#i mean its harming my partners opinion of me but

[prey-femme]

.

every time i cant hold it back i pretend i had a nightmare as an excuse but honestly i think they're starting to catch on

there's only so many nightmares one person can have in a limited span of time

[walnutcookie]

fandom can be awful sometimes so heres a few reminders for my beloved mutuals:

- do whatever you want forever. if its not harming anyone or yourself you are amazing and you should continue doing it if it makes you happy

- ship wars/discourse suck ass. if its not a proship its fine, if someone has a different ship than you or interprets a ship differently you dont have to fight with them.

- your ocs are the best thing on this planet and you should share them

- your oc x canon is so wonderful and lovely and you should share it

- the ocs you created to be family members of other characters are awesome and you should share them

- your headcanons and interpretations of characters are awesome and you should share them

- hit that character with the beam. you know you want to. make them trans, make them gay, make them poc, make them disabled, make them fat, whatever makes you happy

- if someone is mean to you blow them up (hit the block button)

- be nice to others. support their art, their stories, their ocs and headcanons and ships, even if you arent very interested in them. stay curious!! ask about peoples ideas, because most of the time they want to share just as much as you do

- if other people have different interpretations or ideas, you dont have to agree or disagree with them. its okay to appreciate others opinions without telling them that theyre wrong

- if anyones ships/ideas/etc make you too uncomfortable, block them.

- if someone is too annoying to see in the tags, block them.

- if anyone is mean to you, block them. especially hate anons

- write whatever you want always. draw whatever you want always. draw those girls kissing draw that enby covered in blood write about that man going to see the dentist

- draw them as furries, as dragons, as humans, as objects, whatever your heart desires

- your selfship partner loves you always

- people arent always right about characters. sometimes theyre way far from canon, and its not really your place to correct them. if it makes you too uncomfortable block them.

- some people choose to not follow canon. do what you want forever, you are always right about your blorbo. you are not limited to canon or what the fandom depicts the character as

- dont be the one to send anon hate

- its okay to be a hater and a lover. you can hatepost on your blog just as much as you lovepost. just dont main tag it (thats mean) and dont add it onto other peoples posts who like what youre hating on (thats also mean)

- if someone is hating on something you like, its best not to engage with it.

feel free to add anything i missed :] i love u mutuals you should tell me everything about your ocs and ships and headcanons forever. pls

[fizzbot]

APOLOGY TOUR SPOILERS / HELLUVA BOSS CRITICAL POST

(please just dont read if youre a fan/are gonna be annoying in my tags/replies)

i LOVE verosika. i was super excited to see an episode all about her. she has EVERY right to be mad at blitz, and i do enjoy seeing things from the perspective of his victims. BUT.....i was really disappointed in her portrayal in apology tour. MOSTLY just because i was dissapointed in stolas portrayal in apology tour, and think this ep wouldve been better if it was more about BLITZ instead. rant under the cut

im not gonna give the whole rant about how annoying it is that stolas is constantly woobified, because 100 critical blogs have done it much more gracefully than i ever could. but it is just SO dissapointing to watch a man that couldve been SUCH a compelling villain be the ONLY one who is EVER sympathized with in the show. we are supposed to feel bad for him and believe that both sides are wrong in the stolitz situation, when stolas' crimes are SO MUCH WORSE than all of blitzs bad deeds combined. he co-erced blitz into a sex contract as the only means of doing his job, and then made HIM feel guilty for not falling n love with him during it. the 'both sides are in the wrong' comment gets particularly frustrating when the show has, tme and time again, only let stolas be the one with support. blitz is made to look unreasonable, no matter how right he is. and, in this instance, stolas is the one getting invited to this party to celebrate being ""wronged"" by blitz.

back to verosika. especially now that the episode is out, i am even more firmly on her side. the fact that blitz broke up with HER because things were getting too serious is interesting (albiet not as interesting as i think it couldve been but thats a rant for another post). im not saying she should forgive blitz, but i do struggle to fully agree with her because of how she treated stolas in the episode. she is the first to comfort him, the first to try and encourage him to shit-talk blitz, etc etc and i just dont understand.....why?

ive already had problems with her character since the sexual assault ""joke"" from spring broken, but this also really left a bad taste in my mouth. i totally understand her desire to party and sympathize with other people who were harmed by blitz, but its frustrating that stolas was invited to be among them. stolas, the man who is very much NOT THE VICTIM in his relationship with blitz. this is more the fault of the writers than verosika herself, but it is SO FRUSTRATING that she gave him the spotlight and is trying to help him heal from a situation that is ENTIRELY HIS FAULT. stolas didnt just hurt blitzs feelings, he sexually coerced and abused him. of all people, shouldnt verosika understand how terrible that can be? the kind of hurt that can do to a person? im not saying that this terrible relationship FORGIVES blitz's wrongdoings, but you shouldnt be giving his fucking abuser a stage and a microphone to talk shit about his victim. this becomes so much more insidious to me with the conversation she has with blitz on the balcony, later. this was actually a pretty good scene imo but it could certainly be better.

this is much more opinionated and i wouldnt be surprised if even the critical community isnt with me on this one, but i long for an alternate verson of this episode thats focused on verosika being on blitz's side, instead. its been over 5 years since they dated, and even though she is still allowed to be mad, it would be nice to see that shes moved on. maybe give her a new partner like barbie wire and let her throw these parties just so she can look back and laugh and help blitz's other victims heal in the same way that she has. not to bring up an also not-great show, but in rick and morty, we see a relationship between rick and one of his ex-partners named unity. they were really terrible for each other, enabling bad/unhealthy behaviors, generally being awful. their break-up was messy, but in recent seasons, we see unity coming back, upon hearing that rick was doing something self-destructive. they worried about him, because a part of them still cared, as much as they were hurt by his actions. i would have LOVED to see a similar thing with blitz and verosika, where verosika finds out about the relationship blitz is trapped in/just got out of. i think it would be SO MUCH MORE naratively interesting, for her to be supportive of his little apology tour, and maybe even inviting HIM to the "blitzo sucks" party. not everyone (or anyone) needs to forgive him; in fact, i think coming to this party would give him perspective. his relationship with stolas has hurt him so badly, he can finally step back and understand the harm that he did to all these people. the apologies that he gave, as he admits in the episode, were shallow. but i think framing stolas as the toxic one would be better in helping him realize that he has done wrong more than what the show is currently doing. and maybe some people at the party WILL forgive him. maybe he can apologize on the stage, and some people will empathize with his situation and believe that the apology is genuine, because hes finally had to be on the other end of his own hurt. and maybe THAT would be the first step in helping blitz realize that maybe he isnt completely unlovable, because there are people who cared about him enough to be THIS DEVASTATED upon getting their heart broken by him. a conversation with verosika about what he did to her would hit so much harder after this, imo

anyway. im sorry if this is completely incoherent/a bad point. i was just thinking about it and i am so sick of everyone being a stolas apologist </3

[genderkoolaid]

I understand if this is not the kind of ask you usually get, but you sometimes post about youthlib so. How would one deal with disliking their peers and some slightly younger people as a young adult? I logically know that no age group is a monolith but I just mean, interacting a lot with people of my age and somewhat younger has really disillusioned me, I don't seem to find any happiness in being around most of them. I sometimes think of my own being a relatively young adult as negative. Im aplatonic and don't want friends and I was miserable when I tried to make myself make friends mainly with peers.

I only talk to people for specific reasons but may just generally joke around with them or make small talk briefly without forming a bond. My partners are mostly somewhat slightly older than me, but one is my age, and I like all of them more than I like other people. Other people I generally just see neutrally and don't wish for them to come to harm.

I think Ive often been annoyed by my peers due to not fitting in and sometimes being treated in toxic or abusive/bullying kind of ways by peers, or from sensory issues because they all talk so much you could probably hear them from another floor. I think its things like that that make me generally unable to feel positive about my peers, along with seeing so many rancid discourse takes online come from the young adults and teenager age groups.

And I understand how being around my age makes people vulnerable to harmful ideology too but its so tiring to see a shit take then see like '22' or '17' on the persons bio.

(Im 21 for reference)

I think it's important to recognize that our emotions and our political philosophies are not tied together. You don't need to feel the right feelings in order to advocate for youth liberation. If you accept these ideas intellectually, and you are cognizant of your emotions and how they affect you, then you can make the choice to not let those emotions shape your actions.

It's important to engage with people outside your age group (or the age group you spend the most time around), but that doesn't need to be friendship. It's alright to engage with others in your communities without wanting friendship. You know, intellectually, that there are young people who are quiet, not interested in friendship, have nuanced opinions on things, etc. It's good to expose yourself to proof of this, but you don't have to do that through feelings of love and friendship.

