#i know i'm getting better bit by bit because it's increasingly annoying the shit out of me

[idvlover]

Hi! Can I have hcs with Naib, Luca and Wu Chang with a fragile s/o, like they want to become stronger but they need some help and lot of time.

Also I can send you some pictures of my shrimps (yes I have a aquarium with shrimps) if you want!!! (I don't know if shrimps are considered as pet).

I'm so sorry this took so long 😭

Naib, Wu Chang, and Luca with a fragile s/o who wants to be stronger:

Wu Chang:

Xie has always been trying to be careful with s/o during matches. Knowing that they aren't the strongest survivor, but they aren't the weakest either. Xie basically has a soft spot for them

Fan, on the other hand. Does not go easy on them like Xie does, but if his s/o really needs the break. He'll let them take a breather and change target

S/o was getting tired of struggling in so many matches, losing constantly, rinse, and repeat. Even if the match was a win, s/o was already back at the manor

So they went up to their lovers one day and asked for a custom match. Just the three of them

The two were confused but accepted

It was lost after loss again, and s/o was growing increasingly frustrated

Fan was actually the first one to put a halt to everything. Seeing that they were getting upset.

"Alright, something is the matter."

"I just wanted practice.."

"Practice until your knees break?"

When s/o explained everything, it made a lot of sense now

The two agreed to help them, but they help them through training methods and not just out right letting them wing it

Fan and Xie go outside of their abilities to give s/o harder courses. Which scared the shit out of them because the last thing they expected is for the two to full on SPRINT and also pull off some flexible moves

The worst one yet is when Fan was on the ceiling waiting for s/o to come through. He did that because he thought it was funny

When they get back out into the actual matches. S/o is doing much better than before

But when they enter duo's. It's a bit of a different story. Xie and Fan did teach them about getting through duo's by treating each other as different hunters than one. The only problem is that hunters like to target s/o for easy pickings and won't let up no matter what

Fan decided he wanted to be fully present in those matches rather than switch out. Not because he doesn't think s/o can't handle it, but he does not trust the other hunter to keep their cool when they realize s/o is not an easy grab anymore

There have been a few times when Fan had to fight a hunter. Those days are actually when he lets everyone win for the sake of not letting the hunter have satisfaction

Xie is very proud of s/o, though that some times he needed to be reminded that he needed to chair them, not let them kite him the entire match

Luca:

The strongest out of some of the decoders, considering his vaulting speed and pallet throws aren't slow. Average, but not slow either

He normally prefers to coordinate the match to help s/o stay in longer, such as carefully picking ciphers that aren't close to the hunter

This annoyed survivors some, but he didn't care honestly. With how some of them treat his s/o, he may or may not have led hunters to them and force them to take over kiting

His s/o asked him for help one day and told him that they wanted to learn how to kite better in matches. At first, he tried to direct them towards someone like Norton, Melly, or even Margie, or Patricia

Then they told him why they're asking him. He's fairly good at multi-tasking and knows all the best ways to lose a hunter when he is found first.

So, he begins helping them in custom matches with a hunter he trusts

It was really rough at first to the point that even the hunter was like: "Uh, I think they need a break. Like now."

Luca is trying to think of ways to teach them better because maybe the hunter isn't the best idea. So HE decides to pretend to be the hunter

He says shit like: "C'MERE PRETTY BOY/GIRL/DARLING!" While chasing them. He's also always yelling outta pocket shit

Yet this actually helped s/o improve significantly

So when Luca brings the hunter back, s/o is actually doing pretty well! Sure, they got captured once or twice, but they did really good!

Now, when the two go back in real matches. Luca tells them that if they need someone to take over, he won't mind kitting. They reassure him they'll be fine.

Boy, was everyone amazed with how well s/o was doing. All those months of practicing paid off. This made other survivors relieved as this means Luca won't lead the hunters to them anymore when he's mad at them

Naib:

Naib protects his s/o in matchs... CONSTANTLY. One of the reasons why s/o even makes it through a match

He's always next to them, working a cipher, taking over kites for them, taking hits for them, and will not hesitate to drag/carry their ass across the map to an open gate

Then his s/o asked him while they were getting ready to sleep one night if he could train them to do better in matches. He questioned them about it, and they gave a simple answer of wanting to be self-reliant when he's not in matches with them.

Which he finds understandable. So he agrees to it

And yes, he did use training military techniques on them. He was nicer about it, though... Unlike his trainers

He would also train with them. He wanted them to build up their lower and upper body strength before he had a hunter chase them

Naib is very encouraging about it. If they're starting to tire out, he'll encourage them to do two more then take a break

He also had them spare with him. They were super wobbly and unbalanced about it. He would give them tips on what to do and what not to do

He didn't exactly go easy on them when they were sparing, but he wasn't brutal. He will immediately stop if his s/o tells him to or if it's clear they are getting overwhelmed

When he finally let's them do a custom match. He is watching that hunter like a hawk. Doesn't matter how will known the hunter is known for friendliness he is making sure they don't fuck his s/o over

He coached them through those custom matches for months.

He may have probably trained them too well for any hunters liking because once they were back on the real matches, so many hunters would get frustrated and change target

Naib would praise them when he sees them at some point in the match

But, Naib still wants to decode next to them. Old habits die hard

He's still going to be protective no matter what. He adores his s/o too much. This also means he might watch them kite rather than decode

Helena literally dragged him away by the arm, telling him he needed to decode before crows appeared

[jadeylovesmarvelxo]

Steve harrington x reader

Steve won the poll last time so this is a Steve fic :) ❤️

Part one

You and Steve grow closer after he saved you from the monstrous bats, you begin to spend the night with him, no sex just comfort.

It doesn't take long for feelings to deepen between the two of you.

18+ minors go away.

❤️

The first night once Eddie left was horrendous, you were exhausted and hurting all over. After taking some pain meds you still couldn't sleep.

Every position hurt like a bitch, when you closed your eyes all you saw was those vicious bats, heard that shriek that would haunt you for months on end.

You could have died. If Steve hadn't turned up you would have and that thought has anxiety choking you, clawing at your throat and making it hard to breathe.

This continues the next night as well which leaves you and into the next. By the time it's Monday you're cranky, sleep deprived and in no mood for Eddie's continued annoyance at your moment with Steve.

"For goodness sake Eddie, would you cut this shit out. He saved my life, he's a good guy. Just drop it" Eddie quietens but still drums his fingers on the table, a habit of his when he's annoyed.

"Wow, someone is bitchy today" Stacy snipes and Eddie glares at her exasperated. Dustin said they had some kind of argument on Friday but you don't know about what, honestly you're sick of the drama from her.

"Sorry of lack of sleep from nearly being bat chow and finding a dead body is making me a little out of sorts" usually you ignore her itchiness but you aren't putting up with it today.

By the end of the day you're eager just to get home, have a shower and head to bed and attempt to relax, you're head is pounding and the wounds are still hurting from time to time.

You can't head home though because Hellfire has an extra meeting today and it's past five before it finishes. You're suprised to see Steve but remember he will be picking up Dustin, Lucas and Mike.

He walks over to you looking concerned, gently touching your shoulder.

"You okay? How are your wounds healing?" the way he cares about you, even though he barely knows you makes you feel all warm and happy.

"I'm okay, they still hurt but they are healing, are you okay?" he nods and shrugs like it's no big deal.

"I've had worse, it's the nightmares... He shudders, it's better now than it used to be but they can come back out of nowhere" you definitely can sympathise with him and find yourself telling him about your own nightmares.

As you do his frown grows increasingly and he runs his hand through his perfectly styled hair, he opens his mouth then pauses before speaking.

"If you want you could come to mine, my parents are never around and it gets lonely. We could watch movies, just hang out for a while. I don't want you to be alone in this sweetheart" you brighten at this and nod.

"I'd like that"

❤️

It was like a weight had been lifted of you when you were with Steve. Mostly you just talked and set up a den of sorts in his lounge. Blankets, snacks and movies.

Robin joins you and Steve for a little while and watching their affection for each other fills your heart with joy. You're pretty sure they are platonic soulmates or something.

You find yourself opening up more to Steve about your complicated feelings for Eddie, he confides in you about Nancy and it feels good to get a lot of things of your chest, things you could never say to Eddie in fear of ruining your friendship.

"The burden of unrequited love. Shit, we're hopeless aren't we" Steve jokes and you snort, you really were.

When you head upstairs with Steve to his room you're struck by how bare his room is, there's not many personal touches at all. It hurts your heart that his parents don't seem to care about him one bit, only sending home the latest fashion and pushing Steve to be like them.

He could never be like that, he was too warm, full of love. You're just getting to know him and you can see that, plus Dustin, Lucas and Mike worship him.

"Uh, I can sleep on the floor, you take the bed" Steve offers. As he makes up a bed on the floor you tug his hand gently.

"There's plenty of room, can you sleep beside me just for tonight" The minute you look at Steve with a pleading puppy eyed gaze he's putty in your hands.

"Sure" he slips in beside you and you just talk for a little bit, talk until you're both struggling to stay awake and Steve's voice is thick with sleep.

Your eyes grow heavier and you fall asleep, to your surprise it's peaceful and when you wake in the morning nightmare free you feel so full of relief.

Steve's arm is slung around your waist and pulling you close to him. It feels nice, really nice and you're happy to fall back into a deep slumber.

❤️

You don't know when it was suddenly decided that you would spend every night at Steve's. At first it was because Steve's parents were never around, he was lonely and craved company, while you craved comfort and you helped each other.

It's so you both didn't feel so alone in dealing with all this monsters and shit that were in Hawkins. There was no way those bats weren't from some sort of hell dimension, they weren't normal that was for sure.

When you were around Steve the nightmares weren't so vivid and frightening, you'd wake up beside Steve and his arms would instinctively wrap around you, holding you close and whispering that you were okay.

One time you sleep so well with Steve, that you wake up late for classes and you're in a rush to get to school.

Steve drives you and Robin, who woke the two of you up, the little smile she had on her face, seeing you and Steve entwined leaves no doubt she will be grilling Steve about it.

Steve who look pink cheeked and didn't notice, when you stole one of his grey hoodies to wear because it was freezing outside.

