#i love Kyles stupid little outfit

[ballroomfitz]

Silly Little Queers In Their Silly Little Outfits

[pineappleciders]

I loved your older siblings has, can u do more of them ?? :3

south park main 4 with a stereotypical older sibling reader

A/N: of course!!!! i've actually gotten several reqs to do more of these so i'm gonna do the main 4!!! i hope this is what you meant :D also so sorry for this being super late i have too many drafts

stan marsh

ANOTHER SHELLY??? pray for him

his friends have seriously been getting annoyed with how much he complains about his older siblings

you don't beat him up as bad as shelly does but you do shove him out of the way and noogie him and all that. you take his hat off and make fun of his greasy hair and he gets super pissy

always angry about how you always manage to woo your parents over. how sharon treats you like an angel when you're actually an evil dick

you and shelly gang up on him all the time LOL you two plan together in your rooms about how to annoy him. like when his friends are over you constantly open the door randomly just to put him on edge

whenever he's having problems with wendy he always comes to you. you always laugh and make fun of him but you actually give really good relationship advice

despite constantly making fun of him and annoying him you actually always have his back?? when he's getting bullied or he feels scared you're always on the person's ass and ready to jump in front of him at any moment

you'd never admit it though. stan is a little shit but he's a funny evil little shit

kyle broflovski

he peeks into a room to see you playing with ike and smiling and laughing and treating him like a little angel and he compares that to how you treat him and he thinks it's unfair

what he doesn't know is that when he was a baby like ike you were constantly cooing at him and carrying him. you think you would die of embarrassment if your parents showed him pictures of you reading him bedtime stories

he thinks you HATE him. like he is 100% convinced that you are out to get him. i mean you kinda are but it's tough love yk

you hide his hat often because you know he would rather die than go to school without it. he gets all pissed and snatches it when he finds it

calls you stupid and stuff like stereotypical sibling behavior but you're really the only grown-up he can trust with issues. sheila is amazing but she has quite a temper,, you're not that great either but you always help out somehow

tattles on you when you do smth he knows ur not supposed to be. he doesn't take immense joy in being a snitch but he thinks you deserve it

eric cartman

he hates you. you're #1 on his shit-list. like seriously be careful

whines and stamps his foot when you aren't a pushover and actually make him do basic things. like how dare you be a normal human being. he hates liane too but he always clings to her when you're around

whenever you see his friends you like to embarrass him by telling them how much of a mama's boy he is. and it doesn't really work because their opinion of him can't get much lower

is constantly plotting on how to get rid of you. sometimes you find papers in his room that are either extremely complicated or super simple plans to kill you

he also tapes threatening letters to your door sometimes. you're not really scared of him, but after the incident with the tenormans, you started locking your door at night..

his friends are actually quite thankful that there's someone to keep eric in his place now. he actually acts... somewhat more normal now. it's frightening how just having an older sibling can keep him in line

although... not completely. he's still a little devil and you pick him up by his scruff like a kitten whenever you catch him plotting.

kenny mccormick

even if you occasionally lock the door on him, and tease him in his stupid little roleplay outfits, he's still quite thankful to have an elder figure in his life who can take care of him.

admittedly, it's very hard to be mean to kenny and karen, so you typically find yourself bullying kevin the most.

it's never mean-spirited though. living in a household like that requires you to stick together, and you honestly wouldn't trade your siblings for the world

you get a job pretty early to start providing for your family, and you're often forced to bring kenny and the others with you to work at your boring cashier job. kevin likes to help out with restocking while karen and kenny play dolls behind the register

you smack kenny upside the head everytime you catch him reading porno mags.

his friends either think you're awesome or think you're lame. depends on how u act and cartman probably lowkey likes you but doesn't admit it cuz ur poor😭😭

even though you're mean to him u and kenny still chill a lot together. he'll always ask about adult stuff like weed but you never entertain his goofy ideas. he might try to act more grown, but he'll always be your baby brother!!!

[mossygirl333]

MossyGirls 2024 Kinkmas Masterlist

I decided to do something festive for the holidays and got this wonderful idea from @gloomwitchwrites, seriously go check them out they're Amazing! (with a capital A of course)

These are 12 prompts leading up to Christmas day, enjoy!

(Tw for smut!!)

Day 1 (12/13)

Lumberjack!Logan 'Wolverine' Howlette x f!reader

synopsis: You were driving to your cabin in the mountains when your stupid car broke down. Frustrated ,confused, and more than cold you hauled ass to the nearest cabin to help. A rough lumberjack met you, but he'd help you with your car...oh? You can't fix it and will have to order parts? I can stay in your home for the time being? What do you mean you don't have a guest room?! Can you blame him? He hasn't seen a pretty thing like you in ages.

Link

Day 2 (12/14)

John Price x assistant!reader

synopsis: Price had no one to celebrate Christmas with, his ex-wife got the kids this year. It was lonely in the house, coping with beer and a good cigar. But when a sweet little lass like you comes to his doorstep with cookies and a present, he has to let you in! And reward you of course, you were always such an attentive assistant, now it's his turn to be attentive.

Link

Day 3 (12/15)

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x gf!reader

Synopsis: Simon never really liked Christmas until he met you, a practically walking Hallmark movie. Dragging him along to a Christmas party that your friend was hosting, 'You need to get out more! meet some new friends!', was your reasoning. With the eggnog spiced and definitely spiked, he couldn't get that stupid little skimpy Santa outfit out of his head. Good thing they had a bathroom upstairs. But shh, stay quiet, Don't want anyone to know Mr. and Mrs. Claus are up to no good.

Day 4 (12/16

Johnny 'Soap' Mactavish x f!reader

Synopsis: Christmas was always a time for spending time with family and joking around. But you and Johnny just had each other this year. Which was enough for you but...not exactly enough for him. And he's working real hard to have a chubby baby next year.

Day 5 (12/17)

König x fiance!reader

Synopsis: You were new to German culture. Growing up in America, you were more into Santa and his little elves than the Krampus festival Konig took you too. It felt more like Halloween than Christmas. With an off hand comment, calling Krampus 'hot' you had unknowingly wormed an idea into your lovers head. He's Krampus. And you're his victim. Run as fast as you can. He catches you. He fucks you.

Day 6 (12/18)

Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick x fiance!reader

Synopsis: Kyle and you are both avid Christmas enjoyers, even as children. Movie Nights, Christmas Dinner, The Parade, even Mariah Carey wormed her way into your heart the second the first snow came. Now you sat in the kitchen, making and decorating cookies. But those cookies aren't the only thing getting glazed tonight.

Day 7 (12/19)

John Price x babysitter!reader

Synopsis: John and his wife have been tense. Holidays ruined with their screaming fights and her physical violence. But things got a whole lot worse when he found out about her affair. Now he has to get back at her for her shit treatment and who else to do it with than the woman that his kids love, and his wife hates? His babysitter.

Day 8 (12/20)

Logan 'Wolverine' Howlette x f!reader

Synopsis: Logan was always a bit antsy when snow came. And you never truly understood why, maybe it was some sort of trauma related to holiday seasons. Chalking it up to that, you decided to make this Christmas the best Christmas he could get. When he avoided you, you ramped it up, desperate to get his attention (and maybe his affection) But you silly little thing. Rut was starting soon and you just locked yourself in his room.

Day 9 (12/21)

Johnny 'Soap' Mactavish x ex!reader

Synopsis: Your friend invited you to a Christmas party. You went. Saw your ex. And immediately wanted to leave. But you couldn't. Not when you remembered that stupid laugh and the way he'd call you 'Bonnie' in that stupid Scottish accent. You drank the entire time to cope and ended up sloppily making out with some hot dude. Johnny didn't like it. He took you home, he didn't mean to follow you into your house. And he didn't mean to tuck you in. And he didn't mean to start getting handsy. But how could he not when all he remembered were how sweet your sighs were and how warm your walls were around his cock?

Day 10 (12/22)

Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick x college!sweetheart!reader

Synopsis: He was home. He was finally home. Warm, that's all you felt. You had so much anxiety that he was still going to be deployed during Christmas, but he wasn't. And that meant everything to you. It was the only gift you wanted, but Kyle obviously bought you some before he left. After the hot cocoa mugs were put away, and the warmth of the fire lulled you into relaxation, he finally treated you to the best present. Him and you, in love. (and making love)

Day 11 (12/23)

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x virgin!reader

Synopsis: Simon was a gentle man. He never was overbearing or mean. Let you take the lead often. He was soft-spoken, hands practically trembling every time he held you like you would break. You begged him all year to take your virginity. You weren’t a baby and you sure as hell weren’t fragile. You could take him! Well Christmas came early this year, and his present to you- was him.

Day 12 (12/24)

Virgin!loserKonig x friend!reader

König comes from a big family. Youngest out of all of them and when it comes to be the youngest, you’re the easiest to get picked on. With his awkward demeanor and socially conservative personality, he didn’t have a girlfriend this year to take home. he was embarrassed, but you wanted to help him out. He was such a good friend anyway- and you had no where else to be on Christmas Eve. little did you know, being König’s ‘girlfriend’ was gonna get a lot more physical.

[ficmashup]

A Date

Summary: You join TF141 after something happened on your last deployment. They take you in and while it takes some time, you find yourself warming up to them, and them to you. Perhaps especially to the Captain.

A/N: These two are such idiots, I love them. I'm already feeling the itch to make this ten parts and I'm trying to resist (not really) so we'll see! I know what I want to happen next, but we'll see how many chapters it takes to get there. Hope you enjoy!

Warnings: Some SA references if you squint, crass language.

Word Count: 3.1k

Feral Masterlist

My foot taps insistently on the floor as I stare at my reflection in the mirror. I’ve changed clothes five times and while each outfit has irritated me in some way, nothing makes me more frustrated than the fact that I’ve changed clothes five times. It’s so unlike me. But there’s no protocol for going on a date with your captain. There’s fucking protocol to not date your captain. “Stupid, stupid, stupid.” I take a deep breath, my gaze dropping to my phone for the dozenth time.

It’s been a couple days since Price stayed here and since we set a date to go out. Like actually go out.

The only people I can call are the people I absolutely do not want to know about this. Simon would either pretend not to care then tail us from my apartment or show up randomly wanting to meet my date. Soap would tease the hell out of me and keep bothering me until I told him who it is so he could do a background check. Gaz…he’s the wildcard. And it’s for that reason alone that I pick up the phone and call him.