The Internet is full of shitty opinions and youth, so obviously you are going to see a lot of youth with shitty opinions. But there's plenty of adults with shitty opinions, and youth with solid ones. Confirmation bias is a tricky bitch. I would recommend focusing less on how you feel, & more about how you act. Don't pressure yourself to like your peers or befriend people when it makes you miserable. Put that energy into talking about ageism, fighting KOSA laws, and consciously combatting your own bias. Accept that you feel what you feel, ask yourself what you value, and then find what harmonizes those two.

[zvezdacito]

// TWST Book 7 spoilers, thoughts of Malleus's writing as a character

So I was reading some other people's opinions on why some people consider Malleus overrated/annoying, and tbh this makes me really sad. The general consensus is that a lot of people fixate on certain sides and can only see him as one extreme or the other and it results in many ppl thinking a watered down version of his character is how he is in canon.

I feel that its such a shame because he's the most interesting, compelling and well-rounded take on his character archetype I've seen.

From my observation, usually they kinda make this archetype (the broody misunderstood 'everyone fears him like a monster except for one special person') someone you can't take that seriously, because of how his struggle usually kind of written in a way where everyone involved feel less like actual fully fledged original characters and really just one note tropes interacting with other one note tropes.

To elaborate: What i mean when i say this is usually ppl who hate him kind of just do because of plot requires them to and to show how all their haters are "normies" who can't get him because 'he's not like everyone else'. The misunderstood guy still usually has toxic personality issues but the story really tends to make it feel like they don't fear him for that but because they're shallow and have prejudice to ppl like him, so his personality issues are not framed as wrong or character flaws.

I don't think there's anything inherenrly wrong or mediocre with the "one special person who gives him a chance before anyone else" trope like I'm literally a Malleyuu enjoyer lol but like i said its all in the execution cause otherwise it fails to be compelling and believable. Usually in the poorly written version of this trope the guy doesn't undergo any character development other than showing more emotion and kindess to his partner because they melted his ice I guess so it really makes his whole character feel like its revolves around the sake of romance and fanservice.

Malleus doesn't fall into this trap in my opinion because his situation despite how fantastical it is, the way he was written makes it believable as to why everything is the way it is with him, and it also challenges the viewer if they would be able to say they wouldn't fear him too in that situation.

"We're gonna give you this character who everyone sees as a monster and show you deep down he just wants the same love as everyone else, making you contemplate changing judgement on him. He wants to prove this, but his way of going about it always inadvertently harms others."

"You know where hes coming from and if he had that social connection to give him a better understanding of others this wouldn't be happening, but its also equally understandable that the people hes trying to connect with don't deserve this and fear him even more after this, trapping him in a cycle of isolation."

"Given his track record, do you go about giving him a chance or just considering the repeatedly proven danger he brings. With the valid reasons of both parties, can you really say he isn't a monster and demand that 'if only people be near him'?"

There's just such a tragic and thought-provoking dilemma to his character that adds so many layers that makes him so good.

As omniscient viewers we have the benefit of seeing what he's going through form his POV so we can sympathize with him and understand that he thinks what he's doing is the best course of action and he's just trying to create a "win for everyone" situation.

But also everything he does ironically reaffirms everyone's fear and distrust of someone like him. No one can deny he has a tendency to cause further destruction when he tries to do something "good", examples including: past Briar Valley lantern lighting fire, the Halloween 2 ghost world party, and now his Sleeping Curse stunt in Book 7 Part 2 (they really emphasize this by making the spoken name of his UM basically mean "Malicious Fairy" but have its written name used to convey what its meant to mean be "Blessing").

↑ Given this, it honestly makes sense others, especially those who don't know him all that well, would just expect the worst when he's around already, and you wouldn't be able to blame them for that given the track record. It doesn't help that this impression is worsened since he tends to cause misunderstandings due to his lack of familiarity with human social cues.

Alongside the bias and preconceived notions from his status and reputation, they also make a point on how his personality flaws are still also a huge factor in pushing people away, such as not being able to see things through the perspective of others.

He also holds a subconcious belief due to what has been ingrained in him since childhood as a Draconia and the next in line that because he's superior to others at certain things, he has the right and responsibility to decide on what will protect and help them, disregarding the individual values/priorities of human beings and leading him to take reckless and destructive action with good intentions.

His upbringing, character strengths and character flaws are all realistically connected to each other and the way they are subtly shown to be ever-present in defining his decisions, goals and thoughts throughout the whole story. So we don't really need to have a character go out of their way to exposition this to us this word for word just so we can understand and believe it.

Moving onto something slightly more lighthearted, I really also like how dorky Malleus surprisingly was. Other similar characters in the archetype I usually see don't really have any hobbies, interests, or quirks outside of being a broody authority figure, which might've been appealing to some at first but it really just gets stale and boring after a while.

This should be the bare minimum in making a fleshed out and interesting character so maybe i sound like im giving them too much credit for pointing it out😭 But yeah compared to the other examples it's good that Malleus has his Tamagotchi and Gargoyle interests it makes him feel like a believable person who has his own life going on too (with the bonus that these interests are also metaphors for aspects of his character). The gap moe adds an endearing side to him, and makes the gap between his intent and impact of his actions even more tragic. It wouldn't hit the same without this side.

(^ Forgot how the exact quote goes, but it basically said dark stories are more effective when there are moments of genuine happiness and good in them, compared to if it was always just grim and edgy. The former increases the stakes and tragedy because you have something you to care about losing, while for the latter there is nothing for you to care about so nothing the story does really matters. Same logic applies to Malleus)

Overall, it's just like an unfortunate incompatibility of goals and circumstances, which is what TWST is all about. Another thing I want to say is out of all the characters, I feel like Malleus is the one who is the ultimate embodiment of TWST's main themes:

-> How it's not about "hero" vs "villain" just differing circumstances crossing paths and clashing because of how people on either side have their own complex perspective and dreams they want to realize

-> And how connection and finding community is important to find people who will help you make up for what you lack in reaching your goals and to better understand all the factors that caused the situation in the first place.

As if seeing yourself reflected in a mirror, the more you get to know the people around you, you realize in many ways you are actually quite alike, and through understanding others you could also possibly better understand certain aspects of yourself. It's sort of encouraging you to do the opposite of dehumanizing others and yourself, which is something Malleus has most evidently internalized.

So yeah this was so long😭 I had a lot I wanted to say since Malleus is my favorite TWST character. Idk if I missed anything or if i managed to express my thoughts in a cohesive way but yeah. I kinda go into a rage whenever I see the worst takes ever be put out about his character but tbh sometimes I can't completely blame others since fandom trends and the convenience of simplifying things into tropes can warp your perception of a character and what you associate with them.

Also sometimes twst doesn't do a good job with utilizing his character like Book 5 where he got turned into a deus ex machina and Halloween 2 where they killed any hype and intrigue for the plot we had at the beginning through the ending reveal and gave the worst justification ever for Malleus and Lilia's actions ever.

Regardless, I hope more people manage to move past this and appreciate his character for what it really is soon though. He's an amazingly tragic character; a lot of thought was put into how his experiences, strengths and weaknesses would convincingly connect, and he represents something relevant in the story's plot and themes.

The fact that I've seen some people unironically believe that Malleus may just be faking his cluelessness of social cues to hide his "true evil" is evidence to how convincing his character's situation is, that even some in the audience who know more about him than the characters would still end up in the same place of doubt and distrust of Malleus because of what he's capable of.

Aight thank you for reading👍

[axel-ambassador]

So someone made an hour long video (that I didn't watch) about why Whatever It Takes is the worst song in Hazbin Hotel

So I'm gonna talk about why it's one of the best.

Disclaimer

Again, I haven't watched the video, so I don't know what their points are. But I'm not here to argue with their opinion. I'm here to get my own contrary opinion out there. Whoever they are is entitled to like and dislike whatever song they desire, even if I personally disagree. I have nothing against them and this is not made to antagonize them in any way shape or form.

Alright let's get into it

So let's start with Carmilla since there's a bit less to talk about compared to Vaggie.

The song starts as a soft ballad. As it progresses, we get to see more insight into who she is as a person, and not just as an overlord.

I always thought

That I would keep blood off my face

But when that thing attacked

I had to act

To cross that line and keep them safe

She is not a violent person. She never meant to kill the exorcist that attacked her and her daughters. She never wanted to, but she had to, because family is what's most important to her. Not money, not power, not souls, but family.

To further highlight this we get

But if anyone knew

Then all of Hell would rise to war

And who's to say who'd survive the fray?

I might lose the ones that I was killing for

As much as she's willing to fight for those that she loves, it scares her. She doesn't want to fight, because any possible gain that could come from it pales in comparison to the mere thought of putting Clara, Odette, and even Zestial in danger.

