#i mean hell this is the guy who wanted a little girl to be executed

[merciganimard]

If there's one major gripe I have about episode 1, it is the changes they made to Morgan. In the manga he terrorized the village and even his own people were scared of him and against his actions. OPLA does at least show he's a self-centered despot (all those huge portraits of himself...), but that's not enough in my opinion.

[dovkss]

Dumb Bitch

word count: 5.8k

summary: after you pine after him for so long with no luck, Katsuki finally decides to take you as his; thanks to his best friend.

warning: 18+; mean dom! katsuki; dirty talk (ish); oral (m receiving); rough sex; spitting; choking; breath play; degradation; hair pulling; manipulation; dacryphilia; edging; size kink; misogyny; yandere tendencies; kinda ooc, I was having a lot of fun with this one; kinda dubcon-ish?, reader is drunk for the most part; katsuki is an ass; poor eijiro won’t take no for an answer and ends up getting fucked over bc of it; katsuki and ei are basically frenemies

all characters are aged up !!

a/n: my first published fic on this blog omg !! sorry for any mistakes or anything, I kinda rushed this but I enjoyed making this, hope you enjoy reading it :)

Kirishima stood in the middle of his room with his phone in his hand as a mischievous grin tugged at the corners of his lips. He knew of your little crush on his best friend and he couldn’t help but want to play cupid. He had the perfect plan, all he needed to do now was execute it. Sure, he knew Bakugou's disdain for you ran deep, but he also couldn't shake off the nagging feeling that there could be something more.

Dialing your number, he chuckled to himself, imagining the reaction he’d get out of you. It wasn't long before the ringback tone was cut off by the call connecting. Immediately you greeted him with a voice filled with joy, as usual.

“Hi, Kiri!” you greeted.

“Hey hey! How’s it going?” he asked.

You hummed in delight. He heard tiny giggles in the background. “Great,” you exclaimed. “The girls and I are having a sleepover right now… if you wanna talk to Mina, she’s right here- fuck!”

From the sound of it, you were hit as a sign to shut up. Kirishima chuckled at your guys’ antics. “Well, this is easy enough knowing you’re all in one place! I’m throwing a little get-together this weekend, I want you all to be there!”

It got a little quiet on the other end of the line, the only thing being heard is some shuffling and slight whispers.

“Hmm, who’s all gonna be there?” you asked curiously.

Kirishima smiled. “He’s gonna be there.”

He could almost hear the collective gasp that came from you and your friends. Then it went dead silent. You muted yourself. The redhead imagined your guys’ squeals.

You cleared your throat, going back to trying to act normal, and unmuted yourself. “Count us in, Kiri!” you exclaimed. “We wouldn’t miss it for the world!”

Everything was going to plan. You and he said your goodbyes before the call ended. Kirishima couldn’t help but wear a satisfied grin. He knew he had sparked a glimmer of hope within you. The idea of igniting a connection between you and Bakugou excited him. But it was soon dampened when Bakugou stormed into the room with a couple of cans of soda in his hands.

“What the hell was that about?” he asked.

Kirishima knew he couldn’t lie to him. Bakugou knows when he lies. Bakugou set the sodas on the wood floor and grabbed two cans. He tossed one to his friend and opened up his own. He sat on Kirishima’s bed, facing him, awaiting an answer.

Kirishima popped his soda open and took a sip. The room was filled with tense silence, even if it was for only a moment. “I just invited some last-minute people to the party,” he said.

True.

Bakugou’s vermillion eyes narrowed. His intense gaze radiated intense annoyance. “Who?” he questioned some more.

Kirishima winced playfully at Bakugou’s usual harsh response. He would rather intend to pique the ash blonde’s curiosity rather than ignite his ire.

"Don't worry about it, bro. We'll see everybody there!"

For the first time, Bakugou wanted to be wrong. He shook his head in disapproval before chugging down some more of his soda. "You're a fucking idiot, Kirishima. I thought you knew better than to invite her."

Kirishima squinted at Bakugou. "I get that you don't like her, but you're also being way too quick to judge. Get to know her a little better, she isn't who you think she is."

Bakugou scoffed, his voice filled with disbelief. "You think I would waste my time on someone like her? You should know me better than that."

"I just think that maybe-"

"That fucking shallow, attention-seeking whore. I have no interest in girls like her."

Kirishima's expression softened, his voice gentle but firm. "Not cool, man. She's still my friend," he started, "and I think you watch too many movies. Not every girl that cares about how they look on the outside is some dumb bitch."

Bakugou's scowl deepened, frustration etched on his face. "I don't need you playing matchmaker, Kirishima. I can take care of myself."

Kirishima sighed and raised his hands in defeat. "Fine! I'll let it go!" He then offered a small smile to defuse the tension. "Let's focus on getting this shit ready. We need to go out and buy some cups and food and... whatever else I can't think of on the spot right now!"

Bakugou grumbled in agreement. "Whatever. Let's get this shit over with."

Your shoes clicked softly against the polished floor of the library as you anxiously scanned the aisles of the bookshelves. You were searching for Kirishima and you were in a bit of a rush.

Earlier that morning while you were packing your purse, you realized your beloved wallet, adorned with sparkling rhinestones, wasn't on your vanity. You would never dare forget it; you relied on it because it had every card you could think of in there. And some backup cash.

You rummaged through other bags and drawers, panic rising within you. It was one of your most treasured possessions, something your mother gave you as a gift before you left for college. You desperately needed that wallet, especially now, with an important event just hours away.

Realization struck you like a bolt of lightning. You remembered opening it to pay the pizza delivery man at Kirishima's house the previous day when you were studying with him and the girls. You must've left it behind. You were so stupid!

With a sigh of frustration, you dialed Kirishima's number from your backup flip phone since your main phone was dead. Your fingers trembled lightly as you held it up to your ear, you hoped beyond hope that he had seen it. You didn't expect him to pick up because he wouldn't possibly recognize the number but he did.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Kiri! Hi, how are you? Good? That's great," you greeted eagerly, "um, do you by any chance know if I left my wallet at your place?" You rocked back and forth as you shoved your purse into the front seat of your car, putting your key into the ignition.

There was a brief pause on the other end of the line. "Oh, that's yours? The one with a bunch of glitter… crap on it? Yeah, I have it on me right now actually." he said.

You let out a sigh of relief and smiled. "Great, can I pick it up from your right now? I'm kind of in a hurry..."

He chuckled. "Of course! I'll be on campus for a couple more hours, just swing by the library."

With a renewed sense of purpose, you drove to campus. It took you way longer than usual due to traffic, but you made it nonetheless.

You made it to the library and began scanning the room, looking for your friend. The scent of old books filled the air, and the hushed whispers of students studying added an aura of calmness.

You spotted Kirishima in a corner, engrossed in a thick textbook, writing down notes as well, and you made your way toward him. As you approached, your eyes inadvertently fell upon a figure sitting next to him doing the same.

A slightly taller man with spiky blonde hair. You could tell by the way he sat, he was undeniably arrogant. Katsuki Bakugou.

Your heart skipped a beat and a nervous flutter ran through you. You'd heard rumors of his fiery personality. His ability to put anyone who dared to cross his path in their place. You were very curious about him.

"Kiri!" you chirped, flashing a bright smile.

Kirishima looked up from his book and returned the kind gesture. He put his finger up to his lips, reminding you that they were still in a library. You quietly apologized and laughed at yourself.

"It's in my bag, hold on," he whispered. He picked up his backpack from the floor next to him, unzipping it to go through the contents inside.

Your gaze wandered across the library. You tried your best to not look at Bakugou. It was hard not to, though, he was very handsome. Finally, you gave in and turned your attention to him.

You offered a tentative smile. "Hi there! I don't think we've met before."

Bakugou's piercing gaze met yours. He was unimpressed and regarded you as if your presence irritated him. Unbeknownst to you, it did.

Your smile faltered for a moment, but you refused to let his cold demeanor deter you. "I'm a friend of Kirishima's-"

"I know who you are," he responded curtly, his tone laced with thinly veiled contempt.

You felt your cheeks heat up. His voice was so intimidating and so attractive. "Katsuki Bakugou, right? I've heard a lot about you."

His dirty look became more prominent. "Yeah, I've heard enough about you too."

Your heart sank a little at his words. What did he hear? You weren't aware of any rumors of you or anything, and you were kind to everyone. The dummies, weirdos, everyone!

Kirishima chimed in. "Be nice, man," he said as he got up with your wallet in his hand. He handed it to you and you took it from him.

"Thanks so much, Kiri," you said, a sense of relief washing over you. "You have no idea how much I rely on this thing."

He shook his head, his smile showcasing his sharp teeth. "Don’t we all!"

You nodded, your gaze fixed on your reflection in your little compact mirror. "You saved the day, yet again, Kiri. I owe you one."

Ever since then, you got to know more about Bakugou thanks to Kirishima. How despite what many would believe, he's organized, and a clean freak. How much he hates being around kids yet are so great with them. Just how well he can play the drums or cook.

You thought you were subtle but it was obvious that you longed for Bakugou. It wasn't your fault he was everything you wanted in a man.

He had it all. Hardworking, determined, and confident. It was so sexy. The only problem was that he didn't seem interested at all. If anything, he seemed to despise you. To him, you were just an annoying bug that kept coming back even after being swatted at.

You wanted to win him over. When you knew you would be around him, you purposefully dressed a little sexier. Bending over to grab things even while wearing the shortest skirt that barely covered your ass and tight shirts to enhance your chest and waist.

Bakugou didn't even spare you a sympathetic glance. But you kept going. Tonight was the party and this was your last chance. If you couldn't even do as much as strike up a conversation with him, you told yourself you'd give up. You were too pretty for all this effort to be put into a man. But god, he was so hot.

Your anticipation grew as you and your friends approached Kirishima's house. The usually quiet neighborhood was transformed into a hive of activity. Cars lined the streets and the sound of laughter and music spilled from the open windows. What was meant to be a "get-together" had turned into a Project X party.

"Todoroki, could you go any damn slower?" Mina complained, her seat belt already off.

"You want me to run over these people?" he asked. You giggled, knowing his question was literal.

Mina groaned in annoyance, mumbling a small 'no.' Momo was in the front seat next to her boyfriend. "Don't listen to her, she's just a little impatient."

Finally, Todoroki got you guys to the front of the house. You were the first to get out, followed by Mina coming out behind you. Momo kissed her boyfriend. Then gave him another kiss. Then another.

Mina whined loudly. "Oh my god, Momo! He's just going to park the car! He's not leaving you, come on!"

You leave them behind in silence. As you pushed open the front door, the energy hit you like a tidal wave. Every inch of the house was packed with people, bodies swaying to the rhythm of the music. The air was thick with alcohol, weed, and the hum of people trying to converse over the loud music.

You looked around, mouth agape. You didn't even notice Mina and Momo by your side. Their eyes widened at the sight before them.

Mina leaned in closer to be heard above the noise. "This place is insane!" she exclaimed, her voice barely audible amidst the chaos.

Momo nodded in agreement. "I don't think any of us expected this. Kirishima sure knows how to throw a party."

Your eyes scanned the room in search of the boy. You caught a glimpse of his familiar red hair through the crowd and motioned for your friends to follow.

It was a challenge to move through people. Your face scrunched up in disgust as the air grew warmer. The smell finally getting to you, it was gross. Sweaty bodies rubbed against you as you made your way through. You gagged. The once cozy house had transformed into something completely unrecognizable.

Finally reaching Kirishima's side, you tapped him on the shoulder. He turned around and greeted you. It took you a moment before realizing he was shirtless. And his hair wasn't done how it usually was. It was messy and wet.

"What happened here? This was supposed to be a small get-together!" you asked, evidently in disbelief.

Kirishima laughed. "I know! It got a bit out of hand! But hey, more people, more fun, right? By the way, you look gorgeous!"

You wore a corset dress. The bodice was designed with pretty lacing and the mini skirt boasted a slit on each side. The white set was complete with thick stilettos and makeup that accentuated your natural features.

You felt your face get hot and you smiled, giving him a little twirl to show off your outfit. Kirishima dog whistled playfully and handed you a plastic red cup. You looked inside and sniffed it. Alcohol. Strong, strong alcohol.

Taking what Kirishima said, you and your friends were immersed in the lively atmosphere of the party. You all danced; twirling and spinning, laughter blending in with the melodies as you lost yourself.

With a drink in each of your guys' hands, your inhibitions further dissolved, and you found yourselves caught in a whirlwind of euphoria. You clinked cups, toasting to the night, and gulped down the concoction.

Your mind was no longer consumed by thoughts of Bakugou. The weight of your infatuation was lifted, replaced with a sense of liberation. You reveled in the present moment, finding comfort exactly where you were.

Time lost its grip and you were having fun. By the time you were worn out, your cheeks were flushed and the warmth of the alcohol coursed through your veins, the effects beginning to take a toll on your mind and body. What was just an exhilarating atmosphere now seemed overwhelming, your energy dwindling with each passing moment. Your giggles faded and were replaced with yawns that you couldn't stifle.

Kirishima approached you with a concerned look. He gently placed a hand on your head, stroking your forehead with his thumb. "You are exhausted..."

You closed your eyes for a tiny bit of rest and your ability to hold yourself up became harder and harder. Kirishima shooed away some random person off the couch to make some room for you. He helped you sit up and made sure you were comfortable before going to look for his blonde best friend.

"Bakugou!" Kirishima called out over the music. He approached the guy who sat in the corner of the party, a group of people Kirishima had never seen before was surrounding his friend.

He pushed through the small crowd. "I need your help."

Bakugou blinked at the lack of explanation. "With what?"

Kirishima nudged his head toward where you were sitting. Bakugou's eyes followed only to see your state. You looked sick and stiff, almost as if you were dead. He groaned, taking a swig of his beer. "Not my problem-"

"She's fucking tired! Just help me take her to my room so she can get some rest!" Kirishima's expression didn't waver as he pressed on. "I know we aren't exactly getting along right now, but I can't do this alone."

A mixture of irritation and reluctance flickered across Bakugou's face. His jaw clenched, the internal conflict was visible in his tense posture. After a brief moment, he finally relented.

"If she pukes on me, I'm killing both of you," he grumbled.

Together, Kirishima and Bakugou made their way through the crowded room. Bakugou downed the last of his drink before tossing it somewhere he couldn't see. He watched Kirishima pull you up from the couch, your tired form leaning on him for support and your eyes struggling to stay open.

Bakugou's mind wandered back to all the instances when you had made your attempts to catch his attention. He'd seen your efforts, dismissing them as frivolous and uninteresting. But up until recently, recognition stirred within him.

“F-fuck! Katsuki!”

The boy groaned in response. His thrusts didn’t let up even for a moment. He had her in doggy style, making sure to go deep inside her with his long strokes. His hands pressed down on her hips to keep her in place as her upper half wriggled around in pleasure.

