#i hope you know this is the single most and least funny thing i've ever seen simultaneously

[guardian5tiger3]

1. 2. 3.

And

4. ( Yes, it's a picture of chingy. )

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PICK A GROUP TAROT

1

Basically I think you're single with a big heart / a lot of love to give, and you have a friend that's gay or in a gay relationship or some of you maybe don't even realize if you have a crush that he's gay or has a boyfriend . Or youre in a three way relationship??????? If any of those are true or you literally just know two guys and one of them is similar to you somehow , they are talking about you . And it's possible one or both of them want you to be cut off from them or for you to have to leave something or a place behind . So you could actually be being plotted on in terms of them doing something maybe to get you kicked out of your place or fired ????! Dude if somebody IS in a gay relationship they could actually not be gay they could be straight and be making a mistake ...

WTF is this y'all damn . Looks like you've only been nice as f and in your own vibe . Do y'all have autism ????????? Or want to get checked for it ???! This the most confusing reading I've ever done . Cause it's possible these people are just reading you so effing wrong and being judgemental like for the few of you that that's your case I hope the culprit eats shit cause I especially feel your pain here . This also could be people from your past or something that happened in the past . Dude someone HATES you all cause you're just enjoying what you have or what you have worked for or your own vibe or something . Like why . WTF "with a cherry on top "bitch what the hell . You might have been excluded from a group of friends or something . . .... But you have the best energy though ... Like you're beautiful .uhm the advice is to flex on everyone ever. Just be bold about your vibes and how you look and flaunt it cause it'll mess these people's heads up It would make someone get so mad they'd prolly piss their effing pants hahaha . F k 'em . So that's ...your advice.... Good luck with ... This ....... Just flex on em idk they definitely have at least one or two people that know whoever these dudes are or whatever that look at stuff you post online too if you do or see you at a grocery store possibly??? Or at a restaurant if you're a waitress ..... Y'all get the point you would be seen and you'd have em freaking out ....... Bunch of nerds if you ask me , shoot.

( extra channeling . Someone ate some one ass I think it's these two guys that are gay with each other and it's funny and gross ? ) as if that's my business or anyone's but I think other factors involved make this justifiably hilarious for someone

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2

You are the last one standing in a situation. Channeling the hunger games here . You could be the only person in your own family to ever do something . You might have one best friend ( when I typed this, at this point I accidentally put 😉 this emoji somehow ????? ) or a pet .?

People have tried to delay you or throw obstacles your way or hurt you or something and I don't know that anyone or yourself ever could have imagined whatever destiny you have . It's going to teach a lot of people lessons . People that may have judged you especially if you live your life unconventionally . Whatever your destiny is is kind of shocking but will leave certain people in complete shame . I feel like some people you've dealt with somehow could never ever imagine admitting to being wrong on the level they may have been about you and it will be humiliating and ego shattering for a certain person or people . This is especially true if you tend to avoid conflict , or are a loner, or never experienced a party scene as a teen and young adult , or even like, sleep overs or birthday parties as a kid. You may have always been focused on things no one else really was while everyone else was in a way wasting their time with other things . It's so gonna pay off however the lifestyle similar to what I'm describing is that you've lived .

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3

Y'all seem good but maybe impatient about something or just, the future in general ? . You're either in love with someone OR that's what you're impatient about, your love life . Your soulmate is hurt right now and needs to or had needed to get away from something cause someone had some sharp words towards them not making things any better but making it actively get worse for them emotionally or mentally or physically . Whatever environment either of you are in it's not suitable for the type of love you two would have so there does need to be action taken in terms of fixing the chaotic or bad environment but sometimes it's up to this person to do and you are left maybe bored or inpatient then right ? If you guys want a family - like situation in any way be it just you two , pets , children , whatever . You can absolutely put your focus on preparing for that in any given way that you can .

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4

You're looking back on the past or rewatching old shows or movies or doing something for nostalgia maybe even eating something you used to . If this is what you're doing right now it's because subconsciously you want yourself to notice something negative that happened around that time . Or in your past generally . Something may have been not obvious enough or straight up going on behind your back or maybe you have blocked out trauma ? It looks like you're alright now but upset about the past . Don't force whatever you're trying to realize or remember but I think reading this might just help with that naturally coming up in your mind at some point . Make sure you don't get too lost in your mind and also consider practicing grounding yourself in the physical present moment . Something positive is about to happen to you . Either you're eating vegetables or you should be . Also look towards foods and activities that are positive for brain health . If you have a dog take the dog for walks or do that for more time or more often at this time . If you have a fish or hamster do not take a pet like that for a walk . Just a little PSA 😉 . there is one very good thing coming to you that might be humbling in a way but it is destined and it is great . It might come to you in the form of good news ? . But I can't say anything more about what it might be . I think the energy youre in now is very telling of what's to come as if youre preparing for something subconsciously. Take care .

[peachhcs]

Hiii!!

I was wondering if you could write something for samy and will based on this article: https://www.nhl.com/canadiens/news/my-man-mireille-boutin-on-michael-pezzetta?utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=post&utm_campaign=CHCcontent&utm_content=EN-0514-MyMan

Basically the nhl team’s media people asking the players’ significant other questions about them. Thanks so much :))

my girl: will smith on samy hughes

hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)

nhl elite prospects interviews will about samy & their relationship!

1k words

this was suppperr cute to write. i swear will’s a yapper when it comes to talking about samy. i switched it from the article so it was will talking about samy, hope u don’t mind, but i loved this request!!

au masterlist

"we've been best friends since we were kids. everything just makes more sense when i'm around her."

UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN — samy hughes is known for her tough offense on the soccer field.

but off the field, she's the "best person i've ever known," according to her boyfriend, will smith, a boston college forward.

while in san jose for a development camp, the nhl elite prospects were able to catch up with smith to ask him how he's been doing, including how his new relationship's been treating him.

TELL US ABOUT YOUR DYNAMIC GROWING UP.

it's funny because we never hung out by ourselves a lot when we were kids. i was pretty attached to her older brothers [quinn, jack, and luke] and she was attached to my sister [grace smith], so we never really hung out that much until we were older. although, we always got along. when we did hang out we enjoyed talking to one another and poking fun as if we were siblings. we really didn't get closer until i moved up to plymouth for the usntdp.

WHAT CHANGED YOUR RELATIONSHIP FROM FAMILIAL TO ROMANTIC?

at least for me, as i got older, my feelings started changing towards her. i started seeing her as an annoying sister less and less and the more we hung out when i was in michigan, the more attached i grew i guess. we started just..doing stupid stuff together and i just really liked hanging out with her. all the times where i thought the things we did together was just a sibling dynamic, i slowly realized it was a lot more than that.

WHAT DID YOU GUYS DO ON YOUR FIRST DATE?

i took her out to dinner in ann arbor and then we walked around for a bit before sitting on a bench and just talking for hours. it was definitely weird at first, but we eased into one another and it was fun getting to know her on a different level than what i've always known her as.

WHAT ATTRACTED YOU MOST TO HER?

her personality for sure. she's super outgoing, always knows what she wants, very independent, super caring. we're very similar in many aspects, hence why we're best friends. she looks up to her brothers a lot which i admire because i also look up to them. i also enjoy her extensive knowledge of hockey because of her family, so it's easy talking about the game with her. she's just always been someone i go to when i need a shoulder to lean on and it's just so easy with her, you know? i love getting to call her so we can talk about our days together.

OF COURSE, HOCKEY'S IN SAMY'S ROOTS. DO YOU GET HER ON THE ICE WITH YOU EVER?

oh yeah, 100%. whenever we're back at michigan or in boston, we're on the ice. she's the one dragging me outside sometimes so we can play 1v1 or something. she's always had that love for hockey even if she doesn't play competitively anymore. i also love seeing her out there because it's what bonded us when we were kids, so it's nice still getting to go out and do it with her. somehow she still beats me too. she doesn't play for 4 months and then we're back on the ice together she scores 3 goals before i can even get the puck in my possession. the guys chirp at me whenever that happens if they're around.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU WATCH HER SOCCER GAMES?

every single one of them are on my computer. it doesn't matter what i'm doing. as soon as the live stream starts, i'm booting it up to watch. the guys love watching her play, so i always get to turn it on the tv and then we scream at the stream for two hours together.

SPEAKING OF THE GUYS, WE HEARD SHE HAS A GREAT RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR LINEMATES AS WELL.

leno and perreault absolutely adore her which i think is really sweet. i was a little worried when i first introduced all of them back when we moved to mich, but the three of them grew close really quickly. sometimes i think they're more excited to see her than i am and that's saying a lot.

WE HEARD HUGHES IS A GREAT COOK. HAS SHE COOKED ANYTHING FOR YOU?

when we're at the lake house she loves cooking all of us breakfast. she makes a great omelette and french toast, like, the best i've ever had. we all go crazy for her breakfast in the mornings.

DO YOU GUYS EVER TRAIN TOGETHER DURING THE SUMMER LIKE RUNNING OR WORKING OUT?

i'm not a huge runner, but sometimes i will run with her when she goes out, or i'd bike along side her. our training schedules are pretty different, but when we're in the offseason we'd occasionally hit the gym together or do some casual workouts that won't kill us. she knows what the hockey training is like so it's no stranger to her when she does follow my lead. soccer, on the other hand, is a lot more sprints and footwork which is sometimes helpful for me.

CAN YOU TELL US ABOUT SOME OF SAMY'S BEST QUALITIES?

shes a huge team player. she's always looking out for those girls on her soccer team, helping them run drills, being someone to talk to—i really admire her for that. she's got a real big heart too. her love is so contagious. she's dependable, trustworthy, kind, beautiful—the list could go on coming from me.