It's agonizing.

It's a rare moment of vulnerability from her. All the cards are on the table and her heart is on her sleeve. All in front of the people she cares most about. She may be vulnerable, but she's still secure about herself and is willing to share her deepest fears with them.

She will do whatever it takes to keep them safe, even if it means going to war and fighting until they no longer can. She will make every mistake if it means keeping them free from harm.

This is where we begin to draw the parallel to Vaggie, who we'll get to soon enough. They both make promises to protect their loved ones even if it means putting themselves on the line.

Carmilla is loyal as a fault to the people she cares about. A trait that can be dangerous if you don't have enough self preservation when the time comes to fight tooth and nail for your life.

Which is why she ends up doing something that goes against her morals: Killing.

And this is why Vaggie benefits so much from having her as a mentor, but more on that later.

So from a few verses we clearly understand who Carmilla is as a character. She's fierce, loyal, protective, and not afraid to put her morals aside if it means protecting her loved ones. Her parallel to Vaggie sets up for an interaction later down the line, where their similar yet different mentalities meet.

Speaking of everybody's favorite fallen exorcist...

If you ask me, Vaggie's part in this song hits so much harder for a multitude of reasons.

Let's start with the abundance of wonderful foreshadowing.

When I saw your face

You made me feel like a stranger in a brand new place

And it felt so good to be understood

But there's so much I wished that I could say

On its own, it makes you question what's below the surface. What is she talking about? What is she hiding? There's certainly more context that we're yet to see.

And then once we learn who Vaggie really is and how she met Charlie...

Suddenly it has so much more weight.

Charlie is an understanding person, she said so herself. In that moment, it didn't matter who Vaggie was or where she came from. All that mattered was getting her the help she needed.

So I

I'll be your armor

Do whatever it takes

I'll make the mistakes

I'll spend my life being your partner

Vaggie is eternally grateful for this. Because Charlie both literally and metaphorically saved her. Charlie becomes her rock, her world, and she does the only thing she knows how to in order to repay that kindness.

Serve and protect.

And I will try to make your dreams come true

Whatever we go through

Many call Chaggie's dynamic toxic because of this, which is not the case. Their relationship is not toxic. Vaggie has a toxic mentality that the only reason worth living is to be of service, but that does not make their relationship toxic.

Charlie never exploits this trait. She never takes advantage of Vaggie's giving nature, because she is also a giving person and treats Vaggie with the same love and adoration that Vaggie does. Yes, she can be dismissive, yes, she can be lightly oblivious to people's feelings, but never is there any intention of malice behind it. And when Charlie oversteps any boundaries, they talk things out.

Chaggie is not toxic. Vaggie is toxic towards herself.

Vaggie, unlike Carmilla, is insecure. She is alone. She's hiding things.

She can't possibly tell Charlie how she feels, because that would involve explaining everything she had been hiding, and in turn losing everything she had. She's scared.

She, like Carmilla, is willing to put everything on the line if it means keeping Charlie safe. The difference is that Vaggie was made to fight. It's the only thing she knows. She doesn't cast her morals aside, because fighting is her morals.

Carmilla and Vaggie are 2 sides of the same coin. Both are willing to put their life on the line to fight for their loved ones.

Carmilla doesn't want to fight, but is willing to put that aside for the sake of her family.

Vaggie only wants to fight, and thinks that's the only thing she can do for her family.

So when they finally meet, their ideals clash, and they make a compromise.

And this was all established through one incredible song.

Character moments aside, there are some other things that cement this song as a Top 3 Hazbin song for me.

Up until this point in watching the show, I wasn't fully onboard with the musical aspect. My friends and I would groan and complain every time a song came on and disrupted the plot. Up until this one.

This was the first song that really piqued my interest. This was the first song I watched and said "I'm gonna listen to this later."

This was the first song that I listened to for hours on loop on Spotify as I did my homework in my dorm. This was the first song that made me say, "wait a minute, these guys know what they're doing."

This song made me fall in love with Hazbin Hotel.

Maybe I'm biased because I love Vaggie and Stephanie Beatriz but frankly, I don't care.

Whatever it Takes is a wonderfully underrated song and I'm happy to share why I personally love it.

Thanks for reading ^⁠_⁠^

[andy-wm]

3D by JK (feat. JH) - my take.

Ok, unpopular opinion maybe, and I might get my ass beaten for this (not in a good way 🤣)

Feel free to disagree RESPECTFULLY.

Disclaimer: If anyone comes at me with that cancel bullshit I will block you, because we all get to have an opinion.

If my post enrages you, scroll past until you can be civil, then come back and talk. Or block me. I dont mind.

And don't tell me that because I don't love this song I have to hand in my ARMY card... I'm not going to.

🙂💜🙂

I'll start by saying I love JK so, so much. Adore him. Will always support him.

But for me, 3D is a misstep.

My feeling is Hybe should have reconsidered releasing it as it is.

JK's lyrics are fun and sexy. The innuendo is on point. The melody is great and the chorus has excellent sing-along value. Even though I'm not a huge pop music fan, I like the vibe.

The MV dancers are awesome, and I got a kick out of the fire hydrant metaphor.

And in that jacket with nothing under it, JK looks hot enough to melt asphalt.

However....

Including Jack Harlow's rap IMO is a mistake. It sucks, frankly. Not in a good way.

It not only misses the mark on the tone of the rest of the song but his lyrics are really just offensive. Misogynistic. And racial refrences are just... not cricket. It's 2023 not 1995, regardless of what his hairstyle tells you.

His lyrics sound like an incel bragging about their sex life when all they've ever done is watch porn. From his words, I doubt he knows how to please any person but himself.

His message is gross, but its still just... generic. Like he went to urban dictionary for spicy language and then googled how to treat women like shit. There's nothing original about what he's saying. He's not even being gross in an intersting way. It's gross AND boring.

(Jack, if you're reading this, sorry my guy you gotta do better.)

I've been army since 2018 and this is the first BTS song I have tried to find merit in and given up.

I honestly tried to be into it and i just... can't. It doesn't sit well with me.

This is a new experience for me because even when BTS release something i don't immediately love, i still stream and watch and let it sink in, or I work on figuring out what I am missing and why it's ACTUALLY good even if i can't grasp it.

This... it's just... not good, in my opinion.

I have to clarify here...

It isn't about explicit content, i am totally down for that. If anyone read my post on Seven, they will know my response to that song. In a nutshell, I believe all adults who want to, should happily and shamelessly be doing ALL the horizontal tango. Every type, every day, in every way. With anyone and everyone they fancy as long as all parties are informed and consenting adults who are equally enjoying the experience.

Yes. I am all about getting down.

That doesn't mean treating your partners like a body count or using and abusing them with no consideration. That's not cool.

**PSA: please be safe and use protection. Get tested regularly if you have multiple partners. Don't do anything you don't feel good about and dont stay with partners who harm or manipulate you 💜**

Now, back to the smut.

Some criticisms i saw of Seven were about how dirty it was. A few people were upset because JK said fuck, and because he sang about how and when he liked to fuck. But more criticism was levelled at Letto. Why?

It seemed like it was because she's a woman, singing about sex.

Letto totally owns her sexuality and she knows what she wants. I snorted with delight at how deliciously filthy her lyrics were. Some very clever wordplay made her verse so visceral, and pretty shocking to the pearl-clutchers, without her ever saying anything directly. I really enjoyed it.

She was telling us straight up how good she is in bed. Good for her. She totally rocks. And she wasn't disrespecting anyone. She didn't need to do that to make herself cool AF.

The difference between Letto's rap and jack harlow's is that jack sounds like he's just looking at the women he's singing about as a hole to stick his dick in. Women have fought for long enough for equality and respect. They don't need this bullshit. You can sing about getting down, and you can be absolutely filthy and nasty and wild, and you can do it without degrading your partners.

I did read a theory about this song being social commentary on toxic masculinity. You can find it here and you can read it below:

Its not bad as a theory. At least it wouldn't be if Namjoon or Yoongi or Hobi - or Jungkook himself - had written the song. If that were the situation we'd see some inkling of self awareness in the rap, and maybe a hint of character development. But there's none.

Sorry ARMY, this is not the class of lyricism we have come to expect.

If jack is trying to make a social statement^*, or play a character, he is not succeeding in showing any growth or humanity at all. He's really just that stereotype.

In the last few lines, after he offers to fly his victim from Korea to Kentucky, he says "and you ain’t gotta guarantee me nothing I just wanna see if I get lucky."

How considerate...

