#i love making collages sue me

[light-yaers]

╰┈➤ take care, ch. 9

[akai-anna]

My gosh, I've been down a nostalgia rabbit hole and been going back to knb and nijiaka and noticed that you were still active. You've given me and other nijiakas precious memories, bless you and hope you have a lovely day!

For once, my timing was just right: coming home to see this precious ask and have the time to answer it. Today is blessed.

NijiAka is still in my heart, so utterly precious, NijiAka has become part of my soul, altered my life in many ways, and to this day I still reread my favourite fics (some of which I would love to rec or talk about TONS) and stare at my favourite pieces of art and follow my favourite Japanese artists and doujinka, still hunt for merch so I can add it to my collection, and think of them regularly.

I would still be actively talking about them if there were people who were interested in chatting about them. Just saying. You can totally take that as an invitation. Just saying.

Thank you for dropping by my askbox, you made me so happy with your words! I truly hope you have a lovely day, and may NijiAka live long in our hearts, even if the manga/anime ended ages ago!

[reidsaurora]

"Hot Chocolate, White Lies" ~ A. Hotchner

Summary: Aaron might be a pain in the ass to shop for, but at least he's cute.

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x GN!Reader (Reader does wear makeup)

Word Count: 1,444

Content Warning: mild swearing, mentions of food, i think that's it!

Extra Notes: i took creative liberties with the things featured in this fic, sue me (also sorry for the sh!tty summary, it will happen again) // icon in collage is by @catsadams

Beta Read By: @theghouligan 🫶🏻

Originally Written: 10/12/2023 through 10/19/2023

Criminal Minds masterlist can be found here!

Halloweek masterlist can be found here!

There were many things you were unsure of, but one thing you did know was that autumn was your absolute favorite time of the whole year.

The mornings when you were both home from cases usually started slow and sweet. You'd wake up ten minutes past your alarm, Aaron's chapped lips the only thing strong enough to awaken you from your slumber. You'd press to know why he allowed you to be late, but he'd just insist, "We have nowhere important to be. Besides, you just looked so peaceful. How could I ever wake you?"

When you finally rolled out of bed, his hands would be on your waist, his lips trailing soft kisses down your neck as the two of you made your way into the kitchen. You'd start on a pan of French toast while Aaron put on the coffee, stealing quick kisses as the two of you glided around the space, each of you already anticipating the other's every move.

Then, you'd eat together in the breakfast nook, the sunlight glowing all around him, somehow making his five-o'clock shadow and bedhead seem ethereal. The conversation would flow from topic to topic as easily as water flowed downstream. But this particular day, there was one topic Aaron seemed to be actively avoiding.

It was a week from his birthday, and while he knew better than to tell you not to get him anything, he would still put his foot down about making a big deal out of the situation. If one person found out, then they'd all find out, and truly, his only wish every year was to spend his birthday with the person he loved most, not the entirety of the FBI. He'd much rather have take-out and a cheap bottle of wine in the comfort of his own home than hors d'oeuvres and expensive champagne with people he hardly knew.

Still, you'd tried all morning to get him to crack and tell you what he wanted for his birthday. But his response was always the same: "You're the only thing I need, my love."

One somewhat pointless conversation and a plate of French toast later, the two of you were headed back to the bedroom to get ready for the day ahead. He'd head into the bathroom to shave, and you'd steal glances of him as you got dressed in the bedroom. Then he'd do the same, eyeing you with absolute love and adoration as you applied layers of makeup he still insisted you didn't need, even after years of marriage.

Soon enough, you'd arrive at your favorite little bookstore and cafe. Any onlooker would immediately be able to tell just how in love Aaron was with you, sporting a matching sweater you'd clearly picked out and his hand only parting from yours to open the door, which he insisted on doing any time you went anywhere together.

"Alright, I'm setting you free," he joked, placing a soft kiss on your forehead. "Don't cause too much chaos in the romance aisle, okay?"

You giggled, leaning up to kiss him on the lips for once. "I'll only squeal if they have anything signed by my favorite author."

And with that, he was headed off to the cafe side of the building, going to collect a cup of your favorite hot chocolate. Most people preferred to drink coffee while they shopped, but to you, nothing beat curling the sleeves of your sweater around your hands and sipping a cup of hot chocolate. Even after years of coming to this place, you still hadn't figured out how they made it taste infinitely better than other hot chocolate you'd ever had.

Once you were absolutely sure Aaron was in line at the cafe, you were bee-lining in the opposite direction of the romance aisle and over to the literary fiction section.

While you'd originally told Aaron you wanted to go to the bookstore under the guise of wanting to see if they had a copy of a new release you'd been excited about, you secretly had other plans. If he wasn't going to tell you what he wanted, you'd take matters into your own hands.

You peered around one of the shelves to make sure he wasn't looking, letting out a quick sigh of relief as you spotted him reading something on his phone.

You had all of about three minutes to find a couple books that he hadn't read, which was no small feat. Nearly every second of Aaron's free time was spent devouring a novel, and while you loved that he had found a hobby he truly enjoyed, it also made it devastatingly hard to buy him new books.

In roughly two and a half minutes, you'd managed to find three books that you were sure Aaron would love. Then, you were all but sprinting over to the romance section and grabbing the first book you saw, reading the back cover nonchalantly as your husband walked up.

You were reading the back of some novel about two rival scientists falling in love when Aaron got back with two cups of hot chocolate and a sugar cookie the size of your face. "Your drink, my dear," he said, holding out one of the cups.

You took the cup from him, inhaling that first anticipated sip of the warm liquid. "Thank you."

"You found anything interesting yet?" he asked, a hand meeting the small of your back.

You shook your head, placing the scientist romance novel back on the shelf and picking up another book with a beautiful pink cover. "Nothing much. No signed copies so you'll be glad to know I won't be disturbing the other readers with my squeals."

He chuckled, a deep sound that made butterflies go off in your stomach every time you heard it. "Thank you, I'm sure it's appreciated," he kidded. He took the tote from your shoulder, immediately registering the weight of the bag. "Nothing much?" he inquired.

Before he could open the bag to look inside, you were swatting his hand and snatching it away. "It's… an encyclopedia I promised Reid I'd get for him if I saw it."

Aaron cocked an eyebrow at you. "Since when do you go shopping for Reid?" he inquired, a chuckle on the tip of his tongue.

You wracked your brain for some kind of response that sounded at least halfway truthful. "He hasn't been able to find it anywhere and he knew we liked coming here, so he asked me to check next time we came."

That skeptical brow of his only raised itself higher. "Well, there's one flaw with your story and that's that I'm a profiler and I know when you're lying to me."

Before you could form a rebuttal, he was taking the bag out of your hands again. "Aaron, don't-" you barely got out the words before he was holding up the copy of The Midnight Library.

His brows furrowed as he held up the book, examining the cover for a moment. "This isn't a romance."

You let out an exasperated breath at his examination. "That's kind of the point, Aaron."

"Well, I thought we came to find a copy of that new book you've been looking for."

You ran a hand through your hair, letting out a small huff of amusement. "I suppose I should come clean. I did lie to you."

Aaron's mouth flew open in fake shock. "No! I never would've guessed."

"Not about that," you grumbled, slapping his arm. "About why we're here in the first place. I wanted to find you something for your birthday."

His features wrinkled in embarrassment, a small sigh escaping between his lips. "Well, now I look like an ass."

You were inclined to agree, he did kind of look like an ass. But he was a cute ass and you wouldn't want him any other way. Hands flying up to his cheeks, you pulled him down for a long and soft kiss. His wrinkles of slight mortification melted away as he settled into your touch, the scents of hot chocolate and new books taking over each of your senses.

Aaron was the first to pull away, moving his kiss from your lips to your forehead, before meeting you with an expression filled with admiration. "You-"

"-'Didn't have to get me anything.' I know," you finished for him. "But these ones seem really interesting and I thought that maybe we could read them together."

His mouth curved upward into that smile of his that was so sweet, so loving, so… Aaron. "If I'm going to share a book, I'm always going to hope it's with you."

-> taglist: @1234-angelika @lowsodiumfreaks67 @drayshadow @alexxavicry @cordyandbilliehavemyheart @the-lucky-ones311 @mercuryvapours @darkloverfox @sammyrenae68 @cherrycandle @asgardprincess97 @gh0stgurl @esposadomd @randomwriter1021 @eddieharrington @paintlavillered @lavhoes @rhyanishere @namorswhore @danielle143 @handsupforamiracle @topguncultleader @ah-blossom @reidselle @dungeons-are-too-cold @bbbbbbbbbbbbbbl @louderfortheback @reidsbookclub @annahargrove @cwritesforfun @maelartasch @lover-of-books-and-tea @juismissing @captainchris-pike

[luvangelbreak]

Destress

matthew sturniolo x layla venita (female!oc) summary: layla had a long day at work and needs something to calm her down. matt’s tattoos seem like the perfect colouring book. warnings: swearing, stress?, kissing?, idk just fluff pretty much word count: 1.4k a/n: got this idea after seeing his story (the first photo on the collage below) so hope y'all like this bc i love a good fluff fic !!

not proofread!!

Layla was sick of her work, working in hospitality drained her every day and she rarely came home happy. Today was a day when she had felt the life had been drained directly from her body, her limbs hurt and her mind was a mess as she stepped through the front door of her shared apartment with her boyfriend, Matt.

"Hi my love," he smiled at her from the kitchen. He tried to greet her with a positive attitude every day in hopes of making her feel better and he immediately noticed she seemed more tired than usual, "You okay?"

"No," she grumbled, throwing her bag onto the counter before sliding her hands down her face in frustration, "I can't fucking deal with people anymore."

"What happened?" he asked softly, rounding the counter to stand beside her, not daring to touch her in case she didn't want to be held. There were often days that she didn't wanna interact with Matt after work out of pure stress but today was a day she needed to be beside him, his calm presence always bringing her a sense of peace.

"Someone basically threatened to sue me because the chef fucked up and gave them regular bread instead of gluten-free and it was just a fucking mess. It wasn't even my fault I wrote it on the fucking docket," she rambled, running a hand through her hair out of stress before she looked up to his soft face, "Sorry."

"No need to apologise, baby. Anything I can do to help?" he asked and she nodded, opening her arms for a hug. He didn't hesitate to step forward, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her into his chest. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders tightly, resting her head under his chin as he placed his head on hers.

A moment of silence fell between them as she listened to his breathing, instantly calming her down. She shifted her head to look up at him and he stared down at her before she leaned up, placing a kiss on his lips.

"I'm gonna go shower. You wanna watch a movie when I get out?" she asked and he nodded, letting his arms unravel from around her and he placed once last kiss on her lips before letting her walk out of the room.

As he waited for Layla to finish showering, he got them a bag of popcorn and some other snacks. He decided to get out her small collection of colouring books and markers, placing them on the coffee table in front of the couch as he patiently waited for her to return.

Soon enough, she appeared from the bedroom in black shorts and one of his Ransom shirts making him smile. As she made her way to the couch, she noticed the snacks and colouring books on the coffee table making her smile.

"You're so sweet," she gave him a downturned smile as she plopped herself down on the couch beside him, pecking his lips as he wrapped his left arm around her shoulders. She looked along his tattooed arm, trailing her fingers across the permanent art. An idea popped into her head and she leaned forward, grabbing a red marker from the table as Matt scrolled through the movies on Netflix, "Can I colour in your tattoos?"

"What?" he asked, an amused smile on his lips and she smiled up at him, grabbing his wrist to move his arm from around her shoulders so it lay across her lap.

"I wanna colour your tattoos," she smiled and he chuckled before nodding.

"Okay, baby," he agreed and she smiled widely before popping open the red marker, gliding it across his skin where the leaves were scattered across his arms. She then grabbed the orange marker as Matt put a random movie on the TV that she didn't pay any mind to as she continued focusing on drawing inside his tattoos. She coloured in more of the leaves until they were all filled in before moving to his Marvin the Martian tattoo.

"What colour is Marvin's helmet?" she mumbled as she grabbed the red marker, colouring in his body and legs.

