#i just...get a bit madder every time i think about it is all

[kissforyouu]

pairing : jungook x reader

genre : smut , angst

warnings : against the car , in the car , oral sex ( f recieving ) , spanking , jealousy , ft. lil bit of taehyung ;) , toxic relationship , uses of words like "slut" (during sex) , exhibitionism (kinda) , teasing , unprotected sex

a/n : idk what this is but hope u enjoy LOL. and dont ask me why the name of this is woof woof woof idk either umm

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・． .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

Me and him were always on and off. Jeon Jungkook, I mean. Not the man I was currently on top of right now. That's Kim Taehyung. He was hot, very hot, and the fact that he was Jungkook's best friend made it even hotter. Taehyung knew me and Jungkook were something, whatever we called it. But at this moment, he did not give a single fuck.

His head was thrown back as his hands roamed under the silk material of my black mini dress, all over my ass. My clothed core was pressed against his crotch, grinding slowly. Hands tangled in Taehyung's messy locs, his tongue licks over the spot right under my ear. He nibbles and sucks on the spot gently, taking his time.

I continued moving my hips, begging for some more friction. I wanted something, but not skin to skin contact. Not with Taehyung. I had other plans.

A small moan slips past my lips as I grab Taehyung's wrist before placing it on my right breast. Taehyung's eyes flicker with excitement, his hands immediately squeezing both of my breasts tight. I could tell he was excited, to touch me and to hold me, too bad you weren't going to let him get his way. Didn't think Jungkook's so called best friend would be this unloyal.

I let out a small whine purposely into Taehyung's ear, pretending to be feeling something, as my hand slide into his pocket to pull out his phone. Laying back a bit, I look at Taehyung with puppy eyes, signalling him to unlock his phone. He raises his eyebrow at me, a little confused.

"Wan' to give Jungkook a show..." I tilt my head to the side, giving him my most seductive smile. Taehyung lets out a devilish laugh as he unlocks the phone. Men are so easy.

I place a kiss on his cheek as a thank you, my eyes scanning through his messenger app in search of Jungkook's chat. I find it, the corner of my lip curving into a smirk. I click on the small camera icon at the bottom of the chat, then pressing record.

Looking at the camera with my eyes big and glossy and the prettiest smile on my face, I then look down to Taehyung, who's face was now smothered in my tits. Cracking up my laugh, which I know Jungkook loves, I push Taehyung's face further into my tits. He wasn't even doing anything, why's he so boring.

You pretend to like it, arching my back more, fake moans escaping my mouth as I grind myself onto him. To make my man who'll be seeing this even madder, I make sure to moan Taehyung's name.

"Mmm, Taehyung!" it sounded so fake but that didn't matter. You knew Jungkook would recognise how fake that was anyway. All I wanted to do was to make Jungkook mad. For him to take me home after, then fuck the living shit out of me, then tell me he loves me and make up. And for then, not that I want it, but for this cycle to repeat because one of us just have to fuck up each time. But I didn't care, not one bit, I'd go back to him each and every time. And I know he would too.

Without wasting more time, I click send. It didn't take a second for Jungkook to view the message. Internally, I was giggling at sight of the two blue checkmarks. I almost forgot about the man beneath me.

you : [video]

jkkk🤘🏻: ???

rlly y/n? im omw, he better not be on ur fucking cunt when i get there.

My eyes beam at his reply. He's on his way. Please come quickly and get me away from this man. You let out a groan, way too bored. He was still on my tits, just touching them all over.

About 5 minutes of the same thing — yes, 5. You wonder if he's ever had a woman on his bed before — Jungkook comes crashing in. We were at a party, he knew where we were because you guess Taehyung must've told him where he'd be tonight, definitely not expecting to have me grinding on him. You watch Jungkook's eyes scan the party trying to find us, with your head resting on top of Taehyung's shoulders as he did whatever he did.

Jungkook looked so good. He had his shoulder length hair down, a black wife beater on, his pants hung low rise showing off his calvin klein boxers which I love with a black belt to hold it all together. And to add the cherry on top, he also had a thin silver chain dangling from his neck. Not just any chain, it was the I had gifted him. He was a walking snack, no wonder every woman turned their heads to look at him wherever he went. Too bad, he's mine.

Jungkook's eyes land on mine, then on the man I was on. His eyebrows furrowed, oh he was mad, his tongue poked his cheek as he walked towards us. In no time, he hand was on my arm, pulling me off of Taehyung.

"Really, Taehyung? My girl, out of everyone?" My girl. I felt butterflies in my stomach. I hear him yelling at Taehyung a few more words, but they all sound muffled to me. The only thing I could focus on was "my girl". If only he made it official. We've been boyfriend and girlfriend so many times, breaking up and getting back together. I don't care. I'd still do it. To be with him.

After spitting his last few words out, he turns his head to look at me, eyebrows still furrowed and mad.

"And you. Could've just fucking called me. Had to fuck my best friend to get my attention? Huh?"

He looked so mad, I loved it.

Jungkook's grip on my hand never leaves as he storms down through the crowd with me, leaving Taehyung all alone and frustrated. I grip onto his bicep as we walk down the stairs.

I sigh, breaking the silence.

"I missed you"

"Yeah, fucking right, Y/n. That's why you went and seduced my best friend?"

I sigh, releasing his arm.

"I missed you a lot, Jungkook. I'm sorry about before. I just — I don't know, okay? Sometimes I get so insecure about you with other girls. I don't know how you are, considering how we're always on and off and never stable."

"Oh, yeah? So that makes it okay for you to grind your ass on Taehyung?!" He raises his voice at me. We were literally yelling at eachother in the car park.

"JUNGKOOK! I don't want Taehyung, I want YOU! I don't know why I did that but everything I do is because of you, and FOR YOU because I want you, and-and I don't want you to b-be with some other girl! I'm sorry, okay? Fuck, I got jealous and I stormed out of your house and today I got with Taehyung because I wanted to make you jealous and I wanted you to come pick me and take me home and make love to me and-and then we'd go back to the usual! As always! Like we always do! We always break up and then—"

I was shut up by him crashing his lips onto mine, pushing me against his mercedes. The kiss was rough and hungry, he had both of my arms pinned onto the car. He then pulls out,

"You ramble way too much sometimes, baby"

His thumb skims past my lower lip, eyes shifting from my lips to my eyes. He kisses me again, taking my lower lip between his lips as he gently sucks and bites on them. I melt into his kisses, my body almost sliding down the car but he holds me up with his arms that are holding onto my waist. We make out for about 1 more minute before I pull away, desperately in need of air.

He stares at me with a smirk before I try to catch my breath, his finger twirling one of my curls.

I calm my breathing down, finally, then look at him with a smile. "You good?" He says, teasingly, his knee coming in between my legs. I nod my head, feeling his knee glide up my thigh slowly. I let my clothed pussy sit on his knee, my hands traveling up to my breasts to squeeze them through the material. I nod, my eyes drowsy. Jungkook's knee begins to rub my clit slowly, creating some friction. But not enough.

I begin to grind onto his knee as he lets out a laugh.

"This is what you wanted? Hm?" He lightly slaps my cheek. I nod my head repeatedly. I let out a shaking breath, fastening my pace on his knee.

"Yeah, go on, get yourself off on my knee like the slut you are" his fingers caress my collarbones, slowly gliding them down the small dip of my top to highlight my breasts, his fingers now disappearing in between them. His eyes were filled were lust, tongue poking his cheek, his fingers hook onto the top of my dress before pulling down enough to expose my breasts. I swear I saw his eyes sparkle for a good two seconds. That just made me wetter.

Unknowingly, a moan slip past my lip as I find myself reaching my high. This was so fucking embarrassing in a way, cumming from just grinding on his knee. But it didn't matter, it was him.

"Aah, ah!" I rub my clit over my panties a few several times, finally feeling myself release. It felt like a sticky mess down there. My chest rises up and down as I let out a few breaths out. Shit, I just came. Suddenly, I feel the embarrassment kicking in. My face flushed in red, I try to look away to avoid the gaze of the man whom I just got off of.

"Too embarrassed now? Look at yourself, baby, you're fucking worn out from just my knee" He laughs. It almost feels mocking.

Jungkook's hands glide up my thighs, hooking onto the bottom lace of my dress as he lifts it upto my waist. Right now, my mini dress was just hiked up to my waist from both ends, leaving me almost completely naked.

The smirk in his face never disappears as Jungkook gets down on his knees. His eyes fixed on my wet clothing. Hands now on the waistband of the lace material, he pulls them down upto my knees. My bare pussy all wet and out for him, Jungkook wastes absolutely no time before diving in with a long stripe.

Fuck, finally.

My back arches, hand immediately flying to grip onto his long hair. His tongue licks my bud in a circular motion, then up and down my folds. I feel him place a few kisses all over, making me even wetter. Jungkook releases a breath, then a small hum and he dives back into my pussy. His eyes were closed, displaying his pretty lashes, his mouth skillfully working down there. I moan out his name, thrusting my hips forwards onto his feet. Jungkook groans into my pussy, sending vibrations down me.

"F-fuck...so good! Baby, don't stop" My head was thrown back against his car, tits out, back arched, pussy getting eaten. It was quite the view. Not to mention, we were still at the car park. Anyone could run into us anytime.

Jungkook pulls away for a moment just to spit on my pussy, and before it could dribble down my legs, his tongue catches it as he licks his trail up, back to my clit before he circles my sensitive bud again. He rubs it in the form of an 8, his hand now in between my legs, middle finger rubbing my folds. I feel and hear him hum once again, right before his finger enters me slowly, making me let out a gasp.

I quickly cover my mouth with my hands, lowering my head down to look at the man in between my legs, eating me out and fingering me so good.

I feel his big arms on my thighs, nails digging right into the flesh as they part out my legs even more. Jungkook raises his head up to look at me, letting me get a clear sight of his face fully covered in my slick as his tongue and fingers continue to work on me so good.

His teeth suddenly tug onto my bud, pulling it a bit before releasing it. Shit, he's driving me crazy.

I roll my eyes back, back arching even more. A long whine escapes my mouth as I look down at Jungkook who was now sucking hickeys onto my thighs while his fingers worked on me.

Fuck, I wish I could have him in between my legs like this every single day.

A few seconds later, a gasp leaves my mouth along with a series of whines and moans. Shit, I really was a mess. I was cumming, again, this time all over his mouth and chin. Some even dripped down to the floor and onto his tank top. I stared down at him. I couldn't help but think of how fucking hot he looked like this. Hair messed up, face flushed red and my juices all over him.

"Jungkook, so good..." My chest was rising up and down trying to catch my breath, but I could feel Jungkook's gaze fixed on nothing but my breasts. Next thing, he stands up, his hand digging inside his front pocket to pull out his car key. Impatiently, he unlocks the car.

"Get in the car, baby"

I don't bother replying, already knowing what's happening. A small giggle slips past my lips as I open the car door, stepping inside. I make sure he gets a full view of my ass out in the air and legs spread. In return, I get a spank on my right cheek and a laugh.

I laugh back, making myself comfortable as I just lay there, ass up face down at the back of the car. I didn't need him to tell me twice.

"You know me so well, Y/n." His hand leaves another spank on my right cheek. I hear him get in the car, then close the door. Thankfully, the car was big enough for the both of us to be moving like this.

Jungkook takes in the sight in front of him, his hands palming my cheeks. He then spreads them apart, spitting right in between. He groans as he watches it dribble down my cheeks. His fingers come in contact with my pussy, spreading my juices around so good. I let out small moans, feeling my body relax.

Jungkook's fingers leave a small pat on it before retrieving his fingers back. Right after, I hear the sound of his belt getting removed. The thought of dick inside me itself could make me cum just now. I was so so ready to cum, for the third round.

I turn my head around took at him as he pulls down his pants, then his boxers, and finally releasing his dick out. And god, was he big. He pulls it out then gives it a few pumps. I wiggle my ass, running out of patience.

"Jungkook, I want you inside me now. Please." I emphasise on the 'now'.

"Alright, baby. Anything for you" his lips leave a small kiss on my asscheek. My breathing halts for a second at the feeling of the tip of his dick rubbing against my folds, so teasingly slow.

"Mm, I'll go crazy..." I feel my eyes getting drowsy at the feeling.

"Me too, sweetheart, me too." His other hand glides up my back, caressing it gently. Jungkook pushes in his tip, just a little, making me let out a long whine. He's teasing me!

"Fuck you! Just fuck me! Please!" I almost let out a cry.

Jungkook mocks me once again with a laugh, his tip now a little bit more in. Fuck, why's he doing this. I groan, thinking of taking things into my own matter. My eyes roll back as I bounce back on his dick.

"Shit!" He was now fully inside me, and I couldn't name a better feeling. I grip onto the leather of the seat, slowly gliding myself up and down his dick. Shit, he was so perfect.

"Mmm, so fucking desperate for this dick? That's what you are now?" His palms lay flat on my ass cheeks, supporting me as I bounce backwards on his dick. I nod my head repeatedly as an answer, shouting out small yesses.

My moans and Jungkook's low groans were all we could hear, and the faint sound of his dick going in and out of my heat.

A few more thrusts later, I feel myself getting tired.

"Fuck..." a groan leaves my mouth, my body instantly falling down to the seat. Sex is a whole workout.

"Tired already?" His fingers brush away a few strands of my hair that's sticked to my forehead. I nod, finding myself relaxing to his touch.

Jungkook's smirk grows wider, he flips me onto my back, his body now hovering over me. He looked so majestic, tall and beautiful. My eyes travel from his broad muscular shoulders, down to his arms — big, tattooed and veins popping out —, his sharp v-line, then upwards to his abs glistening with sweat. Eyes traveling lower, I take the image of his dick in, standing tall and proud. Fuck, I think I got wetter.

Unknowingly, my lips part and a small whimper goes out. Jungkook raises an eyebrow, that smug look on his face never leaving.

I know I'm boosting his ego so much right now, for sure.

Jungkook grabs my hand, starting to trail kisses slowly from my fingers to my arm. He kisses my arm, then along my shoulder blade, his other hand pulling my thighs apart. My mouth leaving out a few whimpers, I play with my breasts at the sight of his hand now pumping his dick again. One last tug on my nipple, Jungkook thrusts his dick inside me again, both of us letting out gasps.

He starts to thrust in and out, slowly. I whine loudly, eyes closed and lips apart.

"Baby, fuck— you're so wet!" Jungkook breathes out, fastening his pace. I was so wet that we could hear the sound of it. I bite my lower lip, both hands gripping onto his shoulders. His pace increases more and more, same way my nails dig deep into his shoulders. I know for fact that he'll see nail marks all over his skin next morning. His hips crash into mine repeatedly, balls slapping against my ass cheeks. Fuck, is there anything better than this?

"Jungkook, you're so good, you're making me feel so good~" I moan out, gasping and grunting in the middle. His head bops repeatedly, eyebrows raised, face filled with pleasure.

