#i manage 4 youngins

[akayna]

Okay, I'm know not that old, but there are moments where I get a glimmer of what it's like to feel old.

Thursday is a public holiday in Germany, and today I was asked about it by one of my direct reports (who got to spend her 25th birthday this past May on a work trip with me, her boss, with whom she wouldn't stop talking about how 'crazy it was that she already 25').

"What do you think 'German Unity Day' is?"

And I said, "Well, I'd wager it's to celebrate the reunification of Germany after the removal of the Berlin Wall."

So she googled it and went, "Okaaaay, look at you, miss history buff."

Taken aback, I blinked and went, "Girl, I was alive for that..."

[the-owl-tree]

Actually sorry *pulls over chalkboard* I think warriors should've leaned into the idea of how in a, for a lack of a better word, warrior culture where strength is valued and being a leader of your culture is considered the most honorable thing you can do how living up to your parents legacy is a pressure to conform to that culture.

Arc one sets it up. Fire is new to the clan, he questions the culture, he manages to break some standards, but in the end he is assimilated. This is paralleled by Tiger, who was raised in the clans culture and is the most extreme of "I must be strong I must be a leader like my father and forefather before me".

Arc 2 sets up the consequences of this culture. Bramble feels ostracized from his clan because no matter how hard he tries to be the strong, noble warrior, he always has that shadow of his father looming over him. Meanwhile Hawkfrost shows up put of seemingly nowhere in RiverClan and is the paragon of clan culture virtues: he's a strong, driven warrior who strives to lead his clan. (Not to mention Tawny and Moth, who have both rejected the Tiger legacy and made a bame for themselves). I think for the next part of this what is now an au to work, Bramble also has to reject the Tiger legacy and the trappings of clan culture in general post-fox trap, ultimately stepping down from his deputy position and most warrior duties. In a way, he ends up a kitsitter, healer assistant, and at times advisor.

Arc 3 illustrates how clan culture treats those who reject it, such as Bramble. The 3 are still considered Bramble and Squilfs kits, but Bramble is their primary caretaker and Squilf is more their mother in name. They might also be each others beards. The 3 love Bramble, but see the way the clans treat him for breaking out of clan culture and strive to prove themselves more "worthy" than him. Lion attempts this by being the most battle ready and vicious warrior he can. Jay strives to prove to the clans that a blind cat can be a warrior (and ultimately, realizes that he can find joy in being a healer). Poor Holly, however, falls for the same pitfall that once tempted her father and uncle. She craves power, desires to prove that she can be the perfect warrior, deputy, and leader. When she discovers the truth of her parentage, it breaks her. She's no longer just the daughter of a craven, weak warrior (in her eyes), but now she's the daughter of a half clan, healer love affair. It breaks her, so she reveals the horrid truth and winds up in the tunnels, presumed dead. Her family, (and a pregnant Cinderheart), retreat into themselves and find solace in each other.

Arc 4 finishes up the idea of having to live up to your parents legacy (somehow). Ivy and Dove are born to Cinder and a presumed dead Holly. At this point ThunderClan is daddy issues central. Lion and Jay have a better relationship with Bramble (who did know), but there's still some tension. Following Holly's "death", the Firekin kinda... lost faith. Firestar still needs to hold up the thunderclan ideal, but Sand, their kids, and Bramble Lion and Jay are less inspired to hold up the clan culture ideal and more interested in the softer aspects: caring for their Clan, teaching the youngins, so on and so forth. Dove is more willing to follow this new ideal. Yes, she can be vicious and rude and is still dangerous, but she spent a lot of time with Grandpa Bramble and Uncle Lion and they've rubbed off on her. Ivy was raised as such too and they had the save effect, but apprenticeship changed that. Firestar wanted Bramble to mentor one of them, but he refused, suggesting Lion instead. Lion did mentor Dove, but Ivy ended up with the more traditionalist Thornclaw. This only worsened the influence of Hawk in the dark forest. I'm not entirely sure how this ends, but I know there needs to be some kind of reckoning with holly and her kids, and I think a thunderclan new wave culture exodus ft Moth, Breeze and Nightcloud. I started this ask at like 9:50 and it's 1:15

this RULES!!!!!!!! i'm absolutely eating up cinderholly! dove & ivy

this makes me crave more sort of emphasis on lineage, like lords underneath the king. the books already put emphasis on it but it would be cool if these lineages had power or at least social clout attached to them. they try to make it seem like they do but they never really...actually do it lol very NEAT au i am very interested :3

[a-iya]

Sooo what are your favorite characters? (*・ω・)ﾉ

omg!! i'm so sorry it literally takes like 4 business days for me to reply to stuff x_x favorite characters like of all time? this is an impossible question to answer 😩

i have too many and one simply cannot choose just one character from any show to pick as a favorite ugh. i guess i can start with the main shows my blog consists of/the shows that have a lot of different kinds of characters (each one has at least 4 omg 😭)

demon slayer

rengoku (the literal love of my life, the one who started it all, the main reason i got into anime, the cure to my depression at one point?? i get emotional just thinking about him sometimes. i go back and listen to the mugen train soundtrack just to hurt my own feelings)

shinobu (🦋 [can't add my blog tag for her cause it's an emoji but she has some of the prettiest fanart ever], gorgeous character design, color scheme, overall aesthetic, classy. she deserved more out of her life than being in a constant state of anger 😭)

inosuke (i have no tag for him but he is my fav from the main squad. he is chaotic as hell and caveman-ish in the most hilarious ways. his pretty face makes it that much more ironic)

nezuko (the cutest baddie ever. so pretty. protective of tanjiro and comrades. how can you not love her)

zenitsu (his cowardice is actually really relatable. his expressions are sooo funny in the show they've got to be one of the best)

obamitsu (i love them so much individually, i love them so much together, i literally love them so much. literally black cat and golden retriever energy in the best ways. the last episode with iguro's jealousy was so funny and such a treat omg)

jujutsu kaisen

the main trio's dynamic (i enjoy them all as individuals, but when they're together the silly antics and the chaos that ensues is so dear to me. gege was so wrong for what he did to each of them. if i ever see him it's on sight)

nanami (my man, her man, everyone and their mom's man...! literally impossible to not like him. the miserable corporate life is just so relatable. but the fact that he's still such a good man at the end of the day and wants to protect the children ;-; WHERE are the men like him irl 😭 i will never forgive gege for what he did to him,,, gege,.., when i cATcH you gege.,.,..)

ino (my ABSOLUTE FAV underrated man?? his skater boy aesthetic makes me wEAK!! and correct me if i'm wrong but he just gives off major himbo energy. he's such a puppy, i love him so much 🥺 also fun fact i met his VA, who also voices tanaka from haikyuu [i don't think i will ever shut up about this])

gojo (for obvious reasons. handsome, funny, good at everything. at the same time he cares so much for the youngins it's really touching. but also he's just so unserious about everything i wish i had even an ounce of his confidence fr. an uncontested king, he deserved better 😭)

geto (oh geto (be forewarned: only depression posts in this tag). it hurt me so bad to see his descent into madness. i think his story and especially his relationship with gojo is beautifully written. the visual symbolism is also heavenly in the most melancholic way. he reminds me a lot of eren from aot. i felt his exhaustion and hopelessness from the depths of my soul. i think about rengoku when i want to be hurt in a good(ish?) way, but geto is my go-to when i'm in the mood for straight depression)

yuta (a blorbo if I've ever seen one. so precious. very sad about his current state. if gege kills him off there will be no one left 😭)

choso (normally i don't care for emo boys but he's so 'i am onii-chan,' it's endearing and also kind of funny. other than that he's really quiet for the most part but also like responsible and cares a lot about people he's close to. i ship him and yuki. i remember finding out about his death when i'd first logged into tumblr one day and i was devastated. how does gege manage to kill everyone 😭🤡)

my hero academia

shoto (see tag: SHOTOOOOO. my favorite boy. i love how the angst just completely left his body after deku forced him through his inner turmoil during the sports festival. competent. obviously one of bones' favorites given he's always drawn so handsomely)

kaminari (he is so dumb and i love him for it. good vibes only and even if a bit perverted, still super respectful and funny. bones always animates him with the most hilarious expressions. love him and jiro. also love him and mina as last in the class. and him and kirishima for being able to handle bakugo's difficult personality in stride!! he is so stupid and happy and i love him omg)

kirishima (a himbo!! the friendliest and most encouraging jock ever. i would've appreciated if i had a presence like him around when i was in high school. so manly!! i love how he just gets along with everyone. him and tetsutetsu are such an iconic duo. i also love how silly him and kaminari are [and sometimes bakugo too lol])

jiro (she is just so cool. introverted and operates mostly on the sidelines/behind-the-scenes, which i relate to and am also most comfortable with. she's like me if i was cooler and musically talented and had a rocker girl aesthetic)

most of class A (you can't hate any of them!! except for mineta maybe but the rest are all so cute and quirky [haha 🤪] in their own way)

mirio (energetic and positive and caring and such a bright light. also very hardworking. i'd love to have someone like him around in my life)

recovery girl (funny and sweet and a badass!! we love to see an advocate for the wellbeing of young heroes in training)

present mic (he is just such a funny announcer and narrator. always has something to say and i love his energy)

vestiges kudo and en (they are just..,., so handsome..,.)

love their character design/color scheme/aesthetic: nejire, hawks, shiozaki, shinso, lady nagant, the green arrow girl from world heroes mission

attack on titan

jean (a motherfucking STALLION. the man that he is ugh 😩 shoutout [and rip] to marco who is honestly the reason for his amazing character development. truthfully, i think he could've done better than mikasa at the end [and i love her but it's so obvious that she only ever had eren in her heart] but i appreciate his consistency)

hange (just wants to be left to her own devices and be her true, unhinged self. i respect it. i love how everyone also just accepts her eccentricities and no one really makes fun of her for it [except levi of course but i love their dynamic so much])

erwin (the kind of leader we all wanna see!! intelligent, competent, respectable, pragmatic but also caring and inspiring. knows how to and is capable of make difficult decisions. a charismatic pillar of the military fr. i get so emotional when i listen to eren zahyo [hiroyuki sawano the goat fr] because of his scene at the end of S2. i search it up on youtube sometimes just to feel something honestly)

bertholdt (my poor boy. got absolutely nothing except wronged 😔 it hurt me so much to see him have to be the villain in S2. another blorbo who deserved the world and was literally thrown out the window once he was killed off. justice for my boy! 😭)

sasha (i miss her so much!! she was so funny and wholesome. a simple gal with simple needs. her and niccolo were so (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) tragic ugh. it breaks my heart)

pieck (her voice!! she also voices nakamura in assclass which i talk about here later. as for her character, she is super intelligent, respectable, and admirable as a female soldier. i'm a sucker for good covert ops and she's definitely one)

colt (handsome, caring older brother to the death. i wish we saw more of him. he deserved better ;-;)

avatar: the last airbender (and korra)

toph (a badass. witty, funny, also really smart. does whatever she wants and gives no fucks)

azula (cunning. gorgeous. a crazy bitch and i love her for it. i wanna be her so bad)

asami (gorgeous. smart. talented. hard-working. literally the whole package. you wanna hate her but you just can't??)

airbending kids (jinora, ikki, meelo. all their voices match their personalities so well?? jinora is so smart and respectful, ikki is so sociable and good at interacting with people, and meelo is hilarious. i literally want to be all of them)

mako/bolin (i love them as a duo. they balance each other out and as siblings they just make so much sense)

wing/wei (they had so much potential for content as twin himbos 😭 so handsome too. i wish we saw more of them in the show)

assassination classroom (not a big anime but 10/10 would recommend this series. it's like a shorter mostly lighthearted version of mha with the wholesome school stuff)

koro-sensei (how could you hate him ;-; the more the show goes on the harder it is to accept his fate)

kayano (she's so cute. secretly crazy but for good reason!!)