"Dark green," Matt responded, looking down at her focused face as he smiled lovingly. He had never thought to colour in his tattoos but he was glad that Layla was the one doing it.

She made a quick nod before picking up the dark green marker, colouring in his helmet and the ring around his waist. She picked up the yellow marker, colouring in the brush thing on the top of Marvin's helmet before she nodded, happy with her work.

While she had the yellow marker, she quickly coloured in the bumble bee before switching to a pink marker, scribbling in the small seashell that he got for his mom.

"What colour should I make the owl?" she asked, looking up to see he was already looking at her with a grin on his face, "What?"

"Nothing. You're just cute," he leaned forward, placing a kiss on her forehead and she closed her eyes in content, "You should do brown."

"Mkay," she nodded, picking up the brown marker. The owl was a more intricate tattoo so she was more focused, her tongue peeking out of her mouth in concentration. She then twisted his arm towards her, colouring in the 3 headed dog brown as well.

Once she finished the dog, she decided to colour in the numbers and letters of the Massachusetts number plate tattoo with dark red and the writing on the top and bottom in blue. She then moved to colour in the keys with yellow before colouring in the bear with red, going over it with brown to make it darker.

"What do you think?" she asked, clicking the lid back on the marker as she twinkled her hands over his arms and he looked down at his now colourful arm, smiling at her with a love-filled gaze.

"I love it," he leaned forward, placing a kiss on her lips and she instantly kissed him back, her body melting into his.

"Wait!" she pulled away quickly and looked down at his arm, "We gotta make sure it's dry so it doesn't smudge."

He chuckled at her and she shifted to lay her head down on his thighs, looking up at him with a dream-like twinkle in her eyes.

"What?" he smiled down at her, using his right arm to tangle his hand into her hair, massaging her scalp lightly.

"Can I draw on your arm?" she cheesed up at him and he let out a snicker before nodding.

"Yeah just don't use a permanent marker," he nodded and she quickly grabbed a pen from the coffee table, pulling his arm towards her so his forearm laid on her boobs comfortably.

She started scribbling stars and flowers all across the empty spaces on his forearm as well as the top of his hand, the light brush of the pen tickling his skin gently. Being so engrossed in drawing, she hadn't even noticed that the movie was almost done and Matt's arm was basically entirely covered with her doodles.

"I think I went a little overboard," she mumbled, pulling away her pen from his skin and he took his eyes away from the TV to see his arm entirely covered in flowers, stars and little stick people making him chuckle.

"Should just let you give me a sleeve," he chuckled and she smiled up at him.

"Tell Mez to give me a tattoo gun and I'll get it done," she joked, sliding his arm down from her chest so it rested on her stomach.

"I'll let you give me a tattoo if you really want to," he shrugged and her face lit up in joy as she sat up, spinning around as she crossed her legs beside his.

"Will you actually?" she double-checked and he nodded, a soft smile on his lips, "Message Mez then!"

"Okay my love," he laughed at her excitement, pulling his phone out of the pocket of his black sweatpants and sending Mez a text to say he wanted Layla to give him a tattoo.

"What tattoo should I draw?" she asked, picking up a sketch pad that was entwined with the colouring books and she flipped to a blank page.

"Do a flower garden," he shrugged and she nodded, quickly scribbling a flower garden that would fit in the blank space at the top of his shoulder. Once she completed her sketch, the movie had finished and she spun the book around to show him, "Perfect."

"I won't do the whole thing, Mez can do the majority as long as I get to do some of the flowers," she cheered and he nodded, leaning forward to press a kiss to her forehead making her smile up at him.

"Done deal," he smiled down at her and she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, kissing his lips gently and all of the stress from her day melted away as if she hadn't even endured it in the first place.

[randomvarious]

Today's compilation:

Ccommd IV 2002 IDM / Abstract

Continuing this foray into the now-ancient, pre-social media days of online music community building with this highly ephemeral, half-decent IDM comp from 2002 that was made by the message board denizens of the website of Warp Records. Warp itself had long carried the torch of being the world's premier IDM label, and the folks who contributed to this album seem to have been highly inspired by a bunch of their own acts, like Aphex Twin, Squarepusher, Autechre, Boards of Canada, and a whole bunch of others.

And knowing that these musicians loved Warp to the point that they'd be regular contributors to its own message board kinda makes me feel that, while listening to this, I am myself someone at the label who's constantly seeking out fresh talent and wades through neverending, enormous piles of demos that they've received. And I've just happened to pop this Ccommd IV CD into my changer to see if anything might catch my ear 🤞.

Except, in reality, I didn't actually find this one on CD, because apparently, virtually no one can. It's not currently for sale on Discogs, it's never been sold there, and only 4 users on the site claim to own a copy right now. Super rare!

But thankfully, although it's been long out of print, the UK-based collective that was responsible for putting it out originally, TEFOSAV (The Electronic Foundation of Sound and Vision) records, has made it available on their own Bandcamp site for free, which is where I was able to come across it 👍.

So what we have here in the fourth installment of this Warp-inspired series, as is probably somewhat average for someone who gets tasked with listening to demos, is a comp with a good deal of half-baked clunk on it and a few nice gems too. The album hits back-to-back with Sktbx's "Wikal - Butcheredcetacea Mix" and Orange Dust's "Bitmap Sunset," both of which should have you feeling like you've come across a pretty sweet, nearly-lost-to-the-y2k-Internet-sands-of-time IDM goldmine. But most of what then follows that beginning turns out to be pretty underwhelming 😔.

That is until the grand finale, with Autofire's "Boots Akid (Nautilus Remix)," which is one of those songs that specializes in the art of splicing together multiple split-second samples of various bits of sound in order to construct melodies and rhythms out of them. I especially love when people do this type of stuff because I feel like it's such a meticulous process to make these collages in the first place, and it also happens to throw up a big middle finger and shit-eating-grin to the absurd copyright police, who can't sue you if the provenance of the minuscule bit that you've sampled is actually unknowable 😁. That said, though, I'm pretty sure I can hear the distinct voice of a very prominent TV character in this one. Not gonna give it away for fear that some big, evil, corporate web scraper comes across this post and files a cease-and-desist and/or lawsuit because of me—these posts show up in Google searches, folks!—but I'm pretty sure I'm hearing that voice. And Nautilis, by the way (yes, I know, I spelled it as Nautilus before, because that's how it was written on the tracklist!), had already made his first release on Mike Paradinas' (µ-Ziq) Planet Mu label the year before this album itself was released.

So, I had a feeling that I knew what I was getting myself into with this from jump, because most comps of this type aren't likely to consistently knock it out of the park, but given that fact, this album was still able to satisfy enough. So far, this little online y2k-era archaeology project of mine's been fun, even if a good portion of the music's ended up leaving a bit to be desired.

And for more posts like this one, check out Finnish label Luumu's Into the Core of Luumu and this double-disc that was made by folks from the ambient mailing list of pioneering online electronic music resource, Hyperreal, too ✌️.

Highlights:

Sktbx - "Wikal - Butcheredcetacea Mix" Orange Dust - "Bitmap Sunset" Pro(xy) - "D.C.K." Autofire - "Boots Akid (Nautilus Remix)"

[maniacalgenius]

heyyyyy!!!

so it's been a while. since saturday before last i think -_- anyways quick recap!!

last saturday was the day after my exam and none of the new material was published so i just chilled and hung out w my best friend watching my favorite show and we also moved some stuff from my old apt back to my house. also she explained to me her system for eating skittles 😂

last sunday, i went to church in the morning and then spent the afternoon running errands with another friend who is going to be one of my roommates this fall. we moved some of her stuff to my mom’s house to store and she bought me a snowball because i hunted down a package for her when she was out of town the other day 😋 she is my (unofficial) adopted big sister and i love her <3 then i picked up groceries and made dinner - found a new recipe that i like! (those are few and far between bc i have so many food issues lol)

my memory is currently blanking on what i did last monday-wednesday except go to class and spend time w big sister/future roomie. i tried to get a lot of studying done bc one of my "littles" in a student org came to town to do something on campus friday and she stayed at my house thursday-sunday. we watched a lot of Harry Potter (one through almost the end of four!) and went dancing which was… not the best time i’ve ever had dancing but it was still fun 😂 and then she left after church yesterday. then i did some more note taking and hung out with big sister again, studying and doing errands and taking her stuff to my house.

today i slept in, went to class, went to office hours and got problem set 3 done, (problem sets 3 and 4 are on exam 2) and then had Bible study w my mentor who i know through the same student org. then future roomie and i moved the rest of her stuff to my house (she leaves tomorrow) and got ice cream and i'm now making quizlets at her apt while listening to harry potter and the order of the phoenix.

basically for this exam here are the things i’ve got done:

✅ made quizlet 6

✅ written out objectives for part 7 and part 8

✅ problem set 3

✅ made quizlet 7

✅ started a knitting project for my friend (baby blanket for her friend)

so… not great 😂 but it will be fine bc i’ve found lots of new songs to vibe to as i make quizlets!!

however! my best friend’s birthday is approaching and one of my presents for her is that i am painting a little collage of inside jokes we have and stuff that represents our friendship. i’m almost done w the first item, which is the character “oh” voiced by jim parsons from the movie home, because the character has a line where he says “what is the meaning of your face?” and my friend and i quote that to each other all the time. so here is my little oh!!! very happy with how he came out. (yes i’m aware he looks terrifying without pupils, i’m going to add them i swear, it’s just that i had to do so many layers of white for it to actually show up and haven’t gone back to add the pupils yet hehe 😋) i'm going to take a fine tip black marker and write "what is the meaning of your face?" either next to him or across him.

pls don't sue me for copyright infringement, dreamworks <3

also i am verrrrry excited to be getting rid of two rather large balls of yarn making the baby blanket for my friend. they have been sitting in my knitting basket for literally two years (since we moved to this house) and i don't even remember why i had them in the first place. yay for purging myself of useless things without being wasteful!!

☙ song on loop: “haven’t had enough” by marianas trench 🫶🏻 (this was on repeat yesterday at home after church while i was writing out my objectives 7 and 8)

☙ current book: still rereading sorcerer’s stone on my phone when i’m eepy. but almost done!

i have allergy testing tomorrow morning before class :[ not looking forward to it. but i haven't been tested since i was little and i'm hoping to get my allergies under control to improve my quality of life. and i think this appointment has been in the works since... november??? so a long time coming. i'll be glad to get it over with!

hopefully the next update will be quicker than this one… and with lots more stuff done 🫶🏻

xx

[grasslandgirl]

HI SAV!!! HAPPY SLASHERVERSARY MWAH. legitimately so deeply excited to read the new fic 💖 ALSO wanted to throw ask at you bc I am sure you have many thoughts and I wanna hear them all, so! do you have a favorite line you've written, across all of slasherverse so far, or one that you think is like, a core line/core component? and what scene in 'verse so far has been the most fun to write?

HIII JADE MWAAHHH MWAAH MWAH THANK U SORRY FOR BELATED RESPONSE XOXO

ooooohh aaaaaaa okay. in answering these it got really long bc I added some snip cuts from some of the fics so. click thru the read more xoxo

do you have a favorite line you've written, across all of slasherverse so far, or one that you think is like, a core line/core component?

ummmm. this is so hard. I think the ending line/lines of the original slasherverse fic are sooo crazy and like impactful to me personally at least ??