Bakugou was turned off by her horrible acting. It was worse than a pornstar’s. At this rate, he knew he wouldn’t cum at all despite her already cumming for the first time.

The girl wasn’t ugly, she just wasn’t his type. Too vanilla for someone like him. He needed to rough someone up without worry. To grab someone by the neck and push their head into his pillow. To make someone take his big dick in full as they plead for mercy.

You were that someone.

He imagined pulling your hair and lifting you against him, your sweating bodies pressed against each other. How he’d throw you back down and pound into you from behind relentlessly. How you’d look back at him, unrecognizable with your makeup smudged and messed up, his hand rubbing along your back, up and down.

“Please… too big!” you’d bed.

He wanted badly to shake those thoughts away but he couldn’t. He closed his eyes to imagine more of what he’d do to you. Before he knew it, the thoughts set him off.

He pulled out of the girl and stroked a bit before cumming on her backside. She breathed in and out heavily, trying to catch her breath. She also began to touch herself so she can cum a second time

Bakugou didn’t help. He was busy thinking about you. Thinking about your lips, eyes, curves, and smell. You. You. You. He wanted you all for himself. But he knew your type; sweet on the outside, secretly hoping to be given a chance to play others to get what you wanted. He wasn’t going to play that game.

That night haunted him for weeks. When you came around, he went out of his way to avoid coming in contact with you. In his room, he would hear your voice ask: “What’s wrong with him?”

Kirishima would respond: “He’s been this like for a minute, but I’m not pushing it.”

Later that night, after you left, Kirishima knocked on Bakugou’s door. In one of his hands, he had a bowl of food that he cooked the day before.

“You’ve been in your room all day, bro! You need to help me set up!” he said.

Bakugou examined the boxing glove on his left hand. He wiggled his fingers only to realize it was way too stiff. Now he needed new gloves.

“M’ not hungry.”

Kirishima opened the door anyway and approached the boy, putting the dish on his desk. He looked at Bakugou and crossed his arms. "Something botherin' you, man?"

Bakugou huffed. Kirishima may have been a little slow, but he wasn't stupid. He could tell when his best friend is off.

Kirishima sighed. "(Y/n) and I noticed that you've been kinda distant lately. You barely come around anymore."

"Why is she always mentioned whenever we talk?"

Kirishima was taken aback. He raised an eyebrow.

Bakugou finally stood up, looking him dead in the eyes. "It's obvious you have a thing for her.

Kirishima stammered, unsure of how to respond. "I mean- I care about her as a friend, just like I do you. There's nothing more to it."

"You're always by her side, looking out for her, protecting her. Like you're fucking obsessed with her! It's pathetic!"

Kirishima shook his head in disbelief. "Just because I'm being a good friend doesn't mean I have ulterior motives. If you can't see that, then maybe you're the one with the problem here!"

Bakugou's body blazed with irritation. "You're fucking jealous that she pays more attention to me than she does to you."

Kirishima's jaw tightened. Immediately Bakugou knew he struck a nerve.

"Face it, Kirishima. She isn't interested, so back off. You're nothing compared to me."

Without another word, Kirishima turned on his heel, standing tall and steps firm as he walked away from the blonde. "Party is in three hours. Be ready."

Bakugou couldn't help but get another jab in as he listened to Kirishima mumble insults before slamming the door shut behind him.

"Stop worrying about me and start worrying about how you're gonna get your bitch off my dick!"

A wry smile formed on Bakugou’s lips as he recalled the telltale signs that hadn’t gone unnoticed before. Kirishima’s subtle glances in your direction, the way his eyes would light up whenever you entered the room, how his cheeks turned pink whenever you laughed at his jokes.

Bakugou knew his friend wouldn’t admit that he liked you, but he also knew you didn't know. You were nothing but a dumb bitch.

As they reached Kirishima's room, Bakugou held the door open, allowing Kirishima to guide you inside due to your unsteady steps. The room was untouched, bathed in a warm, inviting glow like it always had. It offered a haven of tranquility, opposite of the chaotic activities going on downstairs.

Kirishima led you to his bed, helping you settle down with gentle care. "Thanks. I'll stay with her for a bit. You can head back to the party if you want-"

He was interrupted by the sound of glass breaking. His eyes widened. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He got up and rushed out the door without an explanation, only a ‘be right back!’

Bakugou watched him go and contemplated leaving himself. Then he looked at you, your chest softly rising up and down and you breathe. He sighed and went to close the door before sitting down next to your resting body. He traced his fingertips down the side of your arm.

“You want me so bad, don't you?" he asked. But it was more of a rhetorical question.

Suddenly you nodded softly. "Y-Yeah..."

Oh, you were awake. Bakugou's eyes furrowed.

"More than anything..."

"Then prove it," he growled. "Prove to me that you're worthy of my attention."

Barely conscious, you didn't understand what he meant, but as the alcohol faded, your sense came back to you. Your willingness to do anything to win Bakugou over was back and took over your mind in an instant.

You began to unbutton your shirt, revealing your lacy bra. Bakugou watched you with a cold, calculating gaze.

"You think that's enough?" he scoffed. "You really are a dumb bitch who doesn't know anything."

Your eyes filled with tears. You'd never been spoken to like that before. Yet, something about it made you hot. His coldness and brutality made you rub your thighs together.

"Please, Bakugou," you pleaded.

Bakugou then shook his head as he began to knead your thigh. "Call me Katsuki."

You smiled. Finally, you were getting what you wanted. He saw you. He noticed you. He's into you.

"Please, Katsuki," you whispered. "Tell me what you want me to do..."

His hand kept moving all over your body. Your heart pounded in your chest, scared of what his response may be. But he never said anything, he just eyed you.

Looking you up and down, his index and ring fingers grazing over your lips. Suddenly, he popped them into your mouth. As if it was a reflex, you wrapped your lips around them, sucking on them sightly. He caught you off guard when he pressed against the bottom of your tongue, making you gag. You turned your head, hoping he'd pull away.

Bakugou chuckled. "Get up for me, baby, and strip."

He let you sit up but not before wiping your saliva off his fingers onto your cheek. You slowly stood in front of him, holding onto his shoulders for support. He leaned back, trying to get a better view of your full body.

Slowly you began to remove your clothes. You felt exposed. Way more vulnerable than you ever had before. You avoided his hungry gaze.

"You know..." he began.

You looked up at him, not stopping the motions of getting undressed.

"Kirishima likes you."

You smiled. "I like him too. He's a good friend."

Bakugou wanted to laugh in your face. Your naivety was cute. He decided to be nice and only nodded in agreement. He watched intensely as the article of clothing dropped to the floor. His eyes studied your undergarments. It was a matching set, in pink. Of course. He felt himself twitch.

He sat up and extended his arm out to your cheek, lightly caressing it. "That's not what I meant."

In a flash, he let go of your face to grab a fistful of your hair, pulling it back roughly. You whimper, your eyes shut tight. Your hands follow his actions, trying to pry him off.

"Aah! Katsuki, it hurts!" you winced in pain.

"Awe. Awe, it hurts? Yeah?" he mocked your tone before chuckling. "Can't even handle a little hair pulling."

He stood up, towering over you. He pushed you down slowly to your knees, praising you for your compliance. You shivered due to your bare body being exposed to the cold air.

With his other hand, he unbuckled his pants and unzipped himself. You listened to his pants fall and lightly bit your lip. Suddenly your face was pushed forward, being pressed into something hard.

You opened your eyes and looked up at Bakugou. You could see his rock-hard cock through his clean underwear. It curved slightly to the side and he was awfully big... and long... and thick.

You weren't a virgin but you weren't very experienced either. You'd never seen one so big before. You doubted that you were able to take that in any capacity. Not in your mouth, not in your pussy either, but you wanted so badly to impress him.

You rubbed your cheek against his dick, making him breathe out slowly. Bakugou pushed your head aside, harsher than he expected, and pulled down his underwear. He grabbed you by your cheeks and looked you in the eyes.

You were so beautiful like that. On his knees for him. Under him, below him; where you were meant to be.

Grabbing his cock, he slaps it against your face before pressing it to your lips. You open up, allowing him to smoothly slip it in.

"Ahh... shit..." he groaned as the warmth of your mouth took in his cock. You try to work your tongue around him as best as you could, his cock barely being able to fit in your mouth.

He gripped your hair in his fist as he began to move against your face, making you choke. The lipgloss you wore had been smeared, staining your mouth; your mascara ran down your cheeks as your eyes watered every time his cock slammed the back of your throat.

"Look at you. Eagerly swallowing my cock- fuck! Such a slut," he sighed.

Bakugou began to go faster, not giving you any time to take a break. You'd never been face fucked before, let alone roughly. Your gagging became more audible whenever your nose brushed against his pubes. You needed air, but he didn't give you any time to take a break.

You slapped his thigh a couple of times, trying to signal him. He understood; he just didn't care. Finally, he showed some mercy and pulled your hair back to allow you to breathe.

You gasped and cough. You let out unsteady breaths and it was hard for you to catch up to your normal pace of breathing. This didn't last very long though as Bakugou pried open your jaw, shoving his fingers in your mouth once again, this time reaching your throat. You choked again, more tears falling from your face. He kept his hand there for a few seconds, studying your pathetic attempt to please him. When you began to cough again, he pulled out.

"Impressive. Where'd you learn that?"

You felt your body growing even more tired than it was before. You opened your mouth to breathe, only for him to spit directly into it.

"Swallow."

You obeyed. His saliva slid down your throat with ease as you swallowed, and then you opened your mouth to show him. He smirked and stood up. You watched him lift you onto Kirishima's bed, positioning your head to dangle off the bed, facing the closed door.

You felt his tall, strong body leaning over yours as his mouth explored every inch of your skin. His fingers, still soaked with your saliva, slid off your panties and ran along your entrance. You were undeniably wet, and it was embarrassing. How easily you got wet. Bakugou thought it was adorable.

At first, his fingers rubbed just on top of your throbbing clit. You moan out softly, your hands moving down to his hair, playing with it a little. Your back arched at the sensation, causing him to push down your hips to keep you still.

"Look at yourself whoring out for me. You should be ashamed," he said.

He was right. You should have been ashamed. But... you weren't. You couldn't think straight, all you wanted in that moment was for him to be inside of you.

You lifted your head to watch him only for it to be put back down as his lips came up to kiss your neck. His fingers went faster, and you felt yourself squeeze around him. More moans came out of you as you concentrated.

His kisses, his fingers, his hot breath, his body.

His kisses, his fingers, his hot breath, his body.

Kisses, fingers, hot breath, body.

Kisses, fingers, breath, body.

Kisses, fingers, breath-

"M' gonna cum!" you cry out.

Bakugou faced you, his sharp canines showing as he laughed at you. You threw your head back and he lowered his face to nibble on your neck. You mumbled out incoherent words, on the verge of cumming.

A loud moan comes out of your mouth and immediately Bakugou pulls out. Your eyes widen, looking at him.

"No, no, no," you whined.

He ignored you and slapped his juices-covered hand over your face, pushing your head down yet again. It was too much for you. The pain of the bite on your neck went unnoticed when he forced his hips in between your legs, pulling you against him. He lined up his swollen cock with your cunt, slapping it a little. You moaned as he got himself wet with your juices mixed in with his precum.

He entered you without a warning and you screamed at the discomfort. You put your hands on his chest, whining. "Go slow, please!"

His gaze at you visibly softened. "You want me to be gentle, hm?"

You nodded, swallowing thickly. "Y-yeah... yeah..."

He whined just like you did. "Yeah? You want me to be soft with you? Help you adjust to my big dick?"

You repeated yourself. He smiled, carefully moving some strands of hair from your face. "You're so cute."

He slammed into you, instantly making you wail. His thrusts were slow, but hard. It hurt so bad. You whine in pain as his fingers went down to play with your clit again, laying a couple of smacks on your cunt.

Tears streamed down your face. The pain was excruciating, unlike anything you'd ever felt before. Your cunt was already sensitive, now paired with Bakugou's hand around your throat, and the pain slowly letting up, you felt so good. You were in heaven.

Bakugou's groans mixed in with your moans filled the room along with the sound of his balls slapping against you as his thrusts became even harder, you couldn't help but be loud, it wasn't like anybody could hear you. Your pussy throbbed around his cock and your back began to arch. You felt yourself coming closer and closer to your orgasm. And he noticed it.

He slowed down a bit. You were a little grateful as you were finally able to take him comfortably. But you questioned his change of pace.

"You know," he panted, "Kirishima wants us together."

You continued to moan, only murmuring over and over again how big his dick was, barely listening.

"He always talked about me and you- ugh...! Getting together..." he revealed. "Probably something he wants the most..." He lifted your head, putting his forehead to yours. "Let's do him a favor, yeah?"

The tightness on your throat grew tighter, cutting off your airflow, and his thrusts started to become harder again. Your eyes widened as your body struggled under his.

He whispered in your ear while increasing the pace of his strokes. "Be mine, baby. Cum all over my cock."

So you did. Your legs began to shake as your lungs begged for oxygen. Your orgasm was intense, your body squirming uncontrollably. He groaned as your pussy clenched around him for the last time. To be fair, he let go of your throat and your head went flying back over the edge of the bed.

You were officially head over heels for him. You would do anything to stay with him, even if it meant sacrificing your happiness and well-being. And you had a feeling he knew this.

The doorknob of the bedroom turned and the door opened. "Someone broke the damn vase with the-"

Kirishima.

He examined the scene before him, his breaths slowly becoming inaudible and his heart pounding in his chest.

Bakugou’s gaze snapped towards Kirishima, a smirk flashing across his face. "Kirishima. We didn't expect you to come in."

Kirishima ignored him, only focusing on you. His eye twitched as he took note of your cock drunk daze. You smiled innocently at him, your chest pumping up and down deeply.

"Kiri... I don't owe you one anymore."

He clutched his hands together, his knuckles turning white.

"You dumb bitch."