The phone rings as I put it on speaker and set it on the dresser in front of me as I stare at the screen. “G? Hey!” His voice comes over and I smile a little at the instant warmth in his tone. The tapping of my foot slows.

“Gaz.” I greet him, then realize I have no clue what I’d like to say. “What are you doing?”

“I’m in the shops getting a few things for this weekend. You’re going to fucking love the dip I’m bringing.” I hear the soft shuffling of bags and more of my nerves ebb at his easygoing tone. We’re all gathering at Price’s to watch the game before we’re heading back to base this weekend. “You’re bringing something too, yeah?”

“You know I’m bringing dessert and I don’t want to hear a fucking word about it.” I bite and smile when I hear him chuckling.

“Thought your idea of dessert was sucking on a spoon of sugar, G. You know the whole point of watching the game is to eat chips and dip in front of a big tv, yeah? We don’t need dessert.”

“You need something sweet to cut the salt all of you are inhaling every second.”

“It’s a dip party.”

“It’s a football party and I’m making a dip.”

“A dessert dip? The fuck is it, a bowl of whipped cream?”

“I’ve seen you and Johnny race to finish containers of whipped cream, so don’t even try pretending you wouldn’t love that.” I’m grinning now and while a ball of nerves still remains heavy in my stomach, I no longer feel weighed down by it.

Gaz grunts over the phone. “Ugh, right. Nearly threw up after that.”

“Mmhmm.” I remember clearly, for some reason, I was suckered into rubbing both Gaz and Soap’s backs while they tried not to puke. “If you don’t want to try what I bring, then you don’t have to.” There’s a beat.

“No, I’ll try it.” He gives in almost instantly and I smirk while I walk into my kitchen, leaning against the counter while I stare at the door. A glance at the clock reveals that it’s nearly time and if there’s anything I can count on, it’s that John will be on schedule. “But did you need something, G? Or have you just missed my sweet voice?” Gaz asks and I hear some plastic crinkling as he no doubt piles chips into his shopping cart.

My lips press together for a moment as I consider what to say. “Just missed your voice, Kyle. Looking forward to trying whatever monstrosity of a dip you end up bringing.”

“Hm, careful, G. All those sweets are starting to rub off on you. That was almost sweet.”

“Fuck off.”

“Yeah, that’s more like it.”

“Bye, Gaz.”

“Later, G.”

I hang up and take a deep breath, feeling steady again before there’s a knock at the door. The zing of nerves flushes through my body and I don’t let myself think about it as I walk over and swing the door open without hesitation. My body instantly softens at the sight of Price in a white button down, pressed slacks, and a bouquet of roses. I’m struck dumb instantly.

My name falls off his lips, sweet as honey, and the way he looks me up and down makes me grateful that I finally chose a black dress. “You’re stunning.” He says it like a fact and I smile, pressing my lips together to keep from grinning like a fool as I welcome him inside. I definitely don’t let my eyes slide over his broad back and see how his pants fit his backside and thighs very nicely. “Wasn’t sure how you felt about flowers, so I figured I’d hedge my bets.” He places the beautiful bouquet on my kitchen counter while I grab a vase and I smile as I turn around to see him placing a small bag of my favored hard candies beside them.

“And you say that you’re not good at diplomacy.” I tease and earn a chuckle while I fill a vase with water.

“Don’t think many would accept flowers and candy in exchange for weapons or tac gear.” He lifts the bouquet and slides the already cut stems into the vase as I set it on the counter next to him.

“You never know. Something to try.” I smirk up at him while he smirks down at me and fuck, it’s been a long time since I’ve so easily had fun with someone. “You look really good.” I say it before I can think too hard about it and luckily, my head is blissfully quiet as his smile sweetens while those pretty blue eyes shine.

“Good thing too. Maybe I won’t look too outta place next to you.” He says and I blink before I lift my hand to flutter over my mouth to hide my wide smile. Fucking smooth talker. “Ready?” Price tilts his head towards the door and I nod, grabbing my small purse and sliding a few candies into it. He offers his arm and I take it with a little smile, feeling…well, like I’m going on an actual date.

The car ride is easy, nothing we haven’t done before, but the nerves creep back as we walk into a nice restaurant. Although it’s terribly sweet how John shifts and his hand slides over mine wrapped around his arm when he confirms the reservation. Maybe he’s as nervous as I am. “Is this your usual haunt for dates?” I ask him softly as we settle down at a table. Thankfully, it has a clear view of the doors.

John heaves a breath and shakes his head. “No. Thought that since we’re both a bit out of practice, going back to basics might be best.” He settles into his chair and there’s a small smile on my face as he looks around a bit, hands smoothing over his thighs. Somehow, him being nervous makes me less nervous. It means he cares as much as I do.

“Bet I can beat you there.” I challenge and he stills, quirking an eyebrow at me. “Two years. And a little longer if we’re talking a date with someone that matters.”

John half-smiles. “A year for me. Year and a half for anyone that mattered.” I hum, claiming my victory while his eyes sparkle with amusement just as the waiter comes by to take our drink orders. I take a small risk just to put him a little more at ease.

“An old-fashioned for him.” I order his favorite with a little smirk at the look he gives me.

He considers a moment while the waiter looks between us with a dubious expression. “Mojito to start, then white wine for dinner. Something sweet.” Price looks at me for approval and I nod, pressing my lips together to keep myself from grinning like a fool. The waiter takes this in and his bemused glance at us nearly makes me laugh as he walks away.

“Think we’re scaring the waiter.” My tone is light as my fingers glide over the silverware laid out on the table with the cloth napkin in my lap. At least I remembered a little about how to act in a place like this.

“He’ll recover.” John says without an ounce of concern and I try not to glow under his steady gaze. It feels surprisingly nice having all of his attention. I don’t mind being seen by him, never have.

My head tilts a little. “Do you enjoy scaring the general public?”

“Occasionally.” He leans forward a little and I copy him, unable to resist. “Although, I’m not the one who nearly knocked out some idiot in a bar.”

I smile at the memory. “He would have deserved it.”

Price nods without hesitation. “I almost regret not letting you. That happen often when you’re home?”

My head shakes as I fiddle with my glass of water, turning it in a slow circle. “I handle things a little differently here. My reaction there was due to being around a crowd of other military men who seem to always understand physical denials better than verbal. Something I’m sure you’re not unfamiliar with.” He sighs, but nods with reluctant acceptance. “I figured it was better to make my stance clear right away. At home, I’m a bit more lenient. More drinks thrown in people’s faces than fists.” The pads of my fingers tap against my glass as a thought occurs to me. “What’s your choice of deterrent?”

My question earns me a warm chuckle and brings the slightest of blushes to his cheeks. “Ah…most are chased off by a stern warning.” My smile widens a bit when he doesn’t deny being chased after. It’s not a surprise. In my clearly biased opinion, Price is a catch. Which makes it all the more puzzling that he’s on a date with me.

We order and conversation is easy as always. We veer away from the topic of work and speak more about our family life, what it was like for us growing up, and how we eventually decided to go into the military. It’s nice hearing him talk about himself for an extended period of time. I’m used to hearing him talk about plans, missions, and all with a firm tone with a goal in mind. Now, he’s relaxed and smiling and his tone is light. Even playful. I could listen to him talk all day.

“I don’t need dessert, John.” I insist, smiling ear to ear as he hands the dessert menu back to our waiter after already ordering me one. “I’m not going to eat it.”

“You’ll have at least one bite here, then eat it tomorrow.” He states and my head shakes while I swirl my wine around in my glass. It’s actually good. He chose well.

“Only if you have a bite too. You need more sugar in your life.” I say pointedly with laughter in my voice. His smile in return is warm and both of us have our elbows on the table as we lean towards each other.

“Good thing I have you then, sugar.” His eyes sparkle as my head ducks a moment, my face heating.

“Mm, good thing.” I return and fuck, he’s pretty when he smiles like that. All teasing and light and sweet. The dessert comes, the sweetest little thing they had on the menu, and we both take a bite as promised. I might have a few bites more before we finally walk out. The night is brisk and I pull my wrap tight around my shoulders, automatically leaning into Price’s warmth as I wrap my arm around his. He accepts me instantly and it’s easy to feel like a normal couple as we walk down the street towards his car.

“Should we think about what to tell the team or are we putting a pin in that for now?” I ask idly and Price sighs, the warm air from his lungs appearing as an amorphous shape in the cool air.

“As soon as we tell them, we’re going to hear about it for a while.”

“Weeks?”

“Months, if we’re lucky. Years, if we’re unlucky.”

I pull in a deep breath, shaking my head at the thought of the boys nagging us for so long. But it does make me happy to think about years spent with them and Price. “How about we talk about it over breakfast on Friday?” I suggest, my lips pressing together a moment as nerves swirl in my stomach. I can count on one hand the number of times that I’ve asked a man out with varied success. But when I look back at Price, he just has a sweet smile on his face.

“Sounds good to me. Dinner tonight, lunch tomorrow, breakfast on Friday.” We reach the car and I raise a brow at him as he opens the passenger side door for me.

“Lunch tomorrow?” We hadn’t spoken about that yet.

He nods, a teasing glint in his eyes as he helps me up into the passenger seat. “Mmhmm. Sound good?” Good is a severe understatement, but I manage not to grin like an idiot while I nod.

“Sounds good.” I agree and that little glint grows brighter as he closes the door. I allow myself to lean my head back against the headrest as I smile as wide as I want, then compose myself as Price gets into the driver’s seat and takes me home. We both walk very slowly as we head up to my flat and I almost laugh at both of us acting like teenagers not wanting to say goodbye at the end of a date.

He sighs heavily as I unlock the door and I smirk at the sound. At least I don’t have to wonder if he had a good time. I push my door open and turn back around, leaning against the door frame. “Thank you for this.” My hands smooth down my dress as I look up at his handsome face and I’m glad he’s not wearing his usual hat pulled low over his face. I like that I get to see this side of him. “I had a really good time.”

“So did I. Thank you for letting me.” He says with a playful edge in his voice and I give him a look for the insinuation that I don’t often let anyone do anything for me. Despite it being absolutely true.

