#i just hate that my legs are so capable in other ways
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pearl-kite · 1 year ago
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So the last time I tried to ride the bike my legs were like "haha fucker, you thought this would be exactly as easy as before? Psyyyycchhh" and I barely got a few blocks away before I had to return home
Well, since dad broke his knee, he's had to do physical therapy to get back to being able to walk properly, and one of the things included was one of those little under desk pedalers, and since he's not using it anymore I've commandeered it, like, maybe I just need to do a bit of my own physical therapy for some atrophy or something
Mistake, though, is that I've been doing it right before bed because that's the only time I remember, and then I lay here VERY AWAKE, someone please come knock me out
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dearaceofhearts · 7 months ago
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you walk out after an argument
characters: husk, alastor, angel dust, vox, lucifer word count: 2.9k genre: angst to fluff summary: after an argument with them, you walk out and don't come back for a few days. how do they react? author's note: hello yes this is my first time actually posting something. erm, i think i wrote too much (sorry) but hey we roll with it!! also dude i accidentally posted this before it was ready twice and i had a heart attack oh my god. anyways i don't think vox's is really fluff (oops) but everyone else's is
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♡ husk
when you slam the door shut on your way out, husk lets out a low grumble, setting down the glass he was cleaning onto the bar counter with a quiet sigh. it was one of the first arguments you'd had in a long time. although he wasn't usually one to get riled up so easily, the two of you knew each other well enough to know just what buttons to push to get under the other's skin. that, alongside him already having a bad day, had been a recipe for disaster.
in the few days that pass by, it's hard to tell just how affected he is by your absence since he does a pretty good job of keeping a cool facade. to anyone looking, he wouldn't appear any different than usual, just idly cleaning bottles as he always does.
but it's the small things that give away just how much husk cares and worries for you, like how his eyes flicker towards the door whenever someone comes in, his ears perking up slightly. he hates the twinge of disappointment that follows when it's not you, a slight scowl curling at his lips as he takes a swig of alcohol from one of the many bottles on the shelves of the bar. he misses talking to you. you're his favourite drinking buddy, after all.
his gaze always seems to wander back to the front door of the hotel, lingering for just a little too long before he eventually turns back to the bar, expression settling back into its usual grouchiness. but underneath that lies a hint of worry that gnaws at him in the back of his mind, even though he knows you're more than capable of handling yourself. at the end of the day, you can never be too careful in hell.
husk won't force you to come back, but he just wants to know that you're safe and sound. he trusts that you'll come back when you're ready so that the two of you can talk it over and hopefully resolve things. he doesn't want to leave it like this, and he's sure you don't either. you mean a lot more to him than he'd like to admit.
when you decide to finally return to the hotel, he pauses upon catching sight of you stepping through the doorway. he can't help the small wave of relief that washes over him, though you wouldn't be able to tell by the way he smoothly resumes restocking the bar. when you approach the counter, he looks up, giving you a short nod. "hey." he greets you, tone surprisingly softer than you're used to, "you're back."
husk's not really the type to beat around the bush, so he'd likely address the argument pretty quickly. he's also not particularly one for verbal apologies, so he'd probably be more willing to show it through his actions. you see it in the way he lets you cling to him a little longer than he normally does, leaning into him as he wordlessly holds you, his tail loosely curling around your leg. if you listen closely, you can hear some faint purring, too. it makes you smile slightly.
"alright, 'nuff of this sappy stuff." husk grumbles after a few more moments, patting your back gently before pulling back. "i'd kill for a drink right now. care to join me?" he raises a brow, a familiar glint in his eyes as he slides back behind the counter, already moving to make what he knows is your favourite drink.
you grin as you meet his eyes, expression softening. "of course. i'd love nothing more."
♡ alastor
"you're not listening, al." you murmur, exhaling quietly. this makes him pause for a moment, head tilted. your voice sounds different to what he's used to — you're not even angry, no — you just sound... tired. the argument had been going on for a while, and neither of you were getting through to the other.
when you move to leave, he makes no move to stop you, simply watching you with an intent gaze. his voice rings out clear as day in the empty silence. "where do you think you're going, my dear?"
he falters ever so slightly when you turn back to face him with a sturdy, stern gaze, responding with a flatly spoken "out", leaving no room for anything more to be said before closing the door behind you with a quiet click.
alastor won't chase after you, because he expects that you'll come back to him of your own accord. to him, it's basically guaranteed how this'll play out. he's used to demons falling right into his hands without having to exert much effort on his end, and believes that this would be no different.
so when a few days pass by with you not approaching him at all, he finds himself slightly irritated and mildly perplexed, eyes narrowed as his clawed finger taps against his cane with idle impatience. why haven't you sought him out yet?
he's seen you around the hotel, but you've never once acknowledged his presence even if the two of you were in the same room, breezing past him while he's left staring, watching you converse with everyone except him. his eye twitches in irritation, the perpetual smile on his lips strained.
...eventually, after playing a long waiting game to no avail, he decides that perhaps rosie would be able to offer some helpful advice on how to approach this situation, since he's not used to actually handling delicate emotional matters without the— well, the manipulation and deal-making.
one of the main issues is his massive ego. it's that unfaltering pride that gets in the way of him apologising. he may be the radio demon, but all that power can't help him here. and he'd never openly admit to such, but he truly is at somewhat of a loss here. he's already tried most things that he's sure would usually make you forgive him, though for a reason unbeknownst to him, it's not working this time.
"oh alastor," rosie shakes her head with a small huff, "a lady's heart is to be treated with care." she lends some further words of wisdom and encouragement that he listens to with great attentiveness, since he does (begrudgingly) enjoy your company, and it would be a shame if it was lost over such a, in his eyes, trivial matter.
upon his return to the hotel, he manages to get you to sit down with him (after much polite pestering and insistence) to have a chat over some tea. when all is said and done, the two of you sit in a comfortable silence. you sip your tea, watching the blazing fires of hell from the balcony.
"refill?" alastor offers, glancing at you briefly through a sip of his own tea.
"much appreciated." you hum, legs crossed as you throw him a small, slack smile.
♡ angel dust
his frustration slowly fizzles out as the door closes behind you, and the guilt slowly starts to creep in. he knows he shouldn't have said what he did, and he wants nothing more than to apologise and make it up to you — but he understands that it's probably better to give you some time to cool off before trying to approach you again.
despite the argument and the harsh words exchanged between you, the fact that he cares for you with his whole heart will never change, and he hopes you know that too.
while you're away, angel always finds his thoughts drifting to you, wondering how you're doing. are you eating okay? are you drinking enough? sleeping enough? with a shake of his head and a small sigh, he tries his best to return his focus back to the task at hand, whatever it may be.
he knows you can take care of yourself perfectly fine, but he just... misses you. the guilt eats away at him when he's reminded of the look on your face when you left, the brief glimmer of hurt in your eyes before you masked it with anger and tore your gaze away.
one particular night, angel heads over to your room in the hotel out of habit, not really thinking about it when he raises a fist to knock on the door. he had been hoping to spend some time with you, since today had been a particularly rough day for him. he's also been craving for one of your sleepover nights for a while, those nights where you two would stay up to talk about anything and everything until dawn rises. those times were comforting for him — a rare moment of respite in his life.
but then he stops abruptly, remembering that you're not there. he lets his hand fall back to his side, expression quietly downcast. he stands alone in the silent, empty hallway. has it always been this cold?
after a few days, he's just about damn ready to go looking for you, making his way down the stairs as he prepares to head out. he's so focused that he almost misses the sight of you seemingly casually sitting at the bar, nursing a drink in your hands whilst exchanging low murmurs with husk.
he freezes momentarily, taking a deep breath. while he mentally debates with himself whether to approach you or not, husk notices him hesitating on the staircase. he catches angel's gaze, giving him a subtle nod. that's all the affirmation angel needs.
he slides on his usual relaxed demeanour, though it's a little weaker than normal, as he approaches you. he's admittedly a little nervous, but he's determined to work things out with you. he puts a gentle hand on your shoulder to catch your attention. "hey, darlin'. can i talk to you for a minute?"
the two of you head back to your room, where heartfelt apologies are exchanged and a long overdue conversation takes place. at some point during the talk, his hand had found its way on top of yours, thumb brushing over your skin gently. at the end of it all, he gives you a small, content smile. "...baby, you have no idea just how much i adore you." he whispers into the quiet, running his fingers through your hair comfortingly as your head rests on his shoulder.
it was an unspoken agreement that tonight was going to be a sleepover night. prepare for lots of cuddling and gentle, soft kisses.
♡ vox
he's the type to go "ha, see if i care!" when you leave, but he'll still check on you occasionally through the various cameras and electronics around the city — he swears it's just because he's making sure the new limited edition voxtek product he had given to you isn't damaged.
(...it's totally because he's looking out for you, by the way. even if it's only a little. you are his darling, after all. and uh, you'll never know what happened to that guy who tried to hit on you that one time).
(vox made sure not even a trace of that bastard remained).
his obnoxious pride makes him reluctant to reach out first. that, and he's a petty little shit. so everyone around him, whether that be the other vees or his employees, is stuck dealing with his foul mood. he's become even more irritable and susceptible to lashing out than usual since you left.
he'd rather die than admit it, but you were a calming presence in his life that he hadn't realised he needed until you were gone. he hates just how much power you have over him, though you may or may not realise it. he's supposed to be the one in charge. when did you manage to sneak into his heart? his mind is occupied with thoughts of you.
and it only frustrates him more, because you're not here.
all his employees are left on edge, even more so when he takes his anger out on some poor soul who had gotten the numbers wrong on the report they handed in. "clean this mess up." vox snaps, glowering as he fixes the cuffs of his sleeves. the demon at the door hurriedly moves to do as he says, not wanting to risk meeting the same fate.
"what? what are you looking at?" he turns, eyes narrowing at the rest of the employees who flinch, hastily turning their eyes back to the screens in front of them. "get back to work." he mutters sharply, an unspoken threat in his words.
his volatile temperament goes on for a while, until velvette decides she's finally had enough and sends you a (not so) polite text to resolve your little lover's spat before she takes matters into her own hands.
meanwhile, vox is in his office. nothing seems to be going his way, and he's just about to blow another fuse when you nonchalantly throw open the doors, inviting yourself in. he freezes, staring at you for a few moments. you raise a brow. "...so. i heard you were throwing another hissy fit."
vox scowls at that, grumbling under his breath. "oh yeah? and what'd you come back for, you prissy little princess?" he sneers, clawed fingers digging into the desk with a quiet screech. "couldn't go without me for long, huh?"
"ha. you wish that was the case." you scoff, rolling your eyes with a half-amused, irked smile curling at your lips. things escalate into another argument pretty quickly, with the two of you at each other's throats. he towers over you, eyes narrowing as his grin widens in mild irritation.
it's a back and forth for quite some time, until you get sick of it and grab him by the collar of his shirt, yanking him closer until you're glaring at one another face to face. "what the fuck do you think you're—" he starts, but he's quickly cut off when your lips crash into his. vox is stunned for a few moments but soon snaps out of it, swiftly returning your kiss with equal, if not more, ferocity and intensity.
"finally got you to shut up." you murmur, grinning as you part to catch your breath and release his shirt from your grasp. before you can pull back completely, however, his hand reaches up to rest against the back of your neck, the other firmly on your waist. it takes another long, drawn-out kiss for him to finally let you go — though not really, since he's still holding you close in his arms.
"...that was hot." he whispers breathlessly, staring down at you with a somewhat satisfied glint in his eyes. but you both know that there's more to come.
suffice to say, the two of you sorted things out.
♡ lucifer
he would regret everything almost instantly. lucifer realises just how badly he fucked up when you leave without looking back. he's not even quite sure what happened as he stands alone in the room, blinking as he's left to process everything on his own. his mind is a jumbled mess, and he can't think clearly.
all he can feel is a suffocating rush of fear as he snaps out of his daze and hurries after you, desperate to find you before you're gone. he doesn't want to take his chances. what if you don't come back? what if—
he had said things that he didn't mean, and now the weight of it all feels crushing on his shoulders. he's torn between wanting to reach out to apologise and giving you time to cool down. he doesn't want to be a bother, but also really wants to make things up to you.
most of all, he just wants reassurance that you'll come back to him and that he hasn't messed things up for good. he doesn't want to lose you. you're too precious to him for that, and he's mentally kicking himself for ever making you question your importance to him for even a second.
thankfully, you haven't gone too far so he's able to catch up to you, taking a hold of your wrist firmly. however, when you turn to look at him, he falters, the words dying in his throat. he swallows, softly clearing his throat as he scrambles to say something, anything to stop you from leaving. to reaffirm his love for you.
"...sweetheart, i'm so sorry," he whispers, expression twisted and heart heavy with remorse and sorrow as he brings you close, grip subconsciously tightening because he's afraid to let you go. "i'll do anything, i'll make it up to you, i—" he trails off, burying his face into your shoulder, "just, please... don't leave. i'm sorry."
you really can't stay mad at him for too long after seeing his genuine sincerity. he acknowledges his wrongs, wanting nothing more than to make up for his mistakes and make you feel as appreciated and cared for as you've made him feel over the course of you two knowing each other. you sigh gently, thumb lightly brushing over his cheek. "...alright, silly. let's go home."
his eyes light up at that, and he's reminded of just how grateful he is to have you here by his side as you guys make your way home together. he holds your hand the entire time.
after the two of you make up, you find that he'll leave little gifts and cute trinkets around for you despite your gentle assurances that he doesn't have to. he also gives you lots of forehead kisses. he just wants to make sure you never forget how much he loves you, and that you mean the world to him.
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© dearaceofhearts ー all rights reserved. please do not steal, use or modify my works!
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yappingwitch · 1 month ago
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Say It Ain't So
pairing - Virgin!James Potter x fem!reader
summary - James busts a fat one. Porn with glimpses of plot. Maybe.
warnings - 18+ mdni, smut, awkwardness, James is a desperate virgin in this one, hence the weezer title, premature ejaculation, handjob (m receiving), one sided enemies to ???, slight m sub/f dom dynamics if you squint, legs
wordcount - 1.6k
disclaimer - english is my second language. Don't hesitate to correct me!
You hated James Potter.
Your dislike well-known among your friends, none of them dared to ever mention him anymore, fearing another long-winded rant from you. Remembering when the lot of you would stay up after curfew, sharing gossip and talking about your crushes. All of them gasped when you casually shared your feelings about the headboy after they spent what felt like hours gushing about him. Proceeding to list of every single thing wrong with the guy, making your friends regret ever bringing him up.
Did he have beautiful curly hair you just wanted to run your fingers through? Brilliant hazel eyes in which mischief was ever-present? Pretty plump lips, his slightly crooked, overly confident smirk always on them? Well, yes, you could admit that much. But as soon as he opened his mouth, you couldn’t care less about how pretty it was. He'd always disrupt the lessons, the golden boy having no filter or capability to raise his hand, always yelling the answers out or talking loudly with his posse during dinner, unable to control his volume and barely having to face any consquences for his obnoxious nature.
So when Slughorn, who aside from his quirky nature, you quite liked, decided to pair you both together for the last project of the year, you were fuming. At least internally. Your prideful nature and pureblood customs instilled in you by your parents forced you to keep a blank face, only briefly smiling at the teacher when he uttered your name after James', swallowing your rage.
Shortly after class ended, as you were packing your things after quickly finishing your notes, you suddenly heard one of the old wooden chairs in front of you creak. Looking up at the noise, you saw a certain Gryffindor already staring back, a stupid smirk on his face like always, the air of confidence around him ever-present.
“So…,” James started absent-mindedly going through your notes, but you quickly interrupted whatever he was about to say.
“I’ll take care of the project by myself. Can’t have you messing up my grades,” you simply stated, ripping your notes from his hands, frowning at the way he had smudged the last of your sentence. Ignoring your frown, he loudly exclaimed, “Hey! My grades are stellar.” He tapped his finger against his chest, where his perfect badge was. “They don’t give them away for nothing, you know?”
“I also don’t like you,” you said after a moment of silence, standing up and slinging your bag over your shoulder, quickly walking out.
But he wouldn't let up, following you all the way to the Great Hall, pestering you until you finally snapped right by the Slytherin table.
“Saturday, library, after lunch. No word from you until then,” you almost yelled, your face twisting in anger. Noticing the other Slytherins' snickers, you quickly composed yourself, swallowing your anger. He, oblivious as always, smiled widely, ignoring your state and simply basking in the glory of having won this little duel of words.
Saturday approached faster than you would’ve liked, dreading the obnoxious boy's presence already. But you approached the surprisingly empty library anyway, not one to go back on your word. You frowned slightly, looking around, realizing even the librarian must have taken the day off. Sighing, you called out to James; he was already there, notes and textbooks scattered about. He quickly jumped up from his chair, beaming like always, until his gaze drifted down, his usual aura of self-assurance dwindling a little.
“What are you wearing?” he asked, mouth hanging slightly agape.
You looked down; you were wearing a simple skirt and long-sleeved top, not too different from what you usually wore in your free time. Confused, you lifted your head again, his gaze quickly following, being previously trained on your bare legs. Realizing he had been caught, a blush appeared on his cheeks as he plopped unceremoniously down, coughing awkwardly and focusing on the books laying before him.
“Weirdo,” you stated, disinterest evident, just wanting this project to be over with. But what you saw once you reached the table he was sitting at piqued your interest suddenly. Looking down, a prominent bulge had formed in the front of his pants, straining against the material. A book was quickly tossed over it, but it was too late.
“You’re such a skeeze. Who gets hard from looking at a girl's legs?” you asked, amused, not really expecting an answer, just continuing to stare him down, enjoying watching the high-and-mighty golden boy begin to tremble under your intense gaze.
“..they are your legs,” he mumbled, blush only deepening as his eyes stayed glued to the table.
This made you laugh out loud, gasping for air.
“Are you a virgin or something? Bloody hell,” you huffed out between laughs, a single tear escaping your eye at the comical twist your day had taken.
James didn't reply, groaning in embarrassment and continuing to hold the book tightly over his lap.
“Cat got your tongue?” you said, still smirking but finally having calmed down. “I didn’t even know you were capable of zipping it.”
This seemed to push him over the edge; he picked up his bag and shoved everything in with lightning speed, until suddenly he froze, hearing your next sentence.
“I can help you out if you want,” you said, a mischievous smile adorning your pretty face, putting his own to shame.
All he got out was a quick “huh,” as you pounced, wordlessly pushing him back down onto the chair. He looked up through his glasses, his eyes wide, the cute blush still evident on his face. Fuck.
“You are so pretty,” you whispered aloud before pressing your mouth against his. Short and sweet. It was almost romantic, the way he gently started to move his mouth and the lovestruck look on his face once you pulled away.
He eagerly leaned forward again, knocking his nose against yours before trying again, this time slower, aiming properly while the book he had previously clenched in his lap dropped to the floor with a thud. He opted to instead take hold of your hips, almost moaning at the feeling of the warmth of your skin touching his, slightly poking out from the bottom of your shirt. You, in turn, moved your hand that gripped the curls at the back of his neck slowly down his chest, delicate fingers grasping at the painful bulge in his pants. This made James quickly pull away, a loud moan leaving his now reddened lips as he grasped your wrist, stopping your movement.
“I-” he gasped out. “I-I’m waiting for the right person.”
He regretted talking the second the words left his mouth, seeing you roll your eyes at him, laughing a little at the bizarre turn of events, moving to remove your hand nonetheless.
He quickly went to grasp at your wrist again, pulling it toward his crotch once more, his body moving on its own.
“You need to make up your mind, pretty boy,” you said softly, looking at him amused.
“You know…,” you started after he continued to be silent, he in turn looked up at you through his lashes, blushing, his glasses a little crooked and a dorky smile on his lips, hearing your voice again. “Maybe I’m not the right person… but… I could be your right hand,” you finished, slightly averting your eyes, cringing at your words.
He didn't notice, though, too lost in need for release; he eagerly nodded his head. You laughed a little, removing his grip on your arm and moving to open the Gryffindor's trousers, just enough for you to pull his now hard member out, precum already coating his tip, while pressing another sweet kiss to his lips. Disconnecting from him once more, you lifted your right hand, holding it up to James' face expectantly.
“Spit,” you commanded, and the boy obliged without a second thought.
One long, loud moan left his mouth as your hand slowly moved against his cock, brushing your thumb over the head, gently mixing the precum with his spit, spreading it all over his length. You moved to press kisses to his bobbing throat, his head thrown back in pleasure, as you started to move your hand up and down in a steady rhythm, sucking a small purple spot onto his neck, his gasps and groans only getting louder.
“Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck,” James repeated over and over like a prayer, lost in pleasure. You lifted your head, stopping your assault on his neck, to look at his scrunched-up face, eyes tightly shut, mouth hanging open. You couldn't help but stare, the glaring noon sun shining in through the stained glass and making his skin almost appear to glow, colors of the rainbow dancing around his face, sweat bullets forming on his forehead like little diamonds. Fuck. He really was—
“Pretty,” you mumbled, pushing James over the edge-a string of curses leaving him as he came undone over your hand, specks of it staining your skirt all the way to your pretty legs, the reason all of this started in the first place.
He continued to gasp, trying to catch his breath and gasping out apologies for the mess. You silently tugged him back into his pants, amused at the wet spot adorning his own lower half.
You wiped your hand on his pants before zipping him up. Wordlessly, you pressed a kiss to his cheek, swiftly turning around, ready to go take a shower after the ordeal.
“Wait,” you paused in your steps, glancing back at James. “D-do… you… want… to,” he started, before pausing again, finally catching his breath. “Do you want to go to Hogsmeade… with me?”
You glanced ahead, continuing on your path without replying to the desperate boy, only flashing him a quick smirk.
Maybe you didn't hate him after all.
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boothillssugarmomma · 6 months ago
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Steel Here
(Boothill x Fem!Reader)
cw-: Body dysmorphia, slight talks of hating themself, other than that fluff fluff
🎀 authorsnote: Rn I'm feeling like my body isn't great so I used this fic to sort of get it out! And it actually felt great!
please don't steal my work!
Taglist🎀HSR Master List🎀Other Lists🎀
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Boothill’s quietly sitting in his room that you begged him to have on The Astral Express. As his girlfriend you've been trying to get him to stay around more and he adores it.
But it also gives him more time to really think...and he doesn't know if he likes that part.
Ok...he hates it. He hates that fact that he has to see himself when he passes a mirror, he hates it when he feels his cool steel against his face, he hates how he can't feel your hugs...
Boothill stands and looks in the mirror, flexing his mechanical arms softly and glancing over his fake abs. He shakes his left metal leg and sighs.
He hears the small mechanical noise of his bedroom door and looks over to it. He smiles softly as he sees you.
“Hey sweet thang...” He shoots you a warm smirk, trying to cover up what he was doing as he quickly sits on his bed. You glance over at the mirror and back to him. Piecing it in your mind what exactly he was doing. “What do ya need hon...?”
You're silent as he asks. No response as you just blink. Your eyes communicate to him that you want him to tell you what you saw.
Your boyfriend sighs a little. Placing his head in his hands and closing his eyes.
“Don't gimme that look...” He breathes, obviously frustrated as he looks back up at you, “Fine...I'm startin' to wish I was me again...I don't want this body anymor'.”
"Oh honey..." You whisper softly as you sit next to him on the bed. You place a hand on his back but remember he won't even be able to feel it...