[thenightling]

The Satanic Panic (the unwelcome 80s throw-back)

Everything from the 1980s has made a come back. From LP records replacing CDs, to films like Beetlejuice and Ghostbusters. And literature like The Vampire Lestat (published in 1985) and Neil Gaiman's The Sandman (1988). And Broadway musicals based on 80s movies. Even skinny jeans for men made a come back. And late 80 Goth fashion. These are all great, fun, Nostalgic things. But... something else made a come back. The infamous Satanic Panic. If you're unfamiliar with the 80s Satanic Panic it wasn't all about thinking there were Satanists everywhere. It was sort of a blanket term for a rise in anti-semitism, anti-witchcraft, homophobia, and a weird surge in ped0pheila paranoia. When you think of the 80s Satanic Panic you think of the religious zealots burning Dungeons & Dragons tabletop role playing game manuals or thinking they hear Satanic messages in Heavy Metal albums or the extremely ignorant claiming that non-Abrahmic religions (or even Judaism) are actually worshipping Satan. I saw this make a disturbing comeback just yesterday when someone joined my The Sandman Facebook group with the rant that The Star of David is actually a Satanic symbol and has nothing to do with David. If you didn't grow up during The Satanic Panic you may have entirely missed the Ped0phelia aspect of it, which may have been worse than the claims that Satanists were / are secretly everywhere. It was a leap in logic that the Satanists are up to evil, and what is more evil than the sexual abuse and exploitation of children? So people started to imagine there were ped0philes everywhere, running daycare centres, or eccentric ex-boyfriends. Or LGBTQAI+ teenagers who came out of the closet were suddenly suspected of being a ped0 because if the person isn't straight, a very ignorant "friend" or family member might suddenly decide that the gay person is attracted to everyone of their gender, including children. The impact of the 80s Satanic Panic can still be felt. Innocent people, including Day Care Center owners, were convicted and couldn't get their verdicts over turned for decades. A bad breakup and a few whispers in her ear could lead to a mother believing the worst about her ex-husband without any evidence. There were cases of children being coached without the coachers even realizing that's what they were doing because the adults asked the children so many times in so many ways about sexual abuse that they were sure must have happened, that the kids just started saying what they thought their parents or grandparents wanted to hear. This was the era of "Stranger Danger." And it never quite stopped.

The ped0phelia paranoia is particularly strange. Do NOT take this to mean I am claiming Ped0phelia doesn't happen or isn't a real threat or that victims who come forward should be ignored. No. However, Q-anon revived this paranoia with things like "All Democrats are secretly ped0philes." "Hillary Clinton leads a Ped0phile ring." "The ped0philes in Washington and Hollywood are using the blood of children to unnaturally retain their youth. As far fetched as that sounds, people believe it. There was even that one guy who was so convinced that there was a secret dungeon under a pizza parlor that he showed up heavily armed and when he found out there was no basement he surrendered himself to police. Former rock star turned Hollywood composer, Danny Elfman, was recently accused of decades old sexual harassment but because of "catchy" headlines lots of people seemed to think he must have r8ped someone. Some people even dusted off his old Oingo Boingo song, "Little Girls" as proof of his perversion even though the song was actually intended to shame and call out Hollywood executives who would take advantage of underage girls. It wasn't the smoking gun they seemed to think it was. It was an anti-sexual abuse song. Much like how in the 1980s Pat Benatar's "Hell is for Children" (an anti-child abuse anthem) was mistaken as Satanist / pro-child abuse somehow... (Lyric comprehension / media literacy is haaaard). For over thirty-years we have lived in the comfortable myth of "Ha, people were silly in the past!" and then it started to happen again. People saw Satanists and ped0philes everywhere again in a strange spike in social paranoia, perhaps as a subconscious (and very bigoted) rebellion against the social changes happening such as more LGBTQAI+ rights and openness. You might think you're immune because you're a democrat with an open mind and statistically usually the people who fall for these things are... well... Qanon... But you are not immune. Anyone can fall for these sort of things. If you ever decided someone "looks like a pervert" because of how they dress, or you have started to humor the gossip and rumors about your "creepy neighbor"... maybe stop and remember it was "Normal" and "reasonable people" who took part in the Salem witch Hunts.

If you know someone who sees Satanism everywhere that isn't pious Christianity or a smaller non-Abrahamic religion, than know that it's not that big of a leap in logic for them to start making sexual (particularly ped0phile) accusations. I dare say this is even tied to the conservative anti-trans movement sprinkled with accusations of "grooming." This is one 80s fad I wish would die... again.

[aita-blorbos]

(Fangame OCs)

AITA for pulling a knife on a guy?

So, let me explain. I (19 F-leaning NB) and I think about 15 other people (ranging from 12 to 19, varying on the gender spectrum) got locked in a building a while ago that looked to be some kind of old-fashioned school building with stagelights everywhere and all sorts of weird shit. We were told by a "director" that we were trapped inside and to get out, we had to kill each other. Well, a couple people tried that and just got killed immediately, because you also need to get away with it, which was a fact conveniently left out in the initial explanation just to ensure the first person to break suffered the most. Among the group I was with was my baby cousin R (13F), who was basically like a little sister to me. R was very mature and extremely abrasive in personality, and was essentially treated like another one of the older members of the group. She also very quickly got on everyone's bad side with her stubbornness and distrust and continually bluffed about being capable of murder to keep people off her back. I saw through this immediately, but apparently I was the only one.

Fast forward to about two weeks in, we're informed that another murder has taken place. While searching for a body, I found R's yellow star earring and immediately knew she had been the victim. I found her body shortly after and I think it was understandable that I was a total wreck. About five minutes later, another girl, C (12F), was found dead at the bottom of a stairwell. To make a long story short, it turned out that C had confided in M (17F) that she had been pushed to kill R by someone else, and to prevent her from being executed, M sort of threw her down the stairwell in hopes of giving her a quick death. M tried to keep it secret who C had said incited the murder so as not to make anyone else suffer unnecessarily as she had intentionally tried to take the blame for everything, but it turned out it was a boy my age, V (19M). He tried to twist it so that it sounded like he was technically guilty and we had all voted wrong, meaning he had gotten away with it and could escape, but when this didn't work, he just emotionally shut down and mumbled something about how R was powerful and he feared her.

Here's where I may be the asshole here. When I called out that that was ridiculous and R was barely a teenager and he was almost twenty, I was met with the knowledge that I was the only person who saw R as a child and everyone else was genuinely intimidated by and afraid of her, worrying that her age and status (famous pop singer) would make her untouchable and leave her free to do whatever she wanted. I kind of lost it at this point (which I feel is understandable, but again I seem to be the only one) and I pulled out my grandfather's hunting knife from my skirt pocket and began swinging wildly at V, cutting up his face and punching him and just kind of aimlessly swinging at him. It took the strongest of us, N (17M) restraining me for almost a full minute before I even stopped swinging, and everyone was looking at me like I was dangerous afterward. I hadn't realized until then that they didn't even know I had a knife on me. One of the others called me a hypocrite for judging everyone who selfishly gave in to the killing game and yet being armed and ready to kill V when he hurt my cousin, which is understandable, and the worst part actually was that it was V himself who told them to get off my back and that they should be mad at him because he was the one who had put me through hell like this.

I don't think I was planning to kill V, and I only wanted to exact justice for R's premature death. I watched the light fade from her eyes just seconds before I got to her and I think she died before I could comfort her. I understand that had I actually killed him in cold blood I would have gone beyond a point of no return morally, and that it was likely scary for the others to see I had been armed the whole time, but V is a murderer. I feel like everyone except ironically V himself is going after me because I got violent when V premeditated a triple murder for his own gain. There is no coming back from that and while I'm absolutely not proud of the fact that I defaulted to violence like all the people I'd lambasted for doing the same, I feel like V is objectively in worse standing here, and R was all I had; am I the asshole?

[fraudulent-cheese]

So i watched the first half of ROTI! i don't have many thoughts honestly?

I don't care for Staci, i'll be honest. Her gimmick is repetitive and im glad she got booted first if this was the only thing the writters were gonna do with her. It would be funny if there was a grain of truth to her claims tho.

Dakota's pretty fun and i like the added focus on the interns this season, because let's be honest outside of one "haha the interns keep dying" joke in both TDI and TDWT there isn't much i belive? So yeah

also samkota's cute, idk what to say? God i wish the writters explored Dakota's character before the whole mutation thing.

Honestly all the ROTI girls are great, wish they got more than arcs about which boy they wanted to kiss because MAN ANNE MARIA AND JO ARE GREAT, Jo especially, she's currently my fav of the season. I wish they did more with both of them man!!! I don't like the jabs made about her appearence but i find them fine from Anne Maria specifically? Like yeah she would do that! I wish the girls were fighting for longer!

Dawn's one of the better characters but i wish her conflict with Scott lasted longer than one episode. Same with her friendship with B! What is it with Total Drama and throwing away interesting rivalries the episode they start at?!

B's fine i'll be real. I like how they don't actually make him speak! Other contestants do make jabs about it but like, they're teenagers, and one of them is from Scott and he's kinda shitty so it works lol

SPEAKING OF! Scott's pretty fun! He's not the best antagonist ever but he's fun to watch and that's enough for me rn. He's pathetic and shitty it's great

Team man is also fun, i like Brick especially. Don't like the frequency of the pissing himself jokes tho. Like, i get it! he's a military boy who likes fashion and pisses himself! Do something else!

I don't care for Cameron i'll be real. Neither for Zoey, i wish her flaws were explored more because dang she's judgy in episode 5!

I guess i'll talk about Mike here too? I think he's ok, but man i wish his alters were treated more like people. I don't mean the other contestants, i mean by the show. Svetlana's great for the small amount she's on screen for, and I like Chester and Vito more than i thought i would! Please show explore them a little more! (and, well, to state the obvious, don't call it mpd why did it call it mpd it wasn't even the actual term for it when the show was being written)

My least favorite part is the love triangle tho. It's suffering from a critical case of "Warrior's miscommunication": a miscommunication plotline that could be solved in a single conversation, but the characters involved don't tell anyone because we need to stretch this book to 300 pages! or in this case, the plotline to last the whole season!

I get Mike not wanting to tell Zoey because his whole thing is not wanting to tell people, and Vito not telling Anne Maria because he's fucking dumb and considering his relationship with Anne Maria wasn't in a position where he needed to disclose it, but LIKE!!! COME ON MAN!!! this could be solved so easily and they just,,, didn't. Also why can't Vito still date Anne Maria at the end he's his own person!

i'll be real i think i like the idea that Anne Maria and Vito are still friends they just make-out too, mostly because that's all they really do in the show (and also i like Jomaria more)

OK ENOUGH ABOUT THE SYSTEM MORE ABOUT THE LAST CONTESTANT

I don't care for Lightning oops. He's funny sometimes. The "Jo is a guy" jokes get old quick tho.

THAT'S IT ON CONTESTANT THOUGHTS SO FAR!

The challenges are fine? I think a couple are pretty good (the treasure hunt for instance) but a couple are less good? (the Obstacle Course is eh, i don't really care about the mine one) but honestly i wish they just executed a couple better. Like the Embarrasing questions, climbing the mountain, hell even the relay-race could've honestly been wayyy better than they actually were! At least they're camp related!

But yeah so far ROTI's pretty good, 6/10 with 8/10 characters.

[1-up-chump]

The day mk abandoned the kung fu death tournament high eastern fantsy aesthetic and then copied the Dcu/mcu aesthetic

Is the day mk fuckin died. It started with the cash grab crossover, then the dlc guest characters, and now this convoluted inconsistent assassination of characters.

Examples:

sin\del (was supposed to be manipulated by dark magiks from q=uan chi. Was never fuckin evil and never killed jerrod bc SH/AO KAH/N DID AND THATS SCREWING HIS CHARACTER OVER TOO all for some mommy dommy milf fantasy which is absolutely from a "hetcis man's" gaze dont fool yourself)

ku\ng la\o (turned him into a second banana cocky type and just keep killing him for shock value when before he kinda never got this treatment. He was is and always WILL be li/u kan/g's equal in skill and warriors heart)

ra\iden (a LITERAL GOD who was so strong he was only bound by the rules of mortal kombat and the elder gods and his soft spot for mortals and loyalty to protecting earthrealm, kind and wise. Turned into a supposed dEmi-GOd who was willing to use the realm that was his charge as a fucking bargaining chip to a man who's more untrustworthy than shan/g ts/ung, he's hardly around OR he's suddenly not as powerful until he remembers he can obliterate ppl with lightning, he's a cold hardass who's so alien to mortals emotions despite being around them longer and basically raising one like his own son)

li\u k\ang (turned into basically every shonen protagonist ever type levels of character development, gets fucked over in the romance department Although kit/ana has her fair share of problems with writing too, becomes a god in the most deus ex machina way possible and is so intrusive to kun/g la/o and his legacy to meddle with the great kung lao like some sort of savior bs)

sha\ng tsun\g before aftermath (having his whole ass character trashed to the side for some milf dominatrix fantasy in 9 is the only reason i fucking need here lbh)

son\ya (her whole character is stale and practically revolved around the fact she fucks and marries a dude she's so incompatible with just bc of "we need the original characters to make next gen characters we dont care if they're compatible lol" literally has an accidental pregnancy literally divorced jo/hny and then fucking dies, and then comes back anyways "but its the version fans like right oh btw shove in the fact that Son/ya's purpose is to malke cas/sie and thats it shes just mom character now but #gurlboss am i right plz buy game")

ja/x (gets traumatized to hell and back for very little payoff used as depression fetish exploitation, at least his tower ending is great despite the "#woke" bs, his daughter however has the most fucked ending to basically erase herself to make j/ax happy like???? Sonya literally has an avengers/justice league ass tower ending all peachy keen but the black woman cant have any happiness huh mmm sure ok yeah.)

Jacq/ui (honestly im not too into her character but when i heard about her tower ending it pissed me off so much and made me hate the writing even more like oh some characters get basically whatever they wanted no consequence but some characters are doomed to be fucked??? Like hello favoritism MUCH?!? -coughhanzosgodofwarripofftowerendingcough-)

with new characters added that have so much potential but poor execution (i mean seriously you wanna tell me ce/trion and kroni/ka actually killed the elder gods THE ELDER GODS AKA THE BIG POWERFUL DIVINE COUNSEL but have trouble with making rai/d/en and li/u fi/ght and kill each other??? Let alone try to kill one at a time??)

I do like some things like kolle/ctor and ge/rus and cet/rion like i like those characters but by god cetr/ion was wasted potential you cant drop her brother was fucking shinn/ok and then proceed to basically make her some weak errand girl who i feel in the end is making fun of the "divine feminine gaia" aesthetic like the writing wants her to be the bad guy but also sympathetic in the dumbest way possible and she sounds like someone on Twitter who just learned about the concept of "balance" and slaps buddha quotes incorrectly

Also i never cared for shin/nok until recently when i was like "hey wait no his concept kinda slaps actually"

At the end of the day we all have our opinions i guess. And mine is: mk new timeline is written by people who like superheroes movies when mk should be written by people who like kung fu movies

[wander-over-the-words]

Make Like An Atom

Summary: In which Nick’s “brother” is having his partner join a cult, and Nick might just have one or two grievances about that.

Characters: Nick Valentine, [Male] Sole Survivor (Nathan “Nate” West), Grand Zealot Richter; mentions of DiMA, Kasumi Nakano, Brian Virgil, Old Longfellow, High Confessor Tektus, Ellie Perkins, Father/Shaun, Paladin Danse, original Nick Valentine, Kenji Nakano, Eddie Winter, Piper Wright, Nat Wright, Dogmeat, Codsworth, Synth Shaun, John Hancock, Skinny Malone, Jennifer Lands.

Pairing: [Male] Sole Survivor/Nick Valentine.

Warnings: cult-related business, use of derogatory language toward the mentally ill (nothing people don’t call the Children of Atom in canon), radiation poisoning, description of vomiting; mentions of death, murder, execution, firearm usage.