“And are you going to tell me where I’m letting you take me for lunch tomorrow?” I turn his words around on him and feel immense satisfaction as he smirks and leans against the doorframe opposite me.

“I’m going to show you a few of my favorite places around the city. It’ll be a bit more relaxed and we’ll be walking a bit, so comfortable shoes would be wise. I’ll come to pick you up at noon. Alright?” He tilts his head towards me slightly, waiting for me to agree, and I smile at his thoughtfulness as I nod.

“Alright.” I agree and we stall for another moment. We’ve reached a soft line tonight. Sure, he’s been in my apartment, ate my food, drank tea, slept in my guest room, but that was all while we were friends. He’s not getting invited inside after the first date. I cross my arms and he seems to realize the line a second afterward, smiling as he straightens and takes half a step away from my door.

“I…” He hesitates and my arms fall back to my sides as I wait for whatever he has to say. His pretty blue eyes are locked on mine with his lips parted and I raise a brow, silently telling him to go on. He takes a breath and turns his body back towards mine, but doesn’t move closer. “I’d like to kiss you, but I need you to tell me if that’s alright or not.” His voice is a touch lower and surprise trickles through me, then warmth.

I take a steadying breath before stepping towards him. “It’s okay. Just…slowly.” My eyes stay on his, my words frank and honest, just like we’ve always been with each other. He nods and leans down a bit, the only part of him touching me is a callused finger sliding under my chin to tilt my head for him. The barest touch sends electricity sparking through me.

I taste his breath first and the leftover sweetness from our last bite of dessert mixes with distinct, bitter scent of his cigars. It’s intoxicating and I hum ever so softly while my eyelids flutter. John murmurs my name before brushing his lips against mine for the first time. I stiffen out of instinct and he pulls back an inch before freezing, his eyes scanning my face. It takes a moment for me to relax and this time, I reach up and gingerly slide my hands through his beard as I get myself used to him. He sighs and I’m immediately comforted by the way he leans into my touch.

“Again.” I request, lightly scratching my dull nails over his beard without even thinking about it.

Price’s eyes widen for a moment, but he doesn’t hesitate to kiss me again. I focus on everything that makes Price, Price—the smell of his cigars, his trimmed beard, the way I can feel the tension in his hand as he tilts my chin up, doing everything he can not to touch me more because I haven’t asked for it yet, haven’t said it was okay. His lips are gentle against mine and the kiss is simple. Just a little pressure and the slightest taste of his breath once, twice, a third time before he pulls back and straightens.

Our hands fall away from one another and I rub my fingers together, still feeling the sensation of his beard under my fingertips. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” He says in a low tone that I’ve never heard from him before and all I can do is nod. He smiles and I barely stop myself from reaching for him again as he walks down the hall and into the stairwell.

It’s only when I’m inside my apartment and leaning back against my locked door, fingers on my lips as they tingle, that I realize just how much trouble I’m in.

Taglist (I love all of you sm! <3 If anyone else wants to be tagged, lmk!)

@under-the-dirt @jj-ara33 @sorchateas @cherry-blosom-tree

@thriving-n-jiving @jinxxangel13 @emsstuff1 @missmidnight-writes @thereeallink @younggirlgenius @1wh4re1nova

[cxhleel108]

LITG S8 Thots for this week: How eventful…

• Sienna don’t be mad cuz you decided to spread them legs for Jin and people found out. Be sneakier next time💁🏽‍♀️

• Outfit time!

• This a little too prom for me no shade.

• Gorgeous! Stunning! Magnificent!

• Not Oakley just wanted to check on us. The rest of you boys gon have to step your game up Idk what else to say atp.

• Jin kinda evil omggg why he lie to them bitches for no reason???

• OH NO HE DID KISS SIENNA NOW WE CAN NEVER BE TOGETHER😱😱😱😱😱

• Yeah you are high on my list Liam…my hit list.

• Wait she’s cutesyyyyy!

• Hazel real lucky I like her cuz I coulda just aired her tea out just now.

• Exactly! So glad you get it now😁

• Here Theo go admitting he has a crush on me yet again…are we still supposed to gag at this?

• And I’m annoyed because of the both of you so how about you either grow up or break up!

• GUYS PLEASE STOP MAKING SHAWN PINE AFTER ME ITS ILLOGICAL AND ITS BECOMING VERY AGGRAVATING!

• Our clip was actually so meaningless help.

• Liam unless you want me, me, me to get Oakley to break you, you, you in half I suggest you shut it!

• Why do y’all want me to help you pick who to get with??? Why???

• FINALLY MY SUFFERING ENDS!!!

• Wow every couple here really sucks except us LMAOOOO.

• I love Bea but I really cannot feel bad for her when she complains about Liam. Girl you brought that sorry ass nigga in here like what😭😭😭 Kyle was right there.

• Aww chin up Sie-monster! I’m sure one of the demons in Hell are ready and willing to give you the love and devotion you need😊

• Outfit time!

• This the first sleepwear we’ve gotten that ain’t just a lace bra and coochie cutter thong I’m cryinggg.

• Ain’t no way Liam just creamed all over me and Oakley…sorry my intrusive thoughts made me type that😭😭😭

• You telling me this bitch heard the shower running, obviously indicating someone was in here, and then just decided to walk in…ok.

• Girl why she mad when she the one that walked in on me and my nigga fucking😭

• Hazel…not Liam…no girl you better than this!

• Claudia and Hazel look so damn good in their heart-rate challenge outfits my gawd! Thick thighs DO save lives😩😩😩

• Outfit time!

• Wish I could BEEEEEEEEEEEEE…part of your woooooorrrlllddd!

• Yeah this clears the mermaid fit I’m sorry.

• Hari had to watch Hazel give all her attention to Liam of all people ooouuu I know he wanna kill himself now.

• Damn not only is she not pretty but she also stupid, bless her heart.

• Jin’s football outfit made my 🐱 jump a lil bit jrkslashdhdkd sorry.

• I just busted out laughing.

• Exactly what I asked for😈

• I’m so glad we got to redo our dance cuz we ain’t get freaky like I wanted the first time.

• He mid as hell I’m sorry likekfjfjsksmak. This the best y’all could come up with for the last bombshell?

• Liam at this point just start fucking the boys sis cuz this the 3rd time you done did some sus shit.

• Oh lord I’m so tired of these anticlimactic ass cliffhangers. We already know ain’t no other bitch in here raised our partner’s heartbeat but us, stop playing!

[pinkrifle]

i know i’m a scream blog or whateva but i am. fixated on south park rn it is my spinterest and i love it sooo take being kyle’s older sista :3

lemonade luh luh lemonade,,,

tw’s: none !! :D but if you don’t like cussing don’t read thi

literally ike and kyle’s big sister, like literally,, automatically you feel like it is your duty to protect them!!

and that is exactly what you do <3

when kyle and his friends are doing random shenanigans you always call him occasionally just to make sure he’s not dead in a ditch—

and when kyle calls YOU randomly you pick up and your covered in superhero stickers, playing with random marvel action figures with ike. (team stan/main 4 always laugh at you :3 )

as a child, when kyle was a babey (let’s say uhh your 2 years older than him, so your 3 and he’s 1 🗣️) you always joked around with him and your biggest inside joke was owning a pig. when ike was adopted you guys shared the joke with him!!

whenever your around cartman never dares say anything about you and kyle’s religion,,

because time you beat cartmans ass, you didn’t care how big the age gap was and how wrong a big kid beating up a little kid was you would nawt stand for you and your brother being bullied 🗣️🗣️

whenever kyle and his friends have a bad day at school, or just one of them, you always make your next babysitting job with them fun!! watching comedy movies (that you should not make those kids watch 😙..), eating shit ton of icecream and prank calling people!!

whenever sheila gets upset and kyle and ike for doing the most outrageous antics ever you always attempt to distract her

and if your doing those stupid antics wiyj kyle and ike your always the person to lock her somewhere or prevent her from doing crazy shit to yall

the main 4 always battles to see which one you like more, you love all those little goofy babies equally!! but they still fight

in that metrosexual ep, you definitely participated in the wacky outfits, even helping the other 3 transform kyle !!

if you ever got a boyfriend or girlfriend kyle would be a little suspicious of the person but if it makes his sister happy he’s okay with it!!

y’all definitely cook jewish dishes together, it’s usually you doing most of the work but kyle loves helping you!!

doing goofy ass poses infront of the menorah and posting it on insta 100%

sometimes you join the boys in doing crazy shit and your always the mastermind 🫶 you always excuse their behavior in public by saying your their guardian and will stop them if they go too far (you don’t)

well thas it! requests are open 24/7 if anyone is interested, and if i made any mistakes in interpreting the main 4 boys let me know so i can fix it 🫶 if you see any grammar mistakes also lmk!!

[gyllenhaalstories]

presumed innocent episode 4 word vomit <3

protective rusty is so hot omg he's so protective omg 🥺

mya and raymond agreeing rusty shouldn't be a witness like so true this man is too stupid you gotta save yourselves there

barbara you are so beautiful you are so pretty you are so amazing i love you the only thing you'd have to forgive me for is because i'd tell you i love you so many times you would be sick of it but i love you barbara

everyone doing things for carolyn poor rusty. no one likes him. :(

the outfits in this!!! the t-shirt and sweatpants! the sweater by the end! the way he looked a little wet from the rain! oh my god rusty you look absolutely delicious 🥹

i guess it's time to sell the house and end your pool membership because kyle and jaden will need lifelong therapy!!! dr rush dropping rusty but keeping barbara is so real of her.

i love you rozat <3

THE BARBARA AND RUSTY SEX SCENE??? 😵‍💫 B FUCKING RUSTY SO SHE HOLDS BACK FROM FUCKING THE BARTENDER? oh that was a power move. oh god. the scene was so hot but her face afterwards IT HURTS..... here i was, thinking (and being scared) that we'd get a scene of rusty using barbara for sex because he misses his mistress too much. THE TABLES HAVE TURNED.

speaking of missing his mistress, when his mind plays tricks and gives him alternate versions of the day of her murder. when she's on the floor and he's whining "miss you so much". fuck. i cried. rusty no 😭

the way he's all smiley again when they hang out by the pool. oh rusty. oh you dumb dumb dumb man. he thinks things are better. aww 😔

THIS SCENE JUST SHOWS THAT IF RUSTY HAD THOUGHT WITH HIS BRAIN INSTEAD OF HIS DICK FOR ONE SECOND AND ASKED HIS WIFE TO FUCK A LITTLE HARDER ALL OF THIS WOULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED but nooooo rusty you are so dumb

"i can see that someone's been directed not to speak" RAYMOND IS SO SASSY. he's so important to this show, i love his little sarcastic remarks. i also love that he seems like the only sane person around here AND HE'S NOT EVEN SANE AT ALL TO TAKE ON RUSTY'S DOOMED CASE. please don't die of a heart attack raymond. i love you raymond. be my grandpa raymond.

the escape hatch words again. lorraine first using it, then raymond... oh the hogans are iconic.

i hate nico i hate everyone i hate this i hate everything.

okay fine i'm still not over the sex scene!!! rusty's little smile aww he's hit with post nut giggles 🥹

THE DNA? WHY? HOW? rusty you are so doomed. go refill your glasses prescription now so you can see the ceiling of your jail cell in 4D. that's all you will see until the day you die.

