#i might be fucking myself over for the rest of the night but bro i cant take the vertigo anymore. give me the alcohol

[cillyscribbles]

                         🕯

                🕯             🕯

          🕯                          🕯

              tequila sunrise

    🕯   fix my withdrawal   🕯

          and also make this

  🕯      munkustrap i'm        🕯

            drawing rn serve

      🕯     so much cunt      🕯

          🕯                          🕯

                🕯             🕯

                         🕯

[octuscle]

Late Night Possession

Inspired by @malevessel

It was a terrible day. Meetings that dragged on like chewing gum. The air conditioning in the meeting room was faulty, it was well over 30 degrees Celsius outside, much higher inside and the humidity wasn't much below 100 percent. I hate it when lawyers suddenly join us at the end of a project. They talk everything up without even having understood for five cents what it was all about. And my client's in-house counsel was not only annoying, he also stank from the mouth and smelled terribly of sweat. The air in the meeting room was stifling. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief when we thought we were finally finished at 8pm. And then the pain in the ass said he had a few more questions….

It was really lucky that I got the last train home. I still had a three-hour journey ahead of me. It would be 02:00 when I was finally in bed. What a day! But I would take a nap now. The train was almost empty, I was sitting in the rest area, no one would disturb me.

"Hey bro, I swear! The bitch was begging for mercy. And then I fucked her all the more!" I am rudely torn from my reverie. Two seats away, a guy has sat down. A migrant with Arab roots, I'd say. Not a Muslim, because he doesn't perform ablutions. It smells of sweat and tobacco. The guy is on the phone at 11:30 at night in the train's rest area. On the phone? No, he's shouting. Without a headset of course, I can hear his "bro" on the other end just as well as I can hear him. And the guy is smoking. On the train. That's all I really needed today to be happy.

I may look weak. I am weak. Sport was never my thing. But I'm not anxious. Even if the guy has arms that make my legs look skinny. But he's not allowed to use the phone here. And he's certainly not allowed to smoke here. I stand up. I go to him. He only looks at me for a split second and immediately turns his attention back to his conversation partner. "Excuse me, this is a non-smoking train and you are in the rest area… So may I ask you…" BAAAAANNG! His fist hits me without any warning. My eyes go black.

Shit, why does my fist hurt? Shouldn't my head be hurting? I rub my fist. And see myself. On the floor. Knocked out. Shit! Shit! Shit! I look in the window. At my reflection. A migrant with Arab roots. "Yo dude, you good? Yo bro, spill the tea, what's the 411?" I hear from the cell phone. I pick up the phone, say that everything is okay, but that I have to take care of something here and hang up. I lie on the floor and sniffle. So it's the other one. Or is it me? Damn it! What's happened here? Take it easy now. This is a dream. I have brain trauma or something… What would I really do now if I were in that bastard's body? I'm like remote-controlled. I take my wallet out of my jacket pocket. I take my watch, the gold cufflinks and my glasses. I put everything in my laptop bag. The next station is coming. And I jump out of the train. I need a cigarette now. I don't smoke, but my body is obviously addicted to that shit. There's a Zippo and filterless Marlboros in my bomber jacket. I'm still a bit inexperienced with it, I have tobacco crumbs on my tongue. But the smoke feels good. So good. And my head is finally starting to work properly again.

Okay, I'm in the middle of nowhere in Stoke-on-Trent. Shit, I've got the belongings of a man who's been knocked out on a train to Manchester. I'm going to need money. I take the money out of my wallet, take the credit cards and pull the maximum amount out of the ATM in the deserted station concourse with each one. According to the departure board, there's a train back to London in ten minutes. The platform is empty. I get on, leave the laptop bag with everything that might remind me of myself in an empty compartment and quickly get off again. The train departs. Shit, shit, shit! I need one more cigarette first. I smoke the second one much more routinely on the station forecourt. Opposite the station is a somewhat shabby-looking hotel. While I'm thinking about going in there, a bus arrives. Destination Birmingham. Without thinking twice, I get on the bus. Birmingham. I drove through there a few hours ago. In a completely different body. I fall asleep.

It's dawn when my cell phone wakes me up. The phone of the guy who knocked me out. Mine after all. Shit, I'm not awake yet and the situation is challenging. The phone isn't vibrating discreetly, it's quite loud. BILLY TSTRK as the ringtone. One of my favorite hip-hop artists. He's also from Beirut. It's my buddy Dylan. He asks if everything's okay because I haven't been in touch. I say I've had a bit of stress with the wanker on the train and am now on the bus to Birmingham rather than Manchester. Dylan says cool, he'll tell Hamza and he'll pick me up at the bus. "You're a man of honor, I'll kiss your eye!" I say and hang up.

It's 05:30. I've been on the phone with Facetime. Without a headset. Several pairs of eyes stare at me in annoyance. "laenat alfilastiniiyn alkufaar" I curse and close my eyes again.

Had to go into hiding for a few weeks. The police were looking for me. Of course, there were surveillance cameras at the station. As far as I know, my old body is in a mental hospital. The story of the investment banker who suffered brain trauma after being mugged on a night train and then thought he was his tormentor was in the press. Not that I still read the papers. But it even appeared on Yasin's Instagram account, which is now my account.

My boys had to get used to it a bit. The investment banker is still in me. And that's a good thing. As Yasin, I have a pretty complex company to run. Import, export, all sorts of different stuff. I wash the money in investments in shisha bars and fitness studios. Hey, I only invest in things I know something about. And I practically live on the weight bench and in the shisha lounge area. Even though I think shisha sucks. I'll stick to cigarettes.

[makethemhoesmad]

drunk in love

@cjrights horny

paige’s pov

this wasn’t gonna be smut but then the parasites

—

“paige, bro, someone’s knocking on your door like crazy.” ice tells me, reclining her chair.

i hop up off the couch and open the door, hearing the erratic knocking ice had been talking about. 

“Paigey! Baby i missed you so fucking much” i can’t believe i forgot to watch my girlfriend’s location until her uber dropped her off. might i add, she looks fucking amazing too, i should have gone with her. that purple, silky dress that i bought for her fits her too damn well.

“yeah, um, i missed you too baby,” i say, noticing as her eyes flicker over my body, and as her thighs squeeze together just slightly. she grabs at my t-shirt, pulling my mouth to hers

“needed you so bad all night paige, then i come home and you have people over” i try to turn around, perfectly willing to kick kk and ice out so i can have time with my girl, but she pulls my chin back to hers. i bring my hands to rest on her hips, partially to steady myself.

“but i think they can stay, alright? i’ll just sit with you on the couch.” 

this girl and the things she does to me. i walk back into the living room holding her in front of me by her hips. she waves to the girls, and they wave back, shooting me the “should we leave?” glance. i shrug, and turn my attention back to my girlfriend, who’s trying to pull me on the couch while trying to unfold a blanket.

i bite my lip, looking at the slight sheen of sweat on her skin, and the thin silk strap slipping from her shoulder to her arm.

“WOAH, alright paige, back to what we were talking about, please direct your eyes this way,” kk says, jolting me out of my not child-friendly thoughts.

i plop down onto the couch, pulling my girl with me and draping a blanket over us.

“not the blanket game,” ice says with an eye roll. i return it, then wrap my arms around the girl that has currently turned into a koala bear.

“you comfy down there baby?” i muse, running my hand through the hair at the top of her head. she nods, then rotates her hips against mine, letting me feel that she’s absolutely soaked under that dress. i pull her chin up so she has to face me, eyes looking so hazy and innocent for someone so nasty. i push my forehead against hers, sighing contentedly as she whispers,

“i’m not wearing any panties baby” 

“well, ice, we’re leaving now, bye paige, bye paige’s girl, we’re out.”

i grin as they leave, then stand up, making sure we both make it into the bedroom before i hike up her dress and bury my face between her thighs. she moans, but i hardly hear it. i’m too lost in the taste of her fucking perfect pussy, that came home aching for me, and only me. she comes on my tongue quickly.

“you’re so perfect, princess,” i say, pulling her dress up over her head, then removing my own t-shirt. 

“nuh uh. off.” she snaps, tugging at my sweatpants and mouthing at my nipple through my bra. she knows just how to get what she wants out of me, and i strip down to nothing, just like her. we curl into the covers, skin to skin, her drunk in love, me drunk on love.

[bluecollarmcandtf]

Am I Acting Weird?

Part II

I've been jogging on this treadmill for over an hour now. Cardio sucks, and I hate this old unventilated gym! When I joined the football team, I did it for the parties and cheerleaders! I just wanted to drink with the cool guys and get laid. I still do, but I haven't had a drop of alcohol in weeks. I can't even remember the last girl I hooked up with!

I used to think it was weird that I was suddenly working out all the time. It was like my entire personality had changed overnight.

I know it's not weird now. Max, my younger brother, told me so. I have to keep working out until I become the quarterback of the football team. Then I have to bulk up and train even more, so I can become a professional footballer. That's my new goal in life, and I can't wait for my little bro to be able to brag about being related to a pro athlete.

Sure, I never really wanted to play football professionally. If it were up to me, I'd be out drinking with my buds, but it's not up to me.

That's not weird right?

I shake my head and slow my aching legs. Droplets of sweat run down my face as I work to control my breathing. My whole body is sore from the conditioning. It doesn't help that this is my third workout of the day. Between my morning weight session, afternoon field practice, and this, I am totally whipped.

I stagger over to grab my workout gear. My night isn't over. I still have to bulk my stomach up for tomorrow.

With a frustrated sigh, I stomp out of the gym and march directly into the diner next door. I nod to the greasy cook behind the counter. I've become a regular here, so he knows me pretty well.

"The usual?" he grunts with a toothy grin.

I nod and sink into a booth.

Max, my little brother, got tired of me eating at the house. Apparently, it took our father too long to cook my bulking meals. Max has me eat here after my workouts, and I completely agree. Max shouldn't have to share our dad with me. He deserved to have someone at home cooking whenever he wanted to eat.

"Four burgers, fries, and a soda," the cook snickers as he slaps the tray in front of me, "A growing boy needs extra protein."

I grimace and turn away from the chef. His breath alone is enough to make me lose my appetite, but I take a big bite and swallow. I won't gain mass if I'm not consuming mass, and I obviously need to get bigger.

I've broken out into a second sweat by the time I'm done. Forcing myself to up, I have to adjust to my bloated waist. You'd think I'd get used to a packed stomach, but I always feel uncomfortable for the rest of the night.

I let out a belch and carry the dirty dishes to the back. It always feels weird strolling into an employees-only area like this, but it's part of how I get my meals for free. You see, the cook let's is nice as long as I take care of two things.

The dishes are the first thing.

"Leave the dishes," I hear his husky voice behind me, "I never wash 'em anyways."

I drop the dishes and turn the sink off, holding my gut as it growls in pain. My belly might ache, but I've got one more thing to do.

The cook watches me expectantly. He licks his chapped lips, and grabs at the bulge under his apron, between his two trunks of legs. He's already fishing the thing out. I know what he wants, so I drop to the floor. This has become just another part of my daily routine.

It's how I thank the chef.

I don't know how this became a habit, because I absolutely do not enjoy it! The man is filthy, and a man! I'm not gay! I like women, but I have to eat a lot to bulk up and Max liked the idea of me eating for free. It's not weird!

I let him manhandle me a bit, gripping my head and pulling my hair. The cook gets off faster if he roughs me up a little. He usually only lasts a few minutes, but it's the longest few minutes of the day.

It's not sex. It's just a transaction!

"Oh, yeah!" he growls with his eyes squeezed shut, "Yeah, boy! Fuck!"

I whip my head off his hairy crotch and jump to my feet. I spit into a napkin and wipe my mouth quickly. I know from experience that I won't be able to get the taste of sweat and meat out of my mouth until I brush my teeth thoroughly at home.

My part is finally done here, so I just want to leave!

"Can't wait to see you tomorrow morning, jocky boy!" he laughs, but I've already stormed out, marching down the street to my house. I'm trying not to think about how I'll be seeing him in a few hours for breakfast.

"Hey dad," I mumble, stepping inside.

"Boy," he answers dismissively, not even looking up from his work. As usual, he's wearing his home uniform: a suit and white gloves. I have a similar outfit for when I'm hanging around the house, but dad gets a lot more use out of his now that I'm constantly bulking up. Max is really the only one who seems to dress casually around here anymore.

I guess that makes him the weird one.

"What are you doing?" I ask, trying to start up a conversation.

"What's it look like, boy?" he answers gruffly, "I'm cleaning up after Max and his guests. Now, either get your uniform on and help or get out of my way."

His attitude makes me cringe a bit. Dad and I used to be really tight. We used to bond over sports and craft beer, but he doesn't really care about anything besides Max anymore.

I don't think he's gone to any of my games for the last few months. He's always cooking or cleaning for Max. I wish I understood. We used to tease Max all the time together, but now he gets angry anytime I try and bond with him. Like, it's totally normal and right for Max to be his new favorite, but I wish we could still chat every now and then.

"Sorry," I mutter.

My father ignores me and heads off to the kitchen in a rush. He looks erratic, and I can tell he's just as exhausted as I am. He's made it a habit of working extra hours at the office everyday. It's so he can bring home the biggest paycheck he can earn every week, but I know is affecting his sleep.

"Where is Max?" I ask.

My dad frowns, tersely responding, "Max took his guests to a movie in my car. The house needs to be clean and snacks need to be ready for when Max gets back."

"Oh," I sigh, "Are his friends staying over again? I'd stay up with you and help serve them, but Max said I should be getting nine hours of sleep every night."

"Go to bed, boy. I'll handle it," he states firmly, putting the final touches on the silver platter.

With that, my father picks up the tray of assorted snacks and walks them out into the living room. There he takes his place by the door and stands in his usual position. It's where he normally waits to welcome Max home everyday. Father and I know that someone like Max shouldn't have to put their own coat away or take off their own shoes.

"Alright, dad, see you tomorrow."

He doesn't answer. He's already standing still as a statue and probably won't move until Max gets back. Hopefully, my little brother won't keep him up too late.

Sleep won't be hard for me to find. I can barely keep my eyes open, and I pass out as soon as I fall on my bed. The rest of the night is a deep and dreamless void, while my stomach processes all the food I ate.

When I wake up, I find dad like this...

"Dad? Dad!" I give his shoulder a nudge.

He jumps to life, jerking his eyes around the trashed living room.

"Did you fall asleep standing up?"

"Maybe," he answers with shock, "Max had me holding everyone's coats while they enjoyed some beer. They must have moved to the bed while I drifted off."

"Aren't they a little young for beer?"

"Max and his guests are welcome to my alcohol whenever they want it!" he snaps back at me.

"Geez, ok."

"You have a workout you need to get to, boy," he barks, "And I'm going to have to hurry if I'm going to clean up this mess before work."

I stare at my father as he scrambles to clean up the living room once again. He looks even more exhausted and disheveled than last night. Hopefully, he would be able to clean everything up with enough time to shower and shave. I know that all of the household stuff is his responsibility, but sometimes it seems like too much.

With a shrug, I turn and step out of the door. My day is going to be the same miserable routine as the last. I'm not looking forward to any of it, but that's not weird. Like Max said, I'll just keep my head down, and power through.

[mustainegf]

This idea came to me and I needed to write it bro

SUMMARY: Looking through his friends drawer for a shirt she’d borrowed from him, Dave finds something else hidden. A vibrator. This is the very thing that encourages him to shut himself in the bathroom, bringing the toy along with him.