“See...now would ya look at that...?” Boothills voice drawls, he places a hand on your thigh and sighs as you shiver at the cold metal. “I...guess this is ma' life now..." He scoffs softly. "Can't even curse...it's all 'muddle fudger' this and 'fork that' and 'son of a nice lady'..."
"Boothill sweetheart..." You whisper as you lean against him. "Don't say that..."
Boothill hesitates on resting his temple against your head, he doesn’t need his body reminding him that part of his ridiculous body is only metal.
But he doesn’t know what else to do to comfort himself. He’s frustrated to the moon and back, frustrated at being in this body he doesn’t want.
“I don’t think you understand, darlin’” Boothill whispers. “I miss the me I once was. I just… don’t feel quite like myself anymore…”
"You're still...my Boothill..." You pull away gently and grasp his cheek.
The corner of his lips quirk upwards at your words, but the warm touch and caress of your hand on his cheek still doesn’t feel the same. He wishes of his could feel the same kind of texture he once thrived from and took for granted in his human skin...not just his face.
It’s almost...cold to him.
“You’re the only one who can remind me of the old me that’s still lyin’ somewhere underneath this piece’o’junk body.” He murmurs.
"It's not a piece'o'junk..." You imitate him with a smile. "Boothill... you're amazing just the way you are..."
There you go smiling. If there’s anything that’s capable of changing his mood for the better, it’s you.
Boothill gives you a chuckle. “Look who’s sweet talkin’ who now,” his voice is a bit more lighthearted than previously. “You’ve gotta stop bein’ like this darlin’. You’re gonna make me blush.”
You smile softly and kiss his cheek. "Honey...look at me..." You take his face in your hands. "I love you..."
Boothill smiles, feeling your lips press against his cheek. His hands find their way to your wrists, gently caressing them and wishing he could feel your skin. He knows it's definitely a lot warmer than the cold of his steel.
“You’re a real charmer, y’know that?” He says, his voice low and amused. “I don’t reckon I can look anywhere else when ya say things like that.”
"Now...how can we make you feel better?" You hum softly in his ear.
“You have no idea how bad I want that...” Boothill replies with a grin. He pulls your face closer to his and whispers into your ear. “But you’ve got to keep those sweet words of yours comin’.” Boothill’s voice is low and seductive. “I’m starvin’ here, darlin’.”
"Pamper Queen tonight aren't we?" You laugh, placing your hand on his chest.
“Only for my darlin’.” He teases, placing a hand over yours and gently rubbing his thumb against your skin. Boothill’s other hand caresses your cheek. “Let’s be frank; you’ve gotten me spoiled rotten, and I ain’t mad about it.”
Your face contorts into a look of pure thought. "Here...since you give me massages sometimes..." You get up and walk over to his closet.
Boothill’s curious as his gaze follow your movements, hands resting on the arm rest. He wonders if you’re looking for something specific.
“Whatcha lookin’ for, darlin’?” He asks, tilting his head to rest his cheek on his metal palm, fingers pressed against his chin.
"How about we polish your metal?" You pull out some wax and a waxing machine.
Boothill’s expression changes into something resembling a mix of disbelief and shock, then into amusement as he bursts into laughter. He had an expectation for what you were going to do, but this wasn’t it.
“Is that a euphemism for something I’m not gettin’?" He jokes, his laughter trailing into a playful smirk as he watches you closely.
"Well...I don't know the equivalent of a massage for cyborgs!" You whine playfully.
Boothill chuckles as he playfully rolls his eyes at you. “Oh, I’m certain a few people out there would call this ‘metal maintenance’ or something.”
He then rises to his feet. “And I wouldn’t mind havin’ ya give me a good ol’ metal maintenance, darlin’. But I hope you know I’m ticklish in some spots.”
"How are you ticklish..." You murmur and plug it into the wall.
Boothill chuckles again, crossing his arms as he gazes down at the metal machine in your hands. “I’m ticklish ‘round my neck and behind my knee, believe it or not. I ain’t kiddin’.”
He walks over to you and stands before you, a grin spreading on his face. “I’ve got a feelin’ you’re gonna use this as a weapon against me, aren’t ya?”
"Phantom tickles on the knee I guess..." You hum and fire it up. "And it's NOT a weapon..."
“Aww, shoot… and here I was, thinkin’ you’d give me a break.” He quips, shrugging his shoulder and letting out a small chuckle.
In truth, Boothill is a little excited for you to polish him. “How are you at polishin’ machines, darlin’? Cause it ain’t gonna be clean if you don’t know what you’re doin’...” He teases as he glances at the polishing machine, then back at you.
You hesitate and cough. "I'm...great?" You quickly get to work before he can question anything.
Boothill raises a brow as he eyes you with a small, amused smirk. He has a feeling you're definitely not good with these machines.
“I’m sure ya are.” He teases, a small, playful chuckle falling from his lips.
While Boothill initially stands still, he can’t help but feel a little ticklish as he can feel the machine polish the outer surface of his thigh. “Careful with that…”
You giggle softly as you keep polishing his metal body. You slide up to his neck and carefully polish it.
A soft, amused chuckle leaves Boothill as he can’t help it. Your gentle polish on his neck is a little ticklish, which causes him to tense up from the sensation. He’d definitely describe it as ticklishness. He rests a hand on the back of your head as you polish his neck, caressing the underside of his fingers against your skin.
“Oh, what a sight to see. I’ve got my pretty lady polishin’ me to perfection.” He teases.
"D-Don't distract me or I'll move!" You whine.
“Distract you?” Boothill murmurs, his lips tilting into a small smirk. “I’m just complimentin' you.”
He gently moves your chin with a finger, guiding it to meet his gaze as he gazes down at you. “And don’t move. I like the way your beautiful eyes look when you’re focused on me.” A tease disguised as a compliment.
You freeze as your heart pounds in your chest...which was not the best move because the polisher slides right off him and shoots at the wall.
A small gasp leaves Boothill when he watches the polisher slide off him. But then he bursts into a hearty chuckle, his hands resting on his waist. His eyes are closed while he laughs, and when he’s done, he glances at the wall where the polisher’s been launched into.
“That wall didn’t do nothin’ to deserve that, darlin’...“ He teases through stifled giggles.
"Y-Yeah well...you distracted me!" You whine before sitting in his lap.
Boothill pulls you onto his lap and rests his chin on your shoulder, his arms naturally wrapping around your waist. As you lean against him, he can see the machine embedded into the wall from the corner of his eye. He shakes his head and laughs again.
“You’re a feisty one, aren’t ya?” He teases, nuzzling his face to the crook of your neck and trailing his lips against your skin.
"It's not like I did it on purpose..." You mutter into his hair.
Boothill lets out another chuckle, feeling the warmth of your breath against his head. “I know you didn’t.” He murmurs, letting out a low sigh that’s a mix of contentment and relief.
He gently presses his cheek to the top of your head, his fingers gently rubbing your waist. “I’m just teasin’ ya, darlin’. You wouldn’t hurt a fly. ‘Sides, look at the bright side.” He adds. “At least the machine didn’t land on my toes.”
"You don't even have toes!" You blink and roll your eyes.
Boothill’s expression turns into a grin as he laughs, pulling you closer to him. “See? Told ya you’re the feisty one.” He teases, tilting his head to kiss your temple. He places another kiss on the top of your head, savoring the feeling of your warmth against his.
“Maybe I don’t have toes.” He begins, placing another kiss on your cheek. “But this body’s got everything else ya need.”
"See that's my Boothill..." You smile warmly. "Don't think of yourself the way you were before...and if you do...let me know?" You whisper.
As he hears your words, a soft smile forms on Boothill's face. He places a hand on your cheek, gently stroking the side of your face as his other rests on your waist.
His eyes look deep into yours with affection, and a corner of his lips quirks upwards. “That's a mighty good offer ya’re givin’ me here, darlin’. But I’d rather you stop me from thinkin’ like that before I could.”
"Now that is a better plan..." You smile before leaning in to kiss him.
Boothill’s eyes flutter to a close as your lips press against his, a warm fluttering feeling erupting in his chest. The kiss is slow and tender, and he melts against your touch as he pulls you a little closer and into his embrace.
Once the kiss ends, Boothill opens his eyes and sighs, feeling calmer and a lot more pleasant than before.
“You’re way too good for this broken ol’ geezer.” He whispers affectionately.
"Boothill...honey... you're not even old!" You laugh softly and nuzzle against him.
Boothill lets out a low chuckle, his hand gently caressing your skin as he leans into your touch. "You sure about that, darlin'? I feel like a relic with all this metal on me."
He glances down at his metallic hand, flexing his fingers. Then, he looks back at you with a smile. “But as long as you’re tellin’ me otherwise, I guess I ain’t.”
"That's what I thought~" You press a kiss to his forehead.
A smirk spreads on Boothill’s face as he watches you kiss his forehead. He lifts a hand and gently caresses your face, his thumb rubbing your skin.
“Ain’t you a precious one?” He muses, his grin widening as he gazes at you. “I reckon I ain’t that old after all.” He adds, his teasing tone laced with an affectionate edge. “What gives you the right to be so adorable?”
"I'm your girlfriend, it's my job!" You smile warmly.
Once again, Boothill’s gaze falls into yours, and he feels a flutter in his chest at your words. He rests a hand on your waist, caressing your skin with the back of his cold metal fingers.
“You’re right,” he murmurs, a warm smile spreading on his face as he nods. His eyes lock with yours, and he lifts a hand to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear.
“And I reckon you’re doin’ a real good job at it, darlin’...” He adds, his voice low, warm and affectionate.
"Y'know... I'm always going to be here..." You smile. "Hey, hey!" You start to giggle. "I'm 'steel' here..." You joke.
Boothill lets out a loud laugh, shaking his head as you throw in a joke. He takes your hand and intertwines his fingers with yours, lifting it to his lips and planting a kiss on your knuckles.
“You’re real clever,” he murmurs, his eyes crinkling at the corners as his smile grows wider. In all honesty, he appreciates the effort you’re putting into cheering him up.
“Ain’t a doubt in me that you’d always be here for me, darlin’.”
You kiss him one more time. This time more passionate and love infused. As you pull away you smile. "I'll always...be here..."
The unexpected passion in your kiss catches Boothill off guard and leaves him breathless. As you pull away, he lets out a low gasp, his grip on your hand tightening just a little.
When you declare your promise, he presses his forehead against yours, his eyes closed as he lets the moment sink in. He feels a wave of warmth wash over him, and he whispers back.
“I’ll be here for you, too, darlin’...”
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🎀End🎀
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roosterforme · 8 months ago
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Too Much to Lose | Rooster x Reader
Summary: Leaving for deployments had always been rough, but then Bradley met you, and the time apart and risk involved made the ache even stronger. But nothing felt quite as isolating and scary as acknowledging that he had to leave his pregnant wife with an uncertain future. Now more than ever, he had too much to lose.
Warnings: Angst, panic attack, mentions of smut, pregnancy topics
Length: 2300 words
Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader
This was written to accompany my series Is It Working For You? along with a bunch of my one-shots and other series, but it can be read on its own! Check my masterlist for the reading order.
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Bradley hated that he felt like he was going through the motions. You'd been clinging to him all day long, your eyes always on the verge of tears. His bags were packed, his flight would leave tomorrow morning, and there was nothing left for him to do at this point except wait. Wait for your tears to spill over. Wait for one last look at you for who knows how long. Wait for the official start of another deployment.
Getting hard for you was not the problem. Your lips were on his body, and his name was the only word you seemed capable of saying. Nothing ever felt as good as your touch, and you always smelled sweet. Best of all, you were carrying his baby. But the doubt still crept in, even as his body rocked against yours, even as he filled you up. Because for Bradley, this felt exactly like those months when you and he had been desperately trying to get pregnant. It felt like the two of you were focusing on an uncertain outcome instead of each other. 
"I love you, Roo." 
You had just uttered the most perfect words in your state of bliss, but he couldn't fully accept them. Why did you love him? How the fuck could you? Your hands came up to caress his face, and he was completely helpless to do a god damn fucking thing besides come for you.
"Oh god," he grunted, practically crying as you kissed his scars before gradually going limp beneath him. You were smiling as you rolled onto your side, but instead of joining you for one last cuddle, he made his excuses to retreat to the bathroom. 
Bradley splashed some cool water on his face and examined himself in the mirror. All he saw was someone who didn't know what he was doing. Someone who wasn't good enough for you. He hadn't felt this way a few days ago, rather he'd been absorbed with shopping for the baby. But the fear started to creep in around the edges today, and now it felt like it could strangle him if he let it.
Leaving home in this state could only spell disaster, but he couldn't shake it. At least when he finally managed to walk back into the bedroom, you were asleep on his pillow with one leg under the blanket and one on top. You could always make him smile, but this time when he did, he thought about what would happen next if he didn't come back. What would happen if he was no longer here to claim that pillow as his own. 
He checked his will a few days ago, and the thing was ironclad. It all went to you. Every last penny and possession. But that wasn't what had him rattled. Everything was ten times more exciting and also ten times scarier with the baby on the way. He had too much to lose. 
He kissed your forehead and then your belly, and he pulled the blanket over both of your legs, and then he went out to the living room with Tramp at his heels. The house still smelled delicious; you'd made him Marry Me Rooster and lemon cupcakes for dinner. You always pulled out the stops when he was leaving, and he loved you for it. But what the fuck were you getting in return?
He grabbed his phone from where he'd left it on the kitchen counter. You and he had been sharing a plate of dinner while he started to consider what your life would be like without him. You'd have the baby here with you, but you'd really be alone. It was too hard to breathe while he thought about it, so he unlocked his phone and dialed the only person who wouldn't think he'd gone completely off the deep end with his request.
"Bradshaw. Shouldn't you be enjoying your wife before you fly off into the sunset?"
"Hangman," he rasped, walking to the couch and collapsing down onto it. "I need to talk to you."
There was a brief pause before Jake said, "I'm all ears."
Bradley cleared his throat, feeling like an absolute idiot as he said, "I bought a jungle gym playset for my backyard. A really big one. For the baby."
Jake hummed and said, "Right." And somehow that was enough to make Bradley keep going. 
"It's on pallets. On my driveway. There's an instruction book on top of my refrigerator. Everything should be here."
"Okay," Jake said quietly. 
Bradley swallowed and swallowed, his throat burning as he managed to force out the rest of the words. "If anything happens to me, I need you to... build it."
The only thing he could hear was Jake's soft breathing before he muttered, "Shit." 
Bradley ran his palm back and forth over his face as tears streaked down his cheeks. "Hangman. I need you to promise. I need that fucking thing in the yard."
"Yeah," Jake grunted. "Yeah, I promise."
Bradley sucked in a deep breath before he added, "And I need you to promise to take care of her. Take care of them. Make sure she knows you're around if they need something. Make sure she knows she can go to you and Cat for help."
There was no way to tell if the barely controlled sobs were his own or Jake's as he held the phone tighter to his ear, waiting for an answer. "Yeah, Rooster. I'll take care of Angel. I promise."
Bradley managed to choke out two words before ending the call. "Thank you." His phone fell from his hand onto the floor, and he curled up on his side. He thought about his dad. Goose died during a training exercise. If the most basic parts of Bradley's job could become deadly, he was honestly tempting fate at this point. Was this still the right thing to do? With a baby on the way? He wasn't so sure anymore.
Both of his parents were gone before he was an adult. If he made it just a few more years, he would live to be older than either of them had. This wasn't the first time he'd thought about that number, but right now, he was having a hard time catching his breath. 
Forty. Carole died when she was forty years old.
Thirty-seven. Bradley was just three years away.
"Fuck," he gasped as he rolled onto his back, pressing the heels of his hands to his eyes. He was nauseous and dizzy, and his chest was aching like there was something pressing down on him. Something heavy. He shouldn't leave you alone now, because he might never come back. He might never get to meet the Nugget who he was already so in love with. The baby might never have a dad at all, but at least Bradley got to have one of those for a short time. He could remember little bits of how it felt when Nick Bradshaw picked him up, and the soft laughter in his voice when he read a bedtime story. But the Nugget deserved more than that. This baby deserved everything, including a dad who was already so devoted that it hurt. A perfect mom and a loving dad, just like Bradley had once upon a time.
He could feel Tramp licking his elbow and whimpering, but he couldn't open his eyes. He couldn't move at all. He needed to catch his breath. He started counting in his head but couldn't keep track of how far he'd gotten. He wanted to meet his kid. He needed to.
"Bradley?"
Your voice was the most perfect sound in the world, and when you spoke his name, he had a visceral reaction to it. Then your hand was on his cheek, and the heavy feeling lifted away a little bit. 
"Oh, Bradley."
You replaced your hand with your lips, and he could feel how warm you were as your body came to rest on his. Your voice and touch invaded him in place of that terrifying weight on his chest. He felt safer because it was you. And the baby, too. When he opened his eyes, you looked concerned, and he hated to be the cause of that.
His voice didn't sound like his own, but you looked relieved as he said, "Sweetheart."
All he could focus on was the steady stroking of your fingers through his hair and your lips on his. "Tell me what's wrong, Roo," you whispered between soft kisses. "Talk to me."
He wasn't sure how long it took or how you managed to do it, but he ended up sitting on the couch with you curled up in his lap, ready to talk. Your cheek was resting against his heart, and his hand was under his old gym shirt that you were wearing, pressed to your belly. He wanted to tell you everything he was thinking. He wanted you to understand. But all he could say was, "I'm scared."
You nodded and hummed softly. "Me too."
When he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you in tighter, he asked, "Then why do I keep doing this? The last thing I'd ever want to do is scare you."
Your fingers found their way back up into his hair. "It's scarier this time, because of the baby," you whispered. "But you're an amazing pilot, and you love flying, and that's important, too."
"Not as important as you," he swore immediately. "Never as important as the Nugget. I just don't know if the risk is worth it anymore." He swallowed hard but let the tears slide down his cheeks again. "What if I burn in or get shot down before the baby is even born? Then what? Because I had no fucking clue until pretty recently how badly I want to be a dad."
"Come here," you whispered, your arms winding around his neck as you straddled his hips. You didn't seem alarmed by this conversation as you ran the tip of your nose back and forth along his cheek, letting him get used to feeling calm again. "It's all risky, Roo. All of it. We've talked about it before, and the facts are never going to change. But being married to you is worth it. Having to figure out how to potentially live without you is a risk I'm willing to take for the chance to be with you now."
"Fuck," he whispered, melting into your touch. 
"You're worth everything," you told him sincerely. "Getting to hold you right now is worth every bad feeling that might come later."
All he could do was nod, because he felt exactly the same way about you. But there was another layer. Another wrinkle. It was with a steadier voice that he managed to say, "I don't want to end up like my parents. Or worse... I don't want to miss the chance to meet the baby altogether."
You leaned away from him a little bit, running your knuckles gently along his cheek. "You promised me you would always fight for the chance to come home again."
"Always. Please, don't ever doubt that I will fight until my last breath, Baby Girl."
Now you had tears in your eyes. "I never knew I could feel this loved. And you've already given the Nugget so much of yourself through your notebooks and your little private conversations with my belly where you pretend I can't hear you." Bradley laughed as you touched his face and neck. You kissed his forehead and whispered, "He or she is going to be just like you. I can tell already. And you'll fight your way back home to find out for sure."
"I will," he promised, throat tight with love instead of fear this time. "God, I fucking adore you."
As he ran his thumb around the diamond in your engagement ring which once belonged to his mother, you said, "I know it."
Twenty minutes later, once Bradley felt almost completely calm again, you stood and disappeared into the kitchen. He missed your warmth immediately. It was late now, and he knew you both needed to get a good night of sleep, but you insisted you knew what else would make him feel better. Just when he was about to say that the only thing he wanted to do was hold you in bed, you returned with a plate and a steaming mug. 
You settled onto his lap again, so certain that was where you belonged and where he always wanted you. He took a sip of the tea while you nibbled on the lemon cupcake, then you held it up to his lips for him to take a bite. He ate half of it in one go, making you smile. 
When you took another nibble, he whispered, "I'll be home in no time. Back with my perfect wife. My family."
You gently shoved the rest of the cupcake into his mouth as you smiled and said, "We'll be here waiting for you."
You started kissing his scars as he chewed and muttered, "Let's go to bed, Sweetheart."
He was still thinking about his brief conversation with Jake as you stretched out on your back and let him run one big hand along your belly and down to your tattoo. Bradley touched you everywhere, memorizing the softness and flawless warmth of your body with the Nugget. He would come back home to this because he had to. He would be here to construct the jungle gym himself. There was simply no other choice. 
"I love you both."
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That phone call between Bradley and Jake made me cry. Bradley has been dreaming of that jungle gym playset in the backyard for so long, he needs the guarantee that it will happen for his Nugget even if he's not there to see it through to the end. BG always knows what to do when he's struggling, but she's not going to be there to take care of him while he's deployed. In the next one-shot, we'll see how Bradley and Payback are holding up while away. Thanks @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls and everyone who reads and interacts and makes this pairing so fun to write!
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soapisahimbo · 2 years ago
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Three's Company - John 'Soap' MacTavish & Simon 'Ghost' Riley
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Request by @st4rv1ng-m0uth:
Well I just finished reading uou nsfw alphabet for Soap and The idea you had under the dirty secret was just amazing so I would love to request threesome with Ghost and Johnny (also I think it if they kissed in the eiffel tower position that would be just *chef's kiss*)
Oh. My. God. This request was sent to me in January. I am so sorry that you had to wait this long, but I sincerely hope this makes up for the wait! This is a bit of a beast at 7200 words, which might not seem like a lot compared to some writers, but it is to me! I really, really, really hope you like it!
Contains heavy smut elements, so minors stay away!
warnings: threesome, fem!reader/female anatomy, overstimulation, soap and ghost get FILTHY with reader, eiffel tower position, oral sex, penetrative sex, semi-homoeroticism, may contain spelling errors despite checking, i fucking got carried away
You felt the world roll with a yelp and a whoosh; the floor came up to meet you, your back slammed against the mat and you knew that it was with just enough force to leave a bruise for a good week or so. Such was the way of Lieutenant Simon 'Ghost' Riley - he never actually hurt you, but he'd beat you up just enough for you to remember the lesson. To be fair though, you suspected he was going easy on you. Or, well, easier compared to the others he usually sparred with, just a tad.
With another quick sweeping motion, he pulled you by your arm to sit you up, only to slip into position behind you and wrap you up in a grip so tight you were sure that a boa constrictor would be considered child's play in comparison; one arm wrapped around your neck in a chokehold, your arm that he grabbed twisted at an uncomfortable angle, and his legs clamped around your midsection like a beartrap.
You could only hold for a few seconds before you tapped his arm with your free hand to signal submission and he released you in an instant, letting you roll over and get back up on your feet. He stood up as well, towering over you.
"I thought you said you weren't gonna let me 'fuck you over' today," he said, and you swore you could've heard a tone of mockery in his voice. The balaclava gave you a better look at his eyes than the skull-mask usually did, but it still kept any expression on his face obscured. If he even had any expressions to show.
"Shut up," you said. "You caught me off guard is all."
"Uh-huh. Isn't the whole point of this to train so you don't get caught off guard?"
Ghost had, much to your surprise, been the one to offer to train you. Not that you weren't capable, but his argument for it was that you would need to learn to take down the best and the most dangerous soldiers that you could come across on the battlefield, and he wanted to make sure you were well trained. Just learning to take down someone his size alone could be imperative to your survival. As such, the two of you had met up every other day to spar if able, and by now you had been going for at least a couple of months of the same routine.
