#i just want an interesting fiction book to read

[maul-of-shame]

Oh my god you’re out here acting like you’re some badass queen for having a horrible ship but you just sound like a middle aged bored mom who read a Colleen Hoover book and now makes it their entire personality because they’re bored. Also what’s with the big red letters? You don’t sound like a mean girl who’s making a point, you sound like a loser who’s in desperate need of a dose of reality.

Galadriel is like an older sister (or even a mother figure) to Elrond, which is why their relationship is so comforting. You trying to ruin that does make me upset cause I’m tired of people having no sense of media literacy. Not everything has to be shipped and definitely not something as dumb as this.

Also, fuck that stupid Sauron/Galadriel ship. It’s straight up people romanizing abuse and it’s disgusting. Canon!Galadriel would have never fallen for Hallbrand’s shit or Sauron’s charms and the way the Rings Of Power writers took a strong, mature female character and made her in to an immature schoolgirl (when she’s literally one of the oldest elves, older than Gil-Galad) is fucking stupid and actually misogynistic. I’m so tired of people taking strong female characters and watering them down to make them into a love interest for the villain or make her a cringy villain too. It’s dumb

So yeah, fuck Rings Of Power for destroying canon and destroying Galadriel’s character, fuck those Sauron/Galadriel shippers for being weird, and fuck you for taking a comforting, platonic relationship ship between two characters who have both been through a lot of shit and romanticizing it.

Also, fuck you for erasing Celebrian. I know you probably can’t comphrehend a female character being great without a sword in her hand so take that sword and shove it up your ass.

A word of advice, don’t touch the Lord Of The Rings when you clearly do not understand any of the characters, their relationships, or the meaning behind them. Just write your own book at this point with your own characters and leave the beautifully written stories of Tolkien alone.

Oh nooooooooo, did I offend you and your little Nazgûl toys? Did my horrifying act of (gasp) shipping two FICTIONAL characters make you sprint to the safety of the anonymous ask button, cloak fluttering dramatically behind you, so you could deliver this righteous tirade?🥺🥺🥺

Oh, how will I ever recover from being called a middle-aged Colleen Hoover mom by someone who’s clearly more pressed than the One Ring under Sauron’s hand? Truly, I’m shattered.🙄

Better a badass queen than some self-appointed Warden of the Fandom Wastes, skulking around like Gollum clutching your “precious” canon interpretations. Honestly, the only crown you’d ever wear is made of your own insecurities and bad takes, and even that sits crooked because it’s weighed down by all the irrelevant, unsolicited opinions you can’t stop flinging around. At least I’m out here enjoying myself—what’s your excuse?

You’ve got thoughts on the big red letters, do you? How utterly precious. Let me roll out the crimson carpet for you, since it seems they’ve left such a deep impression on your clearly delicate sensibilities. Here, let me give you more big red letters, because I wouldn’t want you to feel deprived of the melodramatic theater you seem so desperate for:

BIG. RED. LETTERS. JUST. FOR. YOU.!!!!

How’s that? Feeling better? Maybe this will soothe whatever irrational rage my formatting has triggered in that oh-so-fragile ego of yours. You’re acting like I personally painted the Eye of Sauron in your living room. Imagine being so pressed over font choices on the internet as well. It’s giving “I’m mad at PowerPoint for existing” energy, and frankly, it’s embarrassing.

You're embarassing yourself honey.

I wrote a reply, but I doubt you have the intelligence to understand it—or to hear it over the sound of your teeth grinding. Don’t worry, though! I hear Nazgûls get special dental benefits under Sauron’s health plan! Might want to book that appointment before the Mouth of Sauron starts mumbling your excuses for you!🦷🦷🦷

[TW: long salty rant]

First of all, if you’re so confident in your opinions, why are you skulking in my inbox as ANON, like Gollum trying to steal his precious back?

If you’re going to talk big about media literacy and "ruined characters," at least have the courage to do it without hiding behind the shadowy safety net of anonymity. You don’t sound like a defender of Tolkien’s legacy.

You sound like someone who got rejected by the Council of Elrond and has been bitter about it ever since.