A few more powerful thrusts later, I feel my high reaching. "Shit, I'm gonna cum" I shout, his thumb on my clit, rubbing fast — adding some extra friction. "Fuck, you're gonna cream my dick nice? Yeah?" He lands a few spanks on my ass, never slowing down his pace. Jungkook's eyes glue onto my tits as they bounce up and down due to his fast pace. I clench around him, his low groans and grunts being his respond as my clenching never stops.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck—" a series of curses leave my lips, eyes rolling back I feel myself orgasm all over him. My cum leaks out, making a mess when his hips clash with ass repeatedly. We were so sticky and sweaty. The smell of sex was taking over.

Jungkook arches his neck back, thrusting in a few times more before he pulls out, tip leaking with cum. He jerks himself off onto my stomach, a bit landing on my tits even. His cum spurts out, cum all over my upper body.

He sighs, his chest rising up and down, same as me. I mewl, eyes closed as I try to catch my breath.

"Fuuuuck," Jungkook groans, "that was hot." I laugh a little at his comment, lightly nodding my head.

He smiles at me before reaching his arm out to the front of the car, then grabbing a pack of tissues. Jungkook returns, pulling out a few tissues and then wiping my chest with it. Then down there as well, I relax at the feeling.

He then throws the dirty tissue away, locking eyes with me.

I crawl onto his lap, my arms engulfing his neck. Jungkook hums, wrapping his arms around my waist. My head on his bare chest, I relax to his little caresses. If only we could lay like this forever. There was a small silence between us. I could tell that we both were thinking about what I had said before, right before we started get all over eachother.

"Jungkook." I decide to break the silence.

"Yeah?" He answers immediately.

"I'm sorry."

"Me too."

I pull away to look at him, his big eyes already looking at me.

"I'm sorry for making you jealous with Taehyung. I shouldn't have done that." I admit.

"And I'm sorry for going out with Aeri before. I should've told you, baby, fuck, but I promise we didn't do anything."

He says, sincerely.

"Okay." I nod.

"Can we—can we please get back together?"

"We never broke up. You just stormed out mad." He says.

I press my lips tightly, feeling guilty.

"Jungkook", I press the side of my cheek onto his chest again.

"Do you still love me?"

He cracks a small laugh, "Baby, what are you asking? I've always loved you."

"I think we have issues." The words leave in a small, almost inaudible voice. I don't want to admit to it.

"We always fight, breakup, then we make eachother jealous, then we make love, then we make up—then it repeats." I murmer.

Jungkook sighs, I could tell he was admitting to what I was saying.

"Give us one more chance, baby. Let's work this out. I promise you this time. I'll be everything you need."

"You're already everything I need." I whisper.

"I love you, Y/n"

"I love you more, Jungkook"

[puckinghischier]

thinking about how luke hughes is probably the best hugger known to man. like he is so large i just know his hugs would be like a big warm blanket around you making you forget anything that had you worried

“baby, what’s wrong?” Luke asked as you walked through the front door, shoulders rounded and a frown on your face.

“bad day, L” you responded, dropping your bag at the door and walking straight over to him, needing to feel one of his all encompassing hugs.

“hug, please?” you asked him, looking up at him.

he didn’t respond, but walked forward and wrapped his long arms around you, squeezing your body to his so tightly you felt like you would melt into him.

work had been rough lately, your duties increasing and your patience decreasing. you hadn’t had a day off in over a week, and you were so tired all you wanted to do was cry and then sleep. luke knew you’d been struggling lately. your coworkers were getting on your last nerve, management was making you madder by the day, and you just wanted time away from work, but despite your requests, they kept giving everyone else time off, but not you.

he wanted to be there for you, always trying to make sure the apartment was clean, the dishes were done, and dinner was either cooked and ready or a take out order was placed when you got home. on especially hard days, he even had a glass of your favorite wine waiting on you. but he couldn’t always be there.

with the new season quickly approaching, his training hours were increasing tremendously in anticipation of training camp starting. he was being pulled in a million different directions right now, not always there when you come home from a long day. those days were especially bad, because you had no relief from the shitty day when you got home, going and sulking on the couch instead.

luckily he was today, because all you wanted was him from the second your least favorite coworker started bitching at you today.

he rubs his hand up and down your back gently, the soothing motion causing you to close your eyes, somehow squishing yourself even further into him.

“i just don’t know how much longer i can do this, luke. i shouldn’t be feeling like this at the end of every day. i should be able to have at least one day to get away from that place and decompress, but they just won’t give me a day off,” you speak into his chest, not wanting to leave his warm embrace.

“you know i’ve told you i can take care of you, that you don’t have to keep working this job that’s killing you,” he responded, turning his head and laying his cheek on the top your head.

“and you know i’ve told you i can’t not work. you already pay for the apartment, i can’t let you pay for everything else by yourself too,” you remind him, having had this conversation several times in the last few months.

luke knows how you feel about him taking the biggest percentage of your shared bills, but he wishes you would just give in. he wants to provide for you, to give you the break that you so desperately need and deserve.

“i know, but it doesn’t have to be forever. quit this job and take a few months off before searching for another one. come to a bunch of my games this season and take some time to go back home and visit your family,” he suggests, knowing it’s been nearly a year since you last saw your them, not being able to get enough time off of work to make the trip home. “better yet, wait until next summer, then come spend it with us at the lake. or let me take you somewhere, just the two of us.”

he places a kiss to the hair on the top of your head, pulling back ever so slightly so you can lift your eyes up to meet his.

“i’ll think about it,” you appease him for the time being, not wanting to get into the full discussion right now. “right now i just wanna stay in this position for a little bit longer,” you move your head to bring your cheek to rest against his chest again, inhaling the comforting scent of his cologne.

you feel the rumble of his small chuckle in his chest, squeezing you before whispering a small “jump” while sliding his hands down to grasp under your ass, picking you up and carrying you over to couch as you cling to him like a koala.

he lays his back on the couch, bringing your body down with his so you’re laying on top of him while his arms pin you to his torso. you relax yourself into him, wiggling around just slightly to make yourself comfortable.

luke brings a hand up to play with you hair, caressing the back of your head. you bring your own hands to rest behind his neck, twirling one especially long curl around your finger over and over again, the warmness of his body and the repeated motion of his hand smoothing down your hair lulling you into a half-sleep, half-awake state.

luke says nothing, just laying there and holding you, waiting on you to make the first move to get up. if it was up to you, though, you’d never leave from this position. wanting to live and die in one of luke’s hugs.

after luke feels your breath even out and soft snores start leaving your slightly open mouth, he moves his hand from your hair to rub your back again, wanting to give you time to rest before waking you up to eat dinner.

almost an hour later, you stir, causing luke’s movements to pause.

“how long was i out?” you rasp without moving.

“about an hour. was gonna wait a bit longer before seeing what you wanted for dinner,” he whispered, his lips resting right by one of your ears.

“cuddles,” you tell him, burrowing yourself further into his chest.

luke laughs at you again, stabilizing your head with a large hand, preventing you from shaking all over with his laughter.

“you gotta eat something, baby. not good to go to sleep on an empty stomach,” he scolds you, knowing if he didn’t get food in you soon, you’d wake up tomorrow with an empty belly and a hangry attitude.

“please don’t make me move, L. the longer i lay here the more i forget about why today was so bad in the first place,” you tell him, fisting his shirt to physically ground yourself to him.

luke’s heart swells at your words, face flushing while a grin breaks out on his relaxed face.

“okay, i’ll give you another thirty minutes, but that’s it. then we’re getting up and ordering something to eat. we also need to get your stinky ass in the shower,” he teases, pinching the soft, exposed flesh on your side from where your shirt was slightly raised from all of your wiggling earlier.

you yelp and squirm around on him, brining your legs to hook around both of his, making it to where he can’t stand up without taking you with him.

“we’ll see about that,” you challenge him, nuzzling your face into his chest, focusing on the sound of his heartbeat in his chest to lull you back to sleep.

when you wake up the next morning, in the same position on the couch as last night, your stomach immediately starts to growl, not letting you forget that you didn’t eat dinner last night after convincing luke to stay there with you all night.

you were short and snappy with him, poking his face so he can let go of you so you can go shower and change for work.

knowing you were likely just hungry from last night, he slips out and runs down to your favorite bagel place to grab you some breakfast, making it back before you ever even stepped foot out of the shower.

when you finally came out of the bathroom, half-dressed with tears in your eyes, luke was immediately concerned, walking over to wipe the pooling tears and ask what was wrong.

“i can’t find my favorite blouse and i don’t want to wear another one. i could’ve swore i had washed it and hung it up, but i can’t find it, so now i’m going to look like an idiot at work all day,” you sniffle, still emotional from the previous work day.

luke assured you he’ll help you find it, but when he pulls it out of the dirty laundry hamper you almost go over the edge, mad at yourself that you didn’t wash it.

your tears quickly turn to angry ones, telling him to forget it, you’ll just find something else and then slam the door to your bedroom in his face.

when you come out in a very similar looking blouse to the one you wanted, he can still sense the hostility in your actions and attitude.

he slowly walks over to you as you unwrap your bagel, getting a little too frustrated when the wrapper is stuck to the cheese, this one piece of wax paper refusing to separate from the bagel.

tears start to spill over your eyes, causing luke to rush to your aid, tearing off the stubborn piece of paper.

“thank- thank you,” you speak softly through a hiccup.

“what else can i do to help you?” he asks, not wanting to send you off to work already in a state of unease.

“hug me?” you look at him with a pout, making luke laugh at the never ending cycle, but feeling the same about hugging him as you do, never wanting to step away from the warm blanket of comfort both of you create in these moments.

[rose-tea-and-strawberries]

Drunk Deuce Headcanons

Reader is intended to be female

Masterlist

So whilst I don’t think he’s a light weight, Deuce can get pretty tipsy really easily.

Deuce is a hundred percent an affectionate clingy drunk

He’s definitely a lot more handsy than he would be whilst sober. Deuce is a touchy boyfriend in general, and always has his hands on you even in public whether he’s holding your hand as you walk, wrapping an arm around your waist or shoulders or even indulging in the occasional full blown hug where he gives into the constant urge to just engulf your frame with his. He would love to do PDA, and you’ve certainly made it clear that you’re absolutely fine with it as well, but his general shyness, gentlemanly instincts, and drive to be a well behaved honour student that abides by the rules make it a bit hard for him to just kiss you in public no matter how much he wants to. So he just settles for hand touching and the occasional pecks on the cheek and forehead.

Having you close just feeds his protective instincts and the side of him that’s just so giddy and amazed to hold you. Like, wow, I’m dating this amazing girl and I want to touch her and she wants me to touch her. Is this heaven? Plus, being affectionate in a place where other people can see does appease a smug part of him that he’s not too ashamed of hiding. He’s not possessive by any means, but the butterflies in his stomach start flapping like crazy whenever he thinks about how everyone else knows that the both of you are each others - like, he’s known that he belongs to you ever since that incident long ago where you learned about his past yet looked at him with that caring supportive gaze but now you also belong to him. 

In private his urge to touch you is just amped up, seeing how he’s now able to do as he pleases without anyone but the two of you to bear witness.

He just wants you so much. Every second of every hour of every day, his head is filled with your laughter, your smile, your sparkling eyes, the melody of your voice, the tingling of your touch. You drive him madder than the residents of Wonderland.

Anyway, back to him being inebriated 

He’ll whine, clinging onto you like a koala, not caring about others watching as his face makes a home for itself in the crook of your neck, nuzzling against your skin. Strong, athletic arms will hold you close against him, whether he’s dragged you onto his lap or he’s seated beside you but has you in a vice grip with his arms draped over your shoulders like you’re wearing a Deuce sized jumper.

If you do manage to escape his hold (though, why would you??) he’ll follow you around like a newly imprinted baby duckling, trailing after you with wide pleading eyes and a dopey lovestruck smile and awestruck eyes. Having to close the bathroom door on his sad puppy eyes feels worse than a hundred daggers to your chest but you were honestly desperate to go at that point.

(Yes, he pouted outside until you were done and then immediately latched onto you the second the door opened again. He’s one of Professor Crewel’s favourite students for a reason)

Normally when Deuce is needy, he’s a lot more - well, I wouldn’t say ‘aggressive’ per say - but he’s more physically demanding of your affection, pressing hard and fast kisses against your lips, cheeks, neck in quick succession as his hands hold you flush against him but then again, needy Deuce only comes out in private. When he’s got liquid courage coursing through his veins, however, everything’s slow, savouring, all relaxed veneration and gentle adoration - letting him drown in his all-consuming devotion, even when he knows that time will stop before he’s even begun to be sated.

And he’s a lot more shameless about it, indulging himself all out in the open. The Queen of Hearts herself could be before him and he wouldn’t care, not when he’s got his own goddess to revere.

Sliding, his lips down the slope of your neck, pressing slow, drowsy kiss after slow, drowsy kiss only forcing himself to pull away from your skin when you call his name, so sweet and tantalizing, to look up at you with dark, besotted eyes and flushed cheeks before continuing where he left off. In his opinion, if your words stutter and fumble as you converse with your friends - who pray to The Seven that their next shot is much much stronger - then he’s on the right path

He’s a cuddly, clingy puppy but he’s your cuddly clingy puppy and you won’t have him any other way

Meanwhile everyone else is completely done with the pair of you and Ace is certain that the nausea he feels has absolutely nothing to do with the empty glass of alcohol in his hand.

[heartfullofleeches]

[Suggestive - food play mentions]

Birthday host clown darling-

Clown Reader who works at a circus themed ice-cream parlor and hosts for parties. They quickly gain favor with adults for their sweet nature and positive energy. It's easy to tell they're a lil shy in person, but in their element they become the center of attention and live up to their title as a performer. It's cute. Their fan club falls madder in love with their sweet clown watching the work their magic. When it's time to cut the cake, Reader leads the birthday person up to the front and asks them what they'd like to be drawn on the cake. They pour their heart into every piece and some of their admirers wonder if they wouldn't mind putting in a little more of themselves into their work

Reader one day to a party room with another request for their special cakes. The birthday person is a bit older than they're usual group but there's no age limit on fun. They even recognize them as a coworker off duty. Reader happily sets down the cake and starts to list off things they can draw for them. They've done rainbows, dinosaurs, smiley faces, hearts-

"You."

"Ok....is that y-o-u or the letter U?"

"I mean you. The frosting here is good, but I'm craving a different kind right about now."

The guest eyes fall on reader's bright belt buckle before looking up to meet their confused, flustered face - sweat wearing away at their face paint. Could they be any more adorable?

"I'm not quite sure what you mean by that - haha. I-I can draw you a butterfly?"

"I think by now you've gotten the general idea. Don't be shy- it's my birthday."