He's not the only one who notices, Eddie was curious why you were late and at lunch Dustin looks at you wide eyed and points to the hoodie. ''Hey, that's Steve's"

The whole of Hellfire turn to look at you with varying expressions. Jeff and Gareth uses it as ammo to tease the shit out of you, Eddie is stunned and the rest are more interested in the campaign to care.

"Wait so you're dating Steve now?" Mike asks confused and you shake your head, though the thought of dating Steve gives you butterflies, which you ignore. No way are you entertaining what that means.

So yeah Robin knows, and now Dustin and the rest of Hellfire are aware that you and Steve are close.

"So you sleep together but not actually together?" Eddie asks looking confused and a little suspicious when you explain that you're spending the night at Steve's again.

"I can't explain it Eddie, it's just really nice and comforting, he's turning into a great friend" you say and Eddie grumbles and slams his locker shut.

"You have me, you can confide in me. We used to have sleepovers and shit all the time" he points out and you stifle a smile.

"Eddie we were kids then and besides you have a girlfriend who wouldn't he happy with that" he sighs and shakes his head, the look in his eyes concerns you. Did something happen with Stacy?

"We broke up, she was just too jealous and possessive. Last I heard she's dating some dude from the swim team now. Anyway, can we get back to you and Harrington"

You sigh and know that no matter what you say it's just going to cause him to be annoyed because he can't see that Steve is a decent dude.

He gets distracted by Gareth asking questions about the campaign but his reaction to Steve and news about his break up with Stacy is in your head all day, strangely it doesn't fill you with the happiness you thought it would.

Steve comments on your head being in the clouds later that night while he's making dinner and you shrug apologetically and let him know what's happened.

"Eddie broke up with Stacy" he stops chopping vegetables and his stance is suddenly tense, his jaw clenched.

"Oh, yeah? I guess that makes you happy, I mean maybe the two of you might end up together" his voice turns quiet and you want to know why he's suddenly went so... well moody judging by the way he's acting.

"I thought that's what I wanted but now I'm not so sure" Steve turns to face you and he looks less tense this time.

"Thought Munson was your dream guy?" he teases and you really don't know what that is anymore. So when the image of Steve as that guy enters your mind it throws you for a loop.

Well fuck.

A few days later you lay beside Steve, very sleepy and keen to ignore the beeping of his alarm. Steve is awake and absentmindedly tracing your arm with his thumb.

He looks lost in thought and you gently nudge him wondering what's going on in his head.

"Are your scars healing well?" you nod and narrow your eyes at him, you know very well he will look after everyone else first and himself last.

"Are yours?" he nods and you pin him with your best stern gaze that makes him laugh.

"Yes. I promise sweetheart. Shit, Nance gave me a telling off last time when I didn't" this makes you bite back a laugh but you know Nancy takes no prisoners so Steve will have been well and truly chastised.

He tugs off his shirt to show you and you pause as you remember the last time you and Steve were like this. That kiss...

The kiss that was so chaste and lasted only a few seconds but made you eager for more, kinda punch drunk and giddy whenever you remember it.

You focus on his wound thats completely healed and left only a tiny scar. Ever so gently you trace over it and your heart beats faster when you hear Steve exhale, then you kiss the scar tenderly, a soft sweet kiss.

"All better" you murmur and scarper out of bed when you hear Robin downstairs. Pink blooms up Steve's cheek and there's an ache inside you that wants nothing more than to bridge the distance between you and Steve, kiss him again.

You really were screwed.

❤️

Steve had a date. The words ring in your ears and you try to hide your reaction from Robin but from the way she's staring at you, it's obvious she knows something.

You had shower up at Family Video eager to see Steve and discuss plans for tonight, maybe Robin could stay over and the three of you could make a night of it?

However when you bring this up to Steve he suddenly went really quiet and a strange pit filled your stomach.

"Uh, I can't tonight honey. I have a date, you know the blonde who comes in here every Thursday for 60's movies, well she asked me out"

The pit in your stomach intensifies and you nod feeling incredibly foolish.

"I can cancel, I mean if you think there's a reason why I shouldn't go" he says to you and you shake your head. No, you can't be selfish and want to have him all to yourself. Maybe he really liked this girl and she could make him happy.

"Don't be silly. Go and have fun. Don't worry about me" you force a smile onto your face, you wouldn't ruin his opportunity for happiness just so he could comfort you. You needed to deal with this yourself.

Was it just your imagination or did he look disappointed when you said that?

Before you can figure out why that is, the girl comes in and she's gorgeous. Tall, blonde and bubbly with killer blue eyes. There's a full ache in your heart as you greet her and find out she's called Emily and works at the arcades.

Quietly you slip out and leave Steve and Emily to bond. All the way home you feel sick to your stomach, the realisation that you've fallen hard for Steve sinks in.

And he doesn't feel the same way.

❤️

It's getting pretty late once you finish watching one of the films you've rented. Its past midnight and you're eyes grow heavy sleep beckoning.

The doorbell rings and you jump, it's unexpected and you never have visitors at this time.

When you find Steve waiting outside you're definitely surprised.

"Steve? How was your date?" he shakes his head and you worry that it hasn't went well.

"What happened?" you motion for him to come inside and he shrugs off his jacket, then turns to you his smile tender, his soft gaze makes your heart skip a beat.

"She was great, she's sweet, pretty" of course she was perfect. Perfect for Steve, you smile brightly even if you don't feel so chirpy.

"That's great Steve" his hazel eyes capture yours and he shrugs, the intensity in his gaze is making you feel all fuzzy.

"Really? Doesn't feel that great, I should be happy but I wasn't because all I can think about is you"

Hope blooms as you take in his words and move closer to him. His knuckles graze gently across your cheek, you lean into his touch and he looks at you with complete adoration.

"You're amazing, you're beautiful and kind, I can't stop thinking about you" He pulls your closer to him and kisses you, elated you kiss him back and run your hands through his hair.

Soft moans issue from your throat and he pulls back smiling, then presses a gentle kiss to your forehead.

"You wanna be my girl?" he asks you and there's a shyness in his tone which is very endearing.

"I'd love to Steve"

Fin 💕

[ohgodmyeyes]

Hi dad... im 20 and trans in the us and i have no idea what to do with myself... ive heard from family up in canada that things are also bad there... im just so scared how are you coping? i dont know what to do and dont really have anyone else to talk to in my family theyre all hardcore trump supporters. sorry for telling you all this i just dont know where else to turn... i hope youre well though despite everything happening right now

hey! ❤️ I'm almost 40 and definitely-not-cis, and I'm not sure what to do with myself either. we've got a jerk up here who's itching to call an election and try to form his very own ass-kissing Vichy knockoff just in time to roll out the red carpet for Leon Cocksucker and his new Führer; conservative premiers (provincial governors) have already been testing the waters re: health care and bodily autonomy; and at all levels of government, they're threatening to invalidate our charter rights via the abuse of a heretofore rarely-used mechanic intended solely for emergencies.

i genuinely believed that this was all going to turn out differently, but it hasn't, and facism spreads a lot like a cold. Canada likes to pretend to be cool but really we're just an annoying little sibling... which our collective behaviour tends to reflect, oftentimes not for the better.

by Canadian standards I'm kind of garbage, but by global standards my life is pretty charmed; i've known for a long time that it wasn't entirely sustainable, but i genuinely didn't believe I'd have the rug pulled out from under me quite like this. in retrospect i've been watching it happen my whole life, but the recent acceleration has been really — well, not surprising, but... it's been something.

anyway, i'm going on — what I really meant to say was "holy shit I'm sorry you're stuck with people like that" and "please focus on keeping yourself safe, because that has just become your primary obligation". not that it was a picnic before, but being trans just got a lot more difficult. it was supposed to "get better" — but frankly it hasn't; not meaningfully, and i'm horrified that we've let it get this bad.

not that it can't get better again — but we kind of all dropped the ball (i mean us oldish people especially), and now we have to pick up again. print out and save gay and trans stories; write down your own stories; research the past and preserve it for as long as it's available to you. strike a balance between being safe and being yourself, because while visibility just became more dangerous, it also just became that much more important.

months ago, i took my pride pin off of my bag; i hated doing it, but people are becoming increasingly abrasive, and (selfishly, certain caveats notwithstanding) I didn't want to attract any negative attention. i regret that decision now, for as much fuss as it might have spared me, and so i think I might consider putting it back on soon. maybe that will be part of coping; maybe it will help someone; maybe it will be ineffective or even harmful... but like you, I'm not sure what else to do right now. not in light of what's just happened.

things had already been a bit tough, and this isn't exactly helping, but knowing that i'm not alone in grieving what we've lost counts for something. i'm bad at people (VERY bad, like disability-cheque-bad), but none of us can afford to be an island anymore... so i actually can't thank you enough for reaching out. you've probably helped me more than I've helped you, but i hope there's something in this that resonates and makes you feel less alone anyway... because you're not, not at all, even though i'm sure it feels like it in the midst of that hellscape.

i'm going to go watch star wars now, maybe write something... but i'm still here.

someone smart once told me that if it isn't okay, then it just means it isn't over yet. i believe them. we'll make it because we have to; what other choice do we have?

[khiphop-discussions]

RAP:PUBLIC Ep.5 Part 1 Thoughts

The infamous Titanic episode of Rap:Public! Episode 5! I'm clearly not gonna finish this tonight but spoilers anyway.

We're starting off at the last 2 teams of the block breaker mission. 2 vs 3. Team Loopy vs Team Haon.

Loopy is such a good leader.

Haon too. He's a bit more relaxed.

Reddy volunteers to be up for elimination but I'd actually be more annoyed if I was one of the less experienced rappers because if I get voted into the deathmatch then It'll be harder to beat Reddy than similarly inexperienced rappers. Like, you're not actually saving anyone from being thrown in? And like I said last episode, throwing your best rappers into elimination just isn't smart. It's not in the best interest of them in the event you lose.

Oh shoot...is the deathmatch team vs team? I thought it was the 3 teammates face each other to see who leaves? Oh shit...maybe I misunderstood lol. If so I take the last part back lol

Loppy first let's see if Haon comes out. Damn, Loopy didn't even feel the need to take his hand out his pocket lol. Haon didn't come out but Yang Kyle did. Nice to finally see his rap. Nice! I like it.