ANY LAST WORDS YOU WANT US TO ADD?

i love her, haha. our parents knew way before us that we would end up together before we even knew. we've been best friends since we were kids. everything just makes more sense when i'm around her. this is probably corny, but i wanna spend the rest of my life with her. she's my rock.

[ccsainzleclerc5516]

This Is Where You Stand With Me

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x reader

Warnings: none

A/N: pls read this for better understanding thanksss!!

Sooo once upon a time, a few months ago actually, I started writing a Charles fanfic - never finished it - I had a reeeally good story in mind, wrote around 20 chapters and then I just got bored of it, BUT! I wrote some really good pieces that I'd be sorry no one ever read so I thought I'd post them. Actually I've already posted one part of the story that comes waay later than the ones I'm gonna post now, but anyway it's the one called Lovers .

Basically, it's a story about a girl (you) who broke up with her boyfriend of five years. She was very unhappy in the relationship because her boyfriend didn't treat her right all those years and then after she gathered her strength and broke up with him, she decided to live a little and go visit her best friend Sophie in Monaco. Sophie has been in a relationship with Carlos for a while, and his teammate Charles is in a relationship with a girl (Ava) who isn't with him for the right reasons and doesn't really care about him. due to a combination of circumstances, you stayed in Monaco to live in Sophie's apartment and started running social networks for Ferrari, filming behind the scenes and similar things. From the very beginning, you and Charles have a love-hate relationship. He keeps sending you mixed signals and you never know where you're standing with him.

Ok, hope you'll like it, let me know if you'd even like to read more parts! Bye!

This is the part where you, Carlos, Sophie, Kika, Pierre, Charles and Lando are on the yacht. Sophie introduces you to all of them here for the first time and you're very nervous about it so you drink a bit too much..

Y/N's POV

Carlos, Sophie and I were the first ones to arrive. Their firends, Pierre and his girlfirend Kika, Charles and his girlfriend Ava, and I guess the only single friend Lando, arrived shortly after us. For me, the biggest introvert on the planet, this was quite a large number of people to meet at once and I did feel very anxious.

Luckily there was a vast amount of drinks on the yacht so I found mine tranquilizers - cranberry vodka and sangria. As soon as the alcohol started coursing through my system, I soon opened up a topic to talk about with everyone. Well, almost everyone. Charles and his girlfriend Ava seemed to have some disagreements so they weren't really in the best mood. She looked like she didn't really wanna be here and he was annoyed that she didn't wanna be here at least that's what I heard when I was going to the toilet because they were alone inside and arguing.

The evening went on with us all sitting in the lounge area, talking and drinking. I was truly having so much fun and I got along the most with Lando. He's so sweet and caring and funny, I was enjoying his company. Eventually Ava left. She was able to leave since we didn't set sail but stayed in the marina. Charles was fuming that she left. When Carlos asked him why she left he said she made arrangements with her friends earlier, he didn't want to talk about it much. Charles went on the upper lounge area and Lando went after him so he wasn't alone and I stayed with Carlos, Sophie, Pierre and Kika in the lounge area on the main deck.

"I love you." I hear Carlos quietly says to Soph while looking at her lips. She was in a half-lying position in his arms. I was scrolling through my phone across from them but I couldn't help but look at them out of the corner of my eye.

"I love you." Sophie smiles and gently kisses him. My eyes got watery at the sight of them. My heart hurt a little and for a second I wished I had what they have. I wasn't envious of them, not at all, I was actually very happy for them and for the first "I love you". But for a second the excitement about the single life passed me and looking at the couples I felt a little lonely.

I get up from the couch and head towards the back of the yacht were was the entrance to the inner part of the yacht. I lean my elbows on the fence and look down at the sea.

Did I make a good decision?

Should i have given us another chance?

Will i regret giving up on us?

Suddenly questions that I constantly avoid facing start to roll around in my head.

No! Of course I made a good decision, he doesn't deserve another chance and I'm not gonna regret anything!

I attribute those thoughts to the excessive amount of alcohol I've consumed since we got here.

Y/n, you were miserable with him, pull yourself together please, you are stronger than these thoughts. I say to myself, but one tear escapes from my eye. And then another one. And one after that.

"Shit.." I breathe out putting my palms over my eyes.

"What happened, Y/n?" A voice asks and it startles me.

"Oh, you scared me." I say looking at Charles standing beside me, but quickly look away wiping the tears from my cheeks.

"Why are you crying?" Charles asks looking at me.

"Too many drinks led me to a moment of weakness. That's all." I say not really wanting to talk to him about my emotional state.

"And what is the reason behind that moment of weakness?" He asks.

"I don't feel like talking about it, but I was wondering how long have you and Ava been together?" I suddenly blurt out turning to look at him. My mind is racing. I was curious about their fight because the way he looked at her, he seemed like he's really in love, but her, not so much according to my estimate.

"A year and a half now. Why do you ask?"

"Sweet. And why did you fight today?" I ask shamelessly and he rises his eyebrows at my question.

"Not that it's any of your business, but-" Just as he was about to say something a strong pain shoots through my stomach. Rocking of the yacht from the waves together with cranberry vodka and sangria equals nausea.

"Oh no.. I-I think I'm gonna throw up.." And just in that moment as I lean over the fence it starts shooting right out of me.

I was hoping that somehow I would be able to control myself and not throw up in front of him, but it was stronger than me. And honestly if I were sober, I would be ten times more embarrassed than I am now.

"Oh come on." He sighs and to my surprise he moves my hair out of my face holding it back. "Please don't fall over, I'm not jumping in for you."

"Oh my God, I'm gonna die.."

"Out of embarrassment? Yeah, I would too if I were you." Charles mocks me, but still holds my hair.

"Oh give me a break, I'm going through a breakup!" I manage to say bitterly because of his lack of understanding for me. As if he should understand me. he doesn't know anything about me except my name, and I don't know anything about him either except that his name is Charles and that he has a girlfriend with whom he had a not so pretty fight today.

"Did he leave you because you were a drunk?" He continues with his provocation.

"Ha ha, not that it's any of your business, but I broke up with him." I'm being sassy like I didn't just throw up in front of a rich and hot F1 driver, but in that moment that fact doesn't phase me one bit.

"Okay, if you say so." He laughs. "Come here, sit on this couch please." I can't help but notice his hand tightly being wrapped around my waist as he leads me to the couch. "Not that I care, but I'm so bored that I'll listen to why you broke up with your boyfriend."

"Well, now I'm not gonna tell you." I cross my arms acting childish making him laugh again. I roll my eyes and chuckle a little myself.

"Y/n? Where are you?" Right in that moment Sophie shows up breaking the sweet moment between the two of us.

"Your friend is running wild over here, she wanted to throw herself off the yacht because her boyfriend left her." Charles says getting up from the couch and my mouth falls open.

"What?!" Sophie's eyes go wide. "Throw yourself because of him? Are you out of your fucking mind?" She asks in complete shock.

Before saying anything to Sophie to calm her down I follow Charles with my eyes as he leaves laughing.

"He's lying of course, I got sick from the alcohol and threw up."

"Why is he suddenly being all smiley like that? Until a little while ago he was furious because of Ava?"

"I don't know, he obviously has issues." I shrug with my shoulders wanting to laugh but manage to control myself.

I'm usually very good at reading people at first glance. Whoever doesn't make a good impression on me in the beginning, whoever doesn't sit well with me, almost always turns out to not have the best personality. Unfortunately, it rarely happens that someone pleasantly surprises me if I don't like them at first. I could say that my intuition is very good and accurate and I really should listen to it more often.

But with Charles that wasn't the case. I couldn't read him at all. He's kinda mysterious, he seems a bit cocky and conceited, but gentle and caring at moments. At least that's what I think I got from today.

He's interesting though.

Part 2 here

[mint-yooxgi]

Control - Yandere!Incubus!Jisung

Yandere AU & Incubus AU - First Person POV

Genre: Mature, Smutty Themes, Internal Monologue

Pairing: Jisung X Implied Chubby!Fem!Reader

Words: 1,658

Warnings: Violent thoughts at one point and implied murder, very smutty themes (he's essentially in the middle of the act with you while this is going on hehe). Mentions of potential kidnapping, but nothing comes of it. This is a Yandere story, it will contain themes such as stalking, violence, obsession, possessive natures, and just general overall creepiness and swearing. You have been warned.

A/n: I'M BACK BABEEEYYYYYYYY!!!! Lmaoo it's been forever since I've posted anything, or at least, it feels that way, so I hope this can satiate you all for a bit. Things have been a bit slow, but I'm feeling good about this one, better than I have been with my writing for a while. Anyways, Feedback is greatly appreciated! Enjoy!~

The Tenth of The Feral Drabbles

You don’t know how long I’ve been dreaming about this… to complete ravage you and claim you as my own.

A blissful sigh escapes my lips as I look down upon the wondrous sight that is you, naked and spread out beneath me. Months of meticulous planning have finally all come to a head as I run my hands up your sides, caressing your body like I’ve always dreamed.

Finally, you are mine, just as I’ve always been yours.

Long since have I been watching you, keeping an eye out for anything and everything that might spark an interest for me in you. You see, my sort of clientele deserve a certain… care when I decide to take them on. The seduction is all part of the thrill of the game.

But you? Oh, you?

You are most certainly not a game. No… You are everything I’ve ever desired, and so much more…

All of the others were easy to figure out, some flowers here, some compliments there, and poof, I had them right where I wanted them. Yet, you made me work for it. You made me earn it, and by the time I did, I could never hope to accept anybody else but you.

You are now my sole desire in this godforsaken universe. The only one I will ever want. The only one I will ever need.