THE FUCKING END????? THE FUCKING END? THAT RATZER GUY, RUSTY YOU ARE SO FUCKING STUPID YOU ARE THE MOST STUPID MAN EVER OH MY GOD NO OH MY GOD WHY DID IT END LIKE THAT NO NO who is ratzer how did rusty know his wife's name. rusty almost said my name though teehee.

FUCK I LOVE THIS SHOW 😭

[sunsetfunset]

pls tell me ur thoughts on me headcanon I am starved for attention 🫡

Ahhhhh okay if you insist lol. I'm so obsessed with Cartman doing drag purely for self expression and FUN and I feel like he would straight up be serving Cunt™ like people would be begging him to step on them that don't even fuck with him usually.

I know for a fact Kenny McCormick would be having the fucking time of his life running around all oiled up in his fucking shiny short shorts. He has this bit all teed up where if someone goes, "Jesus Kenny aren't you freezing?!” he would whip out a little bottle of body oil from *god only knows where* and be like, "If you're so concerned you can warm me up *eyebrow waggles*"

Absolutely no one would take him up on this which is the point where Butters would step up in a stunning Janet costume!

(This look specifically!!!)

And *happily* volunteer! While I do love the idea of Butters as Columbia, I must confess that this energy

is like my favorite flavor of Bunny lol.

Also also if we look at both Columbia's energy and her soft spot for Eddie, I can't help but think Bebe and Clyde would be a cute fit for those two.

And last but not least my beloved style!! I deeply love the partners in crime sick of Cartman's shit vibe they would be emitting as riff raff and magenta. I feel like Stan would suggest it as a couples costume and Kyle would just hit him with a, "If you wanted me in a maid outfit you could have just asked." And genuinely no one would see these freaks all night they're just sneaking off to make out constantly before just dipping out early all together lol

Just to round out the crew, I'd love to submit Tolkien for Brad!! He's just such a great straight man, in all senses lol, and I feel he would be an excellent foil to the chaos of this group.

I would also like to submit an alternate group where Stan goes as Brad so that he can run around in tighty whities all shirtless with Kenny doing stupid shit like shoving snow in each other's barely there costumes.

I also have the secondary agenda of being obsessed with 🤓!Stan so that would truly be the cherry on top haha. I could totally see Wendy stepping up to serve besties who are over Cartman's shit vibes with Kyle!

Sorry I word vomited all this, but this was the perfect thing to hyperfocus on for Halloween so thanks for asking!!!

Happy Halloween y'all!!! And happy end of Southparktober!!

[desolateddreamur]

Following Your Advice

Kyle x Mute!Phone addict!reader

Story: (Phone Destroyer timeline) Kyle encourages you to take a break from your phone so you offer to have lunch together.

Gender neutral reader!

Requested? No!

TW: None! Literally so wholesome

Note: please like or reblog I spent four hours trying to figure out how to format the texting identical to Phone Destroyers on my phone through Ibis after I broke my fucking tablet, please I beg of you.

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Your phone rang softly, carrying the small jingle you used to associate with Kyle. In an instant you double-tapped the notification that was pulled down by the call. The game was far less important than calling or texting the Jewish boy you craved the love of. The one you'd do anything for.

You clicked accept on the FaceTime.

"Hey! Y/n, it's me. Listen!"

Beads of sweat- a result of the wild adventure he was just on, stuck to his forehead, causing stray strands of red curls to cling to his freckled skin. His eyes were frantically checking around for anyone listening and held an abundance concern. You cock your head to the side, giving a curt hum to tell him to talk.

While you did lack a voice, you were never jealous of his. It was far too beautiful to envy in your eyes.

"Don't you see what's going on here? You're being used!"

He gestures wildly with an empty gloved hand, making you want to be there to grab it and hold it in your own. Nonetheless, you encourage him to go on.

"Just... maybe you shouldn't be on your phone as much, you know?"

He pauses, thinking over some examples.

"Like, go have lunch with somebody, or..." Kyle rubs the nape of his neck, "Or I dunno, read a book."

He gave a sigh, finally jumping to the point and no longer beating around the bush. "Playing this stupid game is going to end up really bad for the..."

"Kyle, who are you talking to?" Cartman calls over from off camera, interrupting him.

Kyle inhaled sharply, "Nobody!" He yelled over, hanging up quickly.

You were left to process what had just gone down. You? Get a break from your phone? Your communicator?

You go open the green icon labeled as Message, clicking his profile. If anyone else asked you probably would've sent enough insults to fill a thesis to them. But it was Kyle; you just couldn't bring yourself to. He was the only one that bothered to learn sign language to talk to you.

Knowing he couldn't call back with Cartman there, you sent a text.

You sped to your closet and threw on some random cute outfit. Throwing on your shoes, you grabbed the letterman bag that held most of your items and shot out the front door. Excitement glimmered in your eyes as they kept watch of your phone screen.

Currently, you were looking over Pinterest on what you could make at his place for a cute indoor lunch date.

Placing your phone into your bag, you climb his front steps and quickly fix up your h/l hair from your run. When you knocked, some clambering was heard and you winced when something fell with a thick thud.

The door opened to show a frazzled Kyle, hat halfway on his head and a dopey grin on his face.

"C'mon on in, Y/n! I just setup the living room. I hope I didn't go too over the top?"

He steps aside and you walk in. With his living room right at the front door, you smiled widely. He had moved the coffee table to the side and set up a picnic blanket in front of the TV, a little assortment of electric candles on a flat board in the middle. The TV itself was playing some footage of a beach (Bonus being he had surround sound).

You set your bag down on the blanket and pulled Kyle into a tight hug by the hips. He tensed before setting his arms around your neck. Letting go and leaning back with his support, you began to sign to him.

'Did you really do all this for us?'

He let go as well and took your hand, guiding you to the kitchen as he spoke.

"Well.. Yeah. I mean- you're getting off your phone to spend time with me... And you never to that for anyone!"

He lets go and helps you gather up ingredients. When he turns to see if you signed a response, he froze. You were awfully close to his face with your own. A dreamy look hung in your half-lidded eyes before he got the memo and moved on his own.

One hand slipped behind your head and the other to your waist. Your own moved to loop around his neck as your chests press together, increasing your closeness.

You finally pushed forward the rest of the way, pressing him into a short kiss. You pulled away before he could kiss back and moved your hands to sign to him,

'You taste like peppermint'

His face flushed all the way to his ears and he laughed, "Well, you taste like watermelon! Can I... Can I have another?"

You deadpan, looking into his green eyes before pulling back into another kiss.

There was no lunch date after this happened. You both ended up ordered some takeout and spent the time kissing over and over in his kitchen.

[thebestkatayanagi]

What are your Kyle Headcanons?

// OOC IM SO GLAD SOMEONE ASKED

-Aroace

-he acts cold, but trust me he’s usually super energetic and easy to excite

-my brain keeps jumping back and forth between transgender and enby, so I’ve settled on an enby who transitioned

-lives to annoy the fuck out of ken

-he prefers blue, but sometimes he wears red to match ken

-he buys little outfits and accessories for 01 and the other robots (he has a clear favorite though…)

-he picked up instruments just so he could keep ken up at night, but turned out to be talented

-he’s constantly doing things that NOBODY would expect him to do, then doesn’t mention it again

-he doesn’t like shouting, and prefers to speak softer (even if a situation needs shouting)

-I’m a firm believer that he’d become friends with Matthew under he right circumstances

-he was a little shit as a teen, but mellowed out as an adult

-the only thing he can drive is a robot, DO NOT GIVE THIS MAN A CAR

-he wears reading glasses

-as a teen he wanted to dye his hair pink, but ultimately decided against it after using hair chalk

-kens usually the one who cuts his hair (im a firm believer that the Bowlcut kyle has in the future was ken “accidentally” messing his hair up)

-sometimes he genuinely suggests stupid shit as an actual solution to a problem, then immediately moves on like it was normal

-of the two, he gets the most migraines

-prefers winter over summer, but he loves the transition from summer to fall the most

I’m gonna cut off this post before it gets long enough to fill a book.

Tldr; i love Kyle and Ken

[thewarriorspecial]

Dress Up (CH2 - Different Light)

*Archive Edition* Previously only linked to AO3, full work now available under the cut.

Read on AO3

Rating: Explicit | Guy Gardner/Kyle Rayner, Hal Jordan, John Stewart

Additional Tags (All chapters listed): Established Relationship, hand wavy timeline, Lace Panties, Spanking, Lingerie, Oral Sex, Angst, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Character dealing with/avoiding their PTSD, Rimming, Drinking, Canon-Typical Violence, Blood, Bloody Kisses, Polyamory

The last outfit worked out so well, Kyle decides to to try another. He decides to pop into Warrior’s on a busy night and hang out just out of Guy’s reach. He's starting to be honest with himself about the reason he craves these distractions.

Kyle walked into Warriors and it was packed. Guy’s first thought was thank God, finally some help. The second was being annoyed that Kyle had the nerve to strut in here all dressed up, looking that good when Guy didn’t have a free hand to do anything about it. He threw the towel he was holding over his shoulder and stared his lover down.