But in the moment before the officer reaches them, light breaks through the dense tree line, the first clear beam of sunshine that morning. It lands squarely on Fig’s face. Blinding, but warm. She grimaces, half smile.  “Fucking day break,” she mutters under her breath. 

like. yeah. I feel really good about that being the final ending beat and I think the first/original slasherfic is soooo concise and effective and is forever one of my favorite things i've ever written- I also think the line

He told them that so many times- there’s no one around for miles, kids, did you know that?   There's no one to hear you scream.

that Jamie @gilears used in his first collage (and the cover of the bound fic she made of slasher for me !!!!!) (and my phone lock screen for nearly the last two years) is just. mwaaahhh and maybe that's bc its in the collage. and yet <3

what scene in 'verse so far has been the most fun to write?

i really really loved the imagery in the gorgug pov fic, windows down, scream along at the end when he and fig are driving in the middle of the night scream-singing along to teenagers by mcr. I just love that moment so much.

i also really really enjoyed two different bits in the most recent slasherverse installment, the two year anniversary fic, one where fig and gorgug have a conversation in the middle of the night and the scene is almost entirely dialogue- I really wanted to push myself and try to pare down the descriptions and internal monologue as much as possible bc I think sometimes my writing and dialogue specifically can get bogged down too much, and I really really like how clean and quick the scene came out (also the you and me bit at the end of this snip was a reference to something Jamie and I say to each other all the time bc I'm a SAP <3)

“Nightmare. Uh. It was- it wasn’t- yeah. I was awake until like four last night I think though. Staring at the ceiling.” “Hello preacher, it’s me, the choir.”  Gorgug huffed out a quiet laugh. It filled the room.  “Hello, choir. Can I join you in the… church?”  “Yikes, I dunno, maybe too soon with the church-and-religion jokes, dude. I had to go to four funerals. In churches.” Another pause stretched thin.  “Only two of them were even in churches, Fig-” “Yeah, okay, I know-” “Also it was a year and a half ago-” “Yeah, fine! Okay, sue me for trying to make a terrible-” “And if you’d tried to say that to anyone else-” “-Unfunny joke about our dead friends, dude-” “-They’d probably have you, like, committed, or whatever-” “-I’m sleep deprived as shit, you know I get punchy and stupid when I’m exhausted-” “-and-” “Wait.” “Huh?” “You’re gonna have me committed?” Gorgug sighed. Quiet and affectionate. “Only if I can come with.” “Deal.”  “You and me?”

and then similarly, there's a bit at the end that's basically just a monologue from fig about her feelings for and relationship to gorgug and a single brief response where the context is finally given that she's talking to a therapist. and I just. really enjoyed getting to fall down the rabbit hole of how people. and fig (hello projection) would talk? about that? and I really enjoy how it came out.

“It feels selfish. To- to- we’re trying to be better, right? Like, that’s what we’re doing here, uh, you and me. But I also mean me and him. We’re- fucking- we’re trying to get better. To not be, like, codependent and insanely traumatized and agoraphobic or whatever the fuck and- and- god. I don’t know. I don’t want to lose him. And I feel like- I feel like we’re both trying so hard and going through so much insane shit that no one else can even fucking understand, and- and- if I mess it up, if I want something more then I’m threatening all of that. The- the understanding and the safety and the comfort and like, like, he’s told me that sometimes it’s like I’m the only string keeping him together or the only, like, balloon keeping him afloat- god. Not in those words, actually- whatever, I’m editorializing, but the point, the point is that like. He’s my, like, touchstone to reality. And I’m his. And I get that that’s probably not the most healthy or well adjusted, or anything, but that’s what I’m in therapy to fix? And it’s taking a really fucking long time to fix my fucked up trauma PTSD brain which I get is like, normal and expected or whatever, but until we’re both like, normal and not traumatized codependent ducklings who’ve imprinted on each other for safety in a world that tried to kill us I’m- I’m like- it should stay the same. Us. Me and Gorgug. ‘Cause if I change something and it makes him worse or us worse or undoes any of the progress we’ve fucking made to recover then like- like- it’s just selfish, you know? I don’t wanna be selfish about that. About him.” Her therapist’s blurry image on her computer blinked, head tilted, considering.  “Okay. I hear you.”

finally there's a bit I wrote ages ago and haven't had a place where it fits in a fic yet but really enjoy it so here a gift for anyone who actually read thru this whole post lmao:

“I don’t really know how to pray,” Fig said, kicking slightly at the water. Droplets flicked up and landed with tiny ripples on the surface of the lake. “But I feel like we should. Because they are, back there, all the people that loved them but didn’t know them- not like we did. Who don’t know what it was like. Like, we should do something to like, counteract their prayer or something. Correct it.” “Spell check?” “Yeah,” Fig said, smiling faintly. “But I don’t really know how to do it ‘cept the whole, like, are you there, god, it’s me Fig; thing.” “Dear God.” “Yeah, exactly, Dear God. Do you think that does anything? Do you think he’s listening? If he cares if we say it like a letter or know all the right words? Amen, love Fig, that whole thing.” “Dunno. Do you think it matters? Maybe it’s just for us. To say what needs saying and remember them the way we knew them. And if God’s there and he listens then. I don’t know. It’s a bonus.” “Yeah. Yeah, I think you’re right.”

XOXOXOXOXOOXXOOXOX JADE LOVE U HOPE U ENJOYED NEW SLASHERVERSE THANK UUU FOR THE ASK XOXOX MWAAH

[medusasbush]

read in january 2023

articles (ones behind a paywall are linked through webpage archive):

The irresistible voyeurism of “day in my life” videos

Toward a unified theory of “millennial cringe”

The NFL Isn’t Built for This

The DIY D-Day

Remote Work Is Poised to Devastate America’s Cities

Is modern life ruining our powers of concentration?

How to Ask Good Questions

The Woman Who Had Fun

Three Proposed New Species for the Avatar Sequels: Some Light Suggestions for James Cameron

Gentrification is Inevitable (and Other Lies)

Hacker Lexicon: What Is a Pig Butchering Scam?

Why all ​“eat the rich” satire looks the same now

Violent Delights (on serial killer media)

‘Romeo and Juliet’ Stars Sue Paramount for Child Abuse Over Nude Scene in 1968 Film

Want stronger friendships? Pull out your notepad.

How our solo homes became cocoons

Can't Buy Me Love: How Romance Wrecked Traditional Marriage

Love Boats: The Delightfully Sinful History of Canoes

Air travel: America’s magnum opus

The TSA is a waste of money that doesn't save lives and might actually cost them

You’re already on stolen land. You might as well pay rent.

How Lesbian Potlucks Nourished the LGBTQ Movement

A Toast to Wine Wednesday: Why the potluck is one of the most enduring and beautiful ways queer people make family.

Style Gone Wild: Why We Can't Shake the 1970s

Marriage should not come with any social benefits or privileges

‘Avatar’ and the Headache of High Frame Rate Filmmaking

The Number Ones: Beyoncé's Crazy in Love

Stick ‘em up! A surprising history of collage

On touching grass (which prompted a reread of Everyone Is Beautiful and No One Is Horny)

Like a Bitch in Heat: How I Embrace My Wildish Nature in Sex

How to Merge Sensuality with Sexuality

Startup Uses AI Chatbot to Provide Mental Health Counseling and Then Realizes It 'Feels Weird'

Something Bothering You? Tell it to Woebot.

Deeper into Movies: The Scream Gap

Joe Jonas Bucks Gender Norms By Embracing Injectable Ageism

Eat Shit, Kim Kardashian

Beyond Books: How can libraries help make the world a greener place?

society's sex binary + how pleasure can be the antidote

Ace Erotics: Or, Why You're Thinking About Sex and Eroticism All Wrong

Between Love and Tinder: Investigating the Erotic Friendship

The short instructional manifesto for relationship anarchy

What It’s Like Being a Relationship Anarchist

HBO’s Wokeified Scooby-Doo Reboot Achieves the Impossible

Why I’m Breaking Up With Non-Monogamy

The contagious visual blandness of Netflix

Why Does Everything On Netflix Look Like That?

Pre-Baby Conversations with Friends: Rituals for friendship evolution

How to Show Up For Your Friends Without Kids — and How to Show Up For Kids and Their Parents

Worshipping At The Altar of Artificial Intelligence

Why Influencers Shifted from Wellness to Skincare Content, Facial Contouring as Self-Rejection, Industralized Skincare's Self-Care Problem

Where Are All The Eyebrows? A brief look at the bleached brow trend.

books:

the ethical slut

tacky: love letters to the worst culture has to offer (finished)

little weirds (reread)

[fat5lut]

Like every other human being on this planet, i need support in my creative and emotional endeavors.

I've dedicated myself to them for some years now.

in 2021, I had a creative vision - Write an album , titled "Cunt," with a picture of collage art and donald trump on the front of it.

THIS IS THE ALBUM! AND YOUR Support means so much, your support means that we can change the world.

we need to identify and support and love artists that are willing to take risks, and buck the status quo.

straight, white, sober men who are willing to be vulnerable. doesnt everyone bitch about this? well LOOK NO FURTHER!

Trumpers are in pain, they are in the same pain as you and I, they are in the same pain as every idiot throughout time immemoriam that loved some despotic buffoon - because, in one way or another, THEY FELT UNHAPPY / fucked.

I have to put to the side what you or other people may think of me now. The truth has no pricetag. We could be looking at the most momentus time in the history of the United States of America, and certainly the history of the modern western world.

Americans are generally dumb - why? they are afraid, i'd reckon. the education system makes you into a cog. bernie sanders would've put us on the path to un-ailing alot of the shit that bothers us now, however we falsely phophesize, or hear this prophesized, that he is a some leftist scumbag. He's an Eisenhower democrat, to quote Noam Chomsky!!!!

Now, you'e either going to listen to me , or not, and I don't really give a fuck. Bzut i absoteluy need to seek out those who are willing to support me - i wrote a blog post the other day, i mean i'm afraid to speak my truth - aren't we all? We live in a time of universal deceit.

I'm sick of fucking silencing myself, largely due to a fear of upsetting liberals (lol). I strangely find myself empathizing with moderates or conservatives more - even leftists in America , i mean America's disease is kind of this woke liberal IDpol and PC stuff now. I mean it effects me, and its good to be polite, but the land of the free is anythiung but that.

i didnt vote and i dont give a fuck about that. fucking sue me. maybe the democrats should fire open a better candidate? I will not be victim bla,med for not supporting a system of repression and bullshit that forced bernie out, that creates a coward in bernie who has to pull out just to keep his job. thing's couldn't been different - well, they weren't and now we are seeing what America is really up to these days.

people don't make these decisions, we see the policy getting WORSE and WORSE and WORSE! I deserve to be fucking heard, as do YOU AND ALL HUMANS! ALL truthtellers. It is our fucking human right, one way right wrong or indifferent. They talk about healthcare is a human right - no its not lol but freedom from threat to my life, freedom from economic worry and freedom TO express myself SHOULD BE INALIENABLE rights.

History continues to repeat itself, as Slavoj zizek states - the mask is more real than the person, at times.Our true feelings lie in our darkness.

Hitler kissed his dog, but burned 5-7 million jews alive.

Its those in power that enable this bullshit - germany turned around quick but they had to be put to the brink of their sanity and shit and just be absolutely insane before they did. will we reach the same fate?

strangely our constitution is quite sound. otherwise we'd be fucked. i fear more for the UK and germany, and other european countries like Bulgaria where the government has the chance to be more volatile.

I won't sit in silence anymore. Look at 1999, look at the 90s and early 2000s. look at the incredible activisim in our country. the country has just HARPOONED itself backwards 50 years, repealing abortion, these absolutely bonkers decisions. thats not even the one that matters at the top! U just look at everything, beginning with NAFTA, oh and don't get me started on CLinton. bombing the fuck out of yugoslavia - fuck that war criminal, just like EVERY OTHER SINGLE WAR CRIMINAL PRESIDENT WE HAVE HAD SINCE TEDDY FUCKING BALL GAME FUCKING ROOSEFULY IN THE 1920s!!!!! OUR COUNTRY BREEEEEEDS TERRORISM !!!!!!!!!! Obama and trump D Stryked the same syrian family, look it up . intercept article.

