#i made a vow to be so tough that he could never call me soft again

[tartt9]

no thoughts head empty but jamie definitely took home a girl the night of the gala bc he would've cried about keeley breaking up with him if he hadn't and "men don't cry"

[lokiiied]

!!

are we gonna talk about the two characters to clock zava's fucked up behavior (jamie and rebecca) also being the two characters to have experienced abuse from charismatic and popular men in the past

[walnutmistjamie]

These aren’t my first boots or anything. My mum gave ‘em me. She was the one who got me into football in the first place. Her and me dad split up when I was just a sexy little baby. She’s the reason I work so hard. Just wanted to make her proud. She doesn’t even care if I’m any good. Just wants me to be happy. Be a good lad. Once I got good though, me old man started showing up, didn’t he? You know, bragging to all his mates every time I scored a goal. Calling me "soft" if I didn’t… dominate, you know. And I hated that. I actually fucking hated that. So, I made a vow to be so tough that he could never call me « soft » again. I wonder if sometimes… I forget about making her proud. I don’t think that she would be lately.

[coyoteprince]

Some thoughts on the masculine side of my gender experience and how it ties into vulnerability

I am nonbinary, I believe some flavor of fluid, but I just read as a goth cis woman to the layperson. That's fine and good, there is a safety and privilege in being stealth even with the alternative way I dress, but there also feels like a safe with something precious I keep locked away in me.

I take comfort in referring to myself as a "woman with a man's personality" and likening myself to a kelpie or nymph: beautiful, soft, but merely a vision of a woman: in reality underneath the gossamer, a beast that fails man's words.

Occasionally, something stirs to life in me, similar but different: those feelings of masculinity. I am naturally positioned by my genes (I can grow a shitty sparse beard) and temperament to have some secondary features- but thats it.

And yet, when the pangs of longing ache, they come on suddenly and harsh and I feel trapped.

There is nothing I can truly do to feel comfortable with the swing of identity. Only shapeshifiting back and forth could satisfy me which is impossible. Yes, I could seek hormones or surgery, but I have decided for now to not for a variety of reasons. As part of that, I've always been rather... defensive and secretive about the masculine part of my identity. I have a secondary masculine name I only allow people I trust to call me, and this dumb tumblr post is the first time I'm admitting some rather personal things to the public eye.

I'm well aware today many won't respect the nature of my gender just because I am a ~nonbinary girl~ and not seeking permanent transition, but even before that the thought of being trans was too much for me.

The first time I realized I was trans I wasn't older than 15 and noticed the thoughts I was experiencing about wanting to feel like a boy. It frightened me so bad that I vowed to never give it attention again specifically because I already knew I was queer, mentally different, being abused, and "didn't need another target on my back". Haha. Hahaha

Ignoring those thoughts hasn't been too hard except when I see the ghost of my identity. Then it is overwhelming, like a wave crashing over me and threatening to sweep me into the tide. Painful and exhilarating all at once. Before I know it, it's gone again.

I read and watched The Outsiders in middleschool, as did many. I latched onto Johnny, a greaser kid with an abusive family who tried to play tough but was really just an incredibly scared, sweet runt. I couldn't for the life of me figure out why I identified so hard with him but hindsight is 20/20. Despite the hamminess of Outsiders, I continue to hold a fondness.

Later, when I became comfortable with my nonbinary ID (something that was quite difficult for me) and an adult, I saw another ghost. A theme now set: soft hearted greasers. The first time I heard this I curled up and couldn't stop replaying it even though it made my chest ache.

Finally, the last ghost I've seen and what really made it all click for me was Izzy.

I was neutral of Izzy for the first season (sorry my old man fucker peers), but seeing him become disabled and starting to soften made me intrigued. Then, the drag scene and him singing: I yelped in excitement, bewilderment, and bawled like never before. It was the most intense gender euphoria I've ever felt. Izzy shot to the top of my favorite characters ever in an instant with all he grew to embody.

I guess I identify with boys clad in leather, forced to become rugged in all the wrong ways. Underneath, a natural softness terrified but desperate to show itself.

You can see this in Waite, too: A handsome, dark man who is oh so soft underneath. It's no secret that in my story over time he accepts his nonbinary identity and allows his truth to be seen framed by carnations and frill. Perhaps he is what I wish I was.

On the other hand, Degare is somewhat closer to my reality. A gender all his own, effeminant masculine mannerisms, fairly feminine dress, breasts and vagina and all- though he is still often more masculine than how I present. In contrast to Waite's uneasy fear of judgement, he tries to guard his natural softness rather aggressively out of fear of being taken advantage of.

I'm sure to many reading this I sound like a transmasc "egg" that hasn't cracked yet. To others, very mentally ill. Maybe to some who are fluid, they know the wish-washy feelings.

Either way, I'm a proud freak and I've worked hard to not allow others to hold power over how I view myself anymore. These past 4 years through a cocktail of treatments (though meditation and practice have been the biggest game changers) I've diligently learned how to balance being openly loving to all and authentic- yet protecting my energy and staying sure of my identity no matter another's opinion. Misery loves company and bitter, paranoid gossips and I no longer get along.

Softness, kindness, vulnerability for others and yourself are all difficult, at times seemingly impossible things to achieve when you come from a harsh upbringing and live in a world bombarded by bad news. Change in your view and behavior is excrusiating. But I believe striving for authenticity and love is the most important thing we can do as humans in this life.

Whether I end up transitioning down the line or staying as I am, I've learned to cherish these flashes of masculine desire and be empowered by vulnerability- and I don't regret it.

[reina-writes]

LATE NIGHT CALLS. Pedro Pascal x reader [Hi, it's me -series, #1]

Summary: Pedro sends a reassuring voice message to you, showing that sometimes it's not about what you say but how you say it.

Characters: Pedro Pascal x reader Warnings: None really. Pedro being sweet, mention of reader having a bit rough day. A/N: This is a short fanfic, being part of my "Hi, it's me" -series with Pedro, collection of simple, short fanfics. This series with short fanfics is inspired after having a dream about Pedro leaving a comforting voice message. I wanted to explore more his character and improve my own writing. I usually don't write anything with a real person, but this time I made an expectation. Pedro is so sweet. I will ensure that the fanfic remains tasteful and respectful towards the real person. Part 2: MISSED CALL.

**********

It was late at night, and Pedro was sitting alone in his hotel room. He had just finished a long day of interviews and promotional events, and he was feeling exhausted. But despite his weariness, there was one thing on his mind that he couldn't ignore: you.

He missed you so much it hurt. You had been friends for a while now, and there was a mutual attraction, but you had never taken the next step into dating. Pedro respected your wishes and didn't want to push you into anything that you weren't ready for, but it was getting harder and harder to keep his feelings to himself.

As he lay in bed, scrolling through his phone to check what he had missed during the work, he saw you had sent him a voice message earlier. As Pedro listened to the voice message, he couldn't help but smile at the sound of your voice. He closed his eyes, picturing you.

"Hi Pedro, it’s me! How's everything going with your work? I hope you're doing great. I miss you and can't wait for you to be back home. Movie nights aren’t the same without you.”

You sounded cheerful, but he could tell there was an attempt to mask the weariness in your words.

“Uh… Life's been a bit tough lately, feeling like I'm being pulled in every direction. I really could use your shoulder to lean on and have a good cry. And after that, maybe a bottle of wine? Haha, sorry for venting, I'm just a little bit exhausted."

Your laughter was bittersweet, a mixture of genuine amusement and a hint of vulnerability. Pedro's heart ached at the thought of your struggling, wanting to be there to comfort you.

“Anyway, I know you’re busy. Just remember to rest whenever you have a chance, okay? Sending you hugs and kisses. I miss you. Bye!"

Pedro took a deep breath, composing himself before recording his response. He knew you would be already sleeping – or at least he hoped you would be sleeping because a goodnight sleep hopefully would make you feel better.

"Hey, it's me," he began, his voice soft and gentle. "I’m sorry for answering this late, I just got back to the hotel. I heard your message, and I want you to know that I'm thinking of you and that I'm here for you, baby.” He paused for a moment, gathering his thoughts. He wanted to say so much more, but he didn't want to risk scaring you off.