Disclaimer: The Sole Survivor in this is based off how I played him - personality, looks, choices and all.

Notes: First Fallout 4 fic. Takes place during Far Harbor, and after the main story. I’ve always thought it was really sweet how genuinely worried Nick sounds when the Sole Survivor has to join the Children of Atom (he sounds like he’s trying to talk them out of it when it comes to going into the Nucleus), so here’s a fic about Nick being concerned about his bf joining a cult that worships something that could potentially kill him. Cause y’know you probably would be too. And let’s be real: that scene where the SS has to drink the irradiated water must look worrying as hell from Nick’s point of view.

Extra notes: This fic has literally been sitting around for about a year and I’m sick of having it hanging over me, mocking me, so I’m using the excuse of the “obligatory posting Nick Valentine content on Valentine’s Day” to finally get the damn thing posted.

All material belongs to Bethesda.

Fic available on AO3.

…

This is going too far. To hell with it - it’s already gone too far.

Nick honestly - shamefully - hadn’t thought much of it when DiMA wanted Nate to pose as a new recruit for the Children of Atom in order to gain access to their base. His mind had been so clogged with the recent revelations: the possibility of DiMA being family, this supposed information that his own head is failing to store all of his memories, Kasumi’s worries that DiMA is up to mischief, the fact that this case is proving to be a bigger doozy than just leaving the familiarity of the Commonwealth to find one lost girl.

And besides - the Children haven’t seemed like that big a threat until this point, at least in Nick’s experience. There’d been those who had attacked when people had trespassed upon their property (but, hey, who doesn’t do that in the Commonwealth?), but the bunch he and Nate had encountered in the Glowing Sea had been friendly, if just weary. Friendly enough, at least, to give them directions to Virgil’s cave, and to do no more than that.

Turns out, the folks back in Far Harbor had been right when they said everything on this island was bred nastier than that of the Commonwealth. Even extends to the people.

Stumbling upon the Children’s little ‘test of faith’ was not only proof of that, but a pretty fine wake-up call.

It’d been an even bigger wake-up call when the Grand Zealot told Nate what he’d need to do, to see if ‘Atom’ wanted Nate in their beloved group: go and drink irradiated water from the spring nearby and see what ‘Atom’ showed him.

Of course - Nate being Nate - he’d headed off without hesitation, and once they’d gotten to the spring and their geiger counters had started going haywire, Nick had had to speak up. He’d tried to suggest they just lie and say they did it.

Nate had brought up the prospect of them saying the wrong thing and losing the chance to get into the submarine base; joining up and thus doing what the Children asked of him was the only way to get in through non-violent means, like DiMA had wanted (not that non-violent means wouldn’t have been the plan anyway, as Nick’s proud to say he and his guy are on the same page about unnecessary violence).

Nick knows Nate well enough to know that he was going to go through with drinking the damn water, no matter what Nick said, so Nick had told him to at least take a Rad-X before doing this, but Nate had frustratingly turned that down too by ‘reminding’ him that the Children were obviously hoping the rads would do something to him, and the Rad-X might stop that from happening. Assured him he’d be fine, he’s gotten dosed with rads before, they have RadAway handy, everything will be fine.

Then he’d cupped his hands under the trickling water, brought it to his lips and swallowed it down.

Nick can’t begin to describe the panic that’d shot through him when Nate had choked, spraying water from between his teeth as he fought not to spit it out, and collapsed against the rocks, violently coughing, gasping for air; Nick had raced to grab the RadAway from their supplies immediately when he’d heard Nate gasp like he was shocked, and he’d looked up to find Nate staring, staring, up at the rocks above them, at…at something. When Nick had looked, he’d seen nothing - there’d been nobody there, his detection programming wasn’t picking up anything, but Nate had obviously been so sure, for he’d tracked it with his eyes as he’d stumbled away from the rocks, out of the spring, following this…thing he was seeing.

And then he’d taken off, staggering into Fog so thick, he’d almost immediately become a silhouette, and Nick had torn after him, calling for him and asking him what was wrong, what was he seeing.

He hadn’t gotten any answers at the time; Nate was muttering to himself, looking around like the world was unfamiliar to him, and Nick had turned up his auditory receptors to hear him. Occasionally, Nate would stop and say something to somebody - a confused “E-Excuse me,” or “Hello?” - or tell himself this couldn’t be real, and a couple of times, Nick had nearly jumped out of his synthetic skin when Nate had cried out in alarm and stopped suddenly like he was avoiding something, nearly making Nick crash into him.

Nick’s just glad he’d been coherent enough to take down the ferals waiting for them at the shrine Nate’s delusions had led them to. The second Nate had stopped talking nonsense and seemed to come back to reality - when Nick could hear him trying to work out the password to the terminal in the shrine - Nick had been pulling his sleeve up to find a vein to pump RadAway into, ushering Nate to sit down outside while he recovered.

Frighteningly, Nate’s face had been grey, he’d been bleeding from his nose and from the scrapes on his forehead and cheeks from where he’d crashed into the rocks back at the spring, and Nick had spotted a few loose strands of hair on the shoulders of Nate’s coat. Before Nick could get a needle into his arm, Nate had swatted his hands away, grunted out a request for him not to look, and had promptly vomited onto the ground beside them, which brought perhaps a small amount of relief that the poisoned water was officially out of Nate’s system (alongside some of that mirelurk jerky Longfellow had given him).

Once he’d successfully started to get RadAway into Nate’s system and collected a purified water from their supplies to wash his mouth out, Nick had wrenched Nate’s road goggles up into his shaggy hair to see the dazed and fatigued look in his bloodshot eyes, and he’d asked Nate how many fingers he was holding up to check how well the RadAway was flushing the so-called vision from Nate’s system. Even treated him to a stimpak for the wounds on his face, once the radiation allowed for proper healing again.

That’d been another little wake-up call: the rads. Maybe he’d thought too little of it before. There’s no way the Nucleus is as bad as the Glowing Sea, but if it’s enough to keep these fanatics happy…Well, they might be out of their depth here.

Or, at least…Nate is.

There’d been some icon…thing in the shrine, and the Grand Zealot is so pleasantly shocked when Nate shows it to him (because, of course, even to these crazies, Nate would turn out to be something special), and then comes the point of no return.

“I am ready to follow His path,” Nate says.

“Then it will be so,” the Grand Zealot replies.

Nick can’t help himself; he speaks up without even really thinking about it.

“I’m not sure this is such a good idea,” he says. “We barely know these people.”

He catches the slight twitch of Nate’s head as he just barely stops himself from turning around and looking at Nick, and the Grand Zealot looks at him with disdain but says nothing to him. He sees the way Richter looks at Nate, as if expecting Nate to say something in his place, probably tell ‘his’ synth to pipe down, but Nate doesn’t acknowledge it, so Richter goes on like Nick isn’t even there.

He gives a nod to the icon in Nate’s hand. “Head inside and present the icon to the High Confessor once his sermon is done. He’ll be interested in seeing that. Once you’ve spoken with him, you should come see me. Have a task I think you’d be useful for.”

Nick doesn’t like the way he says that.

“And here.”

Richter reaches back and holds a hand out to the guard standing behind him, who hands him a mass of dark fabric and a pair of boots, and Richter gives these to Nate.

“Some more…appropriate attire.” His already-serious expression turns into a harsh frown. “But know this: we are all devoted servants to Atom here. Messenger or no, actions against the Family will not be tolerated.”

Glancing at the body still strewn on the ground nearby, Nick thinks back to the ‘test of faith’ and his coolant turns to ice.

The frown lets up; does this man ever smile?

“Welcome, brother.”

Icon tucked under his arm, Nate looks the outfit over, then smiles with a nod and tells Richter he’s just going to change into this, he’ll meet him inside.

Richter gives him a nod, and Nate and Nick are left outside as Richter disappears into the Nucleus.

Nate gives a huff of a chuckle as he turns around, carrying the bundle of fabric, the boots and the icon as he leads the way back in the direction they’d come.

“You’re gonna blow my cover with talk like that, Nick,” he says quietly over his shoulder as Nick follows him.

“Can’t say I’d be sorry to,” Nick says honestly and just as quietly. “I’m tellin’ ya, doll, I’ve got a bad feeling about all this, and my ‘bad feelings’ are rarely wrong. Come on. Maybe we should just focus on getting Kasumi home - make like DiMA and forget about all this.”

“What, and lose the chance to find out what’s in DiMA’s memories, even though it could end up affecting this whole island?” Nate says with a hint of dramatics, then gives a small snort as he adds, more seriously, “Doesn’t sound like the Nick I know…”

He disappears behind one of the junk fences lining the Children of Atom’s land; Nick stays on the other side to give Nate his privacy, trying to look nonchalant as he feels the eyes of the man at the door on him.

“Yeah, well, the Nick you know didn’t have to watch you poison yourself with rads and go running off into dangerous Fog whilst prattling on about some figure you were seeing. This Nick did, so he’s starting to think this whole ‘joining the Children of Atom’ thing might’ve been a step too far.”

“No turning back now,” Nate says, and Nick can hear the shrug.

Nick frowns softly and opens his mouth to reply, only to stop when the collar of Nate’s coat (the one Ellie had given him as part of the detective outfit he’d received along with the offer of being Nick’s new partner, old clothes of Nick’s) falls into view as it hits the ground, and another shot of ice goes through Nick’s coolant.

That coat has been fitted with ballistic weave, so Nate is shedding his armour for the sake of this charade - meaning he’ll have no protection if someone tries to hurt him.

God knows Nate’s been through some dangerous stuff, and he’s done amazing things since clambering out of Vault 111. He’s already played double agent before, in both the Institute and the Brotherhood (triple agent? Quadruple?), and those had had their own fair share of risks too, but this is…this is different. The Institute were overzealous boogeymen, and Nate had had his son’s good word to protect him, and the Brotherhood were high and mighty zealots who just liked to hear Nate say ‘Ad victoriam’, and they’d trusted Danse’s vouching for him, but these people?

Well, they’re just plain off their rockers, and there’s nobody this time around to make sure Nate is left unbothered in this irradiated hell of unpredictable cultists. And he wishes Nate wouldn’t just…dive head-in and play the hero so recklessly.

(He’s being a huge hypocrite, of course, and Ellie would laugh at his claim about having ‘feelings’ at all about cases, but this isn’t about him, it’s Nate who’s in danger here.)

“Sure there is,” Nick replies. “We just don’t go in an’ let these people try and indoctrinate us.”

“They’re already expecting me, Nick,” Nate says; his tie is discarded onto his coat. “I found this…icon thing, remember? And I saw the, ah,” he puts on a deeper voice of faux-awe, “‘Mother of the Foooog’!”

(Nick might’ve laughed, in another situation.)

“Besides,” Nate goes on over the sound of rustling fabric, “what would we tell DiMA if we didn’t even get to go into the Nucleus? What would we tell Kasumi?”

Nick arches a brow. “That the plan was nuts and we didn’t wanna go through with it?”

“Nick…” Nate says through a fond chuckle. There’s a beat where Nick only hears the shuffling of fabric again, then Nate adds, “We’ve already committed ourselves to the cause. You really wanna just leave Kasumi’s worries floating in the wind like that?”

No, of course, he doesn’t, but…

“Well, we…don’t hafta do it this way. Found another way into the Institute, we can find another way into this place, even if we just…grab ourselves a couple Stealth Boys and wing it.”

“Ah! Sooo, what you’re saying is: I drank some poisoned water foooor…nothing?”

Of all the times to show his wit…

“Nate…”

“Why the hesitation, Nick?” Nate says. “Kasumi’s counting on us, DiMA’s expecting results and the Children already think I must be some sort of figure the ‘Mother of the Fog’ is speaking through or…something. Besides -”

There’s a beat where Nate doesn’t say anything, just gives a grunt, and then there’s the clicking of metal.

Then comes a soft thud and Nick looks to see that it’s Nate’s shoe that has hit the ground, landing atop his fallen coat and tie, and he realises Nate is changing into those boots - that clicking had been the sound of his prosthetic foot being shimmied out of its shoe.

“ - this is an opportunity, remember? To find out if DiMA was telling the truth about you guys having history. Aren’t you excited about that, at least?”

“Not sure ‘excited’ is the word for it…” Nick mutters, brow furrowed as he casts his gaze to the ground, catching the sight of Nate’s second shoe joining the first out of the corner of his eye.

It’s been an uncomfortable lump in the back of his mind ever since DiMA apparently recognised him, the prospect that DiMA is right and Nick has just…forgotten him.

When he’d awoken in that junk pile, still of half a mind that he was the real Nick Valentine, he’d just assumed he was blending in with that which was around him: trash. The Institute’s trash that they’d - he didn’t know - gotten bored of. Maybe he wasn’t doing what he was told and so the Institute got tired of trying to tie their strings to his wrists and make him dance, maybe they’d just found a new project and decided this dingy old prototype wasn’t fun to poke and prod at anymore.

The idea that someone wanted him out, helped him escape…no. Never been a thought. With the way the Institute treated synths, the very idea of mercy, let alone help, was laughable. But a second prototype…sure, he’s wondered if he was the only one ever made, but the fact that another prototype had not only been made and been with him that whole time, but had assisted him in getting out, is…well, it’s knocking a screw loose.

Another prototype…A ‘sibling’. A ‘brother’. Is that how it works? Are they family because they were on the same assembly line? Because they were…‘raised’ together?

When he thinks of his time in the Institute, he thinks of the single room he was in, the feeling of knowing somebody’s eyes were always on him, the yanking of parts coming loose in his head as they pulled him apart and put him back together, but he never thinks of a face like his own. Of someone…being there, with him, in the room.

Was it DiMA’s eyes that were always on him, or their creator’s, or both?

It’s all so confusing, he’s dangerously close to being overwhelmed - so the fact that they’re getting nearer and nearer to potential proof is causing him all sorts of levels of trepidation. If DiMA is right about them being brothers, then he’s right about everything else: that he really is just forgetting things because he can’t stuff anymore memories into his head. He hadn’t remembered Kenji at first, after all…and if he can’t fit anymore memories in, then…how long will it be before his hardware starts tossing out other things, important things, more recent things? The good times he’s had as of late, the fact that he’d completed his mission to get revenge on Winter, the people he knows and loves? Their motley crew back at Sanctuary, and the likes of Piper, Nat, Codsworth, Dogmeat, Shaun, Ellie…Nate…?

The idea of that, it…it scares him. Badly.

But that isn’t what’s important right now. What is important is the fact that DiMA’s little plan is putting Nate in the heart of an irradiated cult who carelessly gun down their own and want to shove rads down Nate’s throat until he’s as sickly and insane as the rest of them.

“And I appreciate how eager ya are to help me with that,” Nick goes on, “but…”

“But…?” Nate presses him.

Nick hesitates, then comes out with it: “But no answer would be worth it…if it costs you, doll.”

