at the point you were going to throw up and within the next few minutes. 

“Hey I think I left something in the bus I’ll be right back.” You say to Kuroo before dashing off. He goes to reply but you are already gone. 

You make it around the back of the building before you throw up. At this point you’re kinda out of it, your mind is occupied on emptying your already empty stomach. Then you feel someone pull your hair back and gently rub your back. You don’t even have to look up to know it’s Kuroo. When you finish he hands you his water bottle.  You waterfall it and rinse your mouth out of that acidic taste. 

“What’s going on are you okay?” Kuroo asks full of concern. You hesitate for a moment, thinking of telling the truth. Then you remember this is supposed to be his day. 

“Sorry I must have caught a stomach bug.” He doesn’t completely buy it so you quickly add to it.

“I didn't feel great on the bus but I just thought it was because I was tired.” You feel bad lying, “I also don’t want to distract you before your game.” At that Kuroo quickly pulls you into a hug, “Your not a distraction, I just want to make sure you’re okay.” Your cheek is pressed against his chest and your hands grip the front of his shirt. 

“We should probably head back.” You mumble.

“Yeah.” He leans down to kiss you but you duck away. He looks incredibly offended and hurt at this.

“Dude I just threw up I don’t know if you want to do that.” 

“…Point.”

The two of you head back inside to the team, you feeling much better after throwing up. Before you know it, the competition has begun and Nekoma has won. You run down and celebrate with the team and it’s a happy day.

On the bus ride home Kuroo has a strange energy about him. Not like he’s mad more just like he’s just realized something. You nudge him and smile hoping to break him out of his little funk. He immediately smiles back and goes back to celebrating with the team. His reaction was almost like putting a mask on. You watch him for a moment before slipping into a conversation of your own.

When you make it back to school you go your separate ways. Him going to shower, and you to get home before it gets too late. A big hug before pushing away. You still refusing to kiss him after throwing up earlier in the day. 

You are laying on your bed, exhausted. Anxiety really takes a toll on your energy. Your thoughts are broken when your phone chimes with a text.  Leaning over to grab your phone off your bedside table you see it is from Kuroo. 

“Can you come over? I want to talk.”

No cute pet names. No slowly easing into it. Actually using proper grammar. Nothing in that message was a good sign. Just “I want to talk” was enough to make the acid begin to crawl again. You knew it had to be about today. Especially after you saw him zoning out on the bus. It had to be your anxiety episode. You knew he wouldn’t be happy you lied but going to this extent. Like he just found out you have anxiety and this is what he hits you with? The world’s most nerve-wracking text message. The only worse place than this would be “we need to talk”. That’s when you have really screwed up. So maybe you’ve only minorly screwed up since he said want not need. Does that mean you have the choice to say no? That was kind of tempting but you knew you would be tossing and turning all night thinking about what might be wrong. 

“Okay.” You reply to the text. Short and sweet. Putting on some shoes and grabbing a hoodie, you quietly slip out of your house. Kuroo’s house wasn’t too far but it was far enough. Enough to continue to stir in your intrusive and unstoppable thoughts. You eventually make it to his house and head in going straight for his room. Before you reach the door you hesitate and gather yourself. Preparing for whatever was about to come. 

When you go in you find Kuroo sat on the floor of his bedroom, back pressed against the bed. He jerkily looks up and you and gives you a tight smile. None of this is giving good signs. Something is very heavy on his mind. You sit down across from him, your back against the wall your feet almost touching. 

“So what was it you wanting to talk about.” You break the silence. He doesn’t respond for a moment. Just as you are about to try again he speaks up.

“Do you still love me?” Your face drops into confusion.

“Why wouldn’t I love you anymore?” You ask, suddenly realizing this wasn’t the conversation you were prepping yourself for. 

“You’ve been distant lately. You don’t tell me things like when you don’t feel good. I thought about it when I got home and I was wondering if you weren’t actually sick but just making the excuse because you got caught.” He’s very serious at the moment and his words hold a cold edge. 

“What do you mean get caught?” You match his tone. You weren’t planning on fighting but something about how he said it just set something off in you.

“You didn’t want to be there. Ever since this morning you were quiet and reserved. Even after the game, you wouldn’t even kiss me-”

“Yeah, cause I threw up! And how could I be faking it when I literally threw up.” You snap.

“You’ve been like this before though! Like last year’s big tournament you would barely talk to me.”

“That’s not true!” Although it kind of was just not the reason he thought.

“Oh yeah? What about at training camp you wouldn’t talk to me then either, you didn’t even eat with us you just sat on your own.” He threw back.

“Yeah, cause I have anxiety!” The words left your mouth before you knew it. Kuroo looked taken back.

“What?” His brow furrows, “Since when?” He’s not sure what to believe. You’re not surprised since you have worked very hard to hide it from everyone, accidentally sabotaging your own relationship without even knowing it. 

“Since forever. I just never told anyone.” You quietly say, ducking your head down.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” You didn’t even need to look up to see the hurt on his face, it was apparent in his voice. You start playing with your finger, tapping them in rhythms.

“I wanted to,” You mumble, “But whenever I do stuff changes and I didn’t want anything to change.” He shifts forward and you think he’s going to leave. Instead, he grabs your hands, stopping the pattern you had going. You look up.

“Did you think I would judge you?” He was staring straight into you, willing the truth to come out.

“Whenever I tell people they either don’t believe me and brush it off or treat me like I’m incapable of handling any amount of stress. I’ve never seen anyone react any differently so I was scared you would fall into one of those reactions and I didn’t know how I could handle that. I didn’t want my anxiety to be the thing to tear us apart. But I guess it still was.” By the end of your speech, your gaze has returned back to the floor, unable to hold eye contact for that long with him staring at you so strongly. You hear him sigh then you are pulled forward and into his arms. 

“I want to be your pillar of support. I want to be that third reaction that is one of acceptance, one that doesn’t drive you crazy.” He strokes your hair soothingly, his words making you tear up, “When you are ready I want you to tell me everything. From when you first noticed it, to where it is now, to how you deal with it, everything.” By now you are fully crying, absolutely collapsed into his chest. “I love you so much.” It gets muffled in his shirt but he hears it.

“I know, and I love you.”

It would take some time for Kuroo to get used to this change but slowly but surely he will be different from the rest and he will support you no matter what. Although he also respects your strength and knows you can handle your anxiety on your own, he is always there when you need it. He becomes the third unexpected and unheard-of reaction; acceptance.

[zhongliologist]

Shibari + Zhongli canon compliant nsfw

Pairing: Zhongli x Gender Neutral!reader

Genre: SMUT SMUT SMUT!! 

Words: 3.9k

AN: Hi anon!! Sorry this took a while! THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING THIS ONE!! I’m glad I had experience writing something like this before skajdha I decided I can’t fit this into a small drabble, so here’s like a really long version lmao my two itty bitty braincells are now in no-brain mode, so this might be full of typos or errors. 

*WARNING!! THIS IS PURE SMUT. IF YOU ARE A MINOR, IT IS UPON YOUR DISCRETION. PLEASE READ RESPONSIBLY*

***

When Zhongli first heard the word while on a stroll late one night, he had realized that there was indeed an artform he had yet to encounter or at least heard of. His curiosity peaked, it was only a matter of time before he finally had to give in and ask you what it was.

“YN, if I may,” he began, settling the cup of tea to the table. “There is something I wish to know.”

Attention caught, you raised your brows at him—surprised that there was actually something Zhongli has yet to know—as you took a mouthful of wonton noodles.

“Sure, ask away,” you replied, chewing.

“Well, this was several nights ago,” Zhongli recounted, his deep voice serious. “I was passing by a group of shipbuilders and I couldn’t help but over hear their conversation.”

You hummed, prompting him to continue while stuffing another serving of blackened bass in your mouth.

“Their discussion involved an artform popular in Inazuma, and apparently has spread all over Teyvat as well,” he continued. “Unfortunately, I have yet to hear about this certain artform. Could you care enlighten me please?”

Leaning your head to the side, you wondered what it was. There wasn’t any popular art trend nowadays which Zhongli doesn’t know, so you became to grow curious as well.

“Did you catch the name of it?”

Zhongli nodded. “Yes. It’s called shibari.”

You almost choked on the food you were eating.

“Are you sure that’s what you heard?”

“I believe it is what I have heard,” he replied. “Is there something wrong?”

Sighing, you were going to have a lot of trouble explaining it to him. It was painfully obvious how Zhongli is so out of touch from the pleasures of mankind.

Pinching the bridge of your nose, you decided it was best for him to know, before he does something unexpected.