“I know things have been tough lately, but I want you to know that you're not alone. Whatever you're going through, we'll get through it together. You're strong and capable, and I believe in you”, his voice was filled with warmth and reassurance as he spoke softly into the phone.

“And about that shoulder to lean on and the bottle of wine, well… Consider it a date when I'm back. I'll be there to wipe away your tears and have a bottle of wine with you. And meantime... Remember that I'm just a phone call away.”

Pedro hoped that his words would bring you some comfort, even from a distance. In that moment, he vowed to himself that he would do everything he could to make you feel loved and cherished, no matter the circumstances. 

“I hope you're getting some rest tonight," he continued. "And if you ever need anything, anything at all, just let me know. I'm always here for you, no matter what."

With a sigh, Pedro hit send and put his phone away, feeling a mix of anticipation and nervousness. The weight of his unspoken feelings lingered in the air, leaving him to wonder about the future. As he lay in the darkness, thoughts of you consumed his mind. He couldn't help but wonder: would you ever know how much you really meant for him? Would he someday be able to tell you a truth and not just making small hints? The uncertainty tugged at his heart, but deep down, Pedro knew that taking a leap of faith might be worth it. But right now, Pedro wanted nothing more than to be there for you, to support you through the ups and downs of life. One day, he thought, one day. He closed his eyes, holding onto the hope that someday he would be able to express his true feelings. For now, he would cherish the connection you had.

[bucknastysbabe]

hear me out: jon whimpers and whines during sex and he makes the cutest faces AND he has a heavy praise kink. Can you write something about him👀??

He’s such a bitch I just know it and NEED IT Jon would prob cum after calling him lord stark of winterfell in bed and cry about it later

Anyways I haven’t written about my fav thing ever inna while ✨~BJS~✨ Sorry for the wait, enjoy❤️

Ratings: Explicit

Tags: Jon snow x free folk!reader, twinky baby virgin Jon, oral(m!receiving), praise kink, he’s a noisy pup, she’s loving IT, soft soft soft, poor jon has so many issues from Catelyn

The crow who cried wilding

“What’s little lord crow doin’ about my tent?,” the free folk woman asked. Her friend, Talla laughed harshly, biting into some sinewy rabbit leg. She retorted, “You haven’t noticed him mooning over you at all?” The other woman grinning, sharpening her knife with a whetstone. Her eyes flickered up to meet the crow’s dark orbs.

His eyes flicked down and he darted away towards Mance’s encampment. She licked her lips, concocting a plan. Turning to Talla she hummed, “I bet he sounds as pretty as a songbird.” The elder guffawed, adding on, “For a tough lad, he’s about green as they come huh?”

She snickered at her friend, imagining the young Lord Commander sniveling and biting his pouty lips under her thighs.

Later on that night, she was retiring to her tent. The free folk, or so deemed wilding had enjoyed mead and merriment for the night. They had a long haul tomorrow— get away from the abominations up north. When the woman ducked to enter the fur lined tent a voice interrupted.

“E-excuse me my lady,” the crow, Jon, stuttered. You could almost pinch his cute cheeks. He stood, eyes averting your gaze, shifting his weight from foot to foot. The wildling chuckled, “I ain’t a lady, what’cha need Lord Crow?” Jon’s freshly shaved cheeks blushed up nicely, plump lips opening to say, “I’ve seen you around, you’re a wonderful spear wife. I wanted to get to know you.”

Putting a hand on your hip, she amusedly smiled and gave the shy lad her name. He stammered, “T-that’s pretty!” Cocking her head she stated, “Well, did you come here to recruit me or get your cock wet? I don’t have all night!” Jon made a soft noise, gloved hand drawing tight on that strange sword. He seemed to be fighting in his head.

In a softer tone she added, “Yer’ not a true free folk if you haven’t broken alllll of the vows. C’mon I’ll be easy, (my lord).” The crow nodded and darted inside, like he was hiding a big secret. Must be a kneeler thing, so devout to their rules and the idea of loyalty. She smiled at his red cheeks, admiring the way he gently put the sword aside and clasped his hands, dark orbs watching the woman intensely.

She pulled off her copious amounts of furs, baring skin in the dark tent. Jon’s breath hitched, his leathers squeaking softly. The wildling purred, “Yer’ a pretty one for a crow. Not one of those old grizzled ones or plump third sons,” she crawled towards the man, “Better lips than most maids.”

The dark haired man whimpered softly, letting her take off his inky cloak. She cooed more praises, making his blood heat up in a way he had never felt. When she shucked down his breeches Jon moaned, “I-I’ve never.” He could see her teeth glinting in the lowlight as she chuckled, “I know sweet lord. Don’t worry about a thing. Jus’ testing the ice.”

He murmured breathlessly, “You’re gorgeous.”

“Thank you, precious.”

Jon felt too hot again, her praises making his cock throb like crazy in the chilly air. He craved the compliments, made that aching hole created from his past tamp down. The spear maid wrapped a tough hand around his cock, pumping the strained flesh. Jon let out an agonized moan, biting down on his lip to be quiet.

She teased, “Can’t have anyone hear the Lord Crow crying like a bitch huh? S’okay we don’t care.”

She slid a thumb over his weeping tip, pressing her wind-bitten lips to his plump ones. Jon whined in his nose, opening up to her insistent pressure. Their mouths smacked together, Jon’s pathetic noises intermingling with her raspy sighs. He lapped at her tongue tentatively, beginning to pant from excitement. She returned the favor, allowing the kiss to get sloppier, wetter, messier.

He moaned into her heated embrace, soft lips already swelling from the pressure and her maddening little nips. Jon warbled her name when the wildling asked, “Ye’ ever got yer’ cock sucked, pretty little crow?” He shook his head dramatically, dark curls bouncing with the movement. She smiled and thumbed at the scars across his eyes, purring, “Yer in for some fun. I bet you cry pretty.”

Jon spasmed under her touch, begging with needy kisses and the subtle spread of his milky thighs. The bastard whined at the loss of her kisses, but quickly returned to ecstasy as she laid lush kisses down the hard, scarred lines of his body. One of her hands maddeningly stroked at the soft skin on Jon’s inner thighs.

She groaned lowly, lapping a fat stripe up Jon’s cock and continuing to dig into his weepy slit. Jon fell back like a chopped ironwood, calloused fingers digging into her crazy hair. He sucked in a breath, exhaling with the most wanton whine.

Pulling back slowly, she cooed, “Yess, that’s it baby crow, just let me take care of ye.”

She moved back to bob on his throbbing length, hollowing her cheeks and stroking the rest. The tent filled with lewd slurping, making the tips of Jon’s even flush up. He held back from shoving himself down the wildling’s throat, instead writhing in place. Jon rambled, “Others take me- s’good. You’re s’good.”

The spearmaid smiled around him, slurping up excess spit and suckling on the fat tip. The hand stroking him swirled right underneath the tip, making the Lord Commander shake and mewl. His brows were pinched, plump bottom lip trapped between his teeth. Jon knew he was getting close, body trembling and singing with pleasure. His lower belly was tight and getting tighter.

She pulled back again for a breath, breathlessly sighing, “Oh my sweet crow, I’m stealing you away fer’ myself. Can’t have such a pretty maid unprotected like this. All mine, boy.” Jon babbled, “Yes, yesyes, let me be yours! I’ll be good to you!” She hummed against his twitching cock, hot breath fanning out, “I know you will. Sweetie.”

When her perfect mouth enveloped Jon again he arched into the touch, whining even louder,

praising the woman in a broken crack. His thighs twitched, cock pulsed. When her lithe fingers pulled at Jon’s heavy balls he came apart with a elongated shout of her name. She pulled off and jacked his hot spend onto her belly, praising Jon again. She cooed, “There we go, got ye all relaxed huh? My baby is always gonna feel good.”

Jon whimpered, blinking away tears. He warbled, “You will always have me?” The wilding whispered with a gentle kiss, “Always sweet crow.” She wiped away his spend carefully, smiling and leaving more praises and pet names. Jon floated happily, sighing in pleasure, clinging to the powerful woman.