I think...this is hard but Loopy got it. Loopy won it but respect for Kyle on my end!

Yunha is good but Loopy is better. Khan is enjoying the song but Shyboiitobii was like "he isn't from our block" pulled him back lol.

Yunha won. Idk if anyone left on block 2 can beat Haon. Even Yunha alone is pretty strong. Yunha touches shyboii. He turns away from the camera and pushes his hair back. He seemed upset (I could be misreading of course). Remember on ep.1 when he was upset Mason Home touched him? He seems like he has a thing about that even during the "game play" (valid of course, I bring this up because Yunha was clearly being playful but Shy still is allowed to not like that regardless of being for entertainment or play).

Anyway, nosun comes out and he's good. He beats Yunha. But like Punchnello said, I think they both deserved the win.

I like this verse from Nosun. Osun comes out and faces him. Osun's isn't fitting the beat as well as Nosun. He's talented but its not fitting. He goes up to Shy during his rap. Shy looks PISSED! Even Khan asked "Did it make your blood boil?" Tobi turned around for a bit but turned back around when khan asks. He smiles (very forced) and says "hmmm". Even Marv is like "why do people only attack him?" They must know/think that he's a hot head? Maybe they think he's weak or something? (Many people take shyness/quietness for weakness). Maybe they're trying to bait him thinking they can beat him? Idk.

Anyway, nosun won as expected. Next round, Nosun has so many nice lyrics haha. Dommiu is dope! She messes up a bit though. But even without Nosun was still a bit better. Maybe on a different beat she'd have won. Polodared votes for her (she really pretty and cute! But regardless she's talented) but it's 43 to 1.

They're showing so many shots of tobii flipping his hair back out of his face. Lol Rap:Public's visual!

Reddy goes up. He's good but Idk if the energy is there. It's obvious he's more experienced and stable. Nosun hugs him at the beginning and end. Very honored to be facing Reddy it seems. Reddy won. 27 to 17. Nosun hugs him again!

Seems Khan will go up next. Reddy shakes hands with him. Lots of respect to and from Reddy it seems. Khan has energy but it doesn't seem like people liked it. So he'll likely lose. He did.

Reddy's energy seems to keep increasing every round! Ga yeon comes out but I don't think she'll win. I like her style though. Reddy win.s.

Reddys raps keep getting increasingly better but I guess it makes sense since hes choosing the beat now. Shyboii comes out but puts his hood on. I don't think he'll win. But randomly putting the hood on gives "Ash turning his hat around before the pokemon battle" vibes. It looked really cool lol.

Reddy wins. Shyboii says he's disappointed in himself. yukon comes out to face reddy but messes up. Reddy wins.

Raf goes up. He rides the beat well. Really cool. Both did a more "cool" type of vibe. Raf was able to beat out Reddy. I don't think he can beat Haon though.

Bbulkup was doing strong when he came out but messed up seconds into his rap. He probably could have won without that.

Raf is different cause he can outcool everyone. Even when he's putting in a lot of effort he still comes of cool and laid back. Most people can only do one or the other. Idk about this onem everybody is saying Haon had a short verse. This one will be close. Actually nah, raf won by a lot.

James is good. He kinda sounds like Swings. I think he won. Block 2 celebrated too early. Yeah, James won so now 1v1

Wally is last. His is melodic so different from James. He fits the beat better tbh. I think Wally got it but it's CLOSE.

Xwally won it. So block 2 wins. That one was crazy though.

So all together block 2, 4, 6, and 7 won 10,000

The leaders have to tell them who they chose to do the deathmatch.

Fleeky Bang (block 1) chose: Goldbuuda, Kang Hyuk, Jeffrey White

Gamma (block 8) chose: Churry, Leo, Bizzy(Huh? Did he volunteer? I don't remember). He says he chose who he thought would do poorly the next round.

Haon (block 3) chose: James An, Yang Kyle, and Reddy.

JP (block 5): Hash Swan, Mckdaddy, Mason Home. Apparently, Mason Home told JP he wants to get eliminated. And yes, it seems like the deathmatch IS team vs team so Haon WAS smart to choose his strongest people. My bad I TOTALLY misunderstood the rule. I thought every team who lost would HAVE to eliminate 1 person based on who performs the worst. They face people on their SAME team to decide who leaves or stays. Oops.

They have to perform without music.

Haon seems like he's taking the deathmatch HARD! He's really upset.

They gave them suitcases to repack?...the stuff already in suitcases? I don't get it?

Anyway, it's 12 here now! I'm 1 hour in exactly. I'll pick this up soon but likely not tomorrow. We'll see!

[basedkikuenjoyer]

A very cool one to finally check off the list. I have been familiar with Serial Experiments Lain since I first got into anime fandoms in the early 00s. Even had the first DVD volume in my collection. But there was always other stuff I wanted to finish more and I felt like I got the basic idea enough to like, recognize when something else was referencing it. Know a lot of people who'd call it their favorite and it was easily one of the most influential anime of the 90s.

And now I've finished it. Series is kinda infamous for being hard to really summarize but the gist of it is we start on a schoolgirl committing suicide. Her classmates get emails from her after. One quiet girl Lain gets sucked into the digital world as a result. Shit gets weird. Really weird. Truth be told, the plot is secondary to a lot of cool aesthetic choices and ruminations on the growing relevance of computers and networking technology in society. Coming out in the late 90s, Serial Experiments Lain deserves its modern reputation for being prescient about that. Seeing it properly start to finish today though? What are my thoughts with the lens of hindsight?

It's...quaint. Might sound like I'm trying to be edgy saying that but at about the halfway point that's all I could think. Because it kinda feels like we're coming out the other side. There's a reason a series like Frieren, advertising itself from the jump as after the journey, has been such a blazing wildfire recently. I might have some criticism of specific "discourses" or whatever but on the whole you are seeing something shift as Zoomers take the stage. I think that'll click about the halfway point there. The oldest there by any definition are still under 30 and all. There's only so much culture can reflect your impact...but the more I see that taking shape the more I see the balance emerging. Y'all don't have that little shred of entitlement my generation has from growing up in "good times" so when you get a little older and learn how much you can influence things more locally...y'all like, do it instead of coming up with a bunch of excuses.

Point being, that's kinda how Lain feels watching it today. I've watched us go through the peak of prescience, circa 2014, and then it went supernova, and now we have a world where Facebook is increasingly a graveyard of AI comments under AI images. That specific example of the dead sending messages through the wires...yeah it's an annoying nuisance spam bot spoofing. Social media is a ticking time bomb, advertisers are gonna catch on. Not to go all Dead Internet Theory and all, but it has hit a point a good chunk of it is fake.

Meanwhile a site that tried to keep a bit of the old Internet alive like Tumblr is having a Renassiance. When you grew up with the Internet, you gained that resistance because the worst aspects of its impact were limited by the technology. Now people are learning how to compartmentalize it better. Nostalgia for the days of the corner computer desk reflects that.

Lain was kinda creepy and weird and thought-provoking in 2004 when I first saw a bit of it. But in 2024? This oddly nostalgic comfort food show. And I know that doesn't apply equally because Paranoia Agent is something I have more nostalgia for and it still hits that unsettling tone. I think the difference is Lain using high tech aesthetics so much whereas...you could kinda do Paranoia Agent in any era.

[dragonfireandice]

.

I am so FUCKING TIRED OF EVERYTHING. Fuck. My partner realizes what an absolute bastard he's been to me increasingly across the relationship, to the point where he himself describes his actions as abusive, and he wants to get his shit straight, because he treasures me, because I am the best fucking thing in his life, and he lost sight of that. That I don't deserve any of the treatment I've gotten and he needs to resolve several issues so he doesn't lash out like that. He recognizes that I've put up with shit no one else would, that I would always be in the right for leaving him if I did.

I feel a tiny bit hopeful. I tell him that the only reason we're still together is because I'm trying to get financially stable so we can have that conversation. So I can lay out the reality of what the consequences of his actions, inactions, and irresponsiblities are.

He wants to do better.

We have a good day.

And then because I don't agree with his wanton desire to throw everything away, including things I've purchased, he decided to say some unnecessary shit to ramp up my stress before bed.

"Why was that necessary?" "I guess because I was annoyed with you."

Thanks. THANKS. Nevermind that neither of us have been getting the best sleep lately, nevermind that my sleep has been worse than yours, but you don't care because you have a job and I have the "luxury" of trying to get more, like I'm some spoiled, pampered princess who doesn't do anything.

Nevermind everything I do that goes unappreciated and unseen.

Nevermind that I am exhausted physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Nevermind that I have to get passionately incensed for you to take me even slightly seriously. That I have to fight for my voice to be heard.

Nevermind what I'm going through, my stress, my existence.

Just keep dumping your problems on me, the violent intrusive thoughts you refuse to do anything about, the standards you're frustrated you can't keep so you give me shit for it instead, the insecurities you could solve literally just by reaching out to your friends instead of talking about them behind their back, the s*icidal ideation, the anger, the frustrations, the unrealistic expectations, the manic epiphanies, everything you should bring to a therapist but won't.

And when I'm not okay? When I need help? Keep that general lack of empathy and care coming. It's great.

Why do you think I don't ask you for help anymore?

I ask and don't get it.

I ask and get treated like a child, like I'm the lesser part of the relationship because I need help.

I'm just your emotional punching bag.

And I am so, so tired.

I know I deserve better. I know I've put up with so much I shouldn't have. I know the rose tinted lenses were on too tight for too long.

If you want to change, I need to see it, really see it, I can't keep doing this all talk and no walk routine. I have so little left to give you.

I know this was one thing. Maybe even one little thing to you. I know I gave you shit for it last night and we talked it through. But it's one more thing on top of a mountain of other things. I need the walk. I need the action. I can't keep doing this. I thought for a second I might not need it, but we're back on track to have that conversation once my financial situation is better.

I'm so tired.

[pentagonieslut]

Obstacle

song title series number two !!

song: Obstacle - KARRA

mv at the bottom of the drabble

readerxlune, gn!reader x lune, jung sungmin, lune, dkb, obstacle, heartbroken!reader, shittybf!lune, asshole!lune, emotional!reader

“you’re an obstacle i got to climb.”

lune is shitty and you let it slide. but when you end it to keep your sanity and he comes crawling back? what happens? stream obstacle by karra.