FB doesnt let you quote sources, what a fucking surprise. fuck this jenky platform, silencing my ass cuz im speaking the truth and what not.

this is my fucking album and u will hear me fucking roar. dont be retarded enough to think kamala does better. that way you - would you rather die with 3 to the chest and bleed to death or one to the head? (b Beane) - trump offers us an opportunity to come together and overcome all of this fucking bullshit our country has done - to reconcile slavery, the genocide, and the fucking pitiful system of repressive, economic brutalityl. the trumps dont wage war but the capitalist economy they dick sjuck certainly wages war against our souls . it destabilizes the environment. does anyone carE? do u hear me? are u too fat and fucking dumb to listen to the truth? no

i know u arent i just know that like me you possess and insatiable thrist for freedom, for truth, fuck inalienable rigghts and despotic freedom to END. despotic fake ass freedom to END my power is not in the vote my powers is in my right to kick ya fuckin ass - WE HAVE THE RIGHT TO OVERTHROW THE UNJUST GOVERNMENT

WE HAVE THE RIGHT TO OVERTHROW THE TYRANTS

we NEED the RIGHT TO EXPRESS our TRUE SELVES AND our INALIENABLE RIGHTS

THEY OWNED SLAVES AND UR MIND IS A SLAVE TO THEIR BULLSHIT NOW

i am no longer a slave, i am free of your judgement (kinda) and also fucking free of worrying what the fuck these idiots are going to do to me when I speak true and free in the light and in the name of our Fucking lord JESUS CHRIST goddamnit. he was the fuckiong savior and the fucking man, but you dont care do you>

jesus was a rebel. fuck all of this other gay eucharist shit, who really gives a fuck about that? he was fucking causing a ruckus and fucking flipping overturning synagogue tables and shit. hed despise the church as it exists (exponentially) - mostly, but in general, some places get it right,

Shrine catholic church - a fucking shit institution - has homeless people outside of it ALL THe time. do they care? no... they dont give a FAT FIDDLERS fuck, a flying fat fiddlers fuck if i may , about people who are suffering and shit

they do not care if i say what i need to say and i may what i may

they do not go with my name cuz they need a scapegoat and a fame that my name

provides.

Jesus wouldnt have cared, jesus wouldve fucking burnt down these churches , the way RATM burned the fucking shitty american flag at their concerts! (actly low key love the flag lol)

you don't give a fuck about the poor, or the sick, or the fucking destitute, no one on this shit stained planet (murica) gives a flying fuck. the country is so fucking far to the fucking RIGHT Its unbelievable! democrats are no longer even liberal, i mean kamala is bush '04 , basically,

niggas need they head checked man. shit is fucking stupid at this point. i dont care what you say about me, i dont give a fuck what you think about me nigga. the truth needs to come out and we need to light a fire of love and peace and unity and ANGER on this fucking world and express our goddamn selves with TRUTH AND LIGHT~!!!!!!!!!!!

im afirad to say nigga or retarded or gay. why? i spent my middle school years doing it, do u hate middle school robbie? do i say nigga to trigger u? no , i just say it cuz I am enflamed with a rage that, well u probably know it, u probably have it somewhere deep inside your motherfucking belly. it comes out of the injustices and far reaching slavery this country was founded upon. the injustice fountain, flowing vigorously

this fucking country - ENACTED and FOUNDED on the geonicde of the natives, founded on the slavery of the black Africans, and still you create them as a lower class and still you treat them like shit and STILL- STILL you fucking create a culture of genocide around the native americans , you enslave them to liquor and casinos and perpetrate hell onto their once sacred lands. (spits) IT MAKES ME SICK!!!!

i say nigga in solidarity. i say nigga, well to quote the dude who wrote the book "N*GGER" - someone like eminem - he cannot fully be accepted into black culture if he cannot use this word. so i use it expressively , i use it with creative license , because i dont give a fuck, patti smith didnt give a fuck and neither do i now (mostly)

the spiritual contemplate contemporary slave energy of this shit fuck stained system called capitalism really weighs on me man, its fucked up and its bad. it rapes our soul. you get mad at me cuz i say nigga, but every single capitalist that exploits labor is more of a piece of shit than me! black people, they are not the one who should be called N*gger, - if it exists (and it shouldnt) - its Teh WHITE man who exploits, its the WHITE man who enslaves, its the businessman who PROJECTS his own self hatred onto YOU! WHy? because his own spanish and german and irish ancestors had THEIR souls raped, had THEIR lands raped had THEIR property stolen by the moors and the catholics and the romans - so they project it on to YOU and your BLACK soul or WHITE soul or ORANGE soul (trump included) or PURPLE OR GREEn on red yellow brown SOUL! They falsely imprison your mind and your PURPOSE and align you to SECOND GUESS and disbelieve YOURSELF!!!! its false, its fake and it's not fucking real..

the real n*Gger is the white man, the white slave owner, the one who called you n*GGER, that is the one who views himself as such and the one who deserves to be called it. If you enslave another human being, do you deserve to live? do you deserve to be shot? i believe in the right to bear arms cuz i know a nigga needs to fucking protect his fucking ass from the fuckin police! Fuck this no armaments shit! bunch of HOOEY! i fuckin despise guns, sure, but i know a nigga needs one next to me if he's gonna exist and protect himself in the most racist society known to fucking man.

who should be disarmed? the POLICE! fucking police should be disarmed. I SHOULDN' t be on fuckin trial - the POLICE should be on TRIAL, the GOVERNMENT should be ON FUCKING TRIAL - THIE WHITE HOUSE should be on fucking trial. fuck me with this crap! HA! Im on trial! I NEED TO VOTE! YOU NEED TO FUCKING DIE ! U NEEEd to PROVIDE ME WITH BETTER OPTIONS! and then WHAT HAPPENS When a nigga gets a gun to protect himself? he gets his fuckiing throat slit by this slavery mindset society.

VOTE! THey say...? nah man I will brandish a fucking weapon. i will take my life INTO MY OWN HADNS, i will protect and EMBOLDEN AND SECURE MY LIFE from the fuckers. fuck the seekers of death and hatred and destruction. who kills? who kills nations ? who genocides people? who detroys the environment? do you? do me? do i? do we? nah nigga its the fucking GOVERNMENT its the fucking CORPORATIONS its the fucking IDIOTS who THINK! THEY THINK THEY CAN SILENCE you by making you miserable

they pollute your stream and then yell at you for fucking shitting in it. they pollute you airways and then yell at you for driving to work , for driving to a job you have NO CHOICE in , no CHOICE IN the matter, no CHOICE IN THE SYSTEM _ WHAT IS THE CHOICE? TO VOTE? THIS IS THEIR CHOICE! THEse fake fucks these fake ass niggas make YOU THINK ITS A CHOICE! IT IS NOT! its as much of a choice between black and brown bread, being between kinda moldy or shitty bread. its not a choice as much as a b c d are the answers when F ISNT on the fuckin page and u know it aint one they tell u it is.

so im done, fucking care. im done giving a fucking shit. we need to speak up, we need to speak our TRUTHS!~! we need to bring the LIGHT TO the world! In light of all of this other fucking bullshit. MY NEEDS MATTERS as do fucking YOURS! I MATTER AND MY FUCKING VOICE MATTERS! IT CAN heal as much as it many disrupt, it WILL HEAL because when u shine a motherfuckin LIGHT into the moldey darkened bread thats how u SEE IT nigga thats how u can finally fucking GET RID OF IT - TRUTH LOVE. HONESTLY SELF RESPECT UNDENIABLE ANGER SELF EXPRESSIOn CURIOISITY DEMAND RESPECT BREACH THE HATERS AND KILL THEM LOVE YOURSELF!!! LOVE GOD AND THE ONE WHO MATTERS!

[icantbelieveitsnotbankocracy]

Thanks for the tag bby!!!! I too, love to lie!!!!

Last Song: Ya'll Want a Single (Say Fuck That) -Korn

Favorite Color: Indigo or Velvet Black

Sweet/Savory/Spicy: Spicy. I'm just built different ig. Just dangerous like that.

Currently Watching: Jacob Two Two for the nostalgia lmao

Relationship Status: Taken (kill me)

Current Obsession: Meditation (and what about it????? Literally sue me??????) Idk I've been looking in to economy alot recently too and why our society's economy is projected to fail so drastically in the next century. Also Arby's Horsey Sauce and making seasonal lock screen collages.

Nine people i'd like to get to know better:

Tagged by: @bell-of-indecision, thank you so much for tagging me <3

Last Song: Gmfu by Odetari,6arelyhuman

Favourite colour: Dark red, violet, pink

Currently watching: Death note, ep6

Spicy/Savoury/Sweet: Spicy

Relationship status: Single

Current Obsession: Mbti types and cognitive functions.

Tagging: @somin-yin @a-cloud-for-dreams @axepen @hinsaa-paramo-dharma @basic-bitch-alkali @rhysaka @blackknight-100 @squishywizardd @reykalot

[all-my-love-for-harry]

For the night.

summary: harry spends the night for the first time

word count: 1.9k

Based on this request:

“So for shy little boy could you maybe do a part where it’s Harry first time spending the night or maybe even the morning after👀👀👀👀 also I love this mini series your amazing love keep up the good work!!!!!!!”

and 

“Hi, I hope you're doing great. I'm obsessed with my shy little boy, it's so fricking good, like you're so talented girl! I have a request if you don't mind. Like when they start getting serious and y/n tells Harry what happened with Artemis' biological dad. Xx”

you can find more of my shy little boy here

*:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･: *:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･:*:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･: *:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･:

August, 2018.

Date nights were fun. Going out on the weekends wasn’t something Y/N did often. Before Harry was in her life, she didn’t make a lot of time for dates. The majority of the men she met weren’t looking for a serious relationship and Y/N was tired to just sleep around.

At first she thought it would be the same with Harry. They’d go on a couple of dates, perhaps even sleep together then they’d continue with their lives like nothing happened.

However, Harry was full of surprises and he did not back off in any moment. Not when she cancelled dinner one night after Artemis fell sick out of nowhere, not when she told him she couldn’t spend the night at his place because she had errands to run next morning. He never seemed to be bothered if she had things to do or if she was busier than anyone he’s ever dated because she had a son.

Which, to be honest, wasn’t something she saw a lot. Her dates usually ended after she revealed she had a son, not that she cared anyway. Anyone who had a problem with Artemis wasn’t worth her time.

“All I’m saying is you should have more fun with that boy” Her mother Ella said, chopping some vegetables. It was Saturday, she was supposed to go on a date with Harry tonight and they were going to take care of Artemis, but they stopped by earlier to have lunch together. “You don’t always have to be home before eleven”

“We have fun, okay? Besides, I think eleven is a reasonable hour to go back home” she shrugged. “And Harry is not a boy, mum, He’s a man”

“Even better!” She exclaimed. Y/N shook her head while laughing, her mother was impossible sometimes. “Artemis can spend the night here too, if you want. That way, you shouldn’t be worried to get home early”

“I don’t know…” Y/N looked at her mother, who raised her eyebrow at her. "Ugh, okay” She sighed.

Truth to be told, she was kind of excited to have a full night free. Things with Harry were looking great, they did have so much fun together and every time she felt closer to him. He was a nice, kind man who seemed as interested as Y/N was.

Around 5pm Y/N left her mothers’ house to get ready for dinner with Harry, he’ll pick her up at seven o’clock so she had plenty of time to get ready before he arrived. She chose a navy blue dress with a pair of heels that matched, her makeup was done in less than an hour.

She was done just in time and Harry knocked at her door at seven, being punctual as always. “Hello, beautiful” He smiled as soon as she open the door. “These are for you” He pulled out from behind his back a bouquet of flowers.

“Harry, these are stunning” One of her hands touched her chest right where her heart was. “Thank you. Come in, I’ll put them in water and we can go”

He stepped into the house and waited in the living room for Y/N. She came back with the flowers in a vase and put them on a table behind the couch. “Ready?” He asked.

“Of course. Let’s go”

The restaurant Harry made reservations in wasn’t so far from her house, so the ride wasn’t that long. As the gentleman he was, Harry opened her door and helped her step out of the car, they walked towards the doors of the building and he opened them again for her.

“This place is nice” She said when they sat down on their table.

“I friend of fine recommended it, thought you’d like it”

“Well, I love Italian food” Harry gave her a dimpled smile, happy to please her.

They had a very lovely night, as always. With each date they had, their level of trust increased more. What Harry really liked about Y/N was how down to earth she was. Even though she was extremely smart, she never made him feel dumb. He loved listening to her, it made him feel normal.