You see, Darlin’, you have this smile… A smile that just lights up the entire room whenever its radiance graces your features. It’s brilliant, and the first time I ever saw it, I was captivated. The way your eyes crinkle during such an expression of joy set my heart racing. An odd, and rather foreign feeling, as I’ve never experienced anything quite like it before.

I had to have it for myself.

Sure, there’s been other times where my clients have smiled at me - smugly, flirtatiously, genuinely - but none of them were you. You have a certain charm that’s addicting, and I couldn’t help but wonder what that smile would look like gracing your features because of me.

I wanted to make you laugh. I wanted to make you happy. More than all of that, though, I wanted to know what that smile would look like pulling at your features as you gazed down upon me, my tongue buried in that tight, wet heat of yours. Perhaps, even what it would look like as I intertwined our fingers together, hearing you sigh in bliss, begging me for more as I made you come over, and over, and over again. For me, and me alone.

That smile would become a product of my love for you, in whatever ways it could. Soon, it would be only reserved for me, and not that fucking coworker of yours that seemed overtly friendly with you. They really enjoyed cracking jokes, didn’t they? Not so funny when it’s their skull cracking instead…

But, I digress… what I had to do to ensure you fell into my arms after all this time is my own business. You don’t ever have to worry about a single thing.

You even seemed to have a soft spot for animals, so it became nothing for me to start walking the dogs under our care just as an excuse to see you. They love you, almost as much as I do, you know. They know you’re mine, and they’ll protect you, and care for you almost as fiercely as I will now. They know that no one is allowed to touch you but me. We have to protect such a delicate being, after all.

Gentle… you’re always so gentle…

But you have a dominant streak in you, don’t you, Darlin’? You enjoy taking control, especially earlier in the night when I had you in my lap. 

Fuck- just thinking about those plush thighs around me as your hips shifted above my own has me twitching again in anticipation. I can’t get the feeling of your hands off of my skin, your fingertips having burnt trails of passion all over my shoulders as you attempted to ground yourself by holding onto me. I can still see the way your head tossed back in bliss, your movements stuttering as you came just from the friction alone.

You don’t need to be embarrassed. I came, too. I always come, even just to the mere thought of you.

That’s just the effect you have on me.

Oh, but I let you have your fun. I let you take control, and was it ever a sight to behold. To be able to indulge with you in these desires of yours has filled me with no greater joy. Seeing you take control like that…

I was made for you, Darlin’, and you were made for me. Never shall we be parted again. I won’t allow it. You are mine, and I am yours. Now, until forever.

The shock on your face after I told you that it was now ‘my turn’, well… it still has such a warmth building in my chest. It made me think, though, that perhaps you’re not used to receiving the love you deserve. I’ll deal with those other fools that dared make you believe you weren’t worth the same love and care you show them later. Right now, I want to focus on you.

Oh, the way my body comes alive at the feeling of your hands all over me. Every stuttered breath, every whimpered moan, is yours. Your name is made to fall from my lips, as mine is made to be graced by yours. You should know, all of my reactions are of the purest variety I can offer, for you and you alone.

I just hope you will do the same, and from the way your eyelids continue to flutter in bliss, I can tell this will be the case.

That’s it, Darlin’, feel my hands caressing every part of you. Let your body come alight beneath my touch, squirming and begging for more.

I will give it to you. I will always give it to you. Right now, though, I want to take my time.

To think, someone who’s always prided himself on his professionalism could be reduced to mere tatters at the very thought of you. For too long I have been fantasizing about what I would do to you if given the chance - an occupational hazard, if I do say so myself - but never have I ever felt anything this intense.

My life is yours, Darlin’. You own my very soul. Every breath, every thought, every desire I have is yours. Yours to fulfill, yours to own, yours to keep. It always and forever will be.

Yes, feel my lips against your skin, feel the way my tongue darts out to taste your pulse. This racing heart, that hitch in your breath, are all because of me.

I’ve only just begun…

Let my fingers trace over ever dip, let my hands map out every curve. I want to find all the spots on your body that have you gasping, and then I want to make you tremble from the slightest of my touches. Let me please you in all of the ways I know how, in all of the ways that I am known for.

Darlin’, you know my horns are sensitive…

Oh, but you did that on purpose, didn’t you? Your playful giggle says it all. You still want to be in control…

Just relax, Darlin’. Let me take care of you.

The hitch in your breath as you see my fangs only makes my cock ache for you that much more. And that full body shudder at my nails grazing your sides? Perfection.

My breath hitches. You- you’re begging for me? You want me?

Who am I to deny the most beautiful divinity I have ever had the pleasure to lay my eyes upon.

Don’t be shy now, Darlin’. You asked for it.

Just look at the way my fingers sink into those luscious thighs of yours. Fuck- you really are made for me… and this gorgeous, weeping cunt… is this all for me?

All because of me? Darlin’, you shouldn’t have! You know how insatiable you make me.

I swear, you were created just to tempt me. To make me succumb to the deepest of desires so I could please you to the fullest extent of my own abilities. Every lick, every suck, is for you, and I can never get enough of this sweet nectar that flows from your very core, intoxicating me with just a single taste.

Give it to me. 

I want your everything.

You like when I growl against this pretty pussy, don’t you, Darlin’? Well, what if I pull you closer and do it again? Oh, that made you clench around my tongue, didn’t it?

Do it again…

Again…

More…

More! Give me more!

Feed this beast inside of me who yearns for you! 

Yes! Give your all to me! 

Let me see you fall apart on my tongue…

That’s it, Darlin’, feel the way I suckle this sensitive little clit between my lips. Moan for me as I let my tongue delve through those soft, wet folds of yours. Make me drunk on you, and then make it so I can never dream of wanting another. Only you.

I’ll let you in on a little secret… you already do.

Such a luscious body, Darlin’, and all mine to hold. All mine to touch, to please, to sink my fangs into and mark you as mine over, and over, and over again.

That right, grab onto my horns, pull me in closer as your thighs shake around my head. Don’t fucking stop until you’ve taken everything you’ve wanted from me, and then some. 

My body was made to please you. 

That is truly my greatest desire.

After all, Darlin’, you’re the one that’s still in control.

[queenie-avenue]

i think a cupid just shot my heart as i read abt yan! barista!! I have a what if, where reader was pressured by their friends egging them to find someone that they made a slip of tongue and accidentally claimed and said they found someone, resulting in havoc in the group chat with their friends bombarding them with questions abt the newly found someone that reader actually doesnt have

and planning a meet-up asap the next day for readers friends to meet the someone

Soooo she runs off to Minoru asking a favor for him to be their *pretend* boyfriend for the meet-up or perhaps until he manages to woo reader into making him their real lover

Fake it till you make it.

💌 ⤻ THE BARISTA, AKIMITSU MINORU

—> helping you, but you didn't want it.

⤻ reader is gender neutral, implied stalking (but let's be fr, he did stalk), non-consensual kissing, fake-dating technically, mentions of arctic monkeys because I was playing it on spotify lol

notes: oh my god anon, i love you so much. i was actually so sad when there wasn't much interaction with the yandere barista and i'm so glad you liked it! i hope you like this! mwah! <333

💌 ⤻ archives.

You only had one friend group, which you always took pride in. As you said, it wasn't the quantity of friends you had, but rather the quality of the people you surround yourself with. Despite their flaws, you did think that your friends were a swell group of people who simply wanted the best for you.

However, it was a problem right now because you only had one friend group, nobody else could masquerade as your boyfriend to your other friends.

You could barely sleep last night as they bombarded you with questions, asking you about your supposed lover and how the both of you met and an impromptu scheduling of your friends meeting you and your boyfriend.

You suggested neko no aishi for some reason as you thought of who would be able to be your ideal boyfriend, someone you and your friends would approve of.

Your cheeks flushed as you thought of the barista manning the counter everyday.

You shook your head as you decided that you would be a good person and fess up to your friends.

✧ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ✧

“That's basically what happened.” You muttered as you grabbed your cup of coffee from Minoru's hands, looking up at him with the most pathetic expression you had ever shown him.

He chuckled softly. “You know,” he started as he always did, “being single is not a really big deal. You have your entire life to find the one you love.” He said as he looked you up and down. “It doesn't need to be now.” He said as he leaned across the counter, getting extremely close to you, an innocent smirk on his face.

“Yeah, I know. But I feel like I'll never find the one.” You muttered. “All my dates have ended in disaster, somehow. Just the other week, one of the guys vomited when we were walking around the street. He hadn't even eaten anything. I'm starting to think it's my perfume.” You said, attempting to make the sad situation at least somewhat funny.

“I think your perfume is just right.” Minoru said, barely above a whispered as his hands tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.

You flushed the deepest shade of red as his black eyes raked all over yours.

He wasn't wearing his contact lenses today, you noted, sipping your cup of coffee.

“Why not I pretend to be your boyfriend?”

The statement had caused you to sputter out your drink, staining your skin brown as you looked up at him with wide eyes.

“I mean, it would be quite easy.” He chuckled. “I've been a boyfriend before.” He humoured you.

“I couldn't possibly expect that of you. Plus, you have so many things to do around here. And well, I can't keep lying to my friends that you're my boyfriend, can I?” You said as you moved away from the counter, just in time so you did not hear his, ‘it doesn't need to be a lie’.

When your friends arrive, you puff out your chest and get ready to tell them the truth as they question you about the whereabouts of your rumoured boyfriend.

Just as you were about to speak, a tray was placed in front of your friends, all with adorably decorated lattes that had the signature cat of the café plastered on. “Sorry I'm late,” Minoru smiled sheepishly as he served your friends. “I was preparing some drinks for all of you.” He smiled as he took a seat next to you, wrapping his hands around your delicate waist, pulling you in as you gasped. You shot him a look, eyes widening at just what he was trying to do.