Second, your entire rant reeks of irony. You complain about media literacy while writing paragraphs of projection, completely ignoring that this is fan content.

FAN. CONTENT.

You know, the space where people explore different interpretations and tell stories that resonate with them? Oh, but no! We must all bow to your singular, unyielding interpretation of Tolkien’s work, or else risk being smote upon the mountains of your judgment! Get over yourself. Seriously.

The best part? You’re mad about me "ruining" Galadriel and Elrond’s "comforting" dynamic by exploring a different take, but in the same breath, you’re tearing down Rings of Power Galadriel for being "immature" and "cringy." Sweetheart, pick a lane. You’re out here defending canon while also trashing it—what is this, the mental gymnastics World Championships? I have to say, your flexibility is impressive, careful of pulled muscles.

And so I have a sword up my what now?

Oh, my dear anonymous bard of bitterness, that’s quite the reach for someone who’s clearly got a scroll of the Silmarillion shoved so far up their ass that they probably recite Quenya conjugations in their sleep.

What’s next? Are you going to accuse me of erasing Melian because I didn’t write her into my Elrond and Galadriel fic either? Or maybe I’ll get yelled at for not including Bill the Pony in a Kingsman AU (he will be besties, don't worry)?

Let me make this very clear for you, Elvish Choir Master of Overreach, Herald of the Screeching Essay, Defender of the Lore That Nobody Asked You to Protect, Wielder of the All-Caps Argument, and Keeper of the Scroll That’s Shoved So Far Up Your Ass You Probably Quote “Ainulindalë” When Ordering Your Morning Coffee (truly, your titles grow longer than Treebeard’s introductions, yet none of them seem to include “Maker of a Valid Point.”!")-

Celebrian is not missing because I "don’t comprehend strong female characters without swords." She’s missing because, brace yourself, not every single piece of fanfiction has to feature every single character from Tolkien’s works.

Shocking, I know. Truly, I can hear the Valar themselves weeping at this revelation.

But here’s the thing: I’m not writing a Celebrian-centric fic. And you know what? That’s okay. You can unclench now.

Let’s really talk about your oh-so-bold suggestion to shove a sword somewhere for a sec. That’s your masterstroke? That’s the hill you’re dying on?

If we’re being honest, your insult is so dull it wouldn’t cut through soft butter on a sunny day, let alone make me flinch. Sting is officially handing in its resignation because it’s mortified to even share a sentence with you. You’re out here acting like you’ve got the sharpest blade in the Shire, but all I see is someone frantically flailing with a broken spoon.

And then there’s this laughable attempt at moral superiority. You’re swinging around words like you’re a defender of Middle-earth itself, valiantly protecting Tolkien’s legacy, when in reality, your argument is about as sturdy as a sandcastle at Helm’s Deep. You’re not a warrior—you’re the Mouth of Sauron after a bad day, spewing nonsense and hoping someone will think it’s profound. Newsflash: it’s not.

Let’s be clear: your little temper tantrum reeks of someone who just discovered the caps lock button, a bunch of adult words and decided to let it do all the heavy lifting.

I’ve seen hobbits throw better shade after three pints of ale.

You’re no mighty protector of canon—you’re just another basement-dwelling troll who thinks yelling loud enough will make people take you seriously.

And your sword suggestion? I’d recommend you point that creative energy inward, maybe use it to figure out how to construct an actual argument instead of regurgitating clichés you probably heard from your "leader" of choice in your private toxic fandom echo chamber. Don’t worry, though—I doubt you’ll hear any of this over the sound of your teeth grinding or the faint whistle of your Nazgûl screech echoing through your mom’s basement.

Maybe take a break, Denethor—chew on a tomato or two, cry into your cloak, and try again when you’ve leveled up from hobbit insult level: preschool.

Honestly, you’re not even mad about Celebrian being “erased.” You’re mad because I dared to write something that doesn’t align with your precious headcanons. And instead of just scrolling past, you decided to play Tolkienquisitor in my inbox, as if you’ve been personally tasked by Eru Ilúvatar to uphold canon.

I'm sorry (no) to break it to you but nobody crowned you King (or Queen) of Arda.