WARNINGS: Sex toy male & female use, masturbation, mutual masturbation, kinda perverted Dave,

As I rifled through her drawers, searching for one of my shirts, that's when I saw it. Smooth, white silicone. With quirked brows and interest, I reached for the unknown object.

I pulled it out, eying it for a second before I realized what it was. Its a vibrator.

I've seen them before, but not like this. This one is small and thin, made for discreetness and silence.

It had three different modes, a red light for power and it looked new. Ilet out a low chuckle, a mixture of surprise and curiosity. She never showed any interest in such things before, yet here it is.

What a filthy girl, keeping this littletoy to herself.

My dick was stirring to life in my pants at the thought of her using the toy in my hand.

Sure, it felt a little wrong to be staring at something of hers that was so private, but my cock was aching harder as the seconds passed.

I couldn't help but wonder how many times she had used it. I pressed the button and the soft vibrations met my palm. Not too strong, not too weak. Just right. I could almost picture her in bed, basked in the dark of the night, moaning out my name as she pressed the toy to her most sensitive spots.

| I gulped, my bulge becoming uncomfortable.

Fuck it.

I quickly shut the drawer, heading to her small bathroom. She was downstairs watching tv, surely she wouldn't find out, as long as I was quick.

Ilocked myself into the small room, sitting down on the closed toilet, the vibrator still buzzing in my grasp.

I took a deep breath, unfastening my pants. She would never know, after all. My reddened and aching cock sprang up, begging to be inside her.

Sadly I'd have to do with just my hand.

The head of my cock brushed over the base of my belly, already dripping with precum. The little whimpers leaving me were loud, my eyes rolling back as I stroked my member.

I took her vibrator, running it up my length. I wasn't prepared for the sensations it would bring, forcing another whine from me.

The buzzing was powerful. I wondered how often she used this thing. I continued to jerk myself off, my other hand pressing the vibrator to my tip.

I quickened my hand, imagining her playing with herself, forcing the vibrator into her tight pussy.

I ran the toy down my balls, shivering as the head of my cock ached with need.

I knew what I wanted. I wanted to fuck my own hand while the vibrator took care of the rest. It felt wicked. Filthy. And so damn good. I rocked my hips, feeling the seat underneath me creak.

I shook with determination, my fist pumping my cock with so much pressure, I thought I might fall to my knees and spill my cum all over. But I didn’t give in yet, I enjoyed it.

I relished in the idea of the very toy that I pressed to my length had been inside her countless times. I could almost picture her creamy juices dripping from her hole as she would dip the toy back inside her gummy walls.

I shuddered at the thought, my dick straining in my hand.

"Dave, are you okay in her-“ the door opened as she leaned inside, her jaw dropping at the sight.

I dropped her vibrator, it still buzzed on the white tile flooring. "I- fuck, I'm sorry," I stammered, by cheeks going hot. She stared as her own vibrator buzzed on the floor, my cock stood straight up and leaking.

Her eyes darted up to mine, then to her toy, and then to my desperate erection. "Why do you have my vibrator?" she asked, her voice slightly panicked.

I couldn't help but notice she was staring at my dick. That's when everything tumbled out. "I- I'm sorry, I found it on accident, and, uh I... I started thinking, um, about you using it, fuck, I just couldn't stop myself." I admitted, squeezing the base of my cock just at the sight of her. I couldn’t believe I was stupid enough to tell her that.

She only smirked, watching me as I was so vulnerable, my cock twitching.

She rolled her eyes bending over to pick up the toy and shut it off. "You're too cute, Mustaine." She remarked as I tried to cover my dick.

"Come to bed, I'll show you how you're supposed to use it..." she grinned, stepping out of the bathroom.

I bit my lip, my heart beating rapidly in my chest.

Did she really mean what she said?

I sat up quickly, leaving my jeans and boxers on the floor. I looked like an idiot, in my t shirt, my dick standing proud in attention, but I needed her.

She'd just let me watch her play with herself? My cock grew harder at the idea as I quickly made my way out of the bathroom and back into her room.

She was laid back, squirming softly. My heart sped at the sight. She had stripped out of her pants and underwear, her delicate fingers rubbing her clit.

Oh god, I was going to lose my mind. I cleared my throat, as I kneeled onto the bed, my gaze locked on her gorgeous pussy. "Please," she rasped, glancing at me with those big eyes. "Oh God, Dave please." She teased.

I clenched my jaw, my hand finding my cock, pumping myself slowly as I watched her play with herself.

I reached to touch her dripping slit, but she held my hand back. "No touching. Not after you jerked off with my toy," she taunted, grabbing the vibrator. "If you can sit and watch, maybe I'll let you touch," she said softly.

"Oh, God," I groaned, unable to control myself. She bit her lip, her soft hair fanning around her face.

She turned on the vibrator, slowly sliding it past her wetness, she did this all while staring at me.

The power exchange shocked me. She controlled me, controlled her pleasure. I gritted my teeth, pumping myself in time with her touch.

She pressed the toy to her hole, whining as she did so, "ohh, Dave..."

her voice cracked. My eyes rolled to the back of my head, my body tensing. I had to stop. I wouldn't last long like this.

But the look on her face... her beautiful face. As if she was in pain, yet wanting more. I couldn't leave her like this. She was desperate for release. "Fuck, baby," I growled, pumping my cock faster.

She gasped, moving the toy deeper. She wanted it.

She needed it.

I kept my gaze on her, willing her to keep going. "Good girl, cum for me, I'm almost there," I told her, stroking faster.

Her thighs trembled, her hands gripping the sheets as she came, her body arching, her back bowing. "Ohhh!" she screamed, the walls of her pussy contracting. She was beautiful.

"You're gonna make me cum.." I whined.

She smiled at me, giving her breasts a purposeful squeeze.

I couldn't take it anymore. I stroked harder, faster, cumming hard and quick. I groaned, releasing my seed all over her stomach and hips. I kept my eyes locked on her as I enjoyed the final waves of my orgasm.

I shuddered again, looking down at her perfect body, soaked in my cum.

“That’s it, you look so pretty covered in my cum…” I panted, unable to boil my eyes away from her.

"Do you wanna fuck me now?" She asked with a snicker.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA Kicking my brother's gf's shoes every night? This is stupid and petty and I almost definitely am but curious how much of a dick I'm being.

My younger brother's gf has been staying with us most of the week for close to a year now. She doesn't officially live here, it's just constant, several day long "sleepovers", but she makes herself at home and helps herself to food that I bought for myself, borrows my things without asking (she took my fucking boots!! I had to walk to an appointment in ankle deep snow in slides), she takes over an hour the bathrooms in the mornings + long ass baths whenever, and when she's bored and my brother's not home she'll just come into my room. She's a very nice person overall, I've known her since she was little and I think she just sees herself as part of our family and has gotten overly comfortable, I'm just tired of having her around me constantly. But if I say anything it'll probably start shit with my brother + I legit don't want to hurt her feelings worse than I have.

To get to the shoe thing, she leaves her shoes right in front of the door and I usually trip over them when I come home from work. One day I just kicked them across the room, and now that's been part of my routine when I come home.

Originally she and my bro just assumed it was our cats, but now she's thinking it might be one of my parents being passive aggressive about her being here too much. AITA to keep kicking her shoes and making her feel unwanted in our house? I'm nice to her the rest of the time which might just make this worse.

What are these acronyms?

[0zzysaurus]

I don’t know too much about Wreck-Gar but I love him and his Tv talk, and Hotrod/Rodimus is underrated so uh…*looks at you with my big eyes from around the corner

Everything, I wanna know,,,

THANK GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

To be fair, I chose a bad time to ask for asks because mannnn the WORK I need to be doing right now… I’ll throw out some silly headcanons I have :]]

• So I generally ship them kinda platonically? Kinda not. They’re besties in my eyes. Absolute ride-or-die best friends til the end. May that friendship occasionally involve a little bit of making out, as totally-just-best-friends tend to do? Perhaps… May it involve a little bit of uhhh, let’s say exploration? Possibly… I mean, name a pair of best friends that don’t bone each other after one too many Energon cubes and a long night of giddily enjoying one another’s company? Exactly.

• Junkions in my mind are so crazy with the public displays of affection it’s wild. They’re hugging and kissing and dancing with total strangers in TF1986, you’re telling me they aren’t going ham on each other? I don’t have to repeat myself about the planet-wide polycule thing with Wreck-Gar the leader at the top of the pecking order, but I do think that the hivemind mentality may have ramifications for Wreckrod as a ship. By that I mean, I think Wreck’s very special friendship with Hot Rod may also translate to the rest of the clan. If Hot Rod had to say it himself, “This is my boyfriend, and my boyfriends one hundred thousand sparkmates who protect me with their lives.” I have very complex thoughts about how the Junkions function in general and how they came about, as well as the viability of them not having access to Wreck for long periods of time, but I’ve found ways to let the Junkions continue on as normal while their leader goes off on silly adventures with his pal. That way is, they have set work schedules planned millennia in advance. They’ll be just fine for a couple of years, but it might cause some unexpected sparkache in Wreck to be gone for too long.

• Going in with my favourite — When they first met and Hot Rod gave him the universal greeting, Wreck had absolutely no fucking idea what it meant. Like, it would be so ridiculously funny if his recollection of their first meeting was essentially — he saw a really handsome red and orange robot talk utter gibberish right to his face and thought “wow fr?? You’re saying total nonsense rn?????? That’s crazy of you let’s be best friends forever and ever and ever”. A whole relationship built on stupidity <3

• I’m always thinking about that dip they do when they’re dancing… Why’d you do that, Roddy? Why’d you cradle that giant manifold robot in ur arms and dip him ballroom-dance-style like that? A question I’ll never have an answer to, but one that I like to think about often…

• Oh? An absolute banger nickname headcanon? Wreck calls Hot Rod “Rodney” because why wouldn’t a cockney TV-talking robot name his new bestie after the bloke off Only Fools and Horses? Way easier to say that over “Rodimus Prime” at the very least. Not to mention, like, how absolutely drop-dead adorable is that for a nickname? C’mon now… It’s SO cute. They meet up again after a long time apart at some Council of Worlds ambassador meeting, everything has been so formal and respectable so far, and out bounds this Junkion who is so excited he’s shouting the silliest human-orientated nickname for a Prime. What a goober. No social decorum. Probably tackle-hugs him too. If he’s gonna do that to a total stranger in Collect and Save (TFLegends 2004) then I can’t see why he wouldn’t absolutely knock his bestie to the ground in front of every diplomat in the galaxy.

• In G1 S3, when Wreck shows up again for the first time in the cartoon, Ultra Magnus has no idea what he’s talking about (for obvious reasons, bro is talking TV…). But not only does Rodimus understand him perfectly, he can translate! Bilingual king moment for Roddy, but also I like the idea that they actually chat over comms all the time and Rodimus has got really good at understanding TV-Talk, though maybe with a little bit of help from Kup as well, since he also knows a few phrases here and there. Maybe he “studies” TV as well so he can expand his vocabulary for his buddy? I bet on trips to Cybertron it can get a little awkward or distressing when no one understands what Wreck is trying to say, but Roddy is there coming in clutch to translate.

• I think it would be cute if all the Junkions developed a sort of shyness to Cybertronians after a while. It becomes a little too obvious when you hang out with Autobots all the time that your frame is just spare parts and scrap metal, so Wreck likes to be in motorcycle-mode more often than not. That’s okay though, because being his partner’s off-road ride to anywhere means they’re always together on adventures. I think it would be silly if we get a couple centuries in and Rodimus’ current companion group don’t even realise that his motorcycle is a sentient bot. Like, oh, isn’t it weird that our captain sleeps in the garage with his motorcycle? Isn’t it weird that he speaks to it and pets it and gave it a name? They probably assume the TV-talk is quite literally just radio babble that happens to occasionally line up with what Rodimus is saying. That’ll be a fun surprise for everyone when suddenly this big ol’ Junkion appears and starts manhandling their leader.

Anyways, I REALLY need to do my work, so that’s all u get for now. If you have any specific prompts or scenarios I would he VERY HAPPY to provide answers :]]

[nerdthatsiriuslylovesteaxx]

Helpless parts 1-10, it's it strange how nothing's changed

Nico was finally allowed to leave the infirmary, he'd been stuck there for three days because of Solace since apparently he 'was about to turn into a puddle of darkness'. He was mainly alone for the most part which was fine with him, but the Apollo kid wouldn't leave him alone half the time, Nico knew it was his job and everything but with the amount of people in the infirmary after the war you would think he has something more important to do. Nico was on his way to cabin 13 when he was intercepted by Annabeth and Percy,

"Hey Nico, it's camp fire time. You can't avoid social situations forever, you might actually enjoy it. Come with us." Percy said brightly almost like there wasn't a war three days ago, Nico was about to decline but for whatever reason decided to go. A decision he was sure he would regret in a hours time but still he replied,

"Sure why not."

***

Nico sat down next to Annabeth, gods what is wrong with me? Nico thought to himself as more people arrived; he was very quickly starting to regret his decision but he thought he'd try to stay. Annabeth gave him a smile and leaned over.

"Nico I promise you'll love it," she said quietly hugging him. Nico normally hated being touched but now it was strangely fine; the only reason Nico stayed was for Annabeth and he did end up kind of enjoying it. Everyone was singing loudly and they all seemed happy, forgetting momentarily about all that happened just a few days ago. Then he heard Will Solace sing, his voice sounded angelic which was surprising for someone so stubborn and annoying but hey people surprise you sometimes he thought to himself. The night passed and Nico was actually happy he had come; as he returned to his cabin with Hazel, but as hard as he tried he couldn't get his mind off of Will Solace.

---

"Morning Haze," Nico said the just as he woke up.

"Here we have a true miracle occurrence the Nico di Angelo is awake before 11am is this the real di Angelo or is it really a fake." Hazel said in a teasing voice, it was nice to be back with her.

"Very funny Hazel," Nico said petting her on the head. "Anyway how much longer do I have with you until you go to back to New Rome?"

"I'm leaving today at 10pm, after campfire." She responded hugging Nico. "I'm gonna go get breakfast, cya later bro." Walking out the door, right after that there's a knock on the door. Nico opens it reluctantly and saw Solace outside the door,

"Great you haven't left yet. Can you come back to the infirmary tonight at 5 and do that every Friday for the rest of the month? I was asking Reyna and Annabeth and they said you'd shadow traveled a lot recently which isn't good for you, also-"

"-No underworldly stuff, just because I'm out of the infirmary doesn't mean I'm okay and I have a bunch of deficiencies. Solace I know, you don't have to worry, I'm not too big a fan of passing out myself. Yeah I'll come down at five, I don't see any use coming till the end of the month but you're too stubborn and I do not have the energy to argue with you today." Nico finishes his sentence,

"Okay great, that was surprisingly easy. Bye Nico I'll see you this afternoon." He says smiling as he closes the door behind him, Nico realised that he was smiling and cursed under his breathe in Italian. There is no way he liked that annoying doctor but the only thing he could think about were his bright blue eyes and how they look like the ocean. How his hair was perfectly golden and he was almost glowing in the sunlight, fuck, no, he couldn't do this again. He couldn't like anyone again, that would mean he has to tell people, what if they abandoned him? These are the times he sadly requires advice from Jason Grace.

***

Nico knocked on the door of his cabin hoping he hadn't left yet, he get lucky.