"going through the motions, don't wanna pretend i'm alright." you had said as your friends nodded in response and rubbed your arms in comfort. you had ended it with lune after he thought it'd be fun to cheat right then and there at the party.

he even gave you a nasty look and told you to go away. and all those years you had spent together. asshole.

your friends had encouragingly forced you out the house to cheer up and dance the night away to feel better. even you, the person who had the hottest body out of your friend group felt horrible and ugly in the outfit they had chosen despite it being the top ten in sexy from your closet. "i don't wanna do this tonight." you had said softly as mira shook her head and pushed you inside the club.

to be honest you were enjoying it a bit. you had let loose a bit and even had a few drinks bought for you.

..okay too much fun.

your eyes were puffy from all the crying you did again and the late night. with the hoodie over your head, you made your way to the convenience store and grabbed a basket, going through the aisles slowly, picking up this and that for you to eat and continue your lonely breakup playlist party. "why are you hiding behind the hoodie?" lune had asked as you blinked a bit and noticed the tall male in front of you. "i feel better about my appearance. why are you here, sungmin?" you asked as you went around him and grabbed several bowls of ramen. "to talk and make up." "i'm dumb enough to pretend the first time and i'll believe it over and over again. that you love only me and were 'doing it for a dare with the guys'-- bullshit." you spat as your grabbed a couple of hotdog (called sausage sticks in Korea) sticks and threw them in your increasingly heavy basket.

“no i wasn’t going to use that excuse baby. i promise. i was going to explain and be honest.” lune said quickly as he stepped in front of you. “you’re just an obstacle i got to climb if i don’t crawl to go to the other side.” you spoke as you went around and continued getting the rest of your stuff, checking out and making your way back to your memoria shithole apartment. his stuff is still there.

“baby. what happened that night was just drunk dumb fucks who mistook the other for their lover. honest.” you cackled and raised a brow, looking at sungmin in amusement. he really thinks you’re a dumb bitch. “that’s not what last summer says.” “last summer days me getting her to leave you alone!”

lune had followed you back to the apartment and stood in front of the door. you were becoming annoyed at him and rolling your eyes. “you’re impossible. i know what i have is the truth because i’m the one who took the photos.” lune was shocked but quickly recovered.

he wasn’t expecting the bombshell of how it got leaked. he also was mentally shitting himself for taking you for granted. not even his pretty face could get you this time. but it wasn’t going to get him to stop. he was determined to get you back and get more poker chips when he went gambling.

“sungmin. move away from the door.” he stood firm and you growled. “get out of my way.” “no. not until you listen and take me back.” “that’s never happening ever again. now get out of my way bitch.” you screamed as lune sighed and walked away.

eight doors opened immediately and the boys poked their heads out. “what happened? are you okay?” they chorused unintentionally, causing you to wipe your tears and laugh in the fast bear group hug. “he’s just an obstacle.”

[welcometogrouchland]

Hey dude I totally know how you feel wrt feeling like shit when people are negative about your hyperfixation. It really is the worst. I hope you can take some time to chill on your own today and take it easy, and hopefully things will get a bit better soon

Aw, first of all, thank you sm!! - the days almost up where I am but I think I'm gonna be indulging in a lot of creature comforts these next few days as I try to meet my deadlines and get through things. Lots of comfort movies and hot water bottles 💙

Second of all, RIGHT?! IT'S THE WORST MAN!!! I was thinking about the latest owl house episode when I wrote those tags because the thing is, I don't think it's perfect and i outlined my thoughts on why shortly after it aired, but overall I wanted to focus on the parts of the episode I did like because. That's fun for me! And easy! And I want fandom to be a fun and easy hobby like most people! But engaging with stuff outside my bubble has been more angst than it's worth, y'know? Obviously I don't think anything is immune to criticism and I think there's a line between things that need to be discussed at some point in order to have a full, informed picture of the work and it's flaws but then there's just. People being annoying in tags.

Again I can't tell if it's me being too autistic for this stuff, being too emotionally burnt out to process external criticism of things I love, or if it's just me getting increasingly more pissed off with a lack of understanding of who's in what tags and why (something I'm sure has always existed and factored into fandom discussion and discourse but which I'm getting a lot more often rn bc of the things I like and the communities that attracts. Aka cartoon twitter /j). Frankly the amount of disclaimers I've put in this unsolicited rant just shows how getting your interests constantly dunked on makes you insecure about them. I will say though that I am really lucky to have irl friends who also share my interests. It's new and weird and I love it.

Sorry for the rant, thought dumping is just therapeutic for me sometimes. I hope you have a good day too <3

[black-occamy]

Bit of a rant coming. I used to like prongsfoot (found it mildly interesting and still follow some blogs) but as a hardcore jily fan I'm finding that part of the fandom increasingly annoying because of the people implying prongsfoot is closer to canon than it actually is. It's of course completely fine to like a noncanon ship! What I don't get is how they can act superior for shipping something that "respects canon" 🤣 without acknowledging James loved Lily and only Lily in that way. Of course #notallprongsfootshippers but it's something I've noticed lately. Also like you said a lot of it seems to be a reaction to wolfstar. Idc that much about wolfstar (similar to prongsfoot, just mildly interesting) but it bothers me when the things they use to put that ship down is downplaying their friendship or saying things like: Sirius would never forgive Remus for X. For example, 'leaving' him in Azkaban. Because in the books they do address this exact thing and they literally hug it out and choose to forgive each other. So much for respecting canon Sirius!

I hear you, Nonny. I think there is a lot of truth to the fact that the attitude of "I know best and ONLY my ship is right and true, and nothing else matters" is what is eventually triggering for a lot of people, who would have otherwise be able enjoying it.

There is a whole world of difference between enjoying the ship (whatever it is) and putting that ship on pedestal for any reason, while simultaneously either dismissing others or trying to spit venom on those who dare to ship differently.

Ultimately fandom wars have frighteningly a lot in common with religious wars - either is relying on the "I think my shtick is better than yours and I'm willing to kill you for it" - at least metaphorically.

While I can do little about religion in the real world, however, I sure as hell can remind all the fandom people to just... Like and let like. Ship and let ship. And don't shit on others in the meantime 🤷🏻‍♀️

[live-love-laugh-lesbian]

HIII this is probably gonna be the last ask i send as your swiftie exchange anon haha! also i dont know what timezone you are but ive scheduled it for 6am gmt for tomorrow if i remember correct skdkekdfk (but also you said quid which means pounds i think so im taking a wild guess that you are somewhat the same timezone as me haha)

yep im in uni! honestly kinda harsh kakdkekxfj ive got tests on the first week back but i suppose that's to ne expected haha! it is quite stressful but like c'est la vie yk? good luck on your exams!!

oh also im so glad youre feeling better!! i hope you feel awesome soon!

oh yeahh that makes complete sense! you dont have to show them to me if you dont want to btw but once i reveal myself and you are okay w it you can dm me! (only if you want tho no pressure at all!!)

yeahh thats so real actually! people always want what they dont have and that makes me kinda sad but also im one of those people so ajdeksjd i cant really say anything abt it akfkekdjf

yeahh hypocrisy is so linked like to everyday stuff!! and what you said makes more sense than what i ever couldve ajdjejsjfn and inflation is HORRIBLE ive witnessed price of stuff like cheese go up by so much and it appals me! and that is a ridiculous difference from your phone bill!

oohh i wish i was you id love to meet my online friends!!

yeah!! like the main problem with fast fashion isnt the cheap quality (i mean perhaps it is) but also the PEOPLEEEE WHO BARELY GET PAIDD!!

thats such a thought out and good answer!! climate change and the way politicians handle shit is so real like it NEEDSS to be addressed!! and i hope you get to see your doctors!!

and same im such a pushover like i wish i could not be but alas it is but a dreamm!! i think for me what you said is basically my answer and like people being assholes and thinking theyre funny? lile people who think its okay to make offensive jokes or say a slur bc they think theyre funny annoys me soo bad!!!!! and also people who manipulate other people like ewwww and just like horrible people in general. also thats horrible!! why does anyone think its okay to do that???

hmm... honestly rename strawberries fluffleberries and making bananas rainbow sounds like an awesome idea sjdjekdn hmm this is hard kakdkdskf maybe i would replace car honks with goose honks hehe i feel like thats such a silly answer but tbf i am but a silly goose!! what about you?

and my question to you: what are some things you are grateful for (see i say things not people bc i feel like people is a very general question ajfjrjdjf but you can tell me people too if you want!!)

thank youu!! i had an awesone time chatting with you you're lovely <3

have an awesome day!!!

-swiftie spring exchange anonnnnn

Hello! My country change timezones slightly I think based on clocks, but I think we're currently BST? I can never remember, a bit embarrassing imo XD It's cool that we might be close in time zones!!

Ah I have no exams cause I'm not in uni, but I am tutoring kids for exams so does that count? XD I hope your tests go well!!

Cheap quality sucks, but it'd improve if companies were willing to give up just a teeny tiny bit of their profits...I've become so increasingly anti company over the last like 5 years I think XD And thank you!! Honestly the "offensive is funny" type is SO annoying. I've met a few that were like "uhhh it's dark humour" and I've been like. You do not have dark humour, you just want to be rude.

I did however get a cookie once from a guy who realised that I had been upset by his stupid joke (I can't remember what exactly it was, but I think it was like...either homophobic or misogynistic. The apology was nice to get because it was unexpected. Alas at the time I was unable to eat gluten so the cookie part was awkward.) And manipulation just sucks?? I feel like people get away with it a lot because it's not obviously awful until you realise what's going on.

Silly answers are encouraged for that one!! (And always tbh) XD And honestly I would get rid of sparkling water. I feel like it's like marmite - people love it or hate it. And I hate sparkling water, I literally cannot handle the texture. And one time I accidentally got some instead of regular water. The memory haunts me. So yeah I'd wind up half the world by getting rid of it altogether and just watch the chaos XD

My final answer (also I know who you are now cause of when I logged on BUT I'm gonna answer this anyways on here) would be my cats (haha not people so they slip through...not things either but not people), the way life has turned out (it's not perfect, but I'm in a much better position than I ever expected even just like 2 years ago), and my art abilities (because I like that I can draw, and draw pretty decently, it's a fun and usually relaxing hobby!)