“Is he really your boyfriend?” One of your friends quipped, just as shocked as you were at this sudden development.

“Yep.” He smiled, bowing to them respectfully before turning to face you, his dark eyes boring into you. “[y/n] told me so much about all of you. I’m so happy to meet you guys.” He chuckled, acting like the perfect boyfriend that all of your friends would approve of.

“Oh is that an arctic monkeys keychain?” He asked as he began to initiate conversation with all your friends, surprisingly good at being able to pick up about what they all liked.

You couldn’t tell if he was just that good, or if he been doing research.

That was a stupid thought. How could he even do that?

“Well, I have to head back to work, but enjoy the coffee. It’s all on me.” He said as he leaned close to you. “See you later, dear.” He smiled before pressing a chaste kiss to your lips, that left you even more dumbfounded. You savoured the taste of mint chapstick on Minoru’s lips, how his lips matched yours perfectly, how you felt his lips quirk up when he realised you weren’t doing anything to deny him of your lips. He pulled away, his thumb grazing his lips with a grin. Hus thumb was somehow warmer than his lips, or was that just you? Your cheeks heated up as he even wiped the stain of coffee from your lips.

Your friends squealed the moment he left, complimenting your ‘boyfriend’. You practically went with the flow as you felt dizzy, still confused about the kiss.

✧ Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ✧

“Why did you do that?” You questioned, practically gasping for air, still breathless after that kiss.

“I wanted to help you.” He said as he closed up the cafe casually as you remained red-faced and anxious.

“You didn’t need to, I already told you that I didn’t want to bother you.”

Minoru led you out as he locked the cafe for the day. “It wasn’t a bother. Trust me.” He smiled before leaning back down to give you another kiss, this time more sensual as he bit your lip before fully letting you go.

“Get home safe.” He smiled, leaving you there in the middle of the street and smouldering afternoon heat.

Soon, that fake boyfriend thing would not be so fake after all. He planned on it.

[sgiandubh]

@outlanderskin :"For those who have doubts: just research a little about Caitríona's dating history. See how she treated Dave and James and how she talked about them in interviews. See how she wrote about the Irish boyfriend she had in Paris in that article. Compare all of this to the impersonal way she treats or talks about Tony. Bingo🙃"

Good point 👌

Dear Good Point Anon,

You know, it's really serendipitous, as I have just finished a weeklong deep dive in very, very old press articles on (or at least mentioning) S and C, who clearly had a life before OL, thinking it would be nice to put some of my archive work skills to good service.

I think @outlanderskin was referring to C's New York Times article I reviewed and analyzed last summer, but I just found way better: a very long report in the Irish Independent's Sunday issue of July 11, 2004, focused on the next generation of Irish supermodels. Of which there could be only one, at that time: C, who dominates Roxanne Parker's 'Through Thick and Thin".

I am sorry, there is no link available to my knowledge, so we'll have to work with these very poor xerox scans:

I took the liberty of generously using my dreaded highlighter and, for the people who need to translate this post with Google, I am now taking my time to type what I find damn interesting in this almost twenty-year old article:

'If Ireland ever has a hope of having its own supermodel, then Caitriona Balfe is it. Sitting in the Pink Pony Café on Ludlow Street in New York, Caitriona swirls a wad of bread into her carrot and coriander soup while informing me that her musician boyfriend just brought her a breakfast-in-bed of cream eclairs and coffee a little over an hour ago. But that doesn't stop Caitriona from finishing her lunch and chasing it with a large cocoa-dusted cappuccino. Ebony-tressed and ivory-skinned, Caitriona clip-clops down the cobbled street after we leave the cafe, heading towards her apartment in Chinatown with Dave Mailone (sic!), the boyfriend, in tow.'

This reads, in 2024, like an interview with a more benevolent C clone from a totally different planet, indeed. A young, carefree, in love and hysterically funny C, who apparently had no problem heavily dishing out happy tidbits of her private life to her home country's press. A C also very much reminiscing anyone with a brain of the 2013-2018 bantering C, as this quote shows:

Again, you'll have to indulge me retyping it, Anon (tedious, I know - but helpful). She is remembering her real breakthrough, in November 2002, at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, in New York:

That was the most I've ever been paid for a show. I've got 18,000 euros for one day's work! They made me get a spray tan before the show, and I was still the whitest and the least well-endowed girl in the entire show! So what did she have to wear on the big day? `Not a whole lot! I think I described my outfit on the day as something Wilma Flintstone would wear on her honeymoon night. There wasn't a whole lot to it and it had bits of fur hanging off it.'

And, for good measure, we even have a (admittedly, awful) picture with the season's fiancé, with whom things did not end well:

I know, it looks like a Pravda pic, circa 1957 and I am honestly sorry. But it's still very clear. And, which is more important, very eloquent.

Anon and reader, you draw your own conclusions on this. I know where I stand. The only guy C has similar pics taken with and released in the press or on social media is the peasant some love to bash every single day in here. Their problem, not mine.

Yes, of course Mordor will yell and hiss. Of course they will throw rotten tomatoes at the blunt knife and scream THIS IS OLD. But hey, do you have any better than this poor (but oh, so endearingly authentic) picture or than any given S&C pic before the fucking EFH and IFH, when she gradually started to turn into today's Reclusive, Restrained and Rarefied Greta Garbo wannabe?

Oh, and please: don't give me the 'he's shy' or the paperwork crap again. Her public persona has drastically changed, and not for the better. It's plain to see and there are reasons for this.

Who's to blame? This question is so wrong, in so many ways.

The question should be 'what's to blame?'

I'll stop here, Anon and I hope it was somewhat useful. Thank you for dropping by.

[lightningant]

I've never seen characterizations of Tom and Harry the way yours is. I love how neurotic and messed up they both are -- they're *SO CUTE* too. <3 <3 <3

Tom is just so exhausted and cynical and Harry is a manic catastrophe with sooo many crossed wires and they're HILARIOUS. XD

And just so well written, I cannot tell you how distracted I was for at least a week after I read what you had for your fic -- I truly, truly admire your narration and dialogue and characterizations (I already said that but PLEASE I LOVE THEM SO **BAD** >O< ) Soooo funny and well made.

They're realistic! Tom and Harry are so messy and also normal people at the end of the day who make mistakes and aren't super cool all the time (really, they're utter dorks, and you TOTALLY show thatt) but also they're competent and scary and stubborn and you just have suchh a nice blend of their facets and I JUST....aghhh, I love itt.

Also I ADORE your designs -- I love how Tom is so sickly and neat (you said it best "Victorian child with tuberculosis" LMAO), and Harry is so IDK, he's just a Guy but in the most wonderful way -- I'm not actually good with words :,))))

I just love your art style in general, it's like, realistic yknow. You don't get rid of normal people "imperfections", they're a part of the design or enhance them -- I don't think the word imperfections is right, I just mean like, you don't exclude non-conventionally attractive aspects of bodies or facial expressions??? Idk, I'm trying here, I really am. Just, just, just I like it a lot and I wanna be like that toooooo >.<

IIIIIIII dunno if I have accurately gotten anything across or even given an actual good compliment in this entire thing but anyways you're very cool and awesome and also PLEASE forget that I said they were Babygirl I've never used that word before in my LIFEE and don't know if that was right at all -- if it was nevermind I meant it all and am so cool -- ANYWAYS bye :,)

I don't think I've succeeded in lessening my embarrassment but uhhhhh, I hope I've at least articulated myself better :,)))

Askbomb swag. Thank you, this message was so sweet :) I shall try to match energies.

One of the things I love most is that the kind of person who puts up pretensions is, innately, trying to hide something about themselves they find sub-par. Tom isn't just a scary and incredibly powerful domineering sigma male who is a master manipulator, he is a person who is actively attempting to turn himself into that man, and in my fic he is still a teenager and still tripping his way through that mental image he has of himself. The two worst ages to ever be are 15 and 20; fifteen, when you are ready to shed childhood but don't know what maturity looks like just yet, and 20, when you are ready to become your own person and achieve adulthood, picking your way across existence-defining beliefs. And his only friend for the past like, 7 months? has been his 16-year-old self who has the single-minded objective of looking cool and mature to his adult self. A hell of his own making.

Harry is also 20. He is one of those 'unusually mature for his age' kids and he has an inflated sense of his own righteousness and capability, despite being the actual one with the emotional range of a teaspoon (he just knows to keep it himself). There is no way Harry would detect he is having a manic fit, especially if he is having one that is triggered by his arrested feelings on Sirius. It's incredibly fun writing him perform this extremely risky and reality-altering plan and his plan was "idk, kill him?" and picking shit up off the ground whenever he sees it, the DADA position included. our hero.

Beautiful tragic terminally ill gothic prince / fit jock is really a match made in heaven aesthetically. Cannot get enough of it

Thank you for art compliment too ^_^ I used to lean more to anime fandoms so Harry Potter really let me stretch my legs on more 'normal people' facial features like big noses and soft chins and I'm glad it's clear how much fun I'm having doing that. Yay! Though one of the compliments I've always gotten that I've always been proud of is how distinct the way I draw expressions is.

No no...you're right. Tom is absolutely a babygirl. And Harry...well he was certainly Ginny's babygirl, and I'm sure a part of him is really itching to have someone put their hand on the small of his back 😔

[kyriat-stories]

- ... and then she spat the polenta straight into my face, and giggled!

Noor was sharing the adventures of trying to give her newest grandchild, little Simadhne, solid food.

- Like mother like daughter, Eira said, because I remember Areth doing exactly the same a long time ago.

- Well, to my defense, I don't like polenta, Areth tried to say.