"Hey Grace, can I talk to you?" Nico asked stepping inside, Jason was (aside from Percy and Annabeth) the only one who knew.

"Yeah sure," Jason said calmly, Nico was thankful he still wanted to talk to him considering last time they tried to have this conversation Nico swore he would never talk to him again.

"Well, um.. I feel like I should tell the rest of the seven and Reyna. Percy and Annabeth already know-" Nico starts but is interrupted by Jason pulling him into a hug.

"Oh sorry, I forgot you don't like being touched I'm just proud of you." Jason say's quickly.

"It's fine, I'm trying to get used to human contact. Just I also wanted to tell you, I like this guy...and he's so stubborn and annoying but at the same time I want him to be mine. It's....Will Solace and I just...yeah." Nico finishes, slightly blushing after and rushing the part about Will Solace.

"Nico I'm so proud of you for wanting to tell them, and if any of them react badly I will personally strike them with lightning while simultaneously getting Percy to drown them. But they won't , these people love and care about you Nico they won't hurt you. As for Will Solace, well I know he's friends with Leo but not much else, I don't really see him much but he's a cool guy. Good luck mate." Jason says keeping his voice stable and calm as always,

"Thank you Jason, I guess I should go and talk to the other five now." Nico says hugging Jason, it was kind of shocking but Jason didn't show his surprise.

“Good luck Nico, I promise it’ll go well.”

“Wait, um, could you please come with me? I was going to ask Annabeth but-“

“Yeah of course I’ll come with you.”And with that the ghost king and Superman were off.

***

“Guys umm… can I talk to you?” Nico said walking up to Reyna, Leo, Hazel, Frank and Piper, finding them sitting under a tree.

“Sure di Angelo, what’s up?” Leo said hiding his shock that Nico di Angelo was willingly talking to someone who wasn’t Hazel, much more with Jason standing beside him. He looked like he was barely breathing so Jason placed a hand on his shoulder, whispering something in his ear. Nico (much to Leo’s surprise) smiled and continued, “Well….shit.., Jason I can't.” Nico says shaking.

"Breathe di Angelo."

"I fucking can't, what if they-"

"-I promise they won't react badly."

"That's what I thought about- doesn't matter."

"I know it's hard, especially after living in the 1930s for most of your childhood. Nico, are you sure you want to tell everyone, you're shaking."

"I SAW PEOPLE GET KILLED FOR IT, what....what if they hate me?"

"You don't have to tell them if you don't want to."

"I want to I'm just, scared."

"They care about you di Angelo, I swear on the River of Styx they won't hate you." Nico took a deap breath and continued.

"I'm..I'm gay.." he tenses up, waiting for someone to call him a fag and yell that he was going to burn and potentially try to kill him. After no such reaction he continued,"Also I may or may not have fallen for that insufferable doctor, Solace. Percy and Annabeth already know,” Nico turns around and hugs Jason,

“Good job Nico; damn three hugs in one day. You’re progressing,” Nico was tempted to yell ‘shut up Grace’ but decided against it. He broke the hug with Jason after he was able to keep his breathing under control, suddenly he was suffocated by a hug from Piper and Hazel

“Can’t. Breathe.” Nico muttered quietly and the girls let go,

“Thank you for telling us,” Piper said “I’ll look into Will for you.” She grinned walking off giving the siblings some privacy,

“I proud of you for telling us.” Hazel said hiding a grin,

“You don't hate me? You already knew didn’t you?” Nico asks,

“Well I had some suspicions.” Hazel said smiling,

“How? I didn’t talk to anyone?” Nico says failing to suppress his laughter,

“Younger sister magic. Also Nico why would I hate you?"

"Bianca..."

"Nico, you're my brother, I couldn't hate you. I can't imagine what you've gone through but I'll always be here for you."

"Thank you Hazel, I love you."

"Love you to bro." Hazel smiled and kissed Nico on the cheek, by then Jason was talking to Leo.

“Nico, I’m proud of you. Hope Solace likes you back, maybe impress him with Jules-Albert. If anyone hurts you because of it then I will send the Roman Legions on them. ” Reyna said, messing up his long black hair that went a couple of inches past his shoulders before leaving not giving Nico time to reply. Nico smiled, pathetic, I haven't smiled this much since I was ten year old he thought to himself.

"Di Angelo! I'm warning you about Will, his sense of humor is worse than mine and Percy's combined and do not and I mean do not ask him to sing unless you are prepared to listen to him for three hours. Also um.. good job on telling us," Leo said patting Nico on the back.

"Thanks for the advice Valdez, but I'm not sure it is possible for someone to have a worse sense of humor than you." Nico said bluntly yet still smirking,

"Good luck on Solace, Nico. Proud of you for telling us, if anyone ever gives you shit I'll turn into a poisonous snake and kill them. Everyone will think it was an accident." Frank says so seriously that Nico almost shakes, Nico has to look up to meet his eye. Frank was a foot taller than him,

"Thanks Frank, but let's try to avoid murder for now." Nico smiled, this was going much better than he expected.

"Thanks for coming with me Grace." Nico said,

"No problem Nico, I'll catch you later yeah?

***

It was almost five and Nico had embarrassingly spent the whole day thinking about Will Solace, he was stubborn and got on his nerve but he was cute in a way. Nico headed to the infirmary where Will Solace stood there waiting for him,

"Hey Nico." Wil called out brightly,

"Hello Solace." Nico said coldly, this Apollo kid could not know anything. Will did the routine of lecturing him about how he needs to eat more, his severe vitiam D deficiencies, iron deficiencies and about twenty more that could never remember.

"Okay so, I'm giving you some vitamins. Take this one with breakfast and the blue one before you sleep, also I looked through the tests you did. You have PTSD and depression, I would recommend therapy but then you would send an army of skeletons after me, pass out and potentially die and I really don't want you to die. I think we have reached a level of kind of friendship and would not like you to die right now, take one of these a day first thing in the morning with water before you eat anything." Will said walking around the room picking up three different containers and placing them on a table in front of Nico.

"Solace I'm fine. I'm not taking them." Nico spoke bluntly,

"Yes you are, doctors orders. I will be telling your sister to make sure you take them and after she leaves I'll make sure you do." Will respond firmly,

"Solace you aren't my father, I don't need you checking in on me. I won’t take them, I am fine." Nico said avoiding eye contact as the blonde boy towered over him.

"Nico di Angelo, it is my job to make sure you are healthy. I do not care whether you like it or not, you need to take the medication. I don't care if I have to shove it down your throat, I can't have you dying on me di Angelo so take the fucking pills. Please for the love of Apollo or I guess Hades just take it, I don't care how much you say you're okay, you are not. Do you know how many times I have considered putting you in the infirmary on an IV because you looked like you wouldn't last another day? Have you even eaten today Nico? It may seem shocking to you but I actually care about you, I don't want you to drop dead." Will finishes, his usual gentle voice lost replaced with a shaking yet harsh one."Shit, Nico I'm really sorry I just, I'm really concerned about you. Please just take the pills, doctors orders." Will replies in his usual gentleness.

"Okay I'll take them, I swear I'm trying to eat more it's just I forget I need to. Spending years with ghosts and then trapped in that jar I always forget I'm meant to eat." Nico whispered, he was actually trying to eat, but it just makes him feel sick.

"It's at dinner I'll sit with you and Hazel at the Hades table." said Will.

"I thought you weren't allowed to do that?" Nico wondered.

"For medical purposes, I am." Will added simply, Nico didn't argue after that. Seeing Will speaking in that harsh voice, it made him seem more real. He didn't want to admit it but after that he wanted him even more.

***

They walked to the Hades table,

"Oh hey, Will Solace right? I thought you were an Apollo kids, why are you sitting at Hades?" Hazel asked,

"Medical reasons; you're Hazel I presuming?" Will responded, after that they started talking. They got on quite well. With Will there Nico felt more pressured to eat, even then he barley finished half a plate. "It's getting better, just try to eat a bit more each day. I'll see you at campfire, yeah Nico?" Will said before walking away.

"So that's loverboy?" Hazel grinned as Nico tried to hide his blushing,

"Shut up Hazel, there's no chance he likes me." Nico responded softly, looking down. "Especially after today, I'll see you at campfire Haze." He finished before leaving.

***

"Gods Will, just tell him." Annabeth sighed,

"There's no chance he likes me back. I quite literally yelled at him today because he wasn't taking his medication."

"Will, please if Nico di Angelo was going to get scared by yelling he would not have survived Tartarus."

"I know but what if he's straight?" What if he was homophobic.....he was from the 30s...Nico probably didn't know he was bi since he was never at camp constantly. Will didn't say anything to Annabeth but the thought was in the back of his mind. Annabeth thought quickly, she didn't want to out Nico but also he didn't want Will to think he had no chance, he'd been pining over Nico for so long it was kind of hopeless.

"You won't know until you talk to him Will."

"I swear he hates me, he won't even say we're friends."

"Will, Nico does not hate you. If he did he would have made that very clear."

"But-"

"I promise he doesn't hate you Will, trust me."

"Okay Annabeth I trust you, but I still think there is no chance Nico di Angelo, the living embodiment of darkness will ever fall for the son of Appollo." With that Will walked off to the infirmary, just as Percy and Jason came running in.

"Hey Wise Girl." Percy said while kissing her,

"Hi Seaweed brain." Annabeth replied as she messed up his hair,

"I'm sorry to interrupt but I did want to tell you two something." Jason said, "Nico came out to the rest of the group today as well as Reyna. "

"Wait really? Gods I'm so proud of him." Annabeth said, she felt a strange amount of protectiveness over the son of Hades. He'd gone through so much and she was so proud of him for telling everyone.

"I'm guessing I'm still not his type? Wait there's no one I need to drown right? Because I gladly will drown anyone if required,"

"Thankfully no, but I did also offere to strike anyone with lighting if required." Jason responded as he and Percy high fived. Piper walked towards them after leaving a group of Aphrodite kids, she had a look in her eyes which Annabeth could only assume meant she was planning something.

"Guys so you know how Nico likes Will-"

"Wait what?" Annabeth said shocked.

"Nico said you and Percy already knew?" Piper said extremely confused,

"So his type is blondes? " Percy asked,

"Well um..anyways what's the chance that they get together? I need to hear your predictions, Aphrodite kid tradition except they don't know this time so I thought I would ask you guys."

"80%" Percy and Jason said in unison before Annabeth just smiled and said,

"100" and walking off.

"Anyways bye you two, I should probably go and help plan that date for Clarisse and Chris. I told Clarisse we would have it planned by campfire." She said kissing Jason and walking back to where her siblings were.

"Bro I bet I can beat you in a sword fight right now." Jason said,

"Not a chance, your on. No prep time allowed."

"Let's go then."

Percy and Jason both ran off to the forest likely going to do something extremely stupid and probably electrocute a few people but honestly no one cares as their fights were some of the most exciting things to watch.

***

Will was headed back to the infirmary until he saw a very stuck Leo laying under what looked like 3 tonnes of metal, Will could barely lift it but managed to life it up enough for Leo to get out. Thankfully he was extremely scrawny so that didn't require much lifting,

"Leo I just have one question, why were you laying under sheets of metal? Also infirmary, now. I very much doubt that you don't have a single broken bone after having something tripple your weight laying on top of you." Will asked mildly concerned yet laughing.

"Well I was carrying metal sheets to the forest on Festus so I could make a guard around everyone else when Jason and Percy fight because while it is fun to watch people also do not like getting drenched apparently. Who would have thought? But turns out duct tape was not the answer this time and a few of them fell on me." Leo explained as they walked to the infirmary.

"Duct tape has let you down, I hope you can recover from this sense of betrayal Leo."

"I don't know man I just didn't think I would ever be betrayed so deeply." They both burst out into laughter as they reach the infirmary. They walk into a room

"I'm going to take a guess and say your leg isn't broken considering you walked here but still is there any pain?" Will asked him,

"Just a bit in my arms but like that's it mate, I think I'm fine."

Will feels the bones on Leo's arm's checking for any broken bones.

"Well your definition of fine is quite different to mine considering you've broken your left wrist, and your right arm is fractured in two places." Leo cracked a smile, like he didn't feel any pain.

Will hands him some ambrosia,

"Leo, you know how you managed to make an immortal girl to like you? Specifically one that hated you?"

"If you want romantic advice you have come to the wrong person, I'll try to help but like I have no clue how I got Calypso. I think she liked me more when I stopped talking to her and I don't think that normally has the same effect on most people. "

"You're the only person I know who has managed to make someone go from hating you to loving you so I'm gonna take my chances."

"Sure mate I'll try," Leo laughed as he pulled something out of his pocket and started mindlessly fiddling.

"Well, I need to make Nico di Angelo stop hating me."

"You're gay? Was I meant to know this information pre-hand because you are acting like you have told me this before." Leo asked, looking slightly confused.

"I'm bi, it was probably before you came to camp when I came out, but basically the whole camp knows." Will said, for better or worse he thought but didn't tell Leo that.

"Yeah probably, now I'm giving you a heads up before you continue. If Nico hated you, you would be dead by now so you already have that section cleared." Leo said grinning.

"Well how exactly do I change from kind of not hating to hopelessly in love with me?"

"Mate I'm barley passed the I will kill you on the spot stage, but I guess show him you care. Jason said that's what he did and I think it worked out pretty well for him."

“Thanks mate, if you want you can leave the infirmary but no life risking events or anything that requires your hands for 24 hours.”

“I’ll try but no promises mate," Leo said laughing as he walked out."I'll catch you at campfire, yeah?"

"I'll see you there Valdez." Will nodded as Leo walked out the door likely getting himself severely injured, Will knew that he would probably get himself hurt again, Leo was like a magnetic for injuries.

***

The Ghost King finally stands up and splashes his face with some cold water as he started to clean up, no one needed to know. He would be fine, it'll go away soon enough. Every single time he had eaten since being in that jar he had thrown up, his eating had never been very stable but ever since the jar it had gotten a lot worse. When he was on the Argo II he had mostly gotten away with not eating but now with Will Solace watching over him like a hawk he would actually have to eat, Nico hoped he wouldn't realise but he probably would soon enough. Still there was no reason for him to find out any earlier than that, maybe if he got lucky it would fix itself and no one would know but Nico had learnt to not test his luck as it could always get worse. He had left the table as soon as he could and hoped that Hazel wouldn't come back to the cabin too soon.

***

"Good match Jace," Percy sighed, struggling to catch his breath after their fight. They did this a lot to fill in boring parts of the day, or to put on a show. It was also a great way to get your mind off of the last few years when you are nearly killing your friends for fun, the healers had given them many lectures about electrocuting and drowning each other many times but hey they weren't dead yet so they must be doing something right.

"Back at you bro." Jason said putting his shirt back on, "Percy I just realised. We don't have a ship name for Will and Nico, wait Will is bi right? I think I overheard someone talking about it before we went to New Rome."

"Yeah, Annabeth told me that he came out to the whole camp a few days before you, Leo and Pipes came. Now ship names....Wilco?

"Bro that's a terrible ship name, come on we can do better mate."

They both thought for a solid 10 minutes until Jason faceplamed and said,

"Bro, Solangelo, it's so simple yet so perfect."

"Did it really just take us that long to think of that?"

"We've lost our touch bro."

The two boys were laughing as they walked back out of the forest to join the rest of the camp for campfire.