kurahashi (she's literally sooo cute!! 😭 so fluffy)

nakamura (just the coolest girl ever. if i knew her irl i'd probably be intimidated by how cool she is)

takebayashi (he's kind of lame [i believe the current term for it is 'boyfailure'] but i just like him!! i can't explain why)

isogai (our fav poor class president!! he is such a nice and respectful boy)

maehara (a flirt and a playboy. i mostly only like him because he's handsome and he reminds me of kaminari from mha. i also love his friendship with isogai)

chiba/hayami (iconic sniper duo. very low key. i enjoy this introverted ship so much)

mashle

finn (the most normal™️ boy in this series. i'd love to be friends with him irl. he seems to be the only reasonable one in the group lmao. i guess he's considered kind of lame? but only cause his friends are wack jobs *affectionate*. his power is really cool and i think he deserves more interactions with his brother.)

lemon (my fav kooky girl. she'd host such a good girls' self care night imo. i feel like she deserves more attention but she's all good vibes and just so lovely)

dot (kinda crazy. almost the boy version of lemon? they give off the same chaotic energy but he's a good boy at heart and very golden retriever. he deserves the love he so wishes for!!)

abel (i don't care much for his character but aesthetically with the purple hair/clothes and his eyes i just. also his voice is nice and deep)

animal crossing

clay (my son. my bagel boy jr. the cutest baby boy to ever exist. he is never leaving my island)

ruby (my daughter. my fav rendition of the moon rabbit. also never leaving my island)

flurry (my emotional support hamster. got me through some tough times. my coping mechanism before anime. i let her leave my island and i regret it so much 😭)

julian (gay best friend i've always wanted and never had. he's too cool for me and he knows it. probably also knows he's too good to stay on my island but i will not let him leave)

dizzy/papi (literally so adorable. my sons who have since left my island)

marina/cheri (my daughters who have since left my island)

diana/whitney (they are just gorgeous and they know it. that is all)

aesthetically just love their character design: roscoe, spike, apollo, cyd, fang, hopper (do not ask me why i have no idea), tiffany, cleo, coco, aurora, roald

celeste (the nicest most adorable astronomy owl ever!! gives you the cutest star/space-themed items)

flick (sullen emo gay with a rocker aesthetic. hyper fixated on bugs. what's not to love)

pascal (hippie otter that's just vibin'. high all the time and i respect it. i love the way he looks. i wanted to buy a phone case off etsy with him on it and i still regret not getting it to this day [it is no longer for sale 🥲])

timmy and tommy (the cutest twins!! ...twins!! [iykyk lol]. happy and hardworking and literally the cutest tanukis ever.)

[messinwitheddie]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you. Spread the positivity!

1. My pets.

Well, animals in general make me happy. I'm glad I coexist with so many different creatures, but it makes me happy knowing I reached a point in life where I can care for my own pets. The responsibility of caring for them is something I gladly accept.

2. Being older.

Being "young" wasn't fun. I don't understand why youth is romanticized so much (I guess if you were hot and popular as a youngin' you would be sad to get older, but I was never pretty, popular, in-style or care free, so the state of not being young and hip doesn't scare me at all). I don't miss being a child or a teenager constantly at the mercy of adults who seemingly never matured past 18. I don't even miss my 20's much. I don't miss the pressure of not growing up to be a loser. I don't miss the drama of the teen "the world is my audience"mentality. I'm more comfortable with who I am now verses when I was young. I maintain/ have control over my own existence. I take pride in managing my own body, home and finances, regardless of the labor all of these things require. I have no one to answer to at the end of the day but me and that gives me peace of mind.

3. The very rare occasions where a TV show I like isn't canceled after 2-3 seasons.

4. My alone time.

It makes me feel guilty, because there are so many people in my life I love and love having in my life, but I LOVE being alone so goddamn much. It's the only time I can decompress even a little. When in the presence of other people, I'm on edge, no matter how long I've known them or how well I think I know them. I get very little alone time and I cherish every second of it I can squeeze in throughout the week.

5. Drawing

It's the most obvious answer, but it's genuine. Even though I will probably never finish a big project or reach the skill level I would like to reach.. Even when I'm in a funk or rut or whatever, drawing is a comfort.

Excuse the slow response. Questions like these always stop me dead in my tracks. The answer(s) should pour out easily and naturally, but they don't. I had to think long and hard about this. It's healthy to think about these things sometimes.

[marinecorvid]

6 Questions

RULES: answer the questions then tag some folx you want to get to know better/catch up with.

hell yeah tagged by mine pal @elfinismsarts

1. Last Song: the Regis theme from ORAS

2. Last Show: Mandalorian

3. Currently Watching: dual combo of Mandalorian and TLoU, for full dosage of pedro pascal being Dad TM

4. Currently Reading: uurrrgghhh theoretically i should be reading Greywaren. but I also said I was gonna reread Mr Impossible to have a good recollection of what’s going on. but i haven’t done either of those things so they’re very high on the To Do list

5. Current Obsession: Pokemon (Altered) Emerald! Though I sunk many hours into Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire with glee when they came out I never managed to beat Steven in my original Sapphire run as a youngin, and both previous Emerald rom attempts tapered off for different reasons, but I found a NEW hack that adds new areas to explore and I’m a slut for exploration in video games so I’m hoping that’ll keep me interested enough to actually finish a gen3 game

6. Unrelated Obsession: not very unrelated it is but my default obsession/special interest that I am thinking about At All Times is Pokemon Ranger GS. bonus unrelated obsession: just dragons, in general

tagging: @silvermizuki, @chaoticbooklesbian, @grovylethegreat, @primoresplendens - anyone else who wants to  =]

[shadowchancellor]

A Brief Rating of Ween’s Studio Discography

because i just finished their discography and have nowhere else to dispose of my thoughts. again.

1990: God Ween Satan: The Oneness

God Ween Satan is all you could ask for out of a debut record. it establishes the band’s genre bending inclinations, their sense of humor, and their tendency to hide emotionally devastating breakup songs in a pile of ridiculous bullshit so that the effect is greater. this is also the most punk Ween has ever sounded; every other track is full of screamed vocals and thrashing guitars, making for a unique sound in the band’s discography. tracks like opener “You Fucked Up,” “Old Queen Cole,” and “Wayne’s Pet Youngin’“ set this expectation, which is regularly subverted by songs like the spanish guitar rocker “El Camino,” the aforementioned breakup song “Birthday Boy,” or the 8 minute Prince pastiche “L.M.L.Y.P.” if there were one complaint to make about this record, its that they may have overdone it with the character voices. overall, though, this record is probably one of Ween’s best and worth a listen for any aspiring Ween fan.

Highlights: “You Fucked Up,” “Bumblebee,” “Old Queen Cole,” “Mushroom Festival in Hell,” “L.M.L.Y.P.,” “Birthday Boy.”

1991: The Pod

The Pod is a concept album, and the concept is mononucleosis. the band worked on this album while dealing with mono, and they managed to make the record sound like it, which is a goddamn achievement in its own right. every song sounds thick and slimy, like you’re lying in bed, sweating your ass off, trying to sleep off a high fever. its a hard feeling to describe, but when you hear it, it just sounds pestilent. this new sound allows the band to explore even weirder avenues than God Ween Satan, from the bizarre guitar groove and bellowing vocals of “The Stallion” suite to the lethargic wails on “Laura.” alongside more conventional cuts like the psychedelic “Captain Fantasy” and the nostalgic “Pork Roll Egg and Cheese,” The Pod sets a new standard of weird for Ween to strive for.

Highlights: “Dr. Rock,” “Pollo Asado,” “Captain Fantasy,” “Molly,” “Don’t Sweat It,” “Pork Roll Egg and Cheese,” “The Stallion Pt. 2.”

1992: Pure Guava

Ween is frequently misaligned as a pure comedy act, which i think does the band a disservice. they show genuine skill and respect for the genres they “parody,” and comedy is only a small part of the reason Ween works. this is true of every album that the band has released since its inception. if there were an exception to this, however, it would be Pure Guava. this the first Ween album recorded under a major label, so they took the opportunity to make the most bizarre shit they could think of. i’m not sure i can describe the sound of the weirdest songs on this record. i am equally unsure if i want to spoil them. as such, i will leave you with this: the lead single on this record, “Push th’ Little Daisies,” is the only Ween song to have ever reached the billboard charts.

Highlights: “The Stallion Pt. 3,” “Push th’ Little Daisies,” “Reggaejunkiejew,” “Pumpin’ 4 The Man,” “Mourning Glory,” “Don’t Get 2 Close (2 My Fantasy).”

1994: Chocolate and Cheese

on Chocolate and Cheese, Ween remembers that they’re on a label and makes something that you can almost listen to in public. this record takes the band in a much more commercial direction, but in doing so doesn’t sacrifice the quality or strangeness the band is known for. indeed, the genre experimentation is even more wild here than it was on Pure Guava, and as always, the band shows proficiency in damn near everything they try. from the philly soul cut “Freedom of ‘76″ to the Mexican murder ballad “Buenas Tardes Amigo,” Ween proves that they’re a regular musical multi tool. in conjuncture with their typical alt rock fare and their bizarre sense of humor (see: “Spinal Meningitis (Got Me Down)” or “The HIV Song”), Chocolate and Cheese comes out as one of Ween’s strongest showings, and one of the first records that i would recommend to someone who isn’t already a fan.

Highlights: “Freedom of ‘76,” “A Tear for Eddie,” “Roses Are Free,” “Baby Bitch,” “Voodoo Lady,” “Buenas Tardes Amigo.”

1996: 12 Golden Country Greats

12 Golden Country Greats was born when one of the Ween boys heard that you could get some session musicians that worked with Elvis if you went to Nashville with enough money. the result? a pretty alright country record. the session musicians steal the show on this one; the rich sound of classic country instrumentation makes this worth a listen for country fans. as a Ween record, however, it feels lacking. the band does well in the genre, but the lack of variety means that this record suffers somewhat. there are, of course, tracks worth listening to, but overall, 12 Golden Country Greats is unessential in Ween’s catalog, and lives and dies on the novelty of the fact that it is, in fact, a Ween country album.

Highlights: “I’m Holding You,” “Piss up a Rope,” “I Don’t Wanna Leave You on the Farm,” “Help Me Scrape the Mucus off My Brain.”

1997: The Mollusk

to get straight to the point, this is probably one of the best albums to start with for anyone interested in getting into Ween. The Mollusk is a concept album about the ocean, and despite this simple concept, the band does a whole lot with it. every song manages to sound nautical, even when the subject matter has nothing to do with the ocean. the genre bending typical of a Ween record is also much more focused here, focusing on rock and its sub-genres, primarily psychedelic and and progressive rock, resulting in tracks like the title track or “Mutilated Lips,” which manage to be some of Ween’s most accessible material. they also manage to put out one of their funniest tracks on The Mollusk, the raucous sea shanty “The Blarney Stone.” the album really picks up on the back half, with cuts like “It’s Gonna Be (Alright),” a lament on a failed relationship, “Cold Blows the Wind,” a ballad for a lover killed in a war, or the iconic “Ocean Man,” which anyone under 30 is likely familiar with. my only issue with this album is that it doesn’t experiment as much as many Ween albums do. despite this, however, The Mollusk is one of Ween’s strongest and most accessible albums, and should be the first stop for anyone looking into the band.

Highlights: “The Blarney Stone,” “It’s Gonna Be (Alright),” “Golden Eel,” “Cold Blows the Wind,” “Ocean Man,” “She Wanted to Leave.”