I had the time of my life answering questions with you, and I look forwards to hopefully talking more with you!!

[lovecolibri]

SaL anon here friend and well, we knew this week would be grim but I wasn't expecting last night's truly spectacular level of stupid. KR really is going the full RNM with "you know what this character needs? to regress!! for the drama...". It seems her true talent lies in finding new and increasingly annoying ways to employ guest actors. Also who wrote this lady's dialogue, how did they not cringe when they edited it? Anywho, tonight's LS isn't looking much better since its combining two of my most loathed Owen storylines, his LI and distinctly-not-firefighting-related detective work. Yay. At least Paul will get some screen time out of it. We're not even at the wishing luck on episodes stage anymore, its just pure "let's hope we don't do permanently damage to our liver getting through this". Anyway cheers bestie, here's to all the amazing fic writers (yourself included!) who manage to find ways to fix this shit into something sensible 🍷🍷🍷.

Bestie that was some of the biggest cringe-fail interactions I've seen in a looooong time. (Oliver, blink twice if you're bombing your chemistry with these potential love interests on purpose, we won't tell anyone, promise!) And even besides the lack of chemistry nothing about this character worked. Oh, we need a character who helps the elderly and dying find peace? Maybe you shouldn't have a bright-eyed bushy-tailed youngster who acts like she's never met someone who has been clinically dead before? Maybe have someone with an ounce of empathy who doesn't treat someone's death experience like a sideshow when they're clearly uncomfortable and barely able to get the words out? IDK that whole conversation was so icky to me. And I *might* could go with it as intentional if it wasn't for the cemetery scene and kr banging on about Buck continuing this pursuit for the next several episodes. I have always loved Buck even in his awkward moments because he always felt genuine and earnest, but that cemetery scene felt like someone shoving words into his mouth to push the idea of this new relationship, and completely disregarding Buck as a character and his other relationships in the process. Another instance of kr twisting characters around to fit a plot idea instead of allowing the characters to drive the plot and actually move forward. At least Madney are still cute and funny even if their storyline is kinda trash too. And don't get me started on the stuff with Shannon. At least we have the sperm donor mess, L return, and a possible tay kay jumpscare to look forward to! 🙄🙄🙄

As for LS, I'm just ready to mindlessly stare at the tv for an hour, have a chuckle or two, and then erase every pointless bit of Owen from my brain.

Cheers my friend, we are gonna need it! Also, I maaaaay be working on a fic. An AU not fix-it, but I'm pretty excited about the idea (SaL based, of course) and some of the things I've come up with for it (suuuuper stoked personally for how I worked the chapter titles because I think I'm clever), so hopefully I can work on that and get something to tease soon!

[notasapleasure]

This 'super cold' is really just like....a fortnight (at least) of SYMPTOMS roulette. Start off with a fever and deep brain fog? Ok good, and we add...*spins wheel* muscle cramps today! Starting to get over that, huh? How about *spins wheel* nausea! Are you gonna throw up? Are you not? What will make it happen? Sitting perfectly still? Attempting to eat? Turning your head the wrong way too fast? Ok ok next! *spins wheel* Ah, a good old fashioned cough, at least now you feel like you have a cold, right? *spins wheel* keep coughing bitch *spins wheel* keep coughing *spins wheel* oh now your intercostal muscles hurt so much you're gonna throw up if you keep coughing! *spins wheel* yeah you ain't done with that fatigue and brain fog yet get back on the couch *spins wheel* headaches! Haven't done that one for a few days! *spins wheel* getting tired yet? Oh look your throat's all swollen up! *spins wheel* nvm swellings gone down before you could get a GP appointment. Now the GP looks at you in exasperation and says 'yes but what symptoms do you have?' and your mind goes blank because....like...all of them? In no particular order? But it's ok, it's not covid, go home and take it easy. But I've finished all the series of Monty Don's gardens. I've watched all the nature documentaries. I read The Right to Sex cover to cover. I want to write, I want to learn my vocab lists and commiserate with my Georgian friends about their election results and I need to do some work, shit I need to go to town and get my brother and my oldest friend a birthday present, but instead I'm hobbling from the sofa to bed and back again going stir crazy.

[laladellakang]

HELLO, I was thinking and, what if (in a time when everyone is older:3) Della is pregnant but I don't know it, but the members do, so they notice how her belly grows but she thinks she's getting fat and starts to do diets and extreme exercise? One day her members see her hit her stomach because she can't lose weight, how would they react? ( Hajun is on his way ;) )

hi! you accidentally sent this four times so i’m just gonna answer to your first one 😁 plus i personally feel uncomfortable writing the hit part so i am not gonna include that

tw: weight gain, pregnancy, mentions of diet and vomiting

ksn heavy

— a couple of years into the future —

"Shit," Sunoo mumbled under his breath. "Lala!" he rushed to her side.

Della was sat down in front of a mirror, crying her eyes out. Usually she wouldn't care if she gained weight or had a bit of belly fat (she likes it, even) she would always just eat a bit better and exercise it off.

She thought that that was the case, yet it wouldn't go away at all.

She became increasingly frustrated. She started actually dieting and working out like crazy, which led to her vomiting a couple of times but she thought 'so be it.'

Everyone's watching the group closely. This is the group's first Japanese comeback since the wedding (and second comeback overall), so they need to prove that they're still the same Enhypen- if not, better.

"Why won't it go away?!" she ran a hand through her hair, "We only have a week lef-"

"It doesn't matter, Della. It's okay," Sunoo grabbed her face to caress and wipe the tears.

The boys knew of her weight loss plan but they just let her be. They were going through the same thing and as long as she still eats three actual meals a day, they thought she would be fine.

"My abs wouldn't come back! And most of my outfits will be crop tops, Sunoo!" she said frustratingly.

"But Lala, look!" he turned her to the mirror. "Flex," he gestured to her arms. "See! Look at how crazy your muscles look! Your leg muscles too, even!"

"But my belly!" she cried out, wrapping her arms around his neck.

Something suddenly hit Sunoo as she kept sobbing.

"Lala, sweetie? Can I ask you something?" Della sniffled before nodding. "Have you taken a pregnancy test?"

Della froze for a moment. She forgot she had removed her IUD. They agreed to start trying after their (Korean) comeback. It would also explain the vomiting.

"Holy shit! Sunoo-ya! We have to get to the hospital! Tell the others!”

❅◦❆◦❅◦❆◦❅◦❆◦❅◦❆

"Remember a couple of years ago when you were annoyed that the 02z didn't aim at the drain? Now that you know that there's actually a chance for you to be pregnant, you don't realise it."

Well she's pregnant, alright. So she cried all the way home because she felt horrible. She couldn't even be joyed at the news while the boys were ecstatic and panicky at the same time.

She did all those practices, workouts and diets while pregnant? Good thing the doctor said the baby was perfectly fine. They also said she needed to rest as much as possible so they're gonna take some time off after promotions.

"I've never been pregnant before!" the news finally struck the girl. "Jesus Christ, I'm pregnant.." she let out a small smile while placing a hand on her stomach. "A person is growing inside of me."

"Really- congratulations guys," their manager said as he was driving. "Take it easy, okay? I've informed the higher ups and we'll have a meeting tomorrow."

"See? Take it easy," Heeseung turned to look at Della with a mild glare. "Don't dance too hard."

"Good thing it's a Japanese promotion," Jay sighed. "Like ten schedules and that's it."

"Hyung, who do you think the dad is?" Sunghoon asked out of nowhere. His competitive side is showing.

"Ew, no-"

"Between the 02z!" Jake added.

"What?! I don't know!"

"Try making a guess, hyung," Niki grinned mischievously.

"They're gonna ask everyday if you don't," Jungwon said while gesturing to his hyungs.

"I can't believe we didn't settle this with rock, paper, scissors," Sunoo mumbled before nuzzling his face in Della's neck. Heela, being the only two who heard, laughed at the comment.

"I don't know! Jay?!"

"Hell yeah! One point for Park Jongseong!"

taglist! @afiaaaa19 @1-800-enhypennabi @one16core @ilyxion @toriluvsfics @i90snoo @danyxthirstae01 @seulgifted @clar-iii @hiqhkey​ @nichmeddar @jiwlys @duolingofanaccount [@studioreader @sarang-wonie @fairydosii @hoonstrology @jaetint]

[scandalsavagefanfic]

Hello! I am a huge fan of ur writing. I've loved everything I've read of yours. I've read alot of what you've posted, except for a couple of the tags that are squicky for me (so I'm very thankful you tag very thoroughly). No judgement for the squick, it's just not for me. & when I'm having a bad day, I usually just go thru ur ao3 and find something to reread. I think about Therapy's Bruce & Jason every damn day. While I obvs appreciate ur darker more "problematic" content (I really vibe with some of the themes you write about bc of my own trauma, & so it's very cathartic to read about in a fictional setting), I am truly a sucker for ur more happy content. The Happily Ever After verse also lives in my head rent free. Idk more wholesome stuff just seems more special when you write it. Anyways. I would die for you. But the point of this ask is cause I'm curious as to why you don't like Urban Legends? I'm sorry if you already talked about it here or on twitter and I missed it. I was just wondering because I really enjoy your take on things and would love to hear why you dislike it. I've been enjoying it so far personally, but I am always open to DC comics criticism.

Aw thank you so much! I'm so flattered by everything you just said. You're so sweet ❤❤❤❤❤

I haven't talked about Urban Legends here or twitter (I haven't been very active in either place lately. Just a lot going on and no energy 😔) but I'm happy to do it here.

Before I start though, I just want to add a standard disclaimer and make it clear that if you like it, there's nothing wrong with that and you don't have to let me ruin it for you lol. Like what you like.

That said, since you asked...

I said this when I was talking about it on discord, that there is a difference between hope and expectation. I always hope that a new story centered on Jason (or anyone really, but things have been especially egregious for Jay for 15 years) will be good or at least treat the character with a minimal level of respect (to be honest, the bar is super fucking low). But my expectations always temper my hope, to keep it from getting unrealistic. Because my expectations are based on experience.