- You ungrateful child, Noor laughed. Little Simadhne will teach you a lesson or two about the injustice of the world, I'm sure. Now hush off and get your vegetables so I can have a private talk with your auntie.

- She will become a wonderful mother, Eira commented. She is so much like you. It must be wonderful to have her so close.

- Yes, things have turned out so well for our family. I'm really happy for her. How are things with Khara? Any hope for a grandchild?

- Not that I know of, but you know, it's still early, they just got married.

- Do you think they might stay? Or do you think she will follow Samuel back to Kastanea?

- I don't know. Samuel is now the rightful owner of Kyria Figélia's house, but he will still need to work. They can't live on his savings forever. So I am a bit worried.

- And Bansabira, any news there?

- Nope, still single and living at home. She is filling her days with artwork and studies, but she needs a family. I've suggested a few candidates, but she is not interested. I worry about her.

- Hmmm.

- Is that what our lives going to be from now on Noor? Worrying constantly about our children? Even as grown ups?

- Probably, Noor laughed. But at least Areth and Phaidros are doing well and are both married with children now. Tychon is still living at home, but he is surprisingly popular with the ladies, despite the fact that he is a real slob. I honestly don't understand what they see in him, but I will not be surprised if he gets married early. And he has a good job in construction, so he will be all right.

- And Myrto?

- Oh Myrto, my little heart. Eira, she is really special. Of course they all are, but she is one of a kind. So lighthearted, so funny and quick-witted. Still innocent, yet open to the world. She reminds me of myself at her age. She is a dreamer, but she is still young, she will be fine. I hope. At least at the moment I'm not worried about her. But...

- But what?

- Honestly, I am really worried about Teo and Mpatíni. I can't put my finger on it, but there is something going on between them.

- We've all experienced some marital disagreements, don't you think it will pass?

- No, this is not a simple marital quarrel. The don't talk, they seem to avoid each other. It's been developing over years now. Ever since Iliouloùsta came to us, but I don't believe it has to do with her. They both seem to love her very much. We all do.

- Whatever it is, there is not much we can do about it, is there? They will have to work it out for themselves.

- You are right of course. I'm just sad to see them so unhappy.

- What about you Noor, are you happy?

- Me? Yes of course! What kind of question is that?

- I mean, we've been talking about our children back and forth now, but what about you, are you happy with your life?

- What do you mean? Why shouldn't I be happy? All my children are doing well, well most of time anyway, so...?

- Yes I know, but what about your life? Do you feel satisfied with what you have achieved? Do you think life is worth living?

- Eira, you always complicate things! Of course life is worth living, what a silly thing to say! I'm fine, the family is fine, you are fine. It's just small worries. It's normal. Hey, wait! Are you not feeling well? Is there something wrong with you that you are not telling me?

- No, no, I'm okay. It's just... Well sometimes I feel that something is missing in my life. Never mind, maybe it will be better if I get grandchildren. Something to focus on. At least Polykarpos is dating

- Oh is he now?

- Yes there seems to be a new girl every week, so I don't know if he will settle down or anything like that. We will just have to wait and see. I had hopes for Khara and Samuel, but...

- What about Yousif?

- Yousif? Kyrios Eláïom? What about him?

- Are there any news?

- No, he is still in Kastanea according to Samuel. I don't think he will ever come back here. The long journey... And he is not a young man after all.

- You miss him.

- Miss him? I really don't... Okay he is a nice man, and I miss the conversations.

- Eira, surely it must be allowed to admit that you like him? Even if you're well into adulthood, it's okay to fall in love, isn't it?

- No, my goddess, in love?! Ugh, how embarrassing. That's for young people. Stop teasing me.

- I'm not teasing. You are in love, you miss him and you want him in your life. That's why you are asking all these silly question about life worth living and such high-flying philosophical stuff. Be honest! If not with me, so at least with yourself!

- Don't be silly!

- Just think about it. Send him a message! Maybe he feels the same? Maybe he will give up everything in Kastanea just to be with you?

- Oh Noor, you are such a romantic dreamer. That will never happen.

- Sister, have a little faith. Contact him. What is there to loose?

- I'm just realistic.

- More like fatalistic.

- Look! There is Kyria Anaktoría! Let's say hello!

- The fact that you are avoiding the topic proves my point.

- Phff..

.

Previous (Chapter 11) | Index | Character overview | Next

[oneatlatime]

Appa's Lost Days

Dare I hope?

You know, if ten year old me had turned on my TV to watch my weekly dose of Avatar and been greeted with a nearly two minute long uninterrupted sequence of a frightened and distressed animal being mistreated, that TV would have turned right back off again.

I don't buy that a ten tonne bison who has the leverage of his own weight as well as his airbending abilities would succumb to so few people.

Name one other character that Avatar has presented as so thoroughly without any redeeming characteristics. Even Zhao was at least kind of funny. Everything about the chucklehead on the left is rotten to the core. "What's your dad going to do when he finds out we broke his stuff while doing crime?" "Nothing. It's not his stuff; it's previous crime."

I thought beetle-headed was a commentary on their intelligence, but it's actually a description.

I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that I should have waited to get my hopes up until I came to an episode called Appa's Found Days. Is this whole thing going to be a series of near misses with the Gaang?

You know, if I had a nickel for every time an animal companion on this show has been threatened with a trip to the butcher's, I'd have two nickels. In the space of two episodes.

This is not fun to watch guys.

Not if I break you first asshole.

The way this Nurse Ratched type circus guy says "earn it" is chilling.

Of course the Fire Nation would find a way to turn bending into animal abuse. Of course.

a) that cage is way too small b) who knew cabbage suction could be so cute?

Completely unsubtle parallel with the boy here, right down to the complete disregard they show to the threats thrown their way.

Stubborn and wilful are not adjectives I would use to describe Appa this episode, or ever.

Wind buffalo. Wind Buffalo. Really? Was Fart Cow taken?

That's a very relatable facial expression.

That makeup and costume is awful.

Now that's satisfying.

Is the Fire Nation kid voiced by Aang's voice actor?

Nevermind. THAT'S satisfying.

I was right - this episode is Appa always being a step behind the Gaang.

Baby Appas! This almost makes this episode worth it!

It's funny how a single feature can contribute so much to a character's design. Arrowless Aang is just some kid. Let me rephrase that, since such a big part of Aang's character is the fact that he's just some goofy kid. Arrowless Aang is indistinguishable from other kids for the first time this series, because every other time we've seen him on screen he's either the only child airbender with his arrows, or the only airbender left.

Lady monks. Nuns? I don't think I've seen those before.

Appa and Aang share a dreamscape? That could be useful.

There's dumb, there's really dumb, and then there's 'wake a completely asleep and therefore harmless unknown creature with threats of violence' dumb.

Close call for Iroh. Do you think he's suspected that Appa (and presumably the Avatar) haven been in Ba Sing Se this whole time?

Bipedal Appa is strange. A very effective fighter, but strange to look at.

I'm amazed that giant boar thing walked away from that.

And now they're hitting me with an 'Appa's given Up' montage. Someone who works on this show hates me.

*Heroically refrains from ranting about the impracticality of using white fabric for an active warrior's glove.*

"This could be our most important mission yet." Foreshadowing?

Did Suki and Appa actually meet at any point in the Warriors of Kyoshi episode?

Turns out 'Aang' is a magic word.

Appa kisses!

Appa is apparently legally banned from having anything good for more than five minutes. Although it's good writing that they're using a previously established weakness - Appa's shedding - to bring the danger ladies back in.

I guess they have Azula drop the line about her brother to remind the audience of who she is, but surely Suki's like "Who are you? Who's your brother? Why should I care?"

Azula going after the Kyoshi warriors is completely unnecessary right? The Avatar isn't there. Neither are Zuko and Iroh. It doesn't even net her Appa. She's just looking for someone to beat up.

WOW this is bad writing. Like really bad. My Immortal levels of bad.

Would it be too much to ask for the Kyoshi warriors to do even slightly ok against the Azula ladies? Couldn't they at least get a couple of hits in?

Kudos to Suki for essentially sacrificing herself and her warriors to save Appa. 'Most important mission yet' was a bit on the nose.

Out of options, Appa goes home. Ouch.

Someone explain this to me. Air Bison teething ring?

My what a human sounding cough you have buddy.

This is why you don't use Air Bison as guard dogs.

I like what this Guru is saying. Fear displacing trust but not love feels more accurate than how I usually see the consequences of trauma discussed.

The music playing throughout this sequence fits so well. I think it's some sort of metal thing you hit - I want to say a variation on tubular bells, and maybe something Glockenspiel adjacent? It's unlike anything I've heard in this show before and it fits so well that I'm nerding out a bit.

Disney princess Guru. Aang has Disney princess moments too. Maybe it's an Air Nomad thing?

No wonder the monks built a temple here. Even destroyed, it's gorgeous.

And Appa decides to trust again. I love it when an animal visibly comes to a decision about your trustworthiness.

This energy reading stuff makes sense given that Aang and Appa already share a dreamscape.

He IS a great beast. The best!

OH COME ON

Someone whip up a wanted poster for Long Feng: Cattle Rustler. It had also never occurred to me that he was an earthbender.

That flip move with the earthbending platform must have caused Appa to land on his back. I bet that hurt.

One of the times I am very grateful that the closing credits music is so upbeat.

Final Thoughts

@aboutiroh I see why you recommended I save my chocolate for this episode.

The Tale of Momo was really just a preparatory taste of things to come, huh? Almost a microcosm of this episode.