2000: White Pepper

on White Pepper, Ween attempts to out-Beatles The Beatles. this album is almost entirely composed of psychedelic pop rock, with examples of the band’s typical genre bending few and far between; the only two songs of different genres, the tropical rock Jimmy Buffett-style “Bananas and Blow” and the heavy metal “The Grobe” are on opposite sides of the record. in addition, this is one of Ween’s least weird records. this album forgoes almost all of the typical features of a Ween record in favor of a fairly straight-forward pop rock approach. despite this, White Pepper manages to stand among the band’s best records, and even approach the standards of the genre set by The Beatles themselves. indeed, the tight focus of the album is highly intentional, meant to show that Ween is not a gimmick band, and that they can make traditional rock music right alongside the best, but they choose not to, because whatever the hell it is they do is a whole lot more entertaining. because it is so different from the rest of the band’s work, i can’t recommend White Pepper as a first exposure to Ween, but it is a definite must-listen in the band’s discography nonetheless.

Highlights: “Exactly Where I’m At,” “Flutes of Chi,” “Even If You Don’t,” “Bananas and Blow,” “Back to Basom,” “Stay Forever.”

2003: Quebec

i’m just going to jump right to the conclusion here and say that Quebec is Ween’s magnum opus. this record, like The Mollusk, experiments with rock music and its sub-genres more than it tries others, creating some of the most unique tracks of the band’s career. this includes not one but two post-rock cuts in “Captain” and “Alcan Road,” the heavy psychedelic “Transdermal Celebration,” and the progressive rock epic “The Argus.” in addition, Quebec is easily Ween’s most melancholic record, and the typical dynamic of “funny song disarms you so sad song hits harder” established on God Ween Satan is flipped on its head. stranger cuts like “Hey There Fancypants” or “The Fucked Jam” function as breaks from the melancholy of the rest of the record, allowing you to gather yourself for the coming emotional critical hit. this culminates in the closer “If You Could Save Yourself (You’d Save Us All),” the breakup song to end all breakup songs that may or may not have made me cry the first time i heard it. you can’t prove that, though. you can’t prove anything. in conclusion, Quebec is an incredibly viable place to start for someone who is new to Ween, and is probably their best work to date.

Highlights: “It’s Gonna Be A Long Night,” “Transdermal Celebration,” “Happy Colored Marbles,” “I Don’t Want It,” “The Argus,” “If You Could Save Yourself (You’d Save Us All).”

2005: Shinola, Vol. 1

Shinola, Vol. 1 is probably the most high-effort compilation record ever released. rather than just putting out a bunch of poorly mastered demos, Ween remastered and re-recorded 12 songs from every period in their history which never made it to official releases, mastered them using their then-current resources, and released them all on one album. the result is the most eclectic record in Ween’s discography. bizarre early period tracks like opener “Tastes Good On Th’ Bun” or “Big Fat Fuck” sit alongside more conventional cuts like the hard-rocking Chocolate and Cheese outtake “Gabrielle” or the funky Mollusk B-side “Monique the Freak” it also features at least one previously unknown song, “Israel,” which is a jewish prayer spoken over a jazz instrumental. as a result, Shinola, Vol. 1 serves as a unique sampler of every era of the band. that said, though some tracks are essential, i wouldn’t recommend this album to beginners, if only for the fact that it is a compilation album and not indicative of what a Ween album typically sounds like.

Highlights: “Boys Club,” “Gabrielle,” “How High Can You Fly,” “Transitions,” “Israel,” “Monique the Freak.”

2007: La Cucaracha

after the more melancholic and serious Quebec, Ween returns to their typical fare on this record. the band continues their genre experimentation on La Cucaracha, becoming even more eclectic than their previous records, experimenting with EDM, reggae and new age. unfortunately, all of these experiments end up being lackluster. indeed, the genre experimentation on this record feels like a lame joke rather than something done out of genuine respect for the source material. despite this, La Cucaracha has some real gems in Ween’s discography; the 10 minute progressive rock epic “Woman and Man” and the serial killer love ballad “Object” are some highlights on the record. of course, i’d be remiss to not mention the funniest song Ween ever put to tape, “With My Own Bare Hands,” which is probably one of the best karaoke songs of all time. overall, La Cucaraha is an inconsistent mess, and perhaps not essential, but i personally can’t help but love it for the incredible highs it does reach.

Highlights: “Fiesta,” “Object,” “With My Own Bare Hands,” “Shamemaker,” “Woman and Man,” “Your Party.”

In Conclusion

Ween is easily one of the bands ever. i’m a big fan, anyway. if you want to try to get into Ween, i recommend you start with The Mollusk and work from that. Quebec and Chocolate and Cheese are the two i would recommend after that, and beyond that you can just go nuts. or you can go nuts straight out the gate if you like, that’d be appropriate for this band. here’s another spotify playlist, if only because i like putting these things together. not sure what the next one will be, i just that there will be a next one. have a good one.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5LggAk96ajGAgjTsLLAGOn?si=987d1692c62d40c0

[phoenixrisingbull]

Discovering Poachers

(A Tate Phoenix Story)

WARNING! 

You’d be better off sandpapering a lion’s butt, while wearing a pair of pork chop panties, than being caught on the other side of this fence! 

NO TRESPASSING!

(No Trespassing Sign Posted On All The Fences Surrounding Tate’s Land)

April 20, 2023

6:30pm EST

Poachers were the worst part of living in the mountains. 

Most hunters were respectful of hunting seasons and bought the proper licenses. They took the hunter safety courses and practiced their aim, planned all year to take an animal humanely and fed their families on the meat. And even hunters gave more to land conservation than any other organized group.

  Poachers aren't hunters, though. They are disrespectful thieves who take animals illegally, who travel onto private land without licenses and kill what they want, when they want. Poachers think they are above the law. 

   They are also notoriously dangerous, weapon-carrying a-holes trying their best not to get caught. Regular, legal-eagle, respectful hunters will chat with me and my crew when they see us out patrolling the borders of our property. Sometimes they'd chat for hours about what animals they'd seen and passed up. We get a lot of helpful information about land management of an area just from having a good chat with the locals during legal hunting seasons. Poachers were different, though. They ran, and when they were cornered, they lashed out like injured predators.

 I shook my head sadly at the expired deer that lay across the trail. The decomposition told me it had died within the last couple of days. The scavengers hadn't found it yet. A bad shot to the back end was the cause of death. It hadn't gone far, which proved that the animal had been poached on my private land. There was no way it had traveled a mile west from public land that surrounded my mountains. Not with an injury like that. 

 I wanted to strangle whoever had dared come onto my land and caused trouble. 

I scanned the trail behind the deer and tried to put together where it had run from. Kneeling down I touched a smear of dried blood on a broken sapling. Splintered branches and trampled, dry grass helped piece together what had happened. An hour of hiking and I found an abandoned campsite. The makeshift fire pit held only charred logs and cold ash, and I could make out stake holes in the ground where they must've set up a tent. Which means they're moving around. Not a good sign. I'll have to have my crew keep an eye on this corner of the land this weekend and see if I can't get lucky and catch them coming back. 

Taking in a deep breath letting my sensitive nose and ears do their thing, I caught the hint of human scents already starting to fade in the air. I picked up at least 4 of them. Gooseflesh formed on my arms raising the hairs. Evil was in the air too. Scanning the area again I used my mind link to alert the others.  

~Fam, we have a poacher problem. Be on the lookout for animal bodies and human alike. From the looks of it, they're moving inward, closer to Tarian Pack territory, and it has me nervous. We're gonna have to stop them before they get bold enough, and close enough, to take a bear, if you catch my drift. I'm going over to warn Darius and his pack, so they can be on the lookout as well. These people aren't acting like regular poachers. They aren't the get in, take their animals illegally, and get out type. I'm at the third old campsite. That's gutsy setting up tents and staying overnight. 

If you have to shift, be extremely cautious.. But if you can, stay in human form and use your senses to sniff around and see what's what. These evil beings aren't killing for meat, they're killing for sport. They're getting way too close for comfort. We have to stop them.. Stay safe out here, Fam. Keep the youngins close to your homes as well as the vulnerable females. Senses heightened. Double up on the patrolling. You know what to do..~

Ending the mind link I climbed back onto my horse and finished my patrol of the property lines as the sun began to set. I heard my brother, Tagan in my head as he replied with his funny wit, as usual..

“I say we put up signs sayin’ ‘Trespassers Welcome! Dog Food Is Getting Expensive!’”

Shaking my head with a soft laugh, I let out a deep sigh as I watched the sunset behind the mountains. This was my home, my mountains. And I'll do whatever it takes to protect it and my family…

[larsvalheim]

You can call me...

Troll Hunter

They weren't kidding when they said the bow is the best weapon against trolls. Especially for youngins like myself.

With the moat done and widened, my old friend proceeded to have inspiration for a workshop. So I let them try their hands at building one.

Meanwhile, I worked on that bridge I been meaning to build. Travelling from Camp 3 to Home base is now faster!

Having spent far more time here than intended, my travelling friend decided to take a break and check on their other worlds or as some would call it - "have some me time"

I then started tinkering on Camp 4 - building an underground room. I managed to run out of core wood before the walls came up. The lack of any defenses saw much an onslaught of yellow/blue/green-eyeds. Great for my weapon mastery, but slows down my building pace.

I will have to procure more core wood soon.

[thefudge]

a few (okay, maybe quite a few) scattered HOTD thoughts now that i’ve finally caught up: 

yay for having a sick day in bed to catch up 

the good: 

1. definitely a better written show than GOT even in its heyday, and that’s because a lot of the character moments are about showing vulnerability and conflict, not about seeing who gets to say the cleverest line. hotd falls into that sometimes too, but it pays more attention to character

2. the battle/action sequences - i rarely ever enjoyed them on GOT but they’re sparse and well done here, at least for now. the dragon scenes have also been pretty good

3. love the fact that we have so many unsettling/creepy/indefinable dynamics and that hotd dwells on them and doesn’t let you forget lol. i also think this show is doing a better job at depicting the “shades of grey” for every character in terms of morality. 

4. the acting is pretty solid all around 

the bad (up to this point):

1. that whole wedding sequence in episode 5. started out promising. loved alicent’s bad bitch entrance. and then...??? ser criston cole just went nuts??? and it was so chaotic and confusing and unconvincing. i assume that we will return to that whole mess at some point? because it was not explained or fleshed out and it makes no sense why they just let criston get away with it. sure, we could argue that the two houses might’ve been relieved to see laenor’s paramour die....but they’d never do that to poor laenor and they wouldn’t have left the culprit go unpunished. was that whole sequence meant to be confusing and dissatisfying? maybe i’m just dumb and didn’t get it 

2. ser criston cole. is just. a cartoonish 2-dimensional villain now? i don’t get it. they’ve shown they can write characters with enough complexity and deftness that we both understand where they’re coming from and condemn some of their actions. but i guess they just gave up for ser criston? and decided to turn him into a weird incel. and how is he not dead or exiled after what he did??? what sorcery did alicent pull.