The long history of Jason Todd, since even before his resurrection, has been one of retroactively trying to make him "a bad seed" in order to absolve Bruce of any responsibility in his death.

I don't even expect DC or their writers to start honoring the fact that Jason was not an angry, reckless Robin (and less of the later than Dick or Tim and definitely Damian). There plenty of ways that retcon can be folded into his history and be compelling and sympathetic. And if they're going to stick with that retcon, I'm only asking that they do it in one of those compelling and sympathetic ways because Jason was 15 when he died, heroically, in one of the most selfless acts in comics, to save a woman who literally handed him over to be brutally murdered. He was 12 when Bruce plucked him off the streets, he'd been homeless and fending for himself for at least two years. I personally think that Jason's story hits harder for him and Bruce if their original, canon relationship, of Jason as starry-eyed and eager to learn and absolutely devoted to Bruce and Bruce to Jason, is preserved. But Jason's origins does leave room for a meaningful interpretation of him as angry and frustrated at the lack of meaningful results of Bruce's methods.

And that's really where my irritation at stories like Batman: Urban Legends, Cheer and Batman The Adventure Continues has it's roots.

Every time one of these stories comes out, I think (or hope, rather) that this will be the one that remembers and respects the origins of the Jason and the Red Hood, that takes into account the changed sensibilities of comics readers in the 30 years since Jason's death and the subtle, 20 year, retroactive campaign to make him the "bad Robin". The "born bad" trope is played out and literally no one likes the message it implies. That some kids are just bad eggs and there's nothing parents or the adults around them can do. Especially when it's played as the kid's fault. If Jason's time as Robin is going to be characterized by anger, then it should be rooted in anger at the social injustices he witnessed as he grew up in an impoverished, crime-ridden, area and the horrors he faced raising himself when every day was a battle for survival. There are topical, meaningful, stories to tell with that backdrop.

But those are never the stories we get.

⚠⚠ Spoilers for Batman: Urban Legends, Cheer ⚠⚠

I'm particularly disappointed in Urban Legends because for the first issue, it looked like that was the kind of story we were going to get. I was put off by the first flashback of Jason being mesmerized by Bruce's guns, and I got that feeling in my gut that it was a bad sign. Jason depicted as impatient and overconfident and the scene with the guns is heavy-handed foreshadowing that got my spidey-sense tingling. I had a inkling then (in the first three pages) of how this story was going to play out, but it was early and I could still see many narrative paths that could lead to a satisfying story. My concerns were soothed somewhat and the little flame of my hope fanned, with the flashback of Alfred scolding Bruce, with Barbara's concern for Jason. A bit of worry returned with the way Jason ruthlessly pursued an addict who didn't appear to be a dealer and with the ending of the issue. The stuff with the addict sat wrong with me but the ending was tempered some by how despicable Tyler's dad was written. The scene was clearly set so that the reader could sympathize with Jason's decision and the scene with the addict could be brushed aside as a side-effect of comics over-the-top need for constant action, so I still held hope.

Issue 2 made me uncomfortable and it's where my hope starts to take a backseat to my expectations. I can dismiss Jason's self-deprecating internal monologue as unreliable narration, except that the flashback reinforces his thought process to explicitly show that it's not unreliable narration, and should be taken at face value. Jason faces physical abuse at the hands of his mother's drug dealer and when the flashback continues later, Jason kills the drug dealer. To be clear, this is a pre-Bruce Jason. His mom is still alive. He's like... 10. He kills this guy for shoving his head into a wall and implying Jason's mother paid for her drugs with sex. This is a scene that serves a single purpose. To show that Jason has always been prone to violence.

In the spirit of full disclosure, there is the small chance the drug dealer might not be dead. But the story obviously wants the reader to think he is, and it hasn't done anything to change that yet.

Starlin already did this story with The Diplomat’s Son in 1988 and he did it infinitely better. AND that’s still technically canon. So now I’m supposed to believe that Jason lost his cool bad enough to kill two douche bags before his sweet 16? Like it’s totally normal for abused kids raised in poverty, who’ve led hard and heartbreaking lives to just... haul off and kill people? That’s bullshit, and when taken with the Jason in the third issue, who is little more than an idiot thug, this story is really doubling down on some fucked up stereotypes.

Which brings us to the most recent issue. I went into this installment with very low expectations. I thought this story was going to be about Jason, through this experience with Tyler, a young boy with a similar background to Jason's, coming to the realization that Bruce's way is the best way and that Bruce did his best by Jason.

That would be annoying (in no small part because it takes increasingly absurd levels of plot armor to keep Bruce's no kill rule relevant, let alone irrefutably right). But I can probably live with that, if only because maybe if Jason officially falls back into line with the Bats crusade, maybe I'll get stories that treat him with respect, stories that don't relegate him to comic relief, dumb brute, or a background body with no lines in a story about the Joker burning Gotham (like Jason would just fucking stand there quietly for that).

And that may still be where the story is going, Jason realizing Bruce is right.

But holy shit do I not have the right words to describe how fucking insulting and gross issue three is.

From start to finish--including the flashback--Jason is written as cruel and fucking stupid. Like straight up dumb.

The entire issue is Bruce explaining the fucking basics to Jason like it's his first day. And Jason flies off the fucking handle and terrorizes a doctor he knows isn't a part of making the Cheerdrops, beats the shit out of some random addicts, and finally, when he can't accomplish anything on his own because he's a dumb brute he calls Barbara for help and rushes in with no information where he's promptly incapacitated and must now wait to be rescued by Batman.

This panel is the least of the issues sins but I can’t screenshot the entire story but it’s representative of the tone for the whole issue (and retroactively tainted the prior two issues).

This is beyond insulting. The only conclusions Jason comes to in this issue are the ones Bruce leads him to by talking to him like he can’t make the simplest connections. And like... in this story Jason can’t make the simplest connections.

This (and the Jason throughout the entirety of this issue) is a far cry from the Jason we fell in love with in Under the Red Hood, who was competent and strategic and intelligent enough to seize control of Gotham’s underworld from Black Mask (who’s no fucking slouch, he’s the first and only person to unify organized crime in Gotham) AND elude and manipulate Bruce until the time and place of his choosing.

This is a far cry from even the Red Hood and the Outlaws Jason who is competent enough to fight the League of Shadows and Ra’s al Ghul (among very dangerous and skilled others) and smart enough to create antidotes for mind control nanotech viruses.

As he should be, by the way. Jason Todd is one of the best, most comprehensively trained fighters in DC’s stable of non powered vigilantes. He’s not irrational or hot headed. He’s pragmatic, tactically minded, and patient. He’s a detective. Right now. Has been since he was 12. Bruce doesn’t have to make him one because he already is. 

Jason is not a stupid thug who uses his fists because his brain doesn’t work. And I can’t tell you how so very exhausted I am by this narrative. 

This is actually the most egregious example of Jason’s skills and intelligence being not just undermined but dismissed entirely. Even Morrison’s Jason had some degree of competency. 

The one, single redeeming factor of this story is the art. It’s beautiful. And Marcus To is a godsend he seems to be one of only a couple of artists who remember that Jason was a child when he was Robin and I’m literally only buying this book because of him. 

Anyway, I’m sorry. I didn’t want that to come out so... um... passionately lol. I’m just very very tired. My intention with this isn’t to ruin it for you, if you like it, that’s fine. 

But this issue shot this story to the top of my "Vehemently Despise” list. 1) Batman: Urban Legends (Cheer), 2) Battle for the Cowl/Morrison’s Batman and Robin, 3) Batman The Adventure Continues.

I hope the next issues somehow salvage this dumpster fire. But I’m not expecting it.

(Damnit. That sounded harsh again. To reiterate, I’m not trying to judge anyone who enjoys it, I just personally hate it and you asked me why lol 😅)

[britt-writes]

hi lovely i have a request for you because youre work is absolutely amazing aHH ! could you maybe so some headcanons/oneshot on lucas making his gf cry cause he's getting all pissed with his computer n is getting angry and then accidentally takes it out on his gf?? there's no pressure at all, I really do love your work and I'm so happy you write for Lucas <33

Thank you so so much, I really appreciate it, and I'm happy to do this request for you! I went for a little drabble with this one. Hopefully, I didn't make you wait too long for it. 💕 (I added a cut since it was getting a bit long and, and I don't want to invade people's dashes.)

Prompt: Lucas making his girlfriend cry

Drabble title: Poor Choice of Words

Word Count: 2008

With the semester coming to a close, you found yourself balls deep in what felt like never-ending exams to study for and detailed research papers to type. Needless to say that the hefty accumulation of college work had been piling up on you, leaving you stressed and fatigued, ultimately leaving you with no motivation or desire to get work done; just this huge blank whenever you stared at your books.

Barely able to hold yourself together with this massive headache from the free-for-all death match your thoughts were having up there, you were in desperate need of some quiet and rest. You were sure that you’d eventually break down if you didn’t.

Lucas was nice enough to let you get that quiet you needed, letting you take over his bed to nap and rest your head and eyes while he tapped away on his computer. He kept it down, which you appreciated. He’d always been the strong, silent type of guy. The only noises you could hear were the clicking of his keyboard and his foot tapping at the ground—a little tic of his, being rather fidgety.

You hadn’t quite fallen asleep, being quite restless, but you did occasionally lull in and out of consciousness. Maybe it was the damn heat wave that hit Dulvey that kept you up, or maybe it was your headache, but nonetheless, it felt nice to lie down and do nothing, worrying about nothing.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed since you had decided to lie down in your lover’s bed, but as the seconds ticked by, you could hear Lucas’ foot tapping becoming faster, seemingly aggressive. His fingers had also joined in, just tapping at the desk.

You didn’t think much of it at first, brushing it off as Lucas simply being his regular, fidgety self; he’d probably stop in a minute or so. But then you heard a low growl from him, followed by a series of curses muttered underneath his breath.

“C'mon, ya slow piece o’ shit,” you heard him say.

Shifting around, you faced him, opening your eyes. Lucas was having some issues with his computer, and one quick glance showed that his programs and even cursor were running at abysmally sluggish speeds. You weren’t sure how you hadn’t heard it at first, but his computer’s fans were loud as hell, probably working their asses off. When was the last time Lucas cleaned them? The poor old box computer sounded like it was suffering.