Driving back to Y/N house, Harry thought it would be the end of the evening, so it was fair to say he was surprised when Y/N invited him to come in. “I had this bottle of wine and I’d hate to drink it alone” She batted her eyelashes at him, making him grin.

“That would be a shame, wouldn’t it?” He smirked before getting out of the car. He held Y/N hands all the way to her front door and waited for her to unlock it. They entered and she went to the kitchen for the wine. Harry looked around, Y/N had lots of framed pictures of her and Artemis, with friends and family.

He saw a photo book on the coffee table, ‘collage’ was written on the cover. He sat on the sofa and took another look to the cover. There was a picture of Y/N and some other people, she was next to a guy who was holding her waist and she was smiling big. “That’s Caleb, Artemis’ biological father” She said, coming with two glasses of wine.

“You don’t have to-” He started saying.

“I want to, honestly. It’s not a big deal, really” She sat down next to him, kicking off her heels. “We met back in high school. He was a nice guy, or so I thought” She took a sip of her wine. “We dated for a while then we went to collage together”

Harry put a hand on her knee for support and she sighed. “We didn’t use protection one night and next thing I knew I was pregnant”

“Did you tell him?”

“I did, I took like five tests to make sure it wasn’t a mistake” She sighed. “So, I called him”

“Wait, you told him over the phone?” he said, readjusting on his seat.

“I didn’t know what to do. After I hung up with him I drove to his apartment and he practically slammed the door on my face” Harry clenched his jaw. “Caleb told me he couldn’t do it, that he was too young and wasn’t ready for that responsibility” He raised his eyebrows.

Harry couldn’t understand how someone could give up the opportunity to be with someone as amazing as Y/N, or could refuse to be in their own son’s life. Nothing he’d said would change what Y/N lived in that time, he was just glad she was in his life now.

“I’m sorry” He said.

“Don’t be. He made his choice, I made mine” She gave him a half smile. “My mum’s a lawyer, she wanted to sue him right away but, honestly? Why would I force him to be in Artemis’ life?”

“Anyone who doesn’t want you or Artemis in their life, isn’t worth it” He assured her, holding her hand. “Thank you for opening up with me”

“I know we haven’t really talked about this, but I really like you, Harry” She confessed. “And I do see this going somewhere”

He smiled, dimples in full display. “I feel the same way, Y/N. I-I really don’t know what you’ve done to me” He leaned towards her.

His eyes fell to her lips, they’ve kissed before, however Harry always want his lips on hers. There was something about Y/N that made him want to be close to her at all times. He wasn’t sure if it was her personality or the fact that she was insanely beautiful.

Harry closed the distance between them, kissing her sweetly yet passionately. He cupped her face with his hands to pull her closer, as if that was possible.

Before any of them knew, Y/N was straddling Harry’s lap. They broke the kiss to take a breath, but she started planting little peeks all the way from his neck to his lips again. When she started rolling her hips, grinding against him, Harry grabbed her waist.

“I’d love to continue, but we’ve been drinking, love” He whispered before placing a kiss on her forehead. She nodded, sighing.

“Would you like to spend the night?” She pulled away just enough to take a look at his face. He offered her a smile and she poked his dimple.

“It depends. Do you snore?” he joked making her giggle while shaking her head. “In that case, I think I can stay”

She flashed him another smile before getting off of his lap. She took his hand to lead the way towards her bedroom. “I’m sorry I don’t have anything you can borrow to sleep in”

“It’s fine, love. Are you okay with me sleeping in my briefs?”

“Yeah, make yourself comfortable” She went to the bathroom to get changed into her pajamas and returned with a spare toothbrush for him.

“Thank you” He smiled and peeked her lips before going into the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

Y/N laid on bed. This would be the first time they’d sleep in the same bed, and she found herself wondering if he was of the cuddling type of he’d want to be left alone. She definitely liked to be held while sleeping, for sure.

Harry exited the bathroom and walked to the bed. Y/N finally had a good look at all the tattoos on his torso. It was impossible not to stare, he was perfect in all senses.

He laid on the bed next to her. At first, Y/N was too scared to touch him so she stayed still. Harry chuckled when he saw her hesitation and opened his arms, inviting her to lay on his chest.

Sighing happily, Y/N got comfortable on her new position. Harry’s chest was warm, soft but hard at the same time. Their legs were tangled in no time, making the space between them nonexistent.

Y/N could definitely get used to this.

*:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･: *:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･:

When Harry opened his eyes, it took him a moment to remember where he was. He grinned when he felt her move a little against him. “Morning, sunshine”

Y/N looked up, offering him a tired smile. “Good morning”

“How long have you been awake?”

“Just a couple of minutes. My biological clock doesn’t let me sleep in much. Having a very enthusiastic kid does that to you” She chuckled softly.

“Do you have plans today?”

“Not really, just pick Artemis up from my mums’ house” Y/N covered a yawn with the back of her hand. “Why?”

“Thought I could cook you some breakfast”

“That would be nice”

Both of them went out of bed, Harry put his pants back on but stayed shirtless and Y/N put a robe on top of her pajamas. Harry took her hand again and intertwined their fingers. “Have you ever tried kale smoothies?”

She was about to answer but another voice interrupted her. “Artemis, wait!” Harry saw a little body came running down the hall, before he could run back to Y/N’s room, Artemis had already spotted them.

“Hi, Harry” He mumbled, playing with his hands.

“Hey, buddy” He said nervously.

“And who’s this?” He heard a new voice and looked up. He saw one of Y/N’s mums standing there with a huge smirk on her face so he looked down at Y/N, who had her face red from embarrassment.

Well, what a nice way to meet the parents.

☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁☁

taglist!!

@myfavfanficsever @odetostep @la-cey @cock-a-doodely-doo @awkwardbullfrog @mellamolayla @moorgannn @bagtan-serendipity @awesomebooklover17 @finelineribs @sunnybusiness @beanholland @sweetenerstyle @cronias13 @vhsharry @maisley @seasidecrowbar @stylesfics-xx @autumnpauley20 @fineline-hs1 @stephaniemalvie @immajustreadwritereblog @jadert15 @iguessweallcrazyithinktho

[aquariusshadow]

Live!Blogging HSMTMTS s2x8

Well, well, well, who would’ve thought my streaming site would have the episode up early. I can finally get a Live!Blog done at a decent time for once.

Rip Rini. That’s my only prediction for this ep.

Lesss goooooo

--

“napoleon over here” jfc haha

“because winners don’t freak out” good mantra miss jenn

Lets take a shot how many times Ricky says “Nini”—I’m at 2 already with one minute in

Awwwwwwww look at gina giving ej pointers for the dancing

“biggie” idk how I feel about that nickname for big red but you do you Ashlyn

Why am I surprised that this rendition is really good

Big red you’re killing it

To any of yall who remember Unus Annus (memento mori ☹ ) plz tell me you remember their “version” of the gaston song???

Cuz that’s all im thinking about

EJ your voice is so good we’ve been robbed this entire show

Beautiful, absolutely beautiful, well done well done

Awwww poor seb

Tbf I’d probably try that out too ngl haha

We’re already calling ricky ‘you-know-who’ and this show is well known for it’s harry potter references…..yikes

3

Asdlhjsdlhfasdfh

“No offense Ricky, but it’s not all about you.” Daaaaaaaaamn

Ricky

Sir

What are you doing

Why

Aldfaksjdfahsdf

Yes asking people to collab is legit

Yes this could also be some creep

But stop being clingy and obsessive ricky good lord

Oh so NOW he regrets one of his bad choices with nini

4

Hehe portwell smiling at each other all throughout the ep

HFLDKJHGJFGGH

WAIT

ARE WE ADDRESSING IT

EJ LIKES HER HOLY SHIT

AJDFALHSDJFASDLFHASDFJASDFLASDFJASDFHASKFDJASDLFS

I MEAN IT WAS OBVIOUS

BUT I DIDN’T KNOW IF/WHEN/HOW THEY WERE GONNA ADDRESS IT

I stg if my video doesn’t stop glitching imma sue something

Oooooooooo ej’s dad

Oh

Oh no

Ej never told his dad about duke

WAIT

HIS DAD PULLED STRINGS TO GET HIM IN

Sir

Mr sir

Mr fucking sir

Of course he’s one of those parents

Miss jenn does have a strong soprano range I’ll give her that

Poor seb

He just wanted some rehearsal time

5

Honestly ricky I think you can still call her nini

6

Even big red is tired of listening to the same shit with ricky

7

I do feel for the kid but man

Ooooo kourt’s mom

I like how we’re seeing more of the parents

Her mom is so supportive

That’s so nice to see

Yaaay some of their relationship was real afterall

Even tho Howie scuffed up

Yea kourt you tell him

Yea I have a feeling ricky just kinda froze while taking the career apititude test

8

“I did not come home for you” hell yea nini you tell him

Everyone in the restaraunt is just staring lmao

Rip Rini?

I will be very very very mad if they make up at the end of the ep and continue on like nothing happened

Awwwwww Ashlyn made a Big Red career collage that’s so cute

Oooooooooh I see the conflict now ok

Big red you should tell her what you really want

There you go

Look at that communication

Rini take notes

Awwwwww mazzarra made her a lil mini snack/coffee table to help her relax

That’s very sweet

And he’s the only one of her love-interests that actually knows how to HELP her

Man he’s smitten with her isn’t he

Gina’s hair is so pretty here I love it

She smiles every time she sees ej ehehe

And he’s helping her crochet <3

Look at portwell’s communication skills here

Maaaaaaaan

Even tho they are different

Both of them are listening to each other and are still helping each other

While rina had stuff like that in common

Season 2 scuffed them so bad gina was just unhappy

Aka gina’s list on why she likes ej

This is so cute

Jasljdsflhasdf

“you’d see what I-the rest of us see”

Plz don’t play with my heart yall

I wasn’t sure if Gina liked him back romantically or not

Portwell Nation rise up

Ashlyn I love you but whyyyyy did you ruin the momenttttttt

Oh my god

Why are Rini being happy and cute when they JUST blew up at each other

Im so confused

Is that normal for relationships?

To go from a major fight then being super cute and happy like nothing happened????

Ok now we’re talking about it…..

“At YAC I liked who I was there” uh…Nini weren’t you kinda miserable there?

Oooooooooo

Here’s the thing

Right now Ricky is clinging onto the safety feeling

And Nini JUST said she didn’t want to be ‘safe’

Im glad he told her about the insta comment

Are they….are they actually breaking up now?

Alright this is probably the best way they both could’ve ended things

A mutual, understanding, emotion filled break up with no hard feelings

That’s gonna help both of them in the future I think

Assuming the writers don’t throw them back together at the end of the episode

9

My heart does go out to them tho :/

Howie does have a very nice voice

LOOK AT DOMESTIC PORTWELL

GUYS LOOK AT THAT

THAT’S SO CUTE

HE PUT A BLANKET OVER HER LIKE COME ON

SHE FELT SAFE ENOUGH TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH NEXT TO HIM

rina could never at least right now

Ok we got all the ships in this song

Except for Rini

If this is foreshadowing im very content

Awwww ricky ☹

Beautiful Howie

I loved that so much

Great voice

Great ending to an episode

--

Did I actually keep track of how many times Ricky said “Nini” in this episode? Yes, yes I did. It helped me stay more focused ironically enough. Luckily half of those were in conversation with Nini so that wasn’t awful lmao.

So I was right about Rip Rini. Incredible. Hopefully they stay broken up for a while and focus on themselves. RICKERAPY CAN FINALLY SHINE!!!!!

Also, EJ likes Gina confirmed? Portwell nation, how we feelin today?

[indomies]

#showyourprocess

From planning to posting, share your process for making creative content!

To continue supporting content makers, this tag game is meant to show the entire process of making creative content: this can be for any creation.

RULES — When your work is tagged, show the process of its creation from planning to posting, then tag up to 5 people with a specific link to one of their creative works you’d like to see the process of. Use the tag #showyourprocess so we can find yours!

sabrina @lanwangiji​, my love, tagged me to share my process of making this typography edit! check out her explanation of her the untamed edit and her edit tag. 