3. laena’s death. how did a pregnant woman manage to run past everyone, including daemon, and get down to the shore? why did no one stop her? what a waste of a character. i looked up her death in the book....and the changes they made are strange. i like the idea of her choosing to die like a dragon-rider, but everyone’s absolute negligence of her, and her sudden desire to die felt out of left field. laena struck me as someone who wanted to keep fighting, not give up.

ship stuff: 

- daemon/rhaenyra is solid and have plenty of chemistry, but maaaan, she should’ve been way more angry with him after episode 4. i feel like he got off far too easy (which i guess is a running theme with all his pretend exiles). he struck me as pretty callous and calculating, even if he was also conflicted and drawn to her. i’m srsly waiting for her to put him in his place when they’re married. i need that to be a “rhaenyra is boss” family. in general, daemon is fun but also...kind of obnoxious. i think we’re maybe making too much of him, but matt smith does play the asshole type well, what can i say. i guess what i am trying to say is that i see them less as romantic soulmates and more as "we love each other and use each other” kind of targaryen flavor. which frankly makes them more appealing to me

- harwin strong/rhaenyra - very sad and cute and wholesome. would definitely read smut 

- alicent/larys strong - deliciously creepy vibes, but more in the vein of cersei and qyburn. on board.

- alicent/otto - god, i love the fraught & repressed father/daughter relationship. we had too few scenes with them!! love the toxicity, love the devotion, love how otto pretends not to see alicent’s misery, love everything about them

- alicent/rhaenyra - liked them better as youngins, i feel like the tension between them as older women is somehow...less interesting? idk. i still hope they have more interactions in the future. (i loved that montage in ep 4 where rhaenyra was having a blast and alicent was staring at the ceiling in boredom and agony as viserys did his business. the queer longing alone!)

 - alicent/daemon - that one rarepair/crackship i’m probably going to obsess over. i already have an elaborate oneshot in mind. i love ppl who almost never interact but who would have such interesting one-on-one conversations. also the fraughtness of daemon/viserys, and how much daemon probably resents alicent for “taking” his brother. anyway! 

- alicent/criston - i could be down for this in the scenario where alicent just steps on him repeatedly and he thanks her for it. ugh. really bleh about ser criston. 

- alicent’s targ kids have interesting sibling dynamics.....i assume more incest is coming from that corner too lol 

(sorry yall, most of my ships are alicent ships because olivia cooke <3333)

- laena’s girls! baela and rhaena! i want them to have ridiculously complicated subplots & romances, i want them to take center-stage! least they can do after wasting laena/daemon 

i think that’s everything for now. i’m kind of wondering why we’re doing all these time jumps and why we’re not taking our time. have we not learned anything from GOT? anyway, i’ll probably share my final thoughts after all episodes air.

[mikaze-discord]

Love letter project ♡

Sooo to celebrate the 4th anniversary of Shining live, I put together a project! I basically got a bunch of people to write a love letter for their favourite boy. Things like, why they like them, how they got to like them and what they like about them were all accepted!

The event was supposed to have 2 fans for each boy but unfortunately I was unable to get two for some of the boys. 

Under the cut will be the love letters for all of Class A!!! Please enjoy~ And thank you for all the people who participated in the event and taking the time to write the love letters out. 

CLASS A

OTOYA ITTOKI

From @ponzu-penzui:

Hello world! My nickname is Yuki, and I’m here to tell you about the sunshine boy that is Otoya Ittoki. The redhead of the series, Otoya is your seemingly a-typical sunshine in a mascot boy character. But, as we all know with these types, the sunshine isn’t as, well, sunshine as they seem. Or, if you didn’t know, well… spoiler alert I guess. Go watch the anime, or play the otome games, then come back here. Anyways, let’s get started on our journey, shall we? Through the rabbithole that got me here in the first place!

Otoya immediately became my best boy the second I saw him. I’m not quite sure what immediately got me at first, whether it be his red hair and eyes, his voice, or his immediate friendliness, but here we are. I should also mention that UtaPri was my first idol anime, so I was completely unaware what was going to hit me later. And, if you’ve watched the entire anime, you know where I’m going.

Season 4 was an emotional wreck. I cried at least twice. Did I have a newfound appreciation for Otoya after all that heartache? Definitely. Without spoilers, it was incredibly painful for me to watch, but I don’t regret it.

After watching the anime, I soon found out about the existence of Shining Live. So, with no other UtaPri content to binge, I started to play SL in late 2018. After playing for a little more than a year, I tiered in my first Otoya event (Heartwarming Snow Festival), and achieved my first top 200. Ever since then, I’ve tiered in every Otoya event, getting top 200, then top 100.

But, why do I like Otoya Ittoki even to this day? Well, I guess this is the time where I say that, after a certain point, I started to see bits of myself in Otoya. This led me to start to RP him, and, as you probably know if you’ve ever roleplayed a character before, I started to look at the miniscule amount of translated game content (many thanks to the Ohayaho Translation Team) for, well, more content. And content I did receive. Long story short, this only served to solidify Otoya as my favorite boy of not only UtaPri, but from all anime/manga/game content I’ve ever seen/watched. His cheerfulness may have been the first thing that got me in this rabbithole, but his backstory and how he managed to grow up pulled me in even further. And, I don’t think I will or want to get out anytime soon.

Next one from; Anon

As much as we all know our Otoya for how sweet and kind he is, there is so much more to him than just a precious smile. He is uplifting, cheerful towards everyone he meets. He has empathy and goes out of his way to make sure his friends are happy. Even so, Otoya has feelings that aren’t always happiness and smiles. He can feel sad and angry just like anyone else.

The reason I care and love Otoya so much is because he has shown me that I don’t have to always put on a smile. It’s nice to show off your pearly whites, but sometimes, it’s okay to be sad too. There are times in everyone’s life when they feel out of place and that they don’t belong. Otoya also felt this way and that’s perfectly okay. He’s still being the best idol he can be: The idol that Otoya loves the most.

MASATO HIJIRIKAWA

From Anon: 

Masato Hijirikawa. Why do I like Masato Hijirikawa? I like him to the point that it feels weird for me to even question why I do. He's just- a good boy. A great boy. I love him. As a joke, I'd usually say that it was his weirdly pretty, bowl-cut hairstyle that drew me to him, or I'd say that he caught my interest when I read that he was "very good with his hands" (wink wonk) in his Shining Live description, and while both of these reasons are still true, it wasn't until I started role playing him in an old server that I really started to appreciate his character more.

Masato, despite his aloof and almost "perfect" initial image, is a very relatable character. When he first arrived at Saotome (in-game) he wasn't necessarily seen as someone with a lot of talent to become an idol, which he acknowledged with grace and worked hard to make up for. He's humble despite his privileged upbringing and is incredibly self-aware of his flaws, which are sources of insecurity for him sometimes (a lot of times). Though it should be said that most of this insecurity stems from not having a lot of control over his early life, which is why it felt so gratifying to see him break free of his metaphorical chains to pursue his happiness without any doubts. He's a hard worker and is willing to accept criticism with open arms, not only for himself but for the people around him. Despite his traditional upbringing and nature, he's very receptive to change as long as it benefits both him and STARISH. He values the people he cares about more than anything, which is why he constantly strives to be a better version of himself every day, not only for himself but for the people around him.

Though his stoicism sometimes makes him seem plain or even "boring" to some people, he hides a warm, hidden passion within that's just as bright as everyone else's. Like the springtime bloom of cherry blossoms after winter, Masato shows his passion and love with no restraint to anyone who takes the time to understand him, and I can very much attest to this. I love him a lot and I hope to see more content of him, STARISH, and the others for more years to come.

NATSUKI SHINOMIYA

From uh....me:

HELLO I’m Z~ also known as the mod of the mikaze-discord/utapri-hcs tumblrs, as well as the organiser for the event! But enough about myself, let's talk about Natsuki Shinomiya.

When I first watched the anime as a youngin, I had already known about the games and their plots but had decided to try out the anime as well since I had nothing better to do.

Natsuki was actually one of my least favourite characters in the anime just because of how they presented him. I just...didn't care for him at all. He was just some random tall guy who loved hugs and almost murder…. Yeah.

I’m sure like most, I had a changing point. Originally, I was a Tokiya rper but...I was just unhappy with how my Tokiya was, I wasn't as experienced in rping with that server being my first rp server i was ever in. I didn't feel like I matched up with the others. I felt my Tokiya was just lacking something, substance maybe. Another person actually had a similar feeling and had changed their character from Camus to Syo and since we already had an Ai, I had just decided to go with the flow and complete the rest of the cute team. Best decision of my life. I’m so grateful for Natsuki and everything I associate him with. Without him, I probably wouldn't have made my tumblrs, I wouldn't have stayed in that server, I wouldn't have gone looking for other servers to rp in. I don't think I would be the same without Natsuki. I just find him so endearing now, he is just a lovable giant who happens to be able to be a disney princess. He is just so darn cute damn it. , just look at his Christmas card, his King card, quite literally just half his Shining live URs. Also, just like his songs just slap. Natsuki to me, is just serotonin. He gave me so many opportunities that I could have missed. I don't even think I would have started this love letter project without him if I’m being completely honest. I genuinely enjoyed all the memories I made as Natsuki. Thank you to Natsuki and to the Mikaze-discord for basically starting me off.

From Luke:

Natsuki was actually the very first character I encountered before I got into utapri. A friend showed a photo of him and told me that I'd probably be into this guy. She sure was right! After installing shining live for the first time and having a familiar face on the screen, I grew curious of him each day and just had to find out why was so attracted to him. The fact that I've seen him so many times in the past was haunting me, telling me that this man actually watched me grow up from a distance without even knowing his name. It sounds weird but I find it rather comforting for someone who doesn't want to be protected but isn't strong enough to defend myself alone.

The thought of having him there was enough to get me through the day and gave me enough reason to wake up to the next. I admit I may have adapted some of his habits after looking after his account for a year but that isn't a bad thing if it means that it would turn me into a much better person than I am now. I guess you could say we've grown together now in a sense, preserving the feelings and just living through the moment no matter how happy or sad it is. What's important is that we're not alone in all things we do and in everything we feel, there will always be someone there to keep us moving when we feel like giving up.

[eepytheartist]

TTTE: Magic Beyond the Engine

Greetings guys, gals, nonbinary pals and everyone in between. Welcome to the Information Page of TTTE: Magic Beyond the Engine, where you can get context to whatever the hell I post on here. There’s a lot and much is subject to change, so buckle up butter cups because we’re going for a ride.

Table o’ Contents

1. Basic Story

2. Characters

3. Personal Headcanons

4. Canonical Relationships within TTTE: MBtE

5. Other Notes

6. Link

I) Basic Story

   Several years ago in the year 20XX, a facility located in [REDACTED] was doing experiments involving a mysterious golden substance and what it could do for the human race. Its goal was to eliminate the need for high-maintenance engines to save money. However, much of what was done ended up being a total flop, except for one. A little girl, Madison [REDACTED] was the only successful trial the facility was able to produce. This girl didn’t know why or how she even got here, but knew that her family didn’t want her, and instead gave her up to this [probably very illegal] facility. For years the scientists running the experiment pushed her to her limits, training her to pull lines of cars weighing several tons. They were delighted by what she could do. They had finally compacted the strength and speed of an engine into a human. However, bad luck struck as the facility went belly up, when Madison was 21. News of the facility spread, and so did news about her. Humanity didn’t take her well, and she was labeled an outcast. Though, in the light of things with her negative fame, Sir Topham Hatt found out about her and thought she’d be a wonderful addition to the railway along with the new tank engine he just bought! So she was picked up by this cheeky little shit, and her story working alongside sentient engines unfolded.

II) Characters

   A) Thomas

      The one who picked up Maddy. He was awfully confused by her, but respected her nonetheless. Still his cheeky self that everyone seems to just adore, Thomas quickly became best friends with her, protecting her whenever she needed it. Thomas sometimes gets a little too cheeky, and pushes her off the edge. Pranks ensue and Thomas is usually left bumbling for apologies. Who knew something so small could be so dangerous. He also commonly gets called ‘Tommy’ by the wee lass, something he absolutely despises. It only fuels her need to use it.