***

Nico had regrettably made the decision to show up at campfire, later making the even worse one to sit with Percy Jackson. He didn't realise how bad of an idea this was until he heard Percy sing, it sounded kind of like a dying bird. Sadly Nico had a lot of experience with dying animals and thought that it almost sounded worse. The hour was going by, then Will started to sing again. Nico didn't know the song, he just watched Will. The light from the hearth made his blonde hair almost glow, his blue eyes were so bright they reminded him of the ocean. His voice was spinning though the cold wind, Nico couldn't control himself, he stared at the Apollo boy until he finished singing. He was there laughing with the rest of his cabin, Nico looked away before Will found out he was looking.

***

"Bye sis, I'll miss you." Nico said pulling Hazel into a hug,

"I'll miss you to, you'll visit New Rome yeah? Frank, Reyna and I'll miss you."

"Course Haze," Nico said kissing his sister on the forehead and pulling her into a hug. A single tear fell from her eyes as she got on the bus, heading back to New Rome.

"Bye di Angelo, it was nice getting to know you. I hope you visit soon, and good luck with the healer." Reyna said pulling him into a hug, Nico had blushed at the last part.

"Send an Iris message when you get there yeah? I'll miss you Reyna." The Ghost king said holding back tears, over their journey he and Reyna had become close. Nico walked over to where Frank was standing, "Good luck on your new role as Preator Frank. Take care of Hazel while you're at New Rome, if I hear one word that you're hurting her in any way I will make you wish you were dead." He said looking up at the boy,

"Don't worry Nico, I'll take care of her. I'll see you next time yeah." He said before getting on the bus, the sky was dark, covered in stars.

***

Nico woke up shaking, his screams muffled in his pillow. Nightmares, Nico stuck in the Jar, Tartrus, Bianca dying, Hazel hurt, the battle of Manhattan, the last time he talked to Bianca. Everything was so realistic, he couldn't control the tears. Nico checked the clock, 12:07 shit he thought to himself as he took the small pill the blonde boy had given him. He could barely swallow it, he hadn't stopped shaking. The nightmares hadn't been as bad with Hazel there but alone they were so vivid and realistic, he couldn't get the images out of his head. He opened up his bedside table and pulled out a pocket knife, another thing on the list that no one could know. He wanted to die, he was cursed, everything good in his life was overrun by fear and sadness. By the end of the night his is arms were covered in shallow cuts, they would heal soon enough and he knew they wouldn't scar, no one has to know. Nico barely slept the rest of the night, the less sleep he got the less time for nightmares.

---

Nico woke up to a loud knock on the door, he had slept in his jeans and camp shirt so he just put on his jacket and ran his fingers through his hair before opening the door. Standing there, with far to much energy for someone to have in the morning: Will Solace.

"What in the Hades are you doing here Solace?" Nico asked rubbing his eyes before spotting the sun towards the east, well it wasn't past 12, truly a miracle. "And what time is it?"

"It's 9:30 and I am here to make sure you take your meds, it's protocol to make sure it's been taken."

Nico rolled his eyes as he grabbed the container that was next to his bed as well as a glass of water that he had left there, as he swallowed he said.

"Happy now Solace?"

"I told you it's protocol, normally we get someone else from the cabin to check but Hazel went to New Rome."

"Aren't you head? Doesn't that mean you made the protocol?" Will put his finger to his lip before responding with,

"Bye Nico, I'll wait for you at the Hades table for breakfast. Oh and watch out for Piper, she is insistent on taking you shopping and Chiron already agreed to letting her take you." He said as he walked out the door. Nico sighed, well there was no chance he was getting out of something if Piper wanted him to do it. He needed a new jacket anyways.

***

Will had annoyingly made sure Nico got food, he picked up a single slice of toast and was forcing himself to eat.

"Neeks don't forget to take the other one as well."

"Don't call me Neeks." He said grumbling as he put the pill in his mouth and swallowed.

"It's a cute nickname."

"Would you like an army of skeletons chasing you? Is that cute enough?"

"No underworldly stuff Neeks, or else-"

"You're kidnapping me and locking me in the infirmary again."

"Exactly." Will smiled resisting the urge to ruffle the Ghost Kings long hair. Then Piper ran up to them,

"Nico I'm taking you shopping today. You can't stop me, I've already asked Chiron and he agrees you need more social interaction." Nico gave her dagger eyes, the Apollo kid had already left to go to the infirmary seemly please with Nico's eating. "Also you need a haircut-"

"Not a chance McLean, I do not trust those people."

"Nico it'll be fine, unless you would rather me cut it."

"No chance."

"One or the other, come on di Angelo. Son of Hades scared of a haircut?"

"Oh fuck you McLean."

"You aren't denying it...."Piper grinned as Nico thought about his options, he knew he wasn't getting away, Piper would probably charmspeak him into getting it cut anyways so there's no point resisting.

"I hate you so much McLean, either way I trust you more." Nico sighed, Piper's face lit up.

"You're the best Nico, trust me I know what I'm doing. Oh you're still not getting out of shopping by the way, you need to own something that isn't black."

"I don't think I do,"

"You act like you're allergic to colour I swear, hey you might even enjoy it."

"Impossible."

"We can go to McDonalds? I remember Percy saying something about you loving that place."

Nico considered the offer, it had been two year's since he had gone to McDonalds. He was almost certain Piper had charmspoke him considering after that offer he agreed.

"Great, I'll meet you at thirteen in an hour." Piper said before walking off to celebrate her success with Jason. Then he reaslied what he agreed to, Piper would probably find out about his eating thing. Fuck. At that point though there was no going back, 'well let's hope that Piper McLean can keep a secret.' he thought before walking to the Hades cabin and throwing up everything he had eaten. He still thought it was a miracle no one had found out, he always made sure to be in his cabin before it happened. People worry about him enough already, he didn't need them worrying even more, he would be fine, it would fix itself.

***

Nico heard a knock and went to open the door, Piper looked back at him with a smile.

"Hey McLean, please do not make me regret this."

"Trust me you won't Nico, and you do realise that people have first names right?" Piper smiled as she walked inside; Nico rolled his eyes at the comment and closed the door. As they walked inside the bathroom the Aphrodite girl pulled out some scissors, a comb and a spray bottle filled with water. "Okay so since your hair is straight so it'll be easier to cut while it's wet, I'll cut it to around your shoulders and add some layers, any objections?"

"You forced me into this, I'm hoping you know what you're doing."

"You have so much confidence in me, why are you so against getting your hair cut anyway? I'm genuinely curious."

"Reason."

"Great explanation." Piper muttered as she started brushing Nico's hair, it was soft and wasn't that thick but not thin either.

"Last time I got it cut was like two years ago, I asked for it to but cut around my shoulders and this bitch cut it shorter than Jason's saying it 'Wasn't right' so now I refuse to have it shorter than my collar to spite her."

"I'm surprised you didn't kill her, I probably would have." Piper laughed as she continued brushing,

"Well social anxiety is a real bitch." Nico smiled as he said it. The daughter of Aphrodite started to spray his hair with water and cutting carefully half an inch above his shoulder and adding layers into it. Nico stood perfectly still the whole time, neither talked until Piper had finished.

"So di Angelo, thoughts?" Piper asked,

"You're surprising good at this McLean." Nico smiled, a often a rare occurrence for the child of. Hades yet it had become more common in the last few days.

"Don't be so shocked Nico, my mother is Aphrodite, Goddess of beauty." Piper said as she handed him some hair ties, "You'll need these, I have no clue how you've survived so long with your hair out but you don't have to suffer any longer. Also Will would love it." Piper winked, Nico rolled his eyes.

"Oh leave me be McLean, but thanks for the hair ties." he said as he put them around his wrist. The two cleaned up, Piper started collecting her things and glaced at her watch.

"I'll go get ready, meet you back here in twenty minutes." She said running out of the door, giving Nico just enough time to overthink. Piper had actually done a good job at cutting it, he ran his fingers through it, pulling some part from the sides in front of his face. It was shorter than he was used to but it probably looked more decent, the longer hair had started getting on his nerve either way and he mentally noted to thank Piper for cutting it. He wondered what the Apollo boy would think; he took one of the hair ties off his wrist and tied his hair back, trying to stop thinking about it, before getting ready to be dragged out by Piper. He wore the first pair of black jeans he saw with a black T-shirt and his aviator jacket, he suspected the colour may be making less of an appearance in his closest after Piper was done.

***

The two stepped into a mall in New York that Nico could not bother to remember the name of, Piper grabbed his hand dragging him through the mall. Nico constantly reminded himself that human contact would not kill him and that it was probably a good thing Piper was dragging him along considering he had no idea where he was going.

"I still don't understand why I couldn't just shadow travel us here."

"Will threatend to kill me and Chiron if we let you shadow travel."

"Of course it was Solace, I would expect nothing less from him." The son of Hades said, rolling his eyes. The two demigods walked through the stores both trying on different clothes and Piper this time failing to convince Nico to get anything that wasn't black. All while Piper teased him about a certain son of Apollo,

"Be realistic Piper, he's probably straight anyways."

"No he's not actually, he's bi. Leo was going to tell you but he couldn't find you, apparently the rest of Camp knows." Nico's face lit up for a second before looking back down.

"There's still no chance. He is literally the embodiment of sunshine, I am the child of Hades, God of the fucking Underworld. There is no sunlight there."

"Nico he clearly cares about you."

"It's his job."

"But he checks in on you so much more than anyone else."

"Because he doesn't trust me to stay alive."

"If he didn't trust you to be alive he would have kept you in the infirmary."

"There's still no chance he likes me."

"You're the only one who thinks that Nico, he gave you a nickname for Aphrodite's sake. He doesn't do that with anyone else who is 'just a patient'"

"He did that to get on my nerve."

"Gods you're so dense, wanna go to McDonald's now?"

"Oh, sure." Nico said trying to hide the shake in his voice.

"Oh and di Angelo, Will threatened to kill me if I didn't make you eat a full meal so yeah."

"Of course he did."

***

They finished ordering, Piper had only gotten some fries and a drink because apparently the vegetarian options 'were so bad they tasted like grass'. Nico just nodded, not pointing out the fact that not ten minutes ago she was threatening him to eat a full meal today because Will would kill her if he didn't and here she was barely eating herself.

"Number 57!" Nico walked up and grabbed the tray, he breathed in deeply. He'll be okay, if he acted calm then he could play it off. He would just walk off for a bit, Piper didn't have to know. The two started to eat, it still tasted as good as Nico remember but he could barely get anything down his throat. He already felt sick but he knew he could withstand at least another five minutes without throwing up, he tried to keep conversation to a minimum putting all his energy into seeming fine. After another few minutes passed, then Nico muttered,

"Bathroom." Before walking away, he tried to keep his pace normal but already knew he was walking away too fast and Piper would know something was up. He quickly walked inside and was extremely thankful the bathroom was empty, he went into the stall furthest away from the door. He threw up everything he had eaten like countless other times, at that point he was just hoping no one would walk in. He cleaned himself up a bit and headed back towards Piper,

"Okay tell me. What happened?"

"What?"

"I know something happened, you're biting your nails and you looked sick before. Also you practically ran and you look nervous."

"Nothing happened."

"Nico don't lie, I know something happened. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." Piper desperately wanted to know what had happened to the Hades boy but she knew when to stop pushing, she didn't want to charmspeak it out of him, that's purely invasive. He'll tell when he's ready.

"Come on, I want to do something I'll regret in a week."

"Which is...?"

"I'm getting my ears pierced."

"Oh my Gods, yes. That is an amazing idea; if they say you look too young to do it without parents concent, I'll charmspeak them."

"Thanks McLean, didn't particularly like the plan of asking the God of the Underworld to come to a mall in New York." Nico was relieved Piper had either forgotten to continue interrogating him or was leaving the topic for now, he had been meaning to do this at some point either way and this seemed like a good occasion.

***

Piper had to do some charmspeaking, but finally Nico had gotten them done. He decided to get doubles since he was going to regret it anyway might as well go all out, he hadn't even flinched when it happened. After that they went to a few more stores and Piper finally convinced him to get something that wasn't black, instead a very dark blue.

"I would ask if you are actually allergic to bright colours except I've seen you in a bright red shirt so that clearly isn't the case."

"I just like black, is there a problem?"

"It makes you look like the Grim Reaper."

"I was hoping for that."

"You're hopeless di Angelo."

"Finally you're giving up, took you long enough."

"Nope, simply stating facts. If I can bring a metal dragon to life I can make you look less like a ghost without the use of charmspeaking." Turns out however that she could not, maybe some tasks really were impossible.

"I'll shadow travel us back, it's not that far."

"Nico, I would get killed by your loverboy if you did that. We'll just take the-"

"That is probably more dangerous if we're being perfectly honest, also shut up."

"Never. By the way not that many people died, it was-" but the daughter of Aphrodite didn't have time to finish. A wooden club hit her over the head, Nico cursed under his breath and pulled out the only weapon he had, a small pocket knife, he knew he couldn't do much against a fully grown cyclopes. He didn't know where it had come from but that wasn't important, the monster had probably found them because of his blood, children of the big three were the easiest to be tracked by monsters. He had skeletons but there is no way he could stab it with the celestial bronze blade, Piper had passed out and was bleeding on the floor. Meanwhile Nico was struggling to not get hit by the 15 foot cyclopes, he didn't know what everyone else had seen but they didn't pay much attention. He raised a few skeletons to try and keep it in place, he felt himself getting weaker. He knew he shouldn't be doing these things but he was fine for those years he was alone, he would survive now. Piper had lost a lot of blood, he didn't know how well this would go, he had some squares of ambrosia but couldn't get it to her without dying. There was nothing else he could do, he grabbed her wrist and shadow traveled back to camp, but still got hit with the club before he was gone. His head hurt and he tasted blood in his mouth, he collapsed as he showed up somewhere in front of cabin 13.

---

"Nico, God's you scared us."

"What? Am I in the infirimry? Is Piper okay?" He said barely able to speak, coughing after each word.

"Piper woke up in an hour, you've been out for three days Death boy."

"Don't call me that, wait WHAT? I've been out for three days?"

"Try to breathe, I'll get you some water and then I'll explain." The blonde boy walked of and Nico tried to comprehend what had just happened, he'd passed out for three days. Shit, what had happened with the cyclops. Solace had returned with a glass of water and handed it to Nico after he had sat up, "Jason's been worried sick about you, I finally forced him outside today to get some food. You had a concussion and you were practically dead, I forced as much necter down your throat as I could without killing you."

"I didn't kill the cyclops, what happened after?" Nico coughed as he spoke, Will ruffled his hair.

"Neeks it was handled, but right now that isn't important. Three days rest in the infirmary, no underworldy things for 11 weeks 6 for this time, 5 for last time. I'll go and get you some food it'll probably help. Also I'll get Jason, he's hasn't slept for the past three days and would kill me if I didn't tell him instantly." Nico wanted to protest but he physically couldn't, he just nodded as the golden boy walked off. He wondered how longs Jason had been waiting and instantly felt guilty, he also desperately wanted to see Piper to make sure she was okay but right now he could barely breath. Jason ran into the room wrapping his arms around Nico,

"I was so fucking scared di Angelo, I thought you were dead."

"S-sorry.." Nico muttered,

"What are you apologising for?"

"Will told me you haven't slept for three days."

"Well yeah, I was worried about you, not exactly your fault you got attacked. Nico you don't know how bad it looked, you we're laying on the floor covered in blood with Piper on top of you. When we first took you to the infirmary sometimes you would go through solid objects like you were turning into a shadow, you had a broken arm and were barely breathing. Fucking hell Nico I'm so happy you're alive."