Kyle was rocking his Hot Topic chic, and on anyone else it would probably look stupid. He had stolen Guy’s Warrior jacket and slung it over his favorite Nine Inch Nails shirt. He had on his Way Too Tight jeans and knee-high, lace-up boots. He’d done the thing with his hair that made it look sex-wrecked on purpose. He had on eyeliner too which made his cat eyes even more enticing. He dropped himself onto a bar stool, tossing his hair and licking his teeth.

“Whadda ya think ya doin’?” 

“Visiting.” Kyle lifted himself onto the bar, rummaging through the bottles until he found what he wanted. He sat back, opening the bottle and taking a long pull without grimacing. Kyle was the only person Guy had ever met who had the same vices, for better or worse. “Wanna watch me make this bottle disappear?” Kyle flattened his tongue and ran it up the neck of the bottle.

“Cut it out. It ain’t cute. M’already gettin’ killed ‘ere.” Guy snatched the bottle away, taking a swig. He was already about 3 shots away from his Baltimore accent becoming unintelligible. When Guy was drunk he sounded like he was trying to talk around a mouthful of marbles, overcompensating by steamrolling the vowels. “How ‘bout a lil’ help, sweetheart?”

“Stress relief?” Kyle fisted the bottle neck suggestively.

“Kyle,” Guy sighed, one irritated syllable. 

“I thought you liked taking your clothes off of me,” Kyle pouted.

“Kyle.” Two syllables now, a warning. “Ya hide from me, ya throw yaself at me. What’s going on with—“

“I’ll help you,” Kyle said, hopping over the bar. As he bent to grab glasses he rubbed his backside against Guy’s groin, “As long as you promise to help me later.” He started mixing drinks and running orders so Guy could run the kitchen. He could feel Guy’s eyes on him through the night as the hours dragged on.

__

They found a brief moment of respite. The customers were well into their drinks and conversations. The ticket printer had finally stopped screeching out orders for the moment. Guy leaned on the prep counter, breathing a little heavy but he had that satisfied smile on his face—a real one. This kind of work takes him back, keeps him humble.

Kyle held his arms out. “Hey stranger,” he said as Guy gave him a tight embrace.

“Ay yaself.”

Guy was relieved to finally get a chance to touch Kyle. Having him so close yet so far away was torture. He leaned back and took a languid look at his lovely partner.

“See something you like?”

“Yeah, everything.” Guy looked at the timers and tried to plan a way to drag his partner behind the walk-in without neglecting the friers. He rubbed Kyle’s back idly and his hands wandered under the hem of Kyle’s shirt. Instead of warm skin his fingers skidded over ribbons and straps and…lace. “What’s all this? This for me?”

Kyle put his arms around Guy’s neck, stroking his hair, “Who else?”

Someone hotter, Guy doesn’t say. He tilts his head, leaning into Kyle’s touch. He lets his lips part as an invitation but Kyle doesn’t rise up on his toes to kiss him anymore. So he studies Kyle’s face instead. There was a slight tremor in his breath but his gaze was steady. Guy could look into those green eyes forever. They’re a little dilated even in the florescent light of the kitchen. He’s horny, maybe a little nervous. If Guy wasn’t so drunk and insecure at this point he would’ve bent Kyle over the prep table already. He ran his hands over Kyle’s hips, giving his ass a gentle squeeze. He still hoped for the kiss he was too apprehensive to take for himself.

“Ah, ah,” Kyle tutted, removing the rogue hands, “That’s for later.”

“Aw, c’mon. Lemme see,” Guy tugged at the shirt again and Kyle smacked his hands.

“Oh, I will. Let’s finish this shift so you can take me home,” Kyle smiled. He looked over his shoulder and added, “Bring cash.”

Guy slid Dukes of Hazard style over the counter and manned the stove with renewed fervor.

__

They spent the flight home wrapped around each other, the path from the bar to their balcony memorized. Seeing them floating by, oblivious to the comings and goings of Oa, was a familiar sight by now. They landed and Guy pushed Kyle though the balcony door as Kyle shedded the jacket and threw it over the couch.

“So what’s the occasion?” Guy asked, still trying to get his hands at whatever Kyle was hiding under his clothes.

“Did you bring the money?”

“Baby I got ya money, don’cha worry,” Guy sang as he pulled stacks of rubber-banded bills out of his uniform vest.

“Good,” Kyle’s eyes went wide at the fistful of cash Guy produced. “I hope you have enough for me.”

“What’s mine is yours, baby, you know that. What do ya need this much money for?”

“I wanna play a game. I’m gonna try and run you broke. And, I wanna see how sleazy you can really be.”

“Well, ya got the right Guy for that,” Guy pointed at himself with both thumbs, “Ya not gonna murder me are ya, Jigsaw?”

“Go get changed,” Kyle said, slapping Guy’s ass as he headed to his old-bedroom-now-studio. “Unless you pick up strippers in your GL duds.”

“Pick up str—Oh!” Guy cackled and rubbed his hands together, “This is gonna be fun.” 

Guy strutted to their bedroom and hit the light. The room was awash in deep red, which Guy perceived as low light with heavy contrast. A construct couch and stripper pole glittered in the dim light. A stereo sat on the dresser softly playing music that was mostly bass. Two glasses, a bucket of ice, and a few liquor bottles sat next to the stereo. Kyle had really put the details into this one. He either did his research or had actually taken himself to a strip joint. 

Guy walked to the back of the room and dug about 15 years deep into the closet. Sleazy, he could do sleazy. He ran circles around sleazy while he fucked its sisters—raunchy, cheap, and trashy. Thankful he was such a pack rat, he shuffled through hideous clashing colors, leopard print, and mink. He got caught up with some of his old favorites, tossing a feather boa around his neck and a pimp hat on his head. He found a handheld Brick Breaker game and a canister of Pogs too. There really was way too much stuff in here. 

He found himself torn between the Jackie Treehorn getup or the white t-shirt and jeans from when he and Kyle first met. He ended up deciding on the simple jeans and t-shirt because it would be so disarming. Sleaze was in intention. Sleaze was in the heart. After he changed, he poured himself a drink and man-spread on the couch.

On the other side of the wall, Kyle paced in his studio. Guy was right—he was running hot and cold. They went from normal to nothing to struggling to routine and now he was freaking out. He missed the beginning when everything was easy, when routine was comfort. He needed distance from what had happened. If he got lost in his thoughts, he’d remember. It all came rushing to the front of his mind so fast. Only the sound of his own blood pumping in the dead silence of space. The metallic burning smell like the aftershock of a firework that permeated the vast emptiness between the stars. And all the blood. Guy’s blood, floating from his body like ribbons underwater. No sound. Only one heartbeat. No other sound. 

He leaned back to crack his back and took a deep breath. If he could find a way to talk about it, Guy would be right there with a hug and a joke but he just…couldn’t. He didn’t want to take the medicine, it made his mind crawl. It numbed everything, not just the pain. 

I can do this, he thought. We’re gonna have fun. This will be fun and everything will feel normal and then we can talk. I will talk to him. Later. I will. 

Kyle smoothed his hands over his shirt, thinking about the way Guy had been looking at him all night. He was gonna lose his mind when he saw what was underneath. No one had ever looked at him with that bare, pure desire. Not that openly. It made him feel anxious and heated all at once and he craved it. It made him insatiable. He felt undone.

He looked at his reflection in the mirror that sat atop his old dresser. He felt pretty confidant and liked how he looked. He wouldn’t say he was beautiful or gorgeous or any of the things Guy seemed to see. You really couldn’t toss a beachball in SoCal without hitting like, eight dudes that looked exactly like me, he thought. Kyle was just an art geek. Guy was a football star—tall and broad with those big blue eyes and a bright smile. Cut like a Greek statue to boot. He was honest and brave, gentle with children and animals, and spoke like a poet when you got him alone. 

Kyle smiled at himself. It was just Guy in there. On his worst behavior by request. Get in there and have some fun.

__

When Kyle entered he was still dressed, sadly. He acknowledged Guy with a quick glance and a small upturn of his lips. In the intense light he looked like one of his own charcoal drawings come to life. He walked over to the stereo and put on Head Like A Hole. He strode confidently to the pole and with his back to Guy, began to sway to the beat, shooting heated glances over his shoulder.

Guy couldn’t decide if Kyle was just nervous or if he genuinely had no plan. Or rhythm. He hid his smile behind his drink and threw a few ones at Kyle to encourage him. Seeing the money, Kyle put his back against the pole and slid down to his knees. He crawled towards the crumpled bills, picking them up and stuffing them in his pants. He looked Guy up and down again, struggling to suppress a warm smile. He bit his lip, trying to hold the disinterested, mysterious persona. 

Setting down his drink, Guy pulled out a five. He held it up and wagged his eyebrows. He set the bill on his knee, inviting Kyle to come and get it. Kyle crawled to Guy’s lap, slowly sliding his hands up Guy’s legs and grabbing the bill as he went. 

“Let’s see some skin, sweetheart,” Guy leered as Kyle stood up.

“Let’s see some money,” Kyle’s voice was low and breathy. Guy brandished another five, sitting up and sliding it down Kyle’s chest. He slid his hands under Kyle’s t-shirt, hooking his fingers in the top of Kyle’s jeans. As he shoved the bill in, he popped the button at the top of Kyle’s fly. 

Kyle bit his lip and tried not to shiver. More industrial rock flowed from the stereo. He swayed to the beat again, sliding his hands over his stomach, gradually showing more and more as he raised his shirt up.

“Ya look good, baby,” Guy murmured as he snapped the band on a stack of tens, “Let’s see those tits.” He started to whip bills at Kyle with a practiced flick of the wrist. 

Kyle quickly worked his shirt off, spinning it over his head and flinging it into the darkness. He let the money rain over him. Guy already had him feeling dirty and he loved it. Underneath his shirt, Kyle had been hiding lacy lingerie. A fitted, lace crop-top with heart cutouts on the front and back covered his pecs. At his waist was the top of a matching lace garter that disappeared underneath his pants. 

Guy let out a low whistle, “Take it off, gorgeous.”

With the sound of velcro separating, Kyle pulled the pants apart at the outside seams, pulling them out of the tops of his boots and revealing the rest of his black lace secret. The garter belt held up thigh high stockings that disappeared into the boots, and it rested atop a lace g-string. Everything had tiny heart cutouts that matched the crop top. The outfit was soft and feminine in appearance but well made to fit and support a man’s body. Guy licked his lips in stunned silence. What was it Smart Robin had called this feeling? Bi-panic?