Not every single piece of fanfiction needs to involve every canon character just to meet your Tolkien purity test. If that’s a requirement, maybe you should write the fic. Oh wait....- you’re too busy spamming inboxes with this unhinged bullshit. My bad.

Here’s the thing, Bearer of Misplaced Rage: nobody asked for your unsolicited essay about the sanctity of Celebrian. But please, do continue climbing the Tower of Tolkien Purism like you’re on some holy quest. Maybe at the top, you’ll find the self-awareness you so desperately lack—or perhaps just a mirror to reflect your ridiculousness back at you.

You wanna talk about erasing characters? Fine.

Let’s talk about how you erased common decency, social awareness, and basic literacy by barging into my inbox with this drivel. The lorebros tirades and scroll-up-the-ass syndrome are bad enough, but now you’re out here flinging insults like “shove a sword up your ass” as if you just invented edgy. Sweetheart, that’s not edgy—that’s the kind of thing a D-list internet troll would type before running out of Wi-Fi.

So, let me leave you with this, oh Guardian of the Fanfic Gates: the next time you feel compelled to compose another Screed of the Self-Righteous, maybe take a moment to ask yourself, “Does this make me sound like a reasonable human being, or just a Balrog throwing a temper tantrum in a lava pit?” Because right now, I’d wager Smaug hoarding gold has more chill than you do.

And let’s not even start with your hilariously misplaced outrage about me shipping Elrond and Galadriel while we both apparently agree that Saurondriel is not our cup of tea. You’re yelling into the void about something I never even said or supported. Congratulations! You’ve officially argued against a strawman!

Here’s your Orcish participation trophy!

Thank you, Supreme Chancellor of Canon Policing, Overseer of the One True Interpretation, and Gatekeeper Extraordinaire of Tolkien’s Sacred Scrolls. I am truly humbled to be graced with your unsolicited advice, delivered with the self-importance of someone who thinks they’re the Mouth of Sauron but comes off more like Gollum arguing with his own reflection. Truly, I don’t know what I’d do without such pearls of wisdom.

But let me give you a word of advice, oh Lore Purist in Chief, President of the Fanfiction Police Union, and Guardian of the Shire’s Moral High Ground: I will touch Tolkien’s world, twist it, flip it like a pancake, and build something entirely new on top of it because guess what?

I’ve already done it.

And I’ll do it again.

And the best part? I don’t give a single, solitary fuck about your opinions, your outrage, or your sad little attempts to gatekeep Middle-earth like it’s your family heirloom.

You think your tired, sanctimonious “write your own book” line is a gotcha? Sweetheart, I already have. Several, in fact. And guess what? I’ll write more—more stories, more ships, more reinterpretations—and there’s nothing you can do but sit there in your self-proclaimed Chair of Canonical Superiority, furiously typing out essays that no one but you cares about. Go on, keep clutching your pearls and scribbling your fanfic hate manifestos, but let me promise you something: I’m not stopping. Ever.

It’s honestly adorable that you think your little decree will somehow shame me into putting my pen down. What next? You gonna summon the Valar to smite me for daring to reinterpret a fictional world?

Send an eagle my way, please—I’ll need it to carry all the fucks I don’t give about your opinion.

And let me be clear, Warden of Tolkien’s Spirit: your outrage is just fuel for my creative fire. Every time you whine, I just want to write more. So congrats, you’re officially my muse now, Pontiff of Perpetual Fan Rage!

You know what’s truly laughable? Your holier-than-thou act of pretending you’re the sole arbiter of what Tolkien “meant.” Tolkien’s works are complex, layered, and ripe for reinterpretation—that’s the beauty of storytelling. But no, you’ve decided you’re The Chosen One who understands it all, while the rest of us mere mortals stumble around in the dark.

Honey, if you’re the shining beacon of understanding, I’d rather take my chances in Moria without a light.

So, High Inquisitor of Gatekeeping™, continue shouting into the void, continue crying about my creative choices, and continue being mad about fanfiction. Meanwhile, I’ll be over here doing exactly what you hate: writing more, creating more, and caring less about your irrelevant opinions.