"Well, sometimes even the best of us get caught off guard. It's just as important to learn how to regain your footing when you lose your balance as it is to keep it," you quipped, proud of your analogy.
"Well, you failed."
You sighed, planting your hands on your hips, and stared at him for a moment. "You can't just let me have a moment, can you?"
"No. You're not here to have 'moments', you're here to train. You won't be havin' any moments if you're dead."
You rolled your eyes, but you knew he had a point. "I hate it when you're right."
"It's a burden I carry much too often." He stepped away to grab a bottle of water and handed it to you. "You got cocky. You lost the second you thought you could beat me."
"Oh wow, kill my hopes and dreams, why don't you?" you mumbled sarcastically.
"Never underestimate your opponent, and never overestimate your own abilities. A bloated ego will never do you any good. If you ask me, I'd say Sergeant MacTavish has rubbed off a bit too much on you."
You noticed that he was looking past you, over your shoulder, and you turned to see the very man mentioned leaning up against the wall with a grin on his face.
"Awae widdya now, lieutenant. I swear to you I've never rubbed anythin' off on anyone. Least of all any pretty ladies." He turned his gaze to you and gave a wink.
You'd be lying if you said Soap MacTavish didn't have an effect on you. For the most part, you considered him a good and trustworthy friend, someone who you knew you could lean on in troubled times. But he was also an incessant tease with a rugged sort of charm, a man who harmlessly liked to push buttons and limits all the same, and looked at you with a certain kind of gleam in his eyes that made you feel just the tiniest little flutter in your stomach. You couldn't let him catch you checking him out, or he'd never let you hear the end of it.
"Too busy rubbing yourself," Ghost deadpanned. breaking you out of your little moment of reverie.
Soap chuckled. "You should try it, maybe it'd help you relax."
"Now now, boys," you said from behind the lip of your water bottle, about to take a sip, "play nice."
Soap stepped away from the wall to join you and Ghost on the mat. "I always play nice, wouldn't you say, lass? LT however - he might be nice to you, but he'd shove a boot up my arse at any given moment."
You scoffed. "If this is what it feels like when he's 'nice', I don't want to know what it feels like when he plays rough."
"Might get you to stay focused for once," Ghost grumbled.
"How 'bout I join in, eh?" Soap offered. "It's always good to have some variation in your life."
"You wanna teach her how to blabber her enemies to death?"
"You know I could give some good pointers."
You couldn't help but hesitate. Getting your ass handed to you by the Ghost was rough enough, but Ghost and Soap? You knew that despite all their bickering, they were a tight and dangerous pair that garnered a lot of awe and respect from their peers. On one hand, you probably couldn't find anyone better to train you even if you tried; on the other, you weren't sure how you'd make it through a session with both of them.
You heard Ghost let out a slight sigh. "Fine." He turned to you. "You go a couple of rounds with MacTavish, I'll watch, then we switch. Stay on your toes and stay. Focused."
He didn't seem to give you any say in the matter, so you were left with little other choice but to do as you were told. You put your bottle to the side, straightened the laces on your boots and took a deep breath. "Yessir."
Soap - Johnny, as he gave you special permission to call him, which otherwise seemed to be Ghost's sole privilege - made a habit of joining you for your regular sparring sessions, and while you definitely learned some very valuable lessons, they certainly put you through the ringer. You made the mistake of thinking that maybe the sergeant would have been a bit more easygoing compared to his masked counterpart, but while he kept up the usual light-hearted humour, he and Ghost gave you very little respite. You were however making improvement, so much so that even Ghost complimented you on it, so you kept your complaining to a minimum.
You couldn't help but feel like there was something hanging in the air, though. You tried to brush it off as just good-natured competition between them, but you knew that wasn't quite it. After about two months of training with them, you started to notice some interesting behaviour to say the least.
They were usually already there when you arrived, keeping a hushed conversation that quickly ended once you entered the room. Probably some confidential stuff, you thought.
They were liberal with slower walkthroughs, one always putting their hands on you to adjust your position when grappling with the other. They're just being thorough, you thought.
They kept bantering, and you couldn't help but feel like they were showing off. For you or for each other, you couldn't tell, but they had a certain way of butting heads over what to do and how to do it better than the other. That's just the way they are, you thought.
By the end of each session, it felt like something was ready to snap, but you couldn't for the life of you put your finger on it. You found yourself waiting for something to happen, but you didn't know what, and you couldn't tell if you felt relieved or disappointed when nothing did. The more that feeling kept growing, the more that snap felt ever imminent, and it didn't seem like you could do anything but brace.
It wasn't until you happened to overhear a conversation between them that the feeling seemed to gain some sort of validity. You didn't mean to snoop, but just as you were about to step through the door, you heard Johnny mention your name, and you stopped right next to the doorway.
"We'd be going against an entire library's worth of paragraphs," you heard Ghost respond to whatever he had said.
"You keep saying that, but you still haven't said that you don't want it," he scoffed. "I'm pretty sure Price has had his fair share, and I know for a fact that Gaz has."
"Fuck's sake, Johnny."
"Listen, I'm not dumb, all right?"
"I have my doubts."
"Fuck off. Look, I'm not talking about pulling some dirty tricks or trying to persuade her into doing something she doesn't want to do. If she doesn't want anything to do with it, that's it, end of story."
"Do you realize she's in our squad? This will only serve to create unnecessary complications. We are her superiors - ever stop to think about how that'll look if anyone were to find out? Get your head out of your fucking ass."
"Of course I've thought about it! I'm aware of how fucked this is. But I also know you're as deep in it as I am." There was a moment's heavy pause and you could feel it even from where you were standing.
"We're done talking about this, Johnny."
You took this as your cue to step in and found the two of them glaring at each other, but they didn't seem to notice you until you spoke up. "Done talking about what?" you said.
It was almost as if though you had poured buckets of icy water over them with how they jolted at the sound of your voice, their heads snapped in your direction and they stared at you with such wide eyes that you thought they would pop out of their sockets. If their topic of discussion hadn't sounded so serious before you entered, you probably would've laughed.
They stayed quiet and frozen for a few more moments. "Is..." you started. "Is there something I should know?"
Johnny seemed to splutter back to reality. "No! No, no, not at all, we were just-"
"How much did you hear?" Ghost interrupted, demanding but apprehensive.
You shrugged. "Enough to know you were talking about me, but that's about it." You squinted your eyes at them. "The fuck are you guys up to that you have to be this secretive about it? Are you in trouble?"
"No," said Johnny, "no, we're not in any trouble. And neither are you, we were just... discussing something."
"Uh-huh, uh-huh. Listen, if there's anything I need to know, I'd prefer it if you just told me. Especially if the two of you are gonna keep sneaking around behind my back like this."
You had never seen them this stiff and... awkward. Like two teenage boys getting caught watching porn by their mom. Their eyes flitted between each other and you, contemplating whether to tell you and how much. They seemed to come to some silent agreement before turning to you once more.
"Not here," Ghost grumbled. "We can head to my room. It's... a bit more secluded."
"An invitation to Simon Riley's private quarters?" you tried to joke. "Wow, this must be something special."
Neither of them responded, instead Ghost just stepped by you and Johnny gestured for you to follow. Walking down the halls, that feeling in the air was heavier than ever, and you still couldn't tell what it was or if it made you excited or nervous; if it was something serious or just something that they'd built up in their heads to be bigger than it actually was.
"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you guys were up to something illegal," you said after walking in awkward silence for far longer than you were comfortable with. "Is this the part where you tell me you've been running an underground drug ring all this time?"
Johnny chuckled. "Not illegal, technically, just..." He gave an odd glance at you. "Maybe a bit questionable."
Ghost's room was not quite what you expected it to be. Clean and tidy, well-lit, organized. You'd half-expected there to be a row of skull-masks to be hanging neatly on the wall - one for every day of the week. Or mood. Maybe he hid them in his closet.
"All right," you said, watching him take a seat at his desk. "Are you guys gonna tell me what's up?"
The men glanced at each other once more. "We, uh," Johnny began. "There's something we've been thinking about. A... proposition, of sorts?"
Ghost groaned. "Don't call it that. We're not proposing or offering anything here, all right? We just need to get this out, clear the fuckin' air."
"Fine, don't lose yer fuckin' head. Listen, we don't expect anything off of you, or think that this is something you'd want, we just don't want you to get the wrong idea or get caught up in something you don't want to be involved in."
"This is starting to sound more and more like a drug ring after all," you muttered.
"It's not, all right, I can promise you that. It's just that... after some time, LT and I feel like you've been doing very well during practice and we're quite proud of you. But we also feel like there's something we can't quite... overlook."
You couldn't get over how they were acting. Johnny was usually such a cocky and confident man, you'd never seen him struggle to find the words he wanted to say.
"Ok, and?"
"Just get to the point," Ghost grumbled.
"This isn't exactly an easy conversation here, LT, I'm tryin' to-"
"This was your fuckin' idea, Soap, you get to see it through."
"Guys-" you tried, but to no avail.
"You wouldn't be here if you didn't want it too!"
"I want you to get it out of your fuckin' system so you can shut up about it for once!"
"Go fuck yerself, you're just as involved as-"
"You're the one that has been scheming about this shit since day one, don't fuckin' pin it on me!"
"For fuck's sake!"
You honestly wished you knew what was going on, but between their arguing and your own confusion, you didn't even realize Johnny had walked up to you until he grabbed you by the wrist, pulled you to him and planted his lips on yours. You weren't quite sure what to make of this or what to focus on - his lips were far softer than you ever would've thought they'd be, and his hands, now cupping your cheeks, were far gentler than you had experienced before. He broke off just as suddenly as he'd grabbed you and you felt your head spin, gripping onto his wrists for some sort of stability.
"Whoa..." you mumbled.
"Fuckin' hell," you heard Ghost growl.
"Sorry," Johnny muttered, seemingly just as dazed as you. "I lost my cool there for a second."
You couldn't help but chuckle. You weren't sure what to make of this, but a part of you wanted to just go with it. "I mean, I didn't really mind it."
"You serious?"
"Yeah. Didn't think this was what you were going for, but it could've been worse, I guess."
His face split into a grin before he leaned in and kissed you again, more calm and controlled this time. You weren't sure how long you stood there for until you heard Ghost clearing his throat, and you flinched at the sound, blushing profusely once you remembered where you were.
"Sorry to interrupt you, lovebirds, but if this is how it's gonna go, you can just head to your own rooms."
Johnny glanced over at him. You could see the gears turning before he looked at you, planted another gentle kiss onto you lips and then turned you towards the lieutenant, placing himself behind you. He put his hands on your waist and leaned his chin against your shoulder.
"Come on now, LT. Isn't this what we came here for?"
You looked between them, watching another lazy grin appear on Johnny's face and Ghost's hands clench at the armrests on his desk-chair. Slowly, you felt it click in your head.
"This is why you guys have been acting so weird? You both have a thing for me?"
"That's one way to put it."
"So, what, you want me to choose between you or something? You guys have been having some weird competition over who gets the girl?"
Ghost stood up. "Not quite," he said. He stared at you and you couldn't quite tell if maybe there was some sort of jealousy or if he wanted to leave you be.
"It's more of a mutual desire, really," Johnny mumbled into your hair.
Ghost stepped towards you, slowly. Gently, he grabbed your chin and tilted it up and stared into your eyes. He ran his thumb along your jaw and then up to your bottom lip. "This ok?" he asked quietly.
Oh.
Oh.
It made sense now - or at least a bit more than it did before. Their weird behaviour, their conversation, the way they'd kept dancing around the point. To be fair, you would've expected the drug ring long before you'd ever thought of this.
You took a moment to think it through; this wasn't exactly something that happened every day. Just like Ghost had said earlier, this would not look good if anyone else were to find out. All three of you would end up in heaps of trouble, them possibly more than you. You knew, logically, that it was probably for the best to end it right here, to say "thanks, but no thanks", walk away and pretend like this never happened. They definitely knew this, too, but there was something about the warmth emanating from them, enveloping you; the touch, that tension in the air. That snap that had been hanging over your heads this entire time, like a rubber band pulled to its absolute limit. You knew that you should say no to this.
But how could you?
Before you even knew what you were doing, you nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, it's ok."
You could tell that they both relaxed significantly, Johnny pressing himself closer to your back and squeezing at your waist as Ghost reached up and pulled his mask off. No. Simon. You'd seen him before, but it didn't make it any less palpable to see him again.
He gave you a moment to stare at his face before he leaned in and kissed you, surprisingly much gentler than the sergeant. Your heart was already pounding and your mind was racing, not knowing what to focus on; Simon's lips on yours, Johnny's tongue at your neck, their hands caressing you all over, stroking and kneading and wandering. You didn't know what to do with your own, so they wandered as well, grabbing at their shirts, at their arms, at their hair, their belts.
"Look at this, LT," Johnny spoke softly as his hands slipped in under your shirt and up to your chest, "we had nothing to worry about."
Simon hummed into your mouth, his tongue slipping in past your lips. His hand moved downwards, cupping your mound and rubbing at it, and your hips tilted back, ass grinding right into Johnny. You broke the kiss with a gasp, leaning your head back to catch your breath.
"That feel good, bonnie?" Johnny chuckled into your ear and cupped your breasts over your bra, squeezing. "Want us to keep going?"
You nodded. "Yes! Yeah, I want- keep going."
You felt a tug and looked down to see Simon unbuckling your belt. He unbuttoned your pants, opening them up and slipping a hand right down your underwear, finding a slick heat in his wake, and your mouth fell open in a soft gasp. He groaned and rubbed circles around your hole, as if taking in the sensation of your wetness.
"Fffuck me," he whispered. "She's fucking soaked."
Johnny grabbed the bottom of your shirt and pulled it up to your chest, exposing your skin and leaning over your shoulder to get a view of what his lieutenant was doing. "Give 'er here, LT."
You watched with utter surprise and fascination as Simon pulled his hand back out from your pants, fingers glistening, and held it right up to Johnny's face, who took his fingers into his mouth without an ounce of hesitation.
"How's she taste?" Simon asked.
Johnny hummed against the hand as he sucked and licked it clean before releasing it and turned his head to look you dead in the eyes. "Like a fuckin' dream."
You whimpered as Simon ran his now wet hand over your throat, then down between your breasts, over your stomach. He then grabbed onto the hem of your pants and started pulling them down, leaving you bare.
"Oh, shit," you breathed as he knelt down in front of you.
He untied and yanked your boots off before removing your pants and underwear completely. "Lift her leg up for me, will ya, Johnny?"
Johnny shifted his weight and you felt his chest at your shoulder, holding a firm grip with his arm around your waist before he scooped up one of your legs by the crook of your knee. He grinned at you and leaned in to press his lips against yours one more, far more eager and heated than he was before. It was hard for you to focus though, as you felt Simon's large hands rub up along the inside of your thighs. Before you knew it, you felt him press his face in between your legs, and at the feeling of his lips on you, you gasped, and Johnny took the chance to slip his tongue into your mouth.
You don't know how they did it, but they seemed to work in perfect tandem. Johnny's tongue stroking against yours, Simon's tongue lapping at your pussy, driving you out of your mind with pleasure. In an attempt to ground yourself, you tried to find something to hold on to - one hand made it's way to Simon's head and grabbed a tight hold on his hair and had him groan into your core. The other found Johnny's arm around your waist, gripping and digging your nails into his skin.
You thought you felt a wet drop run down your leg and you weren't sure if it was your own or Simon's making, but he gave you very little time to consider it as he slipped a calloused finger into you. You broke away from Johnny's kiss with a moan and your head fell back against his shoulder.
He chuckled. "Y'feel good, bonnie? Is your pussy all wet and nice for us?"
You couldn't do much else but nod fervently. "Yes," you moaned, "yes, I'm-!" You felt another finger push inside and your hips canted against Simon's face. "Fuck!"
"Just like that, baby," Johnny mumbled into your ear. "Look at you now, hm? Gonna watch you cum all over his face like a good fuckin' girl."
The shivers that ran through your body at his words met with the heat at the pit of your stomach from Simon's mouth and fingers and you trembled. You thought you'd shake apart, but they held onto you so tightly that they might has well have been glued to you. You felt Simon's fingers curl inside you, finding the spot that you'd always had trouble reaching on your own, and his tongue worked between your folds and then up to your clit. The volume of the moan that left you startled you, and for a brief moment you were worried that someone else would hear, but it only seemed to spur your company on. Johnny ground his crotch against your rear with another chuckle and buried his face in your neck, licking and nibbling at your jawline as Simon sucked on your clit and pumped his fingers in and out, pushing against that spot again and again and again.
"Ah, f-fuck, fuckfuckfuck," you panted, "thi-this is s-so fucki- I'm-!"
"Breathe," Johnny groaned against your skin, "breathe. You're so good, so fuckin' good to us. Cum on his face now, bonnie, go on, cum on his face and then you can cum on our cocks, yeah?"
Another wave of shivers had you quivering in his arms. Simon pressed his face further into your pussy, grunting like a man starved with his free hand gripping onto your thigh, and Johnny moaned at you further to "cum, baby, cum for us, I promise it'll feel so good." The heat in between your thighs felt like it was starting to boil, a sort of pressure getting stronger and stronger and stronger, condensing into a white-hot pinpoint of pleasure at your core, and Johnny cooed, Simon fucked his fingers into you and you squirmed between them until the pressure finally burst and you came with a cry and a gush over Simon's hand and mouth. Your legs shook as Simon worked you through your orgasm and you surely would've collapsed if wasn't for Johnny holding you up. You couldn't stop the sounds you let out, your hips twitching and shaking, the pleasure almost becoming too much as Simon still didn't break away, and you whined trying to get away from his onslaught.
"S-Simon," you whimpered, "too much, too- fuck, I can't!"
Johnny lifted you slightly and turned, just enough to move you away from the lieutenant. "Easy there, LT," he said when Simon glared at him and placed your leg back down. "Gotta pace ourselves, yeah?" He then gestured to you to lift your arms up so he could pull your shirt off, and then removed your bra only to fill his hands with your breasts.
Simon took a deep breath, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. He stared at your pussy, slick and wet and hot and delicious, and licked his fingers clean before he stood up. He cupped your cheeks in his hands, leaning down to kiss you, and you could taste yourself on him. As if running on instinct, you tugged at his belt and he sighed into your mouth, staring into your eyes as you unbuckled and unbuttoned his pants.
"That what you want, sweetheart?"
You nodded, and then turned to look over your shoulder at Johnny. You arched your back, rubbing your ass against his groin and he took it as a signal to get rid of his pants as well. He grinned and made quick work of his clothes as you reached into Simon's boxers and pulled his member out. It was hot to the touch, thick and heavy in your hand, and you felt your mouth water at the sight of it.
"Go on, bonnie," Johnny said as he grabbed two handfuls of your buttcheeks and rubbed his cock between them with a sigh. "Can't wait to fuck you."
You leaned forward, bending over for them. Simon gently gathered up your hair in his hand and rubbed over your shoulder blades with the other, crossing with Johnny's hand in the middle as he rubbed at your lower back. You wrapped your fingers around the base of Simon's cock and licked a line along the length of him, and you heard him groan.
"Ain't she a pretty sight, LT?" Johnny sighed. You felt him rub the head of his member against your clit.
Simon hummed, watching you with a slack jaw as put your mouth on him. "Like a fuckin' dream," he mumbled.
You wrapped your lips around the head of him and sucked gently. You weren't sure if you'd be able to take all of him in your mouth, but damn it if you weren't going to try. You heard him breathe out a curse as you worked your hand along his shaft and bobbed your head, gently trying to coax more of him in. Johnny pressed closer against your pussy, rubbing his cock against it before he lined himself up properly. You braced yourself, trying to keep a clear head as he pushed a little bit more and more, until the glans of his head finally entered you and he easily slid inside you with a moan of near relief.
"Ah, Christ, shit, you're so fucking soft," he breathed. He pushed his hips a bit harder against you, inadvertently knocking you closer to Simon and pushing his cock deeper down your throat.
You choked for barely a second before Simon pulled back. "Easy, Johnny!"
"Sorry, sorry..."
Simon stroked your cheek and went to ask if you were ok, but you wrapped your lips around him again and the words died right on the tip of his tongue. Slowly but surely, you found a rhythm of letting Johnny's momentum push you forward and let Simon's cock sink further into your mouth and then pushing yourself back onto Johnny's. The heat was overwhelming, but addictive, and you felt the buildup in your core once more, your legs already quivering.
Simon held onto your hair, stroking your face and your neck and your shoulders, completely silent save for a few sighs. Johnny, however, seemed like he couldn't keep his mouth shut.
"Fuck, we should've done this sooner, you're fuckin' perfect, bonnie," he grunted as he fucked into you deeper and harder. "This fuckin' ass- I knew this ass was perfect the moment I saw it, baby, and this pussy, too, this pussy is heaven." He stretched you perfectly, and you didn't think you'd ever be able to find anyone that could compare to this.
Moaning against Simon, you braced your hands against his hips, doing the best you could to swallow him down, but with each thrust from Johnny, it got harder and harder to focus.
"Awh, fuckin' shit, you're fuckin' grippin' me," Johnny rambled, "yeah, you're gonna cum on this cock, lass, I know you are, I know you fuckin' are, do it, baby, do it."
Faster and harder, deeper and stronger, he thrusted and thrusted and he praised and moaned for you to cum. He reached his hand around, slipped his fingers in between your thighs to rub your clit and you shook, almost unable to make a sound as you still held Simon as far deep down your throat as you could. You could barely prepare for the next wave of pleasure that washed over you, and you came with yet another gush, and Johnny let out an almost triumphant moan.
"Fuck yes, baby, that's it. Thaaat's it, good girl." He kept going, a bit slower and a bit softer, but still enough to have you shake. "Think you can do it again, sweetie? I'm gonna need you to do that again, I wan-"
Simon suddenly reached up one hand and snatched Johnny by the mohawk and pulled him close over you, the other hand wrapped around the sergeant's throat. You were squeezed in between them, Johnny's cock pushed deeper into your pussy, and Simon's felt like it was nearly all the way down your esophagus. In a moment of shocked silence, as your eyes rolled back, Simon kissed Johnny harshly, parting with an almost punishing bite to the other man's bottom lip.
"Do you ever shut the fuck up?" he growled. He leaned in again, forcing Johnny's head to tilt as he pushed his tongue into his mouth, and broke away with another bite of his lip and a thin string of saliva hanging between them. "I think I've got just the thing, actually."
He pushed Johnny away, hard enough to have him slip out of you. He was considerably gentler with you, pulling his cock out of your mouth and cupping your cheeks as you coughed to lift your head up to give you a gentle kiss.
"You ok, sweetheart?" You nodded, the soreness in your throat not all too bad considering what you'd just had down it. Pleased, he turned you around, and you saw that Johnny had stumbled onto the bed. "How about you and I," Simon whispered in your ear as he ran his hands over your breasts, "teach him a lesson for once?"
Before you could answer, he picked you up. He walked towards the bed, sat down at the headboard and leaned back. He adjusted you on his lap, your back against his chest, and placed his knees on the inside of yours before he slowly spread them apart as Johnny watched from the foot of the bed. Johnny smirked and began to crawl towards you, but before he could reach you fully, Simon reached up and yanked his hair again.
"Easy now, pup," he growled. "Put my fuckin' cock in her pussy before you even think about doin' anythin' else."