This is the first episode where I had to take breaks while watching. Especially the circus sequence, I think I got up twice to do things like get a cup of tea and stare randomly out windows at squirrels. I didn't even have to do that with Zuko Alone, despite freaking out a lot about it, because at least that episode took breaks from the child abuse to check in with Aang being miserable. This episode was unrelenting.

If I had seen this episode when I was the age of the target audience, this may well have turned me off the show for good. If my Mom had seen this episode, I would have been banned from watching the show entirely. Not a decision I'd agree with, but my Mom is the type of person who banned her kids from watching Bambi.

To watch through all of that unrelenting animal (at best) unhappiness, and still not get Appa back at the end of the episode? That's a bit much. It's not often that this show ends its episodes without at least a little bit of something positive.

Once again, the music did a lot of heavy lifting this episode. The animal noises weren't quite as emotive as the ones in Momo's Tale, but Appa's face is more expressive, and more was shown through his expression than through Momo's, so I feel like this episode had just as much non-verbal animal communication as Momo's Tale.

I think I'm renaming season 2 "the Suki redemption arc." I really didn't like the Warriors of Kyoshi episode, and I didn't like what her character did in that episode. But every time Suki appears in season 2? She absolutely nails it.

The show since losing Appa has taken to wallowing. Even with bright spots like the poetry bouncer, the overall tone since Appa's appanapping has been ever more dark. If this keeps up for many more episodes, it will no longer be fun to watch.

Somehow I don't think this one is going on my rewatch list.

[aachria]

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH hi how are you!

I was rereading SSSBMTY for like the 10th time and Ive been dying to know that if Robin is really the only one who knows that Ed died somehow because bestie told her- but like did Robin take that seriously?? Did Robin hear “oh yeah I was the only one who died teehee” and took it in a “mental death” or a “physical death” way. If she took it in a mental perspective which I guess makes the most since does Robin realize the implications of Ed “dying” and somewhere in her head is super worried for Ed?

Some people in the story know about the “Buster Call” that TOTALLY (didn’t) happened but we’ve only really seen Robin, Zoro and Nami question it… I guess kinda Law with him comparing a Robin and Ed but not intense questioning. and now that Ed has done their screaming match with Kidd does Kidd and/or Killer have any suspicions of what they actually meant by being so connected to death???

AHHH ED YOUR KILLING ME NO PUN INTENDED?! I like death metaphors if you cannot tell- I want to squeeze you to get this information out.. is everyone just not questioning Ed’s weird background and possible death that they haven’t been super secret about?!?!

I wrote this while having a brain freeze bc of a smoothie

Reading SSSBMTY 10 times is crazy I hope you know that. I love you but I hope you know that.

When they're all on the Tower of Law Robin makes it clear she took it very metaphorical, like she interpreted that as Ed intentionally viewing the person they were before the 'Buster Call' as someone who was dead and gone and not who they were anymore. Honestly I think Robin took that and what Ed said after about them both belonging to the crew as Ed somehow just being better adjusted than her, which is fucking hilarious if you think about it.

I've always had the thought floating around that because Luffy got mad at Nami way back at the beginning when she tried to ask Ed about it she took that as 'no one ever ask Ed anything EVER' and has just instilled that idea whenever they get a new crewmate lmao. Like she sits them down and goes "Ok so Ed is weird and has terrible things in their past but Do Not Ask Questions if you think the dramatic violin music will start playing, ok?" even if that's Not the Case.

That isn't confirmed canon I'm just putting that out there. You gotta wait and see if I write that into the story lmao.

Tbh Zoro doesn't give a shit about whatever happened to Ed because he thinks they've got — if not a good handle on it — at least a decent ability to see help/comfort when they need to. His ass has seen them cope worse with things that actively happen around them then whatever was going on with the 'Buster call,' and is content to leave it alone unless Ed directly asks him for help. (Which is also very funny if you think about Ed's 'if you ask I will tell you EVERYTHING' policy.)

Now with Kid and Killer it's more so they have no idea what is up with this weird little guy but it seems like they've got some, uh, ISSUES with the people around them or they themselves being hurt/killed by someone with a dream and no regard for casualties. Wonder how that will develop if they hear about the 'Buster Call' thing or any other weird rumor they might have accidentally sent floating around.

Overall Ed speaks in weird backwards metaphors enough there's a chance no one has ever taken a single word they've said at face value, so.... yeah.

I hope your brain is ok xoxo

[panelshowsource]

now that s17 is over, how did you like it? it feels like most people either thought it was mild or weak, which makes me sad, so i stopped going to the discussion threads about it :""( i also don't see much anticipation for s18...

aww anon well, first, if you had a good time then that's what matters! so i hope series 17 brought you a little joy each week, that's what panel shows are for in my humble opinion 😚

because i know i'm about to word vomit some word salad, i'll throw out some s17 reactions + s18 thoughts below the cut! that way anyone who is sick of my nonsense doesn't have to scroll past it lmaooo

series 17 was a decent one! i don't think it's in the hall of fame, but it's definitely nowhere near the couple of "unwatchables" as they're (pretty unfairly) called. i've talked before about one of the downfalls of a season is when a group doesn't harness their dynamic and take control of the show — when they're in the studio and just sit quietly, waiting for greg to give them permission to speak, things flow well for the editors but the experience lacks. this is why s1, 2, 4, 5, 7, 9, even 12 are so silly and chaotic: the contestants were constantly fighting, interrupting or pausing judging, trying to convince or gaslight or challenge greg, just...speaking! talking! interacting! if that doesn't happen, taskmaster can just feel like show and tell, which is not when it's at its best

ultimately, this is why too many polite and well-behaved people in a single series is a pleasant watch but doesn't hit very hard. this series was exceptionally nice, we have to admit. joanne followed by steve may have been the "hang on a second ☝️" contestants of the series, but not by a lot, meanwhile nick and sophie were the loveliest, pretty quiet people and john was dead silent most of the time. actually, that was something that ended up surprising me — john was so focused on the tasks, so focused on winning, most of the time he didn't pause to give significant, funny commentary while filming, didn't give us *nearly* the banter with alex i anticipated, and was particularly quiet in the studio. i knew he'd be in it to win it, don't get me wrong, but he approached taskmaster more as a richard herring than an ed gamble, if you know what i mean. it was very funny to me when he was on the tm podcast and was more or less like "i know i didn't prioritise being entertaining" lmao that earnestness can be sweet, because i do like to watch the show imagining how i would do each task, but his ~no nonsense~ approach was turned up to 11 for a lot more of the series than i anticipated. i almost wish john had leaned a little more into his self-aware neuroticism and competitiveness just because that's generally a good character on taskmaster — and this series was definitely missing that

(you know, talking about this really reinforces my belief that kerry godliman is perhaps the most perfect taskmaster contestant...ever. competitive, no nonsense and full of nonsense, top bantz, stands up for herself and tears down others but fights without being genuinely angry or butthurt, doesn't know enough to try and figure out a workaround for every single task, loves and bullies alex in equal measure... just love the woman. love her. fuck it, same for jess knappett. i miss my girls😭 this is ALSO why i think rosie is a great fit for tm)

anywayz i haven't read mucho mucho discourse about series 17, but it wouldn't surprise me if that's the vague "criticism" people: just more lowkey vibes than other series. but some people prefer that, so..!!!

i think, too, too many people look back at series 1–...7? at least and want to see the same greg–alex dynamic, approach to the prize tasks, approach to scoring, lil tricks, what have you — and that is not gonna happen again. ever. for example, greg and alex have talked too many times about how hard they try to score things "fairly" because that's become such a big point of conversation for the viewers at home and, atp, even the contestants. personally, i don't prefer that. fuck fair! this is not a real competition it's an entertainment show!! when greg was throwing out points willy nilly, bonus points for eating hair, giving 5 points to a prize just bc it's his personal sense of humour and ranking another contestant's prize low every week just bc that's a funny recurring joke/dynamic, whatever. i do not care. give phil wang 1 point every time. points schmoints. but that cannot happen anymore because the viewers starting taking the points so darn seriously. (not to mention the opportunity to do coc is now pretty coveted for its $$$ and exposure, too, i'd imagine.) the same goes for greg leaning into his dictator role, the master/slave relationship between him and alex, alex being super stoic and quiet — not only does tm think those characters and dynamics are played out, but in some ways the audience has evolved beyond all that

my point is that people get caught up in the Old Gen Taskmaster that hooked them and can't accept the ways in which the show has evolved — even if it's in their opinion for worse. do i think it would kill taskmaster to go back to slightly less convoluted tasks and commit to the 1–5 point system instead of constant ties (or "this was a 3-point effort")? no. i would like to see that lmao but i don't view the series through the lens of a series 1 fan anymore, either. a reality check would help a lot of complainers

i did read one thing i thought was interesting — that with the huge number of series we're at with tm uk, and now the accessibility of other countries' spin-offs, there is a bigger and bigger pool of God Tier Taskmaster to compare each new series to. it used to be "hmm does this new series stack up against series 4, one of the all-time greats?" but now we're stacking new series up against the top ~6 of tm uk, tm nz s2, a couple of the tm belgiums, tm aus s1, and so on. competition is stiff!! not many series can be The Very Best Of All Time, so with each new tm uk that isn't, people start to feel like the show has gone downhill when it probably is stagnant at worst. does that make sense?