“Motherfucker!” Lucas suddenly yelled out, nearly jolting you out of your skin.

You flinched as he began smacking the computer, making you sit up on the bed as you stared at Lucas while his patience ran thinner with every passing second. You remained still and quiet, worried about his state of anger, but also unsure if you should intervene in an attempt to get him to simmer down. Truth be told, you hated watching people get angry, even if the anger wasn’t directed at you; it put you in a state of anxiety, wanting nothing more to keep the situation from escalating further.

“Aw, what the hell?! What now?!” He yelled as his screen seemed to freeze.

“Um, hey, babe?” You intervened, sounding very meek.

He didn’t reply, continuing to aggressively fumble with his computer, still spewing insults and curses at the device. Maybe that should have been your cue to leave Lucas be, but you didn’t take it, wanting to help him.

“Babe?” You said again, a little louder this time in case he hadn’t heard you the first time over the sound of his own voice.

“What?” Lucas said rather sharply.

“Do you want me to help or something? How about you turn it off and try cleaning the fans to start off? Then, maybe-”

Lucas whirled around to face you, the annoyed look on his face immediately shutting you up.

“What the fuck would yer dumbass know? Shit’s already fucked, so I don’t need it worsenin’. I don’t need yer fuckin’ help, so mind yer goddamn business,” he said before going back to his computer, not paying you any further mind.

You had never been on the receiving end of Lucas’ outbursts until now. Maybe you were being too sensitive, but you couldn’t help the tears threatening to fall. Sure, you and Lucas have insulted each other plenty of times in the past, but it was all obvious playful banter and teasing between the two of you with no ill intentions. This time around, he held this dead serious expression and tone, making you feel like he actually thought that of you.

Lucas was short-tempered, prone to outbursts at the slightest inconvenience, and you knew that he ran his mouth faster than his brain during those moments. He often did or said things that he didn’t truly mean, letting his anger get the best of him. He probably hadn’t even realized what he said, but that still didn’t mean that you didn’t feel as if your heart shattered in millions of pieces at his poor choice of words.