[lokiiied]

oh, nothing i’m just deeply analysing the character song choice for roy kent showing up to work in colour for the first time. not much there tbh

past the mills. we saw a fucking windmill

tall, handsome man, in a dusty black coat.

he’ll wrap you in his arms, so that i could do this tell you that you’ve been a good boy.

rekindle all of those dreams it took you a lifetime to destroy. i made a vow, to be so tough that he could never call me soft again

he’s a god, he’s a man, he’s a ghost, he’s a guru he’s here, he’s there, he’s every fucking where they’re whispering his name across this disappearing land roy kent, roy kent

[picture-me-in-the-trees]

girls (gn) when “SHES THE REASON I WORK SO HARD. JUST WANTED TO MAKE HER PROUD. SHE DOESNT EVEN CARE IF IM ANY GOOD. SHE JUST WANTS ME TO BE HAPPY. BE A GOOD LAD. ONCE I GOT GOOD THOUGH, ME OLD MAN STARTED SHOWING UP DIDNT HE? BRAGGING TO ALL HIS MATES EVERY TIME I SCORED THE GOAL. CALLING ME SOFT IF I DIDNT DOMINATE, YOU KNOW. AND I HATED THAT. I ACTUALLY FUCKING HATED THAT. SO I MADE A VOW TO BE SO TOUGH THAT HE COULD NEVER CALL ME SOFT AGAIN. I WONDER IF SOMETIMES I FORGET ABOUT MAKING HER PROUD. DONT THINK THAT SHE WOULD BE LATELY.”

GIRLS WHEN IT WAS NEVER ABOUT HIS DAD. IT WAS ALWAYS FOR HIS MOM. ALWAYS TO MAKE HER PROUD. SHE LOVED AND SUPPORTED HIM UNCONDITIONALLY AND ONLY WANTED HIS HAPPINESS. JUST WANTED HIM TO BE A GOOD PERSON. GIRLS WHEN GEORGIE AND JAMIES RELATIONSHIP AS A WHOLE BECAUSE IT GENUINELY MEANS SO MUCH TO THEM

GIRLS WHEN JAMIE STARTS THE ‘RICHMOND TIL WE DIE CHANT’ LATER IN THE EPISODE BECAUSE HES LEGITIMATELY A PART OF THE TEAM NOW. A TEAM PLAYER.

GIRLS WHEN SEASON ONE JAMIE TARTT AND JAMIE TARTTS CHARACTER ARC.

[lauranthalasah]

Things I've noticed on my rewatch of Ted Lasso 5/?

Season 1 Episode 6 Jamie: These aren't my first boots or anything. My mum gave 'em me. She was the one who got me into football in the first place. Her and me dad split up when I was just a sexy little baby. She's the reason I work so hard. Just wanted to make her proud. She doesn't even care if I'm any good. Just wants me to be happy. Be a good lad. Once I got good though, me old man started showing up, didn't he? You know, bragging to all his mates every time I scored a goal. Calling me "soft" if I didn't... dominate, you know. And I hated that. I actually fucking hated that. So, I made a vow to be so tough that he could never call me "soft" again. I wonder if sometimes... I forget about making her proud. I don't think that she would be lately. Season 2 episode 10 Dani: Where do you get dress shoes? Colin: I don't have time to stand in line at midnight and wait till morning to buy new shoes. Jamie: You don't have to do that for shoes like these, mate. Nobody wants them. (His delivery here was charged as hell too) This might be my lack of english understanding, but it seems to me that Jamie has experience with funerals, and I’m not sure his mom is still alive, that “I don’t think that she would be lately” always sound weird to me, like, is she dead or they don’t talk anymore? I don’t know, again, it might be that I’m missing some idiomatic aspect here. I guess I will see as I’ve seen some posts about a certain scene in the trailer.

[f1nalboys]

also it’s so good to see the stark difference in s1 jamie to s3 jamie in how he handles people talking badly about him/the team :,) he knows that people r going to say stuff regardless, no matter what, and the way he’s easily able to sway the team into not feeling so bad in s3 ep1 is a far cry from how he reacts anytime in s1!

ALSO when jamie is throwing his shoes in the fire pit thing and says “i made the vow to be so tough he could never call me soft again” vs his dad calling him a pussy and jamie punching him and flinching when roy hugs him…..yeah let me have my breakdown really quick

something i find interesting about jamie tartt is that in s1, after their first loss, he’s genuinely shocked when ted brings him into his office to talk to him and compliments him. he’s ready for ted to tell him what he did wrong in the game and seems taken aback and actually unsure of what to say or do after ted tells him that he’s a great soccer player and that he just needs to be a team player.

it’s also interesting right after he leaves when the others r celebrating (which he denies himself both the bonding experience with the team/and the cake which he views as a reward that he doesn’t deserve) and trent asks how he feels, he says exactly what ted does and you can tell that he does agree with it, but then he’s taken over by the anger at his loss and talks about how they’re throwing a party.

we all know his dad sucks, but this is the first hint of his character and how he was treated we got. he lost and he doesn’t deserve to be complimented or celebrated and he thinks that’s the norm. we even see it after he wins at man city when his dad berates and hits him for passing the ball.

jamie can win but he doesn’t think he deserves to be celebrated if he didn’t do it all himself bc that’s the narrative pushed at him.

[witch-hazels-musings]

Hazelllll Hi bestie 🤗

Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, listen Linda, listen:

Thoma with The Sun, The Lovers, and the Wheel of Fortune

I’m so excited to see what you come up with 🥰

The Sun (refreshed souls), The Lovers (soul mates), Wheel of Fortune (new beginnings) :: Thoma x gn reader | Destined Fate 

warning: fluff, sfw - romantic, meet-cute mention - (a-n: this made me cry from how soft it is T>T)

The contender for the best day of your life was tough to beat. 

First, you counted the day you went out on your own, made a place for yourself in this world. It was a day of great accomplishment and pride; to grab your freedom and autonomy by the reigns and push forward. The second was the day you met Thoma. It was unexpected, a happenstance encounter you would spend weeks fussing over. It was amazing he continued to talk to you after the clumsy way you introduced yourself. Falling, tumbling, wailing as you fell into his arms only to profusely apologize and, in the end, dash down the street before you could tell him your name. 

The third was the day he told you how he felt. The joy you experienced was one you were certain couldn’t be matched. Until you encountered the fourth instance and top contender of the best day of your life. The day he asked you to marry him. 

Today though, as he carried you through the threshold of your home, lips pressed tenderly against your cheek with a smile that couldn’t fade, his voice calling you by your newly appointed title; this was by far, without question, the best day of your life. 

“Are you ever going to put me down?” You cooed against him as his nose pushed against your neck, his hands gripping you tighter. 

“Nope.” Thoma’s voice tickled your skin, his breath warming you as it spread across your neck. He was standing in the middle of the living room, arms holding you carefully as he slowly swayed back and forth. There wasn’t any music, at least, not anymore, but it seemed a song played in his head as he kept you floating. 

You couldn’t believe this was true. That after all this time of wondering, worrying, contemplating if you’d ever end up in a place this perfect, you were having a hard time accepting this as anything more than a dream. 

Clearly you remembered the day he proposed, you remembered the days before and the events of your wedding. How sweet and perfect he looked when you walked down that isle to meet him. The tears in his eyes as he accepted your hand and escorted you up the final steps. How the smile you’d fallen in love with never left his lips the whole time you spoke your vows or when he stumbled over his with nervous laughter. You recalled it all in an instant but living in those moments felt like forever. To hold him as you danced to the song that would be yours. To share with him the first meal of newly bound spouses. To watch as he slipped the ring over your finger. A symbol to never betray you. 

He gave himself to you and you did the same. A promise of trust, commitment.  Forevermore. 

“Thoma.” You hummed his name, sighed at the way he pressed his forehead to yours, felt the tears in your eyes and the breaths he took when you cupped his cheeks in your hands. The dampness of your fingers had never been so rejuvenating. “I love you.” 

Even in the dimly lit room you could see how his face scrunched up as he tried to keep his emotions in check. “I love you, too.” He whispered, lips rising into a smile as he lifted you closer. Your arms slid around his neck, fingers disappearing in the soft locks of his hair. 

“Welcome home, husband.” 

“I’m home.” 

The sound of your shared emotional giggles filled the room. It brought a color to the space that only true love could create and it lasted long after rich ring of your laughter faded, it lingered long after the evening drew to dawn, it resonated for an eternity in the hearts that brought it life. 