"Is Piper okay?"

"Yeah she's fine, just gave her a bit of ambrosia and she woke up. She's been beating herself up over not noticing the cylopese before though."

"That's what she's worried-" Nico started coughing violently before he managed to drink some water, before wincing at the pain in his ribs.

"Nico! Are you okay?" A mixture of fear and panic washed over Jason's face,

"Fine. Go back to dinner, you look like you haven't eaten in far to long."

"Irony," Jason smirked before walking out the door.

***

The Apollo boy walked in carrying two plates of food, placing one on an empty table and handing the other one to Nico.

"Neeks you okay?"

"Hurts...to...breathe." The blonde boy quickly walked up to Nico lifting his shirt and touching his torso feeling his ribs, the son of Hades flinched at the contact.

"Sorry," Will said, yet still keeping his hands on the small boy.

"Still getting used to human contact." Nico mumbled, the Apollo boys hand was warm on his skin.

"Shit, Neeks. It's broken, I should have checked but I completely forgot with the whole passing through solid objects and hoping you would wake up. I'm really sorry." He pushed on the bones a bit, it hurt but Nico showed no reaction. Then he started softly singing a hymn, Nico felt warmth rushing over his body. He exhaled softly as the blonde boy that he just realised had been faintly glowing faded, he lifted his hands off leaving Nico's skin warm. "That should have fixed it," Will said as his bright blue eyes locked with Nico's. "You okay Neeks?"

"Yeah, fine." Nico muttered realising he had just frozen, he quickly grabbed his shirt and pulling it down before starting to process the fact that Will Solace can heal when he sings and glows.

"You seem surprised," Will noted, he was as well, his healing had been less reliable after the Gods disappeared for months.

"YOU HEAL PEOPLE SINGING? FUCKING SINGING OF ALL THINGS?!?" Nico said in pure shock,

"Apollo's the God of music, healing and the Sun..?"

"But just imagine if you get stabbed and someone just starts singing."

"It makes more sense on paper okay!" Will says raising his hands in surrender, "Nico you should probably eat something, you've been on an IV for three days." Nico glanced over realising the needle was in his arm.

"I'm not hungry." Nico muttered under his breath, just loud enough for Wil to hear.

"Neeks you haven't eaten in three days, just try to eat something. It'll make you feel better, you'll need it." Nico knew that he wouldn't be able to keep anything down, but maybe if he acted right he could play it off as a one time thing, he just felt bad this time thing. Will started eating an apple,

"What happened to an apple a day keeps the doctor away?" Nico smirked, before forcing himself to take a bite of a sandwich and instantly regretted it. Will just smiled and rolled his eyes at the comment; Nico kept forcing himself to eat, no matter how sick he felt. He was hoping that Will would leave soon but doubted he would be that lucky, the Apollo kid seemed insistent on keeping him company. Will looked over to the small boy realising how sick he looked,

"Neeks you alright?" Nico just shook his head, Will quickly handed him the closest bin and held back Nico's hair as he threw up the sandwhich he had just forced himself to eat.

"Cazzo." He muttered under his breath, normally he could force himself to last a bit longer but after the last three days he couldn't handle it. Will gave him a glass of water before sitting down on the bed next to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. After a few minutes he ran his fingers through Nico's hair, taking out every tangel.

"Di Angelo, you should probably get some rest, it should help you feel better. Tomorrow morning see if you can eat anything, we'll keep you on the IV for now." Nico just nodded already half asleep leaning against the blonde boy. Will lifted up the sleeping boy with ease, laying him on the bed. He was too light, he weighed 90 pounds at the very most which was dangerously underweight. Will made a mental note to talk to him more about that; he looked at the small boy laying there. He seemed so peaceful, he had gone through so much, this was the first time Will had seen him relaxed, even in his sleep. Last time he'd been in the infirmary he had slept for most of it but he always seemed ready to attack or run, Will couldn't help but smile at him. He flicked off the lights and checked his watch, 8:42, that meant he would have some time to talk to Annabeth before campfire.

***

"How's he doing?"

"He woke up today, turns out he had a broken rib and I didn't fucking realise."

"Will, he almost died. You were panicking, you helped him in the end, don't beat yourself up."

"It's a fucking broken rib not a paper cut."

"I know and normally I would be scolding you over it but this is a different situation, anyway any progress?"

"Well I mean he didn't threaten to kill me when I touched him and he talked to me so that's something I think...?"

"See he doesn't hate you!" She says punching him in the shoulder lightly,

"He's so fucking hot, how the Hades is someone allowed to be that hot?"

"Damn Solace, you're more obsessed than I thought."

"No shit. Also how do I get past the 'I won't kill you but I don't like you very much' stage?

"Try to talk to him, make him play 20 questions with you? Then he can interrogate you while you interrogate him, but also have few skips. He's gone through a lot, you don't want to force him to answer if he doesn't feel comfortable."

"Thanks for the advice Anni-Annabeth." He catches himself before using the nickname, he knows it's the one Luke always used.

"No problem Will, I wish you the best of luck in not getting killed."

"Hopefully I won't need it." he sighed with a smile before walking off to join his siblings. Annabeth smiled to herself, this would be entertaining. It was honestly painful to watch them pining over each other like this much while being so clueless about the other, it took all of her willpower to not lock them in a room together until they kissed.

---

"Morning Death boy." Will smiled as Nico got up,

"So creative, how long did it take for you to think of that?"

"Would you prefer Neeks? Or Doom and Gloom?"

"You are a child, Sunshine."

"Wow Nico di Angelo has discovered nicknames; anyways how do you feel?" It still surprised Nico how quickly Will could go from joking around to very much serious,

"I'm fine."

"Do you think you can eat anything?" Nico shook his head, as Will checked his pulse and breathing before taking out the IV needle. "Neeks I'm gonna take a blood sample, we need to see if the underworldly things have any other effects." Nico nodded but Will noticed the uncomfort on his face, he decided not to point it out but made a mental note. Nico didn't flinch at the needle but he looked like he was re-living something, Will didn't ask but wished he knew. "You feel alright to get up?"

"Yeah,"

"Great we're going outside, you need sunlight."Nico muttered something under his breath not loud enough for Will to hear.

"Aren't I on infirmary arrest?"

"Technically no, but it's either stay in the infirmary or have a healer with you at all times right now."

"Amazing," Nico grumbled following Will outside towards the edge of the forest.

***

"So Solace what exactly are we doing?"

"Down to play twenty questions?" Nico considered the offer and smirked,

"Sure." The two sat down next to each other on a log.

"Two skips each, but they get replaced with other questions."

"What's something that isn't a secret but most people don't know about you?" He was ridiculously bored and thought he could use this game to his advantage.

"I'm not actually blonde."

"Explain. Now."

"I was brunette but when I got claimed any part of my hair that was in the sun turned blonde." He pulled out a piece of his hair that wasn't normally visible, it was a light chesnut brown colour.

"Well that's shocking, you know when I asked that question that was not an answer I was expecting."

"I'm a mysterious person di Angelo, now, do you have any exes?"

"Solace I spend most of my time avoiding people."

"In hindsight that was a pretty dumb question."

"Too late, if you had to kill all the people in one cabin which one would it be?"

"Demeter. That was a bit of a violent question." He tried to play it off but his answer had been so quick and confident Nico started to wonder what had happened. "Have you ever drunk?"

"More than you would expect."

"Neeks! You're fourteen, have you ever wondered why there are age restrictions?" Nico just smirked,

"You asked Sun boy, anyways technically I'm older than that. What's the worst crime you have ever committed?"

"Love how you just assume I've committed crimes, but assult. The only reason it wasn't murder is Annabeth pulling me off."

"The fuck Solace, are you going to explain that?"

"I'd rather not, let's just say I was pretty...pissed that day."

"Well that's terrifying."

"I told you I have secrets di Angelo, who's someone you used to care about but now hate?"

"Skip."

"Is it true you liked Annabeth?"

"Really Solace? No it is not, otherwise Percy would have already murdered me."

"Had to ask, the Aphrodite cabin was trying to figure that out for two years."

"Truly incredible, can you fight with a sword?"

"Not in the slightest."

"I'm teaching you, archery will be useless in close combat. You will die in a matter of seconds ."

"You have so much confidence in me Neeks, but thanks for the offer."

"Wasn't an offer, more so a kidnapping where I teach you by force how to fight."

"Okay then...do you prefer the 1930s or now?"

"Now, better arcades."

"Great reasoning."

"What's your worst fear?"

"Pass, I would never hear the end of it."

"Can't be that bad."

"You would never shut up about it Neeks, I can guess that much." Nico locked eyes with the blonde boy, he considered the question he was about to ask.

"Do you regret coming out to all of camp?" So he did know, Will thought to himself. He didn't answer instantly but he didn't want to pass it either.

"Well, um.."

"You have skips, you don't have to answer Will." That was the first time Nico had used his actual name, Will desperately wanted to kiss him.

"I want to answer it just, thinking. I'm happy they know and I don't have to hide it but...some people aren't the nicest. Cabin four has the most for whatever reason, they seem to get joy out of making me feel like shit. Most people are nice enough, with the rest, well you get used to it." Nico grabbed his hand,

"Who. Has. Been. Giving. You. Shit? Give me a list, I will make sure they'll never do anything again."

"Neeks it's fine, I don't need you threatening them."

"I'll be doing a lot more than threats Solace, give me a list of every single person who has hurt you."

"Nico it's okay."

"Did I ask? You're a ball of sunshine, no one and I mean no one has any reason to hurt you."

"They do, there's so many people I couldn't save, I killed them. I deserve to suffer because of that, they deserve revenge on me for killing their friends." Will had tears forming in his eyes.

"Will it's not your fault they died, and either way you shouldn't have to go through this."

"Nico, are you straight?" He froze for a second, he had still been holding Will's hand but he didn't want to let go. He was warm, his thumb was stroking his hand warming up the usually freezing Ghost king. After Will had told him so much he couldn't lie, he always had a skip but part of him wanted Will to know.

"..n..no...I'm gay. Not that many people know, the seven and Reyna that's it. Please don't tell anyone." Nico shakes a bit and a few tears fell, he didn’t want to cry in front of him but he couldn’t help it. Will wrapped his free arm around Nico and pulled him closer to himself,

"Thank you for telling me, I know it's hard Neeks."

"How did you tell so many people?"

"Didn't like people assuming things, also I just...didn't want to hide I guess. Still though, I've been too scared to tell my mum, barely seen her since I'm here all year but even if I had the chance to I probably wouldn't tell her. As for the actual time well it was a while after Percy was missing, before Jason, Piper and Leo showed up, campfire, just kinda said if at the end."

"Did anyone know before that?"

"I told Annabeth first but Kayla and Austin found out by themselves pretty quickly. Who was your first crush?"

"Do not hold this against me, it was Percy." Will started grinning,

"Same, half the camp has liked him at this point I swear."

"Half of camp is pathetic."

"You're including yourself in that statement you know."

"I am fully aware, honestly I should have given up on him when I saw him talking to Annabeth the first time."

"Didn't they hate each other for a few years?"

"Hate is a strong word, I prefer to use hopelessly in love and oblivious."

"Lovely wording; I gave up when my brain started working and I realised he is straight."

"You think Percy is straight? Have you talked to him before?"

"Percy isn't straight?!"

"With the way he talked about Luke? Not a chance, and that was after he betrayed him. I can only imagine him pining over him at the age of twelve, completely oblivious, then also being hopelessly in love with Annabeth and being a helpless simp once more."

"So you are telling me Percy Jackson liked Luke Castellan, aka. the person who tried to kill him multiple times?"

"When he was twelve definitely, at least in the way he talked about what he was like before when I met him. Don't know if he realised it then, but he is not straight. You haven't seen him and Jason talk, if I didn't know how much he loved Annabeth, going to Taturus with her I would have been sure they're secretly dating."

"The more you know I guess. What's something you can do that no one knows about?"

"I can braid hair, I mean Hazel knows that but still."

"Emo Death boy can braid hair."

"Firstly, I'm not emo."

"Keep thinking that Neeks."

"Secondly, this is why I don't tell people this."

"Honestly the fact you can braid hair is adorable, also it proves that you are no where near as scary as you think."

"I could kill you right now."

"You sure about that di Angelo? Right now you can't do much without melting into a puddle of darkness, you're just a nerd that's pretending to be dark and mysterious."

"Oh shut up Solace."

"Never."

"Have you been on a quest?"

"Nope, I just try to prevent deaths after them."

"How many languages can you speak?"

"Wait give me a second, Itallian, Greek moderen and ancient, Latin, English, French, Spanish, Swedish, Portuguese, Polish, Finnish, German and Dutch. So that's twelve and a half I'm fluet in and I'm trying to teach myself Russian and Japanese." He said counting them off on his fingers

"Gods Nico, what exactly do you do with your free time?"

"Well first four are pretty obvious but Bianca taught me French and Swedish and the rest I've taught myself, writing's hell with dyslexia but I've survived. It's a pretty useful skill when you randomly show up in different countries."

"I can barely speak English properly half the time!"

"That sounds like a problem on your side Sunshine." He said messing up the blonde boys hair, Will desperately tried to hide his blushing. "Have you ever passed out because you healed too many people?"

"Yeah, happens quite a bit." Nico slapped him, not that hard but hard enough for it to hurt. "Hey what was that for?"

"You can't be overworking yourself like that Solace, you're a doctor for Zeus's sake. What help is it going to be if you pass out while healing someone?"

"It's the most effective way, plus I get more people healed."

"So let me get this straight, you risk your own health while telling people not to?"

"Okay when you put it that way-"

"Yeah it sounds bad! Please do not do that, can't have you dying on me Solace"

"I thought you were plotting to kill me anyways?"

"Exactly, can't have you dying before I kill you myself."

"Sure di Angelo, have you ever killed anyone?"

"Pass." He had become friendly with Will, he didn't need anyone else leaving him.

"Cats or dogs?"

"Do hellhounds count? I have a pet hellhound called Mrs O'Leary."

"Was that a gift from Hades?"

"Nope, from Percy."

"Wait what? I'm just going to accept that at this point."

"Good idea, I wasn't planning to explain."

"Course you weren't," Will checked his watch. "Come on Neeks, it's time for lunch, we got through ten questions each, same time tomorrow?"

"I don't have a choice do I?"

"Nope; head to the infirmary I'll get you some food."

"I'm not hungry."

"You haven't eaten for a few days, just try to eat a few bites."

"Fine.." Nico muttered before walking off to the infirmary.

***

----------

I really hope this helps peeps :)

[theflyingfeeling]

Twelfth Day of Gift-Giving: Gift Ideas

Prompt(s): jewelry + polaroid camera

We can have a little Christmassy angst & pining. As a treat 🖤 (another standalone, the main story will be continued...later this week 😌)

~

“Janne told me he’s buying Joel a dildo."

Olli snorted the mouthful of coffee he had just sipped back into his paper cup.

“What?!”

“For that stupid Secret Santa thing," Tommi explained. "He got Joel. Said he’s gonna write him a card saying ‘Merry Christmas, go fuck yourself’.”

With his mouth now empty – and provided with proper context for the anecdote – Olli was now able to laugh at it. 

“Just what he needs, really.”

“D’you mind if we pop down to some stores on our way? I still need to buy mine for Porko.”