There was only a tiny moment of stunned silence, but it was heavy nonetheless. You didn't think they'd reach a point where they actually got involved with each other, but as you watched Johnny take a deep shaky breath and his eyes widen, you found that you hoped that maybe they'd go a bit further.
Johnny swallowed nervously before reaching his hand out to grab Simon. Hesitantly, but almost mischievously, he wrapped his fingers around the member and moved his hand up and down once.
"No games, Johnny," Simon warned, and Johnny actually chuckled.
He then lined the head of Simon's cock up with your hole and held it there as you sank down on it. You gasped, having to pace yourself at the thickness of it. Simon held a gentle hand just above your mound, gently pushing you down as he still held a firm grip on Johnny's hair.
"Easy, sweetheart, no need to rush," he mumbled.
Johnny could only helplessly watch as you slowly worked the entirety of Simon's length into you, and you thought you maybe saw a single drop of drool roll from the corner of his mouth.
"So I don't get to join in on the fun anymore?" he quipped, but you could hear a slight quiver to his voice.
"I thought I told you to shut up," Simon muttered.
You shivered as you tried to adjust to his size, rolling your hips once with a moan. He was thicker than Johnny, thick enough that you felt him press against every side of your inner walls, as well as the g-spot that they'd already worked up to high sensitivity before.
"There you go." Simon tugged Johnny closer by his hair. "Now then. Why don't we put that mouth of yours to some good fuckin' use for once, huh?"
He then yanked Johnny's head down between your legs and pushed his face into your pussy, and even in his own surprise it didn't even take a second before he began working his tongue between your folds. You cried out, feeling like you still hadn't quite come down from your previous orgasm, but even if you wanted, you wouldn't have been able to get away with how Simon wrapped his arm tightly around your waist and rolled his hips up. Your head fell back and you tried to find some way to brace yourself, any way, as every brush of Johnny's tongue and every thrust of Simon's cock drove you further and further out of your mind. You thought you maybe came once more, but you couldn't be sure - every sensation seemed to melt into one and you were so high-strung that you might as well be having just one drawn-out and consistent orgasm at this point.
Simon kept Johnny's head in firm position between your legs. "How's that feel, love? Is his mouth as good on your pussy as it is at talking shit?"
Johnny groaned in what sounded like some sort of protest, but he never made any attempt at moving away. He lapped diligently at your pussy, sighing and moaning against you, licking around your hole where you were split open on Simon.
"Fuck, I-" you managed to croak out, almost forgetting how to speak. "I'm gonna- you're gonna be the death of me."
Simon let go of Johnny's hair and grabbed your legs, pulling your knees up to your chest. Johnny kept his mouth on you and you let out a whine nearing a sob as Simon began rocking his hips upward faster.
"Don't you worry, sweetheart, just relax. Breathe and relax."
In a matter of seconds, Johnny had his lips around your clit and sucked, and you cried out his name, legs shaking as he forced yet another orgasm out of you. You were sure you were losing your mind - there was no way this was actually happening, no way that you could actually feel this. You were only more and more convinced of this as Johnny continued licking, eager to get every drop.
"Fuck!" you whined. "Fuck, Johnny, Simon, I-!"
Simon pushed Johnny away, planted his feet into the mattress to adjust his angle and then pounded into you with some sort of newly found energy. Johnny wrapped his hand around his own cock, jerking it in rhythm with Simon's thrusts and leaned back down between your legs with a wide open mouth and his tongue out.
"One last time," Simon groaned. "One more, just one more."
Your legs tried to squeeze together on their own, but Simon's grip was too strong and you could do little else but grab onto whatever was near and hold as you came once more over Johnny's face, him and Simon following shortly after. With a grunt, Simon pushed himself as deep into you as he could get and you felt a sticky heat fill you up, and Johnny reared up, moaning aloud as he came all over where you and Simon were conjoined. He nearly fell over, head falling onto your stomach.
The only sound that broke the otherwise heavy silence was panting. You weren't sure if you could move or if even the slightest shift would have you break apart completely; it sure felt like it would. Simon wrapped his arms around you, planting soft kisses along your shoulder and neck. You thought Johnny might have fallen asleep where he laid, but he took a deep, deep breath and turned his head to press a few kisses around your bellybutton.
"Shit," he mumbled against you, "that was..." Neither you or Simon were able to respond, but it didn't seem to bother him as he glanced up at you with a chuckle. "I don't think anything will live up to that."
He pushed himself up to his hands and knees and crawled over you, his hips between yours and Simon's legs. He sighed almost dreamily and gave you a sweet kiss.
"We did a real number on you, huh?"
You couldn't help but laugh, still finding this whole ordeal impossible. "You think?"
"We should get her to the shower," Simon mumbled. "Clean her up."
Johnny nodded. "Sounds like a solid plan. Although I've half a mind to just lay down and knock out."
Simon leaned forward to sit up. "Shower first. Then knock out."
You whined suddenly at the movement, his cock still sitting snug inside you. The two men instantly froze, staring wide-eyed at you. "S-Sorry, it's ok, I'm just- I'm sensitive. I feel like you guys gave me a week's worth of fucking in a matter of minutes."
"Shit, we took it too far, didn't we?" Johnny said, his hands fluttering over your hips.
"No, no! I enjoyed it. A lot. But it's not like I'm particularly used to that sort of... conquest."
Simon sighed as Johnny chuckled. "I'm gonna try to be gentle, but we will need to get you to the shower nonetheless."
You nodded and the two of them looked at each other, coming to yet another one of those silent agreements that they were so good at.
"C'mere," Johnny said. "Sit up and wrap your arms around me, yeah?"
You grabbed onto his shoulder and pulled yourself up to him, wrapping your arms around his neck. He wrapped his around your torso and began to lift as Simon pushed you up from beneath until he slipped out of you. You felt your legs shake once more and the cum dripping out of you as you drew in a shaky breath.
"There you go," Simon said, much softer than you'd heard him before.
He turned and stood up as Johnny scooped you up into his arms. It was like they moved in unison to look after you - Simon walking first into the bathroom to pull aside the shower curtain and turning the water on as Johnny followed him closely behind. Johnny then stepped into the shower and gently placed you down on your feet, reaching out a hand to feel the temperature of the water before he guided you in under the stream. Simon gathered up a few towels before he joined you and you couldn't help but laugh. This shower didn't seem like it was meant to hold more than one person at a time and yet they both seemed adamant to look after you.
Johnny crouched down to clean your legs and to gently wash off the fluids between them, trying not to rub too much at already overly sensitive spots. Simon scrubbed your back, gently massaging your shoulders and scratching the skin at the base of your skull. You were sure you were about to fall asleep then and there, but they made quick work of it, before they stepped out with you and dried you off with a fresh towel.
Simon grabbed you a t-shirt and a pair of boxers that Johnny helped you put on before they essentially tucked you in. They laid down on either side of you and as they settled down, you felt a new sense of calm wash over you.
"Rest up, love," Simon said. "I think we might have pushed it a bit too much after all."
"It's fine," you mumbled, feeling drowsy. "I liked it. We should do it again some time."
Johnny chuckled. "I'm sure we will."
It got quiet, and you felt yourself slip into a slumber, held closely between them, warm and snug. But just before you fell asleep, you thought you heard them speak.
"LT." "Hm?" "What happens next?" "What do you mean?" "I mean, is this a thing now? I know you said this was to get it out of our systems, but I honestly don't think we achieved that." A sigh. "I know." "So what happens next?" "Dunno. We'll sleep on it, Johnny. Talk about it in the morning." "Mm. Good idea. G'night, I guess." "Night."
tagging: @deadbranch @argella1300
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cocklessboy · 2 years ago
Text
I see a lot of people saying that gender-affirming health care like top surgery for trans people like myself should be freely available (which is correct), but one of the reasons they often give is that top surgery is very safe and has a very low rate of complications compared to other surgeries. And I often see transphobes clutching their pearls over the few people who do have complications. What about them?! What if you're one of the unlucky ones?! Should we really let those transes risk it??!!!
Setting aside the fact that no one raises such concerns over other types of surgery, I'd like to use myself as an example for anyone who needs one.
In May of 2022 I had top surgery (double mastectomy). The surgery was done by a gynecological surgeon, not a plastic surgeon, because that way my insurance would cover it.
The surgeon did his job and removed the breast tissue, but he did not make it look pretty. I have dog-ears at both ends of both scars (extra bits of skin that hang off in a very unappealing fashion), my chest still looks unnaturally flat with no muscle or fat despite a lot of working out, and one of the stitches didn't heal properly and was left as an open wound through "secondary healing" for several months before it finally healed over into a very large scab (and eventually a very large scar). My nipples are uneven and irregular and look... well, just awful, really. Due to bad genetic luck, I wound up with keloid scars which, instead of getting smaller and lighter over time, have instead expanded, becoming thicker and darker. Worst of all, I now have chronic nerve pain in my chest. My GP thinks the surgeon must have hit a nerve during the procedure, and now I have random sharp pains all over my chest even now, nearly ten months later. The pain might improve with time, or it might not.
I basically had almost every possible complication one can have from this surgery short of infection or death. Some of the aesthetics might be fixable with more surgery (though plastic surgery will be expensive). Some are probably permanent. I might never feel comfortable taking my shirt off in public again. I might have to tattoo over the scars.
And pay attention to this next bit, because it's the most important part of this whole post: I do not regret the surgery. Even with all the complications and the ugly state of my chest and the pain. If someone said they could push a button and make it so that the surgery never happened and I'd have a perfect, unmarred chest with C-cup breasts again, I would tell them to take their button and fuck right off. Because even with basically the worst of all possible outcomes, that surgery was the best thing that ever happened to me.
I don't feel good about taking my shirt off in front of people now. I do think my chest is ugly. But it's a male chest now. When I put on a t-shirt, it rests flat against my chest. No one will ever mistake me for a woman again. I'll never have to wear a bra or binder ever again.
The dysphoria I felt from having breasts was so severe that a hideously scarred chest and chronic pain are vastly preferable. The euphoria I feel when I look in the mirror with a shirt on is something I never knew I was capable of feeling.
And it's my fucking body, and it's up to me what I do with it. If I wanted to tattoo myself from head to toe, or file my teeth into fangs, or have a doctor break my legs and surgically implant extensions to make me taller, that's my right because it's my body. The fact that all those things are regarded as basically acceptable (if a little weird), but I had to have a dehumanizing interview with an old cis psychiatrist who hates trans people and wants us all sterilized just to get a piece of paper giving me permission to have my tits removed, is fucking absurd.
Top surgery (of any kind) is generally very safe, and complications are rare. But even with the worst outcome, a trans person will basically never regret it.
And frankly, if a cis woman wants her tits cut off, or a cis man wants a pair of boobs to play with on his own chest, more power to them because literally who gives a fuck what people do to their own bodies? I saw a dude on TV when I was a kid who'd tattooed his whole body to look like a cat, filed his teeth into fangs, and had loads of plastic surgery to surgically implant whiskers and make his face look more feline. It was weird! But literally no one said that should be banned because he might regret it. It's his body to do whatever weird shit he wants with.
The next time someone clutches their pearls and kicks and screams about how you can't let someone permanently alter their body in a way they might regret, feel free to point to me and my complete and utter lack of regret.
(Or have a little fun with it, go hard in the other direction, and say you absolutely agree, which is why we should ban ALL non-emergency surgeries until the patient has been FULLY evaluated by three psychiatrists - along with tattoos and piercings. Oh, and ballet lessons for anyone under the age of 25, since ballet changes the structure of a child's body FOREVER.)
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iloveacaibowls111 · 1 month ago
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The Fairest of Them All
SYNOPYSIS: ust a little fluffy oneshot about you, Sukuna's wife, and the vibes that are occurring everyday you get me?
A/N: Cute little fluff. Obviously, Sukuna here is a softie and not like his sadistic self :)
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A small cherry blossom flower softly landed on your arm, its delicate touch tickling your senses. You glance down, captivated by its fragile beauty. The blossom was a gentle thing, soft and serene—a stark contrast to you. Growing up, your mother often chastised you for your brash, impulsive nature, warning that no husband would want a wife who acted on whims without a second thought. So, as you matured, you did your best to find your place, to practice patience with yourself—all in hopes that your future husband wouldn’t resent your habit of speaking your mind.
Everything changed when you were promised to Ryomen Sukuna, a fierce ruler infamous for his cruelty and violence. Your parents were horrified when their advisors suggested this union, fearing for their beloved daughter’s safety. Yet, despite Sukuna’s brutal reputation, the advisors insisted that no one in the land could better protect you. Reluctantly, your parents agreed, and you were wed to the most feared man in Japan.
When you first met him, his interest was piqued by your impulsive nature—something that mirrored his own. “So, why did you burn down that entire town again?” Curiosity got the better of you, and you couldn’t resist asking about his most recent outburst.
“The leader of the town said my face was an abominable mess,” Sukuna grumbled, sitting cross-legged across from you as you embroidered a pattern onto his new kimono.
“The audacity! He deserved it,” you teased, flashing him a cheeky grin. “Honestly, though, your face is far from an abominable mess. It’s wonderful.”
“Hmm, are you teasing me?” Sukuna asked, a mock pout forming on his lips. You couldn’t help but laugh. The fierce king, feared by all, was pouting because he thought you were teasing him.
“No, not at all. I’m serious. You’re probably prettier than I am,” you replied, pausing your embroidery as you clutched your stomach from laughing so hard.
“Stop it at once, I command you,” Sukuna demanded, his voice rising to feign anger. You tried to compose yourself, but it was no use. Suddenly, you felt his arms wrap around you—four of them, encircling you. “Good, you’ve stopped laughing.”
Before he could react, you started to tickle him. Though your efforts had little effect, it quickly sparked a playful tickling war between the two of you. His fingers merely hovering over you sent you into fits of giggles.
“So, you really are just a cute little softie behind your ‘tough’ exterior, aren’t you?” You bemused, laying on his chest while playing with one of his hands.
“Nah, just for you,” he responded while caressing your soft hair, one of his fingers interlacing with yours.
Sukuna’s servants and guards suddenly saw a new side of him that he had reserved for you. He would be so gentle with you as if you could break at an instance, which you probably could given how strong he was. He was playful, taking part in your silly antics and so called ‘pranks’. Finally, he was showing to everyone that he was capable of love and letting someone in his life. Although, he had concubines that were at his beck and call, he never truly let someone in as he did with you.
“You know when my mother was pregnant with me, she was starving because we were so poor. I had a twin brother in the womb but apparently I had eaten him to avoid starving to death myself.” Sukuna murmured, you two were lying outside soaking up the remaining sunshine before the winter cold would settle. The two of you were lying on your backs, head facing each other while your feet pointed in opposing directions. “That’s probably why I look the way I do now.”
You listened intently, not wanting to interrupt him as he rarely shared the details of his childhood. “I think a part of her always hated me for that so that’s probably why she left me. But then again, it’s not my fault that my brother wasn’t strong enough to eat me first.” He reasoned, shutting his eyes to think.
“Well, I think that you were just a little embryo in your mother’s stomach, that barely even counts as you.” You responded, tilting your head to face him. “I think all children deserve parents but not all parents deserve children. You didn’t deserve what happened, if she was starving so much why would she even want to have children to begin with.”
Sukuna just shrugged, his eyes opening to face yours. “Well, I promise that if we ever choose to have children, I won’t act as if they owe me. I owe them everything.” You happily stated. Sukuna couldn’t help but laugh at your decisiveness.
“Of course, my queen.” His four arms reached to grip your waist and shoulders before manhandling you to face him. He snuggled his face into the crook of your neck, taking in your scent. The two of you just lay out in the sun, enjoying each other’s company.
Before he met you, Sukuna would demand death for anyone who defied him, but now, he merely sent them away with a harsh word. The correlation between your presence and his softer demeanor didn’t go unnoticed, though sometimes his anger still got the better of him.
“Y/N! Where are you?” Sukuna’s booming voice echoed through the palace halls. You were sitting in front of your vanity, where your handmaiden was brushing your hair.
“I’m in my room!” You called back, hoping he’d hear you.
Suddenly, the door burst open, and Sukuna stormed in with a very frightened concubine named Yuki. His grip on her arm was so tight, you worried it might snap.
“I found this one demanding a village be annihilated,” he growled, his fury palpable. The statement confused you, considering how much Sukuna usually enjoyed causing chaos.
“I thought you’d be into that sort of thing?” You tilted your head, genuinely puzzled.
“Yes, but not without my permission. And then she dared to say it was your idea,” Sukuna’s eyes searched yours, questioning the truth behind Yuki’s claim. The concubine looked at you with pleading eyes.
“Uh, yes, it was me,” you quickly blurted out. “I just hated the way they, um, dressed up?”
“You? The same person who scolded me for killing a spider because it had a spider-wife and spider-children to go home to?” Sukuna could barely contain his amusement. Though still angry at Yuki, the way you were trying to protect her made him remember why he loved you so much.
“Y-yes. I’m turning a new leaf. I want to be more like you,” you said, walking up to him and gently prying his hand off Yuki’s arm. “Now, let Yuki go, and we can talk about this in private.” Sukuna stayed still for a moment before nodding. Yuki shot you a grateful look as she hurried out.
You sat on the bed, looking expectantly at Sukuna. “You can leave now, Hoshiko,” you said softly to your handmaiden. She bowed and exited, leaving you alone with Sukuna, who stood, arms crossed, leaning against the wall, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.
“I’m not stupid, you know,” he said, raising a brow.
You smiled, your heart racing. “I know you’re not. That’s why I thought you’d see through her little scheme.”
Sukuna stepped closer, the intensity of his gaze softening. “And why would you take the blame for her?”
“Because,” you started, cheeks warming, “she’s just a small thing. I didn’t want you to hurt her. Plus, I knew you wouldn’t do anything to me.”
He tilted his head, a smirk playing on his lips. “Oh yeah? You know me that well?”
“Yeah. I do.”
A chuckle escaped him. “You know, if you were anyone else, your head would be on a spike.”
“Yes, yes. You remind me often,” you teased.
Sukuna rolled his eyes but couldn’t hide his smile. “You should be lucky you have such a special place in my heart.”
Playfully, you poked his chest. “What can I say, you just can’t resist my charm!”
He took a step closer, and for a moment, the world around you faded. “Guilty,” he said with a mischievous glint, before sweeping you up into his arms, making you squeal with surprise. “I heard the flowers are blooming in the garden—a cacophony of colors. Let’s go check them out.”
“Hey! Put me down, Sukuna!” you laughed, trying to pinch his cheeks as he carried you toward the garden.
He leaned close to your ear, a grin forming. “Not a chance. You’re mine.”
As the two of you disappeared into the vibrant garden, your laughter echoed through the air. Sukuna, the fierce and feared king, had found his match—someone who could make him smile, laugh, and feel a love he’d never known before.
And as you basked in the warmth of the sun and the blooming flowers, you knew that despite his terrifying reputation, he was, and always would be, yours.
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tteotlma · 3 months ago
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Blurred Lines & Bright Screens
— movie night shenanigans turn into almost-kisses.
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(Wolverine/Reader) 2.3kw
a/n: i couldn’t find the right gif i was looking for — also i hope this makes sense ALSO i wanna write sm*t SO bad but all i can think abt rn is domestic/mutual pining/slow-burn HUGH JACKMAN
TW: mild sexual tension, implied violence, mentions of alcohol, snoring if u think it’s an ick.
Btw: i wrote this at work enjoy! also pls reblog so i can share my writing w more people !!!
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"I'm so glad you finally agreed to watch this movie with me!" You exclaim, giddy as you set a giant bowl of popcorn on the coffee table. Settling onto the plush velvet sofa, you rest your back against the armrest and pull your knees up, watching Logan trudge into the room.
"Well, it's only 'cause you kept buggin' me about it," he mumbles. Nonetheless, he plops his thick frame onto the sofa, the weight of his body causing your sock-covered feet to slide under his thigh.
You tense a little, giving him a quick glance before turning to the TV. He doesn't say anything, so you leave your feet under his warmth. Silence falls as you flip through the streaming apps.
"Um," you speak up, trying to cut the one-sided tension. You're pretty sure Logan is unfazed, but you want to be wrong. You mumble to yourself, filling the silence for your own comfort.
The room goes dark as the movie starts, and you try to settle in. Grabbing a giant blanket, you drape it over your legs, the fabric pooling where you touch Logan. You hope he might grab the blanket too, but he doesn't.
You scoff at the embarrassment creeping up your throat and try to focus on the movie. As you open your mouth to comment, Logan cuts you off.
"You don't gotta do that," he grumbles.
Sinking further into your seat, you bring your legs a little closer and grab the popcorn, attempting to pay attention to the screen. It works pretty well until you feel Logan shift beside you, and suddenly all you can think about is him.
You and Logan have been "friends" for about a year now, but have known each other for three. It took you two years to befriend the guy. Granted, your first year at the school was spent interning with Storm, and you were as timid as a mouse, always hiding behind her - especially when Logan came around.
It wasn't until the end of your first year that Storm felt confident enough in your abilities to loosen the lead. She began letting you go on missions with other people. At first, you avoided missions involving Logan; he was still too intense at times, and your self-confidence wasn't as strong as Storm's faith in you. But after a few big missions, you began to grow into yourself, and your confidence skyrocketed.
Missions evolved from involving handfuls of students and professors to solo projects as things got more serious. Then came one particular mission where Charles and the team felt it best that Logan accompany you. You protested right up until you left.
"Y/n," Charles stared at you intently as you stood by the door, Logan's footsteps thudding around the corner. "It's not that we think you aren't capable. We need your full focus on decoding the encrypted system."
"And I can-" You feel yourself getting fussy, as childish as it sounds. Scott grabs you by the shoulders, cutting you off mid-sentence, shocking you.
"Listen, Y/n," he sighs. "As much as you hate it, you're one of us now. The information you're going after is too valuable to risk doing it on your own. We need you to be one hundred percent focused on that, because once Sebastian Shaw realizes we're trying to get into his system, he will rain hellfire on whoever gets in his way. Logan is the only one who can be of service to you right now, so please." His voice softens as he begs. You see the worry sewn into his eyebrows and look at Charles, who is staring right back at you.
You sighed, just as Logan walked up behind Charles.
"Okay," you give a tight smile, and Scott taps his knuckle against your chin, trying to cheer you up. You let out an airy laugh and shove his hand away.
"You'll be fine," he tousles your hair before turning to look at Logan, who's staring intently at you both. Logan doesn't say anything and begins walking out the door.
"Professor," he grumbles as his figure fades into the dark of the night. Charles watches Logan walk off, then turns to you with a smirk on his face.
"Don't worry, everything will work out as it's supposed to." He gives you a wink, leaving you confused about his meaning.
"Uh, alright," you say, giving him a small nod as you head out following Logan.
After that mission, you and Logan became an oddly almost inseparable pair, which you deem as "friendship" even if he doesn't agree. Although you weren't glued to the hip, Logan was almost never far behind, and neither were you. Over the past couple of months, though, your relationship with Logan has evolved into something... complicated. There's an undeniable closeness between you, but it's hard to define. Sometimes, it feels like you're the little sister he never had - he's protective, gruff, and occasionally teases you mercilessly. Other times, there's a crackling tension in the air that makes you wonder if there's something more.
Like the time you were reaching for a book in the library, and Logan came up behind you to help. His chest brushed against your back as he grabbed it, and when you turned, you found yourself trapped between him and the bookshelf. For a moment, neither of you moved, your eyes locked, hearts racing. The air felt charged, and you could've sworn you saw something flicker in his eyes before he stepped back. You whispered a shy "thanks," avoiding eye contact by pretending to wipe dust off the book jacket. Logan straightened up, muttering "No problem, kid," as he walked away.