“It’s kind of a sexual play,” you told him, but despite your words, Zhongli only glanced at you, eyes blinking.

Watching him, you noticed he had placed his hand over his chin—a habit he had whenever he was thinking. Whatever comes out of his thoughts, you were beginning to become nervous.

“I see. So, performing art during intercourse…interesting,” he mumbled to himself. “It is not too far off considering the fact that intercourse could also be deemed as a form of art, wherein it takes specialized honed skill to elicit a pleasurable result. To take two art forms and combine them in one act…I am astonished at the inventiveness of man.”

You took a bite from a dumpling, eyes jaded. “It’s not that grand, you know.”

“Now that I am aware of its existence,” Zhongli continued, paying no heed to your comment. “I wish to experience it myself. YN, I must request for your assistance.”

The dumpling you were eating fell back to your plate. “…what?”

“This…this shibari. I wish to partake in this now popular art form,” he repeated, but you only became more flabbergasted.

“Didn’t you hear me say that it’s a sexual play?!”

“I did. That is why it must be you,” Zhongli replied, taking your hand and placing it over his smirking lips. “You are my lover after all.”

Flustered, you had no choice but to agree. You knew of Zhongli’s immense curiosity and nothing is going to stop him from finding out what he wants to find out. Moreover, you wouldn’t really want him to experience it with someone else.

“F-fine,” you conceded, still nervous. “But give me a month to prepare. You should also ready yourself.”

Wondering why he had to wait and ‘ready’ himself, Zhongli leaned his head to the side. “Very well, but why a month?”

You scratched your nape as you averted your gaze somewhere. “I don’t have the right stuff, and I don’t have enough knowledge to do it properly. So give me some time.”

*

It had been a month since that conversation had occurred, and Zhongli began to feel a little bit antsy as the day drew near. It wasn’t common for him to feel this nervous energy, always maintaining his calm and composure. But it was different this time.

Since that discussion with you, you had banned any sort of sexual act from sex to masturbation, all except from small kisses; and as someone who had gotten used to your presence in his arms at night, Zhongli instantly felt withdrawal symptoms cloud his dignified countenance.

Zhongli inhaled sharply as soon as you entered his room, anticipation deeply running in his veins. You took a shower right after him, making him wait and allowing his imagination to run rampant inside his head.

“Sorry, did I make you wait?” you asked, making your way to the bed in nothing but a bathrobe.

“No, it’s alright,” Zhongli replied, his long hair now freely flowing after he had taken off his ponytail when he was taking a shower.

Running your hands through his dark hair, you admired the way they slipped against your skin as if they were made of silk. Absentmindedly, you began to braid his hair in a lose coif, making him relax underneath your touch.

“Um…er…YN, are we going to—”

You hummed, interrupting his words as you smiled. “Eager, aren’t we?”

“I fear that I may longer be able to contain my anticipation,” he confessed, feeling your hands on his back through the thin robe he was wearing.

Grinning, you knelt down and embraced him from the back; giving his temple a small kiss. “It seems like I don’t have to ask you if you’re sure about this.”

Loving how you felt so warm around him, Zhongli smiled as well as he intertwined his fingers between yours. “I do feel nervous, but it was I who wished to know; thus I must see it to the end.”

“Well, that settle’s it then,” you replied as you removed yourself from his shoulders. “Before we start, I need to remind you that we can always stop if you can no longer handle it, ok?”

Zhongli sighed. “I am confident that I can handle something like this.”

“Please stop being so stubborn,” you retorted back, annoyed that he really has to insist he wouldn’t need it. “Since it will take you forever to decide, I’ve picked one for you. It’s Rex Lapis. Say it when it gets too much.”

He scoffed. “You retaliate in the most absurd of ways, yet very well, I’ll keep it mind. Nonetheless, that does not mean I will use it.”

You grinned. “You’ll take that back soon enough.”

As you said those words, you shifted from your seat and faced him; hands cupping his chin. There was a look of surprise in Zhongli’s expression as soon as you tilted his head up to meet your eyes—too slow to react at the situation.

“Now, from here on out, I’m the one in charge. Any misdemeanor will warrant due punishment,” you began, voice firm and authoritative. “Are we clear, Zhongli?”

It took him some time to adjust at the sudden shift in the air; stunned at the tone you were giving him. This was probably the first time he had seen you take the lead, and it might’ve given him some sort of whiplash.

“Answer me,” you demanded, which made him jerk his attention back to you.

“I—uh…yes…”

“Very good.”

Smiling at his response, you removed yourself before him and sat just beside him with an easy expression. “Well then, why don’t you take off that robe? Just the robe though, leave your underwear on.”

Brought on by the awkward situation and the fact that you just ordered him to strip, Zhongli’s face immediately heated up to a few degrees. It was strange that he was feeling it for some reason—was this the actual appeal of the performative art form? Or was this simply one of your whims?

As he removed the silk tie tying his robe shut and slid it on the floor, you instructed him to quietly kneel down on the bed before you; hands neatly placed on top of his lap.

“Y-YN…? What is this…?” he asked, confusion marring his youthful face. It was embarrassing to sit on the bed that way, wearing nothing but his underwear, his dick beginning to form a tent.

Yet you only smiled at him.

“Don’t worry. We’re getting to the actual act,” you replied, crawling towards him before placing your hands on his bare chest. “If you can hold on till then, I might actually award you, you know?”

Leaning down, you immediately captured his lips in a deep kiss, moving softly yet sensually against his. Cupping his cheeks, you pushed your tongue inside and easily played with his. For some reason, this felt way hotter than the kisses you previously shared, with Zhongli unable to keep his hands to himself and began to wrap his arms around your waist.

You broke off the kiss with a click of your tongue; your thumb still on his swollen lips.

“YN…”

“What did I say about touching?” you asked, eyes holding nothing but pure mischief.

As soon as he heard you, Zhongli knew he had made a mistake and instantly rescinded his embrace; eliciting a chuckle from you.

“I—uh, forgive me…” he hurriedly told you, his voice beginning to lose their strength as he stuttered and tumbled at the words he used to be so eloquent with. As someone who has prided of his calm demeanor, Zhongli felt a surge of embarrassment at how he easily succumbed to your touch.

It was so adorable to see him like this; all flustered and nervous, making you want to see more of those reactions you have yet to see.

“Stay there. I’ll be right back,” you told him and stood up; an idea forming in your thoughts.

The moment you left; thoughts of things he might’ve done wrong kept repeating inside his head. He was scared that he might’ve crossed something which he shouldn’t have—the sounds of you rummaging through your belongings only exacerbated the nervousness that was already in his system.

However, you were not gone for long. He could sense you behind him, daring not to move or look back, and as soon as you draped a cold silk cloth over his eyes, he instantly realized what he had eagerly signed up for.

For one, as the Geo Archon, it was unimaginable for him to be in such a position, but for some reason, Zhongli found it incredibly arousing to have him at your mercy—to be restricted and ordered around; to be at the other end of the spectrum from what he was used to?

This is strange indeed…

“Don’t you agree that everything feels more vivid when you’re blindfolded?” you asked, now back on his lap; and despite being robbed of sight, he could tell you were smirking. “Does it feel good, Zhongli?”

“I…I cannot be certain…” he replied, the feeling of your intense stare sending shivers down his spine. “I haven’t experienced something like this before…”

At his hesitation, you could only giggle and gave him a small kiss. “Well, there’s a first for everything, but this one here…”

Your voice trailed off, your hand effortlessly finding his half hard dick and pressed on it harshly; eliciting a strangled moan from him. “It’s been feeling good for a while now, don’t you think so Zhongli?”

“I…I—!” He was at a lost for words; the pleasure he felt intoxicating his mind. You were right, the blindfold seemed to heightened his senses to such degrees of vividness.

“I can’t blame you really,” you told him, still toying with his member with your finger but not fully committing on pumping it up and down. “I did tell you to hold off for a month, of course, you’d be unusually sensitive and horny.”

If Zhongli thought his face was hot enough before, he hadn’t anticipated for it to feel full out burning as if his blood was set on fire. He tried holding off the sounds he was making whenever you pepper kisses on his shoulders, but to no avail. He was gradually becoming heady at the immense pleasure your hand was giving. By the time you continued talking, he was already panting heavily, skin flushed and hands balled so tightly into a fist, his knuckles turning white.

“Y-YN…” He wanted to say ‘too much’, but he didn’t want to stop you either.

“I’m impressed you can keep your hands to yourself,” you remarked playfully, rewarding him with a love bite just underneath his jaw. “Why don’t we move on to the actual thing itself?”