They do - but they just couldn't. Reader also knows it isn't their birthday. The thought of ruining such a beautiful cake in that way made it hard for them to even look at it. Why were they even humoring the idea in the first place- Customer satisfaction was important, but that's just so unsanitary and immoral and-

Clown Reader timidly tugs down their trousers, in disbelief with themselves for being aroused by the situation. Yan assures them its all perfectly natural and couches/aids them through painting the cake how they'd like it. They instruct reader to just relax and they'll take care of everything from then on. Clown Reader watches in horror as Yan eats the cake afterwards. That was always the intended goal, sure, but they never thought they'd really go through with eating their... The poor clown never understands how someone can be so depraved as to ask for something like that - especially when its order from them again and again even by other patrons. The room eventually just becomes the spot their stalkers fans go to love on their clown and get their just desserts from it

[miller-n-morgan-2]

Take Me Home

3. Worthiness

Arthur Morgan x Texas Red!Reader

A/n: Apologies for taking so long in between to repost these chapters, it's almost fashion week and I am CRAMMING everything my ass can handle into the next few weeks lmaooo. pls enjoy and let me know what you think!

Summary: Abigail gains a new friend and gossip partner to chat with over meals, and Pearson has had enough of it. Luckily, Dutch has something lined up and ready to take the kid out of camp.

Warnings: Mild Language, gun violence. Game typical violence. Robbery/heist shenanigans. Fluff and Angst, because who doesn't love that combo? Arthur and reader get into a fight and want to kill each other for like a split second but it ends fine I swear.

WC: 6.1k

“I think I could drop you where you stand.” You were all talk, now, and he knew that… but it still boiled under his skin the way you challenged him.  “You make quite a big to do of yourself… M’guessin’ that’s where most of your reputation came from,” he smirked, but he should know better than to taunt you about those men you shot dead. “Before I got here I barely spoke a word to no one… I got my reputation from shootin’ folks so fast they didn’t have time to repent to God.” 

You’ve taken to a new hobby. You’re not quite sure the word that describes it right, but to explain what it entails, a bit of background needs to be added for understanding. 

Abigail is borderline nine months pregnant. 

John Marston, the everloving man that he is, has taken it upon himself to steer clear of her in the last stages of her pregnancy. 

Given this unfortunate situation, Abigail finds herself eating more and more food to try and relieve the stress. She also finds herself ranting to you about the dimwitted man that impregnated her, because you seem the most open to listening without offering advice. Truth be told, you just enjoy the company of a woman that doesn’t shy away from you, or try to woo you over. It brings about a sense of normalcy. 

Now, in the past weeks that this has been happening, you’ve taken to eating at the same times as Abigail, shoveling more and more into your plate like she does. It’s now become a ritual, or as you would like to call it, a hobby, to sit and devour food while shit-talking John Marston as he’s away. ‘Keeping his distance,’ whatever the hell that means, when the woman you’re with is nine months pregnant. 

In the midst of this new hobby, Dutch and Pearson have had many arguments. Dutch was always less than concerned about it, whilst Pearson nearly threw a fit every time either of you came to get portions for a meal.

“I’ve had enough of it. They come, they eat, they leave! That new boy of yours hasn’t done anything since he got here but eat us out of our stock,” Pearson complained for the hundredth time. Though you’d kept up with chores around the camp, (trying to help Abigail pick up some of her slack) you hadn’t really brought any money into the camp, which was what Dutch brought you here to do.

“Arthur’s been trainin’ him well, I’m sure it’ll be no time at all before he starts runnin’ jobs with us.” Dutch knew what this was really about…

Pearson was madder than a hornet when John first got Abigail pregnant. Even worse when he found out she would be traveling with the gang from then on. Feeding a pregnant woman was sometimes like feeding two extra men… not to mention the fact that you joined her at every meal. He doesn’t want to say anything about Abigail, especially in the state she’s in… but maybe if you didn’t sit and eat with her all the damn time, it wouldn’t be as bad, and the rations would last longer. 

“He better start earnin’ his keep. If he doesn’t I’ll skin him, make a stew.”

Dutch let out a boisterous laugh, clapping Pearson on the back and shaking his head. 

“I have a feeling he’ll probably bring in as much as Arthur… There’s some sort of competition between them. I think as long as they don’t rip each other to shreds, they’ll be real beneficial,” He started towards Hosea, passing by you and Abigail on the way and tipping his hat. “Top of the mornin’ to ya.”

“Mornin’,” you nodded with a smile, taking a sip of your coffee before digging back into the bread and jam you both raided from Pearson’s ‘kitchen.’

He ducked into his tent, and you turned back to Abigail, listening intently to all she had to say. Today, she had news of an argument between her and John the night before. 

“It’s been all, ‘how do I even know that kid is mine?’ and ‘what if I don’t want to be a part of it anymore?’ since about the five month mark. M’startin’ to think that maybe I should’ve just left the gang, convinced some poor drunk dope from the town it’s his.” She gave her best John impression when quoting him, and as funny as it was, all you could feel was grief for the young woman. She was too young to even be thinking this way. 

You’ve not spent any one on one time with John, but he sounds like a real ass.

“As sad as I am to say it, Miss Abigail… I believe most of us men are stupid as they come. We can’t tell what’s right in front of us, even if y’all are screamin’ and shoutin’.”

“If that ain’t the truth…” she trailed, sighing with her head down. Even though she portrayed her sorrows in a comedic light, you could tell it weighed on her. 

You weren’t sure if you should even offer this, because you had no idea if you would even be hiding your secret this long, but the longer you go without revealing anything… you’re starting to think of your little secret more permanently.

“If push comes to shove… You can tell the kid it’s mine. Not too sure it’ll believe you, what with the carrot head I got, but if you want to…”

She laughed lighthearted, and sighed again, but this time out of contentment. 

“I guess not all men are stupid. You’re not even the first one who’s offered that to me,” she explained, nodding towards the outskirts of camp where an open tent fixed upon a wagon sat neatly kept. “Arthur said the same thing when all these problems with John started.”

You smiled, looking at his empty living space, barely anything to show that he occupied the place. He had a simple cot and bedroll, a small table, and just a few sentimental pieces here and there. He didn’t need anything fancy or grandiose to his name, just a gun and his hat, and he was satisfied. He’s even kinder than you thought, too, hearing it firsthand from Abigail. A good man, and a great outlaw. You found yourself longing for him nearly every day now, and it would only get worse from here. 

“He’s sure something, ain’t he?” You tried to be nonchalant about him, and it seemed to work in the eyes of Abigail, but if she’d known just one little thing about you, her entire mind would be changed. 

“Oh, yes. I’ll be damn straight with ya, I almost wish it were Arthur I met last year. Wish it was him that found me at the brothel. I do love John, but… he breaks my heart sometimes,” she let out, trying to hold herself together. She’d long since begun crying herself to sleep at night, pretty much since John decided she could sleep on her own. Now, though, was not the place to break down. You’ve been kind enough to listen to her, and she feels as though using your shoulder to cry on would be taking advantage. So she changes the subject. “While I’m on the topic of love… I’ve heard you got an admirer.”

Your cheeks grew red from embarrassment, and she thought that maybe you were blushing, but she didn’t know how far off she was. “I guess I’ve heard a thing or two ‘bout that…”

“Tilly is a sweet girl, I’m sure you both would get along fine,” she added, going back to her food. 

“She’s one of the kindest souls I’ve met,” you told her, trying to be as honest as you could without divulging anything she didn’t need to know. “I’ve just never…”

“You’ve never… what?” 

You shrugged, huffing a sigh and eating the last piece of jam covered bread on your plate. Already you could tell you’d be hungry again soon. “Never been in a relationship like that before.”

“I see. Is that something you think you’d want?” Her patience is why you liked speaking with her. Sometimes she had a short temper, but it was almost always warranted and towards those who deserved it. 

You took her question to heart. You’d not even considered a relationship since the day you ran away. Your self-found freedom had been from an arranged marriage. It had been your choice to leave that way of life. You never thought you’d ever find love in the aftermath of your liberation, but thinking about it now… You looked to Arthur’s tent, just a single glance to see if he’s returned yet.

“I hope so, maybe someday when the time is right. I just think that right now, I’m not so sure about anything at all, and it wouldn’t be fair to Miss Tilly to start up something I ain’t ready for.”

She sat and stared into your downward expression for a minute, meeting your eyes when you looked up. 

You smirked a little at her gaping expression, trying to make light of it. 

“I got somethin’ on my face?” 

“No,” she shook her head, knocking herself out of whatever trance she just fell into. “S’just that… I think you’re mighty wise for someone your age. And for a man, too.” 

“I reckon that’s a real fine compliment, and I’ll take it well.”

You both shared a laugh before going back to the stashed food for seconds. 

-

Dutch had an idea… a dangerous thing, but sometimes a very lucrative one. 

The worst part about this dangerous and lucrative idea? Arthur, Javier, John, and Bill were on board. It meant there was gonna be one hell of a party this afternoon, and no one in their right mind would have the courage to stop it. 

You were unaware of said idea until around lunch time, when Pearson just ripped you a new one for taking food before it was even ready. You shared it with Abigail of course, you’re not an animal.

Dutch and Hosea were making the plans for this afternoon, and came across you both sulking in the grass, just inches away from Pearson’s space. They grabbed some small provisions for themselves, as they hadn’t quite eaten much today, and you overheard some of their chatter. 

“I’m getting too old for all that excitement. One job here and there is all I can do anymore,” Hosea tried to reason with his dearest friend. 

“I need another gun or it doesn’t work,” Dutch sighed out, scratching the back of his neck as he thought of another solution. 

You stood up and peeked over the barrel you’d been resting against, leaning over it and making your presence known. 

“I got a gun,” you smirked, halfway joking incase he shuts you down. He hasn’t told you directly that he doesn’t want you riding with them yet, but he has asked Arthur if he thinks you’re ready… to which Arthur always replied, ‘almost.’ 

Dutch narrowed his eyes at you, looking back to Hosea, but the man held his hands up in mock defense. He was gonna sit this one out regardless.

“How’s your horse with gunfire?” he asked, genuinely considering your offer today. 

“He oughta be fine, otherwise I can take someone else’s.”

There was another moment of pause, and Hosea spoke up. 

“Sean would be happy to go, he hasn’t seen action in a few weeks.” 

You sighed, doing your best to act as if you weren’t upset, then started to speak loudly.

“That’s fine by me. I’ll just stay here and have lunch with Abigail…” you trailed, and immediately Pearson whipped himself around from his station. 

“No!” He shouted, and though you were partially joking, he didn’t want to find that out for himself. He’d had enough of you, and likely of Abigail, too. “As God is my witness, I will pack my shit and never look back… take him, I’m beggin’ ya.”

Dutch found his little outburst quite comical, as did you. He chuckled lowly and rolled it over in his head once more before deciding. Maybe what you really needed to learn was being thrown in the deep end. Hell, he knew what you were capable of. It was the very reason you stood on this ground in the first place. Now he needed to put those fiery trigger fingers to the test. 

“Son,” he turned back to face you with a look of sheer confidence, hopefully this didn’t mean the pressure would all be on you. “Saddle your horse, load up on ammo. You’ll be going with John.”

The smile you had immediately left your face. 

“Yessir,” you said quickly, leaving the group to do as he said. 

John Marston, the man you’d been shit talking for over a week now. Not to his face, of course, but to his lady it was enough, even if she was doing just as much if not more in sullying his name. 

You had a bad taste for him, that much you could say. It wasn’t going to be fun, but you’d prevail. You had to. It was time to start earning your keep. 

You found the rest of the men by the hitching posts, strolling up as confidently as can be. You enjoyed the baffled looks of confusion they wore, unsure of what you were doing here. Surely you wouldn’t be joining them…

“Howdy,” you teased, tipping your hat to them with a sideways smirk. Your young looking ‘boyish’ features gave them an inkling of annoyance with the look you wore, all cocky and arrogant for show. “Give me just a second, I’ll be ready to head out.”

“You’re coming with us?” Bill questioned, though it wasn’t out of sheer curiosity, but agitation.

“Damn straight,” you muttered quieter, done joking for now since they all seemed to be absolutely against you riding along. You got along with them in camp, why did they seem to exclude you now that a job was concerned? Why did they look like they were about to fight tooth and nail to keep you here?

You ignored their sarcastic chatter over your ‘scrawny’ appearance, and made ready your horse. You’d taken him riding several times since getting here, but he hasn’t gotten to see much action other than running down the side of the river bank. 

“What the hell are you doin’?” Arthur came up beside you, trying to gain your primary focus and lead it away from the horse… not exactly a hard task when you look like Arthur Morgan does.

“Dutch said I’m ridin’ on the job,” you explained, making it very clear, first and foremost, that you had permission to go out with them from the boss.

“When? Just now? Because as it was told to us, you weren’t goin’...” 

“I get y’all don’t exactly want me here, but he needed another gun. I happen to have one, matter of fact, and I’m pretty damn good at shootin’ it. I don’t understand your hissy fit, but it ain’t gonna stop me from goin’, so I hope we’re not gonna have a problem, here.” 

He kept his mouth shut. He needed to think and rehash his words in his head before he let something fly that he didn’t at all mean. 

“I’m tryin’ to protect you, kid.” He was even closer than before all of a sudden, and you had to make him the center of your attention once again.

“Protect me from what? I shoot faster than you, remember?”

You made a point, but he made a better one. 

“You mean ‘the one shot you know how to take?’ Is that the one?” He recalled your words from many days before, the day he began teaching you everything you needed to know. You’d been here nearly a month now, if you hadn’t learned enough already, you never would.

“Look, Arthur,” you turned away from him using all the strength you had, because dammit, you did enjoy looking at him. “I know you don’t think this is ideal, but it’s not your call to make. Take it up with Dutch.”

You strapped a rifle to your horse and grabbed its reins from the hitching post, leading the dark, glossy stallion over by where the boys were finishing up. 

“Marston,” you called, all traces of light hearted fun were gone from your tone, completely dulled and sullen from the loss of excitement. “I’m with you.”

-

Arthur rode with Dutch nearly the whole time.

You were on the caboose end of the cavalcade, and watched them talk up ahead. There was no doubt in your mind it concerned you, because that’s why Arthur is so high strung, so angry about this job. 

Javier gave you the run-down on the first few minutes of the ride. It’s a quick job, and shouldn’t get drawn any attention from the neighboring towns. Essentially, there’s a procession of carriages coming from the north and heading south east, and most of the folk traveling are fairly wealthy. The kicker is, all the valuables from each person are said to be stowed on a ‘safe cart’ in the middle of the procession. You’re not sure how they figure that, but you know Dutch has incredible sources. Using the team assembled, you’ll all have to separate the safe cart from the rest of the caravan, leading it off the trail and far enough away that it can be easily raided with no repercussions. The only downside? The safe cart is heavily guarded by several armed men and is manned by experienced drivers. 

Once Javier started getting into the logistics and details of the job, you zoned out, focusing on the conversation happening with Arthur and Dutch up ahead. You had no clue what they were saying, but the body language and facial expressions said a lot. 

Arthur likely expressed his concerns to Dutch, and thereafter, was told he need not be concerned… But Arthur was a persistent animal, he didn’t just dip his head and turn away. 