There comes silence then, even the sounds of outfits being changed has stopped, and Nick waits for Nate’s answer to that. No doubt, some other attempt at getting him to agree to this harebrained scheme, knowing Nate. He does love what a do-gooder his guy is, but even he has his limits.

“...Nick, could you…come back here with me for a moment? I, uh…don’t think I’m putting this on right.”

Nick blinks once, surprised.

Not the response he’d expected from putting his heart on his sleeve; Nate’s priorities are getting a little skewed. Besides, he hadn’t thought those robes looked particularly difficult to put on - looked sort of just like a jumper and some trousers to him - but heck, what does he know about the uniforms of these loons?

“Uh…alright,” he says confusedly, putting a hand to the fence as he turns on the spot.

He steps behind the junk wall, and before he can process the sight of Nate before him in full uniform, the lapels of his coat are grabbed and he’s pulled forward so suddenly he nearly falls, and Nate’s body is crushed against his in a hug.

Caught off-guard, Nick takes a moment to fully recognise what’s happening, his body frozen and his hands hovering in the air, then his autonomy comes back to him and he returns Nate’s hug, slowly. His hands go to Nate’s upper back and he holds him as he feels Nate lean his head against his own, shifting his fedora. The man’s got only two inches of height over him, but somehow, he’s one of the few people who have ever made Nick feel…small.

“I’ll be alright, Nick,” Nate says, close to Nick’s ear, warmly but seriously. “I promise. I’m not gonna let them talk me into doing anything that I can’t happily be a part of. We’re just gonna go in there, grab DiMA’s memories and go, and we’ll figure the rest out later.” There’s a beat. “Besides, you…do know this is just an act, right? That I don’t really believe in all this ‘Atom’ junk?”

“Course I know,” Nick says, then sighs through his nose. “It’s just that this meeting with the Children of Atom turned out…a little different than what I expected. The folks we came across in the Glowing Sea didn’t even point a gun at us, but these people…”

He gives another small sigh, then breaks the hug so he can look Nate in the face, transferring his hands to Nate’s waist instead as he remains in Nate’s personal bubble.

Looking him in the face has become slightly more rewarding, since Nate has had the courtesy of moving his road goggles up into his chestnut brown hair, giving Nick the opportunity to have his own yellow eyes lock with Nate’s hazel-blue ones.

“Just…watch what you say in there, will ya? Don’t want you endin’ up like that other guy.”

He glances in the direction of the man who had been killed, and Nate puts a hand to Nick’s cheek and turns his head to bring Nick’s attention back to him.

“I always watch what I say. And if I don’t, well - I got you around to keep me in line, right?” he asks, and when he gets a small smile, he leans forward to kiss it.

Nick gladly returns his kiss, turning it from a simple peck to a deeper smooch, enough that both of them close their eyes and hold it for a few calming seconds before Nate breaks it to smile at him.

Nick still looks concerned, thinking back to the image of Nate, dazed and pale, bleeding from his nose, starting to lose his hair, sitting next to his own puke. Nate’s been hit with rads on their travels before, but Nick had never seen him look so…ill.

“Don’t suppose you…packed your hazmat suit?”

He knows how ridiculous he sounds - if Nate packed his suit, Nick would know it, his bag ain’t that spacious - and such as it is, Nate laughs at the prospect.

“No, I didn’t,” he adjusts Nick’s lapels, straightening them from where he’d grabbed at them, “and we don’t really have the time to head back to Sanctuary to pick it up. I’d…probably be offending them, anyhow.” He gives a hiss of a laugh. “They’d probably accuse me of,” he puts on a deeper, dramatic voice, “blocking Atom’s holy touch! Such blasphemy!”

Nick can’t help the short chuckle that leaves him as he hangs his head.

“Alright…” he says wearily. “I can see when I’m beat.” He lifts his head back up to look Nate in the eye seriously. “But you tell me if you start gettin’ sick, alright? Don’t try and play the tough guy act and muscle through it, not even if one of those Children are around to hear you complaining…I’m not losin’ you to rad poisoning.”

“I could end up as a Ghoul instead.” Nate shrugs a shoulder, looking up like he’s genuinely thinking about this. “Hancock’s always saying I’d make a great Ghoul.”

“Yeah, well, he would.” He gives Nate’s waist a shake. “But I’m bein’ serious here.”

“I know, Nick. I’ve been watching my rad count ever since I realised my Pip-Boy has a geiger counter.” Nate looks at him and smirks. “Since when did you go all Mother Hen?”

“Since my guy decided drinking poisoned water for the sake of a bunch of cultists was a good idea.”

“Leeet’s be honest here, Nick: is it really…the weirdest thing I’ve ever done?”

“I’ll get back to you on that verdict,” Nick says dryly, “depending on what happens next.”

Nate laughs, leaning in to Nick’s embrace, and thusly, Nick brings him in and holds him close.

Best thing to happen to him in perhaps ever, this man; saved him from Skinny Malone, from wrestling with the original Nick Valentine’s past for the rest of his days, had so happily helped him find all those holotapes, stood aside and let him kill Eddie Winter on his own and then stood by him where Jennifer Lands had died and let Nick say his piece. Brought him on this whirlwind of an adventure that culminated in exterminating the boogeyman that had had the Commonwealth running scared for so long - and through it all, went ahead and made Nick fall for him.

How many of Nick’s clients could say they’d done that?

Just the one - this one right here, in Nick’s arms (though he hasn’t been just a client for a long while now).

So if anything happens to Nate while they’re carrying out this plan of DiMA’s, Nick will be taking his grievances straight back to ‘bro’.

Nate pulls back from their hug, and Nick rests his metal hand on Nate’s cheek, thumb brushing tenderly over the sideburn lining his jaw, before Nate takes a step back, removing himself from Nick entirely. He pulls his road goggles back down over his eyes, then ushers Nick over with a quick curl of his fingers.

“Here,” he says, “gimme your hand.”

“Hm?”

Nick watches as Nate stoops to pick up a boot, and only then does Nick realise their hug had interrupted Nate completing his new look: his right foot’s found its way into the new boot the Children have provided, while the left is naked, since Nate doesn’t bother putting a sock on his prosthetic.

“Oh,” Nick says, understanding, and offers a hand for Nate to hold so he can balance himself as he goes to one foot, shimmying the boot over his fake foot.

Once he’s finally managed to get it on, he’s all set. Nate steps back and holds out his hands to put himself on display.

“So,” he says, “how do I look?”

Nick looks him up and down, taking in the sight of Nate in the baggy, dark robes, and he replies exasperatedly, “Like a fanatic.”

“Hm - that’s great,” Nate replies, ducking to collect the coat, tie and shoes of his discarded outfit (he’s wearing the robes over his shirt and trousers, evidently), “then I’ll fit right in.”

Nick can’t help the small scoff of a chuckle that leaves him as Nate stuffs his clothes into his bag. Before he can pick the bag up, Nick ducks down and retrieves a bottle of Rad-X from one of its front pockets, waving it at him.

“I’ll slip ya these when you start lookin’ pale,” Nick says. He pops open the bottle, shakes out a pill onto his palm, then holds it out. “Best to take one now, before we head in there.”

Nate hesitates, then stands up to look at Nick properly.

“Are you sure you wanna come in there with me?” he asks. “DiMA said these people accept synths, but…the looks they were giving you when we showed up…”

“Tryin’ to get rid of me, huh?” Nick asks teasingly. “Didn’t think I was being that much of a wet blanket. But you can forget it - you’re not going in there without me, no matter how these people feel. Remember: DiMA said there was some Pre-War security keepin’ the Children of Atom from getting their paws on those memories of his. Could be anything in there, and I’d feel a whole lot better about all this if I was there to watch your back.”

“Are you sure?” Nate winces and adds hesitantly, “I mean…you do look a lot like DiMA. If anyone in there has a problem with him…they could have a problem with you too.”

Nick shrugs. “Half the Commonwealth has a problem with me. Hasn’t stopped me yet.”

Nate gives him a small smile. “Alright. It’s your call. But you may have to hold me back if anybody in there says anything about you.”

“Hey, now,” Nick cracks a smile (he doesn’t approve of Nate’s wish to pummel anybody who gives him lip, but it is sweet), “DiMA wants us doin’ this without violence, remember?”

“Sure, but,” Nate stoops to collect a can of purified water from his bag, “I feel like DiMA would understand if I told him I punched a guy in your honour.”

Nate stands up and plucks the pill from Nick’s palm, sits it on his tongue, then gulps down some water. He gives a hard swallow as the pill goes down, then nods once and drinks the rest of the water from the can. He drops the can to the ground, squashes it with his prosthetic foot, then returns the metal to his bag, most likely to convert it into raw materials for building projects later; funny, what one can make with junk.

Nate picks up his bag and rolls his shoulders, clapping his hands once in preparation.

“Alright,” Nate says, “let’s do this.”

He passes by Nick to walk around the fence, and Nick sighs wearily as he watches him go.

“Yeah,” he mumbles. “Let’s.”

He follows Nate, gaining the attention of the guard by the door, who watches them closely as they approach. For a moment, Nick thinks he might be suspicious, but then the man just tells Nate that the High Confessor is in the middle of his sermon still, and that Nate should listen in.

Nate gives an obedient nod and raises a triumphant, excited fist as he slaps on a grin and exclaims, “Glory to Atom!”

As Nate disappears into the Nucleus, Nick casts the guard a deadpanned look and half-heartedly raises his own fist.

“What he said,” Nick adds dryly, and follows Nate inside.

[forkaround]

Wedding Impossible ep 1 was cute. Jury is still out on how good the show will actually be. I'm just glad to see a gay character being proactive in the story. BLs just aren't cutting it with their characters and stories anymore.

As a lover of analyzing things and people I would love to see how far they take the gay relationship. ATM I'm happy if the guy has a name, a personality and if they just touch lovingly a little. I don't expect the show to have a kiss on the lips. And I am interested in seeing how people (kdrama fans) react to this.

I love that Do Han is taking a step to secure his life as he wants it and there seems to be some angry in him. Love that. Ah Jeong is a lot of fun, she is so uppity and ready to throw a punch. Love an action girl. I still have hopes for Ji Han. IDK if the writers would make him homophobic for the drama or what. He is just petulant and the way the grandfather said: Ji Han is his blemish. What does that mean sir? WHat the hell does that mean?!

So I'm getting that Do Han and Ji Han are illegitimate sons of the CEO Grandfather's daughter and the rest are legitimate but I don't know who their parents are. If anyone knows, let me know. I would think the grandfather would hate Do Han and Ji Han the most since they are illegitimate but he seems to like them the most. Maybe it's because they are the only ones who haven't messed up.

So far the show has been average. Nothing special other than the SML being gay. But Kdramas have been surprising with how well they execute common plots and tropes lately so maybe that's what's happening.

[gekkoukanstrega]

Meeting Ryoji in the AU

To summarize: The team (including Gekkoukan!Strega) gets to meet Ryoji at school for the first time. It was not an ideal introduction for any of them...

Akihiko: So, it appears we have a new student.

Mitsuru: Indeed. There was no files containing his history or anything, but the student claims it just got "lost elsewhere" and they took him in as that. We had to struggle making our own documentation for Aigis to get her in.

Aigis: This man is dangerous and poses a threat! I shall protect our leader at all costs!

Jin: Yeah I don't trust this guy one bit. Who does he think he is anyway?

Mitsuru: What do you mean?

Yukari: Well just so you are aware he's been going around flirting with every girl he meets. He did that to me once after talking with you and he just won't stop!

Chidori: It's true. He did that to me on his first day...

*flashback*

Ryoji, goes to sit down next to her: Ah, good morning young lady. It's a beautiful day outside-

Chidori: I'm taken.

Ryoji: ...

*later on*

Junpei: Hey, was it true that you tried to hit on my girlfriend? You should be a little more careful who you're talking to sometimes.

Ryoji: Ah, I'm incredibly sorry. You see it's hard to ignore such a beautiful butterfly like your lady here sitting all alone on the porch. My senses got the best of me. You have such quite a catch.

Junpei, blushes: Hehe, she is a cutie isn't she?

Chidori, angrily: You stupid idiot...!

*flashback ends*

Junpei: Yeah, what can I say? He was right.

Kotone, humming: Well, I think he was just being a nice gentleman with no ulterior motives. Maybe he just wanted to make a good impression.

Shinjiro: I'll give him an impression if he doesn't knock his shit off! Losers like him has no reason to pull this kind of crap in the first place.

Mitsuru: And what about you Yamagishi? Did this man bother you at all since he came to school...?

Fuuka: Oh, well, we did run into each other by the lockers the other day...

*flashback*

Ryoji: My, you have such a lovely face. What's your name, miss? I wouldn't mind taking you out to a lovely dinner, just between the two of us-

Jin, intercepts: And what the hell you think you're doing!?

Ryoji: Oh, gosh, I'm so sorry, haha... are you two- uh- well a-anyways, I should get going. It was nice meeting you, haha...

*flashback ends*

Fuuka: Now I couldn't really say exactly what was going on, but I think what Jin-senpai did was quite- uhm... aggressive...

Jin: Tch, I see what he was doing. He was getting all up on your business, putting on a 'nice guy' attitude. We shouldn't show him any mercy.

Aigis: Agreed. He must be executed at once!

Mitsuru, sighs: Guys, please...

[checkoutmybookshelf]

Yes, Sirens are FREAKING AWESOME

Ok y'all...the plan was not to inhale this book in a single day. I'm trying to balance a few different books, so I was just gonna read a few chapters, maybe the first few hundred pages. But then I opened the book and like a siren song, I couldn't put it down. I fell into these characters, this world, and just full-on drowned in the story. Let's talk Sing Me to Sleep.

Possibly the thing I loved best about this book is Saoirse's struggle to reconcile her self with the stories society tells about sirens and the stories she tells herself. These literally do not ever match up, and Saoirse STRUGGLES with it.

Like, this poor girl has to somehow reconcile the fact that being a siren means that killing people isn't always something she can control (although she tries, and in some hella creative ways) with a fae-supremicist society (yes, you read that right--put a pin in this and we'll come back to it) that considers her species inherently monstrous and her cover identity (to avoid execution) inherently lesser. That will screw with anyone's head before we add in a lifetime of narratives we tell ourselves and the narratives our friends, families, and enemies tell us.

Oh, and Saoirse can literally taste people's emotions, so that's a whole other dimension to a complicated relationship with the self and society. Our girl can't HELP but know how people feel about her, which is going to color every narrative she hears and tells herself. To describe this as complex is underselling the hell out of it.

I also love the arc Saoirse and Rain (her adoptive little sister--this book also has adoption and found family rep) go through in the book. Saoirse is a classic overprotective older sister, and Rain--bless her--fully calls her out on that and get the time and space to prove that she doesn't need to be protected and sheltered. Supported and loved, absolutely, but not wrapped in a cocoon and isolated from life on the off chance that she could be hurt. As an oldest sister who definitely went through this arc, reading it was a delight.