Even with the blindfold, Zhongli could feel you standing up; anticipation once again beating wildly against his chest. What were you going to do to him this time?—that was a thrill he had never expected to feel pleasure from.

You returned once more to his side, now with the appropriate items you needed, and brilliant grin on your lips to top it off. It was weirdly exciting for you as well, finally doing something as erotic as this to a dignified gentleman such as Zhongli. Which is why, you couldn’t help but talk him through it.

“I did tell you that shibari some sort of sexual play, right?” you began, as you seized both of his hand and pinned them on his back. “It involves tying someone up with rope, in patterns that are not only visually pleasing but are also designed to make you feel good.”

Zhongli could feel the roughness of the rope cling to his skin as soon as you tied his wrists together before doing various knots up his torso and down to his legs. It was incredibly strange—you were only tying him up but for some reason, he felt so exposed and so turned on.

“The reason why it’s so popular is because it gives a sense of security if you will,” you continued, remembering the patterns you had religiously practiced over and over again for the past month. “As if you were surrendering everything to that one person, trusting that they can give you security, give you pleasure. That is what this art form is.”

Every time he felt your soft hands brush against his damp skin as you tightened the rope around his body, he would control a shudder that kept on surging through him like a multitude of waves. This was beyond the ordinary, a situation Zhongli had not anticipated—you were right when you told him to prepare himself. He definitely did not heed your advice, and it came to him with a price, especially when you finally wrapped some rope around his dick as it stood straight and hard between his legs.

“If only you could see yourself right now, Zhongli,” you told him, pressing firmly on the ropes around his member before nibbling on his earlobe. “Aah, I just want to eat you up.”

With your sultry voice directly sending shockwaves down his lower parts, he could only dig his fingernails on the palm of his hands as the hemp ropes dug deeper in his skin. Even though they were not too tight, the restrictive sensation enveloping his body, plus the way you were touching him now was making him lose his mind.

“YN…YN…p-please, I—!”

He spoke between gasps as he felt your lips suckle on a sensitive point on his neck, his dick twitching as he tried to jerk up.

You hummed amusingly. “What is it, love? Where do you want me to touch you?”

Raking up your fingernails up his toned chest, you smirked as he groaned, unable to find any sort of friction he had been seeking for some time now. The way his long dark locks stuck to his skin because of how much he was sweating, or the way he trembled and shivered at every touch of his skin—you loved them all. As much as how Zhongli was intoxicated by pleasure, you were also heady with the power you had over him.

Not waiting for his answer, you crept your hands up and suddenly pinched his nipples—making him jolt straight up at the abrupt stimulation with a loud moan.

“Do you like it here?” you asked, now lavishing your tongue over a hardened nub; relentless and teasing.

“Ahh…! YN…! Wait, please!”

All of his thoughts had already vanished, replaced only by the sensations of your tongue on his now sensitive nipples, of the ropes wound tightly around him, of how painfully hard his dick was. It felt good, he had to admit it. It felt incredibly good.

“Do you want me to stop? I can always stop,” you asked, smiling. “If not, tell me where else I should touch you.”

Breathless as his chest heaved, Zhongli tried to find the words he wanted to say even as his lips trembled.

“Um…please touch….m-my…”

He was blushing furiously, the word seemingly unable to pass through his lips.

“Your what, Zhongli?” you asked him again, almost cooing but inwardly laughing at how he just can’t say the word ‘dick’.

Biting his lip to stop it from quivering too much, it seemed like he really has to throw every sense of dignity he had in him just to relieve his arousal.

“M-my…pe—ahh!!"

You pinched one of his nipples, pouting. “Don’t you dare call it penis, or else I won’t let you cum. Now, as you were saying?”

If only his head wasn’t too hazy from all the sensations stimulating him simultaneously, he would’ve made a mental note to make you suffer at a later date, but right now, his brain was being ran by his dick.

“P-Please…YN…! My—my…d-dick…I can’t…” he forced between pants as his sweat made the ropes feel even tighter and his underwear feel even more sticky.

Smirking at your victory, you pressed a kiss on his lips, your hands finally removing his dick from the constraints of his underwear. You could feel him groan on your lips as you began to move your hand up and down, and making sure to reach his most sensitive spots.

“Look at you, getting this hard after being tied up,” you whispered to his lips, a grin plastered on your face. “I didn’t know you were this dirty, Zhongli.”

“I-I’m…not!”

He tried to deny it but you kept his mouth shut by squeezing his cock tightly.

“Really now?” you asked, voice low as you kept on pumping him, his voice becoming nothing but dirty noise. “Are you about to cum?”

“YN…!” he growled, the ropes keeping his legs folded biting on his skin. “T-too much….! I’m…!”

Mercilessly, you continued to jerk him off as he crept closer and closer to climax. However, there he realized that the ropes around his member had gotten tighter, and the painful throbbing he felt was because he couldn’t cum.

“Oh? Did you find it out?” you asked, chuckling at the look of desperation so evident in his face. “If you can endure this in a few more minutes, I’ll reward you. How about that?”

“N-no, no….! YN…p-please, I c-can…no longer….” Most of his words were incomprehensible, affected by the pleasure and the pain on his cock.

You hummed playfully once more. “Do you want me to stop then? You can always say the safe word, you know?”

“No! W-wait…please! I n-need…I can’t…!”

“Then endure,” you replied, an idea blooming in your head. Your free hand then reached for the blindfold covering his eyes and unraveled it, allowing him to finally see.

However, he did not have time to recover when you immediately caught his attention.

“Look how hard you are, Zhongli,” you told him, his amber eyes blow wide by his current state. Yet strangely, the thought of him so aroused and at your mercy, only made him harder.

Laying down on the bed with your chest on the mattress, you looked up to him, his dick on your hands; your eyes reflecting mischief. “If you can hold on for a few minutes, I’ll let you cum, alright?”

Zhongli only gazed down on you, face as hot as the sun and as red as beet. He watched as you took his dick in your mouth and began sucking him off. At the sensation, he instantly threw his head back. This was totally different from your hands. This was just incredible.

With lustful eyes, you watched him convulse before as you assaulted him with your tongue—sucking and licking at every sensitive point you knew. The underside and the tip were particularly sensitive and that was where you concentrated.

“A-ahh…! Oh…shit…YN!” he groaned, his deep voice and the way he was now cursing sent you reeling as well. “T-too good…I’m…f-fuck…!”

You chuckled, the vibrations on your throat making his dick twitch as you kept on bobbing your head. Gazing up, you both exchanged glances as you kept on sucking the tip; his eyes tightly closing at the intensity.

“Are you going to cum?” you asked before diving in once again, your hands secretly making their way underneath his underwear and finding his hole. “I’ll help you.”

“W-wait…! T-that’s!” he jolted up yet unable to do anything but feel your fingers brushing around the rim.

Prodding at his hole, you enjoyed watching the pained yet lustful expression he was making on his otherwise stoic face. His eyebrows furrowed, his cheeks flushed pink, his mouth ajar as drool poured down his chin. It was fascinating, addicting. You can’t help but tease him endlessly, relentlessly as he kept on moaning your name again and again as if under a spell.

“P-Please….let me…I can’t…I’m going to….Y-YN…!”

Deciding that this was finally the limit of his first time, you cleverly untied the knot on his back which kept the rope around his pelvis secure, allowing it to loosen.

Still sucking him off and poking on his hole, you could feel him twitch inside your mouth, an indication that he was close.

“YN…! I’m….ughh…c-coming!”

In a few pumps, Zhongli climaxed in your mouth; his warm cum on your throat. It was a bit too much, and a little thick so you were unable to swallow everything, allowing it to drip down your chin.

Released from his high, Zhongli couldn’t believe he just had his biggest nut of his life after being tied up. It was in every ounce, shameful and embarrassing but it just felt too good for him to resist at all. Maybe it wasn’t too much of a bad thought to do this once in a while.

Eventually, you loosened the ropes that were still on him and took note of the rope markings on his skin, reminding yourself to give him that special balm you got for this exact purpose. As soon as you released him, you pulled him to a deep kiss which he gladly reciprocated.

Unlike your previous ones, this kiss was one of concern and care—asking and answering questions that were difficult to convey. As your lips moved against each other, your chest began to warm and float, glad that you were able to deliver his request. When you both pulled away, the normal Zhongli was back; his eyes warm and lively.

“I’m glad it felt good,” you told him, cupping his cheek. “I was afraid I might hurt you or something.”

He only chuckled and gave you a pat. “I did tell you I can handle it.”

You sighed in relief, loving the way he was touching you. “So, how about we sleep—"

Zhongli however interrupted you, pushing you down the bed, pinning your wrists. He was smiling but you definitely knew you were screwed.

