#i know these fandoms don't really overlap but i had to share my thoughts somewhere

[daydreamingbird]

seriously ororon in genshin impact reminds me so much of xiaoge in the lost tomb series/daomu biji I just instanlty fell in love with the character

like look at this dude! he's just a poor little baby who takes care of cute animals and grows vegetables in his little garden. just like xiaoge who also looks all edgy and cold but actually has one of the kindest heart and is trying to looking after everyone else

[adelle-ein]

rambling about the ocd

so yeah yesterday not only did my ocd therapist tell me i have the highest ocd score she's ever seen (and like, she is not a new or inexperienced practitioner by any means) she told me that apparently a lot of my thought and behavior patterns are obsessive-compulsive. and a lot of them tie back to really extreme morality ocd, which actually explains a lot about the ways i've acted my entire life that were just brushed off as weird/quirky/generically anxious. even my other ocd "types" (contamination, etc) are all manifestations of severe morality ocd (i fear various forms of contamination because it makes me immoral, essentially) (that's fun).

i really didn't think it was that bad. i didn't think it was especially bad at all, truth be told, just one of the many diagnoses that make up my weirdness. but actually it's probably been the root cause for everything all along, including stuff i dismissed as just my own weirdness, like the extreme sensory processing stuff that's developed lately (fwiw i bought some new water bottles and significantly improved my hydration so working towards recovery on that). but since i don't have any compulsions that cause myself visible physical harm i didn't think it could be Real ocd. like i don't handwash to a dangerous level or self harm or starve myself, so i thought it was okay (nvm that i have caused myself extreme and permanent-feeling mental damage lol)

i've been perpetually exhausted, 24/7, since i was fourteen. because my brain's been at constant war with itself and still is and inhibits everything i do. because every single action i take is like moving through a molasses of obsessive thoughts and finishing compulsive rituals. my self esteem is somewhere in the marianas trench bc i feel like i'm constantly violating moral norms 24/7. the drugs that allow me even basic function worsen the fatigue and the brain fog and the weakness, but i need them or i literally can't stop doing compulsions. like if they stop making it or something i would need 24/7 care from my parents again bc i wouldn't be able to feed myself or shower or sleep.

i had been wondering a lot the last couple of years if i was autistic, especially with the sensory stuff, but it's now dawning on me that i just have the absolute worst fucking ocd that manifests itself in literally every aspect of my behavior and thought patterns. it looks very autistic on a surface level and gets me a high raads-r score, but probably isn't. like i could still be autistic, sure, but it's most likely that i just have incredibly severe ocd with every "less common" side effect known to man - sensory issues, routine and planning, social anxiety, stimming, etc etc. i did know that ocd/autism/adhd symptom overlap is huge but not that it was this huge.

none of this really changes anything, like i still need treatment, she's still gonna see me, but like, fucking hell. even i had been downplaying how sick i was, and probably still am, like even now i'm like well it can't be THAT bad i'm not dead :) but it is that bad. it's insanely bad. it's far worse than the "well everyone's kinda anxious and depressed right?" standard i keep tricking myself into believing i am. even now i'm STILL fucking questioning it bc i see people with ocd who seem so much worse than me but really i think that's more about what people are willing to put on the internet....i do not share my worst obsessions and compulsions generally and even when speaking privately to people i still downplay things heavily, i just can't do it. i'm extremely good at masking and hiding and downplaying because i've been doing it my whole life and a lot of my compulsive behaviors look pretty normal from the outside...but they're still very bad and the obsession levels are out of control high. and i've been doing so badly lately that i've had to step back from social media a lot because literally everything is a severe trigger at this point, from fandom drama to serious political stuff, because i get caught in a severe mental morality feedback loop every time i see something that can trigger it which is now a lot of things. but the stepping back also triggers a morality loop wheeeeeee (i see a ukraine flag emoji and have to sit there processing extremely distressing Moral Thoughts about ukraine and the war, for like...a while. to give you an idea of how severe it's gotten and why i've absolutely had to go quiet and careful with how i interact with pretty much everything, esp online where extreme positions are really common. i'm also really prone to picking up other people's anxieties and compulsions rn so again have to be SUPER careful what i look at - a tumblr poll about cleaning habits or similar can trigger compulsive behavior...)

it would be super cool if the ssa had cared about any of this but that ship's long sailed and they don't believe in or speak with therapists anyway (at least not in my state, they refused to even contact my therapist for the review they kicked me out over. even MD mental health practitioners aren't really exempt, they treated my psychiatrist incredibly rudely...)

but yeah no wonder i'm so dysfunctional and struggling so badly if i'm this abnormally ill ig