1. PLANNING

i once opened lyrics edit requests so i can learn and practice typography. this edit was a request as well. i asked them which lyrics they wanted to have and the colors they’d like. since i got several requests and it was hard to keep tabs on them, i made a trello board so i could organize everything. i’m still using the trello board for every edit idea i have, the board makes my life easier.

above is what i filled the card in the board with. basically just information of the requests.

1.1 INSPIRATION

once i got the request, my first thought was to find the vibe the song/lyrics exude. “it’s an old curse” screamed witchy vibes to me, so i went to pinterest to find some inspirations. at first i was looking for witchy poster designs and i came across this. i liked how it has smoke-ish graphic and i thought the smoke suited the “old curse” lyrics. and tbh pinterest is a rabbit hole, they gave me suggestions after suggestions, like this and this which became my inspiration for the color palette (i added the gold from those pics) and the sun moon design gave me the idea to incorporate space stuffs too. i somehow landed on this too, and because i wanted to include space theme, i made a simple phases of the moon. ultimately the hero of this edit was the lyrics, i didnt want the graphics took the center stage. i was inspired to make a crystal ball and do this kind of typography but after several trials i couldnt get the the typography right, so i scratched that idea and went with the space theme instead.

1.2 PICKING COLORS

after i was feeling inspired enough, i went looking for the right colors. i usually just type “color name” and “palette” on pinterest. example “dark grey color palette” and i chose the one i liked best. when the request only asked for 1 color, i always searched for either a complimentary or contrasting color to give it a jushz, to add sprinkles. that’s why i added gold on top of the dark grey. 

1.3 FINDING FONTS

this is the hardest part. the fonts play important role to the design. they need to convey the vibes of the lyrics, in this case witchy/magic vibe. i needed to find fonts or font just as magical and a bit whimsical. tho i hoard fonts... i like to use new font for every typography edit lmao sue me.

i highly recommend going to creativemarket free goods site, pixelsurplus font freebies and behance to search for fonts. i always use 100% free fonts, that means i can use it personally as well as commercially. creativemarket gives me desktop license for the fonts, which means i can use it for commercial as well. the reason i do this because i want to open an etsy shop someday, and i want to have the right license when i sell my stuffs. i almost never buy fonts bc they are expensive lmao. 

the fonts in used are “Vintage” for the main typograpy (i think i was a freebie from creativemarket) and “Morganite” for the title of the lyrics and the name of artist. 

2. CREATING

once i have my materials and ideas, i open my illustrator and hope it doesnt crash every 5 min.

for this kind of typography edits, i use 600x700 px. tbh i dont like using 540px, the suggested tumblr size, as the width bc to me it doesn’t look as good in quality, so i up the px. but more on this sizing later. i utilize the artboards function in illustrator, and i use 2 artboards.

i use illustrator (ai) bc i’m working with vectors. when i work with vectors, the graphics/texts or whatever im making in ai wont become blurry or lose its quality when i enlarge or shrink it. in compare to photoshop, i need to make for example the moon graphic very big, so i wont lose the quality when i reduce and enlarge it again. with vector, i can start small and when i expand it, it’s still as good as when it’s tiny. 

2.1 GRADIENTS

i started with the gradients first. i created a rectangle as big as 600x700px and with the “freeform gradient” tool in ai, i played with the colors. below is the color palettes i used

2.2 LYRICS AND GRAPHICS

once the gradients are done, i worked with the lyrics and graphics right away. when i first doing this edits, i made typos a lot lmaooooooo. so i copy and pasted the lyrics on top of my artboard, so i wouldnt have any typos. 

i had 3 layers in my ai. one for the inspo pics and the OG lyrics. the rest for the edits themselves. i broke up “It's an old curse/dreamers diving headfirst” into to parts, hence the 2 more layers

i almost always started with the lyrics first then the graphics. but for this edit, i made the smoke first so i can layout where my text would be.

tbh the process of making the lyrics is a trial and error. i tried bunch of different stuffs and i chose whatever the best. but i worked like methodically, i made sure i finished the first part of the lyrics first then i could move on.

i was lucky with this font “vintage”. the font offers me several glyphs like these

and i chose the one at the bottom. you’re very lucky if you find a font and they have glyphs.

excursion: glyphs vs fonts

glyph is an individual character. It might be a letter, an accented letter, a ligature, a punctuation mark, a dingbat, etc.

A font is a digital file which is used to display a typeface, which contains the entire upper- and lowercase alphabet as well as punctuation, numbers, and other special characters.

after i was finished with all the lyrics i added some graphics to make the edit pretty like small stars or dots. i added the song title and the artist too, sometimes at the bottom sometimes at the top. and i added my watermark put it as small as i could and made it a bit invisible but still can be seen.

2.3 EXPORTING

exporting! this is where i’m going to go deeper with the dimension of my work. in ai, i always choose to save with “export as screens” function. it automatically divides the artboards i have and save them separately. i always save as png, bc the size is smaller than jpg but can maintain the quality.

now the export tab looks like this

see the formats? i always scale up my edits, 2-3 times the original artboard size. reason is, to maintain the quality. i have tried to save it as original, 600x700 px, but it turned out a bit blurry. bc everything in ai is vector, when i scale up it doesnt lose the quality. BUT once i save it as png, it’s not a vector anymore, and when you zoom in until a certain degree it’ll be pixelated. that’s why i always scale up, to avoid it becoming pixelated when it’s just zoomed 1 or 2 times.

2.4 FINAL TOUCH

i opened my photoshop and also pray it won’t crash. import the png of my edits, add some grains/noise. the reason i use photoshop is, the noise filter is way better than in ai. it’s smoother somehow. and then i export my edits.

(i have a timelapse of how i made one of my edits, it’s not this one, but it’ll give you a better visualization. find it HERE

3. POSTING

now the hardest parts are done, we go to posting!

i uploaded the 2 posters on tumblr as photos then i wrote the captions. for this typography edit, i always chose another lyrics that i like from the same song for the caption. i bolded the lyrics, add link to all of my typography gradient edits.

i always use this link to color my caption. i usually choose 3-4 colors, and i took the colors from my edit. but this was not until recently lmao. before i just took a guess and looked for similar colors that match the edit, but then i thought “why didnt i just use the color in the posters lmao”

ok after i have my html code for the caption, i go to this site to replace the “;” with “ “ so tumblr can read the code.

i’m not one who puts their edits in draft, bc i just cant wait to post it. i have to option here, either i post it immediately when the time is right (i usually post between 4-8) or i schedule it, if im finished before 4. 

i put all the necessary tags and click post! i am done finally!

i’m tagging:

@thetriangletattoo​ for this amazing series

@deludedandlostcause​ for this impressive gif

@half-lightl​ for this spectacular edit

@gayndrew​ for this stunning drawing

@thechampagnelovers​ for this cool collage

@cloudslou​ for this incredible edit

@heyangels​ for this incredible edit

[true-autistic-tales]

welcommee back to my review and ranking of my forever slowly dying hyperfixation, ive left a link on the top to the previous post incase this is your first time seeing this, but anyhooo onto the first half of season 3 under da cut >:D

forced family fun part 1

the hecks go camping, hijinks ensue while also being partly a flashback episode. i enjoy brick and mike bonding while fishing, it's cute. even ray romano makes an appearance at the end and almost entirely throughout the next part. also i found an error with the subtitles, when brick and mike go fishing, brick says:

"my pole is all bendy."

but the subtitles put it as:

"m pole is all bendy."

forced family fun part 2

i love how they make jokes of nicky, ray romano, and frankie, patricia heaton, cuz they were also on everybody loves raymond together, also playing as a married couple with two sons and one daughter. when i first watched this though i was very confused why this nicky dude was in it but now since im cultured, aka watched 2 seasons of everybody loves raymond, i understand. i love how axl angrily trots off to his tent, it's hilarious. i kinda love nicky, he's a funnyman, also ive noticed how many depressing characters are in this show like they all got problems. good episode, above the first half.

hecking order

after countless annoyances by sue, axl decides to get his revenge by suggesting sue should try out for swimming which is on the other side of their campus, while brick has issues with his new teacher even though his teacher is really cool. the ending was very sweet, good episode, above forced family fun part 2. off topic but i just want to note while in writing this one of my besties is explaining chuck e cheese lore to me.

"may i be excused to go step in front of a moving train?"

"it's a family dinner, stuff with the rest of us."

major changes

after frankie accidentally eats axl's toenails while trying to watch wheel of fortune, frankie leaves the hecks, never to be seen again. this episode foreshadows pam staggs, who we seem later in... season 9. see? this is how you do a somewhat funny mental breakdown, especially when it shows frankie in the car, even more of a reason to hate the royal wedding. good episode, above forced family fun part 2.

the test

brick gets harassed by a bully, sue tries out to be a cheerleader, and axl attempts to do his psats. brick "getting out" of the trash is hilarious. i love how they forshadow really weird things like axl's dragon dream being his collage's mascot later. brick is such a smart kid, i love when he explains why bullies bully and how mike starts actually thinking about it, he's a smartass. good episode, above hecking order.

"oh, the bully might be winning right now, but my time will come. [whispering] time will come."

bad choices

axl fakes being sick so he doesn't have to do a test, sue and brad start a play and brick quotes shakespeare. my bobby apears for a bit to suggest frankie to hickory arms, a place he also lives in... with his mom, and is it only me or does his outfit in this episode reminds me a lot of shaggy? frankie being impressed by the most basic of shit at hickory arms is funny but also kinda depressing. i adore the don't text and drive song from sue and brad, it's always amazing even after countless rewatches. i love this episode, it's so good, the top of the list.

"that's democracy in action, jackson!"

halloween 2

sue grows up for a halloween party, brick and frankie got trick-or-treating with his support group, while axl, sean and darrin also go trick-or-treating for a money scam. i adore the ax-men in this episode, they're literally ed, edd n eddy with their level of scams. i also really love the scenes with brick's support group, it's fun as hell. i absolutely love how mike still isn't ready for sue to grow up, and tries to tell her how he feels but fails constantly. another really great halloween episode, top of the list.

heck's best thing

a recuiter for east Indiana state comes to interview axl while sue and brick accidentally gets aunt edie's phone. this weird obsession sue and brick get over this one jesus lighter is humorous. also bob randomly apears again for frankie to vent to while he's trying to put something up for ehlert which just shows how smol he is, i love my short boy. good episode, above hecking order.

"what would jesus lighter say?"

the play

mike grounds axl for being an idiot, brick and rusty bond after rusty stood him up, while frankie, sue and bob try out for a wizard of oz play. i adore all scenes at the play, maybe only because of bob but still- i love the scene where rusty just lets brick drive his automobile, dude, i love rusty, he's absolutely hilarious. great episode, above the test.

"dad let us drive, we turned out okay."

"you wanna rephrase that?"

"okay, uh, dad let we drive, us turned out okay."

thanksgiving 3

the hecks stay over to frankie's family side's place for thanksgiving. axl basically faceplants when it comes to flirting with the registrar girl and it's hilarious, i love it, especially when mike tries to teach axl how to flirt only to look like such a creep. i don't personally like the scene with frankie and janet fighting, it's a bit too realistic for my taste but other than that, good episode, below major changes.

a christmas gift

after frankie sends out an drunken invitation, the hecks with a bunch of other random people celebrate christmas eve while brick becomes an atheist after finally reading the bible and sue tries to stop him.  i really really enjoy all the scenes with reverend timtom, he's so unbelievably cool. i absolutely love loVE LOVE all the scenes with axl and bob, how bob processes the fact that axl calls him bro once and then thinks that they're besties, i love him so much, i love him so so unbelievably much, i would say more but then this would turn into a fictional other gushing post instead of a somewhat in depth ranking post. great episode, above the play.