“Yeah, sure. Haven’t bought mine either.” Olli didn’t have much else scheduled for his Tuesday than a coffeeshop slash passport picture date with Tommi, so he might as well try to get the whole Secret Santa gift exchange fuss over and done with in time before the band Christmas party on Saturday.

“Who did you get?” Tommi asked and bit into his Christmas star pastry.

“I ain’t telling you. It’s Secret Santa, if I may remind you.”

“So Aleksi?”

Olli brought his cup back to his mouth, hoping it might at least partially hide the sudden blush creeping on his cheeks. 

“When are you gonna tell him?”

“Tell him what,” Olli said laconically. Somehow, playing dumb was much easier than facing the truth. That was why it annoyed Olli to no end how he never stood a chance when Tommi as much as raised his eyebrow at him.

“Why should I tell him?”

“Don’t you think he deserves to know?”

The question made Olli sigh heavily, out of sheer frustration. 

What right does Aleksi have to know, huh? How does he deserve to know that I can’t stop fucking thinking about him any more than I deserve this bullshit misery I’ve dug myself into? Or perhaps I do deserve it, in fact, just as a punishment for having fallen for him in the first place. Aleksi, on the other hand? All he's done has been just being his amazing, funny, sexy self to deserve nothing but blissful ignorance.

“Dunno.”

The creases on Tommi’s forehead softened.

“You’ll make your own decisions of course, but just… consider it. It might help you… you know…”

To get over him? To move on and forget about him, because it’s not like he’s ever gonna feel the same about me, and even if he did, by some goddamn miracle, it wouldn’t change a thing because he’s engaged to be married next spring? If anything, it would only make matters worse, thank you very much. 

“Sure, I’ll think about it.” Olli chucked down the rest of his coffee, still so hot it almost burned his throat. “Well, let’s go then?” Without waiting for an answer, he stood up and grabbed his coat from the back of the chair he was sat on and headed towards the shopping mall escalator, not stopping to see if Tommi was keeping up with him. He did hear the long sigh with a beaten undertone to it but hoped that would be the end of that conversation. 

~*~

Still empty-handed after visiting a number of stores at the mall, Tommi pulled on Olli’s sleeve as they passed a jeweller’s.

“I wonder if they have something under twenty euros there?”

“Worth a shot,” Olli shrugged, although he had already more or less given up on finding anything he’d want to give Aleksi for Christmas that wouldn’t scream either ‘I’m crushing on you so fucking bad that I will go insane if you look at me like the way you did that night in Berlin one more time’ or ‘hey, bro, have this stupid boob-shaped flower pot as a token of my brotherly affection, because I’m totally cool with the fact you’re getting married to someone that’s not me and that I’ll never get to have you the way I want you… bro’.

As soon as they entered a shop, Tommi’s face lit up when he spotted a display of cheap children’s earrings.

“Hell yeah, now we’re talking. Oh, look, Little My ones!” Tommi picked up a box with a pair of stud earrings inside, a poorly-painted Moomin character as decoration.

“They sure would fit Porko’s new stage fit,” Olli smiled wryly.

“Yep, that’s my gift for Porko settled,” Tommi agreed, checking the bottom of the box for the price. “Have you found anything for Aleksi yet?”

Olli then pretended to look around the selection of jewellery and shrugged.

“How’s about one of those fake septum rings? Since he seems to like the one he already has.” Tommi nodded towards a shelf displaying a collection of fake piercings in various colours and styles. 

Olli swallowed. He did not need a reminder of Aleksi’s new-found love for piercings, not after that one night Olli had, lying in his bed at night going out of his mind missing Aleksi’s stupid face, been browsing Aleksi’s social media accounts until a picture of the man Olli had never seen before, with his neck and eyelids painted black and a ring decorating his septum, appeared on his phone screen. Promptly Olli had ignored the other piece of jewellery Aleksi had been wearing on his left ring finger and had begun grinding against the mattress with his eyes nailed to Aleksi’s face until he had come inside his boxers, his moans and gasps muffled by a pillow.

He hadn’t felt proud of himself afterwards, even though it was hardly the first time he had masturbated to the thought of Aleksi.

“That one looks cool,” Tommi pointed at a septum ring with decorations imitating brass knuckles. “I think Aleksi might like it,” Tommi pointed out helpfully before heading towards the check-out counter, a self-satisfied smile on his face as he admired the perfect gift he had found for Porko.

Aleksi would like it for sure, but what about Olli’s own sanity?

Fuck it, he thought nevertheless and grabbed the damned ring before walking after Tommi.

~*~

So far, Olli had succeeded in keeping a sensible distance to Aleksi without seeming like he was avoiding him, while also holding on to the last bits of his mental health. At least Aleksi wasn’t wearing that ridiculous(ly hot) fake piercing, even if Olli did have to restrain himself from staring at Aleksi's unruly hair and the front of his tight black t-shirt for too long, or else he might have actually begun to weep by Aleksi’s feet. 

Joonas loved the Little My earrings Tommi had bought him, and Janne did, indeed, gift Joel a large, pink dildo just as he had threatened, which resulted in a round of immature laughter as the silicone sex toy was passed around. When it came to Aleksi’s turn to open his present, Olli made sure to look everywhere else except at him.

“Oh, wow, this is cool.” Aleksi brought the little box almost to his nose for a closer inspection. “Really cool, actually.”

In his moment of weakness, Olli dared a glance at Aleksi, only to find he was looking straight back at him in return.

“Thanks,” Aleksi said. Olli wasn’t sure he even wanted to know what had blown his cover.

Not exactly in his best Christmas spirits, and even less in the mood of being everyone’s centre of attention, Olli dawdled unwrapping his present until everyone else was already gawking at the silly knick-knacks and tacky accessories they had been gifted by fellow bandmates or members of the crew. Luckily his was hidden inside a simple paper bag, so he could easily sneak a look in without making a show of tearing it open from wrapping paper. 

When he saw what was inside, he swore his heart stopped for a second or two.

He was looking at a polaroid camera, but instead of a brand-new, never-before-used one, he had been given his own polaroid camera, the one he had lost during their European tour in the fall. It had been broken that night, dropped on the floor one too many times, and on top of that someone had stolen it right from their table towards the end of their afterparty in a crowded local bar. He had pretended not to be bothered by the loss, even though snapping random, aesthetic shots at their tour locations had been his favourite pastime during those weeks; at least it had given him something else to do and think about than drowning himself in his heartache.

Aleksi was the only one who would’ve known how upset he actually had been about the stolen camera, for Olli had (literally) cried about it to him afterwards in their hotel room, too tipsy on cheap German beer to care how Aleksi might have perceived him. It was Olli’s best and worst memory from that tour; falling asleep with his face buried in the crook of Aleksi’s neck, waking up with a throbbing headache and his yearning for the man stronger than ever.

Although Olli had immediately recognized the camera from the slight dent on its side, he still reached for it to pick it up in his hands, just to make sure it really was the same one he had lost – or thought he had, it now seemed. With a trembling finger he turned the camera on and couldn’t help the soft gasp that left his mouth when he saw the device coming to life, which had not happened the last time Olli had held it in his hands. Then he proceeded to take a picture of the pile of torn wrapping paper on the table in front of him and watched as a still blacked-out picture slid out of the machine. 

Suddenly the private room they had rented for the night at a downtown Oulu restaurant felt too small and suffocating around him, so he set the picture and the camera on the table and stormed outside.

The frigid coldness of the outdoors punched the air out of Olli’s lungs, forcing him lean against the brick wall by the back door of the restaurant to catch his breath. At least it was winter and the terrace was empty; he didn’t exactly need witnesses for his little meltdown.

He wasn’t granted the privilege of privacy for too long, however, because a moment later, the back door opened, letting out the cheerful chitter-chatter of the restaurant for a couple of seconds before muffling it again. 

“Everything okay?” Aleksi asked him. Olli could only bring himself to nod. 

“I, ummm… I had your camera fixed.”

“I noticed."

“Sorry I had to steal it first though. I didn’t meant to, in fact I was just trying to make sure you wouldn’t lose it, but then I just… then you… fuck, nevermind.”

A small cloud erupted in the cold winter air as Aleksi sighed heavily.

“It’s fucking cold in here,” he said when the cloud had disappeared and stroke his bare arms. “Let’s go back inside?”

“Yeah, you go, I’m just gonna… I need another breath of fresh air, if you don’t mind.”

“Okay,” Aleksi said quietly, but showed no other signs of leaving his side. 

Olli wondered if the silence between them was as deafening to Aleksi as it was to him.

“Thanks for the piercing, by the way. It’s fucking cool.”

“How did you know it was from me?” Olli couldn’t help himself any longer and blurted out the question or else he’d go mute for good.

Aleksi chuckled. “Christmas magic, I guess.”

Olli almost felt like telling Aleksi to shove his ‘Christmas magic’ to you-know-where for giving him such an annoyingly vague answer instead of a serious one, and he supposed Aleksi understood his passive-aggressive silence as the man continued a moment later:

“I, uhhh…” he paused to chuckle, “I may have gone through everyone to figure out who was your Secret Santa and then switched with them. And now I sort of regret it, I mean… I should’ve just given the camera to you weeks ago. I’m sure Niko would’ve gifted you something that wasn’t as… creepy.”

“It’s not creepy,” Olli shook his head. “It’s very thoughtful, actually. Thank you. I… god, I hadn’t even thanked you yet,” he groaned, hiding his face in his hands for lack of anything better to do with himself. Aleksi had just given him the sweetest, most unbelievable Christmas gift Olli could have dared to wish from the ridiculous Secret Santa humbug Joonas made them do every single year, and he couldn’t even bring himself to be thankful from all his pining and grief? Such a friend he was.

(Aleksi did deserve better.)

“So you’re not mad at me for taking your camera and not telling you?”

Olli shook his head again.

“No.”

How could I ever?

“Good,” Aleksi nodded. His teeth had begun clattering. “Fuck, it’s freezing tonight. I could never live this up north.” 

Please don’t remind me.

“You should go back inside. I’ll be right behind you.”

“No, I can wait. Keep you company.” Aleksi shoved his hands in his jean pockets, casually as if he wasn’t literally shivering from the cold. “I mean. Unless you want me to go.”

If Olli had been even half as strong as he would’ve liked to be, he would’ve ordered Aleksi to leave him alone so he could dwell in his misery in peace. Tragically, the part of him that craved to be near Aleksi always trumped any other feeling.

“Just stay. If you want to. Although I’m afraid I’m not the best company right now.”

He could feel Aleksi look at him, patiently waiting for him to elaborate.

“Is there anything I can do to help that?”

Is there? Let’s see. You could throw that ring of yours in the Bay of Bothnia and call off the wedding for starters, or if you can't do that, then at least cross my name off the guest list, because I’m not sure I’ll be able to witness your happiness next May, as selfish as it sounds. Or then I guess you could pull me in your arms like you did when I cried to about how grief-stricken I was about having my camera stolen and maybe even let me fall asleep on your chest one last time, for old times’ sake, before I’ll pack my bags and move to the North Pole perhaps, or some place else that’s too cold for these thoughts of you to follow me.

“Not much, I’m afraid.”

Next to him in the dark, Aleksi nodded. Yet, he made no effort to leave his side, although by then he must have been struggling to appear unbothered by the cold in just a thin t-shirt and jeans.

After a while, when Olli himself was starting to feel the effect of the minus degrees, Aleksi shuffled closer to him; not quite touching him, but close enough to easily rest his chin on Olli’s shoulder if he wished to; close enough for Olli to hear his shivering breaths in his ear.

“Olli, I… I should tell you. While I still can.”

It was laughable how just one sentence was all it took to bring Olli’s hopes back up from the gutter. Not awfully high, but on the surface, as if to make sure they'd still be alive to maximise the pain on the way back down to the depths of his agony. 

Because there were times Olli had asked himself if the lingering looks or touches they shared meant as much to Aleksi as they meant to him. He had spent many a sleepless night wondering if there really had been something other than friendly fooleries going on in between them when Aleksi had pinned him against the backstage couch in Berlin or whether Olli had only imagined the thirst he had seen Aleksi’s his eyes. Sometimes he stayed up until morning, trying to come up with a rational explanation to why Aleksi had been texting with him throughout the night instead of being asleep next to his fiancée. 

Maybe he was just bored. Maybe he couldn’t sleep for whatever reason; literally any other reason than what Olli hoped would be the truth.

“Tell me what?” His voice was shaking, but not because of the cold.

“That I, ummm… that I’m… Oh.”

Instead of finishing what he was about to say, Aleksi reached for his back pocket and took out his phone, a soft buzz sounding from it. Another cold silence fell on them as Aleksi stared at the screen, studying the notification that had popped. Only then Olli could dare a look at the man, his face illuminated by the blue glow of the phone screen.

Olli decided he’d be better off not asking who it was that was missing him, afraid he knew the answer already. 

“Ummmm… Nevermind.” Aleksi sighed at the phone before putting it away. Then he reached his hand to brush the back of Olli’s palm lightly. Aleksi’s touch was surprisingly warm and gentle, yet it sent shivers down Olli’s spine.

“Don’t freeze yourself to death, okay? I’mma head back inside.”

Olli was left staring at Aleksi’s back before it disappeared inside the restaurant, leaving him to voice his response to the pitch-black wintery night instead.

I might as well, he said in his mind, as I’m sure it would be less painful a way to go than dying from this torture of being in love with you.

[wrongcaitlyn]

need more apollo and darren lore to see if i can relate them to back to december

you can ONE HUNDRED PERCENT relate them to back to december if you just ignore the tiny detail of them not breaking up in december (but like, who cares because it’s the VIBE that matters and in this case the vibe is definitely accurate)

i will definitely be adding more apollo and darren lore…let’s just say… archery world championships happening soon…. olympics in one year…. kayla’s an icon mastermind…..

but! some little notes in specific relation to back to december

i know you may think this is apollos pov, but after looking over the lyrics again to refresh my memory… it’s from darren’s perspective. 100%

I'm so glad you made time to see me / How's life? Tell me, how's your family? / I haven't seen them in a while

apollos family!! not referring to his dad. duh. but darren’s prob just talking abt like the 1-2 times he met will and austin as babies, he hasn’t seen them since so “a while”…. sure darren, that might be a bit of an understatement

You've been good, busier than ever / We small talk, work and the weather / Your guard is up and I know why

small talk is SO real with them. they’re so awkward esp rn. they don’t know how to talk to each other. apollo says “nice weather we’re having” completely unironically and darren responds “oh yeah it’s nice”

cue silence for like 2 minutes until apollo asks how his coaching is going and more and more stilted conversation

AND!!! they’re both busier than ever!! apollo returning to being employed (kinda? i mean, he has a job so) and darren with olympics being next year

Because the last time you saw me / Is still burned in the back of your mind / You gave me roses and I left them there to die

i don’t wanna spoil exactly how they broke up… bc me and wronghuntress had like an hour long convo abt pollen lore a few weeks back and. guys. when i tell you i am SO fucking excited to write it‼️‼️

HOWEVER. this line. is very. very. very. fitting. from darren’s pov that’s all i’m saying hereeee

bc ik in one of the other chapters i said that apollos like “i ruined his life” and he DID but also like. it’s messy. it’s so very messy.