[theoxenfree]

heyheyyyy i absolutely adore your writing and i've read thru pretty much everything on your masterlist at least twice whoops,, (a few of your links don't work tho, just thought to let ya know! not that that stopped me lmaoooo) honestly i think you've honed your craft rlly well and it shows! settings and characterization never miss, neither do the interesting storylines or impressive and immersive worldbuilding. it's sad to see your works don't get the reach they should. :( entirely up to you but i rlly recommend you should check out the #yandereoc community, and explore using some of those tags maybe. folks over there would adore what you write, and i reckon you could branch your writing out to a similar niche that goes hand in hand with the monsterfucking community. (lots of overlapping blogs already) that aside, i hope you keep writing because you've truly captured me! opaque was a masterpiece that made me feel really sad, and the worldbuilding (descriptions of the cyberpunk-esque city and society) blew me away. montague was a fav as well, with how seductive and casually cruel he felt. and the scholar husband??? wow a classic fantasy executed so well, truly. something about the swirling darkness had me clawing at my walls btw. totally normal about it. yep. totally. thanks for doing what you do + have a lovely day <3 - 🌈

heya! first off: I'll definitely check those links shortly when I get some downtime, but it may because most of the pieces listed don't have stories to them yet. they're just there as placeholders under actual pieces are done.

but, nonetheless, I'll go through them and check it out to make sure I didn't goof the links somewhere at some point 💕

second: ive thought about applying the yandereoc tag to try to expand my reach, but I'm not entirely sure if that is a niche that I exactly fall into. with some of my stories, absolutely: montague from blood catalase, father shaw from a flesh sin, possessed!husband from imposter—but not everything I write does fall into that, y'know? I'll probably tack those on as an additional attempt tho! thank you for the suggestion!

as for the reach, I knew that starting an OC x reader blog wasn't going to have much reach at all most of the time.

I knew feedback would pretty much be shit unless the right people came along to reblog (which it's garbage smaller blogs like me have to rely on that to get seen).

I'm grateful to have a handful of my very kind, supportive moots from my fandom days who still follow me here and my writing and leave me feedback and talk to me to help me as best they can.

also grateful to a lot of new moots and folks who follow who have been amazingly supportive and share their thoughts and such 💕💕💕

but, yeah, I kinda knew my stuff wouldn't reach very far which is why I don't get up in arms about it anymore. but, which is why I am aggressively in the fucking tags bc I don't deal well with being swept under the rug lmao

as for the feedback on my other stuff, thank you SO MUCH!! I'm always so glad to hear that people like stories like opaque and blood catalase bc those projects take me months of hard work and losing my fucking mind.

"casually cruel" is such a good way to describe montague too, lmao that's CRAZY 💀💀

the swirling darkness had me going feral writing to, believe you me.

I appreciate you tremendously for leaving me this ask and sharing your thoughts. like, comments like this absolutely make all my efforts and time put into my work absolutely worth it. and it reminds me why I love writing as much as I do

I still have a long way to go as a writer, a lot more I can learn and hone and improve. but, these sorts of messages let me know I'm going the right away 💕💕🫂🫂

[thebiballerina]

I cannot speak for this specific crossover, but I have some hypotheses about weirdly popular crossover combinations, in general. Regardless of impetus, a few interested people can rapidly grow into a self-sustaining community once you get the ball rolling, especially with two pre-existing pools of fans to recruit from.

As for what gets the trend started in the first place, here are some patterns I notice:

One of the properties has a similarity that is a core component that people like in the other. (In this Batman and Danny Phantom case, presumably double life + superheroing? Same for DC and Miraculous Ladybug.)

One of the fandoms has an aspect that would either cause interesting encounters with the other, be incongruous in an amusing way, or some combination. (Supernatural and Criminal Minds, the top crossover in the Criminal Minds tag on AO3: The main characters of Supernatural are, at various points, legally serial killers and thought to be insane. So you have the Criminal and the Minds. Except both assessments are wrong, if not entirely untrue, and the Criminal Minds protagonists are supposed to see through that sort of thing. Ergo, interesting and incongruous.)

"The fandom has pockets," meaning that there are spaces in the plot or character backstories in at least one fandom that are excellent opportunities to fit another fandom in there. (If I had to guess, White Collar-DC crossovers are at least partially attributable to this.) (Also, thank you to the Leverage (2008) creators for helping me describe this one, since I believe they stated this as a reason not to fill in canon backstories too much. That might have been in one of the commentaries? Leverage fans, help me out here, I know it was said somewhere.)

Usual fan population overlap: Overlap in themes, character archetypes, genres, cast, creators, eras, or settings. For TV shows before streaming was so ubiquitous, you could even get overlap based on timeslots for airing. (This is another one that I think contributes to White Collar and DC: I can spot a fair few Catwoman-type traits in Neal Caffrey, and I can only presume there were plenty of shared influences, if not direct inspiration. And, back to the DP-DC discussed by OP: My information is only based on a cursory web search, but Danny Phantom aired 2004-2007, and Jason Todd was officially resurrected in 2005, with 2005-2011 being the era of his time post-resurrection, pre-New 52 universe reboot.)

I don't really have anything concrete backing this up, just patterns I have noticed. I would love to know other people's thoughts.

Please God what is the connection between Danny phantom and batman in crying i just want to look at silly little batman posts why is the cartoon twink fucking Jason todd??????????