Thoma was the sun, he was the stars in your sky and his existence painted the heavens with a beauty you’d never known. He was your present and your future. He was your fate, your destiny. 

Thoma was your ‘meant to be’ and you, without question, were his new beginning. 

Fate Made Event (May8-31) | Anthology

[theimprobabledreamersworld]

“I’ll be damned if i don’t make you smile at least once today.” or “You could punch me in the face and i would still want you ngl.” with Dukexiety 👉🏼👈🏼?

Hehe, I liked both of those too much... So I present both prompts in one story!

Hope you like it Vin 💚🖤💚

Writing taglist: @red-imeanblue @lost-in-thought-20 @jwillowwolf

Warnings: A couple of suggestive remarks and one count of swearing.

I'll Always Want You

Today was a working overtime day for Virgil. The anxiety function was constantly on the go since Thomas was auditioning for a new show. He had to make sure that the pre-audition nerves were at full capacity so he could then ease up at the last minute and let Roman take over.

Thomas got to the audition two hours early which made Logan happy because it meant that he was organised, but it meant that Virgil had to continuously come up with new material in order to keep Thomas on edge. It was his job after all, but he was glad that he wasn’t seen just as that anymore. Thomas’ name was finally called and Roman took centre stage, patting Virgil on the shoulder as he did so.

Virgil exhaled and slumped over as the exhaustion took over. He was going to need at least two… maybe three days to recover from this. He walked back to his room; each step heavier than the last. He could feel irritation and frustration radiate through him, and he hoped that no-one would see him until he had some sleep, especially not his boyfriend… Virgil knew that he could be pretty mean when he was over-exhausted.

He opened his door after about three attempts of doing so, and immediately collapsed on the bed. Virgil sighed and felt his eyes begin to close as his head sank on the pillow. That was until his door was kicked open which woke him up with a jolt.

“C’mon Lazy Bones! What are you still doing in bed? And without me, might I add.” Virgil groaned as he pushed himself up to see Remus leaning against the doorframe wiggling his eyebrows suggestively at his final statement. Virgil collapsed back onto the bed as he heard Remus’ footsteps approach him.

“It would be unwise to be in my company right now, Dukey.” Virgil attempted to be threatening but he was too tired to really try. He jolted again as Remus threw himself on the bed and wrapped his arms around Virgil tight.

“Since when have I ever been wise, Spiderboy?” Remus asked while peppering kisses all over Virgil’s face causing him to laugh in response and groan at the fact that he wasn’t being allowed to sleep. He turned around and buried his head in Remus’ chest which caused Remus to chuckle in response.

“The only person that should be making you this tired is me.” Remus muttered as Virgil looked up at him and smiled.

They fell into a comfortable silence as Remus stroked his hair, this is a side of him that was only reserved for Virgil. He vowed that no one else would ever know that he could be sweet and sentimental… He had a reputation to uphold after all. Even though Virgil couldn’t help but tease him on occasion, he didn’t mind keeping it between them. It made it more special. He felt Remus place two fingers under his chin and lift it up, smirking at the soft smile on Virgil’s face.

“There we go.” Remus said softly, and Virgil raised an eyebrow in confusion. Remus wrapped his arms around Virgil tighter, pulling him closer. “I know it’s been a tough day for you Vee Vee. So I’ll be damned if I don’t make you smile at least once today.” Virgil smiled even more as a response, he took one of Remus’ hands off his back and held it in his own.

“I’ll never understand why you want me sometimes.” Virgil sighed, Remus frowned at the statement and sat the two of them up so he could look Virgil in the eyes.

“Vee… Of course I want you. I want you more than anything else! Hell! You could punch me in the face, and I would still fucking want you, not gonna lie... So don’t ever think that, okay?” Virgil stared into Remus’ eyes, the brown with flecks of green and gold dancing with sincerity. Virgil nodded; a silent promise being made.

Remus smiled and pulled them both back down onto the bed, finally letting a more relaxed Virgil sleep soundly.

[lonely-lost-soul]

Under the Floorboards pt. III

(Technoblade x Reader): Pt. I, Pt. II, Pt. III, Pt. IIII

     From that day on Tommy stayed with you and Technoblade in your collective house, Technoblade tried to establish some ground rules but Tommy being Tommy refused to listen to any of them. He was dead set on building a cobblestone tower as well as taking all of Technoblade’s golden apples instead of eating the golden carrots that were graciously given to him. Other than that, things seemed to be going okay for your little found family. Well, that was until Technoblade and Tommy got wind that a man named Dream was sniffing around the area. 

 Dream was an enigma to you, after hearing Tommy’s stories about the man you could only come up with two conclusions about him. One was that you had no idea what his motivations were in the first place and secondly you wanted to beat his ass for what he did to Tommy. As... unique as he could be at times no child deserved to be exiled and manipulated, it was disgusting. He was a sixteen-year-old boy who got caught up in too many wars and too much violence, you needed to protect him. So long as he was with you and Technoblade that’s what you planned on doing. That was what you silently vowed to yourself, even if Technoblade didn’t share the same sentiment. 

 Now, it seemed you were coming increasingly closer to voicing those feelings to the man himself. Tommy was shaking a little besides you he tried to look strong as Technoblade frantically told him to hide and splashed him with invisibility potions. He looked over at you next and grabbed your shoulders, he actually looked scared, which meant he wasn’t messing around. 

          “You need to hide too. God- there’s nowhere that he won’t check.” Technoblade mumbled, his brow creased, and he closed his eyes. “He CAN’T know about you! No one other than Tommy can, they’ll hurt you and-” Hesitantly you put your hands on his cheeks,  

         “Take a deep breath…” You said tenderly as he opened his eyes to lock with your own. “We’ll be okay, splash me with invis and I’ll stay by Edward, hopefully it’ll mask my particle effects.” He gave a worried nod; you pecked his lips tenderly to reassure him as he splashed you with the potion. Just in time too because a knock on the door sounded, for once Tommy was absolutely silent. You watched as a man who rivaled your boyfriend in size came through the door, your eyes widened at the white mask covering his face there was an almost haunting smile painted on it. You pressed your tongue against your teeth and watched him give a wave to your boyfriend. Even without seeing his face you could tell he was smirking coyly at him. Never one to be intimidated Technoblade gave him a casual greeting and their conversation about Tommy’s location began. You had to cover your mouth with your hands at one point to stop yourself from laughing as Techno began talking to ‘chat’ instead of talking to Dream. You watched as the masked man grew more and more angry at Technoblade’s antics, he began speaking about a favor and Techno reminded him that he believes in full reciprocity. At the end of the interaction, it took all of your strength not to punch Dream directly in his stupid masked face. Why the fuck did it sound like he wanted to murder a child? If Dream ever laid a finger on him again, he was personally going to feel your wrath. The potion wore off almost as soon as Dream disappeared over the hills, Techno immediately turned to Tommy anger written all over his face.

         “Where you eating my gapples that ENTIRE time?!” Tommy sputtered out an excuse about absorption and you watched Techno open the window and beckon Dream to come back. You gave Technoblade a look and he scoffed at you, 

          “I won’t let him hurt you again Tommy. I promise.” You swore looking down at him, and his face turned a little pink. Tommy cleared his throat and shook his head,

          “Thanks, Ms. Blade but I’m tough enough to fight him head on! Have no fear!” He pointed to himself with his thumb a proud smile adoring his face. You gave a little laugh and nodded in agreement, 

          “You definitely are. Thank you for reassuring me.” You hummed and his smile only seemed to widen, 

          “I’m more qualified to protect your girlfriend than you are it seems Technoblade.” 

 Technoblade looked unamused, his eyebrow twitching in distaste. “Tommy I literally hate you so much. You’re a nerd.” 

         “Play nice both of you.” You scolded them, “We have to work together and at least pretend to get along or it’s going to be a very long partnership.” They both nodded reluctantly, and Techno sighed tiredly, he ruffled your hair. The rest of the night was spent gathering some more food in hopes it would stop Tommy’s gapple eating tirade, it obviously wouldn’t but it didn’t hurt to try. After that all three of you turned in for the night, as both you and Technoblade were getting ready for bed he decided to speak up about the plan for the next day.