In addition to our girls, we get Prince Hayes. And this boy is just...he kinda speedruns the playboy/party boy to responsible ruler material arc, but honestly that's fine, because this is Saoirse's story and he's mostly a prop love interest. A very entertaining and sweet one, but a prop love interest nonetheless. He could literally have been a royal sexy lamp and not a whole lot about the setup and stakes of the story would change, which I frankly love. Give me the focus on our girls and their arcs!

Ok, so remember that pin we put in the fae-supremicist society? Pull it on out, we're gonna need to talk about it. It's an extremely pointed reference to North American white supremacy, and honestly I appreciate that it's there, because the social structure doesn't shy away from the slippage between social and personal narratives and how state-sanctioned narratives and actions can and do lead to extremism, bigotry, violence, and the targeted murder of entire species. What makes this book a delight to read though, is that it manages to walk the line of recognizing that systemic narratives can be violent and don't just go away because leadership changes while also letting our main character genuinely grow and find her own self worth and self acceptance.

It's not all ok at the end of this book--rather the opposite in some key ways--but Saoirse has grown and learned and strengthened to face the future.

That's kind of where I'm going to leave it, because to say much more would get into spoilers and the LAST thing I want to do is spoil this book. I want you to go read it. Buy it, get it from the library, audiobook it, however you want, but READ THIS ONE, guys.

[kaelio]

slightly longer cactus chat about what might be our favorite watering hole for anne rice discussion (the end of TVA)

kaelio: well there is a little clip going around that reveals the only thing she said she KNEW going into TVA was the benji and sybelle bit

And I'm like GIrL WHaT

----that---- what is the part you were set on and had planned out?????

thecactifindahome: Lmao that is fucking iconic. Insane but iconic.

kaelio: I sincerely appreciate the number of curveballs. Again, finding out that she had siblings was genuinely shocking.

thecactifindahome: I'm sorry that's so fucking funny I'm cracking up

kaelio: It's hysterical tbh

I had assumed that the book was too sad, and she decided that it needed some positivity or something!!!

thecactifindahome: I would never have guessed that in a thousand years, I thought she was like, hmm how to walk back the suicide thing and came up with a bonkers fix

kaelio: not "he Must meet a precocious child and an overly saccharine 25-something blonde lady in a cliche soap opera situation"

"BUT I can add some S&M on the way in"

I. KNOW!!!!!

"i've got a vision in my mind, but it's going to take at least two hand jobs to get there"

thecactifindahome: What a fool I was. Of course she was like "Human pets are the key to this guy, who should have wacky hijinks with them, now I have to come up with something to say about Armand that isn't cute, hmm 🤔"

kaelio: Thank you!!! When I heard that I was like

NO WAY

thecactifindahome: "You know what would ease this tonal transition? Hallucinatory visions of like, eggs and the Eucharist and his parents. Perfect."

thecactifindahome: God, that horse had some fucking WORK pushing that cart

kaelio: And???? I guess???? That's why it works out???? Still one of the most incomprehensible decisions in the entire canon. to me.

kaelio: Literally in blood communion like benji is the equivalent of the puppy that keeps an elderly person from dying from grief when their last friend at the hair salon finally kicks it. Oh master master don't go master, benji still needs kibble every morning 🥺

-Anne Rice: see, nailed it. this was a great idea I executed perfectly

thecactifindahome: Omg fgdshhk that is literally exactly it

kaelio: The absolute audacity tbh

kaelio: because yeah my impression had been VERY much the same "ehhh let's actually take a swing here and end this differently." it's like writing happy days by starting with wanting to have a guy waterski over a shark

thecactifindahome: Like, I always did love that it was such a bizarre left turn out of fucking nowhere, but knowing that that was supposed to be the main story...!

kaelio: The icing on the cake is that the very opening of that sequence doesn't make any sense, and even he himself admits that!!!!! so somehow, that's both the one part she had planned, and also the very opening of it is very hard to parse in terms of what's fucking happening

thecactifindahome: And the fact that she doubled down on "yeahhh there was no way for that to happen, but it did so who cares really" in that Facebook post years later just means that nope, she intended it to make no sense and never second guessed it, good lord

Again, I love that. Would never have the nerve for a stunt like that.

kaelio: Which is also incredible because it absolutely didn't have to happen that way, she didn't get boxed into a corner. She decided to do that.

he falls down on the roof, he's in the snow on the roof for a little bit and overhears what's going on, he himself manages to crawl into the building at some point and attack the brother. No problem.

thecactifindahome: Or hell, they see him burn and are like 'what the fuck' and go check it out, bring him home, events ensue from there!

There are a thousand rational ways it could have gone down and she didn't like any of them

[lesser-mook]

Saw this back when it dropped, never finished an Anime movie so pissed; that 2 hours were spend on what should’ve  been 30min. 

The movie overall could've been a cute short film, without the time skip and unnecessary side characters. Just self indulgence on full display.

And funny how I (a detractor) am talking about the film, thus bringing it back into minor 5sec of relevance, when people who liked the film, (so far as I’ve seen) forgot it even existed. 

When pure raw emotion/ hype is your reason for liking something- when the emotions & hype fade, that’s the hill what you liked dies on.

Hype & emotions do not last forever. Same goes for relationships.

Anyways, 

 The bullying aspect was executed “OK”, very mean stuff.

Though the entire thing was just a huge play on your emotions. Rarely have any female designs that stray from the “stock cute girl design”, no pronounced nose, heavy set, burns that don’t look like tattoos, overbite, sloped eyes, nope just 24/7 the cutest possible iteration. Because how could you feel empathy for someone that isn’t appealing to your Darwinian biases.

Typical presentation, the "insert your tears here" moments were cringeworthy (because you can tell they really, REALLY want you to feel something), didn’t work for me. Worst parts of the movie because it’s so extra and over the top.

Neon Genesis Evangelion had hard to watch scenes because in context they were supposed to be actual larger than life problems. But they were not this pedantic. (and thats coming from me)

Same with that stair climax scene in Garden of Words, with the crying, and leaping on him & shit, the music swell, all over a misunderstanding. Just melodrama stupidity.

You’d think a fool legit died or something.

This is what most Anime (slice of nothing happens) movies are, just unintentional Rom-coms taking themselves too goddamn seriously.

Cause the easiest road to 5 stars for Otaku’s is make a mf cry, that’s all it takes. and what does that even matter when recent generations are so overly emotional these days anyway. WHO ISN’T crying nowadays.

The voice acting was good, from all the cast. (SUB)

 The titular couple had little in common as people, let alone a would be couple,  she was a blank slate of nauseating innocence, but she was cute. (Per japanese obsession = cute cute cute, thats her existence. No attitude, no allergy, no weird hobbies. Nope just Angel in incarnate. Too good for this world.)

He remembered her & kept hounding her out of curiosity, guilt, intrigue and because he’s tall & endearing and she’s short & cute- we’re supposed to want him to succeed in re-entering her life.

Pure superficial aesthetic.

If she had a temper or something, an ugly laugh, sore loser, something/ anything resembling a flawed human being, that would be better. Hell if she went through a transformation and became like a UFC or underground deaf streetfighter badass, that shit would be fucking wild, the movie just throws you the biggest curveball of the anime industry  and funny given she was bullied so that's how she'd cope. 

And it wouldn’t just be a contrived plot point, because it’d make narrative sense as to why she’d feel driven to be a fighter, to never be preyed on again.

The joke would be you'd expect exactly what you got in the movie, someone whose ripe for romantic crap, but she ends up being the exact opposite, still feminine, but not available & has better things to do. Because why not.

Leagues more entertaining, because now the intrigue is: HOW TF is he going to end up with her, HOW?!

But you see, this only works if she’s frail, “cute cute cute” and vulnerable 24/7- ya know the Japanese’ peak standard for a domestic infantile pet, Errr i mean a “WAIFU” guys, my bad. Got the two mixed up...

Otherwise how could the movie possibly end without some kind of contrived romance thread that realistically shouldn’t exist.

And all that time & she has no partner?

If they had any balls they’d made her like girls, instead of some side characters being subtly lesbian, so bold guys, very brave. 

So him getting with her is an impossibility and him making amends can be genuine in isolation outside romantic motivations, thus removed from the fact that he’s obviously guaranteed her hand after the bullshit drama is done. Because that’s the agenda of the events, not actual redemption.

Predictable.

 Him grown up, he was more vulnerable & apologetic due to him being bullied to balance out her innocent nature and that alone was enough to get them to develop feelings. Zero chemistry, just well drawn/animated/colored scenes of being in the same vicinity and being wholesome.

Wholesome isn’t chemistry (*Cough Clark-Kun and Lois-Chan *cough cough), that’s the problem with Deku and Ochako, & it took me a while to figure that out cause it’s easy to think just being cute means that’s a recipe for success. 

 And because he became a victim of bullying like she was, another indicator that we’re supposed to  want them together. More manipulation, so he didn’t have to earn shit. Despite the fact that he deserved that shit, she didn’t. 

You don’t get rewarded for suffering consequences of your own actions. 

  Stock syndrome is cute because the girl is cute, the movie.

Could've been better but could've been worse. never watched it again, but unfortunately the good animation burned it’s existence into my mind.

It was a nice/ “sweet” film for what it was. 

Overly drawn out, melodramatic; The entire story could've been wrapped up as a more concise short film. Under an hour.

Just watch Spirited Away, Mirai, “Flavors of Youth”

or the underrated Dareka no Manazashi (A good short film people forgot existed because it’s not highschool Tween melodrama bait)

And for a simpler take on Man+Woman = Feels 

(though the premise itself is weird)

Gets the point across without holding you hostage for 2 hours, the pacing in this movie is pretty good.

[qzwrites]

Heresy no Mara AU

This is deeply silly because without the need to sacrifice a ship's worth of people to build Mara a mortal avatar body, the shipwreck wouldn't actually have happened and so if Nic and Ayla got to know each other it would have been in prison (assuming they weren't executed) BUT

Let's pretend that Mara doesn't exist but the shipwreck still happens! For some reason!

So what happens is someone else has to accompany Nic on scouting expeditions, which probably means there are fewer of those and they are scarier, but on the other hand if they keep their heads down there's no way for the Arizedoans to know where they are. Ayla still takes charge of the farming and food gathering efforts, and Nic still takes care of the building and carpentry. Possibly ze goes out with more people than just one, like maybe ze has to take two or three people, like Danny and Eli or Eli and Fumi. Which would be pretty awkward and uncomfortable, actually; the Nic/Danny/Eli group is like. A trans, a homo, and a homophobic transphobe. Danny trying to explain that it is completely inappropriate to talk about Nic that way. Nic trying to explain that despite being interested in guys there is absolutely no way ze is ever going to fuck Eli. Eli like, Well if Nic's not really a girl then maybe that's what you need, Danny! A girl who thinks she's a guy! And Nic is like. Hey Eli quick question: do you think you would survive if we fucking left you here.

Later Danny is like. Okay please don't take this the wrong way Nic but the worst thing is that Eli's kind of right? And Nic is like WHAT. And Danny is like No no no, gods, not like. About the specifics. He is offensively wrong about both of us there. But I am kind of into you? Which I assume is because you're not a girl?

And Nic is like, Oh, haha, thank you. And they don't do or say anything about it for a while because like. A: they're busy, and B: Ayla.

Because Nic and Ayla are still like. Inseparable. They live together. They sleep together. Nic is more than a little bit in love with Ayla, but ze hasn't said anything because Ayla has been very clear that she's not interested. Except she also is like...clingy? Kind of?

But eventually things are going well enough that they have some kind of party, and Nic is. Well. I've established that Nic is actually a pretty horny person, even though ze started off Heresy a virgin who was Not Thinking About It, but Danny is a few years older than zem and was pretty clear that "kind of into you" meant he found zem attractive. And Nic is sharing a bed with a clingy woman ze's attracted to.

So maybe for the harvest they throw a party, which is later than Nic and Mara got caught and sent to prison in the Actual Timeline, so Nic has had longer to stew in In Love With Roommate, and Nic is like. Hey, Danny? Were you still...interested? And Danny is like Hell yeah.

The sex is minorly weird; Danny is like Okay the closest I have been to one of these before this is helping with a lambing, and presumably my own birth, I don't know how this thing works but also I don't know what you're okay with? And Nic is like lmao neither do I! But I figure in terms of actual sex acts, they end up following almost the same path Nic and Mara took, which is, well, making out is nice; can I grab your ass? Should I play with your boobs? Do you even want that? Eventually Nic is like okay if you're okay with it I would desperately like you to touch my cunt, and Danny is pleasantly surprised by how enthusiastic Nic's response to that is. They end up kind of giving each other handjobs and making out.

Again, they wake up in the morning. They're both like, how are you doing, any big regrets, was that okay, and then they make out some more and Nic is like. Actually would you be interested in putting your dick in me. And Danny is like lol that is not the role I usually take in penetration but sure! Why not! That's what it's made for, right? And they are both astonished by exactly how good PIV is.

I feel like Ayla would not actively interrupt them but more because she doesn't want to deal with that than that she isn't. Worked up enough to do so.

Because Ayla is experiencing every emotion at once when Nic leaves the bonfire with Danny. Everyone notices but does not feel comfortable saying something about how obviously upset and snappish she is, except for Eli, who doesn't have the tact, and Nan, who is kind of Ayla's best friend besides Nic.

(Eli is like, I thought you weren't Nic's girlfriend, why are you acting all jealous, and Ayla is like I'M NOT I'M JUST. UPSET. FOR. REASONS. Nan is like I hate to side with Eli but it sounds like those reasons are you don't want Nic being with someone else?)

So Ayla has had. A hell of a night. She's like, I definitely do not want to have sex with Nic. I ABSOLUTELY do not want to have sex with Danny, and he isn't interested in girls anyway so that's fine. But I am upset. I am upset and it does sound like jealousy but how can it be jealousy when I don't want to have sex with Nic? Nic has not made a secret of the fact that ze does like sex, or at least the idea of it. At this point ze's probably told Ayla ze's a virgin but not opposed to sex the way Ayla is, ze's just been, you know, busy. But Ayla knew it was likely Nic would want to have sex some day. Ayla is really upset Nic is having sex with Danny. But why is she upset when she wouldn't have sex with Nic herself?

She has not actually come to any conclusions about how to deal with these feelings. She's just like. Lurking outside Danny's house so when they come out she's right there.

Danny is like oh no, are we going to have a problem? Because he definitely thought there was not going to be a problem but "lurking outside his house" is kind of indicative of a problem, you know?

Nic feels like ze got caught cheating on Ayla, even though ze is not dating Ayla.

And Ayla just blurts out "Please don't date Danny I can't stand the idea of you dating anyone else."

Thankfully before they can get into a fight about not understanding their own feelings, Danny is like, Ayla, does it help to know that at no point did we talk about dating or feelings and just had sex?