“I reckon it is time for me take my revenge,” he gazed at you, eyes turning feral. “No one will be sleeping tonight.”

[shushiyuii]

Subject T0M au

This is an Au I’ve had stockpiled for a while wkakdnknak. It’s going to multiple parts too, once I get to working on those. If you have any questions you’re welcome to ask!

I hope you guys enjoy it (Also gimme your fucking requests UwU /lh)

Warnings: Experimentation, injury? And Horror elements (It’s mainly fluff i promise :3)

Words: 3K

Document – T0MMY1NN1T

Assigned to: Doctor Wilbur Soot Watson

Description: Subject T0M was once a [REDACTED] by the name of [REDACTED] [REDACTED]. His age is of kin to an elder teen, probably around the age of [REDACTED] to [REDACTED].

The appearance of Subject T0M is like a human, they have blonde hair and pale skin. Their most common height is 6’3 on average but can change depending on the form. Their face, arms and legs are covered in a black substance of unknown origin, it mainly takes on half of their body and appears to be almost liquid.

Their face is completely black, the only thing apparent is their fangs like a wolf when they open their mouth to feed, multiple fangs, the only other feature on Subject T0M’s face is their light blue eyes that glow in the dark.

Subject T0M isn’t very intelligent, they have some semblance of human intelligence, understanding simple language and commands.

They’re quite approachable as well but Subject T0M is to be approached with caution, as they could be quite dangerous. If angered there’s no knowing what Subject T0M is capable of.

Their abilities consist of being able to manipulate the material of their body, being able to change shape and size, their favourite is to mimic those around them. It is not an exact copy; it is apparent that Subject T0M is themselves because the material of their body will still be there even if they changed forms.

They can also create weaponry and different things from their material but again not exact copies, they’re quite harmless usually.

Subject T0M is to be assigned to Rookie Doctor Wilbur Soot. Under the watch of Philza Watson.

 Entry 01 – 02/09/20—

So today was my first-day researching Subject T0M, from what I can say so far is that they’re quite interesting but so far besides the examinations, they haven’t shown much behaviour. Only staring at me from a distance.

Also, I’m not used to this sort of thing like writing documents and reports, not my favourite thing in the world but it’s not the worst thing either. So, Subject T0M already has a lot of his abilities recorded, I’m just here to see if he develops any noteworthy changes and watch over the guy.

Currently, there is no change in behaviour, he just stares down at me at a distance, like I’m the most interesting thing he’s ever seen, perhaps that’s the case?

He seems so lonely in that containment cell, it’s just an empty white box surrounded by glass, perhaps at some point I could request an upgrade to higher-ups for the lil’ fella? That way he can have a more comfortable place. Rather than a highly lit, bland, cold box.

 Entry 02 – 05/09/20—

So Today, Subject T0M did something quite interesting, it’s a drastic difference from the last few days by just staring at me through the windows of the cells.

You see, instead of just watching me from the other side of the office, as usual, it can get quite boring in the office once you finish the days' assignments of reports, schedules, contracts and more and having to watch this guy and do the usual routine gets quite boring so I decided to work on some personal things and bring my guitar, so I could work on my songs, practising the guitar and stuff.

So, I played some things, the next thing I know is that one moment I’m singing, the next in shock as I look over in disbelief. Subject T0M had moved over towards the window, his hands and face on the glass, dead staring me in my eyes, they were filled with curiosity and interest like an infant listening to music for the first time.

A way to describe it would be that Subject T0M seemed so much happier, but when I stopped, he looked almost disappointed, I stared at him in amazement for a moment and I started to play again, and his expression went back to being amazed.

My music seems to interest Subject T0M so perhaps I should do more research and experiments with different kinds of music to see which they prefer?

Not only that but it’s nice to have someone rather than my dad that enjoys my music. They’re almost my second biggest fan. I’m looking forward to seeing more of this kid.

Entry 03 – 06/09/20—

As of now, I have started the experimentation of music with Subject T0M, he seems to prefer rather upbeat, pop music and general music.

I also played him some songs from popular games, one of them being The Able Sister’s from Animal Crossing, he really seemed to enjoy that one.

Besides the experiments, I’ve started to talk to Subject T0M as it does get lonely here, plus he’s the only other guy here in the department. Although he doesn’t talk, he’s a great listener, nodding whenever I state my opinion and even trying to communicate verbally from time to time, even though he doesn’t seem to have the ability to speak.

And I’ve also seemed to have started a habit of calling Tom or Tommy, it suits him! He’s also been showing more personality, he seems more aggressive like a gremlin but not in a bad way, he’s just displaying more emotion it seems.

Entry 04 – 09/09/20—

So, the experiments and communication of Tommy have made significant progress. He’s become feistier and more vocal, he’s not aggressive in a physical sense, just annoyingly loud. He’s like a fucking child.

And today was another experiment with Tom, with the test subject being myself since it seems safe enough, so need to gather others or security over it.

I entered his containment cell, and the moment I did, Tommy showed no difference in behaviour, to begin with, just a somewhat surprised expression on his face. Probably because this was the first time, he had seen me so close.

I carefully approached at first but then a thought came to me. So far I’ve been treating him like a human so maybe treating him the same way now would have the same effects?

I sat down next to him and started talking to him as usual, and he slowly started to move closer to me, cautiously. He seemed almost nervous, but his focus was on me, rather than himself. I found it rather odd, maybe something is wrong?

Again, he tried talking back but of course, it sounded like a fucking crack pipe, so it didn’t quite work. But he was talking and for some reason, it just brought a smile to my face.

I felt like an older brother would be a way to describe it, I made a promise in my head to protect him. We even tried singing together, it was a lot of fun, I look forward to spending more time with him.

Entry 05 – 12/09/20—

The past couple of days have been a lot of fun with Tommy like I’ve gained a friend. You see, growing up I was always a bit lonely, I was social, but I never found myself clicking with anyone because nobody had the same interests as me, so I turned to focus more on my studies, science in fact like my father told me too. And look at me now!

I’m a training researcher in the same facility as my dad, as this place is one of a kind opportunity, so I guess I got pretty lucky. And it seems Tommy agrees maybe, he reminds me of well me, I don’t want him to be lonely like I was, maybe I could arrange a meeting between other monsters?

Entry 06 – 14/09/20—

Tommy and I have been bonding a lot more lately and I’ve also improved a lot myself with finishing work sooner and taking up more assignments.

Speaking of which my father said if I keep this up, I may get more recognition in the facility, maybe even a promotion which I’m happy about. I’ve sent in a request to the higher-ups to allow Tommy communication of other monsters to which I hope they approve.

Besides that, I was talking to Tommy as per usual and he displayed a different emotion, excitement. He seemed eager to show me something and when I asked, “What is it?”. His form changed to be slightly taller and more of his black substance covered his body but after a while, his form changed to be similar to my own, he tried copying me.

Like physically. It was quite surprising if I’m honest, my shocked expression to Tommy made him realise the situation and immediately changed back and tried to reassure me, I felt bad and tried to reassure him it was okay. It’s funny to look back on.

Entry 07 – 15/09/20—

I got approval from the higher-ups, probably getting special treatment since my dad is one of the higher-ups, others aren’t normally so lucky. Dad, or should I say Doctor Philza? He said we could have a meeting between Tommy and his subject, R4NB00 or as he says Ranboo.

 Dad said that his subject Ranboo does need to socialise more since he appears to have symptoms of social anxiety so maybe this will do them both some good since they both seem to be around the same age. Like Tommy, Ranboo only socialises with him and another subject T3chn0, or the blade, blood god. He’s got quite a reputation around here.

Anyways, I’ll say what I know about Subject R4NB00 as of his report, so I know to look over it in case of emergency.

R4NB00 is a tall humanoid standing above 8 ft tall. They have a black and white fur coat, a thin fur coat to be described as silky. Their coat is black on one side and white on the other, their hair is the same but in the opposite way to his fur.

They have heterochromia in their eyes, one being green and the other a bright red. They also have horns of small height; they aren’t sharp and rather small so they wouldn’t hurt anybody with them. They also have a thin tail, with it being fluffy at the end.

Subject R4NB00 isn’t the biggest fan of the regular attire assigned to all subjects, they rather wear a tuxedo embedded with the facility’s logos. They are also timid, avoiding conflict whenever possible. They also can speak but prefer not to due to being shy, they will only communicate with a select few.

Their abilities consist of having the ability to teleport at will and communicate in an unknown language. They also have weaknesses being unable to touch the water and having a state of mind of when they aren’t in control of themselves, they talk in their unknown language in this state and teleport randomly, they are to be awoken as soon as possible unless they are in this state for a test.