Kyle turned and walked towards the pole. With one hand on the pole, he made a leisurely circle, then hooked his knee on it a did a little spin. Guy showered him with much appreciative whistling and money throwing. Kyle wondered how much was on the floor. It was too dark to really see. Seeing Guy’s enthusiasm, he did a slow fan kick and another spin. He heard Guy muttering curses and saw him adjust himself in his pants. Kyle leapt halfway up the pole and used the momentum to turn himself upside-down for a few turns. When he dismounted he dropped into a split. He smiled at Guy’s rapt, open-mouthed expression.

Kyle decided he needed a little break and walked over to the dresser, leaning and pouring himself a drink. Guy got up to follow him. 

“What’s ya name, sweetness?” Guy rumbled when he finally looked up from Kyle’s chest. He sidled up close enough that Kyle could feel his body heat. 

“Uh,” Shit. Kyle hadn’t thought of a cool stripper name. He wasn’t really sure that they were going to talk, “Sugar,” he said quickly, riffing off of Guy’s pet name and feeling stupid.

“Is that because you taste so good?” Guy chuckled darkly. Kyle could feel the heat rushing to his face and was glad for the dim lighting. “How ‘bout I buy you a drink?”

“Sure.”

“Ya new?”

“Yeah. Just started.”

“I can tell,” Guy said, making Kyle frown. “Nah, don’t worry, hon. It’s ok. You don’t have to be good when you’re this hot.”

“I do just fine,” Kyle said, irritated.

“Sure, baby. You’ll get there. I don’t usually go for the newbies, but I’ll make an exception for you. How much for a private dance?”

Kyle’s jaw tensed. I’ll show him. “Fifty,” he spat.

“Cheap. Works for me,” Guy said and Kyle bristled. Guy reached behind his back, producing another stack of bills from his waistband. He laid one down next to Kyle’s glass. Then he counted five more of them out, folded them over, and slid them down Kyle’s thigh and into the top of his stocking. “Play something nice and slow for us, yeah?”

Kyle was white-knuckling the edge of their makeshift bar, equal parts furious and aroused. Goddam that man. Guy flopped back onto the couch, smirking and patting his lap. Kyle glared for a moment more, then turned to the stereo and set up a few songs. 

Bass filled the room and Kyle approached, swaying and unhurried. Guy’s eyes had begun to glow softly in the dim room. He looked dangerous and it made Kyle’s heart pound. “No touching,” Kyle hissed as he took Guy’s wrists and planted his hands off to the sides of his lap. 

“Ya say that now,” Guy said and Kyle glared. “You’ll give it up. They all do. Do you know who I am?” Guy’s eyes glowed more brightly. “Climb on up into Warrior’s lap, Sugar.” Guy knew how weak Kyle still was for that memory. 

Kyle resisted the urge to clap his hand over his customer’s mouth; that thing was a lethal weapon. He dragged one leg over Guy’s lap and leaned on his shoulders to lift himself into a comfortable seat. 

Having Guy’s full, wanton attention was more unnerving than he could’ve imagined. He wondered what it was like to have that much confidence; an ego so big he’d have to move into outer space to have enough breathing room. It was hot though, being the center of attention for a man who only did what he wanted, how he wanted, if he wanted.

He ran his hands through Guy’s hair, softly grazing his fingertips down his neck, over his shoulders, down his chest. He leaned back, placing his palms on Guy’s knees to balance. He closed his eyes and relaxed into the beat of the music as he rolled his hips into Guy’s lap. He could easily feel Guy’s rapidly growing erection through the thin fabric of his lingerie. He dug his fingers into the muscle of Guy’s enormous thighs, conscious of how far open his own knees were spread to straddle his big man’s lap. Guy’s body was about seventy percent shoulders and forty percent thighs. Kyle sighed to himself as he pictured his big sex machine naked. 

Kyle loved their size difference, how Guy could make him feel small and surrounded. Between that and Guys big meaty hands it felt like he was living his guilty pleasure yaoi manga fantasies. Do not laugh about yaoi hands right now, Rayner. Get your head in the game, Kyle thought as he pressed his lips together to suppress a smile. He blew out a shaky breath as he fought off thoughts of giant green construct hands.

“Breathin’ heavy for me already?” Guy’s voice brought Kyle back to the moment. Kyle’s eyes opened and he took in the faintly glowing tattoos that had appeared on Guy’s—Warrior’s—face and arms. Kyle’s pulse raced. His crush on Guy the moment they met had been immediate and overwhelming. Images of Guy shirtless and later tattooed had filled his dreams and fantasies since then. 

Kyle was suddenly aware of Guys hands traveling lightly up his ribs, thumbs brushing so gently against his nipples making him jump. 

“Hey!” Kyle gasped, “No touching!”

“If you say so.” Guy held up his hands in mock surrender before returning them to his sides. 

Kyle wanted that touch and it killed him to enforce the rules of their game. How the fuck was Guy not out of money yet? On cue, Guy pulled another bill from his pocket. He dragged it down Kyle’s abs and over the lacy panties, making lazy circles around Kyle’s bulge. Kyle groaned as he realized Guy had completely flipped the power balance and that was perfectly fine with him. Guy brazenly began rubbing Kyle’s cock over the underwear with nothing but the bill separating them. 

“N-no touching,” Kyle breathed as he leaned into Guy’s big, warm hand. Guy’s fingers were creeping around the edges of the panties, teasing Kyle’s shaft and sending his blood thrumming in his ears. 

“You’re right. Rules are rules,” Guy said, tucking the money into Kyle’s garter belt, “And I don’t want either of us getting kicked out.” He pulled another bill out of his pocket, trailing the movement over Kyle’s thigh making him shiver. Biting the bill between his teeth he asked, “How ‘bout a kiss instead?”

“Keep your hands down,” Kyle desperately tried to put any kind of authority in his voice. He leaned forward, putting his hands on Guy’s shoulders again. Their chests pressed together as he leaned in. He brushed their lips together as he ducked in close to take the bill from Guy’s mouth with his own. 

Guy’s hand clenched suddenly in Kyle’s hair. Kyle let out a startled sound, dropping the bill and Guy smashed their mouths together in a rough kiss. Kyle’s body clamped down around Guy’s as he kissed back savagely. 

“Wait, hey!” Kyle hissed, shoving his arms between them and clamping a hand over Guy’s mouth. “No touching, goddamnit!” He could feel Guy’s laugh rumble into his palm. Guy grabbed two greedy handfuls of Kyle’s ass and Kyle’s hands flew to his wrists to stop him.

“Ya want me kid, I can feel it,” Guy said.

“Still costs extra.”

“Name ya price.”

“You can’t afford it.”

“Bet. I’d sell my soul for you, hell, I’ll sell my fucking bar for you, baby.”

“A thousand,” Kyle panted, “A thousand and I’ll let you take me home.”

“Done.” Guy reached into the back of his waistband again and Kyle began digging behind his shoulders, trying to pull his shirt up and see where he was hiding all this money. Guy’s hand wrapped around the back of Kyle’s head and he shoved a banded stack of cash into Kyle’s mouth. Kyle made an indignant sound, and then another as he was hauled over Guy’s shoulder. Guy slapped Kyle’s vulnerable ass as he stood up. Kyle banged his fists playfully against Guy’s back as he grumbled something that sounded suspiciously like fucking barbarian.

Guy dumped Kyle unceremoniously in the center of the room. “Get on ya knees, slut,” he growled as he unzipped his jeans. 

Kyle opened his mouth to say something angry and was immediately distracted by Guy pulling his thick cock out. Kyle bit his lip as he stared, his retort and the rack of cash both forgotten.

“C’mere,” Guy said softly this time. Kyle crawled towards him until he was at Guy’s feet. He ran his hands up Guy’s legs as he rose up on his knees. He tugged Guy’s jeans down, focused on the prize in front of him. “Look at me,” Guy whispered, fingers trailing under Kyle’s chin. 

Kyle looked up into Guy’s desperate gray-blue eyes. He took Guy’s length in his hand and gave it a long, slow lick from bottom to top. He loved blowing Guy. It was the one thing he could do where Guy would be selfish and just take. He locked eyes with Guy and proceeded to give him a thousand dollar blowjob.

__

They laid tangled together naked, quietly panting into each other’s skin. Kyle’s legs ached from riding Guy’s big body so enthusiastically. He ran his fingers idly through the soft hair on Guy’s belly. He looked up at Guy’s chin from where he was tucked against the bigger man’s side. Guy’s arm was flung over his face and his whole body was sticky with sweat. 

“We didn’t even make it to the bed this time,” Kyle laughed.

Guy moved his arm to look down and smile, “I’ve always wanted to fuck on a pile of money.”

“Where did all that money come from, anyways?”

“Well…okay, don’t get mad. Cuz lemme tell ya, I really mean I’d sell the whole bar for you to hit me with the Hyuk Guk 9000.”

“The what?” Kyle chortled.

“The Super Sucker. The Gaginator. That thing you do where you’re sucking and swallowing at the same time.”

Kyle buried his face in Guy’s chest as he laughed hysterically. 

“So, yeah. No disrespect to the master here. But this,” Guy reached behind his back, pretending to dig in his ass, “This is just…Monopoly money.” He let a fistful of bills rain down. Kyle put his hand out to catch a few and then they just, disappeared. 

“Oh, you jerk! You dickhead!”

“You wanted sleazy.” Guy shrugged.

“That’s fucked.”

“Exactly. Ow!” Guy chuckled as Kyle punched him in the arm. “Hey. Hey. You’re worth every penny of the real thing. Sorry your man’s a broke chud.” 

“You’re not a chud,” Kyle smiled. “I just can’t believe I let you neg me and rip me off. You get me so distracted,” he said, pushing himself up to straddle Guy again. 

Guy clicked his tongue and looked away. 

“I mean it,” Kyle said grabbing Guy’s chin, bringing his gaze back. Kyle ran his hands up and down Guy’s big shoulders and biceps. “You’re a beast. You’re insanely hot. I get so worked up just looking at you.”

Guy looked away again, smiling this time, “Thank you,” he said softly. He grabbed Kyle’s hips, feeling his body responding again already. “So, you gonna tell me what all this is about?”

“What do you mean?” Kyle asked, smile faltering.