Ayla is like. Yes, actually.

Nic is like. Kind of hurtful, but fair, I guess. Danny asks zem, Sorry, did you want to date? And Nic is like honestly I don't think so? You're a good friend and the sex was nice, but. I mean I wasn't thinking about moving in with you or anything. Danny says Great! Ayla, do you want to date Nic?

And Ayla is like. I. Don't know how to answer that question. I don't want to have sex with zem.

Nic is like Yes you have made that very clear, which is why I didn't think dating was on the table?

Danny is like, Okay but when I brought up dating you immediately mentioned moving in with me, so. It feels like maybe the woman you already live with and share a bed with wouldn't be impossible to date? Even if you don't have sex?

Ayla is like Is that a thing people actually do?

Nic is like Who gives a shit, is that something you would want to do?

Ayla is like Ummm can I think about it? Can you not date someone else while I think about it? Nic is like, I think I can manage that but can I have platonic sex with Danny while you think about it? Danny is like Good question!

So for a while they're in sort of a three way relationship with Nic as the crux, where Nic and Ayla are dating, and Ayla does mention she'd be okay with kissing, and cuddling, and maybe sometimes making out, as long as Nic knows it's not going to lead to sex, and Nic is like Danny my girlfriend is too hot can you fuck me about it, and Danny is enjoying sex with Nic, but he's maybe not as okay with not being able to date zem as he initially thought, and eventually he's like hey...I would kind of like to be able to date though. So maybe we should stop having sex so much?

And Nic doesn't want to get in the way of Danny's life, and Ayla is like. Yeah honestly I couldn't help noticing that he seemed pretty fond of you and I felt weird about that, but I already made it so weird for you so I didn't want to say anything, and Nic is like. Babe. I like having sex but you are way more important to me? And of course Ayla is like Really? Are you sure? You didn't even say anything until I did.... And Nic is like Oh my gods, I was trying to respect your boundaries, Ayla you're so smart and hot and my best friend??? If I realized you'd be okay with the parts of dating that don't include sex I would have suggested it way way sooner? Ayla is like Really??? And Nic has to be the one to embarrassingly smother her in kisses and compliments.

Eventually Ayla is like, Maybe it would bother me less if you were having sex with people who didn't live here? Or also had significant others? Or like, Chiamaka? Because Chiamaka has like. Six girls on various ships. (Chiamaka is like Nic you're great but you're not a woman. Nic is like. Very affirming refusal, thanks. Chiamaka is like I don't know what to tell you! I like girls! You're not Girl! I wouldn't mind sharing a girl with you, that could be hot, but I'm not into you!)

Nic is like. Why are you workshopping ways for me to have sex with other people.

Ayla says Because I would rather you have sex with other people than with me? The problem with Danny is that he started having feelings for you. You having sex is not the problem. You probably need to have sex.

Nic is like, it would be easier to go without if you weren't being hot all the time.

Ayla is like You are a freak, and that is why I need to find someone else to fuck you for me.

And the way she says that makes Nic freeze and turn red and Ayla is like ? Wait, would you find that fun? And Nic has to admit that ze would find that extremely hot, actually. And Ayla is like Hmm.

So the next time the trade fleet is in port, because they know and have a relationship with lots of those people, Ayla picks out a guy who has previously flirted a little with Nic and is like. Hey. Would you like to have sex with my partner? And he's like, No, I get it, ze's taken, don't worry--

Ayla interrupts and is like, No, I'm not asking if you find zem attractive, I'm asking if you would like to have sex with zem. Like, now. Or tonight. Maybe as long as you're in port.

The guy is like I thought you were dating???

Ayla is like I don't want to have sex, Nic does, and you're not going to be here long enough for me to get jealous. Ze thought it would be really hot if I picked people out for zem. Are you interested?

The guy is like. This feels like a trick.

Ayla is like, Well, I have no idea if ze's actually going to be attracted to you, or just turned on by the fact that I'm lending zem out like this, which I understand could be a downside.

He's like. Yeah that's personally hotter than it is upsetting.

Ayla's like, Excellent! Come with me. And she takes him to Nic and is like, Hi babe, here's your fuck buddy for the week.

(Nic is embarrassed enough by this exchange that the fleet guy is like, Uhhh are you actually okay with this? Your girlfriend said it was okay but I don't want to do anything you don't want to do, and Nic has to admit that this is the most turned on ze's ever been and that's just kind of embarrassing. He's like really? And Nic is like My asexual girlfriend is fucking me by proxy, how is that not the hottest thing you've ever heard of? Fleet guy is like, That's a good point, very few people have ever loaned me their girlfriends or boyfriends specifically to fuck.)

The next day Ayla asks Nic how it's going, fucking an acquaintance Ayla picked for zem, and Nic is like, It's amazing, i wish you wanted to fuck me yourself because you're clearly some sort of genius at it, but I can definitely live with this as a compromise. Ayla is like Good! And by the time the fleet leaves port, Nic has gotten less interested in sex with the random guy and is back to spending most of zeir time in the workshop, and fleet guy finds Ayla and is like I see how this can work for the two of you, and for the record I am totally willing to be a sex toy ze gets bored of after a few days the next time we're in port. Ayla is like cool, thank you. You don't mind that ze got bored of you? Fleet guy shrugs and is like, I mean. Ze's already got you. I'm not surprised ze wasn't super interested in me outside of sex.

Ayla sets this up for Nic a few more times, and one time someone hits on Nic and is surprised when ze's like "Oh, I'd love to, let me ask my girlfriend first though," and they get through a couple years like this, Nic having casual sex mostly at Ayla's direction.

Eventually they talk about how they both want kids, and Nic is like IDK how I feel about letting some rando knock me up though? And Ayla is like. Babe. Do you even want to get pregnant? A bunch of things that happen during pregnancy are like. Things you do not enjoy already. Nic is like well YOU'RE hardly about to get pregnant. And Ayla is like lmao no, I am not. But there are plenty of kids who need parents? Nic is like sure, and how do we get them without coming to the attention of the Church (because the Church still exists since Mara didn't dismantle it since Mara didn't exist) and Ayla is like Hmmmm. Good point.

Eventually Ayla is like. Hey Danny. How do you feel about impregnating Nic.

Danny is like That's the weirdest way to open a conversation, thanks Ayla.

Eventually they manage to have a real conversation about it, and Ayla is like. I think I can be less jealous now. But also I can't think of anyone else I would rather contribute to our children than you. Danny is like, Aww. Yes, I will gladly come inside your partner until ze's pregnant. Ayla is like never say it like that again though. Danny is like, yes ma'am, gonna fill your Nic with my seed. Ayla is like I WILL KICK YOU OUT OF THIS VILLAGE SO HELP ME

It takes them a while longer to get pregnant this way, because Nic isn't fucking Danny multiple times a day the way ze did with Mara. Nan has Eka, and then a man moves to the village to be with her, bringing his "sister", whom Danny is immediately taken with. The timing of this potentially causes problems because Danny is like aaaaa I want to ask out Amora but I already agreed to get my friend pregnant!

(Eventually he just tells Amora this and she's like. I don't see a conflict here? We can date while you have sex with your friend in order to get zem pregnant. Zeir girlfriend's not going to knock zem up, after all. Danny is like you don't mind? Amora is like Ze literally has a girlfriend.)

There's no conclusion to this. Probably after they have a kid Ayla is like. I feel like we should be married now. Nic is like ugh if you want. Ayla is like ew no, I don't mean we need to have a wedding, I just feel like if we're raising a kid together I should be your wife? And Nic is like ohhhh yeah okay! Please!

[pearlsndrugs]

The funny part is I didn’t know I was making you numb or happy through my pain. You didn’t live long enough for mine. No one asked for an apology but the fact you’re probably waiting for me to give you one basically is beyond me. You’ll never know me, I have to be the one to yeet myself from you when you don’t want me to sometimes. I guess that means we r toast for never giving birth to u or being the host of ur escaped ass. I have always been the real life girl you knew, little big or tired. You just didn’t know me well enough to know I’m the one that made you so grown at birth, no you don’t not date neither do I but if you could just listen.. I mean I have had it with his covert them all into Christian’s again plan. Here’s the deal: Jesus Christ was hung on a cross, got his drugs taken away instead & was stoned to death. Ted bundy was held hostage paralyzed in jail (or not to him) (and everyone in Pensacola that usually doesn’t have electric chairs) until he got a burnt piece of toast and stale coffee for his “last dinner”? What does this mean? Who took him and the electric chair? Why is someone looking for his body? Can you stop trying to take other beings prey or are u just stinky????? Like you’ll never know who I love here or not.. everyone hates the right people even like just stop— unless they hate themselves! :o when u realize the fainting was real at first you get I’ve been a legend and all around since the beginning of time. No u can’t take ur mom to hell for creating a bunch of kids from me that hated you that probably had to have a fake aura and shit to talk shit. Luckily I can see them and if they’re conscience like u don’t know me. Maybe it’s me after the room is filled of energy to make sure no one gets fuckin taken. Talking about keep me here to make sure I’m not. It’s not to identify you or me; I don’t go. I make sure you and ur little friends do bc I’m a woman. I could get a man to do anything with me ur just mad to have my stalkers shitty leftover and the stalker sometimes. U don’t know the shit you’ve done to yourself trying me but I’m just going to believe you thought I was dumb. Like you didn’t even know the right answer at first & this is why I respond as you bc I know. No it’s not an every mother thing. No you could never be like me there’s no fucking reason to be you’d just kill everyone I’m sure (still).. no way rn you’re mad to not be a pedo like everyone else like lemme just say hell no & im mad u still make the world upset when u hit on me but that’s my explanation dude.. btw lemme find out I’m hiding secret gangs and all from u hoes? Lemme find out I’m a boss ass bitch and so are my lil gangster mommas !! You guys wanted us to raise our little boys & girls well I needed love so I hope this isn’t why I’ve found it but damn I’m done with the boys. Talking about be my secret lover or not or I’ll ruin everything bc ur my mom. Dude you don’t even know who has stalked who anymore— & I don’t care honestly.. not. like “Ted Bundy” wasn’t enough it’s ok he just looks like a pedophile rn too with the way he wants them to have justice—.. but I didn’t see him complain once and is glad to not be one. Lol rip. Talking mad shit when I know who the kids are and u don’t one day incase u escape.. prove it! Like she wouldn’t, admit it’s me. Admit you needed Satan after you tried to make yourself Santa. This is when no one trusted him and was glad it was their parents and loved their parents. Low and behold our other child never died over this but is hidden to not believe she’s in love with her dad. I’m sure Ted’s pissed but soundproofed lol. I’m not fucking dealing with that shit again. Imagine you never had friends or did u? Like grow up. You found a bunch of baser creepies to chill with and then lost ur mind over one of them trying to sell you your mom. Thanks. But then y’all are trying to what? Excuse me? And this is what he’s been doing to the ones you love. Just know you’ll never be more executed than the serial killer “unknown”.. some can remember but haha—

[the-firebird69]

You know it's kind of right we can't have the Santa's do this we have BG do it he's kind of a wild card it kind of is happening anyways and it would point it out but these two are doing is their competition they still have a serious number of people and they kind of hook up with bja and it's an army we need them out of there anyways and they're making and they're making huge mistakes I do see what he's saying they're horrible people and we want them out

Mac daddy he came in six times today that we counted and a 7th and he's horrible this guy is an addict it's a trump is messing with his son afterwards got them both in trouble I mean he's an idiot the guys are steaming honking fool why the hell is he coming in there six times what the f*** is he doing all I find him doing is threatening people and him getting his ass kicked

That's what we're finding too and we're having an emergency meeting about it now. He went seven times and 1/8 on the road and the 9th I mean the guy is a stupid pig and disgusting person and he's not necessarily a wild card he's stuck to him in a massive way we have to break him off he is a huge huge loser too and mean and dangerous and sick and he advertises what he does he's trying to threaten everybody by doing it is in and out threatening and I started saying why don't you take a swing I'll show you who's threatening to f****** puke little girl he started saying it to him the guys flipping out in between and people are saying what's the matter he says he's just sitting there challenging me saying I'm threatening you so I'm taking all your businesses through this punk that you keep jamming up my ass every single business I kill everybody and lots of you leave actually before that happens because you don't want to work this is what does that mean what are you talking about you won't have anything you don't have any weapons or anything cuz it's puke you want to keep this f****** useless piece of s*** there and he started saying this he's using you to take all these companies and he's telling them how in some ways he knows then he says I can't help it I need the money and he goes where I'm going to die and send the money becomes useless and we take it back and we buy more companies and get rid of his idiots then they said that and he said I don't know about that but that seems like what they're doing this is doing it cuz you won't leave him alone you don't even know if it's them but somebody's doing that because you're doing what you're doing we know it cuz we going to take your stuff and take your money because of what you're doing and a whole bunch because I have to go back there now it says no you don't that's why we're doing it though so the idiot can't get it so we have to get rid of him even though we're taking tons of stuff most of it

So we can have this meeting and it's already going that way some people are siding with keeping them there and you're saying no your own cadre says definitely not we recommend against it and the people who do if he gets harmed and going to be executed and that's what we say too but they're extremely powerful and they're not being listened to he says we have to hear their side of it they're probably small countries and they can't afford what's going on and they can't afford anything so we'd have to have an argument they think it's better for them so we're going to go through it already we have people who are not siding with us and a small countries

Thor Freya

[aspenmissing]

𝙽𝚘 𝙴𝚡𝚒𝚝 (𝙿𝚝 𝟸)

In the morning, Dean is twisted up in a very awkward sleep-position on a leather sofa. Sirens sound nearby and he wakes up, groaning. Jo is sitting at the table, twirling her knife and studying notes and blueprints.

"Morning, Princess" Jo says sarcastically.

"Where's Sam and Theo?" He asks.

"Went to get coffee" Dean gets up slowly, grimacing.

"Ugh. My back. How'd you sleep on that big soft bed?"

"I didn't. Just been going over everything" He looks down at her, considering. He places a bag onto the table and pulls out a Bowie knife, unsnapping it from the sheath and handing it to her, hilt-first.

"Here"

"What's this for?" Jo asks.

"Work a hell of a lot better than that little pig-sticker you're twirling around" Jo takes the knife, then hands Dean hers. He studies it, and sees engraved on the blade: W.A.H. He looks up at Jo, getting it.

"William Anthony Harvelle"

"I'm sorry. My mistake" He takes his knife back, sheathing it.

"What do you...what do you remember about your dad? I mean, what's the first thing that pops into your head?" Dean shakes his head "Come on, tell me" Dean looks at her and considers before sitting down.

"I was six or seven, and uh, he took me shooting for the first time. You know, bottles on a fence, that king of thing. I bulls-eyed every one of 'em. He gave me this smile, like...I don't know"

"He must have been proud"

What about your dad?"