You think that Arthur may have listed a few points for Dutch to consider, and that the man did so, with the fact in the forefront of his mind that you were still on the job. 

By the time everyone reached the lookout, the two of them circled around to face the rest. 

“There’s been a change of plan,” Dutch called out, looking over every face and the horse they accommodated, and they lasted longer on you than the others. “John, you’re taking the frontside of the caravan with Javier.”

And just like that, you’d been replaced. 

“Where am I goin’ then?” You tilted your head in confusion.

“You’re with me, Red,” Arthur let out, his tone not nearly as angry as earlier. Now you gotta know what happened during that talk with Dutch.

“Yes, you and Arthur will bring up the back, makin’ sure there’s no surprises.”

You weren’t sure what to feel. Was he trying to keep you where he could see you? Did he think of himself as your babysitter? Why would he put up all that fuss just to give in as long as you rode with him?

“Alright,” you sighed out, acknowledging that bringing up the rear of the operation was still better than not coming at all. 

The rest of the plan stayed the same, and soon, everyone split off with their respective partners for this heist. 

You rode off with Arthur in silence to the waiting point, not daring to say anything until you’d been sure nobody was around to hear it. You weren’t going to rip into him about this, but you had questions. He clearly was concerned over your wellbeing if he fought so hard to make sure you wouldn’t be riding in, guns blazing, on your first job. You were just going to cover the rear, a measure of security. 

When you stopped just short of the trail, you hitched your horses, taking cover behind some bushes and trees to lay low. You turned to Arthur with a huff. 

“What the hell was that?” 

He was taken aback, but not jumpy about your outburst.

“Don’t start with this again, kid. I’m tryin’ to help you,” he crossed his arms, leaning against the tree and watching the road. It was still too early for the caravan, but he didn’t want to meet your eyeline.

“You ain’t helpin’ me, you’re holdin’ me back,” you grumbled, stepping on a small gathering of dead leaves, becoming even more enraged - for no good reason - when they didn’t crunch beneath your boot. 

“You’ll thank me one day…” he trailed, lighting a cigarette from within his pocket. You would have decked him in the face if you thought it would help. 

At first you’d been grateful to him, for seeing you no differently than the others, and even showing you the ropes to become better equipped. Now you could see it was all a ruse. He underestimated you and kept telling Dutch you weren’t ready. He kept ‘training’ you to keep you busy. You weren’t falling for that shtick again. You didn’t care how pretty his eyes were, anymore. 

“Where do you get off, Morgan? The shit you’ve been putting me through these past weeks…” you scoffed, finding it amusing almost just how unbothered he seemed to be. Maybe he really was just as mean as the town’s folk say. “I’ve been able to match or best you at everything you’ve thrown at me. Maybe I should just take you out of my way.” 

He chuckled, standing upright and creeping towards you with slow steps. His eyes narrowed, and for once, you felt you knew what it was like to be prey. 

“You wanna give it a try?” he taunted, towering over you with a threatening stare. Just seeing how intimidating he could really be, you wanted to back off. Of course, you didn’t. “You really think you could take me?” 

His voice was all too quiet, all too calm. The words he spoke held such heaviness, but it didn’t show in his tone. He was teasing you, and if you gave in, he’d likely give you a humbling. You knew he’d been eyeing your hand, as if hovered closely to your gun belt… so you dropped it to your side to defuse him a little. 

“I think I could drop you where you stand.”

You were all talk, now, and he knew that… but it still boiled under his skin the way you challenged him. 

“You make quite a big to do of yourself… M’guessin’ that’s where most of your reputation came from,” he smirked, but he should know better than to taunt you about those men you shot dead.

“Before I got here I barely spoke a word to no one… I got my reputation from shootin’ folks so fast they didn’t have time to repent to God.” 

Your dead eye stare caught him. He didn’t back down, didn’t waver… he was so staunchly preserved in his way of life that he didn’t even let it show in his eyes just how much you got to him with that line.

“Your twenty-one notches ain’t shit to me.” He’s sure that by now he’s killed hundreds, maybe thousands. Sure, most he shot in the back, but the number in which he didn’t still far surpasses your miniscule little twenty-one. 

“Then let’s make it twenty-two, yeah?” You didn’t plan on shooting it, but you drew your pistol faster than he could think, trying to put it against his chest to scare him, but his reaction time was faster than you had initially thought. He grabbed the gun from your hand before it ever neared him, and threw it into the grass behind him before shoving you down.  

“Damnit, Red! You have no clue, do you?” He stood over you angrily, looking at your frozen figure like you were an animal he was hunting. “You got a gift that none of us have. Hell, I’ve been doin’ this for sixteen years and I still ain’t as fast as you. You could be the best of us, but you’re too damn stubborn, and too damn arrogant. You’re never gonna get anywhere if you’re dead.”

You stood to your feet, staring at him silently. You didn’t have anything to say to him, and honestly, you weren’t sure what would even be okay at this point. He was still angry, but his arms were no longer tense, and he wasn’t seething through harsh breaths anymore. You turned away from him and walked to your horse, sitting back down by the base of a tree and tipping your hat over your eyes. This was going to be a long day.

-

It was approaching sundown when the caravan actually arrived. You’d been napping when Dutch and Bill first gave the signal. Arthur had been watching for it the entire time, and scoffed when he turned his head to you, finding you still fast asleep as if you had nothing to worry about. 

He took a few steps over towards your resting place, kicking your boot and startling you out of your peaceful slumber. 

“What?” you asked, annoyed. Your hat was still over your eyes, so he couldn’t see how dazed you actually were. 

“Sorry, miss… didn’t mean to disturb you,” he teased, his mood having cooled off since the hours after the fight you had. “Just thought you should be conscious during your first job.”

You huffed and stood to your feet, fixing your hat and making sure you hadn’t left anything on the ground. 

Arthur went back to the lookout position and watched through his binoculars for any signs that it was about to go down… you still weren’t one hundred percent clear on the plan, so you thought you might try and annoy him a little by reiterating it.

“So… Dutch and Bill are gonna close in on the sides, leadin’ the safe carriage away from the rest, and that’s when Javier and John stop it from the front. I got that right?” 

“You got it right,” he droned on mindlessly, trying his best to pay more attention to the small flaming signal in the distance. It’s getting closer, but until they put the fire out, there’s no need to mount your horses. 

“Then it‘s a four man job, they don’t even need us.”

“I s’pose you never heard the term ‘backup’ then, have you?” He snickered, still not even giving a glance in your direction. He was firm as stone in his resolve, and you figured it would be no use trying to entertain yourself further. 

“Didn’t take you as the ‘backup’ type…” you grumbled under your breath, mumbling some other incoherencies that he didn’t get a chance to hear. He was almost sure he saw Bill creeping over to the torch, and became positive when the light went dark. 

“Get on your horse,” he became quieter, more focused. You instantly figured it out that he was the type to zone in on his jobs, and maybe you could learn from it. If you really wanted to be his equal, you needed to learn to meet or best him in everything he thrives at. 

“You get the signal?” 

He nodded, “they’re coming down the trail, we gotta be ready to chase em’ when they come through.”

You both pulled up onto your saddles, holding the horse’s from moving too much. If your position was given away, they might derail the caravan from the trail. You reckon this many rich folk traveling in a pack oughta know someone’s gonna be stupid enough to steal from them. It’s why they have a safe carriage in the first place. 

Within a moment, you can see the caravan coming over the hill. It’s dimly lit as the sun lowers completely behind the mountains, small lanterns clinging to every vehicle on the trail. You look up to the ridge that Arthur had been scoping out all this time, and you see Dutch and Bill riding downwards in a rapid attempt to split the caravan. That’s when you spot it… the stone cold metal wagon, weighing probably more than all the horses in camp combined, and armed to the brim with men on every corner. They carry heavy repeaters, their heads on a swivel. They haven’t seen Dutch or Bill yet, but as they round the corner, they all raise their weapons, just for the sound of horse hooves. 

“Cover ‘em,” Arthur told you, grabbing his rifle off his horse’s saddle. You did the same, not hesitant to start shooting at the men in the distance. You had relatively good cover, and couldn’t really be seen, but upon seeing so much fire come from your side of the trail, they began offroading towards Dutch and Bill. 

“Do we go?” you asked, switching to your pistol as you prepared to let your horse run. 

“Not yet,” he held his hand for you to watch, leaning sideways to see around another tree. He had to make sure the rest of the caravan wasn’t following the safe cart. When he saw that most of them stopped in place, he flicked his wrist, pointing in the direction you needed to go. “Now.”

You rode quickly and out onto the trail, passing the other carriages. You could vaguely hear women crying and men yelling. They ain’t gotta be afraid for their lives, so long as they stay put. 

It wasn’t hard to catch up to the gang, as they had taken the remaining guards off on the way to stopping the carriage. There was one rogue horseman that Arthur turned and shot before he could get too close to the area, but other than that, they were able to get the damn thing stationary enough to rob. 

“John, hold him off,” Dutch commanded, watching the younger man hold his gun to the carriage driver’s skull. The man cried out for mercy, not knowing that Dutch would spare his life regardless. He was unarmed, and wasn’t standing in their way, so obviously they would let him go. The Van Der Linde’s did have a code, after all. “Arthur, you open the back.”

And so he put his gun away and strolled up to the back of the wagon with his head held high, happy this robbery went according to plan… until of course, he opened the back, and was unprepared for a heavily armed man to aim right for his chest and pull the trigger. Two guns sounded at almost the same time, but yours sounded first, and it was just quick enough to skew the aim of the dead man, and he landed a non-fatal blow to Arthur’s shoulder. Both men collapsed, but one was still alive. Twenty-Two…

“Arthur! You alright, son?” Dutch yelled, running over to check on him. You’d already knelt down by where he had fallen back to, trying to sit up, but failing because of the pain. You immediately put pressure on his wound, trying to stop the bleeding on your own accord. You ripped the bandana from your neck and tried tying it up, but it was just barely long enough to go around his entire shoulder and underarm. 

“M’fine, s’just a minor shot, it went through.”

“Brooks, you oughta take him back to camp, see if any of the girls know how to patch him up,” he gave you direct orders, and you nodded, helping a moaning and groaning Arthur to his feet. 

“How’d we make out?” Arthur asked, looking into the open wagon, where Bill and Javier seemed to be rolling in money.

“Pretty damn good,” Dutch replied, giving a pat to your shoulder, since Arthur’s is in disarray. “And Brooks?” 

You looked over your shoulder at him, a hopeful look on your face, longing for the approval of someone besides yourself for once. “Yeah?”

“You did good.”

And there it was, the signed seal of approval from none other than Dutch Van Der Linde himself. 

You and Arthur remained pretty silent on the ride back to camp, mostly because he was in a shocking amount of pain and distress, but he did his best to hold it in.

You hitched and unsaddled his horse for him, doing the same with yours before following him into camp. He made way for one of the ladies, maybe Abigail if Jack was asleep already, or Karen if she wasn’t busy workin’ some of the town men. 

“Hey,” you recognized what he was doing, so you pulled him by the opposite arm in the direction of his tent. “I’ll do it.”

His living area was just wide open space in the trees, unlike yours, however, he got quite a bit more elbow room than you did. Perks of seniority

“You don’t have to-”

“I’m tryna apologize, you should let me.”

He laughed a little, a soft smile on his lips.

“What’re you apologizing for?” He asked, sitting down into his cot as you rummaged through the supplies he had on hand. Maybe not the best stuff around, but to stitch him up and wrap it after, it was fine. He’d survive. 

“Bein’ an ass, and taunting you when I know you could snap my neck in one hand.” You were flat in your tone, too focused on threading a needle to put any effort behind your words. 

“I’d never,” he said, laughing a little. He seemed to be in a cheerful mood for just having been shot. 

“You might,” you tied the thread off and bit the end to break it from the spool. Very hygienic, you know, but you didn’t find a pair of scissors. “You’ve only just barely reached the surface for just how obnoxious I can be.”

“Oh have I now?” 

“Mhm…”

You pulled at his shirt collar, opening just a few more buttons until it could pull back over his arm. He didn’t stop you, or even wince, just sat back and waited for the sting of a needle.

“This ain’t gonna tickle,” you braced him, but as soon as you started digging into his skin, making the actual stitches, he was surprised. You were pretty good at this… the reasoning behind it was probably just another one of your many secrets, he’s sure.

“S’not so bad, actually. You do this a lot?” 

“Not anymore… but I was a little rich girl, remember? Did embroidery and needlepoint since I was a little kid. I kind of miss it, actually.” 

“A gunslinger misses doin’ needlepoint?” he chuckled, feeling the hole in his skin being patched back together. Now you just gotta do the other side. 

“Well sure,” you furrowed your brows, leaning forward to bite the thread again and pull his body so you could see the exit wound. “I used to sit on the porch of my house and do it with my mama.”

He felt sorrowful all of a sudden. “Were you uh… close with your mother?”

You nodded, not speaking in fears you’d tear up, or your voice would crack. The way you both were sitting, he couldn’t see the direct look on your face, but he understood it was probably a sensitive subject. 

Oh to think, what a life you may have led if you were not born a girl. You missed your mother, and your old friends from school. You missed being able to do needlepoint, and other more feminine activities. 

“You know what I hate most about this life?” you uttered, your voice shallow, but you didn’t seem to care all that much anymore. He seemed to take a genuine interest in your problems, and your personal feelings. It was more than you could say about most men. “I haven’t worn a dress in four years… and I really love dresses.”

This wasn’t the meltdown you saw yourself having in front of Arthur, but he didn’t mind it. He placed his opposite hand on your shoulder as you bit off the last thread to seal his wounds. 

“How about this… someday, when you’ve told everyone that you’re- y’know…” he trailed, nodding his head around for emphasis. “I’ll buy you a dress in town. Whichever one you want.”

You couldn’t help but smile. In the span of one day, you’d gone through nearly every emotion you possibly could with this man, but in the end, your resolve had again been weakened, and you found yourself falling into his crystal eyes once more. 

“Thank you, Arthur… You’re a kind man, you know?” 

He shook his head. “Not so kind to most.”

You knew not to argue with him, as you were learning, he was very self deprecating, and there was no changing his mind. You took a leap, unsure of what might come of it, but you wanted to show your gratuity some other way. 

You quickly leaned forward, kissing his cheek ever so softly, almost as if it didn’t even happen. When you sat back, his eyes were a bit wider, and his brows were raised. He seemed to be frozen in surprise, and words failed him. You didn’t want him to possibly find words that could hurt, so you stood up to leave, calling after him whilst walking away. 

“Goodnight, Arthur.”

And that would have been good enough, but your heart skipped a beat when your sentiment was returned. 

“Night, Red.”

Tags: @photo1030 @sheepdogchick @snoopysshark @strvberrydoll

[naturesapphic]

Southern Belle Wanda with a temper. Expected to watch the love of her life (reader) marry another woman. Everything goes to shit, simply because Wanda refused to do so. Like, readers dress had a tear in it, her wife to be’s ring went missing (👀), the pastor cancelled on them the day of. Yet it didn’t stop reader.