         1) When human, Thomas stands at about 5′ 7″ or 170 centimeters. He’s clad in a simple hoodie that matches his paintwork with a big 1 on the back, and plain khakis. He wishes he could have something else, but he doesn’t get paid and his driver and fireman refuse to lend him money. His hair is fluffy and rather short and is a few shades darker than his paintwork. Maddy likes to braid it when she’s bored and he hates it. Her favorite part though, besides honking his bulbous nose like he was a clown like she does with James, is his eyes. They were a beautiful shade of ocean blue. If he wasn’t such a shit, she’d get lost. He can’t brag though, she basks in all the colors her friends have. 

“Why does she get to swear and I don’t? It’s not fair!” ~T

“Maddy’s an adult, Thomas.” ~E

“Well so am I you old fart!” ~T

   B) Maddy

      Little Maddy. Don’t call her Madison, she hates it with a passion and refuses to explain why. She currently stands at the age of 21, but looks much younger. She had overheard at the facility that a side effect of the mystery stuff was that she aged like an engine, so she could be around for hundreds of years if she wasn’t stupid. At just 5′ 3′’ or 160 centimeters, Maddy is the shortest out of all the engines on the railway, even Bill and Ben. Her hair is a medium shade of brown, kind of long, and it mostly covers one of her eyes, which are, as Thomas describes, “As if the sky could make steel.”. Shy when you first meet her, Maddy is quick to come out of her shell and be just as much of a shithead as Thomas and as angry as James, if not worse than the two combined. Her outfit was rather simple, a dark scarlet hoodie with her number on it, and dark grey or black leggings. She liked it that way, she looked good and it was flexible and comfy. When she first arrived with Thomas, she felt something click with James, despite him being an utter jackass to her. After begrudgingly showing her around and having to shunt trucks, the duo became good acquaintances. It wasn’t until after James’ accident that the two became best friends, being asshats together and generally being a happy sight. He’s the one Maddy is generally seen with if she’s not working on her own. Soon enough, though, something started brewing within her heart.

“Ah crumbs, he’s in a mood.” ~T

“James is always in a mood.” ~M

“Fuck both of you.” ~J

   C) Edward

      Ah, Old Iron. He was there when Thomas and Maddy first arrived to the island. Like most that laid eyes on her, his main worry is that she was itty bitty. Usually calm and collected unless something goes majorly wrong, Edward was quick to unknowingly swoop her under his wings. When Thomas started poking fun at him for being fatherly, Edward nearly keeled over. An engine can’t father a human, can they? He guessed they could as soon after Maddy just gave a shrug and accepted the Number 2 as her father, after being given away by her own. It didn’t take long for Edward to actually father her, asking how her day was, sometimes folding her laundry, comforting her, scolding Maddy James, y’know, dad stuff. He earned the name ‘Dadward’ from her, and his heart melts every time she says it.

         1) As a human, Edward looks like a kindly old man and a youngin’ at the same time. He stands just a bit shorter than James at 6′ or 183 centimeters. With short, almost midnight-blue hair, Edward is the perfect gentleman. He even has a small pair of gold glasses that set snuggly on his nose. His eyes are a lovely shade of steel blue, something he gets flustered about when Maddy compliments him. His outfit consists of a white dress shirt with a dark blue tie, a blazer matching his paintwork with his number on his right arm and dark grey dress pants. He’s not usually in his human form, but when he is, Maddy unusually asks for a lot of hugs..

“Will you two leave her be?” -E

“But look how red her face is!” P&T

“FUCK THE LOT OF YOU-” ~M

   D) James

      Ah, James. One half of what his friends call “The Red Disasters”. He’s still his normal, vain ass self. He has a soft side, everyone knows it but virtually no one can get to it. Except Maddy, who can get to it quite easily. Though, when they first met, all he did was make fun of her. Well, they made fun of each other, but still. They had the complete opposite of favorite jobs, they still do and always will. James loves pulling coaches, she hates it. She loves trucks, he despises it and always tries to weasel his way out. It usually doesn’t work. He’s earned many nicknames from her: Jamsey, Jimbo, Buzzy, Buzzy Butt, the list grows. Two of them came from the mistake about telling her the story about the bees, the other.he’s not too sure. What he is sure of, though, is that Jimbo has spread than to more than just her and he hates it. It fuels her though, so he’s gotta be careful. Originally, though, James didn’t know what to think of her. After the accident, his boiler felt all fluttery and he pushed it down to just being ill. He had to learn the hard way about what romantic love was. He knew how to flirt, it got people to love him more! But what that flirting did, though, he was completely foreign to.

         1) At 6′2′’ or 188 centimeters, James stands as the third tallest among the main eight. When he still had his black livery, James’ human form basically had him looking like what I can simply describe as a butler, though he had a vest and a red tie instead of all black. After, though, he had quite the change. His long, black hair now had dyed red tips and his right ear had a cute little heart piercing. Hair covers most of his left eye, which is what Maddy lovingly described as, “You managed to make the color of red rust beautiful.”. He thinks his hair looks cool only according to Maddy. He usually wears a long-sleeve, dark red button-up shirt with three dark grey stripes on both arms and grey pads on his shoulders. His number was sewn onto his left breast. Maddy pokes fun at him for looking like a band geek, but she nonetheless likes it. His outfit is simply finished off with grey pants. Sometimes, though, he’s seen wearing a solid red hoodie that Maddy got him. He won’t admit that it’s his favorite piece of clothing.

“Honey Bee, you’re acting irrational-” ~J

“DON’T MAKE ME GET THE BEES-” ~M

“NOT THE BEES-” ~J

   E) Gordon

      There isn’t much to say about Gordon. He’s his usual, grumpy self. We all know deep down he’s a good engine, though. Gordon’s...rather indifferent about Maddy. He doesn’t dislike her, but he doesn’t see her appeal either. Nonetheless, she’s an awesome part of the team. She does the most important job: listening to James bitch so they don’t have to. Of course, though, like the rest of the team, he’ll defend her if need be. Gordon has a heart, he just doesn’t like to show it.

         1) Gordon’s the tallest, at 6′8′’ or 203 centimeters. Everything about his human form is perfect. His hair is just a tad darker than Edward’s and a teeny bit shorter. He keeps it slicked back most of the time, but it’s hilarious when he has bed head. Maddy got a picture once and sent it to James just in case he forced her to delete it. Just like most of her friends, Gordon’s eyes were her favorite, they were a blue similar to his hair, but a few shades lighter. Maddy remembers a time she complimented them and Gordon puffed away all red in the face. His outfit consists of a three piece suit, in his paintwork color of course, a white shirt and a red tie. His number is on his right breast.

“The Express isn’t that important.” ~M

“Why I’ll tell you-” ~G

“Is her intent just to piss him off?” ~E

“Yes. It’s both of ours.” ~J

   E) Henry

      Maddy’s favorite engine besides James. Thomas is insulted that he isn’t even considered one of her favorites. Henry gushed over her the first time she came. He must protect the small. Love the small. If James suddenly didn’t exist, Henry would be her go-to. She adored puffing through the forest with him, looking at all the trees and wildlife. Maddy would take pictures of flowers she’d find while strolling through and Henry would just ooze over them. Once she showed him a photo of a squirrel holding a wild flower under an oak tree whose leaves were just started to turn different colors, and the big engine cried with joy. He requested she print the picture out so his driver could carry it for him, and she did. It was his absolute favorite.

         1) 6′6″ or 198 centimeters, what a height to be. At second tallest, Henry is the definition of a gentle giant. His resting face looks nervous, but he’s usually not nervous at all. His hair is a forest green, not too short, not too long. Actually, Maddy’s favorite part of him is his chicken-wing bangs. Of course she loves his eyes, which are a lovely jade green, but the bangs take the cake, Whenever they hang out, she likes to play with them when he talks about plants. He finds it comforting. His outfit is literally just a more modest and fancier workman’s outfit, but matching his livery, with his number on his right breast. It made sense, since he was usually one to do heavy work.

“You don’t like the rain either?” ~H

“The last time I went out in the rain I derailed Percy.” ~M

“Why were you even out in the rain!? You’d catch a cold!” ~E

“Fat Man said I was the only one available and told me to suck it up. I did catch a cold. James tried making me soup, remember?” ~M

“What do you mean tried..?” ~H

“He forgot to cook the chicken beforehand. I got salmonella.” ~M

“So that’s why you were bedridden and wouldn’t talk to him for a week after..” ~H

   G) Percy

      Ah, little shit number two. Thomas’ partner in crime. When he first met Maddy when he arrived, he teased her relentlessly for being short-tempered and short in general. After giving him the silent treatment though, Percy was a bit nicer. He and Thomas still tease her plenty enough, but they tease about things she usually won’t kick their asses for. He likes Maddy now. Plain and simple.

         1) Second shortest, 5′5″ or 165 centimeters. He holds those two inches with pride. Percy uses them against Maddy very frequently. Maddy won’t hurt him though. She physically can’t. His little baby face, those big ol’ light green eyes, that short light green hair, his cute little outfit [which consists of a shamrock colored shirt, black suspenders held up by gold buttons, and dark green shorts]. If he was any smaller Maddy would die. James sometimes gets jealous by how much she gushes over Percy, but doesn’t exactly blame her. Percy’s adorable and he damn well knows it.

“Ha, you’re short.” ~P

“You’re short too.” ~M

“I’m taller than you.” ~P

“Won’t be for long when I take your kneecaps.” ~M

   H) Emily

   Ah, Emily. The first girl engine she met. They made damn good friends, too. They gossiped whenever they had a chance. Maddy usually talked about shit James has said, and Emily just gossips about anything and everything. They were will to throw hands for each other, with Emily more willing to for Maddy. Maddy would throw hands just as an excuse to do it. Emily still loves her, though.

         1) Emily currently stands at 5′8″ or 173 centimeters. She isn’t as girly as she looks, either. Her hair is short, with half of it buzzed off. Maddy would describe her as someone punk-ish. Of course Emily’s personality doesn’t reflect that at all, she just chose to look like it. She’s the only other engine besides James to have piercings, usually with two black on on the top of her ears and hoop earrings to pay honor to her engine build. Emily was a little more casual than her friends, usually seen wearing a simple green dress matching her livery. Her eyes were a very dark grey, almost black, with flecks of brass scattered in there. Maddy told her once that she was the prettiest girl she’s every seen and Emily nearly crashed.

“James being a bitch again?” ~Em

“What do you mean again?” ~M

“I can hear you.” ~J

“I know.” ~M

   I) Others

      Other characters consist of secondary characters within the story who do not play as big a role. There are a few who teeter on the edge between primary and secondary characters, such as Duck, Donald, Douglas, Diesel, Diesel 10, and Lady. They play an important role, but not enough so to have their own descriptions. Diesel’s..y’know, Diesel, the twins think of Maddy as their long-lost sister, Duck..well, they like to poke fun at James together when he’s not droning about the Great Western Railway, Diesel 10′s goal is to get her to say something about Lady, and Lady...no one’s really sure yet. Then, as of right now for true secondary characters there is Oliver, Toad, BoCo, Bill, Ben, Mavis, and Salty. There’s more to come, but that’s what I got right now.

III) Personal Headcanons

-The engines can eat and taste in both forms. They don’t know where it goes when they’re engines and don’t feel like finding out.

-James learned to cook for Maddy when she couldn’t for herself.

-For the longest time, James was the only engine with his own phone.

   -He learned hip language and Maddy started regretting every choice in her life.

-Maddy comes to Salty for him to tell her stories when she’s bored.

-Rain is Maddy’s one weakness since she has no way of covering herself.