          “Tommy and I need to make a trek into L’manburg to find Phil and try to get my stuff back. I don’t want to leave you here alone considering what just happened today, but you also can’t come to L’manburg.” 

        “Bubs you know I’ll be fine here alone did we not just have this conversation?” You pinched his pointed ears, and he made a sound of protest. “I’ve got fighting skills, after all have you not been training me in the art of war?” You teased with a smirk, “I got this Blade.”

          “Okay, okay, okay.” He leaned forward and kissed you and you kissed him back without hesitation. You felt him squeeze your hand fondly before pulling away from you. “When we get back home, we’ll have a date night okay?” Technoblade whispered softly pressing his forehead to yours. 

          “Gonna be a bit hard with the raccoon boy snooping around.” You teased eyes sparkling in delight, 

         “I’ll send him on a quest for something or other. So, it’ll be just us, I swear.” The soft look on Technoblade’s face made your heart squeeze in your chest. He brushed your hair behind your ear, “I’ll make you dinner, and we can watch a movie.” 

          “Well don’t take too long then.” You sent a teasing wink his way and he smiled fondly back at you. You kissed him again pulling him down into the bed, you both bounced with a laugh. His pink hair hung down and framed his face gorgeously, his glasses slipped down his nose. You pushed them back up with your index finger and he went cross-eyed, “I’ll be looking forward to it.” 

 The next morning rolled around and after breakfast both boys reluctantly packed a bag with important things they needed for the day. Stepping outside with the two of them, Technoblade gave you a farewell kiss and you watched them disappear over the hills. They were most likely going to go cause problems for other people on purpose. Finally alone, you decided to check up on the nearby villages to see if they had any interesting trades that you and Techno could exploit. You slung a bag over your shoulder and placed a good portion of emeralds inside of it, you placed a few potions inside of the bag as well. As a precaution you also grabbed an axe and a sword, you had to be ready for anything after all. Shutting the door behind you, you started your trek through the snow-covered woods you heard the snow crunch under your boots and began to hum softly to yourself. You paused a moment and raised an eyebrow as you caught sight of a blue sheep wandering by, tilting your head to the side you approached it. 

        “Well, hey little guy.” You murmured reaching out and running your hand through the sheep’s soft wool. 

         “Oh, um excuse me!” A voice spoke from behind you, you jumped with a yelp as soon as you spun around you were met with a fully transparent man. He had a yellow sweater with a big gash in his torso, and a beanie resting atop his head. You tilted your head up and locked eyes with him, they were almost completely white.

 He was a ghost.

          “That’s Friend! She doesn’t really like others petting her but it’s okay because you didn’t know.” The ghost smiled; it was contagious as you felt yourself smiling back at him.

         “My bad, my names (Y/n). What’s yours?” 

         “Oh! I’m Ghostbur! It’s nice to meet you miss, I’ve never seen you around here before. Are you new to the SMP?” He tilted his head floating around you, almost as if to get a better look at you. You focused more on his name, Ghostbur, which means this was Wilbur Soot, ex-president of L’manburg, and ‘brother’ of Tommy and Technoblade. 

 You cleared your throat and rubbed the back of your neck. “No, I’ve lived in this area for a while, but I’m a wandering adventurer. I trade with the villages around here for interesting collectables stuff like that. I don’t do much of that now though.” You watched the ghost’s eyes widen a little,

          “That’s so cool!” He praised, “I bet you have a ton of cool stories.” 

          “Yeah, there’s been a few close calls, but I’ve made it back alive and well- oh shit no offense.” You winced a little and he laughed shaking his head, 

          “No worries it’s okay! I’m fine with being dead you know, no one really liked who I was alive, so this is better for everybody.” He puffed out his chest a little and a big smile spread across his face, that only caused you to frown. You reached out to try and touch him and your hand went right through the man, you both seemed to shiver at that, and he looked at you in shock. 

      “I’m sorry to hear that...that must be really hard.” Wilbur’s jaw dropped at your response, he floated around a bit awkwardly. If he wasn’t floating, he would’ve been shuffling on his feet in a nervous manner. 

       “N-No it’s…Wilbur was a horrible, horrible man.” He took a deep breath and began to throw some sort of blue substance on the ground in a rapid manner, you watched as he began to mutter and breath heavily. 

        “Woah, woah, woah I’m sorry don’t freak out!” 

         “I’m not, I'm okay see, see I’m fine and happy. Very happy with everything that’s going on so no worries okay! Here.” He tossed the blue substance at you and you collected it with a weary smile, “Have some blue it’ll make you feel better.” You thanked him quietly and you both stood there a bit uncomfortably that was until thunder rumbled overhead. “Oh no…I melt in the rain.” 

         “Here why don’t you come with me.” You smiled softly, “I know a place where you can wait out the storm.” 

          “Aw thank you.” Ghostbur clapped, “Friend can come too right?” 

          “Of course.” 

          “Good. Then lead the way.” He chirped as Ghostbur followed you back the way you came, now before you get too mad at yourself you should know that Technoblade had informed you that during his ‘execution’ Ghostbur had visited him at his home. If he didn’t share that information with you, you’d be never revealing Technoblade’s base. As the house appeared over the mountains the ghost looked over at you with a bright smile, “Oh! That’s my friend Technoblade’s house, do you live with him?”

         “I do.” You smiled fondly and watched his smile grow excitedly, “He’s helped me out quite a lot.”

         “That’s wonderful! Technoblade usually never helps people unless he likes them or if they can do something for him in return. You must be very special, are you two together?” He only had to glance at you for a moment before laughing excitedly, “You are! That’s wonderful!” Ghostbur chirped, clapping his hands as he phased through Technoblade’s door, officially safe out of the rain, turned snow. You had let Friend inside as well and Ghostbur continued talking “Tell me how you met, please, please, please.” Seeing how excited the ghost was you melted, he won your heart just like Tommy. However, you had to keep in mind his alive self-did blow up an entire nation and that couldn’t be just brushed away like he seemingly was trying to do, you can’t erase the past. You can only accept what happens, learn from it, apologize and grow. However, you didn’t see the harm in sharing how the both of you met so you began to retell the tale to Ghostbur, the entire time he had an almost bittersweet look on his face. 

         “I was married once...her name was Sally. She...left though. But I still had my son, Fundy and we did the best we could together.” Ghostbur said fondly his eyes softening,

         “I’m sorry...that must’ve been really hard for the both of you.” 

         “It’s alright! She was a salmon, so she was going to swim away eventually.” 

         “Like- like an actual salmon?”

          “Yes?” 

The silence that stretched into the room was deafening, you cleared your throat deciding not to dwell on the fact that the ghost in front of you very likely fucked a fish. You hoped to god she was some sort of shapeshifter, in fact that’s what you were going to believe. You managed to break the silence by asking about Fundy, and the way he gushed about him was nothing less than fatherly. It was sweet and you listened intently to him, Fundy seemed like a good kid, a bit quirky but you were dating a blood god so who were you to judge? Eventually the snow outside stopped and the sun began to peek out from behind the clouds. Ghostbur glanced out the window and decided it was time for him to head out with Friend. It was about midday and you were almost sad to see him go. 

 Alone again.

You still had hours to kill before Technoblade and Tommy reappeared, so you figured it was about time to start doing some chores. 

---

         “Ghostbur what’re you doing here?” Fundy murmured softly, looking over at the ghost with an exhausted expression. His ears were pressed back against his head, talking to the man who was once considered his dad always made him exhausted. Wilbur, or Ghostbur now, really was pitiful.

         “Can’t I visit you every once in a while!” Ghostbur hummed a smile plastered on his face as Fundy frowned. 

         “Preferably not. Plus...I’m a little busy right now I’m meeting up with Quackity and the Butcher Squad to talk about Techno again.” 

         “OH! Technoblade! I just spent the loveliest morning with his girlfriend, she was absolutely wonderful! She asked all about you and just adored Friend-”

         “Rewind, Technoblade’s what?” Fundy’s jaw dropped to the floor and he felt a hand on his shoulder, the young fox man stiffened. He looked to the side and saw Quackity besides him, Ranboo was next to him but Tubbo stood a little ways away. 