All I see is zero care factor about the actual person he's trying to get with. Which is quite different from JK's lyrics, which show awareness that he's interacting with a conscious, living human being, not a piece of furniture.

jack follows with "I just wanna meet you in the physical and see if you would touch me"

Ugh. Not with a ten foot pole, douchebag.

And how about, in his first verse "All my ABGs get cute for me"

Good god, really? Is he seriously saying this?

So its a no for me.

The ONLY saving grace is that there's an alternative version which is pretty fun. It's almost as if Hybe knew we would hate the version with jack harlow. Wow, such insight!

Now, i know that's not the only reason they made an alternative. They needed a clean version for US radio play (let's be real, what possible other purpose can this song serve? *°)

But they could have censored jack's... actually they couldn't. The rap verses can't be salvaged. They genuinely have no merit, the only hope for the song is totally removing them.

What does that tell you?

ARMY will no doubt still chart the main track but personally, I would feel morally compromised if i supported that version. So I'll stick to the alternative and hope for better things to come.

------------

^* Stylecaster doesnt think so either. I visited their website to check thr lyrics. They said, of D3, "Meanwhile, Jack Harlow brings the cool with his two verses as he raps about all the women he could pull"

Uh, really? I hope that's intended to be ironic.

*° The MV had only 4.5million views after 12 hours. And we know what brilliant strategists Hybe employs. I am travelling in Korea right now. There was no promo visible here. And it was no accident that it was released at lunchtime on Chuseok - the biggest famiily holiday of the year - when relatively few people in Korea would be available to engage with it. THEY KNEW IT WAS A STINKER.

[that-ari-blogger]

Content. Warning. (Poison)

Hazbin Hotel has a predicament that I haven’t really come across anywhere else. The episode that I would use to recommend this series is also the episode that I would use to recommend people away.

I would recommend another tale for the characters and the storyline and how the writers weaved in a dissection of subject matter more nuanced than I expected. But Hazbin Hotel is, in my opinion, at its best when it deals with that material front and centre.

There’s a reason I have titled this post what I have. Episode four of this series isn’t shy about what it’s talking about. But there’s an interesting difference between the idea of something being subtle and something being nuanced, and there’s also another weird thing about this episode and especially the first song contained therein.

Masquerade feels like it is written by a comedian, and I mean that in the most straight faced, complimentary way possible.

Let me explain.

CONTENT WARNING: (Mention of Abuse, Mental Health, Sexual Assault, Addiction, Bodily Harm)

SPOILERS AHEAD: (Hazbin Hotel, Six)

I am an absolutely awful judge of the cultural zeitgeist, but I have observed that the music I like rarely gets described as “pop”. Partially, this is because I see a bunch of people liking a specific thing and I walk in the opposite direction, but partially this is because my musical taste isn’t limited to any specific genre.

My main musical tastes are centred around the emotionality of the song, rather than the musical distinctions. I will look at Harry Styles’ Watermelon Sugar and think it’s nice to listen to, but I will gravitate towards Olivia Rodrigo’s Vampire because of the emotional journey that song takes me on. The former of those two makes you want to dance; the latter makes you want to shout your rage at the sky.

Naturally, this leads me to ballads, songs that tell a story. The Crane Wives are particularly good at these, Curses is the archetypical example of a tale of personal guilt. But, for the sake of a constant thematic, let’s talk about Bitter Medicine for a moment.

“I bite my tongue to keep the worst of the words in So they don’t hurt nobody but me Swallow the poison I wanna spit Bitter medicine I think it’s making me sick Don’t look up to me I’m not as tall as you think You see, I talk a big game But it’s bullshit”

Bitter medicine is about bad coping mechanisms, kind of. The Crane Wives excels at exploring powerful emotions but leaves the scenarios open to interpretation. It’s not how you got here that matters, but where “here” is.

This is why the same few of their songs have gained popularity in Asexual spaces as well as in spaces for those recovering from their own actions. Reformed abusers and aces don’t tend to share much, except for a feeling of guilt.

It’s an unfortunate part of the ace experience that the realising of who you are feels like a betrayal. It feels like you have strung someone along with promises you can’t keep. I’ve been there, and it feels awful.

I do want to stress that this isn’t betrayal in reality. Being ace does not make you a bad person, you haven’t actually strung someone along. You are valid, end of argument.

The issue is that the mind isn’t always a rational thing. Sometimes it internalises things in an unhealthy way. Odds are the partner who you think you betrayed wouldn’t agree with you on that. People that like you have a habit of supporting you.

Essentially, part of being ace is that self-imposed guilt. Not every ace goes through it, but for those who do, that feeling is difficult to overcome.

But that idea of being the reason a relationship fallen apart has a lot of other applicable situations, hence the diversity of popularity.

Bitter Medicine isn’t about that, its about guilt for feeling bad. Its about the type of trauma response that is selfishness masquerading as selflessness.

The emotion on display is pain, with a song about bottling up everything until it explodes. You can’t be angry, you can’t be sad, you can’t let people help you because "there’s nothing wrong". You just have to keep things tight to your chest and let other people suffer. This is a song about becoming distant from those who can see you hurting and can’t do anything to help you.

It's about how bad coping mechanisms act as a poison that can’t be escaped, almost like an addiction.

The music video centres around the idea of others getting caught up in the crossfire of internal emotions. It’s monochromatic so you can see the stains left behind even more starkly, and those stains get everywhere. The protagonist has to be rescued by these others, but she has to let them.

You will notice that ballads don’t usually tell you the events of their stories. Everything is a metaphor; everything is a symbol. Sometimes a song will tell you outright what’s going on. That’s a strength of the medium, not a plot hole.

Which leads me to a song called Poison, a ballad that is entirely centred around the metaphor of its title.

Poison was written by Alice Cooper (with help from Desmond Child and John McCurry) and released in 1989 as a single, and it is surreal.

It’s about Cooper’s alcohol and drug addictions, which is weird considering the lyrics are ostensibly about someone he’s in a relationship with, and that’s the point.

The song depicts Cooper’s addiction as an abusive relationship, dedicating the song to that part. It’s singing to “you”, as if he’s in conversation with it, telling it to its face all the damage that he has taken.

This is personification, ascribing a will to an inanimate object, although its more than that. In this case, it’s ascribing an attraction to the object, a seductiveness. He blames himself for falling for a trap and frames the song as his own realisation of his agency. He got himself into this situation, he recognises what the problem is, he decides where to go from here.

I want to highlight that the central metaphor is used differently in both songs mentioned above. That’s part of the fun of literary analysis. Everything works together to provide context for everything else.

Poison is a song about alcoholism, so it uses the titular concept to focus on the realisation and consequences. Bitter Medicine focuses on how the poison masquerades as a cure to emphasise its point about bad coping mechanisms being traps. Hazbin Hotel’s Poison is the opposite of all these things.

The song in Hazbin Hotel is about an abusive relationship, and it uses the poison to step in for the addictiveness of that. It’s a reverse of Alice Cooper’s song, comparing a person to a drug rather than the other way around.

It is also gloriously unsubtle in a way that is really difficult to explain, so I’m going to have to use another, wildly different example.

I recently read a book called This Gilded Abyss. It’s by Rebecca Thorne (@rebeccathornewrites), and it struck me as a book that was graceful in the same way that a person can be “cool”. It’s not pompously dancing around clever wordplay. The book feels like the art is in the tale, rather than the telling, and I mean that in the best way. It’s more art than form.

The reason I bring this up is because that is the same feeling I get from listening to Hazbin Hotel’s Poison. There are cool details in the presentation, sure, but they are outshone entirely by the emotion on display. I don’t listen to the song or read the book to dwell on the fine details, not because they aren’t there, but because the story has me in a death grip and I am too enthralled by it to pay attention.

I could talk about how Poison uses high notes to ground itself, I could talk about how the songs instruments imply a fakeness. But that doesn’t seem like the point to me. Instead, I want to elaborate on what I said earlier about this song and comedy writing.

The song isn’t funny, per say. If you were insincere, you could point out that this is about a spider singing to a moth, so haha jokey joke joke. But that’s the key. Sincerity.

The golden rule of comedy is “commit to the bit”. It’s less funny to draw back and undercut yourself than it is to subvert expectations or do something dumb and go for it, despite seeing it coming a mile away.

I was a theatre kid (if you are shocked by this, welcome to the blog), and I remember being told by the theatre sports coach that for a joke to be funny, it can never be acknowledged as such. I don't know how much I agree with this, but it's a useful idea.

Hazbin Hotel does this in a big way with its entire design. It’s set in hell, and the main character is the most optimistic person you will ever meet. Pentious is a villain, and also a goober, and the show does not acknowledge the inherent silliness of this for a moment.