Go back to your dark little corner of Middle-earth, chewing on your bones—or was it cherry tomatoes this time?—and maybe weep dramatically about how "nobody understands your self-proclaimed brilliance". Honestly, your energy is giving less "Steward of Gondor" and more "Steward of Mom’s Basement."

Do you light a big, dramatic bonfire every time someone disagrees with you, or do you just sulk under the glow of your monitor, waiting for someone to tag your ship so you can descend like a Nazgûl in a hissy fit?

You’re out here acting like you’re defending Tolkien’s honor, but let’s be real—you’re just pressed that not everyone worships at the altar of your very specific, incredibly narrow, terminally boring interpretation of his works. It’s okay, really. We get it. You’ve been sitting there so long with that “scroll of canon” shoved up your ass that you’ve convinced yourself you’re a scholar.

Spoiler alert: you’re not. You’re just the guy crying into a bowl of instant noodles, mad that someone dared to take creative liberties with a fictional story.

To my knowledge, the Tolkien Estate is NOT sending you a paycheck to defend their lore. You’re not a martyr. You’re not a scholar. You’re not even the fun kind of fan who shares cool lore facts. You’re just the guy screaming, “That’s not canon!” into the void while the rest of us are out here enjoying our fandom like adults.

Here’s a thought: maybe instead of crying about other people’s ships, you could take that energy and, I don’t know, apply it to something useful. Learn Elvish. Build a model of Barad-dûr out of your tears. Or maybe, just maybe, stop weeping over cherry tomatoes and touch some grass. I hear the Shire has a lot of it.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have characters to write, ships to build, and a very long scroll of I don’t care to finish signing. Good day, Esteemed Minister of Misguided Rage.

Morning people! It's just above 8am but a Lorebro called (screamed)! XD

[bitterpngs]

i need an audiobook that i don’t have to place on hold i’m losing my mind right now i don’t know what to read i’m so so so unbelievably bored

[darkpoisonouslove]

You know all these books about enemies to lovers to enemies back to lovers in the end where the main character fell for the "villian" who is actually just missunderstood or the morally grey character? So Griffin and Valtor make me want to write a book where the main character is the morally grey character. And her love interest is actually the villian. They would both kill for eachother and both think they could always count on eachother. He would have his soft moments with her because he does love her but the love he has for her never stops him to be cruel to the world and she knows that. And she thought that the end justifies the means. But it doesn't and she left. And he hates her for that. He would offer her one last chance to come back to him. He was ready to forget what happened if she would finally see what he sees, what he thinks is right. But she doesn't. And every kill he does after that he did sure she knows that it's on her. And she would ask herself how she could ever fell for him while a part of her still loves him as a part of him still loves her. But obviously there woudl be no happy end bc there are roo many books out there where the "villian" becomes good in the end but that will not happen. He will not get a redemption arc.

Bc these vibes I always fot from Valtor and Grififn when I was a kid. Like we had almost none backstory but what we got was enough to want this and even more happen and we never got it! And there are like NO books out there like this and I hate that!

Yeah, redeeming the villain love interest is tired and boring and usually ruins them as a character. Especially when the author tries to justify some of their earlier villainous actions.

"BuT tHaT's ThE oNlY hEaLtHy OpTiOn!" Who cares! I'm not here for healthy relationships, which I do like but the enemies to lovers and/or lovers to enemies tropes are not the place for it. All the writing advice for enemies to lovers is just "don't make them actually hate each other and do truly terrible things to each other because you can't believably make them lovers then". No, you don't GET IT! I WANT the toxicity and the sense of "Oh, yeah, we're both out of our minds here" after everything we did to each other. One of the most appealing parts of enemies to lovers/lovers to enemies to me is love's ability to persist through all the horrible things they do to each other. The key is to just make it mutual, not have one of them (the guy; it's always the guy) be completely fucking unhinged while the other is just forced to take it.

Anyway, I personally champion the version of the story where the villain stays a villain and their love interest joins them even if they aren't necessarily a villain per se but if you want to go the full tragedy route where they're separated on opposite sides because of morals, that's super delicious too! What little we got of their story definitely sounds like that's exactly what's going on with them and we DESERVE more of that! Whether it's with the two of them or with different characters.