        “Yeah Ghostbur. Do continue.” Quackity grinned, his missing tooth sticking out from his last encounter with Toothpick. Ghostbur wilted a little bit and his eyebrows creased on his forehead, he fucked up didn’t he? 

        “I-um nothing actually I misspoke.”

        “Did he misspeak Fundy, cause to me it sounds like we have new leverage against Technoblade.” Quackity laughed a crazed look in his eyes, “Once again Ghostbur I have to thank you for the great information.” 

        “You’re welcome…” He murmured weakly, as Quackity stepped besides the ghost. 

        “Get your weapons boys, it’s time to pay the Technoblade household another visit.”

~~~

Hey guys! Pt. III is officially up! Technoblade’s livestreams huh? :) 

Also friendship with Tommy ended Ranboo’s my new favorite child.

As always I love your feedback thanks for reading! 

[goldenpogue]

What is Love

Drew Starkey x Reader (angst)

Summary: You and Drew used to have something. Although you thought you had moved on from it, you can't help reminiscing about the past. (recommend listening to say you won't let go by James Arthur and too good at goodbyes by sam smith while reading to add to the mood)

warning: sad alert, one cuss word, kinda long

Today was a special day for Madelyn and Chase, it was their wedding day. You couldn't express how excited you were for them. When Madelyn asked you to be one of her bridesmaids, you didn't hesitate to say yes. They decided to get married by the beach, in a nearby chapel. The chapel was surrounded by glass so you could see the ocean view. It was perfect. You wouldn't have missed this moment for the world. Her walking down the aisle and the amazed tears in Chase's eyes made this moment the most beautiful sight to see. You found yourself thinking about how you couldn't wait to be in this position. Newlywed, happy with the person you love- the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. Your eyes teared up at the thought. Spotting Drew looking at you from your peripheral vision, you chose to ignore him. Turning your attention back to the couple as they begin to state their vows.

Chase clears his throat and begins, "Before I met you I didn't think I'd find someone who matched me so well. Someone who understood every aspect of me, the good and the ugly." He let out a breathy chuckle before continuing as everyone let out soft laughs, "Even the parts of me that I don't even fully understand myself. I knew when I first saw you that you had to be the one. You truly are the other half that I never knew I needed and for that I promise, for you, I will aim for the stars and beyond to make you happy. Through thick and through thin, I'll be there. When things get tough, just look right beside you and I'll be right there."

You smiled faintly through your tears, taking in every word Chase said. You finally made eye contact with the one person you had been avoiding this whole time. You thought about how you first met, at a party Madelyn had invited you to come to. You two clicked and the rest of the party was spent getting shit-faced together. That night you ended up staying at his place and mostly throw up while he held your hair back. The next morning, he teased you about how you couldn't hold your alcohol as he made you breakfast. You couldn't help, but to smile as you knew you gained a bond that day you had never had with anyone else. As the days went by, you began to fall in love with him. Everything he did made you love him even more. Even the things he didn't like about himself, you loved.

Your smile fades away as you shake your head, shaking away the thoughts. You wipe your tears and take a deep breath as it's Madelyn's turn to give her vow. "Well, I don't know if I can beat that but I'll try," everyone laughs before going quiet again.

"I love you so much, I can say that every hour and it still won't add up to how much I really do. I love you with all my heart. I was afraid that I wouldn't find the person that would love me the same way I'd love them until I met you. The way you make my heart race, the way you give me butterflies, the way you make me smile is like no other. I am grateful to have you in my life. I will, from this day on, be your forever as you are my always. I'll hold your hand and walk with you through any obstacle that comes your way, and I promise I won't let go."

"I won't let go"- the same words he said to you on your first date. You went hiking in the forest, something you weren't to fond of doing at first because you didn't like the thought of insects and possible wild animals. However, being with him made you comfortable. He wanted to show you what he called "a beautiful sight", but you had to climb a bit to get there. While climbing over the ledge you slipped and scrapped your knee. He made sure you were okay and grabbed your hand. You were a little reluctant to continue after that until he reassured you. "It's okay. I won't let you fall again, I promise. I won't let go." He softly squeezed your hand as you nodded in agreement.

You started going on multiple dates after that and you assumed that meant the feelings you had were being reciprocated. The truth was far from it. You sadly didn't realize that 'til you saw her. His arm wrapped around her, the same way he wrapped it around you. His eyes looking at her, the same way he looked at you. In that moment, you questioned everything. Had it been one sided this whole time? He'd say no. He'd say he loved you, but you knew the truth. He may have loved you, just not the same way you loved him. You had accepted every gift and every loving word from him with devotion. His love to you was everything, but your love to him was replaceable.

Your thoughts are interrupted once more by the cheers of the crowd. You look up to see Madelyn and Chase kissing. Smiling, you start cheering along as Chase picks up Maddie up and begins walking down the aisle. Everyone follows them out of the chapel and Madelyn decides to throw her flowers towards you and the other bridesmaids as they get into their car. The flowers fall in your direction and you instinctively catch them. People around you cheer as you glance at him. He looks at you with a look of slight sadness and regret.

Sometimes you love people and they don't realize how amazing that is until they don't have you anymore. You have to learn to appreciate those people for the experience, but not to dwell on them. If they didn't appreciate you when you were around, they don't get to try after they hurt you. It's sad, but its true- they aren't worth it.

You turn to Maddison and hand her the flowers, "I think you deserve these more than me." She exchanges smiles with you and accepts them. You look at Drew one last time, your smile remaining as you turn to walk away.

Authors Note: thank you for reading.

[zodiyack]

Promises

Requested by anon: Omg hi again may I request a Sherlock Holmes x reader were they get married and have kids! Thank you <3

Pairing: Sherlock Holmes x Female!Reader

Warnings: One smut-indication?, funny angst, fluffity fluff, no proof-reading

Words: 1,953

Summary: (See Request)

Note: I’m making this a continuation of Reminders if that’s ok with you-

Taglist: @matth1w, @redspaceace-writes, @fandom-puff, @darling-i-read-it, @simonsbluee, @thewarriorprincessxo, @sebastianstanslefteyebrow, @missihart23, @beckster07890, @maan24

Masterlist | Henry Cavill Masterlist

Tears were shed, laughs were scattered, cheers were shouted. Sherlock had made good on his promise and married the lovely beautiful artist. He couldn’t stray his eyes from hers the entire wedding. It was difficult to even form words with how breathtaking the angel in front of him looked. Did they really expect him to say vows with this gift from the heavens standing right before him?!

Although Sherlock found it hard, he managed to spit out the words that caught in his throat. You’d hardly be able to tell he was a nervous wreck; the loving words that should bind them in mere moments came from his lips like poetry.

As soon as they were wed, Sherlock was eager to have his wife to himself. The entire after-party, he sat beside her with his leg bouncing impatiently, and that night he’d made love to her more times than they’d ever done in a week. A new record. He made it known that his promise was good.

What was to come after, though, was surely to be expected.

“Rin, stop moving sweetie.” She begged calmly for what felt like the thousandth time. Her youngest daughter fidgeted in the chair. She looked like a baby-doll propped up in an adults’ chair with how small she was. Painting her children was not uncommon for Y/n. They loved to model for their mother but most of the time her children could just barely stay still.

Their oldest, Eddie, a nickname for Edward, was goofy and had a heart like his aunt’s, both Enola and Eddie more child-like than times would prefer. Second oldest, Will Claud, short for William Claud, was determined, like his father, but had a habit of over doing it. He was the strict and ...well, the nerd brother. Will Claud just wanted to impress his father and mother, but he seemed to listen to his uncle Mycroft too much.

Next born was Alice. She had her mother’s skill in art as well as her father’s skill in mystery. She and Will Claud were born not too long from each other, so it was no surprise that they were constantly wrestling for the spotlight. Alice didn’t try to outwit her brother as much as he did her, but she wasn’t new to winning.

Finally, the twins; Clayton and Catherine. Clayton was mischievous and didn’t hesitate to make it known, but Catherine, sitting in that chair across her mother as her soft skin is replicated by paint onto a canvas of color, was practically an angel.