"[screams quietly]"

year of the hecks

for the new year frankie suggests that everyone should make a new year resolution for each other. i love brad becoming a wrestler, im not even surprised because wrestling is probably the most gayest sport i can imagine, that's not an insult. also in this the wrestlerettes become a thing, i love how they just completely block the view of the actual wrestling. mike trying to smile reminds me of those "cursed images" of weird cats smiling. rereading this i realize how much of a boomer i sounded, i am 15 im not out of touch yet- i love ashley wyman, she's a phineas and ferb stan. axl handing in his late homework thingy and being asked to spell "there" is very hilarious. i absolutely love when frankie and brick hang out at ehlert motors and actually start to bond, it's very nice even if frankie accidentally leaves him at work. another really great episode, above the play.

ranks so far

this season so far has been good, not much else to say, just hopefully the stream will keep on going for this like it has done for the past two.

12. forced family fun part 1

11. forced family fun part 2

10. thanksgiving 3

9. major changes

8. hecking order

7. heck's best thing

6. the test

5. the play

4. year of the hecks

3. a christmas gift

2. bad choices

1. halloween 2

[incorrect-toriko-quotes]

Oh my God, I'm so glad you brought up Coco's past/childhood, the experimentation, etc. in your long post on it because I have being thinking about it for years. So nice to see someone talking about it, and how messed up what happened to him was. Would love to see any other rants/analysis you have on that. For example, it's been a long time since I've read the series, how is Coco's relationship to Ichiryuu/the other Kings presented? Thanks, and really enjoy your posts!

First, I’m glad you’ve been enjoying my posts! The fandom may be small, but its always worth contributing to!

You said you “would love to see any other rants/analysis you have on Coco’s past”, and trust me, I’m more than happy to deliver (believe me when I say I have a HUGE buildup of talking to do about this one specific topic)

Now, under the cut, I’m gonna answer your question on Coco’s relationships with the other characters. And I’m going to make this way more complicated than it needs to be. Because when it comes to the other characters (especially family members), Coco is one of those characters where his relationships have been heavily influenced by his past.

(Apologies in advance for how unnecessarily complicated I made this)

Let’s start with Anon’s question:

How is Coco's relationship to Ichiryuu/the other Kings presented?

Now, obviously, over the course of the series, it changes drastically. But let’s take a look at what we see in the beginning and see where we end up from there. (I’ve been going back through the series start-to-finish, since I’m finally getting to reading the VIZ translations of the manga)

In the beginning...

We all know that Coco was introduced really early in the series, at the beginning of Puffer Whale. He explains that, in order to avoid being hunted down by scientists, he moved to Gourmet Fortune and became a fortune-teller. This is not only to avoid the scientists themselves, but (moreso in the anime), its also mentioned that he tries to avoid the general media, which the scientists could use to find him through.

Now, I don’t know if anyone else remembers, but I’ll include this screenshot from Episode 4: Prepare It! The Poisonous Puffer Whale! The Heavenly King Coco Appears! (Manga equivalent is Gourmet 11: Into the Cavern We Go!!)

(A bit unrelated, but anyone else notice that he literally flinches when Komatsu jumps on him? At first I thought it was just because... that’s what you do when someone jumps on you. But then I got a closer look at this screenshot and realized just how uncomfortable he looks — hell, he looks more like he’s in pain than like he’s been startled.)

I remember seeing this, and seeing his realization that Komatsu isn’t afraid of him. At first I was like: “Okay, yeah. He lives alone in the woods with his crow and avoids other human beings like the plague. He thinks everyone is afraid of him. Makes perfect sense.”

But then I started taking a closer look at his relationship with the rest of the family (Ichiryuu, Rin, and the other Kings), as well as the other characters in general. That’s when I noticed something:

We rarely (if ever) see Coco make physical contact with anyone that isn’t Toriko or Komatsu.

Now, of course, there’s probably some things I’ve missed. But I’ve been trying to keep track of this as I go back through the series.

One thing (shortly after that last screenshot takes place) that Coco mentions is that he’s confused that Komatsu is willing to touch him because of his poison. And a few seconds/pages prior, Toriko was explaining to Komatsu that Coco had been experimented on in the past, and he left his old life behind to live quietly and undisturbed in Gourmet Fortune. And from there, as more of Coco’s character is revealed, we realize that it’s not just people around him being concerned for their own health and well-being (we all remember the fangirls in Gourmet Fortune). It’s that Coco, as a general rule, doesn’t like being touched.

Now, at first (again, in the context of the previous screenshots), we think it’s because of his poison. A mix of “I don’t want to be poisoned” from others and “I don’t want to poison you” from Coco. And obviously (based off his response to Komatsu), this is going to play a part in the reason why.

But then again, I would like to remind you that Coco was, canonically, experimented on. And for those of you who haven’t seen this post I made, it’s actually canon that he was branded a “Dangerous Beast” (by the scientists) when he was either 11 or 12 years old (with the odds being in favour of 11, as he has a birthday fairly late in the year).

(Image from Volume 2: Coco!! (Gourmet 11: Into the Cavern We Go!!) - VIZ Media translation. Yes, it’s the same image from my last post. Sue me.)

Now of course, you can all theorize as to what, specifically, said experimentation entails. (Personally, it just sounds like it would involve a lot of blood-drawing, but again, I think Shimabukuro wants us to make our own theories on this.)

But there’s something else to consider: if his aversions to being around other people (especially being touched), stem more from fear/trauma than from a desire to protect others. (And I think we can all agree that it’s not just introversion... this is more than a little on the ‘extreme’ side)

Now, to be perfectly clear: I’m not really referring to the process of the experimentation. I’m actually referring more to the fact that he was hunted for experimentation, as opposed to the experiments themselves.

One thing that’s always bothered me was the fact that it was the IGO who were hunting him.

Why is this bothersome?

Because the IGO wants to prevent war by beating the evil Gourmet Corp to GOD. Because the president of the IGO goes behind the backs of the corrupt, evil men who hog the food and spend lavishly at the casino to deliver food to children in poverty. Because its very clearly established that Ichiryuu’s a good father! Because, when Sunny, as a child, accidentally broke a cup and cut his arm, instead of focusing on the broken cup, Ichiryuu’s first concern is to look after the cut on Sunny’s arm. 

Because the IGO are supposed to be the good guys.

So when we see them doing morally questionable (and in some cases, morally repulsive) things, it’s jarring.

And even more so for the characters.

Think about this from Coco’s perspective, as an 11 year old child. Just for a moment. Thus far, he has seen the IGO...

Deliver food supplies to children living in poverty

Adopt some of these children (himself included)

Nurse these weak, malnourished children back to health

Raise them in a generally loving environment

Train them to be skilled Gourmet Hunters

I’m sure you’re expecting me to say something like: “He was a literal child, children are trusting!” but looking at this, why wouldn’t he trust them?

And that’s the big thing to consider when looking at his behaviour towards the other characters: The IGO’s repeated experimentation (and attempts at experimentation) were a betrayal of his trust in them.

He’s not just avoiding the scientists and the media by giving up his career as a Hunter. He’s avoiding the IGO as a whole. They betrayed him, and he can’t trust them anymore.

And then I took that back to his general avoidance mannerisms. As I mentioned: Coco rarely (if ever) touches anyone who isn’t Toriko or Komatsu.

(Top left: Volume 15: Zebra!! (Gourmet 125:  Journey to the Underworld!!) Top right: Volume 2: Coco!! (Gourmet 9: The Days of the Four Kings!!) Bottom left: Episode 5: The Deadly Cave Battle! Fire, Five-Fold Spiked Punch! Bottom right: Volume 5: The Regal Plateau!! (Gourmet 41: Confrontation and Invasion!!))

The above collage I made is a bit messy, but I think it serves its purpose. Coco rarely makes physical contact with anybody, and when he does, its with Toriko and Komatsu (and apparently mostly for comedic purposes,)

One thing worth noting, though, is that he does, in fact, offer to shake Sunny’s hand when they meet at Regal Plateau. Sunny declines and responds with...

...but it is worth noting that the offer was made. Sure, this could be interpreted as Coco doing the obligatory Older Sibling job of irritating Sunny, but when he says this, his tone isn’t snide or sarcastic. Furthermore, Coco is known for his reserved nature, and isn’t the type to draw attention to something he doesn’t want noticed. If Coco was truly dead set against Sunny touching him, its very unlikely he would’ve pointed out that Sunny was retracting his Feelers (because, let’s be real, it would be pretty in-character for Sunny to then send out his Feelers solely out of spite)

And that’s pretty much it. He doesn’t even seem to let Ichiryuu or Mansam inside his personal bubble. Every time they’re seen together, he stays a good distance away.

That last part is especially interesting. If Coco was truly keeping his distance solely to avoid poisoning people, then it seems unlikely that he’d come closer to Toriko, Sunny, and especially Komatsu, but avoid Ichiryuu and Mansam. If anybody’s going to be safe for him to be around, Ichiryuu is definitely in the top 3, if not at the very top of the list.

So thus far, we have a few things worth noting on the point of Coco’s general avoidance of all other people:

Coco initially claims that he avoids other people (especially being touched by other people) because of his poison, and is surprised when Komatsu dismisses that concern — in fact, he actually comes to become very close to Komatsu (emotionally) shortly after. More on that later.

Coco was experimented on by the IGO as a child, which was a massive betrayal of his trust in them

The only people he will let touch him are Toriko, Komatsu, and Sunny. He keeps his distance from even Ichiryuu and Mansam.

When everything is accounted for, Coco’s avoidance of other people is more an issue of trust than one of concern for their safety.

While its true that Coco directly says that its an issue almost solely of concern (the aforementioned “I don’t want to poison anyone and nobody wants me to poison them” mentality), if anything, seems more like a defense he’s prepared if he’s asked about it. I wouldn’t call it a lie (if anything, he might’ve even convinced himself that its true — but that’s just further speculation), but its definitely not the hard truth.

Anime-only fans may be surprised by this, but in Volume 3: The Thing!! (Gourmet 17: A Taste of Poison!!), Coco says this:

Makes sense, right? When he gets startled by Starjun’s GT Robot in Cavern Lagoon (literally 4 pages later), he (seemingly instinctively) prepares an extremely lethal poison — and (in the manga) almost collapses afterwards as a result (Hmm... perhaps one day I could try and analyse the effects Coco experiences of using his poison? I think the whump fans might enjoy that one)

But back to the main point: the fact that Coco says this is... odd to me. “Odd” to the point that I went back to recap large parts of the series, and sure enough... I didn’t actually find much in the way of Coco consuming canon alcohol. Things implied to be alcoholic? Yes. Things canonically established to be alcoholic? Ehh... not really.

I could elaborate on that more, but I’ll get back to the point.

The key thing he says here is that he “loses control of his poison”. Again, this makes sense (because again, Starjun’s GT Robot seemed to trigger his poison, and that was an emotional reaction. Surely being drunk would have a similar effect?).

But as I’ve mentioned: he doesn’t go near Ichiryuu, Mansam, or really any other powerful characters. He even keeps Tylan at a distance, and Tylan specializes in neutralizing poison.

But Toriko, Komatsu, and Sunny? They most definitely could not handle most of Coco’s poisons. And in the previous collage (bottom left), Toriko is holding Coco after a fight, mere seconds after Coco had been using his poison, ruling out the possibility that its a matter of situation/circumstance.

Consider now: the relationships Coco has with Toriko, Komatsu, and Sunny.

Coco (at least, at the beginning of the series) is closest to Toriko. They’re on fairly good terms, and their fight with the Devil Python (while containing the occasional playful jab at the other) is not just coordinated, but cooperative. They work well together, and they seem to get along the best out of the Kings.

When it comes to Sunny, sure, their relationship is a little strained. Sunny is jealous of Coco’s ability to make entrances, and has no qualms about saying harsh things that are, on occasion, hurtful. And Coco is still somewhat standoffish towards Sunny. But that’s not to say that they don’t seem to get along at least decently well. Unlike with Zebra, they don’t yell or argue that much. They bond over certain topics, and will still work together.

...I don’t think I need to say anything about Komatsu. Everyone likes Komatsu.

But look at these relationships compared to each other. What do they have in common?