So, she doesn’t even wait for the fill in preacher to ask for objections, she just dramatically storms through the barn doors and pulls the reader from her fiancée.

I think it could end in a getaway, where R just chuckles and says, “took you long enough, Maximoff…”

The reason for their current relationship statutes, Wanda was supposed to marry rich, but she chose her hearts path to marry the heiress to a small town farm.

“Marry me instead”

Southern belle!wanda maximoff x country!fem!reader

Warning: little bit of angst, hurt/comfort, Wanda has a temper

“Stop the wedding!” Wanda’s yells comes through the whole church and everyone turned their heads to see a distraught wanda. She stormed over to you and grabbed you from your fiancé. Your fiancé gave Wanda a dirty look and pulled you back towards her. “You will not take my wife away from me! You are married to that rich guy, now you leave my woman alone!” She growled but that made Wanda madder.

~ Flashbacks ~

You were in your room looking for your dress to make sure it wasn’t wrinkled when you pulled it out of your closet to find that it had tears in it. You were confused and had your suspicions that it was Wanda but you didn’t think on it more I mean, she wouldn’t do that to you right? She’s supposed to be marrying rich…

~ flashback over ~

“She’s not your “wife”!” Wanda yelled out and pulled you back towards her. Everything made sense now about how Wanda was acting and why things were going wrong. You had a feeling it was Wanda but now everything came together.

~ flashback ~

Tomorrow was your planned wedding day but everything is going to shit, some people have cancelled, your parents aren’t happy about the girl you are marrying, and your dress has a tear in it, and when it couldn’t get any worse. You just found out that the pastor has cancelled on y’all at the last second. You were kissed and every time something bad happens, your mind goes to Wanda.

She better not be ruining this all because y’all couldn’t marry. She was the one who chose rich over you. Now as you were looking in your room to find your box that has your ring in it, you open it to find that there’s no ring it in. You were livid and you wanted to get married now. So you gathered up everyone and got a random preacher and got your fiancé.

~ flashback over ~

“Who do you choose y/n? Her? Or me.” Your fiancé asked you as she gave Wanda a deadly glare that made you uncomfortable. You knew how your fiancé got when she got mad and you were always terrified when she was. You have always loved Wanda and always will. “I choose Wanda.” You said blankly as you snatched your arm back away from your ex as Wanda grabbed your arm gently and ran. You ran behind her as y’all both giggled and went into her car.

“Took you long enough maximoff…” you chucked as she sped off into the sunrise. She looked over at your with a love struck smile and gave your thigh a gentle squeeze. “Im sorry it took me so long. I had to get rich off my back when I told him last minute that I didn’t want to marry him. He definitely wasn’t happy about it but I didn’t care. All I thought about was you. It’s always you. That’s why I did those things to sabotage your wedding.” She admitted.

You laughed and shook your head. “I had a feeling you did.” You said and she smiled at you. “Where are we going?” You said as you looked out your window to see trees and the morning sun coming up from behind them. “To wherever our car takes us sugar. It’s us from now on and I’m never letting you go.”

A/n: I hope the anon enjoys it! I hope I did everything right with your request. I hope the rest of y’all enjoy it too! My requests are still open and remember to stay hydrated and to rest! I love y’all

[nickfowlerrr]

After the last capital…

I’ve this scenario in my head :

Bucky and you are back to the old habit and arguing about something again… but you stand on the last step of the stairs and he is done with you (he wants to go upstairs to get his phone before he would leave) and pushes you beside but as clumsy as you are, you Trip and fell.

Bucky would be so mad at him self, because you’re hurt because of him again😩😩😩😩

hurt

pretty when you cry series masterlist

pairing: pwyc!bucky x curvy!reader

warnings: not really any? let me know if i need to add something pls! this fic is part of a series, and if you plan on reading it, please, please, please use caution and read all of the warnings!

words: 1.8k

notes: ten thousand years later lol thank you for sending this in! honestly i don't see pwyc!bucky even just lightly shoving reader especially after he made her fall last time lmao he's much more likely to just pick you up and move you out of his way instead but for the sake of the prompt, let's just go with it. <3 i'm on my laptop, so no emojis :(

"Where are you going?" you asked tensely, running around him to block his way to the stairs, the worry in your voice was evident, and even if it hadn't been, you knew he could sense the stress you were feeling. You stood on the last step, not letting him walk up the stairs. "You're not even trying to see things from my perspective," you accused, fully on the defensive.

He was fuming, blue eyes near scorching as he stared you down, jaw set and nostrils flaring. You knew you were edging too far, but you couldn't stop yourself, you couldn't let this go without being able to explain.

"How the fuck did you think I'd feel about this?"

You balked.

"I didn't- I, I don't," you fumbled for the right words, for an explanation but deep down you knew the truth. He had every right to be angry and you had no excuse. You knew how he'd feel about it, and that's why you tried to keep it from him.

"I'm not doing this with you right now," he bit out, moving to push past you. You were going to move to give him space to get past, not wanting to upset him anymore than you already had, but as you sidestepped, your socks slide on the wooden step and unsteadied you right when Bucky stepped up. His arm bumping into you when you were already off kilter and slipping on the step had you falling completely.

Your arm flailed out to grab onto the railing, trying to right yourself, but it did more harm than good as your feet slipped off the step. You had turned your body while trying to grab the rail and so instead of your ass hitting the stairs, your hip hit the edge of the step below you hard as you fell with a thud, and your elbow near simultaneously making contact with the step above you in the fall.

It happened in a second, and though he saw you wobbly, Bucky didn't help get you steady before you fell, assuming you'd get your balance. The instant he realized you weren't stopping yourself, it was too late to grab you.

"Jesus fucking Christ," he stormed, madder at himself for letting you fall now than he was about the argument.

"Ow," you huffed under your breath, grabbing your elbow and you sat up on the step, not bothering to look up at him. He was moving before you even registered him getting closer, pulling you up by your arm to stand. You were too embarrassed and maybe a little too scared to meet his eye, rubbing your elbow again when he let go of his hold on your arm.

You could feel his eyes dead set on you but still, you kept yours to the ground, swallowing thickly.

"Bucky, I'm sorry," you apologized, dejected. "My mom stopped asking about my love life a long time ago and I just- I don't know, I never thought to bring it up. It's not something I'm used to sharing-" you tried to explain before he cut you off.

"Stop," Bucky said harshly, your voice dying immediately.

You dared to peek up at him and were met with a torn look in his normally brighter blues. There was anger and hurt, and if you weren't reading into things, you'd say there might be regret, too.

"Are you okay?"

"I- yeah. I'm fine," you answered, uneasily.

He looked at you a moment longer before he continued up the stairs. You stood there not knowing what to do, considering following him or just leaving him be until he was willing to talk. You didn't come to a decision before he came back down not thirty seconds later. He'd shrugged his jacket on as he came down the steps and your breathing caught in your throat, heart rate picking up. Where was he going?

His narrowed eyes shot to you, and judging by the look you saw there, it was clear he was obviously still upset. "I'm going to the gym."

As he passed you, you grabbed his arm and he stopped on the bottom step you had previously been occupying. You were a step above him, allowing you to be about eye level with him as you meekly met his eye. You opened your mouth to say something but closed it when you accepted you shouldn't.

His glare eased up just the slightest as he considered you before he spoke again.

"I'm pissed off," he glowered as he said your name harshly, "I don't need your reasons why, I really don't want to fucking hear it.

I can't be around you right now. We're either going to end up fighting or fucking and either way you're gonna get hurt, because I am pissed the fuck off," he nearly snarled the reiteration. "So we're not doing this right now," he kept walking and you let go of his arm, watching solemnly as he grabbed his keys and headed for the front door.

"I love you," you quavered pathetically as he pulled open the door, stepping outside. He paused just a moment.

"Do you?" he shot you a heartbreaking look as you floundered at his response. Of course you did. He knew that. He felt it, undeniably. But, his words served their purpose. You fucked up and you hurt him. And he wasn't going to just let you off the hook this time and comfort you and tell you all was forgiven. It was the same thing time and time again. He needed you to deal with the fallout, alone, to get you to see that.

As soon as he shut the door behind him, he wanted to change his mind, go back inside, or at the very least tell you he loved you, too. But he couldn't.

He meant what he said earlier. He'd already let you get hurt on the stairs when he didn't help you the moment he saw you start to slip, something he never would've let happen if he wasn't so caught up in the anger and hurt swirling around in his head. If he stayed and you fought, he knew he'd say something without thinking and only make matters worse; and even if you didn't fight, he knew he'd be on you in an instant with the pent up emotions he was trying to keep at bay so he didn't go off on you completely. And he couldn't trust himself not to take things too far with you. You'd nearly passed out on him the last time you had anger fueled sex, he could still remember the nasty bruises he hadn't meant to leave you littered all over your skin and how sore you were for the few days after. The orgasms were incredible, but he didn't want to risk injury to you just to release some of the frustration he was feeling. That's what the boxing gym was for.

You'd talk when he got home and was a little more level headed, and hopefully you'd have come to a decision on what you were going to tell your family. He couldn't wrap his head around why you'd never so much as mentioned his name to them in the year since you'd been together. Like he was your dirty little secret, something you were ashamed of. The first few months he could understand, not even taking into consideration that you were soulmates and that should have prompted a quicker reveal to your family, but a whole year? He'd spoken to your sister multiple times when she'd facetime you and the entire time, she had no clue you and him were together. He wanted to know what lies you'd been telling her to avoid admitting the truth, but he knew that'd probably only piss him off more. He needed the time to cool off before he went back and had that conversation with you.

---------------------------------------------

The door to your room opened gently as you glanced at the time, wanting to gripe about him coming home so late, but knowing you had no right to be the one who was upset tonight. You sat up and turned the bedside lamp on to give him some light. You nibbled your lip as you watched him, his hair was damp and he was dressed in a new change of clothes. He had his gym bag with him as he dropped it heavily by the closet, certainly needing to pack it with a new post workout outfit for the next time he would decide to shower at the gym, like he obviously had tonight.

Probably killing time before he inevitably had to come home to see you. Another flood of guilt and regret rolling through you.

"I told them," you informed him softly, his eyes glancing over to you before he walked toward the bed, his face not betraying whatever it was he was feeling. "And I'm sorry-"

"Shhhh."

You obeyed his wordless request as he climbed into his side of the bed, your eyes intent on his every move.

"I'm exhausted, and I'm not ready to talk about this tonight," he said as he moved the blanket to lay down. "Just come here," he coaxed with a huff, pulling you closer. You were pouting without even realizing it. There was a lot you wanted to say, but you stayed quiet. If he still needed time before he wanted to talk, you had to be okay with that.

As he pulled you closer, you wrapped your arms around him, cuddling into him, having sorely needed his comfort from the second he'd left earlier.

He sighed heavily as he rested his hand on your hip, you winced almost imperceptibly, but of course he caught it. He rubbed at your hip carefully as you laxed into him, his touch soothing.

"I'm sorry I made you fall," he apologized, placing a tender kiss on your forehead.

"'S not your fault,"

"Me bumping into you is what made you slip,"

"My socks made me slip. Granted, the nudge certainly didn't help, but," you smiled soft and fleeting. "I'm fine. Not your fault."

There was a moment of silence between you then before Bucky broke it.

"I'm still upset at you."

You knew he was, but hearing him say it out loud somehow made your guilt ten times worse. You tried to pull away, wanting to give him space, but he held you tighter. "No, don't," he told you.

You stopped trying and instead buried your head in his chest as he held you. "We'll talk in the morning," he said, and you nodded against him in agreement. He turned the lamp out and when he settled down again, you tilted your head up so your lips were just against his ear.

"I do love you," you whispered before placing a soft kiss to his stubbled cheek. You settled against him once again, his arms holding you as your head laid on his chest.

"I know," he said, his hands running up and down your back. "And I love you. Now go to sleep," he rumbled as he fixed the blanket around your bodies, content to rest in your mutual embrace for the night.

You had a lot to discuss come morning.

[minho-hoho]

Yandere!ENHYPEN's reaction to their S/O slapping them

genre... yandere! pairing... yandere!enhypen x gn!reader! warning... cursing, yandere themes and behaviour, violence, small caps intended etc...! wc...1.7k! note... yall, no month has ever been so hectic im so sorry, like ive been trying to deal with my feelings (not abt tumblr, for the first time ever im starting to like someone sooo) and i got sick (again, yes im sick every two weeks) bedridden, and still am but its okay. just idk now expect more fluff since im more in a lovey stage bc of that little someone :>!

MASTERLIST

이 희승 Lee Heeseung

it all started after a heated argument about you not being able to go out with some of your friends

you were starting to get really annoyed and angry at your boyfriend's over-the-counter possessiveness and protectiveness

you just wanted to go outside and enjoy yourself, without him for once

it was basically a yelling match and you were starting to get seriously frustrated by the situation

suddenly, you felt your body move by itself

and in a fit of rage, your hand flew to Heeseung's face

it didn't hit you immediately, you were so enraged you didn't notice the shock and disbelief on Heeseung's face

you were breathing heavily and tried to calm yourself down. to you, the world had stopped for minute, you clearly weren't aware of your surroundings

but Heeseung made sure to snap you back to reality with his livid voice

“what the fuck did you just do?”