While the other children would hurdle over each other to get to their father every time he stepped through the front doors, Cathy would wait beside her mother politely before walking to her father slowly. Her siblings would part, forming a walkway in the middle as if she were royalty.

So then the joke was made and the chair painting was currently underway. They had to find the right chair, and they did. It looked so elegant, so royally distinguished. It looked perfect. Fit for a queen.

And that was what the joke was. That Catherine was the “queen”. Not a very funny one without context, Cathy’s siblings later found out, but a good one to tease her with. However, queen Cathy didn’t mind it. In fact, she was quick to drop into character, the smoothest transition known to man-kind. 

While, yes, Catherine’s character was rather humorous, it still held some concerns. Would she become the lordly queen her siblings tried to paint her as? Would she ever realize it was all a joke her siblings made up? Growing up was never something she forced on her children, but she didn’t want to have them growing too used to a title like that. Y/n joked to her husband one night in bed as they held the sleeping majesty, whom had crawled into their bed without reason.

“I’m highly aware she’s ‘the queen’ and all, but I really hope she doesn’t decide she’d like to adopt the complete role. I wouldn’t be able to stand it if my baby became my nightmare. The other four are already so much work.” She chuckled as she brushed some of Catherine’s hair behind her ear.

Sherlock looked at his sleeping daughter. She looked so at peace, just as she always did, and he nodded yet noted his disagreement. “I doubt she’d ever become such a hassle. She’s been so patient and kind, I can’t see her actually devolving a bad side. Clayton, sure, but his sister?” Their eyes flicked up to meet each others. A beat later and they were in hushed snickers.

“Mummy?”

“Yes?”

“When will daddy be returning home?” She had relaxed her facial muscles, if only she’d done so with her limbs- make it easier for her mother, and held a casual tone of voice. Another thing with Catherine; she was harder to read than most.

“I’m not sure, my dear. He should be back before supper...” Y/n lifted her head to peak over the easel and watch her three older kids as they played with Clayton. He was a tough kid, but always overestimated how tough he really was. Y/n felt concern fill her gut when he first begged to play with his older siblings, but she let him anyways, Sherlock being the one to thank for that decision.

“Good. I want to sit next to him tonight. And you. I want to sit next to both of you, mummy.” She gave her mother a small smile, which she returned, before adjusting to her original pose.

Y/n paused after she finished the details involving the chair and Cathy. “Catherine, you do realize that I sit next to your father at dinner, right? And Eddie sits on his other side...that is, if Willy loses their fight tonight...I wonder why they don’t just take turns...” She muttered the last few sentences to herself in heavy contemplation.

“Mhm! You can sit next to him too!” The little girl watched her mother process her question with wide eyes of anticipation. She realized Y/n still didn’t quite understand and was quick to explain. “I can sit on your lap, mummy! Like when I was this big!” Catherine held up her hands to show an overexaggerated space between her small hands that supposedly represented her only one or two years ago.

“Well... Daddy and I can talk about it when he gets home. Is that alright with you?”

“Mhm! But I don’t want to crush the new me, so don’t be afraid to tell me no, mummy, okay?!” Her innocence was adorable, but not more than the grin that sat upon her lips.

Clayton rushed in, causing Y/n to instinctively reach for her easel protectively. He chortled to himself before announcing what was on his mind. “It’s not a new you, Cathy, it’s a new me! I’ll bet you on it, I’m shore I have the funs!”

“Clayton Luther Holmes!” Y/n’s eyes doubled in size. “Who taught you about betting?”

Her son ignored her question and continued, “Besides, what if I want to sit on mother’s lap?!”

“We can’t both sit on mummy- what about the baby?”

“Uhh, it can move, no doy?! It can move just like Will Claud tells me to. It doesn’t need to be shell-fish!” Clayton muttered bitterly. “If Will Claud really wants to call someone his funny names, he should call the baby them.” His time with the older kids was undoubtfully the reasoning behind the failed attempts of words he didn’t fully understand.

“Do you mean ‘selfish?’“

“Yeah, that’s what I said. Don’t you agree, mummy? See, she agrees!” Clayton tried to argue with his twin, but his words had no effect on her. Catherine stared at him blankly, confused like her mother.

“Mummy didn’t say anything, Clayton. She said we can talk about it when daddy gets home, so you can wait here with me.” She scooted over a bit in the chair and pat beside her. Clayton shot her a look of distaste and ran back out into the yard.

“That was...odd.” Y/n blinked. 

“He did remind me though, mummy... The baby can’t move... maybe I could sit with daddy instead?” Catherine sounded reassuring, her feathery voice calming her mother.

Which she really needed. She could hardly focus on her painting now. Her heart was begging for Sherlock to walk through the front doors already, spare her from another interruption that would throw her off-course for the fifth time that evening.

Like magic, her wish was granted and a knock sounded on the study door. Both Catherine and Y/n’s heads snapped toward Sherlock entering the room. “How’s her-majesty doing?” He smirked at Cathy as he set down his case. “I heard from two little competitive detectives that mummy is creating a masterpiece of her masterpiece! Are the rumors true?”

“That they are, detective. Seems you’ve found out the surprise before it could surprise you.” Catherine giggled as her father lifted her from the soft red chair and spun her around before planting a kiss on her forehead.

“So, my little queen, how are you?”

“Good.” She smiled brightly. “How are you? Did mummy ask you yet?”

Sherlock turned to face Y/n, who looked away as fast as she could- wide eyes and all. “Did mummy ask me what, Rin?”

“If I could sit with you or her during supper? I would sit on mummy’s lap, but I don’t want to hurt the baby, and even if I could, Clay wants to sit on her too. I don’t want to make it unfair!” Catherine frowned. “I told him he could wait with me until you were here to talk about it but he didn’t want to.”

“I’ll tell you what. Since mummy has the baby, you can sit with her and I’ll have Clayton sit with me.”

“Yeah! He moves around a lot and we want to be extra careful with mummy and mini-baby, right?” Sherlock nodded, Y/n still trying to figure out what her daughter was saying, and sent Cathy off to play with her siblings until Alice finished supper. It wasn’t intended for Y/n’s pregnancy, but it certainly helped. A system in which the kids could claim nights to help out with meals. Alice loved to make dinners while Edward loved to bake. The smell of a delicious homecooked meal was never lacking in the Holmes house.

“Hear that? Mini-baby gets to sit next to the queen tonight.”

“I’m jealous, quite frankly.” Sherlock’s grin never ceased to bring Y/n’s to her face. Though she was exhausted, her husband made her feel calm and peaceful. “So, our five little reminders never cease to remind you, do they?”

“No...and don’t forget the sixth, Mr. Holmes.”

“Believe me, I haven’t, Mrs. Holmes. I’m simply awaiting their arrival. Perhaps a few more before I needn’t anymore reminders?”

“Mayhaps...however- Let’s talk about it when I’m no longer expecting, please. I’m already resisting the urge to collapse.” Sherlock chuckled to himself, shaking his head as he watched his wife struggle to the doors before helping her. His arms scoop her up and carry her to their room. They passed the paintings that hung upon the walls, portraits of Sherlock, portraits of their children, a portrait by her mother in law of their wedding day. The wall was home to their present and past, providing room for their future as well.

They were in their room for only a few minutes before a loud chatter followed them. Both adults closed their eyes and prepared themselves for their little ones who would burst through their doors at any moment. His promise was good, and they had five, almost six, reminders to show for proof.

[dameronology]

that’s all {din djarin x reader}

(i’m reposting this bc it wasn’t showing up in the tags and it was stressing me out) 

summary: you’d saved din djarin from himself before. now, with the pain of losing his kid, you’re about to do it all over again. (kinda based on find me here by hayley williams)

warnings: this is...flangst. fluff and angst. swearing. mentions of depression but it’s also a bit ✨positive✨

this is just me trying to be the emotional janitor to...that. i’ve tried to keep it as gender neutral as possible but some of the conversation might imply an afab reader but hopefully it’s vague to be completely objective!!

- jazz

anyways i know i already said it but !! spoilers !! spoilers !! spoilers !!

p.s spot the titanic reference 

Grogu was tiny but the whole he left in your lives was massive.

You always knew you were going to have to give him up - hell, that had been the job in the first place - but you hadn’t expected it to hurt so much. He wasn’t your kid but at the same he completely and entirely was. You’d never expected your first parenting experience to be with a tiny green Jedi but at the same time, you wouldn’t have had it any other way. The next few months were going to be hard; accepting that he wasn’t yours to keep and that he was in a better place was guaranteed to be a long process. It would be worth it in the end but the initial pain was bordering on unbearable.