[fitzrove]

[shaking and biting] but what does it MEAN. what does it SAY what is the THEME

[softestepilogue]

y’all keep saying how y’all hope ed becomes redeemable and like who tf cares he did anything wrong lmao. pushing Lucius overboard? hilarious. stranding the crew? hysterical. chopping off iffy’s toes? comedic af. y’all always so worried about a character being redeemable or morally right and it’s exhausting. that’s why modern books are what they are now. boring and lame af. ed is morally gray. he’s always been morally gray. he don’t like killin but he likes maimin and he has anger issues. and he’s hilarious when he does all of it.

[spock-adoodledoo]

oh my god i just finished the dark forest finally. 7/10 i suppose, i went through the first half or so of the book being really annoyed by luo ji but also enjoying the chapters where he shows up because unfortunately he was entertaining. still don't understand the imaginary girlfriend thing, it just feels like he needs someone to protect from the world which like ??? ok sure i guess, it just rubs me the wrong way personally. for the second half and especially the end i became luo ji's number one defender it's fine. for the rest, holy crap—the droplet, the microcosm of the universe on those runaway ships, the wallfacer project, luo ji drawing from rey diaz's plan, the attitude of the world towards him, the entire theory... wow

[lenievi]

another thing I find interesting about this Jean = Champ chapter is that it implies that a lot of complaints go straight to Madeleine and he then tells Javert to deal with them or to go and inspect them

in fanfics, people usually have Javert come to the mayor to give him reports, but Madeleine literally giving Javert jobs like a cat is in the trees, go and save it feels so much funnier tbh

on a more serious note, if Madeleine tells Javert to deal with things that get sent to him, for two years, he most likely never or rarely had a complaint about Javert's job and/or disagreed with his solution. (If Madeleine interfered too much, Javert would most likely get angry sooner.) That's why he can tell Javert "you're an honest man" because Madeleine does not typically have issues with the job Javert does in his city (because otherwise Madeleine would be turning a blind eye to everyone who wasn't Fantine and that doesn't feel right) - because Javert is good at his job (now if Valjean personally agrees with it is a different question, but I believe that Valjean - after his rebirth - tries to give a chance to everyone - he used to hate everyone upon meeting, and now he treats everyone equally, Javert included).

again, this might change after I read more of the book, but these are my feelings up to this chapter.

[hey-scully-itsme]

reading some essays/lectures by Flannery O’Connor and she has some relevant stuff to say (it’s also Very Catholic so warning for that ig)

This is from Mystery and Manners.

[sweetestdumpling]

Extend your arm forward, control your breathing, pull back, contain your emotions.

It was simple instructions, ones she used to only think about in the moment, but forget the second her attention was grabbed by something else.

Even with the growing noise around her, she never stopped her movements, keeping her focus and breathing even. That is, until she felt a light tap of a finger on her thigh.

"Excuse me, Jiějiě..." It was the voice of a young girl. Almost immediately, Xiaoyu opened her eyes and got into a standing position before looking down at her with a smile.

"Yes?"

The girl looked nervous, but there was no need for her to be. Xiaoyu gave her time to gather her thoughts, which didn't take very long, before she held her hands out towards her with a shy smile.

"I made you some bracelets! It's a present...as a thank you for everything you've done, a-and helping me."

"For me? Ah, Xièxiè! You're so sweet!" Xiaoyu gently took one of the bracelets, holding it up to the sun. It was stitched together with orange yarn, and what seemed to be glitter sparkling in the sunlight.

"I know it's not...exactly the best and it...might be a little tight since I didn't know your size but I wanted to share something with you..."

The girl shyly looked down, perhaps embarrassed by her stitching, but Xiaoyu easily placed it on her wrist.

"Fits like a glove!"

The girl seemed to beam at that, Xiaoyu quickly grabbing the other one and holding it out for her to place her hand through. Once the girl realized this, she eagerly placed her hand through.

"Hehe, see? We match!"