As such, the punchline of Poison is the final verse, which is a tour de force of Blake Roman’s acting skill. Everything cuts away and you get the emotional centre of the entire song. It’s like the dick joke you can see coming, but instead of making you laugh, it destroys you.

This is how the final scream in All You Wanna Do works. The song part of the musical Six, which I hope to cover on this blog at some point and follows the breaking down of Katherine Howard. She is seeking a kinship without any preconceptions, but everyone around her views her as nothing more than a vehicle for sex.

At the end of the song, she screams out into the stage:

"Bite my lip and pull my hair as you tell me I'm the fairest of the fair."

Six is a tragedy that has already happened. The characters know their fates, but the audience gets to learn them in real time, and is powerless but to watch with joy that turns rapidly into horror.

In this case, Howard hasn't been allowed to complain. She's been something pretty for people to look upon, and she has to be happy, right? She's married to the king. But she isn't, because nobody has at any point asked what it is that she wants.

So, she screams, letting all that rage and frustration out, letting the audience know how she really feels, and displaying her complete vulnerability in the face of history, and then she is gone, and there is nothing you can do about it.

Poison also does this with each chorus. There are mini punchlines, mini beats that make you react and keep you interested.

“What’s the worst part of this hell? I can only blame myself.”

This forms a bridge to the chorus, drawing you back like an arrow in a bowstring to send you rocketing forwards into an aggressively upbeat flurry of music. The same thing happens later on in the song.

“So far beyond difficult, To resist another gulp.”

This is use of the titular metaphor, but its also ascribing blame. Angel has been abused and sexually assaulted by Valentino, and this is the song about how he has internalised that. Namely, through condemning himself.

There are two things to note here, and I think the series disagrees with Angel on both accounts.

First up, there is the importance of proportionality. Falling for someone with more red flags than a beach in shark season wasn’t a good decision, I think we can all agree on that, but it doesn’t condemn someone to abuse.

Especially since this is the internet for Pete's sake. You only have to imply that a character is attractive, and you will have a collection of people who will defend their every move. Part of this is the "I can fix him" mentality and the fact that fictional characters aren't real, but still. Come on.

Second up, is Angel really to blame? More to blame than, say, Valentino? The victim is blaming himself for his victimhood, in order to deflect from the person who has put himself in that situation.

Episode four has one scene in it that is both my favourite and my least favourite, the one in which Charlie sets fire to the set.

This was a scene that made me reflect on the difference between something being good craft and something being enjoyable, as Valentino’s switch in tone when moving between Angel and Charlie is so viscerally uncomfortable that it made me pause the episode to sit back and take it in. It’s intentionally jarring, and it's not trying to present this character as benevolent.

What it is trying to do is present Valentino as seductive, someone who has two modes that he can switch between. Angel fell for the nice Valentino who got the gifts and was kind and charming and was blindsided by the more aggressive version of this character.

In other words, the highs were what he was drawn in by, the lows caught him off guard. Valentino is like a drug.

This truly is the opposite of Alice Cooper’s song. Where that personified the drug to give it agency, Angel dehumanises Valentino to place the agency on himself and take the blame.

“Because I know you’re poison, you’re feeding me poison. Addicted to this feeling I can’t help but swallow up your poison. I made my choice and every night I’m living like there’s no tomorrow.”

If we focus on the line I put in bold, there’s some similarity to another song, previously in the musical.

“Hell is forever, whether you like it or not. Had their chance to behave better now they boil in a pot”

The idea that choices are final and that everyone gets one chance that they must then commit to is a key antagonistic force in the series. The show is about hope, and the desire for things to get better, but Heaven and Angel say that if you make a decision, the rest of your life must be dedicated to the follow up of that.

If you got into a bad relationship, sucks to suck, you’re stuck there. If you got into a bind and had to do dark things to stay alive, sorry, no redoes.

There's a word for this: "Damnation".

Committing to the bit here is making the bit your entire deal. The theme is the dichotomy between change and stagnation, and every source of conflict comes from that one concept. It’s milking the joke for all its worth, but again, repurposed.

Although, there is one other advantage that comedians have in storytelling, an advantage I like to call the “What’s My Mother’s Name?” Moment.

Sam Riegel is a voice actor and a regular cast member on Critical Role. He is famous for being incredibly funny, but also for his relationship with humour. Several times across the series’ three campaigns, it has become clear that Riegel was being fully serious, and neither the audience not the cast saw it coming until far too late.

There’s an obvious example here but let’s get topical and talk about the latest episode of the series, as of writing this.

“He had a perspective and a goal and he laid it out very clearly. He wanted to get his family back and assume power. He did not set out to kill a city, to destroy a city. He wanted to get back with his family. The others prevented him. He gave them a choice to sit down at a table and they said, ‘No, we'd rather kill a city.’”

Riegel is playing Braius Doomseed, a minotaur champion of an evil deity, and in episode 102, there is a discussion of what has gone before. Braius starts to make a case for one of the villainous deities, and the rest of the cast assumes he’s just joking and committing to the bit. Instead, Reigel commits to the bit so thoroughly that he bypasses humour and plays it straight. This is someone genuinely making a case for the lord of the hells.

The question isn’t about when Reigel started beings serious because he’s always been that. The question, is “when did he stop being funny?”

Hazbin Hotel does this with Poison, and it causes the audience to reflect on what has gone before. All of Angels’s actions up to this point have now been recontextualised, and it's far too late to do anything about it. Angel has always been serious, the show has always been aware of this character as a damaged person, but now the lighting is different, and you aren’t shielded by the joke.

The punchline is the commitment to the bit.

Final Thoughts

I’ve seen a lot of praise online for this song, and while I agree that this song’s grip on you is unbreakable, I think that it gets outdone by the very next number.

I also want to point out why, in my opinion, episode four is the best in the series.

The show has a pacing problem, it’s in a hurry to tell its story because it’s had artificial constraints put upon it. But Masquerade takes its time and gives you a story without compromises and without outside input. In my eyes, this is a flawless episode of television.

Next week, we will stick with the episode, and look at Loser Baby, and how hope becomes triumph. Stick around if that interests you.

Previous - Next

[familyagrestefanblog]

Throwing a disclaimer out because I think it's time I say it again just to be sure:

Me having fallen so much out of love with Marinette by now isn't because I hate that her side of the conflicts was given more weight than Adrien's or that I "don't understand that she's the main character"

My problem lies in HYPOCRISY. Marinette's writing ever since season 4 has been going out of its way to be as hypocritical as possible in basically every aspect of the story, but especially the love square, and then it was sold as "justified and totally morally sound feminism" just because it's a girl doing it.

The amount of harmful messages Maribug was retooled into teaching as "empowerment" without any genuine accountability on her part - beside some vagueness sometimes that stops meaning anything the next moment it actually matters - are insane and inherently on child abuse victims expense to the point where I don't actually trust alot of Marinette stans opinions on child abuse and leadership anymore which is the worst thing Marinette's character could have been made to cause.

I hate that sexist HYPOCRISY was declared EMPOWERING as long as the girl benefits from it. I stand under no obligation to support a harmfully hypocritical main character of a female empowerment kids cartoon, and if you think I do, learn what actual feminism is.

I repeat: my problem lies in the deeply interwoven and glorified hypocrisy

NOT in the fact that Marinette's side of the narrative was covered at all.

I was and AM perfectly fine and supportive of that, but what I don't support is the show ever since season 4 hardcore retooling the narrative into ONLY Marinette's side and benefit mattering and in some of the worst and most hypocritical ways possible to the point where Marinette never even made a single effort in finding Hawkmoth to actually DO HER JOB and take a fraction of interest in the man underneath his mask because that wouldn't have been about HERSELF.

Years ago, 2x01 "The collector" promised me a main character who will actually show initiative to end the war in more regards than herself first and foremost becoming the Queen of the world. I signed up for Marinette as main character who will actually SAVE Gabriel's victims with her compassion and drive to help people

I didn't get that beyond the most surface level way possible because Marinette and the narrative were written to prioritizing her being entirely in control of everything, girlbossing her love interest into being her submissive care taker for which she hardly took any accountability for, and looking cool hitting stuff including her love interest and the remains of her Villain's wife who never wanted this, but Marinette threw a fucking LIFT on her body to get a strategic advantage over Gabriel by taking advantage of Gabriel's remaining humanity and love for the very woman at the core of all this.

Emilie, who was fridged and silenced beyond anything resembling to feminism, but it HAD to happen because Emilie's story isn't about Marinette and the narrative had to make sure Marinette will be celebrated "as such a cool girlboss!" for throwing a fucking LIFT on the remains of the villain's loved one while she simultaneously failed Emilie's son - Marinette's own "partner" - so MUCH as partner and leader that he had literally no way to possibly make it out of this partnership because Marinette teached Chat Noir that she's all that matters, he gets no support, help, resources, or a voice when it isn't to her benefit.