Din was better at hiding it than you. Admittedly, he did have a thick beskar layer to shield his emotions and pain from the outside world but he couldn’t hide it from you; never from you. Even behind the metal, you could read him like a book. It was a product of spending every waking minute together (his overprotective doing, not yours) and in return, he had learnt every habit and every quirk of yours. He sometimes cursed your ability to read him, especially when it lead to you saying things like you did not just tilt your helmet at me like that, Din Djarin.

He’d been quieter in the days since Luke Skywalker had taken the kid - quieter than usual, at least. Din was already a pretty taciturn person; compared to how he was with other people, he practically spoke your ear off but since you’d landed back on Nevarro, he’d completely kept to himself. It was painful to watch, seeing him rise at the crack of dawn to take a bounty, only to return in the evening with a few more bruises than he’d had that morning. You wanted to say something to do something that would make him snap back to reality, but this was probably his grieving process and you had to respect that. Or, you had to at least try to.

That was, until, it felt like Din was killing both you and him; working himself to the point of exhaustion, barely sleeping and refusing to even acknowledge Greef or Cara. You could deal with him being angsty. You could deal with him grieving. You couldn’t, however, deal with him ignoring you. You had literally vowed to go through all your bad times together and Din Djarin was nothing if not a man of his word. He knew it. You knew it too - and you’d be damned if you’d let him forget it.

It was on a cold - at least by Nevarro standards - morning that you decided it was time to show him some tough love. The Mandalorian had decided to hole out on one of Karga’s old ships that morning, claiming that he wanted to fix it. You were no engineering genius, but given that the old jet’s wings had fallen off, you could see it was past the point of no return and that Din had just been looking for an excuse. He was good at that these days.

‘Din!’ You called. The bay doors were open, but the ship itself was dark and dusty. Tinkering, my ass. As expected, there was no reply. ‘Din! Don’t ignore me.’

Silence.

‘Please?’

You grumbled to yourself, walking further inside the dimly lit ship. Tiny specs of dust were floating in the streams of thin light, leading your path further and further towards the cockpit. Who ever it had belonged it, it pre-dated the Republic, let alone the Empire or new order. You tried to resist the urge to cough, instead choosing to focus on your mission: hunting down the Mandalorian. The tables really had turned, considering he was very rarely the prey.

‘I was talking to Karga.’ You continued - as far as you knew, you were talking to thin air, but you liked your chances. ‘He offered me a bounty puck for...Corellia, is it? For that big, bad guy we didn’t catch last year. You know the one that nearly killed me?’

There was a crash from the cockpit, and you grinned to yourself. It was a little unethical to scare the man out of hiding with your bullshit, but you were getting desperate.

‘I figured it would be good to get out a bit, try and distract myself, you know?’ You continued. ‘So I was gonna borrow a ship and head out there tomorrow-’

‘- like hell you’re doing that on your own.’  

A six foot mountain of beskar suddenly stepped out from the darkness. Normally, that would have been enough to scare anyone, but not you. You’d married that six foot mountain of beskar. That probably gave you more guts than anyone in the damn galaxy -- until they found out he wasn’t actually that terrifying. Not many people would have taken the Mandalorian seriously if they knew he enjoyed having his hair played with.

You held your hands up in the air, stretching out your fingers to show that there was no puck in sight.

‘You lied.’ Din grunted.

‘And you were ignoring me.’ You shot back. ‘’S going on?’

‘I told you. I was working on the ship-’

‘- nope.’ You cut him off. ‘Try again.’

‘Karga asked me to fix it-’

‘- Still no!’ You snapped. ‘We gonna go three for three or are you gonna finally pull your head out your ass and stop lying to me, Din?’

There wasn’t a single person in the galaxy who dared speak back to the Mandalorian - except you. That was what had made him fall for you in the first place. It was like you couldn’t even see the beskar. You’d always seen him as Din, and never as the Mandalorian, or a warrior. You’d made it clear from the day you met that you wouldn’t take any bullshit from anyone, him included, and he’d always respected that.

‘You have been holing yourself away for weeks.’ You continued. ‘I know it’s hard but you have to accept it. Grogu wasn’t ours to keep - he never was.’

Din didn’t response, instead dropping his gaze down to the floor.’

‘Hey.’ You put a finger at the base of the helmet, tilting his head back up to look at you. ‘Look at me. Talk to me.’

‘I miss him.’ He stated; short and blunt. Fitting, really. ‘And it hurts.’

‘I get that.’ You gently placed your hands on either side of his helmet, fingers splaying out over the cold metal. ‘But it’s better to hurt together. Can I?’

Din nodded, signalling that it was okay for you to take it off. You gently tugged at the helmet, momentarily breaking away from him to place it beside you. It was a relief to see his face after so many weeks of having the beskar between you; the soft brown eyes and slightly crooked smile that met you on the other side felt like home. You could have stared at him forever if the galaxy wasn’t so fucking demanding of your presence.

You’d spent far too long on the other side of the beskar, waiting for him to let you in. And now that you’d got him, now that you’d promised yourselves to one another forever? You weren’t going to let it happen again.

You gently pushed back a few tufts of brown hair, offering him a sad smile. ‘You know we made the right decision, yeah?’

He nodded, leaning into your touch as your hands carded through his hair. ‘I know.’

‘So you gotta stop beating yourself up, baby.’ You stressed. ‘Stop shutting people out - stop shutting me out. I know we don’t have the kid anymore but we are still a family.’

‘I lost the ship. I lost the kid.’ Din quietly spoke. ‘I’m just worried that-’

‘- I’m not going anywhere.’ You shook your head, knowing what he was going to say before the words even left his mouth. ‘Even if you paid me. You are stuck with me, okay? Cursed with me till the day I keel over and die.’

Finally, Din smiled. He looked you dead in the eye and he smiled, eyes creasing at the side as he peered down at you, eventually tightening his arms around your waist. He held your head to his chest, ungloved hand gently clutching you as he rested his chin on your hair. The first time he’d clung onto you like this had been after a rough mission; neither of you had been sure if he was going to make it back and when he did, the first thing he did was pull you into his arms and you stayed there for what felt like hours. That was when Din realised for the first time that he loved you - and now, after weeks of isolating himself and shutting you out, this didn’t feel completely different from that. It was just that this time, it was less of a realisation of more of a reminder.

‘I didn’t expect it to be this bad.’ Din quietly admitted.

‘I know.’ You whispered back, voice slightly muffled by his chest. ‘But pain is only temporary. Dark times pass and we’ll learn to look back on this and enjoy the memories. They won’t always be tainted.’

He’d been in a dark place when he’d met you. It was like he’d been treading water, waiting for the riptides to take him, to stake their claim and remind him of his mortality, to remind him that not even the bravest people can forfeit their ability to hurt. He tried. Maker, he had tried. The icy and emotionless impression he gave to strangers wasn’t an accident. It was a survival mechanism; a defense mechanism. One that you’d chosen to ignore. You’d saved him in every way a person could be saved.

Just as the waves were pulling him under, you’d dragged him out; dragged him to the shore and reminded him that pain was merely part of being human. Most importantly, you’d called his attention to the fact that no matter how much beskar he wore or how impenetrable he acted, that he couldn’t avoid being one. He could run away from bounty hunters and Imperials and the thousands of enemies he’d made but the fact of mortality was always hot on his tail.

Now, you were pulling him up for air all over again.

Eventually, pain stopped being a reminder of his humanity and instead, it was replaced by his love for you. His ability to feel things for you. You’d saved him then and now, you were helping him come up for air all over again. Being human didn’t always mean to hurt - it could just as much mean to love.

‘I’ve got you, okay?’ You tightened your grip on him, eyes meeting his. ‘Whatever you need.’

‘You.’ Din replied. ‘I need you. That’s all.’

a/n: ok i realised i published an identical but slightly different imagine to this in october but...clearly i have a type and that type is imagines where the mandalorian confesses that you’re the only thing he needs because i eat that shit up. consume it whole. i am telling you. i have no regrets. my content might is predictable but HELL at least u can rely on something in these wild times❤️