Report 16/09/20-- - Meeting of Subject T0M and Subject R4NB00

Today was the meeting of Subject T0M and R4NB00. Both were properly secured successfully and safely in transportation cells with the required security of 5 guards each in each truck and successfully transported to the meeting facility without stress or failure.

Both researchers were safely secured behind the required monitoring window.

The meeting was rather successful between the two creatures. To begin with, when the two saw each other they both maintained distance, for Subject R4NB00 it was because they were anxious about meeting another creature and for Subject T0M, meeting somebody else rather than their researcher.

Subject T0M was the first to contact Subject R4NB00 by trying to communicate verbally with them, it was unsuccessful and resulted in Subject R4NB00 being confused. The two sat in silence for a moment longer until Subject T0M attempted another move of contact by cautiously approaching Subject R4NB00, which resulted in them backing up into a nearby wall and trying to get away from Subject T0M.

Subject T0M then backed off and changed their form to mimic R4NB00, this is theorised to be Subject T0M trying to either comfort or entertain Subject R4NB00, they then changed back into their regular form.

Despite being confused, Subject R4NB00 seemed to notice that Subject T0M meant no harm and then tried to approach subject T0M. Subject T0M did not move.

When Subject R4NB00 approached, there was approximately 1 meter between the two, Subject R4NB00 looked at the two researchers to look for approval to which he got from Doctor Philza via a thumbs up.

Subject T0M curious looked to where R4NB00 was looking and noticed the two researchers and made a noise of happiness towards his researcher, to which Doctor Soot responded with a smile and a thumbs up.

Both Subjects looked back at each other and sat down beside each other. Subject R4NB00 began to communicate with Subject T0M, Subject R4NB00 introduced themselves and made small communication, to which Subject T0M responded positively too, as they couldn’t communicate back. After that, the meeting was concluded.

After their meeting, when asked about the meeting by their researchers. Subject R4NB00 responded positively to seeing Subject T0M again and talked positively about them despite not being able to communicate.

Subject T0M appeared upset a few moments after the meeting, scratching at the windows of his cell, whining. When asked if he wished to see Subject R4NB00 again, he responded positively. Another meeting between the two has been arranged.

Entry 08 – 17/09/20—

Tommy seems to miss his new friend quite a bit but it’ll be a while before the next meeting between them as it has to be approved again and it’ll be a while.

Doing our normal routine keeps him happy for a while but if I leave him for more than 15 minutes he begins to whine again. I wasn’t quite sure what to do as I couldn’t keep him company all day.

On my lunch break I talked to my co-worker Doctor Puffy about the matter, she’s a smart gal and rather motherly, she reminds me of my mom at times. She suggested that I give Tommy a gift, like a plush bear to befriend so he wouldn’t feel so lonely while I was gone.

So, I quickly made my way to a store, it was rather odd to see myself, an adult in a toy aisle but I found a decent plush. It’s a Minecraft spider plushie. I gave Tommy the plushie and introduced him to the plush, when I asked him what he wanted to name the plush he responded with a sound, it honestly sounded like he said shroud, so I suggested it. He responded happily so I guess we now have Shroud the spider.

Now I’ve got the peril of getting medication for my father as he’s somehow gotten sick.

Incident Report  #19283 – 18/09/20-- -

No staff or other creatures were harmed during the containment breach, minor damages to the building, broken walls and broken windows within the cell. All to be fixed within a minimum of 3 hours. Subject T3CHN0 was successfully contained in a holding cell as we interviewed him as to why he breached containment, to which he responded that “Nobody told me where Phil was.”.

Doctor Philza was then contacted to talk to Subject T3CHN0 to explain his current predicament of being sick, to which Subject T3CHN0 huffed in response and refused to cooperate with us further.

Subject T3CHN0 escaped containment in a rampage, the reasoning being as he was not informed of his researchers’ location, as Doctor Philza was sick for the past two days before the incident. Both researcher and creature are rather close with each other, as to why the Subject was upset.

Prior to the incident (recorded by security cameras), Both Subjects of Doctor Philza were speaking to each other about the current location of their researcher, both concluded that neither of them had any idea of where the Doctor was, both subjects ask their temporary carer as to where their researchers’ location was, to which the carer wouldn’t respond so Subject T3CHN0 decided to find his answers.

Subject T3CHN0 broke through his containment cell’s window and then proceeded to break through multiple walls trying to find his researcher.

(The document then goes into detail about what T3CHN0 did during his rampage before he was contained)

During the rampage, Subject T3CHN0 broke through the walls of Doctor Soot’s office and his creature, Subject T0M. As Subject T3CHN0 entered the office, Doctor Soot was frightened at the unexpected visitor as tried to get away from the approaching Subject T3CHN0, Doctor Soot demanded that he get away, to which T3CHN0 huffed in response.

Subject T0M took some time to register that his researcher was in danger, but when he heard he did, he sprang into the action of defending his researcher.

His form changed into one of being described as fearsome, they changed heights to one over 15 ft tall, his hands turned into claws, long sharp fangs became visible, a sharp tail and pair of horns after appeared with this form. (Doctor Soot has been requested to do further research into this form)

Subject T0M roared in warning towards the other, then proceeded to pounce through their containment cells window, shards of glass scattered throughout the room.

They then ran towards their researcher and in a crouched position, picked up his fallen researcher and held him close to his chest, growling furiously at T3CHN0.

The two Subjects stared at each other for a moment until T3CHN0 began to communicate verbally by asking where his researcher was, Doctor Soot was too much in a state of shock to respond.

Subject T0M held his researcher closer and tried to comfort him in a way of purring, even nuzzling his researcher for a response, to which Subject T3CHN0 left due to being impatient.

Subject T0M continued to hold onto his researcher and eventually Doctor Soot snapped out of his state to stare in awe of Subject T0M, When Subject T0M saw their researcher responding he made worried sounds to them, to which Doctor Soot responded with a laugh and said: “I’m fine buddy”.

Subject T3CHN0 was then contained shortly afterwards.

[koobunno]

do we let anything happen tonight?// arrangedmarriage!au

gif isn't mine hehe

-----

CEO!Jungkook Doctor!OC

smut, slight angst, fluff

this is just a two chapter drabble, i just want to separate two ideas apart but they're connected so...off we go, hoping someone would read this...

unplanned pregnancy, fuck buddies, married au

warnings: raw sex, some curse words, cockwarming, consensual intercourse,*pls remind me if i missed something.

part 2

Chapter 1:

word count: 1,347 words

-----

Y/N and Jungkook’s been married for 2 years now, it isn’t the typical type of marriage though. It was that “arranged marriage” type of shit the both of you didn’t even know you’ll experience when they just saw those in books and movies on the screen. Mind you, it should've just lasted for a year. That is why both of you agreed even though you both hesitated, it was for the benefit of each other’s worlds so why not? Not until that one instance that you two decided to use each other for pleasure. No intentions of settling and falling for the other.

-

“Hmm, JK?” you hummed as you asked for your husband’s attention while the two of you were sitting at the sofa in the living room of your shared home. “Yes?” Jungkook replied curiously as you normally talked to him formally. “ Can I kiss you?” you blurted out making the lad in front of you choke with his own saliva due to shock. “Why would you even ask me that, we didn’t even kiss for real at our wedding” Jungkook laughed even though he was amused and holding himself to kiss and devour you right there and then. “It’s just that I think I’m nearing my period, you know hormones,and your lips look so soft though.” you honestly told him.

You then gave up with the thought and just went to the fridge to get some snacks to fill you up, while choosing upon the snacks you both stocked up, you were startled when your body was abruptly turned by no other than your husband. Jungkook claimed your lips and kicked the door of the fridge causing some bottles to shake. You immediately responded by the time you adjusted because no one knows how you needed someone to release your accumulated desire.

Jungkook grabbed your ass and without any thinking you jumped to him, wrapping your legs to his hips. Jungkook broke the kiss, “Should we continue this upstairs?” He asked. You nodded and while his hands were still on your thighs, he carried you through the stairs while you’re doing your job of pressing your breasts against his chest to heaten the session more.

The two of you arrived in your bedroom, still kissing. “Do we let anything happen tonight?” Jungkook asked like he was asking for permission. You nodded and told him that the two of you won’t lose anything if you do.

You then found yourself moaning his name for hours in the middle of the night. The both of you didn’t even know how to stop to the point that you two slept with his shaft inside you. By the time you two woke up because of work you even shared a steaming shower. Aware of the fact that you two did that mainly because of lust, disregarding the fact that the two of you are married.