So this is me swallowin' my pride / Standin' in front of you sayin' I'm sorry for that night / And I go back to December all the time

not technically in front of him but!! the phone call!! abt kayla!! him swallowing up his pride, and there wasn’t necessarily an apology for the… things that happened, but it’s a step forward

It turns out freedom ain't nothin' but missin' you / Wishin' I'd realized what I had when you were mine / I'd go back to December, turn around and make it alright / I go back to December all the time

change it to march and make darren a singer instead of an archer and this would be one of his songs😭😭

These days, I haven't been sleepin' / Stayin' up playin' back myself leavin' / When your birthday passed and I didn't call / Then I think about summer, all the beautiful times / I watched you laughin' from the passenger's side / And realized I loved you in the fall

god… this timeline is actually SO real. if anyone’s making a pollen playlist out there (i should probably do that when i have timeHDKDJD) THIS SONG‼️‼️‼️

anyway ofc apollo is associated with summer in darren’s brain… and also apollo def thinks of summer too when thinking of darren :)

and oh yeah, ofc apollo’s in the passenger seat. bro probably grew up with drivers and doesn’t have his license.. rip sun chariot!!! (he gets his license eventually, ofc, but only bc it’s to drive will to school)

I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile / So good to me, so right

But if we loved again, I swear I'd love you right

i mean, do these even need to be explained? well darren, i can assure you that you WILL love again. it’s what we all need

okay so. i can’t really. explain the rest of this stuff. but here are the lyrics that stand out to me SOOO much because of how they broke up. that is all i can say for now!!

And then the cold came, the dark days / When fear crept into my mind / You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye

And how you held me in your arms that September night / The first time you ever saw me cry

thank you so much for the ask!! it’s been a while since some pollen content but i swear it’s coming soon :))

[loyaltykask]

Chapter 24

@journeythroughjourneytothewest

WUKONG YOU ABSOLUTE ASSHOLE XD HE SO MEAN I LOVE IT

Wukong: You had a wild night didn't you Bajie: This is kosher being tied up!!

Even Wujing has to tease him there is no mercy for the middle child vibes

Precious

I like how they ask Wukong when they might be going there and they listen to him seriously. Like they know he is the strongest there and that he has been all around the world. Poor Sanzang being human has no idea when he could make it, whether in this lifetime or the next. But Wukong putting that tidbit of determination and will is actaully really sweet that he thinks Sanzang has a chance.

Haha Equal is Earth

Creepy fruit, however living to 47,000 is also kinda dope. Like that a fuck ton of years

These guys are just around Wukong's age. 1,212, and 1,200

These shits are like "But we Daoists and they Buddist why would we welcome them?" their teacher has to be like "Cause he a nice guy assholes now shut up and do it"

This guy is pretty generous but also what an ass. Oh sure, Sanzang gets 2 Fruits that like 94,000 years of life for his past life, TEN LIFETIMES AGO. And Wukong, Bajie, and Wujing getting nothing for being 'rowdy'

Even Wukong says this guy is full of himself which is saying SOMETHING from him.

Wukong has to pull a Sanzang life all over again and make sure no one eats his baby. These Fucking brats really are just as bad as they are in the Movies Not a single ounce of respect for Earth Even Wukong is behaving better than them

Wukong calls them FLIMFLAM

TARADIDDLE! BULL SHANK! THIS IS AN OLD MAN!

Also love that Sanzang is trying to change the subject else these two brats rile Wukong even more. Like Sanzang becoming a master of trying to dodge topics

I like how Sanzang is more worried that these brats are going to start some shit to rile Wukong up rather than Wukong actaully being riled up. Like he knows he talked to some brats but he can't change that XD just like customer server. I love that Sanzang just straight-up makes plans to fucking leave. Like "we can rest here but yeah lets gtfo" And now these boys are like "no please come in we were told to serve only you"

Bunch of two-faced assholes

Probs not even then, they represent hard Confucianism where Daoism and Buddhism are not meant to interact with one another and not even respect one another. Wukong is a legit representation of fighting that stereotype by being a symbol of both and achieving true immortality for it. Honestly, Sanzang refusing to believe those aren't real ass babies makes me wonder how fucking close to babies these fruits actaully looked liked. Like Sanzang the most gullible and naive of them all refuse to believe those are actaully ass babies XD That says something

I mean if I was eating something that looked too human I would also probs pass on it

This is honestly my favorite arc cause it is just such a 'boys will be boys' like the idea was Bajie's but he shared it with Wukong who was 100% on board, he didn't need an ounce of convincing, he just said "fuck yea, fuck those brats lets get that fruit, I'll do it myself" and then they just get Wujing his own too cause he just that good of a homie Like..... sometimes it's the stupid stuff you do together that makes it all the more memorable. Crimes committed together are enjoyed together.

WUJING WAS SO EXCITED HE WANTED TO TRY. WUKONG REALLY IS THE BEST BIG BRO HE GOT HIS HOMIE COVERED

I have to admit calling someone a baldhead is be fighting words indeed

Sanzang like: Hey even if they did commit the crime let's watch the fucking language

it's like breaking someone's sports car and being like "well we can at least say sorry, that should be enough" LIKE IF THAT IT SANZANG'S PHILOSOPHY NO WONDER HE LETS PEOPLE GET AWAY WITH SO MUCH SHIT DAMN And he still like: hmmm, doesn't sound like my boys

HE TRUSTS HIS BOYS He also got to love the homies for agreeing that snitches get stitches and that they should all lie together damnit

True brotherhood

[the-algebra-thing]

I have been keeping my schedule at least a little bit normal for the past few months like waking up before 11 and going to bed before 3. just because I know it's gonna have to be normal eventually and I thought maybe if I get better at this middle ground I can ease myself into it. long as fuck post about how it works when I sleep ahead because I'm pissed off about it fair warning.

now fun fact it takes me at least half an hour to wake up. I cannot even drag myself out of bed till I've snoozed my alarm for at least 10 minutes and then once I've woken up to that laid in bed psyching myself up for 10-20 minutes. I need at least 8 hours and it takes so much to drag my ass out of sleep. waking up feeling "well rested* might as well be a myth; I don't really wake up without being overwhelmed with how my body wants to go back to sleep. the earlier I wake up the worse it is—on days when I have to wake up at 8 to babysit I have to TEAR myself out of bed, and my stomach hurts like a motherfucker once I do get up, almost invariably.

on the flip side I can fall asleep easy at any time, but it takes longer before 2, and even longer before midnight, and also if I go to sleep before midnight I will wake up in at most 4 hours and then again and again and again during the night and struggle to get back to sleep. sometimes when I go to sleep at 9pm to wake up for my job in the morning, I get those 4 hours, and then wake up for good at 1am with absolutely no chance of getting back to sleep no matter how hard I try.

last night I went to bed at 4am bc I decided last minute instead of going to bed to get flynn to cut my hair (it is finally buzzed now I'm so happy LOLLL) and then take a shower first. did all that, fell asleep easy as hell since it was after 2. I set an alarm for noon this morning so I didn't have to worry about checking the time to see if I had under- or overslept when I woke up in the morning to roll over. when I did, the alarm hadn't gone off— turned out it was 15 minutes before it was supposed to, and I laid there for like 5 of those minutes before I even checked trying to go back to sleep, but my body literally didn't need to. i just woke right up. if id had a reason to I could've rolled out of my bed 5-10 minutes before my alarm feeling rested and awake as fuck, a feeling that doesn't really happen to me for hours when I wake up at 8. my mom had even called my phone, right next to my pillow, two hours earlier, and I don't remember it waking me up at ALL bro I was OUT.

in conclusion I had no idea the magnitude of the difference when I do it the way my body wants me to and also Why do my biorhythms hate me thus

[yell0wsalt]

and another, to indulge myself 🔀 for p'li and zaheer

Keep it lo - Ojerime

Your villains! Thanks for your asks! I took this song as a story of someone who’s independent and doesn’t care about the opinions of others. There might be a few people by their side, but it doesn’t matter: they’re fine to be on their own and live their best life.

Felt right to be talking about P’li in this AU:

–

P’li was a woman who lived outside the social norms: she was fierce, independent, built with an imposing stature and attitude to match. A woman anyone would have a hard time pinning down. Literally and figuratively. Nights in the city all one would ever be able to capture of her was the sound of a motorcycle engine purring and the blue light trail of her bike’s tail light. 

It was mesmerizing to watch.

Hidden under one of the city bridges, P’li was resting for a minute, needing a smoke break and she wanted the chance to exist in peace. 

By chance, on the other side of the underbridge in the shadows was a man sitting on the ground reclining on his own bike and looking at the stars.

He turned to her, and broke the distance between them with a simple, “Nice bike.”

Taking a drag of her cigarette, she checked him out and replied, “You, too.”

The man went on in appreciating the open skies and freedom that comes in weaving through traffic and the streets.

P’li hummed, able to reciprocate the feeling. 

The man began to talk more, but she abruptly cut him off. “You talk too much.” Instead, she offered him the chance to smoke with her.

The two became acquainted. The man, Zaheer, was the leader of a small biker gang of two other people where they would go riding all night, and embrace the feeling of not being tethered down to the world’s responsibilities and their own problems. 

He asked if she would be interested in joining them.

Gangs. Friends. Acquaintances. No thanks. P’li didn’t fuck with that vibe.

Near to finishing her smoke, P’li stomped out her cigarette butt on the ground and got ready to head out. Straddling her bike, P’li spared a glance over her shoulder and said, “Thanks for keeping me entertained,” before revving her engine.

Before he knew it, she was gone. The blue tail light of her bike shrinking into the distance.

Zaheer nodded before returning to his own bike and laying down to admire the stars once more.

This became a near weekly routine for them. There’d be weeks when P’li wouldn’t show up, but some when she would.

They tested out each other’s bikes and sometimes rode through the nights together.

When there was a desire that came to be realized and built to a peak, P’li invited herself to his bed. 

Laying there in the sheets with P’li by his side, Zaheer was staring at the ceiling before he asked what they were.

“What a ridiculous question. Does it matter what we are?” P’li simply replied. They have a good thing going, there was no need to fuck it up with labels or anything like that.

Silently, she swiveled out of his bed to find her clothes.

His eyes raked up and down her form as she got dressed. When she finished putting her clothes on, he said, “Guess not.”

The keys to her bike jingled when she grabbed them from the side table by the door. 

“Will I see you?” he asked.

Halfway out the door P’li looked back at him. She found his voice calm and expression unreadable. 

“Maybe.”

With that, she was gone.

Zaheer laid back in his sheets, releasing a heavy exhale. P’li was an enigma. A ripple in the water. If he tried to get too close, she’d pull away. 

Keep reaching out for a wave, one might find themselves in too deep. 

Zaheer groaned and aggressively wiped his face. It seemed as if he'd gotten pulled in more than he thought.

--

Fuck with these bitches / Bridges burnt down to the fucking roach / Ho, yeah, I let him go Only smoke with the bros, one side by my side / And we keep it low

🔀 and a pairing

[coffee-n-some-cream]

butch 4 butch (girls!rasey)

Ella came over to her house all the time. She crashed on the couch or sprawled on her bedroom floor. They would run amok in the streets, getting up to stupid shit, drinking too many beers for a pair of teenagers in public, hollering at each other across the street, digging through trash, wrestling each other in a park gazebo. They always stumbled into Casey’s house well after midnight, buzzed and giggling and covered with new scrapes, not even bothering to keep their voices down because when Casey’s dad had his whiskey in him a train barging into the house wouldn’t wake him up. It was nothing they’d be able to get away with at Ella’s, with her caring father and overbearing sister waiting up all hours of the night for her.

After they had gotten all their energy out, their screams and cackles and roughhousing, they would collapse in twin piles of sweaty limbs and toothy grins. And then, only then, did the quiet of the night and the shadows of Casey’s room allow the important things to be said.

“I think his drinking is getting worse.”

“You can crash at mine any time.”

“Your dad doesn’t like me. Neither does your sister.”

“Yeah, but they’re not total assholes.”

Sometimes Casey’s hand would dangle over the side of her bed, the tips of her fingers brushing the soft fabric of Ella’s t-shirt. Something so light and casual it could be an accident.

“My sisters are scared of me.”

“Scared for you, probably.”

“Shouldn’t be.”

“They love you, dumbass.”

Sometimes Ella would kick her leg up and rest it on the mattress, foot barely resting against Casey’s leg.

“What if I’m just like him?”

“Gross. You’re nothing like him.”

And sometimes they would just sprawl half over each other on Casey’s twin bed, Casey’s leg curling around Ella’s and Ella’s arm trapped under Casey’s back. As they dozed, Casey could turn her head and smell the musk of Ella’s sweat on her neck, could see the steady rise of her chest in the light of the streetlamp.

“I think I… nevermind.” 

“What?”

“Nah.”

“...Pussy.”

“Fuck you.”

Ella woke up with her arms around Casey more than once, head practically buried in her hairy armpit as Casey starfished across the bed.

“Morning, sweetheart,” Casey might drawl. “Get cold and lonely last night?”

“Holding on for dear life, more like it. I don’t know why I even try sleeping in the bed, you always try to push me out of it in your sleep.”

That summer, they played the night on repeat. Ella’s family would treat her presence as a rare occurrence. Donna would react to the sight of her with sardonic shock, Mika would needle her and beg her to stay long enough to get crushed in Super Smash Bros. Dad accepted her daily goings with wary side-eyes, and Leona seemed to oscillate between lip-pursed lectures on staying out too late and too-sincere worry about what Ella got up to.

“Going to Casey’s. I’ll be back tomorrow.”

“This is shocking news.” Donna drawled.

“Ella… Remember that Mika’s softball games start tomorrow.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Bye.”

Casey’s dad, on the other hand, barely noticed whether Casey was there or not.

“I swear, I could walk out of the house naked and throw myself into traffic and he wouldn’t even notice until the electricity got turned off because I’m the only one who remembers to pay it.”

Their evenings were spent wrapped in each other’s worlds, loud and raucous and competing to make each other laugh. The nights were cool and sticky with dried sweat and dipping their heads together in secrecy, trusting each other with the parts of their hearts that they couldn’t share with anyone else.

Casey’s eyes were brown, but looked like deep wells of black in the indigo darkness of her room. Her hair spilled inky and stringy over her mattress, escaping from her ponytail in long tangled strands. Ella’s own ponytail could barely hold together at the best of times, as short and thick as it was.

Ella toyed with the ends of Casey’s hair where they poured over the bed. “You ever wanna just… cut it all off?”

“Nah, too much work.”

“Isn’t taking care of it too much work?”

Casey’s shoulders shook with an almost silent chuckle. “Does it look like I take care of it?”

Ella snorted. “Good point.”

Casey was curled on her side on the bed, looking down at where Ella was laying on the floor, unopened sleeping bag separating her from the hardwood floor. It was a hot, sticky night. Too hot to share the bed.

“I kinda want to cut mine off. Just. Full chop.”

“Do it, then.”

“I don’t wanna deal with all the comments and shit. People will freak out.”

“Fuck ‘em.”

“Yeah.”

Ella’s fingers tangled in the ends of Casey’s hair, further up than before, and Casey felt the slight tug on her scalp. She hummed, feeling wide awake.

“Hey, what was that thing you were gonna say the other night but wimped out about?”

A long sigh. “Can you drop that?”

“Fuck no, dude. I wanna know.”

“It was stupid.”

“So? We say stupid shit all the time.”

“Uh, who’s ‘we’?”

“Fuck you.”

A snicker and another tug, this time very deliberate. Casey bit her lip because Ella wasn’t looking at her face. Her eyes were trained on the ends of her hair.