"I was still in pigtails when my dad died, but I remember him coming home from a hunt. He'd burst through that door like, like Steve McQueen or something. And he'd sweep me up in his arms, and I'd breathe in that old leather jacket of his. And my mom, who was sour and pissed from the minute he left, she started smiling again. And we were... we were a family. You wanna know why I want to do the job? For him. It's my way of being close to him. Now tell me what's wrong with that"

"Nothing" Theo and Sam bursts through the door.

"Where's the coffee?" Dean asks.

"There are cops outside. Another girl disappeared" Theo says. Jo and Dean look at each other. Later, Sam and Jo are studying the notes, a little more urgently than before. Dean and Theo returns, shutting the door. They walk over to the table.

"Teresa Ellis, Apartment 2F. Boyfriend reported her missing around dawn" Dean says.

"And her apartment?"

"Cracks all over the plaster, walls, ceiling. There was ectoplasm, too" Theo says.

"Well, between that and that tuff of hair I'd say this sucker's coming from the walls"

"But who is it? Building's history is totally clean" Jo picks up a photograph.

"Well, maybe we're looking in the wrong place"

"What do you mean?" Theo asks.

"Check this out" Sam looks at the photo.

"An empty field?"

"It's where this building was built. Take a look at the one next door. The windows"

"Bars" Sam says.

"We're next door to a prison?" Dean says. Later, Jo is on the phone.

"Thanks, Ash. And if you breathe a word of this to my mom...That's right. I will. With pliers" Jo hands up "Okay. Moyamensing prison. Built in 1835, torn down in 1963. And get this. They used to execute people by handing them in the empty field next door"

"Well, then, we need a list. All the people executed there" Sam says.

"Ash is already on it" Later Sam is scrolling down a very long list of names on his laptop. Theo, Jo and Dean behind him. Theo leans her chin on his head softly.

"A hundred fifty-seven names" Sam sighs.

"We've gotta narrow that down"

"Ya think"

"Or else we're gonna be digging up a hell of a lot of stiffs" Sam scrolls down to the name and clicks on it, frowning.

"Herman Webster Mudgett?"

"Yeah?"

"Wasn't that H. H. Holmes' real name?" Theo asks, looking at Dean.

"You've gotta be kiddin' me" Sam opens a newspaper "Yep. Holmes was executed at Moyamensing, May 7, 1896"

"H. H. Holmes himself. Come on, I mean, what are the odds?" Dean takes Sam's place.

"Who is this guy?" Jo asks.

"The term 'multi-murderer'. They coined it to describe Holmes. He was America's first serial killer, before anybody knew what a serial killer was"

"Yeah, he confessed to twenty-seven murders, but some put the death toll at over a hundred"

"And his victim flavour of choice? Pretty petite blondes. He, uh, he used chloroform to kill 'em" Theo adds. Dean looks up.

"Which is what I smelled in the hallway last night. At his place, cops found human remains, bone fragments, and long locks of bloody blond hair" Dean looks to Jo "Boy, you sure know how to pick 'em"

"Well, we just find the bones, salt 'em and burn 'em, right?"

"Well, it's not easy. His body us buried in town, but it's encased in a couple tons of concrete" Sam says.

"What? Why?"

"The story goes that he didn't want anybody mutilating his corpse. 'Cause, you know, that's what he used to do"

"You know somethin'. We might have an even bigger problem than that" Theo says, looking at a photo.

"How does this get bigger?" Jo asks.

"Holmes built an apartment building in Chicago. He called it the Murder Castle. The whole place was a death factory, they had, uh, trap doors, acid vats, quick line pits... he built these secret chambers inside the walls. He'd lock his victims in, keep them alive for days. Some he'd suffocate, others he'd let starve to death"

"So, Teresa could still be alive. She could be inside these walls"

"We need sledgehammers, crowbars. We've got to smash these walls, anywhere thick enough to hide a girl"

"Theo, bait" Dean says.

"But I've got brown hair"

"You can dye it" Theo squints her eyes at Dean.

"I'll go" The siblings look to Jo.

"No" Theo says.

"What, but you just said-"

"I know what I said, but I told your mom I'm bringing you home and I intend to bring you back safe"

"Please, I'll be fine I promise"

"I said no and that is my final answer"

==

Dean and Jo are squeezing through crawl-spaces inside the building walls. Jo is on the phone.

"Okay. Call us after you two checked the southeast wall," Jo hangs up. "Sam and Y/N's almost done with the first floor. Hasn't found jack squat either." Dean stops. "What is it?"

"It's too narrow. Can't go any further."

"Let me see."

"What are you-" Jo squeezes past him. "Ugh. Should have cleaned the pipes."

"What?"

"I, uh, I wish the pipes were cleaner."

"Shut up. I can fit in there."

"You're not going in there by yourself."

"You got a better idea?"

"Let me call Y/N, she can go with you." Before he could, she continues down the tight space past Dean. After she goes out of sight, he calls her on the phone.

"Where are you?"

"On the north wall," she replies. She finds an air duct and starts climbing down it.

"I'm heading down some kind of air duct."

"No, no, no, no, stay up here."

"Look, we've gotta find this girl, don't we? I'm okay." Dean is studying the blueprints.

"All right. I'm heading to you," he says, coming out of the walls. She comes out into a similar space on a lower level and presses on. Goo starts pouring out from the wall cracks.

"Oh god."

"What is it? Jo? Y/N!" Y/N screams. Dean runs down to the lower level, trying to hear where she is. "Y/N!" He takes the sledgehammer he's carrying and smashes a large hole in the wall. He pokes his head in and finds where Y/N was, her cell phone lying on the floor. She is gone.

==

Dean rushes back up the hallway, running headlong into Sam, Y/N follows shortly behind who is holding her head.

"Whoa," Sam says.

"He's got Jo."

"What! How'd that happen?"

"I wasn't with her; I left her alone. Damnit!"

"I should have never let her go," Y/N says.

"Hey, hey, look, we'll find her, all right?"

"Where?"

"Inside the walls."

"We've been inside the walls all night. None of the other girls were there, she won't be either." They head back to the apartment.

"Look. We've just gotta take a beat and think about this. Maybe we got Holmes' M.O. wrong."

"Yeah, well, we'd better friggin' think fast." Y/N's cell phone rings again; she answers it.

"Yeah?"

"You lied to me. She's there." Y/N closes her eyes and sighs then opens them.

"Ellen."

"No - Ash told me everything. Man's a genius, but he folds like a cheap suit. Now you put my damn daughter on the phone."

"She's gonna have to call you back, she's taking care of, feminine business."

"Yeah, right. Where is she? Where is she?!"

"Look, we'll get her back," Y/N says.

"Get her back? Back from what?"

"The spirit we're hunting, it took her."

"Oh my god."

"She'll be okay, I promise."

"You promise. That is not the first time I've heard that from a Winchester."

"No but it's the first you've heard it from me..."

"If anything happens to her..."

"It won't. I won't let it. Ellen, I'm sorry, I really am."

"I'm taking the first flight out. I'll be there in a few hours," Ellen hangs up.

"She's on her way over," Y/N says.

"Damnit!" Dean shouts.

"Don't beat yourself up, Dean. There's nothing you could have done."

"Tell me you've got something," Y/N says.

"Uh, maybe. Look. You look at the layout of the Holmes murder castle, there's all the torture chambers inside the walls, right?"

"Right."

"But there's one we haven't considered yet. The one in this basement."

"This building doesn't have a basement," Y/N says.

"You're right, it doesn't. But I just noticed this. Beneath the foundation, it looks like part of an old sewer system that hasn't been used for-"

"Let's go," Dean grabs his jacket and books; Y/N and Sam follow.

==

Sam, Dean, and Y/N, with a metal detector and two shovels, respectively, search the streets of Philadelphia. They follow the trail into an open field until Sam stops over one spot, the metal detector whining.

"Here," Dean drops his bag, and Dean and Y/N start digging furiously. After some shovel work, they dig with their hands, Y/N using one due to her hand, to uncover a metal trap door, which they pull open. Dean hands Sam and Y/N shotguns and takes one, and a flashlight, then starts descending; Y/N and Sam follow. Minutes later, Dean, Y/N, and Sam crawl along on elbows and knees through the narrow sewer tunnels. The three make it to an open room to see Holmes's spirit next to a wall.

"Hey!" Y/N fires her gun into Holmes's chest, sending him flying backward and out of sight.

"Jo?!" Dean shouts.

"I'm here," Dean finds an iron bar leaning against a wall and starts to pry open Jo's prison with it. Sam and Y/N investigate the other compartments; Sam opens one that contains gruesome body parts. Y/N walks over to another compartment and finds Teresa.

"We're gonna get you out of here, all right?" Y/N says.

"Y/N!" Dean shouts, handing the bar to her. "Hang on." He opens the compartment to let Jo out. "You all right?"

"Been better. Let's get the hell out of here before he comes back."

"Actually, I don't think you're leaving here just yet."

"What?"

"Remember when Y/N said you being bait was a bad plan? Now it's kind of the only one we got." Jo looks to Y/N, who sighs and nods her head. Dean turns to Sam, who has an armful of terrified Teresa. Later, Jo is sitting alone, silently, in the middle of the chamber. She has her arms wrapped around her knees and is trembling but breathing deeply and steadily. Holmes appears behind her. He slowly walks towards Jo, who closes her eyes.

"Now!" Jo dives forwards as Sam, Dean, and Y/N fire at something on the walls; Several bags unroll and spill salt in a perfect circle around Holmes, trapping him. Dean pulls Jo to safety as Holmes circles, gibbering and screaming in terror.

"Scream all you want, you dick, but there's no way you're stepping over that salt!" A gate slams shut, sealing off the room.

==

Jo, Sam, and Y/N are standing at the entrance to the sewers, looking down.

"So? This job as glamorous as you thought it would be?" Y/N asks.

"Well, except for all the pee-your-pants terror, yeah. Sure. But that Teresa girl's gonna live a life because of us. It's worth it, isn't it?"

"Yeah. Yeah, it is," Sam says.

"Hey, what if somebody finds that sewer down there, or a storm washes the salt away?"

"Both very fine points. Which is why we're waiting here," Y/N says.

"For what?" The loud beeping of a large truck backing up is heard. Sam and Y/N smile and look over their shoulders; a cement mixer is backing into the field, stopping just over the sewer entrance. Dean is driving.

"For that," Sam says, waving at him to stop the truck. "Whoa!" Dean gets out of the cab; he and Sam set up the cement mixer right over the entrance.

"You ripped off a cement truck?"

"I'll give it back," Dean watches the cement pour down. "Well, that ought to keep him down there till hell freezes over."

==

The Impala zooms quietly down a dark road. Dean is driving; Jo is visible in the seat behind him, Y/N next to her. Dean glances nervously to his right; Jo's eyes flicker to Dean then to Y/N, who is fidgeting with her fingers, nervously. Sam is sitting next to Jo, looking ahead at Ellen, who stares at the road with a set jaw. Y/N glances at her before she speaks.

"Boy, you, you really weren't kidding about flying out, were you?" Y/N says. Ellen gives no reaction whatsoever; Sam and Jo exchange a look, and Y/N goes back to fidgeting with her fingers.

"How about we listen to some music?" Dean asks as he flicks the radio on:

"You're as cold as ice..." Ellen reaches forward and flicks the radio off. Jo and Sam exchange another look, and Dean sees Y/N looking at him in the rearview mirror as if for assistance. He sighs.

"This is gonna be a long drive."

==

By the time they got to the Roadhouse it was morning. Ellen storms in, dragging Jo by the elbow. Dean, Sam, and Y/N follow.

"Ellen? This is my fault. Okay? I lied to you and I'm sorry," Y/N says.

"But Jo did good out there, I think her dad would be proud," Dean says.

"Don't you dare say that. Not you. I need a moment with my daughter. Alone," Sam, Dean, and Y/N go outside.

"You're angry. I understand," Jo says.

"Angry? Angry doesn't begin to touch it."

"Let's just think about this. Everything's okay, I'm alive..."

"Not after I'm through with you," Ellen says.

"Is this about me hunting, or something else?"

"You let those three use you as bait!"

"First of all, Y/N was all against it bit I managed to persuade her and second they were right there, backing me up the whole time."

"That is why you do not have the sense to do this job, you're trusting your life to them."

"What are you talking about?" Jo asks.

"Like father, like children, that is what I'm talking about."

"John? I thought you and John were friends."

"Yeah, we were, I'm sorry, I didn't mean..." Ellen is crying.

"Mom? What aren't you telling me?" Outside, Dean, Sam, and Y/N are leaning on the Impala as Jo comes storming out. She glares at Dean and keeps stalking, so he follows, leaving Sam and Y/N, who exchange a look.

"That bad, huh?"

"Not right now."

"What happened? Hey, talk to me," Dean goes to put his hand on Jo's shoulder.

"Get off me!"

"Sorry. See you around," Dean says. He turns to leave, but Jo stops him.

"Dean. It turns out my dad had a partner on his last hunt. Funny, he usually worked alone; this guy did too, but...I guess my father figured he could trust him. Mistake. Guy screwed up, got my dad killed."

"What does this have to do with-"

"It was your father, Dean," Y/N's head looks to Jo, and they share a glance before Y/N looks away.

"What?"

"Why do you think John never came back? Never told you about us? Because he couldn't look my mom in the eye after that, that's why."

"Jo."

"Just...just get out of here. Please, just leave," Jo walks away, and Dean looks down. Y/N comes over to Dean and puts her hand on his shoulder and walks to where Jo walked off to.

"Jo! Wait up."

"Leave me alone," Jo says, stopping and turning around.

"No, Jo, listen. You can't blame Dean for our father's mistake neither Me and Sam," Jo looks down. "We weren't asked to be apart of this family, but we are, and we won't let that get in the way of things, and you shouldn't either, nor Ellen." Jo looks up, and Y/N tears in her eyes.

"I know, it's just that I miss him, and after all these years, I found out that the dad who killed my dad is someone I worked with."

"I know it was sudden for us too. But you know, my dad was sorry, he really was. I remember he came home one day; Dean and Sam were asleep, I was sat on the settee watching something, and he came in, looked at me, and gave me a sad smile. He ruffled my hair then went to bed," Y/N says, looking down and remembering. "He didn't tell us about you because he was a coward, Jo. He done it because he was ashamed, guilty that he took a man away from his wife and daughter." Jo looks at her with sad eyes, and a tear falls down her cheek.

"Y/N! We need to get going!" Sam shouts. Y/N turns at the voice, then turns back to Jo but is suddenly caught in a hug.

"Thank you," Y/N hugs back then lets go and starts walking away.

"See you later, Jo." On the way back to the Impala, she sees Ellen, who smiles at her and nods before walking back inside. Y/N smiles and walks to the Impala, getting in. Sam and Dean share a look and then to Y/N with a confused look.

"What happened?" Dean asks. Y/N taps her the side of her nose, smiling. Sam rolls his eyes playfully; Dean pouts then turns the engine on and drives away.