The girl laughed, something Xiaoyu hasn't heard in a while. It felt good to see her happy again.

"If...If I make you anything else, will you wear it?"

"Of course! I want to see how much your embroidery improves. Before long, you'll be teaching me something!"

"Me? Teaching you?" The girl sounded in disbelief.

"Yep! I was never good with my hands, at least with silk and a needle. It wasn't until Yéyé stepped in did I know what to do with them."

At the mention of him, the girl's mood seemed to dampen. It wasn't her intention but Xiaoyu couldn't blame her for it either. Jinrei knew how to make a name for himself, ever since he was young. Not having his spunk around anymore left an obvious hole, one that Xiaoyu didn't realize she missed until it was already too late.

"I miss him." The young girl's voice interrupted Xiaoyu's thoughts. She gave her a smile, and a gentle pat on the head.

"I do too. But it'll be okay, next time we meet up, I'll teach you a few things about stances while you keep teaching and showing me your sewing skills. Deal?"

"Deal!"

Xiaoyu held her pinky out, the young girl using her own pinky to complete the deal. After a few more exchanges, Xiaoyu waved the girl goodbye, watching her disappear in the distance before sighing.

She sat down on the grass, listening to everything around her this time. The wind, the laughter, the talking, the birds, the whistling.

She was spunky when she was young, childish too, maybe she got it from him. Xiaoyu didn't know anything about his life when he was younger, but she knew he got his wisdom from somewhere. She only learned about his connections to the Mishima family once she was older.

Maybe she would have turned out to be more traditional if he wasn't around, maybe she would have eventually gotten better with her sewing skills like her parents initially wanted.

Xiaoyu was loud, rambunctious, maybe even a troublemaker compared to her more relaxed parents. They didn't know what to do with her, so eventually, he would suggest her to put all that energy into fighting.

It was thanks to him that they changed their minds.

"I'm still learning, Yéyé. I've gotten better but...I still have a lot to learn. I won't let you down, I promise."

Her phone soon began to vibrate, the young girl glancing down to see a message from her father. She quickly took hold of it, seeing the time, and immediately letting out a yell.

"Ah, I'm late! They're gonna kill me!"

Metaphorically of course. Xiaoyu quickly gathered up her things, haphazardly placing her jacket into the bag as she stood to her feet, running off and away from the park. Eyes watched her curiously but she paid them no mind as she answered her phone.

"Yes, Bàba? No, I didn't oversleep, it's still..." She checked her watch. "...well, not morning anymore but it's not late! It's only after 12! I'm on my way right now! I'll pick up some jianbing on the way! Tell Māmā not to start without me!"

Maybe there were still quite a few things she needed to get better with.

[sodrippy]

literate besties have any of you read The Undying Archive and was it interesting? fun? good?

[themidnightcircusshow]

@heartofstanding tagged me in this meme months ago and unfortunately it took me this long to get to it because I had a mild crisis over how long it's been since I've read a novel, let alone one that I loved 😅 so this is nine of my favourite novels (not books, because if I included manga/short stories/comics/etc this would be giant)

0The Picture of Dorian Gray -- Oscar Wilde// Pyrrhus-- Mark Merlis//The Scarecrow--Ronald Hugh Morrieson//Unnatural History--Kate Osman//Tunnels of Blood--Darren Shan//The Coffin Dancer--Jeffery Deaver//Hero--Perry Moore//Frankenstein--Mary Shelley//One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest-- Ken Kasey

[chronicowboy]

tagged by the lovely @eddiebabygirldiaz to post the 9 books i'm most excited to read this year so in no particular order

tagging @danielsousa @binickmiller @poughkeepsies @diazass @shitouttabuck @jjudaslips if u want <3

[matoitech]

bit the bullet and got a couple werewolf books from the library that do Not look good but im bored and curious and who am i if i dont at least TRY to read every werewolf book even if its shit ❤️❤️

[hopefulqueer]

I'm starting to think the reason I'm not as good of a writer as I want to be is because I like writing more than I like reading.

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

Excerpts from Ze's NY Times interview

[mikimeiko]

Books I read in 2024

Cromorama - Riccardo Falcinelli (2017)