“What was it?”

Silence followed.

Casey reached down and batted at Ella’s face. Her hand was smacked away and Ella turned her head, but Casey just reached out again and stuck a finger in Ella’s ear. Her hand was smacked away again, this time harder.

“Would you fuckin’ stop?”

“What was it?”

Another sigh, and Ella glared at the ceiling of Casey’s room. Casey watched the discomfort grow on her face. She saw the moment Ella decided to tell her the truth, her eyes overtaken by regret even before she opened her mouth.

“I think I'm gay.”

Casey blinked. “Oh.”

Ella continued to stare at the ceiling. She reached up to scratch at her brow, hand hiding her eyes from Casey’s view. “Yeah.”

“That’s cool.”

A glance in her direction. “Is it?”

Casey was sure it must be showing, all the noise in her head and the bubbling over in her chest. She was sure her breaths must be coming in pants, that she must be floating off the bed a bit, that her eyes must have little cartoon hearts in them. Of course it was cool. Jesus fuck, of course it was. 

“Yeah, man.” Casey’s hand dangled down and mingled with her hair, both no longer touching or being touched by Ella. “I mean. Pretty sure I’m bi. So.”

Ella searched her face, apprehensive, like she was waiting for the other shoe to drop. “You are?”

“Yeah. Since I was, like, twelve. Thought you knew.” A shrug. “So I get it. Girls are hot.”

Ella’s eyes looked cool and colorless in the moonlight as they watched her. Casey watched her right back, thinking that in the daylight they were the warmest hazel. Ella’s breaths hitched before she evened them out again, and the silence stretched between them. Silence wasn’t something they usually did.

Casey opened her mouth to say something, and her fingers twitched forward. But Ella was so still, and she looked scared. Casey had never seen her scared. She pulled her hand up onto the bed.

“Hey. Let me cut your hair.”

A breath escaped Ella’s mouth. “What makes you think I’m gonna trust you with a pair of scissors near my head?”

“Because I’m gonna use clippers, and I’ve been cutting my dad’s hair with them since I was seven.”

“Good point.”

The soft buzz filling the room that night clung to the inside of Ella’s ears and filled her up with something warm. She sat in Casey’s desk chair and stared at the baseball bat that sat in the corner of the bedroom, broken in half and patched together with duct tape. They hadn’t bothered with a towel, so strands of soft, black hair fell over Ella’s shoulders and into her lap. She held one lock between her fingers, rolling it back and forth. Her skin tingled where Casey’s fingers ran along her scalp, her neck. Fingers pulled lightly at her hair, tousling it, and a warm shiver went down her spine.

A breeze pushed through the window and Ella could feel it against her scalp. She sighed.

A hand brushed the hair from the back of her neck, and the buzzing stopped abruptly. “We’re gonna need to hose you off. I’m itchy just looking at you. But I think you’re done.”

Ella reached up to feel her head, her breath catching at the prickly hairs against her palm. Casey turned the chair until she faced the mirror that was propped up against the dresser. Ella stared at herself.

“What do you think?” Casey grinned, the gaps in her teeth on full display. “Not counting the piles of hair all over you.”

Ella nodded, not taking her eyes away from the mirror. She looked like a different person. A stronger person. Someone Ella wished she was.

“I think you look hot,” Casey blurted when Ella didn’t answer. “The butch look suits you.”

When Ella turned to look at her, a huge smile spread across her face. It was wide and warm and ferocious, and Casey thought that smile could eat her alive if she let it.

“Yeah. I like it.”

Ella’s family didn’t freak out as much as she thought. Donna didn’t even notice that her hair was short until Mika rolled out of bed, wandered into the kitchen, and let out a piercing shriek of joy at the sight of her. Leona bemoaned Ella’s willingness to let Casey near her head with a pair of clippers, but offered a tentative smile as she said, “It looks nice.” Dad just tousled her hair with a gentle hand and remarked that it made her look so grown up, a wistful tinge to his voice.

Ella couldn’t keep her hands off her own head for the first few days. Casey got a pride-filled grin every time she caught her running a hand over the nape of her neck or palming the hair around her temples. The new hair seemed to be an excuse to get her hands in the mix as well, ruffling and mussing the short strands every chance she got so they stood up in odd spots.

The days were hotter, the sun harsher, and Casey’s A/C wasn’t up to the job. Casey declared that Ella could have the stinkin’ bed before sprawling out on the cool hardwood floor. Ella sat on the edge of the bed and looked at her. Casey’s forehead was against the floor, her hair pulled into a high ponytail to keep it off her neck, and Ella was staring at the wispy hairs at her nape. They were shiny and stuck together with sweat. Then her eyes followed the dusting of freckles along her neck. They ran up to her cheeks and behind her ears, then trailed down her shoulders and beneath the fabric of her shirt. Ella wondered, if she pulled the shirt off, how far they would go. Where the little flecks of brown would be.

“Quit staring, it’s getting me all hot and bothered.” Casey’s voice was soft and teasing, her nose scrunched.

Ella swallowed and looked away, face warming. “Weird joke.”

The room was silent for a moment. Crickets filled the night air, and a soft breeze ruffled the pages of a comic book Casey had left on the dresser.

“I wasn’t really joking.” Her voice wasn’t teasing anymore.

Ella’s heart started to hammer in her chest, and she didn’t dare look. Casey must see her breaths coming faster, the heat creeping up her neck, the sweat pooling in her collar bone.

Then Casey was in front of her, kneeling at her feet, a hand gripping the sheets next to Ella’s thigh. Ella couldn’t look away, her gaze pulled to those deep brown eyes, the way moonlight danced in them, the way they looked scared. Ella had never seen her scared.

Casey’s lips parted. “El.”

Ella’s fingers threaded with the greasy strands of Casey’s hair and pulled her forward, lips pressing harshly against hers. A gasp filled Ella’s chest at the jolt of heat that ran to her belly, and Casey’s breath warmed her cheek in a deep sigh of relief. Casey’s hands went around her waist, strong and bony and gentle, and with a little tilt of her head, she turned the kiss from something hurried and rough to something slower, sweeter. Her lips were so warm and soft against Ella’s, and it felt like she was smiling.

Ella’s hands loosened to cup her face, afraid that at any moment she would try to pull back. But she didn’t. Instead, she leaned forward, pushing herself between Ella’s knees. Ella could feel the ribbed fabric of her tank top against the inside of her thighs. Casey bit lightly at her bottom lip, and Ella sighed into her mouth.

Then Casey dipped her head and licked at the sweat along Ella’s collarbone. Ella’s hands knotted in the back of Casey’s shirt.

“Casey,” she breathed.

“El.” Casey kissed up her neck and sucked hard on the spot just under her ear.

Ella had to bite her lip to keep down her groan. “Casey, you cut my hair.”

“Sure did.” A kiss, a soft nibble, then she sucked on the skin again.

There was nothing she could do to hold back the shiver that ran down her spine, but she tugged on Casey’s hair, trying to pull her off. Casey just moaned a little and bit down on her neck harder.

“Case. My neck.” Another tug on her hair, another moan.

Casey’s lips were making obscenely wet sounds as they kissed her skin. “Your neck. Yeah.”

“Casey.” Ella finally yanked on her hair hard enough to pull her head away. “Don’t give me a hickey. I can’t cover it because you cut my hair.”

Casey’s pupils were huge, her lips swollen pink, and she stared at Ella blankly for a moment. Then understanding dawned in her eyes. “Oh, shit.” She looked at her neck. “Yeah. Um.”

“Dude, did you…?”

“Oh, yeah, I did.”

“Already?”

She nodded, eyes locked hungrily on the light bruise under Ella’s ear. “Yeah.”

Her hand slapped over the bruise, and Ella glared at Casey, which Casey thought was really hot, honestly, what with her kissed-pink lips and rosy cheeks.

“My family is gonna freak.”

Casey shrugged and grinned. “Fuck ‘em.”

“If my dad sees me with this, there’s no way I’ll be able to spend the night here anymore.”

“Oh.” Her face fell. “Shit. Do you have anything to cover it, like makeup?”

“Seriously?” Ella’s hands gestured around the room. “Me? Do you have makeup?”

Casey chewed on her lip. “The butch look has its downsides. What about your sisters?”

“Leona wears makeup sometimes, but if she sees this there’s no way she’s not snitching to Dad.” Ella rolled her eyes and ran a hand through her hair. “Mika loves makeup, but that kid can’t keep a secret to save her damn life, and Donna doesn’t touch the stuff.”

The floorboards creaked loudly as Casey stood and walked to her closet. Ella watched her rifle through it, yanking hangers against each other and digging through the pile that covered her shoes. She had thought the way she felt, if it ever managed to escape into the dark little haven of Casey’s room, would destroy their little something, rend it to pieces, stamp it into the ground and spit on it. It had been an ugly, fearful thing sitting in her chest. But it had gotten free. And Casey was the same, talked to her the same, looked at her the same. Ella thought that meant something. That the way Casey looked at her when they kissed was the same way she always looked at her.

Casey was in front of her again holding a hoodie. She snapped her fingers in front of Ella’s face. “You with me? You good?”

Ella swatted at the hand. “Quit.” She yanked the hoodie out of her hands and inspected it, feeling the well-worn fabric, sniffing it. It had the musk of a hoodie that had been worn for a while without being washed. And the sleeves had been cut off, the edges jagged and fraying like Casey had done it really quickly with a pair of dull scissors.

Casey let her look it over for a bit, then tugged on it gently, pulling it around her shoulders and putting the hood over her head. “There.” She reached into the hood and tapped the hickey, making Ella jump. “Can’t see it.”

“Your solution is for me to wear a hoodie? In summer?” Even as she spoke, her finger hooked into the loop of Casey’s jean shorts and pulled her closer.

“The sleeves are cut off, it’s cool enough.” Casey lifted one knee to rest on the mattress between Ella’s legs. “By the way, your arms are gonna look so good in that.”

“They’re definitely gonna know something’s up.”

“You got a better idea?” Casey whispered, leaning forward so her breaths puffed against Ella’s lips.

“Good point.” Ella pulled her down and kissed her again.

[devils-dares]

THIS IS NOT A HATE ANON DEVON I LOVE YOU

Anon get a life challenge. Literally people on the internet with takes like that are irrelevant.

Some of us have lives and things to do outside of working on fanfics WE put out for yall. If you fucking wanting something done asap DO IT YOURSELVES!!! telling someone to kts is literally so fucking childish, just cuz ur not getting what you want immediately.

Writing takes so much time and energy!!! @ anon YOU DONT FUCKING KNOW THIS PERSON

You don't know what the fuck they are doing outside of writing so stay in your fucking lane bro.

Devon, I hope you have a good rest of your day/night depite those absolute lugnut anons you are getting. In the end of the day, they clearly have nothing better to do, and are just garbage people who need to get over themselves. Keep going at your own pace and I hope you feel better.

thank you truly for typing this out. i don't think non-creators realize how much time, effort, and energy it takes to make something. being so blantantly for real under the cut/tw for mental and physical health, hospitals

thank you for supporting me, for being here, for reading my material, reblogging my works and leaving comments. i'll try my damndest to be here for all of you.

this past week has drained me more than anything ever has. i went from going to the college campus nurse to thinking i could die while getting fucking rushed to the hospital in an ambulance. i have been holding it fucking together at home by the seams, the literal seams. coming out of the hospital on wednesday, i was diagnosed with a rare form of complex migraine, added onto an already not widely known form of chronic dizziness, as well as possible endometriosis. i am at my fucking wit's end. i am in chronic pain. i can't fucking focus anymore. i'm crying every chance i get when i'm alone because i am overwhelmed with every single thing possible. i've been playing this game since i was 14 and i'm 19 now, and there's not going to be any improvement, and i have to come to terms with that.

for those who aren't medically dependent on someone, this might not make sense, but i need to get it off of my chest: i feel like a burden because my family is too fucking nice. they've been there every single goddamn step of the way and misstep i have hurts them too. i felt so bad laying alone in that hospital bed that when my parents burst through the doors i sobbed and apologized over and over again because i immediately knew i ruined everyone's days and weeks.

for me to come to my happy place where not really anyone knows that about me, just to be told to k word myself when i'm already fucking on the edge of it anyway is just so fucking draining. i have near nothing left to give. i'm trying my best.

[crystallllines]

right. body horror story now that it is almost 23:00 and i am in between writing scenes (and I kinda know how this next one will go).

so i’m lying in bed alone; jack wasn’t ready to sleep yet because he was stupid and took adderall too late. and i’m having trouble sleeping. one of the things that happens when i have trouble sleeping is that i become painfully aware of my body— the mass, the fat, the lack of bone definition, hair that needs waxing/shaving, zits… usually.

this night, however, my focus was drawn to something else entirely: my fucking toenails. they had gotten a little long. i thought, “ah, neat, this is actually something i can take care of myself immediately! i don’t just have to bear it and be determined to do better/different in the future!”

because idk if all people have nails like mine, but they’re pretty easy to just.. tear off when they get too long. no need for clippers.

so i reach below the blankets and i bend one knee so my foot is within reach, and i rip all those toenails off easy. nice. fucking great. i move on to the next foot: little toenail? Fine, comes off like i’m peeling off a new sticker. ring-toe? same. index toe? going great until—

that is a lot of nail coming off. either that toenail was freakishly long or— and this twists my stomach, because i have something weird about nails being ripped off— i’m peeling off all the nail— bed included. (for the record, it is not just dark, i am doing this beneath a blanket, so i can’t see shit.)

i pull a little more until— until it gets to the very edge and then i’m squicked out. i’m remembering the time i was 8 or 9 or 10 and i tripped on my across the street neighbors’ stone stairs and ripped off my big toenail, remembering how much that fucking bled. and omg i do not want to bleed all over those sheets, this blanket, my pajamas, and i do NOT want to rip off my whole nail.

i’m a little loopy at this point because i did take my sleeping meds. so the notion of putting my nail back in place? makes perfect sense. i climb out of bed and kinda limp-hop out to jack, because if anyone can put my toenail back on, it’s jack.

i still haven’t taken the time to look at it. the only time i see it is when i put my foot on the couch arm rest closest to jack and he reaches down and just plucks it off and tosses it in the ashtray.

on the one hand, i am relieved that i didn’t have to do that because i was imagining the skin getting caught and accidentally ripping off a small strip of skin down my toe (i think there is a scene in black swan like this, but with fingers, and uhhh… no me gusta, bro. it might be another movie.).

on the other hand, HE WAS SUPPOSED TO PUT IT BACK ON.

anyway, i wrapped it up in a bandaid that needed to be changed the next day because it was sooooo bloody. and by the end of the day, THAT one was soooo bloody. by the third day, it wasn’t bleeding anymore, so i felt safe (but reluctant) to go bandaid-free.

and let me tell you i have never felt more vulnerable in my life for like two days. not just physically vulnerable, but somehow emotionally vulnerable, too. all because my left index toe doesn’t have its little protective shield. it was fucking ridiculous.

Anyway, bio is nice so far. my instructor is a faculty member i befriended during my first month ever taking college classes (we had plans to go shopping together, until she found out I was a student, ooops!) and i’m very excited to be in her class. but she keeps talking about how science is scary— and i understand why, because, like, she’s trying to validate people who are scared of science classes, although… idk, i mean, i suppose they exist, but it would never occur to me to be scared of science classes (physics? maybe). and it’s sort of a bummer every time she says it. but it’s gucci, it’s fine.