Work for the both of you became exhausting each day, Jungkook works as the Chairman of their companies and you work as the Medical Director of the hospitals your family owns. The businesses mentioned are the main cause of your marriage.

The both of you looks forward to the end of the day to release stress through sex, orgasms and other lustful things. You two decided to act as “fuck buddies” for each other just to be safe and clean of diseases you might get if you fuck strangers. You’re updated at your injectables that’s why you won’t worry about being fucked raw.

---

“Uh-Jungkooo-oh shit!” you moaned out of pleasure while Jungkook digs in deep of your cunt. “Do you want me deeper?” He asked. “Yes, please!” You shouted as he held on to your shoulders for more support as he really did fucked you deeper. You switched positions and now you’re on top of him. “Insert it, babe” Jungkook told you as you held onto his dick and positioned it at your entrance. “Ah-fuck!” he hissed as you buried his cock inside your dripping pussy. He held onto your breasts as you jumped the shit out of you to pleasure yourself and the man under you. “I’m near Jungkook, do you want us to do it at the same time?” You asked haphazardly while catching your breath. “Yes, Y/N, just hang in there, I’m near too.” He told you and more thrusts later you were filled by both of your warm juices. You threw yourself in the bed while hot liquids were still dripping out of you.

You reached for your phone and almost threw it when you saw the time, it’s almost 8 in the morning, you didn’t even notice because of the pleasure of your morning session with your husband now back to sleeping naked, tired of what the two of you just did. You were running late for some check-ups you needed to do at the Pediatrics.

Pediatrics is your specialty field even though you didn’t imagine having kids for yourself because of the responsibilities you can’t even think of how to handle. You grabbed your keys and your coat as you finished preparing yourself. Cheeks still flustered with that after-sex glow, you drove to the hospital leaving your snoring husband knowing that he doesn’t have a certain time for work.

---

You finished your rounds and check-ups by 11 a.m, you decided to go home early to catch up some sleep because you fucking woke up at 6:30 a.m just to find yourself moaning and cumming multiple times.

Before you even grabbed your coat, your secretary knocked telling you that you have a schedule for the OB’s. You nodded and set your coat and your bag aside as you went to the nearby office of the doctor you’re looking for. You asked her secretary and she immediately let you inside. Dr. Park displayed a face of shock when she saw you. “Do you need anything, Dr. Y/L/N?” she asked you curiously not knowing your main agenda. “Huh? I have a schedule for my injectables today, am I missing something?” You asked flabbergasted. “I thought you'd quitted getting injectable contraceptives because you were supposed to have them last week?” she said, leaving you in a peculiar expression. “Can’t I get them today?” you asked while the thoughts of you being filled with Jungkook’s cum almost everyday the past few weeks surrounding your head making you quite nervous and paranoid. “I’m afraid you can’t, as I look into your records you can get them the first week of the next month if you want.” she said leaving you astonished. “Oh, I see, I’ll just come back by then.” you said immediately leaving her office, dashing into yours upset or what not, you’re fucking confused right now.

You drove to some store removing the thoughts of the information you accumulated earlier to unwind, shop for a little and grab some take-out foods to comfort you somehow. Carrying the shopping bags you got and a pizza meal you went home just to find your god-like husband in his sweats and a plain shirt far from his everyday designer coat-clad. You greeted him while he grabbed the things on your hand to aid you. After he settled those he grabbed your ass and bit your lower-lip. “Luckily I didn’t have work errands today, I was so tired of what we did early in the morning.” he told you. “So you just slept in?” you asked and he agreed. The both of you shared pizza and watched a movie and you ended up sucking him in, completely forgetting your paranoid thoughts, you found yourself cockwarming him while you watch a movie.

Weeks passed you noticed your clothes are tight-fitting, you often fall short on your breath and gets tired easily. “Fuck” you thought, you were no dumb not to realize all of those symptoms if you must say. The test in front of you said it is positive so you just confirmed for yourself. Not wanting anyone to know yet, not even your husband, you just went to hide the plastic strip.

[equestrianwritingsstuff]

For the BTHB... Villain with appendicitis?

Thank you for the ask!

Rupturing

@badthingshappenbingo

Warnings: appendectomy, fever, anxious character, painkillers, pills, vomit, anesthesia, surgery, IV, needles, refusal of medical care

~

9:01. He was a minute late.

9:05. Five minutes late.

9:15. Hero started to pace around, kicking pebbles with her foot.

9:20. She was starting to get nervous. Villain was never, ever late.

9:30. Okay, this was getting absurd.

Hero stood up, grabbed her phone, and called Villain. It rang, but never clicked.

He didn't answer.

Hero bit her lip, a nauseating pit forming in her gut.

Something was wrong. Villain was always overly stressed about time and always showed up at nine- not a second too late.

So, naturally, being the anxious, paranoid worry wort that Hero was, she went to check up on him.

Of course, Hero spent all her freetime figuring out where Villain lived if there was an instance like the current one.

Upon knocking at the beige door, that nauseous feeling overcame her again. Something was wrong.

She busted through the door and immediately the eerie silence of the home startled her. Even though Villain lived alone, there would surely be a TV playing or the dishwasher going.

Hero searched through the various rooms. It was a normal house. Quaint and small with barely any decor apart from a few spontaneously placed plants. All the walls were painted with the same, dull blue that the sky had right before a storm. It was dreary and perfectly villainous.

"Villain!" Hero called, peeking into a room she assumed to be his bedroom. Apart from a shoddily made bed, it seemed as though Villain hadn't been in there for a long time.

The next room in the hallway was a bathroom. Hero stepped in there, ignoring the horrid stench, and examined the counters. Bottles of Tylenol and Ibuprofen were scattered about. His gnawed on toothbrush was laying by the sink as water slowly dripped from the faucet.

That didn't look spectacular.

Hero stepped out of the bathroom and turned the light off before turning and walking into a large room that seemed to be the kitchen and dining room combined.

"Hey Villain! Are you home?" Hero called again, observing how badly stocked the fridge and cupboards were. Basically, the only food that Villain seemed to store was ramen and some protein powder.

"Villain!" Hero yelled, getting nervous. Based on the state of his bedroom, bathroom, and kitchen, the villain seemed to be in rough state.

Or was that just her nervous tendencies kicking in?

The next room was without doubt the living room, though with those desolate walls, one may beg to differ.

In the center of the gray room was a dark cherry wood coffee table and a small armchair. And that was it.

Except for the body strewn across the ground.

Hero bounded over to the seemingly dead corpse and rolled it over to come face to face with Villain.

"Oh my gosh!" Hero exclaimed, thrusting her fingers by his neck to check for a pulse. It was there, thump... thump... thump...

"You okay?" Hero asked, smoothing the sweaty strands of hair out of his face. Villain blearily blinked his eyes open and shook his head.

"Stomach bug," he whispered.

Hero looked down at him skeptically. No, this wasn't just a stomach bug. He was obviously in pain and was likely running a nasty fever. And he looked so incredibly tired and weak.

"How long have you been like this?" Hero asked, putting Villain's heavy head in her lap.

"M day," he groaned, gasping for breath. "Stomach hurts."

"Where?" Hero asked. Villain lightly brushed his fingers over his right side.

"Oh okay bud. I think you have a fever," Hero said, taking his temperature with her hand. It was burning and he looked so pale.

"Yeah cold," Villain agreed, nodding the tiniest nod.

"Okay buddy," Hero murmured, stroking his flushed cheek. "I think we need to go to the doctor."

She recognized the symptoms. Her sister when they were kids got sick like this and they had to take her to the hospital. Hero was too young to exactly know what was going on, only that it was serious.

But Villain shook his head, aimlessly clawing at Hero's hand.

"No doctor. No doctor," he begged, then winced, whimpered and grabbed his right side. When he looked back up at Hero, there were tears in his eyes.

"Okay we are going now," Hero stood up with Villain in a bridal carry. He protested weakly, but then stilled. Hero stopped walking to see if he was still conscious by shaking him. He groaned.

Hero loaded Villain in the back seat of her truck and buckled him in around his chest and legs so he could safetly rest.

The drive to the hospital seemed longer than what it was. Every moment she got, Hero would look behind her to peer at Villain, and everytime he was still staring at the ceiling with a dazed expression.

Finally, they arrived. Hero barely put the vehicle in park by the time she was leaping out of the door and running to Villain's side.

"Hey! Hey!" Hero called when she ran into the hospital, placing Villain on a bench. Other patients stared at her and receptionists stood up to meet her.

"Bring him into the ER," one of the receptionists said as she grabbed a stack of papers and called the doctor. Hero gathered Villain back in her arms and ran into another room.