Or the time you were bantering in the garage while he worked on his bike. What started as playful teasing about him being demanding turned into something more when you challenged his ability to intimidate you anymore. He stood up slowly, moving close until you were almost nose to nose, growling softly, "Wanna bet?" The tension was palpable until Scott's voice broke the moment.
Then there's how you've fallen into these little routines without even realizing. Like how Logan always saves you a seat at briefings, or how you automatically grab two beers when heading to the kitchen after a long day. Or especially when, on every second and fourth Sunday morning of the month, both you and Logan have brunch (that's right) at this one diner that you insisted was to die for. It wasn't until Beast commented on your "domestic routine" that you both seemed to realize how couple-like you'd become.
And who could forget those late-night talks? Like the time you wandered into the kitchen at 2 AM, plagued by mission nightmares, only to find Logan there. What started as a few words of comfort turned into hours of conversation, sharing fears and hopes. As dawn broke, Logan squeezed your hand and said, "You're stronger than you think, kid." The look in his eyes made your heart skip a beat.
Moments like that leave you wondering if there's something more brewing between you and Logan, something beyond the boundaries of friendship or family. But neither of you has been brave enough to cross that line... yet.
You've tried to convince yourself it's nothing more than a close friendship, possibly a mentorship even. But there are moments - fleeting and intense - that make you question everything. You're stuck in this limbo, too afraid to push for more, yet unable to ignore the possibility that there might be something deeper brewing between you and Logan.
A guttural roar rips through the air, startling you out of your focus. Your head snaps towards Logan as another snore cuts through the silence. You don't know whether to laugh or look adoringly at the giant man sitting beside you.
He's sunken deeper into the sofa than when the movie first started. His arms are crossed over his chest, and his head lolls to the side, chin resting uncomfortably on his chest. His arms and head rise and fall with each breath, obviously so far gone at this point. You feel heat creeping up the back of your neck as you watch the usually stone-faced and stoic man sleeping beside you.
He's clad in comfortable clothes: black sweatpants, a zip-up hoodie, and his usual wifebeater clinging to his skin underneath. Your eyes focus on the bare skin that peeks out between the fabric of his sweater and the sleeve of the tank top. His hair is tousled and fluffier than usual, the air conditioning giving you occasional whiffs of peppermint and eucalyptus — his signature shampoo. The scent is never overwhelming, rather a subtle reminder of his presence.
You find yourself studying his face, softer now in sleep than you've ever seen it. The perpetual furrow between his brows has smoothed out, and his lips are slightly parted. Another snore rumbles through him, and you can't help but smile. It's rare to see Logan so unguarded, so... human.
A part of you wants to wake him, to tease him about falling asleep during your favorite movie. But a larger part revels in this moment of vulnerability, this glimpse of Logan that so few get to see. You wonder what he'd do if you gently brushed that stray lock of hair from his forehead, or if you repositioned yourself so you were closer.
The movie plays on, forgotten, as you lose yourself in contemplation of the man beside you. You're hyper-aware of every point where your bodies touch: your leg against his thigh, your arm brushing his as you shift slightly. The warmth of his body seems to seep into yours, and you find yourself leaning closer, drawn in by his presence even in sleep.
It's in quiet moments like these that the line between friendship and something more blurs dangerously. You know you should look away, should focus on the movie, but you can't bring yourself to break this spell. Instead, you allow yourself this stolen moment, committing every detail to memory, all the while wondering if Logan ever has moments like this about you. 
All of a sudden, Logan jolts and his head falls back against the headrest, another loud snore coming from his mouth and physically shaking your chest.
Alright, that's enough.
You shift closer to him while grabbing the pillow from behind your back and swing it towards his face. He instinctively grabs your wrist before you can make contact and pulls you in closer. He opens his eyes, staring at you threateningly as if asking "what the hell do you think you're doing," but when he realizes it's you, his gaze softens.
"What," he says, his voice deep with sleep. He unconsciously pulls you closer so your chest barely brushes against his shoulder.
"Get up, you're snoring and I can't hear the movie," you quip, trying not to let your voice falter - as if being this close to him had no effect on you whatsoever. Not like you were paying attention anyway. Logan sighs, lowering your hand from his face but not letting go of your wrist. Instead, he continues to hold it in his hand as he rests it on his stomach. Your hand tenses against the warmth of his body and - god, you hope he didn't feel that.
"Then turn it up louder," he says, closing his eyes and trying to make himself comfortable once again. You don't move. Instead, you... maybe... lean in closer? Logan doesn't notice.
"What, so you can yell at me for waking you up?" You give him a little nudge with your leg. "I don't think so."
Logan's eyes remain closed, but his grip on your wrist loosens, his thumb absently tracing circles on your skin. The gentle touch sends shivers up your arm.
"You woke me up anyway," he murmurs, his voice a low rumble that you feel more than hear.
You try to steady your breathing, very aware of how close you are. "Well, someone had to save you from choking on your own snores."
His lips quirk up in a half-smile. "My hero," he says dryly, finally opening his eyes to look at you.
The intensity of his gaze catches you off guard. There's something there, something beyond his usual gruffness. Your breath hitches as his eyes roam your face, lingering on your lips before meeting your eyes again.
"Logan," you whisper, not sure what you're asking for.
He shifts slightly, turning his body towards you. Your knees dig deeper into his hip and thigh, and he still hasn't let go of your wrist. With his free hand, he reaches up, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear. His fingers linger on your cheek, and you instinctively lean into his touch.
"Yeah?" he responds, his voice rough and low.
The air between you feels charged, electric. You're hyper-aware of every point of contact between you - his hand on your face, his fingers around your wrist, your legs pressed together. Your heart is pounding so hard you're sure he can hear it.
Logan leans in, slowly, giving you every opportunity to pull away. But you don't. You can't. You're frozen, caught between anticipation and disbelief. Is this really happening?
Just as his lips are about to brush yours, a loud explosion from the forgotten movie makes you both jump. The spell is broken. Logan pulls back, clearing his throat.
"We should, uh... finish the movie," he says, but he doesn't move away. His arm comes to rest on the back of the couch behind you, not quite touching but close enough that you can feel the heat radiating from him.
You nod, not trusting your voice. As you settle back to watch the film, you're hyper-aware of Logan beside you. The almost-kiss hangs in the air between you, unspoken but impossible to ignore. Every now and then, you catch him looking at you out of the corner of your eye, and you know that something has fundamentally shifted between you.
The movie plays on, but neither of you are really watching anymore. You're too busy wondering what might happen when the credits roll, and secretly hoping that maybe, just maybe, you'll get another chance to finish what you started.
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seungkwansphd · 1 year ago
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let me...
pairing: idol!seungcheol x gn!reader word count: 1.2k synopsis: you can tell that seungcheol is frustrated by his injury. if he would just let you...you'd be happy to help take his mind off of it. themes: SMUT, MDNI, squirmy/whiny scoups, oral sex (reader giving to seungcheol), explicit descriptions of oral sex, idol au, established relationship, comfort-ish?. (lmk if there are others to add)
a/n: my brain is fully rotted out these days. thanks @the-boy-meets-evil for instigating/encouraging this behavior🫶
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You snuck a glance at Seungcheol again and exhaled sharply. He had been in the wheelchair for nearly a week now and you were officially concerned. You imagined it would be tough for anyone to adjust to the change, but it seemed particularly challenging for him. He was, after all, the capable, strong, and self sufficient leader of Seventeen and despite his doctor’s orders, he seemed intent on refusing to ask for help.
“Hey! I said I would get things for you!” you yelled, concern rising as you watched Seungcheol try and fail to stand from the wheelchair.
“I can do it!” he insisted stubbornly, trying again.
Your hand shot out to his shoulder, pressing down as you rounded on him, pinning him with a stern look.
“It has not been that long since your surgery. If you tear something again I will truly kill you,” you narrowed your eyes at him menacingly. “Now what is it that you need?”
Seungcheol’s words died in his mouth as you turned from him to look at the cupboard. Even after months of dating you, the sight of your shape from behind never failed to drop his jaw. His brow furrowed. Yet another reminder of this godforsaken injury hindering him from the things he needed and wanted to do.
“Cheol? What was it you needed?” you turned your head to question again. His eyes shifted quickly back to the top shelf of the cupboard, but the hungry look in his eyes did not escape you.
“Tupperware from the top shelf. The blue one,” he answered.
“Okay,” you nodded, standing up on your toes, arching your back to reach for the item. You grinned as you did so, pushing your hips back towards your boyfriend because you could absolutely feel his eyes burning into you.
“Got it!” you chirped, letting yourself fall back into your heels and your ass to bounce gratuitously.
“This is killing me,” Seungcheol groaned, shifting in the wheelchair.
“Baby,” you turned to him with a simpering smile, “I know you hate asking for help, but what if you just let me…” you trailed off, tracing your fingertips up the brace on his leg.
Conflict played across Seungcheol’s brow as he considered your words. You knew it was tough for him to relinquish control, but you hoped he would so you could take his mind off of things, even if just for a while.
“Help me how?” he finally spoke, eyebrow raising expectantly.
You chuckled softly.
“You know I'm always good for you,” you smiled, tongue touching the corner of your lips playfully.
“Go ahead,” he nodded, giving his permission.
Your eyes lit up at him as you sank to your knees before him. You reached around the chair to lock the wheels before trailing your hands back over his hips and down his thighs.
He inhaled sharply and your pulse raced with pride. You leaned forward and started nuzzling your lips gently up the inside of his thigh. He squirmed as you drew closer and closer to the apex of his thighs. You were poked in the cheek by his tented erection when you finally arrived. Grinning at him, you nuzzled your cheek against him through the fabric of his sweatpants and Seungcheol was surprised at the way he reacted. Possessiveness and pride surged through him as you knelt between his legs, nuzzling his heavy cock eagerly.
“Someone’s eager,” you teased as you pushed the hem of his shirt up above his belly button. You kissed and lapped at the exposed skin above his waistband, knowing that this would drive him wild. The cool trail of your thin saliva set Seungcheol’s nerves alight and his hand found familiar purchase in your hair.
“Ah ah!” you shook your head, pulling his hand away. “I said…let me.”
Seungcheol’s eyes smoldered at you, but he gestured for you to continue.
“Good boy,” you teased and returned to the task at hand. Your hand stroked him over fabric as your lips continued their foray across his midsection. The feel and sound of him gasping and squirming underneath you was dizzying.
“YN, please,” he finally choked out. He felt ready to burst.
You hummed up at him before tugging at his waistband. He shifted his hips up, allowing you to pull it down around his thighs. You were mesmerized at the way his cock bounced when he sat back down, your eyes transfixed on the swollen, thick head.
In fact, many things about this moment were hypnotizing. The slight tension of elastic biting into Seungcheol’s thick thighs, the way the weight of his cock caused it to rest against his tummy, and the sturdiness of aforementioned midsection as the complimentary backdrop. After several moments of ogling, you literally had to shake your head to clear it of thoughts.
“You’re practically drooling,” he teased wryly, head cocked slightly as you regarded him. It was nothing short of a boost to the ego and he allowed himself to enjoy it. After a week of feeling frustrated and helpless, he let himself bask in your attraction and the power it made him feel.
“And?” you challenged him, lacing the fingers of one hand in his as the other grasped his thick cock eagerly at the base.
“Nothing,” he shook his head, eyes widening a hair as you started trailing kisses up his inner thigh.
At first through the fabric of his sweatpants and then on the bare skin of his upper thigh, Seungcheol was squirming by the time you closed your lips around his cock, sucking him hungrily into your mouth.
“Fuck,” he exhaled, voice breathy as he slouched slightly in the chair. You chuckled as you drew back up, lips stroking along the ridges and veins of his shaft. Seungcheol’s hands fisted as you began bobbing up and down, stroking him with your tongue.
“Feel good?” you asked when you came up for air. You nuzzled and nipped at his wet erection and he nodded.
“Fuck! Your mouth feels so good,” he let out a strangled groan as you shifted lower to suck on his balls. They were heavy and hot in your mouth as you sucked gently. You rolled them around on your tongue and were delightfully surprised at the whiny noise that Cheol let out. 
“Oh?” your eyebrows raised with delight. You licked a long, wet stripe up his length before swallowing him whole again, this time relaxing your throat to take him entirely.
Seungcheol let out another breathy whinge as you swallowed around the part of him that was lodged firmly in your throat. His whines grew louder and more frequent and you knew he wouldn’t last much longer. Pulling back, you fucked him with your mouth and throat as he panted your name desperately and repeatedly.
“Close,” he cupped your chin and warned you.
You nodded as well as you could with your mouth full and you reached down to cup his balls, tugging gently as you increased the suction with your mouth.
“Fuck! Shit. Fuck,” Seungcheol’s entire body tensed.
You watched with hungry eyes as his thick brows knit together and his eyes squeezed shut before he emptied himself into your ready and waiting mouth. You enjoyed the way his chest heaved with deep breaths until he came back down to earth and met your eyes.
“Thank you,” he pulled you up for a kiss. “Thank you, thank you. You always know what I need.”
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kurogane2512 · 4 months ago
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thoughts (and prayers) on pregnancy sex with any Mommy chars?
Hmmm I'll be honest pregnancy sex is not one of my favorites, which is why there isn't practically any content of it on my blog otherwise I have gotten such requests before and I keep putting them off. I don't hate it per say, I just can't get over the discomfort and potential pain it brings tho I know it can be very sweet and heartwarming. I tried to write it for now to see how it goes. If it does well then I'll make a pt 2 with other characters
NSFW AHEAD
Characters: La Signora, Ningguang, Cocolia, Himeko x gn!reader with a dick (separate)
La Signora/Rosalyne
Rosalyne never imagined she'd experience this side of life after her fate changed drastically. She had given up on the hope long ago, but she was ever grateful to you for bringing it back and making it a reality. Somehow, her libido increases a lot for a few months. The times where she imagines having the perfect little family life with you makes her emotional and needy, it's like she wants more and more.
It doesn't help how caring and attentive you are to her; taking time off work and tending to her every need, bringing her every little thing she wants and taking care of her cravings. No wonder she craves you in another way too. She lays comfortably on her back, relaxed and without worries while you are between her legs eating her out.
Her moans are more restrained than normal but nevertheless sweet, her belly rises as she feels your tongue probe her inside and pleasure her everywhere she wants. She looks down and barely sees your head, constrained by her own belly that's housing the love you made together. She tries to reach over and hold your head to push you deeper but it's proving difficult.
"Mhm....m-my love.... more.... deeper~"
And you immediately abide as you gently lift her legs slightly, ensuring she doesn't feel uncomfortable, then plunge your tongue deeper and fuck her. She gasps a breathy moan and almost arches up before enclosing her thighs around your head and keeping you in place.
"Cumming.... oh, my love.... I feel so good.... there.... aahn— please give me more!~"
She releases on your mouth and you drink up all her sweet essence then lay beside her, holding her close in an embrace. She feels so loved and grateful having you, her doubts about motherhood fade when she sees you and knows you are always there for her. She was called a witch, a monster, and a cruel Harbinger by the world. But being called a wife and mother was what she truly desired.
Ningguang
Being the ever busy Tianquan meant breaks were seldom found. Of course, Liyue had maternity leave and Ningguang had many capable people to take over her work but it was difficult for her to give up everything instantly. She'd still go to her office for meetings and paperwork despite how much her secretaries requested otherwise; in the end, they'd have to call you to pick up your wife and make her rest.
What was more appalling was that sometimes you'd catch her looking over paperwork even while inside the room. She'd brush it off saying she's resting and it's just some papers, but you knew she's pushing herself. The only way to make her listen now was to throw away the papers and kiss her passionately before gently laying her down. Her breath would falter seeing you above and feeling you kiss her neck.
And then the moment she'd feel your finger brush her slit, her breath hitching and legs squeezing around your hand. You'd kiss her legs and pry them open before you unzip your pants and bring out your erect shaft. She instantly pools looking at your throbbing cock, and the next moment you begin pushing in ever so gently and slowly she feels heavenly. You nestle inside her till she's comfortable and gaze at her belly carrying your love, and you can't help but reach down to caress it and plant kisses on it.
Your thrusts are slow and tender, ensuring her pleasure and comfort over your own. You honestly feel good just having her here and being inside her, and her walls clench you tighter than normal anyways. She tries to wrap her legs around your waist but you stop her and instead, hold them up for her as she likes. She wants to feel closer to you, she stretches her arms out and you smile at her before leaning down to kiss her lips. You release inside her after she cums then lay beside her and hold her close, she snuggles into you and forgets all her duties and worries.
"My dear, would I really make a good mother? I can't help but feel I'd neglect out child due to my duties and—"
"Ning, we have talked about this before. I fully trust you, I know you will be a great mother. You are practically Liyue's mother and you take care of it so well, I know you will treat your own even better. Don't worry, I'm here to ensure we both do good."
Ningguang smiles and feels her heart fasten then pecks your lips and embraces you, promising to you and herself that she won't let you down and will give the best life to your child.
Cocolia
The Supreme Guardian already adopted a daughter before so she's quite apprised with parenthood but she knows she could do better. The feeling of having her own child is different, she's not going to mistreat Bronya at all from now on but she can't deny the doting feelings rising inside her day by day as she watches her belly grow. In the early months she still goes to her office and does her work as usual, despite protests from you and Bronya.
She knows Bronya is ready to take over, but it's hard to change so easily when disaster is constantly looming. She looks forward to your visits during this time, knowing that you'll be bringing her lunch and tending to her needs. She intentionally acts slightly needier than usual, just to have you spoil and dote on her. That's how she found herself sitting on your lap currently with her back pressed to your chest and your hands slipped inside the thigh window on her dress and caressing her skin.
"Mmm..... Y-Y/n, not here.... a-anyone could come in— aaahn~"
You chuckle and kiss her neck in response while your hand dips even further below. Cocolia bites her lip to conceal her voice but she's caught off guard when you pull her face to the side and kiss her lips while one hand is rubbing her panties and the other lightly pinching her breasts. Cocolia moans into the kiss as she feels your fingers dig into her slit, automatically resting her body on yours and giving control.
"Just relax, Madam Cocolia. Didn't you want to be spoiled?~" you whisper in her ear and she soon feels your fingers inside her, gently rubbing and grinding her walls. Her head falls back on your shoulder and you keep making more kisses on her neck this way, while your other hand is caressing her belly now. The situation is dangerously erotic, doing it in her office was always risky but you knew she loved it. You gaze at her belly and just think about the child she's carrying, your fingers rubbing faster now to chase her high.
Yet, you were still gentle and attentive to her state. You made sure she felt comfortable throughout and gave her breaks to stabilise her breathing. She also feels your erection rub against her ass continuously and starts grinding on it, seeking any friction. That's your cue to make her cum soon and you do just that, holding her in your arms as her cum drips on your pants making a mess.
Himeko
When she accepted you on the Astral Express, she certainly didn't think she'd be carrying your child one day. You two are so friendly and relaxed around each other that people around you often forgot you are married, but of course they are reminded by Himeko's growing belly. Himeko had her qualms about parenthood at first, mainly insecurity about raising a child on the Express that continuously moved across the cosmos. Pom-Pom had suggested to drop her back to her home planet but she wasn't ready to stop the journey yet.
Himeko would have not accepted this had you not assured her that you will ensure the child gets the best life on the express; and of course, the other members were also extremely supportive and preparing for the moment. Himeko can't help but feel so much love for you deep inside. Whenever you come to visit her in her room to ask if she needs anything, she's always lost looking at you and gives simple answers to your questions.
She makes you stay with her until dinner, both of you just lying on the bed together as you keep your head on her belly and comfortably listen to your baby's sounds. She caresses your head during this, gazing at you lovingly. You plant a kiss on her belly then lean up to cup her face and kiss her as well, the kiss ends up turning passionate most of the time due to her high libido and soon after she's straddling your lap while your lips are locked.
She feels your bulge press into her and unzips your pants to take out your shaft, she's already prepared enough to take you in. You help her as she takes in your cock, sitting on your lap while it penetrates her deeply. Her arms wrap around your neck while yours around her waist, you hold each other like Koalas as she begins to thrust up and down.
"Ngh.... d-darling.... aah~ Please.... give it to me.... mmh!~"
Himeko's breathy moans are heavenly in this state as they ring right in your ear. You hold her well enough and help her thrust, eventually bucking your own hips into her and letting her simply take it. Her head falls on your shoulder when she's tired but you ensure she doesn't feel deprived, your hips keep moving up and down or back n forth to make her feel it where she wants since this was for her pleasure.
She hugs you tightly and bites down your neck when she feels your cock throb and release a stream of hot cum inside, her head shooting back for a moment feeling it fill her up. She thanks you by kissing you passionately again and tries to convey she wants to do more, but the knocking on the door calling you both for dinner makes her pout and wait a little longer.
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bestreadfanfic · 3 days ago
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Landscapes
Summary: Johnny and Simon are both done with their military service and now live in the English countryside. However, Johnny's time in the military left him disabled and with a lot of unresolved issues. You and your boyfriend moved into their sleepy town and Johnny just knows you need saving.
Pairings: Ghoap x reader
Warnings: Domestic abuse, Soap has PTSD, Violence
A/N: So, I was supposed to writing part two on my other story, but I got writer's block. This just popped up in my head.
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Johnny wasn’t a creep. Majority of people that came across him would describe him as a good guy that's just a bit intense. In fact, Johnny was such a good person that he risked and was willing to sacrifice his life for his country. While his time in the military didn’t kill him, although sometimes he wished it did, he did lose a leg and got some brain damage. The point is that Johnny sacrificed enough to indulge himself once in a while.
It’s not like he was causing you any harm. No, he was just keeping an eye on you. Despite the fact that he’s only ever really seen you from afar and never even spoke to you he felt this overwhelming protectiveness over you. He knew that your boyfriend was no good. 
Boyfriend
Not your husband. Neither of you two wore a ring. Not to mention that when the two of you moved into the small house down the road and Johnny and Simon went to introduce themselves he very pointedly said that his girlfriend lives with him as well. Johnny didn’t have the chance to speak to you then. It’s not like he really wanted anyway. 
Your boyfriend wasn’t a very pleasant person to be around. It only worsened when he found out that Johnny and Simon were in a relationship. Johnny figured that only a woman that was as unpleasant as him was able to put up with. But they say that opposite attracts. 
It was nearly a month after meeting your boyfriend that Johnny finally saw you. In that month Johnny had plenty of interactions with your boyfriend. None of them that Johnny enjoyed. 
Every morning Johnny would go for a walk. At first Simon would walk with him, but Johnny needed to go alone. It’s not that he didn’t love Simon. He did with all his heart. But he needed the freedom. Needed to prove that he was capable. Even if that meant going for a walk by himself.  
Johnny knew that the only reason Simon allowed him to go on these walks was because they lived in the British countryside. Crime rarely ever happened in their small town. Johnny also knew that despite being in such a safe town Simon would follow him on these little walks. Of course when he first figured this out he was furious, but Johnny had lost the will to fight over most things. He needed these walks for his sanity. If the price to pay was having Simon follow him from afar he would gladly take it. Besides he sacrificed way bigger things before.  
He often zoned out of these walks. That’s probably why he didn’t notice you at first. It was your sobs that brought him out of his daydreams. You were sitting on the side of the road in front of your house just bawling your eyes out. It took him a while to register that you were that asshole’s girlfriend. 