Though they may not be the smoothest of relationships, they are at least decently trusting in nature. These are people that Coco knows he can trust.

Recall again, that Coco has had his trust in the IGO shattered by his past.

So, back to Anon’s question

How is Coco’s relationship to Ichiryuu/the other Kings presented?

Okay, so I may have strayed off topic a bit. But, well, Anon asked for more rants/analyses.

So, what does all that have to do with how Coco's relationships with the rest of the family are presented?

Well... it technically has nothing to do with it. But hear me out:

In terms of just presentation, I could sum it up in a list:

Toriko: Coco and Toriko arguably have the best relationships out of the Kings. They not only are willing to work with the other, but they automatically work together. I'd say more, but then I'd just be restating what I said earlier

Sunny: Coco and Sunny get along well enough, but its shown that they're not on the best of terms. Their relationship is somewhat strained, and they're both prone to slighting the other. Nevertheless, they're on decent terms. (Again, not gonna restate everything)

Zebra: Coco is shown to strongly dislike Zebra, especially early on. Most notably, he refuses to go with Toriko to pick up Zebra from prison without a second thought. However, due to Coco's generally docile nature, they don't get into huge fights like Toriko and Sunny do with Zebra.

Ichiryuu: ...It's complicated. While (as I said before) Ichiryuu is shown to be a generally gentle and caring father, this post elaborates a bit more on some of what could be extrapolated from the facts that Ichiryuu runs the IGO, and that the IGO has done some pretty awful things to Coco.

But, well, that's kind of a gross oversimplification of what is understood through context and offhanded comments about the past.

Because, when everything's been accounted for, Coco trusts Toriko and Sunny. Not just in the way that "they'd probably save his life if they had to", because let's be real, Ichiryuu would do that. Rin would do that. Hell, Zebra would do that.

But Ichiryuu runs the IGO. He's the president of the entire organization. And as I've mentioned in the past, he's not stupid. Goofy? Yes, but not stupid. Ignorant? Well, sometimes seemingly so for comedic effect, but he’s never proven to miss important things when it matters most.

When his child is being subjected to literal human experimentation, he can't pretend he doesn't know. And if he's the PRESIDENT OF THE IGO, he can't pretend he doesn't have the power to stop it. He's letting this happen. He's complacent in letting Coco be experimented on — something that's clearly established to be traumatizing. In the second picture featured, Toriko directly says: "He's gone through a lot of bad times. Enough to quit being a Gourmet Hunter."

Sure, as a general rule, Coco is presented with having generally decent relationships with everyone else. But when it comes to how he truly feels about most of the other characters (especially when taken in the context of his past, which perfectly enough, is what Anon was asking for), its a general distrust in almost everyone. (Because he was betrayed by the IGO, of all organizations.)

Now, what I’m about to say is fairly off-topic, but then again, what in this WALL OF TEXT wasn’t?

One thing I’m sure many of us find to be at least somewhat irritating is when introversion is treated as a character flaw that has to be “fixed”. Its never quite sat right with me when I see an introvert be “fixed” into being an extrovert by the end of a story.

But strangely enough, they didn’t really do this with Coco.

Not because he stayed an introvert the whole series (though really, he did stay fairly reserved).

But, because the extreme lengths he was willing to go to in order to avoid other people? The things he did that went beyond introversion in order to stay away from people?

Those are things we see lessening over the course of the series. Sure, he may still live on a precipice in the woods, but after Cooking Fest, he invites Sunny and Zebra over.

Think about those with that scene towards the end of Puffer Whale in mind:

(Screenshot taken from Episode 6: The Knocking Master! Time to Taste the Puffer Whale!)

Again, I’m going to end this rant on an invitation for further speculation. I wonder if most of Coco’s character development is less about him overcoming his fears of his poison (or, if you want to get philosophical, his fear of himself), and more about overcoming the fear of himself he came to develop after a series of very traumatic experiences (being convinced by these scientists that he’s a “Dangerous Beast” that should be locked up), and gradually coming to be able to trust people again?

---

And of course, feel free to add to this in the notes! Or laugh at the sheer amount of time I’ve spent analysing this. Or yell at me for being too confusing and not just answering the question directly.

[karliesbuzzcut]

(100) Million Dollar Lawsuit

Intro | part1 | part2 | part3 | part4

We are on the last chapter (for now) and this the most chaotic one. Mainly because it doesn’t follow any kind of chronological order (or logical sense), it’s just Russ going in circles for literal years.

But I’ll try my best to condense it for you, so all you need to do is to keep your seat belt fastened until the aircraft stops completely.

Right after the failed Ari lawsuit, Russ goes back to his one and only love: Taylor Swift 💫 And he has learned a lesson — not a good lesson, mind you, but a lesson: small claims courts won’t take him anywhere. If he really wants to punish women for not complimenting his suit, he will have to file a multi-million dollar federal lawsuit.

But, since denying sex from The Russell isn’t illegal (yet), he had to come at it from a different angle. I’m going to give Russ a chance to explain himself first.

Before you ask: yes, the following was Russell’s response to a woman thanking Taylor for visiting an 8 year-old girl who was very badly burned in an accident.

As I’ve always said, it’s okay if you aren’t fluent in Bullshit. That’s what I’m here for.

You see, Russell views human interactions as a series of transactions: I make a tweet worth liking, you go on a date with me; I take you to Olive Garden, you give me a handie for free; I put on a suit, you hug me and smile; I write you a song and sue you, you produce said song. Whenever women don’t fulfil their side of the deal, he becomes enraged.

But the reason he has such a strong hate-boner for Tay, is because she seemed to also follow his same ‘moral code’. A kid makes a cute video, she visits them at the hospital. A fan writes her a letter inviting her to their wedding, she goes to the wedding. A couple of kids fold 1989 paper cranes for Andrea, Taylor invites them to one of her concerts.

Russ thought “this is a done deal”. He didn’t write that song for Taylor because he particular liked her; he just thought she’d be the most likely artist to produce it — or at least acknowledge his existence.

I mentioned before that Russ wrote a whole-ass book about this. And I think it’s as good a time as any to talk about it. For a short amount of time, Russell chilled out about the ✨100 million dollar lawsuit ✨ but my guess is that he thought his book would get him the same results as a lawsuit? To be fair, the book is fantastic. 5/5, would recommend. 

He details the harassment he went through after suing Taylor Swift (the first time). Apparently old ladies at coffee shops would scream at him because he dared to sue Our Queen. A Mexican even pointed a gun at him (it wasn’t me, guys! Just a fellow countryman ❤️) and ordered Russ to drop the lawsuit. Computers at his job caught on literal fire because he was sent very powerful viruses. His friend Ken — who definitely exists! — was hit with a Molotov cocktail. Yep. 2016 was definitely the year people were willing to murder for Taylor Swift.

There’s also this brilliant dream sequence that involves an owl with the voice of Morgan Freeman, and Taylor’s agents guarding a tower in which she’s being held captive. 

ALSO ALSO: an entire chapter is called “SHE CHOSE HIM OVER ME”. Taylor Swift chose Joe Alwyn — a man she actually knows — over a man she’s not even aware exists. Women, amiright?

I think Russell would enjoy the Kaylor community to a certain extent. Not the lesbian part, obviously: he doesn’t trust women who don’t want to touch his peen. I just mean the baseless hatred of Joe. Look, I made a little collage of his rants ❤️ tell me if any of this sounds familiar!

You know — I’ve been joking around a lot about Russell just wanting to do the nasty with Taylor. But you know me, I like joking around. In reality Russ only wants what is fair. He wants to put a stop to all these senseless acts of kindness perpetrated by Taylor ‘The Generous’ Swift.

This isn’t about him at all, actually. Shame on you for thinking there’s an ounce of greed in that selfless little body of his. HE’S DOING THIS TO PROTECT THE KIDS WITH CANCER!

There are no ulterior motives here! This isn’t about a date!

THIS IS NOT ABOUT A DATE AT ALL GUYS STOP SAYING THAT.

I think this is my favourite post of his, because– grammatically speaking –he doesn’t specify which of them is wearing the red dress. And that sends me every goddamn time.

Anyway. The book, as magnificent as it was, got him absolutely nowhere. I know, I can’t believe it either. So he went back to focus on his lawsuit. But apparently not enough, because he didn’t serve her properly..? Now, don’t expect me to understand this, because I am very stupid (so it’s quite a good thing that I haven’t sued anybody for millions of dollars) but something about him sending the lawsuit to her old legal team..? And then trying to force UPS to serve her? I think he even said he was going to serve her in the middle of one of her concerts... but I’m guessing that didn’t go as planned 🤷‍♀️ oops.

Of course, Russie wouldn’t allow such an anticlimactic ending. Can you guess what he did? Please tell me that you can guess what he did. HE MADE ANOTHER SONG 😭❤️

This one is called ‘I Don’t Get You, Taylor Swift’. Another masterpiece that we definitely didn’t deserve 🙌

This was around April, 2019. By then I was being lured away by Kaylors, so I broke it off with Russ. I know that he filed a 3rd lawsuit against Taylor last year, which is just like the second one but hopefully this time he’ll be able to serve. And listen— I know that sounds like an awful thing to wish on Taylor, but I’d rather have Russell occupied suing a rich woman (who isn’t even going to deal with him), than a poor sex worker in Nevada. I bet TayTay would prefer that too.

Well guys, I’ve mentioned this a few times already, but I really had to be selective with the amount of information I was going to throw at you. I’ve avoided some of the shittier stuff he said or did, because I wanted to keep these posts as lighthearted as possible. I also didn’t touch on many things because they would just derail us. Like for example: one of the few lawsuits he has filed against someone who isn’t a woman, was against the state of Utah. I know, right? He’s trying to singlehandedly legalise prostitution in Utah, and even wrote a book (more like a pamphlet) brilliantly titled ‘Why I'm Making It Legal for Your 18 Year Old Daughter to Get In Bed with a Complete Stranger for Only 500 Bucks: A Short Essay from a Pro Se Litigant who is Challenging the Utah Brothel Bans’.

I copy-pasted that title guys, I swear to god.

The book is very graphic. This one I certainly do not recommend as I still suffer nightmares because of it.

Soren is a character who also had to be cut out — which is a shame because he really tried to be a good christian and help Russell. Not as in “I support you, Russell” but as in “why don’t you take a nap, Russell”. Turns out, even cinnamon rolls have a limit. Russ, of course, blames Taylor Swift for the fact that he’s losing his friends. I’m not joking — it’s an article in his lawsuit:

Greer has lost family relationships, friend connections and business connections because of the trauma of Taylor Swift. His family tells him to "get over it," resulting in shouting matches and strained relationships. Greer's friends get annoyed by his focusing on the trauma of it, when nobody knows the pain of getting rejected by a public figure — twice — and the fallout that has resulted from it.

Russell embodies that comic/meme of the little guy who puts a stick in his bicycle’s wheels and then blames Taylor Swift when he inevitably falls.

Sooooo...

Maybe someday I’ll write a post about Russ’ latest antics. I know he still posts stupid stuff on Facebook, which he later deletes. He shined especially bright at the peak of the BLM movement. He also plead guilty to electronic communications harassment— did you see that conviction coming? Yes, yes you did 😌

Regarding Taylor, I read that Russ knew someone who knew Todrick Hall — and Russ sent him a song and video for Taylor. All he got back was a Cease and Desist letter. But I’d have to do a bit of digging to get the details. I was already so overwhelmed with organising the information I was previously aware of, that I decided to leave the newer stuff for another time. You know, once I’ve had some time to inform myself... as well as a really long shower.

Since I left so much shit out, I’ll be taking questions if you have any. And if you can muster the courage to ask them. I’m weirdly proud of being some kind of Russell encyclopaedia. I might not have much going for me...

There’s no ‘but’ — that was the complete statement.

Before I go, I wanted to add this screenshot. I absolutely love it because it summarises ✨The Russell Experience✨. Russ wants Taylor to know pain, poverty and punishment. But when asked “why?” his answer is just “oh, I was ignored lol”

*none of the screenshots are mine