When the chips are down, he has to die quietly and give up his ring because Ladybug couldn't be asked to look beyond her personal experience, benefit and comfort in this "partnership" while simultaneously needing to be taken care of, as good as worshipped, and celebrated by him like a mind reader for EVERYTHING because she wasn't "ill-intentioned"

Which she is explicitly written to prioritize people understanding that about her than actually working on herself in ways that truly matter.

I once signed up for Marinette being the main hero and savior of Paris and Gabriel's victims, but all I got is glorified hypocrisy thats sold as "empowerment" and a worshipped girlboss main heroine who postponed doing her job so fucking much that the main villain shaped the entire in-universe world already BEFORE he won and made his wish, as well as several characters being damned and irreversibly negatively affected by his power and influence over and on them by the time Marinette was finally spoon-feed into being able to face Hawkmoth at literally 11:59 pm.

But hey, I suppose all that mattered was Marinette BENEFITTING from that to sweep her own big flaws under the rug, as well as her looking cool hitting stuff in different super hero suits to she can become the Queen of the world.

I would apologize for having thought that Marinette's hero's journey was about more than that, but that's literally nothing I have to apologize for.

[that-one-gay-from-the-gay-club]

When will parents learn to respect their kids Boundaries?

When is my mother going to learn that when I walk downstairs in my sports bra and a half open cardigan that it's not because I want her opinions on my body?

When is my mother going to learn that even though I dyed my hair, that dosent mean I want her to rake her hands through it? I don't even let my partners do that most of the time.

When When my mother going to learn that when she sneaks up behind me and does that thing that people do with their hands when they're trying to scare you, and I have headphones, that it's an impulse to turn around and punch her (it was in the leg and not very hard, she scared me)

When is my mother going to learn that going through my room and taking my medication is NOT FUCKING OK? (It was cough medication but I was actually coughing to the point where I couldn't breathe and it was hurting my lungs so much)

When will she learn that its not cool to go telling everyone when I finally try to open up to her about something?

When is she going to notice that I'm not ok and I wasn't self harming for attention when I was 11 years old ?

When is EVERYBODY ELSE going to learn that no, you don't have to forgive your family. Just because they're family dosent mean you need to love and forgive them.

Sometimes you just need to tell people to fuck off and mean it. Sometimes you have to put boundaries

Stop bleeding into the salt they throw you in after they tear you apart

[asexual-means-no-attraction]

So wait I can't be aspec because I have sex?? I don't feel romantic attraction like at all and you call that preference?? I'm sorry me not liking romance and being grossed out when it's performed on me is just as Valid and your sex repulsion. Saying Aromantic is just a preference is wild. if you are making that point then asexuality is not a sexuality either. Romance repulsion is just as valid as sexual repulsion. Like what,? Since when has aspec mean only asexual? Like why would kick aromantic allosexuals out of the aspec community. Not feeling romantic attraction is definitely not normal. it's not bad either. Please can you stop being hateful and rude to your fellow queer community. What you are saying or incredibly harmful for aromantics especially if they are not ace.

Not normal?

Asexuality is normal.

Bisexuality is normal.

Being gay/lesbian is normal.

Being straight is normal.

Our community is NOT for the abnormal. Its not for the weird and strange people of the earth. There are weird straight people with different desires for relationships. There are weird gay/bisexuals who have different things they want out of a relationship. And there are weird asexuals who want unique things in a relationship. Heck, there are bi/gay/straights who want no relationship at all-- but arent asexual because they experience attraction. Cuz its not about what you want/are comfy doing. Its just about 'who' you like.

Not liking romance is not a sexuality. Not liking sex is not a sexuality. That is in fact a preference. And sure, it'll make finding partners hard. But so will a million and one other things about a person.

And yeah, the SAM makes it so asexuality acts as a preference rather than a sexuality in it's own right. And thats why I dont like it. Asexuality is a sexuality in its own right.

And 'cant' is a strong word friend. You came onto my blog. I never once said you can't call yourself what ever. I have no right to tell someone what they can and can't call themselves regardless of how I feel. And I've never done so. I won't tell you what to ID as. You asked for my opinion and I gave it. I did not say what you are allowed to do. I just said my beliefs. Me stating them on my personal blog is not shoving it down your throat.

And please. If we're taking about hate. Can you not think of our community as the club for the 'weirdos.' And not associate sexuality as the act of 'sex' itself. We get enough of that already without our own community pushing that idea. Odd balls are in every group. We are coming together due to our natural attraction-- that we cannot help and is absolutely normal. The only weird things would be personality or what someone wants in a relationship. Which exist outside a sexuality.

Anymore responses will likely be ignored unless they're actual conversation and not both of us just talking to a brick wall.

[rentheknightgale]

Thoughts on an ana/mia discord server?

If one already exists hmu. But I am also willing to make my own.

heres what my main rules would look like:

If you don't already have an 3d then don't join looking to get one. This isnt a place to get/start an ed but a place for people who already have it to talk. No coaches. This is for safety. Its okay to motivate people but no ana coaches as they are always no good. No fatphobia. I understand that fatphobia is woven into the fabric of 3ds but its still very harmful to decide that other people should change because of your opinions. This also means no f4tsp0, as it is inherently fatphobic. Keep your 3d to yourself, dont force it on anyone else. (this rule will be STRICT) Body checks are okay as long as they are in the dedicated channel and tw are put for si/sh. Also very little clothing is okay but no s3xualizing clothes or things that are meant to make you look s3xy. Also no br3ast or groin. Obviously. No substance talk. No no, nope. Talking about what meds you take is fine or whatever, but no promotion of alcohol, illegal dr-gs, vaping, grass or tobacco. Also no other forms of substance abuse, no matter how obscure. I am well versed enough to know the slick things and I know just how dangerous and horrible these kinds of things can get and while I can't stop you from doing it, I refuse to allow its influence to be spread. No homophobia, transphobia, ableism, racism, ect. I am also VERY well versed in minorities of all kinds and for these kinds of things its a one strike and you're out. If you say something and it comes off wrong then it will be a warning, but ignorance or hate will be immediately deleted. This would be a 17+ server strictly. oh, you're 16 and your birthday is in two months, nope. Got to wait. I wont ask for any personal info to prove age or anything of the sort, but If in some way I find out you are underage then you will be banned. NO CREEPS!!! I know redflags for gr00mers, and creeps. I will be on the look out. I have had other discord servers in the past where I had to put close friends on blast for creepy shit. I do not care if someone in the server is my best friend, if they are being a creep to you, you can tell me and I will take care of it. I wont shame you, or tell anyone who said something. I have been a victim too and had to go to court. I didn't get justice, I will not cause that kind of pain on even the smallest level to go without justice.

The last one is not even just for my discord server, but in general. If you are going through something my dms are open. Idc what the situation is, if you think you deserved it, if you are a boy, if they were a girl, if they were younger to you, if it was your partner. It doesnt matter to me. I'm here to listen, or to back you up if you want.

There would be other smaller rules, but these are the main ones. If theres some sort of issue with discord and why theres a reason people dont do this then also let me know pls. Also, if there are any other rules I should add, or questions put it in the notes or in my ask box and I'll answer!

Also, this would have a pretty thick authentication system. I hope I can figure it out. But I'm thinking some sort of level system where the more you are active the more access to the server you get. This will help with any raids or creeps. You would need to have quite a few days of talking in the main chat to get access to more and more channels. And the more sensitive ones (like body checking and vent) would be the kinds where you need to be talking daily for a week to get type thing. It sucks but I really need to weed out the minors, creeps, people who dont have 3ds and the like.

[leptonyx-constellate]

"dni if you're pro-persecutor! abuse is NOT WELCOME!" how about you shut the fuck up forever, actually.

i, Twitch, am a persecutor-protector. i keep Oakley safe because that is my job. i am highly aggressive towards others because Oakley is deeply non-confrontational. that includes towards other headmates, because Oakley has been hurt too many fucking times by assholes who insist on reading its actions in the worst light possible--within our own collective and within our ex partner system. do i go too far sometimes? you may think so, but i don't take risks when it comes to Oakley's safety. it's the center of my world, i am one of its masks and it is my job to make sure it is happy and well, and for fucks' sake, i will not let anyone hurt it.

Max is a persecutor/avenger. she holds onto the persecutor label because that's what she was with her old system. she is aggressive and mean and catty, but she is, at least marginally, protective of us. not in a "protector" way necessarily, she just has more care for us than she did her old system. ey have promised that if ey ever run into eir old system in the future, ey're going to rip them a new one after how they treated us. she is one of my best friends.