By the time that his foot started to move towards you the front door to your house swung open. The loud noise caused him to stop in his tracks. He hated loud noises now. It caused him to freeze and retreat back inside of his head. His comfort space. He could still see and hear what’s going on around him. He just couldn’t process it. 
He saw your boyfriend stomping outside of the house right up to the two of you. He heard your boyfriend yelling at you and then at him. But he couldn’t understand the words that were spewing out of his mouth. He couldn’t move his foot. His crutches seemed to be buried into the ground keeping him glued to the spot. He wanted to move so bad. Or at least tell him to stop. But he couldn’t. 
His unresponsiveness only seemed to make your boyfriend madder. So mad that he came up to Johnny chest to chest. Johnny was taller but he was in no shape to fight. When your boyfriend lightly shoved Johnny's chest he toppled over like a domino. 
Although that only served further paralyzed Johnny it put you into motion. You put yourself in between Johnny and your boyfriend begging. Johnny couldn't understand what you were saying but did understand that you were attempting to defend him. 
It wasn’t needed however, because in the next 30 seconds your boyfriend was flat on the ground with Simon on top of him pounding his face in. You knew better than to get in between Simon and your boyfriend so you just stood to the side begging him to stop. 
Simon turned his head toward you and for a second Johnny was sure that you were next. But he knew that Simon wasn’t one to hit women. Instead you and Simon exchange a few words. Johnny didn’t understand he could see your mouth move and hear the words, but his brain refused to translate the words.  
Johnny groaned in frustration causing the two of you to snap your heads towards him. The rest was a blur. When Johnny came again he was in his bed. The whole ordeal was a mess but Johnny came out of it with a strange fascination with you. 
He was more aware of you. For someone that he’s never seen around before you seemed to be in a lot of places. He never approached you though. Simon had warned him to avoid both you and your boyfriend at all costs. 
However, Simon never said anything about watching you. It’s not like he was stalking you. No, it just so happens that the two of you rarely had anywhere to go and often enjoyed taking walks through the English countryside.
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inmyheaddd · 4 months ago
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homesick for you - grayson hawthorne x reader
wc: 1.1k warnings: fluffy, sliiightly suggestive at the end? taglist: @thecircularlibrary @whatsamongus @heartwithsimplenotes @x-liv25-jamieswife @wish-i-were-heather (if you want to be added let me know!) masterlist
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after a long, hectic week of press and work, grayson finally had a day off. a day just for you two. when he laughed about finally getting some real sleep the night before, you weren’t expecting him to get up at 5 in the morning.
after reaching for him in bed, only to be met with a cold spot on the bed where he should’ve been, you made your way down to the kitchen, wearing grayson’s shirt. 
his hair was wet, and he was still wearing his swimming shorts, fixing himself a cup of coffee. it was 7:30 now, and he’s already swam? he turned, slightly shocked to see you, then smiled softly. “hi sweetheart, what are you doing up?”
you rubbed your eyes as you walked over to him, hugging him from behind. “hey, i thought we were sleeping in today?”   
he felt a slight pang of guilt as he spoke, “i woke up and couldn’t go back to sleep, i was just about to make my way back to bed. i’m sorry, my love.” grayson turned and kissed the top of your head, then continued making his coffee, fixing you a cup as well. 
“you don’t have to be sorry,” you chuckled sleepily, “you’re just… so productive.” you paused before continuing, “ugh, i hate you.” you muttered into his back.  
now grayson was the one chuckling, “i love you too, princess.”
you retracted your arms back to your side and walked over to grayson’s side, leaning your back against the counter, then moving up to sit on top of it.
you couldn’t help the way your gaze found his face, trailing down to his bare chest, his torso, his hands, his arms. you had a huge staring problem when it came to him.   
when you finally looked back up at his eyes, he was already looking at you with raised eyebrows and a small grin, and he had put a pause on making breakfast, his hands still.   
“are you alright there?” he asked teasingly.  it wasn’t fair, the way he always made you feel so flustered. even other times when he would be the one staring at you, you’d be the one flushed, not him. how is that possible?  
you rolled your eyes jokingly, “perfectly fine, thank you." and he leaned in as he laughed, placing a kiss on your cheek and muttering a small “i love you,” before he did so.   
you smiled at him, your cheeks a flushed shade of pink. 5 minutes later you were swinging your legs back and forth as you sat on the counter, slightly zoned out on a random spot across the room. you were honestly exhausted, trying your hardest to hide it from grayson.  
of course, grayson being grayson, noticed.   
he was in the middle of cutting your avocados when he noticed your unfocused eyes looking behind him, and he turned his head confusedly to see what you were looking at.  
this snapped you out, and you sat up straight, realizing that you had previously been slightly slouched. “oh, sorry. i just spaced out.”  
grayson nodded as he placed a gentle hand behind your back, tracing patterns with his fingers, “it's no problem. let’s go back to bed, yeah?”  
“what? no, no.” you shook your head, “i’m barely even tired anymore.”   
grayson could’ve ran a marathon right then and there; he wasn’t tired at all. the way he put you above everything made you want to kiss him all over, and also slap him because you believe he deserves more.   
grayson didn’t even think twice before pushing the food to the side. and before you knew it, he was gently lifting you off the counter.  
“grayson! put me down!” you protested as he began walking you two back to the room, “i’m perfectly capable of walking myself!”   
all he replied with was, “i know,” along with a faint smile on his face, as he continued walking.  
by the time you two were back in your room, you were half asleep and giggling like crazy. grayson wasn’t too sure what exactly you were laughing at, but he was laughing too. 
 
he got changed into sweatpants, which hung dangerously low at his waist. you quickly averted your gaze as he walked out the bathroom, as if you hadn’t been together for ages now.   
your head was laying on grayson’s chest; the gentle grip he had on your waist was more comfort than a blanket could ever give. 
“there’s a really cute cafe that opened up a few minutes away, and guess what?” you mumbled into his chest as he toyed with your hair.
“what?” grayson asked.  
“it’s right next to that boutique we really love, the one we got the matching clothes from.” a small smile found your face at the memory.
“why don’t we go later today? 2 birds, one stone,” he suggested with a slight hum at the end of his question.  
“i thought your whole hawthorne thing was twelve birds, one stone?” you recalled. 
a chuckle escaped his lips, “you're right, we can go to 10 other stores you love, then.” 
you tilted your head up to meet his eyes, a playful smile on your face. “i mean, my plan was to drag you to 10 other stores, regardless. but hey, if you’re the one suggesting it…
grayson laughed again, something he didn’t do often with anyone but you. “you wouldn’t have to drag me, i love shopping with you — besides, who else would honestly tell me if something looks right?”
“true,” you nodded while closing your eyes, “your personal style is kind of horrible, atleast you have me to help though!” you quipped sarcastically. on a real note, grayson had better style than basically any male you’d ever met.
he let out a small chuckle through his nose and stopped stroking your hair, and kissed the top of your head, “you know, you manage to make the things i used to hate the most favorable times, simply by being there. you could drag me to the pits of the earth and i’d only be thinking about how to make you the happiest you can possibly be.”
his voice was devoid of any joking tone it had earlier, it caught you so off guard. it was a total 180 from the laughing mood you were just in. 
“grayson,” you almost whispered as you got up, propping yourself up on your elbows.   
“it’s just the truth, sweetheart.” he stated as he noticed the way you were looking at him, almost in awe. he didn’t believe he deserved it— deserved you.   
“i love you, so much.” you breathed out as you leaned in to kiss him, slow and passionate, but saying all the words you couldn’t quite form. he flipped you two over, grayson now towering on top of you.  
his lips chased yours as you pulled back,  then he rested his forehead against yours. “you have absolutely no idea how much i love you, how inlove i am with everything about you.” he said breathlessly.  
a smile found your face and you tilted your head back to see your boyfriend's face fully, taking a deep breath in. “why don’t you enlighten me, then?” you suggested jokingly.   
“oh i will,” his lips twitched upwards, “and i have all day to do so.”   
those were the last words he said before peppering your neck with featherlight kisses, leaving you a laughing mess.   
you could always go to that cafe another day, right?
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hoseoksluna · 7 months ago
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VAPOR, pt II. | jjk ft. myg
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pairing: boyfriend!jungkook x steam!oc 
genre: smut, a great dose of angst
word count: 11.9k
summary: hard times ask for extra care and like the healer he is, jungkook doesn't fail to give you his absolute best.
pinterest board: vapor | playlist: vapor
warnings: heartbreak, lots of tears, oral sex (f. and m. receiving), praise kink, sucking fingers, female masturbation, fingering, oc is extremely wet and jk is rly rly hard for her <3, squirting, multiple orgasms, jk tells her off kinda and it's hot, pet names, raw and rough sex, the abandonment issues are heavy in one part, mention of a sex toy
note: hi, my loves. this was absolutely painful to write, but i know i made a good decision. unfortunately for those who are waiting for the next series—i'm sorry, but this will have another part. it's already so long and if i kept going, it'd have probably like 20k plus words and i don't want to take up your time. i think i can manage to post the last part THIS week, so look forward to this. one part of the happy ending done. <3 i love you, guys, i hope you like this. don't hesitate to let me know; i worked hard and i want validation skfjslkfjsklfs. enjoy, my loves. <3
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A dead man for the fifth time, Jungkook finds the unfolding of the events quite ridiculous now. And he’s not surprised, how could he really be at this point, that there’s radio silence within the chambers of his heart. 
The food court is muted, the lights are ever still bright, but the corners of his eyes gain peculiar shadows that cling to the side of your face as you swirl your spoon in your hot soup. His phone is ringing and its obnoxious sound is but a vibration in his hand and the only thing that’s delaying him from sliding his thumb across his device is some sort of consent in your solemn, yet saddened features. He can see translucent threads lining your rounded lips that have sown your mouth shut, preventing you from speaking out your tender heart and it’s predominantly this thing, among the obvious other ones, that drives him to make a scene in front of all of these people crowded around him. 
If he has to, he will rip those wisps. Make it as painless as possible because whether he likes it or not, he needs you right now. Needs your word of advice, needs your consent in order to do what the entirety of his organs yearns to do. And if you say no, he’ll willingly turn his phone off and refuse to speak to his once-closest friend. 
Just for the sake of your mental health. Just to outrun fate and grasp her wrist to stop her from furthermore scarring your heart. 
You have enough of them and he has only one pair of lips to heal them. 
Lifting the spoon to your mouth, you keep your gaze on its silver coat and it unnerves him—the fact you won’t look at him, the fact that you so evidently don’t want to be in this situation. Your own boyfriend is chasing you around town, even though he transmitted waves of nothingness your way when he had you under his roof. He doesn’t fucking understand it. Doesn’t understand how he’s capable of doing such a thing and fury rises in his gut, soars high to his throat, which constricts around it so tightly that it forbids him from inhaling any oxygen into his lungs. And he fears that if he speaks, it’ll soak you. Make you even smaller than you are and he’ll hate himself for the rest of his life for it. 
However… 
He needs to talk to you. Time is pressing down on his shoulders once again and here and now, he’s too burdened, too fragile to bear it. His stoicism has long been fractured, its shards cracking cacophonously under the soles of his sneakers and… the singular tear rooting on his pale cheek hasn’t even dried up. 
“Tell me what to do, sweetheart,” Jungkook says, his voice a soft, deep murmur; a plea. His surroundings gain volume, little by little, the lack of air in his lungs causing his mind to spin. His body grows cold and, unwittingly, he bounces his leg underneath the table. “If you don’t want me to pick up this call, I won’t. It’s your decision.” 
He knows that whatever it is that will come out of your mouth and change the trajectory of his fury, he’ll protect you nonetheless. No matter what, no matter what it takes. He’ll unleash what’s been swarming in him for a long time in private sometime later if you ask for it—he’ll gladly tell his organs no and they’ll have to listen. That’s certainly not an issue. 
What will be an issue is if you remain quiet. He doesn’t know what will happen to him under that circumstance. He has very little trust in something that’s out of his grasp and he has  strong disliking for the looseness of it all. Doesn’t feel right. 
A quick, soft slurp of your soup. A lift of your weary eyes. A kick in his heart. “I don’t want to make any decision. If you want to pick up the call, you should. I don’t mind. If you don’t, that’s fine, too.” 
He must be dead because he’s staring at his own reincarnation. 
You’ve walked so far on your pathway of suffering that you reached the point that you don’t care anymore. Don’t care that there’s a risk Yoongi will see you or hear you. Don’t care about what’s going to happen when he does and about the events after. It’s as admirable as it is disturbing and a faint pulse begins to sound in his chest. Thrill nips at his skin; a sense of responsibility uncoiling within, linking to the surety of his instinct to protect you. To stand up for you. To make things right in a way, way different manner than he’s ever tried before and it’s those inclinations that drive his thumb to swipe across the screen. 
Though he doesn’t look at Yoongi. No, he looks at you, studying your features. It’s not that he doesn’t trust your words, he does and vehemently so, but this is a difficult situation that you’re both in and it would be only understandable if the gravity of it washed over you all of a sudden and you weren’t comfortable with this anymore. He wouldn’t hesitate to end the call right away. Fuck what Yoongi thinks. 
But nothing changes about your weariness. It’s a still pool of water, unmoving and utterly impenetrable, like the pond behind his cabin during cold, winter times. When this is over, he promises to get warm and dip his fingers in, permeate your skin with rosiness and coziness. Stall the change of seasons unfurling in you. 
And Jungkook pleats that promise into the palm of your hand as he takes it, his thumb against your head line. Watches you stuff your mouth full with noodles. His own stomach churns, the fury half parting, making a way for his hunger to suffuse his senses. He’s so happy you’re eating that all he can think about is how he’s going to make your life better with this one singular video call. 
He leaves you to it and focuses his gaze down on Yoongi. His once-close friend is driving in his car and despite the shit view he has of him, due to his service and the way Yoongi’s phone is angled, he can still see the way he’s swathed by murkiness. The purple marks under his eyes are a stark contrast to the pallidness of his skin and his hair is a mess, tufts of black strands sticking in different directions as if he had been on the verge of ripping his hair out. He has one hand on the steering wheel, while the other runs over his upper lip. Over and over, back and forth, waiting, patiently, for Jungkook’s attention. 
He starts speaking once he knows he has it. 
“Sorry to bother you, I didn’t know who else to call.” He sighs and explains that he’s calling because of you, the mention of your name causing his voice to crack. “I drove up to her apartment, but she’s not there. She told me she was going to her place when she… when she… left.” 
So he heard you loud and clear, and yet he didn’t have the decency to respond to you, make you know that you were heard. Jungkook looks at you and this time you look back at him, too. A tight, painful exchange of glances. He squeezes your hand, even as Yoongi continues. 
“She’s not picking up the phone. I’m worried about her—”
Jungkook is swift with his words. “You should’ve thought of that before you let her leave,” he snaps, his whole body tense, hanging yet again by the thread. He keeps his hold over your hand gentle, despite it all—despite the fact that his form yearns to explode. “You’re too reckless. Leave her alone.” 
Your eyes widen while Yoongi’s narrow, but he doesn’t regret what he said. He knows there’s utmost truth in them, something that should scramble his brain until he comprehends it. Yoongi’s mouth purses in a tight line and his fist clenches before he places it on the steering wheel with a thud. 
“Don’t talk to me like this. I don’t need this,” Yoongi mutters, pulling out his hyung card and while it angers Jungkook even more, he also thinks that’s the biggest load of bullshit that has ever come out of his mouth. “I need to know where she is.” 
He gazes intently at you as he says, “It’s none of your business.” 
And those big eyes of yours round in a good emotion that he can’t really recognize and slowly, you swallow down your noodles. Speechless, he deduces. A tendril of adrenaline courses in him, strengthening his responsibility and protectiveness over you, kissing it ever so sweetly when you squeeze his hand. 
A validation. 
Jungkook could stay like this. He wouldn’t mind at all—it feels too nice. Feels like you’re his. And perhaps at this very moment you are. 
The feeling is so overwhelming that he doesn’t give two shits about the fact Yoongi is detonating on the other side of the screen. He keeps his eyes on you. 
“What the fuck do you mean it’s none of my business? Is she with you?” 
It’s at this moment that a proud smile curls Jungkook’s lips. And it’s joy that absorbs his organs, his heart beating loudly and clearly. Even the people around him seem happier in his peripheral vision. He thinks this night tops in the best days he’s ever had. 
Tension has grabbed a hold of you, too. But he will make it better. He’s got you. 
He continues with the truth and he’s not afraid of it. Not at all. 
“Yes, she’s safe with me.” 
Those words, most peculiarly, soothe Yoongi’s rage. Silence fills his car, one that forces Jungkook to flick his eyes to his phone because he truly can’t believe what’s happening. Yoongi runs his hand down his face and nods once, the murkiness loosening a fair bit before it pulps him. It’s now that he becomes small. A tiny boy, at the hands of his own repercussions. Displeased, but relieved. A strange, strange sight.
“Good,” Yoongi says and Jungkook’s stomach drops. “She should be with you. You’re better than me in ways I could never be. She doesn’t need me anymore.” 
Your mouth parts and a vexation of your own clutches you. Enough for you to drop your spoon and lift your hand, palm up. The adrenaline in Jungkook’s system thickens. “Give me the phone.” 
Yoongi's head turns to the screen at the sound of your irritated voice and Jungkook’s smile widens, handing you the device. He knows what you’re about to say will put an end to this difficult situation and he’s eager to hear it, eager for it to happen. 
“Careful, don’t make him crash his car,” Jungkook whispers, ever so smug, just for your ears, but on the other hand, he doesn’t care if it finds a way to your boyfriend’s as well. You gaze at him most solemnly, fleetingly, and he can’t read shit in your expression. He’s not troubled by it, however; he wants you to let loose in whatever form of your choosing, of your liking. You deserve it, to be boundless like that. It’s been a long time coming.
His phone in your hand is too large and he finds it so cute that it helps him relax. Without withdrawing his hand, he hunches over his soup, getting his utensils ready. 
And his first taste of his meal is as good as the first words you hurl at Yoongi. 
“Are you joking right now? Is that all you have to say after everything? You’re actually unbelievable,” you spit, shooting daggers at the screen, your brows furrowed, a lethal glare directed at him. Yoongi doesn’t say anything, but he hears him sigh. “I’d like you to know that it’s my decision that I’m with him. Not yours. You’re not in control of it and you never will be again. I’m with him because I want to be with him, not because you let me be with him or because you think it’s good.” 
Your voice rises in volume ever so slightly, respectful of your surroundings, but untethering your heart free nonetheless. A tortured pain coats it, despite the fact you’re holding yourself strong and it drives Jungkook to let go of his spoon, unable to eat when he feels your agony in all its raw immensity. You struck his awe and all he can do is watch you make order of your life. For your sake and also, most remarkably, for his. A beautiful, beautiful sight.
Love unable to be real turning away, slowly, from the dead end. 
“So, we’re over?” Yoongi asks, small—small voice. Jungkook has never heard it before and butterflies zap his stomach with the strongest electricity they could come across. 
Your face doesn’t change and you don’t hesitate to unleash your next words. “I think you should go see other people and heal from this mess. You’ve grown too attached to your own fucked up impressions and you need a reality check.” 
Such coldness, such brutality. Jungkook can’t breathe—finds it hard to believe this is happening right now, that angels are by his side, keeping his bloodstream flowing. He feels as though he’s dreaming again due to the speck of vagueness in your answer. Yes, you’ve told him to go see other people, but he’s also aware that Yoongi needs the raw truth on a silver platter. If there’s anything he hates with all his being, it’s the abyss of obscurities. It’s the space in his brain for him to make up for the emptiness of your words. 
Jungkook intertwines his fingers with yours, his thumb fondling the crook between your thumb and your forefinger, giving you the little strength he possesses in him—the last of it, all he has. 
Are you breaking up with him or are you taking a break? 
Jungkook longs to know, perhaps he needs it, too, even though both options are more than merciful for such a wretched dreamer like him. A dreamer that has stumbled upon gold in a poor, poor world. 
“Honey, please.” Yoongi breaks into sobs and it’s now, now as Jungkook hears the sound of a raw emotion from such a detached person that he softens, his fury snuffed out in a blink of an eye, and he can’t feel his arms, nor his legs. He realizes, most strangely, that it’s his friend, one he spent the last ten years of his life with. The aftertaste of copper pools in his mouth again and his own eyes wet. Yours, too, your chin quivering the more you take in his devastated state. “I can’t do this without you. I–I don’t know how to.” 
Despite your tenderness, your words remain firm. “I think you’ve managed quite well these past few days. You’ve pushed me away, needed space. So go have it. I won’t suffer through it, though. I’ll do what I want, you should, too. You need to heal in the only way you know how. Alone.” 
Yoongi sniffles, taking long breaths to seemingly calm his shuddering lungs. And pity enfolds his heart, pity for his friend that he’s become such a wreck and that he’s a witness to it, more than the cause behind it. He puts the latter to the side, now is not the right time for it. 
He knows what will happen to him once he breaks the dam of self-blame. It’s not what you need right now and he will make sure to keep that dam of your own safe and stable. It’s his duty. 
“Will you wait for me?” Yoongi asks and Jungkook feels that question curl around his gut. With a light layer of sadness, he returns to his food, his stomach grumbling. 
You sigh, swiping your fingers under the skin beneath your lower lashes, perhaps so Yoongi doesn’t see your weakness. Jungkook watches you as he slurps on his noodles, nervous—terribly, terribly nervous. 
“I don’t know if I’m able to trust you like that again,” you conclude, taking a big breath and Jungkook chokes on his food, coughing so hard that you untangle your hand from his and slap his back. “Gotta go. I’ll call you later.” You end the phone call and gently lay down his phone, rubbing his back soothingly as Jungkook splutters. “Are you okay? What happened?”
What happened? You gave him life. Made a pathway for his dreams to come true. Gave him a leeway to walk upon this earth with no weight on his shoulders. Turned something inaccessible accessible. 
Love unreal becomes real, running headlong in the opposite direction of the dead end. 
The last of his aching coughs emit out of his throat and he swallows, lungs heaving with freedom and easy, easy breaths. The air is different, the oxygen much sweeter. You put his tall glass of water into his hand, encouraging him to drink, never letting go of him as Jungkook takes a big sip, the cold liquid washing away all of those dark ashes left from the fire of his fury. His vision blurs once he looks at you in this new, shifted reality and there’s a smile to his face, calmness surging through his body, exhilaration most needed twining around it. 
“You tell me,” Jungkook says, almost out of breath—out of his mind. “What just happened?” 
You go back to your soup, squeeze your fried egg open with your chopsticks. “I’m not letting him hurt me again. I don’t have to be strong and take it, do I?” With the yolk spilling in, you push the entirety of the egg white into your mouth, huffing in delight, rolling your eyes back and chewing, cheeks puffed up like a little squirrel. His own utensils go slack in his hand, watching you enjoy your food, his heart enlarging. But then you furrow your brows and stop chewing. “Fuck, it’s cold, but it’s so good.” You sigh and resume chewing, your eyes flicking across the table, your body bouncing excitedly in your seat. You act as though you didn’t just break your own boyfriend’s heart—as if you led a normal conversation with him, in which he was just checking up with you. Jungkook’s awe is so struck that he can’t speak. Can’t eat. Can’t do anything but watch you with all that love abounding in his being for you. And then you flick your eyes to his and the wrinkle between your brows deepens. “Why aren’t you eating? Is it too cold?” 