The receptionist handed Hero the stack of papers. "Fill these in to thr best of your ability. I'm going to get the doctor."

Hero sat on the raised hospital bed with Villain resting against her shoulder. He sighed contently and nuzzled his cheek to find a perfect spot. Hero looked over at him- he was almost asleep with his whole body splayed out and limp.

Hero wrapped her arm around his shivering body and rubbed his shoulder before answering some of the paperwork.

She was able to answer most of them relatively easily, but got stumped on occupation.

She couldn't just say villainy right?

"Hero, why hello. How is your arm healing?"

Hero looked up to see the doctor sauntering into the room, his blonde hair slightly tousled with pale gray shadows under his eyes- remnants of a busy day.

"Good, good," Hero said, putting the paperwork aside.

"Is this one of your team members?" The doctor asked, running a thermometer over Villain's forehead. He frowned at the reading.

"Not exactly," Hero replied, timidly. She rubbed Villain's hair as he stirred from the cool touch of the thermometer. He near immediately fell back asleep.

The doctor's face paled. "He's a villain? Hero you know-"

"Yes, I know, but look at him Doc," she gestured her head towards Villain's sagging body.

The doctor glanced at Villain for a moment. He then said, "Yeah, he's sick. I'm thinking appendicitis, but he's a villain. The hospital is not required to treat them, unless there's an order. Order as in signed by ten, high-ranking heroes. Besides, it'll endanger our staff."

"He can't even lift his head!" Hero exclaimed. "How is he going to be a threat under anesthesia? C'mon tell me."

"He could wake up..."

"As sick as he is? Not likely."

"A MRI scan could amplify his abilities."

Suddenly Villain coughed, interrupting the conversation. He groaned before expelling his stomach's contents on the floor.

"It's okay," Hero murmured, scowling slightly at the sight, before glaring at the doctor while raising her eyebrows.

The doctor sighed. "Lay him on the bed." Hero complied, laying the villain flat on the bed, adjusting his head to rest on the pillow.

The doctor took his hand and prodded at the right side of his stomach. Villain groaned, breathing heavily.

"He's going to need emergency surgery," the doctor said, standing up and trotting to a phone. "Nurse? I need a team of anesthesiologists for an appendectomy."

Hero grabbed Villain's hand. His forehead was creased in concern as he listened and watched the doctor's erratic movements.

"Hey, it's okay. I'll be right there with you," Hero soothed him. He seemed to relax, but his muscles did not let go of their tension.

"Okay. I am going to go get ready." The doctor left.

Soon after, a couple nurses came in and hooked Villain to an IV. He flinched, watching the small needle go into his elbow.

Hero grabbed his hand and rubbed it.

A couple more people sauntered in and injected a hypodermic needle into the IV line.

"Okay Villain, count down from ten."

"Ten... nine... eight... sev...ven...si." Villain looked over at Hero with pleading eyes before they drifted shut.

A nurse put a mask over his nose and he was wheeled away.

Hero waited in the lobby, twidling her thumb and reading health magazines. Every two minutes, literally, she would look at the clock and bite her lip.

After two hours, the doctor made his appearance.

"The surgery was successful. He is waking up now, so he will be very groggy, but his vitals are good. You can take him home."

"Don't you have to monitor him."

"Come back in two weeks for a check-up."

Hero walked into the ER and to Villain's bed. His eyes were half-lidded and he barely noted Hero's presence.

"Hey buddy," Hero cooed, stroking his head. "You scared me."

Villain didn't reply, just blinked very, very slowly. Soon, his blinks became longer until he drifted off.

Nervous, Hero called for a nurse. "Why is he sleeping?" She asked.

The nurse shrugged. "The effects of anesthesia hasn't worn off yet, so he'll be in and out for a while."

Hero nodded and sat back down.

"You can take him home, you know," the nurse said. "We don't keep villains for monitoring or over-night stays."

Hero groaned and looked at the nurse. "Well you should."

"But we don't. Please take him home, he's occupying beds that could be used for more important patients."

Hero rolled her eyes, but obeyed. She picked Villain up and helped him into his jeans, but left his shirt off to not irritate the stitches. Then, she rolled him to her truck in a wheelchair.

It was nearly midnight by the time Hero got Villain to her house and changed into something comfortable. He was dozing, but every movement seemed to awake him. He was totally and completely silent, allowing Hero to tuck him on her bed before sliding in next to him.

She wrapped her arms around Villain and pulled him in tight. He drifted off to sleep instantly, and Hero was not far behind.

When Hero awoke the next morning, she was sprawled across her bed with Villain laying on her stomach. She smiled and watched the slow rise and fall of his chest before carefully removing his head to go downstairs and prepare breakfast. After a quick research, she decided to make a bowl of pudding with toast and avacado.

Villain came down the stairs stiffly, groaning with each step, just as Hero put the bread in the toaster. She looked up just in time to see him lean heavily against the wall.

"What are you doing?" Hero scolded and gently led him to the couch to sit on.

"Heard you- engh," Villain winced, holding his side. "Downstairs."

"Okay," Hero sighed. "Do you remember anything from yesterday?"

"No not really. Just you and the hospital. Everything else is just a blank."

"You had an appendectomy," Hero explained, brushing the hair out of Villain's face. He jerked back and Hero pulled away. He was so cute and vulnerable when he was out of it.

"What's that?" Villain asked, but Hero had a sense that he knew and just wanted to fill the silence up.

"Your appendix was removed." The toaster clicked, so Hero went and grabbed the food.

Villain spooned at it for awhile before putting it towards the side. His face was pale.

"Not hungry," he said.

"You gotta eat."

"No," Villain slowly laid on the couch, his body seizing with every motion. "I'm tired..."

"Yeah, you had surgery, but please eat something so I can give you some painkillers."

Villain rolled his eyes, but allowed Hero to feed him some avocado and pudding. However, by the end of it, he was too exhausted to resist Hero putting two large pills in his mouth.

Between the pain meds and fatigue, it only took a few minutes for Villain to fall sound asleep.

Hero idly ate her own pudding and stared out the window. After finishing both her's and Villain's chocolate desert, she went to do dishes.

Then she showered.

Then she playing monopoly by herself.

And then she ate lunch.

All the while waiting for Villain to regain consciousness.

He did, eventually, and very slowly.

"How are you feeling."

"Bit dizzy," Villain admitted, rubbing his eyes. "How long was I out?"

"About," Hero looked at her phone. "Five hours, give or take one."

Villain groaned and quickly murmured an apology.

"Don't be. You are still a bit feverish and just came out of surgery."

Villain closed his eyes. Hero thought he might've fallen back asleep, but then he spoke,

"Thank you for taking care of me."

Hero smiled.

[mypoisonedvine]

ear candy || Mike Weiss x reader

summary: for a good time, call ‘candy.’  she can’t fix your life but she can distract you from it for a while.

word count: about 2k

warnings: technically not smut but definitely close enough (dirty talk/phone sex), some angst, daddy kink, a touch of degradation/objectification kink?? very subtle tho

a/n: my goal with this was to make it very dialogue heavy because I wanted it, like real phone sex, to be mostly about the words rather than anything else!  so I kept the descriptions to a minimum, hope you don’t mind…

You’d heard that more established phone sex operators had companies and screeners and services to help them disguise their number.  All you had was an ad in the paper and a landline, but it got the job done.

Technically, you had no way to know if a call from a number you didn’t recognize was a horny customer or something actually important, but it was pretty obvious when the phone rang at one in the morning on Friday night wasn’t going to be your bank or something.

You let it ring two, three, four times before picking up, putting on a slightly sultry voice as you greeted, “hey.”

“Hey,” the voice returned— so much more assured than you were used to, more confident and casual, nothing like the married men whispering to keep from waking up their wives, nothing like the nervous first-timers who made it clear that you were a mistake they would regret.  “Saw your ad in the paper…”

“I’m glad you called,” you smiled, “what’s your name?”

"Mike,” he answered quickly.  “What’s yours?”

"Hi, Mike,” you purred.  “You can call me Candy.”

“I’m not gonna call you that,” he sighed, and suddenly the air of confidence was gone; not to fear or secrecy, but to obvious weakness, to exhaustion, to an ache that you wish you didn’t understand as well as you did.  “Tell me your real name.”

“You don’t know that Candy isn’t my real name,” you defended.

“Yes I do.  Tell me your real name,” he demanded again, though his tone wasn’t actually very demanding.  You did it anyway.  “It’s pretty,” he decided, a little crack in his voice making your heart twist.

“You don't sound like you're doing too good,” you noted, trying not to make it too pitying but still sympathetic.

"My wife left me."