“what? it's nowhere near as bad as anything you've done to me anyways” you retorted, still on your high

he threw a death glare your way, that you didn't even notice

“i think that someone here” he came closer to you and looked down at you “needs to be taught a lesson”

and just like that, you were dragged to a dreaded place, still seeing red

박 제이 Park Jay

to be honest, you didn't how did you get so far in an argument

you should have already been locked up, but yet you weren't, you were here, screaming your lungs out, tears rolling down your cheeks, trying to put some sense into your psychotic “boyfriend”

at this point, you couldn't even remember what you were originally arguing about, you were basically buying time before getting locked up

but the more you argued, the madder you got

you wanted Jay to get a taste of his own medicine so bad, even if it was just a little, even if the consequences could be almost deadly

you wanted to hit on his ego, to feel even tiny bit embarrassed to be treated in such a way

you were quite weak, but you took all the remaining strength in your body and gave him the biggest slap

the sound of your hand on his face resonated through the whole house, and what you felt like pmmthe whole universe

it felt good, but you now knew, that there was no buying time anymore

you were doomed, and you knew it too well, but you were at a point where you were just waiting for him to end you by inadvertence

Jay forcefully pushed you onto the ground and took a few seconds to take a look at you

he took your leg and dragged you across the floor and stairs to the basement not even taking a look at your suffering self

he couldn't care less, all he saw was rage and madness, he couldn't believe how bold you were and made sure to teach you and unforgettable lesson

심 제이크 Sim Jake

you didn't even remember the last time you argued with Jake

it was always pretty sweet with him, but only recently you started to take notice of the manipulation

you started to notice how the way he treated you was far from normal, and it was rapidly but carefully bulding in you anger and resentment towards Jake, who didn't really notice the subtle changes in your behaviour

it was after him begging for you two to not go out on a date that you lost it

you started screaming right at his face and pouring all the contents of your heart on him, insults after insults were thrown, taking him aback

but he still got the situation under control, he knew you very well, and this outbursts of yours was going to end in his favour

again, he used his best technique, manipulation. he tried, but despite his best efforts, you saw right through it

and you managed to get even more enraged, if that was even possible

you took angry steps towards Jake and waste a second to slap him harshly

a wave of anger came over Jake, but he knew better to act put of anger. the last thing he'd ever was to appear as the bad guy

he was going to use your act to victimise himself and make YOU the bad guy

and that's how he put you back into your place, and filled you with immeasurable guilt

박 성훈 Park Sunghoon

you usually always tip-toed when you were with Sunghoon, which was all the time

but being with such a person lead to built up frustration and anger, that you always made sure to never unleash onto him, knowing damn well that he wasn't going to spend a single second trying to understand you

but today was different, nothing seemed to go your way, everything seemed like it was trying to push your buttons further and Sunghoon was no exception

everything he did seemed to bug you more than usual, and today was not the day you were up to deal with his quite annoying teasing

you tried to tell him to stop, but he didn't want to listen driving you crazier

after another remark from him, your body started dmoving on its own and you slapped his face with all of your strength

your eyes widened before his did, and before he could even compute your bold act, apologies started spilling our of your mouth, tears already forming in your eyes

but to your surprise, Sunghoon just started laughing, his laugh getting crazier by the second, scaring you but nevertheless, you kept the apologies coming until they almost made no sense

“shut up” and you immediately did, he then grabbed your hair and dragged you too your room

“you've gotten so bold and mean and for what?” he shook his head “i've done nothing but be nice and you repay me like this?” he tugged at your hair harshly as you were struggling on the floor

“i guess i should have known better, you are a brat after all. i hope that what you'll be going be through today will be enough for you to finally understand.” he took a look at your pitiful figure “not like i mind pushing you anyways”

김 선우 Kim Sunoo

where did this rage even come from? maybe it was from being locked away from the world, trapped with someone you absolutely loathed. who knew, what mattered was the fact that Sunoo's clingy behaviour was greatly pissing you off

his recent jealousy was way more overbearing these days, and you couldn't stand him being attached to your hip after acting in such deranged ways.

hell, everything he did seemed to piss you off in some ways and you told him multiple times but you were met with a pouting Sunoo which irked you even more

but this time it was too much

your head was hurting and the lats thing you needed was Sunoo yelling at you for a reason you didn't even know, you assumed it was because of his jealousy

you argued back, todl him to shut up repeatedly but to no avail, it only angered him more

and that's when you did it

you slapped him, you could say goodbye to your head because he was now screaming his head off and you of course, received a slap back

all you could do was sob uncontrollably on the floor, begging for all the screaming to stop

양 정원 Yang Jungwon

the only reason an argument with Jungwon got so far, was only because he found it entertaining to see you so engaged as if you were going to change his mind, he found you quite adorable like that

but now he had enough of seeing you scream, he did prefer seeing you docile and calm, and he would be lying if he didn't want his peace and quiet

after some eye rolling, he told you off, having not listened to anything you've said, not really caring

“did you even listen to me at all?” you said angrily, Jungwon smirked

“of course not, why would i?” he laughed “now just shut up before i get angry”

you were boiling inside, you felt frustrated, could nothing get through his head? if words didn't, maybe actions would

and right then and there, you slapped him, not with much force, you just wanted to get your point across

but if he was feeling nice earlier, he sure wasn't now

he didn't plan on punishing you today, but now, to him at least, it was the only option left

“i tried being nice with you but i guess you didn't get the memo, hm?” without leaving you the chance to answer he grabbed your arm and brought his face close to yours

“i suppose violence is the only way you can understand who's in control”

西村 力 Nishimura Riki

you two were passionately arguing as always

spitting venom at each other, fighting your sides for your dear lives, too stubborn to stop and apologise

you didn't even remember why you were arguing, you were just arguing to argue, in your minds, there was no way you were going to lose this battle

red with rage, you couldn't help but get even angrier seeing Riki shooting daggers at you

it only drove you further in you indignation and furor

you knew how he pushed every single one of your buttons, and this was the last straw

insulting your loved ones, especially after taking you away from them, was just too much for you to bear

the second your processed his words your hand flew across the room to his face, leaving a huge mark on his cheek

“i guess this shuts you up, huh?” you said snarkily, still riding your high seeing Riki mouth wide opened

“okay i don't where the fuck did you get your confidence from, but know that i'm going to make you pay for this” now your eyes widened and gulped as you heard him speak

he pulled your hair to bring you closer to him before speaking in your ear

“i'm going to make sure you won't ever use these hands of yours in such ways”

PERM TAG LIST! : @stacey-stonem, @sh1mzu, @axartia, @echantedrose, @leeknowbuttsmasher, @nikipedia07, @deafeningballoonnacho, @sristsblog

[brooklynisher]

People are asking about it so here it is!

The Spine Hc Angst Relating to Peter Walter I

This sorta turns into borderline a full backstory but aa who cares

Zer0 was abandoned and Rabbit was literally killed by Peter Walter I. I refuse to believe The Spine was such a perfect robot that Peter just left him alone.

I like to believe that after the success of Rabbit’s invention, Peter held The Spine to a much greater standard. So much greater to the point where he wasn’t being realistic. He knew he had the capabilities to program The Spine to be exactly what he wanted The Spine to be.

Two conflicting traits he gave were curiosity and maturity. Though curiosity isn’t inherently childish, you could only ask so many questions before people would assume you were born yesterday.

Because he expects The Spine to be mature, he doesn’t allow The Spine to indulge in any “childish“ activities.

One thing is that Rabbit thinks Peter prefers The Spine because he’s dedicated so much time into perfecting him, but The Spine thinks Peter prefers Rabbit because he seems like he actually likes her and she has many more permissions than he does.

Sometimes Peter will read stories to Rabbit to help her power down, but when The Spine asks to be read stories, he says no since The Spine is supposed to be, “More mature than Rabbit, and he doesn’t need them”. Rabbit might read The Spine stories in secret on occasion.

The Spine was not allowed to play with toys. If he was ever caught with a toy of any kind, they would be given away or destroyed depending on the quality of the toy.

The Spine was never allowed to read children books or watch children shows. He would have his siblings update him on any of his interests in media made for children if he had any.

He’s not allowed to play with his siblings, but instead, he’s expected to supervise.

Overall, he was expected to be “The best robot”. Whenever he wasn’t, he’d get adjusted, which he hated because he never knew what parts of him Peter was going to change. Most of the time he wouldn’t know what he did wrong. Which if he couldn’t figure out what he did wrong, the adjusting process would take 10x longer. The Spine would find himself overthinking everything he did wrong when he couldn’t be the perfect robot. This is part of the reason why he cares so much about the public perception of him.

During moments where he broke, he felt embarrassed and guilty. Peter would never tell him that his system failures were his fault, but he’d complain a lot whenever he had to fix them, making The Spine feel as if it was his fault for all the times he was broken. Like he was Wired Wrong.

Eventually, he’d start repairing himself. Which he got praise for, but if he ever made a mistake, boy did he feel like a failure. He’d be terrified of admitting to Peter Walter that he broke himself, but he would confess when he needed to because Peter would only get madder if he tried to hide it. Still, he was yelled at every time he made a mistake in fixing himself. The Spine would still keep trying though because he’d breakdown less when he attended to himself. His biggest issue is that he can get a bit too good at fixing himself and ends up overdoing it. Hence, over attenuated hydraulics.

Of course, after Delilah’s death, Peter was a lot more strict and critical with The Spine. There were times where The Spine was treated poorly due to Peter’s grief alone, but because he didn’t understand grief, he thought that his existence was the problem. He’d end up being hyper-aware of every little thing he did. Thinking that there was some sort of special way to behave around Peter in order to avoid setting him off. He was cautious of everything. His walk, his voice, the sound of the steam leaving his body, the glow of his eyes. He didn’t know what it was that would hurt Peter Walter I, but he always thought it was himself.

When Peter I died, the pressure to be the perfect robot only got stronger, so it ended up becoming a core aspect of his personality. To be the most mature, well maintained, and to keep his siblings in check.

It wasn’t until Peter Walter VI where he’d start to embrace his inner child. After seeing how well he responded to the rest of his siblings’ changes. He finally felt more comfortable with being himself. A tall robot dork.

[canirove]

Rice, Rice, baby | Chapter 16

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Masterlist

“Liv, you seriously didn't have to buy them anything for Christmas.”

“I’m their favourite aunty, Kennedy. I had to get them something” I say while watching one of the twins try to eat the wrapping paper from one of the presents. “Besides, thinking about what to get them and then going shopping has been one of the most joyful things I've done lately. Who knew buying kids’ stuff could be therapeutic?” I chuckle.

“How are you?” Kennedy asks me. “Like, truly.”

“I have good days and bad days” I shrug. “But the good days have begun to overcome the bad ones.” 

And that started just a couple of weeks after what happened between me and Declan in my car. Because what did he do? Make it Instagram official that he and the singer were dating. And what did I do? Have the biggest breakdown known to history.

When Alex showed me their joint post during our lunch break (kind of lame to announce it like that, but who am I to judge), I felt as if the hole in my chest had started to grow at lightning speed, swallowing me completely. I wanted to cry, to scream, to hit something. And I did all that at Tottenham's gym, where I ran to hide myself, and where Micky found me.

“Liv, what are you doing?”

“Looking for something I can hit!” I yell.

“Why?”

“Do you seriously have to ask why?” I laugh.

“Declan…”

“Yes. Him” I say, kicking a yoga mat and making the ones standing next to it fall.

“If you want to hit something, why don't you try this?” Micky says. “It's less harmful, gets the job done, and they won't fire you for destroying the gym.”

“What?” I say, turning around.

“This” he says, holding some boxing gloves. “It has helped me in the past and I think it can help you too.”

That first day all I did was cry and scream while he held the punching bag, letting all my anger go. But when I woke up the next day, my arms feeling so sore I could barely move them, I noticed that the hole was a tiny bit smaller. So I started to meet with Micky in the gym when we both were free, him teaching me how to properly box while I felt like every punch was closing the hole a bit more. 

“I'm glad to hear that” Kennedy says. “But you aren't looking that good.”

“Uh?”

“We have matching bags under our eyes, Liv. And last time I checked, you didn't have three children that drove you crazy” she chuckles. “Are you sleeping well?”

“I mean… I'm sleeping a lot more than usual, even taking naps throughout the day. But I still feel tired, it's a weird feeling.”

“Not so weird. I felt like that when… Nah, it can't be.”

“What can't be?”

“I felt like that before I knew I was pregnant with Leo. But it doesn't make any sense because you haven't been with anyone since before the summer, have you?”

“Yeah, that doesn't make any sense” I reply, not really answering her question. “It probably is just stress from these days.” 

Too much work, then the training with Micky after not working out for ages, the fact that I'm still emotionally healing, that I'm having to spend Christmas with Alex and his family when things keep being weird between us… That has to be it. 

“You could always ask one of the team's doctors to run some tests if that makes you feel better.”

“Nah, there is no need. I'm fine” I smile. “Do you want me to help you with bath time and putting them to bed?”

“Yeah, sure. You take care of Leo, I'll take care of the twins” Kennedy says. But there is something in the way she's looking at me, that tells me that she won't forget so easily about the conversation we just had.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“Liv, wait” Madders says behind me.

“Hey” I reply, turning around. “Doctor Smith?” 

“Hello” he smiles. 

“Great, you know each other.”

“Of course we do, Madders. He works with my dad, remember?”

“Oh, yes. Silly me” he chuckles. “Anyway, he has something to tell you.”

“Me?”

“Your dad and James have mentioned that you've been going through a rough patch and they are worried it may have affected your physical health. That's why they've asked me if I could run some tests and make sure everything is fine.”

Kennedy. She told Madders, of course she did! This is what her look from yesterday meant!

“That's very kind of you, but there is no need.”

“C'mon, Liv. It'll be just a blood test and maybe a peepee one, right?”

“Peepee?” I laugh.

“You know that's how Leo says it and now I do it too without thinking” he shrugs. “But that'll be it, won't it, doctor?”

“Just the basics” he says.

“I'm fine, James. Maybe a bit stressed, but fine” I insist. “It'll pass after the holidays, you'll see.”

“But what if it doesn't?”

“Then I'll say yes to those tests.”

“Promise?”

“Yes, I promise” I sigh. “Now can I please go home? My mum wants me to help her clean around the house, we are hosting this year.”

“Ok, fine. But we have Doctor Smith as our witness. If after Christmas you are feeling like shit…”

“He can run those tests.”

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“You didn't have to wait with me, Madders.”

“What kind of older brother would I be if I left you alone?”

“The not annoying one?”

“Meh, meh, meh” he replies, sticking out his tongue.

I had had to do it. I had had to get the tests done. And why? Because during Christmas things hadn't improved. 

I felt sick most mornings, and by dinner time I was so tired I could barely keep my eyes open. All I wanted to do was to lay down in my bed while watching period dramas and wish I got to dress like a princess. Oh, and speaking of periods… Mine was nowhere to be found. Which has only made the tiny voice that has been in my head since Kennedy told me she had felt this tired when she was pregnant, get louder and louder.

But me having all these symptoms could be just stress. I googled it and it matches. So it has to be that, not that Declan had better aim than all the strikers in the Premier League together after just one time not using any kind of protection. 

“Isn't it taking them too long? He said he'll have the results by the end of the day.”

“Maybe they were busy with other stuff” Madders says, resting his hand on my leg and stopping it from moving like crazy. 

“Or maybe there is something wrong with me.”

“Liv, no. Don't you dare going there.”

“Then why hasn't he called us yet? Why…” 

“Oh, there you are” Doctor Smith says, opening the door of his office. “Sorry for making you wait, but the system went down and it took it a while to recover and allow us to log in.”

“See?” Madders whispers.

“Please come in, Olivia. You can wait here, James.”

“Can't he come with me?” I ask.

“I would prefer to talk with you in private” the doctor says. That's it. There is something wrong with me, I'm dying. Or worse. My suspicions are right. “But if it makes you feel more comfortable…”

“It does. Thank you” I say, holding Madders' arm as if my life depended on it. Which can very well be the case. 

“Ok, so” Doctor Smith says once we are sitting down in his office. “All the tests came back perfect, but…”

“But?” I ask, grabbing Madders hand and squeezing it so hard I fear I may break it.

“Olivia… You are pregnant.”