He calls your name, firmly. Leans back in his seat with a big sigh. Rubs his eyes with his fingers. “What just happened?” 
There’s simply no way this is real. 
You devour your noodles, swallowing spoonfuls of soup. “I ended things with him, Jungkook, and I’m not coming back to him.” 
His mouth dries, heart picks up speed. How are you saying this with such ease? Isn’t your heart split in two? Your devotion clung to his guy with every breath you took and back at his cabin, you wouldn’t let him play with you unless Yoongi was present. How come it seems like you’re anything but heartbroken right now? 
“Are you okay?” Jungkook asks in all honesty, confounded by your behavior. 
You push away your bowl, cradling your full belly. “Yes, I’m okay.” 
He doesn’t really believe you. Losing your appetite was proof enough. “Positive?” 
You look over to the side and your chin begins to quiver. There it is. Your hand flies to your face and you hide the rupture of your pretense behind it. The corners of your face, the only parts he gets to see, flush in red and Jungkook grabs your things with a heavy, sinking heart. Walks over to you and gives you his hand. 
“Let’s go home, sweetheart.” 
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The weeping clouds have migrated not just to your eyes but to his, too. The night is deep and Jungkook feels it, ardently, coming to rest beneath his skin, floating on its back upon the stream of his tears that he’s stifling. He’s holding your hand and your purse as he’s leading you to his place. You didn’t want to see the face of your apartment. As a matter of fact, you couldn’t stand anything that reminded you of Yoongi and you begged him to take you somewhere you’ve never been before. Jungkook only nodded, brushing away the tears that managed to escape. Thought he’d bring you to any place you’d ever ask, just as long as you stuck with him. 
He’s gained what he wanted for a long time, but at what cost? The two people he loves the most are broken. One, his dearest, he’s grasping tightly so she wouldn’t fly away. The other is becoming but a memory, ten years going down the drain—never to be seen again, never to be continued. 
He has you, but he lost Yoongi. And the realization hangs, heftily, over his clavicles, swinging back and forth, kicking into his chest. 
He can’t stand the sight of him either, however. How strange. 
Once inside the warmth of his apartment, he can’t help but rid you of the hideous flannel of his that you’re wearing, bunching it up in his fists and throwing it away to the corner of his bench on the side of his wall without you knowing. With his hand on the small of your back, he guides you to his living room and he lets you skim your sight all around it, slipping his fingers under the hem of your tiny top, just touching you there. White walls, brown leather couch, a TV that takes up the most of the space alongside the kitchen with a plain dining area consisting of an old wooden, rectangular table with four chairs. A huge singular space of nothingness that has never felt home-like, not until you’ve stepped inside. 
Now, all of a sudden, it has colors. Vibrant, yet soft-toned with each inhale of his breath. You bring your oxymorons everywhere you go and they stay where you reside, even if you move someplace else. The evidence of it is in his very body. While he feels at his most fragile, he also senses himself to be strong. Strong enough to take care of you right at this moment, be there for you and give you anything you’d ever want. And while his eyes are still wet, cheeks bedewed by his softness, he also wants to break this place—self-blame creeping in, threatening to emerge from the hidden spots somewhere within the battlefield of his chest. 
This is his fault. Had he never said yes, you wouldn’t be in pain and neither would his friend be. But in that scenario, he wouldn’t know you existed. Wouldn’t have you. Would lead a forlorn life, with his paints and his alcohol. 
You would be happy with Yoongi. Radiant, glowy. With your glitters, your little dresses. Your nighttime robes and your little lingerie. 
Would you? Has he ruined your happiness? Has he ruined you? 
Jungkook turns you around to him. He needs to ask you; he needs to have the certainty, otherwise he won’t sleep tonight. Won’t even close his eyes—the thoughts would eat away his drowsiness. Leave only wakefulness in their wake. Jungkook presses his lips against your forehead, lingering there, formulating his words, carefully. His hands clutch your shoulders. Your frail, slender shoulders. 
Yoongi devastated your appetite enough that you lost all your soft fleshiness. He took it away and he doesn’t even perceive it. It was clear to him by the way you pushed your plate away, when your emotions rushed through; you didn’t have to say a word. And although he grieves the personal loss, still this is something he’ll never forgive him for. 
“Would you have been happy if you never knew me?” he asks, subduedly, torment clawing at his vocal cords. “Would you have been happy with him?” 
A teardrop spills down your cheekbone, plopping onto the material of your top, soaking it. You furrow your brows, seem angry at his choice of words and he regrets them, enough that his mouth rounds in a tender emotion that he’s too weak to stifle back. And then you bunch up his T-shirt, just like you did earlier in the dressing room, and there’s a tendril of relief that maybe he didn’t fuck up so majestically. He wants to weep; holding them back pains him too much and that ease, that repose is all he wants. It’s not that he’s shy or unwilling to let out his feelings—it’s just that he’s putting yours above his, deeming them more important. He wants to be strong for you, someone you can lean on—and how can he do that for you when he’s crumbling on the inside? 
“How can you say that to me?” you ask in disbelief and Jungkook wants to rewind back the time. Wants to keep quiet and just hold you through this fateful night. He winces, looking away, his own chin quivering this time and he can’t—he can’t hold back. He possesses no strength. A tear trickles down his cheek, one full of agony, hot against his skin and he whimpers, he whimpers when you cradle his face in your hands, step on your tippy toes and press your lips against his. Your mouth is so warm and he’s shivering with cold; silky while his are ruined by the constant biting he did in the car. He is a ruination—how can you want him? He ruined your relationship. And now even his tears have stained your angelic, pure face. 
“I feel like I’ve ruined everything,” he admits and his chest hurts, lungs tight, body trembling in that persisting cold. “I’ve ruined your relationship. I’ve ruined your life. Yoongi’s. Caused so much pain, so much trauma. Only because I let my friends convince me into going out when I came back from the military.” 
The wrinkle between your brows smooths down and you pout, caressing his face. Jungkook can’t halt the rivulet of his liquid emotions. Not when he feels your love so awfully intensely, embracing him around and around, tightening, giving him a sense of safety. 
“Can I tell you something?” You take his hand in yours and Jungkook already misses your warm touch on his face. He nods. “Where’s your room?” 
He leads you there and you crawl onto his bed, patting the space beside you, curling on your side. He mirrors your position and you prop the side of your leg on his, intertwining your fingers with his on the bedding, moving his hand to your mouth. 
And your words seep into his fist. 
“We were together for five months and I never met his family. Never met his friends, except you. I never really thought about it in depth because he kept me busy, despite the fact all we did was fuck. It was enough for me, I guess, because I’d been alone for a long, long time before I met him. And I’m a bit of a loner myself so I didn’t mind that we spent all of our time in his apartment, fucking and watching movies. It wasn’t until I met you, Jungkook,” you pause, taking a big breath in, fondling his knuckles with your thumb, soothing him, soothing the drowsiness that is suddenly falling upon him like a blanket, waving off his tears, drying them. “That I realized it’s not really supposed to be like this in my life. I remember that night when he was out with you and I was in the bathroom. I thought about when was the last time he took me out and I shivered. I shivered, Jungkook. It was the first seed sown and I didn’t know. And when you came into my life, I spent my weekends out with you. You took me to your cabin, you took me out to dinner dates. Even today you took me to the mall. I realized it’s supposed to be like this. Yoongi never did that.” 
Your words tingle across his fist and he’s quick with his own. “But were you happy?” 
So are you. You don’t hesitate. “I thought I was, but the way I’m happy with you can’t compare to the way I thought I was happy with him.” 
The truth wafts in the air, sweetening it and another onrush of tears come out of his tear ducts. He leans in closer to you, nose to nose, sniffling, sobbing quietly and you kiss his hand. Over and over, breathing against his skin. Light opens in him as the truth unfolds—with the little time he had with you, he managed to make you happier. Not just happy, but happier.
“I had a lot of time to think about this. It wasn’t just today that he didn’t speak to me. He barely did throughout the week, but today was the worst of it all and I couldn’t take it anymore. It hurt, it hurt so much,” you continue and Jungkook knows how much it pains you, when Yoongi abandons you over and over, clawing his fingernails in your scars. He’s glad, brims completely with that gratefulness that it also rolls down his cheeks, mingling with his tears, that you were strong enough to put a stop to it—as hard as it was. “And you know what I think? Yoongi needs someone like that. Someone who’s a much bigger loner than I am. Someone who’s okay with staying home, with keeping things casual. He needs a friend and I’ll continue being that for him, but not in the way he wants. I’ll be there for him, but not as closely as he was used to, you know? It has to be a process. I can’t just disappear out of his life. I don’t have the heart to do that.” 
Extending his arm, Jungkook invites you to rest your head against his bicep—only because he yearns to touch you. Without untangling your intertwinement, you lay against him, breathing in his scent and Jungkook wraps the same arm around your shoulders, cocooning you in. Body to body, his lips against your forehead. You look up at him and he looks down at you, a profound exchange of glances. The reality shifts once more, the energy deepens, filling it with something beyond affection and love—fate thickening the air, intense, earnest and impassioned. And submitting to it, Jungkook raises your chin and kisses you, deeply, slipping his tongue inside just briefly. Kisses your cheek, your neck, your shoulder, hides himself in that crook, breathing with you and nothing else.
A brand new reality. 
He can’t help but think about how smart you are. How admirable, how good. How well you handled everything, how well you made an order out of your life and ultimately out of Yoongi’s, too. Like Jungkook will take care of you, you will take care of Yoongi—not leaving him on his own with his shattered heart and mental health. He just hopes that sometime soon, he will be able to have a part in it, too. It’s his utmost wish. No matter how upset he was with him, how strongly he disliked him in certain moments, it’s still a person he loves, a person he spent the last ten years of his life with. A family, almost. 
“Do you think he’ll ever forgive me?” Jungkook whispers, squeezing you against his body, drawing you closer until your lungs and his gain that singular synchronization. Your leg straddles his torso and he grows greedy, needing you even closer. Needing to get underneath your skin. 
“I’ll try my best to make it happen,” you whisper back, running your fingers through his hair. The light that shines in your eyes faintly illuminates his shadowy room and it’s precisely the one he longed to see. Something tells him it’s here to stay and it drives his thumb to caress your wet lashes, the skin beneath your eyes, your rose-kissed cheek. 
Jungkook trusts you. You’re such a badass that you will succeed in anything you set yourself out to do. And he tells you. Asks you if you want to take a bath. Thinks it will distract your heart from what it knows, from what it’s used to. Teach it something new—something you will connect only with him.
And your reaction enlarges his heart to the point that it breaks his ribcage. Your eyes widen, its light erupting, blinding him, and you gasp, lifting your whole body and grabbing his shirt in your fists. He chuckles in endearment. 
“You have a bathtub?” 
And your eyes almost fall out of their sockets at the sight of it once he carries you to his bathroom and sets you down. He kisses the back of your head, his hands on your hips, guiding you closer to the bathtub, reaching over to lift the tap and let hot water pour down. You both need it after such an emotionally-exhausting day and Jungkook is eager to get in with you. 
“Stay here. Don’t strip. I’ll get your candle,” Jungkook says, lowly, squeezing your hips once and caressing your bum as he turns around and heads to the kitchen. 
He wants to be the one who takes off your clothes. Plans to do something with you he hasn’t done in a long while, something he deems you deserve after everything you’ve been through. He grabs your mango-scented candle, your bag of cheese balls, a lighter and a chair and returns to you. 
You’re crouching by the bathtub, your hand flowing in the hot water, its steam curling, tenderly, your hair cascading down your back. Jungkook pats the back of your head to announce that he’s come back and you smile up at him, your eyes big and twinkling, so magnificent that he grows weak in the knees, butterflies fluttering their wings in his stomach. 
Lighting up your candle, you watch as he does it, each three knots flaring up to life and suffusing the air with a balmy, tropical scent. He sets it down on the chair and, helping you stand up to your feet, he doesn’t waste a second. His fingers hook under the hem of your top and fling it out. And because he knows you’ve never bared yourself like this before him, he hides your nakedness by pressing you against his chest, your soft breasts a pleasure, his digits sliding beneath your leggings and dragging them down your hips, looking over your shoulder. You shimmy out of them, moving your hips ever so delightfully and before he knows it, he’s on his knees—kissing the apex of your thighs as he takes your feet out of the pant legs. And he thinks he could stay here all his life. 
Jungkook looks up at you as he removes your socks, kissing your knee without breaking the gaze, and he hopes that you can sense his love for you in it, the unyielding stability that he will cling to you with his body and soul—simply, with his entire being. 
Rising slowly, he kisses his pathway up, leaving behind the translucent evidence of that love. Your mound, which makes you giggle, a celestial symphony to his ears, your full tummy where he hopes your invisible rose tattoos still are, both sides of your ribs, the middle of your breasts, your sternum, your collarbones, your throat, your chin—up and up until his lips find yours. And he devours them. With such vigor that you hum into his mouth, your hands reaching for his shirt again. 
Oh, you want him to get in as well. Very well. 
He wanted to be the witness to your relaxation, but if it’s your desire that he shares it with you—by all means. He lets you take off his shirt, lifting his arms for you, and you’re quick to allow your hands to discover the parts they don’t know. His mole beneath his left pec that he caught you staring at shortly after that turn of events at the cabin. You press your mouth against it, unravel your love for it there by grazing your teeth against it before you lick it over with your tongue, going as far as marking the spot right beside it. Jungkook sinks his fingers in your hair, reveling in it, tummy tingling, holding you like that as you do what you please. Your own digits descend to his pants, setting him free from them and when you get on your knees just like him, his cock tightens in your face. 
And he dies, angels know for how many times today, when you rub your face in this intimate part of him, his heart bursting.
Not now—he can’t let you do that now. He wants your muscles to relax first before he can strain them all over again, in a much different way. 
“My sweetie,” he starts, sighing, rubbing your scalp. He takes you by the back of your neck, sliding his hand underneath your armpit, and drags you up. A healthy, radiant flush adorns you and he’s glad for the paleness to be gone. Glad his body is the cause of it. It makes his heart happy. “Not now. Let’s get in the tub.” 
Your stiffened nipples brush against his bare chest and he almost doubles over, loving the feeling of it. The sigh that leaves your mouth, so akin to his, too. 
“But you’re hard,” you whisper, tugging down his boxers until his cock springs free and you immediately wrap your small hand around it, squeezing him lightly. 
He can’t help but to grunt, the faint pleasure dizzying. He missed your hand, missed your touch. Haven’t had it in so long. It fits so well in your fist and he believes, in all seriousness, that it belongs to you. It’s yours. 
He brushes his lips against yours, but he doesn’t kiss you. His brain malfunctions a little bit, the pleasure you’re giving him zapping his dominance. “You like holding me like this?” 
You fondle his tip with your thumb and he hisses, sparks of electricity coursing down his body and he hums at the aftershocks. So good. He feels his arousal drip for you; feels himself lengthening in your hand. You nod, watching it happen, and while it feels nice to be looked at like that, he wants your eyes on him. He cradles your face in one hand, making you look at him, and he pecks you. At the contact, you finally nod your head. Jungkook envelops his palm around your fist and guides you to squeeze him harder, groaning onto your mouth. 
“You’re such a good girl,” he praises and embraces you, hiding himself in the crook of your neck again, inhaling you. Petrichor, mango, your personal scent. It’s all he wants to breathe in for the rest of his life. It’s what heaven must smell like. Actually, heaven must be what he’s hugging. 
You whimper and for it Jungkook tightens his hold around you. Skin to skin. He’ll never get over it. “I love being good for you.” 
He hums his approval, following the cascade of your hair down your back with his palm, rooting at your bum, grasping the flesh. “You’re the best girl. Let’s get you clean.” 
The loss of contact aches and he can see it even on your face, an adorable pout forming on your mouth. Helping you get in the bathtub, you wait until he joins you and it’s only then that you sit down, unsure of how both of you are going to fit in such a small space like this. Knees in between his, you exchange a few giggles in the awkwardness of it all before Jungkook kisses them and leads you to lean back against him, your spine against his chest, your body getting lost in his. 
Turning off the tap, the water is scorching but pleasant, his muscles relaxing, the very little remnants of the fight of his self-blame tearing apart at last. It must be as enjoyable for you because once you settle in and you take in the heat, the effect of the candle, the dimmed light and the soft shower of rain pittering against the windows, you let loose completely, your head slack against his sternum, breathing steadily, eyes fluttering closed. Jungkook wraps his arms around you, your breasts pressed against them, and he loves the feeling of your raw femininity in his hands, in such a nonsexual context. His arousal might be alive and longing for you, but that feeling, somehow, overweighs it in a way he’s unable to understand. 
He doesn’t mind; he could stay like this. 
And both of you do for some time, feeling each other’s top halves of bodies, resting, thinking of nothing, until you tip your chin and, puckering your lips, you ask for a kiss. Arch your back until your breasts bounce free from his hold. His cock twitches against your back from the sight and you smirk. 
Sly little girl. He cages them once again, though this time quite differently. One hand grabs the flesh at the base, the other sneaks to your chin, your other breast nudged in the crook of his elbow. His finger traces the lines of your lips, flattened now, kissing it every once in a while. And as if it was a signal for you to open up when he stalls his movement in the middle, you open up for him. And the feeling of your tongue, the suction of your lips, the sound of it all—it drives him to head down the path of absolute madness. 
He might have just found his ultimate weakness. 
Jungkook adds a second finger in, when you angle your body, so he can have a good view of it, your head propped against the bathtub wall, lidded eyes fixed on him. 
So much for relaxing. He pulls his fingers out of your mouth, swiftly, causing your brows to knit in confusion. It humors him, but you’re not getting your way that easily. 
“You should relax,” he scolds in a teasing manner, not meaning a word of it. “You’ve had a long day of shopping.” 
You laugh through your nose, a soft smile gracing your lips and for a split second, Jungkook wonders if he didn’t ruin the moment again by altering the reality again, bringing back the memory of what’s happened. If he didn’t invite in your guilt, perhaps. You’re here with him, about to be made love to, while the person you still love is dealing with brokenness on the other side of the city. 
And he tells you in the form of a kiss sunk into your cheek, drawing your body closer to him, cradling the back of your neck, squishing you against him. It causes you to turn your body to the side, slightly, and Jungkook hikes you higher, letting you lean your face against his cheek like that, pecking you over and over again. There isn’t enough body of water to overspill from the tub, but your shifting caused small waves to lap at your body and Jungkook finds himself transfixed by the sight of it. It seems as though the ripples are worshiping your body and an inkling to do the same, to do better, rises in him—as well as the impulse to tell you with words this time. 
He should verbally communicate with you. Just to be safe. 
“Did I remind you of it again?” 
Your fingertips follow the valleys of his abdomen, half dipped in the water. 
“Remind me of what?” you say and there’s a striking gentleness to your voice, some kind of blissfulness that feels terribly foreign to him. “Of my freedom?” 
A bearable tightness clutches his chest, interlaced, most heartily, with the simplicity of his shock. Freedom. With his directions, you set yourself free. It should be something to perhaps honor and rejoice over—so why is there still a morsel of pity swarming in him? He needs you to tell him. 
A streamlet of tears blurs his vision. Because his clinginess to you intensifies with each move forward, for the most part. Because he feels bad for his friend, for the lesser. 
“Why do I feel so bad for him?” Jungkook questions, pressing you harder against him until there isn’t any more space to push you into. 
You plop your body onto his. Chest to chest. Tummy to tummy. His cock, a bit soft now, against your femininity. Nonsexually, in all its beauty. You drag your thumbs under his waterline, collecting his essence of pain. His heart constricts. 
“My freedom is his,” you say, still holding him like that—both palms on his cheeks. “We’d be stuck in a circle like this. We’d go round and round until one of us would burst and end things eventually. He’d never fully heal in this environment. He’d never look past his own insecurities, not when I’d continue to enjoy myself with you the way I always did.” 
He thinks the merry go round had already begun the moment he and Yoongi made up and tried again. And considering the last thing he said to him on the phone today, there’s nothing left to do but to accept it. 
Your freedom is his. Those words ring in his headspace, settling there. By unbuckling yourself from the seat of that ride, you did the same for him. And while you got off, Yoongi still remains seated. 
For now. 
He’ll get out of there. Jungkook believes in him. 
“I’m meant to be with you,” you say and his heart goes wild, violently, under your forearm. For you. You’ve said it. You’ve made it official. Brought it into this new reality and Jungkook could weep again—and he does. Touched by his emotions, you kiss his tears, sighing against them. “I’m yours, Jungkook. Have been the moment I looked into your eyes the very first time.” 
Your bare, boundless truth drives him to reveal his, too. Such power you have, such strength. 
“You know I have feelings for you, right?” he murmurs, an allusion to the way you wept together in the dressing room, brushing your hair back, feeling his tenderness radiating off of his eyes, immensely. How easy it is, to tell you something groundbreaking like that, even as absurdly as he did. “Don’t let go of me. Don’t let go of those feelings. Keep them safe.” 
Your own tears pool in your waterline and you nod, a smile glinting upon your lips. So you knew, felt the love like he did, enkindled by your mutual release. He wasn’t wrong. His heart pounds and for the first time upon this trajectory, this doesn’t feel unreal. It feels real. Alive, possible, full of life. 
“I do, too. Held them in for so long. Never admitted it to myself for his sake. But that’s over now. I’ll keep it safe. All of you, Jungkook.” 
You love him. 
His sobs gather in his sternum, his lungs too small to capture them in place. 
You love him. And it’s real. 
Gripping your hair, he kisses you, deeply. And both streams of tears turn into one river—and both of you can’t halt the hunger creeping in. The hunger for more, for your love to burst at last and absorb your reality. Tongues mingling, tasting something new. Teeth clashing, lips tingling. Breaths hard and ragged. Jungkook can’t take it. Can’t hold back his body from lifting off of the rounded wall of the tub, the water sloshing and splashing all around. 
And then you say something that grazes his madness ever so unmercifully. 
“Put it in.” 
He groans, biting your bottom lip, fingertips making dents on your small waist. Horny girl, asking for something you can’t handle. He swears, his arousal awakening yet again in full speed, taking over him wholly. “I haven’t stretched you out yet.” 
You grind your femininity against his tightening cock and he’s done for, feeling your pulse. “Stretch me out like this.” 
He squeezes your ass hard, making you moan onto his mouth, in effort to make you listen to him and submit to his better knowing. “It’ll hurt, sweetheart.” 
Your breath wafts over him as you close your lips over his, sucking. “I can take it.” 
Such a stark contrast to the words you uttered in the dressing room. His madness heightens. So much that he moans into your lip lock, dipping you in the water to make you laugh, clutching onto him as you yelp, your adorable laughter vibrating through the bathroom, bouncing off of the walls and sneaking, in the long run, into the chambers of his heart, coming to live there.  
This is happiness. 
And the vibrations are too, too much for him to handle. So unusual, so beautiful. 
“Hold onto me,” Jungkook commands as he wraps your legs around his torso tighter and rises, stepping out of the bathtub and reaching for a towel in his cabinet while his other hand holds you steady by his forearm under your bum like a child. 
Leaving you to your own strength for a second, he wraps the large fabric around you both, bunching the ends in his fist on your back, exiting out of the bathroom and laying you down onto his bed. Your hair sprawls on his bedding and he thinks you look like an angel, maddened just the same by something beyond lust, by something way purer. He kisses your lips, fleetingly, and begins to focus on your neck, unfurling his love there. He sucks your wet skin, licking it all over, scattering his hard kisses there—the ones that drive you wild, moaning loudly and bravely, deservingly so. And he marks this victorious day there with pretty, pretty colors of red and purple. Doesn’t stop. Not until you beg him, writhing underneath him, excited and eager. 