-She, along with her friends as humans, run with skates that reflect their wheel configuration. The wheels retract when not in use. [I’m thinking about switching to roller blades, we’ll see.]

-Maddy intentionally starts beef with the Scottish Twins because she thinks the fighting is hilarious.

-Thomas will occasionally beg Maddy for a cotton candy sucker. Specifically cotton candy. She doesn’t know why either.

-Thomas initiated a prank war with her once. He lost.

-Gordon once bet her that she couldn’t pull his heavy goods. His driver was out 30 bucks because of him.

-Maddy tortures Duck with duck puns.

-Maddy still trick-or-treats for free candy.

-Emily once convinced Maddy to derail James for the fun of it. She was subsequently chased around the island.

-James is the ultimate flirt and he uses that against Maddy, who flusters very easily. 

-Percy loves Teddy Grahams.

-Edward likes loves to tell others about his daughter. Maddy does not. He is becoming too dad-like.

-The Scottish Twins know damn well that Maddy simps for their accents and they intentionally use it against her if they can.

-Maddy knows about Diesel’s ducklings. It’s the only reason she decides to befriend him.

-James utterly hates Diesel for many many reasons.

-Like many others headcanon, Thomas can’t cook. He fucked up a cup of ramen once and Maddy still refuses to let him live it down.

-Edward refuses to let Thomas and Percy swear. They hate it. James and Maddy know this. They swear more because they can’t.

-James and Maddy are at a tie for worst potty mouths. The twins don’t count. That’s not fair.

-Oliver thought Maddy was an engine for like a month before he met her.

-Maddy dislikes the Mainland. Not the engines there. They’re cool. 

-If Maddy isn’t around, James sleeps in her bed with her hoodie.

-Henry worries for Maddy all the time. More and Edward and James combined. He just doesn’t show it.

-Gordon says he has no opinion on Maddy, but he really does like her.

-No one knows where Maddy’s really from. She won’t tell them either. Not even James or the Fat Man really know.

-Want more? Just ask!

IV) Canon Couples within TTTE: MBtE

~James/Maddy

~Edward/Henry

~Emily/Thomas

~D10/Lady (In the past)

~~We’ll see about others as the story progresses~~

V) Notes

- Lady is the reason the engines have sentience. She is not the reason for their human forms. That will be explained later.

-Maddy is much more resilient than an average human, which is why most accidents don’t just straight up kill her.

-As stated before, Maddy can now live for hundreds of years if she’s careful enough. She won’t age as fast as a normal human, so who knows how long she’ll be baby-faced. Not that she cares, more opportunity to trick-or-treat.

-The engines can get frisky, but no babies. Don’t even think about it.

-Maddy will eventually give in and buy beds for all her friends to give them an opportunity to sleep like she does.

VI) Link

Silly me, I forgot to give a link to my story! Shame on me for making you search, that won’t happen again, here you go!

Sodor’s New Worker

________________________________________________________________

And that’s really it. If you have any questions, please please please please please ask!

UPDATED: August 3, 2021

[mytastessuck]

Ween: The Mollusk

1Here we are, one of the tie-winners for my favorite Ween albums. What can I say about The Mollusk that hasn't been said already? It's one of the few Ween albums that dared to stick to a theme. It's manages to spread from genre to genre while sticking to that theme. It literally fucking inspired Spongebob Squarepants. The fact that this album doesn't top every single music list that records culturally important albums is an injustice against mankind. In fact, let's check its accolades:

It was picked as #41 on Consequence Of Sound's Top 50 Albums of 1997

...

...I'm pretty pissed so let's get started.

1. I'm Dancing In The Show Tonight

Inspired by a ballet record, this song prepares the viewers for the madness with a simple Vaudeville tune. Most listeners listened to this and thought, "Ha, classic Ween!" not in anyway prepared for the real show that was about to begin...

9/10

2. The Mollusk

Okay, this song is fucking beautiful. It really is something you listen to when looking out over the sea. You can feel the sand beneath your feet while Gene croons on about the mollusk with the wandering eye. No wonder it's Dean's favorite Ween song.

1999/10

3. Polka Dot Tail

Love how this sounds like something you can hear at the pier. Really, have you ever seen a whale with a polka dot tail? You have? Well, I assume you were heavily intoxicated at the time. Don't get high around the pier. It's dangerous.

10/10

4. I'll Be Your Jonny On The Spot

Awesome guitar on this one. Shame about the dude's father. Still, sick fucking shredding on this track. It'll get you up early in the world.

11/10

5. Mutilated Lips

I can recite the chorus to this song from memory in one breath. Enough about how awesome I am though, you can feel the haze from this song. It's greek fire.

20/10

6. The Blarney Stone

Every sea shanty in the past, present and future bow before your god. Bawdy, hilarious and impossible to not sing along to, The Blarney Stone will bring a tear to your eye and a tear to your throat as you try to imitate Deaner's voice.

1446/10

7. It's Gonna Be (Alright)

Perfect break-up song for when you want to let your ex-partner know there are no hard feelings. Eat a dick, Good Riddance.

...

Okay, don't do that. I don't know why I'm trying to stir up shit. There can be more than one awesome break-up song. I prefer this one though.

10/10

8. The Golden Eel

An eel used to taunt Dean and Gene from the aquarium that they had in their place and now the eel will haunt you too due the absolute supercell thunderstorm of instrumentation on this album. This eel may be the most famous eel in history...aside from the other one:

https://i.makeagif.com/media/11-05-2015/X03hR3.gif

Jesus...

19/10

9. Cold Blows The Wind

A reinterpretation of the traditional English folk song The Unquiet Grave, this song is pretty depressing to listen to but makes up for it by having beautiful harmony. Kick-ass for a tragic ballad.

1400/10

10. Pink Eye (On My Leg)

Nice instrumental. Pretty relaxing and a cool way to ease you into the other heavier stuff. What else is there to say? Uh....

Uh....

Uh....

Uh....

8/10

11. Waving My Dick In The Wind

Ah, the song that captures the feeling of waving your dick in the air. Guys and gals and any others who have the privilege of having a penis, I recommend you have this song on when you have the privilege of having your dick out in public. Legally of course.

9/10

12. Buckingham Green

Sweet delicious prog from Ween. Wears the coat of a tragic tale of royalty but Buckingham Green is a strip mall in Pennsylvania so...that must have been an interesting dynasty. God Save The Sales.

4950/10

13. Ocean Man

Ah, you damn whippersnappers know this one by heart, don't ya? Well, while you youngins may remember this one from your Vines, I first heard this song the way God intended: in the end credits of The Spongebob Squarepants Movie. As I mentioned above, The Mollusk was a direct influence of Spongebob Squarepants. Don't believe me? "Beware your wandering eye, you little mollusk?" Ring a bell? Still don't believe me? Stephen Hillenburg directly commissioned the band to compose a song for the show, a song called "Loop De Loop". Alright, history lesson over. Get off my lawn.

2012/10

14. She Wanted to Leave/I'm Dancing In The Show Tonight (Reprise)

Heartbreaking. This guy really should have worked on his game. Maybe start by not marrying women you preyed on as children. Just a tip. Nice way to end the album though. So of course they gotta dunk on us by actually ending the album with a dreary instrumental version of the first track. It's like you can hear the curtains closing...

19/10

Album Score: 85.1/10

Next week, we will tackling my other favorite Ween album: Quebec. It contains my second favorite song of all time so you know the review will be super fair! See you there.

[brideofcthulhu10]

The Lost Boys Find Out Their Fem!S/O is Pregnant [4/4]

SUBJECT WARNING: PHYSICAL AGRESSION, SEXUAL THEMES AND A WHOLE LOT OF SWEARING. READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED!

Alrighty then, my lovely fang babes! Here we are, we have the last of the first edition of the pregnancy saga! Worry not, dearest readers, for there is hope! I plan on doing a separate series about going through the pregnancy, and maybe even going through the childbirth with how the boys are as new dads. Let me know in the comments if you'd like to see more, and by tomorrow night we'll have a whole new set to love!

It was such a blast writing Paul's, I'm not gonna lie I got lost in the magic! We have a cute little character cameo for all you 80s movie nerds, lemme know if you can figure out what it is! So, without any more delays; here he is. The gorgeous, the goofy, the one, the only:

PAUL

Today had been an unexpected challenge. You barely got through your shift at the record store, every time you were in light it made you dizzy. Hangovers had nothing on this! Did you drink too much the night before? No, now that you thought about it any attempts to drink had you hugging a toilet. Not to mention your period was late as hell! Well, not the cramps, go figure. Just no blood. None at all. 

You never let on to your beau, Paul, though. The party boy vampire would become overly worried if you told him you were sick, and you weren't about to spoil a good time with a bit of nausea. So here you were, stumbling about the day into the late afternoon absolutely miserable. Your manager Iona offered you some crackers and ginger ale during your lunch break. No dice, within an hour you were running to the bathroom again. 

"Gosh hon, I dunno what ta tell ya. Maybe you ate something nasty, I told you that boardwalk food was fishy," Iona sighed, poking at her own lunch with a fork. Currently your coworker Andie was watching the front until you were feeling better.

"Kill me now, Iona," you groaned, chin resting on the table with your arms laid over your head. Then there was a smell. The greatest, most flavorful, mouthwatering scent you've ever experienced. Like a honey baked ham and a New York sirloin had a glorious new baby drizzled in ecstasy. Glancing over, your stomach growled at whatever it could be. If this were a cartoon you'd be flying to what it was.

Oddly enough, it was coming from Iona. Well, whatever black stuff was in her little plastic tupperware dish. Who cares what it was, it smelled incredible.

"Hey uh..," you asked, leaning over towards the sticky, mysterious delicacy calling your name. "You wouldn't mind if I had a bite, would ya?"

"You sure, hon? This isn't exactly your average dish, it's kinda weird," she tried to explain. God you couldn't take your eyes off it! Finally, your merciful manager pushed it your way, and you couldn't resist any longer. 

"I don't even care, this is the first thing in the past two days that hasn't made me nauseous," you muffled between cosmic bites.

Oh shit, this was heaven! It had to be some sort of meat, it reminded her of a nice spicy kielbasa, a slow roasted brisket, every second it changed to some new world of food you had never tried. What it was didn't matter by this point.

"Wooow. I've never met someone who liked black pudding that much."

Pudding? "I thought it was meat or something? It doesn't taste anything like pudding," you insisted, polishing off the very last specs of it. "Got any more?"

"No, no, not like chocolate pudding or stuff like that, kiddo. black pudding. It's this dish from the UK my new boyfriend made me. It's congealed pig's and cow blood mixed with spices."

You made a face. Blood? Like, blood blood? The cow equivalent of what Paul drank on a daily basis? Yet this was the first time you didn't puke, in fact, you kinda wanted more. Even knowing what is was made of.. for some reason you craved more. Meanwhile Iona continued to talk on and on, until one phrase caught your ears. "Yea, ya know my mom was so into for the longest time. Said she craved it her whole pregnancy, I never got a taste for it honestly."

A single thought popped into your head. A dangerous, foreboding thought that your intuition said was very much a possibility. In a flash you jumped up, nearly slamming your hands on the table. "I gotta go. Oh shit, I gotta go! I'll be right back, I swear, I'm so sorry, I swear to god I'll be right back," you shouted as you bolted out of the store.

"Wait what-?!"

You'd make it up to her once you got back. You had to know! You had to be sure..! Please just let it be paranoia! Please let it be anything, anything at all besides what you thought it was!