[stormoflina]

Regarding szobo and Trent’s friendship. I think it’s one of those situations when u are an introvert person and friendship dies down. Not saying they not friends anymore obviously are. However, compare his friendships with other people like Jude he publicly shows support to Jude and Jude does the same if not more to trent tbh😂 he comments on every single Trent’s post. Trent doesn’t mind being seen on camera with Jude hence england content and story reposts . Where as Trent doesn’t like szoboszlai posts anymore for long time or comment in months either. I know Jude trent are a lot closer friendship wise but I think Trent did see comments and now you can tell he doesn’t like being seen on camera with szobo anymore even when szobo tries so hard to walk with him/grab his attention Trent ignores it and doesn’t want to be in same picture frames either or in training too he always purposely makes sure he isn’t. I don’t think they are as close as some think they are in my opinion anymore. Like Trent publicly shows so much love to ramsdale madders Jude hendo ect where as with szobo he hasn’t since September

Ngl, reading this kinda broke my DomiTrent heart 💔

I will have to disagree on the part where you say Trent purposely tries to avoid being seen with Domi on camera / avoids him. If you look at the fancams and bts stuff, they are still very much glued together. Trent seems image- conscious, but I don't think to this level. Yeah, he's an introvert, but he also seems like a kind, nice person, so I don't think he would do this.

It's also important to highlight that obviously Trent is going to be different with all the people you have listed. They have known each other for years and are national teammates. That's such a significant part, sharing the same nationality, speaking the same language, having been brought up in the same culture. Domi is also very different, much more relaxed around his national teammates. We joke around a lot about how he is being a "beg" around Trent, because to the naked (and DomiTrent focused,lol) eye he's totally acting like that, but , okay hold on.

I think I'm about to get a bit defensive here 😭

So Trent's mother tongue being English, him still in his boyhood club, playing for England, those are such huge advantages that players like Dominik will never get. I think it just doesn't show, because he speaks fine English and moves around like a very, naturally confident person. But still, to someone who has followed the Hungarian NT for years, he is almost weirdly """"shy"""" in some of the lfc content. You can tell English is his least strongest language and that he knows he is basically a little nobody in Liverpool.

Okay, Hungarian tax over lol. So, I think if any of the 'they are being forcefully separated' stuff is true, in any shape or form, it's probably only the sm team making a choice to not throw them under the bus for engagement basically. They obviously get along well, most likely not life-long besties, they have only known each other for like what, 6 months? But I like seeing them together, and especially with comments like the one, where Dominik said he often feels lonely moving to England, then saying how Trent was the first one to ask him out to hang out? That's so sweet!

Sorry for the long answer, I think I just really feel for Dominik in this scenario you raised, because he is even posting his dog, who technically is not even his dog anymore, so I just feel bad for him 😭

[bonefall]

If you flip the spade upside down and put it on Gorseclaw’s neck, it could kind of look like a tie

Hello anon with the most convenient ask in my inbox, you have been selected to receive a FLOOD OF SKETCHES

I had only drawn Gorseclaw and Ripplestar before, and I'm about to do a redesign of Larkstripe so that she has the "hearts" motif that her son gets. I did a bunch of sketches just to try and figure stuff out so, messy post

Glossary:

Ripplestar

Gorseclaw and Spottedpelt

Larkstripe

Birdflight, Marshscar

After I post this I'm gonna jump back into Clip to play with Cloudstar next

RIPPLESTAR

[ID: A sketch of BB!Ripplestar. The text points out his major features and reads, "Heterochromia: Amber + Brown." Smooth scruff, with an arrow that points out the shape. Ginger on 1 side. Deer-eared. 3 layers with an arrow that points out the three stacks of fur on his chest. Wooly, kinda like a half-shorn sheep.]

I've actually drawn Ripplestar a lot in the margins of my notes and such, so this design's pretty solid.

I change the side the hearts are on, plus the number of hearts, literally every single time I've ever drawn him lmao. It dozen madder.

What DOES matter though is that there's a HEART over his BRIGHTER eye. I use it as a bit of a visual metaphor, if he's trying to size you up or negotiate with you, he keeps you in the bright eye. When he trusts you or becomes comfortable with you in some way, he turns the brown eye on you.

So in most scenes where he's not talking to family I imagine he's not fully looking at his conversational partner. Especially on the Highrock as leader of ShadowClan, because the layout makes the leaders sit side-by-side. Might as well play with that simple logistic fact, y'know?

He does this because I imagine this marking kind of intimidates people. It's like the ginger of his eye socket has set his iris ablaze with fire, while the other is as cold as rain-soaked peat.

The ear on the "colorful" side is also orange. All of his orange is on one side, except for his tail-tip.

He's actually distantly related to Nightcloud-- his Honor Sire (who was known but not involved) went on to have a mate. So he's the half-brother of one of her ancestors, and Nightcloud has inherited this thick, wooly fur texture.

Again, I draw him a lot so this was the easiest one. I didn't have to decide anything besides that I made his nose into a cute lil carebear heart.

The drawing I did for this synopsis of Ripplestar's Rot was actually the first time I drew him, for comparison! It's fun to see what's been streamlined.

GORSECLAW AND SPOTTEDPELT

FIRST sketches didn't feel right.

[ID: BB!Gorseclaw and BB!Spottedpelt. They have long, curly tails, long claws, and bell-shaped heads. Gorseclaw has a sharp 'tie' on his chest, and Spottedpelt has a heart]

I feel like Gorseclaw's spades look too much like diamonds in this one, but I was really going for a tie.

I've been giving him those sideburns for months, so, they don't really fit the "shape theory" but I'm having a hard time removing them lmao.

And this is the first time I drew Spots which is a shame. I love a bad bitch.

If you look at my designs, you can notice that I have a few traits that cats from each Clan "tend" to have. They're all pretty genetically similar actually and there's a lot of crossings between the groups, secret or otherwise, but some traits just get selected for more than others, and StarClan is likely to toss them into kits. SkyClan has saggy skin (like a bear) and really bendy tails.

Don't think it's come through well here, though. In future drafts I'm going to try and make them saggier.

(Why? It actually helps them against insect stings and impact damage, like falling from trees and being hit by branches)

Then I went on to draft 2,

[ID: Second draft of the characters above. Spottedpelt is fatter, with "dapples" on her back which are actually spades, and a distinctive spade-shaped mask. The ears of both siblings are now spade-shaped, and Gorseclaw's tie is different, along with Spottedpelt's heart with is now more of a medal.]

I like Spottedpelt a LOT more in this draft. That's probably going to be close to the final design I do, I'm really vibing with the dapple-spades.

I DON'T like Gorseclaw in this one though, the face shape reminds me waaay too much of Dustpelt's familial face-plate. Absolutely going to revise that, probably making it more mask-like akin to Spots'.

Also very proud of myself for the spade-shaped ears.

Hate Gorse's tie here though, that's not a tie that is a stinkhorn mushroom.

But Spots' medal is excellent. Absolutely keeping that. She is a distinguished little war crime kitty

Still not fat and saggy enough. Coming back to this. I need to learn how to draw a primordial pouch.

LARKSTRIPE

I'm trying to redesign her and I'm losing :/

[ID: BB!Larkstripe. She's a very plain cat with a string of hearts from her eye down to her leg, with a heart-shaped nose, cutie marks, and a heart-shaped tail tip]

This was the FIRST first draft of the redesign and that heart chain is underwhelming.

It felt like too much of a downgrade from the diamond-pattern Larkstripe I did, and I'm worried that maybe it's because diamonds just look so much nicer in a "chain"

I feel like I see too many perfect hearts on chests in WC designs, so when I do them, I try to do something weird with them like what I did to Heartstar

So I turned hers into a little fur tuft splash. I like the idea tbh, I might repurpose it for another design.

[ID: A version of the above sketch with bigger hearts on the chain and a single heart on the flank, followed by another sketch attempting to make the stripe more "blobbish"]

I'm beginning to think that maybe I don't like the sketches because Larkstripe is sad :( I like when I can draw her angry, before the strikebreaking broke her

And unfortunately she is the absolute most tragic character in BB. They took the fight out of her. I figure it would be symbolically fitting for the heart shape on her chest to "break" after Dalestar's decree.

For those asking questions, no, she never joins Skypelt. She is convinced she did the wrong thing and ended up unleashing an era of suffering on the Clans by having Ripplestar follow in her footsteps, though she had no control over him.

She's a character who would offer her life as an example during trials involving the Cleric's Vow, especially since I've gutted Moth Flight in BB. She argues about how important it is to avoid birthing cats who will claim their conquest is holy in the name of their parents.

She would also have something to say to Mudfur, admonishing him for breaking his Vow so openly, even saying that he's responsible for Leopardstar and all of her choices.

Basically, Larkstripe is beaten. She is a very tired, shameful spirit who repeats exactly what Silverpelt told her, during her own trial. She's so grateful to be here that she acts with devotion towards it.

Hurt people hurt people and all

But anyway, I still feel like it's a bit of a downgrade from the older design for Larkstripe, so I'm probably going to keep playing with it.

BIRDFLIGHT AND MARSHSCAR

[ID: BB!Birdflight. She's a tabby with the spades motif, long bases stretching up into hears on her shoulder, side, and flank.]

I want her to look old and tired. She's got that Leafpoolyness about her.

She's technically the very first member of the Tigerkin family, and has those characteristic long-claws.

I imagine in Clanmew her name is actually Yassgafba, "Raptor preparing to take flight." I have this really sad mental image of a majestic hawk that keeps spreading its wings, as if to take off and fly away, but never does.

Fitting, because she waited her whole life for Cloudstar to send word they'd found a new home, to come and fetch her and their children, but never did.

While I'm at the trivia, yes, Ripplestar and her were very close. Larkstripe argues in StarClan that Ripplestar started his war because of her, but it's not true. It was Birdflight who made him believe that Cloudstar would never abandon his family; if they hadn't heard from him, something was very wrong.

She died before he became leader, probably of a sickness outbreak. She likely didn't take the journey because she's immunocompromised in some way, plus the two newborns.

She was given a place in StarClan, but I'm not sure if she followed Ripplestar and Birdflight into the Dark Forest. She DID vote to accept them though.

I think she's practical about this. Leave for the Dark Forest, and you loose your voting power in StarClan.

She sees that there are very few SkyClan ancestors left here, hears Skystar scoff that the others are fools for leaving, that if more had remained then the rebels would not have been damned... and understands the value in his words.

If there's any reason for the Tigerkin Curse (which I hadn't really been working with until now, tbh, I just chalked it up to Bad Mojo on the night of Ripplestar's last stand), it's probably related to Birdflight in some way. Which is why no one knows what's causing it.

I don't know why, yet, though. Maybe it's an accident on her part. She could be crafting their litters, but every time she finishes a set, she can't help but cry about how much the fresh souls remind her of the newborns that stopped her from joining her mate, and her kits in the Dark Forest.

It's probably why the PROPER curse might stop abruptly after SkyClan's return. She joins Skypelt as soon as it's an option.

[ID: BB!Marshscar. He's a scrawny, battle-scarred old tabby with a diamond motif.]

He doesn't have any markings in-canon so I tried to just make all of his scars diamond-shaped. I don't think it works, I'm going to give him some markings.

I like the ears though, that's staying. I might also borrow from the old Larkstripe design, give him those funky diamond-spikes on his chest.

I have barely talked about him, but he is actually very important to Ripplestar. They've been mates since they were young warriors.

I kinda want to make it so that Spottedpelt was Ripplestar's deputy before being killed that night, but it was always implicit that if something happened to them, Marshscar was next in charge.

This drawing is definitely when he's older and more worn-out, he lives a long life without Ripplestar, ruling ShadowClan reluctantly, half-heartedly doing the bare minimum.

It's a downer story, and I think it really fits the theme here that Clan Culture is about to get a whole lot worse before it gets better... but still I love the fact that Ripplestar's Rot just ends with the entire cast like

[ID: Spongebob sits at a diner with his hands folded, frowning slightly, disquieted and deep in thought]

Like there really isn't a happy camper in this one lmao. Nobody wins. Alexa play 'That's Not How The Story Goes'

[caluski]

again, a brief moment of self-reflection :-)

turning a little older yet again, i think its funny to see myself changing still. i wont lie that my life feels that much different from what it used to be - but other than boring things such as employment or housing or the lack of relationships, something has perhaps shifted in a bit quiet way, one you usually notice upon retrospection much later.

i think im still pretty much a hopeless romantic, in that stupid, proud, dramatic way that makes me absolutely fucking insufferable. everything must be either grand or tragic. obviously, its not a bad thing in itself, but it does make me far too self indulgent for my own good. i know i have to learn patience towards others, and domesticate my solitude, otherwise soon life will drive me even madder... there is a lot to reconsider when it comes to what i expect from life and people in my life, even if it feels like i overthought everything to death and back already.

the big goals for 29th year is definitely going back on meds. or should i say, finding meds that actually work for me. theres a lot that i want - such as moving out and becoming independent, having a stable job i dont have to worry about losing, or finding companionship in my daily life - but i want to be realistic just once. last year, i remember finding out about the layoffs right before summer ended, and i thought - my next job will be the one that fixes everything. obviously, its not, not yet at least. even the minimum wage aside, im annoyed with lots of aspects of it, so its far from perfect. i wish i could land a safe, corporate job that pays enough to keep me afloat on my own, but, well.

but like, other than all my actual flaws, i dont think my attempt to romanticize everything is that bad in itself. it does make good-but-normal things seem far too good to be true (like having friends, being loved, having a safe home - how can it ever be real for me, if its so beautiful???), but other than that, i do like the way it makes me feel. i like treating every coffee like the biggest blessing of the day. i like how good music makes me tear up. i like it when days are so good, theyll feel like a dream when i look back at them. i just have to keep it under a little bit of control. i have to get used to the thought that the world is not out there to cater for me, that i am not in fact the center of the universe, that everything goes on no matter what. i always liked the thought of being not the main character of life, but more of a best friend or love interest; youre still there, you can participate, you can be significant if you put your mind to it, but the world wont stop for you. also, i do like the sentiment of someone's main purpose in life being both giving and receiving of love. i might lack the brains and beauty for much more, but love, i think everyone is capable of, no matter what - and it includes me, in the end.

i want to spend more time taking pictures and listening to music. going to cafes and having long walks. i want to try going back to drawing. i wanna get better at writing - god, if this wall of text alongside all my other silly little posts arent a proof of that...... - which of course, means reading more, too. i wanna hear more live music. local, or maybe the big performances, if artists i like come over to warszawa or kraków or something. also, i wanna travel a little more. even if just to sit in a local cafe and watch the traffic. i wanna visit żmija (if youre reading this, i swearrrrrrr im not trying to invite myself over - but maybe if im in kraków or something, we could see each other closer to your home. which could also be fun because its such a big city, so much to see, so many cafes to experience. maybe a gay bar to visit? are there any worth dancing in?). and i do wanna continue collecting vinyls - slowly, as they are so costly, but still. and i do wanna become more outgoing, i want to take more risks, even if it leaves my stupid little heart sore and exposed.... rejection is inevitable, right? and i do want to catch up with romantic experiences, too. i want to feel something for someone again, even if its one-sided and desperate and miserable. but i miss it so badly, so so badly. i want to have someone to pour out my affection on - consensually. i want someone to want to be loved by me as i am, with all this mess of loud, intense feelings, without being freaked out. or maybe getting freaked out in a good way.

anyway. such a gloomy day calls for love & food playlist promo. have a good evening everyone! mwah

[ezra-editss]

"Dean doesn't reciprocate" MY ASS

I'm just kinda gonna write down my thoughts about this. I'm in season 7 now, I know what happens in the very last episode, but nothing else so I don't read any posts about the show here yet :) (just so yk and don't accidentally spoiler me) Oh and I do this mostly out of memory and some notes that I took, so this might be a little chaotic :,)

Okay, so the whole season 6 fight was crazy to me. The way Cas was watching while Dean kept on defending him. And he knew how much Dean trusted him. ("The worst part was Dean. He was trying so hard to be loyal, with every instinct telling him otherwise.") It hurt him, but the whole time he was, again, protecting Dean. And yes, he hurt Dean, but I think it was as bad for Cas to hurt Dean, as for Dean to be hurt.