"persecutor" does not fucking mean evil. a headmate being a persecutor does not give you a pass to treat them like shit--and that includes forcing us into "recovery". our role does not give you a pass to take away our autonomy, or to assume we're fucking abusive.

me and Max (and the other persecutors in our collective) are relatively lucky. our collective does not treat us like ticking time bombs. the word "persecutor" is not a moral judgment; it's a self-applied identity label tied to certain behaviors and attitudes. we are allowed to do what we feel is needed within reason, and our collective is willing to compromise with us and lets us be people. you'd think this would be basic courtesy, but fucking apparently, so many people hold the opinion that persecutors are Monsters who need to Repent From Their Sins, and if we aren't striving for "recovery", then we deserve to have our autonomy taken from us in the form of being locked up and harmed ourselves. being treated with decency should not be a fucking reward for forced recovery, for being made to perform "goodness" against our own sense of safety and selfhood.

you don't have to accept abuse, but that goes both ways. and i hope every persecutor in the world has a chance to find peace and safety, whether it's along with or in spite of the rest of their system.

[the-bonfires-ember]

ive been thinking about that thing people say about mental illness. yknow, 'its not a part of your personality' 'dont make it your identity' etc

but when you have a personality disorder, that doesnt really make sense anymore.

which makes my feelings on cluster b pride flags a little conflicted. coz, sure, it is fundamentally a part of your personality and certainly shapes your identity, but something about pride flags has always been off to me. perhaps especially as a person with aspd.

now, sure, on the one hand i get it. theres something appealing about having that kind of validation that you arent alone, especially when you are constantly masking and shifting who you are to fit the situation best.

we might have antisocial personality disorder but we are still, at our core, social creatures. we still desire community, we're just also afraid of it.

so yeah, a banner of community and others 'like us' seems fair enough, right?

BUT

theres still something... off to me about it. what it was, exactly, only came to me after a discussion with my partner about DID and PluralKit - yeah i know, im diving into plural drama now, lfg i guess

they showed me an infographic about the process of DID recovery which showed the progression from very disconnected and separated identities to a more blended 'final fusion' (a term they take issue with but thats a different story). i said that PluralKit must be confusing for people on the later ends of the spectrum they were showing me because, at that point, how do you tell who is blending with who? when the lines are blurry, how do you know who to tag yourself as? it seemed like an inhibitor to recovery if you were constantly cutting yourselves off from each other. (this is not me saying anything one way or the other about plurals and recovery in DID or whatever the fuck else, im just using this as an example. stfu i dont care about your opinions on any of this so dont waste your breath)

i think my feelings on aspd flags is somewhat similar. coz i mean, they are pride flags, right? and i think if you are taking pride in being aspd then you are far more likely to lean into your symptoms, and i think thats a slippery slope to go down and has just a very 'anti-recovery' vibe, if you know what i mean.

with that all said, i also very much think that if you dont want to recover, you dont have to. i dont think you can force anyone to recover and i dont think you should even try to. recovery is fucking shit and its hard and if you arent ready for it, you are just going to hurt whoever you are trying to make recover.

but i also think that you can have that opinion, whilst also being a voice for recovery, and be against 'anti-recovery' thinking.

because look, like it or not aspd is a fucking disorder. and at some point that becomes unhelpful or it wouldnt be a disorder. symptoms of aspd are debilitating and pretending otherwise that helps nobody. especially with all the 'all pwASPD are evil' scum out there.

so yes, i think the pride flags are... unhelpful at best and harmful at worst. but what about the other stuff? the creatures alla tbh creature and the plushiedreadful rabbit? (i think both of those designs suck btw but thats not the point)

idk those feel like they are in a different category. theres not really a sense of pride in those, more a sense of comfort. again, community, but also a sort of softness(??) that the pride flag things seem to miss - especially when they are like 'vampire aspd' or 'evil aspd' or any of the other bullshit things ive seen out there. i guess they are also just way more 'mental illness' coded than pride flags are.

pride flags have always been a 'we're here and theres nothing wrong with us' kind of thing. but the creatures and the bears are more lighthearted and sort of making fun of the conditions a little bit. highlighting symptoms and coping mechanisms. just look at the imocreature - specifically the worm one which is my favourite - and the way its able to be so pathetic looking and cute. its not meant to be cool or badass or whatever else, its just a lil guy that gets sad without supply.

which, yknow, relatable.

[kavehnanginto]

i was entirely wrong about you…. part 1

synopsis: you realize your feelings after you brutally rejected and insulted him. regret soon followed you and you realized that it was too late, the feelings of love sprouted but you just had to ruin it. you never really thought of the fact that he was still so in-love with you, doing everything, for you to feel the same

pairings: alhaitham, cyno x gn!reader

references to pride and prejudice, bit of fluff jk, angst, its a happy ending spoiler alert unless you don’t want me to, i did not get sleep, proof read is for the weak just fix the grammar and spelling in ur mind, alhaitham is a bitch, cyno is a bitch, reader is a bitch

part two

ALHAITHAM

You have lots of opinion about the acting grand sage.

First of all, he did nothing but insult and ignore you when you were partnered up with him in his Akademiya days and secondly he was your ex-crush. Sure, blessed with good-looks and intelligence he was a catch but his pride was a big issue. The way he disregarded your opinions, made sure he got his way and belittled you. All these were from the past.

But was it really your fault, when never once did he apologize?

Now, its just silent stares and awkward conversations. You bet he didn’t even know who you were but still you find him staring at you in meetings. Maybe it was because he found you outfit horrendous. He spoke little in your presence, preferring to be on his own. Book and chair. Unlike before, he dare not speak negatively about you, often times forcing a compliment here and there. But you never forgot his words, and when you mentioned it he told you don’t fret over the past.

Your self esteem shattered because of your past with him. You cried because the guy you liked would rather die than team up with you. Liked. You were not to be harassed by fate again over a man who eats his own reflection.

“I love you.”

Your night never really ended with Alhaitham confessing his feelings for you. In fact, even when you did have a crush for him you never really and truly expected that he… Alhaitham was now at your door saying this.

It was raining. You didn’t know why you knew he hated it. But it added to your emotions all the same. He was panting, you didn’t need to come close to feel his beating heart. But even with this display of vulnerability that you so desperately wanted a while back.

Your pride got hurt, and its your dream to hurt his too.

“A while back, I would have been ecstatic to hear this from you,” you started. “But know I have realized your character acting grand sage. And I’m sorry if I hurt you, believe me I did not mean it. I also apologize the disdain in my voice when I first spoke to you at our eventful reunion. Believe me I meant no harm.”

You see a furrow on this eyebrows. He was for sure thinking it was a yes. He knew how much you clinged to him back then. Then.

“Are you rejecting me?” It was confusion rather than regret. You expected him to be regret what he did now that it was the reason why you stopped all feelings for this man.

“I believe that we can change Alhaitham. I was a funny child when I first met you, always on your side for approval and validation. I have changed, and I know you hardly didn’t.” you gave a small smile. “I’m sorry for you coming all this way, in this terrible weather and all—“

“So are you?” There was more force in his tone. Maybe he wanted this to get over with, huh?

“Yes!” you snapped. “You thought of me so little you think that the guy that insulted my intelligence, my presence and my dreams was the man I want to be with? I'm so sorry that I reject you, but how can I accept and like someone who never cared about anyone except for himself, someone like you ?”

Thunderstorms soon followed. You stared into his eyes with hatred, with what you wanted to say all this time. You looked down on him, as there was no way you’ll let him climb the stairs to your home. What you did not expect was the furrow on his brow was replaced with a wide gaze.

“So that’s what you think of me.” He looked down, he was wet and you were too. The rain felt like a comfort to him at this point. “I’m sorry for what crime I have committed, and for also be so daring to be in your presence.”

And there you last saw him again. The rain which at first was so loud, now unheard.

You wept. It was grains of tears, falling after another. You wanted this, right? This was your revenge. But though your ego satisfied, the tight feeling in your heart told a different tale. You did the right thing? Or did you just delude yourself by knowing that deep inside. He was right.

The tales of that day plagued your mind, it was like a ghost who dare not let go of you.

It was the end of work and he gave a letter. You just hoped things will get better and you will once again see the right path.

“Dear y/n,

When I first met you I hated you. It was because of your liberal and sunshine views about the world. Your optimistic mindset of everything yet still being pessimistic about yourself. That about you made everything you do annoying to me. How you faked a smile. How you were always there. I hated it. So when you left I never really knew why I hated it even more.