Once you reached the nearest CVS you made a B-line to the women's health section. Your hair clung to your face, your lungs stung like crazy but all you could think about was getting answers. And cue the disapproving glare of some old bat picking out a box of pads. Alright being 17 in front of the pregnancy tests looked bad. You weren't just a high schooler, you looked it too. "What're you looking at, " you snarl. Immediately she clutched her pearls, startled by this abrasive youngin' in no mood for dirty looks. God why'd there have to be so many options? Pink boxes, purple ones, bright yellow insisting it worked the fastest. The heavy fluorescent lights were no help at all, it made your head spin. You had no time for this crap. In a sweeping motion you grabbed three different brands and threw them into your basket, all you needed was….where was your wallet? Shit... Glancing around you checked for any nearby cameras or staff. Karma be damned, it was an emergency! Five finger discount it was. 

Once again you made a mad dash back to the record store as the sun finally set. All three boxes were crumpled in your hand, your boots running so fast it you hit a rock that'd be it.

But getting back to the record store was your best bet. You weren't about to pee in some dirty, old, nasty pharmacy bathroo- oh fuck. There was something that finally slowed your steps, nearly making you trip in the process. Four bikes parked right outside. Three of which were occupied by by Dwayne, David and Marko all talking amongst themselves.

Shiiiit, shit, shit! All you could do was swear repeatedly. Before they could spot you, you practically dove into the alleyway behind the store, rapidly disabling the alarm. If that went off it'd be a dead giveaway. Quickly you looked left and right before you slammed the door shut behind you still trying to catch air.

But there, right past the door to the employees lounge, over by the counter you could see a mass of blonde hair chatting away with Iona about Led Zeppelin's best album to date. Paul, gorgeous as every, laughing. It made your heart flutter, but then it sank. What if it was a-... He was never the type to run away from a challenge. But then again, a kid wasn't a challenge, it was a massive ordeal. It would take a huge chunk of his life- well, afterlife! Boozing and cruising would be switched out with drowsy days and busy nights. You weren't sure if you wanted him to know if you were, it would take all that from him. Unfortunately, he must've smelled you or sonething, because immediately he turned around like a puppy being called.

"Babe," he cheered with delight, rushing over to hug you. Rather squeeze you by your hips and lift you four feet off the ground. Quickly you stuffed the skinny boxes into your back pocket, now smushed up against his chest. "Where were you? Ion's said you just bolted mid-shift, we were worried sick! Well, I mean, I was more worried though, cuz I can't stand you bein' gone, kitten."

"Well, yeah uh, I forgot something I had to get at the store, and I forgot what time I got off," you hesitated, still antsy to escape to the bathroom. Truthfully you didn't actually want to, you had to! If you could, you'd just kiss him and ride off into the night to raise some hell like you always did. But this was too big to ignore.

Paul raised a brow. You weren't known for being this jumpy. You wouldn't look him in the eyes, they just kept darting towards the bathroom. Boy, you really did look sick, though. Pale, almost greenish with dark circles under your eyes. You even felt colder than usual. "Am I uh, interrupting something, babe?"

You managed to work out if his arms, giggling nervously. "Actually I-I had some of Iona's lunch earlier, and I just, gotta- be right back!"

With that, you bolted into the bathroom and slammed the door behind you. Again, weird. Paul just shrugged, maybe you had some bad Mexican.

 Iona wasn't convinced. Little miss jumpy-pants skipping out on her, you owed her an explanation. While Paul perused the albums she sunk over to the bathroom, rapidly tapping on the door. "Y/N! Psst! You good in there, hon?"

You were most certainly NOT good! Your hand shook, the third test finally finished. Not like it mattered! They all said the same thing. Every fucking one of them.

Positive. Positive. Positive.

No, no, no!

"Shit," you hissed. "Shit! Oh shit, oh fuck! Fuck-fuckity shit fuck fuck! Dammit." That's all you could do! You swore over, and over, and over, rapidly kicking the wall in front of you. Stupid pink plus! Why? Why did it have to be a plus?? Immediately you threw it in the trash and scooped up the other two. Maybe they were all flukes? Maybe only a doctor could tell you! You had to get home. Like now. Right now, you just had to rush home, make an appointment at the doctors, maybe hide in shame for a few days just until you could figure out what the hell to do with all this! Once again you wedged the tests in your back pocket and nearly tripped, cracking open the door to face your boss. "Iona, I gotta get home."

"Seriously, Y/N?? Why? What is with you?"

"Please, I swear I will make it up to you, I'll take a double shift, I'll wash your damn car-"

"Oh no, nuh-uh. Not until you tell me why you're being such a spaz," she practically shouted in a hissing whisper, absolutely exasperated. You teens and your drama, when she always said she wanted to fell young again this is NOT what she meant!  

"Listen i-... iyay amyay egnantpray," you whispered. Pig latin. It was a little code you two usually reserved for secrets. Well, that and talking smack about snotty customers. But wow was this a big ol' secret. 

Iona covered her mouth. Oh, you little idiot! You poor little idiot. Looking over at the unsuspecting boyfriend she sighed, looking you in the eyes. She wanted to just tell you to come clean to your man. The boy hung around you constantly, you two were the ultimate it-couple, there wasn't even sparks it was like watching supernovas. Something this big.. it shouldn't be left in the dark!

But that pitiful expression on your face just begged her to keep quiet, and frankly it wasn't her place to tell you what to do- well, at least in this regard. "Alright, alright. This saturday you're taking my night time shift, there's a big concert I wanna go to. And you gotta wax my car, it's gettin' nasty. And you better write the best damn apology note in the history of apology notes, sweetie. This is huge, you better come clean to him eventually, or I'll kick your little butt you hear me?"

"Yes. Absolutely, fine, deal. Just please, please keep him busy, I'm not ready to tell him," you whined, clutching the door. Frankly it sounded like a piss poor plan, but it couldn't be helped, not right now at least. You didn't have the strength to confront the situation head on, you were barely keeping it together. You wanted to cry all over, jump into his arms and come clean now, but this was neither the time or place.

As soon as Iona went to go over to Paul you stuffed the tests into your purse and bolted out the back door, only this time stealth was not on your side. Right at the mouth of the alleyway, just as you were about to be home free- you ran smack dab into a particularly lithe blonde that felt like a brick wall. You went flying onto the ground, your purse crashing onto concrete with a hundred pieces of your privacy going every direction. In a panic you began to rapidly stuff it all back, barely able to hide the first two tests as you threw some half baked apology Marko's way. Honestly he deserved a better one than that, but you were too frazzled to be fair at the moment.

"Oh shit, Y/N," Marko exclaimed, immediately kneeling down to help you gather the scattered remains of your purse. "Sorry, I didn't even see you, I was coming back for a smoke. Big Ed is such a douche, can you believe theres no smoking on the-..." His words trailed off, and you shortly saw why. Grasped between his pointer finger and thumb was the little pink strip, and a look of complete disbelief. All you could do was snatch it from him, a heavy moment of silence magically muffling the wild noise and shouts of the busy boardwalk. 

"Do...D-Don't worry about it. Look, I gotta get home, I'll see you arou-," you started, trying to jump up, maybe catch him off guard and make a run for it. Not this time. 

You hadn't even noticed he grabbed your wrist, it was such a blur. He stayed silent, standing up and looking right into your eyes with hidden malcontent. You swore if you answered wrong this mischievous cat would tear your throat out. After all, you were his best friend's girl. If you did anything, ANYTHING, to hurt him... Well, let's just say a pregnancy would be the least of your worries. "Why are you running, Y/N? What the hell is this thing," he asked quietly, eyes flickering between red and blue. "Did you…?"

"Oh don't fuckin' even," You snapped, smacking his arm, yanking your hand out of his grasp. "Of course not! You butt! God, are you serious? What do you take me for- No! I- fuck I just- no!" You kick the tin trash can beside you, watching a plethora of trash fly into the air. "I am freaking out! Of course it's Paul's. Oh fucking god, it's Paul's and I don't know what to do!"

Marko's expression softened, placing a hand on your shoulder. "Hey, I didn't mean to make it sound like that, Y/N. Paul's my friend, I just had to be sure you weren't sneaking around, you know?"

You sighed, pushing back your mess of a hair with misty eyes. This was perfect, a real big screw up from start to finish. All you could do was look over at Marko with pleading eyes. "You can't tell him yet. Please, just please please PLEASE, Marko, don't tell Paul yet!"

"Tell me what, babe?"

Shit. Shit on a stick. You looked behind to see Paul halfway out the back door with a look of concern, one that he rarely carried. You and your dumb mouth, go figure.

The blonde pushed through and let the door close behind him, looking over at his best bud standing alone with his girlfriend who was begging him to keep something secret, from him no less.

 "Marko?"

"Nah, nah, don't look at me man, this is all on you guys," he sighed, hands up in a shielding motion. "Good luck buddy. Gotta go, Y/N." with that the young vampire excused himself from this melting pot of drama, hands stuffed in his pockets. 

You just stood there, keeping the little strip tightly grasped behind your back. Paul was silent, but glancing at his hands you saw they were balled so tight his knuckles were white. "P-paul…," you hesitated, biting down on your bottom lip. "I should really… get home.."

Paul only raised a brow, glancing at your arms still tucked behind you. This wasn't like you to hide from him, and that alone frightened him. Nothing had ever frightened him before. And he didn't like the taste of it one bit. "What's behind your back, babe?"

"What?"

Again his spoke, this time his voice lowered into a low growl. "What... do you have... behind your back, babe?" The way he said it was so firm, it made you shake a little. You didn't like stern Paul. They way he hissed the word "babe", practically spoken through clenched teeth

Your throat ached, eyes darting across the ground struggling to think up a good excuse. Anything. A book, your purse, a surprise for him! Anything!

"N-nothing." Apparently, you failed to find any excuses. Great.

Paul's knuckles began to crack, jumping forward to try and snatch it from behind you. When you dodged him, he grew even more furious. You both began to struggle, pushing him away, insisting he just stop and let you leave. But every attempt to reject him only upset him further. Why were you hiding things from him?! How could you just ditch him at the record store when he was worried sick about you??

The struggle built up until finally he had enough. His eyes turned white with rings of fire, brow looming heavily over his eyes and fangs jutting out where his incisors once were. In a flash he grabbed you by you wrists, pinning you so hard to the wall it shook. You still tried to struggle. Thrash, kick, squirm! Steel wished it could be so strong, your muscles ached. This probably wasn't even his full strength, but it dwarfed you in comparison. This terrifying side of Paul you had certainly seen before, but never had you been on the receiving end. It was in all sense of the word, predatorial. He'd never try to kill you, but you still felt that horror build up inside. Rapid, sharp breaths made your chest heave, too afraid to look up at those red eyes still fixated on whatever you kept hidden from him. He continued to pry your stubborn fingers open, ignoring your shaking whimpers. He squoze your wrist, the tendons aching and contracting until your fingertips began to lift up. Any resistance was pretty much useless at this point, but dammit you still tried everything to worm out of his grip. But he had finally had it, you weren't gonna be keeping secrets from him. Now your last finger was pushed off, and he could see what was so damn important that you physically fought him to keep it secret. It was almost slow motion the way the strip spun to the ground, clattering down and landing beside his mud caked boots. He froze, slowly looking down at it. That's it? That's all you-...

You could barely read his face, so many different emotions flashing across it all at once. Occasionally he'd look back up at you, then back down at it. To the point you almost got annoyed that you were still being stuck to a wall while the reality set in. After all, it didn't take a rocket scientist to know what that was, just put you down already!

Paul looked at you still pinned beneath him, horrified at how he lost his temper and immediately released you. Still rubbing away the pain across your wrists, you watched him pick it up. A wave of guilt swarmed your body, you didn't know whether to hug him or punt him in the chest.