“Please, Jungkook, take me.” 
Such sweet, innocent words. He listens, cooing, dragging you further up on the bed, so he can lie on top of you and take his hard kisses further down, marking all the places where your invisible tattoos are, bringing them to life all over again. Above both of your nipples, especially on the right one, where that frilly rose was, covering the peak. And he feels you melt, feels you soak his lower abdomen when he sucks on that nub, flicking his tongue, making you cry out so beautifully, so desperately that his arousal for you rigidifies. And when he looks at his artwork, fists propped on either side of you like his knees, it steals all of his breath. 
“You look so beautiful like this. All mine.” 
All his, wet with the last drops of water, with the pearls of his saliva, with your essence coating your folds. Adorned with red tattoos. He has his own on his arm and hand, except on his chest and he thinks the one he gave you make up for it. Thinks they’re his as much as they’re yours and it causes his length to twitch against his stomach, so terribly needy for you. 
“And you look beautiful like this. All hard for me,” you mimic his words and he grows feral, even more so when you continue. “It’s all mine, isn’t it?” You take him into your hand again, but he pins both of your wrists down, above your head. And the smile you grace him with—it makes him yearn to make love to you like this. Bound, while the rest of you would remain the quite opposite. 
He growls, kissing you. “All yours. All yours for you to take and come around. All yours, my sweetheart. Always has been.” He kisses you harder and you whimper. Pulls away just to swirl his tongue around yours, open mouth and all, before closing his lips down again in a profound, warm and homely lock. “Spread your legs for me. I’m gonna get you ready for it.” 
He does it himself, folding you in half, the glistening of your folds visible even in the slight lack of light in the room. Oh, he can’t have you like this. Reaching behind himself, he turns on his bedside lamp, bathing you in a soft, yellow light that suits you the most. You’re holding your legs apart for him and he places wet kisses on the back of your thigh, ravagedly, to reward you for it, trailing them down until he’s face to face with your drenched princess parts. And it’s a groan of relief that emits out of him when he’s this close to you, hands pushing your knees down, spreading you even more to gratify his hunger. 
He’s starving. Terribly starving. 
And he rolls his eyes back when he takes the entirety of you into his mouth, tongue dragging upon your slit, up and down, drinking your dew, penetrating only a little bit just to tease you, just to mess around with your madness. And when he flattens his tongue against your swollen clit, you cry out. Surprise him when you grip his hair, enough to cause him to flick his eyes to you. Your mouth is parted, but grinning nonetheless, your own eyes heavily lidded, emitting light and joy and Jungkook simply decides to make this experience better for you. 
He lifts your hips in the air and devours you, lapping at your clit over and over again, letting you see what he’s doing to you without taking his eyes off of you, nose pressed against your shiny mound. You whisper your vulgarities and he’d let it pass if he didn’t consider this a holy, spiritual occurrence. He withdraws and it doesn’t go unnoticed by him, the way your slick trickles down your clit and your mound, rooting in the squishy part of your lower tummy. He hums, delighting in the sight. 
“Be good,” he scolds, smiling down at you and your grin widens. You nod your head, your hands still crossed above you without his to hold them down. Scratch his words—you’re already the best girl. He licks up the trickle of your essence trailing down your clit, making you writhe again. “Feel how wet you are for me.” 
Carefully, you skim your palm down your soaked belly, gasping, until your fingers reach your nub, the concoction of his saliva and your arousal seeping into your skin. He encourages you with noises of approval to keep going, bending you even more in half, your back leaning against his thighs, the pads of your fingers circling your center, eyes wide at the discovery, able to see just how celestially aroused you are for him. So beautiful. He bites onto the flesh upon the side of your thigh, only because he can’t help it, soothing down the sting with his tongue. And he hums at the sound of your moans, at the sound of your slipperiness when you drag your fingers down to your clit and stop there. 
“Hm, yes, sweetheart, rub that pretty clit for me,” he murmurs and his chest explodes at the principle that he’s able to say that to you. That he doesn’t need anyone’s permission or approval. That he can do whatever he pleases with you without any consequences to reap. That he’s free. You must be thinking about this, too, but in a different way, because you hesitate. He’ll destroy that dubiety. It won’t show its face again—as long as he lives on this earth. “You can do it, my love. You’re free.” 
The reassurance washes over you and rids you of that fleeting negativity. He understands this is new for the both of you—there’s some still getting used to, so it’s completely normal. He’ll try his hardest to make this as much of an easy ride for you as he can. It’s his duty. 
“Don’t be afraid,” he continues, adding your name, softly. “You’re here with me and you’re safe.” 
Jungkook leans over and kisses you. You nod into the kiss and he returns to his position, catching you rubbing your clit, slowly, with two fingers, the other spread on your folds. And both of you moan simultaneously. 
“That’s it,” he whispers, enthralled, making way for the sound of your slick to overpower the atmosphere. “That’s my good girl. Make yourself feel good for me.” 
You whimper his name, buckling your hips in his hold, squeezing your eyes shut and Jungkook can see the waves of pressure charging your tender body. Now is the time for his participation. 
He sinks his middle finger inside, making your eyes pop open and stare him down, just for you to submerge yourself under the surface of that sea of lust and let your irises whisk back. Your walls clench around him and he waits until you speed up your circles to join his other finger, biting his lip to push back his desire to sink himself inside you. He tries to pay little attention to the way he drips for you. 
But then you use the rest of your fingers to bring yourself to your climax and Jungkook takes it as a sign. Another finger in, he curls them, fucking you the way you like. Fast, grazing your sweet little spot that beckons your sweat out of your pores and when your pussy drools even more for him, he adds another. You gasp and he knows exactly how you’re feeling, how good this is for you. 
“You feel so full, sweetheart, don’t you?” he coos, jackhammering his hand harder and you drench it, completely. He flattens his fingers, allowing you to see the thick sheen and you mewl, a litany of his name spilling along. “You’re so wet. So horny for me, aren’t you? You’re gonna come?” 
You scream your agreement, squirming, strumming your fingers harder and this is it for him. He changes direction. Fucks his fingers up and down and your toes curl, chest heaving heavily and you just keep on screaming. A delightful sound. 
“Come for me, then. Like the best girl you are.” 
You clench around him. So much that he can barely move his fingers, sunk in so deeply. He just flexes them, drawing out your orgasm and you give it to him. 
And you’re wet all over again. Sprinkled by pearls upon pearls of your pleasure. He is, too, and it worsens his desperation for you. 
You’re panting, but he’s not done with you. Setting you down, he laps up the violent evidence of your orgasm, making you twitch in overstimulation and he eases the pressure of his tongue for you. Sucking on your folds, he decides to mark you there. Just below your hip bone, too. Such intimate places. Perfect for a temporary keepsake like this. 
Hovering above you, he circles his tongue tinged with your taste around yours, forcing you to moan again. And he kisses you softly. “You deserved that orgasm.” 
You whine, red all over, and Jungkook understands you need more. He pulls away, clutches himself to line up at your entrance, but you stop him. 
“I want you.” 
He smirks, longs to hear you be more specific. “How?” 
You huff. So adorable. “In my mouth.” 
He chuckles. Should’ve asked where, but he’s at your service—he’s willing to give you anything you want. “All right, but just for a little bit, okay?” You nod, vehemently, and he pats your cheek. “On your knees.” 
Oh, he’ll never tire of the view of your submissiveness, of your hunger for such a private part of him. He makes a mess for you on the towel, dripping more than he ever has, and he holds himself at the base, grabbing your jaw in his hand. Brutality, the one he’s obsessed with, swims past your irises when you gaze up at him. A feral animal, an angel in hiding—he’d love to embellish you with the sticky traces of his fixation, but he shouldn’t, no matter how much he craves it. He can’t stain you, not today. Can’t ruin the holiness. He’ll let you play with him before he seals it for all eternity. 
Tomorrow he will. Smear you with it until it’s all your pores know. 
Jungkook traces the lines of your mouth with the tip of his length, just like he did with his finger in the bathtub, and you hum, liking it. He can vividly see your yearning to rub your face against him again and he lets you, encourages you in fact, pulling you closer until you nuzzle your nose against his girth, his skin caressing your cheek, and you kiss him all over. Place your hands over his and suck him inside your mouth, drinking his precum. Only to withdraw right away, sit back on your legs without lifting your hands, and look up at him with the vastness of your overbearing innocence and love. 
“You’re mine,” you purr, fucking him with your fist. 
Jungkook nods, just once. Doesn’t even feel his butterflies anymore, too numbed by you, by the pleasure you’re giving him. “That’s right, my love.” 
You suck in a breath, biting your lip hard as if it took all of your energy not to make him come at this very instant. And you lengthen your spine, asking for a kiss again, and he bends at the waist, kissing you nastily, pushing your head back to his cock, inciting you to do what you truly crave to. 
And you take him so well, your cheeks hollow, and he’s unabashed, free to let out his male noises, whimpering for you, panting heavily as you bob your head, slurping him, spitting on him. You toy with his tip, tugging at his length, colliding into his fist and it isn’t until you rub your face against his balls that it becomes his undoing. He stalls his orgasm, strains to do so, just to please you and he pries your hands away from his length, lets you focus on his sack. The least he could do to last. But then you grab it into your fist, sucking his balls, one by one, into your mouth, even try to take both of them at once and that’s it. He can’t breathe, his heart wringing painfully with all the love that brims in him for you. No one has ever done that to him. 
You flick your tongue against them, your other hand wrapping around his tip again, tugging and he nears dangerously close to the bursting of his orgasm. 
“That’s enough.” 
He draws you away from his cock, using all of his strength, and pins you down. A splutter of your giggles waft in the air, your chin wet with your spit and he moves his mouth so rapidly against yours that you struggle to kiss him back, growing calm all of a sudden, as if overcome with the gravity of it all. 
He looks at you for a long while. Puffy, red mouth, that he craves to bite onto—and he does. Darkened eyes, full of freedom and exhilaration. Neck, chest, tummy and the rest of the delicious parts of you scattered with hickeys, with his own personal keepsakes. He loves you so much that he becomes frustrated, needing to let it out somehow. All of his muscles tense and he clenches his grip on your wrists. 
“You want me to die? Is that what you want?” he hisses, speaking of the sloppy blowjob you gave him, gliding his wet cock across your seashell. You lose a breath, drowsy eyes fluttering, spreading your legs for him. No wonder you’re tired—you gave it your all. He sinks his teeth hard into his bottom lip, his frustration rising, brows knitted. “You can’t play with me like that. I was seconds away from coming all over your pretty face.” 
“I wanted you to,” you say, loud and clear, and Jungkook is hot all over. 
Turning you over to your side, he squeezes the flesh of your bum until it hurts as a punishment, knowing you’re not ready for the full thing. It’s too soon. Your wincing breaks into a low, alluring moan and it fills him with adrenaline. And then you smile at him, light flashing in your countenance. You’re anything but punished; you’re pleased. 
Looks like you need another form of punishment. 
Fuck it, fuck all spiritual aspects of this. The angels in heaven need to look away for now and cover their ears. He’s going to make love to you in a way they’ve never witnessed before and it’s good that they never will. 
“What did you say?” Jungkook feignedly questions, pinning you back down and burying himself in your heat. Having stretched you out well enough, he gives you his half right away, but he doesn’t stop there, not when you lift your chest off of the mattress, not when you lose yourself in the sudden fullness and the music of your mutual moans. You grip him so tight that he forgets, for a split moment, what he’s punishing you for. 
You stammer, seemingly forgetting, too. And when his mound kisses yours, your words falter altogether—a crescendo into silence. Eyes wide, unblinking, taking him most courageously. Jungkook hums, immensely proud of you, slowly pounding you into the mattress with hard strokes. 
And when he gives you a particularly unmerciful one, you scream, shaking all over in his hands. 
“Yes, sweetheart, that’s what you get,” he purrs, grinding his hips, loving the way he toys with your senses, your peaked nubs digging into his chest, and you can’t catch your breath, your whole body tense. “Too deep?” 
You nod. “Too deep, baby, I can’t take it, fuck. It’s too much.” 
Cooing, he kisses you. The pet name, your tightness—he’s losing his mind and it’s your fault. Your wonderful, wonderful fault. You don’t even let him pull out, you keep him caged in, your walls fluttering against him and he whimpers, shaking like you, unable to continue kissing you. 
“Relax, my love, or you’re really gonna kill me,” he croaks out, ascending to heavenly places where they don’t, in most certainty, don’t want to see him. Sitting back on his feet, he thumbs your clit, helping you calm down. “Good girl. Feels good, stuffed full like this? My thumb rubbing your sweet little clit, hm?” 
It is a miracle, the way he knows your body and knows what to do with it because your walls loosen, enabling him to fuck you, sloppily, your slick squeaking along with your quickening breaths. You scream out your yeses, driving him to give you his all. 
“Just like that,” he whispers, approving, his balls tightening already, the pressure in his lower tummy becoming bigger. 
You deserve the full thing, though. Jungkook places your knee on his shoulder. And with each stroke, his mound stimulates your clit, getting you nice and fast to his level. 
He cradles your blissed-out face, the heel of his palm putting pressure on your throat. And onto that expression of elation, he uncoils his love for you, brutally fucking you until your whole body ripples beneath him. 
“Whose are you, huh?” he moans, driving into you, rearranging your guts. Sweat drips off of his forehead. “Whose pretty girl are you?” 
Your own sounds of pleasure rise in pitch and volume and he senses, he knows you’re about to come for him. 
“Yours, Jungkook, yours,” you choke out and he’s so proud of you that he hums, his balls slapping against your bum, and he kisses you, giving you his tongue. You suck on it, getting him right there to the edge of his orgasm. 
“Fuck, such a good girl. All mine. You know that I love you, right?” 
And the once reappearing absurdity of his choice of words pushes over that edge and you squeeze him, squeeze him hard, milking his cum out of you and he growls into your mouth. You take over each and every one of his senses, making them yours, and he fucks his cum into you, his mouth smacking against yours, as you whisper your I love you’s and he swallows them down. 
Heaven or something beyond. You created it and he wants to spend the rest of his life there. 
Panting, he kisses your jaw, marking you there for the last time. Unbelief grasping him that he finds himself in such a place glazed with love. “You love me?” 
You whimper, shuddering all over, your orgasm still seizing you. “I love you so fucking much.” 
He licks into your mouth, ending your release. “My best girl. I’ll take care of you. I’ll never let you go. You’re never getting out of my sight again.” 
Jungkook lets go of your wrists. They must be cramping, tingling and he massages them in the air, sitting back, his length still inside your homely heat. Your eyes wet again, sobs break out of your mouth and he shushes you most affectionately, his heart twinging. He lifts you and sits you down on his lap, hugging you close to his chest. Skin to skin. You cling to him with everything in you and he holds you together, so you don’t fall apart. 
“You’re my savior. My healer,” you wail, gripping his hair. As if your breaking wasn’t enough, your words hit him hard and his vision soaks along with yours. You’ve never told him that before—never told him the roles he has in your life. He appreciates them so much, holds them dear to his heart. Never wants to forget them. “Don’t ever leave me, please. I beg you.” 
It’s him who now breaks. Right there on your shoulder, beneath the waterfall of your hair. 
“I could never. You’re my life. You’re my everything. How could I ever leave you?” 
You sob harder, lifting your head, and the sight of your rawness makes him fall even more in love with you. Jungkook smooths down your hair and wipes away your tears. Kisses you, deeply, and lingers there. And along with the kiss, you and him exchange your last I love you’s for the night. 
Tub drained, candle snuffed out, cheese balls devoured, the rain finishing like that chapter of your life—Jungkook feels himself entering a brand new one with you, one where Yoongi isn’t present, as he dresses you in his clothes. For panties, he slinks your legs into his boxers, keeping them warm with a pair of his own joggers. Then, he tugs his hoodie down your head, pushing your arms through the sleeves. Smirks at the way his clothes fit you well. As if they were your own. At the way he matches with you. 
He overflows with a thrumming life. 
A brand new chapter filled with myriads of different, ecstatic possibilities. And you seal them to completion, when tucked in bed, lying on his chest, you sleepily utter the first prospect that you want to bring to life.
“Will you take me to your cabin tomorrow?” 
His breath hitches in his throat. He never thought he’d be returning there so soon, especially not with you. His mouth quirks up, body suffused with a foreign excitement, and right away he deduces the reason why you want to go there. 
“You really want that dildo, don’t you?” 
You merely laugh through your nose. 
Oh, he’s calling in sick tomorrow. Will take you there first thing in the morning. Will do absolutely anything for you. 
“I’ll fuck you hard with it until you completely drench it, then. Sleep for now, so we can get to tomorrow.” 
You kiss his clothed chest. Nuzzle your face in it. Whisper your thank you. Jungkook pretends he didn’t just get hard all over again. 
“Good night,” you say. 
He pecks your hair. “Good night, sweetheart.” 
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zyhkoo · 4 months ago
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☆ we do together - jason todd x f!reader
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fluff, vigilante reader, college au
you and jason work on your research paper
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With patrol done, the two of you immediately slumped on the couch. Though you had your own patrol route, you loved to get in Jason’s patrol route. Not that he didn’t mind of course, he’d gladly let you patrol with him. Today’s patrol was crazy though, it definitely wore the two of you out.
Not bothering to change into much comfortable clothes, you and Jason lazed on the couch. You were sitting down while he was on the far corner of the couch while his feet laid on your lap.
Your stomach grumbled, you forgot to eat your lunch a while ago because you were so busy with your college assignments.
You looked over at him “Jay..” you called out his name. Jason, whose eyes are closed while facing the ceiling, answered “Yeah?”
You sighed, “I’m hungry.. you promised to cook.” Jason slowly turns his face to you “Told you, you said you weren’t hungry while doing the assignment.” he scolded.
The two of you were in literature degrees, in the same class, same professors, and the same lectures. So any assignments, projects so on and so forth; Jason and you would always work together.
“I really wasn’t, I snacked too much.” you retorted “Can we just get takeout?” he asks while crossing his legs. You rolled your eyes and reached the phone to your pocket “Fine.”
You looked at the clock on your homescreen, 2:30 am. Then.. a sudden realization hit you. You tug on his jacket “Jason..” he looks at you with a lazy expression “Hm?”
You looked at him horrifyingly, he checked the clock then it hit him too.
“The research paper!”
You were quickly going through the food app while Jason scrambled to the laptop “Fuck we’re only halfway.” he curses, his hand moving to his forehead “At least it’s halfway…” you pointed out.
You look for sources while Jason reads and types out whatever is needed, if anyone walked in on both of you they’d be concerned to see two College students looking like zombies.
The pizza you ordered arrived, Jason opened the box and saw the toppings you disliked on the pizza “Thought you hated this?” he said, showing you the pizza.
She groaned “Ugh, I must’ve accidentally asked for it. Whatever, give me a slice I’m starving.”
Jason remembers waiting for the letters for both your college applications. You both graduated highschool together, and now this was the bigger deal. Jason was looking forward to being in college with you, especially in a degree you both absolutely were interested in.
He remembered you pacing on the manor waiting for the mail to come while Jason told you that it was going to be alright. You wanted to be in college with him too of course, you’ve known each other since forever and you want it to stay that way.
Damian knocked on Jason’s door with two letters on his hand “These are for you, Todd. Is she in there as well?” Jason took the letters from his small tiny hand “Yeah she is, thanks.” Jason says as he closes the door.
“Is this it?” you asked “Yep, here's yours.” the two of you read in silence, he was accepted. Jason looked at you, a small smile on his face. You were still reading the contents of the letter, focusing hard “So? What’d they say?”
You turned back to him with a bright smile “I'm in! You?” he returns the smile “Got accepted too.” you pulled him to a tight embrace “We’re starting college together oh my god I’m so happy.” she says.
He wanted to experience all the bad and good things in life with you. Because he loves you, your presence just makes him happy already. At first, he wasn’t sure if he was capable of loving, but with you it was enough.
Morning passed, Jason woke up on the table. A blanket was covering him and next to him was you, peacefully sleeping on the coffee table. He looked at your features and smiled, pressing a kiss on your forehead.
You stirred in your sleep “Jay?” he looks down “Yeah?” he answered your call, you shook your head, yawning. “Nothing.” he sighs softly, playing with your hair “Just wanted to call my name?”
You nodded “Yeah.” he yawned “Well, shit it’s twelve now. Can’t go to class today.” he comments, " you stretched your arms. “It’s okay fuck the professor.” you say “We’ll pass it tomorrow.”
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saintjosie · 6 months ago
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Hey, sorry for setting a bit of a depressing tone with this ask but im a struggling baby trans girl
Do you have any advice for coping with the thoughts of "i will never manage to mold my body into a woman's body"?
Right now i am unable to start transitioning due to multiple reasons - both social (especially family) and hrt accessibility related - and my biggest issue with my body is that it's just.. annoyingly masculine. Ever since i was 14 my legs had more and longer hair than my 30-something old cousin's husband. Ever since i was 12 i started feeling too ashamed of my body to wear short pants and it was only this year that i started feeling a bit more ok about it (I will not disclose my age publicly, but i am in university).
And it's like. It's so exhausting to look in the mirror and not only not recognise the face as my own, but often actively hate it. To look at my body and to barely tolerate it anymore
There are some things that i've tried. I've trimmed my leg hair (to a fourth of its original size), and the instant my parents noticed they mocked me. I'm trying to let my hair grow but not only am i getting bombarded with questions of "when are you gonna get a haircut/let me give you a haircut" from all members of my family, it's also in that incredibly awkwards state which i know i will have to push through, but it still makes it even harder for me to look into the mirror
Once again, sorry for the tone of this ask, but do you have any words of hope or advice?
im sorry youre going through all of that. its incredibly difficult and i feel for you. i think that one thing that i frequently see from people in the earliest stages in transition is the struggle of feeling like they will never see themselves in the mirror. and i get it. i was 29 by the time i started hormones and a big part of why i was scared to do it was because i also thought that i was never going to look the way i wanted to. and whether or not we like it, there is safety in being able to say, oh if i dont look the way i want to, then its better for me not to try at all. its a horrible feeling but its one that you've lived with for years and there is safety in the familiarity.
but that's the thing - no one ever looks 100% the way they want to. i dont know a single person who hasnt had the struggle of looking in the mirror and wishing they could change something. and yes, we as trans people face that much more than most other people but it is a human experience to want to change and better ourselves.
after four years of being on hormones, i still look in the mirror and see things i want to change but also that feeling is much much less now. and its not just the hormones either. i like the way i dress because i wear what i want to. i like my hair because i decided i wanted to grow it out and change the color. i stopped molding my appearance to fit other people's expectations. and in doing so, i found that liking something about myself mattered far more than if other peopled like it. so shave your legs! grow out your hair! when people ask you questions, dont answer or tell them to fuck off! you dont need to make excuses for yourself because you dont need an excuse to be who you want to be.
im gonna be completely honest with you - it will not be easy. and youre not going to wake up tomorrow and suddenly find that your entire perspective has changed. in fact it is very likely, and very human, to continue to question the decisions you make. but always remember, you know who you are. and if you dont know, then only you are capable of finding out. and so i say with all the love in the world, i hope you find yourself and learn to love yourself in the process <3
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