i don't wanna sound like every criticism of tm can be explained away or comes from a bad place. as i've mentioned above, i have my qualms. this series, one of my major qualms and seriously unpopular opinions was that i didn't like that steve wasn't actually bringing in prizes half the time. like, he was doing bits and they were funny bits, but greg was scoring him mad high for the effort he put into his bits instead of the actual prizes he brought in for entry. i stand by that opinion, but the thing is i didn't let that ruin my experience of the show. but, maybe, it just comes down to the fact i want to like it...so i do ^^

maybe i talked way too much about criticism and negativity hahah some things i really enjoyed from this series:

nick is probably the second person following john kearns who i actively disliked before taskmaster specifically because i had only ever seen their comedy characters doing dictionary corner or a bit of standup — and i really didn't like them. (still never seen ted lasso!) lo and behold, they go on taskmaster and are S Tier Sweethearts and i see them both in totally new lights! in fact john's last standup show is being released shortly and i cannot wait to watch it — which me of the past would never believe i'm saying lmao so i'm so grateful the show opened my eyes to what a funny, sweet person nick is!! and may i say his and john's styles in the studio are massively underrated. they are both incredibly snazzy dressers!

steve and nick were a sweet little team weren't they! i think it would have been funnier to have john x sophie (the best and the worst, in their own ways) vs. the more harmonious steve x nick x sophie, but regardless it was very cute stuff

the location was great! i fucking love a big open field, i fucking love a river

greg has had some really strong intro "speeches" the last few series and i loved his this time around. they're just equal parts stupid and weird + his authoritative, classic greg delivery always makes me laugh heh

some of the strongest live tasks in a while!! catching the little monsters, passing the loo through the tube, bouncing the ball on the bar — all felt like quintessential uncomplicated classic taskmaster parlour games and they were good fun

TONS out outtakes content!

and gosh it's wonderful to have a new little hour of pleasantness to have each week :)

regarding s18... it's an interesting lineup! in a good way!! i think rosie's character is more or less a perfect fit for the taskmaster format. obviously she is one of the biggest female comedians in the uk right now, but i didn't bet on her doing tm because i didn't think the show could commit to accommodating her disability for 10 episodes. and, frankly, they may not — and i guarantee she is completely okay with that. she was born from the rhod gilbert school of showing up to fuck around, and i sleep soundly knowing she will do just that. i really like jack dee and i'm happy for alex to have made it work with him. it typically wouldn't be my choice to have two senior comedian white men on one series, and (unpopularly?) i'm not really a zaltzman person, but i have no doubt he'll be quite charming. emma sidi is part of the alex horne bubble of friends i have mentioned a few times before, but i actually don't know much about her. babatunde feels like a sensible fresh pick since he's been doing more variety/panel shows; i don't watch him on googlebox (which i love) because i don't like mo gilligan (very unsorry about this opinion heh), but what i've seen of him i've enjoyed! i don't think the group's dynamic is obvious just from their list of names, but the fact they're all comedians is VERY promising and makes me supersupersuper happy — all comedian lineups are historically the strongest. so yay!! but can you imagine who will be on a team?? god imagine a jack x rosie team lmfaoooooooooooo i live for the thought

hope that made sense and if it didn't whoops! don't mind me heheh

[5starluvr]

Poison

Paring:Han jisung x reader

Genre:fluff,slight angst

Warnings:feeling unlovable,kissing,smoking

This is not really edited nor proof read since I wrote this last night .ALSO LISTEN TO THE SONG WHILE READING TRUST ME!!

Rain hammered against Han’s window, a relentless hammering against the glass that mirrored the frantic drumming of y/n’s heart. Smoke curled from the cigarette she held, her presence a question mark against the backdrop of his messy, familiar room. Han sprawled across his beanbag chair, watched her, concern etching lines on his forehead. He knew her too well. The vibrant spark in her eyes, usually dancing with mischief, was dimmed, replaced by a dull ache.

"Mr.Claus’ pop quiz was the least of my worries," she mumbled, flicking the ash into a chipped ashtray overflowing with cigarette butts. The air hung heavy with a mix of nicotine and emotions.

He sat up, mirroring her posture. "Don't lie to me, y/n. This isn't about a stupid quiz." His voice was gentle, laced with a quiet understanding.

A frustrated sigh escaped her lips, a sound that ripped through the charged silence. "It's stupid," she muttered, burying her face in her hands. "Everyone seems to be coupled up. Jeongin and that girl are practically living at each other's places, even Hyunjin found some Fashion school chick."

Han leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. "You know, being single isn't a disease, y/n," he said, a wry smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He knew that wasn't what she wanted to hear, but sometimes a little humor could break the tension.

She scoffed, a flicker of a smile playing on her lips. "Easy for you to say, Mr. Independent. You have girls ready to get on their knees for you left and right" Her voice trailed off.

Han winced. There had been someone, a brief spark that had quickly fizzled out, leaving him hesitant to put himself out there again. But that was different. This was y/n.

He took a long drag of his cigarette, watching the fire dissolve the tip every time he breathed the smoke in. "Dating shouldn't be a race, you know?" he said, his voice low and soothing. "The right person will come along when you least expect it."

"What if no one ever wants me?" The words spilled from her lips, raw and vulnerable. Tears welled up in her eyes, threatening to spill over. "No guy, no girl. What if I'm just… unlovable? I mean everyone seems to be coupled up. Jeongin and that girl are practically living at each other's places, even Hyunjin found some girl from a fashion school…."

The question hit Han like a physical blow. Y/n, unlovable? The fiercest, funniest girl he knew, a burst of joy and passion? It was a ridiculous conclusion that sparked a protectiveness within him. He stubbed out his cigarette, a sudden urgency gripping him.

"Hey, look at me, y/n," he said, his voice husky. "That's the most absurd thing I've ever heard. You're incredible. Smart, funny, loyal. You walk into a room and everyone looks your way, even if they don't admit it."

Heat stained her cheeks, a flicker of surprise lighting up her eyes. "Really?" she whispered, her voice barely audible. A flicker of hope, hesitant yet undeniable, danced in her gaze.

He couldn't hold back any longer. The truth, a truth he'd been grappling with for years, surged to the surface. "Really," he said, his gaze intense. "And the thing is, y/n…" He took another drag, the smoke swirling around him, mirroring the whirlwind brewing inside. "I like you. Like I like like you. Like more than a friend."

The room seemed to shrink, the rain a distant roar. Y/n's eyes widened, a mix of emotions swirling within. Then, a slow smile spread across her lips, chasing away the shadows.

"You do?" Her voice trembled with a mixture of disbelief and hope. A blush crept up her neck, warming her cheeks.

His eyes met her gaze, his heart hammering a frantic rhythm against his ribs. "Yeah," he admitted, his voice rough. "So maybe unlovable isn't quite the right word."

The air crackled with unspoken desire. The cigarette slipped forgotten from her fingers. In a swift, instinctive move, she leaned forward, closing the distance between them. Their lips met in a clash of heat and desperation. It was a kiss born of a long-suppressed longing and hidden desires.

His hand found its way to her cheek and her back, his touch sending shivers down her spine. He deepened the kiss, his fingers tangling in her hair, anchoring her to him as they pressed their bodies together. The taste of cherry chapstick and stale smoke was an intoxicating mix, but it was the electricity that coursed through them that stole the breath from their lungs. They pulled apart, gasping for air, foreheads resting together. The rain outside continued its relentless assault, but in the comfort of Han's room, a different kind of storm had just passed.

"See," he breathed, his voice husky. "Maybe you aren’t as unlovable as you think you are."

She chuckled a low rumble that vibrated against his lips. "Maybe not," she agreed, her eyes locked on his. "Definitely not."

[confused-bi-queer]

I want to come back to the fandom because Carry On has carried me for three years now and because I do not want to let a demonized mistake I mad mark the way I view my own writing and how I interact with people from different places.

But I do want to say that I won't publish or comment anything again about MalMage, at least not in the near time.

The reason I felt the need of using an AI to "write" something was because I was hyperfixated on that pair, because I was burnt out, and because I needed a distraction from an injury that's been recently affecting my life really badly. I wanted to see "new" MalMage content because there hasn't been since 2021 (so I've read every MalMage fic ever) that's not mine, and I got blocked for doing so by someone, in every single social media there is. It's alright if that's what you believe is moral and ethic for you, but you made me feel like shit.

I know I made a huge mistake and I'm sorry, but you pulverized one of the things I enjoyed the most in the fandom, in life, in my writing, and told me I was horrible for doing what I did, so I don't want to share my MalMage anymore here.

I'm even considering deleting the work from AO3 as well. I've been saying it as a joke, but they really are important to me, so putting my writing out there, being vulnerable, and saying something that was funny because AIs are stupid and don't compare to the real thing (because that was my conclusion: AIs suck), only to be severely criticized and blocked by one of the people I idolized and cared for the most in CO, is not what I what want from my fanfiction experience.

I just wanted to be happy, have fun and share it with you, people. My intention was never to harm anyone's work and anyone, full stop. And I hope you learn to hear someone's story to explain, not to justify, their wrongs.

And as I was told, I also don't want to beat myself over about this because I'm still learning and growing to be a better person, but no more MalMage from me. I get them for myself now.

[sofoulandfairaday]

1 for the ask game

from: choose violence ask game

1. the character everyone gets wrong

Err... all of them? I'm not even kidding. More on this here.

Bellatrix: fortunately there's been progress in the fandom, but for years everyone loved to describe her as an overly sexualized, crazy, shrieking mindless slave, when she's actually quite the opposite. She is sadistic, but not insane, she's passionate but not irrational (she is the only one who knew Snape was a traitor; to me, it's because of a peculiar mix of rationality and intuition that shows her to be actually quite intelligent). Nothing suggests her being promiscuous in the text and I would actually argue the opposite of her (why would she ever lower herself to sleep with someone who she deems her inferior - so basically everyone -, even just to satisfy mere physical desires? This post, to me, is Bella at her core).