Wordlessly, you lied back down, facing the wall as you curled up underneath the blankets. A few tears streamed down your cheeks as you tried your best to keep quiet, not wanting to make a scene. You just hoped that Lucas would soon enough calm down on his own accord.

~~~~~~

He’d say that a little over half an hour had passed since his computer started acting up, but Lucas had since abandoned the device to fool around on his phone, feet propped atop his desk. At least he was distancing himself from the source of his anger.

Maybe about a year ago, Lucas would still be fuming and smashing things around his room, but ever since you came into his life, he’s been getting better at taking breaks, not fixating on whatever was irritating him in order to cool down a bit. You were there to comfort him, listen to his venting and clear his head.

Overall, a model lover with the patience of a saint to deal with him— Lucas himself would be the first to say it.

So, why the fuck did he yell at you the way he did earlier? He absolutely hated any asshole who dared make you upset; Lucas always promised to make quick work of anybody who hurt you, and all you had to do was say the word.

But now, Lucas was the one to feel like the biggest shithead ever.

Earlier feelings of fury were slowly being replaced by regret, which was an odd feeling. It was a first for him; he’s never really given a shit enough to feel regret or shame for his actions, even when he knew that he was in the wrong. But it felt different when it involved you. Maybe he still felt anger, anger at himself for treating you like shit when all you wanted to do was help him because you cared.

You were already stressed enough in the first place with all the work you had to do, and Lucas wasn’t helping by taking out his anger on you. It was an accident; he really regretted it.

Looking back at you, Lucas saw that you were still curled on his bed. You hadn’t said anything in the last half hour, so he wondered if you had fallen asleep, though you may just be ignoring him after the things he said. He didn’t like that thought, but he knew he deserved it.

He could feel panic settling in his chest— what if he fucked up for good? What if you drew the line there? What if this was the moment you realized you could do better than him? What if you walked out on him?

Those ‘what if’ questions made him nauseated. Lucas was shit at showing it, but you were his entire world. This relationship was his only motivation to even bother trying in life. Without you, he was sure that he’d either end up thrown into the streets or in jail— just some loser with no chance in hell to make it.

He had to calm the fuck down, he thought. He knew damn well that having an internal breakdown over something that was his fault in the first place wasn’t going to get him anywhere.

He stood up from his chair, cautiously approaching his bed, almost unsure of what he should do. It was like he was second-guessing himself— maybe he should let you sleep it off.

But Lucas ultimately decided to join you in bed, slowly scooting against you and draping his arm over your waist. He already felt like shit, but the feeling only worsened when he felt you flinch, and after an uncomfortable minute of silence, Lucas finally found it in himself to say something.

“Are ya mad at me?” He asked.

And he wanted nothing more than to ram his head against drywall, not impressed with the way he chose to open up.

“Are you mad at me?” You countered in a shaky tone that split his heart in two.

“Wasn’t mad at ya… jus’ the computer,” he said.

“Do you really think I’m dumb?” You asked, voice nearly inaudible.

“C'mon baby, y'know I don’t,” he said.

The silence on your end was goddamn unnerving, absolutely stressing him out. As the seconds ticked by, Lucas could feel his breathing become ragged and heavy, the atmosphere making him increasingly more anxious.

“I’m sorry,” he finally said, realizing that he should have said that in the first place.

Lucas didn’t remember the last time he apologized to someone. Hell, he wasn’t even sure if he ever did in his lifetime.

“I just wanted to help,” you said, voice quivering. “But you just yelled at me instead.”

And then the sobs came; Lucas could feel your body shake against him. Oh, God. He made you cry. Lucas didn’t think it was possible for him to feel any shittier at the moment, but here he was.

“No-no-no-no— don’t cry,” Lucas shushed, holding you tighter and burying his face in the crook of your neck.

“I’m so fuckin’ sorry, baby,” he apologized again. “I know ya just wanted to help, 'cause yer just the sweetest thing out there.”

“You looked so serious… like you really meant it,” you managed to say through choked up cries. “I feel like I’m the stupidest bother to you.”

“Didn’t mean a goddamn word of it. I know it ain’t no excuse, but I wasn’t thinkin’ right. Aw, shit— I’m the stupid piece o’ crap here. Yer hella smart, darlin’; there ain’t one part o’ ya that’s dumb,” he said. “Y'know I love ya, right?”

You were taking your sweet time to respond, making Lucas all the more anxious. He thought that he had royally fucked up beyond repair.

“Do you… d'ya still love me?” He asked, finding himself ridiculously pathetic for asking such a thing; the shakiness in his tone didn’t help either.

“Of course I do,” you said.

Lucas found some relief in the swift response at his question— no stuttering, no vague answers, no skipped beat. Your crying had also started to die down.

“So, you ain’t gonna, ya know, leave or somethin’?” He asked.

“No. I wouldn’t break up with you over something like this. It’s not worth our entire relationship,” you said. “I’m just a little sad over it. It’s… not really fun getting yelled at by someone you love, you know?”

Lucas nodded. “Yeah.”

Of course nobody liked getting into fights with their loved ones. He sure as hell knew that he’d blow a fuse if you yelled and insulted him the way he had.

“I have anger issues…” he mumbled.

“I know,” you said. “But you’re not as bad as you used to be.”

Lucas could only promise to get better going forward, and with your encouragement, he was sure that he’d be able to do it. But he’d have to try hard, and he knew it.

“Y'ave been hella stressed lately. Want me to help you study later, or somethin’?” He offered.

“If you have time, that’d motivate me.”

“Yeah, I got time. Don’t got much to do in the first place.”

You turned around to face him, wiping the remainder of your tears and offering a small smile before pressing your lips against his in a soft, sweet kiss. You then nuzzled Lucas’ chest as he cradled you protectively against him.

Apology accepted.

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 34

💖 first time reader click here 💖

A little bit of plot, but mostly ironstrange x reader filthy porn. Bukkake stuff. Stephen finally opening up a lil bit, I mean... I've slept through a 1/3 of a hospital and lemme tell you, doctors are kinky bastards. On the same note, there's definitely going to be a chapter where all three men are involved after the plot shit is resolved.

There was something big brewing. I had a hunch... which was more like a strong sense of doom... hanging over me and the rest of the world. Peter also had noticed the sudden spike in anxiety, quoting the sudden disappearance of many low-tier mutants from the streets. Usually, Peter dealt with at least a few enhanced enemies during his patrols but the closer it got to Christmas, the less enhanced bothered with small-time crimes, the more intense the buzzing of his Spidey sense became.

Now that my immediate lack of income wasn't a problem anymore, I set business onto that damn mercenary. I was no spy, I was no SHIELD operative but... I could be very clever.

First things first, I had to make sure I would stay alive no matter what. A subdermal tracker was a good guarantee of security and I spent many hours making one - having to keep it a secret was incredibly hard, I hated lying to my loves and I hated avoiding Wanda even more - I was constantly on the edge around the telepath, hyperfocused on keeping up the pretense of normalcy.

I wouldn't be me if I couldn't successfully pull off a whole ass façade. Unfortunately, the continued failures of the people searching left and right for the mercenary only fueled my strength for the inevitable fuck-fest that I would have to create in order to make sure my people get the peace they fucking deserve. The web of lies grew in size every damn day.

Subdermal tracker, an implant that reports directly to Friday upon activation. It hurt like a bitch - I had cut myself open, an inch wide gash on the inside of my forearm - and put it in without any anesthesia in my own bathroom, not even thinking twice before making up a lie that I had been careless in the lab and hurt myself.

An antidote to common tranquilizers, creating it gave me a headache the size of Moscow but I'd been successful; Tony assembled the whole team when he found it out, offering me a ridiculous amount of money for the formula. It was weird. SHIELD was interested, too, and I had to witness Tony and Coulson argue. Apparently, the agency wanted to recruit me and Tony was adamantly against it, totally forgetting the promise Natasha had given me. In the end, the spy and Coulson shared a quiet conversation and the man left, respectfully complimenting my skills.

I sold the formula to Stark Industries, unable to get rid of the weirdness of the situation. I had to shake hands with my own boyfriend and his ex-girlfriend... In a business setting. What. Just what. Bucky and Stephen couldn't stop laughing at the face I made all throughout that day - and Clint even went as far as to bake me a gag cake, a cartooney handshake drawn in frosting on top of it. I hit him with a spatula, Loki smiled in his direction for the first time in, like, ever. It was a trip and Tony had way too much fun with the incident.

Perhaps, turning myself into a cyborg stew wasn't the best plan that was possible to think up in a few weeks' time but I've never claimed to be exceptionally intelligent; if anything, I've always considered myself to be a moderately educated idiot. It is common knowledge that there are two halves of a whole idiot: my second half was on his way from California, having had received my very detailed e-mail about the whole cursed box fiasco and the consequences that followed. I could barely contain my excitement at the prospect of seeing uncle Eddie and his symbiote again.

Tony wasn't even half as excited; if anything, he bordered on outright hostile, bickering, and sassing everybody left and right. It could have been the situation at hand finally getting on his last nerves. It could have been his jealousy, the same that appeared every time I paid extra attention to someone that wasn't him, Bruce or Stephen. Either way, Bruce was sighing all the time now and Stephen's remarks began to fill with poison once again.

Just like the good old times, I guess. I was forced to pull a Me over and over, interrupting their petty arguments with increasingly absurd remarks. I felt like everybody was laughing at me these days, which ended in only one way it could have...

"Brat," Stephen's patience was paper-thin and, being forcefully distracted from yelling at Tony, he directed his angst at the nearest person - me. "I oughta put you over my knee. I swear to Cosmos..."

"Blah, blah, blah. Don't you ever get tired of listening to yourself talk?" I raised my eyebrows, tone deceptively calm. "You're talking too much for someone who can't even..." I didn't get to finish my sentence, suddenly finding my mouth firmly glued shut. It was magic - the sensation was pulling, but not unpleasant. Reminded me of a ball gag Tony had used on me in the early days of our relationship.

"Now, Dumbledore, hold your horses..." Tony interjected looking none-too-happy. The engineer placed a warning arm on the sorcerer's bicep, their little spat seemingly forgotten.

"What, Tony? She's been nothing but a mouthy urchin the past few days, I can't stand it anymore," They shared a meaningful look; no matter how much Tony wanted to argue, he knew Stephen was right. What he didn't know was that there probably have been a magic versus science altercation... Or worse. Humiliation was a small price to pay for some (relative) peace.

I did what I do best. I annoyed them further, throwing up a juicy middle finger to the two men and turned around with a huff, mind set on finding Loki to undo the mute ban Stephen gave me. Needless to say, I didn't make it very far.

In mere seconds, I was sandwiched between the two men, Stephen's finger delicately holding my chin to force me to look into his eyes. Tony was holding onto my shoulders from behind me - I could feel the tension, my engineer was almost buzzing with it. I was pretty sure my eyes were laughing anyway because Stephen's frown slowly transformed into a coy smirk once his stormy blues focused on my face.

"Brat," He repeated once again. "She's doing this on purpose."

"I can't say I'm surprised," Tony's breath tickled the nape of my neck. "That does sound like our little Princess," Apparently, it took all of a 0.1 second for Tony to switch from annoyed to horny. Men, they were so easy to play. "Baby, if you wanted our attention you could have just said so," He chastised me, hands sliding down to my waist.

I hummed, and then aggressively hummed some more until Stephen removed the magical gag. "Not like you'd notice it, being occupied with tearing each other's hair out," I pouted.

The sorcerer briefly averted his eyes, leaning down to softly kiss my pout. It was very unlikely I'd get an actual apology but a kiss I won't be complaining about either. "So, your best tactic was to annoy us even more? How does that work out for you?"

I pulled on the tied fabric around his waist, bringing him closer to me. "Pretty good, if I'm being honest. You're exactly where I wanted you to be," Carelessly, I began untying the layers of silks and cotton I had become intimately familiar with over the course of the past few weeks. Most of the time Steph wore his wizard garbs and while figuring out how to undo them was a trip at first, I had gotten him desperate enough a few times, for him to show me a few tips and tricks for easier access.

Tony snorted somewhere behind me. "You just want us for our bodies," His hands wormed their way under my shirt, brushing the underside of my breasts. Bra? Hardly know her. "Our beautiful, sexy bodies." Yes Tony, very humble.

"When will you learn, people?" I asked rhetorically, simultaneously leaning into both Tony's and Stephen's touch. "Why fight each other when you could be fucking me into oblivion instead?"

Stephen snorted, still not completely used to the at times crude things that left my (and occasionally Tony's) mouth. I had a hunch the sorcerer was holding back somewhat - for whatever reason - and I was eagerly waiting for him to get comfortable enough to reveal that special part of himself. Whatever it was, I just knew it was delicious and sinful and-

"Do you really think I will be giving you what you want after your little... Stunt?" Steph went balls out; his voice dropped and the intensity of his stare left me breathless. The hand that was stroking my face wrapped around my throat as he had some sort of a silent conversation with Tony.

"Yeah," I emphasized the word with an inaudible 'duh' behind it but obediently trotted along as Stephen backed up towards the couch, leading me by the throat like a pet on a leash. I was steadily going into 'no thoughts, head empty' territory.

"I like it when you get all bossy," Tony remarked casually but he was close enough for me to hear the strain in his voice. Every time we fucked, Tony eagerly gave up the control to Stephen. I definitely saw the appeal. Stephen Strange demanded authority effortlessly, his stern but fair attitude simply demanded to kneel.

That's just what I did. As soon as Stephen made himself comfortable on the Italian leather couch, I dropped to my knees, looking up at the man with big round eyes. Just like Tony and Bruce, Stephen had his own weaknesses when it came to moi and I wasn't ashamed to exploit them. Steph's stroked my hair, carding careful fingers through it, slowly unbuttoning his pants with his other hand.

"If you insist on being mouthy, I have a better task for you," He husked, pulling me closer towards him. I called it his doctor voice. Honestly, I don't have a clue how his surgical team could be around him with their pants on back in the day... The man was a snack on a silver platter.

Steph's erection sprang free. I didn't hesitate to wrap my hand around it, stroking the underside of his glans just like he liked it, looking to the side where Tony landed on the couch next to Stephen, a curious look on his face. Yeah, Tony liked to watch. Me and Stephen or me and Bruce... Me and Stephen and Bruce? That's an idea for later.

"Don't mind little old me," Tony smirked his trademark Stark mischief, getting comfortable, ditching his oil-stained shirt and unbuttoning his pants to lazily palm himself through his boxers. "Carry on," The smirk only grew when Tony noticed both me and Steph eyeing him with amusement.

I hid my grin, nodding my head, before wrapping my lips around the tip of Stephen's cock, relaxing my throat to prepare for the intrusion. Sweet and salty, the slit on his cockhead was mercilessly teased by the tip of my tongue.

Stephen murmured encouragements under his breath as I began to bob up and down, him controlling the pace with a hand in my hair, just the right balance between cruel and gentle. The sorcerer was always too good to me, bringing me to the point of overstimulation and instantly soothing the ache afterward; "Fuck, darling, your mouth feels like heaven," He groaned as I snuck a look upwards to see his lips parted and a steady flush crawling up his neck.

"She knows how to work a man, doesn't she?" Tony's lust had him panting, hips moving into his own hand. He leaned closer to Stephen, brushing my hair behind my ear with a tender hand. "Merlin needs to share," Tony began pulling me in his direction. I reluctantly let go of Stephen's cock, keeping up the pace with my hand as I scooted closer to Tony to be able to mouth at his stiff erection.

Watching me suck cock always got Tony hard enough to pound nails with. I couldn't blame him, I knew what I could do and did well; by the time I made my way down his thick flesh, drool was dripping down my chin and the make-up around my eyes was surely smeared by tears. My engineer was much less gentle than Steph, pounding my face without reservations.

"I know you can take it, baby girl, fuck," My face was held in his strong grip, thumbs digging into my jaw. "Such a good girl," The two words went straight down to my pussy and I had to squirm and clench my thighs together, whining at the lack of friction.

The air was pierced by a low moan - Stephen was fisting his erection almost desperately now, almost as desperately as I was humping the air, whining like a bitch in heat at the taste of Tony's cock in my mouth. I knew neither of the men would last long, not with all that pent up tension running through their minds and bodies.

"Fuck, come here, baby girl," The engineer yanked me off his cock, gripping the base of it so forcefully his knuckles turned white. I was all but dragged into the space between them; still kneeling, barely seeing with snot and tears smeared all over my face, I couldn't hold in the broken moan as the realization set in.

"Keep your eyes open!" Steph instructed furiously, scooting to tower over me. Tony followed in his steps as I obediently lifted my eyes to their cocks and then their faces; nearly identical furrowed brow expressions stared back at me, lips moist and eyes wide. Both men stroked themselves with renewed vigor.

I hummed softly before sticking out my tongue; their reaction didn't let me wait long. Strings of pearly white cum landed in my hair, on my face; I felt the warmth on my skin and tasted their salt and musk on the tip of my tongue, reflexively swallowing each and every drop that landed in my mouth, savoring it just like I savored the sinful groans that left their mouths.

"Fuck, you're so good to us," Tony panted, gracelessly falling backward onto the couch.

Stephen, however, didn't hurry to catch his breath, giving me a thoughtful look. His fingers shook more than ever but he paid no mind to the discomfort, gathering the cum dripping down my face with two fingers and offering it to me, holding them up to my lips as I gently cleaned them off. And he did it again, and again, until Tony gave a weak moan of recognition, throwing an arm under his head.

"Be polite, Princess," Stephen's voice hadn't lost the lust in it just yet.

"Thank you, sir," I mumbled, utterly captivated by the way he was looking at me. Stormy blues radiated a strong sense of intensity, devotion perhaps, that I wasn't ready for.

Stephen smiled at me, almost coyly, before kneeling right next to me and bringing me over the edge with a few sharp, clever movements of his hand. I held onto his shoulders for dear life, barely noticing Tony's reaction - if there was one - my other lover seemed to be as surprised as I was, choosing to hang back and observe the unusual situation.

I had a feeling that whatever it was, it would make another appearance during our playtime. It wasn't just sex, it wasn't making love - it was... Something. I loved every second of it.

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