Then, Dean apologizing for the others? They (thought they) were wrong and Dean had kept on trusting Cas, so why was it him who apologized? Because he knew it meant more to Cas when he did it? Idk.

Cas wasn't able to lie when he looked in Dean's eyes.. come on? Also, the fact Dean wasn't actually mad when he found out was really interesting. He was just extremely sad. Yes, his trust got broken and maybe he was just tired of it all, but it didn't seem like that to me, I felt like he usually got madder.

I love how they always share those sad looks when they go apart after the fights btw, such a best buddys thing to do.

It was really hard for both of them. We can see that Dean can't sleep that night and that Cas comes back to talk to him alone, because it only matters to him that Dean understands.

Oh and the "I'm doing this for you, Dean." I don't even need to explain his motives, because he reveals them himself.

Then the scene from my edit. (at the top) (it's kinda laggy, bc it's slow-motion, but anyways) They both have teary eyes a lot, but this is different. Dean turns aways because he knows he's gonna cry and Cas disappears before he really starts crying, but they are both fuckin crying about this. They're both just sad and want this to end. Even when Dean said he's gonna stop him and so on, it was way less threatening than usually. And Cas kept coming back when Dean was in danger.

But Dean still cared as well. In the first episode of season 7, when Cas asks for help, he pretends he doesn't care about him anymore for a bit, but you can clearly see that he still does. You at least can see it when he thinks Cas is dead. He's devastated.

It's kinda funny how Bobby's there but Cas very obviously only cares to make it up to Dean. Like he always says "they're my friends" but in reality he means Dean.

AND THEN.. Cas tries to protect everyone else again and sends them away but DEAN STAYS. I think he knew that there wouldn't be anything he could do, but it didn't matter.

Cas dies again. (give my man a break, please) Dean keeps the god damn coat? I think he might've done it, because he was hoping that Cas would come back again. Anyways, scene was devastating.

In the judge/court episode about Dean's guilt, I immediately hoped Dean didn't feel guilty about Cas too, but was pretty sure he did. My worries were confirmed in episode 5.

So yeah, I suppose that's the part where I am, I guess I have to wait 'till Cas comes back now :,)

I don't think anyone read all this, but I hope I didn't make any grammar mistakes, bc English isn't my first language, so I sometimes get stuff mixed up (I definitely made the tenses confusing). Anyways, rant end.

[highfantasy-soul]

NATLA - Episode 4: Into the Dark (3/3)

[Masterlist of my NATLA thoughts]

An explanation of what I'm doing here and my history with ATLA.

Of course, full spoilers ahead.

<previous/next>

Sokka's instincts make an appearance in this episode too as they're navigating the cave - love that Sokka is smart and figures out the stones light up in the dark - and even though his plan goes awry, just like in the animated show, sometimes his instincts are right, sometimes they're wrong - he's delving more into using his brains to help the group rather than just his battle prowess. Here is where the character beats between him and Katara in animated episodes like 'Jet' come to fruition alongside their interactions last episode.

In the animated version, they have a lot of time (ie beginning of every episode, so 20 times) to have the characters poking fun and mocking each other, but in only 8 episodes, that can feel like tonal whiplash if the characters swing from mocking to learning the lesson then back to mocking then learning the lesson then back to mocking then learning the lesson all in one episode - structurally, it just wouldn't work. Merging Katara's frustrations with Sokka always needing to be in charge and 'he knows best' into these two episodes really let that dynamic breathe, deepen, and be resolved in a satisfying way. They have a really sweet sibling moment reminiscing about home, and Sokka urges them to continue on, doing his best to be a good leader.

They both get to explain why they fell in with the people they did, how Sai helped Sokka and Jet helped Katara. The idea that we don't get through life alone, we need friends and mentors to help us along the way, is a huge part of 1) this episode with Aang and Bumi and 2) the entire series. I like how Katara reminded Sokka that when he was thrust into a leadership position, he didn't have anyone to help him through it - he was just given command and left to his own devices. It's a concept that comes up in the animated show too and I'm glad they're giving it time to breathe this season. Again, we're setting the foundation for character's core traits through the series, Sokka's being: a leader, strategist, inventor, and warrior.

I like that it's sibling love that saves the day in the caverns - I mean, first off, the power of MUSIC is what somehow got the badgermoles to guide them through the tunnels the first time, it makes sense that they'd be a bit more intellectually advanced and be able to sense emotions and follow verbal commands. And second, love the switcharoo with it not being the crystals but rather an emotional through-line. The OG was a bit eehhh for me because honestly, teasing that a KISS would light the way out (and some in the fandom STILL believing that's what got them to safety) is just….eewww to me. Very unnecessary especially since Katara and Aang are literal children. I'm more for them developing a strong platonic bond while they're this age because it really didn't feel organic to me for Aang and Katara to get together after Aang's whole crush that started from the first moment he saw her. It was a little too 'ok, you saved the world, now here's your reward: a woman' in the og for me. Not to say they can't fix that ship, but cutting it for now I think is a good move.

I do think this episode had some of the best moments and some of the most 'eh' storylines for me, so a mixed bag. I loved everything except the Bumi storyline, but again, I get what they were going for with it, I just think the execution could have been better - and by that I mean fully nix the 'crazy king' aspect of Bumi (which would have made the internet even madder than it already is) and just fully reshape his character to fit the tone of the live-action. Characters like Bumi are just SO over-the-top it's really hard to get that balance right in live-action.

But as far as criticisms go, it's pretty mild compared to a lot of plotlines I forgive in other favorite shows, so - eh *shrug* I'll live.

These past two episodes were quite annoying to analyze beside the OG because I'm rewatching the animated version to make sure I get specifics right and these episodes covered are all so late in the season! Omashu happens, then I had to go through storylines that show up later in the live-action but happen earlier in the animated. But, rewatching the OG is always good for me and I stand by the assessment that nothing got messed up plot-wise moving those later storylines up to here, rather I think it built an even stronger foundation for the heavier stuff to come like the Spirit World and the Blue Spirit storylines.

[abbatoirablaze]

Burning Up, Chapter 9

Word Count:  1.6k

Warnings:  angst

“It happens,” Laurie shrugged sadly as she bit her lip and looked to Steve’s wife, who sadly nodded as well, “it happens every time a new captain is chosen and the calendar comes out.”

“It nearly broke Steven and I up,” she sighed, admitting the sad truth while her toddler laid sleepily on her shoulder.  She looked at the little girl and brushed some of her hair behind her ear, and she yawned, “honestly…if it wasn’t for me cleaning my stuff out of the drawers and finding an engagement ring hiding in the back, I probably would have left…”

“You were going to leave Steve?” Laurie gasped, finally looking at the woman, “you-you’ve never told me that…”

“I didn’t think there was much of a point in saying anything,” she shrugged, “you know…I remember how you told me what saved your marriage was you finding out you were pregnant with Jacob…and me and Steve weren’t trying to have babies just yet…he’d just let me put stuff at his place…and we’d only been dating ten months.”

“Well what did you do?” you asked gently.

“What any insane woman would do,” she smiled, thinking back to the memory, “I took the ring and marched myself down to the firehouse.  Nearly everyone was out getting groceries.  Bucky and Steve had stayed at the firehouse in case anyone needed anything…and when I got there, all I heard was Steve telling him how much he loved me, but how he thought becoming captain might have been a mistake because of the calendar.  He was asking Bucky what he thought about me.”

“Well…” you hinted, wanting to hear how the story ended, “what happened then?”

“I heard him talk about everything…I just stood there, listening to it,” she admitted, “I was standing there, just waiting behind them until the guys came in the front door.  Johnny acknowledged me and I swear I’d never seen Steve move so fast.  He snapped around and went pale.  Well…I told him I heard everything…and like a dumbass I had the box in my other hand.”

“That’s the day Steve proposed,” Laurie smiled, finishing up the story, “I remember Andy telling me that he proposed that day that you found the box. But I didn't know about the other part of the story.”

“He did,” she smiled, “in front of everyone.  He came right up to me and apologized for the calendar, and how women had been coming after him.  But he told me that he loved me.  That he wanted only me.  And he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him.”

“Andy said it was so cute.”

She looked back to her daughter and sniffled a little bit, then brushed her hair out of her face once more, “which is exactly why you shouldn’t give up on Curtis…the transition is rough, and the women are ruthless.  But we can both see how much you mean to him…”

“He’s missed every date night since that night at the restaurant.”

“Talk to him about it!” Laurie agreed, “you said it yourself.  You had started to drift away from him because of it."

“Yeah…”

“Just have to talk to him,” you muttered once more as you gathered your courage and your purse from the passenger seat and threw it over your shoulder, “I’ve talked to Curtis before…we talk all the time.  I’m living with him….just have to say…”

But your words trailed off the longer you sat in your car and watched the firehouse.  While Laurie and Steve’s wife had assured you that the women would be dying down, you weren’t so sure.  They had continued to swarm the firehouse, and if it was even possible, you felt like there was even more women around it. 

Despite that, you got out of your car and started making your way through the hoard of women.  While a good bit of them were there for the rest of the guys, every sign that had Curtis’ name on it, every woman calling for him, just made you madder. 

“CURTIS!”

“CAN WE GET A PICTURE!”

“HAVE MY BABIES, CAPTAIN CURTIS!”   

“Aright, alright, back it up!”

Your breath caught in your throat.  The woman pushing the other women was none other than the woman that had pushed you out of our own date with your boyfriend.  You felt your throat pinching together, and tears welling up in your eyes. 

“I need to see Curtis…” you tried to speak up, past the other women.  But she pushed you back again.

“You all don't need to see the captain…” she all but spat, “we’ve got training to do.  All of you groupies need to leave…”

“I’m his girlfriend!”

She scoffed, not even bothering to look at you as she ushered the group of women further out of the firehouse, “all of you would like to be his girlfriend, but Captain Curtis doesn’t have one!  You all need to leave!”

Your heart broke at her words. 

You hadn’t expected her to say that.  And you hadn’t expected it to affect you like it had. You knew that she knew who you were, but the words coming from her felt almost like a dismissal of your entire relationship.

Curtis had no girlfriend.

Somehow, the words felt like a dagger straight through your chest. 

But you didn’t have the heart or energy to fight it.  So, with the other girls, you left, making your way back towards your car.  Maybe this was how your story was supposed to end with him.  Just some fun that turned into something more. 

A tear streamed down your cheek as you walked away, your hand sliding down to your stomach.

And then all at once, you felt like you were being whipped around.  You had been so lost in your own thoughts that you hadn’t noticed Curtis.  You hadn’t noticed how he had made his way to you, and was now holding you by your waist. 

He looked out of breath as he stared at you.

“Baby…”

You cringed as the solo word left his mouth, “Curtis…I-I shouldn’t be here.”

The world seemed to fade away as you looked into his desperately sad eyes, “What are you talking about?”

“Curtis…let me go,” you begged slowly, “coming here…th-this was a mistake.”

“Babe…”

“Captain…is this woman bothering you?”

Curtis gave her a sideways look, “This is my girlfriend…she couldn’t be both-“

“Ex girlfriend.”

His eyes shot to yours.  Confusion laced his features, “W-what are you talking about?”

“Our relationship feels like it’s a chore, anymore, Curtis,” you admitted sadly, pulling out of his grasp, “I-I thought we could fix it…but we can’t.  I-“

“We can make it work…”

“No we can’t Curtis.  This is all too-“

“I can change!” he said quickly, cutting you off, “whatever it is that I need to do, just tell me…I’d do it in a hearbeat and you-“

"Curtis, there's noth-"

"I'll leave the station if that's what you want!" he said quickly, cutting you off, "just say the word, baby. I don't want to los-"

“I cheated on you.”

The lie slipped far too easily from your lips.  His grip on you faltered and you finished removing yourself from his arms.

“Wh-what?”

“I cheated on you,” you repeated, unable to meet his eyes anymore.  You looked over his shoulder, and saw his brothers standing just inside the firehouse, “i-“

“What?” he all but roared, “Bullshit!”

“It was with me!” Johnny said quickly, stepping forward as he placed himself between you and Curtis. You wished you could give him a look, begging him not to interfere, but it was too late. You were, however, grateful. You knew that if no one had stepped in you would admit that you were lying. You would admit that you came down to ask him to leave the company because of your own news. But you only bit your lip, holding it in as Johnny continued, “she came by to tell you that she’s leaving you…and she’s going to move in with me…right baby?”

You gave him an unsure look, but he only nodded, hooking his arm around your waist.

“Baby…”

“Tell him, baby…” Johnny said quickly, shooting you another look, “it’s okay…”

You frowned as you stared at Johnny who sat across from you in the booth, “you didn’t have to do that, you know…”

“I know the look you had,” he said with a frown as he held the beer he was nursing against his bruised eye, “you couldn’t have left if you wanted…would have admitted you lied about cheating and then told him you couldn’t do it…”

“He gave you a black eye and a busted lip…”

“He needed to feel that rage…he’ll get over it when he realizes it wasn’t true,” he shrugged, “and by that time you’ll have the time you need to heal and move on…”

You bit your bottom lip, stopping the tears from flowing, “Johnny…wh-what do I do?”

“Well, first thing’s first,” he sighed, sliding the untouched beer away from you, “have you been to the doctor yet?”

You shook your head, a lone tear sliding down your cheek. You were amazed at how in such a short time, Johnny had become your best friend, and able to read you so easily, “I-I haven’t.”

Johnny put his beer down and reached out, taking your hands in his, “We’ll get through this, sweetheart…we will.  I promise. I've got a friend who can look at you in the morning...but I'm serious...you're moving in with me. Now that you walked away from Curtis, there's no going back, and I know you don't have anything saved up or in mind. I've got a few extra bedrooms at my house.”

“Thank you, Johnny.”

"Of course, sweetheart," johnny nodded sadly, "I'll have Reed and Ben take Curtis out tomorrow so that we can go back to the apartment and pack some stuff up for you too...okay?"

"Yeah...okay, Johnny."

Chapter 10

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