Hell, a massive tidal wave of guilt overflowed him too. It'd been such a long time since he got that angry.. but worst of all he'd never been like that with you. Never grabbed you so forcefully and ignored your pleas, it was a dark side of him he never wanted to display in front of you. Glancing at the little pink plus at the end of the stick, his mind swirled with a plethora of questions. But slowly he stood up, looking down at you still really trying to process everything that had happened in the past few minutes. "I don't… I don't understand.."

"You- You are such an ass," you shouted out of nowhere, enough that it made him jump. There you were. That's the fiery girl he knew, not the one he exactly wanted to be on the opposing side of at the moment, though.

Paul wasn't surprised you were pissed, but he definitely didn't expect you to start punching his arm. Again. Then again, and again you just kept hiting his arms, his chest, pushing and crying, you were so mad you wanted to chuck him in the ocean! It didn't really hurt that much, but he felt awful he drove you to that point.

Tears blurred your vision as you lashed out on him. All you could do was yell names between sobs, even whack him with your purse. "Paul, you absolute jerk! Butt! Jackass! You smarmy, half wit, blood-sucking tool! You said you were packing blanks, you absolute liar! I was gonna tell yo-! I mean, I know I shouldn't have run-! But you just couldn't wait- and then Marko- and you! You ! Jerk ! Butthead !"

"Hey, ow! Ow! Ow, dammit! I know, I know I went to far-ow not the hair dammit," he demanded, grabbing your arms before you could lay another mighty blow. "Babe! Babe, stop! I thought I was! I swear I didn't know- I-..I never thought that I could get you...." His hands slowly released your shoulders, moving to your hips. "I'm so sorry, baby. I swear, I didn't know.. I'm so sorry."

The way his voice softened only made you want to cry more. This whole day was a mess. You didn't mean to try and run.. You never should've tried to in the first place. God, you were so tired. All this running around, all this secrecy, the fighting, it was exhausting. Paul was the last person you wanted to fight. Sure you had spats and a few heated arguments. Every couple did, even vampires. But this, it was just so.m draining. With a firm thud you plopped your forehead on his sternum, your fingers tightly clinging to the upper sleeves of his jacket. "Wh-what am I supposed to do-… what are we supposed to do now..?"

Paul pondered his options with a solemn face, but there was only one that made him happy. Only one that sat right in his heart. What else could he possibly do, there was only ever going to be one answer even if you told him right away. Most of all, he couldn't stand the sorrow in your eyes. A frown never suited such a beautiful face. He never expected there to be anything to come from your heavy sexcapades, it never seemed like there was any risks in it. He'd never seen a vampire munchkin, least of all he'd never even heard of a vamp conceiving with a human. All he knew now is you, crying in his arms, terrified of what you were carrying. What it could mean. In that moment, he steeled his resolve and came to a final decision.

Silently he tilted your chin up, using his thumb to brush away all those tears staining your cheeks. Those blue eyes, you could get lost in them. Swallowed up by the sea. It wasn't hard to read his mind when he held onto your hip with one hand, while the other that pushed away salty droplets now cupped your cheek. Within moments you crashed your mouth into his, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck.

Warm. A surge of heat filled your body. It was the first time you felt truly alive all day. You could feel your chest heave against his, you didn't want any space between the two of you and only pressed tighter until there wasn't anything left. Each kiss gave momentary breath before you dove in for more. Neither of you could stop. You didn't want to pull away, not even for a split second. The way he smelled, the way he tasted, the way he touched you, the way he felt beneath your fingers; it made your head spin. His hands began to wander, you clutched at anything you could get a hold of. Your body burned, so sweet and long. In those moments the world stopped, it just melted away in streams of light. No one was there but you two. 

It was over too soon, both of you rapidly panting for breath still intertwined. Oh, how you could stare into his eyes forever.

That frown was long gone, replaced by a tender smile. The one he had come to cherish. Paul chuckled softly, breathlessly nuzzling against your collar bone. Slowly he leaned in close to your ear, his disheveled blonde hair brushing up against your cheeks. Lips trailed up flesh, reavhing just beneath your ear. And then you heard those three forbidden words. Such sweet, tender words, you hadn't expected him to say. Although he whispered them so softly they might have gotten lost in the wind, to you they were as clear as the moon on a cloudless night.

"Y/N.... I love you."

It made your heart throb, you thought you might even faint. A lifetime of struggles led up to this beautiful moment. You never expected it to be a half-undressed heavy make out session with your vampire lover, the father of your unborn spawn, in the back alley of a record store on the Santa Carla Boardwalk. But here you were, nestled between him and an old brick wall. Paul loved you, he had said it, he finally said those words that could destroy any doubt you had. And more than anything in the whole wide world, you knew once and for all, you loved Paul.

[ultfreakme]

I was thinking about how Cora escaped the fire and I tried to think of a feasible explanation for it at 2AM so this may not be coherent but it’s an idea for Cora’s story. 

Cora probably broke curfew to go out playing in the backyard of the woods as acurious 11 year old and wandered off a little too far on the night of the fire. Then she smells smoke and returns, sees everything burning down and is confused and she;s crying, anguished, terrified, but a hunter with Kate finds her and let’s say he’s sympathetic enough to pull her aside and say “all your family is dead, all of them, if you want to live, then run and never look back.”

So she does. She runs. 

And she manages to get to Satomi’s territory maybe? Let’s say she does know that Derek and Laura made it, but she knows that the hunters will only try to put them down and Derek and Laura wouldn’t be able to protect Cora. Plus, Derek & Laura probably cut off all communication and just RAN. So no communication+ defenseless youngin wolves whose location is now vanished + bloodthirsty hunters= bad news for Cora’s survival rates. Satomi wants to protect the only chance at survival for the Hales and just...sends her off. She doesn’t expect Derek & Laura to survive.  Satomi has her own pack to protect as well. The Hales are old guards of Beacon Hills, if such an illustrious pack is destroyed so easily, maybe she’s scared of that happening to her own? So she puts her own pack first thus leaving the remaining Hales to fend for themselves. It all probably happens very fast, in the span of 4-5 days. People have yet to know for real if Derek, Laura and Peter survived, Cora’s a child, terrified, threatened by hunters and her memory of the events are a little wonky.

So she goes on thinking she’s the only Hale until canon happens. 

Even this doesn’t make complete sense but it’s better than nothing. 

[randomvarious]

Today’s compilation:

Big Shiny Tunes 2 1997 Alternative Rock / Pop-Rock / Big Beat

Just a little explainer up front before I long-windedly go on to deliver the craziest fact about this comp. MuchMusic was a Canadian music television station that was like MTV in a lot of ways, but appeared to have a little bit of a broader range of genres since it paid a lot more mind to electronic music than MTV ever did. Plus, while it also aired a lot of music that was popular in America at the time, it also provided a sizeable platform for Canadian artists, too. And it aired in the States as well, but unfortunately, like most Americans who had it in their cable package, I never paid much attention to it, and I don't know how many Americans out there knew that it was actually Canadian. I know I didn't when I was a kid. However, I do have memories of seeing both the music videos for Groove Armada's "I See You Baby" and Fatboy Slim's "Star 69" on there and not really knowing what to think besides the fact that they never played that kind of shit on MTV.

Now for the crazy fact: this silly comp, which now just serves as a primo, mid-to-late 90s nostalgia trap that mixed über popular pop-rock and alt-rock tunes with lesser-known Canadian acts, is currently the third-bestselling album in Canadian history since Canada embraced the Nielsen SoundScan system. It trails only behind Shania Twain and Céline Dion and has sold 1.223 million copies as of 2020.

But you're probably thinking, 1.223 million is a lot, but it's really not that many for 1997. Well, you're wrong. Considering what the population of Canada was back then, about 4% of the country owned this album. And you know the large majority of parents weren't indulging in it—they were the ones buying Shania and Céline—so if you think about it, so many Canadian kids and early twenty-somethings actually owned this album.

Still not convinced though? Well, do you know what the bestselling album of 1997 was in America? The Spice Girls' Spice. Know how many copies it moved? 5.3 million. Know what percentage of Americans that was? 1.9%. And four percent of Canadians owned Big Shiny Tunes 2, so, proportionally, this silly compilation managed to sell more than two times as many copies as the Spice Girls' second album did in the States. That's just astronomical, monoculture-level-type shit, especially when you consider the fact that it was probably mostly youngins who actually owned it. We're talking the Canadian music-equivalent of, like, the fucking Tomagotchi here.

And in the end, Big Shiny Tunes 2 isn't even really that remarkable of a comp. It's just a reproduction of 90s rock radio hits and heavily rotated music videos, but with a little bit of a Canadian twist. "Hello Canadian child! You know all those songs that you listen to all the time? Well, how would you like the ability to listen to them all the time?!"

Still though, as a nostalgia junkie myself, this comp rips, and as a non-Canadian listening to it over two decades after it was first released, there's a couple Canadian tunes on here that are great, like Bran Van 3000's "Drinking in L.A.," which I'll admit I've actually heard plenty of times before, although it never played on US top 40 radio in 1997 as far as I can remember, and The Age of Electric's "Remote Control."

So, if you're a Canadian who's reading this and had consciousness in the 90s, you probably owned this album, and hopefully this makes for a nice dose of nostalgia for you. And if you had consciousness in the 90s, but you're not a Canadian, well then, this is probably both a nice trip down memory lane and also a little bit of an education for you, too.

Highlights:

The Prodigy - "Breathe (edit)" Blur - "Song 2" Third Eye Blind - "Semi-Charmed Life" Smash Mouth - "Walkin' on the Sun" Sugar Ray feat. Super Cat - "Fly" Bran Van 3000 - "Drinking in L.A." Marilyn Manson - "The Beautiful People" Bush - "Swallowed" Matchbox Twenty - "Push" The Chemical Brothers - "Block Rockin' Beats" Radiohead - "Paranoid Android" The Age of Electric - "Remote Control" Stone Temple Pilots - "Lady Picture Show"

[hmmdotjpg]

Ok so some of you expressed interest in hearing abt Rolfe and mitzi’s strained relationship so here we go, excuse the cruddy doodles from last night

Rolfe is a naturally jealous person (haha me too oops), that’s basically canon. Moving on to my hc, I hc that he, fatz, dook, and beach were the first 4 members of rae when it was practically nothing more than a half baked concept, ripping off the WP5. Rolfe has never been very musically inclined and preferred to be the comedian of the group, putting his ventriloquist skills to use while the others banged out the tunes. That’s how it was supposed to stay.

Then Mitzi managed to worm her way into the band. Or rather the other three Rae members decided that they should let their childhood friend into the band. Mitzi was a good 3 years younger than everyone in the band at the very least, and was still underdeveloped vocally.

Rolfe immediately, and irrationally, began to fear that his position as the “non singing part of the band” would be threatened by this new young mouse and that he’d be kicked out in favor of her. Luckily for him, and unluckily for her, she was not a fantastic singer out of the gate.

Until 1982.

Mitzi ditched her cruddy impression of Mini Mozzerella (I hc them as sisters) and found her own voice, which we all know is one of the best in the band and of all animatronic pizza characters, period.

Suddenly, this Uber talented youngin is smashing every song she’s in and is drawing in mad attention from young kids, aka ROLFE’S target audience. PLUS she’s got some attitude in her and has a good sense of humor, making her more versatile and favorable than Rolfe, which doesn’t bode well for Mr Jealous Dewolfe

Rolfe’s whole shtick is digging on himself through Earl, but he sure does dig other band members, too. So, Rolfe tries to bring Mitzi down and drag her audience away via being a dick to her. What a charmer, that Rolfe.

Mitzi, of course, has no idea why Rolfe went from being nice-ish to her to being an asshole, and thus beings the strained relationship

MORE COMING SOON IF YOU WANT H