Narcissa: this is canon Narcissa, all of you are perfectly entitled to your soft babygirl headcanons, of course, but then again you are perfectly entitled to be wrong <3 [also, shameless self-promo: x]

The blorboification continues for every single member of the Black family and I hate it so much you have no idea:

Andromeda: somehow described as a soft little girl who loved her mean, mean sisters so much and had to run away? Bitch stood up to seven centuries of tradition, and abandoned her sisters and parents, to marry a boy she had fallen in love with maybe two years prior (we know this based on Tonks' age). Good for her, but as I have said previously, both Narcissa and Andromeda (and Sirius, really) strike me as a bit selfish. The one with the romantic attachment to the idea of her family, the child most like Walburga, is Bellatrix.

But this is nothing, NOTHING, compared to what this fandom does to Regulus and Sirius.

Regulus: canonically a Voldemort fanboy, with newspaper clippings of him everywhere, and a blood supremacist. Sirius says it better than anyone: Reggie is soft. But not in the way the fandom believes, nope. He's just a coward who, much like Draco years later, was super excited to be like Bellatrix (Lucius) until he realized what killing really meant, what fighting a war really was, and most importantly because Voldemort touched him personally (Kreacher, whom he loved). Voldemort was probably a little more deranged than he had been at the beginning of the First War, and someone that had inherited the Black pride/haughtiness probably didn't like being branded like cattle and treated like a slave, on top of everything else.

Sirius: fanon Sirius is basically another character. Canon!Sirius is: tall, canonically incredibly handsome, quite masculine (in an explicit and toxic way, especially as a teenager in the fucking 1970s - the skirt-wearing, feminist one-liners spouting version of Sirius is something I just cannot get behind), a dick, a bit classist ((don't come @ me with your "oh, but what about Moony?!" because a) we don't know Remus' wealth when Lyall and Hope were still alive, we only know he can't get a job as an adult because of his condition and b) Remus is Sirius' exception, in the same way Lily is Snape's when he calls her a Mudblood - everyone else is in his eyes)), brave to the point of recklessness, quite cruel, funny, witty, magically talented, loyal to a fault, extremely charismatic and everything else outlined here. For the same reasons, I'll say Remus too.

Don't even get me started on Severus Snape. Other people have spoken on this better than I could ever. At least here on Tumblr, though, it seems to me that things are getting a little better after years of absolutely bizarre takes. Or maybe I've blocked all of the idiots idk.

Dumbledore. More on this here and maybe I'll outline my ideas better in a future post.

Also: I do not accept any characterization of Evan Rosier, Barty Crouch jr, Reggie, and Rabastan Lestrange as anything less than violent blood supremacists. Yes, they can be nuanced and gay (and only for each other might I add), but these people are the KKK (metaphorically, of course, because I hate comparing real-world tragedies to completely fictional ones, but still).

Lucius: a complete dick, but definitely not abusive. The man couldn't raise a hand to Draco if the Dark Lord threatened to kill him over it.

Speaking of which: my darling Lord Voldemort. Not much to say about him really because I know that some people do write him in a very interesting way (and I am open to interpretations of his character even if they are different from how I see him - and I have a very fucking specific vision of him). The problem is that perhaps three (3) of these people write him with Bellatrix and that saddens me.

Now, I mostly read First Wizarding War stuff or Death Eater stuff so I can't really speak to many other characters, especially in Harry's generation, but anything other than cowardly Draco is not a good Draco characterization to me. Ron is hands-down the best one in the Golden Trio and Ron Weasley bashing is pathetic. Hermione has faults but is ultimately a strong, take-no-bullshit girl and I'll take that over basically any and all female YA protagonists. And Harry is sassiness personified, but with a heart of gold, and oh-so-caring. Which is also why I can't read dark!Harry for the life of me. It just makes me giggle.

[roosterbruiser]

!! life update and face reveal incoming !!

we're doing a bullet point system!

had my very first one night stand. honestly? less than stellar! but I did it! the guy was kind of a loser, but we all have our things. he did like literally SLAP my tits so hard that I have massive bruises there now and I feel like that was a weird move bc we'd known each other for a grand total of about 10 minutes when we started having sex? anyway, it was insane having sex with like a stranger....don't know if I'd do it again, but you live and you learn!

overwhelmed with tinder honestly....I have over 1400 likes and I just......don't have it in me to do anything about them. but turns out I'm very good at flirting! and I'm also funny! was thinking about posting some screenshots of funny exchanges and labeling which ones are which member of the Dagger Squad! heh!

randomly matched with my ex (the one I was with from 14-17) on tinder and then we started talking and then we just........didn't stop? and like every single night since we started talking again, we've stayed up until 4am talking. what has shocked me the most is that we're getting along better now than we ever have before? and not to mention, he has like actually really apologized about things. not even just a blanket apology either--like a thorough one where he detailed things he did and told me that he was sorry.

he manages a movie theater so the first time we hung out, he took me to the empty theater (like we were the only two in the building) at like 10PM and we watched the new Evil Dead: Rise. and then the next night we parked at the lake from like 10PM-5AM and just....talked. for hours. about everything and nothing. it was insane! and then the next day, he picked me up for coffee and I met his puppy. we've been texting nonstop since. also he's literally taking me to the theater AGAIN to watch Top Gun: Maverick all by ourselves 😭

so in conclusion....I wanna fuck him. and maybe I'm catching feelings. BUT my sister and I are both very co-dependent people with have attachment issues (but at least we're self-aware) so I've decided to adopt her three month rule. so like, I have to talk to my ex for three months before I decide if I'm going to be in a relationship with him. not that it's going to happen or not but...you know!

the only thing is that I WISH I had more time to sit tf down and write! but I have a really busy weekend! I am so excited that I have so many asks to go through! and on that subject, if you sent me a birthday ask---I just fucking adore you! and KNOW that I saw it and KNOW that it made me giggle and kick my feet! however, I don't want to bombard all my followers with answering like 30 birthday wishes a few days late! BUT I LOVE THAT ALL OF YOU SENT THEM AND I WANNA KISS EVERYONE!

so today, I will be writing a bunch of requests and queuing them! I'm trying to get at least TWO posted today! looks like the next week or two will be dedicated to blurbs! but I can't wait to get back into my regularly scheduled posting! hoping to get that schedule out too!!

I'm really happy right now :)

okay here's my face reveal

be nice to me I'm fragile

[mischief-lies-and-stories]

Loki Episode 5 Coherent Thoughts

Spoilers for Episode 5. Once again, I have not rewatched before posting.

Most of this is lokius related because I'm still a damn fool.

I want the twist at the end to be that Loki gives Mobius (and the others) back his memories to give him the choice to go back to his life, and is just really sad about it, because he expects Mobius to want to go back to his kids who don't have a mother. But he gives him his memories of his past and they're... not what he saw when he found him. Like at all. I'm not gonna speculate on specifics (*cough* Theo Bell *cough*) but he doesn't have the responsibilities of being a single parent. And Loki's like 'No, but you had two boys,' and he tells Mobius about them and they both kind of realize at the same moment that they looked like Mobius but acted like Loki. None of that was real. Mobius made all that shit up and it somehow manifested. Because he's got it B-A-D for Loki, like a middle schooler with their first crush imagining an entire life with them.

Alternatively, I saw only one other post about this but maybe it's gotten some traction by now, but maybe Mobius's wife got Blipped four years prior. So the good thing is the boys are gonna have a parent in a year even if Mobius decides to stay with Loki.

Hi hello I'm still disturbed that these very young children have been possibly left home alone for eight hours (he says his shift is 9-5), and Mobius couldn't even answer the phone when they called. We don't see a babysitter. Mobius, this is neglect. For the children's sake, I fucking hope either A. they aren't real, or B. a more responsible parent is about to come back and take care of them in 2023. (Ugh, but Love having cousins who are about her age and just as chaotic as she is would be amazing.)

I've come up with the worst Dad joke and a way for Mobius to get out of his bribery with his kid he for sure cannot deliver on. He brings OB around for dinner. OB's timeline name (if I read the subtitles correctly) is A.D. Doug. ADDOUG=A DOG. And his TVA name is Ouroboros, the SNAKE eating its own tail. (Alternatively, you now know Loki, you can borrow his sons Fenrir and Jormungandr. Blended family.)

I know it hasn't been explicitly stated, but I thought the whole thing with Alioth in season one was meant to imply that Loki now knows how to restore memories. So why the fuck doesn't he try it in this episode? Even if he's pretty sure they're all where they were prior to the formation of the TVA, it's still after for him, so why wouldn't he at least try it? When he kept moving toward Mobius in the garage scene I thought he was gonna grab his head but he doesn't. (Maybe he was interrupted by OB, but he has ample opportunity later.)

It just needs to be said because I love history. I am obsessed with Casey being Frank Morris. Both he and Loki being central to these ongoing (technically) mysteries is amazing. Like unlike Cooper it is generally accepted that Frank and his co-escapees drowned during the attempt, but no bodies identified as the men were ever found (if my shallow dive into the wiki article immediately following the episode is to be believed). OB, your boyfriend's a convict lolololol!

AD Doug is still gender-neutral though. It's 1994 but my boi can still be enby. (I'm aware enby people existed well before this but, and the wiki is not being helpful, I think the specific term was coined in the mid to late 90s or possibly later, so OB may not have been aware of it.)

I don't think Marvel is moving toward Casey/OB (at least not before the end of this season, if we get another season it MIGHT be a different story), but fuck it would be so funny if they met so much later than lokius but were able to get their shit together faster than lokius. I think it'd check out for for everyone involved. Hell, maybe they're already together and it just hasn't come up yet to the group. That'd be funnier (bonus points if B-15 already knows though).

Loki for some fucking reason: Hold on, I gotta look cool and suave for this dork of a single dad who's already informed me at least three times of his own volition that he's single.