You nodded, to no one in particular, because you definitely knew how to handle this kind of guy, even if it had been a while since one had called.  "I'm sorry to hear that.  How can I help you?"

"I can't stand being alone," he explained tensely.

"I can definitely help with that…" you trailed off.  “I can just listen, if that’s what you need.”

“No, I... I want you to talk,” he assured, making you smirk slightly.

“Do you have a credit card, Mike?” you prompted.

“Yeah, yeah, lemme give you the number,” he mumbled, the sounds of shuffling indicated that he was searching for his wallet.

He dictated the numbers to you as you sat up and dashed to your computer, entering them in and stalling a bit until the card came back approved.  “So, Mike, tell me what’s on your mind.”

“Nothing, it’s a blank slate,” he murmured, voice lilted with a smirk.  “Wanna give me something to think about?”

“What do you wanna know?”

“Tell me what you’re wearing.”

“Not much, I was in bed when you called… so just a t-shirt.”

“Just a t-shirt?” 

“Yeah… it’s too big for me, it’s an old Cowboys shirt my ex left behind…”

“Cowboys?  You’re breakin’ my heart, honey,” he chuckled.

“You’re a Houston fan?”

“It’s a symptom of being in Houston, right now, as we speak.”

“Fair enough,” you giggled.  “Maybe I should take it off then, if it bothers you…?”

“So if my calculations are correct, that should mean you’re completely naked right now.”

“Yeah, go ahead.”

You set the phone down to remove the shirt, coming back with a chipper announcement: "Done!"

“Yep,” you agreed, popping your lips at the end of the word.

“Then do me a favor and play with your tits a little bit.  Are your nipples hard?”

“Yeah, they got hard when I heard your voice, it’s really sexy.”

“Good, give ‘em a little pinch then…   does it make you wet, when you touch them like that?”

“Mhmm, they’re really sensitive,” you admitted.

“I bet you’d love my tongue on them, wouldn’t you?  You’d like me sucking on your tits?”

“Yes,” you sighed, “please, I’d love it so much.”

“Why don’t you touch your pussy for me?” he prompted, cocky as ever.

“Tell me how, exactly,” you bargained.  “I wanna touch myself the way you would touch me.”

“Two fingers on your clit— slow, smooth circles…”

You moaned a little, following his instructions.  “Fuck, Mike, it feels really good.”

“I like when you moan my name like that.  By the end of the night you’re gonna be screaming it for me, how’s that sound?”

“Sounds like exactly what I need.”

“Yeah, I bet so, bet you really need to get fucked.  And it’s handy, then, that I really, really need to fuck something, god I’m so worked up I could just lose it.”

"Yeah?  Tell me about it."

"M'hard, so hard, can't stop thinking about what it would be like to be inside you."

"I like the sound of that.  What would you do to me, if you could?'

"I'd fuck you so good, sweetheart, until you begged me to stop because you couldn’t come anymore."

"Mmm, I bet so, you sound like you know how to fuck.”

“Hell yeah I do, and you sound like you need a thick cock.”

“Is that what you’re offering?” you hummed, biting your lip.

“If you think you can take it.”

“Fuck, I’ll try my best… it’ll probably be a pretty tight fit.”

“Good.  I wanna fucking ruin you.”

“Oh god,” you groaned, “can I please put something inside me?  Two fingers?”

“Just one,” he instructed.

You whined when you pushed one finger in and it wasn’t nearly enough to satiate your needs.  “I need more, please…”

“Okay baby, just one more but go slow, I like when you get desperate.”

After a few quiet moments where you could only hear his breathing and your own needy moans, curiosity got the better of you.  “Are you stroking your cock, Mike?” you asked softly.

“Yes,” he answered, the little strain in his voice making you confident he was telling the truth.

“How does it feel?”

“Good,” came another hasty reply.

“It would feel so much better if it was my pussy, if I was riding you right now.”

“I’d be so fucking deep in you,” he groaned tensely.  “That’s where I wanna come, too… wanna fill you up right inside that snug little cunt.”

“Oh fuck,” you whispered.  “Please, daddy…”

“What was that?  I can’t hear you,” he taunted.

“I— I said ‘please… daddy,’” you repeated, afraid it would turn him off but he let out a dark chuckle that ended with a groan and a hissing breath in through his teeth.

“Fuck, that’s hot.  Is that what you need, sweetheart?  Need daddy to take care of you?”

“Yes, please, need you…”

“Don’t worry honey, I will, just keep fucking yourself with your fingers, and don’t come until I say so.”

You whined but didn’t dare disobey, moaning with each touch to your sensitive bud, not holding any sound back so he could hear how needy you were loud and clear.

“Please, I need to come, wanna come for you, Mike,” you begged when you were starting to worry you couldn’t hold back much longer.

“I know, but not yet… almost.”

“Please, daddy” you sobbed, weak and almost a whisper, making him grunt a little.

“Just say my name when you come, honey, and don’t stop rubbing that little clit until you’re absolutely sure you can’t take any more.”

“Fuck, Mike,” you hissed.  “Oh god, I’m gonna— fuck, daddy, I’m gonna come so hard for you.”

“Good, just like that, baby, keep going,” he egged you on.

“Mike!” you yelped, shocks reverberating through your body as your back arched up off the bed.  His moans encouraged you further, echoing in your ears and somehow making everything more intense.  It was easy like this to imagine that he was on top of you, moaning in your ear as he filled you with his cock; your walls clenched around nothing, begging to be stretched around something, as you felt a gush of warmth seep from your entrance.  

Like he’d told you to, you kept going past the peak until your hands gave out, until your body was numb with pins and needles from the intensity of your pleasure.

“Oh my god,” you sighed, “that was… I haven’t come that hard in so long.”

“You sound incredible when you come, baby,” he cooed, “think you can do it again before I finish?”

“I’m too sensitive, it’ll hurt,” you whined.

“Give it a minute, then,” he chuckled.  “Did you make a mess, honey?”

“Um, a little,” you giggled.  “I’m so wet it’s dripping onto the sheets now.”

“Fuck, wish I could help you clean that up,” he purred, laughing at your little gasp.  “Would you like that?”

“Yeah, I bet you’d be good at it… you’re good with your tongue so far.”

“And you?”

“Me?  Well, I bet no matter how big you are, I could take you all the way down my throat.”

“Fuck, honey, you’re so dirty, huh?”

“Yeah, and I really like sucking cock…” you added coyly.  “Would you let me get on my knees and taste you, daddy?”

“Whenever you wanted, sweetheart, fuck… I’m close, keep going honey, you’re so fucking good.”

“Please come for me, oh my god, please come,” you moaned, “I want you to come— please daddy?”

“I will, baby, I’m gonna come… fuck, I’m so close.”

“I wish I could help you, daddy, I wish you were fucking me so hard right now, using me, making me your toy.”

“Yeah baby, you just wanna be owned, huh?  Wanna be daddy’s little slut?”

“Yours, fuck, wanna be all yours.”

“That’s it, keep talking— m’gonna come.”

“Yes, daddy, stroke that cock for me, close your eyes and imagine I’m there with you, begging for your come… I want it all in me, daddy, I want it leaking out of me all night, please please please come, please come inside me—”

“Fuck!” he yelped, moaning louder than ever.

“Yes, keep going, fuck, you sound so hot,” you encouraged, “give me all that fucking come, daddy.”

A throaty, exhausted groan preceded a sigh as he began to catch his breath, making you smile pridefully.

“Shit,” he hissed, “I have to clean this up all by myself, huh?”

“Yeah, that’s the less fun part,” you sighed.

“You’re good,” he offered, voice still breathy as he panted a little bit.  “Thanks, that really… that helped.”

“Feeling a little better, daddy?”

“God, don’t say it like that,” he groaned, “you’re just gonna get me goin’ again.”

“Maybe that’s what I want.”

“What you want is to take all my money by keeping me on the phone all night,” he chuckled.

“Okay, I’ll let you go,” you relented.  “I bet you’re gonna sleep well tonight.”

“Better than I have in months,” he agreed.

"Will you call me again sometime?"

A little pause made you worried he wouldn’t.  "Maybe we could meet up instead?" he offered hesitantly.

"Different price than talking on the phone…" you warned him.

"Yeah, I know, that's fine," he dismissed.  “We’ll work that out later.  But maybe you could come to my motel room?”

“I can do that,” you grinned.  “You talk a big game, I’m looking forward to finding out if you can live up to my expectations.”

“Oh, sweetheart, you’re gonna regret saying that.  You won’t be able to walk when I’m done with you.”

You laughed a little, clenching your thighs together.  “Promises, promises…”