You didn’t have child like fantasies in the world, I was wrong. I grew to love this world, behind the books I read and novels on imaginary land. There was this world, so complex and unknown, and when I see every flower and every breathtaking view I immediately thought of you. And when I met you again when I became Scribe I fell. It was not even weeks, but I was already so besotted with your presence I can’t even remember how or why.

There is no excuse for your disdainful hatred towards me. I admit I deserve it fully. But let me thank you for everything. For showing me the beauty of everything, and for giving me the biggest prize to be with your presence even if it was for a short while. It was a pleasure nonetheless and I hope one day you grew to forgive me, even if you never love me back.

Wishing for your health and happiness.

With love,

Alhaitham.”

CYNO

The general Mahamatra was once your best friend. It was childhood, it never was permanent. In your early teens both of you drifted apart. It was always meant to be. He was just too good for you and you know that, even now. What you didn’t know was that he didn’t even acknowledge you existed. Long gone the cute boy who tied your shoelaces and played pirates with. It was replaced by the popular kid who banished your existence in his mind. It continued like that for the next 6 years and then gave up.

About time, he might have said.

Your happiness and piece of mind was more important than your friendship. So when you were paired up with Cyno, you were colder than he is. He was more friendly than before, he spoke with genuine intentions and he always valued your opinion. You were starting to like him not until you asked him of the past and he mentioned how nobody was there for him. It was vulnerable for him…

…. but you were never that angry at anyone your entire life

You spent hours in your room just to know he ignored you back then. How you tried everything to get his attention. You could’ve been there and he just didn’t care. Maybe he wanted that of superior presence and not you? Was that it. At that moment, you decided he was still the same. The bare minimum of talking to you and acknowledging you did not impress you anymore.

In fact, you hated it.

“I’ve grown to like you these past few weeks. Can I talk you on a date perhaps.”

It was late at night and you guys are creating a plan to enter the ruin. Almost done, you pack your things and ready for a new day not until he said that.

“How so?” Your reply was one of judgement., he recognizes it fully.

“Well for starters I’ve known you for a while. Your laugh that you showed, although not very often it was a pleasure to see, how your lips curved as you bite your bottom lip. How your eyes glisten when you see dood that you like and how eyes gaze in the room when you hear a nostalgic sound.” He’s serious. Dead serious.

You stared to his soul, just as he did to you.

“Instead of staring, please just answer—”

“…”

“No.”

He was silent than ever before. “Humor me, why?”

The room was now that of crickets and the faint sound of footsteps. You were about to exit the place if not for this confession you never wanted nor dreamed, nor even thought of happening.

“What do you mean why?” You stepped closer to him. His then serious look was replaced of an observing look, curious of what you have to say. “Do you remember me?”

“I do, we were childhood friends—”

“After that! After silly princesses and pirates did you know what happen?”

He knew about this.

“We drifted apart—”

Another step. But he didn’t back away. He wanted you closer.

“YOU drifted apart!” you pointed at him. “And you have the audacity to tell me that nobody was your side. I WAS there! And I could’ve been there if you just noticed my presence and let me be in your life like I once was—”

“Then you should’ve told me!” he argued.

“Then maybe you should’ve cared!” A pause. It felt good to say that after all this time. But at the same time you wonder what this means.

And then you grew distant at him and went to the door to open.

“And now you delude yourself to take me on dates and be with me. Maybe you should have thought about that years ago when I did everything to be with your side. Maybe you have thought to apologize for what you did instead of coming back when you want.” You closed the door and let yourself feel the night wind. You didn’t know why you cared so much for a guy like that. But you wonder if he changed or you did. Maybe he had a perspective you were so blind in seeing.

That morning was eventful. You were late to the meeting with Cyno and you need to get over everything about last night. You were greeted by an empty room and in your desk a letter was to be seen. In it was beautiful handwriting, one that your familiar with

“Y/n,

You were right I ignored you back then. It was intentional, it was true. You were all the talk by males and females alike. You made me sound like a popular kid. But I didn’t even know how to pop corn. Did that make you laugh?”

No it did not, but it made the atmosphere more bright than it should’ve been.

“I liked you since childhood. And you were just so unreachable in highschool, I didn’t even know why you wanted to befriend me. A boy who nobody liked. Who was too aloof and distant for his own good. That’s the reason. It is so unbelievably useless and worthless to you. I know. But I never meant for this letter to change your opinion of me, rather I wanted to mend what you thought it was in your mind. As for what I said, it was a great offense to you. I meant that nobody was there and I liked it that way. I would rather carry my burdens alone and when I said it to you I wanted you to know of my state in that past. Maybe a way of you understanding me more. I guess it had an opposite effect.

I know how disgusting I am to you so I’m pulling myself in our investigation. But collected a good sum of data now placed in your desk. I hope it will prove use. When you’re in the ruins please let someone accompany you. Ask that of Tighnari and I am sure he will. I hope I explained my side to you and even if it means not to talk to you. I’m glad I confessed to you last night.

Apologies and a thank you,

Cyno.”

Proof reading is for the weak anyways that is all. I am not a lore player so idk if this is right but yeah thank you for reading

[redheadloverr]

sub vs dom headcanons

basically just whether i think theyre the dom or sub! (entirely sfw)

gn!reader x anemo boys!

heizou

a dom but in possibly the worst - best way ever

he’s the type to brag to everyone that he is the dom but no one believes him, everyone thinks youre the dom but he gets his way every single time.

hes a bit stubborn so he takes things like this almost like a competition, he has to prove to you, and the world, that he is in fact a dom. it gets tiring at times but you laugh at it.

its an interesting dynamic, no one believes he’s the dom but as some would say “he has you wrapped around his fingers” and you honestly dont mind. hes sweet and compassionate when he needs to be, serious and stern when he needs to be as well.

although you are his special person; and trust me you are, sometimes he’ll do or say things that make you two seem like mere friends but you know he doesnt mean them that way. he looks out for you. he knows you dont need him to but hes happy to do it anyways.

at the end of the day, you know what type of partner you’re coming home to. he may be a bit overprotective and overbearing at times but thats what you love about him.

kazuha

soft dom. 100%.

kazuha’s the type of dom to let you go around telling people you’re the dom and people would believe it because of how soft spoken he is and how easy he is to give in to your request.

kazuha practically created the “princess treatment”. he would never disrespect you, never raise his voice at you, never even touch you unless you told him it was okay / you wanted him to. he respects you and your personal space as well as your personal opinions, ideals, morals, so on and so fourth.

kazuha does have a downside tho, he never knows how to necessarily bring up his own emotions or opinions. kazuha is a closed book, his book hasnt been opened for years its practically full of dust. you try your best to mkae him open up and he does! you know him better than anyone else but even then he still keeps his secrets.

kazuha is absolutely terrified or harming you in any way shape or form. he goes out of his way to protect you from stuff you couldnt even possibly think of. you have his full attention and admiration, though you wish he’d pay attention to you when you’d tell him he needs to focus on himself and what he wants.

he typically says “dont worry about my feelings.” or “this isnt about my feelings.” on the rare occasions you two do have disagreements.

scaramouche

100% a sub. a bratty sub.

hes the type of sub to be such a brat at times you genuinely just want to throw them in the lake and leave them there. you don’t obviously but he gets on your nerves lol.

if people asked who wore the pants he’d say it was a mix of the two of you, though you know its all bs.

scara is like a little kid having a temper tantrum because he couldnt get ice cream for dinner. if he doesnt get his way hes pouty and moody until you somehow “make it up to him” with basically anything

hes moody and a lot of times has mood swings every five seconds, he really is like a kid. he’s fussy and whiny but you know at the end of the day you love him and he loves you, you two would never want your dynamic to be shared with someone else nor lose this dynamic.

venti

venti is a bit of a wild card! he’s definitely a switch

i feel like venti is confident in certain aspects of the relationship and with other aspects he just lets you take control if youre more confident.

i feel like a relationship with venti would for sure be 50/50, probably the most balanced relationship but a bit of a hectic and chaotic one to be sure.

venti wouldnt necessarily know how to answer someone if they asked who wears the pants, hed probably say you just to throw them for a loop but you both know youre equals in this relationship.

xiao

definitely a sub but behind closed doors.

he pretends to be hard on the outside but really all he wants is to be the little spoon and be pampered with love and affection!

he secretly loves when you take the initiative; whether it be planning dates, holding hands out in public, showing PDA, ect.

he’s definitely the type to have acted like a “badass” or a “bully” in highschool but in reality he just wanted a hug and for someone to tell him theyre proud of him.

he has absolutely no mercy for anyone who even attempts to hurt you, however. youre the only one who has and is able to see his soft side.

he shows you off to his friends and worships the ground you walk on, it doesnt bother you one bit that he pretends to wear the pants in the relationship to his friends and fellow acquaintances.