“Look, all this has been really hot and really fun. I’m here for it anytime you want it, especially when you wanna get freaky.”

“So? What’s the problem then?”

“Baby,” Guy ran his thumbs along Kyle’s hipbones, “You barely let me touch you for months.”

Kyle sighed and started to stand up.

“No.” Guy held him firmly in place. “Don’t run from me, I’m not gonna push. I just wanna know when you’re gonna talk to me.”

“Not yet,” Kyle whispered, laying his hands over the vicious scar on Guy’s abdomen, “I can’t. I’m sorry.”

“Okay.” Guy let that hang in the quiet for a span. “C’mere,” he bade, gently tugging Kyle to lay at his side again. Kyle went willingly, tucking himself into his spot, resting his head over Guy’s heart. “You hear that?” Guy asked, gently pressing Kyle’s head into his chest. “That’s yours.”

“I can’t lose anyone else, Guy. I can’t lose you. I can’t. I’m digging two holes this time.”

“I’m not going anywhere. Nothing’s gonna take me from you.” Guy kissed the top of Kyle’s head and he squeezed him close. “Nothing.”

[tordthing]

y'all don't understand how being a silly little bastard drastically improves your mental health. I love making stupid villain monologues about my horrifically evil plans (Kyle is so tired of me it's very funny) (my evil plan is going outside in a very fancy outfit)

[l0v3tast3]

can we have more hcs w young!reader :o they were so cute, do u think you could write like sparring w them or something, ty!!

✎ of course omggg <3 i love this concept whenever i see anyone else write this kind of thing with platonic young reader i eat that shit up !!! also merry christmas and happy last day of hannukah to all who celebrate!!

✎ tags : gender neutral!reader, written with 19 y/o reader in mind, all platonic relationships, fluff, young!reader is stereotypical gen z kinda, this is probably the most light-hearted thing i've ever written but there's separate angst at the end because i can't stop myself, as usual it's not really proofread

♡ so of course it takes awhile for you to come out of your shell around the rest of the 141. the previously youngest one of the group, kyle, is 7 whole years older than you, so it's a bit awkward at first.

♡ but once you're comfortable around them, you let your guard down a little and start letting your "regular" personality show instead of the "work" one. this involves bouncing-off-the-walls levels of energy and constant jokes and references that only kyle gets, and that's only sometimes. the other three guys just exchange a look and move on.

♡ you're constantly doing little dances and just fidgeting around, playing with anything you can get your hands on and always bouncing a leg (also never actually sitting like a normal person, price doesn't understand how you're comfortable most of the time). once, when it was just you and soap, you taught him a dance he thought looked fun, but made you promise to never tell anyone else. you told ghost as soon as you saw him next, and that was the first time you ever saw ghost smile (under the mask, of course, but you could tell).

♡ you don't really respect the more "arbitrary" boundaries; you would randomly take food off of the other guy's plates without asking and you always had to be invading someone's personal space. after lots of scolding and you acting like they were denying you a fundamental human right, they learned that it really was easier to just accept it and give up. you don't take food from ghost's plate, because you may be a little dumb sometimes but you aren't stupid. sometimes he shoves his leftovers in your direction if he notices you aren't eating as much that day.

♡ when you aren't terrorizing one of the 141 members, they keep an eye on you while you focus on whatever your latest interest is with an intensity that they'd only expect from you on actual life-or-death missions. it always causes soap some actual concern for you, but you just think it's because he can't sit still, ever.

♡ once, after you had all returned from a mission, you went into your room to shower, came out, got something to eat, then went into your room and proceeded to spend the next 3 days completing the newest pokemon game. full pokedex, awesome outfit, full level 100 team, you had it all, and you proudly shoved the switch screen in their faces to show them your achievements once you deemed yourself done. they learned you were a perfectionist pretty early on, while they took turns checking on you every few hours.

♡ you'll do the thing of casually dropping something horrible that happened to you into a conversation, as if it was just some silly thing that happened the other day. they all just kind of do a double take, because none of them actually talk about that stuff. you just look up from whatever app you were absently fiddling with on your phone and wonder why everyone went quiet; they just move on, as usual.

૮ ’• ˕ •` ა here, have some sparring headcanons now!

♡ when you and ghost sparred for the first time, you swore up and down he was out to break every bone in your body. he told price that it was the easiest he'd went on a recruit in years (he did also say you did much better than he expected). despite your complaints, you got back up every single time he knocked you on your ass, and you quickly adapted to the way ghost fought. you still didn't win a single round, but that was more of a him-being-really-big thing.

♡ soap only goes easy enough on you to not break any bones, but it doesn't take much to get him fired up, and sparring is no exception. you spend the entire session on the defensive, just trying to keep yourself all intact. you always lecture him that you aren't the actual goddamn enemy before you spar with him now while he rolls his eyes and says you're being dramatic.

♡ kyle claims he isn't going easy on you but everyone knows he is. he can't help it; usually he doesn't care that much when he accidentally actually hurts someone when sparring, but the thought of leaving a scar on you rubs him the wrong way. he doesn't ever tell anyone this, but everyone sees how he always acts like an older brother to you.

♡ you only actually spar with price once, mostly as a joke, after you're all more acquainted. you're acting all cocky, basically just saying he's old and you'll put him in the retirement home a couple years early. you're on your back in less than five seconds with him looking down at you, a loud laugh booming out of his chest.

♡ one time, ghost must have been sick or something, because the match ended with you making what would have been the killing blow in a real fight. you had stared in amazement at your achievement, then started yelling at the other guys to ask if they had seen what you had done. ghost let you have your victory, finding your astronomical excitement funny (on the inside, of course).

♡ kyle is your easiest target. usually he doesn't even want to spar with you anymore, because he knows you'll probably end up throwing him to the ground with your full strength and saying you don't need to go easy on him, he's a grown ass man. you've mastered how to use his weight against him, and he knows it. he also knows the look you get when you're walking up to him to ask to spar, and at this point he just points you to soap or ghost and shoos you away. one time he actually said "go on, git!" to you; his british accent made it much more funny than he had intended.

♡ fighting against soap kind of has 50-50 odds of you winning. if you're not afraid to start bleeding in multiple areas that day, you'll most likely be able to pin him. if you don't feel really like it, then you pretty much just have to run away. your before-sparring lecture for him eventually gets accompanied by an after-sparring lecture from you while he helps you put band-aids on the new cuts and scrapes.

₍ᐢ.᎔.ᐢ₎ okay a couple angsty ones because i can't help it,,,

♡ price knows how young you are, and you know he does without him having to tell you, because sometimes you catch him looking at you with sad eyes that see a lot more than you do. usually, if the conditions are just right, you're all for attempting to get the team members to open up to you, but this is what you and price don't talk about. instead, you tell him not to worry, that you'll at least outlive him.

♡ they're all waiting for that one day that, on one of their missions, you'll see something or have to do something that you won't come back from, because it's inevitable in this line of work. but you find a way to smile, even after the worst days, and you always say it's because someone has to.

[dyns33]

Witches

Flufftober 10 - Michael x Sweet little witch Reader

Yup, so, after several months, and almost a year for this AU!, Michael Langdon is back on this blog ! 

Living only surrounded by women could have been a dream or a nightmare for a man.

A dream for a single man.

A nightmare, if we add that these women were all witches, and for the most part annoying and slutty girls.

But Michael wasn't a normal man, and he was dating the cutest witches of them all, so while it wasn't always easy, it was an acceptable situation.

Miss Cordelia had become a bit like his second mother. Myrtle Snow, though she refused to admit it, was the grandmother who adored him and showered him with gifts whenever she had the chance.

And the other witches were his sisters.

But they were Y/N's sisters first, and of course, early in their relationship, they had been suspicious of him, not wanting Michael to play with their friend's feelings and hurt her.

He could understand that, even if it was a bit vexing. He found it perfectly logical and admirable that this great family fiercely protected all of its members, and so he had agreed to answer their questions and pass their silly tests, to prove that he was serious, that he really loved Y/N, and that he was worthy to be with her.

           "I think I have a say in this, right ?" replied the sweet little witch, who also understood her sisters' fears, but didn't like them getting into her business like this, or annoying Michael who had already had enough problems like that in his life.

           "He's just going to pass the tests to show that he'll be a good boyfriend. It won't be as hard as what he had to do to become the Supreme, but it will be for a better reason !"

           "... No one has ever been through these ordeals. You didn't ask Kyle for anything. And there are several other couples in the house."

           "Yes. Lesbians. It's different. And Kyle is untouchable, Zoe would kill us. Come on Michael, unless you don't love our sister enough."

           "I'm ready."

Michael wasn't really afraid of what they had prepared for him. He was powerful. He wasn't really human. And he truly loved Y/N. With the strength that her love gave him, he could do anything. Even more if she stood by his side.

           "No !" Madison said, clapping his hand, as he went to take Y/N's. "No touchy ! Not until you've passed the tests."

           "... Alright. Let's be done with it quickly then. What do you want me to do ? Go to hell ? Resist the fire ? Spawn gold ?"

           "Oh, you didn't get it, my poor Michael. It's not a test of magic, but of trust. To find out if you are family. So you're going to go and steal one of Cordelia's jewelry first."

           "... No."

           "Good answer ! We don't steal from loved ones. Well, not the powerful ones at least. Now you're going to tell us a secret. Something shameful ! Watch out, we'll know if you're lying."

           "... It's ridiculous."

           "Do you want to be with Y/N or not ?"

           "... Shameful how ?"

The famous trials quickly turned into what looked like a slumber party where a boy had been invited by mistake, or had gone to please his beloved girlfriend, who had not been able to defend him against the other girls.

After confessing that he had slept with a plush until today, only stopping to replace the teddy bear with Y/N, Michael let the witches play with his hair, paint his nails, put make up on him, and he even agreed to put on a dress.

If it made them happy.

Even if he didn't find it amusing to be treated like a doll by these idiots, he wasn't ashamed of what they did to him, binary constructions being a stupid invention of society.

He knew he was still as handsome and strong, even in this outfit. He was even more handsome than most of the girls present, who also knew it, and must have felt a little envious when they saw him.

They must also envy Y/N, because in the end, he was hers, and only hers. Michael let them play with him only so he could be with his sweet little witch forever.

Like him, Y/N did not approve of her sisters' behaviour, but she knew there was no point fighting against them. If he proved that they could trust him, then Michael could stay without them bothering him later and they would be happy.

For the final ordeal, Michael had to swear, spilling his blood, that he would never betray the Coven or Y/N, and that he would be turned into a slug if he even dared to even think about it. He did so without the slightest hesitation.

           "Good, pretty Michael, you're one of us now. You can kiss the bride."

           "Very funny." he sighed, finally taking Y/N's hand. "Let's go to our room my love."

           "Yes. You need a bath." his sweet witch sneered, touching his pink cheek.

           "Why ? Don't you find me 'pretty' like that ?"

           "Of course. Always. But they haven't stopped touching you, I'm sure you want a bath."

She was right. And even though he was pretty sexy with that hairstyle, that mascara and that red lipstick, he had fun kissing Y/N everywhere, leaving marks that would force her to wash with him, he wanted her to the only one to touch him from now on.

[what-i-call-men]

Hey could you do the Evans’ characters reacting to reader’s stretch marks?🥺 thank you luv you

The Evans and reacting to the Reader’s stretch marks

Warnings: I am NOT going to write stretch marks as something negative or something to be ashamed of/insecure about! They are just a natural part of bodies- so they are just a part of the body in my writing. The only negative parts are from people like Kai, tate, and Jeff.

Tate:

As much as ya’ll want to think you’re the exception, Tate is probably just like kai, just a little more stupid. He probably thinks they’re something worse at first, pulling you aside and making sure you’re ok. When you tell him that they’re stretch marks and not scars, he will probably scrunch up his nose and roll his eyes, mostly because he’s a teenage boy and he’s uninformed about what they really are. After he is, he really doesn’t pay them any mind.

Kit:

Oh boy, I think it depends where they are honestly. If they're on like your thighs or ass he probably doesn’t really notice them, But if it’s your stomach- especially if they were from pregnancy- he will adore them, probably rubbing lotion on them and kissing them. He definitely likes to think about how they came from your kid, definitely thankful for every day.

Kyle:

Pre death I think Kyle probably doesn’t notice them. He thinks you’re hot exactly as you are as every teenage boy is. Post death Kyle is a bit different. He loves to lay on your lap, stomach or chest and trace the lines in awe. He loves to just stare at them and sometimes he will take a marker and draw on them if he’s feeling particularly inspired. He will sometimes equate them to the tiger in his kids books (early on in recovering).

Jimmy:

Ok let's be real, we all Jimmy loves a good thicc partner. That thiccness is not unaccompanied by natural stretch marks obviously. I think he loves them honestly. He definitely gets a little hard when you wear outfits that show them off, that includes when you perform, which makes his performances a bit more challenging. He most definitely peppers kisses all along them every night whether in a sexual way or not.

James:

I think he’s conflicted between thinking his partner should be perfect and the thought that you're already perfect. He definitely worships the ground you walk on so anything others may deem as undesirable he will love endlessly. James definitely loves all marks and scars on your body. He most likely doesn't say anything about them though, just silently admires them.

Kai:

Honestly we all know what i’m about to say, Kai is a dick about them. But let's just pretend that he makes an exception for you when you two are dating (Pretend he’s not a dick for a minute with me). I think even if you were his exception, he would choose to ignore rather than love them like the other guys. He might not even look at them or notice them all that much. In actuality Kai probably will call you fat or even get you those “magic stretch mark removal” cream because he’s an ass.

Malcolm:

He probably Isn’t one to immediately notice them. I mean he has plenty of resources that “fix” this type of thing but he doesn’t see any reason to even try because they’re just part of natural life. Sometimes he will just remind you how amazing your ass looks, accompanied with a gentle smack and the two of you will usually laugh it off and move on.

Jeff:

He is honestly probably just like Kai and Tate, but a bit more of a himbo. He doesn’t really know that they’re natural, but he definitely wouldn’t ever put them on one of his sex dolls. If he doesn't see them in pornos they probably don’t really exist. Along with the ignorance, he probably also buys you those “Magic” creams. After you explain it to him, he probably just shrugs and moves on in whatever he was doing.

Austin:

He’s probably the kind of artist that refers to them as something artful like “Angel scratches”. Austin probably will write about them and all your “imperfections” in his music because you are his inspiration for a lot of the love songs he writes. If he feeds from you, he will probably add some of his own marks along with the stretch marks.

[mrs-march-ahs]

How would the evans react to the reader being insecure? thank you😊

What Would The Evans Do If You Were Insecure

My 300 follower special gave me so many requests! They are all incredible and I am trying to do as many as possible! I may not do them all, but all of your requests were incredible thank you for helping me celebrate this amazing achievement :) This is for @tatestripedsweater and anybody else who (for some reason) doesn’t feel like a work of art today, this is an Evan Peters reminder that you are a gift to this world and I love you.

Enjoy:)

----

Tate

-Would definitely check for self-harm marks -If they were there, he would kiss them or lick the blood off them if they were fresh -Hold you while you cry -Would carefully listen to your insecurities and would try to tell you how beautiful you are to him -It wouldn’t matter how much you hated yourself or how much you felt like the world hated you because to him you were perfect and you always will be -Kiss your tears away -Suggest cuddling or watching a horror film so you can sit between his legs and he can wrap his arms around you to protect you

Kit

-You wouldn’t tell him you felt insecure, but he would be able to tell - “I’m not sure I’m doing the best I can” - “You’re the best wife, the best mother, the best person I’ve ever met, you’re everything we want and need and so much more” -Would carefully whisper everything to do, and would touch you ever so softly -Constantly tucking your hair behind your ear as he listened to you -Kiss your tears away -If you started explaining something in a panicky way, looking down, eyes filled with tears, then he would cup your cheeks in his firm hands and would put his thumb over your lips to shush you, then wipe your tears -Constantly hold you and place little kisses everywhere - “Isn’t mama the most beautiful lady alive?” -The kids would learn by example and would start giving you and each other compliments - “I love the way you can bake so well mama” -Kids are brutally honest so when they tell you you’re pretty, you legally cannot be insecure

Franken Kyle

-He would come up behind you and put his hands on your stomach, and when he squeezed it, you’d get pissed -Push his hands away and he would get the message -But later that day when he was spooning you and put his hand on your stomach again, you pushed his hands away and tried to explain that you didn’t want him touching it, which would make him sad -He would constantly be trying to squish your stomach or your thighs and you’d hate it -Until one day you couldn’t handle it anymore and snapped - “I constantly have to take your hands off me, what is your obsession with my fat? Can’t you tell it upsets me when you touch it?” -He would be really upset but also incredibly confused how you can not love it - “I love… tummy” - “Well I don’t, so stop touching it, please” -He would be upset but nod, until later than day in bed he would beg you to feel it - “I wanna… squish… please” -No Kyle, you would insist, because you felt like even though he didn’t know what he was doing, he was reminding you of your insecurities and flaws - “I love… so much”, he would say, laying his head on the bottom of your tummy and putting his arms around your thighs -You couldn’t help but run your fingers through his hair and understand that he can’t comprehend why you’d be insecure about something so soft and squishable -If a man not burdened by society’s rules and regulations loved you so much, why did you worry about the way you looked?

Jimmy

- “What do you have to be insecure about doll?” -Make sweet love to you -Kiss every inch of your body for days after your sad conversation -He would run you a big bubble bath and insist to wash you - “I’m not a child Jimmy, I can wash myself” - “Shhh just let Daddy take care of his princess” -It would make you blush and you would hesitantly let him run the sponge all around your body -The softness in his touch would give you shivers -He’d let you relax for a little bit but stay in the room to make sure you don’t cry -Might even carry you to the bed -Would insist on putting lotion on you -He would kiss every inch of your body as he rubbed the cream in - “You know what I love about you? You don’t care what people think, that’s why you’re okay being out with a freak like me in public” - “Jimmy I don’t care about your hands, I love you the way you are” - “Ironic, ain’t it babe?” -He’d laugh against your skin as he kissed you and it’d give you goosebumps -He’d start kissing your neck whispering compliments in your ear about how good you are at certain things and how gorgeous you are doing certain things - “Want Jimmy to cheer you up? The Jimmy method?” -If you need cheering up with a Jimmy smut, click the link here.

James

-Would be genuinely confused -Can’t comprehend that somebody as incredible and beautiful as you could be insecure ­- “I just feel so ugly” - “But you are fully aware, that you are not, right dear?” -Would buy you lots of new outfits and dresses to make you feel better -Would convince you to try them on for him and would tell you how immaculate you look in all of them - “Printed fonts aren’t as beautiful as true calligraphy, wouldn’t you agree?”. You hesitantly nod, unsure of what the link is to the current conversation you’re having. “It’s the imperfections… the little man-made details are what elevate an art piece, to a piece of art”, he explains, sliding his finger down the stretch mark on your thigh. - “The stories that your body tells darling… and you would prefer to have plain porcelain skin”, he says, almost mumbling, and clicks his tongue a couple times. -Incredible eye contact as he told you how beautiful you are -These headcannons closely link to the ones I wrote about the Evans cheering you up, if you want more detail on this James scenario, click here.

Kai

-If his softer side didn’t come out, he’d act like you’re stupid - “And how exactly is crying going to solve your issues?” - “Insecurities are what make you weak, it’s easier to manipulate you when you show your soft spots” -But if, somehow, his soft side did show, he would be a lot sweeter -You’d be curled up in bed sobbing your heart out -And he would come up and sit on the edge of the bed quietly, and listen to you cry for a bit, waiting for you to notice that he’s there -When you noticed you’d nervously ramble about how insecure you are and he’d tell you to stfu - “You don’t fit the cookie cutter? You make your own fucking cookies” - “Stop worrying. From now on, you walk like you are a gift to this world” - “If somebody questions your confidence, you show them why they’re wrong and you’re right” -He wouldn’t even realise how sweet the tough love was

Mrs March Ahs

-That’s me -I’d sit and listen carefully to you rambling about how insecure you are -I’d nod as I listen so you know I’m savouring every word and take in everything you’re saying -Let you rest your head on my big ol’ boobies as I stroke your head -You’d be automatically relaxed from sniffing me -I usually smell like oranges -I don’t eat them I just have a perfume that smells like oranges -Before you know it you’re drifting off to sleep forgetting about your insecurities as I sing one direction songs to you -Give you 143 compliments a day